1 00:00:00,960 --> 00:00:04,280 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercam. I'm a mother of four, 2 00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:08,479 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hart Hunger. 3 00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:11,799 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, practicing physician and blogger. On 4 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: the side, we are two working parents who love our 5 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:17,880 Speaker 1: careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:21,560 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:25,360 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,240 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:33,120 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:33,240 --> 00:00:36,400 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode ninety one, which is 11 00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: first airing at the end of April twenty nineteen, so 12 00:00:40,680 --> 00:00:43,839 Speaker 1: for both of us, spring break is now over. So 13 00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:46,519 Speaker 1: Sarah had gone on a Disney cruise, which I know 14 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:49,239 Speaker 1: we've been talking about in some previous episodes. It was 15 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:52,839 Speaker 1: a big deal, very exciting. So let's get the recap 16 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:58,160 Speaker 1: from Sarah to you understand. I guess I have to 17 00:00:58,200 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: close the loop here, and you know what I got 18 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:04,480 Speaker 1: to say. I in the days of like sponsored blogging, 19 00:01:04,760 --> 00:01:07,400 Speaker 1: I find that it's actually somewhat hard to find really 20 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:10,680 Speaker 1: frank and honest travel reviews because typical at the bottom, 21 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:13,759 Speaker 1: it says something like, this trip was comped, but all 22 00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:18,720 Speaker 1: my opinions are my own. Yeah, right, So anyway, this 23 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,760 Speaker 1: trip was not comped. We paid for every penny of 24 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:23,880 Speaker 1: it and they did not. There was no no official 25 00:01:24,400 --> 00:01:27,720 Speaker 1: review process or anything. So it's just my honest impressions. 26 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:29,520 Speaker 1: I don't know if it was a big deal. Actually, 27 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:31,000 Speaker 1: in some ways it was not a big deal because 28 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:32,880 Speaker 1: that was the beauty of it for us. We live, 29 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:36,080 Speaker 1: you know, thirty minutes from the port, so this didn't 30 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:38,120 Speaker 1: involve a flight like most of our trips do. It 31 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:41,280 Speaker 1: didn't involve transporting of car seats, which was awesome. We 32 00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:44,080 Speaker 1: just drove to the port. We had booked this about 33 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:46,800 Speaker 1: six months in advance, and it was the idea of 34 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,120 Speaker 1: our really close friends who have two kids the ages 35 00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:52,920 Speaker 1: of Cameron and Genevieve, and a buggets along with them too, 36 00:01:52,920 --> 00:01:56,240 Speaker 1: so it works out nicely. And yeah, so we just 37 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 1: drove there and then got on the boat. Is very 38 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:02,279 Speaker 1: simple and we had a really nice time together. People 39 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:03,880 Speaker 1: were kind of wanting to know, you know, what does 40 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:06,400 Speaker 1: that cost When you have a family with three children. 41 00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,720 Speaker 1: You have two options. You can either do a suite, 42 00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:12,040 Speaker 1: which makes it very expensive, or you can do two 43 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:14,760 Speaker 1: adjoining rooms in a sort of mid tier or lower 44 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:16,959 Speaker 1: tier room. I think we didn't go for the lowest tier, 45 00:02:17,000 --> 00:02:18,920 Speaker 1: which was completely windowless. We went for the one with 46 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: like a big porthole, and it worked out great. In fact, 47 00:02:20,960 --> 00:02:23,320 Speaker 1: my husband said, I wouldn't have wanted a balcony because 48 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:25,200 Speaker 1: we would have been terrified about what our kids might 49 00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:27,600 Speaker 1: have tried to do on it. So the total cost 50 00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:29,680 Speaker 1: of the cruise was something like I think sixty five 51 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 1: hundred including all tips, all everything, and that covered really 52 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,000 Speaker 1: four and a half days. I mean, in many ways 53 00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 1: five days, because when you were recovering from a cruise, 54 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 1: you still kind of feel like that's part of the experience. 55 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:46,880 Speaker 1: I'm not sure if I we didn't get home until like, yeah, 56 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,600 Speaker 1: everyone was sufficiently tired out by the crew, so it 57 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:51,640 Speaker 1: sort of felt like part of the package deal anyway, 58 00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:54,520 Speaker 1: So that is not a cheap vacation. I think there 59 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:56,840 Speaker 1: are also pricier vacations. And the fact that we didn't 60 00:02:56,840 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 1: have to buy plane tickets or any kind of rental 61 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:02,040 Speaker 1: vehicle meant that spending more on the crews itself wasn't 62 00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:04,880 Speaker 1: such a big deal. And you know what, for little kids, 63 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:06,960 Speaker 1: it's a very nice option, Laura. I think that you 64 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:08,840 Speaker 1: should do it while you're You should do it sooner 65 00:03:08,919 --> 00:03:10,720 Speaker 1: rather than later, because I think that as they get 66 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:13,280 Speaker 1: older it's going to be maybe not as good fit 67 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 1: for older kids. Although I think there were a lot 68 00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:18,320 Speaker 1: of tweens and teens having very nice time. The kids 69 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:21,400 Speaker 1: club is very nicely done. There's a lot of supervision, 70 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,920 Speaker 1: there's a lot to do. Both my kids, well, Cameron 71 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,519 Speaker 1: like begged to go there. He probably would have spent 72 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 1: his entire trip there if he had been allowed, and 73 00:03:28,680 --> 00:03:32,000 Speaker 1: Annabel didn't mind going. It is still challenging to travel 74 00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,480 Speaker 1: with a toddler because yes, they do have nursery childcare, 75 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,720 Speaker 1: you have to reserve it, but your toddler's not going 76 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,160 Speaker 1: to necessarily be jumping up and down to go to that. 77 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:43,400 Speaker 1: So we did do two nights without her. One of 78 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,720 Speaker 1: the nights we went out to the sort of fancy 79 00:03:45,760 --> 00:03:47,840 Speaker 1: restaurant on the boat, which was really fun. But I 80 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:49,880 Speaker 1: got this text good way through that was like we 81 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:52,280 Speaker 1: had her name in there, a certain nickname of Viva, 82 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:55,360 Speaker 1: and it was like Viva Hunger is crying and I, oh, no, 83 00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: so you know, but they text you about a child 84 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:02,560 Speaker 1: crying that's a little I think they just want you 85 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:04,640 Speaker 1: to know, like it's not like you have to get 86 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:07,080 Speaker 1: your child, but you know, it's just that your kids 87 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,000 Speaker 1: are still going to be their ages that they're in 88 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,240 Speaker 1: no matter what kind of a situation that you're in. 89 00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:15,720 Speaker 1: There aren't that many dedicated toddler spaces. There's a couple 90 00:04:15,800 --> 00:04:19,120 Speaker 1: I would have liked more, and I highly recommend going 91 00:04:19,120 --> 00:04:20,520 Speaker 1: with friends because I think that was part of the 92 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,159 Speaker 1: fun for us, especially with the toddler Like, you know, 93 00:04:23,160 --> 00:04:24,839 Speaker 1: because there's going to be blocks of time where you're 94 00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 1: just hanging out and watching your kid run around, and 95 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,640 Speaker 1: if you could turn it into a little like extended 96 00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:30,880 Speaker 1: play date, I think that kind of adds to it. 97 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:33,880 Speaker 1: And then finally just sort of the service and quote 98 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:37,040 Speaker 1: unquote magic aspect. Disney's really good at that, Like they're 99 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:40,400 Speaker 1: really good. They there was always like a character available 100 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,719 Speaker 1: just at that right moment, and kids would just be 101 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,400 Speaker 1: delighted by it, especially Genevieve actually, which was adorable to see, 102 00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,960 Speaker 1: and this very kind staff who seemed like they really 103 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:53,400 Speaker 1: liked their jobs. Many of them were like working for 104 00:04:53,440 --> 00:04:55,440 Speaker 1: Disney for eight years, twelve years, So I think the 105 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:58,479 Speaker 1: you know, the way they treat them must be pretty good, 106 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:03,440 Speaker 1: and they do. Actually FYI, they sort of force, not 107 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,760 Speaker 1: force you. They take up tips automatically, and it's a 108 00:05:05,760 --> 00:05:08,800 Speaker 1: pretty sizable percentage split among the person who takes care 109 00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:12,159 Speaker 1: of your room, your server, I think, like the dining 110 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:15,160 Speaker 1: room director. And you get this letter that's like you're 111 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:16,960 Speaker 1: getting fifty dollars are going to this person and blah 112 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,520 Speaker 1: blah blah are going to this person, and you're allowed 113 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:20,479 Speaker 1: to go to the front desk and change it by 114 00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:24,000 Speaker 1: the pathway at least resistance. That's generous tips. And honestly, 115 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:25,919 Speaker 1: we had such a nice time that I've felt no 116 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:29,159 Speaker 1: reason to go against what they had suggested. So you 117 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:32,640 Speaker 1: do end up thinking them whether you say, I don't 118 00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:34,080 Speaker 1: think you want to be that person going to the 119 00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:36,200 Speaker 1: front desk, be like no, no, no, no, no, we're 120 00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:41,200 Speaker 1: to do exactly. Don't want my style. Not my style. 121 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:42,760 Speaker 1: I mean, I would say, I guess if you had 122 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,920 Speaker 1: like a bad experience or someone wasn't nice to you, 123 00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:47,760 Speaker 1: that might be something, But no, we had a great experience. Yeah, yeah, 124 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:49,560 Speaker 1: was there anything I mean, given that this is the 125 00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:52,800 Speaker 1: unbiased review, is there anything you've warned people about or 126 00:05:53,560 --> 00:05:55,680 Speaker 1: well just that your toddlers are still going to be toddlers, 127 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,920 Speaker 1: Like you're not going to be relaxing, because you're still 128 00:05:57,920 --> 00:06:00,919 Speaker 1: going to be chasing your sixteen month around. And that 129 00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: may be one of the themes of this episode as well. 130 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:06,479 Speaker 1: I think it's important to think about the weather. We 131 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:08,440 Speaker 1: really lucked out. But I kept saying to Josh, like, 132 00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: if this was rainy and stormy, I know I wouldn't 133 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,599 Speaker 1: be like so happy. It happened to be gorgeous, like 134 00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:18,760 Speaker 1: not too hot crystal blue skies, but that's clearly not guaranteed. 135 00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,560 Speaker 1: I would say. The food Actually again, even though this 136 00:06:22,600 --> 00:06:24,720 Speaker 1: is not sponsored, I was pleasantly surprised. I read a 137 00:06:24,800 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: number of really scathing reviews of the food, and I 138 00:06:27,640 --> 00:06:30,960 Speaker 1: was terrified. And I will say that Genevieve got a 139 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:34,200 Speaker 1: mysterious g I almost approximately three days after we got back. 140 00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:36,960 Speaker 1: The thing is that timeline doesn't totally make sense. That's 141 00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:40,600 Speaker 1: usually those bugs happen faster, exactly, and they're meticulous about 142 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:42,680 Speaker 1: making you like sanitize your hands when you go into 143 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 1: every single dining area. And I thought the food was 144 00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:47,160 Speaker 1: pretty decent. I mean I thought it was better actually, 145 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:51,279 Speaker 1: like more options than Disney World, so that's good to know, ycause, 146 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:53,840 Speaker 1: I mean the food at Disney World is not No, 147 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,880 Speaker 1: I'm not like it, like there are there are exceptions, 148 00:06:55,960 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 1: got to Boma and the Tusker House, like that's pretty good, 149 00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:02,320 Speaker 1: but most Disney food, Yeah, I am with you. Yeah, well, 150 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:04,800 Speaker 1: especially like the quick serve stuff. It was just no, 151 00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:06,800 Speaker 1: it was definitely a step up from that. That's good 152 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:09,440 Speaker 1: to know. Yeah, we were definitely considering that for a 153 00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,400 Speaker 1: future thing. And and it's good to know about going 154 00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 1: with another adult. I think what's going to wind up happening, 155 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:15,160 Speaker 1: and we may go in the summer, but it's just 156 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:18,000 Speaker 1: because when we have to, I mean there's no other option. 157 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:21,520 Speaker 1: You could go with family. I think I'm going to 158 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:25,720 Speaker 1: take my mother in law actually, and uh so we 159 00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 1: got to figure out how we'll how we'll do the rooms. 160 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:30,080 Speaker 1: I mean, obviously she she needs her Remnan room going 161 00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:33,720 Speaker 1: to make there were times of the grandparents on the trip, 162 00:07:33,760 --> 00:07:35,720 Speaker 1: so you may just need three rooms and you could 163 00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:38,000 Speaker 1: get too adjoining and then one that's you know, well, actually, 164 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,000 Speaker 1: I'm not sure my husband is going, and I don't think. 165 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: I don't know that Alex is going either. I think 166 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:43,480 Speaker 1: it may bee me. The three big kids and my 167 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:46,560 Speaker 1: mother in law. I think about Alex though, because honestly, 168 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:51,760 Speaker 1: he knowing his actually thrilled to be in there and 169 00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,480 Speaker 1: just live there. I know this is hard, but I 170 00:07:53,720 --> 00:07:56,320 Speaker 1: actually want to relax. And then I can't get like 171 00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:58,600 Speaker 1: the room out of Miranda because I worry about him 172 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,440 Speaker 1: leaping off of it. Yeah, so, I mean, I just 173 00:08:01,920 --> 00:08:04,800 Speaker 1: but he would love the kids club. The probably been there. 174 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:07,680 Speaker 1: That may be true, and it's free. It's like a 175 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:09,640 Speaker 1: you know, big benefit. I know, but if my husband 176 00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:11,360 Speaker 1: doesn't wind up going, maybe I was thinking about doing 177 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:14,240 Speaker 1: a long weekend one, right, they have one Friday to Monday, 178 00:08:14,280 --> 00:08:16,720 Speaker 1: and then he could be with Alex at home, you know, 179 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:24,960 Speaker 1: two of them. So uh yeah, no, we're we're but 180 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:27,600 Speaker 1: that won't be that won't be spring break. We are 181 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 1: we actually have spring break that we're recording this before 182 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:35,080 Speaker 1: spring break. And to remind listeners, it's been sort of like, 183 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:37,440 Speaker 1: what is Laura going to do? They haven't thought of anything. 184 00:08:37,800 --> 00:08:40,000 Speaker 1: Her husband's in charge of the plan, So tell us 185 00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 1: all what happened with that well in the past tense 186 00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:47,480 Speaker 1: and hopefully this is going to actually happen if we 187 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:51,240 Speaker 1: record before it. We're going to Saint Lucia, which I 188 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,719 Speaker 1: think is how you say it. We were saying Saint 189 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:56,040 Speaker 1: Lucia and then we heard recordings of it Saint Lucia. 190 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:58,840 Speaker 1: But yeah, it turns out you can fly direct there, 191 00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:03,240 Speaker 1: which is key my husband had. We had sort of 192 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:07,640 Speaker 1: determined like Caribbean Islands is probably the way to go. Wea, 193 00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:10,280 Speaker 1: it's easy, and so then it was a question where 194 00:09:10,320 --> 00:09:13,840 Speaker 1: can you fly direct and have like a resort that's 195 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,679 Speaker 1: got good kid options that we aren't going to hate. 196 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:21,720 Speaker 1: And then but the direct flight thing took us off 197 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:24,920 Speaker 1: on this whole tangent because then my husband found a 198 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:30,000 Speaker 1: resort on Nevis. Okay, what do we use the research resorts? 199 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:33,720 Speaker 1: Do you know? We just I was strongly suggesting we 200 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:37,839 Speaker 1: use We remember we had Henley Vasquez on a year 201 00:09:37,840 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 1: and a half ago, and she runs a company called Passported, 202 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:45,600 Speaker 1: which has sort of nicer family oriented travel, I guess, 203 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:48,760 Speaker 1: which is sort of what I'm always aiming for, you know. 204 00:09:49,280 --> 00:09:51,600 Speaker 1: And so she had lots of resort reviews of the Caribbean, 205 00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:54,640 Speaker 1: and so I was strongly suggesting one of those. The 206 00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:57,960 Speaker 1: problem it turns out I'm not a cheap vacationer. It 207 00:09:58,040 --> 00:10:01,640 Speaker 1: maybe that Henley's taste is even slightly higher than mine. 208 00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:04,840 Speaker 1: So so so this sent us off on this whole thing. 209 00:10:04,840 --> 00:10:06,440 Speaker 1: If I think my husband did not want to pay 210 00:10:06,440 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 1: for the Ritz Carlton, so then he was looking at 211 00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:12,160 Speaker 1: villas on Nevis because there's good diving there and he 212 00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:14,440 Speaker 1: wants to dive. But then it turns out you can't 213 00:10:14,480 --> 00:10:17,120 Speaker 1: get to Nevs. You'd you have to fly you fly 214 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,920 Speaker 1: to Saint kits but then there aren't even direct flights 215 00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,680 Speaker 1: to Saint Kitts, so we're gonna have to fly through 216 00:10:21,760 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: Charlotte and then take a boat over. And then it 217 00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 1: was like no, and then we're gonna fly home. You 218 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:29,559 Speaker 1: have this route out of San Martin's. I think you 219 00:10:29,679 --> 00:10:31,760 Speaker 1: have to take a boat to Sam Martans and then 220 00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:35,400 Speaker 1: fly direct back from Sam Martins. I was like, you know, 221 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:39,319 Speaker 1: this is like this is just wait, okay, even in 222 00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:41,480 Speaker 1: the beginning of the trip, it might be somewhat tolerable 223 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:44,199 Speaker 1: at the end with all four kids if you're like, oh, 224 00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:47,520 Speaker 1: let's begin our twenty hour journey now, that we'll be 225 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:49,120 Speaker 1: thinking about it the whole time too. Yeah, and the 226 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:51,080 Speaker 1: flight in the morning. It was in the morning for 227 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:52,600 Speaker 1: I think from Sam Martins, so we'd have to take 228 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,120 Speaker 1: the boat at some other and I'm like, you don't. 229 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 1: I don't think there's gonna be like a late night boat. 230 00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:58,720 Speaker 1: It's going to be, you know, a middle of the afternoon, 231 00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:01,240 Speaker 1: so you lose that whole day. And I don't know anyway, 232 00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:03,520 Speaker 1: So he was going back and forth on a million 233 00:11:03,559 --> 00:11:05,160 Speaker 1: different ways of how we can get in and out 234 00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:07,160 Speaker 1: of NEVS, and I was just like, all right, stop, 235 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:10,160 Speaker 1: which is a struggle because you know, you did sort 236 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:12,160 Speaker 1: of outsources to him. And then it was sort of like, 237 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:16,120 Speaker 1: well do I intervene? It wasn't even a question of 238 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,480 Speaker 1: whether I intervined because he was calling me every ten 239 00:11:18,559 --> 00:11:21,080 Speaker 1: minutes and it was a good thing in this case though, 240 00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:23,160 Speaker 1: which it turned out to be like it's like, well, 241 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 1: maybe I could charter a plane since there's six of us. 242 00:11:26,559 --> 00:11:30,400 Speaker 1: So I'm like, well, then let's don't pay for the 243 00:11:32,280 --> 00:11:34,840 Speaker 1: y for a private jet, like I know, this is 244 00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,200 Speaker 1: no it was those like tiny little planes. Like that's 245 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:39,600 Speaker 1: terrifying now I know. So and then I was like, okay, 246 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:42,600 Speaker 1: let's let's back up from the NEVIS idea. Is there 247 00:11:42,679 --> 00:11:46,040 Speaker 1: a second option that also has good diving in the 248 00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:52,480 Speaker 1: Caribbean And and so then he found this resort that 249 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,880 Speaker 1: was highly rated on like a parents dot com article 250 00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:58,040 Speaker 1: or something, which who knows, I mean maybe that they 251 00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:01,160 Speaker 1: took out ads in the magazine, not saying that maybe 252 00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:04,560 Speaker 1: Parents has a higher editorial standard than that. But anyway, 253 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:07,800 Speaker 1: this was something that was not as pricey as the 254 00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:11,440 Speaker 1: Ritz Carlton, but that we could then also fly direct 255 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:14,360 Speaker 1: from JFK. So we are going to drive to JFK, 256 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,480 Speaker 1: We are going to fly direct, spend a couple of 257 00:12:17,559 --> 00:12:23,600 Speaker 1: days Saint Lucia return also flying direct, and everyone's happy. 258 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,839 Speaker 1: So there's not a lot of Caribbean flights out of Philadelphia, 259 00:12:25,960 --> 00:12:28,280 Speaker 1: h There there are, but again, you know, we're booking 260 00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:31,240 Speaker 1: this for six people ten days before the flight, so 261 00:12:31,520 --> 00:12:35,240 Speaker 1: it's you know a lot of stuff was booked and 262 00:12:36,120 --> 00:12:40,960 Speaker 1: we're having trouble finding six seats. And anyway, it's as 263 00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:44,959 Speaker 1: listeners know, we're pro planning, but this works out. Yeah, 264 00:12:45,160 --> 00:12:49,320 Speaker 1: we're pro. This is gonna be great. I'm happy, I'm amazing. Yeah. No, 265 00:12:49,559 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 1: So future review coming of that, yeah later. Also non 266 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:58,360 Speaker 1: spawn not non sponsored exactly, but just cheaper than the 267 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:02,880 Speaker 1: red All right, Well, so this sort of segue is 268 00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:05,480 Speaker 1: into we were going to we want to do an 269 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:09,320 Speaker 1: episode on weekends. We'd also been talking about doing an 270 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:13,200 Speaker 1: episode on Toddler's We realize that the two are somewhat 271 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:17,520 Speaker 1: related in the sense of if you have a toddler, 272 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:21,360 Speaker 1: your weekends are very different. And I would extend toddler 273 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,840 Speaker 1: to around almost three to four, Like I was thinking 274 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:27,160 Speaker 1: in my mind, like where where does that moment stop, 275 00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,520 Speaker 1: And it's somewhere. I think it probably depends on the kid, 276 00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:32,599 Speaker 1: somewhere around four or three and a half when you 277 00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:35,480 Speaker 1: don't feel like you have to like physically hover over 278 00:13:35,559 --> 00:13:39,240 Speaker 1: them to prevent bodily harm, essentially every minute that they're awake, 279 00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:42,400 Speaker 1: every minute that they're awake. And the thing is, I 280 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:46,640 Speaker 1: sometimes I think what leads to people feeling a bit 281 00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:52,440 Speaker 1: crazed and harried on weekends is that sometimes this hovering 282 00:13:52,520 --> 00:13:56,240 Speaker 1: is not equitably split. And I think that having a 283 00:13:56,280 --> 00:14:00,760 Speaker 1: good conversation about how that hovering can be equity rely 284 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:05,520 Speaker 1: split is key to having a good weekend, because, unfortunately, 285 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:09,400 Speaker 1: if one party serves more of a primary parenting role, 286 00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:13,720 Speaker 1: party B may assume that Party A wishes to continue 287 00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 1: this role or just not think about it right because 288 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:18,720 Speaker 1: they're not used to serving that role during the week, 289 00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:21,760 Speaker 1: and this can lead to a lot of resentment, let's say, 290 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:24,320 Speaker 1: from Party A, who feels like he or she has 291 00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:27,120 Speaker 1: done this all week and would really like to pass 292 00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:30,640 Speaker 1: this over to Party B for a reasonable chunk of time. 293 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:34,400 Speaker 1: I can imagine that this is probably perhaps even a 294 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:39,160 Speaker 1: more difficult issue in families with only one working parent. Yeah, yeah, no, 295 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:44,280 Speaker 1: I agree, And sometimes some families are very good about it. 296 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:47,320 Speaker 1: I have definitely talked to a number of families where, 297 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,520 Speaker 1: you know, it's maybe a more traditional split, like you know, 298 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:52,040 Speaker 1: mom stays home with the kids and Saturday is sort 299 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:56,040 Speaker 1: of understood to be daddy day, right that go do 300 00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:58,720 Speaker 1: her stuff. You know, she doesn't have to ask, she 301 00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:01,880 Speaker 1: doesn't have to. It's just understood that Saturday is daddy day. 302 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:04,720 Speaker 1: And that's great. That can be an awesome, awesome split, 303 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:08,880 Speaker 1: you know, or reverse genders or same genders whatever like 304 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:11,600 Speaker 1: you know, but if one party is doing the bulk 305 00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:13,640 Speaker 1: of the childcare during the week, it might make sense 306 00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:16,760 Speaker 1: to designate one day during the weekend to be the 307 00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:20,000 Speaker 1: other parent in charge. But you know, when when both 308 00:15:20,040 --> 00:15:22,640 Speaker 1: parties sort of work as well and equally, and then 309 00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:26,960 Speaker 1: then it you know, sometimes gets you know, but it's 310 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,400 Speaker 1: good to have these conversations, because that is kind of 311 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:33,240 Speaker 1: leads into the idea of thinking through your weekends in general. 312 00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,280 Speaker 1: And when you do think through it and you talk 313 00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:38,600 Speaker 1: through it, you are allowing yourself to figure out, like, 314 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:40,920 Speaker 1: what do you really want to get out of it? 315 00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 1: And that doesn't even necessarily require an equitable split. In fact, 316 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:46,520 Speaker 1: there may be time that the family can be all together, 317 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:48,800 Speaker 1: and that works great too. There just has to be 318 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:51,800 Speaker 1: a thoughtful split so that each party can get what 319 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,920 Speaker 1: they want if possible, and in some cases that may 320 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:58,520 Speaker 1: require hiring outside help, and in some cases it won't. 321 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:02,400 Speaker 1: I've certainly had happy weekends either way. But I think 322 00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:04,680 Speaker 1: that the mistake a lot of people make is to, 323 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,840 Speaker 1: as we've talked about, kind of going and saying, oh, 324 00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:08,280 Speaker 1: I don't need a plan, I need to be free 325 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:11,480 Speaker 1: wheeling and spontaneous, and that ends up backfiring because you've 326 00:16:11,520 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 1: just kind of sentenced yourself to hovering over a toddler 327 00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 1: for sixty straight hours. Yes, which we love our toddlers. 328 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:21,600 Speaker 1: I love my toddler, but yeah, but this is you know, 329 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:25,200 Speaker 1: this is one of these things with time management where 330 00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:28,480 Speaker 1: you know, we've complained about productivity and time management books 331 00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:31,880 Speaker 1: that are basically like men Man's plain time management to me. 332 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:35,440 Speaker 1: But you can tell if somebody is not the primary 333 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:39,880 Speaker 1: parent of their young children, weekends are relaxing. And if 334 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:41,800 Speaker 1: you are, and I know that advice where it's like 335 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:45,280 Speaker 1: use your weekends for rejuven you know, it's like and 336 00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:47,840 Speaker 1: all you will just relax and work is stressful and 337 00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:51,160 Speaker 1: weekends are not. It's like, Okay, clearly somebody else is 338 00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:54,600 Speaker 1: watching your children or you know, you don't have any, 339 00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,360 Speaker 1: and you know, and that's fine, you know, but let's 340 00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:01,840 Speaker 1: acknowledge that as being the case. Now Sarah, you are 341 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,639 Speaker 1: still very much in the little kid year. Yeah, And 342 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:06,719 Speaker 1: I think as we created our notes, we realized that 343 00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:09,359 Speaker 1: this that's why this episode did serve such a you know, 344 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:13,080 Speaker 1: like a little bit of that toddler topic was addressed 345 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:15,480 Speaker 1: because our weekends are now kind of different because I 346 00:17:15,560 --> 00:17:17,879 Speaker 1: am like in it, I am still in it. And 347 00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:20,960 Speaker 1: as a reminder, so my children are six almost sixteen 348 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:25,879 Speaker 1: oh today, sixteen months, yeah, five and seven, and I 349 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,120 Speaker 1: know that if I just have the five and seven 350 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:29,800 Speaker 1: year olds, things would probably look extremely different than they 351 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:33,560 Speaker 1: do now. But I have my beautiful little toddler who 352 00:17:33,600 --> 00:17:35,760 Speaker 1: really does bring a lot of joy to our family 353 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:39,600 Speaker 1: and my life. But she does add a layer of complexity, 354 00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:42,760 Speaker 1: and I guess just work that wouldn't have been there otherwise. 355 00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,240 Speaker 1: And I think that because I have such a space 356 00:17:45,359 --> 00:17:47,920 Speaker 1: between that the you know, the three, and I did 357 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,880 Speaker 1: get a tiny taste of freedom. Cameron was almost four 358 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:53,040 Speaker 1: when she was born, and I think he was right 359 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:58,320 Speaker 1: at that point. Yeah, I really notice it was it 360 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:00,959 Speaker 1: was there and then it was gone. I knew that, 361 00:18:01,040 --> 00:18:04,280 Speaker 1: and I planned it and I chose it. But of course, yes, 362 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 1: of course, very happy to have our beautiful little children, 363 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:11,760 Speaker 1: but they do keep your weekends from being relaxing. So 364 00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:14,520 Speaker 1: understanding that you are still in the toddler years, what 365 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:19,240 Speaker 1: makes a good weekend a happy weekend for you? Yeah, 366 00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:22,640 Speaker 1: so I had this sort of ingredient list, and you know, 367 00:18:22,920 --> 00:18:25,200 Speaker 1: one of the main keys before I even get into 368 00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:28,719 Speaker 1: what I like to do, is to make a strategy 369 00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,960 Speaker 1: to use nap time well, because other than when she 370 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:34,800 Speaker 1: goes to bed, that's the only others of guaranteed downtime 371 00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:37,440 Speaker 1: during the day, and sometimes that's not possible. Like we 372 00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:40,000 Speaker 1: have made the choice to allow our two biggest to 373 00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:42,000 Speaker 1: continue taking piano in Miami Beach and a lot of 374 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,040 Speaker 1: times we go together so that we can then spend 375 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,680 Speaker 1: time with family or friends. The downside to that is 376 00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:49,960 Speaker 1: a nap is always completely messed up, like she'll falls 377 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:51,159 Speaker 1: deep in the car, she falls in sleep in the 378 00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:53,320 Speaker 1: way back, it's a forty minute drive whatever. So if 379 00:18:53,320 --> 00:18:55,439 Speaker 1: we do that, we are going to go to lengths 380 00:18:55,440 --> 00:18:57,600 Speaker 1: to protect the nap on the next day, because that's 381 00:18:57,640 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 1: the only time other than when we're covering for each other, 382 00:18:59,760 --> 00:19:03,040 Speaker 1: which also can happen, that we are guaranteed sometimes. So 383 00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,560 Speaker 1: not protection. It's not for her health, it's not for 384 00:19:05,600 --> 00:19:09,440 Speaker 1: her sleep. It's fully for my own sanity and enjoyment 385 00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:13,160 Speaker 1: of life, and I will own that. Okay. So that said, 386 00:19:13,240 --> 00:19:16,480 Speaker 1: my ingredients for a happy weekend are I love to 387 00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:19,040 Speaker 1: get in a workout both days. I try to work 388 00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:20,880 Speaker 1: out five to six days a week, and I often 389 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:22,919 Speaker 1: will miss a day or two during the week, so 390 00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:25,159 Speaker 1: hopefully I can get something in on the weekends. They 391 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,119 Speaker 1: don't have to be involved things. It could be a 392 00:19:27,200 --> 00:19:29,199 Speaker 1: run with a stroller one day, so that that is, 393 00:19:29,320 --> 00:19:32,160 Speaker 1: you know, Genevieve time and giving Josh some non Genevieve 394 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:34,720 Speaker 1: time and kind of kill a couple of birds with 395 00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:37,639 Speaker 1: one stone. So that's good. I often like to do 396 00:19:37,680 --> 00:19:40,240 Speaker 1: a date night. We didn't used to feel like we 397 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,840 Speaker 1: needed to go out every week that we were not 398 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:45,480 Speaker 1: on call. And then somehow, after Genevieve and both of 399 00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:47,679 Speaker 1: us becoming maybe a little bit more busy with work, 400 00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:50,919 Speaker 1: even we really do like it, or maybe I like 401 00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,000 Speaker 1: it and he tolerates it. Even if we do something 402 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:55,320 Speaker 1: very low key, like just like go to a gastropub 403 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,960 Speaker 1: and have a beer, it just doesn't seem like we 404 00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:01,199 Speaker 1: get that much other quality time during the week. So 405 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:04,280 Speaker 1: just like a little protected once weekly window is really 406 00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:05,919 Speaker 1: helpful for us. I know, I know you guys do 407 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:08,840 Speaker 1: Friday nights, but that's usually a late work night for him, 408 00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:12,120 Speaker 1: so it doesn't work. And that said, my Friday night 409 00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:15,000 Speaker 1: is usually total wine down time. I am not usually 410 00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:17,359 Speaker 1: up for doing much, so this actually works out really well. 411 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,359 Speaker 1: Also on my list, I have accepted and enjoy that 412 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:21,840 Speaker 1: we are often going to eat out. I think I 413 00:20:21,920 --> 00:20:24,120 Speaker 1: used to feel like, oh, I'm somehow feeling if I'm 414 00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:26,960 Speaker 1: not putting together these meals. And I do still occasionally 415 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:29,800 Speaker 1: for fun, like to put together a Sunday dinner, but 416 00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:33,879 Speaker 1: that's only if it makes sense for the day, and 417 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 1: a lot of times it doesn't, and so I just 418 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,800 Speaker 1: embrace it. We try fun restaurants. We try to find 419 00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:40,960 Speaker 1: restaurants that are family friendly. This coming weekend, we actually 420 00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:44,280 Speaker 1: had a date night planned and our big well actually didn't. 421 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:46,720 Speaker 1: I hadn't really reserved the babysitter completely. I sort of 422 00:20:46,720 --> 00:20:48,640 Speaker 1: assumed she could do it, and because it wasn't any 423 00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:51,080 Speaker 1: like big deal thing and she can't make it. So 424 00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:53,320 Speaker 1: I made a reservation for all of us at the 425 00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:54,679 Speaker 1: same place that we were going to go, just at 426 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:56,760 Speaker 1: five thirty pm, and we'll just see how that goes 427 00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:59,800 Speaker 1: and it'll be okay. We don't do a lot of 428 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:03,400 Speaker 1: how if there's something that really is essential that has 429 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,120 Speaker 1: to be done, I'll try to do it during her nap, 430 00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:08,399 Speaker 1: But because that's kind of that only downtime, that's not 431 00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:11,560 Speaker 1: usually what I do. Again, I know this is a 432 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,879 Speaker 1: very lucky thing, but a lot of this has to 433 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:15,680 Speaker 1: do with the fact that I can outsource what I 434 00:21:15,680 --> 00:21:19,840 Speaker 1: would consider kind of the big two household tasks, which 435 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:23,600 Speaker 1: are maybe maybe you could buy them into three laundry, groceries, 436 00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:25,680 Speaker 1: and meal prep. I know that a lot of people 437 00:21:25,720 --> 00:21:29,040 Speaker 1: spend their weekends doing this. We have made the choice 438 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:31,800 Speaker 1: not to and invest in having somebody else do these things. 439 00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:34,359 Speaker 1: That's part of why we're going to continue having full 440 00:21:34,560 --> 00:21:38,440 Speaker 1: nanny coverage even when Genevieve starts into school in August. 441 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:40,840 Speaker 1: For us, it's worth it. It's one hundred percent buying 442 00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:44,840 Speaker 1: ourselves time for ourselves, times with the kids. And again, 443 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:46,720 Speaker 1: I recognize that we're lucky to be able to make 444 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:50,080 Speaker 1: that choice, but that's what we've done. And then finally 445 00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:54,119 Speaker 1: Sunday afternoons, I still, you know, I don't have a 446 00:21:54,200 --> 00:21:57,119 Speaker 1: terrible feeling of dread because I like my job and sometimes, 447 00:21:57,160 --> 00:21:59,679 Speaker 1: you know, again being completely honest, I'm happy to have 448 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:02,719 Speaker 1: my child oh care return on Monday. But I do 449 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:06,199 Speaker 1: enjoy Sunday play dates sometimes as just a way to 450 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:08,680 Speaker 1: kind of not feeling the weekends totally over until I 451 00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:11,200 Speaker 1: have something planned and special. And it does seem like 452 00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,120 Speaker 1: there are a lot of birthday parties in Sunday afternoons 453 00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:16,639 Speaker 1: as well, so that's often an ingredient. Yeah, no, that 454 00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:22,000 Speaker 1: sounds that sounds good. And agree that the idea that 455 00:22:22,040 --> 00:22:26,080 Speaker 1: you'd be dreading Monday is again maybe for people who 456 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:30,880 Speaker 1: don't have intense family responsibilities over the weekend. I think 457 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:32,440 Speaker 1: I've felt it when I was pumped, if you know, 458 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:33,800 Speaker 1: I think it also just has to do with your 459 00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:36,159 Speaker 1: feelings about your job, Like when I was pumping and 460 00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,199 Speaker 1: very stressed and didn't feel like I could get my 461 00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:41,200 Speaker 1: work done, and I probably had some dread. But right 462 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:42,960 Speaker 1: now I'm like, oh, I have patients like, oh, I 463 00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,399 Speaker 1: have jammy stuff, like I have podcasts, like I like 464 00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:48,679 Speaker 1: what I do. So I don't really feel dread. Yeah, no, 465 00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:50,840 Speaker 1: same here, I don't. I don't think I've ever felt 466 00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:54,120 Speaker 1: Sunday night dread. But people ask me about it a lot, 467 00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:55,720 Speaker 1: like it turns out to be a topic of convert 468 00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:58,199 Speaker 1: you know, articles, and I get asked to weigh in 469 00:22:58,240 --> 00:22:59,960 Speaker 1: on this a lot first, so I guess you know 470 00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 1: it must be common, So there you go. Yeah, I 471 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:06,880 Speaker 1: think weekends definitely are matter a lot. I mean, if 472 00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,960 Speaker 1: you have a full time job, this is when the 473 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:12,400 Speaker 1: bulk of your potential leisure time and your family time 474 00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:15,520 Speaker 1: can happen, and so it's really important not to treat 475 00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:18,840 Speaker 1: it as an afterthought. Even that whole idea of Wednesday 476 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,400 Speaker 1: being the hump day of the week, it's said, well, 477 00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:23,080 Speaker 1: that implies it's five real days and two tacked on, 478 00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:25,560 Speaker 1: and that's just not the way life really is. And 479 00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:27,440 Speaker 1: so I like to think of Thursday as the midpoint 480 00:23:27,440 --> 00:23:32,119 Speaker 1: of the week because that's more reality. Yeah, you have Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, 481 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,080 Speaker 1: Thursdays and the middle and you have Friday, Saturday, Sunday, 482 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:37,520 Speaker 1: and those are two equal sides and they take just 483 00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:40,800 Speaker 1: as much time, and so it's important to treat them 484 00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:43,280 Speaker 1: as such. And I know that a lot of people 485 00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:46,359 Speaker 1: sort of have this built in resistance to the idea 486 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:48,879 Speaker 1: of planning a weekend and the idea of planning leisure 487 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:52,639 Speaker 1: time in general. And that can work if you're you know, 488 00:23:53,359 --> 00:23:59,040 Speaker 1: twenty five and don't have any responsibilities whatsoever. But if 489 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:02,919 Speaker 1: you do have children, you know what winds up happening 490 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,760 Speaker 1: is if if you're not planning, you are going to 491 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,719 Speaker 1: wind up hovering over the toddler the whole time, or 492 00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:08,879 Speaker 1: just you know, doing chores and sort of getting through 493 00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,200 Speaker 1: the weekend and feel like you have no relaxation time. 494 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:13,280 Speaker 1: And then people throughout the idea of like, oh, well, 495 00:24:13,280 --> 00:24:15,520 Speaker 1: when you're a parent, you can never have fun. It's like, well, no, 496 00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,880 Speaker 1: it's not true. It's just you have to plan ahead. 497 00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,320 Speaker 1: And so if you can get your head around that idea, 498 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,919 Speaker 1: then you can I enjoy the best of both worlds? 499 00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:26,280 Speaker 1: So you know important, I think, I think there's also 500 00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:27,520 Speaker 1: something to be said. You know, you just made me 501 00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:29,320 Speaker 1: flashback to when I was twenty five, and I guess 502 00:24:29,359 --> 00:24:31,880 Speaker 1: I was in med school and I planned my weekends 503 00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:34,879 Speaker 1: then too. Okay, well, there's just the personality. That's totally 504 00:24:34,880 --> 00:24:36,840 Speaker 1: personality thing. But it's also to be a benefit, I guess, 505 00:24:36,880 --> 00:24:38,520 Speaker 1: because if you know you have something stressful to do, 506 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,560 Speaker 1: but then you know it's like earmarked for like two 507 00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:43,240 Speaker 1: to five on Sunday, then you could at least again, 508 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:45,040 Speaker 1: this is my personality, but you may just want to 509 00:24:45,040 --> 00:24:48,320 Speaker 1: experiment with this. You may feel freer on Saturday knowing 510 00:24:48,359 --> 00:24:51,320 Speaker 1: that you kind of put that in its place and 511 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:53,760 Speaker 1: that it's not sort of hanging over your head. I'm 512 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:56,159 Speaker 1: not necessarily the kind of person who like gets everything 513 00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:59,760 Speaker 1: done super early, but I feel so much more comfortable 514 00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:01,359 Speaker 1: kind of knowing when I'm going to do that. And 515 00:25:01,480 --> 00:25:03,560 Speaker 1: you know what that's Yeah, that's gone back many many years, 516 00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:06,320 Speaker 1: even before children. And also putting some of these strategies 517 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:09,600 Speaker 1: into practice before you are into parenthood isn't a crazy 518 00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 1: idea either. Yeah, well I like that idea. I mean, 519 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:14,480 Speaker 1: especially you know, if you do chores and errands on 520 00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:16,399 Speaker 1: a weekend, for instance, I think it's very helpful to 521 00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,359 Speaker 1: designate a window. Right. You might say, like, you know, 522 00:25:20,400 --> 00:25:22,879 Speaker 1: nine to eleven on Saturday morning is when I do 523 00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:24,800 Speaker 1: chores and errands or nine to noon if you need 524 00:25:24,800 --> 00:25:26,760 Speaker 1: that amount of time or whatever. But then you know, 525 00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:28,320 Speaker 1: you know there's a time for it, and that frees 526 00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:29,720 Speaker 1: you up the rest of the time, Like you don't 527 00:25:29,760 --> 00:25:32,119 Speaker 1: have to say, oh, the rest of that I should 528 00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:33,800 Speaker 1: be doing this, or you know, say it's maybe Sunday 529 00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:35,320 Speaker 1: afternoon or something that you're going to do it. But 530 00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:36,920 Speaker 1: then you know say, oh, should I be doing my 531 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:39,480 Speaker 1: chores now? Well, no, there's time for that, and now 532 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,199 Speaker 1: is not that time, so I can I can relax 533 00:25:42,240 --> 00:25:44,600 Speaker 1: and enjoy myself instead of thinking this is always an 534 00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:46,399 Speaker 1: option or if you have a work project you need 535 00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:48,640 Speaker 1: to do or studying or something like that. Yeah, designating 536 00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:50,760 Speaker 1: a window, I do admit it as a person because 537 00:25:50,760 --> 00:25:52,840 Speaker 1: I also just had a flashback to somebody who once 538 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:55,240 Speaker 1: read my blog and said, like all of my planners 539 00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:58,359 Speaker 1: just made her like want to throw up, and in 540 00:25:58,400 --> 00:26:02,600 Speaker 1: the kindest way, and she explained her way of thinking 541 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:05,480 Speaker 1: through things, and it was like so opposite, and it 542 00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,720 Speaker 1: was very fluid and she was comfortable with it. So 543 00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 1: if that's your thing, then great, But that's your thing, 544 00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:14,600 Speaker 1: that's feeling, that's more rare. I think. I think that. 545 00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:17,520 Speaker 1: I think that people who can have no stress and 546 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:22,040 Speaker 1: no structure are not common. Yeah, I mean, and if 547 00:26:22,040 --> 00:26:24,199 Speaker 1: that's you, that's great. So you should let us know, 548 00:26:24,280 --> 00:26:26,679 Speaker 1: tell us, tell us your secrets. We'd love to hear 549 00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:29,560 Speaker 1: about it. Yeah. Well, it was your ideal ingredient weekend, 550 00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:32,280 Speaker 1: my ideal ingredient weekend. So I was thinking about this. 551 00:26:32,400 --> 00:26:35,159 Speaker 1: I like to do a date night, I like to 552 00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:38,560 Speaker 1: do a long run, and have some sort of adventure. 553 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:43,040 Speaker 1: So between the three of those, you know, some weekends 554 00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:44,879 Speaker 1: we do better than others. I would say we haven't 555 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:49,000 Speaker 1: had necessarily a ton of adventures per se, but I 556 00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:51,400 Speaker 1: do try to plan something so you know, when we're 557 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:54,280 Speaker 1: recording this a couple the past. The last two weekends 558 00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:57,480 Speaker 1: of March had all these elements. So my husband and 559 00:26:57,560 --> 00:27:00,680 Speaker 1: I went out to some nice restaurants both Friday nights. 560 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:03,120 Speaker 1: So that was cool because that's when we have childcare 561 00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:05,960 Speaker 1: built in, so it's it's not a big deal to 562 00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:09,600 Speaker 1: be able to sort of even spontaneously make plans, although 563 00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:12,439 Speaker 1: both of these places he kind of made spans. Yeah, okay, 564 00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,679 Speaker 1: well you know what I mean, Like, I know, we 565 00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:16,800 Speaker 1: didn't have to we didn't have to book a restaurant 566 00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:19,399 Speaker 1: in advance, but these were two places that we wanted 567 00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:22,320 Speaker 1: to go, so we needed to. And then the long run, 568 00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:25,040 Speaker 1: you know, it tends to be that I do with 569 00:27:25,320 --> 00:27:27,800 Speaker 1: a friend or something, but because that nudges me to 570 00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:29,480 Speaker 1: run a little further. But I certainly could do my 571 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:31,480 Speaker 1: own like last week, and I too, because then you're 572 00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:35,160 Speaker 1: doing workout in social time. Yeah, social time too. I uh. 573 00:27:35,560 --> 00:27:38,960 Speaker 1: The week the adventures, you know, we went to the 574 00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,920 Speaker 1: cherry blossoms in Washington, d C. One day a couple 575 00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:44,320 Speaker 1: of weekends ago. The weekend before that, we went to 576 00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:46,880 Speaker 1: the last sort of day of skiing that was possible 577 00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,840 Speaker 1: at Blue Ridge, Blue Mountain. I sat at the bottom 578 00:27:49,840 --> 00:27:51,280 Speaker 1: and watched the kids ski, and then we all went 579 00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:53,720 Speaker 1: out to dinner together. So that was kind of a 580 00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:57,919 Speaker 1: family adventure. You know. What we're always what limits the 581 00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:01,560 Speaker 1: sort of adventures is that we have activities. I mean 582 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 1: we have now we're into spring sports. We've got baseball, 583 00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 1: we've got soccer, you know, it's still have karate and swim, 584 00:28:08,400 --> 00:28:11,280 Speaker 1: so it's it's a little harder to do these sort 585 00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:15,199 Speaker 1: of longer adventures around the structure of that. I also 586 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:18,600 Speaker 1: sing in my church choir, and so I am generally 587 00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:22,639 Speaker 1: committed to be there on the morning Sunday morning, which 588 00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:24,800 Speaker 1: you know I enjoy. So it's I guess I would 589 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,600 Speaker 1: put that in a in a weekend too. And I 590 00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,400 Speaker 1: particularly like when we're singing really nice music, or when 591 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:32,120 Speaker 1: my chamber choir is singing, because that's a really good 592 00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:36,080 Speaker 1: group with a lot of tight harmony, very enjoyable to 593 00:28:36,080 --> 00:28:39,600 Speaker 1: to sing with. So yeah, that those are the ingredients, 594 00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:42,360 Speaker 1: you know. I'm actually I know, I know you guys 595 00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:45,400 Speaker 1: aren't aren't particularly religious other than than sort of family 596 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:48,080 Speaker 1: observed family stuff. You haven't chosen to make it like 597 00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:51,120 Speaker 1: a you know, ritual, So you're not going to synagogue 598 00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:55,720 Speaker 1: every Saturday. No. No, the I mean, you know, the 599 00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:59,800 Speaker 1: interest the upside of it is its structured activity for kids, 600 00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:04,560 Speaker 1: that good for their nices, that that they're teaching good 601 00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:06,719 Speaker 1: lessons and that kind of a thing. I guess our 602 00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:10,040 Speaker 1: equivalent of them is we go to piano. Yeah, exactly. 603 00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,800 Speaker 1: So I mean, just you know, I know some people 604 00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:16,480 Speaker 1: are like, well, I'm religious, but I don't go to church, 605 00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:18,240 Speaker 1: and well, you kind of the benefits all in the 606 00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:21,520 Speaker 1: going to the house of worship. I mean, whatever you 607 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,200 Speaker 1: believe is between you know, you and God. But the actual, 608 00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:28,000 Speaker 1: like cool part of building a community is in the yeah, 609 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:33,080 Speaker 1: somewhere enjoining the organization. And so we've enjoyed that. I 610 00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:35,480 Speaker 1: like to see my middle schooler go to things that 611 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:37,440 Speaker 1: he did a lock in a couple of weeks ago, 612 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:41,040 Speaker 1: and you know, they play with their friends there, and 613 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:45,320 Speaker 1: even Alex has Sunday school and so he gets very 614 00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:47,640 Speaker 1: excited about it. Think it's to play with blocks and 615 00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:51,120 Speaker 1: do his religious training. So okay, yeah, no, it's a 616 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:53,040 Speaker 1: good way to keep the kids occupied on Sunday. It 617 00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,320 Speaker 1: sounds very nice. Plus it's a family activity with like 618 00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:57,000 Speaker 1: levels for it. I mean, there aren't that many things 619 00:29:57,040 --> 00:29:58,960 Speaker 1: that are like that, where now go somewhere as a 620 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:01,240 Speaker 1: family and each person as kind of their own thing 621 00:30:01,240 --> 00:30:03,920 Speaker 1: that they can enjoy at their level. Yeah, so you know, 622 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,080 Speaker 1: I think there's some upsides of that of finding a 623 00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:10,320 Speaker 1: place that's oriented toward children. If you are remotely interested 624 00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:14,000 Speaker 1: in that sort of part of your life. You know, 625 00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,960 Speaker 1: let's see what else. So I come it. I think 626 00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,320 Speaker 1: about my weekend ahead of time. I plan my weeks 627 00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:22,920 Speaker 1: on Friday afternoons, but that usually includes looking at the 628 00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,520 Speaker 1: next weekend, so it gives me a last chance to 629 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:28,480 Speaker 1: look at the upcoming weekend. So if we haven't thought 630 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:30,920 Speaker 1: that through, we can think about that. But then I'm 631 00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:34,440 Speaker 1: also taking a preliminary glance at the next weekend and 632 00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:37,680 Speaker 1: seeing what needs to happen for that and what we 633 00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:40,000 Speaker 1: could fit in and what we might wish to do. 634 00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:44,360 Speaker 1: And sometimes if I know there's a weekend coming up 635 00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:46,920 Speaker 1: where there's going to be a ton of stuff, I 636 00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:49,200 Speaker 1: start thinking about that even further ahead of time. We 637 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:53,120 Speaker 1: have a particular May weekend that involves a choir concert, 638 00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:58,000 Speaker 1: a cub Scout camping trip, the broad Street ten miler 639 00:30:59,640 --> 00:31:03,880 Speaker 1: birthday party, like just Ton, that's a lot end. I'm 640 00:31:03,880 --> 00:31:06,120 Speaker 1: going to New York Sunday night to be there for 641 00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:08,520 Speaker 1: Monday morning. So yeah, there's just a lot of stuff. 642 00:31:08,720 --> 00:31:10,880 Speaker 1: So we had to sort that one out a month 643 00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:14,200 Speaker 1: ahead of time. So that makes sense. Yeah, I kind 644 00:31:14,200 --> 00:31:17,320 Speaker 1: of holistically, I mean I don't have like a specific 645 00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,040 Speaker 1: time and I think through weekends. I try to basically 646 00:31:20,120 --> 00:31:22,720 Speaker 1: just have our babysitter every time that we're not on call. 647 00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:26,360 Speaker 1: I didn't for this particular weekend, but usually and then 648 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,200 Speaker 1: I don't know, somehow, it seems like the calendar just 649 00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:30,720 Speaker 1: fills itself up. I think we're just in that stage 650 00:31:30,720 --> 00:31:32,640 Speaker 1: where all the kids are having birthday parties and there's 651 00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:36,320 Speaker 1: school stuff and family stuff, and someone's always having a birthday, 652 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:38,400 Speaker 1: you know, not even the kids birthday parties, but like 653 00:31:38,400 --> 00:31:40,920 Speaker 1: somebody else. It's almost like I don't have to look 654 00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,959 Speaker 1: for things. And then the few things that I do 655 00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:44,760 Speaker 1: that are on weekends, like our parentsing book club, like 656 00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:46,720 Speaker 1: the few remaining weekends get filled up. And then because 657 00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:48,360 Speaker 1: my husband I like to go to concerts and plays, 658 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:49,760 Speaker 1: if we see something that catches our eye and we 659 00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,240 Speaker 1: can go, we book that. So it's like it just happens. 660 00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:54,560 Speaker 1: They get filled and I love that. Yeah, well I 661 00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:56,640 Speaker 1: feel lucky. Feel lucky for that. So it's good to 662 00:31:56,640 --> 00:32:00,320 Speaker 1: have a robust social life. Yeah, I gotta say, weekends 663 00:32:00,360 --> 00:32:03,560 Speaker 1: have changed so much for me in the last year. 664 00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:08,200 Speaker 1: And this is this is really just I mean, we 665 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:10,760 Speaker 1: have to we do a little bit less sort of 666 00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:16,440 Speaker 1: planning and talking about who's covering what now because our 667 00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:21,080 Speaker 1: weekends have changed now that the youngest kid is four, 668 00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:24,720 Speaker 1: and you know, I'm not saying he doesn't get in trouble, 669 00:32:24,800 --> 00:32:28,240 Speaker 1: but he doesn't have to be hovered over in that 670 00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:31,720 Speaker 1: same way. You could even like sleep in a little bit. Yeah, 671 00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:35,040 Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's he but he'll go watch YouTube 672 00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:37,120 Speaker 1: for an hour in the morning. You can keep sleeping, 673 00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,680 Speaker 1: and so far hasn't shown any inclination to get into 674 00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:43,600 Speaker 1: trouble while he's watching YouTube. So I'm like, yeah, go YouTube. 675 00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:47,800 Speaker 1: You know who knows what he's watching. But he can 676 00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:50,880 Speaker 1: operate the mouse, so he's kind of you go, he's okay. 677 00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:53,320 Speaker 1: I'm sure he's fine, but yeah, I can actually like 678 00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:56,280 Speaker 1: so last week and I took the big kids over 679 00:32:56,400 --> 00:32:58,920 Speaker 1: to the Elmwood Park Zoo and Sam and Ruth did this, 680 00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:04,680 Speaker 1: like ropes course, slight strategic miscalculation because Jasper was too 681 00:33:04,720 --> 00:33:07,920 Speaker 1: big to do the little kids one, so he would 682 00:33:07,920 --> 00:33:09,240 Speaker 1: have had to do the adult one. But then I 683 00:33:09,280 --> 00:33:11,400 Speaker 1: couldn't He couldn't go by himself. He needed an adult 684 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:13,720 Speaker 1: over sixteen, but I couldn't go with him and leave 685 00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:17,240 Speaker 1: the other two somewhere. Another adult, Yeah, I needed another one. 686 00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:18,719 Speaker 1: You probably figured that he could do the kids one. 687 00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:20,360 Speaker 1: I figured he could do the kids one. Yeah he's 688 00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:23,280 Speaker 1: like taller than me, so yeah, yeah, that didn't quite work, 689 00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:25,120 Speaker 1: so you know, but unfortunately he was a very good 690 00:33:25,120 --> 00:33:29,000 Speaker 1: sport about it. But anyway, I came home and you know, 691 00:33:29,040 --> 00:33:31,080 Speaker 1: my husband and Alex had gotten home from Sac around 692 00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:33,360 Speaker 1: the same time, and Michael and I just sat on 693 00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:36,080 Speaker 1: the back porch kind of talking through the vacation stuff 694 00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:39,160 Speaker 1: and looking at the flowers, and the kids were inside, 695 00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:42,360 Speaker 1: I think, watching TV. You know, maybe better parents would 696 00:33:42,360 --> 00:33:43,880 Speaker 1: have forced them to go outside and play or do 697 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:45,680 Speaker 1: something with it, but we're just like I could just 698 00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:47,680 Speaker 1: sit on the porch and could be out there for 699 00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,840 Speaker 1: like an hour and nothing went wrong, and it was amazing. 700 00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,360 Speaker 1: It's just amazing. That's like living the dream. I'm not 701 00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:55,280 Speaker 1: even kidding it is the dream. I mean, this has 702 00:33:55,360 --> 00:33:57,720 Speaker 1: not been this way for twelve years. I have not 703 00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:00,960 Speaker 1: had the ability to do this in twelve years, and 704 00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:05,320 Speaker 1: now I suddenly have some aspect of it. And so 705 00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:09,279 Speaker 1: I can read on the weekend, I can you know, 706 00:34:09,360 --> 00:34:12,160 Speaker 1: sit outside. I can actually get out late on a 707 00:34:12,239 --> 00:34:14,480 Speaker 1: date night without knowing that like it's you know, six 708 00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:16,480 Speaker 1: thirty a m someone's going to like, well, he will 709 00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:18,359 Speaker 1: be will be up at six thirty. But I don't 710 00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,680 Speaker 1: have to let you go back to SI. That's cool. 711 00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:24,120 Speaker 1: So that's yeah, No, I mean, the little kid years 712 00:34:24,160 --> 00:34:26,879 Speaker 1: are hard, and we say that we'll stay said, let's 713 00:34:26,920 --> 00:34:30,480 Speaker 1: say that twenty eight hundred more times. Yeah, little years 714 00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:34,080 Speaker 1: are hard. And it's not that the teen years aren't hard. 715 00:34:34,160 --> 00:34:38,719 Speaker 1: And there's definitely, you know, various emotional storms and you know, 716 00:34:38,840 --> 00:34:42,600 Speaker 1: homework forgetting and whatever else that that happens as kids 717 00:34:42,640 --> 00:34:46,120 Speaker 1: get older. But and I can see how things can 718 00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:49,880 Speaker 1: start to feel higher stakes with academics steaks. Yes, like 719 00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:54,560 Speaker 1: you're you know, toddler needing a diaper change is very 720 00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:59,200 Speaker 1: straightforward problem. Whereas you know, a kid who doesn't care 721 00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:03,000 Speaker 1: about math. Let's say, this is not it's not specific 722 00:35:03,680 --> 00:35:05,920 Speaker 1: case per se, but you know that that is harder 723 00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:08,600 Speaker 1: to deal with, and especially as the stakes get higher. 724 00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:10,560 Speaker 1: If that child is you know, sixteen seventeen years old, 725 00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:14,040 Speaker 1: what do you do about it? But that said, you 726 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:17,480 Speaker 1: don't necessarily logistics over the sixteen year old to make 727 00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:19,279 Speaker 1: sure that she does not sick a fork in her eye. 728 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:24,760 Speaker 1: So that's like, so I run around with a penciling 729 00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:28,680 Speaker 1: in their mouth and scribbling on things or you know, 730 00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:32,200 Speaker 1: climb in the dryer or whatever else. Oh my gosh, 731 00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:35,440 Speaker 1: there's just a million things that they can do. And 732 00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:39,520 Speaker 1: it's true, it's infinite, and you never even think of 733 00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:42,279 Speaker 1: what it is like this. I mean, although I would 734 00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:44,560 Speaker 1: say that I'm sure teenagers get into all sorts of 735 00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:46,359 Speaker 1: stuff that I haven't even thought to worry about too. 736 00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:49,759 Speaker 1: So that's a future episode. That's a future episode of 737 00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,319 Speaker 1: all right, I think we should get to the question. Yeah, 738 00:35:53,160 --> 00:35:55,719 Speaker 1: all right, let's do it. Okay, I'm going to want 739 00:35:55,719 --> 00:35:59,000 Speaker 1: to be all ready because like your answer alive, Okay, 740 00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:02,680 Speaker 1: all right, sort of, all right, wrighten up a little bit. Yeah, 741 00:36:02,719 --> 00:36:05,000 Speaker 1: I'll summarize, all right. I just came back for work 742 00:36:05,040 --> 00:36:07,600 Speaker 1: after maternity leave. Already, in my first month back, we've 743 00:36:07,600 --> 00:36:10,200 Speaker 1: dealt with some illnesses. I was told to work from home, 744 00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:11,600 Speaker 1: which I was able, and that I could make up 745 00:36:11,600 --> 00:36:14,200 Speaker 1: my time that weekend for the first fever. For the 746 00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:16,480 Speaker 1: second fever, I was told that I needed to take 747 00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:19,760 Speaker 1: PTO or unpaid time. My manager was afraid of setting 748 00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:22,960 Speaker 1: a precedent. That happened because the other employees on my 749 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,680 Speaker 1: team are not allowed to work from home. She works 750 00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:27,839 Speaker 1: in a company where some are allowed to work from home, 751 00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:29,960 Speaker 1: but others are not. Depending on the team and manager 752 00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,160 Speaker 1: in the handbook, there's a lot of gray area. Her 753 00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:34,040 Speaker 1: job is in the marketing department, and she feels like 754 00:36:34,080 --> 00:36:36,080 Speaker 1: she could do about seventy five percent of it from home, 755 00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:38,280 Speaker 1: but because of the manager she has, she's not allowed. 756 00:36:38,520 --> 00:36:41,920 Speaker 1: She calls him old school. She states, I'm a stellar employee. 757 00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:44,560 Speaker 1: I been with this company for almost five years, but 758 00:36:44,640 --> 00:36:47,280 Speaker 1: I need some more flexibility for the months to come. 759 00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,200 Speaker 1: What do you think I should do? Look at some 760 00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:51,840 Speaker 1: other job options? Are there other time management solutions that 761 00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:54,759 Speaker 1: will happen? By the way, job options are abundant. Some 762 00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:57,600 Speaker 1: new moms that built relationships frequently work in marketing at 763 00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:59,839 Speaker 1: other companies. The more I write, the more I feel 764 00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:01,640 Speaker 1: like time to make a chance. Sorry, I read a lot, 765 00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:03,879 Speaker 1: but I kind of like she was solving her own problem. 766 00:37:04,000 --> 00:37:06,760 Speaker 1: Solving her own problem. She was writing this letter exactly 767 00:37:07,719 --> 00:37:10,880 Speaker 1: all right. So Laura and I both found this a 768 00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:13,360 Speaker 1: pretty good question and one that we felt pretty strongly 769 00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:16,080 Speaker 1: at the answer. So go ahead. Yeah, No, Unfortunately, there 770 00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:19,520 Speaker 1: are a lot of old school people still in corporate management. 771 00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:21,640 Speaker 1: And who knows? I mean in this case, it's it's 772 00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,040 Speaker 1: a man but there are probably women who are old 773 00:37:24,080 --> 00:37:26,000 Speaker 1: school too and believe that if I don't see my 774 00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:30,080 Speaker 1: employees working, they will be watching soap operas and other 775 00:37:30,160 --> 00:37:32,920 Speaker 1: such things, or that old feeling of oh, well I 776 00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:34,640 Speaker 1: did it, so you need to do it too. Well, 777 00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,520 Speaker 1: maybe they didn't have zoom back then, so you know exactly, 778 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:39,960 Speaker 1: or just you know. In this case, I think you know. 779 00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:42,960 Speaker 1: Her thought is the manager's worried about setting a precedent, 780 00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:44,799 Speaker 1: then everyone will want to work from home, and I'm 781 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:46,960 Speaker 1: sort of okay, great, like they could save on real 782 00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:49,960 Speaker 1: estate costs. That sounds awesome, like win win for everybody. 783 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:53,200 Speaker 1: But you know, perhaps he does not see it that way. 784 00:37:53,840 --> 00:37:56,279 Speaker 1: So the first thing we talked about is if his 785 00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:59,480 Speaker 1: concern is precedent, then you can work with him to 786 00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:02,080 Speaker 1: set up a program where you could work from home 787 00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:04,440 Speaker 1: when you need to. And yet not established that there 788 00:38:04,480 --> 00:38:07,000 Speaker 1: is a broad precedent of everyone can work from home 789 00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:10,760 Speaker 1: whenever he or she wants. So, for instance, one option 790 00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,360 Speaker 1: is that people who are highly rated are allowed to 791 00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:16,879 Speaker 1: work from home on occasion as needed, But anyone who 792 00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:19,560 Speaker 1: is in a more you know, like having challenges kind 793 00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:22,320 Speaker 1: of rating bucket can't, right, So this is a privilege 794 00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:24,799 Speaker 1: that has been earned by high ratings, then she gets 795 00:38:24,840 --> 00:38:26,560 Speaker 1: it great. Or maybe it's that you have to have 796 00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:28,640 Speaker 1: worked at the company for three or four years, so 797 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:32,600 Speaker 1: that you have presumably gained your manager's trust. Again, she 798 00:38:33,239 --> 00:38:35,960 Speaker 1: fits in that category. Other people who perhaps you know, 799 00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:38,560 Speaker 1: haven't been there as long, haven't earned that trust yet 800 00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:41,120 Speaker 1: wouldn't be in that bucket. Again, I don't think these 801 00:38:41,120 --> 00:38:43,360 Speaker 1: are great ideas because I don't worry about the president, 802 00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:45,000 Speaker 1: but if he does, this is what you can do. 803 00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:50,879 Speaker 1: Or Sarah suggested, sorry, I'm bumping into your having the president. Yeah, 804 00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:53,640 Speaker 1: I know that he could say, you know, you're limited 805 00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:56,040 Speaker 1: to working from home, let's say fifteen days a year 806 00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:59,040 Speaker 1: and that way. Again, it's also not a precedent of 807 00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,080 Speaker 1: everyone's going to be at home every day and nothing 808 00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:04,759 Speaker 1: will ever happen, right, So that would be an option too, 809 00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:08,440 Speaker 1: and presumably she could get through, you know, if she 810 00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:10,120 Speaker 1: has a partner as well, which she didn't mention, but 811 00:39:10,400 --> 00:39:12,080 Speaker 1: you know, between the two of them, they could probably 812 00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:14,880 Speaker 1: make it work if she got say like fifteen days 813 00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:17,040 Speaker 1: that she could work from home. Yeah, it's like two 814 00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:18,960 Speaker 1: of them. That's like you know one, well it's one 815 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:23,239 Speaker 1: most month and yeah, with a partner that should you 816 00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:26,200 Speaker 1: could get through a lot of it. That said, in 817 00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:28,279 Speaker 1: the meantime, though, you never have more leverage than when 818 00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:31,319 Speaker 1: you're considering leaving. And if you are considering leaving, you've 819 00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:34,160 Speaker 1: already put it out there that you are. You know 820 00:39:34,239 --> 00:39:36,200 Speaker 1: this matters to you quite a bit. So I think 821 00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:38,359 Speaker 1: there's nothing wrong with looking for another job. She said, 822 00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:40,200 Speaker 1: She's got a lot of contacts at other companies, like, 823 00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:44,200 Speaker 1: why not look see what's there? Have these interviews, Go 824 00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:47,759 Speaker 1: talk to people regardless. It's always good to make sure 825 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,440 Speaker 1: that you are working your network, seeing what your value is, 826 00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:54,800 Speaker 1: what options are available. Maybe she will find a wonderful 827 00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:58,720 Speaker 1: flexible position somewhere else with a manager who only cares 828 00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:00,920 Speaker 1: that the work gets done, and that would be great, 829 00:40:01,719 --> 00:40:04,439 Speaker 1: and maybe she'd decide to take it. Or she goes 830 00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:08,680 Speaker 1: to her own manager and says, hey, guess what, I 831 00:40:08,920 --> 00:40:13,680 Speaker 1: have this option elsewhere. I am looking at it seriously, 832 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:17,400 Speaker 1: and here is why. You can either offer me the 833 00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:20,359 Speaker 1: ability to work flexibly when I need it, or you 834 00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:23,120 Speaker 1: cannot right take it or leave it. And he may 835 00:40:23,120 --> 00:40:25,319 Speaker 1: get religion and take it, or he may not. That 836 00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:27,480 Speaker 1: could happen. But then you go work for somewhere that 837 00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:30,759 Speaker 1: values you, and your manager is stuck training someone new 838 00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:32,799 Speaker 1: who is not nearly as good as you, and he 839 00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:34,799 Speaker 1: is going to learn his lesson the hard way, and 840 00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:36,319 Speaker 1: you have helped out the rest of the company for 841 00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:40,040 Speaker 1: the future. So there you go. Love it. I even said, 842 00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:42,359 Speaker 1: maybe while you're doing that looking for that other job, 843 00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:45,200 Speaker 1: ar you for perhaps a very short trial basis caause 844 00:40:45,200 --> 00:40:46,680 Speaker 1: it would be harder to say no to Oh, could 845 00:40:46,680 --> 00:40:49,080 Speaker 1: we try you know, two days per month for two 846 00:40:49,160 --> 00:40:50,879 Speaker 1: months or something like that, and see how it goes 847 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:52,799 Speaker 1: and discuss after and if you're not completely blown away 848 00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:56,760 Speaker 1: and that way during your job search period, you'd be covered. Yeah, exactly, exactly, 849 00:40:57,480 --> 00:41:01,440 Speaker 1: all right. Love of the Week is feed Lee. So 850 00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:03,440 Speaker 1: this is kind of you know, it's some things you 851 00:41:03,520 --> 00:41:05,279 Speaker 1: use so much that you feel like it's obvious. So 852 00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:07,440 Speaker 1: then I you know, you don't tell others about them, 853 00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:10,240 Speaker 1: but maybe they don't know if you do read blogs. 854 00:41:10,440 --> 00:41:12,000 Speaker 1: There's two ways to do it. You could just like 855 00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:13,799 Speaker 1: have well there's a few ways you have bookmarks that 856 00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:15,360 Speaker 1: you click on, or you could just randomly go to 857 00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:17,200 Speaker 1: a site when you feel the urge, or you could 858 00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:19,640 Speaker 1: use a feed reader where they're all collected for you, 859 00:41:19,680 --> 00:41:21,239 Speaker 1: and you can go in when you want and see 860 00:41:21,239 --> 00:41:22,719 Speaker 1: all the new ones at once and read them or 861 00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:25,799 Speaker 1: mark them to save or whatever. And Feedley has been 862 00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,640 Speaker 1: around for a long time. It's owned by Google now. 863 00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:31,120 Speaker 1: I don't think it initially wasn't guessing Google bought them 864 00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:34,480 Speaker 1: out at some point, and yeah, previously was called Google Reader, 865 00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:37,120 Speaker 1: I think, But anyway, it's Feedley now. It's an app, 866 00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:40,000 Speaker 1: it's on the computer. It's super convenient, and if you 867 00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:42,600 Speaker 1: do read blogs that way, it's just a nice way 868 00:41:42,640 --> 00:41:43,920 Speaker 1: that you don't have to like go and check if 869 00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:46,279 Speaker 1: there's a new post. I will say, as someone who's 870 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:49,120 Speaker 1: currently trying to still work through, you know what's going 871 00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,160 Speaker 1: on with my own blogs traffics. Sometimes it's nice to 872 00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:54,040 Speaker 1: click through because if you read on feed Ley, the 873 00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:56,840 Speaker 1: person who's blog you're reading doesn't get any quote unquote 874 00:41:56,840 --> 00:41:58,719 Speaker 1: credit for it in terms of like paid for use 875 00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:02,320 Speaker 1: if they're that post. That's not so every once in 876 00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:04,720 Speaker 1: a while click through, but I think I think it's 877 00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:06,800 Speaker 1: I think it's still okay to use those things. I 878 00:42:06,800 --> 00:42:09,279 Speaker 1: think it's great. I'm not technologically advanced. I just go 879 00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:10,799 Speaker 1: look at the shoe box and see if there's a 880 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:14,200 Speaker 1: post so maybe we are driving out the traffic you can. 881 00:42:14,880 --> 00:42:17,160 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, let's see if Sarah has a post today. Yeah, 882 00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:20,960 Speaker 1: just check every hour. That's good for Maya. Actually, I 883 00:42:21,000 --> 00:42:23,239 Speaker 1: think so now they're looking more users. It used to 884 00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:26,000 Speaker 1: be that they would look at page views. So if 885 00:42:26,040 --> 00:42:27,680 Speaker 1: you look at it ten times, I think I get 886 00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:29,040 Speaker 1: the same credit as if you looked at it once. 887 00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:31,400 Speaker 1: Whereas about day they cared how many page views. I 888 00:42:31,440 --> 00:42:34,600 Speaker 1: don't even know who they even really powerful day of 889 00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:37,000 Speaker 1: blog steps, So what is your love of the week? 890 00:42:37,040 --> 00:42:40,280 Speaker 1: Also technological No, Well, I know you're taking an Instagram break, 891 00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:43,920 Speaker 1: but I am not. I can the screen view stats 892 00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:46,359 Speaker 1: will back up that I have not taken an Instagram bank. 893 00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,280 Speaker 1: I'm kind of enjoying it. But we had this funny, 894 00:42:48,360 --> 00:42:53,560 Speaker 1: funny thing happened a little bringing people together. So I 895 00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:57,239 Speaker 1: am reading through Instagram and I see a photo of 896 00:42:57,480 --> 00:43:00,879 Speaker 1: a friend of mine posing with a familiar looking woman. 897 00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:03,040 Speaker 1: I look and it's Carmen Dy from What Not to Wear. 898 00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:07,040 Speaker 1: And people who are long term listeners to best of 899 00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:09,640 Speaker 1: both worlds know that we have talked about who doesn't 900 00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:14,279 Speaker 1: love Karmendy? Who doesn't love Krmedy? Right? Yeah, I'll try 901 00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:17,520 Speaker 1: and try and find track her down. But yeah, so anyway, 902 00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:20,520 Speaker 1: this this picture is of my friend and Carmody, and 903 00:43:20,560 --> 00:43:23,319 Speaker 1: I you know, post some quote and some comment on 904 00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:27,440 Speaker 1: Instagram of like, oh total fangirl moment you met Carmen 905 00:43:27,520 --> 00:43:30,239 Speaker 1: Dy How awesome. So then my friend shoots me an 906 00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:32,920 Speaker 1: email like an hour later and says, hey, do you 907 00:43:32,920 --> 00:43:37,920 Speaker 1: want to go to Carmody's birthday party? And so apparently 908 00:43:38,000 --> 00:43:41,240 Speaker 1: she had. She had met Carmandy at this event where 909 00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:44,279 Speaker 1: everyone who'd been interviewed as part of a series were 910 00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:46,040 Speaker 1: all there, and so my friend and Carmody had both 911 00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:48,279 Speaker 1: been in this video series. They they got to tap 912 00:43:48,520 --> 00:43:52,120 Speaker 1: talking and whatever. And so anyway, I went with my 913 00:43:52,160 --> 00:43:56,400 Speaker 1: friend to like as a guest, I guess to Carmeny's 914 00:43:56,400 --> 00:43:58,960 Speaker 1: birthday party, and it actually worked out great. I had 915 00:43:58,960 --> 00:44:00,560 Speaker 1: to be in New York the next morning for something, 916 00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:02,000 Speaker 1: so like we'll come in the night before and go 917 00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:04,239 Speaker 1: to the birthday party. And so while I'm there like 918 00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:06,520 Speaker 1: beating Carmody at the bar and who was standing next 919 00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:10,000 Speaker 1: to her at Stacy London also from whatnot? But they're 920 00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:14,480 Speaker 1: still friends and to those birthday parties. That is amazing. 921 00:44:15,280 --> 00:44:17,359 Speaker 1: I'm like having a fangirl moment because you saw them. 922 00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:19,840 Speaker 1: I mean, that's like two degrees of separation. Although I 923 00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:22,600 Speaker 1: did see Clinton Kelly once at a Miami Beach restaurant. 924 00:44:22,719 --> 00:44:26,160 Speaker 1: Yeah cool, Well there you go. So I was there. 925 00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:28,440 Speaker 1: I did not know Clinton Kelly was not sure. I 926 00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:31,000 Speaker 1: don't know. I didn't see him at the party. Just 927 00:44:31,040 --> 00:44:35,239 Speaker 1: saw saw Stacy and Carmedy. But we can get them. 928 00:44:36,200 --> 00:44:40,759 Speaker 1: So sometimes leaving a comment on Instagram like brings you 929 00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:44,040 Speaker 1: in all sorts of adventures, all sorts of joy, all 930 00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:46,799 Speaker 1: sorts of joy exactly. All right, Well, this has been 931 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,920 Speaker 1: best of both worlds. We've mostly been talking weekends with 932 00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:55,480 Speaker 1: the sub topic of weekends with toddlers, and then asking 933 00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:59,200 Speaker 1: answering the question from a listener who wants to work 934 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,799 Speaker 1: from home occasionally when she needs to stay with a 935 00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:03,920 Speaker 1: sick kid, and whose manager is old school on it 936 00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:06,719 Speaker 1: what she can do. So we'll be back next week 937 00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:12,640 Speaker 1: with more on making work and life fit together. Thanks 938 00:45:12,640 --> 00:45:15,680 Speaker 1: for listening. You can find me Sarah at the shoebox 939 00:45:15,719 --> 00:45:20,080 Speaker 1: dot com or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and 940 00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:24,040 Speaker 1: you can find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. 941 00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:27,560 Speaker 1: This has been the best of both Worlds Podcasts. Please 942 00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:30,239 Speaker 1: join us next time for more on making work and 943 00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:31,440 Speaker 1: life work together.