WEBVTT - Chapter Twelve 0:00:01.720 --> 0:00:06.880 Chapter twelve, Sasha the Lord did not mean for Sasha 0:00:06.920 --> 0:00:09.319 to be a cleaner. That was her first big lesson 0:00:09.360 --> 0:00:11.960 as a citizen of the Heavenly Kingdom. She was good 0:00:12.039 --> 0:00:14.160 enough at it, and she had too much self respect 0:00:14.160 --> 0:00:17.319 to complain, but the work felt so unrewarding that she 0:00:17.360 --> 0:00:19.680 knew it must not be what God wanted for her. 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:22.800 She'd spent her first night in the Kingdom being pampered 0:00:22.800 --> 0:00:25.240 and provided for by her fellow sisters in the Faith. 0:00:25.720 --> 0:00:28.280 They'd fed her, cleaned her, found her fresh clothes, and 0:00:28.320 --> 0:00:31.240 given her all the emotional rewards she could have ever wanted. 0:00:31.760 --> 0:00:33.879 And then the next day, Helen had woken her up 0:00:33.880 --> 0:00:35.760 at seven in the morning to help clean out an 0:00:35.760 --> 0:00:38.680 old Republic barracks that was being transitioned over to housing 0:00:38.720 --> 0:00:42.040 for soldiers of the Heavenly Kingdom. She knew it was 0:00:42.080 --> 0:00:45.199 honorable work, she knew it was necessary work, and she 0:00:45.280 --> 0:00:47.960 knew from the issues of Revelator she'd read that establishing 0:00:47.960 --> 0:00:49.960 the Kingdom of Heaven was a job that would not 0:00:50.040 --> 0:00:54.080 be accomplished easily or without pain. She'd accepted this when 0:00:54.120 --> 0:00:56.800 she'd made the choice to venture down here, but by 0:00:56.800 --> 0:00:59.200 the time she'd scrubbed her twelfth toilet of the day, 0:00:59.280 --> 0:01:01.560 Sasha had to ida that her mind and her loyalty 0:01:01.600 --> 0:01:05.360 were better used elsewhere. Oddly enough, something her father had 0:01:05.360 --> 0:01:07.760 told her about the corporate world stopped her from whining. 0:01:08.800 --> 0:01:11.760 Never complain, never speak ill of your colleagues, and always 0:01:11.800 --> 0:01:14.480 ask if there's more work you can do. It had 0:01:14.480 --> 0:01:17.080 been his advice to survive and thrive in business, but 0:01:17.160 --> 0:01:18.920 she took it to heart here, and by the end 0:01:18.920 --> 0:01:21.040 of her first full day in the kingdom, she'd scrubbed 0:01:21.040 --> 0:01:24.000 more toilets than any other girl. She hated the work, 0:01:24.080 --> 0:01:26.319 but she also took a perverse sort of pride in it. 0:01:26.720 --> 0:01:29.240 That brought a little guilt because she wasn't here to 0:01:29.280 --> 0:01:32.080 serve her pride, But also wouldn't the Lord God be 0:01:32.120 --> 0:01:35.120 happy to see her commitment. I'll ask Helen about that, 0:01:35.319 --> 0:01:37.800 Sasha told herself. She'll tell me how much of my 0:01:37.840 --> 0:01:41.600 pride is justified and how much isn't. She didn't see 0:01:41.640 --> 0:01:43.720 Helen again until the end of that day, when a 0:01:43.720 --> 0:01:45.880 truck came to gather all the girls up and take 0:01:45.920 --> 0:01:48.520 them back to the House of Miriam. They all washed 0:01:48.640 --> 0:01:51.360 up and then sat together around a large oaken table 0:01:51.400 --> 0:01:54.000 while Helen led them in prayer, she read a chunk 0:01:54.040 --> 0:01:56.040 of the Book of Isaiah, and then gave a quick 0:01:56.120 --> 0:01:59.480 lecture on the value of physical labor, each callous on 0:01:59.560 --> 0:02:02.480 your hand as a kiss from God, before inviting them 0:02:02.520 --> 0:02:06.760 to tuck in. The dinner wasn't luxurious by sasha standards, 0:02:06.800 --> 0:02:09.440 just biscuits, a thin brown gravy, and a palm sized 0:02:09.440 --> 0:02:11.600 slice of beef for each of them. But they had 0:02:11.639 --> 0:02:14.400 oranges for dessert, which was a treat, and Sasha felt 0:02:14.440 --> 0:02:17.280 more comfortable than she'd ever have believed. Among her new sisters, 0:02:18.200 --> 0:02:22.760 Caroline had fled from Florida, North America's bananaist Republic. She'd 0:02:22.760 --> 0:02:24.520 been shot in the arm making her way to the 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:28.000 Heavenly Kingdom. She said almost nothing. Sasha wasn't sure she 0:02:28.080 --> 0:02:31.360 even spoke English. But Caroline worked hard. There was an 0:02:31.400 --> 0:02:33.600 intensity in her eyes that was a little scary and 0:02:33.680 --> 0:02:36.960 humbling at the same time. Then there was Susannah from 0:02:37.000 --> 0:02:40.040 the black Stone Nation. Sasha couldn't help but notice she 0:02:40.120 --> 0:02:43.000 was the only black girl there. Susannah had spent most 0:02:43.040 --> 0:02:45.480 of their work day singing to herself. She had a 0:02:45.520 --> 0:02:49.119 beautiful singing voice. And then there were the three other 0:02:49.200 --> 0:02:52.680 am fed girls. Emmeline, Rosie, and Anne. They had all 0:02:52.760 --> 0:02:55.240 left a few weeks before Sasha had made her own journey. 0:02:55.480 --> 0:02:58.600 Anne had actually gone to the same middle school as Sasha. 0:02:58.800 --> 0:03:01.120 She wasn't great with name so most of the other 0:03:01.160 --> 0:03:03.160 girls in her group were still more of a collection 0:03:03.200 --> 0:03:06.000 of smiling faces than real people at this point, But 0:03:06.040 --> 0:03:08.280 they'd all been so warm to her. There was a 0:03:08.320 --> 0:03:11.600 real effort from all of them to make regular physical contact. 0:03:11.960 --> 0:03:14.560 They put hands on each other's shoulders and cheeks, They 0:03:14.600 --> 0:03:18.720 hugged constantly. Sasha experienced more touching in her first twenty 0:03:18.760 --> 0:03:21.519 four hours here than she'd experienced in her last five 0:03:21.600 --> 0:03:25.680 years in the American Federation. There was something intoxicating about 0:03:25.720 --> 0:03:29.360 being touched and feeling so cared for. The only girl 0:03:29.480 --> 0:03:32.519 she didn't like was May. Like Sasha, May was within 0:03:32.600 --> 0:03:35.920 spitting distance of age eighteen, She'd fled from the UCS, 0:03:36.000 --> 0:03:38.160 and she had a gift for letting people around her 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:41.320 know when they fell short of God's standards. During their 0:03:41.320 --> 0:03:43.960 work day, she'd spent more time policing the other girl's 0:03:44.040 --> 0:03:47.520 posture than she'd spent scrubbing toilets. When Anne had hitched 0:03:47.560 --> 0:03:49.680 up her shirt sleeves, it was May who had scolded 0:03:49.680 --> 0:03:52.400 her for a modesty. When Susannah took off her shoes 0:03:52.400 --> 0:03:54.960 and socks during their lunch break, May had yelled that 0:03:55.040 --> 0:03:58.400 she was an unfair temptation to the young soldiers walking 0:03:58.440 --> 0:04:01.560 by on the street. Sasha knew it was unfair and 0:04:01.640 --> 0:04:05.200 definitely Unchristian to feel this way, but May looked like 0:04:05.320 --> 0:04:07.440 someone who lived to tell other people what to do. 0:04:07.920 --> 0:04:10.680 She had the pinched features, squinting eyes, and high pitched 0:04:10.760 --> 0:04:13.760 voice of a born snitch. May kept her hair tied 0:04:13.800 --> 0:04:16.400 up in a bun so tight and short it looked military. 0:04:16.760 --> 0:04:20.000 She never smiled and never seemed to relax, and there 0:04:20.040 --> 0:04:23.280 was something about the frenzied way she'd pray alone quietly 0:04:23.279 --> 0:04:26.240 in the corner throughout the day that made Sasha leery. 0:04:26.800 --> 0:04:29.640 She hated that she'd noticed those things. She knew God 0:04:29.680 --> 0:04:32.240 didn't want her focusing on what other people were doing wrong. 0:04:32.600 --> 0:04:35.560 And besides, she told herself, what are you really angry 0:04:35.600 --> 0:04:38.800 about that? She's too serious about her faith. Isn't that 0:04:38.839 --> 0:04:42.280 way you left home? Gluttony is a sin too, you know, 0:04:42.760 --> 0:04:45.720 May said. Sasha realized with a start that May had 0:04:45.720 --> 0:04:48.479 addressed her. She had been eating her orange and absent 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:50.800 minded and tired after a long day of labor. She 0:04:50.880 --> 0:04:53.760 hadn't realized how messy she'd been about peeling it. Her 0:04:53.800 --> 0:04:56.599 hands and sleeves were covered with a sticky juice. She 0:04:56.640 --> 0:04:58.560 looked around at the table and noticed that the other 0:04:58.600 --> 0:05:02.560 girls had been much more careful their dessert. Sorry, Sasha started, 0:05:02.600 --> 0:05:05.479 I wasn't thinking. May rolled her eyes and started to 0:05:05.480 --> 0:05:08.480 say something else, but Helen cut her off. It's quite 0:05:08.480 --> 0:05:11.400 all right, dear. None of us is perfect. She cast 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:13.840 a reproach for lie at May. And we all lose 0:05:13.880 --> 0:05:17.719 ourselves and thoughts sometimes, especially in the wake of great change. 0:05:18.120 --> 0:05:21.120 The Lord understands. She looked out to the rest of 0:05:21.160 --> 0:05:23.159 the table with a gaze that seemed to take in 0:05:23.240 --> 0:05:27.279 each of the girls collectively and individually. Then she spoke, 0:05:28.440 --> 0:05:31.480 we are all here because we recognize the primacy of 0:05:31.560 --> 0:05:34.640 God's word on earth. But we are no more perfect 0:05:34.760 --> 0:05:37.400 and no more beloved by our Lord than the enemies 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:41.000 we face. Never forget that, girls, our foes are as 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:43.520 dear to Him as we are. They must be purged 0:05:43.560 --> 0:05:46.080 when they seek to interfere with God's will, But we 0:05:46.120 --> 0:05:49.240 should feel sorrow for such losses, and we should never 0:05:49.640 --> 0:05:52.840 ever Her eyes went to May again, let our fortune 0:05:52.839 --> 0:05:55.920 in hearing God's word bleat us of compassion, or lead 0:05:56.000 --> 0:06:00.200 us to arrogance. Sasha's heart swelled at this. She never 0:06:00.240 --> 0:06:03.040 admired a woman more. Helen had a way of imparting 0:06:03.080 --> 0:06:05.919 wisdom without judgment, of shining a light on the truth 0:06:06.000 --> 0:06:09.360 without seeming like it was her truth alone. Helen wasn't 0:06:09.360 --> 0:06:12.120 a preacher, but Sasha had never heard anyone speak the 0:06:12.120 --> 0:06:15.560 word of God with more conviction. After dinner, they had 0:06:15.560 --> 0:06:18.000 an hour of free time to read their bibles, share 0:06:18.040 --> 0:06:20.279 a few stories of their old lives, and drink a 0:06:20.320 --> 0:06:23.440 single cup of sweet lemon tea. By nine o'clock it 0:06:23.520 --> 0:06:26.640 was bedtime. Sasha was rankled a bit by the fact 0:06:26.640 --> 0:06:28.839 that she and her fellow young women were being ordered 0:06:28.839 --> 0:06:31.000 into bed at a set hour, but she was so 0:06:31.080 --> 0:06:33.360 exhausted by her day of labor that she couldn't work 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:37.200 up much frustration over the mild injustice. Perhaps, when she'd 0:06:37.240 --> 0:06:39.680 had more time to adjust, she'd bring this up to Helen. 0:06:40.360 --> 0:06:43.040 She collapsed in her bunk bed, certain she'd fall asleep 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:45.760 in an instant. Instead, she lay awake for the better 0:06:45.760 --> 0:06:49.240 part of an hour, thinking of Alexander. She'd still heard 0:06:49.279 --> 0:06:52.320 nothing more from him or about him. She'd asked Helen 0:06:52.360 --> 0:06:54.200 a couple of times today, and the older woman had 0:06:54.240 --> 0:06:58.200 almost seemed angry. Somehow, Sasha knew the anger wasn't towards her, 0:06:58.600 --> 0:07:03.279 and that was doubly confusing Sasha. Anne's voice broke her reverie. 0:07:03.600 --> 0:07:05.680 The other girl was situated just below her on the 0:07:05.720 --> 0:07:09.760 bunk bed. Sasha was surprised to hear her still awake. Yes, 0:07:10.040 --> 0:07:13.720 is something the matter? No, Anne said, I just couldn't sleep. 0:07:14.080 --> 0:07:17.040 I thought maybe you were awake too. I guess we're 0:07:17.040 --> 0:07:19.760 both in the same boat. Then Sasha kept her voice low, 0:07:20.000 --> 0:07:22.000 more to avoid waking any of the others than out 0:07:22.040 --> 0:07:25.000 of fear of breaking the rules in more ways than one. 0:07:25.160 --> 0:07:27.880 Anne said, I'm waiting for a man I love too. 0:07:28.720 --> 0:07:31.320 Sasha's heart beat a little faster. It was like that, 0:07:31.400 --> 0:07:34.200 with everything that made her think of Alexander, her mind 0:07:34.240 --> 0:07:36.840 didn't need a great deal of prodding to turn towards him. 0:07:37.600 --> 0:07:40.480 Your love is at the front, too, Sasha asked, I 0:07:40.600 --> 0:07:43.320 think so, Anne said, I was lucky enough to get 0:07:43.360 --> 0:07:46.360 to see him once I arrived in Kappel first, back 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.120 before the Kingdom took Plaino. We met once then and 0:07:49.200 --> 0:07:51.240 once more after the city fell and they moved us 0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:55.680 into the House of Miriam, Jealousy seized Sasha's heart. She 0:07:55.760 --> 0:07:58.480 tried to replace it with gratitude in the Lord, he'd 0:07:58.520 --> 0:08:01.600 send her someone who can understand pain and frustration. Wasn't 0:08:01.640 --> 0:08:05.119 that a blessing? That must be hard for you, she said, 0:08:05.360 --> 0:08:08.400 getting to see him and then being separated. The words 0:08:08.440 --> 0:08:11.239 came out a bit stilted and cold. She hoped Anne 0:08:11.280 --> 0:08:14.920 hadn't noticed it is. Anne said, but it isn't half 0:08:14.960 --> 0:08:17.480 so rough a place as you're in. I can't imagine 0:08:17.480 --> 0:08:21.160 how anxious you must be arriving here and not seeing him. 0:08:21.240 --> 0:08:24.240 He's not the only reason I came, Sasha said, a 0:08:24.280 --> 0:08:28.880 bit defensively, But yes, it's hard. I'm scared. I don't 0:08:28.920 --> 0:08:32.560 know why I feel so silly, Admitting that it's certainly 0:08:32.559 --> 0:08:35.760 not silly, Anne assured her, But I get it. Everyone 0:08:35.880 --> 0:08:38.800 here is so focused on gratitude and God's wisdom. It 0:08:38.880 --> 0:08:41.440 almost makes you feel like a traitor for feeling afraid 0:08:41.840 --> 0:08:45.280 or unhappy. Anne's voice dropped a few decibels, as if 0:08:45.320 --> 0:08:48.360 she was ashamed of her next words, I almost feel 0:08:48.400 --> 0:08:51.640 like a liar when I smile. I don't think the 0:08:51.679 --> 0:08:54.679 Lord wants us to be liars, Sasha said, but I 0:08:54.720 --> 0:08:57.520 think being happy, or trying to seem happy, is a 0:08:57.559 --> 0:09:00.559 sacrifice we make for the kingdom. It helps keep everyone 0:09:00.600 --> 0:09:05.160 else around us strong. Hm hm, Anne said, and then yawned. 0:09:05.559 --> 0:09:08.160 Her voice sounded heavy with sleep. There must have been 0:09:08.200 --> 0:09:11.000 something contagious in the sound, because Sasha felt her own 0:09:11.000 --> 0:09:13.920 eyelids start to droop. That's a nice way to look 0:09:13.960 --> 0:09:16.760 at it, Anne said, I like the way you think, Sasha. 0:09:25.320 --> 0:09:27.880 Helen woke all of them up the next morning. She 0:09:28.040 --> 0:09:30.360 was gentle with it, a hand on each girl's shoulder 0:09:30.360 --> 0:09:32.200 and a word in each of their ears, but there 0:09:32.240 --> 0:09:35.839 was no mistaking that she meant now. So Sasha got up. 0:09:36.120 --> 0:09:38.040 Her feet hit the floor just as Anne took her 0:09:38.080 --> 0:09:41.600 first steps forward towards the dining room. They all filed in, 0:09:41.920 --> 0:09:45.160 silent and groggy. The girls took their breakfasts in the 0:09:45.200 --> 0:09:47.760 form of a thick, tasteless protein shake, and then they 0:09:47.760 --> 0:09:50.800 were loaded onto a heavy military looking bus and driven 0:09:50.840 --> 0:09:53.880 off to a large, red brick office building. According to 0:09:53.920 --> 0:09:56.679 the bullet poxed signs, it had once been an administrative 0:09:56.679 --> 0:09:58.880 building for the corporation that had run most of the 0:09:58.920 --> 0:10:03.559 Republic schools. Sasha swept up bullet casings and shattered glass. 0:10:03.600 --> 0:10:05.840 She scrubbed toilets and wiped the blood off the walls, 0:10:05.880 --> 0:10:08.000 and tried not to think too hard about how it 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:11.480 had gotten there. Conversation wasn't forbidden, but there was a 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:13.439 lot of ground to cover, and May was quick to 0:10:13.480 --> 0:10:17.040 scold anyone who dawdled. Sasha and Anne both kept moving, 0:10:17.200 --> 0:10:19.680 but they passed each other in the halls often. Each 0:10:19.720 --> 0:10:22.640 time the other girl would favor Sasha with a supportive smile, 0:10:22.840 --> 0:10:25.640 and Sasha would return it. They broke for lunch a 0:10:25.679 --> 0:10:29.360 little afternoon, stale cheese sandwiches and orange juice, but instead 0:10:29.360 --> 0:10:31.160 of getting back to work after their meal, they were 0:10:31.200 --> 0:10:33.080 met again by the bus that had taken them there. 0:10:33.360 --> 0:10:36.240 They were told to file inside. Sasha wound up in 0:10:36.280 --> 0:10:38.960 between Anne and Susannah in the middle row of the bus. 0:10:39.400 --> 0:10:42.000 It was hot, the air circulation was bad, and the 0:10:42.000 --> 0:10:44.440 smell of sweat was thick on the bus, but the 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:47.160 windows were down, and once the bus got going, the 0:10:47.240 --> 0:10:50.560 air that blew in felt like Heaven, Lord God, I've 0:10:50.559 --> 0:10:53.520 been waiting for this all day, said Susannah. I'd stay 0:10:53.559 --> 0:10:55.920 on this thing all night if they led me. Yeah, 0:10:55.960 --> 0:10:58.600 Anne said, this is actually a lot more comfortable than 0:10:58.679 --> 0:11:00.840 the bunk room, even when the hours working in the 0:11:00.880 --> 0:11:03.600 fans are on. Does the power go out a lot? 0:11:03.720 --> 0:11:06.400 Sasha asked. She felt dumb for even giving voice to 0:11:06.440 --> 0:11:08.760 the question, but her seatmates didn't treat it like a 0:11:08.760 --> 0:11:12.520 stupid question. Not a lot, Anne said, but we'll lose 0:11:12.559 --> 0:11:14.640 an hour or two most days, and it can be 0:11:14.679 --> 0:11:16.960 out for quite a while when Austin gets a drone through. 0:11:17.960 --> 0:11:21.080 That doesn't happen often. Susannah assured her. I've been in 0:11:21.120 --> 0:11:23.160 the Kingdom ten days and we've only had to take 0:11:23.240 --> 0:11:27.280 shelter once twice for me. Anne said, but I've been 0:11:27.320 --> 0:11:31.079 here almost three weeks. I'm not scared, Sasha assured them. 0:11:31.200 --> 0:11:36.760 I'm just curious. You should be scared. Susannah said, it sucks. 0:11:38.200 --> 0:11:40.800 It wasn't a long ride, and Sasha was embarrassed at 0:11:40.840 --> 0:11:43.560 how long it took her to realize the destination. This 0:11:43.679 --> 0:11:45.920 was the same route they'd taken from the House of Miriam, 0:11:46.160 --> 0:11:48.760 just in reverse. She and the other girls were being 0:11:48.800 --> 0:11:51.960 taken downtown. Won't she got a good look at the gallows, 0:11:52.120 --> 0:11:55.160 she understood why there were six people lined up in 0:11:55.200 --> 0:11:57.959 front of the little stairway that led to the platform. 0:11:58.000 --> 0:12:02.360 They looked like prisoners. Susannah looked just as confused as Sasha, 0:12:02.720 --> 0:12:05.600 but Anne seemed to understand what was going on. She 0:12:05.679 --> 0:12:09.320 scrunched her face in disgust. Oh no, she said, I 0:12:09.520 --> 0:12:12.760 hate it when they make us watch this. The two 0:12:12.800 --> 0:12:14.880 martyrs who had guarded them all day opened the doors 0:12:14.920 --> 0:12:17.079 and told them to form up outside of the bus. 0:12:17.360 --> 0:12:19.600 Sasha did as she was told, while grabbing as many 0:12:19.679 --> 0:12:22.480 long looks at the gallows as she could manage. None 0:12:22.480 --> 0:12:24.040 of the people who stood out in front of the 0:12:24.080 --> 0:12:27.080 platform looked like soldiers, or robber barons, or much of 0:12:27.120 --> 0:12:31.520 anything at all. They just seemed young and scared fags. 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:33.960 The martyr standing next to the driver at the bus 0:12:34.000 --> 0:12:37.199 door grunted as Sasha stepped past him. He waited until 0:12:37.240 --> 0:12:39.360 the other girls had all filed off the bus before 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:41.880 he stepped around to stand in front of them. Sasha 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:44.400 hadn't paid the man too much attention during the day, because, 0:12:44.480 --> 0:12:47.560 in truth, he scared her. He looked old, over forty 0:12:47.600 --> 0:12:50.400 at least, and his face was heavy with scars and tattoos. 0:12:50.800 --> 0:12:53.800 There were faded blue crosses inked on each of his forearms. 0:12:54.080 --> 0:12:56.760 There wasn't much skin visible under his armor and helmet, 0:12:56.880 --> 0:12:59.559 but the skin she could see was tanned red like leather. 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:03.120 His eyes were cold and seemed fixed into a permanent squint. 0:13:03.400 --> 0:13:05.319 When he addressed the group, it was with a voice 0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:07.360 that sounded like it came to them through a filter 0:13:07.480 --> 0:13:11.240 of gravel and glass. These people, he said, and spat 0:13:11.320 --> 0:13:14.760 after the word people a gender traitors. There were a 0:13:14.760 --> 0:13:17.880 few gasps from among the crowd. He continued. It took 0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:20.360 us a while to crack into the Republic's old files, 0:13:20.400 --> 0:13:22.440 but we finally got a list of all the fags 0:13:22.480 --> 0:13:25.760 who refused to accept their God given gender. They thought 0:13:25.840 --> 0:13:28.160 surgery could hide him. But there's no hide in the 0:13:28.200 --> 0:13:30.840 truth from the eyes of God or his true servants, 0:13:31.160 --> 0:13:33.959 and there's only one fair punishment for someone who turns 0:13:34.000 --> 0:13:38.280 their back on natural law. Sasha's heart started to pound. 0:13:38.679 --> 0:13:42.400 She'd known, of course, that Pastor Mike didn't approve of transgenderism, 0:13:42.440 --> 0:13:46.000 of gender change surgery, of homosexuality, or of anything else 0:13:46.040 --> 0:13:48.680 that didn't fit into the neat biblical lines of what 0:13:48.760 --> 0:13:51.240 a man and a woman ought to be, but it 0:13:51.320 --> 0:13:55.000 always phrased his objections with such compassion. Queer and trans 0:13:55.000 --> 0:13:58.320 people weren't monsters deserving of death. They were victims of 0:13:58.320 --> 0:14:02.160 the fallen secular world, same as anyone else. Sasha agreed 0:14:02.200 --> 0:14:06.439 they needed re education, but this the crowd, perhaps three 0:14:06.480 --> 0:14:09.000 hundred strong, cheered as the prisoners were led up to 0:14:09.000 --> 0:14:12.360 the gallows. Sasha's heart beat like a bass drum. She 0:14:12.400 --> 0:14:15.200 couldn't hear anything else. The voices of the crowd, of 0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:17.720 her sister's faded behind the beating sound of the blood 0:14:17.760 --> 0:14:20.680 that coursed through her head. But her eyes continued to work, 0:14:20.840 --> 0:14:23.600 and she watched in horror as they fit nooses around 0:14:23.600 --> 0:14:27.440 each victim's neck. The young people cried and screamed and begged, 0:14:27.600 --> 0:14:29.840 but the martyrs paid them no mind. Some of them 0:14:29.920 --> 0:14:32.920 chanted in tongues while they prepared the killing machine. Sasha 0:14:32.960 --> 0:14:36.920 saw joy in their eyes. She found it revolting. Before long, 0:14:36.960 --> 0:14:40.120 they'd finished their preparations, and six people were strung up 0:14:40.120 --> 0:14:42.680 on the gallows before the brays and cries of the crowd. 0:14:43.520 --> 0:14:45.720 Sasha didn't think it was possible for her heart to 0:14:45.720 --> 0:14:48.720 beat any faster, but it kept speeding up. She felt 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:51.320 light headed and nauseous, and a little like she needed 0:14:51.360 --> 0:14:53.880 to go to the bathroom. Her knees grew weak, and 0:14:53.960 --> 0:14:56.880 she found herself leaning on Anne. The other woman looked 0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:59.600 almost as scared as Sasha did, but she weathered it better. 0:15:00.080 --> 0:15:02.600 She put an arm around Sasha, supporting her, and the 0:15:02.640 --> 0:15:05.080 two of them looked on as the executioner called out 0:15:05.160 --> 0:15:07.800 and pulled the lever that sent six human beings dropping 0:15:07.880 --> 0:15:10.880 down to dangle until they were dead. The snap of 0:15:10.920 --> 0:15:13.080 their necks was the only thing Sasha heard above the 0:15:13.120 --> 0:15:16.080 sound of her own pounding heart. She watched them twitch 0:15:16.120 --> 0:15:18.760 and jerk for a second two, and then her body 0:15:18.800 --> 0:15:21.840 grew too light, and her legs collapsed beneath her. The 0:15:21.880 --> 0:15:26.840 world went black. She awoke back in the house of Miriam. 0:15:27.200 --> 0:15:30.560 Her sisters knelt or stood around her. Sasha was gratified 0:15:30.600 --> 0:15:32.960 to see she wasn't the only one who'd passed out. 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:36.600 Anne lay next to her, clearly disoriented, along with two 0:15:36.600 --> 0:15:40.080 other women whose name Sasha hadn't quite memorized. Helen set 0:15:40.120 --> 0:15:43.040 in between them, wet washcloth in her hand, and stroked 0:15:43.080 --> 0:15:46.600 their faces. There, there, DearS, you've had a terrible shock, 0:15:46.880 --> 0:15:50.840 and there's no shame in your reactions. No shame may 0:15:50.880 --> 0:15:53.000 spat the words. There was a glow to her face 0:15:53.080 --> 0:15:55.600 and a manic glint in her eyes. Ma'am, with all 0:15:55.680 --> 0:15:57.520 due respect, I don't know how these girls can call 0:15:57.560 --> 0:15:59.800 themselves committed to the heavenly kingdom if the sight of 0:15:59.840 --> 0:16:03.680 to find justice hurts them so much. Sasha saw anger 0:16:03.760 --> 0:16:06.000 in Helen's eyes, but the older woman didn't let it 0:16:06.080 --> 0:16:09.080 carry over into her voice. Instead, she fixed May with 0:16:09.120 --> 0:16:12.440 a cool gaze and said in an even tone, Miss May, 0:16:12.680 --> 0:16:15.680 one can believe in our Lord's justice and still regret 0:16:15.760 --> 0:16:18.600 the pain that comes with it. That does not signal 0:16:18.640 --> 0:16:22.160 a lack of devotion. It signals compassion, a trait Jesus 0:16:22.200 --> 0:16:25.840 Christ had an abundance. May frowned and pursed her lips, 0:16:25.920 --> 0:16:28.280 but she kept them shut for now. Helen turned back 0:16:28.280 --> 0:16:31.120 to Sasha and the other girls who had fallen. Death 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:33.720 is never easy to witness, girls. It should be a 0:16:33.760 --> 0:16:36.720 horrible thing to witness. She glanced back to May. And 0:16:36.840 --> 0:16:39.120 we should all be worried if a day ever comes 0:16:39.120 --> 0:16:42.479 when we can see such violence without pain in our hearts. 0:16:42.480 --> 0:16:45.720 But these are dire times. The world has fallen too 0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:48.240 much for pacifism to bring back the rule of God, 0:16:48.680 --> 0:16:53.360 and so we must use violence. Do you understand? Sasha nodded. 0:16:53.520 --> 0:16:56.960 She heard the other girls give stuttering, hollow replies. Even 0:16:56.960 --> 0:17:00.200 the girls who'd managed to stay standing looked shaken. May 0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:02.560 was the only one who wore a smile. They gave 0:17:02.560 --> 0:17:05.560 her a wide berth the rest of the day. Whoever 0:17:05.680 --> 0:17:08.119 was in charge of their schedule paid some deference to 0:17:08.119 --> 0:17:10.480 the fact that they had been forced to watch in execution. 0:17:10.960 --> 0:17:13.639 There was no more cleaning that day. They spent the 0:17:13.640 --> 0:17:16.320 rest of the daylight hours seated around the common area 0:17:16.359 --> 0:17:20.080 in the House of Miriam sewing uniforms. Sasha had never 0:17:20.119 --> 0:17:22.560 sewn before, but Anne sat next to her and taught 0:17:22.560 --> 0:17:25.479 her the basics. Her hands were still shaking when they 0:17:25.520 --> 0:17:28.639 got to work, but Anne helped her and eventually, focusing 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:31.399 on the meticulous task allowed her to blot out the horror. 0:17:31.840 --> 0:17:33.679 Once she got a good grip on the basics of 0:17:33.720 --> 0:17:35.720 what was required of her, she was able to lose 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:39.520 herself and quiet productive flow. She was almost disappointed when 0:17:39.520 --> 0:17:42.400 Helen called them to dinner. They ate the same food 0:17:42.440 --> 0:17:45.119 as the day before. They prayed, and then they had 0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:48.280 an hour of relatively free time. They couldn't leave the 0:17:48.280 --> 0:17:50.439 House of Miriam since it was after eight, but they 0:17:50.440 --> 0:17:54.560 could talk. Sasha gravitated naturally to Susannah and Anne. The 0:17:54.600 --> 0:17:58.119 topic of conversation turned at once to the execution. Is 0:17:58.160 --> 0:18:02.040 that always what it's like, Sue, Sanna asked. Anne nodded. 0:18:02.400 --> 0:18:05.040 Her voice shook a little when she said, I passed 0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:07.760 out last time too. I thought it'd be easier the 0:18:07.800 --> 0:18:11.440 second time around, but it really wasn't it feels wrong, 0:18:11.640 --> 0:18:14.280 Sasha whispered. She glanced over to May, who was holding 0:18:14.280 --> 0:18:15.800 court with a few of the other girls at the 0:18:15.800 --> 0:18:18.160 other end of the common area. I'm not saying it's 0:18:18.160 --> 0:18:20.840 okay what those people were doing, but surely they deserved 0:18:20.840 --> 0:18:24.920 a chance to repent. Susannah nodded. I don't think Jesus 0:18:24.920 --> 0:18:27.240 would want us to murder people just for being wrong. 0:18:27.640 --> 0:18:29.960 It's one thing to kill an atheist or an apostate 0:18:29.960 --> 0:18:33.200 who's attacking you. It's another thing to just Her voice 0:18:33.240 --> 0:18:37.199 caught a bit hank people. Anne shook her head in 0:18:37.200 --> 0:18:42.000 an absent sort of way. Kyle told me it was necessary. Kyle, 0:18:42.440 --> 0:18:46.480 Susannah asked, my intended Anne said, I watched the first 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:49.720 execution with him when I passed out. He was so sweet. 0:18:49.960 --> 0:18:52.440 I came to when he was holding me, petting my head. 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:55.160 Anne's eyes shone with love, and Sasha had to fight 0:18:55.240 --> 0:18:57.919 hard to keep the jealousy from her own face. He 0:18:58.000 --> 0:19:00.800 explained that the Heavenly Kingdom couldn't afford to re educate 0:19:00.880 --> 0:19:03.879 the fallen. They are too many and we are too surrounded. 0:19:04.200 --> 0:19:07.000 If someone is capable of changing, God will know, and 0:19:07.119 --> 0:19:09.480 he will ensure they get their just reward in heaven. 0:19:10.600 --> 0:19:14.000 Sasha was not entirely convinced, but she also wasn't willing 0:19:14.040 --> 0:19:16.480 to argue with Anne. It felt a little dicey just 0:19:16.560 --> 0:19:20.600 admitting her continued discomfort with the executions, so she stayed quiet, 0:19:20.640 --> 0:19:23.240 and the talk turned to more comfortable matters, what they 0:19:23.280 --> 0:19:25.439 expected from the next day's work and what sort of 0:19:25.480 --> 0:19:27.719 lives they lead. When the fighting was over and they 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:30.359 were settled down with the Gallant warriors, they knew they'd 0:19:30.400 --> 0:19:33.679 marry soon. The girls all filed off to their small 0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:37.320 snug beds after a long day of work and stress. 0:19:37.359 --> 0:19:40.440 The bed felt so good that it made Sasha feel guilty. 0:19:40.840 --> 0:19:44.040 Alexander was fighting right now, he'd surely seem more death 0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:45.919 than she had, and he didn't have the option of 0:19:45.960 --> 0:19:48.760 fainting or crying about it. As she drifted off to 0:19:48.800 --> 0:19:51.879 sleep again, Sasha promised herself that she would never faint 0:19:52.000 --> 0:19:54.720 or cry out in the face of death again. If 0:19:54.720 --> 0:19:57.480 this was the way God had ordained, his kingdom must come, 0:19:57.600 --> 0:20:00.040 she owed it to herself and to her Lord to 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:03.800 stand and see it. The next day, they all went 0:20:03.840 --> 0:20:06.879 back to the same battered administrative building as the day before. 0:20:07.359 --> 0:20:10.080 Sasha scrubbed and swept ate her lunch and got right 0:20:10.080 --> 0:20:13.159 back to work. She forced herself into enthusiasm for the 0:20:13.200 --> 0:20:15.600 menial labor with the same discipline she'd used when it 0:20:15.640 --> 0:20:17.399 had been time to study for an exam and a 0:20:17.440 --> 0:20:20.400