WEBVTT - Phone Tap: First Time First Class

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<v Speaker 1>It's Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning time for your

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<v Speaker 1>prank call. And today we speak to a guy who

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<v Speaker 1>just booked his very first international flight. Oh he he's

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<v Speaker 1>never been out of the country before, does not know

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<v Speaker 1>what to expect. Man, so exciting. Yeah, he's about to learn,

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<v Speaker 1>thanks to his wife who set him up for this,

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<v Speaker 1>that when you fly first class international, things are very different.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, he's going to ruin himself forever. He's

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<v Speaker 1>either gonna love it or really love it. In your

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<v Speaker 1>phone tap right now. Hello, good morning. Am I speaking

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<v Speaker 1>with a mister Jason.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Is he hi Jason.

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<v Speaker 1>My name is Freddy. I'm calling from Airlines Customer Service.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh sure, Hi, Hi, you're taking a flight with us

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<v Speaker 1>this Saturday, NonStop to London.

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<v Speaker 2>Hi. I am yet great.

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<v Speaker 1>Now it says you're flying first class, but you haven't

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<v Speaker 1>filled out any of the passenger preference selections off our.

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<v Speaker 2>App Oh I didn't know there were such things.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh you didn't.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no, I never flied internationally, so it's like it's

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<v Speaker 2>kind of my first time. Oh okay.

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<v Speaker 1>In that case, I'm just going to walk you through

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<v Speaker 1>this over the phone, if that's okay.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I got a couple of minutes.

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<v Speaker 1>Perfect, so I'll just dive right into it. Number one,

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<v Speaker 1>for your pre flight pill, would you prefer ambient zoloft

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<v Speaker 1>or something harder.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't really give up drugs on flights.

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<v Speaker 1>Only to our first class clientele. I mean, this is

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<v Speaker 1>an international first class flight, Sir. You spend a lot

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<v Speaker 1>of money.

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<v Speaker 2>I shouldn't know this was a thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh it is. I mean, if you wanted me to

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<v Speaker 1>slap you in the face, I would do it because

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<v Speaker 1>you are a first class customer and we value your business.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't need to be slapped in the face.

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<v Speaker 1>So no, no, you would slap me, I would take

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<v Speaker 1>the slapping. I guess I'm good when I think about it.

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<v Speaker 1>No one's ever asked me to slap them pre flight before,

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<v Speaker 1>but if they did, I would.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, no slapping, no drugs.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh okay, well great in that case, let's proceed as

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<v Speaker 1>it pertains to your in flight meal. Would you care

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<v Speaker 1>to have normal, kosher or shaman blessed?

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<v Speaker 2>What's shaman blessed?

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<v Speaker 1>We have a spiritual guide from Northeast Asia bless certain meals.

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<v Speaker 1>Before they enter the plane. He is in a transcendent state,

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<v Speaker 1>aligning his chakras to Mother Earth to give you the

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<v Speaker 1>most perfectly balanced meal.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, what the heck? It is my first international flight,

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<v Speaker 2>right sure, Shaman blessed?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay? Perfect with that selection. There is a chance he

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<v Speaker 1>may eat some of your meal.

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<v Speaker 2>He's going to eat some of the meal.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe if he's hungry, but it doesn't take the blessing away.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. No, I don't want my meal to be like.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh eaten Okay, Well, how plebeian of you. A lot

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<v Speaker 1>of our first class passengers say that, but I'll mark

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<v Speaker 1>you down normal.

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<v Speaker 2>Is this some type of jokes? I've never heard of

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<v Speaker 2>anything like this, Like a lot of your first class

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<v Speaker 2>options are like kind of out there.

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<v Speaker 1>You're the one who's never been on an international flight before.

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<v Speaker 2>That's what you've told me, right, But I'm like an

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<v Speaker 2>educated adult. I think I would have heard of this.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, sir, we try not to advertise this to all

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<v Speaker 1>the normies and economy, you understand. So anyway, back to

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<v Speaker 1>your preferences, would you prefer normal toilet seat, heated toilet seat,

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<v Speaker 1>or shaman blessed.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't even know what to say to that.

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<v Speaker 1>Honestly, I don't know a lot about the spirituality behind it.

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<v Speaker 1>But from my understanding, that's where he blesses the meals.

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<v Speaker 1>What So it's like a it's a two for one blessing, So.

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<v Speaker 2>He blesses the meal and the toilet.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, while he's on it, Like, why why are you

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<v Speaker 1>offering this, sir? Like I've said, it's an international flight,

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<v Speaker 1>so legally we can't do any of these things until

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<v Speaker 1>we're over nomadic airspace where certain American laws don't apply.

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<v Speaker 2>This is this is just weird and not. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>I don't want to do anything shaman blessed or I

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<v Speaker 2>don't want my food near the toilet. I don't want

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<v Speaker 2>to do that.

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<v Speaker 1>No, did note. I'm gonna put that down for you,

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<v Speaker 1>and uh almost done here. We need to discuss your

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<v Speaker 1>in flight entertainment again.

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<v Speaker 2>Nothing shaman blessed.

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<v Speaker 1>No, of course, there's no shaman involved in the entertainment.

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<v Speaker 1>That's kind of a ridiculous question on your part.

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<v Speaker 2>It's really not, because you've offered it with every other thing, sir.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm running short on time here, so if I could

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<v Speaker 1>just ask you the question, would you prefer regular movies

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<v Speaker 1>adult content only or super adult content?

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<v Speaker 2>What the hell is super adult? Oh?

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<v Speaker 1>So you're interested?

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<v Speaker 2>No, I just never heard of that.

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<v Speaker 1>I just know you must have headphones for the super

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<v Speaker 1>adult content and earmuffs covering the headphones because it gets

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<v Speaker 1>pretty loud.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you not understand that my wife is on the

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<v Speaker 2>flight with me. This is like an anniversary Oh.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so maybe more of an adult plus experience. What

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<v Speaker 1>when you share headphones, which unfortunately are shaman blessed.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay you said that wasn't involved in this. There's no

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<v Speaker 2>more shaman blessed thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Not with the entertainment, but with the headphones.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes. Oh and what he blessed them on the toilet?

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<v Speaker 1>Well that I can't speak to, but I do know

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<v Speaker 1>the shaman bless This prank phone call that we're doing

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<v Speaker 1>on the radio right now, well set up by your

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<v Speaker 1>wife of course, because she listens to our radio show.

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<v Speaker 1>What you picking up on this? Because my name is

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<v Speaker 1>jeff oh yea oh man, god, yeah, man, I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>from the airline. I'm from brook and Jeffrey. In the morning,

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<v Speaker 1>your wife wanted us to do a phone tap on you.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh.

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<v Speaker 1>She told us that you've never traveled international before. And

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even get to tell you that as a

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<v Speaker 1>first class passenger, you get to fly the plane for

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<v Speaker 1>ten whole minutes. Oh my god, how cool is that.

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<v Speaker 2>As long as it's the Shannon Meals, I'm really looking

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<v Speaker 2>forward to it. The Weeke Up every morning was phone

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<v Speaker 2>taps weekday mornings on the twenties, Brook and Jeffrey in

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<v Speaker 2>the morning.