Speaker 1: Boom. If you thought four hours a day, minutes a
Speaker 1: week was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants
Speaker 1: of the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He
Speaker 1: treats crackheads in the ghetto cutter the same as the
Speaker 1: rich pill poppers in the penthouse the clearing House of
Speaker 1: hot takes break free for something special. The Fifth Hour
Speaker 1: with Ben Maller starts right now. It is the Fifth
Speaker 1: Hour with Ben Maller. We do this four hours a
Speaker 1: night during the week, and that's not enough, clearly, because
Speaker 1: we do this on the weekend. Here eight days a week.
Speaker 1: This is the Saturday Podcast and the weight has ended.
Speaker 1: Now the new running mate side by side on the
Speaker 1: Fifth Hour with Ben Maller, a blast from the past.
Speaker 1: Give it up for Danny g Radio. There is the
Speaker 1: man the mid I'm Anthony Davis, and you are Lebron James. No, no,
Speaker 1: I'm not Lebron. No No, I don't call me Lebron James.
Speaker 1: How dare you? How dare you? I am Kauai Leonard.
Speaker 1: You are Paul George. That's how that goes. I like
Speaker 1: that you're wearing a Laker hat though. That's good. That's
Speaker 1: a solid You haven't changed your wardrobe. But I like
Speaker 1: that repping the Lakers even though they're not playing very
Speaker 1: well this year. And I like how you're wearing a
Speaker 1: Brooklyn nets hat. That is the great that is the
Speaker 1: b with the Ben Dodgers and not the Brooklyn Dodgers,
Speaker 1: the Ben Dodgers. Nice Nets hat. Yeah, so the question
Speaker 1: I have been asked more than anything. Danny uh Gascon
Speaker 1: was the podcast for a while and then he bailed out,
Speaker 1: and then we were trying to find somebody and you
Speaker 1: were the first name that popped up. Uh said, Danny.
Speaker 1: J that's the guy. That's the guy that I want.
Speaker 1: But we had to convince you to do it, Danny,
Speaker 1: and there's not a lot in it. So how were
Speaker 1: we of a twist your arm to get you to
Speaker 1: join the Fifth Hour podcast? Was it a momentous It's
Speaker 1: actually that I have insomnia. I have certain hours available
Speaker 1: that I was used to not only doing your show,
Speaker 1: but outkicked the coverage. I'm like, what do I do
Speaker 1: with these hours so I can stay productive? Yeah? No, no,
Speaker 1: and it's good because I have we record this podcast
Speaker 1: that really ungodly hours. If people when we recorded the
Speaker 1: Fifth Hour podcast, they would say, man, that's a crazy person.
Speaker 1: But it fits the schedule, and I'm glad it worked out,
Speaker 1: and I loved having on the show back in the day.
Speaker 1: Then you know, I was upset when you left. I
Speaker 1: don't want you to leave the show and you yeah,
Speaker 1: you got promoter, which I'm happy about. And I'm glad
Speaker 1: we can do this podcast and play Grab Bass on
Speaker 1: the weekend. And you've been a radio a ton. We
Speaker 1: had you on a few weeks ago, and I want
Speaker 1: to point out at the time we had you on,
Speaker 1: this was not even in play. We didn't know that
Speaker 1: this was a possibility, right, This is kind of popped up.
Speaker 1: They didn't even want you on a fourth hour, let
Speaker 1: alone a bit. Yeah, exactly, exactly exactly. So so anyway,
Speaker 1: this popped up right after that. It was I don't
Speaker 1: know what the word is you want to look for.
Speaker 1: It was synergy, it was serendipity, whatever it might be.
Speaker 1: But but you popped up here. But you've been been
Speaker 1: been on the show before for years. And as I
Speaker 1: always point out, I I obsessed during the day with
Speaker 1: these dopey monologues that I do about sports. I spent
Speaker 1: a lot of time, a lot of blood sweat and
Speaker 1: tears and often, and you know this from working in
Speaker 1: the radio all these years, the thing that people like
Speaker 1: the most is none of that. They don't want to
Speaker 1: hear any of that. They don't care what I think
Speaker 1: about any of the sports teams. But what I had
Speaker 1: for lunch on Wednesday is very important. Yeah, It's true
Speaker 1: when you pull back the curtain, it is more interesting
Speaker 1: your life in some of the lives of some of
Speaker 1: the hacks that we enjoy to listen to or watch
Speaker 1: on television, that is definitely more interesting than most of
Speaker 1: the burned out sports stories that we get fram down
Speaker 1: our air holes. When I tune on the radio or
Speaker 1: I turned on the sports shows on TV, I hear
Speaker 1: the same takes over and over again. Except I gotta
Speaker 1: give our FSR line up some credit. I do hear
Speaker 1: some different takes on our network, but on some of
Speaker 1: the other networks it's just the same regurgitated takes over
Speaker 1: and over. Well. Part of the problem also is a
Speaker 1: lot of as you know, programmers in radio, they just
Speaker 1: play the hits Mama and not our guy, but do
Speaker 1: the same thing over and over again. Because they in
Speaker 1: the way that radio worse. People turn over the audience
Speaker 1: turns over a lot. Although we're lucky on the overnight
Speaker 1: that people do because they work in factories and drive
Speaker 1: trucks or where they're up all night, they listen for
Speaker 1: more than ten minutes. If you get somebody during the
Speaker 1: day to listen for ten minutes, you've won the lottery. Uh.
Speaker 1: The people don't listen that long, and you're in the
Speaker 1: car you listen with half a year, So it's a
Speaker 1: whole it's a whole different to do. So we're gonna
Speaker 1: keep a similar format though, Danny on the fifth hour
Speaker 1: practice so on this podcast. Uh, and you can add
Speaker 1: anything you want here, any stories you have. I know
Speaker 1: you just got back a few days ago from from Hawaii.
Speaker 1: I'm sure to travel because i've heard my wife. My
Speaker 1: wife wanted to go to Hawaii, and I've heard it
Speaker 1: was not there's a lot of restrictions traveling to Hawaii.
Speaker 1: But I will have Tarayaki Madness. That is an original story.
Speaker 1: You will only here in the fifth hour, a little Shakespeare,
Speaker 1: a little unexpected Shakespeare, and whatever else pops up here
Speaker 1: on the fifth But I'm gonna start with the Tarayaki
Speaker 1: madness and then we'll get to Danny Gee's travel log,
Speaker 1: but the life of Mallard, which we discuss on this
Speaker 1: podcast every Saturday. So I don't really live in interesting life.
Speaker 1: For some reason, people seem to like me just telling
Speaker 1: random stories about dumb stuff that happens to me. Um.
Speaker 1: So I had a few things happened this week that
Speaker 1: I have not shared radio for whatever reason, didn't have
Speaker 1: time for it. And so the other day I was
Speaker 1: doing some grocery shopping and you know, I picked my meal.
Speaker 1: I don't eat that much. I fast. I'm on this
Speaker 1: inter minute fasting diet. But it was one of the
Speaker 1: days I ate, and so I decided I wanted to
Speaker 1: have I mean cooking at home. Now the kitchen's done
Speaker 1: at the house I'm living, so I had, I said,
Speaker 1: I want taryak chicken and rice. Now the Mallard palette.
Speaker 1: This is as close as I get the healthy Danny.
Speaker 1: So around seven am, I decide, I'm gonna go to
Speaker 1: the grocery store. I'm gonna buy all the ingredients to
Speaker 1: make karaoke chicken and like the slope. And so I
Speaker 1: go on a mission and the mission calls for me
Speaker 1: to buy chicken and to buy taryaki sauce. And rice.
Speaker 1: You know. That's basically it's very simple. And uh so
Speaker 1: I I don't have a preferred brand of karyaki sauce.
Speaker 1: So what I did was I spent about ten minutes
Speaker 1: taking bottles of tarayaki sauce off the off the shelf,
Speaker 1: trying to find the perfect aryaki sauce. And I did
Speaker 1: not want to f this up. Looking at the sugar
Speaker 1: content on the back. Oh god, no, I don't care
Speaker 1: about that. Figure I cook it, most of that burns out.
Speaker 1: I think, I don't know, but I'm reading, and then
Speaker 1: I'm in my head, I'm thinking, well, some of the
Speaker 1: some of the taryaki sauce is a little low, so
Speaker 1: that means it's popular, So maybe I should get some
Speaker 1: of that because that's popular. But then well maybe some
Speaker 1: of this other stuff people have been tried, and maybe
Speaker 1: that's good taryaki and people are missing out on it.
Speaker 1: So anyway, I'm looking. I'm really dumb, hey minutes looking
Speaker 1: for taryaki sauce at least. Uh and and so I
Speaker 1: finally find something that looks good, and I'm like, all right,
Speaker 1: this is great. I found found my magic sauce. Now
Speaker 1: I hate the fact in California. You can't get a
Speaker 1: grocery bag at the checkout. You have to pay for it,
Speaker 1: And so I don't pay for it, Danny, I do
Speaker 1: is I bringing the bag from home? And I'm like,
Speaker 1: going to pay the tax to get a plastic bag
Speaker 1: at the grocery store. It's ridiculous. So I refused to pay.
Speaker 1: So I brought my own cloth bag. So again, after
Speaker 1: about what seemed to me like thirty minutes but probably
Speaker 1: was only ten, I put the tarayaki sauce in the bag.
Speaker 1: It was my Eureka moment. And then I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I found the sauce. This is great. I'm right in
Speaker 1: my goldilocks z And it was honey spicy tarayaki. Danny,
Speaker 1: that sounds good, doesn't It does sound good? Yeah. So
Speaker 1: then I put the bottom in the bag and I'm
Speaker 1: moving on to now get the rice. Now the rice
Speaker 1: and the chicken. The next thing up is the rice.
Speaker 1: So since I moved, I now go to a different store,
Speaker 1: so I don't know where it is. And at the
Speaker 1: old place where I used to live, I knew where
Speaker 1: everything was, and so I'm educating myself. So as I'm
Speaker 1: walking around the gross store, and if you ever gone
Speaker 1: to the store in the morning, they're still putting stuff
Speaker 1: on the shelves. You know, it's there's a lot of
Speaker 1: things going on, and so bam, just like that, I
Speaker 1: end up hitting, uh, the side of the aisle and
Speaker 1: somehow I dropped the bag. I dropped the bag they're
Speaker 1: at bumping into the corner of the aisle in my haste.
Speaker 1: And I told you it was a cloth bag. Well,
Speaker 1: it turns out the taryaki sauce I didn't realize this
Speaker 1: at the time, was in a glass container. Yeah, kaboom,
Speaker 1: you pulled a Jared Goff. Yeah exactly, I pulled a
Speaker 1: bumb bug on the rug um. So the club bag,
Speaker 1: I hear the I hear the glass break, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh boy, Now, fortunately it was contained to the bag.
Speaker 1: So they're they're all the broken glass and the delicious
Speaker 1: spicy honey tarayaki sauces right there in the bag. So
Speaker 1: then I'm at the point, well what do I do here.
Speaker 1: I can't just walk out of the store because I
Speaker 1: didn't pay for it. I don't really want to pay
Speaker 1: for it because it's broken taryaki sauce, And so I
Speaker 1: made the walk of shame. Danny over to one of
Speaker 1: the employees there at the grocery store, and this woman
Speaker 1: was very nice. I think she felt pity on me
Speaker 1: because I'm such a loser. And I told her what happened,
Speaker 1: and she said, okay, And I was a spill on
Speaker 1: Aisle three, but there was no spill. It was in
Speaker 1: the bag. And so I gave her the ba the
Speaker 1: bag and she took all the glass out, gave me
Speaker 1: back the bag, and I went on my way. And
Speaker 1: I had to I had to get a grocery cart
Speaker 1: because I didn't want to take I still didn't want
Speaker 1: to get a bag. So what I did I put
Speaker 1: everything in the grocery cart Danny and then and then
Speaker 1: moved moved out of the store, bought everything and that
Speaker 1: was it. So I had a tough time getting tarayaki sauce.
Speaker 1: Who screws up getting taryaki sauce? Seriously? Now, let me
Speaker 1: ask you would a younger Mallard you had your wheels
Speaker 1: back in the day, would you have ran out of
Speaker 1: the store. You know, I did debate running out of
Speaker 1: the store. I did consider just leaving, like one are
Speaker 1: the odds that anything's gonna happen? And I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, just in case I don't, and it was
Speaker 1: really I didn't. I was gonna get caught. But my thought,
Speaker 1: Danny was, wait a minute here, I don't want to
Speaker 1: think about this for the next, like the next two days. Well,
Speaker 1: maybe somebody's gonna come knocking on my door because I
Speaker 1: broke a bottle of taryaki sauce and walked out of
Speaker 1: the grocery. How embarrassing would that be? Can you imagine? Sorry,
Speaker 1: we've decided to press charge, although in California I don't
Speaker 1: think they press charges on anything these days, but but
Speaker 1: but still, so that was my my Terrioca story. So
Speaker 1: you got back, why Danny, Now, that's much better than
Speaker 1: me going to buy teryaki sauce? And how many days
Speaker 1: were you there? Give me that. I want all the
Speaker 1: details because I've heard horror stories of traveling during the
Speaker 1: Even though COVID's winding down, it's not winding down in
Speaker 1: many states, including Hawaii. So what was that like? Yeah,
Speaker 1: at first I gotta shout out my Tinder rowning because
Speaker 1: she did the leg work. She downloaded the applications that
Speaker 1: you have to fill out, and then they give you
Speaker 1: like a QR code That code is important because then
Speaker 1: they need your vaccination cards and you gotta take a
Speaker 1: picture of the front and the back of it and
Speaker 1: enter it into the website for Hawaii and and and
Speaker 1: then this code you have to present at the airport
Speaker 1: along with your reservation to go. And it's it's you know,
Speaker 1: it is jumping through hoops, but in the end it's
Speaker 1: worth it because they give you a clearance bracelet. It's
Speaker 1: almost like you're going to a club, like waiting to
Speaker 1: get into the club, which was actually a couple of
Speaker 1: kids kicking us in the back of our airplane seats.
Speaker 1: Um it was. It was a long flight there, and
Speaker 1: it was packed going to Maui, but it was it
Speaker 1: was well worth the trouble. Um once we got there
Speaker 1: and landed, obviously, you feel that nice, warm, humid weather.
Speaker 1: You're right in the face. As soon as you step
Speaker 1: out of the airport. You're like, wow, I'm somewhere tropical
Speaker 1: all of a sudden. And then it used to be
Speaker 1: that they would give you Mustangs there in Hawaii. You
Speaker 1: remember that every rental car was a Mustang or a Jeep.
Speaker 1: Now it's just a fleet of Camaros. For some reason,
Speaker 1: Camaros they've moved up to the camaro in that Now.
Speaker 1: I've never been to Maui, so what's what's it like?
Speaker 1: I've been to and I have been to Kauai. I
Speaker 1: usually go to Kauaii the Garden Islands. Not much. There's
Speaker 1: like forty miles of roads in Kauai. That's it. But Maui,
Speaker 1: I've heard people that have been there said it's kind
Speaker 1: of like much nicer Orange County, where it's like beaches
Speaker 1: everywhere and all that way. How would you describe Maui?
Speaker 1: West Maui is super beautiful and yeah, pictures San Clemente
Speaker 1: without all of the buildings all up and down the
Speaker 1: beaches stacked all the way to the inland. They've done
Speaker 1: a really good job there in Maui. Over the past
Speaker 1: fifty years. They've had an explosion there with the resorts
Speaker 1: and everything, but they've been very strategic with where they
Speaker 1: put the buildings so that you still get all the
Speaker 1: beautiful views. And the water is pristine, man. I mean
Speaker 1: when you step into that water, it is so warm
Speaker 1: and you could see your feet and obviously, you know,
Speaker 1: we were lucky here on the West coast to have
Speaker 1: the Pacific Ocean, but you're you're not looking at your
Speaker 1: feet there in that water. No. In fact, I following
Speaker 1: up on that, Danny, I refused to go in the ocean.
Speaker 1: I have an anti ocean unless I can see my
Speaker 1: feet because I was spoiled like you. I've been to
Speaker 1: Hawaii a few times and I will not go now.
Speaker 1: I've heard in Mexico there's places in me so you
Speaker 1: can see your feet, and so maybe by the water there,
Speaker 1: but in the West coast here in California, the water
Speaker 1: is thick and kind of murky and you can't you
Speaker 1: can't see me. But that is awesome. And did you
Speaker 1: go snorkeling at all? Did you see any seat turtles
Speaker 1: or any of that stuff. We did, so it's the
Speaker 1: first time I've ever been snorkeling, which was really cool.
Speaker 1: And we went out to what was a volcanic rock.
Speaker 1: It's not an active volcano, although that would have made
Speaker 1: it more exciting. Um and the boat pulls up and
Speaker 1: actually before we got to that rock, there was just
Speaker 1: the middle of the ocean where the dude was like, Okay, look,
Speaker 1: we know a spot where there's lots of sea turtles
Speaker 1: and we're gonna take you there first. So they give
Speaker 1: you the gear and you are literally just in the
Speaker 1: middle of the ocean. And I'm not gonna lie, you know,
Speaker 1: after doing all of the animal thunderdome stories I've done
Speaker 1: over the years, I'm like, well, wouldn't this be ironic
Speaker 1: if I get taken out in the middle of the
Speaker 1: ocean like some sort of sea creature. Um, So they
Speaker 1: give you like a floaty some of the diving gear.
Speaker 1: Looking down into the reef, there were tons of these
Speaker 1: turtles just swimming. And these turtles, I mean, obviously you're
Speaker 1: in their territory. They don't care that the humans are there.
Speaker 1: As long as you're not splashing hard and making lots
Speaker 1: of noise, they swim right up to you. So we
Speaker 1: literally were looking at these turtles like right in front
Speaker 1: of us, which was really crazy. And the water was
Speaker 1: so salty that you float super easy. So even if
Speaker 1: you're big guys like us, you're still just there's really
Speaker 1: no way to sink. Yeah. The nicest place I've ever
Speaker 1: been water wise was the Napolyi coast of Oahu. Was unbelievable.
Speaker 1: It's like the side there's nobody living there, It's just
Speaker 1: all rocks and ocean, and they filmed a bunch of
Speaker 1: TV shows and movies on that side, because it's just
Speaker 1: it's it's like you're out in the middle of nowhere
Speaker 1: and it's beautiful, bright blue water. It's really, really, really awesome.
Speaker 1: How is the food? My only complaint with Hawaii is
Speaker 1: the food's terrible. It's not big guy friendly food. I
Speaker 1: had the worst Asian meal I've ever had there, which
Speaker 1: is odd. I was confused by they everything was fried.
Speaker 1: Normally things fried are good, but I couldn't really make
Speaker 1: out what it was it was. It was terrible whatever.
Speaker 1: I went to this Chinese restaurant I don't remember the
Speaker 1: name of it's probably gone now. There was only one
Speaker 1: restaurant that I liked. It was an Italian restaurant. It
Speaker 1: was pretty good. But how how was the food in Hawaii?
Speaker 1: I would say that you probably should stay close to
Speaker 1: your resort. The restaurants at the resort, although they're overpriced,
Speaker 1: it's worth it. That's why you save up to go
Speaker 1: on vacation. Um. But we had man there's a place
Speaker 1: called the Monkey Pod restaurant five stars. It was expensive,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't one of the more expensive ones that
Speaker 1: we saw. The appetizers, the flavors, the drinks pretty amazing.
Speaker 1: And then we were at the West End because we
Speaker 1: cashed in all of our Marriott points. The restaurants they
Speaker 1: had right there at the resort were just unbelievable. So yeah,
Speaker 1: we really got lucky with the food on on the trip.
Speaker 1: So you weren't eating at Mickey D's. You were not
Speaker 1: eating there was you know, when they took us out.
Speaker 1: And by the way, we also saw some whales, which
Speaker 1: was pretty cool. Through the whale watching and there wasn't
Speaker 1: people looking at me through binoculars. We saw some humpbacks
Speaker 1: and then the boat docked and they gave us sandwiches
Speaker 1: and acts of doritos and we're like, okay, well, you
Speaker 1: know whatever, we're out here on the water. We were
Speaker 1: so hungry though from all the snorkeling. Even those generic
Speaker 1: sandwiches tasted amazing. So yeah, I mean we avoided, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, the tourist traps, except for right there at
Speaker 1: the resort where you're stuck at the trap. So what
Speaker 1: are you gonna do, right, as long as you can
Speaker 1: park your car, you know, you got a budget. The
Speaker 1: fact that they're gonna just rape you with that daily
Speaker 1: fee to park your car, and let's just eat here
Speaker 1: at the resort. Let's pretend like we're very, very wealthy
Speaker 1: for a few days, and then when we get back
Speaker 1: to the main land, then we'll go to the value menu.
Speaker 1: Well that's a smart, that's a smart normally. Well, they
Speaker 1: do say that the best spice is is hunger, right,
Speaker 1: that everything that takes everything says better when youre hungry.
Speaker 1: But yeah, that the parking fees of the hotels, Oh
Speaker 1: what a ridiculous I mean, just build it into the
Speaker 1: cost of who's going. How many people are going to
Speaker 1: Hawaii and not renting cars? I mean maybe that happens
Speaker 1: a lot. I don't I don't know the numbers on that,
Speaker 1: but most people I would think, you're going on vacation,
Speaker 1: you save up, as you said, for vacation, You're gonna
Speaker 1: rent a car so you can drive around. It's convenient. Now,
Speaker 1: is there a Costco in Maui? Because then there is
Speaker 1: all right, because uh in Waho there or not a
Speaker 1: wah who Kawaii there's one? And I did eat at
Speaker 1: Costco several times because the meals are so outrady. I
Speaker 1: was like, you know, I'm a I'm a tight water.
Speaker 1: I was like I'll like and the Costco had views
Speaker 1: of like beautiful green mountains. It was amazing, like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you eating free samples while you have a view. That
Speaker 1: is a vacation in itself. That's dream territory. Now. I
Speaker 1: had heard that when you go to Hawaii they you
Speaker 1: have to give your itinerary where you're going to be
Speaker 1: every day. Is that? Is that still a thing or
Speaker 1: did you not have to do that? No, we didn't
Speaker 1: have to do that, but we did have to keep
Speaker 1: filling out these questionnaires about if we were feeling well.
Speaker 1: They want to make sure you have no symptoms, and
Speaker 1: they were very strict about your mask being on. In fact,
Speaker 1: a couple of times we went into those ABC stores. Yeah,
Speaker 1: for chips and water and stuff like that. I got
Speaker 1: yelled at several times because of my mask wasn't up
Speaker 1: over my nose. Uh. It felt very Disneyland like pre
Speaker 1: lowering their restrictions down. We got yelled at and chase
Speaker 1: there at the park because the mask wasn't up over
Speaker 1: our nose completely and it's like a school teacher running
Speaker 1: after you scolding you. We caught that on several occasions there.
Speaker 1: So they're very very strict about the masks being fully
Speaker 1: over your dome. Yeah, I'll probably wait until they didn't
Speaker 1: knock off that nonsense. I've read too many studies. We
Speaker 1: had John Zigler on the podcast couple of weeks ago,
Speaker 1: and he pointed out the data indicates that the mask
Speaker 1: doesn't do much of anything, that it is more for.
Speaker 1: It's like mask theater, and he's given many examples on
Speaker 1: has and I've read other people that have studied it
Speaker 1: and looked at the actual science. You're supposed to follow
Speaker 1: the science, and I know it makes people feel good
Speaker 1: that you wear the mask, but uh, if you know,
Speaker 1: if you can smell the cigarette smoke of somebody smoking
Speaker 1: near you, chances are stuff is gonna get in there.
Speaker 1: And they've improven that there's really no different effect in
Speaker 1: southern California, as John pointed out, in Orange County where
Speaker 1: they don't have strict mask mandates, and Los Angeles, there
Speaker 1: is no real difference between those that are wearing masks
Speaker 1: and those people. Don't like to hear that, but that's
Speaker 1: the reality. A right, Um, moving on this Shakespeare story,
Speaker 1: I want to tell this, so this is something that
Speaker 1: happened and into the dropping of the honey Spicy Karayaki Sauce.
Speaker 1: So the past week I had an awkward moment. I'm
Speaker 1: doing the show. I get a d M from Marcel
Speaker 1: in Brooklyn. First of all, that's odd because Marcel never
Speaker 1: sends me d M and I normally I don't even
Speaker 1: check during the show. I normally just I don't want
Speaker 1: to deal with that bull crap, and I don't I
Speaker 1: don't have me to do it. However, this one caught
Speaker 1: my attention. I just happened. It happened come in at
Speaker 1: the right time, and I was looking at my direct messages,
Speaker 1: and so Marcel told me, he said call me. It
Speaker 1: was very upset about something that Blair in Maine had
Speaker 1: done or something like that. And so I wrote back,
Speaker 1: I said, Marseille, I am doing the show. I can't.
Speaker 1: I can't call you back. And then so he wanted
Speaker 1: me to call him, and he said again, he said
Speaker 1: call me, So I said, and I said, but I
Speaker 1: don't have your number. I can't. I can't guess. I
Speaker 1: probably could guess your number, it would take a long time.
Speaker 1: So Marcella actually sent me his phone number on direct message.
Speaker 1: Now I had no intention of actually calling him. I
Speaker 1: just thought, you know, i'd be nice. And so at
Speaker 1: that point he gives me his number and he wants
Speaker 1: me to come. So I'm debating in my head, like
Speaker 1: do I call this guy or not? And much like
Speaker 1: Shakespeare was to call or not to call? Right into
Speaker 1: the Shakespeare line and uh So, as you know, I've
Speaker 1: had some bad experiences with Doc Mike from Chicago, who
Speaker 1: still calls me, called me for twenty years. I gave
Speaker 1: him my number he was going to jail. I said
Speaker 1: call me when you get out, that's it, and don't
Speaker 1: call me after that. And he's called me every week,
Speaker 1: sometimes three or four times a week, sometimes even more
Speaker 1: than that. So I was like, all right, I know
Speaker 1: what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna do the Star sixty seven.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna block my number, but I'm gonna call Marcella
Speaker 1: because I said I would call him. So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I'm gonna Star sixty seven keep him a call. So
Speaker 1: the show ends and I decided, you know, flip the
Speaker 1: old coin. In my head, I'm like, all right, let's
Speaker 1: do it. Here we go, we're on, and call Marcella.
Speaker 1: So I work up the courage and I dial the number.
Speaker 1: It's a Brooklyn number. I looked it up online to
Speaker 1: make sure it was legit. It was Brooklyn number and
Speaker 1: ring ring ring, ring, wing wing wing wing. Answer. I
Speaker 1: hear a cloud and not a cloud, A clear, a clear,
Speaker 1: well spoken I would voice hello, and I'm thinking more
Speaker 1: of that does not sound like Marcel. Marcell doesn't sound
Speaker 1: anything like that. He's not loud, he's not clear, he
Speaker 1: doesn't say hello the way that anyway, So it doesn't
Speaker 1: sound like Marcell. So I then have a character. I
Speaker 1: knew it. Yeah, yeah, exactly. He's on the payroll. So
Speaker 1: I I had a decision to make game. Do I
Speaker 1: hang up at that point and just pretend it didn't happen,
Speaker 1: or do I engage whoever this person is. So for
Speaker 1: some reason I decided to engage. I should have just
Speaker 1: hung up because there's nothing they could attract me down.
Speaker 1: It was an unlisted that blocked my number, So I say,
Speaker 1: it's oursel. They're thinking that maybe this is somebody that
Speaker 1: lives with Marcel in the projects of Brooklyn. The voice
Speaker 1: on the other side, very clear, spoken, well, punctuation great.
Speaker 1: All that says no, he does not live here, So like,
Speaker 1: oh crap, you know, Marcel gave me the wrong number.
Speaker 1: This is terrible, and then he asked who is this
Speaker 1: and then I explained, I was trying to get a
Speaker 1: hold of Marcel, you know, he's a caller to my
Speaker 1: radio show. And this guy gave me the number, and
Speaker 1: I apologize, and then the guy stops me said, wait
Speaker 1: a minute, don't hang up, don't hang up. He says,
Speaker 1: this is my this is so as he gave his
Speaker 1: name and I didn't recognize it. And then I said, wait,
Speaker 1: my uncle Dynamite, which is Marcelle's. Yeah, he says, I'm
Speaker 1: Uncle Dynamite, and it was Uncle Dynamite, the famous Uncle Dynamite.
Speaker 1: And so I talked to him on the phone for
Speaker 1: a couple of minutes and he's like very concerned. He's like,
Speaker 1: was Marcell causing your problems? What's going on here? You
Speaker 1: know that he's taking yeah exactly. So you know, he
Speaker 1: was like, no, Marcell's you know, he's I said, he's fine.
Speaker 1: He's the character on the show. We have fun with him,
Speaker 1: and he has fun on the show. And uh, he says, okay,
Speaker 1: just let me know if there's any problems with Marcel,
Speaker 1: right like that. So it was very brief and we
Speaker 1: I said, have a good Thanksgiving whatever, and he hung
Speaker 1: up and then that's it. So then I messaged Marcella,
Speaker 1: I'm hate Marcelle. What the heck you gave me Uncle
Speaker 1: Dynamites something? You didn't give me your number? What do
Speaker 1: you expect me to call you? You gave me Uncle
Speaker 1: dynamites him. Then he writes back in a very angry
Speaker 1: like for Marcella's saying, do not call Uncle Dynamite. Do
Speaker 1: not call Uncle Dynamite. I wrote back, I said, too late, Marcel,
Speaker 1: too late, too late. Why did he give you the number? Then? Exactly, Well,
Speaker 1: you know, Marcel's got a few issues, and one of
Speaker 1: his issues, Danny is he I don't think he keeps
Speaker 1: really good track of numbers, but he does know the
Speaker 1: number to call into Fox Sports Radio. He's memorized that
Speaker 1: he gets that one right all the time. I remember
Speaker 1: we tried. There was a listener. I think it might
Speaker 1: have been Tammy and Montesa. Somebody wanted to send him
Speaker 1: a gift, a care package because he has a terrible diet.
Speaker 1: And so Cooper Loop was trying to get Marcel's address.
Speaker 1: That's a hard get, Dan, That's that's a hard get.
Speaker 1: And finally he trackeded that and we learned Marcel does
Speaker 1: not like to leave his apartment in Brooklyn to get
Speaker 1: the mail, so that became another issue. We had to
Speaker 1: explain to Marcel, Hey, there's like food waiting for you,
Speaker 1: but you can't. It's gonna go bad if you don't
Speaker 1: get so that that was the whole thing. Uh, interesting times,
Speaker 1: interesting times, not to love them. Militia, man, I missed
Speaker 1: the militia. You know, after all these years, I still
Speaker 1: get tons of direct messages and have longstanding friendships with
Speaker 1: so many. Your audience definitely is the most fun out
Speaker 1: of any radio show in the country. Thank you, Danny.
Speaker 1: Be prepared because I did not announce this before the
Speaker 1: mail bag. We're gonna the mailbag on Sunday's podcast, but
Speaker 1: you will be peppered questions. You might have to bring
Speaker 1: back Tenderni tips. I know you are now you found
Speaker 1: the Queen Tenderroni at this moment, but you still might
Speaker 1: have to give about advice. You have a lifetime of
Speaker 1: experience in the the war zone that is dating. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I met her online. The proof is in the pudding. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and I met my wife online, but a long time ago.
Speaker 1: And I I've been out of the game for over
Speaker 1: a decade now, so I've lost my I've lost my way.
Speaker 1: I thought I ever had I didn't have any when
Speaker 1: you had to do a dial up connection. Yes see,
Speaker 1: I did die a o L I had my I
Speaker 1: was an aight old chat back in the back in then,
Speaker 1: you know, I stumbled into when I called Uncle Dynamite.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize it was called Uncle Dynamite, but and
Speaker 1: he said hello, and then I said hello, and I
Speaker 1: was like, why do we say hello? I stumbled down
Speaker 1: a rabbit hole on do you know the story? The
Speaker 1: backstory of Hello, Danny? Do you know why we say hello? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't, but it's kind of interesting because I was
Speaker 1: wondering about the whole Aloha thing, because obviously I heard
Speaker 1: that for a few days NonStop, as it's hello and
Speaker 1: goodbye and mahallow m. That's the extent of my Hawaiian
Speaker 1: and those ABC stores. I've seen him in Vegas, but
Speaker 1: that's it. I've seen in Vegas and Hawaii, and that
Speaker 1: seems to be the number one travel destination for people
Speaker 1: in Hawaii. They love going to Vegas, love the get
Speaker 1: and listening to the radio in veidu in in Hawaii.
Speaker 1: Like a lot of the commercials like travel packages to
Speaker 1: go to Vegas at least years ago. When I was there,
Speaker 1: it's like a big to do. Then the locals were
Speaker 1: commenting on my raiders gear NonStop and showing me pictures
Speaker 1: of a special Raider paint job that one of the
Speaker 1: valet guys had on his truck. I heard more than
Speaker 1: uh five times from locals. They're saying, I can't wait
Speaker 1: to get to the stadium. So you're right, they love
Speaker 1: Las Vegas with a passion, and now that there's pro
Speaker 1: football there. Yeah. So when you're in Hawaii, you can
Speaker 1: either go back to the States, which is a five
Speaker 1: hour fight, or you can go to Guam. How far
Speaker 1: away is Guam from Hawaii. It's got to be at
Speaker 1: least another three hours, I would think, right. I know
Speaker 1: when I when I've tried with to Hawaii that people
Speaker 1: stop and on the way to Guam. You'll stop off
Speaker 1: and Honolulu or something like that for a few hours
Speaker 1: and then keep going to Guam. So it can't be
Speaker 1: that long long a flight. Looking every time I go
Speaker 1: to Hawaii, I see the Guam and I think of
Speaker 1: Vic the brick you've gotta get on this podcast. At
Speaker 1: some point. Vic works when we normally record the podcast,
Speaker 1: or sleeps. But I've known Vic for years. But Vic
Speaker 1: got his start Victor Brick and legend in Guam. He's
Speaker 1: a waiter in Guam. It's one of the great he's
Speaker 1: told me the story before. It's a great story. Working
Speaker 1: a waiter. He didn't really know what he wanted to
Speaker 1: do after school. And a guy that came in that
Speaker 1: owned like I think, one of the radio stations, and
Speaker 1: somehow he ended up getting offered a job. And you
Speaker 1: guys been in radio and television for forty fifty years
Speaker 1: or whatever. It's crazy. Flight. By the way, eight hours
Speaker 1: are you sing from from Hawaii? It's eight hours to Guam. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's crazy. Uh So as far as the Hello thing,
Speaker 1: I spent a minute long investigation minutes long here investigation
Speaker 1: and just the facts. I needed an answer. So here's
Speaker 1: what I found, Danny, according to my internet research. Minutes
Speaker 1: long investigation. Now, Alexander Graham Bell, who is credited with
Speaker 1: inventing the phone all those some debate whether that actually happened.
Speaker 1: He had suggested that we should say ahoy when we
Speaker 1: answer the phone, ahoy, And during the sevente century in America,
Speaker 1: pilgrims would typically say good Morrow instead of hello or
Speaker 1: how now. That's weird. That sounds like something Marcel would say,
Speaker 1: how now? Or how do you fare? Or what year?
Speaker 1: They didn't say hi and say how are you any
Speaker 1: of that stuff. But Alexander Graham Bell wanted ahoy, which
Speaker 1: is a maritime greeting. We've all seen pirate movies, right,
Speaker 1: AHOI maybe right, it's a classic line. I kind of
Speaker 1: like that, ahoy. I might have to do that. I
Speaker 1: might have to when I answered the whone, Now, AHOI
Speaker 1: would I be a nerd or cool? Which would I be? Danny?
Speaker 1: I think you know the answer to that, all right,
Speaker 1: but I was hoping maybe you'd you'd give me what
Speaker 1: the answer I wanted. Anyway, So it was Thomas Edison
Speaker 1: who equipped the first telephone exchanges. Now originally when Alexander
Speaker 1: I didn't know this until I fell down this rabbit hole.
Speaker 1: So when Alexander Graham Bell came up with the telephone,
Speaker 1: when he was the original telephone, it was a direct
Speaker 1: hard line connection, so there was no need to ring
Speaker 1: because the line was always open, and so you don't
Speaker 1: need to say hello, you just talked down the line
Speaker 1: you need to. But it was Thomas Edison who in
Speaker 1: eighteen seventies seven, during an experience experiment, he shouted the
Speaker 1: first audio ever said into what became the telephone. Hellou
Speaker 1: or hallu was what he said, hallou h A L
Speaker 1: l O hallou, And that term was used in the
Speaker 1: eighteen seventies for inciting dogs on a hunt. So if
Speaker 1: you wanted to I guess the dogs to hunt, you
Speaker 1: said hello and they got in hunting. Period, the legend
Speaker 1: was born that hallou turned into Hello, Hello, and that
Speaker 1: turned out to be the the way that But just
Speaker 1: think if it had been ahoy, we'd have instead of Hello, kitty,
Speaker 1: we'd have Halloi Kitty doesn't sound as good? Or what
Speaker 1: are some other Hello products we've had? There's the Adele song, right,
Speaker 1: the Adele song that Lionel Richie's famous song. And also
Speaker 1: it made me think of that movie I just looked
Speaker 1: it up. Is from Crazy People. Remember that old dadly
Speaker 1: Moore movie with Daryl Hannah. You know I probably did
Speaker 1: see that. That's right in my wheelhouse for movies when
Speaker 1: I did see a lot of movies. So I'm gonna
Speaker 1: say that I did see that YouTube poemork the Hello song.
Speaker 1: There was a crazy guy got on the piano and
Speaker 1: he did a Hello song. Is that okay? All right?
Speaker 1: I have to check it. I'll go on YouTube when
Speaker 1: the podcast is done, and I will I will check
Speaker 1: it out. Now speaking of YouTube, Danny, as a fellow
Speaker 1: radio guy yourself who started even younger than me, we
Speaker 1: learned that on the podcast a couple of weeks ago
Speaker 1: before you were part of the podcast, when you were
Speaker 1: just hanging out schmoozing with us. So I recommend anybody
Speaker 1: that loves radio, and we have a lot of people
Speaker 1: that are p ones Danny, that love radio, talk radio,
Speaker 1: any kind of radio. And we're a couple of old
Speaker 1: radio guys, nerds whatever. The greatest piece of television on
Speaker 1: radio w k RP and Cincinnati that's we Drop. Yes, Yes,
Speaker 1: this is the weekend to go back and watch the
Speaker 1: Turkey drop on too. There's like a four minute clip
Speaker 1: from the nineteen seventies eighties w KRP man I thought
Speaker 1: they could fly uh less Nestman less Nestman the newsman
Speaker 1: covering the turkey promotion at the mall and uh that
Speaker 1: was outstanding And d J DR Johnny Fever back in
Speaker 1: the studio and all of that Venus fly Trap those Uh,
Speaker 1: I mean, we're doing old guy podcasting here, Danny. But
Speaker 1: that show. Yeah. I grew up watching reruns of that
Speaker 1: show and was just mesmerized by the radio equipment and
Speaker 1: the fact they could push one button and walk away
Speaker 1: for five minutes and then come back and do a
Speaker 1: live break on the mic anytime they felt like it.
Speaker 1: And then once in a while you'd see him like
Speaker 1: you up a wreck. Heard the dynamics that took place
Speaker 1: inside the sales office in the front desk, and everything
Speaker 1: that happened with that radio station. It did make a
Speaker 1: lot of people curious about broadcasting until this day. That
Speaker 1: is definitely the show when it comes to radio stations.
Speaker 1: Absolutely if if you have, I promise you were. If
Speaker 1: you've not seen it before, somehow you're like missed it.
Speaker 1: Check it out. Even if you've seen it before the
Speaker 1: turkey drop w k RP typing into YouTube and you
Speaker 1: will You'll love it. I think you'll love it. And
Speaker 1: the great thing about all my years in radio now
Speaker 1: pretty much everywhere I've worked there's a version of the
Speaker 1: character on the show. Like they really nailed it like
Speaker 1: there's there's the the guy that runs the station, Mr Carlson,
Speaker 1: who's there's always that Mr. Carlson type character. Uh, there's
Speaker 1: the Johnny Fever, doctor DJ veteran radio guy kind of
Speaker 1: have been around less nestman, the person that takes things
Speaker 1: way too seriously. Like all of those things, all of
Speaker 1: those things are accurate even to this day. That they
Speaker 1: totally got that part right. It was great. Yeah. Shout
Speaker 1: out to Scott Mahalak, who was my general manager slash
Speaker 1: program director of k a t M Modesto Stockton, Sacramento
Speaker 1: in the mid nineties. I was a kid and was
Speaker 1: one of my first radio stations and he was like
Speaker 1: a real life character, like one of those guys on
Speaker 1: that TV show because instead of getting a turkey sound
Speaker 1: effect for the station, he brought in on a rope
Speaker 1: a live turkey to the radio station and he kept
Speaker 1: it on the patio right outside of the conference room.
Speaker 1: There was a closed off little patio where some of
Speaker 1: the broadcasters would go smoke their cigarettes, and we had
Speaker 1: a turkey tied up out there for a week and
Speaker 1: they would parade it into the studio once a shift
Speaker 1: and let it gobble live on one of the microphones. Oh,
Speaker 1: that's outstanding. That is wonderful. I've never done I've never
Speaker 1: done a live turkey. I don't think I've ever had
Speaker 1: Parker the snow dog. That's as deep as we when
Speaker 1: you were there for that, I think when he came in,
Speaker 1: that was the only I think the only animal. We
Speaker 1: used to have Auto the drinking dog, but not in studio.
Speaker 1: The craziest thing I've done, I had an eating contest
Speaker 1: years ago on the weekend show. We had Major League
Speaker 1: eating sent in this guy, big Sexy, who actually became
Speaker 1: a radio guy. He became a radio guy after that.
Speaker 1: And he came in and I thought, and we had
Speaker 1: paramedics there in case he choked on one of the dogs.
Speaker 1: We had a representative to keep time, you know, track
Speaker 1: of the time. Was crazy. It was so ridiculous. But
Speaker 1: I've never had a live turkey. That's that's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: The other thing about Thanksgiving we think about it. For me,
Speaker 1: it's w k RP the turkey drop. But every every
Speaker 1: music guy I've ever talked to, not that I know
Speaker 1: many in radio Thanksgiving Weekend, if you have a classic
Speaker 1: rock format, you know what song always gets played Thanksgiving weekend, Danny.
Speaker 1: You know it's in. Let me see here now it's
Speaker 1: I'm putting on the spot here it's in. If I
Speaker 1: give you the time of the song, I think you'll
Speaker 1: get it right. It's an eighteen minutes song something Alice's
Speaker 1: Something Something. Uh. It's an old song from the nineteen
Speaker 1: sixties about these guys got arrested on Thanksgiving because something
Speaker 1: you did on Thanksgiving and it's Alice's. It's on YouTube
Speaker 1: all so I've had guys say, oh yeah, we play
Speaker 1: that every Thanksgiving. It's like a tradition. Thanksgiving night will
Speaker 1: play the song, which has to be a DJ's friend.
Speaker 1: Now everything is automated, but the old days, you actually
Speaker 1: had to play the music, and so you had to
Speaker 1: be where you're supposed to be to play the music.
Speaker 1: Now everything's kind of it's a lot easier for a
Speaker 1: lot of people to do it. But in the old
Speaker 1: days to have an eighteen minute song, Danny. I worked
Speaker 1: out a rock station as a kid, and I would
Speaker 1: play November Rain from Guns and Roses. One of my
Speaker 1: first girlfriends would come to the radio station. We would
Speaker 1: make out by her car as and she would have
Speaker 1: the station on in her car, so I could hear
Speaker 1: and monitor what was happening, and we'd be you know,
Speaker 1: uh doing a Bible study out in the parking lot,
Speaker 1: and I would run in when I knew it was
Speaker 1: the last thirty seconds of the song. So yeah, back
Speaker 1: back in my day, it was guns and Roses. November Rain.
Speaker 1: That was the long song to play. My program director
Speaker 1: when he would have his meetings with us about what
Speaker 1: we were doing on the air, he would tell me,
Speaker 1: and don't think I haven't noticed how you play November
Speaker 1: Rain every single night. That's great. When I when I
Speaker 1: was brief d at a smooth jazz station, there was
Speaker 1: a Brantford Marsalis song that was really long and that
Speaker 1: was always we had to go to the bathroom. That
Speaker 1: would be the song that we think that that just
Speaker 1: I just looked it up here Alice. His restaurant is
Speaker 1: in the name of the song, so I guess you
Speaker 1: haven't heard that. But it's r Low Guthrie. It's an
Speaker 1: old song from the sixties. It's like eighteen minutes, eighteen
Speaker 1: miss It's like folk I'm gonna gets played on classic
Speaker 1: rock stations. So that's another check out over the weekend.
Speaker 1: The speaking of checking out, I think we are going
Speaker 1: to check out on these Saturday podcasts. Uh. You can
Speaker 1: email us if you want the email that I used
Speaker 1: for this podcast. If you want to send a question
Speaker 1: in is Real Fifth Hour at gmail dot com, on
Speaker 1: Twitter at Ben Maller and Danny. How can people contact
Speaker 1: the Great Danny G Radio to say hello? Very easy?
Speaker 1: At Danny G Radio on Twitter. All right, at Danny
Speaker 1: G Radio on Twitter, And I'm on cameo as well
Speaker 1: if you want to personal video shout out. It's not free,
Speaker 1: but I'll do a minimal or monologue for you whatever
Speaker 1: you want over there on Cameo. Have a wonderful day
Speaker 1: the rest of your Saturday. We'll catch you on Sunday.
Speaker 1: Aloha