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Speaker 1: Hello Scottish, Hello Kurt Rude.

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Speaker 2: Are you ready for this?

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Speaker 1: I'm so ready for another episode of the non award

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Speaker 1: winning Bananas Podcast.

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Speaker 3: Shortest title we've ever started a show with. But I

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Speaker 3: think it packs a punch. Okay, this worm has one

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Speaker 3: hundred butts.

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Speaker 1: Yeah it does. All right, Let's get right into the

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Speaker 1: one hundred butt episode of Bananas Do.

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Speaker 4: World unstead Would you believe.

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Speaker 3: Your mind?

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Speaker 4: Zillion pieces? Would banana? Bana, banana, banana, baby, banana banana.

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Speaker 3: Ladies and gentlemen and non binary folks, Welcome to Bananas.

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Speaker 2: I'm Brown, I'm Scotti.

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Speaker 1: Landis currently recording in a hotel room in Eugene, Oregon,

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Speaker 1: home of the University of Oregon, the only place I

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Speaker 1: applied for a creative writing grad student to get in

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Speaker 1: as a grad student and did not get accepted.

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Speaker 5: So oh are they?

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Speaker 1: Do they have? Are they the Beavers? They are the Ducks,

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Speaker 1: and Oregon State are the Beavers?

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Speaker 2: And Oregon State's the Beavers?

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Speaker 1: All right, But Oregon is like the Nike the big

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Speaker 1: Nike school where all the athletes and everybody has flashy

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Speaker 1: Nike uniforms.

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Speaker 5: A Phil Knight, beauty beautiful.

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Speaker 3: Should we bring our guests on Oh wait, this One

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Speaker 3: thing I do want to say. One thing I do

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Speaker 3: want to say is that, of course we all know

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Speaker 3: that I'm going to be in Philly in June.

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Speaker 2: Of course, you guys got to come out to the

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Speaker 2: Philly show.

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Speaker 3: And you also know that in October I'm going to

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Speaker 3: be in Hamden, Connecticut at spaceball Room. Yes, but you know, guys,

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Speaker 3: did you know that I'm going to be and laugh

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Speaker 3: at Louisiana Club three three seven on August. I'm gonna

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Speaker 3: be in Houston, Texas on August sixth, that's the Secret Group.

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Speaker 3: And I'm gonna be in Brian, Texas on August seventh

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Speaker 3: at the third floor Cantina. I don't even know where Brian,

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Speaker 3: Texas is. I have no idea, but I'm sure it's

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Speaker 3: near something else in Texas that I live.

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Speaker 1: That's true. I hope you're on the third floor. That's

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Speaker 1: that's the floor you want to perform on.

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Speaker 2: All right, let us get into our one.

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Speaker 3: Yes, guess she is a hilarious standard comedian. She's a

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Speaker 3: wonderful actress, an excellent writer. In fact, she just was

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Speaker 3: a writer on Pause with Sam Jay. She has a

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Speaker 3: brand new podcast with Naomi Peragan called I Love a

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Speaker 3: Lifetime movie.

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Speaker 2: Please, ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to Bananas.

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Speaker 3: Megan Galli, Hello, wow, Kurt, who books those rooms?

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Speaker 4: I gotta go Lafayette, Louisiana.

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Speaker 3: That Lafayette Louisiana show I have done before and it

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Speaker 3: is fucking awesome. Everyone for some reason is psyched that

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Speaker 3: you were in Lafayette and it's called Lafayette.

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Speaker 4: Oh it's called laugh at Oh great great, great, great great.

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Speaker 4: Yeah you were saying, you were saying some of the

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Speaker 4: names of those places, and I'm like, these sound normal

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Speaker 4: in front, and that's we're coming back and we're having

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Speaker 4: normal comedy club names.

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Speaker 1: I know, we're pretty excited.

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Speaker 3: And the secret group in Houston is they're wonderful. They're

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Speaker 3: like just fantastic and they.

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Speaker 6: Run like the festival that's there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, they're awesome.

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Speaker 2: They're great, They're very cool, they're great.

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Speaker 4: I hope they're not Astros fans, but I follow one

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Speaker 4: of them who's like, well, the Astros, and I'm like this,

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Speaker 4: it's a You've chosen a weird hill to die on,

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Speaker 4: but here you are theaters, true cheaters.

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Speaker 1: I also saw a video just fifteen seconds ago. Of

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Speaker 1: Megan bearing shot after shot at beer pong at David Busters. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: are you a bad as beer pong player?

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Speaker 6: I'm not.

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Speaker 4: I almost think the daveon Busters game is like cheating,

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Speaker 4: Like it didn't. I was like, I've never been good

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Speaker 4: at this.

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Speaker 6: We went.

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Speaker 4: I went to Dave and Busters last night, got there

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Speaker 4: after Last Call.

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Speaker 5: Oh boy, no, I was.

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Speaker 4: Like, there's no I went to see Corella with two

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Speaker 4: galpalas and then one of them was like, we gotta go.

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Speaker 6: It was really fun.

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Speaker 4: I had a fun time.

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Speaker 6: I had a fun time watching it.

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Speaker 4: And our friend was like, we gotta go get glow

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Speaker 4: in the dark cocktails at Dave and Busters. And we're

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Speaker 4: like yeah, and I'm like, there's no way I'm gonna

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Speaker 4: make it. There's no way I'm gonna like eat this

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Speaker 4: hot dog. I kept hitting my pen. You know, I'm

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Speaker 4: not gonna make it to David Busters. And then we

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Speaker 4: got to David Busters and they were like, listen, we

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Speaker 4: already did Last Call.

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Speaker 6: But you guys can play games.

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Speaker 4: So we just went and played a bunch of games

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Speaker 4: in a hurry without any glow in the dark glow

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Speaker 4: in the dark cocktails.

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Speaker 3: But so hold on, can I ask a question. There

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Speaker 3: is beer pong at Dave and Busters. Like, there's no

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Speaker 3: drinking from the collective cups.

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Speaker 6: No, No, it's just like a it's just a ticketed game.

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Speaker 2: And it's like light.

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Speaker 3: It's like lights up and you like throw it in

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Speaker 3: the lights turn off or something exactly.

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Speaker 4: And so like when you get a ping pong ball

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Speaker 4: in a cup, like the light it goes out and

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Speaker 4: then you can see and it's timed, but you're not

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Speaker 4: You do not get roof feed and you do not

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Speaker 4: the ping pong balls do not go on the ground

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Speaker 4: of a house.

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Speaker 6: And then you dip them in water and they're better.

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Speaker 2: Of course, Yeah, they're just fine after that.

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Speaker 4: These are top notch clean Dave and Buster ping pong balls.

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Speaker 1: Okay, nice, that's nice.

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Speaker 3: Oh man, I can't wait to go to a Dave

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Speaker 3: and Busters. I actually went weirdly. I went to the

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Speaker 3: child version. I went to a Chucky Cheese with olive

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Speaker 3: and gust just a couple of days ago.

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Speaker 2: It was fucking empty, which was awesome.

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Speaker 3: They do serve alcohol, so Lauren and I like had

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Speaker 3: a couple of drinks while the kids just and it's

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Speaker 3: now they like give you a watch band and the

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Speaker 3: kids literally.

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Speaker 2: We had this was crazy.

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Speaker 3: We had Gus in a uh like a high chair

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Speaker 3: just up to a machine that was the essentially a

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Speaker 3: slot machine tickets in a high chair.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so he's hitting in the high chair. God, and

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Speaker 2: he learned.

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Speaker 3: How to hold the watch over the thing until it

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Speaker 3: went green and then hit the button and then like

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Speaker 3: a ball would drop and he would get points for it,

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Speaker 3: or like tickets or what.

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Speaker 4: I actually I got poker chips for my third birthday.

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Speaker 4: And yeah, I see this in Gus's future.

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Speaker 3: Yes, oh yes, I'm excited. It was really crazy. It

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Speaker 3: did definitely look like you know, the classic shot from

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Speaker 3: Las Vegas of like someone in a wheelchair wheeled up

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Speaker 3: to like a slot machine.

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Speaker 2: Just boom boom, boom boom, just so little, you know what.

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Speaker 1: So now he'll be thinking about you, Kurt, and he'll

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Speaker 1: just be in there smoking a long hundred.

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Speaker 2: My daddy, Kurt.

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Speaker 6: He showed me away.

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Speaker 1: It was how we bonded. It was there's some love.

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Speaker 4: Please please give all of my best I know that

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Speaker 4: we're new friends, but we're onto a We're off to

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Speaker 4: a great start and I need to but I need

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Speaker 4: to keep my face in front.

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Speaker 6: Of her, you know, like, I don't. I don't want

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Speaker 6: her to think I ghosted her.

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Speaker 4: I'm here, Olive, I've just been I've been places, but

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Speaker 4: I'm thinking of you.

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Speaker 2: I'll bring it by, I'll drop her off. Thank you.

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Speaker 4: I would love it.

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Speaker 5: Take care of it, please for listen.

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Speaker 4: Acon's finishing school. I'm like, all of you want to

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Speaker 4: play beer pong in my.

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Speaker 1: Backyard my husband, Ohury, but tell us about these hundred butts.

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Speaker 3: You know what, I'm going to tell you something. I

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Speaker 3: will I'm it's a fake out. I'm not going to

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Speaker 3: get into this store. Okay, I'm going to say that.

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Speaker 3: Endo and Emily sent it in Thank you Endo and

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Speaker 3: Emily on instagrams. Guys, the title is this worm has

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Speaker 3: a hundred butts, And pretty much the title is all

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Speaker 3: there is.

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Speaker 2: It is just a creature.

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Speaker 3: That is, it's a very tiny creature and it has

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Speaker 3: one hundred butts. So I don't know if any of

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Speaker 3: us have a story about having a hundred butts, but

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Speaker 3: I was just gonna hop right into a difference.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, I like it.

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Speaker 5: That was That was the first time you've ever just

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Speaker 5: teased us.

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Speaker 1: That was like a lot. It was like to tease

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Speaker 1: it for magic mic and then you just got out

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Speaker 1: of it and now.

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Speaker 6: We're yeah, real cable news of you.

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Speaker 4: He said, yeah, hundred bots and then you never get

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Speaker 4: to it and it's like, what the I'm here for

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Speaker 4: the hundred butts.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Right at the end we come back and be like,

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Speaker 2: guess what it does have?

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Speaker 1: One hundred bucks?

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Speaker 5: All right?

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Speaker 3: So this was sent in this This title is man

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Speaker 3: Lucky to be alive after being stuck on amusement park

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Speaker 3: ride for forty eight Oh o what this says? There's

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Speaker 3: so many questions. This is from This was sent in

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Speaker 3: by still Dumb, whose Instagram name is at Dave nine

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Speaker 3: nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine. I love

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Speaker 3: you fans, I love you still Yeah. So this is

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Speaker 3: from the CBC written by does not have anyone who

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Speaker 3: is written by.

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Speaker 2: This is from twenty seventeen.

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Speaker 3: X Okay, So Carl Horvath is trying to resume his

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Speaker 3: regular low Boy after being stuck on an amusement park

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Speaker 3: ride for over forty eight hours. The Mississauga works for

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Speaker 3: me in town man joined This Is That in studio

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Speaker 3: and spoke with Pat Kelly about the howering thew hero

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Speaker 3: herowing ordeal I can't read Carl, a season pass holder

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Speaker 3: at Superland, has been spending a Sunday in the park.

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Speaker 3: Had been spending a Sunday in the park just before

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Speaker 3: it closed. He decided he wanted to ride the drop Acalypse.

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Speaker 2: Okay, one last time. Okay, here it is. I mean,

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Speaker 2: this is the craziest one to get stuck on.

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Speaker 3: The drop Acalypse is a twenty six story elevator show

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Speaker 3: right now. It's that free falling nightmare of being on

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Speaker 3: an elevator when the rope's been cut. A sad fun

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Speaker 3: for the whole f that's on family.

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Speaker 2: You want to ship your pants?

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Speaker 3: Do you want to shit your pants and vomit at

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Speaker 3: the same time? But I'm not going anywhere because you're

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Speaker 3: in free fall.

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Speaker 2: I'm drappy.

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Speaker 4: Canadians are into this too, you know, like I, for

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Speaker 4: some I don't even think of them as more intelligent.

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Speaker 6: I think of them as like just better people.

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Speaker 4: And it's like, oh, they want to get dropped out

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Speaker 4: of a elevator too, all right, yea.

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Speaker 2: It makes you feel better about being American?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 2: And but that's when something went horribly Oh boy, Carl, Carl.

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Speaker 3: Carl was stuck on the ride for the next two days,

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Speaker 3: dropping control stories of complete darkness about twenty thousand times.

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Speaker 4: What you know, Wait, he dropped how many times?

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Speaker 3: I'm so, I'm sorry, Carl, Carl, I'm sorry, I'm laughing.

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Speaker 3: I'm sorry. Twenty thousand times. He dropped twenty six stories

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Speaker 3: in complete darkness twenty thousand.

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Speaker 4: Twenty thousand times.

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Speaker 1: Twenty thousand times, actually crying.

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Speaker 3: He's an astronaut now, So, sa Carl, my heart goes

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Speaker 3: out to you.

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Speaker 2: This is a nightmare, but it means to be fun.

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Speaker 2: It's supposed to be fun. I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so he says, oh, and he's not.

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Speaker 2: He's this is I don't I'm not meaning to laugh.

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Speaker 2: I have empathy for this man.

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Speaker 5: I do.

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Speaker 2: Just that sentence is the funny sense.

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Speaker 6: In twenty seventeen, like more stuff has happened.

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Speaker 3: Yes, exactly, exactly okay, he says. It wasn't until I

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Speaker 3: was probably forty or fifty drops.

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Speaker 2: I realized, Wait a second, I've been forgotten what forty in?

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Speaker 6: He goes, I think there's a problem.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Two days later, after being rescued from the rod, Carls

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Speaker 3: take on the hospitals, where doctors told him it was

252
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Speaker 3: a miracle.

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Speaker 2: That he survived.

254
00:12:03,600 --> 00:12:06,000
Speaker 3: Yes, the doctor said that my body looked at it

255
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,320
Speaker 3: as if it had been through a nuclear fallout.

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00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,640
Speaker 2: He had developed a.

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00:12:11,679 --> 00:12:15,560
Speaker 3: Heart arrhythmia, his kidneys had become a shapen, and he

258
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Speaker 3: had shrunk two inches.

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Speaker 1: Whoa from the whatever from the force of falling.

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Speaker 2: Wow, they have no idea.

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Speaker 3: But I mean I guess like when you you have

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Speaker 3: to stop in some way, do you know what I mean?

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Speaker 3: So probably the stopping. It's so insane. I hope Carl

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Speaker 3: is okay now, yes, I pray.

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Speaker 6: For him to How was this ride running?

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Speaker 3: Why was it running over two days of being closed

267
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Speaker 3: while they and why.

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Speaker 4: Aren't they open on Mondays? Yes, it seems like a

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Speaker 4: fun day for people like us to go to the

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Speaker 4: like he just doesn't you know. Sometimes amusing parks, you'll

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Speaker 4: see them run the machines with no one in them

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Speaker 4: when they're when they're it's like coming back from like

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Speaker 4: I'm a coaster chick, so.

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Speaker 2: I love them too real.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah, big coaster head, And I'm like, what this

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Speaker 4: isn't he he?

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Speaker 6: I hope he got a lot of money.

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Speaker 4: This is like one of those things where it's like

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Speaker 4: he should sue.

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Speaker 2: Oh, that's the thing. He's Canadian, maybe he won't sue.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like sue.

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Speaker 2: He just wants to show and ride.

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Speaker 4: He's like, will you just will you just name this

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Speaker 4: uh ride that everyone hates after me, And they're like

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Speaker 4: that's fine, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, fine.

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Speaker 3: It is so confusing that it would just run non

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Speaker 3: stop for two straight days.

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Speaker 6: It's so it makes no sense.

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Speaker 2: It is hell. It's like, it's hell.

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Speaker 1: There are horror movies that are there. There's one called Frozen.

292
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Speaker 1: I think that they're stuck on a ski lift for

293
00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:49,120
Speaker 1: a weekend, like the last one, and like it's three

294
00:13:49,160 --> 00:13:52,080
Speaker 1: people and it's a it's actually pretty effective horror movie.

295
00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:54,360
Speaker 1: But there are And there's a Ryan Reynolds one where

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Speaker 1: he's buried alive in a coffin. He wakes up inside

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Speaker 1: of a coffin with a cell phone. He has to

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Speaker 1: figure out how to get out.

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Speaker 6: I've seen that one.

300
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Speaker 5: This is scarier.

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00:14:02,040 --> 00:14:05,320
Speaker 1: This is worse because this is physically assaulting you the

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Speaker 1: entire time.

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00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:09,040
Speaker 4: The entire time, you're like, no one I was with

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00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:10,080
Speaker 4: looked for me.

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00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:14,160
Speaker 6: Like it's like if you go missing at an amusement.

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Speaker 4: Park, you think someone's gonna find you, especially if they

307
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:22,320
Speaker 4: know you love the elevator drop. It's like, Carl's probably there, yes,

308
00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:26,360
Speaker 4: just no one looked, no one at the the park.

309
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Speaker 4: It's really shocking.

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Speaker 1: I got left behind in middle school.

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Speaker 5: At my school.

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Speaker 1: It's one of those things where I was part of

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Speaker 1: a I thought one of my parents were supposed to

314
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Speaker 1: pick me up as.

315
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Speaker 5: Part of a car pool on my street.

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00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,400
Speaker 1: It was a smaller school, but all the moms in

317
00:14:40,440 --> 00:14:43,000
Speaker 1: the after school volunteers were like, hey, Scotty, do you

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Speaker 1: need a ride? And I'm like, no, they're coming, They're coming,

319
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Speaker 1: They're coming, And then nobody came, and it was just

320
00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:53,840
Speaker 1: a miscommunication between whoever. So it took like it's you know,

321
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Speaker 1: it's like four point thirty and I'm thinking, like, okay,

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Speaker 1: nobody's coming. So then I was like I have to

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Speaker 1: get back in the school. And I saw the last

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00:14:59,760 --> 00:15:01,960
Speaker 1: tea leave, get in their car and drive away. So

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Speaker 1: then the parking lot's empty, and it was a big

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Speaker 1: Catholic school attached to a church, so I figure I

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Speaker 1: went down. I started pushing on all the windows. There

328
00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:13,200
Speaker 1: were sort of those eighties style windows that tilt it in,

329
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Speaker 1: and I found one that opened, so I crawled through

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Speaker 1: the window and I was like it was suddenly that

331
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Speaker 1: breakfast club moment where I was like in an empty

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Speaker 1: school and it was like all the things you want

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Speaker 1: to do. So I'm like having fun. I'm like looking

334
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Speaker 1: in people's cubbies. I'm walking around, going through the church.

335
00:15:28,760 --> 00:15:31,360
Speaker 1: The baptismal font's going off, I'm like touching that a bunch,

336
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Speaker 1: getting really you know, saved. And then I was like, oh,

337
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:35,760
Speaker 1: I'm going to go get some food. So I go

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Speaker 1: to the cafeteria and what you don't realize when you're

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Speaker 1: a kid is besides like the little snacks they sell you,

340
00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:45,120
Speaker 1: like the tasty cakes or whatever, it's just giant, industrial

341
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:48,680
Speaker 1: sized cans of corn and tomato paste and beans. So

342
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Speaker 1: then it starts getting dark and I start getting nervous,

343
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Speaker 1: so I'm like, I don't I called my house phone

344
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:56,800
Speaker 1: a couple of times. My mom was a coach, my

345
00:15:56,840 --> 00:15:58,960
Speaker 1: dad was probably at work, so they weren't home. So

346
00:15:59,120 --> 00:16:01,760
Speaker 1: I get to the nerve's office and I find my

347
00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:04,680
Speaker 1: card and I'm like and it's all my emergency contacts.

348
00:16:05,040 --> 00:16:08,440
Speaker 1: And I called my uncle Steve, and the moment he answered,

349
00:16:08,480 --> 00:16:11,120
Speaker 1: I burst into tears. I just burst and like it

350
00:16:11,160 --> 00:16:12,920
Speaker 1: was like up until that point, it was fun and

351
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,640
Speaker 1: games and I was lord of the fly style. And

352
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,360
Speaker 1: then suddenly I got scared because I was probably twelve,

353
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:19,960
Speaker 1: and then all of a sudden, I was.

354
00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:21,520
Speaker 5: Like they forgot me.

355
00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:24,800
Speaker 1: He's like, where are you. I'm like, I'm it sacred heart,

356
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:26,960
Speaker 1: and he came and gave me a ride home. But

357
00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,440
Speaker 1: it was having to admit that I was scared. That

358
00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:32,920
Speaker 1: like upset me the most, the most, and ever since,

359
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:35,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, I'm good on the breakfast club fantasy.

360
00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:37,400
Speaker 5: I don't want to ever be left ever again.

361
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Speaker 2: I love that. I love that.

362
00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:43,680
Speaker 3: That's so smart to go to the nurse's office and

363
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:46,400
Speaker 3: get your like you knew or were you just going

364
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,440
Speaker 3: into everywhere? Do you know that there would be an

365
00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:50,960
Speaker 3: emergency contact number on a car? No?

366
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Speaker 1: I figured that out because I went through. I went

367
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:55,640
Speaker 1: to the principal's office, I was locked, and then I

368
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,080
Speaker 1: went to the administration's office and I started like flipping

369
00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:00,240
Speaker 1: through files and then I was like, you know what,

370
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,880
Speaker 1: I bet there's like I just thought, I bet in

371
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,600
Speaker 1: the nurse's office or something. The nurse was really cool

372
00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:07,480
Speaker 1: at asthma when up until it was like five or

373
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,720
Speaker 1: six and it started going away. But because of that

374
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:11,600
Speaker 1: they had to leave an inhaler at the school, and

375
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:13,639
Speaker 1: because of that, I would skip mass every week and

376
00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:15,280
Speaker 1: just say I was having an asthma attack whenever they

377
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:18,440
Speaker 1: would shake the sense things, and so the nurse would

378
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,000
Speaker 1: just give me a bag of ice that I would

379
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:21,159
Speaker 1: let metal melt in my head.

380
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:23,080
Speaker 5: Then I'd bite the corner off and just drink ice

381
00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:23,600
Speaker 5: water out.

382
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:26,280
Speaker 1: Of the ziploc bag. So it was like little Club

383
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:29,280
Speaker 1: Med for little Scotty Lander's just hanging out once a

384
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:32,960
Speaker 1: week for an hour. But yeah, but it was funny.

385
00:17:33,080 --> 00:17:34,600
Speaker 5: It was admitting I was afraid.

386
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,440
Speaker 1: That was the thing that upset me. So I feel

387
00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:39,560
Speaker 1: so bad for your guy on the on the Superland

388
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,959
Speaker 1: uh death machine, because there was probably a point where

389
00:17:42,119 --> 00:17:44,520
Speaker 1: he went, this is crazy and then he went, oh

390
00:17:44,560 --> 00:17:46,119
Speaker 1: my god, they forgot me.

391
00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:51,640
Speaker 4: Said I got stuck on one of those bicycle roller coaster.

392
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,040
Speaker 4: Oh really, you know when it has the bicycle seat.

393
00:17:55,119 --> 00:17:57,640
Speaker 5: Oh no, this like the semi stand up card.

394
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:00,520
Speaker 6: Yeah, you'll be It's like and so it's.

395
00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,200
Speaker 2: A strap that goes over your shoulder.

396
00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:05,640
Speaker 4: It goes over this and then you're kind of standing

397
00:18:05,800 --> 00:18:08,359
Speaker 4: and it gives you You do get it's.

398
00:18:08,240 --> 00:18:09,040
Speaker 6: One that gives you too.

399
00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:13,239
Speaker 4: Much power because you can like decide which level, and

400
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,439
Speaker 4: so it's like, you know, you're there with teen boys

401
00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:18,240
Speaker 4: that are like jamming themselves up and their feet are

402
00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:22,080
Speaker 4: dangling or crouching down, and they're like in a tiny

403
00:18:22,119 --> 00:18:26,119
Speaker 4: little like Polly Pocket versions of themselves. But I was

404
00:18:26,200 --> 00:18:29,200
Speaker 4: just on it regular and it was at Kentucky Kingdom.

405
00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:30,760
Speaker 4: I don't even know if that's still.

406
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:35,600
Speaker 5: Kentucky Kingdom, so real, it was.

407
00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:37,440
Speaker 4: One of the you know what I think now it's

408
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:40,600
Speaker 4: owned by a six Flags probably, And I do remember

409
00:18:40,640 --> 00:18:44,040
Speaker 4: the workers had to wear khakis and we saw a

410
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 4: guy operating one of the rides and he had poop

411
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:51,680
Speaker 4: stains on his khakis and that honestly stands out more

412
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:56,479
Speaker 4: to me than having a bike seat rams in my vagina.

413
00:18:56,600 --> 00:18:58,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, I can understand why.

414
00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:02,040
Speaker 4: I remember being like, can you get poop on your pants?

415
00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:07,320
Speaker 3: Because you had to That means he had to have

416
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:09,280
Speaker 3: shipped somewhere put his pants back on.

417
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:10,359
Speaker 2: That's sad it.

418
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:13,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, because it wasn't like he had not pooped his pants,

419
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:17,520
Speaker 4: He just had not wiped well enough to He just

420
00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:22,200
Speaker 4: got poop on his pants. And I think about him

421
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:26,480
Speaker 4: a lot, like truly, he's one of the reasons that

422
00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:28,560
Speaker 4: I think I've never probably had poop on my pants

423
00:19:28,800 --> 00:19:33,200
Speaker 4: is because I saw a cautionary tale. We got stuck.

424
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:35,920
Speaker 4: We had to, like, I mean, that's what's so crazy.

425
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:38,159
Speaker 4: When you're stuck on a roller coaster, You're like, I

426
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,560
Speaker 4: want to get off. Like sometimes they're like okay, now

427
00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:43,040
Speaker 4: we're going and you're like, no, no, let me come

428
00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:46,600
Speaker 4: back in. And so I think we went back and

429
00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:48,800
Speaker 4: we like they were. It was shut down for the

430
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:52,359
Speaker 4: rest of the day, which is a true saving grace.

431
00:19:52,359 --> 00:19:56,280
Speaker 4: But we were like up the thing, waiting on the

432
00:19:56,359 --> 00:20:02,600
Speaker 4: bicycle like a like a far incline back just boy, yeah,

433
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:04,520
Speaker 4: it stops, and then we walked down the steps.

434
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:05,920
Speaker 5: It starts becoming a machine.

435
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:08,640
Speaker 1: You're suddenly stopped in a machine, and not just like

436
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:11,359
Speaker 1: a thrill ride. It's like, oh this is hard and cold,

437
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:14,320
Speaker 1: plastic and metal all around me in a prison cell.

438
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,640
Speaker 4: I also filmed something this is so embarrassing.

439
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:18,280
Speaker 5: Oh good.

440
00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:22,040
Speaker 4: I filmed a quote unquote talk show at a water

441
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:26,040
Speaker 4: park and they someone was interviewing me and they made

442
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:29,520
Speaker 4: us go down one of those giant water you're like

443
00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:32,720
Speaker 4: in the big round thing holding on. I had to

444
00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:36,320
Speaker 4: go down that twelve times. In a row no line.

445
00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:38,320
Speaker 4: We would get to the bottom and then they would

446
00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:40,840
Speaker 4: send us right back, so we would like climb six

447
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:43,879
Speaker 4: flights of stairs just back to back while someone was

448
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:44,600
Speaker 4: interviewing me.

449
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,320
Speaker 6: And I'm in like a quake shake.

450
00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:50,120
Speaker 4: Or whatever the fuck it was called, and people are

451
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,920
Speaker 4: so mad at us. It was one of two times

452
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,120
Speaker 4: where I've tried to wear a bikini for a shoe

453
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:58,280
Speaker 4: and a gay casting man has been like, no, I

454
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:58,919
Speaker 4: don't think so.

455
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:03,840
Speaker 6: And then I was in a I was in a

456
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:04,560
Speaker 6: rash guard.

457
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:05,800
Speaker 4: I'm like, what a loser?

458
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:10,040
Speaker 2: Rash guards for the for a slide?

459
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:12,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, God, that's terrible.

460
00:21:12,800 --> 00:21:15,680
Speaker 4: Twelve times in a row boy, it was a lot,

461
00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:18,040
Speaker 4: and I felt like I had trunk too.

462
00:21:18,119 --> 00:21:20,000
Speaker 6: I can't imagine twenty thousand.

463
00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:21,680
Speaker 2: My heart got my car.

464
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:26,400
Speaker 5: I've heard, I've heard I feel laughing, but.

465
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:27,880
Speaker 2: I feel so bad for laughing.

466
00:21:28,080 --> 00:21:29,200
Speaker 4: I want him to have money.

467
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,320
Speaker 5: Well, it's ridiculous, it is ridiculous.

468
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:34,720
Speaker 2: I just want him to be about a penis.

469
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,560
Speaker 4: I don't know why I feel.

470
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:37,640
Speaker 2: Like you think about his penis.

471
00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:38,679
Speaker 6: I'm worried about it.

472
00:21:38,880 --> 00:21:42,840
Speaker 4: I'm worried about it, nuclear fallout, Like I'm just trying

473
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:45,160
Speaker 4: to think of one of of what Karl would care about.

474
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:46,960
Speaker 6: And I do think his dick would be one of

475
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:47,479
Speaker 6: the things.

476
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:48,320
Speaker 4: And if his.

477
00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:50,800
Speaker 6: Whole body shrink two inches.

478
00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:55,240
Speaker 4: And nuclear fallout like his dick may be like mangled.

479
00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:57,000
Speaker 4: It may not, it may be floppy town.

480
00:21:57,240 --> 00:22:03,720
Speaker 1: You know, we're wishing him hard safe, normal penises. Should

481
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:04,480
Speaker 1: I switch it up?

482
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:05,920
Speaker 2: Give me another one?

483
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:07,639
Speaker 5: Okay, I'm going to bury the lead on this one.

484
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:09,520
Speaker 1: I'm actually not going to read the headline till after,

485
00:22:09,560 --> 00:22:12,800
Speaker 1: because the headline gives away what is so amazing about this.

486
00:22:12,800 --> 00:22:16,280
Speaker 5: This is from Yahoo News, written by Reid Macarter.

487
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,520
Speaker 1: Best in the business, I mean, obviously the best trader

488
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:24,720
Speaker 1: there's ever been, sent in by Melissa twenty one Ashley.

489
00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 1: Melissa twenty one, Ashley, thank you so very much for this.

490
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,840
Speaker 1: The world is filled with all kinds of strange secrets

491
00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:34,080
Speaker 1: hidden away in lock boxes, buried underground, or resting on

492
00:22:34,119 --> 00:22:37,280
Speaker 1: the ocean floor. It makes sense then, that if one

493
00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:41,040
Speaker 1: to one were to find an unmarked metal container buried

494
00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:45,560
Speaker 1: in the earth, they'd imagine it contained unimaginable treasures. Not

495
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:53,160
Speaker 1: the best sentence I've ever read, Christian Van Vuren CVB. Yeah, CVB,

496
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:57,199
Speaker 1: lots of lots of vals with his friends call him

497
00:22:57,200 --> 00:23:00,919
Speaker 1: Alphabet tweeted that his friend Pat Stevenson found a locked

498
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:05,520
Speaker 1: safe buried underground five years ago in his yard. Since

499
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,000
Speaker 1: the time of the discovery, Stevenson has looked at the

500
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 1: box with anticipation over what might be inside. Today, he

501
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:16,560
Speaker 1: finally opened that safe Van Beuren Rights.

502
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:18,160
Speaker 5: So five years found it barre in his yard.

503
00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,560
Speaker 1: Huge safe like metal, think big, as big as a

504
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:23,640
Speaker 1: It's a giant like a.

505
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:28,359
Speaker 4: Bank, like when they put jewelry in you, like a

506
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:29,240
Speaker 4: mini fridge.

507
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:31,399
Speaker 2: Your whole body would have to hug it.

508
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:33,480
Speaker 6: Yeah, Yes, in his yard.

509
00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 1: Yes. Photos show the laborious process of a saw biting

510
00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:41,840
Speaker 1: through layers and layers of metal, sparks flying as to

511
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 1: undercover the secret inside. What imagined a what incredible things

512
00:23:46,520 --> 00:23:49,280
Speaker 1: could be hid inside? And the long away to answer

513
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:52,560
Speaker 1: to that question is quote a promotional condom from the

514
00:23:52,600 --> 00:23:55,640
Speaker 1: two thousand and two movie Triple Egg starring Vin Diesel.

515
00:23:56,080 --> 00:23:59,280
Speaker 1: That's it, that's it.

516
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:07,040
Speaker 4: That's it a promotion, a promotional condom.

517
00:24:06,200 --> 00:24:10,560
Speaker 2: From This is a genius. This is a genius.

518
00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:14,560
Speaker 3: He took a Triple X promotional condom, put it in

519
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,399
Speaker 3: a giant safe, locked it, and then buried it in

520
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:19,320
Speaker 3: his backyard.

521
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:21,560
Speaker 2: Just for someone with somebody.

522
00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 1: The majestic Treasure is shown being held between a thumb

523
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:29,879
Speaker 1: and forefinger, its owner careful not to damage the advertisement

524
00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 1: on the condom's bad tattoo movie logo, a perfectly preserved

525
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:37,119
Speaker 1: line of text reading quote a new breed of secret agent.

526
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:43,240
Speaker 1: This is so good. Oh man, he said, says Stevenson

527
00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:45,960
Speaker 1: took his life into his own hands by opening the safe,

528
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,719
Speaker 1: not knowing if it would be filled with noxious gas

529
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:51,879
Speaker 1: or a booby trap or a series of traps. But

530
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:56,800
Speaker 1: the gambitate off. Oh god, we uh so yeah, the

531
00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:00,159
Speaker 1: triple X Brandon condom from over nineteen years ago, or

532
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:06,119
Speaker 1: sounding petitions saying it belongs to a museum. Oh and

533
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:10,400
Speaker 1: I just encourage everyone out there to do this kind

534
00:25:10,440 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 1: of absurdity. This is something Kurt and I love to do.

535
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:17,399
Speaker 1: Think of something, find a biodegradable time capsule, bury it

536
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:19,800
Speaker 1: somewhere in your town. Let us know what you do,

537
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:22,119
Speaker 1: but just do it without a note. Just do it

538
00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:24,400
Speaker 1: for the sake of absurdity.

539
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:28,960
Speaker 4: This is a real like disposable income prank because it's

540
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 4: like they spent I mean, a safe does not seem cheap.

541
00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:39,080
Speaker 4: And then to like, yeah, you need like manpower, probably

542
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:43,119
Speaker 4: a back home like machinery to bury it. And then

543
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 4: you got to be in the house long enough, you know,

544
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:49,240
Speaker 4: like this takes legwork. Who I hope that person's still

545
00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:52,320
Speaker 4: alive to see their dreams come true.

546
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:57,440
Speaker 1: I mean a single triple X condom in a say,

547
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,440
Speaker 1: five years of anticipation and then he cuts it open

548
00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:02,640
Speaker 1: and like Phil, it's so I love.

549
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:03,719
Speaker 2: I know.

550
00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:05,359
Speaker 3: I mean like because I you know, I used to

551
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 3: go I I used to do. I used to sign

552
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,399
Speaker 3: go into Barnes and Noble and sign books from the

553
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:13,640
Speaker 3: author and put them back on the show. Wow wow

554
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,320
Speaker 3: and uh and I And that's it's just the same thing.

555
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 3: It's like, I have no idea if anyone ever found

556
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 3: a single one. But my favorite one that I ever

557
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:27,040
Speaker 3: did was on all these Clive Cussler books. I just wrote, uh,

558
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:30,080
Speaker 3: jive Hustler, Live Custler.

559
00:26:35,000 --> 00:26:35,960
Speaker 5: Somebody has that book.

560
00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:40,639
Speaker 3: Somebody has somebody has Yeah, people doing it because I

561
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,719
Speaker 3: talked about it on my first stand up album, and

562
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:45,960
Speaker 3: people would do it. We would go in and sign

563
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 3: jive Hustler, Clive Custler and then put it up and

564
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:50,679
Speaker 3: then put it back and take pictures of it.

565
00:26:50,760 --> 00:26:51,399
Speaker 5: So I like that.

566
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:52,639
Speaker 2: Other people do it as well.

567
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 4: What did the condoms say?

568
00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:57,639
Speaker 1: Again, it's Ax from the movie Triple X during VINDI

569
00:26:58,480 --> 00:27:01,240
Speaker 1: and it's a quote a new of secret.

570
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:07,000
Speaker 5: Agent I've written on the condom. On the condom, Yeah, magical, reed,

571
00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 5: we get it.

572
00:27:09,119 --> 00:27:09,520
Speaker 1: Pretty good.

573
00:27:09,600 --> 00:27:10,919
Speaker 2: I've never seen Triple X.

574
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:11,879
Speaker 4: I haven't either.

575
00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 5: Oh it's any Yeah.

576
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:15,560
Speaker 1: I saw them both actually, that one and the ice

577
00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 1: Cube one, and uh pretty bad, you know, fun, laughable,

578
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,199
Speaker 1: but a good plane movie, laugh out loud on a

579
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:23,280
Speaker 1: plane to Triple X.

580
00:27:24,160 --> 00:27:26,679
Speaker 6: All right, it was crazy read condoms.

581
00:27:26,760 --> 00:27:30,520
Speaker 4: I have seen a tied up used condom in the

582
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:33,680
Speaker 4: Gulf of Mexico, obviously, and I was like standing there

583
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:37,200
Speaker 4: staring at it, yes, on spring Break. And then I

584
00:27:37,240 --> 00:27:39,280
Speaker 4: heard a person next to me be like of course,

585
00:27:39,359 --> 00:27:41,320
Speaker 4: and I looked and it was I think her name

586
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 4: was Paula from the Real World.

587
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 1: Okay.

588
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:46,080
Speaker 4: She was like there, like you remember where they used

589
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:48,200
Speaker 4: to send real world people to spring Break?

590
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:49,119
Speaker 5: Yes, I love it.

591
00:27:49,080 --> 00:27:49,920
Speaker 2: And they would be like.

592
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,719
Speaker 4: No offense because and now I am this age, but

593
00:27:52,840 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 4: we were like twenty and they were like forty years old.

594
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:57,400
Speaker 4: Like a capoco.

595
00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:02,000
Speaker 1: You're like, who are you? Are you here for this?

596
00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:03,280
Speaker 6: I do love.

597
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 4: I do love when you're like, oh, I'm gonna litter

598
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:07,080
Speaker 4: this condom, I should tie it in a knot so

599
00:28:07,200 --> 00:28:08,199
Speaker 4: my comstays in it.

600
00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:12,040
Speaker 5: Gotta play it nice, Gotta play nice. I was an

601
00:28:12,160 --> 00:28:13,439
Speaker 5: RA in college.

602
00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,760
Speaker 1: I was an RA and they gave ras a box,

603
00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 1: a huge box of condoms every semester, just to give

604
00:28:18,359 --> 00:28:20,960
Speaker 1: out to and then they would give you instructions out

605
00:28:21,040 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 1: how to cut uh condoms into dental dams. You know

606
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:27,960
Speaker 1: that thing that everybody uses all the time, right, I

607
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:32,280
Speaker 1: love a dental dam. I had this one guy. I

608
00:28:32,280 --> 00:28:36,080
Speaker 1: had freshman I had a twenty plus freshman boys, and

609
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:37,800
Speaker 1: they were all really cool. And there's this one kid

610
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,000
Speaker 1: who partied a lot. He had a beer pong table

611
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:41,280
Speaker 1: in his room even though it was eighteen. I just

612
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:42,560
Speaker 1: looked the other way because he was like a really

613
00:28:42,640 --> 00:28:46,960
Speaker 1: nice guy, and I was like, you are. But I

614
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,760
Speaker 1: wrote dead mice on the box of condoms. So every

615
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:51,480
Speaker 1: time they would ask for condoms, I just hold up

616
00:28:51,480 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 1: this box that said dead mice and they would take

617
00:28:53,200 --> 00:28:55,800
Speaker 1: as many as they wanted me. So this kid, one night,

618
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 1: it's like midnight. I'm like, it's Friday night. I was

619
00:28:59,040 --> 00:29:02,080
Speaker 1: more of a Monday to third party drinking guy myself.

620
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,840
Speaker 1: I kind of stayed in on the weekends and and

621
00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:07,440
Speaker 1: I hear this knock on my door, really loud, drunken knock,

622
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:11,080
Speaker 1: and open it's this residents girlfriend. My resident is so drunk,

623
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:13,960
Speaker 1: like he's like fall down drunk. He's like, I need condoms,

624
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:18,280
Speaker 1: and his girlfriend's just like rolling her eyes, like please

625
00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:21,600
Speaker 1: don't have any. And so I bring out the dead

626
00:29:21,640 --> 00:29:26,160
Speaker 1: mice box. He grabs a fistful maybe thirty condoms, and

627
00:29:26,320 --> 00:29:28,920
Speaker 1: they stumble back down the hallway. I close the door

628
00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 1: and about I don't know. Twenty seconds later, I just

629
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:33,480
Speaker 1: hear him yell.

630
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:36,320
Speaker 5: I'm gonna fuck you so hard.

631
00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:40,800
Speaker 1: So I walk down to make sure everything's okay. Because

632
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 1: the door's over I can hear it. So and I

633
00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:45,920
Speaker 1: go in and he's passed out on his bed. The

634
00:29:46,040 --> 00:29:49,320
Speaker 1: condoms are all over the floor. She's standing there with

635
00:29:49,360 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 1: her arms crossed, looking at him like this frickin idiot.

636
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:55,360
Speaker 2: He screamed it as he passed down.

637
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:58,320
Speaker 1: That passed out with him second snoring, and I'm like,

638
00:29:58,360 --> 00:29:59,040
Speaker 1: are you okay?

639
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 5: She's like I'm fine.

640
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:03,600
Speaker 1: He does this, and then I go She goes, do

641
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:05,680
Speaker 1: you want the condoms back? And I go Now they're free,

642
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:07,480
Speaker 1: you can keep them. And she looks at me. She goes,

643
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: I'm gonna steal his cigarettes? Will you tell him? And

644
00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 1: I was like no, and she's like all right, cool,

645
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 1: have a good night.

646
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 4: I was like, you have and then you told this

647
00:30:15,920 --> 00:30:16,959
Speaker 4: story at their wedding.

648
00:30:17,200 --> 00:30:21,360
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, And he screamed it again and fell asleep

649
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:21,920
Speaker 1: on the altar.

650
00:30:22,040 --> 00:30:23,880
Speaker 5: He's a consistent guy.

651
00:30:24,800 --> 00:30:28,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, but guys like this dude still like he's still

652
00:30:28,760 --> 00:30:31,160
Speaker 4: doing that to whoever he is with, of course, Like

653
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,160
Speaker 4: he's like, we went to the Cubs game or whatever

654
00:30:34,200 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 4: the fuck it is like that one day of the

655
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,160
Speaker 4: year where they're like, I will block out and ruin

656
00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 4: my wife's wake.

657
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:43,520
Speaker 6: Love that love that energy.

658
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:46,040
Speaker 1: Yes, and she knew, but the look on her face

659
00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 1: was like it's fine.

660
00:30:47,600 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 5: He's an idiot. I should be doing better, but we're in.

661
00:30:50,640 --> 00:30:53,440
Speaker 2: I'm going to take and she didn't stay.

662
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:56,200
Speaker 4: It's not safe to be walking around in college campus

663
00:30:56,240 --> 00:30:59,160
Speaker 4: at night, girl, And I guess you got those cigarettes.

664
00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:02,720
Speaker 3: You're out of there, all right? You want to hear

665
00:31:02,800 --> 00:31:04,840
Speaker 3: one more before we I'll tease one.

666
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,080
Speaker 5: Before we go down to give us.

667
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:07,760
Speaker 4: Oh.

668
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:12,840
Speaker 3: Florida woman arrested for masturbating outside of Chicken Shop twice

669
00:31:12,880 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 3: in one month.

670
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:18,200
Speaker 5: Well that's bananas.

671
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:28,440
Speaker 4: You're just.

672
00:31:37,800 --> 00:31:49,719
Speaker 3: Baa ladies and gentlemen. We are back from Bananas. I

673
00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 3: have a few things I wanted to say, okay before,

674
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,760
Speaker 3: of course, go to our Instagram and follow us on

675
00:31:55,840 --> 00:32:00,200
Speaker 3: Instagram The Bananas Podcast, rate and review.

676
00:31:59,880 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 2: Us on Apple Podcasts. It really does matter. Do you

677
00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:03,840
Speaker 2: have any shout.

678
00:32:03,680 --> 00:32:07,160
Speaker 1: Outs, Scottie, Yes, I have a shout out for East

679
00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 1: Banana Land, the micronation we're trying to form. We have

680
00:32:11,720 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 1: we have legal counsel assisting us now, Carly in Chicago.

681
00:32:15,280 --> 00:32:17,640
Speaker 1: I think she's the greatest lawyer in Chicago, and she

682
00:32:18,000 --> 00:32:20,800
Speaker 1: is doing everything to make sure that East Banana Land

683
00:32:20,800 --> 00:32:22,920
Speaker 1: the micronation is becoming a reality.

684
00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:26,320
Speaker 5: And Kurt, I think it will awesome.

685
00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:28,480
Speaker 3: And I got a phone call on the Banana phone

686
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:33,160
Speaker 3: where the guy just went, hey, listen, East Banana Land

687
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:37,280
Speaker 3: doesn't sound real. You gotta call it East Banana Land,

688
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:40,880
Speaker 3: all right, scot what you will.

689
00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,360
Speaker 1: But I got plans. I think we're gonna buy some land.

690
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:46,080
Speaker 1: We're gonna set up a sovereign nation. We're gonna have passports,

691
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:48,320
Speaker 1: we're gonna have currency, We're probably gonna have an airstream

692
00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 1: handing out coffee. I don't know we're gonna make East

693
00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:53,360
Speaker 1: Banana Land happen. And I have one more shout out.

694
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:56,240
Speaker 1: I just want to shout out the Boys Latin lacrosse team.

695
00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:59,200
Speaker 1: My cousin, Brian Ferrell, is the head coach. They won

696
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:02,840
Speaker 1: the state championapionship this year, probably about three weeks ago

697
00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: by the time this comes out, but they were the

698
00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:09,840
Speaker 1: underdogs against Spaulding and they whooped their butts. So congrats

699
00:33:09,840 --> 00:33:13,160
Speaker 1: to Brian and Boys Latin. It's amazing. It's a big deal.

700
00:33:13,800 --> 00:33:14,760
Speaker 1: Very proud of him.

701
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:16,960
Speaker 3: So this is what I just wanted. This is my

702
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 3: shout out. This was a tex that came into the

703
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:25,160
Speaker 3: Banana fib. Hi guys, I'm Brian from New York. I

704
00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:27,640
Speaker 3: just wanted to tell you that you both gave me

705
00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:31,160
Speaker 3: a fantastic last day with my grandmother, Helen Wow. She

706
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:33,440
Speaker 3: spent the last month of her life in the hospital

707
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,840
Speaker 3: and passed away in April at the age of ninety two.

708
00:33:36,320 --> 00:33:39,360
Speaker 3: She and I were a lot alike, except I always

709
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,520
Speaker 3: at least try to be optimistic against her pessimism. Otherwise

710
00:33:43,520 --> 00:33:45,600
Speaker 3: we had very similar minds. She would ask me about

711
00:33:45,600 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 3: the news, what was going on in the world that day,

712
00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:49,440
Speaker 3: and I didn't want to waste the short amount of

713
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:52,400
Speaker 3: time I had to visit each day talking about horrible

714
00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 3: story Wow, So I decided to go into your Instagram page.

715
00:33:56,320 --> 00:33:59,040
Speaker 3: I started reading her headlines and we were cracking up.

716
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 3: She was particular Glory, fond of the bear, breaks into

717
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:06,280
Speaker 3: home plays piano pooring one. When I was told I

718
00:34:06,320 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 3: had to leave, she asked if there was any more

719
00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:10,080
Speaker 3: we could look through the next time, and I said

720
00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:12,440
Speaker 3: there were plenty. But that actually turned out to be

721
00:34:12,480 --> 00:34:15,239
Speaker 3: the last day that we were able to talk each other.

722
00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 3: The next day, I have my first vaccine and I

723
00:34:19,239 --> 00:34:21,319
Speaker 3: was feeling some bad side effects, so I stayed home

724
00:34:21,360 --> 00:34:23,040
Speaker 3: to rest. And the day after that she was doing

725
00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:26,720
Speaker 3: much worse and we couldn't speak together. I just needed

726
00:34:26,719 --> 00:34:28,480
Speaker 3: to tell you both that you helped me make my

727
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:31,560
Speaker 3: last real subsistuent day with my grandmother so much more

728
00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:33,160
Speaker 3: memory than it otherwise would have been.

729
00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 2: Thank you both so much.

730
00:34:34,360 --> 00:34:37,360
Speaker 4: That is like a that almost is so beautiful. It

731
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:38,480
Speaker 4: seems like you made it up.

732
00:34:38,600 --> 00:34:41,840
Speaker 6: Kurt was so moving.

733
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:43,839
Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm from New York.

734
00:34:46,280 --> 00:34:47,080
Speaker 1: That is so that.

735
00:34:47,640 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 2: That got me.

736
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:50,120
Speaker 4: That was amazing.

737
00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,640
Speaker 2: That got me real. That got me real, and she's like.

738
00:34:52,600 --> 00:34:54,920
Speaker 6: That bear sucks at piano. Fuck him.

739
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:55,560
Speaker 2: I love that.

740
00:34:55,920 --> 00:34:59,400
Speaker 1: Yes, well, Banana of the week, it's a it's a

741
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:02,319
Speaker 1: small yes, sure, it's a but Brian, thank you for

742
00:35:02,400 --> 00:35:04,440
Speaker 1: taking the time to let us know.

743
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 5: Always good to go out with a laugh. That's beautiful.

744
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, thank you so much.

745
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:16,879
Speaker 3: Now A hard left her well like this.

746
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,320
Speaker 4: I think, Helen, we're talking about Yeah.

747
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:22,759
Speaker 2: Let's talk about talk about your life. Yeah, what says

748
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:23,400
Speaker 2: about your packcast?

749
00:35:23,480 --> 00:35:28,000
Speaker 4: I honestly think that this podcast, in the lifetime podcasts

750
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:31,880
Speaker 4: are sister pieces because the things that happen in lifetime

751
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:35,200
Speaker 4: movies are so outrageous, like the one that so we

752
00:35:35,280 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 4: watch a different movie every week, and sometimes my mom

753
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:40,640
Speaker 4: listens to the podcast, does not watch the movies, but

754
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,399
Speaker 4: she'll be like, what happened on this week? And I'm like, oh,

755
00:35:43,560 --> 00:35:46,279
Speaker 4: on this week, a woman was having visions that she

756
00:35:46,600 --> 00:35:50,000
Speaker 4: murdered a woman, and then she realized that her husband

757
00:35:50,120 --> 00:35:53,720
Speaker 4: actually murdered the woman and then hypnotized her to believe

758
00:35:53,760 --> 00:35:56,400
Speaker 4: that she did it and he's trying to kill her

759
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,680
Speaker 4: and hypnotized her daughter to kill herself. Like it's like

760
00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:03,480
Speaker 4: the headlines I guess are less fun than you know,

761
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:07,200
Speaker 4: masturbating outside of a chicken shack, but they seem in

762
00:36:07,239 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 4: the same newspaper, you know, like woman has sexsomnia and

763
00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:15,040
Speaker 4: walks to neighbor's house and has sex with him and

764
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:21,120
Speaker 4: then walks back like nothing happened. Yes, Lifetime in East.

765
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:25,400
Speaker 3: Banana Lens ban.

766
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:28,760
Speaker 4: Bananoland East bananoland is a city in the Lifetime universe,

767
00:36:29,040 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 4: and all movies need to be ripped from the headlines there.

768
00:36:33,560 --> 00:36:36,280
Speaker 5: Yes, that's so funny. That's such a great idea.

769
00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:39,640
Speaker 1: Those movies are just and they also get great ratings,

770
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:43,160
Speaker 1: Like people watch those movies absolutely.

771
00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:46,839
Speaker 4: And they have a wide range of stars. Like if

772
00:36:47,040 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 4: I have to pull up the IMDb page before I

773
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:51,480
Speaker 4: watch every movie because you're like, oh, we're going to

774
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:54,719
Speaker 4: see an ant from Sabrina the Teenage Witch having sex

775
00:36:54,760 --> 00:36:57,080
Speaker 4: with an underage ass score, you know, like that is

776
00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:00,239
Speaker 4: what Lifetime is giving you. But you're watching these people

777
00:37:00,239 --> 00:37:02,440
Speaker 4: and you're like, how do I remember this person? It's

778
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 4: like someone that was on a kid's show is now,

779
00:37:06,239 --> 00:37:11,440
Speaker 4: you know, undercover trying to bust Yes, exactly exactly. Someone

780
00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:14,879
Speaker 4: my friend was like, did you cover? Mother may sleep

781
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:16,759
Speaker 4: with danger? I'm like we did the reboot, which is

782
00:37:16,800 --> 00:37:19,840
Speaker 4: about lesbian vampires.

783
00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:24,000
Speaker 1: Whoa I would how did they come?

784
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:27,800
Speaker 4: And James Franco wrote it. I mean we're talking star studded.

785
00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 3: Oh wow, Well, so you do you cover one movie

786
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 3: per episode.

787
00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:37,279
Speaker 4: And Naomi and I watch a movie and then we

788
00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:43,720
Speaker 4: we really break down. We judge the fashions and every

789
00:37:43,920 --> 00:37:48,200
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh. But it's a true escape from the

790
00:37:48,280 --> 00:37:51,920
Speaker 4: world today because you're like, I'm I'm not gonna kill

791
00:37:52,360 --> 00:37:55,000
Speaker 4: my neighbor and then put her in a coffin and

792
00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:56,840
Speaker 4: then have sex with her husband and a plane on

793
00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 4: top of her body. You know, I'm not gonna do that,

794
00:37:59,120 --> 00:38:01,560
Speaker 4: and so to me, I'm already doing.

795
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:05,200
Speaker 5: Well, that's right, that's great.

796
00:38:05,360 --> 00:38:08,200
Speaker 1: Well, if you ever got any guests, uh, Megan and

797
00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:10,760
Speaker 1: Chilie Rose. Challie Rose was I think in a Lifetime

798
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:12,000
Speaker 1: Christmas movie.

799
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 4: So to get into it, we talked about it, Yes,

800
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 4: and we are have Fran Drusher was in one, so

801
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:22,040
Speaker 4: we're having Fran Dresser. Yeah. A Fox has a whole

802
00:38:22,080 --> 00:38:26,960
Speaker 4: lifetime series of movies. So yeah, it is really fun

803
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:30,600
Speaker 4: to reconnect with actors you loved and then people you'd

804
00:38:30,640 --> 00:38:33,799
Speaker 4: forgotten about. Stephen from the original Laguna beach like that

805
00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:39,760
Speaker 4: reality show. He played a crime author in a movie.

806
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:41,320
Speaker 2: It's fun.

807
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:44,920
Speaker 3: Oh that's great, so it's called I Love a Lifetime movie.

808
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 3: Go and subscribe, folks, please, do.

809
00:38:49,600 --> 00:38:50,600
Speaker 2: You want to hear about this woman?

810
00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, Florida woman arrested for masturbating outside of chicken shop

811
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:58,960
Speaker 3: twice in one month. This now, listen, we get our

812
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:05,200
Speaker 3: share here at of masturbating women outside of happens a lot. Honestly,

813
00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:08,799
Speaker 3: we get them a lot. But mostly when I read them,

814
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:13,719
Speaker 3: I read them and I say, oh, this person, this

815
00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:16,960
Speaker 3: person is sick. Wasn't all there? And the reason I

816
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:18,120
Speaker 3: chose this one.

817
00:39:18,680 --> 00:39:20,080
Speaker 5: Is because it was all there.

818
00:39:21,000 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 3: They go out of their way to specify that she

819
00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:28,920
Speaker 3: does not have a history of mental she quote showed

820
00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:31,239
Speaker 3: no sign of being drunk or under the influence of drugs.

821
00:39:31,400 --> 00:39:33,680
Speaker 2: There was no evidence of mental health issues.

822
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:38,719
Speaker 3: This is a healthy woman expressing her desire to repeatedly

823
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:40,839
Speaker 3: masturbate completely.

824
00:39:40,320 --> 00:39:42,800
Speaker 2: Naked outside of a Popeye's restaurant.

825
00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:43,880
Speaker 6: Completely naked.

826
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:47,719
Speaker 4: Wow, Okay, interesting because that is not needed, you.

827
00:39:47,719 --> 00:39:51,320
Speaker 3: Know exactly, Yeah, you can be. This was sent in

828
00:39:51,440 --> 00:39:54,640
Speaker 3: by Kate Donald on Instagram. Thank you, Kate. This is

829
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:59,439
Speaker 3: published on something called Bold with an e at the end.

830
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:03,160
Speaker 3: And this was written by Phoebe Harp, Florida.

831
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:05,840
Speaker 5: Phoebe, this is the best I've ever heard of in

832
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 5: this business.

833
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:09,879
Speaker 3: A Florida woman was arrested twice in one month after

834
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:13,200
Speaker 3: she was caught masturbating in public. Vanessa Le Jones of Newport,

835
00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:15,800
Speaker 3: Richie was first arrested for pleasuring herself outside of a

836
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:17,799
Speaker 3: seven to eleven in front of a man and his

837
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:18,480
Speaker 3: young nephew.

838
00:40:18,719 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 2: That's not he works. Later, not good.

839
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:23,439
Speaker 3: She was caught doing the exact same thing, this time

840
00:40:23,480 --> 00:40:25,719
Speaker 3: outside of a Popeye's restaurant.

841
00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:28,920
Speaker 2: Number one. Prosecutors tried to give her the benefit of

842
00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 2: the doubt.

843
00:40:29,520 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 3: First time she was caught, authorities chose not to pursue

844
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:35,480
Speaker 3: criminal charges against Jones.

845
00:40:34,239 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 4: They were like, listen to nephew liked it.

846
00:40:37,400 --> 00:40:40,840
Speaker 6: So we're giving an old slap on the puss.

847
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:42,399
Speaker 4: You know what I mean for this one.

848
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:49,920
Speaker 3: And there is the title of today's episode, all slap

849
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:54,799
Speaker 3: on the puss Number two. I love this, I love

850
00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:57,680
Speaker 3: this article. I want to compliment Phoebe Harper because she

851
00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:01,000
Speaker 3: just numbers the things you should take away from you

852
00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 3: number two. Unfortunately, she wasn't so lucky the second time.

853
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:07,920
Speaker 3: Next time, she was caught going to town on herself

854
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:10,920
Speaker 3: near a Popeye's dumpster. Not only that, but she was

855
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:13,400
Speaker 3: fully naked this time. A police report revealed this. She

856
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:15,360
Speaker 3: showed no signs of being drunk or under the influence

857
00:41:15,360 --> 00:41:17,600
Speaker 3: of no evidence of mental health issues.

858
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:20,600
Speaker 2: This time she could be in serious trouble.

859
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:24,120
Speaker 3: It's like a maybe a ten thousand dollars fine, and

860
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 3: something tells me she might offend again in the future.

861
00:41:27,280 --> 00:41:30,200
Speaker 3: Given that Jones was found quote smirking when she was

862
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:34,479
Speaker 3: caught end quote continuously rubbing her vagina in the seven

863
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:37,319
Speaker 3: one a lot when she was caught outside Popeyes, it

864
00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 3: seems like she gets out a rush, a rush out

865
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:40,760
Speaker 3: of doing this in public.

866
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:44,480
Speaker 4: Now okay, now Phoebe's editorializing a little bit. Now you know,

867
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 4: Phoebe's like, I think she's gonna strike again.

868
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:53,120
Speaker 3: I want to tell you that she is almost the

869
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:55,120
Speaker 3: photo I will post on the Instagram. She is almost

870
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 3: a dead ringer for the woman that I dated for

871
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:00,000
Speaker 3: two years.

872
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:02,680
Speaker 4: So this is a babe.

873
00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:07,959
Speaker 3: I mean, she is not not ugly, she's not unattractive,

874
00:42:08,120 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 3: she's an attractive.

875
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:12,480
Speaker 1: Wow, she can do more than romancing, say a fast

876
00:42:12,480 --> 00:42:15,680
Speaker 1: food chicken restaurant exactly. Yeah.

877
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 4: In her defense, though, it's like, listen, we all know schools.

878
00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:22,439
Speaker 4: You can't even if you got a wedgie there, don't

879
00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:25,360
Speaker 4: pick it too close if it's if it's recess or whatever.

880
00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:29,040
Speaker 4: But it's like, if you say a Popeye's dumpster, I go,

881
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:31,520
Speaker 4: that seems like a perfectly fine place to rub one out.

882
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,920
Speaker 4: I wouldn't want to not on the floorida see humidity,

883
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:37,279
Speaker 4: they got those no seaum bugs, they'll get all up

884
00:42:37,280 --> 00:42:41,400
Speaker 4: in there. But Popeye's dumpster, to me, there's no law

885
00:42:41,640 --> 00:42:45,520
Speaker 4: against that. Where's the law that says you can't show.

886
00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:47,760
Speaker 5: No law that says you can show me the law?

887
00:42:49,280 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 4: She goes, okay, outside of the seven eleven. No, that's

888
00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 4: behind back of the Popeyes. I thought we were cool here.

889
00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:01,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, this seems to buy the dumps. If you

890
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:05,080
Speaker 3: can't do stuff that's a little risque by the dumpster

891
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:07,160
Speaker 3: of the Popeyes, where can you do it?

892
00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:08,160
Speaker 2: Florid out?

893
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:12,320
Speaker 1: I know that's a really wild story. Nudity is jarring.

894
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:16,120
Speaker 1: It sounds like it's what did it say, fellony or misdemeanor.

895
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:18,080
Speaker 1: It sounded like it was a misdemeanor fellony.

896
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:22,600
Speaker 4: Oh boy, thousand dollars. Fine, she's gonna find a dude

897
00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:24,480
Speaker 4: to pay that in thirty seconds.

898
00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:26,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, if she has a gofund me, this is

899
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:30,359
Speaker 1: going to get go funded by the employees at Popeyes.

900
00:43:30,360 --> 00:43:34,839
Speaker 3: And she in her in her like, uh, you know

901
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:37,240
Speaker 3: her mugshots. She's got a good smile.

902
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:38,440
Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, she's like.

903
00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:42,760
Speaker 6: And we don't know what she does for a living.

904
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:44,160
Speaker 2: We do not know.

905
00:43:45,120 --> 00:43:51,520
Speaker 1: Wow, middle school assisted It's crazy. You never see how

906
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:54,080
Speaker 1: the magician does it. They're always distracted.

907
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:56,920
Speaker 4: I hope she got some free chicken sandwiches though, because

908
00:43:56,920 --> 00:43:59,840
Speaker 4: those puppies are good to extra spicy.

909
00:44:00,239 --> 00:44:01,320
Speaker 6: Wash your hands, Vanessa.

910
00:44:02,040 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 5: Ah.

911
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:05,719
Speaker 3: When I first saw this, I was like, oh my god,

912
00:44:05,760 --> 00:44:08,160
Speaker 3: is that you know? Like, I was like, is that

913
00:44:08,680 --> 00:44:10,439
Speaker 3: I'm not going to say her name, but I thought

914
00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:10,920
Speaker 3: it could be.

915
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:15,319
Speaker 2: I did. I did think it could have been.

916
00:44:15,400 --> 00:44:17,000
Speaker 4: Does this seem like something she would do?

917
00:44:19,560 --> 00:44:21,399
Speaker 3: So I will tell you this story. So we were

918
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:26,359
Speaker 3: in Tasmania. We were teaching uh improv in Tasmani. We're

919
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:29,880
Speaker 3: teaching theater in Tasmani for two weeks and in this

920
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:32,759
Speaker 3: teeny tiny of town. We went on vacation after we

921
00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:36,640
Speaker 3: taught and we're in this teeny Timetown, middle of nowhere, tasmane.

922
00:44:37,440 --> 00:44:39,960
Speaker 1: I honestly can't the way I'm picturing.

923
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 4: I'm only thinking the big city in Tasmania.

924
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 3: Sure, yeah it is, it's outside. I'm trying to remember

925
00:44:49,640 --> 00:44:51,520
Speaker 3: what the name of that city is. Like there's two

926
00:44:51,560 --> 00:44:54,880
Speaker 3: of them, Hobart's one and there's something else. But so

927
00:44:54,960 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 3: this is like you were in the sticks, you know,

928
00:44:57,120 --> 00:45:00,160
Speaker 3: it's just like if there's wombats everywhere and fuck and

929
00:45:00,920 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 3: like kangaroos are jumping all around, or the little kangaroos

930
00:45:03,680 --> 00:45:08,040
Speaker 3: wallabies and they're like about a twenty five minute drive

931
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:11,520
Speaker 3: is like the one pharmacy for like that one hundred

932
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:15,200
Speaker 3: kilometer or wow and uh and we had a bit

933
00:45:15,400 --> 00:45:19,800
Speaker 3: of a pregnancy skoll okay, and so we drove the

934
00:45:19,840 --> 00:45:21,480
Speaker 3: twenty five minutes into the pharmacy.

935
00:45:21,560 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 2: We go in, there's one person working the store.

936
00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:26,759
Speaker 3: We have of course we like look around looking for

937
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:30,200
Speaker 3: the pregnancy test kits and of course cannot find them.

938
00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:32,280
Speaker 3: So then have to go up to the one sixteen

939
00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:33,879
Speaker 3: year old kid who works there and it's like, where

940
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,080
Speaker 3: are your pregnancy kits? And then he like shows it

941
00:45:36,120 --> 00:45:36,920
Speaker 3: to us and we buy it.

942
00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:39,960
Speaker 4: And Australia like Is it like a little like pregnancy

943
00:45:39,960 --> 00:45:41,240
Speaker 4: test coming out of a kangaroo?

944
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:45,840
Speaker 3: Right, does it have a Yeah, that'd be cute, that'd

945
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:49,240
Speaker 3: be so cute you pee into the jimmy hole whatever.

946
00:45:49,640 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 5: I don't know.

947
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:52,879
Speaker 3: I definitely it's definitely not called a jimmy hole. What's

948
00:45:52,920 --> 00:45:54,920
Speaker 3: the baby baby kangaroos called.

949
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:58,800
Speaker 2: A joey joey the joey pouch?

950
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:01,880
Speaker 3: Okay, I think, yeah, So we get it, We get it,

951
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,040
Speaker 3: we take it home. She takes a pregnant test, she's

952
00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,960
Speaker 3: not pregnant. That night she gets her period, so then

953
00:46:07,160 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 3: always and she doesn't have any tampons.

954
00:46:09,480 --> 00:46:11,280
Speaker 2: So then we drive the next morning.

955
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:13,799
Speaker 6: You gotta get the tampons when you're getting the pregnancy test.

956
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 6: Everybody knows that wet.

957
00:46:16,239 --> 00:46:19,839
Speaker 3: We drive twenty five minutes, same kids working, We get

958
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:22,680
Speaker 3: we then we come home.

959
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:23,160
Speaker 1: Huh.

960
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,360
Speaker 3: And then the very next day she has an appointment

961
00:46:26,719 --> 00:46:28,239
Speaker 3: and we have to then go pick she has a

962
00:46:28,320 --> 00:46:30,799
Speaker 3: point with a doctor. She has to pick up her

963
00:46:32,120 --> 00:46:37,400
Speaker 3: her uh, her medication uh, and it's uh and it's antidepressants,

964
00:46:38,120 --> 00:46:38,720
Speaker 3: and so then.

965
00:46:38,719 --> 00:46:39,840
Speaker 2: We got to go back in.

966
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:44,640
Speaker 3: It's the same year old kid, and now we're buying antidepressants.

967
00:46:44,680 --> 00:46:47,880
Speaker 3: So it very much looks like we very much wanted

968
00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:50,560
Speaker 3: a child. We found out we did not have a child,

969
00:46:50,760 --> 00:46:54,960
Speaker 3: and now are on anti depress it's because of like

970
00:46:55,000 --> 00:46:56,920
Speaker 3: this one little town in Tasmania.

971
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:58,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, she should have just adopted that kid.

972
00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:01,759
Speaker 5: At that point, just like you're coming us, you know

973
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 5: too much.

974
00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:06,920
Speaker 4: Have you guys ever seen a woman masturbating? I've seen sure,

975
00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:09,640
Speaker 4: hundreds of men. Oh my gosh, this isn't this is

976
00:47:09,719 --> 00:47:13,200
Speaker 4: this happened to me last week. My friend was wasted

977
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:15,640
Speaker 4: and was like, everybody, come back to my place, which

978
00:47:15,680 --> 00:47:19,239
Speaker 4: is like a new fun And so then you're just

979
00:47:19,320 --> 00:47:22,440
Speaker 4: collecting people, you know, You're like, come one, come all,

980
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:25,000
Speaker 4: haven't seen you in ten years. Come to my friend's house.

981
00:47:25,040 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 4: She's wasted, I don't care. And so five of us

982
00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 4: go back to her house. She has a balcony, it's

983
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 4: facing another balcony, and there is a man, lights on curtains,

984
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 4: wide open, fully nude, masturbating on his couch for forty

985
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:41,800
Speaker 4: five minutes.

986
00:47:41,960 --> 00:47:43,640
Speaker 5: No what not good?

987
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:44,719
Speaker 1: What?

988
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:47,400
Speaker 6: At one point we were like it seemed like maybe

989
00:47:47,440 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 6: was coming.

990
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:51,640
Speaker 4: And then because it's like me moved, but like we didn't,

991
00:47:51,960 --> 00:47:54,160
Speaker 4: and like we could see everything. So we're like, maybe

992
00:47:54,880 --> 00:47:57,919
Speaker 4: and then he immediately started masturbating again, and like.

993
00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 6: We couldn't carry on a conversation with each other.

994
00:48:00,080 --> 00:48:03,480
Speaker 4: It was just five of us drinking Margarita's watching this

995
00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:06,799
Speaker 4: man mastermate and try and get his dog out of

996
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:07,120
Speaker 4: the room.

997
00:48:07,239 --> 00:48:10,120
Speaker 2: Oh was he conscious of you being there?

998
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 4: That's what is That's I don't know how he couldn't

999
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:18,080
Speaker 4: be And he didn't seem that fucked up, but it

1000
00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:25,600
Speaker 4: seemed so like on display, so purposeful. And I and

1001
00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:28,640
Speaker 4: I keep asking my friend like, have you seen that

1002
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,479
Speaker 4: man again? And she's like, no, I don't know where

1003
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 4: he went.

1004
00:48:32,040 --> 00:48:32,560
Speaker 3: You're god.

1005
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:36,279
Speaker 4: It was long and and so he was in the

1006
00:48:36,320 --> 00:48:38,640
Speaker 4: living room and then we could see the curtains of

1007
00:48:38,680 --> 00:48:42,040
Speaker 4: the bedroom closed, which made me think there's a significant

1008
00:48:42,040 --> 00:48:43,360
Speaker 4: other asleep in the bedroom.

1009
00:48:43,440 --> 00:48:43,879
Speaker 1: I see.

1010
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:45,560
Speaker 2: Interesting.

1011
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:48,040
Speaker 1: I mean, was it all comics? Was it five?

1012
00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:49,719
Speaker 4: Yes? Well five comedians.

1013
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:53,879
Speaker 1: Best case scenario for the audience involved people that are

1014
00:48:53,920 --> 00:48:56,440
Speaker 1: steadying it, cracking jokes, drinking marks.

1015
00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:57,359
Speaker 6: Oh we were.

1016
00:48:57,600 --> 00:49:01,680
Speaker 4: We were eating snacks. I was having walk them away

1017
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:05,719
Speaker 4: while watching the stranger, you know, just jerking in his

1018
00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:07,600
Speaker 4: like very nice Brooklyn apartment.

1019
00:49:07,840 --> 00:49:10,120
Speaker 6: That was like it was it was nice for him

1020
00:49:10,120 --> 00:49:10,480
Speaker 6: to have the.

1021
00:49:10,400 --> 00:49:12,880
Speaker 4: Curtains open for us to just sort of see the

1022
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:14,160
Speaker 4: architecture in there.

1023
00:49:14,200 --> 00:49:16,080
Speaker 1: Nobody in New York. Everybody in New York knows. In

1024
00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:18,440
Speaker 1: New York, you know that if your window, if your

1025
00:49:18,480 --> 00:49:21,160
Speaker 1: blinds are open, there's a potential audience. He was having

1026
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 1: a he wanted a little voyeur action on, and.

1027
00:49:24,040 --> 00:49:25,240
Speaker 6: He was on the ground floor.

1028
00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:29,520
Speaker 2: So it's like, oh, you know, like that's purposeful.

1029
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:32,200
Speaker 4: If anything, the rats are stopping and looking at you

1030
00:49:32,560 --> 00:49:35,320
Speaker 4: at this point. That's right, forty five minutes.

1031
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 6: I was worried about him.

1032
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:37,960
Speaker 3: Though I was worried about it, I didn't be worried too.

1033
00:49:38,000 --> 00:49:39,320
Speaker 3: That seems like too much friction.

1034
00:49:39,640 --> 00:49:41,799
Speaker 4: I've never seen a lady. I've never seen a lady

1035
00:49:41,840 --> 00:49:42,280
Speaker 4: in the wild.

1036
00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 3: Lots of men, I've never seen a lady. Oh you

1037
00:49:44,239 --> 00:49:46,279
Speaker 3: never seen a lady in the wild, master bait. You've

1038
00:49:46,280 --> 00:49:47,480
Speaker 3: seen a lady masturbate?

1039
00:49:47,960 --> 00:49:51,239
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, absolutely, I've never seen a lady.

1040
00:49:51,000 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 6: In the wild.

1041
00:49:51,920 --> 00:49:52,160
Speaker 4: You know.

1042
00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:54,800
Speaker 6: Yes, no means never a target parking lot.

1043
00:49:54,640 --> 00:49:55,680
Speaker 2: Like I who said that?

1044
00:49:55,719 --> 00:49:57,640
Speaker 1: Because I saw one in the Whole Foods parking lot

1045
00:49:57,680 --> 00:49:59,600
Speaker 1: on Santa Monica Boulevard about.

1046
00:49:59,280 --> 00:50:00,080
Speaker 5: Seven years ago.

1047
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:02,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, just in her car, Yeah, just I was walking by,

1048
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:03,960
Speaker 1: and it was very clear what was going on. And

1049
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:07,600
Speaker 1: I mean everybody's walking by, but I noticed things and

1050
00:50:07,680 --> 00:50:09,960
Speaker 1: I was like, well how about that, and just kept

1051
00:50:10,040 --> 00:50:10,479
Speaker 1: on going.

1052
00:50:10,560 --> 00:50:13,280
Speaker 5: I didn't say anything, wow, because that's.

1053
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 4: In your car.

1054
00:50:13,840 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 5: That's just having a moment, right.

1055
00:50:16,239 --> 00:50:17,520
Speaker 4: That's public, that's private.

1056
00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:19,520
Speaker 2: No, I don't know. I don't know.

1057
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,360
Speaker 4: If you know why, I need to know the legality.

1058
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:22,319
Speaker 4: I'm not going to do that.

1059
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:25,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know, but it is a good question, right,

1060
00:50:25,600 --> 00:50:27,440
Speaker 3: Like you own the car, but you don't own the

1061
00:50:27,520 --> 00:50:28,680
Speaker 3: land underneath.

1062
00:50:28,400 --> 00:50:32,560
Speaker 1: In your garage. Guys, I don't think so. But hey,

1063
00:50:32,560 --> 00:50:34,200
Speaker 1: she wasn't there when I got back. So hey, you

1064
00:50:34,239 --> 00:50:35,120
Speaker 1: know in and.

1065
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:37,520
Speaker 4: Out Whole Foods, that's a that's a step up. I mean,

1066
00:50:38,000 --> 00:50:40,880
Speaker 4: that's where this lady needs to go. Seven eleven Popeyes

1067
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:46,239
Speaker 4: that's another step up. Oh that hot bar, that'll get

1068
00:50:46,239 --> 00:50:46,840
Speaker 4: me excited.

1069
00:50:47,800 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, should we wrap it up tight, Curtie, Let's

1070
00:50:51,600 --> 00:50:53,439
Speaker 1: see what we got. I found a lot of good

1071
00:50:53,440 --> 00:50:58,240
Speaker 1: stories this week. How about hmmm, Oh, this one's fun

1072
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:02,640
Speaker 1: man drug text South Carolina Aquarium Education number with some

1073
00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:07,080
Speaker 1: decent questions. So this was written by Chase Lawden's lagger

1074
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:16,040
Speaker 1: for WC sb sent in by many many bananimals, including one.

1075
00:51:15,880 --> 00:51:19,720
Speaker 5: Copyhste Charleston, South Carolina.

1076
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:22,640
Speaker 1: The South Carolina Aquarium on Monday shared a screenshot of

1077
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:27,560
Speaker 1: messages sent to the quote ask and uh ask an

1078
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:30,520
Speaker 1: aquarium educator. So basically, it's a number where you can

1079
00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:32,040
Speaker 1: text people that work at the aquarium.

1080
00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:33,640
Speaker 5: They give you aquarium facts.

1081
00:51:33,760 --> 00:51:36,439
Speaker 6: The man probably, yeah, probably misused a lot.

1082
00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:39,279
Speaker 1: Yes, since we have the banana phone, we know what

1083
00:51:39,480 --> 00:51:42,920
Speaker 1: lengths people will go to. The man who was currently

1084
00:51:42,960 --> 00:51:45,680
Speaker 1: at the corner of Market and meeting his text said,

1085
00:51:46,080 --> 00:51:47,920
Speaker 1: I asked the educator, I'm going to read you some

1086
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: of the things this very drunk inebriated man sent in.

1087
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 1: I'm going to actually read you.

1088
00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:55,920
Speaker 5: The text exchange.

1089
00:51:56,000 --> 00:51:58,279
Speaker 1: So here it goes. I'm currently at the corner of

1090
00:51:58,320 --> 00:52:01,279
Speaker 1: Market and meeting. What I have seen around me ten

1091
00:52:01,320 --> 00:52:04,480
Speaker 1: thousand years years ago, before the area was settled by humans.

1092
00:52:04,680 --> 00:52:06,880
Speaker 5: Also that when was the area settled?

1093
00:52:07,520 --> 00:52:07,799
Speaker 1: Is there?

1094
00:52:07,960 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 3: I mean, I mean, sorry, it doesn't seem like he's drunk.

1095
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:16,560
Speaker 3: It seems like he's on a little bit of mushrooms

1096
00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:17,080
Speaker 3: around Uh huh.

1097
00:52:17,120 --> 00:52:19,040
Speaker 2: That's what it seems like to me. But it's cool

1098
00:52:19,040 --> 00:52:20,440
Speaker 2: because he's I love those questions.

1099
00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 1: He sends eight text messages before he gets a response,

1100
00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:25,880
Speaker 1: which is also great. Is there something unique to the

1101
00:52:25,920 --> 00:52:29,400
Speaker 1: Low Country that those who study marine life are fascinated by?

1102
00:52:29,640 --> 00:52:30,840
Speaker 5: You know that question?

1103
00:52:30,920 --> 00:52:35,799
Speaker 1: We're all thinking on what subjects to marine biologists disagree? Fascinating?

1104
00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:38,839
Speaker 1: There must be some generally agreed upon things, but what

1105
00:52:38,920 --> 00:52:42,840
Speaker 1: theories are currently being debated? Also, why do seahorses grab

1106
00:52:42,920 --> 00:52:45,200
Speaker 1: anything they can with their prehensile tails?

1107
00:52:46,440 --> 00:52:47,640
Speaker 5: It's a good strain of thought.

1108
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:53,480
Speaker 4: Is he like a disbarred marine biologist? Yes, like he

1109
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:57,719
Speaker 4: has so much info for a just drunk man on

1110
00:52:57,800 --> 00:52:58,240
Speaker 4: the corner.

1111
00:52:58,400 --> 00:52:58,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know.

1112
00:52:58,800 --> 00:53:01,200
Speaker 3: It's like, why does he horses grab anything with their

1113
00:53:01,239 --> 00:53:04,000
Speaker 3: prehends hotaels answer me, Nancy.

1114
00:53:04,840 --> 00:53:05,360
Speaker 5: I know you.

1115
00:53:06,400 --> 00:53:09,280
Speaker 1: And finally, why should I only eat oysters and months

1116
00:53:09,320 --> 00:53:12,520
Speaker 1: that contain the letter R? Something that I've heard many times?

1117
00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:16,320
Speaker 1: So the phone responds, thank you for all your questions.

1118
00:53:16,320 --> 00:53:18,400
Speaker 1: Ten thousand years ago, South Carolina would.

1119
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:19,680
Speaker 5: Have seen the end of the ace age.

1120
00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:22,719
Speaker 1: Sea horses like to use their tails to hold on

1121
00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:24,799
Speaker 1: because they aren't very good swimmers and they might get

1122
00:53:24,840 --> 00:53:26,879
Speaker 1: tossed around in the currents if they aren't holding on.

1123
00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:29,480
Speaker 1: And here's the oysters. One that I'm sure a lot

1124
00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:31,920
Speaker 1: of ban animals are just wolfing down oysters now that

1125
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:35,440
Speaker 1: the grand reopening is happening. As for oysters, this quote

1126
00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:38,400
Speaker 1: rule end quote comes from the fact that bacteria that

1127
00:53:38,520 --> 00:53:41,120
Speaker 1: is harmful to humans is more likely to be present

1128
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:45,600
Speaker 1: during warmer seasons than when they are months that end

1129
00:53:45,680 --> 00:53:49,000
Speaker 1: with R, So waiting for the months to end with

1130
00:53:49,200 --> 00:53:50,319
Speaker 1: R also allows for.

1131
00:53:50,719 --> 00:53:52,840
Speaker 5: Spat, which is a baby oyster.

1132
00:53:55,120 --> 00:53:58,440
Speaker 1: I did not know that until this exact second to

1133
00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:02,680
Speaker 1: reach an appropriate size for populations to recover before harvest.

1134
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:03,680
Speaker 5: Thank you for your answers.

1135
00:54:03,719 --> 00:54:05,440
Speaker 1: And then the guy right back he goes.

1136
00:54:05,280 --> 00:54:07,160
Speaker 5: Thank you so much for all your answers. My wife

1137
00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:07,840
Speaker 5: should be happy.

1138
00:54:07,880 --> 00:54:10,480
Speaker 1: I'm drunk. I drunk text aquariums and not other women.

1139
00:54:11,760 --> 00:54:13,840
Speaker 5: Okay, he's got a point.

1140
00:54:14,760 --> 00:54:19,680
Speaker 4: Ye, he's got a wife too. It's always surprising.

1141
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:24,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, and also shocking that there is an animal called

1142
00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:27,239
Speaker 3: a sea horse who lives in the ocean and is

1143
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:32,759
Speaker 3: not a good That's their whole deal is that they

1144
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:34,600
Speaker 3: have to be in the water all the time and

1145
00:54:34,600 --> 00:54:35,359
Speaker 3: they're bad ass.

1146
00:54:35,560 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 5: Have not evolved, This lie crazy as this.

1147
00:54:39,680 --> 00:54:43,560
Speaker 4: Guy has definitely cheated on his wife before. He's like, see, look,

1148
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:46,520
Speaker 4: I'm texting their aquery. It's like, you shouldn't be that

1149
00:54:46,600 --> 00:54:47,360
Speaker 4: proud of yourself.

1150
00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:48,279
Speaker 2: I agree.

1151
00:54:48,520 --> 00:54:50,680
Speaker 1: I agree. We get a lot of those stories too,

1152
00:54:50,840 --> 00:54:52,759
Speaker 1: Like there was one about China not having like the

1153
00:54:52,760 --> 00:54:55,160
Speaker 1: ability of time travel, and it's like Chinese officials insists

1154
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:57,080
Speaker 1: they do not know how to time travel, and it's like,

1155
00:54:57,160 --> 00:55:01,600
Speaker 1: well then you do. It's like, my lucky wife, I'm

1156
00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:03,880
Speaker 1: not cheating right now. It's like, meanwhile, he's just firing

1157
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:06,279
Speaker 1: off the same questions like six women, and they're like.

1158
00:55:06,680 --> 00:55:10,040
Speaker 2: Stop, did you see that other one?

1159
00:55:10,080 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 3: Somebody sent this in and it was it was a

1160
00:55:13,960 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 3: guy who got back to New York. He was a

1161
00:55:16,680 --> 00:55:20,960
Speaker 3: UK British guy and then went to text yes, all

1162
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:24,040
Speaker 3: of the women that he had last spoken to on

1163
00:55:24,800 --> 00:55:31,200
Speaker 3: Tinder in twenty nineteen. But I either by accident or

1164
00:55:31,239 --> 00:55:35,959
Speaker 3: he didn't understand or purposefully literally just texted all of.

1165
00:55:35,880 --> 00:55:37,400
Speaker 1: The group text. It was even roop.

1166
00:55:37,320 --> 00:55:41,480
Speaker 3: Text, just like no, hello, I met we connected on

1167
00:55:41,560 --> 00:55:44,120
Speaker 3: Tinder in twenty nineteen. But then the great chore happened.

1168
00:55:44,120 --> 00:55:46,560
Speaker 3: Are you guys interested in hanging out now? And then

1169
00:55:46,640 --> 00:55:49,160
Speaker 3: everyone was just like is this a group text with

1170
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:50,440
Speaker 3: twenty women?

1171
00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 5: Busted?

1172
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:57,240
Speaker 1: Got him? Oh, we're all man, we're all choar, brain fog,

1173
00:55:57,360 --> 00:55:58,560
Speaker 1: we're all coming out of it.

1174
00:55:59,640 --> 00:56:00,880
Speaker 2: Oh, look at that.

1175
00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:03,560
Speaker 5: We did another bananas.

1176
00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:05,160
Speaker 2: We did another bananas.

1177
00:56:05,440 --> 00:56:08,120
Speaker 4: Feel good, feel good, Megan, tell us.

1178
00:56:08,000 --> 00:56:10,520
Speaker 2: Tell us everything, plug everything once.

1179
00:56:10,360 --> 00:56:15,640
Speaker 4: More, and it's oh god, my Instagram is at better,

1180
00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:21,000
Speaker 4: Megan Gaily. My Twitter is Megan Gaily. Please watch Pause

1181
00:56:21,320 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 4: on HBO on Friday at nine pm. Wow, I can't

1182
00:56:25,160 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 4: believe I know that. And then please listen to I

1183
00:56:28,360 --> 00:56:30,000
Speaker 4: Love a Lifetime movie.

1184
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:31,920
Speaker 5: Beautiful, Yeah, beautiful.

1185
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:34,239
Speaker 4: I learned that. I learned add an aquarium once you

1186
00:56:34,320 --> 00:56:38,399
Speaker 4: can't rub too far low on a dolphin, and the

1187
00:56:38,680 --> 00:56:41,640
Speaker 4: marine biologist said, you don't want to start something you

1188
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:45,799
Speaker 4: can't finish. Hello to just a group of children, that's

1189
00:56:45,840 --> 00:56:47,440
Speaker 4: what her explanation was.

1190
00:56:47,920 --> 00:56:49,600
Speaker 2: So you were a child when they said that.

1191
00:56:50,200 --> 00:56:53,040
Speaker 4: And I didn't know what it meant then, but now

1192
00:56:53,080 --> 00:56:54,719
Speaker 4: I know it means you're not gonna be able to

1193
00:56:54,719 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 4: fuck that dolphin.

1194
00:56:55,600 --> 00:56:57,399
Speaker 6: So don't get that dolphin excited to fuck.

1195
00:56:58,520 --> 00:57:02,320
Speaker 5: Go to Popeyes, find it, dump, or finish your own work.

1196
00:57:03,600 --> 00:57:05,640
Speaker 5: Thanks Megan, loved having Megan.

1197
00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:08,640
Speaker 2: You were a delight. What a real treat to have

1198
00:57:08,680 --> 00:57:09,080
Speaker 2: you on.

1199
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:10,040
Speaker 4: Thank you so much.

1200
00:57:10,719 --> 00:57:22,440
Speaker 1: Now, Bananas, this has been an exactly right production produced

1201
00:57:22,480 --> 00:57:23,800
Speaker 1: and engineered by Katie.

1202
00:57:23,640 --> 00:57:26,800
Speaker 2: Levine, theme music by Kahon, and all of our artwork

1203
00:57:26,880 --> 00:57:28,120
Speaker 2: is done by Travis Millard.

1204
00:57:28,360 --> 00:57:31,040
Speaker 1: You can follow us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast,

1205
00:57:31,080 --> 00:57:33,240
Speaker 1: where we post stories every day and things that we

1206
00:57:33,320 --> 00:57:34,760
Speaker 1: don't cover on the podcast.

1207
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:38,800
Speaker 3: Listen, subscribe, and please leave us a review on Apple podcast, Stitcher,

1208
00:57:38,880 --> 00:57:40,360
Speaker 3: or wherever you get your podcast.

1209
00:57:40,640 --> 00:57:43,720
Speaker 1: And if you're interested in advertising on Bananas, please email

1210
00:57:43,800 --> 00:57:46,720
Speaker 1: us at the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. That's

1211
00:57:46,840 --> 00:58:00,840
Speaker 1: the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. As what There

1212
00:58:01,160 --> 00:58:01,440
Speaker 1: Never

1213
00:58:03,640 --> 00:58:03,680
Speaker 4: M