1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,480 Speaker 1: Welcome to Bombing with Eric Andre, the podcast where I 2 00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:05,360 Speaker 1: talk with friends, comedians, musicians, and other creative people about 3 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:09,000 Speaker 1: their worst moments on stage, eating shit and feeling like shit. 4 00:00:09,320 --> 00:00:11,440 Speaker 1: I'm Eric and Andre, and this week we are graced 5 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:13,360 Speaker 1: by the presence of one of the funniest people on 6 00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:17,280 Speaker 1: the planet, Step Tolev We go way too deep into 7 00:00:17,320 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: step sex, life on the road, and the time she 8 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,320 Speaker 1: got chased away from a comedy club by a man 9 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,720 Speaker 1: with not one but two guns on his person. As always, 10 00:00:24,720 --> 00:00:27,480 Speaker 1: please subscribe to the podcast to get new episodes every week. 11 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:30,160 Speaker 1: Rted five Stars and an Apple podcast. Subscribed to Big 12 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:33,479 Speaker 1: Bunny Players Diamond to get exclusive clips plus add free 13 00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:34,280 Speaker 1: episodes weekly. 14 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:35,360 Speaker 2: Let's get into it. 15 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:44,480 Speaker 3: Bombing with Eric and Andre. 16 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:48,080 Speaker 1: Okay, what is the hardest you've ever bombed? What's the 17 00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:50,800 Speaker 1: worst bomb you've seen? What's the worst bomb? 18 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:52,120 Speaker 2: What's the other question to ask? 19 00:00:52,200 --> 00:00:54,120 Speaker 1: What's the most waste that you've been on stage? You 20 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:56,200 Speaker 1: can answer these in any order. 21 00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:57,680 Speaker 4: I bomb all the time. 22 00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:59,360 Speaker 2: What's like one of the works, Give me the. 23 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 1: Rock bottom, rock one of the rock Bottom? 24 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:05,279 Speaker 4: What happened in Tampa, Oh Tampa was ship oh rock Bottom? 25 00:01:05,319 --> 00:01:07,560 Speaker 4: I would say I just got past to the comedy store. Okay, 26 00:01:07,720 --> 00:01:09,800 Speaker 4: this is last year, last last New Year's Eve? 27 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:10,760 Speaker 2: It was a recent bomb. 28 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:12,800 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, and the last the year for yes, it's 29 00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:16,240 Speaker 4: been over year. Just got past first main room spot. 30 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:18,119 Speaker 4: I ate my own ass. 31 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 3: What do you mean? 32 00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:20,840 Speaker 4: I like, didn't get a single laugh in fifteen minutes, 33 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:22,600 Speaker 4: and I was like, oh, I think I'm good enough 34 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:23,319 Speaker 4: for the comedy store. 35 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:25,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm ship But what night was? 36 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 3: Was it? Like? 37 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:28,640 Speaker 4: It was New Year's Ef. People were writing a party, 38 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:30,839 Speaker 4: they were writing a drunk and I'm up there eating ships. 39 00:01:31,040 --> 00:01:33,479 Speaker 2: Was the person before you doing good? Yeah? 40 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:33,840 Speaker 3: Oh yeah? 41 00:01:33,840 --> 00:01:37,199 Speaker 4: Everyone else? Well, everyone else? Well, I just the fucking 42 00:01:37,560 --> 00:01:39,840 Speaker 4: I bought my taping and I just relaughed. I was 43 00:01:39,880 --> 00:01:42,760 Speaker 4: bombed to one of those stupid fucking TV tapings. 44 00:01:42,880 --> 00:01:44,440 Speaker 1: I think you're hard on yourself. Can I put my 45 00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:44,920 Speaker 1: feet up? 46 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:47,319 Speaker 4: Please? With my my I was waiting for at least 47 00:01:47,360 --> 00:01:51,640 Speaker 4: there's socks on a low ankle, socks too, whatever I do. 48 00:01:51,800 --> 00:01:52,120 Speaker 1: I don't know. 49 00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:54,400 Speaker 4: Whatever if I get a guy and he has angle socks, 50 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:55,000 Speaker 4: it makes me sick. 51 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:55,680 Speaker 1: I don't know what it is. 52 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:56,520 Speaker 4: It's just such a turn off. 53 00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:58,800 Speaker 1: But I wanted to be No, Look, I don't want 54 00:01:58,840 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 1: I don't want you to see him. Shoes were in 55 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:06,040 Speaker 1: the shoes. Well I got lazy, yeah before I. 56 00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:06,480 Speaker 2: Had shoes on. 57 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:07,600 Speaker 4: Okay, do you have an animal? 58 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:09,679 Speaker 1: Do a cat? I have no cats. It just there's 59 00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:13,959 Speaker 1: random hair on my sock. Your songs. 60 00:02:16,000 --> 00:02:17,800 Speaker 4: Right now, your songs are reading shows. 61 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:20,680 Speaker 1: Okay, wait, give me like some horrid bombs. I want 62 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:23,240 Speaker 1: to hear horrid bombs. Okay, I uh. 63 00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:27,880 Speaker 4: I did this competition in Toronto years ago, Yuck Yuck's Great. 64 00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:30,760 Speaker 1: Canadian Comedy Club. We used to have a song we 65 00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 1: go yeah Yet Comedy cla you know, and I go 66 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:34,880 Speaker 1: to Yah yeah comedy. 67 00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:38,840 Speaker 4: It was a competition. I drove two other contestants in 68 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:41,920 Speaker 4: my car, pour my parents car. Three hundred fift people 69 00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:45,120 Speaker 4: sold out. I don't get one laugh. 70 00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:47,000 Speaker 2: Well, your parents were there, No. 71 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,640 Speaker 1: I bored their car. This in Toronto. 72 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:49,600 Speaker 4: I had bore their fucking car. 73 00:02:50,000 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 1: I go up, eat ship so bad. 74 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,359 Speaker 4: The comic whose hosting goes after me, He goes, holy shit, 75 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:58,799 Speaker 4: that was fucking bad. And I was like, like, when 76 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,280 Speaker 4: a comic says something, that's when you know it's I 77 00:03:01,320 --> 00:03:03,840 Speaker 4: went and cried in the parking lot because I had 78 00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:06,200 Speaker 4: to drive through the two homes, the first and second 79 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 4: they got first and second, I had to drive home 80 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,120 Speaker 4: the people who got first and second in the competition, well, 81 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:13,880 Speaker 4: I ate ship because this was the car I drove 82 00:03:13,919 --> 00:03:17,080 Speaker 4: them bombed and had to drive them home. 83 00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:21,639 Speaker 1: You know what fuck that is? That's fucked you carpooled. 84 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:27,440 Speaker 4: And then the winter first and second, and they were like, 85 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:28,720 Speaker 4: the knew I was upset. They get in the car 86 00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:30,880 Speaker 4: the bags or my eyes are puffed out the hell 87 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:32,840 Speaker 4: and they're in the backs either, like, and they couldn't 88 00:03:32,840 --> 00:03:35,240 Speaker 4: even get excited about it because they knew how sad 89 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 4: I was. It was so pathetic. 90 00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:39,560 Speaker 1: It was so bad. Well not I just was like. 91 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:40,760 Speaker 4: Newer two, So it wasn't good. 92 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:41,480 Speaker 3: Bob. 93 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:43,360 Speaker 4: The taping recently, do you know those don't Tell tapings 94 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 4: that are great? I love don't Tell, but I don't 95 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,320 Speaker 4: Tell comedy. They are very good because the crowd doesn't 96 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 4: know whatever. So it's the taping downtown l A. And 97 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:54,480 Speaker 4: this is literally a month ago, and I'm like, cocky, see's. 98 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:54,680 Speaker 1: Been the lineup? 99 00:03:54,680 --> 00:03:57,520 Speaker 4: I'm don't write the comments like I'm gonna kill this 100 00:03:58,080 --> 00:03:59,160 Speaker 4: five or six cameras. 101 00:03:59,360 --> 00:03:59,960 Speaker 1: I'm ready to go. 102 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 2: What is it for? 103 00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 4: They put it online. They have a huge online dotells. 104 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:07,120 Speaker 4: They're huge. They like produce specials they do and they 105 00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 4: have like a huge Instagram. All the people's clips go viral. 106 00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:14,000 Speaker 4: It's really great for your I'm. 107 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,640 Speaker 2: I'm like on YouTube, dot com, dot org. 108 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 4: You have no idea what you're looking for. So I 109 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 4: go to this taping smug smug. I go on fourth fifth, 110 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,920 Speaker 4: I'm like the money spot. I walk on and I'm like, hey, 111 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:28,440 Speaker 4: and I came up. 112 00:04:28,440 --> 00:04:28,920 Speaker 1: Pretty hot. 113 00:04:29,000 --> 00:04:33,000 Speaker 4: Girl in the front goes and I go what. I go, 114 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,960 Speaker 4: I'm sorry, did I scare you? She's like yeah, and 115 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,200 Speaker 4: then her and her six friends like start pointing laughing 116 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:41,520 Speaker 4: at me, and I was like, okay. So I'm like, 117 00:04:41,560 --> 00:04:44,559 Speaker 4: all right, strange. So I'm like, immediately be the sweat. 118 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:48,800 Speaker 4: I'm like, oh this started off. So I'm like, let 119 00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:50,280 Speaker 4: mebe do a bit of crowd work to get loosen 120 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 4: them up. I go look at the front rod forehead 121 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:54,920 Speaker 4: fucking hates me. Guys got the biggest forehead I've seen 122 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:56,480 Speaker 4: my entire life. Like it starts here, goes to the 123 00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:59,479 Speaker 4: back of his head. Foreheads like this. So of the 124 00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:02,359 Speaker 4: back is like, I'm like, oh my off the jump, 125 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:04,599 Speaker 4: off the jump, Off the jump. I found it after 126 00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 4: the forehead guy. It's his art studio we're filming in. 127 00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:09,840 Speaker 4: So I'm shitting on the fucking guys. 128 00:05:10,880 --> 00:05:12,160 Speaker 2: The master of ceremonies. 129 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:14,200 Speaker 4: Yes, So I had to get off stage and tell 130 00:05:14,240 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 4: them to delete the footage. I couldn't even get a 131 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:17,359 Speaker 4: thirty second clip out of it. 132 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:18,479 Speaker 1: And this just happened. 133 00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:21,320 Speaker 4: That's another horrible, another bad one. 134 00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:23,600 Speaker 2: Why is the guy who's running the thing sit in 135 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 2: front row? 136 00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:26,440 Speaker 4: And if you have a forehead that big covered up? 137 00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:28,880 Speaker 4: It was, it's like, or get awake, I don't know, 138 00:05:28,920 --> 00:05:29,760 Speaker 4: it's put on. 139 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,240 Speaker 1: The andy warho or just get don't don't sit front 140 00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:34,120 Speaker 1: row center, arms folded. 141 00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:36,440 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, and it was. He was much older everybody else. 142 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:37,719 Speaker 4: So I'm like, of course I got to talk to 143 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 4: the guy who shouldn't be here is well, it's a 144 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:42,000 Speaker 4: very young crowd, is what old man? 145 00:05:42,120 --> 00:05:42,200 Speaker 3: Like? 146 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:43,120 Speaker 4: What's he doing here? Something was weird? 147 00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:44,000 Speaker 1: How did the girl say? 148 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, just terrified my presence. I walked on and she 149 00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:49,800 Speaker 4: was like disgusted by me. And then there's a couple 150 00:05:49,839 --> 00:05:51,479 Speaker 4: beside me and I was making fun of short guys 151 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 4: and he was like, I'm five six, what of it. 152 00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:56,480 Speaker 4: I'm like, I've already buried myself a sweat dumping down. 153 00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,599 Speaker 1: Men you can't and you just like, I can't recover. 154 00:05:58,640 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 1: I can't recover. 155 00:05:59,320 --> 00:05:59,960 Speaker 3: I can't recover. 156 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:02,719 Speaker 2: Then you're like, then you're disassociating. 157 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:03,840 Speaker 4: And then oh yeah, and then I'm like I'm trying. 158 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:05,279 Speaker 4: At this point I knew I wasn't even to use 159 00:06:05,279 --> 00:06:06,560 Speaker 4: a tape, so I was like trying. I should have 160 00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,000 Speaker 4: just gone completely off the rails, but I was like 161 00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:10,839 Speaker 4: so embarrassed, got right off, eyes welded up with tears. 162 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,320 Speaker 4: Also like I'm embarrassed in front of people I know 163 00:06:14,320 --> 00:06:17,240 Speaker 4: who've seen me do well, that's tough. I did the lab, 164 00:06:17,720 --> 00:06:19,559 Speaker 4: the improv lab, which is one of the worst rooms 165 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 4: in the fucking country. 166 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:23,880 Speaker 1: Everyone says it's so bad the laboratory. 167 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:27,800 Speaker 4: It's the lab experiments and just put them up that 168 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:28,679 Speaker 4: would be more entertaining. 169 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,400 Speaker 2: There's a curse over that room. 170 00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:34,360 Speaker 1: Has anyone ever crushed ever in that room? 171 00:06:34,440 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 4: I think you get like a glimpse every once in 172 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,040 Speaker 4: a while, you have like one good set and you. 173 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:43,040 Speaker 1: Think, apparently fucked about that room. I think what it is. 174 00:06:43,760 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 1: I think that people are like, I'm going to a 175 00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:49,000 Speaker 1: comedy club. Let me just go get a drink at 176 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:52,160 Speaker 1: a bar first, Oh wait, there's a comedy show at 177 00:06:52,160 --> 00:06:55,520 Speaker 1: the bar before the show too, huh. And they're like 178 00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:59,840 Speaker 1: they're not mentally prepared. There's something that doesn't work in 179 00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:01,440 Speaker 1: that room and has never. 180 00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:04,120 Speaker 4: No because the bar is there, it's all open. No, 181 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:07,159 Speaker 4: it's no one has so this night specifically, I go 182 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 4: up when I say I eat shit so hard that 183 00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 4: there's a guy, Nick Harris is a man right here 184 00:07:10,800 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 4: who like brings it up. He's like, that was the 185 00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:14,280 Speaker 4: funniest bot of seeing it. Like when you see something 186 00:07:14,320 --> 00:07:15,600 Speaker 4: bomb that bad, you remember it like it's a nice 187 00:07:15,640 --> 00:07:18,760 Speaker 4: memory for him. I bomb so bad ten minutes. No, well, 188 00:07:18,840 --> 00:07:20,520 Speaker 4: not even like and usually it's like you can get 189 00:07:20,520 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 4: a laugh, zero laughs. My buddy jack Fink show I 190 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,080 Speaker 4: Love Jackie always throws me up. I was like, I 191 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 4: bomb so bad at the end of my set. I 192 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 4: but then I can stay and I went, I'm on 193 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:32,200 Speaker 4: fucking Netflix, Like you know what's bad when you bring 194 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,120 Speaker 4: your credits out? And I went, well, and I was like, 195 00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,200 Speaker 4: I go off and he doesn't come up behind me 196 00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:40,600 Speaker 4: and he grabs my heels. That right there is a 197 00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:43,440 Speaker 4: woman having a mental breakdown. And then that didn't even 198 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:45,040 Speaker 4: get a laugh. And I was like, Okay, this room 199 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:46,720 Speaker 4: was fucked, like this guy's shitting on me. And you 200 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:51,080 Speaker 4: guys are still likery about that. But I take I 201 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:53,000 Speaker 4: take bomb still to heart, like if. 202 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,240 Speaker 1: I don't mark, why have to? 203 00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 4: You can't get better if you're fucking walking around these 204 00:07:57,040 --> 00:07:59,280 Speaker 4: comics eating shit all the time, thinking they're fucking somebody. 205 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 1: When you Yeah, here's the mother's success. What is like 206 00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 1: a bomb that you remember in your early days? I 207 00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:08,760 Speaker 1: went like, details, has anybody ere like thrown something at you? 208 00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:11,320 Speaker 1: Or have you ever gotten like a standing boovation? 209 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:12,240 Speaker 4: No? 210 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:14,080 Speaker 1: I had walk out. 211 00:08:14,120 --> 00:08:17,120 Speaker 4: Oh I had to walk out in North Carolina recently 212 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:21,200 Speaker 4: at the improv. It's a very large improv, five theater. Yeah, 213 00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:25,280 Speaker 4: I sell five hundred carry North Carolina. Okay, I'm up 214 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:28,840 Speaker 4: for fifteen minutes, just a front sold out. If I 215 00:08:28,920 --> 00:08:31,360 Speaker 4: sold out A mean spars, Yeah spars. We can hear 216 00:08:31,760 --> 00:08:33,959 Speaker 4: an older couple ten minutes. 217 00:08:33,720 --> 00:08:34,840 Speaker 1: In dislikes it. 218 00:08:34,960 --> 00:08:38,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, they start packing up when you bomb in a 219 00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 4: room that's that big, you see them leave for a 220 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:41,520 Speaker 4: very long time. 221 00:08:41,640 --> 00:08:41,840 Speaker 3: Yeah. 222 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:45,199 Speaker 4: So I'm standing there six minutes, there's still she has 223 00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,439 Speaker 4: all her stuff out of her purse. Yeah, he's putting 224 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:48,240 Speaker 4: her coat over shoulders. 225 00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:51,040 Speaker 1: I can't not pay attention, and I'm trying to your 226 00:08:51,120 --> 00:08:55,280 Speaker 1: mom because wow, what are you thinking about? 227 00:08:55,960 --> 00:09:01,199 Speaker 4: Oops, that's why you're so hung you walked in. Youre like, God, 228 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:04,320 Speaker 4: I am famished, I'm I'm exhausted from. 229 00:09:04,160 --> 00:09:12,000 Speaker 2: Finally, my mom backflips. What's this? I'm so add I'm hungry. 230 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:12,480 Speaker 4: I'm hungry. 231 00:09:12,559 --> 00:09:13,760 Speaker 1: Start sucking on a wire. 232 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:18,560 Speaker 4: I'm hungry. Earliest bombs my first set ever I bombed. 233 00:09:18,640 --> 00:09:20,000 Speaker 2: Have your bombed in front of your parents? 234 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 3: Oh? 235 00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:20,760 Speaker 1: Yeah? 236 00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:22,320 Speaker 2: Really that's the worst. 237 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,080 Speaker 4: It's because then they're like, yeah, why are you doing this? 238 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 4: You fucking failure. 239 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:27,840 Speaker 2: I rather bomb in front of a fucking soccer stadium 240 00:09:27,960 --> 00:09:30,400 Speaker 2: in Cape Town, South Africa than bomb in. 241 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:31,040 Speaker 3: Front of my parents. 242 00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:32,000 Speaker 4: Have you bombed your parents? 243 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,760 Speaker 1: I think I've only bombed in front of my parents. 244 00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:35,320 Speaker 1: I don't think I ever did well in front of 245 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:39,120 Speaker 1: my parents. They mean, there's such an immense pressure. Is 246 00:09:39,160 --> 00:09:41,520 Speaker 1: like the comedy lab of Pressures or Melrose whatever, it's 247 00:09:41,520 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 1: called improper lab. Yeah, you're the health department should condemn 248 00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,400 Speaker 1: the improp we should get. 249 00:09:48,440 --> 00:09:50,200 Speaker 4: If everyone's listening right now, the Health department to go. 250 00:09:50,280 --> 00:09:52,240 Speaker 4: They sell no food. You've got to go. 251 00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 1: When they were check it out. 252 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,559 Speaker 4: Next time I go, just hide them in my ass. 253 00:09:58,080 --> 00:10:00,720 Speaker 4: Oh my ass up only bombing. No, they've seen me. 254 00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:02,840 Speaker 4: I used to. There used to be every every like 255 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 4: the first five years I bombed, and they'd come all 256 00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:06,680 Speaker 4: time I used. I started an improv too, so they'd 257 00:10:06,679 --> 00:10:11,800 Speaker 4: come watch me. That's really improv. I saw improv recently. 258 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 4: Ere Yeah, I just went to an improv show last 259 00:10:14,080 --> 00:10:16,360 Speaker 4: week for my friend. I was being nice, yeah, never again, 260 00:10:16,679 --> 00:10:17,960 Speaker 4: I'll never go to a pro show. 261 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:18,320 Speaker 1: You can't. 262 00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:20,920 Speaker 4: And somebody recognized me and then they were like is 263 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:23,040 Speaker 4: that Steph told and my friends was on the show. 264 00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:24,720 Speaker 4: She's like, don't look at her because she's not gonna laugh. 265 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:28,040 Speaker 4: I was like this, pissed that I was there second 266 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,960 Speaker 4: row arms cross asking for suggestions, guys, like for you, 267 00:10:31,160 --> 00:10:32,920 Speaker 4: you have something to say, and I was like, no, 268 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:36,320 Speaker 4: I'm good. I'm not giving you guys suggestions. You're bad. 269 00:10:36,400 --> 00:10:37,600 Speaker 1: Improv is so bad. 270 00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:40,640 Speaker 4: Improv's way worse than somebody bombing during stand up, isn't it? 271 00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:41,120 Speaker 4: It has to be. 272 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:44,760 Speaker 1: It's like insane. You feel like your brain's bleeding, like 273 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:48,080 Speaker 1: you like overdose on robotest and you're like, what is this? 274 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:51,480 Speaker 1: It's like German art house theater. Oh yeah, what is 275 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:53,960 Speaker 1: going on? And you can't believe it. 276 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,200 Speaker 4: No, people are laughing because they bring friends. It's all 277 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:56,880 Speaker 4: like bringer stuff. 278 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,480 Speaker 1: I've seen one with the only ones I've scene or 279 00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:04,640 Speaker 1: just zero laugh, bomb faster, horrible. I rarely have seen 280 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,400 Speaker 1: like ones that are like, yeah, blowing the roof. 281 00:11:07,160 --> 00:11:09,719 Speaker 4: Off, especially like knwhere was like a school show and I. 282 00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:13,000 Speaker 2: Was horrendous to crime against your manner? 283 00:11:13,760 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 1: Close it up, close up. What about bombing on a date? 284 00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:19,880 Speaker 1: I remember me and Sarah Squirm ran into you at 285 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,560 Speaker 1: the airport in like fucking Sydney, Australia or something. 286 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:23,640 Speaker 4: It was in Vancouver. 287 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:26,200 Speaker 1: Was Vancouver. It was hammerd Yeah, you were hammered and 288 00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:27,200 Speaker 1: you were like on a bender. 289 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,040 Speaker 2: You're like fun some guy in the bushes at a. 290 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:31,760 Speaker 4: Wedding like you to die off and eat me out 291 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:33,760 Speaker 4: on a bench. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no I was. 292 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:38,400 Speaker 4: I saw you, guys. I bombed that wedding. I okay, 293 00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:42,720 Speaker 4: you know that actually actually okay, so I went off. 294 00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 4: It was at the end of the night and me 295 00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:45,480 Speaker 4: and him were clearly the other people that weren't getting fox, 296 00:11:45,520 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 4: so we literally did. 297 00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:49,160 Speaker 1: The whole I guess like everybody else is gonna suck us. 298 00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:51,199 Speaker 4: So we went up to this bench where. 299 00:11:51,200 --> 00:11:54,320 Speaker 2: Like he wasn't George clue. 300 00:11:54,960 --> 00:12:01,920 Speaker 4: He was aged like a bad It wasn't good. So 301 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:03,680 Speaker 4: I took him out to this bench because we didn't 302 00:12:03,679 --> 00:12:07,600 Speaker 4: have a room that we were romantic tip of the 303 00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:10,560 Speaker 4: tip of the hill. So I jerked him off, meet 304 00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:13,920 Speaker 4: me out. I'm not gonna fuck him. I'm not a pig, 305 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:16,760 Speaker 4: So we go. So the worst one was I was 306 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 4: so drunk and I was like, there's a little hill. 307 00:12:18,559 --> 00:12:20,120 Speaker 4: I'm like it was gonna be funny if we rolled 308 00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:21,600 Speaker 4: down the hill together. And he's like what And then 309 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:23,760 Speaker 4: I rolled down the hill and he watched disgusted. 310 00:12:24,000 --> 00:12:25,160 Speaker 1: He's like, I say this one pussy. 311 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:29,520 Speaker 4: I rolled down covered and grass. So yeah, I was 312 00:12:29,559 --> 00:12:35,720 Speaker 4: just fucking flipping full dress, rolled all the way to 313 00:12:35,760 --> 00:12:39,800 Speaker 4: the airport. I almost should have. 314 00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:40,720 Speaker 1: We go back. 315 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:42,920 Speaker 4: So everyone's in like the Honeymoon's wee throw partying and 316 00:12:43,040 --> 00:12:44,280 Speaker 4: we're the only two people not there. I think he 317 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,120 Speaker 4: was part of the wedding party. So we come back 318 00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:49,000 Speaker 4: in and I'm covered in grass, soaking wet, and I 319 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:50,000 Speaker 4: was like, where were you guys? 320 00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:53,360 Speaker 1: I go I just jerked off your buddy on the bench, you. 321 00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 4: Know, for everybody, whole room movie is God disgusted, disgusted, 322 00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:01,920 Speaker 4: not one laugh. And I was like, I'm bombing. I'm bombing. 323 00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:03,280 Speaker 4: And then I saw you. I was so drunk at 324 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 4: the airport. Holy fuck, I can't live on a plane. 325 00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:05,920 Speaker 3: You just bombed. 326 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,880 Speaker 2: You seem like you were like walking on sunshine. 327 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:08,080 Speaker 1: Still drunk. 328 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:13,200 Speaker 4: You're like, wow, I think you're like, can I have renumber? 329 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:16,440 Speaker 4: You're mentally like this, I think something. It was like 330 00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:18,840 Speaker 4: a comedy show, like in a hallway at an airport. 331 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:22,600 Speaker 1: I was like, I was so enter black. Turned this 332 00:13:22,679 --> 00:13:26,400 Speaker 1: guy off, he push the arrow down the hill. Now 333 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:26,840 Speaker 1: I'm here. 334 00:13:27,160 --> 00:13:28,160 Speaker 2: I was like, it was like. 335 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,520 Speaker 1: Literally was first sip of coffee. I was like wait what. 336 00:13:35,120 --> 00:13:36,319 Speaker 4: I was so mentally ill. 337 00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:39,120 Speaker 2: No, And then me and Sarah were like, you're. 338 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:41,439 Speaker 4: The fucking best you here, like this woman's sick. No. 339 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,160 Speaker 1: We were like we were like Obsessedly, we were already 340 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:45,360 Speaker 1: we already loved your comedy, but. 341 00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:49,600 Speaker 2: We were like obsessed after that. She's fucking living it, man, Oh. 342 00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,240 Speaker 4: I'm living it. I had sex this weekend in Tampa. 343 00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:51,800 Speaker 4: I'm living it. 344 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 2: I'm just do you get laid every show? 345 00:13:53,640 --> 00:13:54,760 Speaker 1: No? I get laid on the road. 346 00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:56,880 Speaker 4: I can't. I can't pull anything in LA. I'm a 347 00:13:56,880 --> 00:13:59,760 Speaker 4: fucking inside out toad and Lo I was swearing of God. 348 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:03,640 Speaker 4: I honestly can't get laid here go so NonStop. I'm 349 00:14:03,679 --> 00:14:05,559 Speaker 4: bombing on. I'm bombing on the apps out here. I'll 350 00:14:05,559 --> 00:14:07,800 Speaker 4: tell you that I'm bombing. I'm bombing back the apps. 351 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:10,160 Speaker 4: Is the mover or I r L? I try r 352 00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:10,520 Speaker 4: L too. 353 00:14:10,559 --> 00:14:10,760 Speaker 1: Nothing. 354 00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,000 Speaker 4: I'm not getting ship out here, get stood up getting guys. 355 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,160 Speaker 4: Give me the lame excuses l A L A dating. 356 00:14:15,880 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 1: It's not it's not indicative. 357 00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:18,000 Speaker 3: Of the rest of the world. 358 00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:19,520 Speaker 4: That's why we go to Florida. 359 00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 2: I had three Sony, you got threesome in Miami. 360 00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:24,760 Speaker 1: Also a bomb that too. I bombed that. 361 00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:26,640 Speaker 4: One of the guys tapped out real soon. 362 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:28,600 Speaker 1: I was like, oh. 363 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 3: Wait. 364 00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:32,640 Speaker 1: It was like, you guys are all making out, and 365 00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:34,240 Speaker 1: then he was like, oh geez. 366 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:36,600 Speaker 4: It started. Yes, it started as the one guy making out. 367 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,280 Speaker 4: The other guy came in and the one guy immediately 368 00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:40,200 Speaker 4: left and then he lied on the floor. 369 00:14:40,280 --> 00:14:42,760 Speaker 2: Well maybe he didn't want to see another guy's peep. 370 00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:43,880 Speaker 1: He saw it. 371 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:44,720 Speaker 4: He didn't leave the room. 372 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:45,520 Speaker 2: Oh, he sat. 373 00:14:45,760 --> 00:14:52,840 Speaker 4: It was like but no, he barely watched. He was 374 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:55,080 Speaker 4: lying on the on the on the ground, had a pillow. 375 00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:57,120 Speaker 4: He was getting all comfy on the ground on his phone. 376 00:14:57,600 --> 00:14:58,400 Speaker 3: Are you are you? 377 00:14:58,840 --> 00:14:59,920 Speaker 2: Are you sleeping with the home. 378 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:01,880 Speaker 3: Nowhere? 379 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:03,280 Speaker 4: Beggars aren't chooses. 380 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:04,000 Speaker 1: Okay, you know what. 381 00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:06,200 Speaker 4: They cleaned their dick before. I make sure they clean 382 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:07,680 Speaker 4: it before I asked them. 383 00:15:07,720 --> 00:15:08,200 Speaker 1: I watched. 384 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,440 Speaker 4: I washed it for them. I watched. Can you imagine? 385 00:15:10,560 --> 00:15:12,200 Speaker 4: I get that? That's what I'm like, Oh, fuck you, 386 00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:13,760 Speaker 4: but I must wash the penis first. 387 00:15:14,520 --> 00:15:16,760 Speaker 2: So the road you're cleaning up, I'm cleaning up on 388 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:17,680 Speaker 2: the what's your town? 389 00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:19,760 Speaker 1: What's your town that you're like the fucking queen of 390 00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:24,160 Speaker 1: the town. It might be Icago, like a Midwest. I 391 00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:26,560 Speaker 1: feel like Toronto and Chicago have like a love. 392 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,880 Speaker 4: I'm from Toronto. I know you're from but I did 393 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:32,920 Speaker 4: not getting in Toronto either. Literally, I haven't fucked in Chicago. 394 00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:34,720 Speaker 2: Florida's Florida word. 395 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:37,320 Speaker 4: I'm picking up these fucking weird the what's your type? 396 00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:41,320 Speaker 4: I'm I'm open, it's the whole game. Yeah, yeah, we're not. 397 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:46,400 Speaker 4: We're not putting thighs on this. We got the no, no, no, 398 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:50,000 Speaker 4: we let letting them all in letting too many in No, 399 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:51,680 Speaker 4: we're letting some disgusting pigs in there. 400 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 1: But with like a giant like m M, A fighter 401 00:15:56,040 --> 00:15:58,920 Speaker 1: kind of guy. I want to be tossed around. 402 00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:03,760 Speaker 4: He's speaking of suplex Oh my god, you want to 403 00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,400 Speaker 4: die laughing. Okay, So this this wrestler named Big Bill, 404 00:16:07,440 --> 00:16:09,320 Speaker 4: he's me ww. I asked him to do a sketch 405 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,840 Speaker 4: with me the other day in fucking in Florida as 406 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:13,480 Speaker 4: I root through my purse for four and a half 407 00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:14,160 Speaker 4: fucking hours. 408 00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 1: No, no, I need to show you. 409 00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,680 Speaker 4: This is me getting fucking choke slammed. He had a fiance, 410 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,560 Speaker 4: because if he didn't, I'll tell you what I would 411 00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:23,000 Speaker 4: have I would have made some serious moves. No, I 412 00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:24,880 Speaker 4: got fucking fully choke slammed. 413 00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:26,920 Speaker 1: With Wait in a sexual way? 414 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 4: No, no, no, it was just weird doing a video. 415 00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:31,240 Speaker 4: Check out the airtime I get on this choke slam. Wait, 416 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:33,400 Speaker 4: I'm what is this? 417 00:16:33,840 --> 00:16:37,000 Speaker 2: Can you send that to the producer? Can we wait? Yeah, 418 00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:38,040 Speaker 2: that wasn't a sexual thing. 419 00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,600 Speaker 4: No, no, no, I'm doing the stupid video with him. But 420 00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:42,600 Speaker 4: I wanted to make a look sexual. But it's him. 421 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:46,400 Speaker 4: It's just like a stupid It's just a character thing. 422 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:48,160 Speaker 4: It's a stupid character of Marcy. And I want to 423 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 4: pretend that I was trying to. 424 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:51,720 Speaker 1: Fuck that guy. His name is big Bill is there. 425 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:55,880 Speaker 1: He's a wrestler. So you were TikTok. I'm very old. 426 00:16:57,800 --> 00:17:00,840 Speaker 1: Are you trying to that guy? I will know he's married, 427 00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:04,040 Speaker 1: but if he wasn't married, I would have you consider. 428 00:17:03,680 --> 00:17:06,200 Speaker 4: It, considerate. I was soaking wet, I want to slip 429 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:10,399 Speaker 4: off the back. Insane. Oh, I was slippery slops on 430 00:17:10,440 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 4: that fucking Hailton garden. And that's why they called the garden. 431 00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:14,639 Speaker 4: You gotta water the grass. 432 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,199 Speaker 1: It was your celebrity crush if you could, if you 433 00:17:17,200 --> 00:17:18,800 Speaker 1: could waltz under the silver screen. 434 00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 4: John Ham, I want John Sam, John Sam. I want 435 00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:24,480 Speaker 4: John Sam. I want his Ham in and around my 436 00:17:24,480 --> 00:17:25,399 Speaker 4: body wherever he wants it. 437 00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:28,720 Speaker 1: I interviewed him once, did you, Derek and very good 438 00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:29,160 Speaker 1: looking guy. 439 00:17:30,119 --> 00:17:30,879 Speaker 4: Don't even watch that. 440 00:17:31,560 --> 00:17:35,680 Speaker 1: I saw pictures of his ticking sweatpants. Yeah, he's ringing 441 00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:38,480 Speaker 1: a fucking ding dong dinner bell. He's got my man's 442 00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 1: packing the heat. 443 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:42,200 Speaker 4: He's got a fucking box of Kleenex pants. 444 00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,560 Speaker 1: It's not big, it's you can sense he's got a 445 00:17:45,560 --> 00:17:49,080 Speaker 1: big dick. Right, it's like radiating. He's got a horn 446 00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:51,160 Speaker 1: on him. It'd be so tragic if he took off 447 00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,359 Speaker 1: his pants and it was like, like, I've seen that, 448 00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:55,560 Speaker 1: you know funny that is, yeah, what have you done 449 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:56,880 Speaker 1: when you've seen a microa. 450 00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:57,360 Speaker 4: Guy, little dick? 451 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:59,520 Speaker 1: I would I sort of laughed, you were like the 452 00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:00,760 Speaker 1: girl that to your company show. 453 00:18:01,520 --> 00:18:03,720 Speaker 4: There's this literally this one guy. This he used to 454 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:06,800 Speaker 4: be security guard at the Virgil. I'm dipping in very 455 00:18:06,800 --> 00:18:10,080 Speaker 4: close eyes. Anyways, he's very tall, and I assume why 456 00:18:10,119 --> 00:18:11,920 Speaker 4: that detail had to be and there's no reason very 457 00:18:11,920 --> 00:18:14,800 Speaker 4: close eyes. He took his pants off and I went like, 458 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,119 Speaker 4: it wasn't micro but like, you have such a big body, 459 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:18,400 Speaker 4: it's a small pinis. 460 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:19,920 Speaker 1: That's a that's a genetic crap shoot. 461 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:21,359 Speaker 4: That's why I announced that I have a big pussy. 462 00:18:21,359 --> 00:18:23,679 Speaker 4: I don't want anyone get to learn down. You come in, 463 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:24,919 Speaker 4: you know what you're getting. I'm not. 464 00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,080 Speaker 1: It's have you had the opposite experience or you took 465 00:18:27,119 --> 00:18:28,880 Speaker 1: up a guy's pants and it was like a fucking yes. 466 00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,600 Speaker 1: This guy read oh really I was a large, gigantic, 467 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:34,040 Speaker 1: big cock. Were you were you like yes? Or were 468 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:35,800 Speaker 1: you like oh night? 469 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:40,000 Speaker 4: I cracked my job, myself heeling chokes lam before I 470 00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:45,640 Speaker 4: started ready to go to start doing esophagus massages. Hold 471 00:18:45,680 --> 00:18:46,240 Speaker 4: on a second. 472 00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:47,720 Speaker 1: Were you pumped or scared? 473 00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:47,919 Speaker 4: No? 474 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:48,880 Speaker 1: I was. I was pumped. 475 00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:51,240 Speaker 4: A big pussy needs a big dick. I can't be 476 00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,200 Speaker 4: having I gotta feel some down there. 477 00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:56,720 Speaker 1: You just went because I have a friend. I won't 478 00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:58,919 Speaker 1: say her name, but she she told me she took 479 00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:01,679 Speaker 1: off a guy's pants one time and his phallus was 480 00:19:01,760 --> 00:19:05,320 Speaker 1: so large that she was like you, She goes, you 481 00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:06,960 Speaker 1: got to go home? And he goes, what do you mean? 482 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:09,120 Speaker 1: She's like, I'm not putting that anywhere in my body. 483 00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,399 Speaker 1: I can't put that anywhere in my body. There's not 484 00:19:11,760 --> 00:19:16,440 Speaker 1: a single place top to bottom in my body that will. 485 00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:18,760 Speaker 2: She made him go home. 486 00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:19,440 Speaker 1: That's hilarious. 487 00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:20,200 Speaker 2: It's gracy right. 488 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:25,199 Speaker 4: Can I get Look, she might not have room for it. 489 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:30,000 Speaker 4: I got a I've got a three car garage with 490 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:33,440 Speaker 4: a little upstairs attic. I got some room, baby, baby, 491 00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:36,360 Speaker 4: he's got some room in there. Bulgary, and it's wine set. 492 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:50,800 Speaker 3: With aerdre with aericdre. 493 00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:53,280 Speaker 1: What's the worst bomb you've ever seen? Have you know 494 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,879 Speaker 1: that that you weren't it wasn't you bombing? But was 495 00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:56,800 Speaker 1: there somebody? 496 00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:57,560 Speaker 2: Have you ever seen it? 497 00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,399 Speaker 4: I made sure I asked my friend. I can tell 498 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:02,560 Speaker 4: a story because I read the email. My friend Jessica Michelle, 499 00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:05,159 Speaker 4: who's hilarious. She bombed at the store a couple of 500 00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:08,160 Speaker 4: weeks ago, pretty bad, pretty pretty brutal. And she's dating 501 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:11,320 Speaker 4: this guy and he's super nice, he's super sweet, and 502 00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:14,679 Speaker 4: we're after all outside and she's like, oh, that was 503 00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:18,040 Speaker 4: that was pretty rough and he's like, no, honestly, He's like, honestly, jess, 504 00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:21,840 Speaker 4: people were laughing and like he's like going on. She's 505 00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,080 Speaker 4: like kind of like, oh, okay, and he's like, honestly, Jess, 506 00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:25,800 Speaker 4: I would tell you. And I'm like, I hate to 507 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:26,639 Speaker 4: burst your bubble. 508 00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:28,040 Speaker 3: You ate shit? 509 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,760 Speaker 4: I go, you just bombed really fucking bad. And she's 510 00:20:31,800 --> 00:20:33,720 Speaker 4: like what and he's like staff. I'm like, I'm not 511 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 4: going to sit here and I'm not trying to fuck her. 512 00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:37,719 Speaker 4: You you can be a nice boyfriend, but I'm like, 513 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,399 Speaker 4: you gotta tell her when she eat ship. 514 00:20:39,280 --> 00:20:41,320 Speaker 1: And she just ate ship. 515 00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:43,800 Speaker 4: Like it was pretty brutal. I mean, but she's hilarious. 516 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:45,800 Speaker 4: So it was like we all all have our bombs stuff. 517 00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:47,760 Speaker 4: But it was just like so cute that he was like, Oh, 518 00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:50,440 Speaker 4: it wasn't that bad. I'm like, not a single person. 519 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:51,000 Speaker 1: Laughed and then like. 520 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:56,040 Speaker 2: Cat, I think, I. 521 00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,199 Speaker 4: Think you can. I think if someone I don't know 522 00:20:59,359 --> 00:21:01,440 Speaker 4: just started dating, no, it's been a year. 523 00:21:01,359 --> 00:21:02,840 Speaker 2: I would want my girlfriend to lie to me and 524 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:04,000 Speaker 2: just it's not that bad. 525 00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,720 Speaker 1: Anybody, everybody else can tell me the truth, but my 526 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:09,679 Speaker 1: girlfriend I would want, like I would want some sugarcoating. 527 00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:11,280 Speaker 4: Okay, I get, I mean, I guess. 528 00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:14,320 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know what bombing is the only 529 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:15,520 Speaker 2: response you need. 530 00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:16,120 Speaker 3: I don't need. 531 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:18,960 Speaker 1: I don't need an outside person to tell me, oh, 532 00:21:18,960 --> 00:21:21,480 Speaker 1: it's okay, Oh it's not that bad. Oh it's a bomb. 533 00:21:22,080 --> 00:21:24,040 Speaker 2: It's crystal clear that it's a bomb. 534 00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:27,600 Speaker 1: But the audience, an audience full of strangers, has let 535 00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:30,640 Speaker 1: me know very loudly that it's a bomb. I don't 536 00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:33,000 Speaker 1: need to check in with anyone else. I don't really 537 00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:33,359 Speaker 1: need to. 538 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,200 Speaker 4: Comics I think are delusional and they. 539 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,119 Speaker 1: Like, yeah, I think some comics are, and they're and 540 00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:38,840 Speaker 1: they're always not good comics. 541 00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:40,920 Speaker 2: Yes, well they are. 542 00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:44,440 Speaker 1: They have like laugh blindness or something, because I think 543 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:46,600 Speaker 1: they're in like a heightened state of consciousness. When they're 544 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,679 Speaker 1: up there, or they're just so bad they're used to bombing, 545 00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,960 Speaker 1: like bombing is the norm, and they think it's good. 546 00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:53,000 Speaker 1: It's never somebody who's great at comic. 547 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:56,720 Speaker 4: No, it's I. Literally it's crazy. If I anytime I 548 00:21:56,760 --> 00:22:00,240 Speaker 4: do like remotely bad, even if it's like some else, 549 00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,880 Speaker 4: those comments was a great set of like it wasn't 550 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:02,639 Speaker 4: delight in my face. 551 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:03,480 Speaker 1: Don't lie to me. 552 00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:04,879 Speaker 4: I know what I'm doing up there. 553 00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:07,800 Speaker 1: I can sense. I can sense the bombs. Yeah, I can. 554 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:10,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, you can totally sense, you can totally. It's crystal 555 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:11,439 Speaker 2: clear to me. 556 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:15,080 Speaker 1: It's crystal clear to me when it's it's not even 557 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:17,879 Speaker 1: just a bomb, when it's like a mediocre or a 558 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:20,199 Speaker 1: medium set. I've said in the middle of set, it's like, 559 00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,399 Speaker 1: I know this sets a C minus. I know this 560 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,120 Speaker 1: isn't my best hurt bombing, but I know it ain't 561 00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:28,119 Speaker 1: an A plus. I know you know you know, And 562 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:31,239 Speaker 1: if you don't know, you shouldn't do comedy because that's 563 00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:34,320 Speaker 1: what it's like, the most important part of your job 564 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,639 Speaker 1: is to know where you are at you. If you 565 00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:38,879 Speaker 1: can't figure that out, it's your job to be observant. 566 00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:44,280 Speaker 1: And if you can't observe yourself immediately, then you are delusional. 567 00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:45,920 Speaker 2: A k hole. 568 00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,880 Speaker 4: I mean there's everyone. Then that's half the sceno here. 569 00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,720 Speaker 1: In k hole. I want to know though not just 570 00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,760 Speaker 1: like hey, I saw my friend bomb. I went like specifics, 571 00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,479 Speaker 1: do you have anything any details? Like I saw a 572 00:22:57,520 --> 00:23:00,560 Speaker 1: bottle get thrown at somebody. I saw a common like dropping. 573 00:23:00,640 --> 00:23:04,680 Speaker 4: Oh yes, m I gotta go to one. I gotta 574 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:04,919 Speaker 4: go to one. 575 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:05,120 Speaker 1: Okay. 576 00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:06,280 Speaker 4: I don't know if I say my buddy Patrick, I 577 00:23:06,280 --> 00:23:07,560 Speaker 4: want to say his last name in case he hates this. 578 00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:10,760 Speaker 4: He oh, this is Montreal years ago, Face called the 579 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,920 Speaker 4: Comedy Works. He comes in from doing this this show 580 00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,320 Speaker 4: across the street, a burrito at a brito joint. He 581 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,280 Speaker 4: comes in smug, he's got a strut. He walks in, 582 00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:21,920 Speaker 4: he goes killed one show, about to go up there, 583 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,639 Speaker 4: kill the next one. Want a party and he's like 584 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:26,359 Speaker 4: on one and I'm like okay, and I'm like, he 585 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:27,920 Speaker 4: hasn't been in this room seeing how they are whatever. 586 00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:30,000 Speaker 4: He goes up, does this big wave. As he walks up, 587 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:30,400 Speaker 4: people are. 588 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:31,359 Speaker 1: Like, who the fuck is this guy? 589 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:34,320 Speaker 4: Gets up, starts going on about Lord knows what, some 590 00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:36,240 Speaker 4: story about some girl in his house and he goes, 591 00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:42,280 Speaker 4: this fucking dyke, this very butch lesbian in the crowd 592 00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:46,280 Speaker 4: goes what he goes, I said, this fucking dyke says 593 00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:48,520 Speaker 4: it again, and I was like, buddy, buddy, buddy, buddy. 594 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:54,080 Speaker 4: The silence. He keeps doing the story. He keeps doing 595 00:23:54,119 --> 00:23:56,399 Speaker 4: the story and I'm like, buddy, I'm keeps saying it. 596 00:23:56,480 --> 00:24:00,920 Speaker 4: He's like, anyways, this bitch and I'm like, the bombs 597 00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:04,000 Speaker 4: so fucking bad, walks off, still strutting. I don't know 598 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:04,520 Speaker 4: how he's just trudy. 599 00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:06,720 Speaker 1: He goes, I'm gonna need a shot after that one. 600 00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:08,000 Speaker 1: You just bomb me. 601 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:10,399 Speaker 4: But that was still so smug. And then I saw 602 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:11,960 Speaker 4: him eat a poutine in the snow after that. 603 00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,359 Speaker 1: He was so drunk. He was eating a wet poutine. 604 00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:15,399 Speaker 1: I'm like, we have to leave right now. 605 00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:18,119 Speaker 4: It was I'll never forget how smug he was going on, 606 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:24,359 Speaker 4: just like the amount of confidence. And he doesn't he 607 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,520 Speaker 4: wasn't that night. He's a fun guy, but that was 608 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,280 Speaker 4: like insane. The yell that I also didn't even need 609 00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,879 Speaker 4: to be in the story. He's like one of those 610 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:32,639 Speaker 4: stories are you could have been like my roommate. He 611 00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:34,720 Speaker 4: just hasn't yelled at I'm like, oh, not a good word. 612 00:24:34,760 --> 00:24:36,720 Speaker 4: And that was years ago with when people are still 613 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:39,080 Speaker 4: saying that word and it was still kind of acceptable. 614 00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:39,520 Speaker 1: I don't know. 615 00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:42,320 Speaker 4: I was threatened, my biggest I was threatened in Milwaukee. 616 00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:44,440 Speaker 4: A guy told me he had two guns on him 617 00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:45,640 Speaker 4: and he waited for me out front of the show 618 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:48,159 Speaker 4: because I pissed him off. He was fucking talking and 619 00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:49,720 Speaker 4: he wouldn't shut the fuck up. So I like kind 620 00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:52,000 Speaker 4: of started riffing with him. Yeah, and then he wouldn't stop, 621 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:53,560 Speaker 4: and I was like, I asked me different work. He's 622 00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:55,200 Speaker 4: like an inner city landlord. I had this clip online 623 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:57,359 Speaker 4: because it's like kind of viral because it and people 624 00:24:57,359 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 4: start booing him. Obviously it was a crowd the land 625 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:02,679 Speaker 4: word and everyone's like boo. I'm like this hilarious. And 626 00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,000 Speaker 4: then so I gotta make fun of him. I do 627 00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,160 Speaker 4: a riff for I was like, I'm like, he mentioned 628 00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:08,879 Speaker 4: he has two guns on the hip one of my 629 00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:10,760 Speaker 4: glove compartment. I was like, why do you need a 630 00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:12,160 Speaker 4: fucking a gun? 631 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:12,679 Speaker 1: Was the landlord. 632 00:25:12,680 --> 00:25:14,760 Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm like, January second, you're on the guy's temple, 633 00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,880 Speaker 4: Like where's I'm like, that's looking crazy. So now I'm 634 00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:20,760 Speaker 4: getting laughs and he's annoyed. So at one point he's like, well, 635 00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:22,119 Speaker 4: got the guns on me, and I'm like okay. So 636 00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:24,240 Speaker 4: I'm like trying to go to set and then he 637 00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:25,800 Speaker 4: says something like he yells from me. I go what, 638 00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:28,800 Speaker 4: and he goes, you better fucking watch yourself. And then 639 00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:29,640 Speaker 4: I'm like, murder. 640 00:25:29,920 --> 00:25:31,000 Speaker 1: You gonna come in a homicide? 641 00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:31,240 Speaker 3: Yeah? 642 00:25:31,240 --> 00:25:32,800 Speaker 4: And I go what, And then his girlfriend goes, you 643 00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:34,840 Speaker 4: heard him, You better fucking watch it, and I was like, 644 00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:36,959 Speaker 4: I look at the clock. I'm like, I'm not doing 645 00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:38,360 Speaker 4: other fifteen minutes. I'm getting the fuck off. 646 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:40,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, so I like, wrap it up, I get off. 647 00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:40,920 Speaker 1: I'm back. 648 00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:43,119 Speaker 4: He's freaking the funk out telling the security and I'm like, 649 00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:45,239 Speaker 4: oh yeah. They go outside. He's outside the front door, 650 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:47,400 Speaker 4: is pacing like what, and I'm like. 651 00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:49,520 Speaker 1: What you're gonna You're gonna kill men? 652 00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:49,879 Speaker 3: Kill me? 653 00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:53,040 Speaker 1: It killed a comedian and then ruin the rest of 654 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:53,680 Speaker 1: your own life. 655 00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:55,120 Speaker 2: It is making a joke. 656 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,199 Speaker 4: I guess you wouldn't shut the fuck up to It 657 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:00,320 Speaker 4: was psychotic. It was so Harry. 658 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:03,560 Speaker 2: I'm glad we hand guns to everybody in this fuck. 659 00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:05,880 Speaker 4: And here you go, congratulations, you go kill step total 660 00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:06,159 Speaker 4: of this. 661 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:08,200 Speaker 1: It's terrifying, sucks. What'd you do? 662 00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,000 Speaker 4: I didn't do a mengry then I'll tell you that 663 00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:13,880 Speaker 4: I stayed in the green room for a couple more minutes. 664 00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:14,720 Speaker 4: So I was pretty freaked out. 665 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,560 Speaker 1: How did you get back to your hotel? The club 666 00:26:16,560 --> 00:26:18,240 Speaker 1: owner drove me. I would have called the police. 667 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:20,240 Speaker 4: No, I was pretty freaked out. That's the first time 668 00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:21,879 Speaker 4: I got that scared. They made sure they banned him, 669 00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:23,080 Speaker 4: so they had his credit card and everything, so he 670 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:24,119 Speaker 4: can't go back to the club. But I was like, 671 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:26,080 Speaker 4: it was really fucking and I was scared to post 672 00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:27,840 Speaker 4: the clip because I'm like, you can't see him, you 673 00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:28,280 Speaker 4: can hear him. 674 00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:29,280 Speaker 1: But I was like, I don't want him to see 675 00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:30,000 Speaker 1: this and get mad at me. 676 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,600 Speaker 4: I was like, so when I go back to Alwaukie, 677 00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:35,000 Speaker 4: I have to make sure that guy's notre Milwaukee. 678 00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:35,359 Speaker 3: I don't know. 679 00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:37,359 Speaker 2: I know it was bad, I don't know. I know, 680 00:26:37,840 --> 00:26:40,520 Speaker 2: like ten years I'm cool off, damn it. 681 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:43,399 Speaker 1: I had a guy recently at a bar in fucking 682 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,119 Speaker 1: Highland Park. I was like, I was with some friends. 683 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,760 Speaker 1: This wasn't even a comedy show, but he was definitely 684 00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:54,840 Speaker 1: nuts and violent, like he was just his energy. He 685 00:26:54,920 --> 00:26:58,159 Speaker 1: was pacing around and being weird to everyone. I just 686 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,960 Speaker 1: felt like this guy was bad fucking news. I sat 687 00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:03,280 Speaker 1: at the corner of the bar and he's I'm on 688 00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:05,880 Speaker 1: like a ninety degree angle. He's like here and I'm 689 00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:10,200 Speaker 1: here corner of the bar, and then he was saying 690 00:27:10,359 --> 00:27:12,480 Speaker 1: strange stuff to me. I could tell he wanted to 691 00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,919 Speaker 1: get in the conversation, but his energy was like like 692 00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:17,959 Speaker 1: twitchy and like eh. And then like I went up 693 00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:19,760 Speaker 1: to the girl I was dating at the time. I 694 00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:23,439 Speaker 1: was like, maybe if I like make out with she 695 00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:26,640 Speaker 1: was my girlfriend, but we just started making out. Maybe 696 00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:28,879 Speaker 1: if I make out with my boo, he'll get a 697 00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:32,240 Speaker 1: hint and like not try to engage. So I like 698 00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:34,679 Speaker 1: went over to her and I was like being like 699 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,159 Speaker 1: sweetie and like gave her a kiss. And then like 700 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:39,880 Speaker 1: he interjected and he was like you're not gonna shake 701 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:41,960 Speaker 1: my hand or something, and I was like, oh no, 702 00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:45,800 Speaker 1: here we go. And then I was like like everything 703 00:27:45,880 --> 00:27:48,640 Speaker 1: went calm, you know when like fight flight or freeze. 704 00:27:48,920 --> 00:27:50,320 Speaker 1: Everything like slowed down. 705 00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:50,840 Speaker 3: In my mind. 706 00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:52,919 Speaker 1: I was like this guy's fucking nuts. 707 00:27:53,320 --> 00:27:54,359 Speaker 2: He could have a knife. 708 00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:57,560 Speaker 1: It was just like nothing made sense either, Like I 709 00:27:57,640 --> 00:27:59,600 Speaker 1: hadn't talked to him. I had no idea he was, 710 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:01,679 Speaker 1: so I just like looked at the bartender. I go, 711 00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:05,080 Speaker 1: I'm going to call the police, tell the security. This 712 00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 1: guy's about to attack me. And then like his his 713 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:10,800 Speaker 1: brain short circuited, and I called. I picked up the 714 00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:13,440 Speaker 1: phone and putting nine one one on speed. I go, hey, 715 00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:17,080 Speaker 1: I'm at such and such address. This guy's threatening to 716 00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:20,679 Speaker 1: do me and my girlfriend physical harm. Uh, And I 717 00:28:20,840 --> 00:28:22,800 Speaker 1: like and then he was like short circuited. He was 718 00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:25,400 Speaker 1: like I was looking for a fight, but this guy 719 00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:28,960 Speaker 1: is using like different tactics then I'm used to or something. 720 00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:31,880 Speaker 1: And he just walked away. He just like got up 721 00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,200 Speaker 1: and like slammed his drink and like be lined out 722 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,840 Speaker 1: of here. And then I asked somebody, I go, I go, 723 00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:40,520 Speaker 1: was that your buddy? So somebody I knew that was 724 00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,640 Speaker 1: like he was hovering next to you earlier. She goes, oh, no, 725 00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,160 Speaker 1: he comes in here all the time. That guy's psychopath. 726 00:28:46,560 --> 00:28:47,200 Speaker 1: Get rid of him. 727 00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:50,160 Speaker 2: All dangerous. 728 00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:52,280 Speaker 4: No, we can't be having dangerous people crazy. 729 00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:53,560 Speaker 1: It's fucking crazy. 730 00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,960 Speaker 2: But that feeling sucks. I hate that ship. 731 00:28:57,240 --> 00:28:57,840 Speaker 3: I hate that sh. 732 00:28:58,080 --> 00:28:59,360 Speaker 4: When you're on stage because I was like, this guy 733 00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:01,360 Speaker 4: could shoot me right now. I'm standing here a big 734 00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 4: purple jumpsuit like Barnie and Friends. But you can easily 735 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:11,600 Speaker 4: get me. 736 00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:11,320 Speaker 3: With a Recodrey. 737 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:23,080 Speaker 1: With Adre Oh, I have one for the was wasted 738 00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:24,200 Speaker 1: on stage? 739 00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:31,440 Speaker 4: Okay, I had worse. I got. I got worse than wasted. 740 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:32,480 Speaker 1: On Propofilo was on M D M A. Oh yeah, 741 00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:33,320 Speaker 1: that's not good. 742 00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:35,280 Speaker 4: I've been drunk on stage. 743 00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:39,080 Speaker 2: I've done okay, I was. I didn't do well. 744 00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:42,760 Speaker 4: I see I did not have a blast. I did 745 00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:45,719 Speaker 4: not know. Okay. I was hosting this competition again in Toronto. 746 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:52,240 Speaker 4: Disclosure was in town Love Disclosure, Love to Take. It's 747 00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:55,320 Speaker 4: so cool, so such a good song. So they're sucking great. 748 00:29:55,360 --> 00:29:57,080 Speaker 4: So I got My sister was there. It was for 749 00:29:57,160 --> 00:29:58,640 Speaker 4: a birthday, so I was like, okay, I'm like, I'm 750 00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:00,160 Speaker 4: going to host the show. At the end of the show, 751 00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:02,800 Speaker 4: I'm like, they're doing some tally for votes. I host it. 752 00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:04,960 Speaker 4: I'm like, I'll do like five minutes, we'll take the 753 00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:06,719 Speaker 4: M and then we'll leave. I don't know, but I 754 00:30:06,760 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 4: have to do thirty minutes for them to tell you 755 00:30:08,600 --> 00:30:10,600 Speaker 4: the votes. So I take the M right for the 756 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,520 Speaker 4: last comic goes on. The guy comes up to me 757 00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,800 Speaker 4: guys running and goes, hey, you're ready for your thirty. 758 00:30:15,800 --> 00:30:18,120 Speaker 4: I'm like thirty, I did twenty off the top and 759 00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 4: I'm now I'm like little boy. 760 00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:22,000 Speaker 1: I get on stage, it hits. 761 00:30:21,840 --> 00:30:23,800 Speaker 4: Like you know what he did that good moll and 762 00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,560 Speaker 4: you're like damn, and I remember I just like sinking 763 00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:29,000 Speaker 4: and it's kind of like rubbing my legs and then 764 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:32,480 Speaker 4: just all the lights became this congealed blob. There's no 765 00:30:32,520 --> 00:30:34,560 Speaker 4: way I said a joke. There's no fucking way. And 766 00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:36,200 Speaker 4: I look off stage and I just see my sister 767 00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,840 Speaker 4: just like licking her lips. Like on the side. I'm like, 768 00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,000 Speaker 4: it was the strongest Molley or had my fucking life. 769 00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,520 Speaker 4: And we both were like melting, and I was like 770 00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:45,239 Speaker 4: any minute now the votes in me tally and they 771 00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:46,720 Speaker 4: had like they let me early and got me off 772 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:48,400 Speaker 4: because I was like and then the guy was so 773 00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:51,120 Speaker 4: mad at me after He's like that was so unprofessional. 774 00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:54,600 Speaker 4: I can't believe that. I was like, shit, fucking half 775 00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:55,040 Speaker 4: an hour. 776 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:56,800 Speaker 1: Who is this guy? 777 00:30:57,040 --> 00:30:59,320 Speaker 4: This guy who changed his name three times, He's done something. 778 00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:01,120 Speaker 4: He's one of those book is in Toronto who had 779 00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:02,840 Speaker 4: had a one name and out something else. 780 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:04,400 Speaker 1: You're like, what did you do? What does he want 781 00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:08,280 Speaker 1: from you? You're tallying a thing for him. 782 00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:12,640 Speaker 4: Like fifty bucks. It's stupid. No, but it was kiss 783 00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:13,280 Speaker 4: my ass. 784 00:31:13,760 --> 00:31:14,080 Speaker 1: It was. 785 00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:14,680 Speaker 4: It was bad. 786 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:16,560 Speaker 1: It was very bad. I don't think that was bad. 787 00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,560 Speaker 1: I think that was amazing. I think I gave that 788 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:20,200 Speaker 1: that that audience will never forget that. 789 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:20,800 Speaker 4: They were like this. 790 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:24,440 Speaker 2: I saw the Sober to Molly conversion on stage. 791 00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:27,160 Speaker 4: I did coke once before I went on That was stupid. 792 00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:30,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, why, I was just like I did man it. 793 00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:32,600 Speaker 2: How did How did Robin Williams and Richard Pryor do 794 00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:33,520 Speaker 2: that all the time? 795 00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:37,240 Speaker 1: It's crazy, Like I did coke on stage like right 796 00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:39,360 Speaker 1: before I went on stage once and my heart was 797 00:31:39,480 --> 00:31:42,160 Speaker 1: beating out of my Oh yeah, And I was like 798 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:44,840 Speaker 1: this was the norm for Robin Williams and George Carlin 799 00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:49,520 Speaker 1: and Richard Pryor like free base mind was like it 800 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 1: was crazy and it was just like a tout. 801 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:52,479 Speaker 2: It was like whoop. 802 00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:56,200 Speaker 1: And I was because the stage you're already on cocaine naturally. 803 00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:57,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, because I think we both have that thing like 804 00:31:57,560 --> 00:31:59,440 Speaker 4: we go on we're fucking high energy, Like I don't 805 00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:01,960 Speaker 4: already things Unclecain every show I do, was like, what 806 00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:02,280 Speaker 4: do you want? 807 00:32:02,560 --> 00:32:05,120 Speaker 1: I'm not on I'm psychotic adrenaline. 808 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:07,760 Speaker 2: I'm on adrenaline and nerves and anxiety. 809 00:32:07,400 --> 00:32:10,440 Speaker 4: And crushing and prussure, wondering if a man of Milwaukee's 810 00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:11,360 Speaker 4: a gun and he's ready here. 811 00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:13,600 Speaker 3: Show me so to do? 812 00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:17,560 Speaker 1: Like mainline cocaine. Like those guys did how I were nuts? 813 00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:18,600 Speaker 1: They were really nuts. 814 00:32:18,840 --> 00:32:22,160 Speaker 2: They were fucking how did they live? 815 00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:24,560 Speaker 4: If I have three drinks and I started to slur them. 816 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:28,320 Speaker 1: There, I go, it's crazy, it's crazy. 817 00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:29,840 Speaker 4: You don't drink free Those stag. 818 00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:32,560 Speaker 2: Never because I don't like being sloppy. I like I 819 00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:33,800 Speaker 2: like being nervous on stage. 820 00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:36,000 Speaker 4: I have a good couple. I'm good with two two three. 821 00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,000 Speaker 1: If it's a show, I don't give a fuck about it. 822 00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:39,719 Speaker 1: I'm not doing it for pay, and I'm just like, 823 00:32:40,320 --> 00:32:42,720 Speaker 1: and I'm not even working out new stuff. I'm like, Hey, 824 00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,040 Speaker 1: I'm visiting a friend in New Orleans, but my buddy's 825 00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:45,800 Speaker 1: got a comedy show. 826 00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:46,240 Speaker 3: I'll go on. 827 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:49,080 Speaker 1: I'll do five minutes whatever. And I've been drinking Gin 828 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:52,520 Speaker 1: and Tonics all day or whatever. If it's just for funiture, 829 00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:54,720 Speaker 1: but if I'm working on new material and I really 830 00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:57,560 Speaker 1: want to know what's wrong with it, or I'm doing 831 00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,800 Speaker 1: a paid gig. If I'm doing like Unify of whatever, 832 00:33:00,840 --> 00:33:03,480 Speaker 1: wiscons or whatever, Yeah, then I want to be sharp. 833 00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:04,280 Speaker 1: I want to be sharp. 834 00:33:04,280 --> 00:33:04,560 Speaker 2: I'm not. 835 00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:08,040 Speaker 1: I'm not because I need to care that the jokes work. Yeah, 836 00:33:08,040 --> 00:33:10,080 Speaker 1: and if I'm under the influence, I don't care if 837 00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:12,280 Speaker 1: the jokes work. Really, yeah, I need to be I 838 00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:14,120 Speaker 1: need to be nervous. I need to be anxious and 839 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:16,720 Speaker 1: nervous about it, or I'm a fucking on the road. Never. 840 00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:19,320 Speaker 4: I always I like a couple two tequila sotas. That's 841 00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:20,360 Speaker 4: my nice spot, right. 842 00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:21,480 Speaker 2: For I won't say never. 843 00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:27,760 Speaker 1: I won't say never, but for stand up especially like I. 844 00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:28,080 Speaker 2: I don't know, I just want to be nervous. 845 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:29,400 Speaker 3: Yeah, I want to be nervous. 846 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:31,480 Speaker 2: That's kind of nerdy. I'm like the opposite of it. 847 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:34,760 Speaker 2: Like afterwards, I'm like looking for like I'm like, what's 848 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:39,440 Speaker 2: the air one equivalent in this town? I need organic vegetables. 849 00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:41,600 Speaker 2: And then I like take a shower and I'm in 850 00:33:41,640 --> 00:33:43,480 Speaker 2: bed by like nine thirty. 851 00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:46,120 Speaker 4: And I'm really sucked by some weird man that was 852 00:33:46,160 --> 00:33:52,160 Speaker 4: at my show. I'm not always like that. I'm discussing. Yeah, 853 00:33:52,880 --> 00:33:56,080 Speaker 4: my specialty. No, I'm looking. I'm girls. I gotta get 854 00:33:56,080 --> 00:34:01,080 Speaker 4: tested next week. I uh the nightmare, damn it. I 855 00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:02,640 Speaker 4: can test it all the time. I love getting tested 856 00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:05,480 Speaker 4: though it's my fairly to do. H F at Hollywood 857 00:34:05,520 --> 00:34:07,280 Speaker 4: Western Free Clinic. 858 00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:09,359 Speaker 2: Take my blood every five I'm in there. 859 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:12,760 Speaker 1: I'm risking so hype. I'm such a hypochondriacting the doctor 860 00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:13,600 Speaker 1: every fuck it. 861 00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:14,239 Speaker 2: Every other week. 862 00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:15,200 Speaker 4: I think I have aids every day. 863 00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:15,640 Speaker 2: So I have to. 864 00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:17,600 Speaker 4: I literally have to go back, and I'm not drinking. 865 00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:19,120 Speaker 4: I go in. I asked. That's when I asked the guy, 866 00:34:19,160 --> 00:34:21,239 Speaker 4: so we didn't use a condomns. I'm an idiot, but I. 867 00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:22,040 Speaker 2: Ask it is that. 868 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:26,080 Speaker 1: You're a hypoconject. It doesn't make any fucking sense. 869 00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:27,720 Speaker 4: I literally I ask every guy. I'm like, two aids 870 00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:29,560 Speaker 4: and I go, you know you legally at the time 871 00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:31,320 Speaker 4: of the truth, I don't know if that's real. I 872 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:33,800 Speaker 4: say it is, I say it is. I'm like, legally 873 00:34:33,840 --> 00:34:34,440 Speaker 4: you can be resident. 874 00:34:34,520 --> 00:34:34,799 Speaker 3: You know. 875 00:34:34,840 --> 00:34:35,440 Speaker 1: I think it is true. 876 00:34:35,480 --> 00:34:38,080 Speaker 4: I heard that once somewhere. I don't know. Anyways, I'm 877 00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:38,879 Speaker 4: gonna tested on Monday. 878 00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:39,279 Speaker 1: Do you want to go? 879 00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:44,400 Speaker 4: Should we go together? The clinic? I love going the 880 00:34:44,400 --> 00:34:46,600 Speaker 4: one over there, is fun though. Yeah, one woman that 881 00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,680 Speaker 4: takes my blood test. She's like, she's always so chipper. 882 00:34:49,960 --> 00:34:52,239 Speaker 4: She says, like, Okay, time for the pic one, two three. 883 00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:54,080 Speaker 4: I'm like, she tells me, I've aids, I'm not going 884 00:34:54,120 --> 00:34:55,799 Speaker 4: to be upset because she's actually like all pumped up 885 00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:56,200 Speaker 4: about it. 886 00:34:56,360 --> 00:34:57,160 Speaker 1: She's so pleasant. 887 00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:00,279 Speaker 4: I hope I have her on Monday, Cecilia think her 888 00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:01,959 Speaker 4: name is. I hope I have her. Thanks for coming, 889 00:35:02,040 --> 00:35:08,120 Speaker 4: Thanks for having me by, I'll be. 890 00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:11,640 Speaker 1: With aericdre Bombing with Eric Andre is brought to you 891 00:35:11,640 --> 00:35:14,480 Speaker 1: by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts. 892 00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:16,360 Speaker 2: Executive produced by. 893 00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:20,480 Speaker 1: Hans Sani and Olivia Aguilar, edited and sound designed by 894 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:23,920 Speaker 1: Andy Harris. Our artist by Dylan Vanderberg. And if you 895 00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:26,200 Speaker 1: want to confess to your own bombing moments or give 896 00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:28,239 Speaker 1: us a shout out, go rate us five stars and 897 00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:30,759 Speaker 1: drop a review on your podcast app of choice right 898 00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:32,960 Speaker 1: about your own stories of bombing at life. If you're 899 00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:35,600 Speaker 1: on Apple Podcasts, you can also subscribe to Big Money 900 00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:38,640 Speaker 1: Players Diamond to get exclusive bonus content with every episode, 901 00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:43,280 Speaker 1: and listen to all my episodes ad free. Bye