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Speaker 1: Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. Danny's

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Speaker 1: Listening is a bonus series brought to you by Family Secrets.

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Speaker 1: I have a last name that I was given at

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Speaker 1: birth because it's my father's last name, and it was

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Speaker 1: my grandfather's last name and my father's family's last name.

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Speaker 1: So when I went to college, a professor pointed out

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Speaker 1: to me that it was a famous last name that

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Speaker 1: belonged to the barrister in the US that created the warrant.

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Speaker 1: So I continued with my last name into my marriage,

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Speaker 1: did not take my married name either, and had a

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Speaker 1: couple of graduate degrees unbeknownst to me. When my grandfather

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Speaker 1: died in I learned he had adopted my father and

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Speaker 1: he was not my biological grandfather, And then things began

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Speaker 1: to make sense because he didn't act like it. We

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Speaker 1: were left out of that inheritance because we were not

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Speaker 1: biologically related. My father passed away a few years ago,

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Speaker 1: and I never heard or knew anything about his father,

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Speaker 1: being told that he had disappeared in the Merchant Marine,

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Speaker 1: that my father was a baby, and never knew his dad.

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Speaker 1: After I did ancestry, DNA at cousin reached out to

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Speaker 1: me this summer through the Internet who found me as

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Speaker 1: a match and decided to help me discover this grandfather

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Speaker 1: that I had a name to but did not knew

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Speaker 1: anything about that family. He discovered he died differently than

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Speaker 1: we expected, and that he had called in three days

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Speaker 1: after his wife died to a West Coast newspaper to

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Speaker 1: say he had shot his wife, and three days later

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Speaker 1: after he made that phone call, he shot himself. But

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Speaker 1: it's a shot to me, and I doubt my father

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Speaker 1: ever knew would happen to his real dad. He did

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Speaker 1: well in his life, but there is this legacy that

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Speaker 1: was never shared and now maybe I know why, or

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Speaker 1: we just never wanted to know why. Hi, it's Danny.

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Speaker 1: Thanks so much for taking the time to share your

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Speaker 1: story with us. It sent chills down my spine because

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Speaker 1: I'm putting together season six of Family Secrets, which will

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Speaker 1: drop on December ninth. By the way, and one of

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Speaker 1: the episodes is literally called name of the Father. So

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Speaker 1: you were given a last name at birth that meant

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Speaker 1: something to you as you grew up, a famous last name,

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Speaker 1: one you felt connected to and proud of. I totally

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Speaker 1: relate to that. I felt the same way about the

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Speaker 1: Shapiro family. They were illustrious, prosperous, admired. It was a

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Speaker 1: legacy I attached myself to. I didn't take my husband's

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Speaker 1: name either when I married, and all of my books

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Speaker 1: are published under that name, Danny Shapiro. To discover well

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Speaker 1: into a life that the name on your birth certificate

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Speaker 1: is not the same as the family name you come

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Speaker 1: from biologically is a wild blow, and it's one that's

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Speaker 1: hard for many people to wrap their heads around. It's

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Speaker 1: the discovery of it that is I think the biggest

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Speaker 1: shock and heartache. Believing one thing and discovering another at

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Speaker 1: such a fundamental level. It's heartbreaking that your father was

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Speaker 1: left out of his inheritance because he had been adopted.

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Speaker 1: That blow, on top of the blow of the discovery,

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Speaker 1: must have been extremely painful for him. For all of you,

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Speaker 1: and now you're left, thanks to the wonders of DNA discovery,

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Speaker 1: holding all this new information about your biological genetic heritage.

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Speaker 1: Your dad is gone. You're pretty sure that he never

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Speaker 1: knew what happened to his biological dad, who lived a

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Speaker 1: life that contrasts sharply with the life he had known.

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Speaker 1: I have a few more thoughts First, that cousin who

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Speaker 1: reached out on ancestry dot Com sounds like a really

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Speaker 1: good and kind person, one of those angels we meet

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Speaker 1: along the way when we're on the rocky path of

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Speaker 1: such an unexpected discovery. Secondly, you say your dad did well,

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Speaker 1: he had a successful life. This to me feels key.

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Speaker 1: Your dad gave you that name. No, perhaps it wasn't

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Speaker 1: his genetic family name, but he lived most of his

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Speaker 1: life with that name, and you've lived all of your

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Speaker 1: life with yours. I've come to think of these complex

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Speaker 1: stories like yours, like mine, as threads in a tapestry.

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Speaker 1: All these threads woven together is what made your dad

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Speaker 1: your dad, and what makes you you. I wonder if

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Speaker 1: you can embrace your dad's family name, the one he

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Speaker 1: lived and died with. That's as true as anything else.

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Speaker 1: And I wonder too, if you might find some small, private,

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Speaker 1: deeply personal way to acknowledge that other thread that has

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Speaker 1: woven into what makes you you. I wish you the

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Speaker 1: best of luck on your ongoing journey. I'll be thinking

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Speaker 1: of you. If you have a family secret story you'd

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Speaker 1: like to share on Danny's Listening, please call eight eight

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Speaker 1: eight Secret zero. That's eight s e c R e

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Speaker 1: T in the number zero,