Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear.
Speaker 2: But you're a guest in my home.
Speaker 1: You gotta come to me empty, and I said, no, guests,
Speaker 1: your presences presence enough.
Speaker 3: And I already had too much stuff, So how do
Speaker 3: you dare.
Speaker 4: To surbey me?
Speaker 2: Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. We're
Speaker 2: here in the backyard. I'm starting to I'm really going
Speaker 2: to assume at this point that my co host will
Speaker 2: not be showing up. And that's fine. I'm in control.
Speaker 2: We're having an incredible time on the podcast already. If
Speaker 2: I hear a peep out of you, I'm gonna freak out.
Speaker 2: I'll shut down the podcast. So just be quiet. Let's
Speaker 2: get into it. I love today's guest. I really love him.
Speaker 2: It's Patrick McDonald, Hi Bridge, Eric Patrick. Welcome to.
Speaker 4: I said, no, thank you for having me. I'm thrilled.
Speaker 2: What's the most traumatic thing that's ever happened to you?
Speaker 4: The most traumatic thing?
Speaker 2: Don't answer that. I just like the idea of starting
Speaker 2: a podcast on that note, just.
Speaker 4: So let's go there.
Speaker 5: I feel like that is so many people's real way
Speaker 5: to start podcasts and interviews.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I can't imagine.
Speaker 5: I know, and I think that the guest response too
Speaker 5: is to dump and then to just feel empty for
Speaker 5: the rest of the and then you then you get
Speaker 5: into the frivolous. I think that's maybe a fun way
Speaker 5: to go.
Speaker 2: Would I would freeze up and I would probably just
Speaker 2: walk out. Yeah, I don't think that I'm capable. You
Speaker 2: would have to have me on the podcast for five hours,
Speaker 2: like in a sauna before you approach me with that question.
Speaker 5: The most dramatic thing I I, uh, this is a
Speaker 5: little traumatic. But I one time was dating somebody and
Speaker 5: that person said, let's tell each other the worst things
Speaker 5: we've ever done, genuinely, and.
Speaker 4: Was like, let's And I said, I.
Speaker 2: Know how far into the relationship this was three or
Speaker 2: four weeks. Oh no, that's simply not the time. That
Speaker 2: person is undercover. They are looking looking for information. There
Speaker 2: is terrible person. They're very bad at their.
Speaker 4: Job, terrible spy.
Speaker 5: That person thought that I was involved with the KGV
Speaker 5: or something truly, but it was a really and I
Speaker 5: literally said, no, I'm not.
Speaker 4: Going to do that.
Speaker 2: And then did they do theirs?
Speaker 5: They didn't know and I'm not interested. But now knowing
Speaker 5: we obviously are no longer together. Knowing that, I'm sure
Speaker 5: it wasn't something great, you know.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, So you do think it could have been
Speaker 2: a really bad thing.
Speaker 5: It could have been bad, and I think this person
Speaker 5: maybe had some filter issues. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Wow, it's a fascinating thing.
Speaker 5: I mean, I think I think trauma bonding is such
Speaker 5: a big way people start relationships.
Speaker 2: Now, well, I mean it's I think it's really a
Speaker 2: psychopath move. I really do think it is. It's like,
Speaker 2: I think it's part of the psychopath toolbox where you
Speaker 2: just immediately start sharing too much information to open up
Speaker 2: the other person. Yes, because they're like I guess I
Speaker 2: got to give, and then they're in control. They're in
Speaker 2: control the situation.
Speaker 4: And you're indebted to them because they have the secrets.
Speaker 2: Exactly. I gave somebody a ride home once, and this
Speaker 2: person did that and got so much information out of me.
Speaker 2: And this was before I knew it was part of
Speaker 2: the toolbox. Okay, but now that person's out there with
Speaker 2: so much information on me and let's be honest, some
Speaker 2: of my friends. But it's a very effective tool.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Ferson just has them at the ready.
Speaker 5: Yes, So that's why I make sure that all the
Speaker 5: stuff that I say is so purposefully bad and it
Speaker 5: ain't and stupid, so if it comes out, it's like okay, like.
Speaker 4: Cool, whatever, Fine, why are you telling me this news?
Speaker 4: I used to have that theory.
Speaker 5: Actually, I used to say was when I was younger,
Speaker 5: and this is maybe a junior psychopath move, but I
Speaker 5: would I would say, you know, if I talk shit
Speaker 5: about somebody else, I'd say something that was so rough
Speaker 5: that if you told that to that person's face, you
Speaker 5: would feel bad, trying to guard that from being spread
Speaker 5: by being so bad.
Speaker 4: And guess what that didn't work? Wow?
Speaker 2: Well yeah, people love that.
Speaker 4: Are you kidding me?
Speaker 2: You give me any information? I don't care how devastating
Speaker 2: it is. I'm you know, the texts are beginning as
Speaker 2: soon as I see that after I've left the information source.
Speaker 2: Let's get the news out there exactly. Let's start spreading it.
Speaker 4: Start spreading it, New York style, New York, New York style.
Speaker 2: I love a little bit of gossip. I love a
Speaker 2: little you know, just a little something something about people.
Speaker 2: It's tasty, It's very tasty. Now it's taste. A piece
Speaker 2: of information about you is I got a text about
Speaker 2: twenty minutes ago that you were going to be late
Speaker 2: to the podcast.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you want to explain why. Yeah, and it's not
Speaker 2: a professional reason. It doesn't reflect well on you.
Speaker 5: I haven't told You've already reached out to my team,
Speaker 5: my managers.
Speaker 2: I've screamed at both of them, good luck to the
Speaker 2: rest of their roster. I'm getting on this podcast. Yeah.
Speaker 5: I blacklisted everybody else, all the custodians and mechanics that
Speaker 5: they read.
Speaker 4: I think. Okay, So here's the thing.
Speaker 5: I am late because I was buying a twelve foot
Speaker 5: skeleton from home Depot.
Speaker 4: I have been looking for the skeleton for three years.
Speaker 5: I found when in Pasadena today, about thirty minutes away
Speaker 5: from me.
Speaker 4: I drove to Pasadena to buy it.
Speaker 5: I had another obligation, which is why we pushed this
Speaker 5: for thirty minutes, and I got out early, so I said,
Speaker 5: in my free time, I'll go pick up the skeleton.
Speaker 4: The skeleton did not fit in my car. I had
Speaker 4: dads helping me. I was falling.
Speaker 5: I have dirt all over my black pants right now.
Speaker 5: I was falling all over the Home Depot parking lote.
Speaker 5: Different people were helping me. One dad was like, what
Speaker 5: is this is this? Uh, why is this so big?
Speaker 5: I was like, Oh, it's that one of those skeletons.
Speaker 5: He goes, oh you got kids. I didn't respond, not true,
Speaker 5: simply not very far from simply not true. But I
Speaker 5: was just laurel and hardying it all over the place
Speaker 5: with this this freaking skeleton.
Speaker 4: I was pushing it.
Speaker 5: I've broken parts in my car, rubbed the rubber off
Speaker 5: the sides of the car, and it's open right now,
Speaker 5: it's tied together with twine.
Speaker 2: You had to back into my drive I'm back.
Speaker 5: In your driveway because I'm scared my skeleton's gonna get
Speaker 5: stolen during this Is that?
Speaker 2: Why?
Speaker 4: Very heavy? It's eighty five pounds.
Speaker 2: Eighty five for twelve foot Yeah, sure, she's looking great,
Speaker 2: She's looking really good. Twelve pounds. I finally reached my goalway.
Speaker 5: Finally wait, goal heights, I think. But the thing is,
Speaker 5: it's it's this skeleton. I don't even know if I
Speaker 5: want it anymore. But I started about two years ago
Speaker 5: actively trying. There are our Facebook groups, there are alerts.
Speaker 5: They re leased small amounts of this skeleton every now
Speaker 5: and then, and right now it's in season, right and
Speaker 5: I finally found one, and I had to get it,
Speaker 5: even though they're super scarce.
Speaker 4: It's the home Depot skeleton.
Speaker 5: It's a massive deal and once people put it up,
Speaker 5: you usually leave it up all year and you can
Speaker 5: buy other outfits for it. You can buy Santa Claus
Speaker 5: outfits for it. The guy that I bought it from
Speaker 5: just told me that he had a friend that dresses
Speaker 5: it up like Cupid for Valentine's Day.
Speaker 2: Do you know who would love this? Oh, Turtle Creek Layton.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: How is she doing her like Valentine's Skeleton and this
Speaker 2: sort of thing?
Speaker 4: Do you think she's been involved?
Speaker 2: I wonder if she's after one and she can't get
Speaker 2: her hands.
Speaker 5: I wonder she's going to get an exclusive partnership where
Speaker 5: she's going to become the skeleton.
Speaker 4: You can get a total exclusive skeleton. You can have
Speaker 4: her in your yard.
Speaker 2: For listeners who are not aware of this, is a
Speaker 2: someone who occasionally pops up on the podcast. She's from Dallas.
Speaker 2: She's more of a she's living it up in a
Speaker 2: way that should be illegal, just having the time of
Speaker 2: her life, decorating her home constantly.
Speaker 4: It's yards away from where George Bush lives.
Speaker 5: I believe it I think she lives in like Preston
Speaker 5: Hollow area because I've looked at her up before.
Speaker 2: Wow, junior or wait junior Junior. Yeah, I think it
Speaker 2: would be. At this point, I'm.
Speaker 5: Not describing George Bush's grave.
Speaker 2: That's why it's part of her training to become these
Speaker 2: giants exactly. Yeah, I'm moving in next to a grave.
Speaker 4: But yeah, who knows. I mean, you've you've seen my house.
Speaker 2: I live in a guest house, right, so you've the
Speaker 2: house that you live at has a big backyard, yeah,
Speaker 2: that you kind of can claim as your own. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and so you've got plenty of room. I have room.
Speaker 5: I haven't cleared it with like the person who owns
Speaker 5: the front house that I'm gonna have a twelve foot
Speaker 5: skeleton back.
Speaker 2: Then, I wonder how she'll feel.
Speaker 5: I think she'll be okay with it. If she isn't,
Speaker 5: then we can have a discussion. But it's not going
Speaker 5: anywhere she could move it. Look, it's already happened. I've
Speaker 5: already wrecked my car. It's already the blue book value
Speaker 5: has gone down because of this skeleton.
Speaker 2: Tell me how much one of these skeletons costs.
Speaker 4: So that I'm gonna be honest with the skeleton is
Speaker 4: three hundred dollars.
Speaker 5: Oh my god, Yeah, yeah, it's But the thing is
Speaker 5: in the retail world, they have been spiking this up
Speaker 5: and so you can buy it online for about nine hundred.
Speaker 4: To one thousand lectures item.
Speaker 5: It's a collector's item. So if you buy it on
Speaker 5: the market retail, that is the steel. Otherwise I have
Speaker 5: been very close to buying like a seven hundred and
Speaker 5: fifty dollars skeleton. This is the wrong priorities, and I
Speaker 5: fully understand that.
Speaker 4: I think there have to be some of.
Speaker 5: Your listeners who are a twelve foot skeleton crew, and
Speaker 5: I like for you to rise up and defend me.
Speaker 4: It's just very difficult.
Speaker 5: I'm very proud, but I'm telling you I was on
Speaker 5: the ground.
Speaker 4: I fell on the ground trying to push it in.
Speaker 2: Does it fit onto? Like, it's not in a shopping cart? Obviously,
Speaker 2: it's one of those.
Speaker 4: Flat bed the kind of dolly, the.
Speaker 2: Thing I was throwing sandbags on earlier this year in
Speaker 2: a panic.
Speaker 4: Exactly.
Speaker 2: Yeah, during the snuffs during the floods, classic flooding situation.
Speaker 2: So but you push it out into the parking lot, Yeah,
Speaker 2: did you do self check out.
Speaker 5: By the way, I did, uh customer service, I did
Speaker 5: like internet purchase.
Speaker 4: Oh wow, I reserved it.
Speaker 2: You had to.
Speaker 5: There were only six left when I got it. Wow, which,
Speaker 5: to be honest, is a lot. And I actually spiraled
Speaker 5: because I said, oh, is it in demand?
Speaker 4: Now? Does that mean it's sound as cool? Oh? And
Speaker 4: thought about it. I was like, oh, is everyone going
Speaker 4: to have one?
Speaker 5: So now I'm just gonna everyone's gonna be putting their
Speaker 5: skeletons of the same day.
Speaker 2: I'm shocked there aren't more. I mean, it's just plastic, right.
Speaker 4: I think there's some metal rods.
Speaker 2: It's a whalebone.
Speaker 5: It's whalebone alone, very human bone.
Speaker 2: This thing is created by poachers.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and it has it has eyes that light up
Speaker 4: the mound.
Speaker 2: They move around. I've never seen I don't think I've
Speaker 2: ever seen one in person, or I guess on foot.
Speaker 2: Maybe I've driven pass or ye, driven past one that's
Speaker 2: not on foot.
Speaker 4: Well, that's why they're sparse.
Speaker 5: I do think I'm gonna put it in the little
Speaker 5: wooded area because there's a fence on the other side
Speaker 5: of the fence.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna put it. Maybe leaning over the fence.
Speaker 2: May I suggest, Yeah, what do you think the gazebo.
Speaker 5: Oh, it's kind of an old, overgrown gazebo in the corner.
Speaker 4: That feels like a good idea.
Speaker 2: Can it sit down?
Speaker 4: I think it can.
Speaker 2: To have that thing with its arm kind of casually
Speaker 2: sitting out of the gazebo. There's I'll tell you what.
Speaker 2: No matter how many of those events sold, none of
Speaker 2: them is currently in a gazebo.
Speaker 4: That's correct.
Speaker 2: I mean you're missing out. I mean can you fit
Speaker 2: it through the gazebo door? That's the big question.
Speaker 4: I think, so, I think I have to build it
Speaker 4: inside the gazebo.
Speaker 5: The gazebo has gone a little crazy, Like there's a
Speaker 5: gazebo on my property and it's gotten really overgrown.
Speaker 2: What's happening in there?
Speaker 4: There's just a lot of.
Speaker 5: Weeds growing up around there. It's it's it's getting a
Speaker 5: little shody over there. It's getting kind of kind of wild.
Speaker 2: Are there any animals currently in there?
Speaker 5: No, not in the gazebo. But I did see a
Speaker 5: gray fox in my idea to day you.
Speaker 2: Saw a fox?
Speaker 4: Fox?
Speaker 2: Is a gray fox? Actually gray? Or is that just
Speaker 2: the name?
Speaker 4: Yes? Gray on the jacket like on the on the
Speaker 4: on the shoulders, and.
Speaker 2: That little orange everywhere else.
Speaker 4: I think so on the on the head, there's a
Speaker 4: little bit of a.
Speaker 2: Grit, so it's like a silver fox, like a silver fox,
Speaker 2: kind of a daddy fox, daddy fox.
Speaker 4: There's a daddy fox in my arm. He wants to
Speaker 4: take me to Balm Spring.
Speaker 2: I'm not leaving. I'll help you put up the skeleton,
Speaker 2: whatever it takes. Just go a weekend, overnight.
Speaker 5: Please please, he's only shaking one of those martini shakers.
Speaker 4: It's too much.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm very excited for you. I'll have to come
Speaker 2: by and see the skeleton at some point. Yes, you
Speaker 2: would love to stand next to it and just like
Speaker 2: to feel what it feels like next to a twelve
Speaker 2: foot being.
Speaker 5: I know I'm thinking about that too, because I'm six
Speaker 5: foot two, which is twice my size, and I can't
Speaker 5: kind of grasp how big twelve.
Speaker 4: Feet is, right, which makes you feel so stupid. I
Speaker 4: feel like I should twelve feet.
Speaker 2: I mean yeah, I feel like even when you meet
Speaker 2: someone who's seven feet tall, there's no preparing you for
Speaker 2: that feeling where it's just like, no, this is not
Speaker 2: something I see.
Speaker 4: No.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I'm I definitely have tall privilege, right, and
Speaker 5: because I'm a little taller, so when I meet someone
Speaker 5: that's like six five or six six, that is jarring.
Speaker 5: And I'm even to you, even to me, and then
Speaker 5: I get to look up. But something that I don't
Speaker 5: think tall people talk about a lot. What's difficult is
Speaker 5: everyone that looks up at me is getting kind of
Speaker 5: my my chin.
Speaker 2: Worst angle, you know, the time, all the time, they're
Speaker 2: getting what you should not do for a self.
Speaker 5: Exactly, You're getting the worst angle. Like as a photographer,
Speaker 5: people would say, we got to move, but you're getting
Speaker 5: it all the time. You're getting my chin, You're getting
Speaker 5: my little double chin, You're getting my little bubble down there,
Speaker 5: you know, And it's frustrating.
Speaker 2: Bubble. There's no bubble, I mean, and if you have
Speaker 2: a bubble yourself, that's fine, but I'm just gonna say,
Speaker 2: there's no bubble. There's not like a bullfrog bubble.
Speaker 4: Sometimes it feels like that. Sometimes feels like a bit
Speaker 4: of a bullfrog.
Speaker 2: I've never thought about that. That's very Meanwhile, everybody's getting
Speaker 2: but you also don't want to shoot down.
Speaker 4: You don't want to shoot down. I also in on
Speaker 4: zooms and stuff.
Speaker 5: I am told that when I meet somebody on zoom
Speaker 5: and then I meet them in person, I look shorter
Speaker 5: on zoom and they think I'm a short person.
Speaker 4: And then we meet and they go, oh, you're really tall.
Speaker 4: You look short on zoom.
Speaker 2: I was just talking to somebody that was telling me
Speaker 2: they thought I was tall. And it's absolutely the first
Speaker 2: time in history that anyone has even thought about that
Speaker 2: in regards to me.
Speaker 4: I can't see you being tall, I will say.
Speaker 2: That you could see me being a tall energy.
Speaker 4: I can.
Speaker 5: But but here's what I'm going to say. And I
Speaker 5: don't want to take I don't want you to take
Speaker 5: offense to this. I think if you were tall, you
Speaker 5: would be gaunt.
Speaker 2: I think that that would be Yeah, this complexion should
Speaker 2: not be tall.
Speaker 5: I think it would be a little haunted manship it
Speaker 5: becomes scary, it becomes looming constantly coming out of the shadows. Yes, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: I think so, I think so, And so I think
Speaker 5: I think your height suits.
Speaker 4: You very well.
Speaker 2: Right, it's good to hear.
Speaker 4: And the word is in you don't have to worry
Speaker 4: about the city wore.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that doesn't.
Speaker 5: And I don't want to take offense and I don't
Speaker 5: want any of your listeners to, you know, to come
Speaker 5: after you, come after me. I've already already come out
Speaker 5: after him trauma to talk about my skeleton. And then
Speaker 5: I'm called you, Garne. This is not the way I
Speaker 5: wanted to introduce myself.
Speaker 2: This is not how you should have entered the world stage.
Speaker 2: And this is the world stage.
Speaker 4: The world stage.
Speaker 2: This is sort of you know, we're talking uns level.
Speaker 2: Every nation hearing your voice right now.
Speaker 5: Wow, everyone has those little translators, the translator. I love
Speaker 5: those little translators.
Speaker 2: I love watching the translator during a U N or whatever.
Speaker 2: It's fascinating things. I just heard a loud scream rest
Speaker 2: in peace.
Speaker 4: This is a spooky episode.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think we're octoberish, aren't we? On a
Speaker 2: least octoberish?
Speaker 4: A lot of.
Speaker 5: Spooky season came early this year, and and and October
Speaker 5: stuff like pumpkin spice came like September first this year.
Speaker 2: Interesting. Yeah, I feel like everyone's ready for spooky season
Speaker 2: as soon as possible.
Speaker 4: Think we needed a treat and we needed a distraction.
Speaker 2: Right and August went by in a flash. Yeah, we
Speaker 2: loved how quickly August. Everyone agrees it went by in
Speaker 2: a flash. Absolutely, yeah, yeah, yeah, And then of course
Speaker 2: we get into these fall flavors, and in Los Angeles
Speaker 2: none of it makes any sense, which is fine where
Speaker 2: we deal with that, but I imagine in other climates
Speaker 2: September first, the school bell is ringing, whatever other things
Speaker 2: happen in the fall are happening start to click in
Speaker 2: for people, so it makes sense. Yeah, they're warming up
Speaker 2: with their little warm drink.
Speaker 4: They're doing something, they need something to be warm about.
Speaker 2: And meanwhile the rest of us are like, we're going
Speaker 2: to have a blackout because everyone's air conditioning is on
Speaker 2: at full speed, and how will I make it through
Speaker 2: the night exactly, And that's the next six weeks for us. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's it up until basically Thanksgiving. Probably October is so
Speaker 2: hot in La Hot Hot. I saw someone in La
Speaker 2: recently say goodbye summer and say, no, no, you're performing.
Speaker 2: That's a performance. Summer's not over, just beginning.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Where were they saying it? Just like they were?
Speaker 2: They were someone on Instagram just like so maybe they
Speaker 2: were on the world stage. They have their own little platform.
Speaker 5: Goodbye summer shouting into a tree.
Speaker 2: Obviously, everything you've done until right now has been a
Speaker 2: massive distraction trying to get my uh my head off
Speaker 2: of what's really happening on the podcast. The podcast is
Speaker 2: called I said no gifts. Patrick, You and I have
Speaker 2: known each other for a long time, probably probably over
Speaker 2: a decade at this point.
Speaker 4: It has been over a decade, maybe twelve years.
Speaker 2: Should we sit here and try to figure it out
Speaker 2: for the listener, get down to brass.
Speaker 4: Tests, get down to brass tax I think it might
Speaker 4: have been. I think it's eleven years. Eleven eleven years,
Speaker 4: like this month.
Speaker 2: Okay, speak, I'm thinking, okay, So it's been a long time.
Speaker 2: I have until this point been like, I trust Patrick.
Speaker 2: I'll tell other people about him. Great guy, nothing to
Speaker 2: worry about podcasts. As I said seconds ago, I said
Speaker 2: no gifts. So we had the whole kerfuffle with your
Speaker 2: skeleton that was a nightmare for me. Then you were
Speaker 2: asking to pack into my driveway, separate nightmare for me.
Speaker 2: And now here we are, we're just going to approach
Speaker 2: the third nightmare, which is you obviously brought a gift
Speaker 2: in a bag, a nondescript bag with no other details. Yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 2: obviously a gift for me. What's going on?
Speaker 5: Well, I to be honest, would feel like a fool,
Speaker 5: empty handed, and I thought it would be nice to
Speaker 5: bring you this thing, and to be honest, these are
Speaker 5: these are several things in here, and they're atle handcrafted helpful,
Speaker 5: and I made them myself interesting and I got into
Speaker 5: quite a tear making these things. And so I don't
Speaker 5: want to say that it is fully selfless.
Speaker 4: I don't think. I do think these would be really helpful.
Speaker 5: For you in general to have, But I also think
Speaker 5: that I guess maybe there's a little bit of show off,
Speaker 5: maybe being like this is a skill that.
Speaker 4: I now have.
Speaker 2: A little braggadocia, a.
Speaker 5: Little bregadocia, a little a little you know, I love
Speaker 5: a personalized gifts. That's the way I worked really hard
Speaker 5: at making something that or giving something that feels like
Speaker 5: it really.
Speaker 4: Came from me, not that I picked it from a store.
Speaker 2: And then if the gift is bad, the person still
Speaker 2: can't say.
Speaker 4: Anything exactly and they can't return it.
Speaker 2: They can't return.
Speaker 4: Because it has no value.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, okay, well should I open it here on
Speaker 2: the podcast?
Speaker 4: You can't open it? Please do?
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna pull there's a thin item, going to
Speaker 2: guess which every one of these is. But this feels
Speaker 2: it's probably a trading card thickness and but a little
Speaker 2: bent on the edge, so it almost feels like it's
Speaker 2: broken off of the sight of a car or something.
Speaker 2: Let's see what's happening.
Speaker 6: Oh okay, So it's a little I would say, almost
Speaker 6: a decoration, like something you could place on a shelf
Speaker 6: or above the toilet.
Speaker 2: Tour hang from your rear view mirror. It's clear, like
Speaker 2: a what is this? It's not translucent? Thank you? And
Speaker 2: you've colored it in with some yellow and blue and greens,
Speaker 2: and it says why is drama so delicious?
Speaker 5: So let me tell you what the theme is right away.
Speaker 5: I've gotten into shrinky dinks recently.
Speaker 2: Wait, what is this?
Speaker 4: Do you don't know what shrinky inks are?
Speaker 2: I have no idea.
Speaker 4: Kids do them draw on.
Speaker 5: Like basically paper with watercolored pencil and you put them
Speaker 5: in the oven and it shrinks them down.
Speaker 4: Oh so I made a lot.
Speaker 5: Of shrink eating art for you today, some of it
Speaker 5: relating to the podcast, some of it relating to you.
Speaker 5: I thought why is drama so Delicious? Would be a
Speaker 5: fun phrase. I also want to reiterate. Unfortunately, when you
Speaker 5: make shrinkat ink art. You have to write everything backwards,
Speaker 5: so a lot of that is I did the question
Speaker 5: mark backwards, the age backwards accidentally. I tried my hardest.
Speaker 5: Everything I spelled. You have to remember I wrote backwards.
Speaker 2: For the most part. You did an excellent job. I
Speaker 2: would have never guessed it was close. And the initial
Speaker 2: H is backwards, but you're so into reading the other
Speaker 2: words you forget it.
Speaker 4: It's drama, so big.
Speaker 2: Drama is huge. Delicious is in cursive absolutely okay. So
Speaker 2: shrinky dink shrinky dinks? Do you buy like a kit?
Speaker 4: You buy a kit?
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I buy a kit and it comes with
Speaker 5: giant lamonade piece of paper, okay. And then you have
Speaker 5: watercolor pencils and you give stencils right, and you can
Speaker 5: free hand or you can do something else.
Speaker 2: Then you preheat the oven to what temperare three twenty
Speaker 2: five and then you just place it like on the
Speaker 2: on a cookie sheet. I want a cookie sheet for
Speaker 2: not ruining ovens.
Speaker 5: No, no, no, not ruining ovens for like one to
Speaker 5: five minutes fast, and you watch them shrink really fast.
Speaker 2: How big are they?
Speaker 4: Initially they're like a regular sheet of paper, like eight
Speaker 4: and a half by eleven, or however that.
Speaker 2: This was eight and a half by eleven and.
Speaker 4: That was big, and now it's the quarter of the size.
Speaker 2: Yeah, listener, if you're as ignorant as I am, the
Speaker 2: shrinky dink is very small at this point. Yes, it's
Speaker 2: probably the size of a mirror you would pull from
Speaker 2: your purse.
Speaker 5: Yes it is. It's basically a purse mirror. Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 5: and I think everyone knows that measurement.
Speaker 2: Carry that in my purse.
Speaker 4: Your mirrors full of persons.
Speaker 2: I'm just rooting through my bag pulling that out in
Speaker 2: front of a cashier. Where's my wallet?
Speaker 4: Oh there, I am, there's the money.
Speaker 2: Okay, So I love this. Why is drama so delicious?
Speaker 4: What do you think?
Speaker 2: I for me? Why is drama so delicious? It's because
Speaker 2: my life is so unbelievably dull. I love when somebody
Speaker 2: brings a man into my situation that I get to
Speaker 2: observe from afar.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I feel like we've both brought drama into each other's
Speaker 2: lives that somebody else's and it's always a great feeling. Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we've we've had some lunches together where we sit
Speaker 5: down and we we we eat as much food as
Speaker 5: we eat drama.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it feels very nice. And it's a release. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it is a release, and it's uh, you know, that's
Speaker 2: why I read tabloids exactly. Okay, let me get back
Speaker 2: into the book.
Speaker 4: Okay. What I think you should maybe do is pour
Speaker 4: all of those out onto you think sort of base.
Speaker 4: Well you can or you can put on.
Speaker 2: I found a very small one. Okay, let's see what
Speaker 2: this was one? Oh, very cute. It's a little pig.
Speaker 5: In a one piece and that's a stencil kind of
Speaker 5: a unitar Yeah, that's a pig at a one piece.
Speaker 5: So that's for you. And and again handmade. That's the
Speaker 5: stens of the stencil.
Speaker 4: Was there?
Speaker 2: But it pink and green?
Speaker 4: Yeah, the color of pink and green.
Speaker 2: Okay, but this isn't like this has nothing to do
Speaker 2: with Pepa Pig no X brand.
Speaker 4: It is not related to Peppa Pig at all.
Speaker 5: And there is a little hole on the top if
Speaker 5: you want to make it a key chain or some
Speaker 5: sort of in your necklace.
Speaker 2: Maybe do you have any keychain stuff? What's on your keychain?
Speaker 5: We have this Texas keychain for this musician Charlie Crockett.
Speaker 2: Is that also a bottle opener.
Speaker 5: This is a bottle opener too. It was very conditioned
Speaker 5: in the shape of Texas and it has CC on it.
Speaker 4: For Charlie Crockett.
Speaker 2: I don't feel like I have anything currently on my
Speaker 2: keychain other than like my library card I read, Yeah,
Speaker 2: I read a Ralph's card, Save my Big Savings, and
Speaker 2: then a third rock climbing gym.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, which we've done to.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so then you bailed.
Speaker 5: And well I bailed, but also let's talk about it.
Speaker 5: We got the top road certification. We both went together.
Speaker 5: We were going for a while. We got certified to
Speaker 5: help each other do the top roping. And during the test,
Speaker 5: I accidentally let you fall a little bit and you've never.
Speaker 2: Let you live in is carefully chosen word. We don't
Speaker 2: know what was actually happening.
Speaker 5: A fifteen year old girl that was that was supervising us,
Speaker 5: that was going to give us a certification, was talking
Speaker 5: to me about something, and you jumped because because there's
Speaker 5: the whole thing where you're supposed to surprise me with
Speaker 5: a jump.
Speaker 2: That's right, that's a weird surprised the jump while she
Speaker 2: was talking, Oh wow, I forgot about this.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you were in free fall and you
Speaker 4: freaked out.
Speaker 2: I'm kind of a master of surprise, you are. I
Speaker 2: shocked you in a way that almost ended my life.
Speaker 5: Yes, exactly, and pan oh man, would that event on
Speaker 5: my hands? I?
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: We were all climbed together for a while, and we
Speaker 2: usually do bouldering, which is without the ropes. We both
Speaker 2: passed the test with the top roping where you're pulling
Speaker 2: each other up and down the wall, and then never
Speaker 2: tried it again on it now, I don't know any
Speaker 2: of the things.
Speaker 4: No, I don't remember any of them at all.
Speaker 2: So I would have to retrain.
Speaker 4: There's all the stuff you have to repeat to each
Speaker 4: other and see.
Speaker 2: There's like it's almost like a trust exercise, which gets
Speaker 2: a little uncomfortable. Yeah, there's a lot of like looking
Speaker 2: into each other's eyes and saying I did this.
Speaker 4: Did you feel very bonding? It felt very like we
Speaker 4: are in this together.
Speaker 2: Right. If you immediately broke my trust, it's hard to live.
Speaker 2: I'm still going to the rock climbing gym. I don't
Speaker 2: give up, Okay, I you know I choose to do
Speaker 2: something and I follow through.
Speaker 4: Sure, I'm going to let that pass as a slight
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 5: I don't know if that's what you meant it as
Speaker 5: it felt like I could event but I'm going to
Speaker 5: choose just to let it go right by because there
Speaker 5: are many things that I commit to, and some people
Speaker 5: call me the most committed in many ways, many capacities.
Speaker 4: Biking is one that I do.
Speaker 2: I'm just, you know, personal experience from my little keyhole
Speaker 2: into your life. Sure, I've seen you give up immediately.
Speaker 4: Okay, immediately, Okay.
Speaker 5: I want to remind you that I've been rock climbing
Speaker 5: on an off since twenty fifteen.
Speaker 4: So as much as like Gwen, I do restart, well.
Speaker 2: I'm still having a good time there. But I will
Speaker 2: say anytime there are children present, my enjoyment it drops
Speaker 2: by probably forty percent.
Speaker 4: And that's the question.
Speaker 5: How can you take control and let kids know not
Speaker 5: to mess with you without violating any sort of thing.
Speaker 2: Right, without being like the mean adults with water that
Speaker 2: they have.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you can't be the kind of grumpy guy.
Speaker 2: I would embrace witch character, the witch at the rock Climbing.
Speaker 4: The rock climbing Witch.
Speaker 2: That's a children's book. It's about and it's based on you.
Speaker 2: It's about a witch that starts rock climbing, and then
Speaker 2: she decides to give up, and then she has to
Speaker 2: learn to commit to make it to the top of
Speaker 2: the cliff to get.
Speaker 5: To her Who knew that witches still need to learn
Speaker 5: lessons after all they've lived.
Speaker 2: I'm going to write that book. She leaves her broom
Speaker 2: at the top of the cliff and has to climb
Speaker 2: back up. That's really good, interesting.
Speaker 4: Story, very interesting, and the moral is never give.
Speaker 2: Up, never give up, never give up. Okay, so I'm
Speaker 2: still rock climbing. I'm doing all these great things. Let's
Speaker 2: get back into the bag. Okay, Okay, this is a
Speaker 2: bigger one. Oh and I should say the pig was
Speaker 2: very tiny. Pig is smaller, little pig. And I'm pulling
Speaker 2: out another thing. This says, Oh, this is very nice.
Speaker 4: I made you a personalized placard.
Speaker 2: It says I said no gifts with Bridger Weineger. And
Speaker 2: almost every letter is headed the right direction outside of
Speaker 2: the final g in my name h on the wid
Speaker 2: Oh so this may be thrown away, yeah astroid, Yeah,
Speaker 2: not perfect, thrown into the ocean.
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, oh yeah, this is good.
Speaker 2: That's where I take all my plastics.
Speaker 4: This is great, Yeah, they're gonna love this.
Speaker 2: Or I'll take it to one of those greats that
Speaker 2: says no dumping with the dolphin on it. And I said, well,
Speaker 2: I'm the exception to the rule.
Speaker 4: Here's my garbage, all goes into the ocean. You're just
Speaker 4: going to push all this plastic into a So.
Speaker 2: This is very sweet. I have a couple of shelves
Speaker 2: in my office where I've been collecting all my gifts
Speaker 2: and this can go right up there, perfect to kind
Speaker 2: of I've always felt like, should there a burglar come
Speaker 2: into that, they'll see all this kind of just these
Speaker 2: items I have no relation to each other, and they'll
Speaker 2: be baffled. Yes, And I want to think about the
Speaker 2: burglar in this moment than what if they saw this
Speaker 2: and they're a listener to the podcast and then it
Speaker 2: clicks for that.
Speaker 5: And they'll be like, wow, if they're the listener that
Speaker 5: what if they're listening to you while they're burgling?
Speaker 2: What right thing to do while you're burgling? Put in
Speaker 2: your air pods or other brand? I don't care. And
Speaker 2: then you're getting into somebody's home. You're a cat burglar.
Speaker 2: You need something, you're bored, you're alone, you're in your
Speaker 2: black unitard and you're listening to me and Patrick, that's
Speaker 2: a great thing. That's a great tip for a.
Speaker 4: Burglar, such a stressful job.
Speaker 2: I actually think, and I want to hear your your
Speaker 2: response to this, but I think if I were to
Speaker 2: become a career criminal, cat burglar, I mean, no question,
Speaker 2: that's what I am.
Speaker 4: Career criminal.
Speaker 2: Mm hm, what would you be?
Speaker 4: Cat burglar? As in stealing little things here and there?
Speaker 2: No, as in, like you know, I'm in the full suit,
Speaker 2: head to toe, black sleek, I'm frequently on all fours,
Speaker 2: crawling around, very stealthy, agile like dropping from the ceiling frequently,
Speaker 2: like in a museum, m stealing the most rare jewel.
Speaker 2: That would be number one for me.
Speaker 4: That sounds fun.
Speaker 5: I would probably get into money laundering because you could,
Speaker 5: you could build some wild business. There was there was
Speaker 5: a business in Boston. I went to school in Boston,
Speaker 5: and there's a business in the North End that I
Speaker 5: used to walk by all the time. It was just
Speaker 5: called what do you need? And it said like dog sitting.
Speaker 4: Babysitting, clients repair.
Speaker 5: It was a guy I think that bought a store
Speaker 5: front and just said, what do you need and you
Speaker 5: would walk in and you'd say, what I need to
Speaker 5: work on cyber I need like someone to work them
Speaker 5: on my computer, and I'll do that.
Speaker 2: This is kind of the original version of like a
Speaker 2: task grab what was that fiver or whatever just pay
Speaker 2: people to do.
Speaker 4: But he just was a man that sat in a store.
Speaker 2: Did you ever have him do something for? No?
Speaker 5: But I used to walk by all the time, and
Speaker 5: I looked it up the other day and and unfortunately,
Speaker 5: I think task grab it did shut what do you
Speaker 5: need down?
Speaker 4: Oh boy? Because he's probably got a lot on his plate, right,
Speaker 4: and he probably can't compete.
Speaker 2: With brick and mortar.
Speaker 4: Brick and mortar, but something like that or.
Speaker 5: Something really fun, like some weird store that sells very
Speaker 5: specific trinkets or something like that. And then all day
Speaker 5: you sit around and kind of just kind of fuck around,
Speaker 5: or you sit in the front and you just smoke
Speaker 5: a cigarette with your friends, and then you say, you're
Speaker 5: a store that sounds kind of fun.
Speaker 2: That does sound nice. You get to pick the music
Speaker 2: that's coming over the speakers, you get to kind of
Speaker 2: design the store, You get to respond to Yelp reviews
Speaker 2: like I'm sorry that your experience wasn't great. I dm
Speaker 2: to you, let's take care of this, that kind of thing.
Speaker 5: And you're never going to get fired unless your bosses
Speaker 5: get arrested, right right, So, so because they don't care
Speaker 5: how the business is going.
Speaker 4: So it's the perfect situation. You can do whatever you want.
Speaker 2: Oh so, in this situation, you're not the head of
Speaker 2: the criminal enterprise. No, you're being used.
Speaker 4: I'm being used. But I still think it's criminal.
Speaker 2: Okay, I mean it is criminal. You've agreed to do this. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I was just assuming that you had some illicit
Speaker 2: business that you were then washing through your jewelry.
Speaker 4: No, I'm just washing. I'm just washing. I think that's
Speaker 4: all I would want to do.
Speaker 5: I wouldn't want to do any sort of illicit business
Speaker 5: where I'm moving money around, right, stealing things.
Speaker 2: But I think I could be a good face for
Speaker 2: something interesting. Okay, I think that's an nice business. And Nope,
Speaker 2: not that many people get hurt, No, not really, except
Speaker 2: for all of the people that were defrauded by your
Speaker 2: boss exactly.
Speaker 4: But at the end of the day, so was I.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're you are a victim here. You can be
Speaker 2: counted among the other victims.
Speaker 4: I'm ready to be a victim.
Speaker 5: Happy to be a purp until I become a victim.
Speaker 4: I'm curady to go.
Speaker 2: All right, let's reach into the bag again.
Speaker 4: I don't think you understand how many things are.
Speaker 2: I don't care. This podcast can be nine hours. Okay,
Speaker 2: let's do the boss.
Speaker 4: Let's buckle up.
Speaker 2: Okay, let's see this is I'll see you in court
Speaker 2: crossed out. Then it says i'll see you in shorts.
Speaker 4: That's a fun phrase. I think I came up with
Speaker 4: that and as I was drawing it.
Speaker 2: That's a great That is a great decoration. That's a
Speaker 2: fun thing that could be on any pillow.
Speaker 4: I can see it being on a kitchen, in the kitchen,
Speaker 4: on a pillow. I'll see you in shorts is kind
Speaker 4: of a fun it's.
Speaker 2: Kind of sexual harassment.
Speaker 5: You're like, what's the what's the situation where instead of
Speaker 5: saying I'll see you in court, you're.
Speaker 2: Saying it's almost more of a threat.
Speaker 4: Seen someone in shorts.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like when are like, you're going to be
Speaker 2: spying on me or you're going to force me into them?
Speaker 2: How are you going to get me into the.
Speaker 5: Shop instead of suing you, I'm taking you on vacation
Speaker 5: as kind of another way you can think of it.
Speaker 2: That's a funny thing to something to do to somebody
Speaker 2: who's wronged you. They're like Patrick's coming for me. I
Speaker 2: know he's hiring a lawyer, and then you take them
Speaker 2: on vacation instick exactly.
Speaker 4: And that's very unnerving.
Speaker 2: Because I think you're going to kill them on like
Speaker 2: out on to put off the cruise.
Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. I think that have you ever done that? Where?
Speaker 5: And that is that is a reaction, not that exact thing,
Speaker 5: but that's a reaction I have sometimes where I go,
Speaker 5: this person has been so awful to me, I'm going
Speaker 5: to be so unbelievably nice to them for so long,
Speaker 5: and I just really feel like it's revenge.
Speaker 2: I try to do that, and unfortunately my hatred is
Speaker 2: always so large that it does not allow the energy
Speaker 2: to be kind.
Speaker 5: I get very jealous of people that can be chill
Speaker 5: with their hatred, that can quietly hate someone, because I'm
Speaker 5: somebody that's like this will not stand.
Speaker 2: But see, I like, if I tried. I'm also so
Speaker 2: unbelievably fragile that when they're horrible to me, while I'm
Speaker 2: doing this fake nice thing. I'm crying. I'm immediately crying,
Speaker 2: tears in my eyes, my voice is cracking. I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: they win again.
Speaker 4: It's too hard. So I guess you. I guess you'll
Speaker 4: just see them in court.
Speaker 2: Short, I need an attorney to as the middleman. Okay,
Speaker 2: we're reaching Taylor. I had the shorts made for you.
Speaker 2: They fit your thighs perfectly. Yeah, exactly, Okay, reaching back in. Now,
Speaker 2: this actually feels like a keychain. Let's see.
Speaker 5: Oh this is Bridger, Fridger, I made you a personalized keychain.
Speaker 4: That's great.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this has to go on my keys, and it
Speaker 2: has a little I would say this is either a
Speaker 2: worm crawling across a baguette or like a red rock
Speaker 2: in the desert.
Speaker 4: Yeah, those are great choices. I was going for spaghetti,
Speaker 4: but I didn't have whites.
Speaker 5: I couldn't make a plate, so it's just a loose
Speaker 5: pile of spaghetti with meat balls and sauce.
Speaker 2: I see it now, I do see it now. But
Speaker 2: what a nice uh worship test of Yeah, exactly, certainly,
Speaker 2: we know exactly what I'm thinking. Exactly, gross thoughts I'm having.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I thought you could, and I think there's another
Speaker 4: key chain in there.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna you're like, yeah, this came with a
Speaker 2: whole set another keychain.
Speaker 4: Oh here it is.
Speaker 2: Oh this is bad boys, So I don't even need
Speaker 2: the bridge. Everyone knows who this.
Speaker 5: Is a bad boy. And I actually did screw this up.
Speaker 5: I put the hole on the bottom instead of the top.
Speaker 2: Well that's a bad boy, moved.
Speaker 5: And putting it on right was maybe the best one
Speaker 5: I did, because it's got to think in a blue vibe.
Speaker 5: The bees are just sensational and I just think it's
Speaker 5: really fun.
Speaker 2: There's a nasty energy here that nobody can deny. Exactly
Speaker 2: planning that to a valet and they're like, oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: this guy.
Speaker 5: Do not trying to emulate those kind of rancid stickers
Speaker 5: you could get for fifty cents that will come out
Speaker 5: in those little sleeves. I don't I'm familiar like at
Speaker 5: skadiums or whatever, like roller Ring.
Speaker 2: You're seeing a lot of words though I don't understand.
Speaker 2: I mean, I obviously know what a skadium is, but
Speaker 2: I've never heard that before.
Speaker 5: There's those things that are like like I think maybe
Speaker 5: there's a place in Arlington, tex where I'm from that's
Speaker 5: just called the Skadium.
Speaker 4: Skadium, the Arlington Stadium.
Speaker 2: We had classic skating, classic skating, that's all.
Speaker 5: Maybe a roller away, yeah yeah, I think maybe the
Speaker 5: Skadium is branded. Maybe please don't come after me Skadium
Speaker 5: if you can, if you've mobilized. But I but you
Speaker 5: see those, you know, it's just like the weird garbage
Speaker 5: pale kids.
Speaker 2: Oh right. Or there's like kind of like a like
Speaker 2: an angel that's in some risk clothing.
Speaker 4: Totally always a tweetybird in a hoodie or something.
Speaker 2: I love her, yeah, yeah, love, Oh.
Speaker 4: You love tweety bird. That's interesting. Keep digging.
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, Okay, go back into this. Okay, I'm there.
Speaker 2: I feel like there are two things, and there are
Speaker 2: actually quite a few things. Ok I'm gonna pull one out,
Speaker 2: and I know this is I said no gifts again.
Speaker 2: It's a little banner. This is almost like a miniature
Speaker 2: thing that could go on a train set. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: perfect little flag or what it is a again, is
Speaker 2: a piece of merch essentially keychain.
Speaker 4: And you can sell this.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna sell this.
Speaker 5: I figured you could sell if this is any of
Speaker 5: the stuff you could Yeah. I thought I'd come on
Speaker 5: and just build you some merch.
Speaker 2: That's very cute.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's nice.
Speaker 2: I'm going to force somebody else to put that on
Speaker 2: their keychain as advertising.
Speaker 4: Well that's a good idea. Someone who really owes you something. Yeah,
Speaker 4: screwed up big time.
Speaker 2: Okay, now I'm pulling out. Oh no, this isn't even
Speaker 2: smaller keychain that says crushable with a small happy face on.
Speaker 2: How many keychains do you think? I, well, you have
Speaker 2: a lot more.
Speaker 4: Now I think this one is.
Speaker 5: You know, I got into a tear of writing little phrases,
Speaker 5: So there's a lot of tiny phrases in here that
Speaker 5: you can ascribe to or not ascribe to, and you
Speaker 5: canme in assign these other people.
Speaker 2: This is perfect for when Jim leaves me perfect I like,
Speaker 2: I have to take everything else else off my keychain.
Speaker 2: I put this on as kind of a pathetic attempt
Speaker 2: to get somebody else to look at.
Speaker 5: It's gonna be like the black smoke of Bridger being single.
Speaker 5: It's gonna be like the coming from the from the chimney.
Speaker 5: Everyone notices the tidy crush of lite keychain on your It's.
Speaker 2: So small that whoever notices it has to really be
Speaker 2: observing me. Exactly, and they'll realize how this person's desperate.
Speaker 4: You're catching them.
Speaker 2: Okay, I've got to catch Okay, now we're reaching back in.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I went I went hogwild. I'll tell you how
Speaker 4: easy it is to make shrinkydinks. You just kind of keep.
Speaker 2: Okay, Now I think this maybe this is a bird, yeah,
Speaker 2: with a little yellow bird with big eyes and you
Speaker 2: know an orange beak. Is this tweetybird?
Speaker 4: If you're gonna believe it.
Speaker 5: I drew that tweetybird completely from memory and without a sensil.
Speaker 5: So there was a period of time where I just
Speaker 5: kind of started drawing what I would imagine things would
Speaker 5: be for you. I said, I think he's gonna want
Speaker 5: some sort of version of a tweety bird.
Speaker 2: Well, you know something that I used to do a
Speaker 2: lot was create on demand Valentines for people, and I'd say,
Speaker 2: what's your favorite cartoon or video game character? And then
Speaker 2: within seconds this is I'm very good at it. I've
Speaker 2: created a drawing of your favorite cartoon or video game
Speaker 2: character with a Valentine's phrase related to the character. No way,
Speaker 2: maybe I'll do that for you during the Now that's
Speaker 2: a little involved doesn't want that, so this is kind
Speaker 2: of related to that.
Speaker 5: That's kind of related. Did you have a cartoon character
Speaker 5: that was your calling card? I feel like every kid
Speaker 5: had a cartoon character they could draw.
Speaker 2: Really Tasmanian devil, No way, he's my favorite. He's pretty
Speaker 2: easy to draw. Okay, his eyes are one thing, so
Speaker 2: you don't have to do two eyes, and then the
Speaker 2: noses right there in the middle. And he's kind of
Speaker 2: just a chicken drum top.
Speaker 4: Everyone describes him as that.
Speaker 2: And when I was in about fourth grade, it was
Speaker 2: kind of the peak of before it was an ironic
Speaker 2: thing to do wear Looney Tuned shirts where they're in
Speaker 2: various street where totally jerseys, and they were like flashing
Speaker 2: gang signs or what have you.
Speaker 5: Luney Tunes just really had kind of a public domain
Speaker 5: moment where it was like the University of Nevada had bugs,
Speaker 5: bunnies lighting a cigarettell everywhere.
Speaker 2: What was yours?
Speaker 5: I knew how to draw? I think it was this dragon.
Speaker 5: I didn't I didn't know how to draw any specific characters. Oh,
Speaker 5: but it was this dragon that I learned from some
Speaker 5: sort of art book.
Speaker 4: Oh, how boring.
Speaker 5: It was very boring, and I and I remembered I
Speaker 5: had a very specific way of drawing children and people,
Speaker 5: and their eyes.
Speaker 4: Were so big and they looked like boobs looking back
Speaker 4: at it. I made the eyes so big.
Speaker 2: Eyes almost always looked like boobs when you first start
Speaker 2: start drawing. And that's why you have to get to
Speaker 2: the rest of the face features quickly, yes, because otherwise
Speaker 2: if somebody observes you, let's say you're drawing in class
Speaker 2: or like pervert, but they could get a nose in
Speaker 2: their mouth or like oh.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: And it's unfair that people jump to that conclusion. It
Speaker 2: is unfair.
Speaker 4: I will say to counter that.
Speaker 5: When I was in oh Man, I must have been
Speaker 5: in maybe kindergarten or first grade. My mom was a
Speaker 5: teacher at a kind of an inner city school in
Speaker 5: Fort Worth. It was only six graders, and I went
Speaker 5: with her to class and I was, for some reason,
Speaker 5: sitting in the back of the class. She was just
Speaker 5: letting us kind of walk around class, which is for
Speaker 5: a twelve year old probably was a little much. But
Speaker 5: this kid was like, look at this, and he had
Speaker 5: drawn like a naked woman's boobs and and and vagina
Speaker 5: entire anatomy and in her entire anatomy. No had no arms.
Speaker 5: Oh okay, so no nothing below the need not for
Speaker 5: to women. And I said, and I told him that,
Speaker 5: I said, hold on a minute.
Speaker 2: Sir, this is not a feminist message.
Speaker 4: I said, this is not feminist. I told him I was.
Speaker 4: I was, I was six, and I said, this is
Speaker 4: I cannot stand for this.
Speaker 2: What was your actual reaction?
Speaker 4: I remember being like, what is that?
Speaker 5: Kind of being like what you know? And then and
Speaker 5: then we just kind of moved on. But just thinking
Speaker 5: about a twelve year old drawing a naked woman for
Speaker 5: a six year old, you know what's going on in all.
Speaker 2: Of that circle of life. I feel like that's exactly
Speaker 2: what needs to be happening. I'm trying to wonder if,
Speaker 2: like who the like pervert boy was for me, like
Speaker 2: showing me all those things. And I can't really recall.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think within Mormonism that always everybody's very
Speaker 2: on alert about showing that kind of thing publicly. So
Speaker 2: I don't remember there ever being like an older boy
Speaker 2: being like, look at this. I do remember being in
Speaker 2: a tent at boy Scout camp and every other one
Speaker 2: of the boys was talking about their basically their sexual fantasies.
Speaker 2: We were like in seventh grade and I'm sitting there gay,
Speaker 2: have no interest in women whatsoever, silent After the camping trip,
Speaker 2: my dad was there. I'm the one who gets it
Speaker 2: firm talking to Really, I'm the one who gets in trouble.
Speaker 2: I didn't say a peep. Meanwhile, Sam, is you know,
Speaker 2: perving it up? So I guess that's kind of my
Speaker 2: whole thing. So I was out of it for a while.
Speaker 5: Did you ever have that experiences where people were like
Speaker 5: looking at nude magazines together? Because I'm gonna be honest,
Speaker 5: I was never quite involved with that. I think I
Speaker 5: was at some sort of maybe middle school or high
Speaker 5: school party where like we turned on Skinemax right right,
Speaker 5: just kind of sitting around watching it. But I always
Speaker 5: was like, and because I'm like, you know, a little
Speaker 5: quiet queer boy too, being like, am am I supposed
Speaker 5: to like have an erection right now?
Speaker 4: Is it important for me? Will they notice? Well? Do
Speaker 4: we all have the performativeness of this?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 5: How do I need to engage in this to make
Speaker 5: sure that I'm right there with everybody?
Speaker 2: This did? Like my friend group began like in late
Speaker 2: elementary beginning middle school, Like we're watching late night cable yeah,
Speaker 2: and I it allowed me because I naturally had no
Speaker 2: interest in it whatsoever. But like that didn't click for
Speaker 2: me that it was just who I was. It allowed me,
Speaker 2: And this probably just speaks volumes about who I am.
Speaker 2: I kind of just felt like I was taking the
Speaker 2: high road. It's like he's making the right choice. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but it's because it was the easiest thing in the
Speaker 2: world for me to be, like, oh, I don't want
Speaker 2: to see naked women on.
Speaker 4: Cable exactly moral. No, I won't be doing that. Sorry, guys,
Speaker 4: I like respecting a woman.
Speaker 2: I'm going to heaven.
Speaker 4: You guys have fun with cable. I'm going to heaven.
Speaker 4: I hope this feels good for now. It's going to
Speaker 4: burn it.
Speaker 2: It's going to be very hot in a little while,
Speaker 2: especially if you die hardly like a playground incident.
Speaker 4: Absolutely, you are toast, bunny, You are toast.
Speaker 2: Okay, let's reach back into the bag.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: Oh, I think we're uh two left?
Speaker 4: I think there's more than two.
Speaker 2: Oh you're kidding, Okay, I mean I'm going to take
Speaker 2: out two at this point. One's a bunny. Is this
Speaker 2: supposed to be bugs?
Speaker 4: That's supposed to be bugs?
Speaker 2: I love Bugs. Bunny Bugs is great. I love when
Speaker 2: he dresses up as a lady.
Speaker 4: He's great.
Speaker 2: He's very funny, he's fantastic, he's he does it all.
Speaker 2: He's rascal. Yeah, and then I I did. I'm now
Speaker 2: this is triggering a memory. I had a crush on
Speaker 2: pepe Le Pew, who has been canceled because he was
Speaker 2: kind of a rape figure. That's true. I think I
Speaker 2: think they're like, let's get this guy.
Speaker 4: I know he's canceled.
Speaker 2: A crush, a crush on him. He's maybe like kindergartener
Speaker 2: first grade because he was so he was like a
Speaker 2: handsome guy who was so sexual. He was after all
Speaker 2: the ladies. He was very cute.
Speaker 4: He was very confident too. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Wow, I had forgotten about that completely.
Speaker 4: Wow.
Speaker 2: That's crazy interesting. And now he's gone. You can't you
Speaker 2: can't do anything anymore. You can't be a skunk that
Speaker 2: harasses women.
Speaker 4: Absolutely not. The times have changed.
Speaker 2: He started a not right podcast.
Speaker 4: You can't say anything anymore.
Speaker 2: And then the other thing is another key chain, that
Speaker 2: is angel.
Speaker 4: It says angel Heaven, speaking of Heaven.
Speaker 2: Well, this is kind of like a like a late nineties,
Speaker 2: early thousands, like you went to the skate center and
Speaker 2: bought some trashy exactly.
Speaker 5: I got kind of in the zone doing it yesterday,
Speaker 5: just cooking by the oven, you know, And that's the
Speaker 5: fun thing.
Speaker 4: I cooked my art.
Speaker 2: I want to try this you got it actually has
Speaker 2: shrinky dinks.
Speaker 5: Shrinky dinks, And I don't think this is the real brand.
Speaker 5: I think this is a knockoff. Shrinkyd Ink is copyrighted.
Speaker 2: Is it kind of like? I mean, this reminds me
Speaker 2: of creepy crawlers? Did you ever do those?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Is that like the boys? Easy big oven.
Speaker 2: Right where you do little worms? Yeah? Yeah, stuff. Boys
Speaker 2: couldn't make cookies, no, no, no, boys had to make
Speaker 2: worms useless rubber cookies are gay. Although the I mean,
Speaker 2: the colorful worms were a little gay. I'm making all
Speaker 2: sorts of rainbow esque.
Speaker 4: Worms worms, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely, I loved the creepy crawlers.
Speaker 4: I know. We gotta we gotta destigmatized crafts in general.
Speaker 2: Yea, everybody loves a craft. Yes, give me a break.
Speaker 2: You're at a table with friends making something.
Speaker 4: Absolutely.
Speaker 2: I think we're as a society turning towards crafts. It's
Speaker 2: like we can all do a craft.
Speaker 4: I think so I think so, and I hope so.
Speaker 5: I think I actually do think the new generation is
Speaker 5: very open to anything. If you like whatever, be into whatever,
Speaker 5: make a craft totally totally. I think when I was
Speaker 5: in Texas there was a lot of fear of anything
Speaker 5: anything else, you know what I mean, very very scary.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The only time we really as boys did a
Speaker 2: craft was on the fourth of July. Grandma had a
Speaker 2: craft to do, and I think that was the only
Speaker 2: time we were really allowed to do the craft interesting,
Speaker 2: unless it was like a school project.
Speaker 4: We did have a.
Speaker 5: This is where like Texas culture dips into like flamboyants
Speaker 5: and stuff.
Speaker 4: We had cub Scouts. We had a Blue and Gold
Speaker 4: Bank whet. We had a cake banking competition. Oh, it
Speaker 4: was very exciting.
Speaker 2: Do you remember what your cake was?
Speaker 4: I had multiple cakes that I competed in.
Speaker 5: I did one, I believe about one of them was
Speaker 5: like American Heroes, and I think I did one about
Speaker 5: the creation of penicillin.
Speaker 2: Oh.
Speaker 5: I made a cake with jelly beans and I made
Speaker 5: a syringe out of jelly beans or something like that.
Speaker 4: Oh, that's very cute, my brothers.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but it was definitely it was a Blue and
Speaker 5: Gold bank when so it was a blue and gold
Speaker 5: syringe or something.
Speaker 2: Right, was allergic to penicil and it's all tying together. Wowing,
Speaker 2: how everything kind of connects.
Speaker 4: Interesting, freaking out, this is so crazy.
Speaker 2: What a very spiritual podcast.
Speaker 4: I'm having an experience.
Speaker 2: Okay, well I think this may be the final two. Okay,
Speaker 2: once uh once is get a life. These are both
Speaker 2: keychains and one is just says shut up.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, so that was Those are a little more sassy,
Speaker 5: just in case you want to be a little sasy,
Speaker 5: and you can.
Speaker 4: Change your key chains every day if you want. Remorse
Speaker 4: will be raw.
Speaker 2: Getting a keychain on is one of the hardest things
Speaker 2: you can possibly do.
Speaker 4: How have we not fixed that? I mean this horrible circle.
Speaker 2: Oh the metal ring. Somebody needs shark tank opportunity. Let's
Speaker 2: get rid of the metal, horrible ring that sticks into
Speaker 2: your fingers. Let's do something that you can that's durable
Speaker 2: but is not dangerous.
Speaker 4: Totally. I think you should just dump out on the
Speaker 4: floor if there's any more.
Speaker 2: In there here, I'm gonna I'm not dumping. I'm not dumping.
Speaker 4: No dumping.
Speaker 2: Okay, now I'm dumping because I couldn't feel anything.
Speaker 4: Maybe there's nothing more that's it.
Speaker 2: Was there some other thing that you were like, this
Speaker 2: will be the final thing and it'll rule the podcast.
Speaker 4: Is angel, and then there should be one that says devil.
Speaker 4: Oh interesting, but maybe the devil disappeared.
Speaker 2: Oh now, I mean after what we've been Yeah, that's
Speaker 2: a little spiritual podcast. Okay, it's gone.
Speaker 4: Wow, that's freaky.
Speaker 2: Yeah, make of that what you will, Believe it or not.
Speaker 2: There's a very dark energy right now. Absolutely, there's a
Speaker 2: dark mist surround it.
Speaker 4: I can't believe.
Speaker 2: I don't like where this is heading. Okay, Yeah, I've
Speaker 2: done simply digging, and I'm very good at rooting around
Speaker 2: in a bag. Yeah yeah, yeah, because that's all I
Speaker 2: do all day to find a little personal bag.
Speaker 4: I'm to find it hanging over me and then it's gone. Okay,
Speaker 4: it's gone. I believe you.
Speaker 2: People get that vibe from me anyway. They see, they
Speaker 2: look and they're like, who's this little devil? Devil? Yeah,
Speaker 2: so it doesn't matter. I don't need a lady.
Speaker 4: Well there you go.
Speaker 2: This is incredible. What a treasure trove of useful items?
Speaker 4: Yeah, really useful, right, I think that's what's nice.
Speaker 5: And I'm thinking if anybody wants one, just let me
Speaker 5: know and I'll just send one to you can send
Speaker 5: it hundreds and I'll send him.
Speaker 2: You'll let let's let this ruin your life.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna let that.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna take this over. I'm gonna let this kind
Speaker 5: of be my thing. I've decided this is who I
Speaker 5: am now. And so if you have what your life
Speaker 5: to service, yeah, this is service to me. It's and
Speaker 5: I can write this off and this is five oh
Speaker 5: one C three, it's all.
Speaker 4: It's a nonprofit.
Speaker 2: All right. Well, I think it's time to play a game.
Speaker 2: Are you capable of playing a game?
Speaker 4: I am?
Speaker 2: Okay, let's get into it here this game we're gonna
Speaker 2: play Gift or a Curse? Great, and I need a
Speaker 2: number between one and ten from you.
Speaker 4: Let's do three.
Speaker 2: Okay, let me beat beep beep. Get into the dock
Speaker 2: here right now. You can recommend something, promote something. I
Speaker 2: encourage both, do whatever you want with the microphone. I'll
Speaker 2: be right.
Speaker 4: Oh great.
Speaker 5: So I am part of an improv podcast. The Bridger
Speaker 5: has been a guest on It's called Artist on Artists
Speaker 5: on Artists and Artists. It is an improvised roundtable where
Speaker 5: me and my friends Jeremy Colhayne, Kylie Brakeman and Angela
Speaker 5: Gierratana always pick a different topic. When Bridger came on, he.
Speaker 4: Did food stylists.
Speaker 5: He played a very wonderful character named Michelle Brett who
Speaker 5: was a very prolific food stylist. Every episode is a
Speaker 5: different type of artists. So we have wedding DJs and
Speaker 5: directors and writers and people who all played one line
Speaker 5: waiters in movies and all sorts of stuff. So check
Speaker 5: that out where you get your podcasts. And I'm also
Speaker 5: DJ on Radio Margaritaville on series six times. Check that
Speaker 5: out SIS Channel twenty four.
Speaker 2: Very nice, both great things.
Speaker 4: Yeah, fun stuff.
Speaker 2: I love your podcast. It's so funny and it was
Speaker 2: such an enjoyable time doing it, and no complaints.
Speaker 4: You are hilarious. It was so great.
Speaker 2: My recommendation this week, I think I actually know exactly
Speaker 2: what it is, and it's to not count on a
Speaker 2: bank for a public restaurant. Really, for some reason, and
Speaker 2: maybe this is only banks I've ever visited. They don't
Speaker 2: have public restrooms, so do not which I tried to
Speaker 2: do recently. I was waiting for somebody in the Costco
Speaker 2: parking lot. I needed to pee. I thought I'll go
Speaker 2: into the bank and use their bathroom. It didn't exist.
Speaker 4: Banks need to watch themselves.
Speaker 5: If they don't make themselves amenable, there's no reason for them.
Speaker 4: To be around here.
Speaker 5: Are villain Honestly, it's basically a wee work. It's so
Speaker 5: because all you do is you go in and apply
Speaker 5: for loans. You can do that in any conference room.
Speaker 5: Otherwise all the money is digital. So so you better
Speaker 5: check your privilege and allow us to take.
Speaker 4: Shit in there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think, I mean, my only, my only, Like
Speaker 2: my theory is that, like they don't want someone going
Speaker 2: in there and pulling a mask over their head or
Speaker 2: getting their gun ready.
Speaker 4: Oh is that?
Speaker 2: But that seems so stupid. It's like I'll just do
Speaker 2: it in the car and storm into the bank.
Speaker 4: How often do bank robberies still happen? Probably a lot,
Speaker 4: pretty frequently.
Speaker 2: And I I've I had a friend who was robbed
Speaker 2: once and he learned the statistic that it's like ninety
Speaker 2: eight percent of bank robbers are caught. Wow, So it's
Speaker 2: not a great gig. Yeah, So that's why I didn't
Speaker 2: pick it earlier as a criminal enterprise. Oh, the other
Speaker 2: thing I want to recommend is a song by this
Speaker 2: artist named Carol Anne Peg. I think that's her name.
Speaker 2: She's a and if the song is called a Witch's
Speaker 2: Guide to the Underground, Oh, I just want to make
Speaker 2: sure it's great. I mean that's her name because I
Speaker 2: recently came across it. If you like Kate Bush, this
Speaker 2: is like an earlier version. This is, you know, folky,
Speaker 2: somebody kind of singing about kind of slightly witchy, but folky.
Speaker 2: Everybody loves this song. Well, I'm gonna assume everybody loves
Speaker 2: is going to love this song.
Speaker 4: That's fantastic. I'm gonna I'm liking it right now.
Speaker 2: But let's get into the game. I feel like I
Speaker 2: completely forgot we were playing a game because I was
Speaker 2: so mad about the bank. I understand this is how
Speaker 2: we play Gift or a Curse. I'm gonna name three things.
Speaker 2: You're going to tell me if there're a gift or
Speaker 2: a curse and why, and then I'll tell you if
Speaker 2: you're right or wrong. There are correct answers. Does that
Speaker 2: make perfect sense? Okay? Number one this is from somebody
Speaker 2: a listener named Rebecca. Rebecca suggested gift or a Curse
Speaker 2: correctly predicting who the killer is in the first half
Speaker 2: of a show or movie like the viewer.
Speaker 5: As a viewer, Yeah, as a viewer, I think that's
Speaker 5: a curse because you can't let yourself enjoy something.
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, that's what I say. Okay, well, I think
Speaker 2: I'm going to tell you it's a gift. You're really
Speaker 2: absolutely what a fun feeling you're I mean, you feel
Speaker 2: like you're the smartest person in the room. Sure, and
Speaker 2: then you get to watch this murderer or the killer
Speaker 2: kind of do their thing the whole episode. You're tracking
Speaker 2: them almost as if you're a good uh you know,
Speaker 2: spy or FBI agent.
Speaker 5: I think if I if I guess the murderer, then
Speaker 5: I think they're so dumb like.
Speaker 4: You, guys. I beat you. I beat you this.
Speaker 5: I fucked up my whole car trying to buy a
Speaker 5: skeleton today, and I figured out who killed this person.
Speaker 5: I forgot out who's sending the codes. Embarrassing.
Speaker 2: Oh, I hate to hear you argue with me. You're wrong.
Speaker 2: It's a gift.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: I love to solve a puzzle quickly. Okay, number two,
Speaker 2: So you're failing so far, and that's fine. Understand someone
Speaker 2: named Mark has suggested gift or a curse.
Speaker 4: Fancy ketchup, Oh goodness, fancy ca I think fancy ketchup's
Speaker 4: a gift.
Speaker 2: Why because it delineates it between regular ketchup.
Speaker 5: Fancy ketchup always is a little zestier, let's be honest,
Speaker 5: And it's thicker, and it comes in glass. Other ketchup
Speaker 5: can come in plastic, And I think it's nice because
Speaker 5: ketchup deserves.
Speaker 4: To be on the spectrum of dining. You can have
Speaker 4: nice freetz.
Speaker 5: Why would we call something freeze instead of fries if
Speaker 5: we don't want them to be fancier, So we need
Speaker 5: to give them a better If you're gonna give someone
Speaker 5: a makeover, you can't have them wear the clothes they
Speaker 5: already wore, right, You got to give them a fancy dress.
Speaker 5: So you got to make a zesterier ketchup. It's a
Speaker 5: little thicker, it's a little nicer to scoop. So yes,
Speaker 5: I think it's a gift.
Speaker 2: Everyone knows it's a curse. Nobody likes fans wrong, nobody.
Speaker 2: You're always so unhappy when you go to a restaurant
Speaker 2: and they don't have regular ketchup. It never tastes right.
Speaker 2: Just give us all the sugar and vinegar. That's all
Speaker 2: anybody wants. Ask on at least you like regular ketchup
Speaker 2: more than fancy ketchup. Yeah, they think, so, you can answer.
Speaker 2: I honestly don't know the difference. And I also think
Speaker 2: that ketchup is very good. I think it's one of
Speaker 2: the lowest forms of a condiment. Okay, well, this is
Speaker 2: where the problem comes in. Then, so Honey's just doesn't
Speaker 2: like ketchup at all, so it doesn't matter. Wow, Okay,
Speaker 2: but you're wrong.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: I hate to hear it. You hate to hear it.
Speaker 2: Number three, This is from someone named Amy. A gift
Speaker 2: or a curse. Hotel bathrooms with full bottles of shampoo, conditioner,
Speaker 2: and soap attached to the shower wall instead of many
Speaker 2: bottles on the counter.
Speaker 4: Absolute curse.
Speaker 5: Why I think that's a curse because you can you
Speaker 5: know that all the other people have touched it. You
Speaker 5: know that they're just pumping it in, like freaking just
Speaker 5: people pumping just I hate that. I hate the feeling
Speaker 5: that they're just It's like I'm a man, like the
Speaker 5: like the machine that Gerbils use to drink water.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean. That's what those feel like
Speaker 4: to me, and I hate that.
Speaker 5: With a little ball on them, let's drive me crazy.
Speaker 4: I hate those.
Speaker 5: I absolutely genuinely hate those. Give me a thing to
Speaker 5: take home, Give me a little plastic thing. I understand
Speaker 5: that it's less environmentally friendly, but I can't store that in,
Speaker 5: you know, in case I run out of soap, in
Speaker 5: case I'm going on another trip.
Speaker 4: I'm not buying that stuff.
Speaker 2: Right, what do you think, Well, listener, you may have
Speaker 2: just heard the garbage truck driving through the neighborhood. And
Speaker 2: that's an interesting coincidence because it's kind of ringing the
Speaker 2: bell that Patrick is one of very few to have
Speaker 2: lost this game. They're a gift, Yes, because of me.
Speaker 2: They're using the nice stuff.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 2: If they give you the little thing on the counter,
Speaker 2: that means it's some bizarre brand no one has ever
Speaker 2: heard of. It's gonna absolutely destroy your hair. Skin doesn't
Speaker 2: smell as good you're in the shower. It's slipping out
Speaker 2: of your hands while you're trying to squeeze it. Not
Speaker 2: environmentally friendly. No, you gotta have the one attached to
Speaker 2: the wall.
Speaker 4: I'll diw on this hill.
Speaker 2: The labo.
Speaker 4: Have you heard al lavo? Lo lavo comes into little things.
Speaker 5: I've never seen l lavo in an economy size fucking trough.
Speaker 5: Or you pump it out of the wall, you press
Speaker 5: the button, you hear a squeeze noise. Give me a break,
Speaker 5: I'm in a shower. You got to use them. No way,
Speaker 5: I don't care. That's not's leisurely. Leisurely is is it?
Speaker 5: And fancy and exquisite? That's the bottle.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, you're going to the wrong hotels, my friend.
Speaker 4: I'm going to Margaritaville's and I'm enjoying every single one
Speaker 4: of them.
Speaker 2: Okay, Margaritaville, They're just they're probably just in the uh
Speaker 2: testing stages of putting the nice ones on the wall.
Speaker 2: Yeah right, It's just you're afraid of the future. Ultimately,
Speaker 2: you're scared of change.
Speaker 4: No way.
Speaker 2: Oh well, you lost, and at least you have any
Speaker 2: idea how many people have lost. It's got to be like,
Speaker 2: oh on this, this is gonna check just so you
Speaker 2: feel worse.
Speaker 4: Wow, so I really lost?
Speaker 2: You lost? Way more people have won this game?
Speaker 4: Actually, no way lost?
Speaker 2: Oh wow, I don't know that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so there's only been you are the fifth loser.
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2: In hundreds of episodes, am I in good company? Carl
Speaker 2: Tart okay, sense, Jesse Tyler, Ferguson okay, Irene too, and
Speaker 2: Gillian Jacobs.
Speaker 4: That's crazy. We're on a text thread. I'm going to
Speaker 4: text them all interesting.
Speaker 2: You and Carl have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 4: We have a lot to talk about.
Speaker 2: He's going to be very mad at you.
Speaker 4: I'm going to be chatting with Carl.
Speaker 2: He wanted he was in rare company until now, and
Speaker 2: now you've kind of soiled the pristine pool of losers.
Speaker 4: Wow, pristine full of losers. I'm the loser.
Speaker 2: You're the worst. Broughtser is always the latest loser.
Speaker 4: Losing always meant something.
Speaker 2: Your louser is kind of like, oh you're really bad.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, you haven't. You haven't adapted with other people.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, badly played. Let's try to move on. This
Speaker 2: is the final segment of the podcast. It's called I
Speaker 2: Said No Emails. People write into I Said No Gifts
Speaker 2: at gmail dot com with questions any type of question.
Speaker 2: People frequently writing about gifts. But I can't be clear
Speaker 2: enough to the listener. I don't care write in about
Speaker 2: whatever you want, we answer a question.
Speaker 4: I would love that now.
Speaker 2: Okay, let me read this, says dear wise, bridger and
Speaker 2: helpful guest. Very nice. I was recently put in a
Speaker 2: situation where my brother gave me an unexpected gift and
Speaker 2: I was caught with nothing to give him in return.
Speaker 2: We live far apart and will often exchange gifts from
Speaker 2: our respective cities when we see each other. We happened
Speaker 2: to be vacationing in the same place and so met
Speaker 2: up for an afternoon and dinner when our paths crossed,
Speaker 2: which was very nice. Since we were both traveling, I
Speaker 2: assumed we wouldn't be exchanging our regular gifts due to
Speaker 2: packing constraints. I also assumed we were visiting the same country,
Speaker 2: so why by the other a souvenir when we are
Speaker 2: all going to the same place and each should would
Speaker 2: pick their own. The second assumption was my mistake, and
Speaker 2: he brought my husband and me very nice souvenir gifts.
Speaker 2: My plan was then to pay for dinner, but he
Speaker 2: did that sneaky move and approach the waiter away from
Speaker 2: the table and paid. I am very appreciative of his
Speaker 2: thoughtfulness and generosity, but we are competitive, and there was
Speaker 2: a smugness and he knew he bested me this time around.
Speaker 2: I would appreciate any gift is to help me, even
Speaker 2: the score. He has a cat, enjoys gambling, snowboarding, whiskey,
Speaker 2: and his favorite food is mashed potatoes. I love the podcast.
Speaker 2: Thanks Anna. Wow. Okay, now about half well, when we
Speaker 2: got to the brother suddenly flashing the cash, yeah, I
Speaker 2: started to think of something, and then we got to gambling,
Speaker 2: and then I actually think my theory is confirmed. He's
Speaker 2: in financial trouble. You think so, he's peacocking. He's trying
Speaker 2: to He's like trying to prove it. He doesn't want
Speaker 2: her look peeking behind the curtain.
Speaker 4: What I was gonna say it's a little similar is
Speaker 4: this brother needs.
Speaker 2: To let people in.
Speaker 5: Interesting because it's this feeling of the superiority all the time.
Speaker 4: I'm in charge, I can help. I'm the provider, right.
Speaker 5: I won't receive as anything because receiving something is vulnerable.
Speaker 2: Oh so fascinating.
Speaker 4: That lines up with the gambling addiction of the game problem.
Speaker 2: He's so out of money, and let's be clear, he
Speaker 2: stepped away from the table to pay. We didn't see
Speaker 2: money exchange. There could have been a threat, that's that
Speaker 2: could have been it. Yeah, there's some waiter out there
Speaker 2: scared for their life.
Speaker 5: I also really don't like the I paid quietly without
Speaker 5: telling you move.
Speaker 2: Don't tell me.
Speaker 5: And well, I just don't like the idea that you're
Speaker 5: standing talking to a waiter, you know what I mean.
Speaker 5: I think that looks unnatural and I think I think
Speaker 5: waiter should be received. But when you see somebody standing,
Speaker 5: there must be.
Speaker 4: Something terribly wrong.
Speaker 2: They're dominating them.
Speaker 4: It feels like a wheeling and dealing kind of thing. Right,
Speaker 4: it's not their realm.
Speaker 5: They're standing, they're in charge, right, they're running the place,
Speaker 5: your manager style talking to them.
Speaker 4: I hate that vibe.
Speaker 2: You should never be on an even playing field with
Speaker 2: the waiter.
Speaker 4: You're talking up to a waiter.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, yeah, absolutely, So it holds hard to interesting observation
Speaker 2: you've made.
Speaker 4: I don't I do think.
Speaker 5: First of all, I would say the best way to
Speaker 5: get a return on this gift is potentially getting something online.
Speaker 5: That was my first thought, by something that you could
Speaker 5: send to them that would be a digital gift card,
Speaker 5: you know, like maybe maybe there's something that you can
Speaker 5: get that day that can just show up in their
Speaker 5: inbox and they can.
Speaker 2: There's nothing they can know to it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, they have something.
Speaker 5: Right, And I know gift cards feel a little impersonal,
Speaker 5: but you can get very specific with the gift card,
Speaker 5: and you can get very very very detailed. There's so
Speaker 5: many niche things for everything. So if there's some sort
Speaker 5: of mashed potato with a month club something like that,
Speaker 5: tickets to a resort, or if I bought you two
Speaker 5: tickets if there's a local mountain, if if they live
Speaker 5: by Jackson Hole to you know, you bought two ski
Speaker 5: tickets of Jackson Hole, right, you can be ready for
Speaker 5: in the winter. It would be my thought personalized.
Speaker 2: Those are very nice gifts. Yeah, and I was also
Speaker 2: while you were talking, I wasn't listening. I was thinking
Speaker 2: of my own ideas. Okay, no, that's not true. I
Speaker 2: was listen, but I was thinking. I saw a cat
Speaker 2: and then I saw gambling, and I thought, this has
Speaker 2: got to be a thing, a cat roulette table.
Speaker 4: Wouldn't that be fun.
Speaker 2: To watch a cat do the roulette?
Speaker 4: Yeah, that would be fun.
Speaker 2: That feels like a thing that could I like, if
Speaker 2: that hasn't been made already.
Speaker 5: Roulette's the ball that spins around, right, Yeah, so I
Speaker 5: don't think that cat's gonna let that bo get.
Speaker 2: All the way around, but chases it for a minute.
Speaker 4: And what number does it stop the ball on?
Speaker 2: Oh? Interesting? And is it betting? Is it red or black?
Speaker 2: Red or black and its little visor on?
Speaker 4: Or you could have an orange cat versus a black cat?
Speaker 2: Oh? Interesting? Kind of then kill each other and one.
Speaker 4: I think it's a legal cat fighting on a roulette
Speaker 4: table at this point.
Speaker 5: But I do think, I do think, And also maybe
Speaker 5: making some sort of gambling type of gift could be.
Speaker 4: Very fun where it's like open this or open this.
Speaker 2: Oh, so he has to do the gamble and then
Speaker 2: that he may end up with a bad gift.
Speaker 5: Or like I bet you one hundred dollars that you
Speaker 5: wouldn't do something, but the gift is one hundred dollars.
Speaker 4: Oh, so true something.
Speaker 5: And then I just get they think they're one against you,
Speaker 5: but actually you prepared them.
Speaker 2: Again, Well, I think we answered that perfectly.
Speaker 4: I think we did.
Speaker 5: And I would also say, let's take the attention see
Speaker 5: each other less siblings. I would say, see each other
Speaker 5: less because it feels like there's a tension.
Speaker 2: Communicate less.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you're not enjoying your company.
Speaker 5: If I'm gonna be quite honest with each other, it's
Speaker 5: I don't think that you're really embracing the fact that
Speaker 5: you are family, that you're enjoying your time together.
Speaker 4: I don't think he is.
Speaker 2: It seems I don't think either. They're both on vacation
Speaker 2: and all they're thinking about is how do I get
Speaker 2: the upper hand?
Speaker 4: Absolutely not. Look at the sunset. Oh, I have a moheito,
Speaker 4: what are you doing?
Speaker 2: Kiss? You got to do something to break the tension.
Speaker 2: Oh geez.
Speaker 4: This advice is good at one point.
Speaker 2: And obviously change your phone number. Don't let this brother
Speaker 2: get back in touch with you. This is a deadly
Speaker 2: game you're both playing. Yes, we answered the question so well.
Speaker 2: I can't believe it. This is why people write in yeah,
Speaker 2: we're saving lives.
Speaker 4: I can't believe you don't even charge for this.
Speaker 2: I'll say it, and I've said it once, and i'll
Speaker 2: say it before. No, if that's not what you say,
Speaker 2: I've said it once and i'll say it again. The
Speaker 2: heat is you know, I am sweating. I'm a force
Speaker 2: for change. You are I'm a force for change.
Speaker 4: I love that.
Speaker 2: Okay, I think This is the end of the podcast.
Speaker 4: Patrick.
Speaker 2: I've got all these delightful little shrinkets.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's what it's called, shrinky dinks, shrinking shrinky dink,
Speaker 5: shrinking d shrink its.
Speaker 4: That might be the the generic brand shrink it's.
Speaker 2: The Red Box movie version exactly so.
Speaker 5: And I did leave some of these in my hot car,
Speaker 5: so we'll see if I'm coming back to some more
Speaker 5: surprise shrinky dinks.
Speaker 4: But thank you for having me, Bridget.
Speaker 2: This was so much. I just adore you and like
Speaker 2: you as well. Hopefully the listener's not too pissed at you.
Speaker 4: I please don't be Guys, come on, he's.
Speaker 2: Got enough problems. He's got a twelve problem in this car, right.
Speaker 7: Don't remind me what am I gonna do? I live
Speaker 7: down forty stairs. How do I have not offered to
Speaker 7: help yet you won't and you absolutely won't. I actually
Speaker 7: will let me know if you need help, send a picture.
Speaker 7: We'll put it on the Instagram at some point. Okay, great,
Speaker 7: This is the end of the podcast, listener, Patrick, thank
Speaker 7: you for being here. Thank you, listener. You know I'm
Speaker 7: obviously all out of sorts. I'm saying things that make
Speaker 7: zero sense at this point, you've got to have some
Speaker 7: mercy and let me go. I'm just take your claws
Speaker 7: off of me. This is the end of the podcast.
Speaker 7: I love you goodbye.
Speaker 2: I said, No Gifts is an exactly right production. It's
Speaker 2: produced by our dear friend Annalise Nilson, and it's beautifully
Speaker 2: mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without
Speaker 2: our guest booker Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course,
Speaker 2: could only come from miracle worker Amy Mann. You must
Speaker 2: follow the show on Instagram at I said no Gifts,
Speaker 2: I don't want to hear any excuses. That's where you
Speaker 2: get to see pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting.
Speaker 2: And don't you want to see pictures of the gifts?
Speaker 1: Line?
Speaker 2: May did you hear?
Speaker 1: Thuna man? Myself perfectly clear? But you're I guessed Tom.
Speaker 1: You gotta come to me empty And I said, no, guest,
Speaker 1: your own presence is presents enough.
Speaker 3: I already had too much stuff, So how do you
Speaker 3: dare to surbey me?