Speaker 1: Start Up, Star Up, Brooklyn Buy Start Up, Brooklyn Buys Data.
Speaker 1: They make a noise Data up episode number it's the
Speaker 1: Brooklyn Boys podcast. Hello, Hello, Roan, I just threw that
Speaker 1: out there, he said, Lloyd Lindsay Young. There was a
Speaker 1: weather guy in New York City we way back in
Speaker 1: the day, and he would cut his ear and scream
Speaker 1: into the television camera Hello. And he would hold it
Speaker 1: for an obnoxious scond, and then you'd wait for your
Speaker 1: town to be shouted out. You would pick a random
Speaker 1: like an arbitrary city or in neighborhood. Yeah. But and
Speaker 1: he was the weather guy, Lloyd Lindsay Young. Him three names,
Speaker 1: Lloyd Lindsay Young, he could have killed somebody. Yeah, right.
Speaker 1: Isn't it true that they say that people with three
Speaker 1: names they're always the mass murderers, the ones with three names.
Speaker 1: You know why that is, right, Mark David Chapman, Lee
Speaker 1: Harvey Oswald, you know why that is? Son of Sam?
Speaker 1: Sorry what okay? It's not that people with three names
Speaker 1: kill people. It's that when there's a killer, they identify
Speaker 1: them by three names. So it's not to confuse them
Speaker 1: with other John Smith's. They try to more define who
Speaker 1: they are, so Mark Chapman. It could be a hundred
Speaker 1: Mark Chapman's, but they refer to him as Mark David
Speaker 1: Chapman so that they would narrow the list down of
Speaker 1: who is the guilty guy. So people who know other
Speaker 1: Mark Chapman's won't go They want to be so specific. Right,
Speaker 1: It's not that three name people kill people. It's the
Speaker 1: other way around. Do you know right now? People are going,
Speaker 1: what mind blown? It's not three name people. Everyone like
Speaker 1: most people that have killed someone do have to everyone
Speaker 1: has almost everyone is a middle name. But I was
Speaker 1: in my studio of the studio yesterday with three of
Speaker 1: my interns and we're all talking about middle names or something,
Speaker 1: and one of my interns says, I don't have a
Speaker 1: middle name. My father was just annoyed by having to
Speaker 1: give so many names, and he just I don't have
Speaker 1: a middle name. Yeah, I don't have one either, You don't. Nope?
Speaker 1: What okay? Hold that thought, because that leads into what
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say. But before you do, okay, Because so
Speaker 1: I said to another intern, what's your middle name? Whatever?
Speaker 1: And so so one of the girls says to me,
Speaker 1: what's your middle name? I said, I don't really want
Speaker 1: to discuss it. So the other girl says. The other
Speaker 1: intern says, oh, do not have a middle name? And
Speaker 1: I said if I didn't have a middle name. When
Speaker 1: the first intern said I don't have a middle name,
Speaker 1: wouldn't I have then said neither do I. It wouldn't
Speaker 1: have been my opportunity to say so. The fact that
Speaker 1: I didn't say that means I have a middle name.
Speaker 1: How do you not have a middle name. I don't
Speaker 1: have a middle name. I was not born with the
Speaker 1: middle name. Nobody's born with the middle name, you douche.
Speaker 1: My parents never the NICO. Look at my birthtificate. Witment.
Speaker 1: What's your brother's middle name? I don't think he has
Speaker 1: one either. What about your sister and everybody's that's the
Speaker 1: most used middle name? Or Marie Marie? You know I
Speaker 1: I will say that nobody names your kid and but
Speaker 1: everyone gets the middle name. I got confirmed because I'm Catholic,
Speaker 1: so I have a confirmation. I was confirmed Jewish. Someone
Speaker 1: looked at me and said, yep, Jewish, I'm confirmative. That
Speaker 1: guy looks for a good bargain. He confirmed confirmed Um
Speaker 1: Anthony Peter Skery. Peter is my confirmation name, but it's
Speaker 1: not my birth certificate name. I've never heard Peter, never
Speaker 1: associated with you ever, because it was only a conference.
Speaker 1: I don't even know why that. When I when I
Speaker 1: got my confirmation that I had to pick a middle name,
Speaker 1: but I did. They're like, we want you to pick
Speaker 1: a confirmation name, so everyone had to be given. Why
Speaker 1: did you pick Peter? Because of my uncle Peter? Because
Speaker 1: I love him. He's great, he's a good man. He
Speaker 1: was the guy that got me into uh, early forms
Speaker 1: of two way communication. I thought you're gonna have like
Speaker 1: a disease right there, early forms of dementia. Yeah, well, um, Lepers,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry my arm fell off. Yeah, uh no, I had.
Speaker 1: He got me into CB radio. Hold on, Leper, we apologize.
Speaker 1: Don't look. You don't even have to say that. Don't
Speaker 1: even give that to mabe fell off. They didn't hear us.
Speaker 1: Nobody's a lepers. No lepers listening. I know, I don't
Speaker 1: think so okay, Well, well, uncle Peter got me my
Speaker 1: first walkie talkie and he got me into that, and
Speaker 1: then I got into CB Radiosta you're here now? Yeah,
Speaker 1: communications communication, two way communication. It wasn't it weird not
Speaker 1: having a middle name like your initials. You don't have
Speaker 1: like a no. I was ayes they were gonna name
Speaker 1: me Salvatore. Yeah, they say ss no, thanks, yes, good
Speaker 1: enough for me, Luigi B A L S. That's not good.
Speaker 1: That's bad. That's bad. What about you? What's your middle name?
Speaker 1: My middle initials? L L, David L. Brody? How many
Speaker 1: years I know you're twenty years at least you never
Speaker 1: knew your middle name Ludwig? Is it? No, it's got
Speaker 1: to be something Jewish? Really, why Larry? Well, Peter is
Speaker 1: not Italian? Yes see it is. No, Peter is not Italian. Pietro.
Speaker 1: That's not definitely a Tian. Come on, yes it is?
Speaker 1: So so wait you're not what's your l what's your name? Brodie?
Speaker 1: Figure it out when I have a contest. No, let's
Speaker 1: do it, because then I have to answer people on Twitter,
Speaker 1: like everybody guessing my little name. So back to middle
Speaker 1: names and murderers and mass murder past. I'll tell my
Speaker 1: middle name is fine. Oh good, So that's a great
Speaker 1: way to listen longer or just scrub ahead to the end.
Speaker 1: I will say this. When I went to get my
Speaker 1: driver's license, my lack of a little of a middle
Speaker 1: name screwed me because Anthony Skiery was the name of
Speaker 1: a mass murderer. Aren't you on like a no fly list,
Speaker 1: a no drive list? Dave. Dave said they could not
Speaker 1: give me my driver's license in in uh my local
Speaker 1: d m V because they're even d m V as
Speaker 1: a middle initial. It does M what's the M stand
Speaker 1: for motor motor? Okay, So I'm just saying that I
Speaker 1: had to travel about forty miles to like the main
Speaker 1: State of New Jersey driver's license commissioned place wherever it
Speaker 1: was it was. I had to drive forever to get there.
Speaker 1: I don't have someone drive me because my life if
Speaker 1: it was if it wasn't motor vehicle, it would be
Speaker 1: just Department of Vehicles. It would still work. Like you
Speaker 1: don't need a license for a skateboard. In Jersey. It's
Speaker 1: called MVS Motor Vehicle Service. The MV is like that's
Speaker 1: people called the DMV. So um, yeah, so they had
Speaker 1: to put yeah, I don't know, they had to put
Speaker 1: a special number and my driver's license because of the
Speaker 1: Anthony Skiery of the same name. You should tell your
Speaker 1: father and see what you did to me like this.
Speaker 1: This dude is in jail somewhere, and he killed while
Speaker 1: he's a killer because his father didn't give the middle name.
Speaker 1: Probably resented life, and anyone out the middle name was
Speaker 1: the middle name killer. I was around killing people in
Speaker 1: the middle name. So first, do we apologize. No, if
Speaker 1: we apologize, this means then we're not sorry. We don't
Speaker 1: hard on because if we apologize, that means we did
Speaker 1: something wrong. We're not admitted to doing anything wrong. But
Speaker 1: explain what happened in the past two weeks, Brodie. Okay,
Speaker 1: we tried twice to do two podcasts. We said we
Speaker 1: would do two podcasts. We tried to do two podcasts
Speaker 1: in one week. We were not able to do two
Speaker 1: podcasts in one week. We were the intention was there? Yes, uh,
Speaker 1: one day we were going to do the second podcast,
Speaker 1: and you guys squeeze lemons and buckets for the lemonade
Speaker 1: Alex's lemonade stand Charity and Greg t was in one
Speaker 1: bucket and you were in the other buckets, stopping st
Speaker 1: and you won because you were doing like short little
Speaker 1: bursts of kicking and squeezing, and he was like chugging
Speaker 1: and jumping up and down his lemon juice and lemon
Speaker 1: pulp went all over the studio. I know it fell
Speaker 1: out of the bucket. So they had a shampoo the
Speaker 1: carpet when we needed the studio in the studio when
Speaker 1: at the top. Yeah, I love how the the mandatory
Speaker 1: email goes out like noon on Wednesday, shampooing of the rugs.
Speaker 1: Hello here, ye here yea, that's our podcast time, right?
Speaker 1: What about us? Why don't they ask us? We could
Speaker 1: have put up with the lemon smell, although the lemons
Speaker 1: were right where I'm saying. So that was week one. Sorry,
Speaker 1: so you didn't get that last week? Well, the week
Speaker 1: before that we was supposed to give them. We had that,
Speaker 1: We had our first appearance, didn't we What that was after?
Speaker 1: I can't forget. I can't remember. It's actually very a
Speaker 1: bit much more. Here's the thing, it's it's a lot
Speaker 1: of time to do the podcast, so we have to
Speaker 1: have the time. Do you want a seventy minute podcast
Speaker 1: or do you want a seventeen minute podcast? We can
Speaker 1: do two thirties, but that's cheating, um, if we could
Speaker 1: sign it off right now and do the other one.
Speaker 1: Sometimes times we don't have a studio to do the
Speaker 1: podcast in or the time anyway, by the way, we
Speaker 1: almost didn't have one today. Yeah. So here this thing here,
Speaker 1: do you hear that? This thing that's a big light stand.
Speaker 1: There's all there's cameras and uh, these arefessional, these lights
Speaker 1: are reflectors. He's a professional Hollywood of lights. Big did
Speaker 1: a big white bright lights right, Because you were supposed
Speaker 1: to film something I was and we're like, oh, well
Speaker 1: you'll film and then we'll uh, we'll do the podcast.
Speaker 1: So we waited like an hour. They never filmed. And
Speaker 1: then you get an email if the guy's like, oh,
Speaker 1: the guy who was in charge of filming, he's out,
Speaker 1: what what happened? Deck to me? His directed me? What's
Speaker 1: he getting? Um? Fuck you act to me? Yeah? Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's got one of the deck to me things. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was a deck to you. He didn't come in,
Speaker 1: but he didn't tell me he was coming. So now
Speaker 1: we have all this equipment in the way. I had
Speaker 1: to move it to see you. I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1: So we don't get and tomorrow, which is Thursday, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we are doing We're having a two hour at least
Speaker 1: minimum goodbye party for bald Freak Ranti. He wanted to
Speaker 1: come in here and say goodbye by the way, I should. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean we got to give him some. Yeah, well
Speaker 1: we'll get we'll get a little bit later. Yeah, because
Speaker 1: because you know, bald Freak has been you know, he's
Speaker 1: been in our family for years, and he's been on
Speaker 1: the show for twenty years in the background, producing great content.
Speaker 1: And next week and listen to this podcast, Yes, next
Speaker 1: week were is? The week of eighteen is way back
Speaker 1: Ronnie Week. It's all Ronnie's phone taps where we tag
Speaker 1: team know the people. You'll hear Ronnie phone taps all
Speaker 1: week and he's great. So it's Ronnie and one of us,
Speaker 1: although I think yours is gonna get cut Brodie. Russian
Speaker 1: phone tap. No, not you and Russia did a phone tap.
Speaker 1: Don't cut my phone tap, Ronnie. Yeah, hell out of here.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you why. I'm gonna shut the mikes for
Speaker 1: a lot. People are too sensitive. Bullshit, bullshit. I had
Speaker 1: to tell Brodie with the mikes off. Okay, here's the thing.
Speaker 1: I actually I asked for it. I put in order
Speaker 1: it for it to be produced. We'll see if it
Speaker 1: gets produced and if it gets by the sense. If not,
Speaker 1: we'll have to post it and air it. I'm sorry. Start.
Speaker 1: By the way, I'm just starting to think about a
Speaker 1: new feature here being one of them being running phone
Speaker 1: taps unedited with all the curses in it here on
Speaker 1: our podcast we have no I have I have some
Speaker 1: phone taps like these phone taps from years and years ago.
Speaker 1: They're unedited with with all the raw cursing, and our
Speaker 1: listeners have been asking, can we not sponsored? Can we
Speaker 1: I'm not sponsored? Can we not highlight one? Here's why
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, I'm not sure about that. Some of the
Speaker 1: people that we phone tapped are really old ones. I
Speaker 1: get it they but my point is those people we tapped,
Speaker 1: I don't know, seven, eight years, three years, whatever it was,
Speaker 1: I got old audio. Okay, those people didn't give permission
Speaker 1: for us to hear them uncensored. So as long as
Speaker 1: they don't get upset, I mean, I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1: But some of those people said some vile ship like
Speaker 1: the the phone tap where I I call as the
Speaker 1: Indian man calling the Irish guy. He said, some ship
Speaker 1: we could never air anywhere anywhere like that one. You can't,
Speaker 1: you can't, but we could do it on this podcast.
Speaker 1: Why not? No? You know the things you took out
Speaker 1: of that thing. No. No, there's also one where um,
Speaker 1: a girl screaming and agonizing about not getting her limousine
Speaker 1: for prom and it never it never aired on the radio.
Speaker 1: I've got it aired in another format on a on
Speaker 1: an old TV show, but I had the uniting audio
Speaker 1: of her screaming at her father. I want a fucking level.
Speaker 1: I took away her problems would be screaming like a
Speaker 1: little The one that we aired on our TV show Phone.
Speaker 1: We can tell people that's the well, yeah, that's the one.
Speaker 1: But it's an unedited Okay, the unedited version of the
Speaker 1: woman I phone tapped about the catering hole. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: said things to that woman that are so horrific, Yeah,
Speaker 1: so sexually disgusting. Yeah that we couldn't even feep it
Speaker 1: if we aired that. It's unedited form is off the charts. Funny.
Speaker 1: So one of our little secrets when we do these
Speaker 1: phone taps, and I'm assuming everyone here listens to us
Speaker 1: here and the big show, Yeah, but if you don't,
Speaker 1: we do these practical joke phone phone calls called the
Speaker 1: phone taps, every morning and they're highly edited, unvetted to
Speaker 1: make sure they go on the radio. They have to
Speaker 1: be radio but it is that would be beat the
Speaker 1: profanity and the sexual and it's too sexually. But but
Speaker 1: there were little little ways that Brody and I and
Speaker 1: some of us who do these phone pranks how we
Speaker 1: get to people that we needle people to get them
Speaker 1: to the next level of anger and screaming. We would
Speaker 1: say the most over the top vile things to them,
Speaker 1: and then we would cut that out or make it
Speaker 1: less vile when we put it on the radio. For
Speaker 1: the stuff that we said on our side of it,
Speaker 1: that's a little little behind the scenes, little breaking the
Speaker 1: fourth wall. So so I might have I might have
Speaker 1: actually come right out and I called somebody something that's
Speaker 1: over the top, but when you hear on the radio,
Speaker 1: it might have been maybe a little less time we
Speaker 1: we aired a phone tap, were a tap. That's the
Speaker 1: best way I could describe. Okay, So there was one
Speaker 1: phone tap from the TV show The Sexual the Sex
Speaker 1: Uh was it the sex Teacher? Yeah? Right? So I
Speaker 1: I called that guy and told him that I was
Speaker 1: having sex with his wife because she wanted to get
Speaker 1: better at s with him because she was uptight about
Speaker 1: certain things. And I I told him the crazy ship
Speaker 1: I was doing to his wife but as a doctor,
Speaker 1: very clinically, I said, oh yeah, your wife and I
Speaker 1: are doing this and I'm doing that to horror and
Speaker 1: I'm sticking it where and here we could say it.
Speaker 1: This is a podcast, I know. I let them hear
Speaker 1: it though, like if we're gonna air it, we should
Speaker 1: air it. I don't want to give away anything can
Speaker 1: And I said that woman, the paintering hole woman. She
Speaker 1: was I think she was almost sixty and she was
Speaker 1: getting remarried. And I said, so your honeymoon night are
Speaker 1: you gonna do blank? Blank blank? I said, woman, your age?
Speaker 1: Does that? You take it in the what? I said?
Speaker 1: Some things? And she was Her response was hilarious. So
Speaker 1: why can't we got to find the audio? It's on
Speaker 1: an old sun legal No, we will. So we uh
Speaker 1: we we did some things over the past week. We
Speaker 1: got our first appearance under our belt. We went to
Speaker 1: uh Brooklyn Bridge Park where we did a concert call
Speaker 1: from Brooklyn with love and you know, thank you for
Speaker 1: those who came out. It was kind of last minute notice,
Speaker 1: so we had a lot of people from the who
Speaker 1: listened to the podcast. We're coming up going I listen
Speaker 1: in order. I love you guys. We love that you
Speaker 1: listen in order. But it was our first the Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Boys appearance. Yeah, and they had it wasn't it wasn't
Speaker 1: a show that was created for the Brooklyn Boys, but
Speaker 1: it was a show about Brooklyn for Brooklyn in Brooklyn,
Speaker 1: and they said, you know what, let's get the Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Boys to host it. So that to me counsel that
Speaker 1: first appear. We had Daughtry and we had Jack Antonoff
Speaker 1: from Bleachers, who, by the way, has moved up my
Speaker 1: list to one of my favorite people on the planet.
Speaker 1: But my favorite, he's not the favorite. So he wants
Speaker 1: to get better. That's good. If you don't know Bleachers,
Speaker 1: you didn't get that joke because that was but that
Speaker 1: was fun. Okay, that was good. It's not fun, but
Speaker 1: it was fun. So so yeah, that was a great time.
Speaker 1: And then Daughtry. That was fun. Fun because we are young.
Speaker 1: Jack Antonof wrote all of the music he's in. He's
Speaker 1: one third of Fun. He's thirty fun yes anyway, but
Speaker 1: he's great. We're gonna go see him at his big show,
Speaker 1: the Jersey Short Stone Poem at the Stone Pony. He's
Speaker 1: gonna be there. We're gonna host that one. No, but
Speaker 1: we're going he has Very Boys, Yeah, because he said
Speaker 1: that's his favorite show over year. So he said, he
Speaker 1: told us we have to come to that. They're gonna
Speaker 1: get that gig that has Very Boys podcast. Those guys suck.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so it was a great time. We love.
Speaker 1: They put our logo on the giant TV screen on
Speaker 1: the stage and I put it up on our Instagram.
Speaker 1: By the way, we need help on Instagram. You can
Speaker 1: always follow us at the Brooklyn Boys at the Brooklyn
Speaker 1: Boys on Instagram. We could also use you at at
Speaker 1: the Brooklyn Boys um on Facebook our Facebook page, follow
Speaker 1: that Brooklyn Boys WTF on Twitter? Okay, when is that
Speaker 1: getting changed? Okay? Speaking of changed, I am now at
Speaker 1: David Brodie on Twitter. I told you that last week.
Speaker 1: I'm also now at David Brodie on Instagram. I got
Speaker 1: him botham screw you other David Brody, screw you twelve
Speaker 1: year old kid who had no posts and thirty two
Speaker 1: followers that I'm sure we're people who thought he was me. Ye, well,
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to get maybe thirty of them. And
Speaker 1: speaking of podcasts, I want to give a big shout
Speaker 1: out to Walkers and Talkers. Our new episode one Oh
Speaker 1: nine is up the time you're hearing this. That's awesome.
Speaker 1: Season mid season finale of Fear The Walking Dead, Season
Speaker 1: four major events happened. What happens when the entire franchise
Speaker 1: comes to an end? Then what the Brooklyn Boys? The
Speaker 1: Walking Down? You know what happens to The Walking Dead.
Speaker 1: First of all, the show is not gonna end anytime soon.
Speaker 1: Sure spinoff isn't ending anytime soon. And they've already agreed
Speaker 1: AMC owns the right, so they're gonna keep putting spinoffs
Speaker 1: out like Law and Order. It will be a problem. Also,
Speaker 1: we review other programs on AMC, like Preacher. We'll keep
Speaker 1: doing an event if if all the Walking Dead shows
Speaker 1: are gone, I got this to fall back on. So
Speaker 1: before you check out that podcast, check out Speaking Volume
Speaker 1: Everybody Going Order Speaking Volumes with Share and Scary. Uh
Speaker 1: my friend Chary Cosenza, she's awesome. We're up to episode
Speaker 1: number eleven, which should be out either today when you're
Speaker 1: hearing this, or tomorrow. But the good news is where
Speaker 1: can I hear that? As of today, you can hear
Speaker 1: on iTunes. We've made our way to iTunes. You can
Speaker 1: hear it on iTunes, Google Play, I Heart Radio and
Speaker 1: speaker like the way you put on radio third. Well,
Speaker 1: I'm it's a countdown three to one, Oh good, three
Speaker 1: to one, and then you said speaker though one three
Speaker 1: to one, you made I Heart Radio two. Okay? Company
Speaker 1: we work for? Yeah, well anyway, and then we technically
Speaker 1: work for I Heart Media. But I heard Speaking Volumes
Speaker 1: podcast with Sharon Scary EPs. I would like say, Walkers
Speaker 1: and Talkers available on I Heart Radio, and I don't
Speaker 1: care after that? How about that? Because I'm a company man,
Speaker 1: I see how it is. Yeah. Uh oh, episode nine
Speaker 1: of Speaking Volumes with Scary Jones and Share I understand
Speaker 1: you talk about dick planning scheduling nine or ten? It was, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was talking about the different seasons. There's the holding season,
Speaker 1: coughing season, yeah, and the what's what's the other one?
Speaker 1: It's coughing, fielding, fielding. There's a third one in there. Anyway,
Speaker 1: girl apparently girls making d appointments right now? Uh so,
Speaker 1: I don't remember what number was, but it's excellent. So
Speaker 1: I'm recommending you go see it. You go listen to it. Yeah, well, anyway,
Speaker 1: after you listen to Walkers and Talkers one or nine,
Speaker 1: are you making your disappointment. I'm doing that right now.
Speaker 1: You well that that are we supposed to elaborate on
Speaker 1: that or what people need to know what that is? Well,
Speaker 1: they need to go listen to the podcast. The girls
Speaker 1: are scheduling like guys to sleep with. Yeah, different guys. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have this guy on Thursday. Okay, why can't
Speaker 1: I make a V appointment? Could you make a double
Speaker 1: D appointment like in one day, like two d's. I
Speaker 1: don't think in one day or in one one day? Yeah,
Speaker 1: double if you double, triple D whatever, triple D. Yeah
Speaker 1: you can have guy Fieria as part of this. Yeah, drivers,
Speaker 1: din diners, drive ins and dives. Well anyway, but yeah,
Speaker 1: people are doing horse sauce all over that. Women are
Speaker 1: women are doing that. But guys don't make the appointment. No,
Speaker 1: you can't know. I can't do that. It would be
Speaker 1: pe appointments, p appointments. Oh, I don't call him PAS,
Speaker 1: I call him VS. Really. Yeah, I'm trying to be
Speaker 1: you know, clinical class and crazy Bill Night the science guys.
Speaker 1: I wanna be classy as I scheduled my women like objects.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be yeah. Oh, speaking of speaking of d's,
Speaker 1: I want to talk about where are we going with this?
Speaker 1: So I want to talk about I want, I got,
Speaker 1: I got a mini, I gotta by your wife. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: all right, what did you want to say about that?
Speaker 1: I think we're going for the erectile dysfunction commercial that
Speaker 1: I first of all, I want to give a shout
Speaker 1: out to a company that did the right thing. That's
Speaker 1: not normal for me, That's not usual Andrew Carnegie moment. Yes,
Speaker 1: Andrew Carnegie was known for catching someone doing something right. So, uh,
Speaker 1: one of my kids decided she wanted to play with
Speaker 1: the Xbox that's been gathering dust Xbox one a few
Speaker 1: years old and playing a while, and the batteries had corroded.
Speaker 1: There was acid in a little bad to repack, and
Speaker 1: I cleaned it all out, but it still wouldn't work.
Speaker 1: Put batteries in, tried, everything couldn't get to work. So
Speaker 1: I didn't know if it was the control of that
Speaker 1: has gone bad in the year and half since she
Speaker 1: used it, or if the acid ruined the battery pack
Speaker 1: which detaches. Oh my god, do I order a new
Speaker 1: battery pack or do you have to replace the remote?
Speaker 1: Because they're expensive? So I called up my local game stop, MHM,
Speaker 1: game stop, game stop. Shout out Livingston Mall, New Jersey. Good.
Speaker 1: So I went into. I called up and I said,
Speaker 1: here's my situation. You have used controllers and battery packs. Yep,
Speaker 1: we've got both. Come on in. So I go on
Speaker 1: in and uh, there's one guy behind the register. He's
Speaker 1: got a long line. Another guy kind of uh. I
Speaker 1: think it was a beard, maybe long hair. And I said,
Speaker 1: excuse me, can I get your assistance for a second
Speaker 1: when you're finished helping the customer you're with now? And
Speaker 1: he says, well, I was about to leave, but the
Speaker 1: guy at the register is really busy, so yeah, absolutely,
Speaker 1: what can I do for you? You'll be my last customer. So,
Speaker 1: first of all, he wanted to leave. I think I
Speaker 1: got there like let's say, four o'clock, like he should
Speaker 1: have everything good, so he should have gone, but he
Speaker 1: didn't leave. He helped me out. So he gives me
Speaker 1: the battery pack. He said, try it out. He said,
Speaker 1: it's not the battery pack for you. Oh tell me
Speaker 1: something good, nice miss something? Yeah, very good? So wait,
Speaker 1: wait for the course. Does keep going all right? Flour
Speaker 1: a little bit? So he says, you know what I
Speaker 1: have a cable. You can attach to the the the
Speaker 1: controller because it's a wireless controller. If you want an adapter,
Speaker 1: or you can buy the rechargeable battery pack, plug it in,
Speaker 1: charge it. You don't have to worry about batteries anymore.
Speaker 1: That's fantastic. I don't even know about that. He's but
Speaker 1: here's a here's a battery pack. It's normally like four bucks.
Speaker 1: It's used. I had a bunch of them. Put your
Speaker 1: batteries in this and see if your remote works. I
Speaker 1: put the road with me. I put the batteries in
Speaker 1: and it works. Right. He goes, you know what, no charge,
Speaker 1: take the battery pack, get out of here. Thanks for
Speaker 1: a good day. Really, I'm like, what are you kidding?
Speaker 1: I know a few dollars, no charge? No, I go, well,
Speaker 1: don't you want me to buy the cable and then
Speaker 1: were charging me? Because no, If you want to come
Speaker 1: back and get tons of him, he wouldn't take your money.
Speaker 1: Now he goes it, they're not worth anything. I think
Speaker 1: he said, you know what I'm gonna do, tell us
Speaker 1: bough stop. Well the guy didn't go home. Not a sponsor,
Speaker 1: not sponsor. The guy didn't go home, even though he
Speaker 1: was technically done for the day. Come on, Bertie. He
Speaker 1: spent ten minutes with me game Stop, and he gave
Speaker 1: me the piece of free because it wasn't worth selling.
Speaker 1: He's like, it's like, what gonna charge you? We love you,
Speaker 1: game Stop, so thank you. Games stopped living anymore. And
Speaker 1: I tweeted the company and they said thanks for letting
Speaker 1: us know. So I wrote back, and I go great.
Speaker 1: Now someone needs to call and reward this guy, because
Speaker 1: just letting you know, you know, guy doing social media
Speaker 1: for games Stop. You're not gonna write it down here
Speaker 1: just like thanks for the You know, this is an
Speaker 1: anti rant. It's anti rant. It's a that's awesome. Now,
Speaker 1: please don't tweet and ask me what a tanars. No,
Speaker 1: it's backwards backward rant. But I do have I have
Speaker 1: a car. I have rants. Today. I got two short
Speaker 1: rants and I got one that's gonna take a while.
Speaker 1: Al Right, well what if you want to do? Man? Well,
Speaker 1: you know I'm not wait until the end when we
Speaker 1: said we runt of time. No, no, we can get
Speaker 1: to think. I do want to know about what's up
Speaker 1: with your with your shoelace tying technique. You are obsessed.
Speaker 1: I am so obsessed. I talked about this on the
Speaker 1: radio slightly the other day, but then I noticed that
Speaker 1: you have this habit. We talked about fat guy laces
Speaker 1: one of our first podcasts that if the laces are
Speaker 1: off to the side, it's because the guy crossed his legs.
Speaker 1: He can't go over the knee. That's fact. That's not
Speaker 1: my I can do that. I can. But Brody, we're
Speaker 1: taught as kids to tire shoelaces double bunny. Double. You're
Speaker 1: taught as a double bunny. Where you want a bunny
Speaker 1: is the bow, So one cross them, one underneath the
Speaker 1: hole and you pull them. That that's double bunny. Not perfect, Okay,
Speaker 1: why reinvent the wheel? All right, that's great when we're
Speaker 1: taught to tie our shoelaces, but at some point you
Speaker 1: got to give that up. Why Because that's for twelve
Speaker 1: year olds. I think you're done. As a teenager. You
Speaker 1: gotta learn how to tie your shoes using the single
Speaker 1: bunny method. The single bunny you got it. I don't
Speaker 1: even know how that. I just you make a loop,
Speaker 1: you tell a string around that. I don't know what
Speaker 1: that is. No, you take the two ends, you tie
Speaker 1: them and you pull. Yeah. Everyone does that. Everyone. That's
Speaker 1: the first staff, that the cross. And then you make
Speaker 1: one ball, one ball, and then with your other hand
Speaker 1: and the other string the other lace right, you take
Speaker 1: you take it and you you tie it around a
Speaker 1: full around the base of around once around the base
Speaker 1: of the first b and then you do the pull
Speaker 1: through and the second bow appears. And now you've got
Speaker 1: two bows. But you're saying to take two bows while
Speaker 1: the bows together, while you pulling a rabbit out of
Speaker 1: a hat. And why is that cooler? Why is that bad?
Speaker 1: It's just that's the more why you can't do double
Speaker 1: bunny because it's too hard for you know, it's not
Speaker 1: it takes more time. No, it doesn't double bow done. No,
Speaker 1: I make bows with two fingers, both hands. But don't
Speaker 1: you think that it's the guy. This is the guy
Speaker 1: who told me I shouldn't use a bluetooth piece a
Speaker 1: few weeks ago. And with hold on. But every time
Speaker 1: you text me to call you, you say, call me
Speaker 1: on my home phone, call me on my home phone. Well,
Speaker 1: guess what, grumpy Grandpa, you'll use a landline in your house.
Speaker 1: Nobody does that because I don't get service on myself.
Speaker 1: I don't have service in my apartment. Okay, you know
Speaker 1: what it sucks. That's why I use a bluetooth. I
Speaker 1: want to hear people when I'm on the phone and
Speaker 1: they call my hands on the wheel. I got stick
Speaker 1: of sick of standing on my fucking balcony with my
Speaker 1: cell phone to get a goddamn cell service. So my
Speaker 1: shoelaces with single bunny when you move and switch to
Speaker 1: a mobile phone, because every damn time I call you back,
Speaker 1: you text me right. So I take out my tech
Speaker 1: stapp It opens right, and your little a little bubble
Speaker 1: pops up and says scary has a message me. When
Speaker 1: you get a chance, I can hit the little phone icon. Boom,
Speaker 1: it goes right to your cell phone. But no, I
Speaker 1: gotta go into your contact and I gotta look for
Speaker 1: your home number again and then hit the button. What's
Speaker 1: four extra buttons? What's wrong with that? Us? Your damn
Speaker 1: MO and I'm gonna call your mobile phone. I get
Speaker 1: old man crotch and you get off my lawn, Rody.
Speaker 1: I told you to call me all my host phone.
Speaker 1: You always complain that I try to control people when
Speaker 1: I say, don't text me back, and it text me back,
Speaker 1: and you get you yelled at me on the fifteen
Speaker 1: Minute Morning Show. By the way, episode two sixty two
Speaker 1: with Elvis Duran fifte Minute Morning Show. Holy sh it,
Speaker 1: that's funny. No, it's not funny. It's at my expense.
Speaker 1: That's why it's funny, because all your motherfucker's are doing
Speaker 1: is sitting there telling me that I'm an idiot for
Speaker 1: for accepting the business rectile dysfunction. Scary, You're gonna scary
Speaker 1: as he's most likely doing the rectile dysfunction commercials and
Speaker 1: he claims he didn't have rectile dysfunction. Well, I don't
Speaker 1: have a rectile this function. I'm just allegedly Okay. All
Speaker 1: I said on the product works all I said on
Speaker 1: that episode. And maybe we should play a little bit
Speaker 1: it next time. I don't know, but think back and
Speaker 1: listen episode two sixty two of the Fifteen Minute Morning Show.
Speaker 1: It's from it's from June twelfth. Here's what I'll say
Speaker 1: on that hilarious And it's hilarious. But I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: get into it here too much. I just want to
Speaker 1: clear my good name, okay, but I'm not saying no.
Speaker 1: First of all, to people write to people who have E.
Speaker 1: D Alaric tell this function. We'll call E D from
Speaker 1: here on out. Thanks to people who have that. That's okay,
Speaker 1: it's fine. A lot a lot of people have it,
Speaker 1: and there's something wrong with it. No, about a second,
Speaker 1: I don't have it, right, I don't. But allegedly I
Speaker 1: don't mind talking about this because, as Elvis said, it
Speaker 1: shouldn't be a taboo top not taboo. There's too many taboos.
Speaker 1: Why you should just come out admitted. No, No, I
Speaker 1: never said I'm gonna admit it because I don't have it.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying that it's for some reason it's not
Speaker 1: talked about, and maybe we should bring it out into
Speaker 1: the open, like so many other topics that we've done
Speaker 1: with for women's issues and guys. But if you function,
Speaker 1: don't be a dick about it. I'm not saying I'm
Speaker 1: a dick about it. I'm just saying I'm gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna give you a hand. I'm gonna help you. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you advice from a neutual standpoint. My
Speaker 1: standpoint is give me the message. The company is UH
Speaker 1: is Roman Health. If you want to if you want
Speaker 1: to standpoint, Roman Health yeah, Jetro They told me to
Speaker 1: go to the website Jetro Man. That No, not Jetro
Speaker 1: hit that jangle. Nobody had to mention this. Stop talking
Speaker 1: about that. What I'm saying is this, I can provide
Speaker 1: a service. Oh really, what kind of all men? Oh?
Speaker 1: Sign me up? Who might be going through this? You
Speaker 1: can get them hard. I could shed some light on
Speaker 1: this situation on the topic of rectile dysfunction. He'll help
Speaker 1: them stand up for himself by being a brave enough
Speaker 1: man to do a commercial. Read for it. Now. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna lie and say I take took take the products,
Speaker 1: because I don't and I'm not going to. I'm just
Speaker 1: gonna read their message and I'm going to be let's
Speaker 1: just say informative about it. Say hey, look, guys, if
Speaker 1: you're going through this, I know people who might be
Speaker 1: going through the same thing. Not me, but you might
Speaker 1: want to try Jetro Man. That's it. That's what I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do. What's wrong with you? Like Dr Phil? But
Speaker 1: you're like Dr Phil me with blood? Yeah, you just
Speaker 1: keep making those dick jokes. What what dick jokes? But
Speaker 1: I'm saying what I'm telling you is that it shouldn't
Speaker 1: you really, we really, we really should be able to
Speaker 1: get the message out there without laughing. Understand that. But
Speaker 1: they didn't ask me to help you with the commercial.
Speaker 1: And I feel like the game of the Shaft Hill.
Speaker 1: All right, listen, it was too hard for you to
Speaker 1: read it? Uh yeah, not in your case though. All right,
Speaker 1: So to sixty two, I think is the number yesterday,
Speaker 1: and then Nate it gets involved because he's he admits
Speaker 1: to taking the product, and then he decided should two
Speaker 1: guys do it? And the two of us are nothing
Speaker 1: wrong with that. It's Pride month, God bless you, whatever
Speaker 1: you're into. The two of us were gonna read for it,
Speaker 1: and two of us were gonna And then I said,
Speaker 1: where would two men talk about this in a non
Speaker 1: awkward fashion. Would we talk about it on a subway,
Speaker 1: would we be in a studio, would we be in
Speaker 1: a bath? Would you talk about it in a chair?
Speaker 1: Would you talk about it in your underwear? I don't
Speaker 1: know so so anyway, so we don't even know if
Speaker 1: it's gonna happen until you take your pills. And then
Speaker 1: you'll know, by the way, if you're if you're endorsement
Speaker 1: commercial less more than four hours to your doctor. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's all I'm gonna say. Let me talk to about
Speaker 1: that Beth and Beyond for a second. They redid their stores.
Speaker 1: Not a sponsor, they completely revamped their image. The look
Speaker 1: outside looking and really nice. You'll walk into the local
Speaker 1: Bedbeth and Beyond if they've redone it, you won't recognize it.
Speaker 1: But one of the things they did was they redid
Speaker 1: the the whole cashier area. So it used to be
Speaker 1: you walk down the aisle and it was like it
Speaker 1: look like a grocery, like a supermarket, like a checkout counter,
Speaker 1: checkout counter, check acount. Now that they did was it's
Speaker 1: one long wall of registers with numbers on them like
Speaker 1: one through fifteen, and the announcer comes and goes, please
Speaker 1: walk down to the register four. Like they don't yell
Speaker 1: next customer, right, No, it's all computer. Does that something
Speaker 1: similar to that? Yeah, yeah, all right, that's the new
Speaker 1: tign Okay, So what happen the news style. Here's how
Speaker 1: it is. Trying to picture this if you can in
Speaker 1: your mind. There's this long aisle of let's say fifteen
Speaker 1: registers one through fifteen, fifteen being at the where the
Speaker 1: line is right at the end of the wall. There's
Speaker 1: a wall. You you go into the tunnel. It's like
Speaker 1: a tunnel, right like ah like um what it's like
Speaker 1: a stable, like like an amusement park when you go
Speaker 1: into the stock going into his pipes. But but in
Speaker 1: bed Beth and beyond you go into the lanes where
Speaker 1: it wraps around one wall and then goes to the registers.
Speaker 1: So that wall is all like impulse stuff, gum and
Speaker 1: candy and like a little mirrors ship. You don't need,
Speaker 1: but you're standing on the lines, so you grab it.
Speaker 1: They call those impulse pulse bies. Oh raisinets like that.
Speaker 1: Don't need raisints. I needed a bath mat? Why am
Speaker 1: I buying a Companies pay big money to be at
Speaker 1: the exactly in that sta to t J Max. You're online,
Speaker 1: you're buying a vase. You're buying some discounted clothing. You're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I I cant use some chicklets and some wrinkle sprite.
Speaker 1: That's why. That's why they make the most of their business.
Speaker 1: You believe it, right, That's why you needs in the supermarket. Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm checking out the registers too. The cash just too slow. Uh. Oh,
Speaker 1: by the way, fuck you Ainsley, I didn't forget about you,
Speaker 1: your bitch, all right? That was my from the supermarket. Uh.
Speaker 1: And so you're like, oh, I'll take some gum and
Speaker 1: I'll take the National Enquired with Kimkudashon on the cover.
Speaker 1: Done right. So bed Bath has this long aisle. When
Speaker 1: you get to the end of the aisle where the
Speaker 1: wall ends, you can then wrap around to the registers.
Speaker 1: At that end of the wall, there's a sign that
Speaker 1: says wait here for the catch you to call you
Speaker 1: is that where the impulse byes are No up to
Speaker 1: that sign? Right? Is all impulse bies and there should
Speaker 1: be right that's where you placed him. Now you're at
Speaker 1: the the end of the wall where it says please
Speaker 1: wait here for the line, and then you're staring down
Speaker 1: register row. Okay, if all fifteen registers are working, then
Speaker 1: you have to wait there. But if only three registers
Speaker 1: are open in the afternoon, it's like a football field
Speaker 1: to get from that sign to any of the three
Speaker 1: registers one, two, and three. Okay, Well, if you know
Speaker 1: that registers fourteen and fifteen aren't open, why can't I
Speaker 1: walk all the way up to Register four and then
Speaker 1: wait so that when they say register two it doesn't
Speaker 1: take the person in front of me a minute and
Speaker 1: a half to walk down the football field to register.
Speaker 1: I see what's happening here. They're losing. Yeah, they're they're less.
Speaker 1: They're they're less checkouts per minute because of that. Right,
Speaker 1: So I'm behind this guy. He's one of these guys
Speaker 1: who looks like he's from a state that doesn't care
Speaker 1: about fashion. He's got his plane, no pocket. Uh, he
Speaker 1: like light blue powder blue shorts with his polo shirt
Speaker 1: tucked into his shorts with a belt. No, you don't talk,
Speaker 1: you polo shirt with a belt into the shorts. No, okay.
Speaker 1: This guy is staring like he's looked like he's like
Speaker 1: he's just got off the boat from from wherever. He's like, So,
Speaker 1: I say, excuse me, could you could you I'm holding
Speaker 1: a bunch of stuff I bought garment bag some of
Speaker 1: the things I didn't need a cart. I excuse me?
Speaker 1: Can you walk up to Register four? He goes, So,
Speaker 1: I said, there's nothing between you and register three? Could
Speaker 1: you just please move up? He says, No, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: wait here. No, they're gonna they're gonna they're gonna call
Speaker 1: the shopping the supermarket police. On me. So the first
Speaker 1: thing that comes into my head is what am I
Speaker 1: gonna name this guy? When I rant about him? And
Speaker 1: before I could say anything, his girl, woman, partner whatever
Speaker 1: goes around the wall of multi of Impulse purchases and
Speaker 1: she goes, oh, Todd, I picked out something, So fuck
Speaker 1: you Todd. Right, his name is Todd. So he won't
Speaker 1: move up, So I move up. I walked right past him,
Speaker 1: and I tell the person behind me, let's roll and
Speaker 1: and and so I and a couple of people behind us.
Speaker 1: I went right past him, right up to Register four,
Speaker 1: and they went to Register one. I was right there.
Speaker 1: Fuck you Todd. You don't want to move up. That's
Speaker 1: like the red light is a half a block up
Speaker 1: and you wait back in the corner because there was
Speaker 1: a yield sign and you don't want to pass you. Well,
Speaker 1: well I did something similar. You're not gonna get a ticket,
Speaker 1: Todd for passing the police wait here sign. They're not
Speaker 1: gonna charge you more money. This guy is a goody
Speaker 1: two shoes. It's like no cars are coming and it says,
Speaker 1: don't walk, I'm crossing the street. You actually, you actually
Speaker 1: faulted me for doing something similar when we were getting
Speaker 1: on our plane. There was a sign that said wait
Speaker 1: here at the gate groups one to four, and then
Speaker 1: there was groups five to nine. Now if I'm in
Speaker 1: group five, and I get to be the first in
Speaker 1: that line, if I want to, Because so I went
Speaker 1: up to that line and I stood by the rope
Speaker 1: because I know that groups one to four are gonna
Speaker 1: be in the line to the left of me. They
Speaker 1: get to go. That's a already seating if I didn't
Speaker 1: have that chip. But I'm like, but I am no
Speaker 1: way I'm going to be the last. I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: let some the group six or grow go in front
Speaker 1: of me a group seven or I am gonna stand there.
Speaker 1: And I had every right to go to the front
Speaker 1: of the rope of the second row because I knew
Speaker 1: that when one to four went, they were going to
Speaker 1: close the rope and they were gonna come to my
Speaker 1: rope open it up, and then there was no one
Speaker 1: that could possibly then I could possibly be cutting in
Speaker 1: front of I am the first man in group five.
Speaker 1: So why did you tell me that I did the
Speaker 1: wrong thing? You totally you. I remember this. We were
Speaker 1: in we were at JFK, and we were getting because
Speaker 1: I vaguely remember you being in group six and not
Speaker 1: group five. Really, yes, you were in group six. Well,
Speaker 1: then I would have been a dick. That's why. That's
Speaker 1: why I say something. But I was in five. No,
Speaker 1: I know you're in six because I said, funk, I'm
Speaker 1: in I'm in eight. You're like, bad dick, I'm in six.
Speaker 1: And I remember Dick rhyming with six. That's I remember it.
Speaker 1: And I said to you, you're not You're not in
Speaker 1: the front. You're like, I'm like in the first group.
Speaker 1: What's the difference? You were like, they're gonna call five
Speaker 1: and six together, they always do. I know this stuff.
Speaker 1: I fly all the time. Well, even I saw, I
Speaker 1: forget who it was, and I forget if it was, um,
Speaker 1: a late night show or uh maybe maybe been Jim
Speaker 1: Jim Jeffries bo I love on Comedy Central. I think he.
Speaker 1: I think it was him. I don't want to miss quote,
Speaker 1: but the but the line was when they call your group,
Speaker 1: if you're not in that group, sit the funk down.
Speaker 1: If they say, you know, don't like, don't lurk off
Speaker 1: to the side so you can swoop in at seven.
Speaker 1: Because what happens is they call four or five and
Speaker 1: six right, so four or five and six and moving
Speaker 1: along nicely. But then seven eight nine are just standing
Speaker 1: there right there, off to the side. And then what
Speaker 1: happens is when they go at seven eight nine, seven
Speaker 1: eight nine go right into the middle of that line
Speaker 1: instead of the end of a line. Yes, seven eight nine, listen,
Speaker 1: don't put the line. We're all going on the same
Speaker 1: plane next time. Book your ticket earlier. What have you
Speaker 1: done to be in seven eight and nine? By the way,
Speaker 1: do you notice that? And I don't know if we've
Speaker 1: talked about it on this podcast, what we've mentioned it
Speaker 1: before on the Big Show? And it's so true when
Speaker 1: when they call the wheelchair people, they always call them first, right,
Speaker 1: they get they get priority. Talked about this, haven't we
Speaker 1: the miracle flights that have we talked about it in
Speaker 1: the podcast? Who can do I can't keep track well anyway?
Speaker 1: In a word, if you notice it is like ten
Speaker 1: wheelchair people that get on first, but when the flight lands,
Speaker 1: those wheelchair people have to wait to the very end.
Speaker 1: Do you notice they only need like two wheelchairs at
Speaker 1: the end because everybody gets right off the walk off
Speaker 1: the plane. Yeah, because people are bucking the system. They're
Speaker 1: trying to beat it, and I don't like it. I'm
Speaker 1: not a system beater. I'm not sure where I okay,
Speaker 1: you don't know where you stand. I said, no, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna leave handicap people out of this discussion. But
Speaker 1: you know how I feel about injured people. If you
Speaker 1: have a broken leg and you're in a wheelchair, I
Speaker 1: feel bad for you, but you shouldn't get to cut
Speaker 1: the line. If we've done this on this podcast, I apologize.
Speaker 1: I'll make this quick. No we did, we have done it.
Speaker 1: You're already sitting down. You don't need to go first,
Speaker 1: you're ready. I'm still enough. I'm tired, you're relaxing, you're
Speaker 1: in the chair. Someone's pushing you. I can wait talked about.
Speaker 1: But you do have a problem with your window seat
Speaker 1: versus your aisles. Okay, all right, that's my big rant.
Speaker 1: That's my big rant. Well let's go right into it,
Speaker 1: all right, because we're gonna wrap this up. We do
Speaker 1: know we haven't done any unused jokes ground police. I
Speaker 1: told you guy, we get started late. Oh my god. Right,
Speaker 1: So you know I need the window seat. You're I
Speaker 1: need to look out the window seat. It comforts me
Speaker 1: as a flyer. I like to look out. I see
Speaker 1: that the ground is far away. It reminds me the
Speaker 1: plane is up. I see that it's ascending. During takeoff,
Speaker 1: I get to see it's casually coming down. I need
Speaker 1: the plus. To be honest with you, I don't really
Speaker 1: go to the bathroom usually during the fly camel and
Speaker 1: I like to lean again. It's the wall. Nobody makes
Speaker 1: me get up. It's fine. So I had to wait
Speaker 1: because they didn't assign my seat coming back from Seattle,
Speaker 1: so I waited. I waited at the gate till the
Speaker 1: gay person got there, and I begged here. I said, please,
Speaker 1: please give me a window seat. So she does some funagling,
Speaker 1: she moves people around whatever gives me a window seat.
Speaker 1: So I get my window seat and next to me
Speaker 1: is a father and son in the isle in the middle.
Speaker 1: So as I'm putting my stuff down, they come over
Speaker 1: and they're like, oh, those are our seats middle and
Speaker 1: and middle and aisle. So I said, hey, you know what,
Speaker 1: before we take off, I'm just gonna run to the bathroom.
Speaker 1: Right we're in like one so the bathrooms like six
Speaker 1: six miles back, not that far. So I go to
Speaker 1: the bathroom. I figured, I'll say right back with that.
Speaker 1: I see, uh, Danielle used in the bathroom, Danielle from
Speaker 1: our show, And she comes out and I go in.
Speaker 1: The First of all, she didn't flush, because when I
Speaker 1: get in there, she had she peed and she toilet
Speaker 1: paper peedd you know girls stop and she left the
Speaker 1: t pay but she didn't do the boosh on the flight.
Speaker 1: That's gross number one, number two. So I come back. Now,
Speaker 1: I did the guy p I paid a little hand
Speaker 1: washed quick. I come back. These two guys, father and son, right,
Speaker 1: I said, I'll be right back. What would you do?
Speaker 1: You'd probably stand for two minutes. When I come back.
Speaker 1: I come back, their trays are out, they're watching videos
Speaker 1: on their iPads, and they've got drinks open. They're in
Speaker 1: for the long haul. They're already setting up. So I
Speaker 1: come back and I gotta go excuse me, and they
Speaker 1: give me a look like, oh, I gotta move everything again.
Speaker 1: Fuck you. I told you'll be right back. Why would
Speaker 1: you set up like you're in your living room? You
Speaker 1: couldn't wait to get you my pad movies going and
Speaker 1: and your drinks out. So they that's fine. So I
Speaker 1: get back to my seat. And I like to look
Speaker 1: at the window during takeoff. I like to have a
Speaker 1: little snack during take off, like drinking soda. Keep my
Speaker 1: of calm. Don't tell me somebody from another seat told
Speaker 1: you to close the window. No, no, it gets worse.
Speaker 1: I like to look at the window. So you know
Speaker 1: how because by by the way it pause for one second.
Speaker 1: When you're in the window seat, you are in control
Speaker 1: of the shade of the right you bring it up
Speaker 1: and down. That's one of the privileges and advantages something
Speaker 1: in the window seats. You can't have a center sheet.
Speaker 1: Person you're sitting bitch, Fuck you you get you don't
Speaker 1: get the and I control the air and the light
Speaker 1: above me. That's my space. No, it is more wait,
Speaker 1: well wait, this guy took knows no rules. Where was
Speaker 1: this guy saying? Kid is next to me in the middle. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's he's like eighteen, old enough to know you're sitting.
Speaker 1: Bitch's sitting bitch right, So you know something is the
Speaker 1: windows seat The windows don't line up with the seat. Yes,
Speaker 1: not always exact. So sometimes often sometimes the windows a
Speaker 1: little bit behind you, a little bit ahead of you.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you get two winds. The pus so the way
Speaker 1: this worked out, the window was a little bit ahead
Speaker 1: of me, so I had to lean forward to look
Speaker 1: out the window. So when we take off from Seattle,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna look at the land marks, the stadiums. I
Speaker 1: want to get a nice view of seeing the city
Speaker 1: that I've only seen once in my whole life. And
Speaker 1: i want to get that calm feeling of us taken
Speaker 1: off and everything's going smoothly the planes taken off, I
Speaker 1: start leaning forward. You're a nervous traveler. To begin traveler,
Speaker 1: this motherfucker, well, you know what what? You call me? Andy?
Speaker 1: Handy Andy? Andy decides to take his phone out. He
Speaker 1: wants to film the takeoffed in about two minutes. He
Speaker 1: wants to film the takeoff. So now I'm in the shot.
Speaker 1: He's filming me because I'm leaning forward looking out my window.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, I don't want to be in his shot.
Speaker 1: So I kind of leaned back for a second and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I maybe wants to take a picture. I
Speaker 1: don't know what he's doing. He's filming the whole takeoff,
Speaker 1: the whole like minute and a half. So I'm like,
Speaker 1: I want to look out the window. I'm getting like
Speaker 1: flight nervous, so stick ahead in the middle of the shot.
Speaker 1: Who cares. I gave him a look like all right, man,
Speaker 1: film the Yeah, so I go back, go fuck it.
Speaker 1: I look out the window and I could hear him
Speaker 1: going like like getting upset. I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 1: All right, we take off. Now. If you're in the
Speaker 1: left seat right, I'm in the left window seat. He's
Speaker 1: to my right and his father. The rule is you
Speaker 1: get the right armrest right. Whenever you sit in the
Speaker 1: movie theater. Anyway you go, you get the right armrest.
Speaker 1: You get one armrest it's to your right, but the
Speaker 1: right armrest rule. When you're in that left window seat,
Speaker 1: you get the left one because it's next to the window.
Speaker 1: You get the right one. That's the best seat on
Speaker 1: the plane. You get both of them right, it's like
Speaker 1: the left I'll seat. Or if you're not aggressive, the
Speaker 1: middle person gets fucked out of both armrests, and then
Speaker 1: talk him to arm wrests. Go to the wind. I
Speaker 1: get the left window double armrest. Bonus, you get that
Speaker 1: he's on my armrest. He's banging into me. He's like
Speaker 1: elbowing me, like like he doesn't know he's jockey for permission.
Speaker 1: He's trying to box you out. You know, he's playing
Speaker 1: a video game, so he like elbowing me as he's
Speaker 1: trying to like whatever. He's trying to go for the
Speaker 1: rebound and box you out. We're halfway through the flight now,
Speaker 1: and he decides he wants to get up, so his
Speaker 1: father lets him up. So I said, oh, I'll get
Speaker 1: up too. Why you're at the window. But I figured
Speaker 1: while he's up, I'll go pay. It's almost a six
Speaker 1: hour flight. I'm like, if he's getting up, like, I
Speaker 1: don't want to get up and make him get up,
Speaker 1: But if he's gonna get up, he leaves his fucking
Speaker 1: tray down. He gets up and leaves his trade down,
Speaker 1: and his father doesn't like say anything to him. So
Speaker 1: you know what I had to do, because he had
Speaker 1: a soda out and his game. I had to climb
Speaker 1: onto his seat and then down on his father's seat
Speaker 1: to get out. So the bathrooms are in the back
Speaker 1: of the plane. Behind the bathroom is the flight attendant
Speaker 1: area where the food. They call that the galley, the galley.
Speaker 1: So he and two people are waiting from the galley.
Speaker 1: From the galley, he and two feet, he and two
Speaker 1: people away eating in the aisle in front of me. Right,
Speaker 1: So every time someone comes out of the bathroom, they
Speaker 1: have to shimmy past us, and I have to lean
Speaker 1: on the guy in the aisle to like on his
Speaker 1: head so that the people who are who big to
Speaker 1: shimmy can get by us. So I say to them,
Speaker 1: like in bed bath and beyond, Hey, guys, could you
Speaker 1: move beyond the doors and go stand in the galley
Speaker 1: and this way people come out of the bathroom, it's
Speaker 1: a straight shot back to the seat. No, they stand there.
Speaker 1: So I go and I wait, right, and uh, I
Speaker 1: go to the galley. I wait, and then uh, I
Speaker 1: go into my to my bathroom. I go into the
Speaker 1: second door because there's two doors on the right, one
Speaker 1: on the left. I come out of the second door,
Speaker 1: Dan yell again from my Morning show comes out of
Speaker 1: the first door. Now, she wasn't online when I went in,
Speaker 1: which means she was in there a long fucking time
Speaker 1: because I was third in line. So three people went
Speaker 1: into other bathrooms to people and me. Right, okay, So
Speaker 1: Danielle then walks through the idiot line of all the
Speaker 1: people that won't stand in the galley. I stayed by
Speaker 1: my second door, and a woman who's on the idiot
Speaker 1: line walks past Danielle's first door, and I'm now standing
Speaker 1: in front of the second door, right, I just came
Speaker 1: out of it. She walks up to me and says, oh,
Speaker 1: can I go in there? She just saw Danielle get
Speaker 1: out of the first door, So I say, that means
Speaker 1: she'd be be cutting you, wouldn't it know? I was
Speaker 1: coming out of the second door. So I say to heart,
Speaker 1: excuse me. Wouldn't it make sense if you went in
Speaker 1: the first bathroom you just walked past it and going
Speaker 1: to laboratory one? And she goes, oh, why would you
Speaker 1: walk past the open door one and then want me
Speaker 1: to move out of your way to get into two?
Speaker 1: I stopped so you could go in. I go up
Speaker 1: past you, all right. Maybe she didn't. Maybe she smelled Danielle.
Speaker 1: That's what I think. I come back to my seat
Speaker 1: two minutes later. Two minutes I'm gone because the kid
Speaker 1: was in the other stall. The dad and his son
Speaker 1: had their video screens again hanging on the back of
Speaker 1: the seats, trade tables down. They have new drinks out
Speaker 1: of the way. The new drinks from the woman didn't
Speaker 1: come around with drinks. Okay, after all that, he doesn't
Speaker 1: want to get up, His father doesn't want to get up,
Speaker 1: and they're they're texting. They're like, hold on, we gotta
Speaker 1: send this text message. So I stand there like a
Speaker 1: fucking idiot. That's not the worst part. I get back
Speaker 1: to my seat. Finally. Right, we're landing in New York,
Speaker 1: the planes coming in for a landing. I'm looking out
Speaker 1: the window because I'm nervous. We had a long flight,
Speaker 1: little turbulence. I'm exhausted. We're up since one in the morning.
Speaker 1: Guess what fucking Andy wants to He wants to take
Speaker 1: the landing. It wasn't bad enough. He wants to take
Speaker 1: to take off. Now he's so ding. I want to
Speaker 1: look out the window. Bad enough? You stud in the aisle. Yeah,
Speaker 1: your trays down, You get up to go to the baths,
Speaker 1: and we don't put your tray back up. Disrespect what
Speaker 1: I want to go back to my seat. I gotta
Speaker 1: get a dirty look. And now I got the comfort
Speaker 1: seat to look out the window. You want to film
Speaker 1: the landing? No, you're not filming the landing. Fuck you Andy,
Speaker 1: and fuck you Andy's dad because he didn't help it
Speaker 1: all either this kid shouldn't be on a plane. There
Speaker 1: are rules in the air. He didn't understand them. Fuck him,
Speaker 1: Fuck you Todd, Oh, and pre emptively fuck you lose.
Speaker 1: That's coming up soon. Lose Yeah, l u z car
Speaker 1: preemptively fuck you lose. The word loses in her name. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's um already UM did disadvantage. So all right, that's great,
Speaker 1: that's it. That's all you want to do. No, I
Speaker 1: got a lot more. We gotta do it next week.
Speaker 1: We have unused jokes. I got doctor's ap pointment. I
Speaker 1: give you one on you doctor. You always have a
Speaker 1: doctor's appointment. Make him on Wednesday's today's Wednesday. I wanted
Speaker 1: to do email and everything. No, by the way, here's
Speaker 1: what I want to do. Hold on, here's that want
Speaker 1: to do. I want to thank everyone that brought all
Speaker 1: mos steaks. A lot of people sent the copies of
Speaker 1: their invoice and their bill. They put pictures of the boxes.
Speaker 1: Uh you guys, huge tremendous and thank you for Yeah.
Speaker 1: We asked you if you could say, screenshot those and
Speaker 1: we sent them to the people who made the purchase,
Speaker 1: that made the account for us. Look, look, we're selling steaks.
Speaker 1: We're selling steaks and more importantly, we're saving people money.
Speaker 1: Seven sent off. Well, that's the main reason why we
Speaker 1: enter enter keyword. Yeah, that's what that wasn't a commercial,
Speaker 1: just saying that we we even know, but that's why
Speaker 1: we actually took the took this commercial. I'm like, we wanted,
Speaker 1: we wanted to pass some love on and they made
Speaker 1: that deal for us. So we appreciate the seven. Kristin
Speaker 1: Delgado at Fox thirty five. Kristen, she's on Fox thirty
Speaker 1: five somewhere in the country. We love that she's a
Speaker 1: famous person. That's cool. She put a pictures of all
Speaker 1: her boxes that arrived. Oh and Shady jew Mobster on Twitter.
Speaker 1: I got a lot of people sent but Shandy Jue
Speaker 1: Mobster gotta do my boys a solid. Told my whole
Speaker 1: office about Omaha Steaks, showed them pictures of all the
Speaker 1: fine about the mighty fine meat I got, and at
Speaker 1: least half of the people in my order in my
Speaker 1: office or ordering or order the next day or two
Speaker 1: saying the Brooklyn Boys code hashtag free dessert. Oh they
Speaker 1: want free dessert. Well you gotta mention Shandy Jeu Mobster
Speaker 1: and you got seven hit sent off. There's seventy eight
Speaker 1: percent off and also, um who else somebody? There was
Speaker 1: a couple other people that did too. You know, I
Speaker 1: got I got with so many but his thing. I
Speaker 1: want to want to play this song out. We're gonna
Speaker 1: We're gonna end with the real Greg break. Okay, so
Speaker 1: last last episode forty listen, I know you listen in order.
Speaker 1: By the way, next week I got a new listen
Speaker 1: in order song for you episode forty two. Before we
Speaker 1: do go, I do have to give you the one
Speaker 1: Grammar Police of the week because this is pretty bad.
Speaker 1: Did you see that? Is this real? Or is his
Speaker 1: doctor know this? Hold on a second, broudy Jesus Christ,
Speaker 1: give me a second. Here the someone said that at
Speaker 1: Eminem's at Eminem's World in Times Square, the ladies room
Speaker 1: clearly is marked L A D I E apostrophe s room.
Speaker 1: You cannot possibly be serious. That's first of all, somebody,
Speaker 1: thank you, by the way to Leesel Guzman at Underscore
Speaker 1: Lee's Land. This is not a hand sign. This isn't
Speaker 1: a sign they ordered from a shop that spelled it wrong.
Speaker 1: They fucking painted this is This is a giant yellow
Speaker 1: chocolate covered peanut that was stencil which means corporate ordered
Speaker 1: it when they designed the store, and they left it there.
Speaker 1: He's how do you allow that? This is a triple
Speaker 1: grammar mistake? And I'll tell you why, Lezelez l A
Speaker 1: d I. That means the lady owns the bathroom. It's
Speaker 1: hard bathroom. The problem. Yeah, it would it would be yeah,
Speaker 1: it would have to be l A d Y. It
Speaker 1: should have been l A d I e Sphe is
Speaker 1: one the eminem's names Lady? No, No, it's it's Mrs Brown.
Speaker 1: Do the eminem's have names? No, it's Mrs Brown. Sure
Speaker 1: about that? Well, that brown is the brown one. But
Speaker 1: what is the yellow one called? Mr? Yellow? Does the
Speaker 1: red eminem have a name? Guest, you can figure out
Speaker 1: the pattern the name. Nope. If the name of the
Speaker 1: eminem is actually lady, then we're fucked. We are the
Speaker 1: joke is on us. Hold on, I'm Brodie. I'm I'm
Speaker 1: starting to I'm starting to think, Brodie, I'm starting to
Speaker 1: think right now, and then I swear to God here
Speaker 1: live on the podcast. I'm thinking that it was such
Speaker 1: a bad he doesn't exist because lady is l A
Speaker 1: d Y. Then then I can't I can't comprehend why
Speaker 1: they would have left it that way. You're a major
Speaker 1: corporate store at the flagship store in Time Square with
Speaker 1: big letters. How the hell do you allow that to
Speaker 1: stay that way and not correct it? And by the way,
Speaker 1: it's not new, it's been apparently that sign has been
Speaker 1: up for a while. That's this Austin. Lookay, there's there's
Speaker 1: an article review on lady up on trip Advisor ladies
Speaker 1: dorm room bathroom. They took a picture of it to
Speaker 1: complain about it, and they said they spelled it l
Speaker 1: a d i apostrophes cost but no, it's okay, So
Speaker 1: the eminem is not named lady Okay, all right, then
Speaker 1: you guys on Wembley Stadium frostily and short of ladies toilets.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a British thing, but it certainly doesn't belong
Speaker 1: is the day is a long break Murica? Yeah, so
Speaker 1: we're not going to read any of that ship all right,
Speaker 1: let's get into the real Greg. I remember I wrote
Speaker 1: most of this. He changed one word and put his
Speaker 1: name on it. I didn't get a penny. This is
Speaker 1: a parody of the real Slim Shady. You listen in
Speaker 1: order as you heard episode four, and this is by
Speaker 1: the way, Barry Williams, who played Greg, I gotta leave.
Speaker 1: You're gonna play the Brooklyn Boys, uh song at the end?
Speaker 1: I love you all see a forty two Everybody Brady
Speaker 1: by great great great Marsha Marshall Marsha. I repeat, May
Speaker 1: I have your attention? Please real, the real great Brady
Speaker 1: please stand up. That's me, of course, Berry Williams, Great
Speaker 1: great Berry Williams, Great Brady Berry Williams. Oh, we're gonna
Speaker 1: have a problem here. Y'all act like you've ever seen
Speaker 1: a real Brady before, Bell Bottles, Polly Yes, her head bands,
Speaker 1: orange hair, wasn't perm was it real? Hay Hare's here's
Speaker 1: a story. Here's the story of a guy named me,
Speaker 1: Greg Brady, Berry william Don't you know we were the
Speaker 1: real that seventies show? And Oh Alice, Oh prepared Sam's
Speaker 1: meat for free. You know what I mean. It's the
Speaker 1: return of Johnny Bravo. Wait, no, when you're kidding. He
Speaker 1: didn't just say what I think? Did he? And Mike
Speaker 1: Brady said nothing? You idiots like Tiger. He's been in
Speaker 1: the head, a lisp in the head, a lisp, Greg Brave,
Speaker 1: I'm sick at him. Look at him walking around whearing
Speaker 1: his tecky god certain and wiping out. Yeah, but he's
Speaker 1: so cute though he was cool for a while being
Speaker 1: a teenage star. Another Brady name can only go so far.
Speaker 1: I'm doing stuff that's new, But I'm Greg Brady too,
Speaker 1: Football in the Marsha's nose, singacorus, and Greg Brady is
Speaker 1: the real Brady, all the other great Bradies of justin retating.
Speaker 1: So if you ain't Great Brady, please shut up, Please
Speaker 1: shut up, Please shut up, cause I'm Great Brady and
Speaker 1: I did ladies more than any big Bradies to stop,
Speaker 1: and you're imitating. It's I'm the real Great Brady. I
Speaker 1: grew up. I grew up. Please shut up. It was
Speaker 1: so much fun making that show for you, and then
Speaker 1: write my book to telling you who was dating you.
Speaker 1: Because it was all TV. It wasn't real. Just play
Speaker 1: back then we couldn't say that the dad was really gay,
Speaker 1: or that my mom and TV was dating me. TV.
Speaker 1: It was gruby, far out out of sight. But any
Speaker 1: night you light up a TV and then you see
Speaker 1: someone to be trying to be me great, Just be
Speaker 1: sure you know the r't no show without me. Berry Williams,
Speaker 1: Johnny brom Greg Brady, the Castle, Greg Brady Clinton, even
Speaker 1: Greg Brady, Akies coming up the Wazoo and a dig
Speaker 1: Eminem and Clark bars too. What was the oldest kid?
Speaker 1: And I was young and cute. I would never do
Speaker 1: too and I skill fit that suit. I'm here to
Speaker 1: stay and if you're getting my way, you could grab
Speaker 1: it where there hain't no sunshine day. Hey, I'm great
Speaker 1: Brady is I'm the real Brady? All you are the
Speaker 1: great Bradies are not sittingdicated. So if you ain't Great Brady,
Speaker 1: please shut up, Please shut up, Please shut up, because
Speaker 1: I'm Great Brady and I did ladies more than anything
Speaker 1: Brady out swim and she. So if you ate Great Brady,
Speaker 1: please shut up, don't suck up, Please grow up. I
Speaker 1: gotta get out of this time more. How did I
Speaker 1: get stuck in this box in the upper right hand corner? Anyway,
Speaker 1: I was a teen idol before the Backstreet Boys were born.
Speaker 1: I was a boy band by myself. I love to stay.
Speaker 1: Gotta go because something suddenly came up. So boys Wrong
Speaker 1: Brooklyn daw Boys, Brock brook Lay, Broolena Boys, Brock Broke
Speaker 1: Lay