Speaker 1: Welcome to Creature future production of iHeartRadio. I'm your host
Speaker 1: of Many Parasites, Katie Golden. I studied psychology and evolutionary biology,
Speaker 1: and today on the show, we're talking about some of
Speaker 1: the coolest animals you can find in US national parks.
Speaker 1: Our national parks are home to some of the most
Speaker 1: stunning species on the planet and are incredibly important reserves
Speaker 1: that protect the biological jewels of America. From adorable little
Speaker 1: cat like critters that look like they came straight out
Speaker 1: of a Miyazaki film to the goat of Horns who
Speaker 1: as spiky little guy with biological weaponry. These are just
Speaker 1: three examples of the amazing animals found in national parks.
Speaker 1: Discover this and more as we answer the age old
Speaker 1: question when is a cat not a cat? And a
Speaker 1: toad not a toad? Joining me today is stand up
Speaker 1: comedian writer and runs the Facial Recognition Comedy Show at
Speaker 1: the Comedy Shore. Comedy Shore Comedy Store. Pullavigod All and.
Speaker 2: Welcome, ohoy mate, We're at the comedy show.
Speaker 1: You're the Comedy Shore. She shells seashells by the air
Speaker 1: at the Comedy Shore.
Speaker 2: Taking a real hit. We're selling seashells now. You know,
Speaker 2: I barely know where a barely sell her.
Speaker 1: Yeah, cattlefish, I barely know a fish. This is why
Speaker 1: you do stand up and I do sit down, Eddy,
Speaker 1: sit down. Pre recorded comedy.
Speaker 2: We love it, We love all of it.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, so just for apropos of absolutely nothing. I
Speaker 1: really wanted to talk about the national parks in the
Speaker 1: the Gulf of Mexico, I mean the United States. The
Speaker 1: it is. They're like one of no joke, one of
Speaker 1: my favorite things about America. And you know they're in
Speaker 1: danger right now due to funding cuts.
Speaker 2: Due to apex predators, the white Man.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yeah, venture capitalists are going after our national parks.
Speaker 1: They are cutting staff for no apparent reason, just like
Speaker 1: n you know, you're all fired, which is very bad.
Speaker 2: I saw such a heartbreaking post from a dad who
Speaker 2: was like, what do I tell my wife as she's
Speaker 2: crying and I don't have a job, And he like
Speaker 2: the way he wrote his whole post about it was
Speaker 2: really beautiful. He was like, yeah, yeah, it's heartbreaking.
Speaker 1: And I yeah, I have a special place in my
Speaker 1: heart for park rangers. This really stings, it really sucks.
Speaker 2: They's also like a key part of Indian culture. You
Speaker 2: will not ever go to a national park and not
Speaker 2: see an auntie in a sari with sneakers on. It
Speaker 2: is very important to our culture to visit national parks,
Speaker 2: national monuments, to be tourists in all of these areas,
Speaker 2: just at the gas station nearby, heating up some food
Speaker 2: that we packed ourselves, and like experiencing being American. Like
Speaker 2: that is that's what we think America is. We all
Speaker 2: buy a grill that we never use and we visit
Speaker 2: national parks.
Speaker 1: I just don't think you're wrong. Who doesn't like who
Speaker 1: doesn't like national parks? This is the thing that gets
Speaker 1: me is I feel like everyone likes national parks. Like
Speaker 1: everyone wants to go to the Grand Canyon, everyone wants
Speaker 1: to go to Zion, to the Sequoias. It's everyone has
Speaker 1: like experience enjoying national parks. They are so in credible
Speaker 1: and amazing. And even if people are I know, like
Speaker 1: probably all my listeners care about them also because of
Speaker 1: conservation and animals. But even if you're just purely selfish,
Speaker 1: it's just they're amazing to go to and look at.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is like cartoon villain. Yeah, let's find like
Speaker 2: the things that people love the most you know, national
Speaker 2: parks flying right side up and let's take it away
Speaker 2: from them.
Speaker 1: Yeah. By the way, if any of you out there
Speaker 1: are happen to know or are park rangers, either current
Speaker 1: or former, and you would like to talk about stuff
Speaker 1: on the podcast, send me an email at Creature Feature
Speaker 1: Pod at gmail dot com. I would love to talk
Speaker 1: to you. Or if you're if you're shy, like some
Speaker 1: of the animals we're about to talk about, you can
Speaker 1: write to me and I will share your stories for sure,
Speaker 1: because I feel like this is super important. So yeah,
Speaker 1: let's let's talk about some of the amazing animal that
Speaker 1: I feel like a lot of these just are not
Speaker 1: some of them are not super well known, right, Like
Speaker 1: everyone loves a good moose, a good bear that you
Speaker 1: see at these national parks. But these guys are much
Speaker 1: more elusive or maybe less glamorous. They get there less
Speaker 1: in the spotlight. But they're really amazing. They're so cool.
Speaker 2: So the first one actors that like you see in everything,
Speaker 2: but you don't know their name, right, like those guys
Speaker 2: like that one guy the Radar exactly there is in Ghost,
Speaker 2: the Animal World.
Speaker 1: He was in Ghost and he was in another movie
Speaker 1: that guy. You know, yeah, that guy. I know what
Speaker 1: you're talking that guy, that guy. Well, so this one
Speaker 1: is amazing. So this is the ringtail cat and this
Speaker 1: is found in Zion National Park. They're also found in Oregon, California, Nevada, Colorado, Texas, Arizona,
Speaker 1: New Mexico, Oklahoma, Kansas, Baja California, and Mexico and dry
Speaker 1: arid regions and Paulavia, I sent you, I sent you
Speaker 1: a image of one of these little little guys.
Speaker 2: I got it. Also side note, my dog is partly
Speaker 2: crazy right now because the people just walk past the
Speaker 2: window and he sensed it in his crate. So he
Speaker 2: has a natural enemy of my apartment building and it's
Speaker 2: other dogs. But these do these creatures, do these beautiful
Speaker 2: cats have a natural enemy other than the president?
Speaker 1: They they do. They actually can be preyed upon by
Speaker 1: mountain lions, by by large birds of prey raptors. So
Speaker 1: they are pretty. They can be pretty solitary and elusive
Speaker 1: and shy. But they are actually even though they're called
Speaker 1: ringtail cats, and they kind of look like a cat,
Speaker 1: they look like a mix between like a cat and
Speaker 1: maybe a mouse or a ferret with a long, fluffy
Speaker 1: black and white striped tail.
Speaker 2: They're really beautiful.
Speaker 1: They're so gorgeous.
Speaker 2: They're gorgeous, and they look really sweet.
Speaker 1: They actually have a pretty nice disposition. Apparently they look
Speaker 1: a little bit like, you know, the like in the
Speaker 1: Avatar the Last Airbender cartoon, the Little guy Momo kind
Speaker 1: of looks like that.
Speaker 2: Actually, I still need to watch Avatar.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 2: Wow, its like on my list of like five no spoilers. Okay,
Speaker 2: that's on you if you speak for me. Okay, I'm
Speaker 2: still it only came out decades ago, but I'm I'm
Speaker 2: literally That's one of the things where I have this
Speaker 2: thing where I'm like, Okay, I feel like I lost
Speaker 2: parts of big American pop culture just because of my
Speaker 2: family or like what I experienced or whatever. So I
Speaker 2: have like a list of like things that I go
Speaker 2: that I'm like, Okay, I need this to relate to
Speaker 2: other people. And now that I'm thinking that, it might
Speaker 2: be neurodivergence, but I don't I don't know.
Speaker 1: If I have that, but yeah, I'm gonna use I'm
Speaker 1: going to use neurodivergence next time someone calls me out
Speaker 1: on not knowing the lyrics to a song. I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna be like, I'm neurodivergent.
Speaker 2: I gotta I don't think. I don't think that's it.
Speaker 2: I think it's like the fact that I'm like I
Speaker 2: need to like write down things to relate to people
Speaker 2: or to understand pop culture moments, like I need to
Speaker 2: consume this as as research on the human subject, like
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 1: I am. I am going to use it as an excuse.
Speaker 1: So I already use it as an excuse for parking
Speaker 1: bad because I did read a study about people with
Speaker 1: OCD not having as good spatial awareness. I do have OCD,
Speaker 1: and so it's sorry.
Speaker 2: I mean, it's not cool, but it's like to learn
Speaker 2: about you.
Speaker 1: It's very cool now. It wasn't cool when it was untreated,
Speaker 1: but now it's it's a it's doing good. It gives
Speaker 1: me a good excuse to like run into polls. But so,
Speaker 1: the the ringtail cat, the cat back to the cat
Speaker 1: actually not a cat, which you know, I could make
Speaker 1: a joke about that driving my OCD crazy, but that's
Speaker 1: not how it works. So the ringtail cats are not cats.
Speaker 1: They're actually related to raccoons. Kuwaitis kinkajews and they're in
Speaker 1: the Procyoniday family. So yeah, they're related to raccoons, not
Speaker 1: not felines.
Speaker 2: They look like a little raccoon ish liketit. The hands,
Speaker 2: you gotta get the little hands like yeah, those rifle
Speaker 2: through trash, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: They do have very agile little hands. They they're actually
Speaker 1: their ankles can rotate one hundred and eighty degrees. What
Speaker 1: they can clime trees, they.
Speaker 2: Can be They're like exorcist hands.
Speaker 1: They're kind of exorcist hands. Yeah, so technically the exorcist
Speaker 1: doesn't isn't that three hundred and sixty degrees because.
Speaker 2: It's all one hundred and eighty So it's not Although
Speaker 2: they could I.
Speaker 1: Think that means that they could open doors. So don't
Speaker 1: get on you know, don't get on their bad.
Speaker 2: Side, you know, honestly, it's our fault for inventing doors.
Speaker 1: Well, it is our fault for inventing doors. I would
Speaker 1: want there to be a B and E with one
Speaker 1: of these little guys, one of these green tail cats,
Speaker 1: because they're super cute, steal all my stuff. They actually
Speaker 1: they have a little imask going on, but instead of
Speaker 1: it being a black I mask like with raccoons, it's
Speaker 1: a white ie mask and it's kind of converted.
Speaker 2: The striping looks like raccoons. It does all making so
Speaker 2: much sense.
Speaker 1: Yes, they're extremely cute. They weigh only around one to
Speaker 1: three pounds, that's only up to one and a half kilograms.
Speaker 1: Their tails are as long as their bodies, if not longer,
Speaker 1: so about a foot long or a little longer.
Speaker 2: I know your audience is like, not the people I'm
Speaker 2: talking about, and I know this is to like educate
Speaker 2: people so that they value national parks. But I'm like
Speaker 2: part of me with how cute these guys are, and
Speaker 2: you're saying like they're more docile than other animals, I'm like,
Speaker 2: we need to gate keep these because people are just
Speaker 2: gonna go and mess with them, do you know what
Speaker 2: I mean. I'm like, fortunately said those things. I was like,
Speaker 2: let's protect them.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Fortunately they're very shy and elusive, so they they're
Speaker 1: actually relatively understudied because they managed to be very solitary.
Speaker 1: But in terms of in terms of like people trying
Speaker 1: to turn them into pets, I don't think they're a
Speaker 1: big part of the pet trade right now. They might
Speaker 1: be a bit. I think they can sometimes be victims
Speaker 1: of the pet trade, which is not good. But they
Speaker 1: were like, there was an interesting situation which was like
Speaker 1: for miners like gold miners and other types of or
Speaker 1: or minors not under eighteen, not a minor, no, no, exactly.
Speaker 1: Not people who cannot order or drink at a bar legally,
Speaker 1: but people who go in these can't.
Speaker 2: No, I'm kidding.
Speaker 1: These probably would love to drink some alcohol. They are omnivorous,
Speaker 1: so they will eat or drink about anything they can
Speaker 1: get their little pause on. But miners, gold miners, other
Speaker 1: ore miners. I don't really know mining history in the
Speaker 1: US except for gold mining because I lived in California
Speaker 1: and our school system was like you're learning about gold.
Speaker 1: But yeah, they would actually kind of quasi tame them,
Speaker 1: so they would keep them near their camps and feed
Speaker 1: them little pieces of food, and then they would hang
Speaker 1: out in these mining camps and then like kill the
Speaker 1: mice and the rats and eat them, and so they
Speaker 1: kind of kept them like housecats. But the key thing
Speaker 1: there was that because these were mining camps out in
Speaker 1: the wild, right, they basically were allowed to roam around that.
Speaker 1: It's not so much that they kept them in cages
Speaker 1: or anything like that.
Speaker 2: So they would just have like little hats with flashlights
Speaker 2: on them. Yes, okay, I'm so little.
Speaker 1: Overalls where one of the straps is kind of falling
Speaker 1: off their shoulder and the little little you know, a
Speaker 1: little bit. It's very cute. It's extremely cute. There. Arboreal
Speaker 1: meaning they spend most of their time in trees. Uh,
Speaker 1: and they are very adept climbers. Like I mentioned before,
Speaker 1: they can climb trees really well. They can also climb
Speaker 1: vertical rock walls, and they know how to climb up
Speaker 1: a cactus without getting stuck with the thors. And they'll
Speaker 1: happily eat prickly pear fruits.
Speaker 2: So they are amazing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're they're very they're very efficient in these like
Speaker 1: are desert regions. If you're wondering what they sound like,
Speaker 1: what's the matter?
Speaker 2: Under distress?
Speaker 1: He's he's fine. He's like on a roof someone's roof
Speaker 1: and the person's like looking up at him and he's
Speaker 1: kind of barking.
Speaker 2: So you know, he's the one who's like, where you're going, buddy,
Speaker 2: that's the that's.
Speaker 1: The retail cago Like, where are you going? Buddy? Hey?
Speaker 1: Hey are you going?
Speaker 2: I got just some gold again.
Speaker 1: So yeah, because of what I told you about them
Speaker 1: having been sort of tamed by miners. They're also called
Speaker 1: miners cats, and again, I'm really cute. I must emphasize
Speaker 1: they are not cats, but yeah, they apparently had a
Speaker 1: somewhat tamable disposition when they were bribed. But again, they
Speaker 1: wouldn't make good pets in a domestic environment because they
Speaker 1: need a lot of space. They're not super social animals either, Like,
Speaker 1: they don't hang out with each other all that often.
Speaker 1: They mostly hang out, uh, to groom each other or
Speaker 1: to mate.
Speaker 2: I feel I was until you said that last part.
Speaker 2: I was like, I feel like in another life, I
Speaker 2: would have been one of these guys. And then you
Speaker 2: were like they each other and mate. I'm like, I'm
Speaker 2: not cleaning somebody else. I'm all alone most of the time.
Speaker 2: And then I just go clean somebody else. No, thank you.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, I guess I'm I kind of like
Speaker 1: that idea, just like hanging out eating, eating random stuff
Speaker 1: and then getting your hair brushed by buddy.
Speaker 2: It's like going to the salon for your Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: I I'm one of I'm one of those freaks who
Speaker 1: enjoys going to get my haircut because of the because
Speaker 1: of the shampooing. Oh yeah. Yeah, I'm one of.
Speaker 2: Those sometimes you need somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it, it is. It's like, it's obviously
Speaker 1: I can shampoo my own hair.
Speaker 2: But whoa, whoa, whoa.
Speaker 1: But stand when I have to get my hair cut
Speaker 1: and they're like shampooing it. I'm like, you know, I
Speaker 1: didn't realize how much better other people are at shampooing hair.
Speaker 2: The angles, it's the angles, and then they use more
Speaker 2: of their arm strength, right, you know, it's like a massage.
Speaker 2: It's weird.
Speaker 1: It's like they're ripping off parts of my scalp, but
Speaker 1: in a good way and I like it.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So anyways, uh yeah, so they're uh, there have been.
Speaker 1: Because they're so secretive. It's a little bit hard to
Speaker 1: know too much about them because they they are elusive.
Speaker 1: But there have been some more recent studies that aim
Speaker 1: to learn more about them, including a collaboration between Oregon
Speaker 1: State University, the hoop Up Valley Tribe, Penn State, and
Speaker 1: cow Poly Humboldt. And some of the newer information that
Speaker 1: they have about them is how they carefully select tree
Speaker 1: hollows from older trees to take naps in uh to
Speaker 1: stay safe from bad weather. And to occasionally groom each other.
Speaker 1: They're cute. Yeah, it's very cute. They also sometimes make
Speaker 1: their homes and abandoned mine shafts, which is it's like
Speaker 1: they're not they're not acts, they're not beating the little
Speaker 1: the cobald hobgoblin allegations. Oh my god. So yeah, because
Speaker 1: because they're so dependent on trees, loss of habitats such
Speaker 1: as old growth oak woodlands would threaten their population. Apparently,
Speaker 1: this past year in Arizona, ringtails have been rescued at
Speaker 1: higher rates due to suburban sprawl and hot weather. Because
Speaker 1: they like nooks and crannies and trees, they'll sometimes try
Speaker 1: to find the same resources in human structures, so they'll
Speaker 1: get stuck in our attics, our walls, plumbing, our cars.
Speaker 1: There's this article at kj's ez Phoenix with a photo
Speaker 1: of the saddest little ringtail I've ever seen. He's damp
Speaker 1: from being bathed a bunch of times because he got
Speaker 1: stuck in a tortilla factory's oil transfer to No. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's just try and get some tortillas. He gots stuck.
Speaker 2: He's so cute.
Speaker 1: He's so cute. Apparently it was pretty touch and go
Speaker 1: with him. He did survive, but they're like, yeah he has.
Speaker 1: He was covered in tortilla grease and poor.
Speaker 2: Okay you you and me too, brother, Okay. Some days
Speaker 2: it's just like that, all right, and just.
Speaker 1: You know, yeah, I mean it's it's very cute and
Speaker 1: it's a very sad, funny little story and it's it's
Speaker 1: it's good because it had a good ending because he
Speaker 1: did get rescued, but it is it does emphasize the
Speaker 1: importance that they keep their habitat because they just they
Speaker 1: they they like go on a tube, right, thinking it's
Speaker 1: gonna be a tree, and then it's full of tortilla grease, delicious,
Speaker 1: deadly tortilla grease.
Speaker 2: I worry, but I want your perspective. But I worry
Speaker 2: about this so much. Like I've been seeing coyote coyotes
Speaker 2: or yeah, coyotes in my neighborhood more, and I feel
Speaker 2: like they're that urban sprawl thing where we're just like
Speaker 2: impeding on their environment, is like really messing them up,
Speaker 2: like and that's for sure for our pets. Like no,
Speaker 2: I'm so worried about it.
Speaker 1: It's it's very concerning, yeah, for sure. Like one of
Speaker 1: the like coyotes are much more likely to go after
Speaker 1: your pets, your little dogs or cats when they are
Speaker 1: when they're when they don't have enough sort of ample
Speaker 1: resources in their own habitat, enough rabbits and other rodents
Speaker 1: to feed on, and then they'll come in and then
Speaker 1: people like really hate them. But they're just you know,
Speaker 1: they're just trying to they're just trying to live. They
Speaker 1: don't they don't.
Speaker 2: Make it in the city like the rest of us Acholizin,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 1: They don't. I know that all one eating a beloved pet.
Speaker 2: I saw one go after a cat. It didn't get it,
Speaker 2: but I was like, we gotta get these cats off
Speaker 2: the streets. And these coyotes, yeah, after their environment, Like
Speaker 2: what is going on?
Speaker 1: If coyotes live around you or birds, it's probably a
Speaker 1: good idea to keep the kitties inside. I'm gonna say, hot, Yeah,
Speaker 1: kitties they will be you can entertain them with attention.
Speaker 1: They they will survive.
Speaker 2: Also, like the you know how we're always like, oh,
Speaker 2: humans weren't meant to see the Internet, Like our brains
Speaker 2: aren't meant for this. I don't think the things that
Speaker 2: we've done to animals, like the animals' brains aren't meant
Speaker 2: to meet each other, you know, like like some of
Speaker 2: these creatures are not meant to interact ever, and they do,
Speaker 2: and they're like, do I eat this?
Speaker 1: What is this? You know? Yeah? Crazy? No, absolutely, And
Speaker 1: I mean obviously it also increases chance of zoonotic diseases
Speaker 1: jumping from species to species. Yet it's very it's incredibly
Speaker 1: important to maintain and preserve the habitats of these animals both.
Speaker 1: I mean there's a lot of reasons. Number one, they
Speaker 1: are devastatingly cute. Look this little guy and the eyes all.
Speaker 1: I'll provide the pictures in the show, the little one
Speaker 1: that got stuck in the tortilla factory grease trap, Like
Speaker 1: he's so sad.
Speaker 2: And makes his eyes look bigger. Yeah, boots picture where
Speaker 2: like they z into the eyes.
Speaker 1: Sorry this out. Send it to your congress person and say, really,
Speaker 1: we're getting rid of National Park staff when these little
Speaker 1: guys are getting stuck in tortilla factories.
Speaker 2: But it's the congress people will immediately try to make
Speaker 2: them pets. I'm just like so cynical.
Speaker 1: I thought you were gonna say, like Corrolla de Ville
Speaker 1: style like that.
Speaker 2: Too is going to walk around with these fringing boots
Speaker 2: on with these tails just.
Speaker 1: Like just like a oh god, yeah, you know, well
Speaker 1: they're ghoules, but hey, there are still good people out
Speaker 1: there rescuing these these little ringtail cats from tortilla factories.
Speaker 1: So we're going to take a quick break and when
Speaker 1: we get back, we're going to talk about another fantastic
Speaker 1: animal that you can find in the national parks. So
Speaker 1: pull a b We're talking about big horn and thin
Speaker 1: horn sheep. Uh. These are one of the bigger animals
Speaker 1: that you can find in North American national parks, and
Speaker 1: they are pretty incredible. So there are two species of
Speaker 1: mountain sheep, the big horn sheep and then the thin
Speaker 1: horn or doll sheep, and they're both really beautiful animals.
Speaker 2: So majestic.
Speaker 1: They are so majestic that they're they're like very iconic.
Speaker 1: The big horn sheep have the males have these incredible,
Speaker 1: like what do you think horns on their heads that
Speaker 1: are massive and heavy. So, uh, first I'll talk a
Speaker 1: little bit about the doll sheep. They are found in
Speaker 1: the Dnali National Park in the US. They're also found
Speaker 1: in Canada and Nali.
Speaker 2: Yeah, keeping the name.
Speaker 1: You know what, I have a very selfishly sentimental connection
Speaker 1: to the name Danali, which is this is this is
Speaker 1: super like when I was a little kid, there was
Speaker 1: an ice cream called Denali. I was like, why is
Speaker 1: it called Denali? Because it was super good? And then
Speaker 1: I like looked up it was like, oh, it's like
Speaker 1: named after these beautiful mountains, and it was just like
Speaker 1: and then so I would like imagine that I was
Speaker 1: like in the mountains eating this ice cream. So it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, you will pry that name out of my
Speaker 1: cold dead hands. Also because it's you know, it's grotesque
Speaker 1: to try to rename it, uh, because that's that's the
Speaker 1: original name.
Speaker 2: And from I know, you're not gonna eat McKinley ice cream. Ew,
Speaker 2: that's not disgusting. It tastes like cardboard.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's like it's just got like little shriveled cherries
Speaker 1: in it and nonsense and whole peanuts with the shells on.
Speaker 1: It's discussed. Oh my god, Yeah, McKinley ice cream ice cream? No, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: So it's not in National Park. They're also found in Canada, Alaska,
Speaker 1: and they tend to be in the sort of more
Speaker 1: old regions, although big horn sheep also can survive in
Speaker 1: the cold, and they can have their coat can change
Speaker 1: from being very thin to being fluffy depending on seasonal changes.
Speaker 1: Big horn sheep are found in a variety of national parks,
Speaker 1: such as Yellowstone in Wyoming, Montana, and Idaho. They're found
Speaker 1: in Zion National Park in Utah. They're found in the
Speaker 1: Oehe Canyonlands in Idaho and Oregon, in Hell's Canyon in Washington,
Speaker 1: Oregon and Idaho, in the bad Lands National Park in
Speaker 1: South Dakota, in the Desert National Wildlife Refuge in Nevada,
Speaker 1: which was specifically created to protect big horn sheep, and
Speaker 1: they're also found in Mueller Ranch in Colorado. You can
Speaker 1: even find a desert big horn sheep in the Sierras
Speaker 1: in California. These are just super They're iconic for America.
Speaker 1: They're found everywhere in these national park.
Speaker 2: I one thousand percent get why people would worship like
Speaker 2: a like a goat looking god, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: They're so impressive, they're so majestic.
Speaker 1: They look like they have seen the universe, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. Then those weird little eyes of theirs.
Speaker 2: And then it looks like their horns like have their
Speaker 2: like their intelligence stored in them.
Speaker 1: You know, yes, they do have a little bit of
Speaker 1: the It almost kind of looks like the Twilight's from
Speaker 1: Star Wars, you know what I mean. I think that's
Speaker 1: what they're named, the ones with things that Ye Anyway.
Speaker 2: That's probably where they got it from with these guys,
Speaker 2: because they were everywhere.
Speaker 1: I think the bighorn sheep might be getting sued by
Speaker 1: Disney pretty soon here.
Speaker 2: Uh, probably we've got to protect bighorn sheep from little
Speaker 2: litigationious Disney.
Speaker 1: So bighorn sheep are related to sheep and goats and
Speaker 1: thank god, yeah this is I tossed in two animals
Speaker 1: or who have deceptive names, but this one, fortunately the
Speaker 1: name does fit. So a male's horns are roughly ten
Speaker 1: percent of their body weight, okay, and they weigh over
Speaker 1: three hundred pounds or about that's the whole sheet. Not
Speaker 1: that the horns aren't three hundred pounds yeah, yeah, that
Speaker 1: would be incredible shit. But apparently their horns weigh as
Speaker 1: much as all their other bones combined, like their entire skeleton.
Speaker 2: That is crazy.
Speaker 1: So it's like imagine like wearing a whole other your
Speaker 1: skeleton on your head.
Speaker 2: This feels like a kim Kardashian level of uncomfortable outfit
Speaker 2: at the met gala. You know what I mean. Yeah,
Speaker 2: Like these guys are really putting everything into their horns.
Speaker 2: They don't care how uncomfortable it is to carry them.
Speaker 2: They're all about it.
Speaker 1: I do actually like wearing a head piece that's an
Speaker 1: entire human skeleton would be kind of dope, like, especially if.
Speaker 2: That would actually be more Lady Gaga I think, right anybody.
Speaker 1: Especially if it's like modeled after your own skeleton. That's
Speaker 1: like a real like fierce memento moriy, like really owning it,
Speaker 1: like look what's inside, This is what's inside me, and
Speaker 1: I'm wearing it on my head. Anyways, youse also have horns,
Speaker 1: so use our female big horn sheep.
Speaker 2: But they're sure that you were just getting into like
Speaker 2: an accent. Like youse also have hornsuse.
Speaker 1: Guys, I'm just a mobster from Chicago. Uh No, they
Speaker 1: also have horns, but they're they're smaller and thinner. The
Speaker 1: reason males have the giant horns sexus. It's sexism for sure.
Speaker 1: It's literally sexual selection. The females are attracted to the
Speaker 1: big horns, and also they use them in contests with
Speaker 1: other males to fight for the right to mate, so
Speaker 1: they'll like, you know, bonk each other with the horns.
Speaker 2: Or just human males should also hit each other in
Speaker 2: the head.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what, like just run out each other
Speaker 1: and just massive head bonk uh and and we'll like
Speaker 1: flutter our little fans and like judge you uh I
Speaker 1: like that idea. So uh yeah, they're very They're adept climbers.
Speaker 1: They can scale relatively sheer cliff faces, allowing them to
Speaker 1: escape predator. They're very agile for being such big animals
Speaker 1: and so top heavy. They are surprisingly very very adept,
Speaker 1: very graystile climbers.
Speaker 2: Are these like the ones that you see at like
Speaker 2: the Hoover Dam, just like scaling like the side of
Speaker 2: the or those like goats.
Speaker 1: Those might be mountain goats, but let me check Hoover Dam.
Speaker 2: I don't know if it's like the Hoover you know
Speaker 2: what I mean, like they.
Speaker 1: Close a mountains, those are those are goat? I believe
Speaker 1: those are mountain goats or let me dam Hoover Yeah,
Speaker 1: I know, I like them. Uh, but yeah, mountain goats
Speaker 1: at the Hoover Dam. That's that might be what those are,
Speaker 1: but there might be but yeah, bighorn sheep are near
Speaker 1: the Hoover Dam. You might see them near there. They
Speaker 1: might scale it a little bit, but the ones that
Speaker 1: can really like get up a dam like get Like.
Speaker 1: Mountain goats are actually really cool. They're related to big
Speaker 1: horn sheep. But mountain goats are not just good climbers.
Speaker 1: They seem to defy gravity. They can hook onto nearly
Speaker 1: completely vertical sheer cliff faces, and their little hooves just
Speaker 1: like fit right on there, and it is it is incredible.
Speaker 2: I think the impressive part is that they aren't scared,
Speaker 2: because I would be like, I would be the mountain
Speaker 2: goat that's like shaking up there. I'd be like, oh,
Speaker 2: you guys, But all of them are just like munching
Speaker 2: on food.
Speaker 1: It helps to have a small brain. I think, like
Speaker 1: when you have a brain that's big enough to contemplate
Speaker 1: sort of physics, like you start to get worried. But
Speaker 1: then when you're when you have mountain goat brain and
Speaker 1: you're like, I see grass up there, do do do?
Speaker 1: Do do do, and then you just don't think about
Speaker 1: sort of the wid like it's like the wily kayote thing,
Speaker 1: like yeah, wiley coyote where It's like, if you don't
Speaker 1: look down and you don't realize you're supposed to fall,
Speaker 1: physics just bends to your stupid will. So that's that,
Speaker 1: I know. That's I always whenever I saw the wily
Speaker 1: coyote thing, it's like, well, if he just like keeps
Speaker 1: thinking he won't fall, then he won't fall.
Speaker 2: So, oh my god, that's such a wonderful moral that
Speaker 2: coyote taught children.
Speaker 1: Right, I used to. I tried the wily coyote thing.
Speaker 1: I thought if I like jumped off of like uh
Speaker 1: the like stairsteps and but didn't look down, maybe I
Speaker 1: would have her in mid air. But it didn't work.
Speaker 1: I try to find gravity, Oh boy. I also tried
Speaker 1: to hold an umbrella up and see if that would
Speaker 1: help me slow down, but it didn't do.
Speaker 2: You know what, the most cartoonish thing I ever did.
Speaker 2: I was born in Texas and we.
Speaker 1: Had already pretty cartoonish but go.
Speaker 2: Pretty cartoonish, I know, but we had these like big
Speaker 2: fields up front, like I have just like the weirdest memory.
Speaker 2: I was literally like two probably, so it's like probably
Speaker 2: one of my first memories. And like me and my
Speaker 2: brother and the neighbor kids we would take like like
Speaker 2: flat cardboard boxes and hold them up above our heads
Speaker 2: to get make the wind pick us up yep, and
Speaker 2: like I would. I was the one who would fly
Speaker 2: the farthest because I was the smallest one. I was
Speaker 2: like literally too, I was like, that is That's the
Speaker 2: most cartoonish shit I've ever done.
Speaker 1: That's amazing. I would give anything to see a two
Speaker 1: year old just getting launched into the air by cardboard.
Speaker 1: I know that sounds you got some sick air, and
Speaker 1: that sounds amazing. So yeah, bighorn sheep teach us a
Speaker 1: lot about the importance of conservation. They almost died out
Speaker 1: completely in the nineteen hundreds due to over hunting and disease.
Speaker 1: Their populations dwindled to just like around one thousand, but
Speaker 1: they made a miraculous comeback did to the national park
Speaker 1: system and conservation efforts, and now big horn sheep populations
Speaker 1: are used as signals for the overall health of the environment.
Speaker 1: They're highly responses. They're highly responsive to environmental changes such
Speaker 1: as like say, if you have too much fire suppression,
Speaker 1: say in a national park, not enough wildfires, they actually
Speaker 1: get preyed upon more because you have more bushy scrub
Speaker 1: that predators like bears, wolves or mountain lions can use
Speaker 1: as coverage to ambush the bighorn sheep. So it's really interesting.
Speaker 2: I also use bushy scrub as coverage. Okay, whoa, whoa,
Speaker 2: whoa cooglar over here?
Speaker 1: Meow? All right? Well side uh the yes angela Mrkin
Speaker 1: the former German chancellor uh merkele uh uh so yeah,
Speaker 1: so it shows how the there's a delicate balance, right, Like,
Speaker 1: so sometimes we use fire suppression tactics, right because hey,
Speaker 1: you don't want stuff to be on fire, But then
Speaker 1: when you do it too much, then you have overgrowth
Speaker 1: of scrub, and then that affects the population of these
Speaker 1: bighorn sheep because predators have more spots to hideen. Conversely,
Speaker 1: if you have too much fire, then predators don't have
Speaker 1: enough spots to hiden, and then the predators suffer. Right,
Speaker 1: It's not all about like thwarting the predators. The predator's
Speaker 1: populations are super important as well.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't want no scrubs because a scrub
Speaker 2: is a guy, get no love for me. So I
Speaker 2: feel like those are predators, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go, there you go. So uh yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean it is. It's really important. Also, the thin
Speaker 1: horn sheep that I mentioned earlier also an indicator species
Speaker 1: because they live in colder climates, like in high altitudes.
Speaker 1: Climate change affects colder climates pretty significantly because you suddenly
Speaker 1: get these big shifts and vegetation. So the behavior and
Speaker 1: population changes in thin horn sheep are indicators of overall
Speaker 1: environmental health. So they're called an indicator species. Really important
Speaker 1: to track them, and in order to track them you
Speaker 1: need staff at national parks. So yeah, I think it's
Speaker 1: just like in the same way that I'm going to do.
Speaker 1: I promise you this is a metaphor that makes sense
Speaker 1: in the same way that like we have to I'm
Speaker 1: here for now. Now I don't write opinion columns for
Speaker 1: The New York Times. My metaphors make sense. But the
Speaker 1: way in which like our environment works, right, Like if
Speaker 1: you pull out a species or or affect a population
Speaker 1: and then it has this Janga tower effect of like
Speaker 1: affecting everything in that chain. Like it's a similar situation
Speaker 1: with the way that like, okay, if you just fire
Speaker 1: a bunch of park rangers, you know, without thought, without
Speaker 1: any I mean, you should never just fire a bunch
Speaker 1: of park rangers because they're awesome, but also like all
Speaker 1: the things that they do, all the all the important
Speaker 1: functions that they do to like keep uh, the national
Speaker 1: parks functioning. It's we're probably not gonna like immediately see
Speaker 1: the impacts, but we're gonna see them, and they will
Speaker 1: not be good in the same way that say, like
Speaker 1: if you if there's too much wildfire or too little wildfire,
Speaker 1: you'll see these like fluctuations or population crashes happening in
Speaker 1: these these magnificent animals. So you know, that's that's my metaphor.
Speaker 1: The the ecosystem of animals is similar to the ecosystem
Speaker 1: of federal workers, and I am very concerned about it.
Speaker 2: It's also a thing where like you don't see the
Speaker 2: effects right away, so then people will blame like if
Speaker 2: there is an next administration, a next administration, rather than
Speaker 2: like realizing that cause and effect takes it like a minute.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it's it really frustrates me. It's
Speaker 1: it's very infuriating. But yeah, uh, you know, maybe we
Speaker 1: should take the a key a que a clue. Maybe
Speaker 1: we should take advice from the big horn sheep and
Speaker 1: just grow massive horns. On our head and start headbutting everyone.
Speaker 1: We're going to take a quick break, and when we
Speaker 1: get back, we're going to talk about a little critter
Speaker 1: who has a bioweapon. All right, So, uh, I don't
Speaker 1: want to cause the United States to try to do
Speaker 1: an invasion of national parks. However, it is true that
Speaker 1: there is an animal that does have a bioweapon.
Speaker 2: It's me, Twist, it's me quick, tell the FBI ah
Speaker 2: on my phone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh he's been fired. So you know the horn
Speaker 1: lizard also known as the horny toad, which is a
Speaker 1: pretty bad name. Yeah, they're not toads, so they're not.
Speaker 2: The whole time, I thought they were two different First
Speaker 2: I thought they were two different things. No, and then
Speaker 2: so they named Okay, is it scientists naming these things
Speaker 2: because we have to do better? To do better?
Speaker 1: I mean, I think scientists named them horned lizard to
Speaker 1: clarify it. But they used to be called horny toads
Speaker 1: because people didn't know the difference.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I think we need to take the ornithologists
Speaker 2: that study birds. We need to take the people, and
Speaker 2: we need them to start naming the other animals because
Speaker 2: today we had so many misnomers and the horny bird
Speaker 2: people they like they'll name they'll be like the big
Speaker 2: breasted tint, you know what I mean, Like they'll just
Speaker 2: make a hornyird.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it.
Speaker 2: Looks like that, you know what I mean. Like I mean, these.
Speaker 1: Are these are literally horned lizards, so getting some hornybird
Speaker 1: people on it would probably be helpful. So horned lizards
Speaker 1: are found in Mexico and North America. They are a
Speaker 1: genus of lizards with about twenty one species, fifteen of
Speaker 1: which are found in the US, and are a common
Speaker 1: sight in Well. They're a little elusive, but they can
Speaker 1: be found in many national parks, such as Bryce Canyon,
Speaker 1: UH and Arizona's Petrified Forest National Park.
Speaker 2: They are so scared. It's so scared of being cut.
Speaker 1: Look at that liard, it's got too many angles.
Speaker 2: Bring our parks back, please.
Speaker 1: So horned lizards are spikey. They range from a grayish
Speaker 1: gravel color to a tan color depending on their habitat.
Speaker 1: They're really really cool looking. They're very They've got these
Speaker 1: wicked looking spikes. They kind of look like tiny dragons,
Speaker 1: but they're actually harmless. They don't have any venom. Their
Speaker 1: main defense is staying still and hoping nobody notices them,
Speaker 1: which is.
Speaker 2: My favorite tack in the green room of a comedy clubs.
Speaker 1: Exactly like whenever I go to a party and it's
Speaker 1: like like I know one person there and then they
Speaker 1: freaking abandon me. They're like, oh, come to this right
Speaker 1: and then I go there and then they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go talk to this person. It's like you
Speaker 1: you brought me here. I am like your baby right now,
Speaker 1: you abandoned me.
Speaker 2: Parties. Parties are meant to like bring someone to talk
Speaker 2: to one person.
Speaker 1: Yes, that was my understanding. This is why I agreed
Speaker 1: to come. I was gonna be I was basically going
Speaker 1: to be like a little puppy and follow you around
Speaker 1: and have you introduced me to people.
Speaker 2: This is why every party should have one dog. Okay,
Speaker 2: so that for people like us who just want to
Speaker 2: talk to the dog.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, oh is this your dog, I'm gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna form a connection with them because uh yeah. That
Speaker 1: My problem is not that I I'm actually I quite
Speaker 1: like people and I like meeting people. It is the
Speaker 1: thing of like when two people are talking, is when
Speaker 1: do I When do I approach and do I stand there,
Speaker 1: and when do I start laughing at what they're saying.
Speaker 1: I don't know if no one's ever taught me that.
Speaker 2: Do you remember how we talked about neurodivergence earlier in I.
Speaker 1: Don't see how this. I'm not sure. I don't I
Speaker 1: don't understand what point.
Speaker 2: I also, also, this is a tip. I just started
Speaker 2: inserting myself into conversations and being like, hey, I'm just
Speaker 2: gonna be in this conversation now and then. Yeah, people
Speaker 2: are generally welcoming and if they're not, well, yeah, there's
Speaker 2: always roasting them.
Speaker 1: Or you can take a page from the horned lizard's
Speaker 1: book and inflate your body to look big and scary
Speaker 1: despite only being about the size of an adult human's palm,
Speaker 1: so they will, yeah, just like, oh you won't talk
Speaker 1: to me, raw, no big ignore.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I would love to do that, Oh
Speaker 2: my god. Yeah amazing.
Speaker 1: Also, if that fails, there are eight species of horned
Speaker 1: lizards who will have a special extra technique, and that
Speaker 1: is that they squirt blood out of their eye sockets.
Speaker 2: Okay, when you said out of the eyes, I do
Speaker 2: squirt blood, but not out of there. So yeah, when
Speaker 2: I am disruped.
Speaker 1: It sounds like it's still it still sounds pretty skilled.
Speaker 1: But yeah, they will block the blood flow in their
Speaker 1: head and then force it through ruptured vessels around their
Speaker 1: eyelids at high pressures, allowing them to allowing them to
Speaker 1: shoot jets of blood up to five feet or one
Speaker 1: and a half meters away.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say this, This might be a stretch, but
Speaker 2: I do think they're a little bit more anti social
Speaker 2: than you. Honestly, he knows, just a dad, but I
Speaker 2: think they're beating you on this.
Speaker 1: I if I was able to shoot jets of blood
Speaker 1: out of my eyes, I might have never been forced
Speaker 1: to learn to be more gregarious, because, man, can you
Speaker 1: like every awkward social interaction you're just like, well, you know,
Speaker 1: it's like an Irish goodbye, but a lot more cleaning involved.
Speaker 2: I like the idea of like, oh my god, Katie
Speaker 2: just spewed again.
Speaker 1: Not again.
Speaker 2: Kay, You're like, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do it.
Speaker 1: Yeah. It's a way to startle predators, and it has
Speaker 1: a nasty taste and smell that certain predators don't like.
Speaker 1: They these this is the.
Speaker 2: Freak predators that like it.
Speaker 1: Birds apparently don't care. Apparently, like wrap will they do?
Speaker 1: Birds are?
Speaker 2: They're us like the scientists that name them there freaks.
Speaker 1: They're a little freaks. They they don't really care. They
Speaker 1: they don't have a good sense of smell. So when
Speaker 1: the if they try to get spray a predatory bird
Speaker 1: with this business, they're just like, oh season like sauce. Yeah,
Speaker 1: sauce scha nice? Uh So yeah, they the horned lizards
Speaker 1: have a diet of harvester ants which are somewhat toxic.
Speaker 1: Uh And it's thought that possibly that diet might help
Speaker 1: their blood taste worse. So yeah, it's it's like basically
Speaker 1: squirting a hot sauce out of your eyes that's made
Speaker 1: out of your blood, which you know, that's I think that.
Speaker 1: Did you ever have one of those kids in your
Speaker 1: class where they were able to like manipulate their the
Speaker 1: the tear ducts in their eyes and like squirt water
Speaker 1: out of their eye?
Speaker 2: No, I thought you were gonna say, gleeking like with
Speaker 2: the saliva thing.
Speaker 1: I've seen that. Yeah, there's a kid. I think I
Speaker 1: did both of it, and it was.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I've never heard of that before.
Speaker 1: It was gross. I didn't like it or the kid
Speaker 1: that could like turn their eyelids inside out.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, there was that kid.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, a lot of Honestly, we don't talk.
Speaker 2: Enough about body horror in elementary schools.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of stuff that I made
Speaker 1: me not want to go to school, like people squirting
Speaker 1: fluids out of their faces, like you know, I feel
Speaker 1: like that's not a conducive environment to learn about the
Speaker 1: American Civil War. So another aspect of the horned lizards
Speaker 1: is that they have scales that are highly not just
Speaker 1: the spiked ones, but they have these very tiny scales
Speaker 1: that form these micro channels that help wick moisture from
Speaker 1: the air and funnel it into their mouth. It's such
Speaker 1: a yeah, it's such an ingenious design that scientists are
Speaker 1: trying to replicate artificial versions, which could help in a
Speaker 1: lot of applications. It could be like anything from like
Speaker 1: water collection systems like to breweries. I don't really know
Speaker 1: how a brewery would use this, but breweries you probably know,
Speaker 1: or reducing condensation in medical devices, so like making it
Speaker 1: easier to make beer or medical devices. It a win
Speaker 1: wind to help after you drink like a lot of beer,
Speaker 1: right right, Like drink a lot of beer and then
Speaker 1: you can have an artificial kidney. But yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: their ability, these lizards ability to use water in their
Speaker 1: bodies is so efficient. They don't have a separate urinary bladder.
Speaker 1: They only expel waste in their feces, Like they don't
Speaker 1: need to peek because they just use water so good.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I mean they're squirting it out of
Speaker 2: their blood eyes. But like, yeah, that's very efficient.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it's absolutely incredible. And again it.
Speaker 2: Would save me at least three hours a day if
Speaker 2: I could.
Speaker 1: We can research these guys figure out how not to pee.
Speaker 1: I mean again, like this is there. There's a concept
Speaker 1: which is that like with animals, because they are the
Speaker 1: products of millions of years of evolution, they contain a
Speaker 1: lot of information. And I obviously, if you've made it
Speaker 1: this far in the podcast, you just love animals, so
Speaker 1: you don't need another reason to want to protect them.
Speaker 2: Or it also contains a lot of information, so that's
Speaker 2: why they listened.
Speaker 1: That's true, so that they're trying to write down like,
Speaker 1: all right, which animals do we gotta gotta exploit? H No,
Speaker 1: But it's it's a it is a it's like there's
Speaker 1: a library of potential information. Right, So, like, if animals
Speaker 1: go extinct and or we lose them, or we aren't
Speaker 1: able to, you know, research them because we've laid off
Speaker 1: everyone who might be able to research them, we lose
Speaker 1: so much information that can very selfishly help humanity, right. Like,
Speaker 1: There's a a great example of this is there's this
Speaker 1: frog called the gastric brooding frog, and they would keep
Speaker 1: their offspring in their gut like in their stomachs, and
Speaker 1: somehow their digestive juices would not burn their tadpoles alive.
Speaker 1: And then once the little tadpoles grew into froglets, they
Speaker 1: could like come out of the adult frog's mouth. But
Speaker 1: like the whole the like figuring out.
Speaker 2: I thought that's how we gave birth to Oh well,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna have to talk to Polavi after
Speaker 2: the show.
Speaker 1: Oh no, but yeah, if we if we hadn't lost
Speaker 1: this animal, like, we might have been able to do
Speaker 1: more research onto things like ulcers, gastro esophageal reflux disease.
Speaker 2: We lost.
Speaker 1: It's super sad, It's really really sad. And so right now,
Speaker 1: horned lizard populations are declined due to suburban sprawl land development,
Speaker 1: the pet trade, invasive species of vegetation without they depend
Speaker 1: so much on our national parks, and like if we
Speaker 1: lose our national parks or if our national parks are
Speaker 1: just left to sort of be exploited, I don't know
Speaker 1: that the horned lizards would survive that, like honestly, so
Speaker 1: it's very concerning to me. And again, like I know
Speaker 1: all of you out there just love animals and want
Speaker 1: the best for them for their own sake. But it's
Speaker 1: also like if you're ever talking about someone who's like,
Speaker 1: why would I care about a horned lizard, It's like
Speaker 1: there's so much potential interesting research that could be derived
Speaker 1: from them, Like semaglutide was derived from kila monsters. So
Speaker 1: it's it's just all of these like developments in human
Speaker 1: medicine and technology, a lot of it comes from our
Speaker 1: understanding of animals, and so just from a selfish perspective
Speaker 1: of wanting cool stuff or medical advancements should make people
Speaker 1: care about them.
Speaker 2: But you know, souf we name the monsters after using
Speaker 2: them for semi gluten.
Speaker 1: Yeah, also for also for anticoagulants, which are.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, also it's for the no I know you
Speaker 2: were listening just the selfish reasons, but for the non
Speaker 2: selfish reasons. It's like, why are we freaking up the
Speaker 2: world so bad? We're just one creature. Yeah, why do
Speaker 2: we have a right to completely destroy other animals?
Speaker 1: It's yeah, no, I mean, I I agree, I think
Speaker 1: it's messed up, but it's uh yeah, so i I'm
Speaker 1: I'm just I'm I'm just upset about the the uh,
Speaker 1: park rangers being laid off because there's some of the
Speaker 1: coolest people out there. Honestly, like, park rangers are a
Speaker 1: national treasure. Like if you've ever been in a national
Speaker 1: park and you're like, oh, like I stepped in poop,
Speaker 1: and they're like, actually, that's the poop of like this
Speaker 1: rare mountain goat or like this incredible like kuwaiti or
Speaker 1: you know, like oh, actually, all right, so now my
Speaker 1: day is not ruined by poop. I've been educated and
Speaker 1: this is really cool. Uh. And yeah, they've like they
Speaker 1: save people's lives when they go on hikes and like,
Speaker 1: I have a hydrated.
Speaker 2: Been saved by a part I'm telling me not to
Speaker 2: do something really dumb.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they have like like when like they they are
Speaker 1: the reasons that people can enjoy this mostly untouched nature
Speaker 1: in such an intimate, wonderful way. And so I'm again
Speaker 1: if you're if you are a former current park ranger
Speaker 1: or no one uh and you'd like to get in
Speaker 1: touch with me for to share your story. You can
Speaker 1: write to me a Creature feature pod at gmail dot com.
Speaker 1: I need their love, to have you on the on
Speaker 1: the show, or read your emails, whatever would work best
Speaker 1: for you. Guys. I just you know, man, I am
Speaker 1: I'm a little pisd. I'm just I want to squirt
Speaker 1: blood out of my eyes up to five feet away.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like that's but that's you like base level,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm gonna start out. I'm gonna start out with
Speaker 1: blood squirting out of my eyes and then we'll go
Speaker 1: from there.
Speaker 2: We'll go from there. We'll see what we need to do.
Speaker 2: I do want to say like a positive thing. I
Speaker 2: really went through the five stages of grief about this
Speaker 2: gastric brooding frog you told me about it. I was like,
Speaker 2: this is horrific because I don't like thinking about extinct
Speaker 2: animals because it makes me so sad. But Australian scientists
Speaker 2: in twenty thirteen, according to Wikipedia, created a living embryo
Speaker 2: from non living preserved genetic material. And then people from
Speaker 2: the University of Newcastle they've also successfully freezed and thawed
Speaker 2: tote to potent amphibian embryonic cells, so they have a
Speaker 2: proof of concept for threatening and extinction. Yeah, attempts. But
Speaker 2: here's the thing. If we don't have the same people
Speaker 2: that are trying to get rid of park rangers are
Speaker 2: also trying to get rid of scientific funding, and so
Speaker 2: we can't just automatically bring species back to life. All
Speaker 2: of I feel like all of the attempts people who
Speaker 2: are believe in climate change, people who are trying to
Speaker 2: save the animals, people are trying to save people in parks,
Speaker 2: Like they're all on like a certain side of the
Speaker 2: spectrum of politics, and they all like are working together
Speaker 2: and not trying to you know, like you can't just
Speaker 2: assume that scientists are going to bring back extinct species
Speaker 2: because the same people that are working against park rangers
Speaker 2: are working against them.
Speaker 1: So yeah, no, it's it's in you know, like if
Speaker 1: you have sort of like these samples, right, Like that's
Speaker 1: one of the things that's scary about like a sudden
Speaker 1: loss in funding is like where are you storing these
Speaker 1: like samples or these embryos and stuff like, well they're
Speaker 1: they're they have to be preserved and stored. And so
Speaker 1: if you suddenly like pull the plug on some research
Speaker 1: like things can just get destroyed.
Speaker 2: To the point where you can, yeah, like where are
Speaker 2: we keeping the information?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Absolutely so send a picture of that poor little
Speaker 1: uh tortilla sauce covered ringtail cat to your senator today.
Speaker 1: So before we go, let's play a little game to
Speaker 1: you know, you know, let's end on a positive note,
Speaker 1: which is that animals sound fun. We're gonna play a
Speaker 1: little game called guests Who's squawk in the Mystery Animal
Speaker 1: Sound game. Every week I play mystery animal sound and
Speaker 1: you the listener to you, the guests try to guess
Speaker 1: who is making that sound. Last week's Mystery animal sound,
Speaker 1: the hint was this, don't stick your head in the
Speaker 1: sand for this one, all right, you got any guesses, Pulvi,
Speaker 1: that sounds kind of like owl y cowy, interesting like booting.
Speaker 1: That is that is a really interesting guess. And you
Speaker 1: are on the right track because this is a bird,
Speaker 1: but this is actually an ostrich.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Congratulations to Aaron Kay and Mary d. For guessing correctly.
Speaker 1: This is a male ostrich booming male ostriches.
Speaker 2: Three boom boom like that like that TikTok guy three booms,
Speaker 2: I give that five booms. That guy the rizzler, What
Speaker 2: is it? I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm not on TikTok enough to know this, but I.
Speaker 2: Barely I know it from like memes on other social medias.
Speaker 1: But this is a male ostrich booming. Male Ostriches make
Speaker 1: this sound to stick out their territorial or to try
Speaker 1: to attract the ladies. And don't lie to me. Listening
Speaker 1: to this, you're a little bit interested, right like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: that sounds like a hot and sexy ostrich. If the
Speaker 1: female is impressed, the male might have a chance to
Speaker 1: offer a mating dance where he flutters his beautiful fluffy
Speaker 1: feathers around like a burlesque dancer, and if she's impressed,
Speaker 1: she will allow him to mate with her. Uh So,
Speaker 1: you know ostriches really they.
Speaker 2: Just went to the Liver Living Desert Zoo in Palm
Speaker 2: Desert and I got to feed giraffes and it was
Speaker 2: like a holistic experience for me. And then we saw
Speaker 2: them running. First of all, giraffes run like they're inslaw
Speaker 2: motion like the whole time, like it's not slowed down
Speaker 2: at all. They just like run like that. And then
Speaker 2: also I think they were like it looked like ostriches
Speaker 2: from Afar in the same little area as the giraffes,
Speaker 2: and it was really cool to see them like be
Speaker 2: in the same spot and like interact.
Speaker 1: It was the long next squad. Yeah for long next,
Speaker 1: long next.
Speaker 2: Squad, long neck hive.
Speaker 1: Rise up, all right onto this week's mister animal sound.
Speaker 1: The hint is this, some people just have a prickly personality.
Speaker 2: Okay, I think I know it from contact closed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, anythink right, You're absolutely correct, but yes, the I
Speaker 1: will I will quack out the correct answer, but everyone
Speaker 1: will know POLIVI was right.
Speaker 2: Yay.
Speaker 1: You win the satisfaction of knowing that you are one
Speaker 1: with mother nature.
Speaker 2: That's huge for me.
Speaker 1: This is crazy.
Speaker 2: I don't think I've ever gotten one of these riders,
Speaker 2: which really happy.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's fantastic gifts. Absolutely correct. If you think you
Speaker 1: know who's making that sound, you can write to me
Speaker 1: at Creature feature pot at gmail dot com. Also, if
Speaker 1: you you are or no park rangers and you want
Speaker 1: to share your stories. Also get in touch with me
Speaker 1: there creature feature pot at gmail dot com. Uh POLIVI
Speaker 1: thank you so much for joining me the gate to
Speaker 1: joining me today. Where can people find you?
Speaker 2: I'm at Paula Viganalan p A L l A v
Speaker 2: I g U n A l A n everywhere except
Speaker 2: this time just call it, which is cool.
Speaker 1: Whoa you got in there? I wish I had just
Speaker 1: gotten Katie. I won Katie.
Speaker 2: Pretty early, and then I just didn't use it for
Speaker 2: a year. But now I'm like, you think it a
Speaker 2: lot since it's fun and yeah, I run with my
Speaker 2: friends a show at the comedy store called DATS Recognition Comedy.
Speaker 2: I'm also like, I really need you guys to follow
Speaker 2: me on social media and like come to my shows
Speaker 2: because I am unemployed, okay, like many park rangers right now,
Speaker 2: and I am trying to tour and so I'm going
Speaker 2: to like Portland, I'm gonna go to SS I'm going
Speaker 2: to text it like I'm trying to tour. I have
Speaker 2: two dogs. Okay, dog sitting is expensive. You guys are
Speaker 2: animal lovers, Please sponsor my dogs. Okay, so come to shows,
Speaker 2: pay me money, help me do this profession.
Speaker 1: Like take the most pathetic photo of your dogs as
Speaker 1: you can of them.
Speaker 2: Looking I'm so sad a picture of me wet in
Speaker 2: afternoon tortilla.
Speaker 1: A greetin a tortilla factory gets stuck in it.
Speaker 2: I have the grease. I'm constantly around stuck.
Speaker 1: In a grease tube and then get rescued and then
Speaker 1: start like be like, come to my comedy show. Otherwise
Speaker 1: I have to resort to licking tortilla grease out of
Speaker 1: a tube.
Speaker 2: One hundred. That's already me right now, So I'm gonna
Speaker 2: post it.
Speaker 1: Guy. If you want to save pull A B from
Speaker 1: a fate of being stuck in tortilla factory grease tubes,
Speaker 1: go to her shows. Check her out. Hell yeah, thank
Speaker 1: you guys so much for listening. If you're enjoying the
Speaker 1: show and you leave a rating your review that tangibly
Speaker 1: helps me. Thanks to the Space Classics for their super
Speaker 1: awesome song x so Lumina. Creature features a production of
Speaker 1: iHeart Radio. For more podcasts like the one you just heard,
Speaker 1: visit the iHeartRadio app Apple past I'll do that again.
Speaker 1: Creature features a production of iHeart Radio for more podcasts
Speaker 1: like the one you just heard. Visit the iHeart Radio app,
Speaker 1: Apple podcasts, or hey, guess what wherever you listen to
Speaker 1: your favorite shows. I can't tell you what to do.
Speaker 1: I'm not your mother, but do try not to get
Speaker 1: stuck in a tortilla factory grease pipe. It's you will
Speaker 1: have to get so many babs, so many babs. All right, guys,
Speaker 1: see you next Wednesday,