Speaker 1: You guys, this is Matt. We have two shows coming
Speaker 1: up in November and they are real gags people. On
Speaker 1: November seven, we are part of New York Comedy Festival.
Speaker 1: We're so excited. Bowen and I are pumped to bring
Speaker 1: Coach More and I Don't Think so, honey Deathmatch to
Speaker 1: the Villain Stage in Brooklyn on November seven. This is
Speaker 1: gonna be two teams, one team at another team Bowen
Speaker 1: Boo and they're gonna be going head to head to
Speaker 1: find out which team can deliver the best. I don't
Speaker 1: think so, honey. This is a head to head death
Speaker 1: match tournament competition, and Boone and I are going to
Speaker 1: be captain in two teams. We have an amazing blue
Speaker 1: ribbon panel. We're going to be really really very soon.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be very good. November seven, Coach War New
Speaker 1: York Comedy Festival. Tickets on Stone now and then it's
Speaker 1: back to basics, bitch. On November eighteenth, we're gonna bring
Speaker 1: our our third edition. I can't believe it's been three
Speaker 1: times of I Don't Think so Honey live. Fifty comedians
Speaker 1: all kill get on the stage, You and the audience
Speaker 1: getting your laugh on, getting your gig, getting someone's phone number.
Speaker 1: I think a show is a really good place to
Speaker 1: meet someone because like they're having a good time, you
Speaker 1: don't have to talk about shared interest. You can talk
Speaker 1: about the show. It's happening right there. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think it might be a good idea. So come
Speaker 1: as a single person or come with a new date.
Speaker 1: But either way it comes to either show, we're both.
Speaker 1: We have cult Hore on November seven, then to your
Speaker 1: comedy festival and I don't think so Honey Live Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Podcast Festival November eight, Ding Dong Lost Culture Snack a
Speaker 1: snack Uru. We have several different snacks out in front
Speaker 1: of us today and let's say what they are please.
Speaker 1: We have a Pepperage Farm favorite but underrated Santa Cruz.
Speaker 1: It's a deep cut. It's oatmeal raisin, and honestly, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say something. Maybe it's because I'm not a cookie person,
Speaker 1: but I prefer oatmeal raisin over a chocolate chip. Bitch.
Speaker 1: I always prefer oatmeal raising. I know this. If I
Speaker 1: had it my way, chocolate chip will be bad. Yes,
Speaker 1: I feel that oatmeal raisin is the only cookie. Legalize
Speaker 1: oatmeal raisin. I don't want chocolate chip coming in thinking
Speaker 1: walking into the club thinking it's the ship. No oatmeal
Speaker 1: raisin is the unsung hero in Are you do you
Speaker 1: really believe this? Are you tickling me? I'm not? Why
Speaker 1: would I didn't know this about you first? You didn't
Speaker 1: know this about me? Bitch for life, have been since
Speaker 1: since a young age. I think that connects us since. Okay,
Speaker 1: we talk about talk about the variety of this candy.
Speaker 1: Here we go. I mean, Eminem's a cultural institution. We've
Speaker 1: got Pretzel, We've got Crispy. What's the difference? Um, there
Speaker 1: suttup and of course the classic milk chocolate Eminem. Now,
Speaker 1: I had the idea before we started to um empty
Speaker 1: out all the the the packages and put them on
Speaker 1: the table and do a little taste, and we we
Speaker 1: would go and pick from the Eminem's and we wouldn't
Speaker 1: know where we were getting a pretzel at Crispy or
Speaker 1: milk chocolate shapes give it away though, between the pretzel
Speaker 1: and the Crispy, it's like those were tough, but the
Speaker 1: milk ones are just a little flat, flat discs. I
Speaker 1: guess you're right, I mean, I guess my plan wasn't
Speaker 1: so so where are we putting these eminems. There's no bold. No,
Speaker 1: we're not talking about a very big table here, guys.
Speaker 1: We're not talking about a very big thing. We're talking
Speaker 1: about a small table with three count of three people
Speaker 1: sitting at it. And you know that I'm at Rogers
Speaker 1: and you know that's bang. But who is the third person?
Speaker 1: Who could it be? Could it be one of our cheekeruys?
Speaker 1: When I saw her tonight, I said, my Chicka, you
Speaker 1: did you did say that? HPJ twortling over there. HPJ
Speaker 1: got a some gorgeous pinot grigio from say the brand Reglatoto.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a Venetian, it's a pinot grigio. I'm
Speaker 1: going to look, I'm butchering my Italian. But this is
Speaker 1: a true, very dry it's very I was saying it's dry,
Speaker 1: which I like, and normally I don't like dry wines. Okay,
Speaker 1: speaking of Italy, famous Italian goddesses with us tonight, let's
Speaker 1: let's tell let's tell the guests who she is. Let's
Speaker 1: talk about credits. You may be hearing this iconic voice
Speaker 1: um on the podcast how to Be a BEEFI lady,
Speaker 1: And this is an independent podcast there now this is
Speaker 1: this is untethered podcast. That means the podcast has the
Speaker 1: Sky's the limit, Sky's the limit and blares her own bom.
Speaker 1: Now you've seen her, not just heard her. You gave
Speaker 1: away the name, you stupid bit. You've seen her, not
Speaker 1: just heard her on MTVS lady Like and you know,
Speaker 1: if you happen to be in Montreal in July, you
Speaker 1: might have caught her on stage as one of Just
Speaker 1: for Laughs is New Faces and the stand up category.
Speaker 1: She which some would say is the premier category, premiere category.
Speaker 1: She really, she's she's she's like, she's a good one.
Speaker 1: She's a good one. And she just literally broke our
Speaker 1: hearts actually by saying that she was lying away and
Speaker 1: going to l a. But I'm happy that we got
Speaker 1: her in the studio before she makes the big She
Speaker 1: looks unreal, okay, and we're going to talk about this. Look, yes,
Speaker 1: here we welcome Blair SACKI Oh my god, Hello, I
Speaker 1: can't even tell you what a fucking thrill. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: this is a thrill for us. I mean, if anyone
Speaker 1: has ever been on the Internet or heard anything I've
Speaker 1: ever said, or seen one of my Instagram stories, they
Speaker 1: know that I'm a fucking freak for Matt and Bowling,
Speaker 1: we're a freak for you. And I remember probably my
Speaker 1: favorite part of I Don't Think So Honey, the second
Speaker 1: one was literally looking over and seeing Christie Chellow and
Speaker 1: Blair Sack like laughing and living and jiggling and moaning
Speaker 1: and phoning. I gotta tell you Blair's Instagram story from
Speaker 1: that night. Yeah, I felt like a fucking you are
Speaker 1: I'm gonna, I'm gonna because about me. She like was
Speaker 1: like self being him from the mirror at in her room,
Speaker 1: being like on my way, like it was the goddamn
Speaker 1: Kevin Hard concerts, a concert that Kevin Hart, Sam, you
Speaker 1: guys are my Kevin Hart. I was like, I have
Speaker 1: a night off and I am putting on my best dress,
Speaker 1: sit on the floor and see these gorgeous men. But
Speaker 1: you know, Blair slated at the First Life show later
Speaker 1: and speaking of gorgeous dress, as you're wearing a Robbert Robert,
Speaker 1: it's it's just a shift. It's a shift. What's the
Speaker 1: difference between a shift and a you know, a regular
Speaker 1: shift to me is a straight um cut, straight cut.
Speaker 1: What I love about this and it's what color. Would
Speaker 1: you call that? Because I'm famously colored of the flowers
Speaker 1: or the salt, or the background, the background, the background.
Speaker 1: I'm going to say, abe, I'm going to even go
Speaker 1: further and say it's a Bondi blue. It's a deep
Speaker 1: blue with purple tones, and it's rich and gorgeous and
Speaker 1: it has orange flowers on it and orange and you
Speaker 1: know what I'm gonna say, um, mandarin tangerine flower. I
Speaker 1: was going to go to antwer to Yeah, the deep orange.
Speaker 1: And now this is for a special occasion. There's going
Speaker 1: to be a date tonight. But you know what, I
Speaker 1: think this is a perfect blend of the fall in
Speaker 1: the spring. Thank you so much, because we're saying goodbye
Speaker 1: to the summer, and you know what, I am fucking
Speaker 1: so happy about it. Um, I will, I will reserve.
Speaker 1: I have some reservations about that, but just really quickly
Speaker 1: before we move on from there's Blare's look. Um. It's
Speaker 1: the perfect middle ground between this is a straight up
Speaker 1: capital D date look or this is just my everyday
Speaker 1: where and I think you kneel, Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: I wanted to show my collar bone but also have
Speaker 1: a little loose, you know, casual yeah, and you're going
Speaker 1: to be very comfortable in it. That's and that's the
Speaker 1: most important. You never want to when you're on a date.
Speaker 1: And I actually I literally haven't gone on a date,
Speaker 1: and I think, um, but I feel like you never
Speaker 1: want to be like distracted by anything. I feel like
Speaker 1: you need to present and you don't want to be
Speaker 1: described distract to buy what you're wearing or feel shitty
Speaker 1: about what you're wearing. Yeah, and it's important to pick
Speaker 1: the right thing to wear. And truly, um, for gays
Speaker 1: out there, I will say, you will never be fully
Speaker 1: prepared for a date because you will probably not have
Speaker 1: access to a good day before. And I will never
Speaker 1: feel fully prepared for a d unless I have a
Speaker 1: clean hole, and most of the time I don't. And
Speaker 1: that's just right there for you. It's it's an assom tote.
Speaker 1: It's a limit. You will never reach that ideal and
Speaker 1: just live with that. And that's what I'm saying. And
Speaker 1: that's and I'm sorry to make this about Oh No,
Speaker 1: I feel the same way. Obviously it's not the exact same.
Speaker 1: But if I am thinking, okay, something is going to
Speaker 1: get in here, I'll go into the bathroom and I'll
Speaker 1: do a little, I'll clean up, see what's happening, some
Speaker 1: soap and water, I'll walk out a hand toss of
Speaker 1: you ready to go? You go. Honestly, for me, it's
Speaker 1: like if you go to the lengths of like a
Speaker 1: full excavation, which is like sometimes like what we do
Speaker 1: sometimes that in and of itself, even if the date
Speaker 1: is not going great, like you will see it through
Speaker 1: because you put the work in. No, that's just like
Speaker 1: I mean, if you spent an hour getting ready, and
Speaker 1: I also realized that many women like this is just
Speaker 1: part of getting ready yet it's just a part of
Speaker 1: the gig. But like if I spend an hour on
Speaker 1: specifically an area, Yeah, it's like I would like the
Speaker 1: area to be like seen. Sure, well it looks so good.
Speaker 1: I'm just bringing that up as to illustrate that, like,
Speaker 1: you will most likely never reach that ideal, So don't
Speaker 1: be too precious about how you're how you're presenting yourself
Speaker 1: or or worrying about anything on a date. So I'm
Speaker 1: just saying, I'm just saying that dates Blair agree, disagree.
Speaker 1: I mean, now this is so stupid and being dates
Speaker 1: are dates are bad? Oh, I don't like do you
Speaker 1: enjoy dating. Well, here's the thing. I had, you know,
Speaker 1: a very private breakup year um. And so then I
Speaker 1: did take not seven, eight, but nine months off dating. Um.
Speaker 1: You know which, in contrast to the other partner who
Speaker 1: was a you know, day turnover over my everyone, I
Speaker 1: was looking the days looked that much longer. But you know,
Speaker 1: I need an incubation period. So I recently just started
Speaker 1: dating again a month ago and now it's great. And
Speaker 1: I think before that I was thinking I don't want
Speaker 1: to do this at all, very closed off. And then
Speaker 1: my therapist was like, you need to think about Danny
Speaker 1: again because it's going to get to be such a
Speaker 1: big thing in your head that it's going to be scary,
Speaker 1: and you just need to treat it casually, like you're
Speaker 1: just meeting someone new and learning about them. So yeah,
Speaker 1: now I've been being real casual, just enjoying no pressure
Speaker 1: to see. I went through something similar where I went
Speaker 1: through a breakup as well, and I like my right
Speaker 1: away was to be very social right away. But and
Speaker 1: I don't mean like dating, I just mean like social,
Speaker 1: going out and doing things. And his experience with the
Speaker 1: breakup was different, like he wanted to really like be introspective. Um,
Speaker 1: and so now it's at the point where he is
Speaker 1: going out and seeing people right now, and I'm kind
Speaker 1: of like in the phase where it's like, actually, I'm
Speaker 1: going to be a monk for the next six months off. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So it's flipped and now I'm like, huh, I don't
Speaker 1: know how I feel so now, because like it is
Speaker 1: a thing. It's like that's it's it's so much more
Speaker 1: than thinking about how do I feel. It's also you
Speaker 1: do compare yourself a little bit to the other person
Speaker 1: and their rebound raid, right And because that was like
Speaker 1: such a public thing and it was like, okay, um,
Speaker 1: it made my way more obvious. But that I know,
Speaker 1: I don't obviously, I'm actually very introverted. Like I love
Speaker 1: to stay at home, which makes it very hard to
Speaker 1: be a comedian every night, but I love to binge,
Speaker 1: watch Lock Up the Doors, binge, watched Till Death, and
Speaker 1: just like never the only contact I have with people
Speaker 1: is through text. Yes, yes, I love that. I feel that.
Speaker 1: To be honest with you, lately, I've been feeling the
Speaker 1: same way, like I feel like my days of going
Speaker 1: out and doing like five or six shows like a
Speaker 1: week which I know what stand up to it like
Speaker 1: a lot more. You'll go out and get like three
Speaker 1: shows at night regularly, maybe too much, honestly, Like I
Speaker 1: feel like especially like and the UCB SNE, which is
Speaker 1: like where I'm in and Bowen is like for some time,
Speaker 1: but like with like you get so it gets to
Speaker 1: be so much now whenever I go over there, it's
Speaker 1: like I really enjoy being there, but you never know
Speaker 1: who you're going to see. I think with this last DCM,
Speaker 1: I kind of realized like, oh my, like it's not
Speaker 1: even social anxiety. It's just like I'm so tired socially.
Speaker 1: I would rather be home now. Yeah. I tell that
Speaker 1: to my friends, were like, oh my god, I can't.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm staying in. I'm so fucking boring, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: our lives are exhausting. I need one day a week,
Speaker 1: twenty four hours silence. I have to. I know, it's
Speaker 1: so much better about it, and then maybe you get
Speaker 1: something done for yourself. Yes, And I you know what
Speaker 1: I've been doing, guys, and it's sad. First thing the
Speaker 1: fucking morning, I'll brush my teeth and on I'll like
Speaker 1: splash water in my face. Thank god, I will go
Speaker 1: straight to that six gaming laptop and wait for a
Speaker 1: fucking dungeon or a raid on this online RPGA. You're
Speaker 1: a video gamer. I'm a gamer, but I'm not I
Speaker 1: will never fucking play an Overwatch because I don't want
Speaker 1: to deal with more shitty people on the fucking Internet
Speaker 1: that I have to. Oh my god, Overwatch haven't even
Speaker 1: played it, but I just your horror stories about the
Speaker 1: culture and the people, and I hope they all fucking
Speaker 1: get a life. I wish I knew what it was.
Speaker 1: But production laughing because he agrees, you know I'm talking about. Yeah, Yeah, Seriously,
Speaker 1: you have to deal with you like you're You have
Speaker 1: to deal in your time the way you deal I
Speaker 1: think for me, like I'm trying to find like a
Speaker 1: new I guess like hobby because for me, the way
Speaker 1: I feel that alone time is a lot of like
Speaker 1: being on Facebook, like being on like Twitter. Like you're
Speaker 1: reading a lot more. You're reading a lot more, reading
Speaker 1: some books. But but you've been reading interviews, You've been
Speaker 1: quoting interviews. You've been really dredging, not dredging, you've been
Speaker 1: scraping all this gorgeous, delicious social drippings. The social dripping. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess like I try to like keep up to
Speaker 1: date with what's going on in the world, but also
Speaker 1: like at the end of the day, like you're still
Speaker 1: sitting on your couch on your laptop, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? Like I wish, I wish, I like enjoyed.
Speaker 1: Do you enjoy something? Oh? Well, you know when I
Speaker 1: was in the just the trenches of humiliation and despair
Speaker 1: where I was like, my friends were texting me like,
Speaker 1: don't kill yourself, and I was like, okay, I want
Speaker 1: thank you. But I started going to yoga every day,
Speaker 1: and um, it was hilarious because you know I'm not
Speaker 1: that's not me. You know it's me now, but you
Speaker 1: found your own way of enjoying it. I did well.
Speaker 1: I was just like, okay, I gotta show up for
Speaker 1: this every day, and you know, maybe and then it
Speaker 1: really helped me. Oh my god, not to get serious,
Speaker 1: but I started up believing God again. What a roller girl, sir.
Speaker 1: It's been back and forth one million times. All my
Speaker 1: friends are always like, yeah, we're afraid you'll end up
Speaker 1: in a colt um and would even be that bad
Speaker 1: if you did? Okay, I'm not born again now even
Speaker 1: though I did decide to believe in God again. Um,
Speaker 1: because now I'm too old and two wise to know
Speaker 1: that I am too mischievous to be a part of
Speaker 1: an organization. But that is no, But that's beautiful. I
Speaker 1: think that's that might be No, it's too mischievous to
Speaker 1: be part of an organization. Maybe we'll see what kind
Speaker 1: of player I think. I don't think that is. I
Speaker 1: don't think that's a bad thing. That you found this
Speaker 1: by yourself and it's all coming from within, and it's
Speaker 1: it doesn't have to maybe eventually it will be, but
Speaker 1: right now it doesn't have to be validated by other people.
Speaker 1: It's just yours and not is huge and that it's beautiful.
Speaker 1: But how did you come to that? Um? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think when you're in such pain and you're just
Speaker 1: like I didn't even know, like I when I'm in
Speaker 1: a relationship, I'm a in and I have such like, Um,
Speaker 1: I'm really traditional in the way that I forget that
Speaker 1: I am. I was just so love and all this stuff,
Speaker 1: and so when you're that heartbroken, you don't realize you're like,
Speaker 1: oh who am I? You know? So then it just
Speaker 1: started from that and then all these I journal thought
Speaker 1: so much. Um, I started meditating. That's the sucking zend
Speaker 1: bitch huge. Yeah, I mean yeah, people in my life
Speaker 1: that I've been close to that have been going through
Speaker 1: something hard, they swear by it. They tell me all
Speaker 1: the time that it would be good for me that improbiotics. Honestly, though,
Speaker 1: one step at a time at a time I can't beat.
Speaker 1: Oh so weird. My friends like, you're fucking weird. You're
Speaker 1: a weird fucking yoga virgin. I was like, I know,
Speaker 1: but this is just what's happening, and like if I
Speaker 1: can get up another day, it's good. I would like
Speaker 1: start crying. And also it was like bombing all winter
Speaker 1: two before I could get my act because I couldn't
Speaker 1: go back to my regular jokes and then so I
Speaker 1: had to put together a new act. You know, I'd
Speaker 1: been crying before I walked on stage. Yeah, just it
Speaker 1: was wild. But also because it when it's it's so hard,
Speaker 1: it came out of it quick too. Yeah, because I
Speaker 1: I just went full in. I noticed that, and even
Speaker 1: I think you and I were at the Jane one
Speaker 1: night for Grettish show. Oh, I think I was very
Speaker 1: much still going through it then but you. I was
Speaker 1: like really just like I was just really like really
Speaker 1: blown away by like just you, I mean you were.
Speaker 1: I walk into that beautifully lit room, dimly lit room.
Speaker 1: You're sitting there on this like velvet upholstered couch with
Speaker 1: a glass of white wine, and I'm like, Blair, like
Speaker 1: that is this is you? And top it was and
Speaker 1: it was a vision. And then you talk to me
Speaker 1: about you know, what you're going through and how it
Speaker 1: still felt fresh, and I was like, okay, but look
Speaker 1: at you now, like this is not going to be
Speaker 1: I'm sure it was challenging. This is not going to
Speaker 1: be what like destroyed ruins you it never would have
Speaker 1: been that. Like I was like, no, Like Blair is
Speaker 1: like fine, but okay, I'm I'm curious about this. Okay,
Speaker 1: belief in God is it? Is it certain? Is it
Speaker 1: a certain like um? Is its under a certain sort
Speaker 1: of religion? Is it like a Christian nomination? Nomination? No? No, nothing. Now, well,
Speaker 1: you know what I used to say, universe and I
Speaker 1: was like that's now fucking more corny than saying the
Speaker 1: word of God. I think you're right. I think that
Speaker 1: you're right, but to me, it is universe. But now
Speaker 1: it's something and um not to not to bring her
Speaker 1: beliefs in this, but I always find it so cool
Speaker 1: refreshing Christie Christie Christie back into this is just it's Catholic,
Speaker 1: and it's just so open about her beliefs and it's
Speaker 1: yet also like a mischievous little little thing. But she
Speaker 1: is so funny and so herself. Like do you guys
Speaker 1: have conversations about this ever or no? Yeah, no, We've
Speaker 1: talked about it a lot until like she's invited me
Speaker 1: to church with her and stuff, and I'm just like,
Speaker 1: it's not churchesn't for me. Different, Yeah, but yeah, we know,
Speaker 1: we talked about all the time and stuff like I
Speaker 1: think that was my whole I was raised Catholic too,
Speaker 1: and so that was my whole thing. Where anything I do,
Speaker 1: I'm always like kind of all or nothing. And now
Speaker 1: that it comes with age that you find your own
Speaker 1: way that you're not. Everything's not all or nothing, and
Speaker 1: so I'm not Catholic at all, even though like Italian
Speaker 1: it's so whatever. But now I just pray all the
Speaker 1: time and I feel great, and you know, I don't
Speaker 1: really know who I'm praying to write it doesn't it
Speaker 1: doesn't matter. It's almost like an organization of thought, I think. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And also is it Roman Catholic that you were raised? Yes?
Speaker 1: I was. Also, So where are you from? Originally remind
Speaker 1: us in the viewers Orange County, California. So I guess
Speaker 1: this would be a good time to answer to ask
Speaker 1: this question. Then, So we're gonna ask you the question Blair,
Speaker 1: that we ask all of our guests, which is really
Speaker 1: the central question of last Culture Rests, which is what
Speaker 1: was the culture that shaped you young Blair Saki to
Speaker 1: become the Blair Saki of now? Like it could be
Speaker 1: a movie, television shows, um music, something like cultural or
Speaker 1: like any situation that you went through that you feel
Speaker 1: like made you who you are today, or even it
Speaker 1: can even be like Orange County as a neighborhood or
Speaker 1: as like a culture or anything that like you feel
Speaker 1: has an overarching has had an overarching effect on you. Now, okay,
Speaker 1: a few things. So I grew up in Orange County.
Speaker 1: Um at the b HL was like a competitive surfer.
Speaker 1: Yeah that to me now it just sounds hilarious. Very
Speaker 1: Blue Crush. Blue Crush one of my favorite movies. She
Speaker 1: had to put on twenty pounds of muscle to play
Speaker 1: that role. Wo that fucking bitch. Yeah, so surf. And
Speaker 1: then there's absolutely Orange County. This gorgeous gorgeous Sims game
Speaker 1: is um culturally Barren places a gorgeous gorgeous Sims game.
Speaker 1: It is. So I found my way through a few
Speaker 1: different things. Um. One one so funny. She is someone
Speaker 1: that's never been mentioned on the show. Actually out of
Speaker 1: time in California, my god, my truth. Um also crylo
Speaker 1: genically frozen woman who ages backwards. She's almost believable, almost
Speaker 1: fifty years old. And also she is very similar I
Speaker 1: think to like Pink were like something about that. They
Speaker 1: just keep putting out music that's like relevant, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. Like her last album was like pop
Speaker 1: in the way that like it feels like pop now,
Speaker 1: but you forget that, Like I don't know what happened.
Speaker 1: Maybe she was just like peace out on my solo
Speaker 1: career or like the second album didn't do as well
Speaker 1: as the first solo album, but that first solo album
Speaker 1: Love Angel Music Baby defining still ahead of its time.
Speaker 1: Of course, we have the girl here we go as
Speaker 1: an Asian person, I will say that like listen, like
Speaker 1: I mean, of course, like blatantly, like on on paper.
Speaker 1: It is like appropriation and it sucks. But I was
Speaker 1: just like, this is so cool that, like she has
Speaker 1: these people and she's like referencing and paying tribute to
Speaker 1: this thing. I still think part of HARRISU Grew Girls,
Speaker 1: you know, as a single and then as it sort
Speaker 1: of overarches in the that album was kind of a
Speaker 1: tribute in a way. I mean it. And it sucks
Speaker 1: like she thought she could get away with like turning
Speaker 1: her arms into elves in some parts of that song,
Speaker 1: Like that is bullshit. But that album I thought was
Speaker 1: very cool. It was a way to surface Asians in
Speaker 1: this way that was not like kung fu bullshit. Like
Speaker 1: it wasn't like that kind of like Hackney thing. It
Speaker 1: was like, oh no, these people like influence fashion and
Speaker 1: culture all these things. So was it her like part
Speaker 1: of No doubt? Though, Oh my god, Tragic Kingdom first CD.
Speaker 1: That's a good first CD. It was that I listened
Speaker 1: to on my stereo in my room with the door closed.
Speaker 1: Just while I couldn't believe her beauty. I couldn't believe
Speaker 1: her crop tops and baggy pants, like and just everything
Speaker 1: about her. I was like, I will die if I
Speaker 1: ever have abs like that. She's everything about her. I
Speaker 1: just thought she was the coolest. Um. And then besides that,
Speaker 1: I um my brothers. I wanted everything to just do
Speaker 1: anything they did. So I was very involved in sports
Speaker 1: and I had I had two older brothers, UM, and
Speaker 1: they didn't let me hang out with him a lot.
Speaker 1: So my mom would take me to the sand On
Speaker 1: Capistrano Public Library and I would check out the maximum
Speaker 1: three week Um, I read all sixty four Nancy Drew
Speaker 1: books at the sanmon Public Library. That so Nancy Drew
Speaker 1: and the Ladies of Blue Cross. Yes, that's me. Yes,
Speaker 1: I love that. That's great and that makes that all
Speaker 1: triangulates for you. So oh, thank you very much, because
Speaker 1: I also I just have to also throw in I
Speaker 1: would be completely remiss. Um TLC second saw them, Yeah
Speaker 1: they went, And also I think they kind of get
Speaker 1: lost because Destiny's Child kind of like the defining girl
Speaker 1: group after that, because but like people forget, like the
Speaker 1: children have forgotten, children never gone. How amazing. TLC was crazy, sexy, cool,
Speaker 1: It's just top to bottom brilliant. And even fan Mail,
Speaker 1: even their second album is like, oh I like fan Mail.
Speaker 1: Oh I fucking love fan mail. And also I listened
Speaker 1: to Crazy Sexy Cool once a month. Um, and then
Speaker 1: now I just thought of one more and that's Jagged
Speaker 1: Little Pill. Yeah, great, that's so funny. On our last episode,
Speaker 1: was it last time? It was the last episode Jagged
Speaker 1: Little Pill? Was was also little Pill? Mike Kelton, Um
Speaker 1: that might come. Yeah, this and like that makes so
Speaker 1: much sense because and Mike brought this up. And I
Speaker 1: want to see what you think about this, Like she
Speaker 1: was intelligent about like her pain, because she turned it
Speaker 1: into something. She probably wasn't this girl that was like
Speaker 1: actually screaming at people and like making a scene. She
Speaker 1: probably and I think she is in interview is like
Speaker 1: Alanis Morris said, is like it pretty seems a pretty introverted,
Speaker 1: quiet person. But then when you listen to her album,
Speaker 1: you would think, oh, this person is like angry, angry
Speaker 1: and probably a lot to deal with. But then you
Speaker 1: see interviews with her and it's just like this very
Speaker 1: kind of like plaintiff, she dialed it up. She taled
Speaker 1: it up. Yeah, hundred persons agree. Also, my mind every
Speaker 1: day is blown. That you ought to know is about
Speaker 1: none other than Dave. Yeah, I didn't know uncle. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was. The song was about him, like strongly allegedly.
Speaker 1: I don't know how everyone came to this conclusion. She
Speaker 1: might have said it at some point, or maybe he
Speaker 1: might have alluded to the fact that it was him.
Speaker 1: But they apparently dated like in Canada and she was
Speaker 1: like really young and she went down on him in
Speaker 1: a theater. Apparently she's the You're the queen. You're the queen.
Speaker 1: If you hear this, she is the queen. Wow, you go.
Speaker 1: You have a lot of nineties queens on that list.
Speaker 1: I do, and like I feel for them the same
Speaker 1: way I did when I was at Ith. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: I feel the same way my stand up. Like if
Speaker 1: someone saw me on stage, they would think I was
Speaker 1: a completely different person, but full opposite person. That's that's
Speaker 1: kind of a healthy way to compartmentalize it in a
Speaker 1: lot of ways, right. It's like, well, if that's I
Speaker 1: was just gonna say, if that's true, then I fucking
Speaker 1: step out there the same way I am when I'm not.
Speaker 1: But it's it's like a whole different kind of art,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Like it's so different, right, Um,
Speaker 1: It's so interesting like with like with like a job
Speaker 1: Para for example, that I don't really know Joe on
Speaker 1: a personal level, and I don't really know what who
Speaker 1: knows what he's like, what he's like like you know,
Speaker 1: in reality quote unquote. But I feel like that's another
Speaker 1: example where it's like maybe it's like a totally diametrically
Speaker 1: opposite thing, but I mean, I I find that to
Speaker 1: be like I'm jealous of people who can do that, Blair,
Speaker 1: like people like you who are like able to like
Speaker 1: flip something. Well, to me, I don't feel like I'm
Speaker 1: flipping something because that's a very real part of myself
Speaker 1: that's just never expressed anywhere else. And for some reason,
Speaker 1: like when I sit on the stage, because I am
Speaker 1: really very laid back and like you know, I'm usually
Speaker 1: a beta with people like yes, and then when I
Speaker 1: get on stage, that's the person that I feel and
Speaker 1: that's what it is, which is yeah, but it's not
Speaker 1: you know, that's really though, mostly the only time I
Speaker 1: feel that way. And I bet that a lot of
Speaker 1: and that's interesting that a lot of like your idols,
Speaker 1: I feel like, would say the same thing, because like
Speaker 1: I don't know what gwen Stefanny is like in person,
Speaker 1: but she can't possibly be anything like she is on
Speaker 1: stage because she's so wild on stage. Right. I remember
Speaker 1: my cousin like was like into like only like Jack
Speaker 1: Johnson type music, like very surfree type music, and he
Speaker 1: was like kind of like a BROI like high school,
Speaker 1: And they went to go Seequence to Fanny and Concert
Speaker 1: off the solo album, and he said it was the
Speaker 1: best concept that he had ever gone to. And then
Speaker 1: I was like, maybe he's just going to a lot
Speaker 1: of boring concerts. But like, I think the kid went
Speaker 1: to a lot of concerts and like she put on
Speaker 1: a real fucking show. Apparently, what do we think of
Speaker 1: the fact that she's like, is she getting married to
Speaker 1: Blake Shelton? Okay, this is what I think. Tell me
Speaker 1: what you think she spun in the chair. She's excited
Speaker 1: to share this. After you deal with someone that's so
Speaker 1: fucking squorely, yeah, you go the other way to some
Speaker 1: what you think of as like a real man of
Speaker 1: like some sort of cowboy and stuff. Even though Blake
Speaker 1: has had like three divorces, he seems like this amiable,
Speaker 1: He's extremely likable. It's like I want to not like him,
Speaker 1: but also I'm so happy that she's got like this rebound.
Speaker 1: She's really happy with this fucking you listen to me
Speaker 1: right now. This fucking famous dude banging the nanny thing
Speaker 1: is so trite, it's so crazy. Fuck you, you're boring
Speaker 1: these fuck nanny's that come out of nowhere. It's like
Speaker 1: the new fun buddy n It's like all of a sudden.
Speaker 1: I think it started with Jude Law, of course, and
Speaker 1: they all have the prettiest wives. Yeah, Sienna Miller was
Speaker 1: his wife. You don't get more gorgeous than insane. I
Speaker 1: remember being heartbroken when that happened because I was obsessed
Speaker 1: with jud Law and it was like he must be miserable,
Speaker 1: but also suck him for fucking the nanny. Oh you
Speaker 1: know how charming he is that he's a sociopath, Like,
Speaker 1: don't get to be that charming a socioth and unfeeling sociopath.
Speaker 1: She's charm, he gets looking charm of green Goods Goblin.
Speaker 1: He was also in the rember of that movie Alfie,
Speaker 1: which is so Stanehowski and Susan Suranni Long also has
Speaker 1: an age of day in decades. Nia Long is cryogenically
Speaker 1: frozen also, and also I think she's another one of these,
Speaker 1: another Nia Long, another Megan Good Megan Good is and
Speaker 1: I could stand to watch her and literally the gorgeous Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's actually you know what she no matter what she's doing,
Speaker 1: always seems cool ever since cousin Skeeter, like so cool
Speaker 1: all the time. And also I feel like she is
Speaker 1: one at like you always are, Like she'll be she
Speaker 1: don't want to, she'll always be around. But it's got
Speaker 1: to be hard for her, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: to get parts. It's got to be hard for her
Speaker 1: because you know all the black actresses that are her
Speaker 1: age and like her, like there was all that like
Speaker 1: there was that story when Gabrielle and Union one like
Speaker 1: she won like like essence Woman of the Year and
Speaker 1: she gave a speech and it was it kind of
Speaker 1: went viral where she was like, it's amazing to be
Speaker 1: spending standing up here right now because everyone in this room,
Speaker 1: every woman in this room, whenever you succeeded, I hated you,
Speaker 1: like whenever you booked a part, I cursed you behind
Speaker 1: your back. And that was the way I lived my
Speaker 1: life for fifteen years. And then I had to really
Speaker 1: someone said something to me and they said, like they
Speaker 1: put me straight. And I really had like a two
Speaker 1: year period where I had to like sit with myself
Speaker 1: and say, why can't I celebrate other women? And honestly,
Speaker 1: part of it is because the industry makes you fight
Speaker 1: for a certain amount of spots. But also it's it's
Speaker 1: it's like that what that creates is like a true
Speaker 1: hatred and competitiveness. Like she said that she was up
Speaker 1: for the Kerry Washington role and the Shonda Rhimes since
Speaker 1: Scandal show, uh Olivia Pope, which I am faith, but
Speaker 1: I mean she would have been incredible. She would have
Speaker 1: been incredible. But I think I think was also up
Speaker 1: for That's the thing. Every black actress was up for
Speaker 1: it because it was a black worm. And I think
Speaker 1: so maybe that's what she was probably saying that speech, right,
Speaker 1: That's just she was like, that's the reality. We all
Speaker 1: have for the same stuff. And every time you guys
Speaker 1: got something and I didn't, I was mad. But you
Speaker 1: know what we've turned We have to It's not that
Speaker 1: we have to hate each other. We have to start
Speaker 1: hating the reality and fighting against the reality. And that
Speaker 1: was like the crux of the speech. But she was saying,
Speaker 1: like she came that close to booking Olivia Pope, but
Speaker 1: everyone knew that was like Kerry Washington because like just
Speaker 1: the kind of actor she is, the kind of person
Speaker 1: she is, she was best suited. Ye. But now it's
Speaker 1: like that's hard, hard because I think she said something
Speaker 1: to like every year, it's like you look at the
Speaker 1: pilot season and there's two three roles for you at all.
Speaker 1: So you have to think about someone like Megan Good,
Speaker 1: who's pretty specific as an actress because she is so
Speaker 1: like cool and hot and like chill and laid back.
Speaker 1: You don't really see her do a lot other than that,
Speaker 1: like she probably has to fight and struggle for barts.
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, you think we're not saying that
Speaker 1: that's not true. I'm just thinking of Zoe Kravitz, who
Speaker 1: you think is pitome, well, cool and hot, and she's
Speaker 1: have every role in the world and I want to
Speaker 1: watch her to the end of days. Yeah, she fucking books.
Speaker 1: She books on books on books. I think also though,
Speaker 1: that's such an important thing and it's so hard because
Speaker 1: especially like when you come in the stand up world
Speaker 1: where it's like such a singular thing. But what I
Speaker 1: think about a stand up besides being on stage and
Speaker 1: I love my guy friends, but the most thing that
Speaker 1: I think about what I'm grateful for is the women
Speaker 1: that I am become friends with, and even this year,
Speaker 1: and as you get older and you're like, wow, I'm
Speaker 1: doing this really wild thing, probably sacrificing a lot of
Speaker 1: like I would have been married, young, with kids and
Speaker 1: all this ship. I'm really sacrificing for this thing in
Speaker 1: life that I believe in and these women that I
Speaker 1: am so lucky to be friends with, and these stand
Speaker 1: ups and you know, other community, the smartest, most kind
Speaker 1: loyal people who understand you in a way that is
Speaker 1: unparalleled and will never be experienced. It's the most beautiful
Speaker 1: thing that I feel so lucky to every day have
Speaker 1: I can't even and make me such a better person.
Speaker 1: And it's just like I think when I think of
Speaker 1: any of us getting any success, we all get successful.
Speaker 1: You're gonna make crap, That's that's yeah. And it's about
Speaker 1: believing that and letting that be the energy that you
Speaker 1: lead with, because that is contagious. I think the second
Speaker 1: you walk into a room and you can get a
Speaker 1: look over your shoulder, that energy is out there. And
Speaker 1: I think like it has been getting better, like the
Speaker 1: communities are strong, you know what I mean? You don't
Speaker 1: see I think because people have started to call out
Speaker 1: like the bullshit a little bit more and say, no,
Speaker 1: it's not our problem that that that the situation is
Speaker 1: a toxic one. It's like the situation's problem. Like let's
Speaker 1: let's all like work to changes and support each other,
Speaker 1: but just to like bring these two pieces together. And
Speaker 1: to bring up a lazy example, it's like whenever Joel
Speaker 1: and I give out for the same fucking ship all
Speaker 1: the time, it's not like, oh sorry, another gay Asian comedian,
Speaker 1: um ah. Whenever we go out for the same things,
Speaker 1: it's not like there's an I rolling moment where it's like, oh,
Speaker 1: of course we're up for this. But it's like there's
Speaker 1: no contention, there's no acrimony there. It's just like, okay,
Speaker 1: if either of us book this, then like we've only
Speaker 1: ever been supportive for each other when like those kinds
Speaker 1: of things have like played out and to zoom out
Speaker 1: of that all the all the fucking game and in
Speaker 1: New York go for the same ship, and it's but
Speaker 1: then there's no like yeah, but then like by some miracle,
Speaker 1: it's because of those it's because of this community where
Speaker 1: people where we've sort of caught up to that and
Speaker 1: gotten smart about that, where it's like we are able
Speaker 1: to get ahead of that and not let those feelings
Speaker 1: get in the way and just be supportive of whatever
Speaker 1: happens and whatever success falls on any of our our friends.
Speaker 1: And that's what makes me fucking not to be like
Speaker 1: who would pat ourselves on the back, But that what
Speaker 1: makes me proud of like that I don't think so
Speaker 1: honey shows, you know what I mean, Because that's literally
Speaker 1: fifty or a hundred people now we've had on the
Speaker 1: shows who on any other bill would be the only
Speaker 1: person Like that's that's different than the fucking washed out
Speaker 1: well you can't have more than two gay people, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like, and that just goes to show.
Speaker 1: I left the stage and someone said to me, they
Speaker 1: were like, it's so crazy that people say they can't
Speaker 1: find diversity, because you could just look at the show
Speaker 1: and there's like literally dozens of people the people that
Speaker 1: I saw and learned of from your Guys show and
Speaker 1: it's so cool And also just that's the best thing
Speaker 1: about booking your own show, and like I love doing
Speaker 1: that because I don't think of the like oftentimes I'm like,
Speaker 1: who do I think is the funniest, and then I
Speaker 1: can easily have an all gay lineup without even thinking
Speaker 1: about But that's you know, the like I am very
Speaker 1: the people that I think are innovative and that I'm
Speaker 1: interested in right now that I'm like, want to hear guy, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I hear like this, you know, stand up you. It's
Speaker 1: just like I love hearing the different ship and like
Speaker 1: it's so it's so refreshing and fun for me, Like
Speaker 1: it just feels I love it. I love it. And
Speaker 1: every now and then there's a straight white who will
Speaker 1: um not saying that the straight whites are good about this, Matt,
Speaker 1: and I love one person who does who is like
Speaker 1: a little throwback to the old school. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: you know what you're talking about. Martin Orbano, truly legendary.
Speaker 1: He doesn't know here this year from Austin, he was
Speaker 1: I was so fucking terrified of having to follow him
Speaker 1: because he's just bam bam, bam, bam bam, and he's
Speaker 1: so fucking from the nicest. Yes, he's I mean, he's incredible,
Speaker 1: and I was just praying that I didn't have to
Speaker 1: follow him. I'm sure he killed I mean, she was
Speaker 1: amazing and great. But the thing is like, yeah, he
Speaker 1: is one of those like he's just like totally something different,
Speaker 1: you know what i mean, And like you see that
Speaker 1: and you're like, yeah, fucking more of that, Yeah, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, And that's that's just cool. And
Speaker 1: then to see his success after that, like unbelievable. It's
Speaker 1: so cool. That's the kind of thing. And also, like
Speaker 1: I'll say a thinking about him, I'll say again, one
Speaker 1: of the SNL hires we just found out about it too,
Speaker 1: who destroyed Lay And that's something that's someone that you've
Speaker 1: never seen anything like you and that's you know what
Speaker 1: i mean. Like it's just it's just very cool. So
Speaker 1: just like yeah, just wanting like people to catch up
Speaker 1: on the fact that like like you have no idea
Speaker 1: what you're a fan of because you haven't even seen
Speaker 1: it yet, Like you've never seen a show with like
Speaker 1: more than one gay so that it's a shame when
Speaker 1: people walk away from the shows and they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: the gay guy was was funny and they didn't even
Speaker 1: know their names. Like sometimes it's like when there's more
Speaker 1: than one gay on you have to know their names
Speaker 1: because you have to know how to tell them apart
Speaker 1: when you talk about it later. And also, um, like
Speaker 1: people just don't that aren't familiar with comedy. They have
Speaker 1: very little frame of reference. Like a lot of times,
Speaker 1: I mean, and I'm sure this happens to you in
Speaker 1: whatever capacity, the same thing, but like people are like, oh,
Speaker 1: like they'll always drop Amy Schumer in with me just
Speaker 1: because I have blondear and so they'll be like, either
Speaker 1: it's like, you know, I love that you're trying to
Speaker 1: do the Amy Schumer thing when I literally I could
Speaker 1: not if you heard her stand up and my stand
Speaker 1: up nothing literally nothing, yeah, or like they'll place her
Speaker 1: down or they'll say she's better than me. There's just
Speaker 1: they'll they'll be like, I like you so much better
Speaker 1: than her, or like you're an Amy Schumer wanna be
Speaker 1: like or something so like it's always that's just the
Speaker 1: one woman blonde that they know and so but they
Speaker 1: just don't like. And you also hear about like it's
Speaker 1: amazing too, like you heard about other comics that like
Speaker 1: they let that get to them and then they get vicious,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, like not to like blow
Speaker 1: her up even more that she's been blown up, but
Speaker 1: she did deserve it. But like, I can't imagine that
Speaker 1: liket of like pleasant to be around when the topic
Speaker 1: of Amy Schumer comes up, you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: I'm sure that's I will just say this, like a
Speaker 1: fucking shady bit. If you spend an interview, send an
Speaker 1: interview shitting on your fucking own kind in your own community,
Speaker 1: you're gonna get what you deserve. Of course, going to
Speaker 1: come back around Blair, do you do you world two jokes?
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding, don't answer that. That's that that's a reference.
Speaker 1: I don't so. I'm not a real comedian, but I
Speaker 1: like to spend my days pretending. See, this is the
Speaker 1: thing about Blair, and this is like I think this
Speaker 1: is why you're able to talk so deeply and at
Speaker 1: such length about this. It's because I think you were
Speaker 1: so aware of your place in this industry and that
Speaker 1: that sounds that sounds weird, but I just think you
Speaker 1: just know yourself. You know what you want, you know
Speaker 1: where you are, you know where you're going to go,
Speaker 1: and that is so cool because I think that is
Speaker 1: something that even I don't even have. That is something
Speaker 1: that not a lot of people have Wow, that is
Speaker 1: the nicest thing in the world, because you know you
Speaker 1: don't feel that way ever, which is so crazy to me,
Speaker 1: because I have followed you guys, probably before we hadn't
Speaker 1: even met. Yes, yes, I go to it. I was
Speaker 1: going to both your shows before I think we had
Speaker 1: even met. But we were following each other on like
Speaker 1: social media and all that stuff before we hadn't even
Speaker 1: met for sure. But I don't even know. I come from,
Speaker 1: like I think in athlete mentality, and my dad is
Speaker 1: like this self made like you work for everything you
Speaker 1: get type of thing, and and athletes you know you
Speaker 1: have a bad game and you still have to play
Speaker 1: the next day. I'm like, I don't know what I'm
Speaker 1: doing anything more than I'm gonna try my hardest, be
Speaker 1: nice to people. I'm gonna sunk up a lot. Who
Speaker 1: knows I'm doing the best I can every day. I
Speaker 1: don't know my place at all. I just hope and
Speaker 1: keep going. I don't think that's true because the fact
Speaker 1: that you're able to talk about yourself and the community.
Speaker 1: Don't you tell her what she knows and which I'm
Speaker 1: trying to compliment her? Um? Wait, so you say you
Speaker 1: come from like an athletic mentality to surfing competitively? Was
Speaker 1: your dad like a coach type dad? My dad was
Speaker 1: a varsity football and baseball man. Yeah, and so I've
Speaker 1: identified with you when you say the kind of you
Speaker 1: would you approach it like an athlete thing, because a
Speaker 1: big like way in for my dad from me with
Speaker 1: like the comedy and acting and like, you know, entertainment
Speaker 1: industry thing. Is kind of like thinking about it, like
Speaker 1: like but when I'm getting ready for a show, He's
Speaker 1: treats me very much like like when I was getting
Speaker 1: ready around like a track meet or something, or like
Speaker 1: warming up, He's like, you gotta get in your He's
Speaker 1: like very like you know, he gets he gets it
Speaker 1: and relates to it in that way. It's so it's
Speaker 1: so interesting to see this replace that in my life
Speaker 1: in a way. Absolutely. My dad texts me. And granted
Speaker 1: my parents, I have never seen my stand up, any
Speaker 1: of my TV sid nothing. They fully support me now
Speaker 1: because they realize it's something I am doing, but it's
Speaker 1: like their biggest nightmare whatever. So I've never seen anything,
Speaker 1: but my dad will text me if I have like
Speaker 1: a big show or something, He'll text me. Remember even
Speaker 1: Kobe Bryant gets nervous before they get even even Kobe.
Speaker 1: That's so funny. It is sweet. It's so funny because
Speaker 1: like I used to watch all these sports and stuff
Speaker 1: because and like I didn't really realize it, but it
Speaker 1: was just to connect in my family. Like and as
Speaker 1: soon as I moved to New York, like I never
Speaker 1: watched Bors again. But like it's funny because you're just like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is my family. This is the way they will
Speaker 1: never understand this whole side of me or you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: see we were man, it's it's my dad used to say,
Speaker 1: you know, hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard.
Speaker 1: My dad says that to me one million times, and
Speaker 1: I think it's like I think he thinks he made
Speaker 1: it up. Maybe he did, but but he would like
Speaker 1: write it down as an affirmation. And that is also
Speaker 1: a thing. Like my dad, like he was he would
Speaker 1: teach like um little League camps and he would write
Speaker 1: down like an affirmation every day, And that in its
Speaker 1: own way is like kind of religious in a way, right,
Speaker 1: like ritualistic, you know what I mean, like repeating mantras. Yeah, amazing.
Speaker 1: So in fact, I'm just trying to break down the
Speaker 1: syntax of this hard work beats talent when talent doesn't
Speaker 1: work hard. So he's saying, when you're talented but lazy,
Speaker 1: you have to work hard. No, No, I know I
Speaker 1: am deliberately misunderstand this, but I'm just trying to get
Speaker 1: to the bottom of like the logical he's saying that
Speaker 1: what he's saying, it wouldn't matter if you were talented
Speaker 1: if you didn't keep working as if you had something
Speaker 1: to prove. It's so true, though, Like, don't you really like,
Speaker 1: I mean, don't you feel that way there? Don't you
Speaker 1: know the most talented people in our community who should
Speaker 1: like who are lazy as so hard? Yeah? Right? And
Speaker 1: then people that work so hard? Who you If you
Speaker 1: have all the talent in the world, great, that means
Speaker 1: that you better work hard. I see what he's saying. No,
Speaker 1: hold on, hold on, just syntactically on the on the sentence.
Speaker 1: I'm not making fun of your He's saying hard work
Speaker 1: beats talent as opposed to talent not working hard, when like,
Speaker 1: like vis a v talent on, Why did you say
Speaker 1: this way when talent doesn't doesn't work hard? Hard hard workers? No? No, no,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be talented people with a talented person who
Speaker 1: doesn't work hard another person who is, well, you can't
Speaker 1: put that on a poster. Bitch, Fine, you can't fit
Speaker 1: that on a post. Here's the thing you will number
Speaker 1: seventy one of culture that has to fit on the poster.
Speaker 1: I will say this, Um, both of you guys have
Speaker 1: have these amazing, hardworking athlete parents. Um. The way the
Speaker 1: way things were ingreeded into me with work ethic were
Speaker 1: two very scientific parents, academic parents who like would pep
Speaker 1: talk me like before standardized tests and we're just very
Speaker 1: scientific about it. And like with like stuff that's been
Speaker 1: happening with me with with stuff recently where I've gotten
Speaker 1: for stuff, like my dad will just be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: just going and do well, Like it's as if that's
Speaker 1: a given, as if like that's there's like not doing
Speaker 1: well it's not an option, which is healthy but not
Speaker 1: healthy at the same time, and like, I yeah, like
Speaker 1: hearing you guys talk about your your dad's like this
Speaker 1: is like very cool. But also on the other hand,
Speaker 1: I think there's like there's also merits to like the
Speaker 1: other the alternative, the other side of that corn where
Speaker 1: it's like your parents are just like you will do
Speaker 1: well and um, failure is not an option. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: just warm loving that, and I'd rather have that than
Speaker 1: the parents that are like and you know, God bless
Speaker 1: these parents. You probably raise your children to be lovely people.
Speaker 1: But the people that are like, do your best and
Speaker 1: that's okay and if it doesn't matter. My dad would
Speaker 1: never say that. I remember I wasn't like a real
Speaker 1: slump in baseball and I was sitting in the car
Speaker 1: like moping, and I turned to my dad and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't know I'm gonna slump. And he's like, well,
Speaker 1: that's because like you suck, right. He's like, you're not.
Speaker 1: You're like your swing is like horrible. It's like you
Speaker 1: haven't learned anything. It's you literally look like a man.
Speaker 1: I don't think I would have been able to live
Speaker 1: through any of that with my if my father were
Speaker 1: my coach. Oh no, I mean I also understand, like culturally,
Speaker 1: like that's like it was, it was different, like you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, like you probably understand what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: I do completely. My dad the same ship, like God
Speaker 1: bless him, really good dad, but you know he's a
Speaker 1: fiery man. He's definitely walked out of the gym before
Speaker 1: when I wasn't playing well. But I'm the type of
Speaker 1: person now like I am to myself. Obviously I'm gonna
Speaker 1: prepare and work as hard as I can. But I'm saying,
Speaker 1: if I funk up or bomb, I did the best
Speaker 1: I could. And and that's that's a place you can
Speaker 1: get to when you know, well, it's like okay, well
Speaker 1: I'll walk out of here and it'll be it'll be
Speaker 1: up to me how I deal with it. It's like
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like it's like that's kind
Speaker 1: of like yeah, it's like, well that's part of it,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I will do better next
Speaker 1: time because that sucked. I'm learning and I'm doing the
Speaker 1: best I can. If I'm preparing the best I can
Speaker 1: and I'm doing the best I can, that's the best
Speaker 1: I can do. And if you know what your best is. Also,
Speaker 1: like I only know as much as I know, like
Speaker 1: I have to funk up in order to learn. But
Speaker 1: also when I'm going in for auditions, which I don't
Speaker 1: know audition that much, but like when I go in,
Speaker 1: I have this thought like, Okay, I'm not a size zero.
Speaker 1: That is sometimes my negative thought. Yeah, but and then
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, well whatever, I can just be as
Speaker 1: good as I can be and then we'll see what happens.
Speaker 1: And that's when you're thankful for the fact that you
Speaker 1: worked hard to get there, because at least you look
Speaker 1: around and like if the fucking sometimes I will get
Speaker 1: sent in for these things and like like I'll look
Speaker 1: around and these other guys around me are like fucking knockouts.
Speaker 1: Like I'm just like these's there's no way, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no, because there's no way because if you put
Speaker 1: me in a room with like Chris Hemsworth, it doesn't
Speaker 1: fucking matter, you know what I mean. Like it's like
Speaker 1: you look around and it's like, oh, it literally doesn't matter,
Speaker 1: Like why not him? Like like girls are going to
Speaker 1: be like learning to masturbate to that guy? Yeah you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Like that, I was like I
Speaker 1: would cast him. Does it again? You put That's what
Speaker 1: I tried to do. Put my head down these other
Speaker 1: people christians Worth, and you know he is not in
Speaker 1: the audition room with me, so all I can do.
Speaker 1: Yesterday I auditioned for Trash Sheet White Trash Florida surfer
Speaker 1: who steals a lot. I think, how did you feel
Speaker 1: about it? I think it went really well. Yes, I
Speaker 1: I ran my scenes, then went to the UM, went
Speaker 1: to the elevator, had my dirty trucker had on from
Speaker 1: that I got in UM that I had in a
Speaker 1: party bag from a surf contest years ago. They came back,
Speaker 1: came out and grabbed me and said, hey, can we
Speaker 1: run it again without the hat? Which, but that's good though.
Speaker 1: They wanted to see that. They wanted to see you
Speaker 1: without the hat. And honestly, I talked about the halt
Speaker 1: for a second because Blair pulls that look off with yeah,
Speaker 1: you rock that hat, because it's genuine. You cannot do
Speaker 1: it untrive. You cannot come contrived with the backwards bat
Speaker 1: or the forward you cannot come contrived. You cannot come contrived.
Speaker 1: And it's so natural, it's not forced. It is organic. Honestly, Yes, trashy,
Speaker 1: but sometimes it's wear on with some greasy roots. Oh
Speaker 1: you know what, there's nothing like it. There's nothing like it,
Speaker 1: because I feel like if you're going to come in
Speaker 1: and you feel like like I didn't realize, like I
Speaker 1: didn't shower today, or like I I don't like this
Speaker 1: isn't my day. I do sometimes like to lean into it,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Put the hat on, bitch.
Speaker 1: Put that T shirt on. Jimmy. I have a Jimmy
Speaker 1: Jimmy Buffett T shirt. Absolutely, I rocket, Absolutely, I love
Speaker 1: a jogger with a maybe a crop sweatshirt and a hat.
Speaker 1: You know, where do you like to go to vacation? Well,
Speaker 1: my family vacation. Where I'm going with this vacation. Growing up,
Speaker 1: we drill. This was before whom it was safe. We
Speaker 1: drove down to like far down the Mexican several times
Speaker 1: a year with a big trailer full of ship, and
Speaker 1: he would just like stop at various Mexican villages and
Speaker 1: we would you know, fish and eat lobster and get
Speaker 1: stomach sick, and you know, it was good. That sounds
Speaker 1: it sounds outrageous, very cool. Yeah, then we had to
Speaker 1: stop when things start to get going down. But yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: do you ever go to I don't know, Disneyland, Yes,
Speaker 1: he did, he phil about that. I love Disneylan. You
Speaker 1: probably guess that from who I am. That's why I asked. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you were so close to Anna, I was so you
Speaker 1: had a season pass Um, only I didn't actually because
Speaker 1: my parents hated it. Parents hated it. Yeah, but our
Speaker 1: best family friends loved it, so I got to all
Speaker 1: the time with them. And then I had the shady
Speaker 1: older boyfriend once that bought me a season pass and
Speaker 1: we would like go along in high school. It was weird.
Speaker 1: I wish times though, Matt, what a season passed can
Speaker 1: be a trap in a prison, saying maybe Blair's ex
Speaker 1: boyfriend was trying to keep her close by buying her
Speaker 1: a season pass. Oh my god, it's like when it's
Speaker 1: like when you think your boyfriend might leave you, so
Speaker 1: you like buy a house. Yeah, you get pregnant. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I guess we should talk about Kylie. But Bige, it's
Speaker 1: almost like it was planned. Okay, so much happened this
Speaker 1: year where I had to come to face reality, which
Speaker 1: has been you know, the cloak has been with you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: for sure. I mean we definitely have had to hear. Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: I might be by um and I have a type.
Speaker 1: I thought you were going to say I might be biased,
Speaker 1: and you had to catch your breath. But you feel
Speaker 1: that I might be buying and I was like, by
Speaker 1: and by I've never with women a woman, but I'm
Speaker 1: attractive and no, but it's horrible because I see them
Speaker 1: through the male gaze, which is you're not alone, you're
Speaker 1: not alone. I like these women with huge asses and
Speaker 1: huge debts, like insane, which also makes me sick and
Speaker 1: Toppert it is a Joe because I spend my whole
Speaker 1: life like wanting to be so thin, and now these
Speaker 1: women that I want to fuck, joe't look anything like this.
Speaker 1: You know this body that I wanted to hate so
Speaker 1: bad that that's it's your, that's just your, what you're
Speaker 1: attracted to, that's all just equilibrating. And I think it's okay.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't. I wouldn't see that as you
Speaker 1: looking at other women through the male gaze. I don't
Speaker 1: think that. I also think everyone in their heart is
Speaker 1: disgusting if if you saw it the way that I
Speaker 1: literally will be walking on the street and when I
Speaker 1: see a hot guy I will turn around and watch
Speaker 1: them walk away like it's crazy. I'm bad. I should
Speaker 1: be a girl is skinney with small I should be
Speaker 1: in jail one time. I I literally one time. So
Speaker 1: Jonathan Graff on the street and Jonathan Groff is my dream,
Speaker 1: Like I do. I am in love with them, every one,
Speaker 1: and I was. He was walking past me on the
Speaker 1: street and I literally like have looking and he was
Speaker 1: walking down the street and I just stopped and watched.
Speaker 1: It was so bad. I was like, if anyone saw
Speaker 1: this right now, or if he turned around and saw
Speaker 1: me like literally stopped on University place, like just like
Speaker 1: literally gawking, I would I should be in prison. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I should be straight up and should yeah, But it's
Speaker 1: crazy because like you think about like these straight men
Speaker 1: and like the way they like when whenever a straight
Speaker 1: man is like looking at a woman or talking at
Speaker 1: a woman, I give him the dirtiest look. I'm like,
Speaker 1: excuse me, we can all you're disgusting. Meanwhile, there's me
Speaker 1: like staring at Jonathan Gross like as you know when
Speaker 1: gay men do it too. I fucking hate it. Yeah
Speaker 1: I should. I'll look over it like a pack of days,
Speaker 1: like like low tea on Fire Island. I'll be like,
Speaker 1: you animal, we are animals, though, I want to say
Speaker 1: rule number one culture, we are animals though. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: don't want to discriminate against skinny women. All I'm saying though,
Speaker 1: is that you better show me your papers as natural oh,
Speaker 1: show me the papers. Just kidding. No, I celebrate you
Speaker 1: and your fast natalisms. But here's the deal. I feel
Speaker 1: like my type is personally changing to where now I
Speaker 1: can't even say that I have one. I just literally
Speaker 1: that is and that's that. And you know, oh boys,
Speaker 1: I have to disagree you have a type. No, my
Speaker 1: type historically husband charisma, X factor, X factor X factor.
Speaker 1: There is no rhymer reason our. She loves stars, stars,
Speaker 1: But that's not a type that's on a physicality. No,
Speaker 1: because then, like all my grodfriends like really, you know,
Speaker 1: and then and then I'm like, but I just I'm
Speaker 1: so connected. Yeah, the genasi can take it a long way.
Speaker 1: It's why whenever, It's why whenever I watched The Voice,
Speaker 1: I get a woody for Adam Levine. Yeah. I absolutely
Speaker 1: didn't even care for him until I saw that show
Speaker 1: and then I saw the humanity. Yeah I saw, I
Speaker 1: saw the ch I know the the w Yeah. I
Speaker 1: love Adam Vine, I do. But can I say I've
Speaker 1: actually been jerking it to Adam L. Vine since a
Speaker 1: young age. I love Maroon five. I'm ironically I want
Speaker 1: to say that and expose myself to the listeners. Did
Speaker 1: you ever see the video for this love. I love
Speaker 1: it and I love that song. Okay, when he's like,
Speaker 1: because I'm not judging, I used to I was obsessed
Speaker 1: with it. Won't be seen before long their second album. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was really good. Talked about him, I'll killer no filler,
Speaker 1: but I just I want to keep going. I yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I acted to him. Why why don't you know about him?
Speaker 1: And of course we know that. I'm leavin is like literally,
Speaker 1: like to anyone with a sense, pretty much a national punchline.
Speaker 1: But sure, sure, go on. No, he's celebrated the world
Speaker 1: over here, right, But like to our comedian friends, like
Speaker 1: you say, Adam Levine in her room and literally everyone laughs. No,
Speaker 1: I don't think that's necessarily true. I love how these
Speaker 1: people who like sleep on trash bags are laughing at Adam,
Speaker 1: Platinum artists, merrit to a model with a gorgeous baby.
Speaker 1: I mean, we're no position, You're right, Blair, We're no
Speaker 1: position to laugh at him. I don't. I don't think
Speaker 1: that happened. Can you talk about your feelings about Adam
Speaker 1: Levine and your things about us saying we like him? Well, first,
Speaker 1: I think I'm trying to negotiate two things. One my
Speaker 1: overall indifference towards Adam leaving, like I don't care that
Speaker 1: he exists anymore, and to whether or not that it's
Speaker 1: like creeping into like full on like distaste because I
Speaker 1: feel like him on the Voice. Granted I haven't seen
Speaker 1: that much of the Voice, but man, I watched the
Speaker 1: last night, the premiere episode, and it was I loved
Speaker 1: it and was so moved. But all I care about
Speaker 1: the only person I care about I don't even say
Speaker 1: Miley because whatever I like Miley. The only person I
Speaker 1: care about is Jennifer Hudson, and she's only been on
Speaker 1: this season's judgment. I think it's really good. She does
Speaker 1: it like every other couple of seasons, So this year
Speaker 1: it's Blake and Adam do every single season, and the
Speaker 1: girls rotated out. So right now it's Miley Cyrus and
Speaker 1: Jennifer Hudson and next fall, next spring, and the next
Speaker 1: season is going to be Kelly Clarkson and Alicia Key,
Speaker 1: and then I don't know what they're doing the year
Speaker 1: after that, but I believe Gwen Stefani will be back.
Speaker 1: I think the girls now we're going to be in
Speaker 1: rotation unless Jennifer Hudson or Kelly Clarkson are like huge
Speaker 1: hits and then they'll keep them. But Christina Aguilera too
Speaker 1: comes back. Yeah, the fucking drama of the chair spin. Yeah, genius,
Speaker 1: it's a dramatic Christie Aguilera. I mean not thank you.
Speaker 1: I always I always give respect christ Agilera because she
Speaker 1: was truly it for me when I was like set
Speaker 1: eight years old. Okay, she came along when there wasn't
Speaker 1: a pump star with any boy gusto, with any pipes.
Speaker 1: But I mean, truly, there's no place, there is just
Speaker 1: nothing behind those eyes there you go, I think there is,
Speaker 1: and I think it's and you know, mean this score.
Speaker 1: The score has been officially settled. At Christie Cello and
Speaker 1: Matailane show Battle of the Diva's there was a Brittany
Speaker 1: versus Christina show. Matt represented Christina, I represented Brittany. I
Speaker 1: roundly lost. I want I am ashamed. But Matt's argument
Speaker 1: was Matt's whole thing was very positive, was very ad hominem.
Speaker 1: It was very personally. I came out as a proud slut.
Speaker 1: But you just sex positive, talented, talented bit, which is great,
Speaker 1: which is one thing but it's another thing entirely for
Speaker 1: you to attack me as someone who you called me
Speaker 1: old and irrelevant. Bone is famously younger than me, And
Speaker 1: Matt's whole argument was that I was I like Brittany
Speaker 1: was old, and somehow he wants no, no, no no. I.
Speaker 1: First of all, I wasn't. It was entirely an argument
Speaker 1: about my own and Christina's own, which is positive. And
Speaker 1: Britney Spears said she was a virgin and was a
Speaker 1: liar because her career would have dramatically changed if the
Speaker 1: second she said she lost her virginity. She was. She
Speaker 1: was looking out for herself and you cannot falter for that.
Speaker 1: I can fault you for calling me old. How dare you?
Speaker 1: You look so shut up? Shut you look like a
Speaker 1: fresh daisy. I had no idea what I was bringing up.
Speaker 1: I should have known from the heart eye contact that
Speaker 1: Matt gave me when the name Christina first left my lips. Claire,
Speaker 1: here's the thing. The fact of the matter is the
Speaker 1: show is over and the votes have been tallied, and
Speaker 1: I fucking won and Christina fucking one. So unless he
Speaker 1: wants a rematch with another pair of pop stars, that's
Speaker 1: gonna have to be vones across the bear. The fact
Speaker 1: that he couldn't bring it home for Brittany, I'm mad.
Speaker 1: I just want to say, at least Brittany doesn't feel
Speaker 1: the deep lacking within herself to do a every twenty
Speaker 1: seconds to make up for some sort of deep, deep,
Speaker 1: gaping emotional hole inside. Is one big emotional bitch. Can't
Speaker 1: even walk by herself. Look on her Instagram, walks on
Speaker 1: her fucking hands across football fields. Can Christina do that? No,
Speaker 1: Christina has to going on the rolling chair. Who life
Speaker 1: sliding through the roof? Oh my god, that's a diva,
Speaker 1: Ny Spears. Look at her Instagram, look at her fashion shows.
Speaker 1: You'll see a lot has been resurrected and not the
Speaker 1: kinny body, which is not how I rate success. You
Speaker 1: know what, Let's table this conversation. Let's move on. Let's
Speaker 1: move on. I don't think so, honey, Now, Blair, this
Speaker 1: is a segment in our show which has actually been
Speaker 1: um come to be known as one of the more
Speaker 1: popular segments of our show, one of the only Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was one of the only segments of our show.
Speaker 1: We tried another one once and we didn't like doing it,
Speaker 1: and so we have. I don't think so, honey. It's
Speaker 1: one minute to reel against culture, and um it's our
Speaker 1: time to go negative and Bowen, I think that you
Speaker 1: should start since I've famously started the last of course dozens.
Speaker 1: Will you keep? Will you keep time? I will? I
Speaker 1: will keep time. I'm happy to do that, and this
Speaker 1: is Bowen yangs. I don't think so, honey, and it's
Speaker 1: time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Soft veggie burger's, bitch.
Speaker 1: I ordered as a veggie burger from Dumbo Kitchen right
Speaker 1: around the corner from where we record after the gym
Speaker 1: because I wanted a healthy meal. And look the second
Speaker 1: I bit down into it, the fucking burger patties gush
Speaker 1: out from the sides like a fucking gusher. It's i'd
Speaker 1: structurally unsound food and I cannot be made to eat
Speaker 1: something like that that will just fall apart and then
Speaker 1: just out of the architecture to be a real food,
Speaker 1: a real burger, Honey. I want the illusion of a
Speaker 1: real burger, and you are not giving me that illusion.
Speaker 1: You are not making me feel like I'm eating an
Speaker 1: actual burger, but I'm actually eating something much healthier and bitch,
Speaker 1: I want to eat a healthy meal, and you're making
Speaker 1: me feel like a fool, like a foolish fool for
Speaker 1: eating a veggie burger. I want to put a fucking
Speaker 1: egg in that so you can seal the whole thing
Speaker 1: together after you fry it. Because bitch, I don't know
Speaker 1: who your cooks are back there, but they are not
Speaker 1: five seconds. They are not bringing on the bacon, which
Speaker 1: I love because it's meat. Bitch, vegetables in general, an
Speaker 1: attack on veggie burgers that are too soft? Too soft?
Speaker 1: Has that happened to you? Guys? Um I call apart.
Speaker 1: I eat just a regular burger, so do I, but
Speaker 1: bitch every now and that, I want to be a
Speaker 1: little good for myself. Same with me. I like to
Speaker 1: funk with the veggie burger or even though I'm famously
Speaker 1: a meet eater, and if they serve one, I'm not pleasing.
Speaker 1: Thank you. How to be a beefy woman? A full
Speaker 1: burger here? Okay? I have Matt Rodgers is I don't
Speaker 1: think so, honey as time starts now, I don't think so.
Speaker 1: Laundry machines, bitch, you need to start taking dollars. Stop
Speaker 1: at laundry machines in this in this quarters only. First
Speaker 1: of all, bitch, how come we haven't updated it so
Speaker 1: that I can't use change to build up to the
Speaker 1: amount you need to use. Why is the course only, bitch?
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. Everyone is on the dollar now,
Speaker 1: the world is on the dollar. They're not on the quarter.
Speaker 1: It is time to end this plague on America which
Speaker 1: is causing us to go down to our local stores,
Speaker 1: are local delis, and ask them to change out our
Speaker 1: dollars for quarters. It's inconveniencing them, it's inconveniencing us. It's
Speaker 1: slowing down the process of getting our clothes washed and dry.
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. I want a machine that
Speaker 1: takes my single dollar, and I want a machine that
Speaker 1: takes my five dollar bill, and eventually I want a
Speaker 1: dollar a machine that takes my with Harriet Tubman on it,
Speaker 1: I don't think that's one minute. Wow, you want to
Speaker 1: pay twenty dollars to a launder machine. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: I want the option to be able to put in
Speaker 1: any bill I choose and then spit back change properly.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's funny every time I have to
Speaker 1: go down there and be using quarters. I don't think
Speaker 1: it's funny at all. And also quarters, here's the thing
Speaker 1: with them, as I found out today, sometimes the metal
Speaker 1: of the quarter gets a little melted and misshapen, and
Speaker 1: you put it in the machine and it gets stuck
Speaker 1: in the machine because the quarter isn't a perfect shape,
Speaker 1: and so we need to do away with this quarters,
Speaker 1: think you, Matt, that is his platform. Okay, this is
Speaker 1: the George Clooney for president, by the way, he might run. Okay, um,
Speaker 1: this is whereas I don't think so, honey, Blay are
Speaker 1: you ready? This is Blair's I don't think so, honey.
Speaker 1: Time starts now. I don't think so, honey. Face time? Really, Oh,
Speaker 1: you think that you're gonna get to see my face
Speaker 1: in the interior of my own home when I'm locked
Speaker 1: up in my dungeon trying to be personal with myself.
Speaker 1: You think you can fucking FaceTime? Oh yeah, Like I
Speaker 1: don't have aquifer all over by dried out skin, so
Speaker 1: that it is in healing time, it's in repair, it's
Speaker 1: in repost. You want to violate me by seeing me
Speaker 1: with my aquafor face and my hair in this country
Speaker 1: and for my lips too. Don't you even forget about No,
Speaker 1: that is what text messages for. You're trying to be
Speaker 1: a You're trying to violate me. You're trying to see
Speaker 1: me when I'm not supposed to be seen, when I'm
Speaker 1: not trying to have my face out in the world.
Speaker 1: My face is always out in the world. I don't
Speaker 1: think so, honey, FaceTime, FaceTime, don't say sammy bitch. That's
Speaker 1: one minute. Oh, I think you you really took that
Speaker 1: to task. Bit. You know you are being egregious. Quote
Speaker 1: flair sock. You know who always wants to FaceTime the
Speaker 1: bitch to my right, my friends want to do it,
Speaker 1: and he face times me on the do lad day,
Speaker 1: La who on the doll the d day? But you
Speaker 1: always data who on the dot day. I'm the more
Speaker 1: vulnerable one in that situation. I look like a fucking
Speaker 1: job with the java. Every time we do FaceTime, I
Speaker 1: comment on how bad I look? You look fine, I'm horrendous.
Speaker 1: You have your jawline is discernible when we're on FaceTime
Speaker 1: and I collapse my fucking jaw into my rib. I
Speaker 1: have very tired and black eyes. And when and whenever
Speaker 1: I look into the face of FaceTime, I have to
Speaker 1: make an ugly face because I have to lean in. No,
Speaker 1: you don't. You shouldn't be looking at your own face
Speaker 1: when you're on FaceTime. You should be looking at the
Speaker 1: face that's across the receiver, that's on the screen. Bitch.
Speaker 1: When I'm trying to connect with a loved one, I
Speaker 1: don't want that connection to be mired what my own
Speaker 1: thank you. It's so distracting. I can't even I just
Speaker 1: want to connect with my friend on the pure level
Speaker 1: and not have to see what's going down. I'm true,
Speaker 1: I'm a Texter. Guys, I don't know. You're never going
Speaker 1: to fully be known to your loved ones without FaceTime.
Speaker 1: That's all I think. Do you FaceTime your parents time? Bitch?
Speaker 1: Rosebud told me something last night when I decided to
Speaker 1: take the night off and how will have a Rosebud
Speaker 1: Baker incredible community and friend, um and woman, And she
Speaker 1: faced on me when she knew I was very vulnerable
Speaker 1: eight episodes into Transparent, without even knowing what happened. Told
Speaker 1: me and I said, you know, you don't I don't
Speaker 1: like it when I faced on me, and she said,
Speaker 1: but think about like this when you were eight years old.
Speaker 1: Did you think that you would ever be able to
Speaker 1: be in different places than your friend and see them
Speaker 1: on a small device where you're talking to them? And
Speaker 1: my world broke open and I was like, you are
Speaker 1: seeing the beauty in life. See. But that's that's really
Speaker 1: you're being gregious, because that's to say that just because
Speaker 1: technology is there, that we should use it. That's to
Speaker 1: say that's like saying, hey, can you would you ever
Speaker 1: even imagine drones? Yeah? But this isn't a positive way
Speaker 1: that surely I was being manipulated, correct, I think I
Speaker 1: don't know about the world. You know what tech, the
Speaker 1: tech world right now is going through an identity crisis,
Speaker 1: but what will never go away is engineers building good
Speaker 1: products that make people happy. FaceTime makes everybody the world
Speaker 1: over happy, honey, you know, and no, let me finish.
Speaker 1: It's a product that is bringing into the world YouTube,
Speaker 1: pillery and pillaring. This this landmark technological achievement. Steve Jobs
Speaker 1: unveiling the iPhone four. Can you remember remember when the
Speaker 1: earth moved that day, how the world shook, how the
Speaker 1: tech tonics of the world shifted, And you guys are
Speaker 1: you guys are desecrating that legacy and I won't have
Speaker 1: any I don't update my phone until I absolutely have to.
Speaker 1: And that's my goddamn progative. Hillary Clinton says we shouldn't
Speaker 1: run from technology. We should find out a way to
Speaker 1: use it that doesn't harm us. That's paraphrasing. You're desecrating
Speaker 1: words of Hillary Clinton, my hero. She also said it
Speaker 1: takes a town, It takes a town. She also said, um,
Speaker 1: after Trump gave his inauguration speech, quote that was some
Speaker 1: weird ship, said George W. Bush. I had to agree,
Speaker 1: which might be the whole line of the fucking book.
Speaker 1: It's amazing. That's real, Like she got real and she
Speaker 1: love it and I loved. I loved when she quoted
Speaker 1: other people calling her a bit because I was like, yes,
Speaker 1: you never did this before, you're doing it now. I
Speaker 1: love it. Okay, here we go. Okay, So this has
Speaker 1: been an amazing episode. I think this episode has been
Speaker 1: really eye opening. And it was real in parts, and
Speaker 1: it was tender in parts, and it was hilarious in parts,
Speaker 1: and it was so funny and we got into some
Speaker 1: little fights. Yeah, and also culture is about um, you know,
Speaker 1: disagreeing and then coming to a certain place and then
Speaker 1: moving on from there, it's like a lot of fun
Speaker 1: and debate. Are you are you a debater? No? Furthest
Speaker 1: furthest I'm like, I'm exhausted. Where do you guys get
Speaker 1: the fucking energy. I'd rather just disagree in private. I
Speaker 1: feel different because that's Christina Aguilera once said, there's for
Speaker 1: Meggan mere modulated mid phrase. That's cool, there's making me fin,
Speaker 1: there's Megan me fi loved that. Love that. What's the
Speaker 1: first word of that? Booby tripping over my body? That
Speaker 1: would be weird. Hey, hey, you know what, what we
Speaker 1: ate all the eminem's. We didn't even break into these
Speaker 1: oatmeal reasons though. But that's okay. We're gonna go eat
Speaker 1: the rest of these cookies. Guy eyes. We thank Blair.
Speaker 1: It was the time of my life and my biggest
Speaker 1: I'm just talking about the Goga documentary, but you know what,
Speaker 1: that's for another episode. Yeah, just give a three word
Speaker 1: review each of us. Yeah, that's my three word review
Speaker 1: is Dogga is each of us? My heart exploded? Great?
Speaker 1: Love it my review? Mhm, five ft two. I was
Speaker 1: going to say rock star dream, but then I was like,
Speaker 1: that's all the two words five ft two. I said
Speaker 1: the first line of the documentary should have been you
Speaker 1: know I'm only five ft two. People think I'm a
Speaker 1: lot taller. Stupid. I thought that would have been hilarious.
Speaker 1: The actual first lines of the movie are her first
Speaker 1: words are Taylor and I are in a fight right now.
Speaker 1: So that sucks that. Get totally stoned and watch it again?
Speaker 1: Really good. Oh, I'm for sure gonna watch it. What
Speaker 1: about when she was like, took off her top and
Speaker 1: she's like, sorry, I just I feel more comfortable. I like,
Speaker 1: come on, I was like, I'm so, I'm going with
Speaker 1: you everywhere you want to go, and I just feel
Speaker 1: more comfortable. Like, no, a producer told you to do that, Gaga,
Speaker 1: It's fine. I was like, well, at least you know
Speaker 1: what my heroes nipples look like. Oh. I phoned on
Speaker 1: to prayer, trying to make the worst show me the
Speaker 1: way to cut through all this one out. I got
Speaker 1: a dreadmillion reasons to walk away, Baby, I just leave
Speaker 1: you one good, one, good one to tell me that
Speaker 1: you'd be the good one, good one, babe, I just
Speaker 1: need one good one to for your consideration. Grammy's two thousand,
Speaker 1: seventeen ye forever, this has been a Forever Dog Production
Speaker 1: Executive produced by Brett Boham, Joe Silio, and Alex Ramsey.
Speaker 1: For more original podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Podcasts dot
Speaker 1: com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify,
Speaker 1: or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the
Speaker 1: latest Forever Dog news by following us on Twitter and
Speaker 1: Instagram at forever Dog Team, and liking our page on Facebook.