WEBVTT - Episode Highlight: UD Explains How Much Losing His Parents Effected Him

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I mean, I tell my son all the time. Man,

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<v Speaker 1>the key to anything that you want to do is

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<v Speaker 1>just the consistency. Yeah, just being consistent. Don't trust me.

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<v Speaker 1>Trust the work.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>I could tell you anything that's right, You can tell

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<v Speaker 1>them anything, but trust the work that you put in.

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<v Speaker 1>Consistent work you put it in, and you'll start to see.

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<v Speaker 2>The results, you know what you did until your point

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<v Speaker 2>with that.

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<v Speaker 3>Man, I think a lot of times our kids dismiss

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<v Speaker 3>who we are.

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<v Speaker 1>Man. God damn boy, my son won't listen to me

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<v Speaker 1>for shit, you know, a strange as the liquor store listen.

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<v Speaker 2>We just pops to them, you know.

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<v Speaker 3>And that's a it's a catch twenty two because like

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<v Speaker 3>being present in your children's lives, in their lives sometimes,

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<v Speaker 3>like you know, they don't know what it's like to

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<v Speaker 3>not have that influence, that protection, that leadership that guide us.

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<v Speaker 3>And because they hear our voice so much, you know

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<v Speaker 3>what I mean, they can shut us down sometimes.

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<v Speaker 2>So I think it takes a village.

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<v Speaker 3>That's why you got to have the right people around

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<v Speaker 3>them to echo the message, because I don't want them

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<v Speaker 3>to get the lesson, I mean, the message just from me,

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<v Speaker 3>you know what I mean, I want to I want

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<v Speaker 3>them to get the lesson in it without having to

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<v Speaker 3>experience failure, experienced hardships. I want them to get it

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<v Speaker 3>along the way. So just be patient with them.

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<v Speaker 2>Boys. Man, you got some good boys.

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<v Speaker 1>I got some good boys. But I mean, I'm happy

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<v Speaker 1>you touched on this because we talk about just being pops,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, to them, you know what I'm saying. So

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<v Speaker 1>I was able to be there, you know, with you

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<v Speaker 1>and for you through one of your toughest times when

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<v Speaker 1>you lost your father, Yes, sir, and then you know,

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<v Speaker 1>fast tracked years later and I lose my father. You

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<v Speaker 1>know what I'm saying. You know, we talk about our

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<v Speaker 1>kids and we talk about those moments, and you think

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<v Speaker 1>that you have any eternity with them, and you think,

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<v Speaker 1>I would never thought that I'd be sitting here right

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<v Speaker 1>now with my father, my stepmother, and my mother all deceased.

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<v Speaker 1>So you think that you'll have an eternity with them.

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<v Speaker 1>But just talk about the influence and the impact that

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<v Speaker 1>your father had on you, because you know, besides basketball, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we're talking about work ethic, getting up every day, his

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<v Speaker 1>own flower shop. But like those skills, that mindset, those habits, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>are the reason why you could succeed in basketball because

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<v Speaker 1>you take that mindset, you take those habits, and you

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<v Speaker 1>apply that somewhere else. Yeah, but talk about Pops and

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<v Speaker 1>how he instilled that in you, even though it wasn't

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<v Speaker 1>all the time that you might have wanted, it was

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<v Speaker 1>enough time, oh yeah, to mow you into the man

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<v Speaker 1>that you are.

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<v Speaker 2>For sure.

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<v Speaker 3>Look, I would have taken you know, thirty years with

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<v Speaker 3>my Pops in one hundred years, would have dead, be dead.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, you know.

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<v Speaker 3>He was present, he was active, he was fun, he

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<v Speaker 3>was loving, he was caring.

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<v Speaker 2>He handled adversity.

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<v Speaker 3>I think, you know, seeing him go through adversity, especially

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<v Speaker 3>in the early nineties, really helped me through this phase

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<v Speaker 3>of life, of my phase of adversity.

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<v Speaker 2>And the way that he was able to carry it.

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<v Speaker 3>Number one still show up, number two and then third

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<v Speaker 3>bounce back.

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<v Speaker 2>So having that Pops in your life, I really feel.

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<v Speaker 3>Like it gives you an advantage on manhood, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>because you don't have to learn certain things on the fly.

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<v Speaker 3>You get to learn from their experience and their mistakes.

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<v Speaker 3>So I'm thankful I had my dad as long as

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<v Speaker 3>I had them. I miss him a whole bunch. I

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<v Speaker 3>think The thing that I missed most about like his

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<v Speaker 3>consistency of checking up on me. He knew my schedule,

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<v Speaker 3>he knew how to find me. He always encouraged me.

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<v Speaker 3>But I think what I miss probably the most is

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<v Speaker 3>his sense of humor. He's a shit talk of extraordin there.

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<v Speaker 3>He could talk to anyone at any time. And I

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<v Speaker 3>really miss my father. I miss your father, man, and

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<v Speaker 3>I'm so thankful. You know, we got to share that

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<v Speaker 3>little time and space together because the pride that you

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<v Speaker 3>would see on their face when we will walk out

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<v Speaker 3>after the games, you know, you know, I could go

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<v Speaker 3>back to like high school when they would talk shit

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<v Speaker 3>to each other, you know, and things like that. So

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<v Speaker 3>like to have that experience and then have it on

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<v Speaker 3>an NBA level, Man, Kudos to our fathers, man, they

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<v Speaker 3>really showed up and showed out.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean for me, Bro, and I think about, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>just the person I am today and the things that

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<v Speaker 1>I'm doing and the things that I'm you know, accomplishing.

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<v Speaker 1>It's because they prepared me, Bro that Like when my

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<v Speaker 1>father passed away, I wasn't confused. I was obviously I

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<v Speaker 1>was in pain, I was hurt, but I wasn't confused

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<v Speaker 1>about what to do next. You know, so many times

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<v Speaker 1>oftentimes you have adults that lose their parents and they

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<v Speaker 1>don't know what to do next. They're lost, they're confused.

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<v Speaker 1>I understood the mission completely, you know what I'm saying.

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<v Speaker 1>Like they raised me that kind of man. So regardless

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<v Speaker 1>of whether I was in pain, I knew to get

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<v Speaker 1>my ass up and I knew to keep pushing forward.

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<v Speaker 1>And I knew what I had to do. And I

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<v Speaker 1>had to leave my family. I got to take care

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<v Speaker 1>of my brothers. I gotta take care of my sisters.

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<v Speaker 1>I got to make sure that everybody good over here.

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<v Speaker 1>I got to make sure that Mom's house still good.

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<v Speaker 1>I got to make sure we still get together on Thanksgiving.

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<v Speaker 1>I got to I know what the mission is. They

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<v Speaker 1>prepared me for that, it was. It was no confusion

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<v Speaker 1>at all. So now I see what those years was about,

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<v Speaker 1>what they were building, what they were preparing me for,

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<v Speaker 1>whether they was gonna be here or not. Knew that

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<v Speaker 1>I was gonna be ready to be the man that

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<v Speaker 1>they needed me to be.

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<v Speaker 2>That's right, you know what I'm saying.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, So, when I was scoring twenty five and my

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<v Speaker 1>daddy said, you ain't got to kill an instinct you

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<v Speaker 1>should just go thirty five, those kind of habits of

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<v Speaker 1>never settling.

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<v Speaker 3>Never settling. I remember when I was putting my arm

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<v Speaker 3>in the room. My daddy said, yeah, Bubbo, you dunking

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<v Speaker 3>that bit. But I don't want you dunking it like this.

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<v Speaker 3>I want you dunking that bitch like this. I'm like, damn,

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<v Speaker 3>I can't never satisfy them on the never satisfying on

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<v Speaker 3>the court. But man, I really miss that now, Man

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<v Speaker 3>I really missed that. I really miss that. And I

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<v Speaker 3>think one of the lessons that we can learn from

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<v Speaker 3>them that maybe they didn't teach us is as black men,

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<v Speaker 3>as successful black men who have a lot of responsibility

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<v Speaker 3>to do a little bit more self care, right, because

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<v Speaker 3>like we check out a lot earlier than every other

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<v Speaker 3>demographic on the planet, and so like, you know, what

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<v Speaker 3>can we do to have longevity. It's not it's good

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<v Speaker 3>to have success, but you want to have long success.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, So are we getting our checkups? Are we getting

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<v Speaker 2>our pro state check?

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<v Speaker 3>Are we eating the right way? Are we exercising? Are

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<v Speaker 3>we diet and are we getting the right sleep? Are

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<v Speaker 3>we stress managing all those holistic things that you learn

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<v Speaker 3>along the way that maybe they didn't have the information.

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<v Speaker 2>Have you healed from trauma?

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<v Speaker 1>Man?

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<v Speaker 3>And things like that, right, and so on top of

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<v Speaker 3>the lessons that they taught us, what can we build

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<v Speaker 3>off of to leave a better legacy and equip our

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<v Speaker 3>kids for the next love phase of life?

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<v Speaker 1>And I think that's that's an important message that you

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<v Speaker 1>brought there. One thing that you brought up earlier is

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<v Speaker 1>talking about being four miles from the beach. But it

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<v Speaker 1>seems so far away, right, I tell people all the time,

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<v Speaker 1>I've never been in South Beach. I got in the NBA. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>people think we grow up on South Beach.

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<v Speaker 2>No, that's not da Hey.

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<v Speaker 1>We don't go over there, man, we do not go

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<v Speaker 1>over there at all.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's not day count.

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<v Speaker 1>That is not that is not Miami at all. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>And it's so different, man, like just kind of growing

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<v Speaker 3>up in the eighties, you know what I mean. Like

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<v Speaker 3>one of the I always remember me and you when

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<v Speaker 3>we get into it. We're talking back and for man

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<v Speaker 3>from you know.

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<v Speaker 2>What I'm saying, like that that was a turn back

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<v Speaker 2>in the day.

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<v Speaker 1>Today, you know what I'm saying.

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<v Speaker 3>So then, Like, but the thing about it is, man, like,

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<v Speaker 3>you grow up in this culture of South Florida. Sports

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<v Speaker 3>and basketball and football give you an opportunity to compete

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<v Speaker 3>with some of the best young athletes. And then you

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<v Speaker 3>get exposed to the streets because, like you know, it

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<v Speaker 3>was the eighties, so it was it was it was

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<v Speaker 3>wide open down here. So you saw the car culture,

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<v Speaker 3>the don'ts, you saw, you know what I mean, the

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<v Speaker 3>strip club culture and all those different things. You know,

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<v Speaker 3>and we jumped off the porch real early. So you know,

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<v Speaker 3>in doing that, you.

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<v Speaker 2>Get exposed to a lot.

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<v Speaker 3>So you probably saw some things that you shouldn't have seen,

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<v Speaker 3>experienced some things that you shouldn't have experienced, and you

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<v Speaker 3>kind of carry that, right, you kind of carry that

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<v Speaker 3>into the next phase of your life, and if you're

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<v Speaker 3>not careful, at some point it'll catch up with you.

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<v Speaker 1>This is true.

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<v Speaker 2>This is true.

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<v Speaker 1>So now you drafted number ten, that's right, you feel

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<v Speaker 1>like you made it somewhat.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't get invited to the draft.

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<v Speaker 3>No I didn't get the experience, you know, shaking David

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<v Speaker 3>Stern's hand.

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<v Speaker 2>No I didn't.

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<v Speaker 1>You didn't get invited. I did, sound like you still

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<v Speaker 1>salty about that. I know you're not. I know you not.

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<v Speaker 1>I know you now you sound like you're still salty

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<v Speaker 1>about that.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, man, you want the full experience.

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<v Speaker 1>You know.

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<v Speaker 3>I didn't get to go to the combine. I didn't

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<v Speaker 3>get to go, you know, to the draft and things

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<v Speaker 3>like that. Even though I was considered a lottery pick,

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<v Speaker 3>in one of the top draft prospects. It just didn't

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<v Speaker 3>work out for me that way.

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<v Speaker 1>So you didn't get invited because I ain't get drafted,

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<v Speaker 1>So I don't know, So you didn't get invited.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't get invited to the draft?

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<v Speaker 1>What about the draft combines?

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<v Speaker 3>The combine, it was like, okay, you have to play

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<v Speaker 3>in it, and if you're a lottery pick.

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<v Speaker 1>You just did specific workouts.

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<v Speaker 2>Just go work out for teams.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm one of the top fifteen prospects, so I wasn't

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<v Speaker 3>gonna go and play against the second rounder. Yeah you

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<v Speaker 3>know what I mean, or potential under It did me

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<v Speaker 3>nothing for my potential in my upside. So because I

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<v Speaker 3>didn't do that, I didn't go to test so I

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<v Speaker 3>didn't get that experience. But I got to share that

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<v Speaker 3>moment with my family and so that was a beautiful

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<v Speaker 3>thing about it. But yeah, I mean, you want to

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<v Speaker 3>always get a chance to you know, shake the court.

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<v Speaker 1>I know you did.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we turned up that I know you did.

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<v Speaker 1>Talk about it about it, got damn talk about it.

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<v Speaker 2>Turned up that night. You know.

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<v Speaker 3>We had a good time, but more so for me.

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<v Speaker 3>You know, at that phase of life, man, it was

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<v Speaker 3>really just trying to get us out of poverty.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, shit had got rough.

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<v Speaker 3>My dad had a stroke my freshman year and things

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<v Speaker 3>like that, and I was looked at as the bread

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<v Speaker 3>winner in the family. And it's a lot of responsibility

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<v Speaker 3>when you're seventeen years old, man, and you're responsible, you know,

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<v Speaker 3>financially for your family, inspirationally for your family, and not

0:09:44.720 --> 0:09:47.440
<v Speaker 3>to minimize you know, everybody else in the family, because

0:09:47.440 --> 0:09:50.920
<v Speaker 3>everybody held it down as best as they could. But

0:09:51.000 --> 0:09:53.160
<v Speaker 3>it was a unique situation. I had a unique talent.

0:09:54.000 --> 0:09:56.120
<v Speaker 3>But yeah, we had a good time. I flew out

0:09:56.160 --> 0:09:59.400
<v Speaker 3>to Cali, got got up with Demos and Q you know,

0:09:59.440 --> 0:10:02.240
<v Speaker 3>a day or two after the draft, and yeah, man,

0:10:02.280 --> 0:10:05.000
<v Speaker 3>we turned up. You know, probably a little bit too much.

0:10:05.080 --> 0:10:07.800
<v Speaker 1>I was gonna say, talk about that, Earl Boykins, Cordmugatti, Yeah,

0:10:07.880 --> 0:10:10.439
<v Speaker 1>Miles le bar Q Rich like y'all would loaded man

0:10:10.600 --> 0:10:14.400
<v Speaker 1>talk about that? Headbands? Yeah, like it was a vibe.

0:10:14.480 --> 0:10:16.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was a vibe man, the Clippers.

0:10:16.120 --> 0:10:18.719
<v Speaker 3>Man, it was a lot of fun being in la

0:10:18.800 --> 0:10:23.160
<v Speaker 3>It's a beautiful place, got a lot to offer, great weather,

0:10:23.880 --> 0:10:27.480
<v Speaker 3>and we were all doing things for the first time together.

0:10:28.040 --> 0:10:29.760
<v Speaker 3>So we did a lot of cooking out, a lot

0:10:29.800 --> 0:10:32.599
<v Speaker 3>of barbecuing, a lot of playing the video game, a

0:10:32.640 --> 0:10:36.920
<v Speaker 3>lot of hanging out. We vibe, right, but the infrastructure

0:10:37.160 --> 0:10:39.480
<v Speaker 3>was not there for us to develop as players.

0:10:39.480 --> 0:10:42.360
<v Speaker 1>You couldn't got you got Chicago, you got East Saint Louis,

0:10:42.400 --> 0:10:44.439
<v Speaker 1>you got New York for a lot of that.

0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:48.640
<v Speaker 3>And we brought it, brought We brought all them elements.

0:10:48.640 --> 0:10:50.920
<v Speaker 3>We brought all them elements to l a bro We

0:10:51.000 --> 0:10:51.360
<v Speaker 3>kicked it.

0:10:51.400 --> 0:10:51.559
<v Speaker 1>Man.

0:10:51.559 --> 0:10:53.800
<v Speaker 3>We had a good time out there, we really did.

0:10:53.960 --> 0:10:56.440
<v Speaker 3>And all of us went on to have long careers.

0:10:56.440 --> 0:10:59.199
<v Speaker 3>That's the thing about it. It's not just about assembling talent.

0:10:59.280 --> 0:11:02.319
<v Speaker 3>Sometimes you got to have the right pieces. And it

0:11:02.440 --> 0:11:04.120
<v Speaker 3>was just too many young players, you know, So it

0:11:04.160 --> 0:11:08.000
<v Speaker 3>was still a lot of internal competition. But man, you're

0:11:08.040 --> 0:11:10.680
<v Speaker 3>talking about like some talented guys.

0:11:11.280 --> 0:11:14.280
<v Speaker 2>I had a ship. Man, I had a lot of fun.

0:11:14.400 --> 0:11:17.040
<v Speaker 1>I mean, that's the right mind. I mean, internal competition

0:11:17.120 --> 0:11:19.400
<v Speaker 1>is how it's supposed to be Iron supposed to shopper iron. Yes,

0:11:19.679 --> 0:11:23.679
<v Speaker 1>every day, every single day, Iron supposed to shop iron.

0:11:23.720 --> 0:11:26.400
<v Speaker 1>Like you know, as much as you know, we talked

0:11:26.400 --> 0:11:29.120
<v Speaker 1>ship to each other. Once we went out of town,

0:11:29.520 --> 0:11:32.240
<v Speaker 1>nobody else could say shit and could nobody say shit

0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:34.120
<v Speaker 1>to be like we we played, we could talk to

0:11:34.120 --> 0:11:36.480
<v Speaker 1>shit each other all day. Yeah, we're gonna go at

0:11:36.520 --> 0:11:38.040
<v Speaker 1>each other all day, for sure, but when we go

0:11:38.080 --> 0:11:39.360
<v Speaker 1>out of town, ain't nobody fit the fuck with you,

0:11:39.400 --> 0:11:40.920
<v Speaker 1>ain't nobody for the fuck with me. But we believe

0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:43.720
<v Speaker 1>in that iron shopping iron ship. Yeah, we believe in that.

0:11:43.760 --> 0:11:46.920
<v Speaker 3>I think about you, u D You know, you've always

0:11:46.960 --> 0:11:49.600
<v Speaker 3>just really been the muscle You've been to Luga Brossi

0:11:50.200 --> 0:11:52.960
<v Speaker 3>of this ship for years. Man, you know, like the

0:11:53.040 --> 0:11:57.080
<v Speaker 3>loyalty and the love and the compassion and the the

0:11:57.160 --> 0:12:00.800
<v Speaker 3>oversight that you had. You took it personal, being from

0:12:00.880 --> 0:12:03.240
<v Speaker 3>down here right to represent it. So you wanted all

0:12:03.240 --> 0:12:08.760
<v Speaker 3>our guys to feel safe, comfortable, protected, and.

0:12:07.240 --> 0:12:08.679
<v Speaker 2>You stood on that.

0:12:08.840 --> 0:12:11.000
<v Speaker 3>A lot of things we can't even talk about, because

0:12:11.040 --> 0:12:13.000
<v Speaker 3>like you did a lot of things behind the scenes

0:12:13.559 --> 0:12:15.760
<v Speaker 3>that allowed a lot of guys, you know what I mean,

0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:18.240
<v Speaker 3>passes down here to be able to you know, breathe.

0:12:18.320 --> 0:12:20.160
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I connected with the right people, and that's

0:12:20.160 --> 0:12:22.320
<v Speaker 1>why I won't leave today. And people always talk about,

0:12:22.360 --> 0:12:24.160
<v Speaker 1>you know, the opportunities that I had to leave. Man,

0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:25.920
<v Speaker 1>the love that I get from the city. You can't

0:12:25.920 --> 0:12:28.120
<v Speaker 1>put a price tag on that. Yeah, I can go anywhere.

0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:29.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't need know security. You know what I'm saying.

0:12:29.960 --> 0:12:31.840
<v Speaker 1>I'm connected to the people. You know what I'm saying.

0:12:31.920 --> 0:12:35.000
<v Speaker 1>So now that I'm retired, I'm gonna get them back

0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:39.360
<v Speaker 1>everything they gave to me. Affordable housing, the medical marijuana.

0:12:39.400 --> 0:12:41.360
<v Speaker 1>Stop going to jail. Stop going to jail for weed.

0:12:41.440 --> 0:12:44.079
<v Speaker 1>My brothers, we ain't got time for that. Life. It's

0:12:44.120 --> 0:12:46.640
<v Speaker 1>legal now, go get your card, get your paperwork, understanding

0:12:46.679 --> 0:12:48.440
<v Speaker 1>the law. You know what I'm saying, all that shit,

0:12:48.760 --> 0:12:50.320
<v Speaker 1>I'll make sure we got all that. We ain't got

0:12:50.360 --> 0:12:52.440
<v Speaker 1>to worry about jobs. Stop hustling. We gonna get jobs

0:12:52.440 --> 0:12:54.679
<v Speaker 1>out here. We don't give you opportunities. Now. You just

0:12:54.679 --> 0:12:56.720
<v Speaker 1>got to make choices, Make the right choices. But I'm

0:12:56.760 --> 0:12:58.520
<v Speaker 1>gonna get the city back everything they gave to me.

0:12:58.640 --> 0:13:01.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, man, it is spring cleaning.

0:13:01.840 --> 0:13:05.400
<v Speaker 4>Isn't just for finally tossing that fedora you swore would

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