1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:04,560 Speaker 1: Now here's a highlight from coast to coast AM on iHeartRadio. 2 00:00:04,760 --> 00:00:06,960 Speaker 2: Maybe I should look at this in the opposite type 3 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:10,000 Speaker 2: of way, and maybe this is not what these type 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,520 Speaker 2: of books are meant for. But what are some things 5 00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:14,840 Speaker 2: I shouldn't be doing? Like, let's look at the don'ts. 6 00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:17,279 Speaker 2: Do you have any advice for they stay away from 7 00:00:17,280 --> 00:00:19,760 Speaker 2: this type of stuff because it's not helping you. 8 00:00:20,880 --> 00:00:24,639 Speaker 3: Well, I would say, don't use the book to prop. 9 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:25,080 Speaker 4: Up a table. 10 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:29,040 Speaker 5: You know, I would say, don't use it to warm 11 00:00:29,080 --> 00:00:30,400 Speaker 5: your house in the fireplace. 12 00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 6: Uh huh. 13 00:00:32,680 --> 00:00:34,600 Speaker 4: But but no, I don't have a lot of don'ts. 14 00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:38,000 Speaker 5: This This book is not designed to beat people over 15 00:00:38,040 --> 00:00:38,360 Speaker 5: the head. 16 00:00:38,400 --> 00:00:40,320 Speaker 4: But you know, don't do this, do that. 17 00:00:40,880 --> 00:00:44,560 Speaker 5: It's telling my story of when I have lived on 18 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,239 Speaker 5: and when I have lived off and the realization that 19 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:49,240 Speaker 5: everybody has. 20 00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:51,080 Speaker 4: This switch in their brain. And you hear people talk 21 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:51,519 Speaker 4: about it. 22 00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:55,120 Speaker 5: Sometimes it's from the podium after a game, you know, 23 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:57,400 Speaker 5: a basketball or football game. Hey, you know I flipped 24 00:00:57,400 --> 00:00:59,680 Speaker 5: the switch or the switch went off, or I had a. 25 00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 4: Moment or epiphany. 26 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:05,640 Speaker 5: It's that switching your brain and your brain itself that 27 00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:07,160 Speaker 5: drives everything from there. 28 00:01:07,319 --> 00:01:09,320 Speaker 4: You know, your brain drives your body. 29 00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:11,840 Speaker 5: Whoever your thoughts are is where kind of the rest 30 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:17,200 Speaker 5: of you gravitates towards. So hopefully you don't have negative 31 00:01:17,200 --> 00:01:21,039 Speaker 5: thoughts and gravitate that way. But the idea is to 32 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:25,720 Speaker 5: use this switch that you have, use the energy, the passion, 33 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:29,520 Speaker 5: whatever your purpose is, towards something positive because if people 34 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 5: do that, I just think this world will be a 35 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:34,920 Speaker 5: better place. People will be less miserable, people will be 36 00:01:34,959 --> 00:01:39,560 Speaker 5: happier and feel that they're getting more out of their life. 37 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:41,680 Speaker 5: They're getting their money's worth, so to speak. So that's 38 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:44,840 Speaker 5: really the main focus there. But when I talk about 39 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:48,000 Speaker 5: on versus OP, that's the whole life switch concept, and 40 00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:49,720 Speaker 5: that's why I named it that because I think it's 41 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:54,000 Speaker 5: something you could really imagine in your head like a switch. 42 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:55,440 Speaker 4: You can literally flip it on and off. 43 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:58,200 Speaker 5: And I'm not someone to tell you that I'm always on. 44 00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:01,240 Speaker 5: I usually am, but I've had moments where I've been 45 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:02,080 Speaker 5: major lay off. 46 00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:03,520 Speaker 6: Yeah. 47 00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:07,600 Speaker 2: Well, one thing you mentioned about negative thoughts, and it 48 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:12,320 Speaker 2: reminded me of when I was taking my driver's lessons 49 00:02:12,360 --> 00:02:14,200 Speaker 2: when I was, you know, fifteen or whatever it was, 50 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:17,160 Speaker 2: before getting the license at sixteen, and one of the 51 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:19,079 Speaker 2: things they tell you is when you're driving, whatever you're 52 00:02:19,120 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 2: looking at, you tend to veer towards. 53 00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:22,360 Speaker 6: Is that what negative thoughts are like? 54 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 2: If that's what you're paying attention to, If that's what 55 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:28,080 Speaker 2: you're thinking about, naturally you're going to veer towards it. 56 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:31,640 Speaker 2: As a person, is that what you're finding one hundred percent? 57 00:02:31,800 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 5: And it's it's negative or positive, it works both ways. 58 00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 5: So yeah, if you're if you're looking at something, you 59 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:39,640 Speaker 5: are going to start to shift that way. 60 00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,440 Speaker 4: And if it's negativity that. 61 00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:44,280 Speaker 5: You find popping up a lot, I think a lot 62 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 5: of people view to the they skew to the negative. 63 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:50,520 Speaker 4: I do sometimes myself. I don't know why just. 64 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 5: Is that way, but I almost view it like a 65 00:02:53,240 --> 00:02:56,440 Speaker 5: song that pops song You can just skip it, you know, 66 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 5: you can give that song a thumbs down or just 67 00:02:58,919 --> 00:03:00,280 Speaker 5: literally skip that song. 68 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:03,160 Speaker 4: And so why can you not? Why can you not 69 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:04,520 Speaker 4: skip a thought in your brain? 70 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:07,000 Speaker 5: It's a nope, not going to listen to this and 71 00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:09,040 Speaker 5: just skip it right over it. 72 00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:10,359 Speaker 4: And I encourage people to. 73 00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:12,840 Speaker 5: Do that and to think about think about it in 74 00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:14,960 Speaker 5: that way that you don't have to listen to this 75 00:03:15,000 --> 00:03:16,600 Speaker 5: stuff if you don't want to. 76 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:20,600 Speaker 2: What I've noticed too, and we've learned a lot about 77 00:03:20,639 --> 00:03:24,360 Speaker 2: social media in the last five years, especially since the 78 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 2: congressional hearings and a lot of people raising awareness to 79 00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:31,119 Speaker 2: the manipulation that goes on, particularly to young people, which 80 00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:35,880 Speaker 2: is very troubling, and you start to realize that miserable 81 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:38,840 Speaker 2: has a market. So if you are having a problem 82 00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 2: with something, these social media websites, these tech companies can 83 00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:44,360 Speaker 2: pick up on that and they use that as a 84 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:47,440 Speaker 2: marketing plot point to you, as it is just one 85 00:03:47,480 --> 00:03:49,800 Speaker 2: extra thing in your profile that they know they can 86 00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:52,440 Speaker 2: advertise to, which is kind of a shame if you 87 00:03:52,480 --> 00:03:54,920 Speaker 2: think about it, and it's unfortunate. So how can you 88 00:03:55,000 --> 00:03:58,640 Speaker 2: tell if something or someone is taking advantage of you? 89 00:03:58,840 --> 00:04:02,960 Speaker 2: Meaning how can you tell that you know something may 90 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,240 Speaker 2: be holding you back that you don't know is holding 91 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:08,640 Speaker 2: you back. It may seem invisible, but I know that 92 00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:12,280 Speaker 2: there are things out there that do have that effect 93 00:04:12,320 --> 00:04:12,800 Speaker 2: on people. 94 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:16,760 Speaker 5: Yeah, you're right about that, and it's manipulation and it's financed, 95 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:19,680 Speaker 5: and it's terrible because it gets people that their lowest oftentimes, 96 00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:22,800 Speaker 5: And that's another benefit of spending time with yourself. You 97 00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:25,840 Speaker 5: know you're not going to have any AI or or 98 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:29,640 Speaker 5: any kind of marketing. Behavioral marketing go through your own head. 99 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:32,080 Speaker 5: I mean, do you have advertisements in your own brain? 100 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,000 Speaker 5: Of course not, and so you. 101 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:40,000 Speaker 3: Need you, you know, you need to really unplug to 102 00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 3: know for sure that these are real thoughts through yours 103 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,159 Speaker 3: and not being piped or fed in there. 104 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:46,880 Speaker 4: And that's an important thing. 105 00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:48,400 Speaker 5: But you know, I almost got rid of all my 106 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:51,080 Speaker 5: social media before I launched the book because I was 107 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:53,599 Speaker 5: so tired of it and the thoughts that I put 108 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,360 Speaker 5: in my head and the things I was looking at, 109 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:58,040 Speaker 5: the things I was, you know, scrolling through. It. Used 110 00:04:58,040 --> 00:04:59,960 Speaker 5: to tell my kids, if you find me on LinkedIn, 111 00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:03,080 Speaker 5: and I've reached the height of boredom, and please shake 112 00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:05,800 Speaker 5: me out of the state. And now I'm using LinkedIn 113 00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:09,640 Speaker 5: all the time to promote the book. And it's because 114 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:10,800 Speaker 5: of that. You know, if you want to get your 115 00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:13,279 Speaker 5: book out in the world, or anything out in the world, 116 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:15,360 Speaker 5: you've got to get out in the world. And these 117 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:19,239 Speaker 5: days most things are done on mine in the computer world, 118 00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:20,480 Speaker 5: and it drives me crazy. 119 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:22,839 Speaker 4: But that's just where we're at. You know. 120 00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:25,200 Speaker 5: It's like we joke around with all this AI and 121 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,200 Speaker 5: TEX stuff. It's like, have these people not seen the 122 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:30,839 Speaker 5: terminator and the sky network or whatever. 123 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:31,200 Speaker 4: It was called. 124 00:05:31,839 --> 00:05:35,359 Speaker 5: So we're walking walking right into this here, and you know, 125 00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:37,520 Speaker 5: what are you going to do? But when you unplug 126 00:05:37,600 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 5: from all this stuff, you really can find those emotions, 127 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:42,160 Speaker 5: those feelings. 128 00:05:42,360 --> 00:05:44,839 Speaker 4: You know, if it's negative feelings, what do you do 129 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:46,960 Speaker 4: with that? What can you do with that? What shouldn't 130 00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:47,440 Speaker 4: you do? 131 00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 5: And you usually have emotions to say, well, Okay, I 132 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:53,400 Speaker 5: want to be like this or I don't want to 133 00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:55,479 Speaker 5: be like that. Like I give you a short example, 134 00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:59,080 Speaker 5: like I had an abusive father that my mom pulled 135 00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:03,080 Speaker 5: us away from, and I, for whatever reason, I didn't 136 00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:05,600 Speaker 5: have any training. I just decided to use that as 137 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:07,039 Speaker 5: an example. 138 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:09,880 Speaker 4: Of who I didn't want to be and who. 139 00:06:09,920 --> 00:06:11,560 Speaker 5: You know, wanted to be nothing Like I wanted to 140 00:06:11,600 --> 00:06:13,880 Speaker 5: be the best dad I could be, and I would 141 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:14,240 Speaker 5: like the. 142 00:06:14,440 --> 00:06:15,799 Speaker 4: Personal plug for myself. 143 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:18,560 Speaker 5: Think I've done that in my own little world here, 144 00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:20,800 Speaker 5: and that's just something I went through. But I think 145 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 5: for everyone else, you go through something bad. Okay, Yah 146 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:27,400 Speaker 5: had no surprise. Everybody does. But do you want to 147 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:29,800 Speaker 5: perpetuate that or do you want to cut that and 148 00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:32,440 Speaker 5: end that and never have that be that way again? 149 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:35,599 Speaker 5: And I was talking to my brother with Thanksgiving. You know, 150 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:37,680 Speaker 5: my father was so bad. I didn't even know so 151 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:39,520 Speaker 5: much of it because I was two years younger. But 152 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:42,280 Speaker 5: my brother was telling me the story about my dad 153 00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:44,520 Speaker 5: started a pizza fight and the mall years ago. And 154 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,080 Speaker 5: I remember the pizza fight because when two grown men 155 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:49,480 Speaker 5: are throwing pizza at each other, you you know, you think. 156 00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:53,080 Speaker 4: You remember that. And my brother said, do you remember 157 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:53,839 Speaker 4: how that started? 158 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 5: Us said, well, like, the guy bumped into our dad, right, 159 00:06:56,600 --> 00:07:00,360 Speaker 5: and he goes, no, there's this kid on crutches and 160 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,839 Speaker 5: he was coming and our dad was coming and our 161 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 5: dad didn't move. And subsequently, the kid with crutches hits 162 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,320 Speaker 5: my dad's pizza, knocks it over and he starts yelling 163 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:11,560 Speaker 5: at this kid on crutches and his parents, and then 164 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 5: he throws the first. 165 00:07:12,480 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 3: Life and it's just like how could Like it was 166 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:19,160 Speaker 3: years later and not even remembering that part of it, 167 00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 3: I was like embarrassed to be this guy's kid. 168 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:23,320 Speaker 5: You know, I don't know who the kid was in 169 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:25,160 Speaker 5: the mall and all that, but I'm like, how can 170 00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:29,240 Speaker 5: people be so rotten? And again, I just decided I 171 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:30,920 Speaker 5: didn't want to be like this guy at all. And 172 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:33,080 Speaker 5: I think again, for a lot of people, you've gone 173 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,560 Speaker 5: through something. It could be tragic, traumatic, but you can 174 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:38,560 Speaker 5: use that as a catalyst in one way or the other, 175 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:40,480 Speaker 5: either to just be like that, you know, be like 176 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 5: your parent in this example, or be nothing like it. 177 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,400 Speaker 5: And again, it's when you're aware and plugged into that 178 00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:49,880 Speaker 5: moment you can make these choices, these decisions. And I 179 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:51,800 Speaker 5: think life is a series of choices, you know, I 180 00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:55,040 Speaker 5: mentioned option A versus option B. I think generally there's 181 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:58,240 Speaker 5: two broad choices of how you can take things, and 182 00:07:57,760 --> 00:08:01,240 Speaker 5: I think people know what the best choices, but it's 183 00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:02,440 Speaker 5: sometimes not the easiest. 184 00:08:03,480 --> 00:08:05,800 Speaker 6: I have to say, a pizza fight is so absurd. 185 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:09,120 Speaker 2: I shouldn't be laughing at that, but I never encountered 186 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:11,760 Speaker 2: a food fight in real life. Just the concept and 187 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:15,920 Speaker 2: the visual is humorous to me, not the trauma that 188 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 2: comes with it as a child. But you know what 189 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:22,960 Speaker 2: I found too, it's kind of interesting when you emphasize 190 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:27,960 Speaker 2: tuning in and taking the time really looking into yourself. 191 00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 2: But there's so much noise that goes on in the 192 00:08:31,080 --> 00:08:34,760 Speaker 2: world that you mentioned that the first part. If you're 193 00:08:34,800 --> 00:08:37,679 Speaker 2: in your own mind, hopefully the ads don't start creeping in. 194 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:41,880 Speaker 2: It's only a matter of time before it becomes more direct. 195 00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:45,000 Speaker 2: But let's say I'm sitting quietly and I'm going to 196 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:47,480 Speaker 2: think about things like, oh, I haven't had a mcribb 197 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:51,120 Speaker 2: in a while, and because an advertisement will creep in 198 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:54,200 Speaker 2: and like oh yeah, they find ways to get into 199 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:56,480 Speaker 2: your brain if you like it or not. So how 200 00:08:56,480 --> 00:08:59,480 Speaker 2: do you turn off that static, that noise when it 201 00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:02,760 Speaker 2: starts to creep in? Is there some sort of mechanism 202 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:07,280 Speaker 2: you can use to, I guess, get yourself off that mindset? 203 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 5: Well, you know, in the beginning, when you first, you know, 204 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:12,079 Speaker 5: take that time, You're gonna have all kind of thoughts, 205 00:09:12,080 --> 00:09:14,800 Speaker 5: probably some weird ones like mcribs flying by and other 206 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:18,400 Speaker 5: things like that. But when you do it, you start 207 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:20,240 Speaker 5: to get used to it. You also realize that you 208 00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:23,080 Speaker 5: can decide to sort of go with certain thoughts or 209 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 5: say nope, not going that path. 210 00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:26,600 Speaker 4: And I do that sometimes. I wake up. 211 00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:29,400 Speaker 5: I try to be very positive and grateful for everything 212 00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:31,520 Speaker 5: in my life. When I first get out of bed 213 00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,680 Speaker 5: on my phone is nowhere near my bed. I wake 214 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:37,200 Speaker 5: up before I even get out. I open my eyes 215 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,720 Speaker 5: and I lay there and I think about these things 216 00:09:39,720 --> 00:09:42,400 Speaker 5: that I'm thankful for. Grateful for And sometimes I start 217 00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 5: thinking about business, I start thinking about some of my 218 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:48,400 Speaker 5: clients or the market or whatever, and I. 219 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,959 Speaker 4: Just kind of said, nope, nope, keep going, like I'm 220 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:52,800 Speaker 4: not going to grab on to you and ride you out. 221 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 5: So it's grabbing on to certain thoughts and going for 222 00:09:55,559 --> 00:09:57,880 Speaker 5: a ride or just deciding no, I'm not going to 223 00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,640 Speaker 5: take that one. It's kind of like deciding when your 224 00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:02,679 Speaker 5: body's or surfing is you're going to ride awave or not. 225 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:04,280 Speaker 5: Ye know, I'm gonna let that one go. And that's 226 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,120 Speaker 5: what you want to do with these thoughts. Let some 227 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:07,800 Speaker 5: go rite others. 228 00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:13,800 Speaker 2: I also find this, and this is going to sound weird, 229 00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:16,719 Speaker 2: but in my own life is I pull examples of 230 00:10:16,920 --> 00:10:21,960 Speaker 2: me as a way to understand the nature of just 231 00:10:22,040 --> 00:10:24,840 Speaker 2: how things work. And feel free to tell me if 232 00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:27,120 Speaker 2: I'm just a weird guy and no one else is 233 00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:30,360 Speaker 2: like this. But I found that laziness is a powerful 234 00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:33,400 Speaker 2: tool to turn off negative things in your life. Meaning 235 00:10:33,760 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 2: you may have bad ideas and you know they're bad ideas. 236 00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:39,400 Speaker 2: They may be impulses to do the wrong thing, knowing 237 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:42,880 Speaker 2: that it is wrong, but whatever something inside you says, 238 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:43,800 Speaker 2: just go do it anyway. 239 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:47,880 Speaker 6: Who cares. But I found that if you lean on laziness. 240 00:10:47,440 --> 00:10:49,960 Speaker 2: To say I just I don't feel like doing it, 241 00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:53,200 Speaker 2: it makes those thoughts go away. And it's probably the 242 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:56,080 Speaker 2: wrong way to look at it. But I think laziness 243 00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,920 Speaker 2: could be used as a tool in some ways. 244 00:10:59,360 --> 00:11:01,679 Speaker 5: Ryan, and might be able to but I cannot come 245 00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:03,200 Speaker 5: up with any for you. I'm sorry. 246 00:11:05,520 --> 00:11:07,360 Speaker 6: Go ahead and tell me that it's a bad idea. 247 00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,680 Speaker 2: I mean, you want to be able to defeat certain 248 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:13,240 Speaker 2: things that pop in there, especially as you live your 249 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:16,000 Speaker 2: life and you're trying to make it better yourself in life. 250 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:21,280 Speaker 2: So let's talk about the pizza fight again. Did that 251 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:24,480 Speaker 2: when you go back and reflect on those things. I'm sorry, 252 00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,800 Speaker 2: but I'm sure a lot of people listening here they 253 00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:28,880 Speaker 2: have those moments when they were kids they reflect back 254 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:31,240 Speaker 2: on these things, or maybe they just kind of, you know, 255 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:34,240 Speaker 2: bury it down and they haven't thought about it. For you, 256 00:11:34,320 --> 00:11:36,760 Speaker 2: it was something that was reintroduced and you gave it 257 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 2: a second thought. So can you use moments like that, 258 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,680 Speaker 2: and maybe you know people listening here moments like that 259 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:47,240 Speaker 2: and just say to yourself, all right, I can make 260 00:11:47,280 --> 00:11:49,840 Speaker 2: something of this and look at where I've come from. 261 00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:52,920 Speaker 2: Maybe if we were to take this as one pinpoint 262 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:54,959 Speaker 2: in my life and look at it where I'm in today. 263 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,360 Speaker 2: It shows that if we were to pinpoint this very moment, 264 00:11:57,679 --> 00:11:59,400 Speaker 2: I'm going to be pretty far away from this in 265 00:11:59,440 --> 00:11:59,840 Speaker 2: the future. 266 00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:03,400 Speaker 5: The goal, yeah, I mean, if you picture anything that 267 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:07,040 Speaker 5: you've done or doing, imagine a mirror being held up 268 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 5: to you. Or maybe even better yet, is if someone 269 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,200 Speaker 5: videotaped it. Because we were I don't know how old 270 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:14,719 Speaker 5: you are, Ryan, but I'm forty six. When I was 271 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:17,800 Speaker 5: growing up, they didn't have cell phones and cameras everywhere, 272 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:20,480 Speaker 5: and it was a great time to be alive because 273 00:12:20,520 --> 00:12:22,640 Speaker 5: you'dn't have to worry about people, you know, making a 274 00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 5: video of you in a in a frustrated state, a 275 00:12:25,360 --> 00:12:28,080 Speaker 5: drunken state, in college or wherever you might have been. 276 00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:31,800 Speaker 5: And so most things were just not there except for 277 00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:34,320 Speaker 5: the people that were in that moment. But if you 278 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,000 Speaker 5: think about some of the acts of the things that 279 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,720 Speaker 5: you've done, or you're doing or might do, how would 280 00:12:38,720 --> 00:12:40,439 Speaker 5: you view yourself if you were sitting there in your 281 00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:42,680 Speaker 5: house or on your phone watching a video of you. 282 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:46,080 Speaker 5: So if you're in my dad's case watching a video 283 00:12:46,480 --> 00:12:49,679 Speaker 5: of you throwing pizza at this you know this disabled kid? 284 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:51,960 Speaker 4: Essentially, how does that make you feel? Does that make 285 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:54,079 Speaker 4: you want to double down and get a second second pie? 286 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 5: You don't throw that pizza too, or just stop what 287 00:12:57,120 --> 00:13:00,360 Speaker 5: you're doing and be completely ashamed of yourself and never 288 00:13:00,400 --> 00:13:02,720 Speaker 5: do something like that again. And so a big part 289 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:05,000 Speaker 5: of me is when I'm doing things, I think about that, like, 290 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 5: am I being you know, a jerk? How does this look? 291 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:08,720 Speaker 4: Am I? 292 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:09,480 Speaker 1: You know? 293 00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:11,800 Speaker 5: Am I doing something because I think I'm right? Or 294 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 5: is it actually right? And just how would this be 295 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,160 Speaker 5: viewed by somebody else? Because we have our perception of 296 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:19,320 Speaker 5: what we think makes sense, and it's not always right. 297 00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:22,920 Speaker 5: So when you empathize, which is a powerful another basic tool, 298 00:13:23,760 --> 00:13:25,719 Speaker 5: you could really start to see things in your life 299 00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,280 Speaker 5: from a different perspective someone else's and maybe realize, you 300 00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:31,679 Speaker 5: know what, I shouldn't be doing this. So that can 301 00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:34,640 Speaker 5: be certainly helpful. But you know, we talk about our 302 00:13:34,679 --> 00:13:37,280 Speaker 5: minds or such powerful places, but for some people it's 303 00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:39,160 Speaker 5: a wasteland. And if you can get rid of some 304 00:13:39,200 --> 00:13:42,400 Speaker 5: of that junk that cluttered that noise, clear out a bit, 305 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:44,400 Speaker 5: you can start to plant some seeds, and you can 306 00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:47,600 Speaker 5: plant whatever kind of seeds you want hopefully positive seeds, 307 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:50,800 Speaker 5: and when you do, those seeds can then sprout into 308 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:55,719 Speaker 5: very positive harvests which can can result in success, happiness, fulfillment, 309 00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,760 Speaker 5: becoming a more positive person, all. 310 00:13:57,679 --> 00:13:58,439 Speaker 4: This good stuff. 311 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:01,640 Speaker 6: What about fulfillment for someone else? 312 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:03,800 Speaker 2: So let's say you're a parent and you want the 313 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:06,800 Speaker 2: best for your kids, and you know, I know that 314 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:09,760 Speaker 2: you as an individual, you should also look at it 315 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:11,600 Speaker 2: as a personal way. You want to be able to 316 00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:14,200 Speaker 2: develop yourself. You want to be able to better yourself, 317 00:14:14,240 --> 00:14:16,400 Speaker 2: and if you could put yourself in a better position, 318 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:19,840 Speaker 2: you should be able to then in turn help the 319 00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:22,280 Speaker 2: position of your kids. But let's look at it as 320 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:24,640 Speaker 2: maybe your purpose is to help your kids. Can you 321 00:14:24,640 --> 00:14:27,040 Speaker 2: look at it in that standpoint, as in, I'm going 322 00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:29,760 Speaker 2: to better myself so I can use this in a 323 00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:31,040 Speaker 2: way to better them. 324 00:14:31,680 --> 00:14:35,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, I think you can provide frameworks. And the whole 325 00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:39,240 Speaker 5: underlying framework framework of my book is the three p's 326 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:42,000 Speaker 5: or are the three p's, And it's in the subtitle 327 00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:44,120 Speaker 5: how to experience the Power of Living on by discovering 328 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 5: your potential, passion and purpose. 329 00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:51,600 Speaker 4: And if you want to help a kid, or your kid, or. 330 00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:55,800 Speaker 5: Yourself, you have to try to fulfill your potential, whatever 331 00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:59,360 Speaker 5: that is, right, whatever your sky's the limit is, and 332 00:14:59,400 --> 00:15:02,680 Speaker 5: your passion is the interesting part, and I break the 333 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:06,520 Speaker 5: book down in three parts. The potential is the exciting part, 334 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:08,120 Speaker 5: because like, what is your potential? 335 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,120 Speaker 4: You know, to me, that's just an exciting question. 336 00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,320 Speaker 5: You know who, like someone listening tonight can be someone 337 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:17,080 Speaker 5: of significant importance in this world, maybe a bunch of 338 00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:17,520 Speaker 5: people can. 339 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:19,000 Speaker 4: I just find that exciting. 340 00:15:19,800 --> 00:15:23,280 Speaker 5: Passion is the interesting part because whatever makes you excited 341 00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:26,200 Speaker 5: and gives you an adrenaline rush and you jump out 342 00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:29,520 Speaker 5: of bed, you know, and it could be something ridiculously silly, 343 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,760 Speaker 5: But everyone has passion, and some people don't know what 344 00:15:32,800 --> 00:15:34,560 Speaker 5: that is. So you want to figure out what you're 345 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:37,720 Speaker 5: passionate about, and it's usually there's usually a connection in 346 00:15:37,760 --> 00:15:41,120 Speaker 5: your past. Things you've done, things you've gravitated towards in 347 00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:43,840 Speaker 5: the past when you were a kid, you had more time, 348 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:46,280 Speaker 5: you didn't have the obligations of the real world so much. 349 00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:49,280 Speaker 5: You did things you were passionate about. So it's interesting 350 00:15:49,280 --> 00:15:51,600 Speaker 5: to see what that is. And then the third pay 351 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:57,080 Speaker 5: is purpose, and everybody should have a defined purpose of 352 00:15:57,200 --> 00:16:00,800 Speaker 5: why they're doing everything, and so that's it's the framework. 353 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:03,560 Speaker 5: And so like for my kids, like, I don't I 354 00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:06,720 Speaker 5: don't care what they what their job title is. I 355 00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:08,640 Speaker 5: don't care where they go to college, even though we're 356 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:11,040 Speaker 5: looking at that a lot. For my son, I just 357 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:13,840 Speaker 5: want them to realize that they can fulfill their potential, 358 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:16,840 Speaker 5: reach their potential. And the little secret is once you 359 00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:18,880 Speaker 5: reach that, you realize that there's even more of it 360 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:19,200 Speaker 5: to go. 361 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:20,560 Speaker 4: It's kind of unlimited. 362 00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:25,960 Speaker 1: Listen to more Coast to Coast AM every weeknight at 363 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: one am Eastern, and go to Coast to coastam dot 364 00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,080 Speaker 1: com for more