WEBVTT - Governor Gretchen Whitmer 0:00:04.440 --> 0:00:07.520 Do you think that we as people are able to 0:00:07.680 --> 0:00:08.879 love unconditionally? 0:00:09.600 --> 0:00:11.680 You know, my husband and I have that debate. Who 0:00:11.880 --> 0:00:15.560 always tells me I'm his soulmate. He's a romantic and 0:00:15.680 --> 0:00:17.720 I am less of a romantic. 0:00:18.280 --> 0:00:21.079 I learn a lot from my dog and from my child, 0:00:21.239 --> 0:00:24.959 yes I mean, and from my boyfriend too, who he 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:28.000 does seem to love me unconditionally. I seem to have 0:00:28.040 --> 0:00:29.200 a lot more conditions. 0:00:30.040 --> 0:00:32.440 Maybe maybe it's a female thing too. 0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:34.160 Maybe it is a female thing. 0:00:36.200 --> 0:00:41.120 Hello, I'm mini driver. I've always loved Proust's questionnaire. It 0:00:41.240 --> 0:00:45.480 was originally in nineteenth century parlor game where players would 0:00:45.479 --> 0:00:48.800 ask each other thirty five questions aimed at revealing the 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:50.120 other player's true nature. 0:00:50.840 --> 0:00:52.080 In asking different. 0:00:51.840 --> 0:00:54.880 People the same set of questions, you can make observations 0:00:54.960 --> 0:00:57.880 about which truths appear to be universal. And it made 0:00:57.880 --> 0:01:00.880 me wonder, what if these questions were just the jumping 0:01:00.920 --> 0:01:04.000 off point, what greater depths would be revealed if I 0:01:04.080 --> 0:01:08.399 asked these questions as conversation starters. So I adapted Pru's 0:01:08.440 --> 0:01:11.080 questionnaire and I wrote my own seven questions that I 0:01:11.160 --> 0:01:14.280 personally think are pertinent to a person's story. They are 0:01:14.840 --> 0:01:17.640 when and where were you happiest. What is the quality 0:01:17.680 --> 0:01:22.600 you like least about yourself? What relationship, real or fictionalized, defines. 0:01:22.280 --> 0:01:22.720 Love for you? 0:01:23.240 --> 0:01:26.880 What question would you most like answered, What person, place, 0:01:27.040 --> 0:01:29.880 or experience has shaped you the most? What would be 0:01:29.920 --> 0:01:32.520 your last meal? And can you tell me something in 0:01:32.560 --> 0:01:36.200 your life that's grown out of a personal disaster? And 0:01:36.280 --> 0:01:40.720 I've gathered a group of really remarkable people, ones that 0:01:40.800 --> 0:01:43.280 I am honored and humbled to have had the chance 0:01:43.319 --> 0:01:45.960 to engage with. You may not hear their answers to 0:01:46.000 --> 0:01:49.360 all seven of these questions. We've whittled it down to 0:01:49.560 --> 0:01:53.720 which questions felt closest to their experience, or the most surprising, 0:01:54.160 --> 0:01:59.680 or created the most fertile ground to connect. My guest 0:01:59.680 --> 0:02:03.000 today is is Governor of the State of Michigan, Gretchen Whitmer. 0:02:03.680 --> 0:02:08.440 Governor Whitmer is an open, articulate, fantastically strong public servant. 0:02:08.840 --> 0:02:11.200 I like that term better than politician because there's an 0:02:11.240 --> 0:02:14.680 honesty and lack of hubrius present in it, qualities that 0:02:15.000 --> 0:02:18.600 I think Governor Whitmer also exemplifies. I was really excited 0:02:18.600 --> 0:02:21.440 to have her on my show for lots of reasons, 0:02:21.480 --> 0:02:24.239 but like you, the main one being so I could 0:02:24.280 --> 0:02:28.280 ask is it going to be okay, to which she replied, yes, 0:02:28.880 --> 0:02:34.000 so few. She said, in politics and in moments like this, 0:02:34.639 --> 0:02:38.480 we just have to remain resilient and forward facing. There 0:02:38.520 --> 0:02:43.480 is a deeply sensible and reliable aura that I felt 0:02:43.560 --> 0:02:47.280 from Governor Whitmer. She speaks with the same resolve about 0:02:47.520 --> 0:02:50.920 feeling positive about the future as she does sharing incredibly 0:02:50.960 --> 0:02:54.359 painful memories from her life, her attempt at kidnapping and 0:02:54.440 --> 0:02:57.880 the sexual assault she experienced while in college. All of 0:02:57.880 --> 0:03:01.120 these things have created a resilient and a voice that 0:03:01.320 --> 0:03:05.639 is inspiring, and I, for one, am incredibly glad that 0:03:05.760 --> 0:03:10.840 voice exists in the American political arena today. Governor Whitman's book, 0:03:11.240 --> 0:03:15.160 True Gritch What I've Learned about Life, leadership, and everything 0:03:15.160 --> 0:03:16.839 in between, came out last year. 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:23.320 Would you tell me where and when you were happiest? 0:03:25.080 --> 0:03:28.560 I love the question because I reflected, you know, on 0:03:28.880 --> 0:03:31.799 various points in my life. When I think, one of 0:03:31.840 --> 0:03:34.080 the hardest times in my life was when I was 0:03:34.120 --> 0:03:37.000 pregnant with my first daughter, but also taking care of 0:03:37.040 --> 0:03:39.720 my mom at the end of her life, and my 0:03:39.800 --> 0:03:42.240 mom was dying of brain cancer. She was only fifty 0:03:42.320 --> 0:03:45.840 nine at the time, and I was pregnant and brought 0:03:45.880 --> 0:03:48.680 this new little girl into the world, who I named 0:03:48.680 --> 0:03:52.240 after my mom. And I remember having some really peaceful, 0:03:52.360 --> 0:03:56.280 happy moments despite it being so tough losing my mom 0:03:56.360 --> 0:03:59.440 and the sadness that came with that, but being able 0:03:59.480 --> 0:04:03.160 to focus on the future in really. 0:04:02.920 --> 0:04:04.000 Hard time trimes. 0:04:04.080 --> 0:04:07.360 I felt really at peace and very happy during those 0:04:07.400 --> 0:04:10.640 early years of my daughter's life. 0:04:10.880 --> 0:04:15.200 Oh my gosh, and your mom met your baby daughter, 0:04:15.920 --> 0:04:16.320 she did? 0:04:16.400 --> 0:04:19.680 You know, you always hear those stories about people that 0:04:20.200 --> 0:04:23.200 defy odds or live longer because they have something to 0:04:23.200 --> 0:04:25.880 look forward to. And I was always a little skeptical, 0:04:26.000 --> 0:04:29.560 but I saw it in my mom. She was given 0:04:29.960 --> 0:04:33.080 four to six months to live and lived for over 0:04:33.120 --> 0:04:37.320 eighteen months and saw the birth of her first grandchild, 0:04:37.360 --> 0:04:40.960 who became her namesake. And I think it was good healthcare, 0:04:41.080 --> 0:04:44.400 was good attitude, supportive family, but also something to look 0:04:44.440 --> 0:04:44.919 forward to. 0:04:45.680 --> 0:04:50.160 It's incredible, actually our intention, Like look at that, intending 0:04:50.360 --> 0:04:54.240 to prolong our life because we want to do something, 0:04:54.520 --> 0:04:57.600 we forget to believe. We forget to believe in the 0:04:57.600 --> 0:05:01.880 power of our intention and the idea of setting our course. 0:05:02.040 --> 0:05:04.120 Like I love that your mum set the coordinates. What 0:05:04.400 --> 0:05:09.400 I am going to meet my granddaughter, and I love 0:05:09.440 --> 0:05:11.880 the idea that death was no match for that, for 0:05:12.000 --> 0:05:13.159 that intention. 0:05:13.360 --> 0:05:16.640 That real estate between your two ears, my father always says, 0:05:16.839 --> 0:05:21.680 is the most valuable right, because what you think, your 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:25.719 intention that drives so much of what your reality. 0:05:25.320 --> 0:05:26.719 Is, it really does. 0:05:26.760 --> 0:05:29.680 But you, I think so often we get swayed by 0:05:30.320 --> 0:05:33.120 we get swayed by what is circumstantial. So we get 0:05:33.160 --> 0:05:37.520 swayed by the day we wake up it's raining, the 0:05:37.560 --> 0:05:40.960 gas has been turned off, and we've broken up with 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:46.240 our partner, and we align ourselves with the awfulness of 0:05:46.320 --> 0:05:50.040 that as opposed to the thing that solves for all 0:05:50.080 --> 0:05:52.479 of that, which is what is inside. I wish they 0:05:52.600 --> 0:05:55.760 taught it in school. I wish that the idea of 0:05:55.839 --> 0:06:00.400 intention setting and aligning yourself with the best possible outcome 0:06:00.480 --> 0:06:03.920 even when things look really dire. I talk about it 0:06:03.960 --> 0:06:07.920 a lot with my son, actually, particularly in these days 0:06:08.040 --> 0:06:12.360 where it really feels like the sky is falling in 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:15.960 in a lot of ways in our world. The best 0:06:15.960 --> 0:06:18.520 thing I found to say to him is to keep 0:06:18.680 --> 0:06:22.400 looking for the good and to keep aligning with that, 0:06:22.960 --> 0:06:27.440 and to not give the airtime or the energy to 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:31.960 all of that roiling horror that's going to roil and 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:34.560 horror and do its thing. But what we have to 0:06:34.600 --> 0:06:37.599 do is to stay for the focused. And it's really difficult. 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:41.440 It's a discipline. It feels like a profound spiritual practice. 0:06:41.720 --> 0:06:42.600 It is a practice. 0:06:42.640 --> 0:06:44.599 And I think, you know, one of the things that 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:49.120 I've come to realize and really appreciate is we all 0:06:49.200 --> 0:06:49.880 have control. 0:06:49.920 --> 0:06:52.480 It feels like so much is out of our control 0:06:52.760 --> 0:06:53.200 and so. 0:06:53.160 --> 0:06:55.719 Much is but we all have control about what we 0:06:55.839 --> 0:06:58.680 take in from the world, in what we put out 0:06:58.720 --> 0:07:01.960 into the world. And I'm always my girls, And even 0:07:02.000 --> 0:07:04.720 on the hardest days, I sit down and I rate 0:07:04.839 --> 0:07:07.279 three good things that happened, or three things for which 0:07:07.279 --> 0:07:11.800 I'm grateful. And so some days it's my dogs and 0:07:12.080 --> 0:07:15.320 a glass of wine and the Great British Baking Show. 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:18.880 But I find something for which I'm grateful. 0:07:19.400 --> 0:07:20.320 I have the same three. 0:07:20.400 --> 0:07:22.239 I have the same three, the same tree list. 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:23.960 That's a good list right there. 0:07:24.280 --> 0:07:28.160 And what would you counter with, you know, in those 0:07:28.200 --> 0:07:32.080 moments where it feels because let's face it, it can 0:07:32.120 --> 0:07:36.040 feel tidal when things that are outside of our control, 0:07:36.120 --> 0:07:38.840 whether it's politics or what we see going on globally 0:07:39.280 --> 0:07:42.280 or whatever is going on personally, in our lives when 0:07:42.320 --> 0:07:45.360 it feels tidal. Do you really feel that sitting down 0:07:45.400 --> 0:07:50.080 and counting your making a gratitude list in that moment, 0:07:50.360 --> 0:07:54.520 is that really can stave off the tide of fear 0:07:54.640 --> 0:07:55.560 or negative thinking. 0:07:56.360 --> 0:07:56.760 I do. 0:07:57.040 --> 0:08:00.520 I really believe that that practice has helped me navigate 0:08:00.600 --> 0:08:04.280 some of the hardest, most unimaginable things I could have 0:08:04.400 --> 0:08:08.360 ever fathomed. I'm an ordinary person, but I serve in 0:08:08.400 --> 0:08:13.080 a really extraordinary rule, and it's an extraordinary time in 0:08:13.080 --> 0:08:16.040 which to serve. And even at the end of the day, 0:08:16.360 --> 0:08:19.680 sitting down and feeling overwhelmed and we all feel that 0:08:19.960 --> 0:08:24.200 on occasion, but centering back to three things for which 0:08:24.200 --> 0:08:27.720 I'm grateful will help me look at the next ten 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.880 yards instead of getting overwhelmed by the next one hundred, 0:08:31.600 --> 0:08:35.320 and helps me manage I'm sure. 0:08:35.400 --> 0:08:38.320 I mean, oh my gosh, If you're doing that from 0:08:38.360 --> 0:08:42.040 the point of governance, that makes ess Actually, I find 0:08:42.040 --> 0:08:46.319 that incredibly positive because you're a human being tasked. 0:08:46.000 --> 0:08:49.559 With a big job. But I like the. 0:08:49.520 --> 0:08:53.080 Idea that you can keep things grossroots in a way 0:08:53.640 --> 0:08:55.040 to manage those big things. 0:08:55.520 --> 0:08:56.559 That's really useful. 0:09:01.440 --> 0:09:05.520 What question would you most like answered? 0:09:06.840 --> 0:09:11.040 Well, I think you know at fifty three years old 0:09:11.440 --> 0:09:14.920 and with my mother who died at fifty nine. I 0:09:14.960 --> 0:09:19.240 do think what happens after this life, That's a question 0:09:19.280 --> 0:09:21.040 I would love to know the answer to, and I 0:09:21.080 --> 0:09:23.720 never will and I would you have to be at 0:09:23.720 --> 0:09:26.960 peace with that, because there's I will never know for 0:09:27.120 --> 0:09:30.200 sure until it happens. But I think that's one that 0:09:30.559 --> 0:09:32.560 is always kind of in the background of my head. 0:09:32.760 --> 0:09:34.960 How do I appreciate. 0:09:34.679 --> 0:09:37.480 The moment I'm in now and stay in the moment 0:09:38.040 --> 0:09:41.120 and recognize I won't ever get the answer to that question. 0:09:42.280 --> 0:09:44.920 I mean, I think that's I think what's interesting is 0:09:44.920 --> 0:09:48.360 there's an answer in what you just said that. 0:09:48.640 --> 0:09:51.199 I wonder if we knew, would. 0:09:50.920 --> 0:09:54.480 We allow ourselves to be as present in this life, 0:09:54.520 --> 0:09:57.240 if we were so busy focused on or going, oh, 0:09:57.240 --> 0:09:59.679 it doesn't matter what I do now, because I'm going 0:09:59.720 --> 0:10:02.400 to my immortality and all these. 0:10:02.240 --> 0:10:03.480 Good things are going to happen there. 0:10:04.120 --> 0:10:07.480 I wonder if that's maybe that's part of it, that 0:10:07.559 --> 0:10:11.720 we wouldn't be as present if we were so certain. 0:10:13.400 --> 0:10:16.480 One of the quotes, I think it is Carl Sagan 0:10:16.640 --> 0:10:19.200 but said we all began to stardust, and we will 0:10:19.240 --> 0:10:22.640 all go back to stardust. One day something to that effect, 0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:28.400 and we're all connected and we existed in some form always, 0:10:28.840 --> 0:10:31.800 and that gives me some peace. But I'm searching. I'm 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:32.319 a searcher. 0:10:33.280 --> 0:10:36.319 Yeah, I mean me too. I guess it's knowing. It 0:10:36.360 --> 0:10:41.240 wouldn't look it probably doesn't look like this. Like when 0:10:41.280 --> 0:10:43.960 I think about my mum or my dad, both of 0:10:44.000 --> 0:10:48.360 who've died, I can feel them so specifically, but I 0:10:48.400 --> 0:10:49.160 can't see them. 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:51.920 Obviously, I can't hug them, but. 0:10:51.920 --> 0:10:54.160 I feel them in the same in that same way. 0:10:54.200 --> 0:10:57.040 That's not a memory of love. It feels way more 0:10:57.080 --> 0:11:01.520 present than that. So I quite like the mystery. I 0:11:01.600 --> 0:11:05.679 quite like the mystery because mystery and gender's faith, and 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:09.240 perhaps that's the most that we can have as humans, 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:12.960 because we just have no idea why we are here, 0:11:13.200 --> 0:11:16.840 what the meaning is. Love seems to be the biggest 0:11:16.840 --> 0:11:19.719 one I could ever point to. Yeah, but I like 0:11:19.800 --> 0:11:23.520 that Carl Sagan quote, You're right, we're dust. 0:11:23.520 --> 0:11:24.080 It's so funny. 0:11:24.120 --> 0:11:28.160 It can sound pejorative, you're dust, and then it can 0:11:28.200 --> 0:11:31.720 also sound incredibly positive, your stardust star dust. 0:11:31.880 --> 0:11:32.320 I like that. 0:11:44.280 --> 0:11:48.320 Can you tell me something in your life that has 0:11:48.440 --> 0:11:50.400 grown out of a personal disaster? 0:11:52.120 --> 0:11:55.640 I wrote a book recently, and you know, part of 0:11:55.679 --> 0:11:58.679 the reason I wrote it is people would often ask, 0:11:59.440 --> 0:12:02.560 with all the threats I've gotten and all of the 0:12:02.640 --> 0:12:05.079 crises I've had to lead through, why do I want 0:12:05.120 --> 0:12:07.640 to keep doing this? Why do I still feel optimistic? 0:12:07.679 --> 0:12:10.480 And I thought, I'm going to give people reasons why 0:12:10.520 --> 0:12:13.320 they should feel optimistic and things that I've learned in 0:12:13.320 --> 0:12:14.720 my life that have helped. 0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:15.560 Me navigate this. 0:12:16.400 --> 0:12:20.080 And one of the things that people responded most kind 0:12:20.120 --> 0:12:23.240 of strongly too, was in the book I talk about 0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:27.240 listening and the power of listening and why more people 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:31.240 need to cultivate that strength. I think it's a superpower. 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:35.360 I'd like to understand from the men who were involved 0:12:35.360 --> 0:12:38.880 in a plot to kidnap and kill me, I would 0:12:38.960 --> 0:12:42.200 like to understand why. I would actually like to meet 0:12:42.840 --> 0:12:46.520 with one of them and ask them why and understand 0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:49.560 what was going on in their lives. And people have 0:12:49.640 --> 0:12:52.400 thought that's kind of a strange thing to say, I 0:12:52.440 --> 0:12:55.959 get it, but maybe there's something to learn that will 0:12:56.000 --> 0:12:59.840 help me be a better governor or a better human being. 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:02.560 Because it was unusual in a country of three hundred 0:13:02.600 --> 0:13:06.600 and thirty million people that about a dozen chose to 0:13:06.720 --> 0:13:09.360 put together a plot to kidnap and kill a sitting governor. 0:13:10.040 --> 0:13:13.360 So what was happening there and what was going on 0:13:13.440 --> 0:13:16.160 in their lives that maybe there's some good that can 0:13:16.160 --> 0:13:16.720 come from us. 0:13:17.280 --> 0:13:18.319 I haven't done it yet. 0:13:18.440 --> 0:13:21.320 I'd like to do, but there's still all sorts of appeals, 0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:23.400 so I can't do it yet, But one day i'd 0:13:23.440 --> 0:13:25.520 like to. I'd like to see if I can understand 0:13:25.559 --> 0:13:26.600 something or learn something. 0:13:27.520 --> 0:13:31.280 I think that is an astonishing way to approach what 0:13:31.440 --> 0:13:35.160 is unfathomable for all of us. I think that will 0:13:35.200 --> 0:13:37.240 be an amazing book, and I really hope that you 0:13:37.280 --> 0:13:41.200 write it and examine those ideas. But God, I'm so 0:13:41.320 --> 0:13:44.120 sorry that happened to you. It's a poetry thing, but 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:48.960 I am assuming that you will turn it into something 0:13:48.960 --> 0:13:50.960 else down the line. Yeah. 0:13:51.120 --> 0:13:51.640 Yeah. 0:13:51.800 --> 0:13:55.080 A therapist once said to me, we're all a ball 0:13:55.120 --> 0:13:58.600 of clay, and sometimes things are taken away from us. 0:13:58.920 --> 0:14:02.120 It's not our fault. Something's taken away. And when a 0:14:02.120 --> 0:14:04.200 ball of clay is hollowed out, it becomes a cup, 0:14:04.440 --> 0:14:07.680 a vessel, and it has purpose. And so I think 0:14:07.720 --> 0:14:11.760 that's maybe a piece of wisdom that someone gave to 0:14:11.800 --> 0:14:15.760 me that has helped me find value even in really tough, 0:14:15.880 --> 0:14:17.240 unfair stuff that happens. 0:14:17.760 --> 0:14:20.960 That's such a good way of putting it personally in like, 0:14:21.360 --> 0:14:27.040 for you, how do you know when something that has 0:14:27.120 --> 0:14:31.560 been lost or removed or is painful. 0:14:31.200 --> 0:14:33.400 Is something that needs to be let go of? And 0:14:33.440 --> 0:14:34.400 how do you know when it. 0:14:34.360 --> 0:14:37.880 Is something that can be turned into something else? 0:14:39.560 --> 0:14:45.080 I don't know, dang it, I really did think. 0:14:45.480 --> 0:14:47.480 I think it reveals itself, you know, Minnie. 0:14:47.560 --> 0:14:50.360 I often think about as I'm a survivor of sexual 0:14:50.400 --> 0:14:53.840 assault when I was in college and I had not. 0:14:53.960 --> 0:14:57.360 Talked about it publicly for decades. I'd shared it with 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:58.760 a few partners over the. 0:14:58.760 --> 0:15:02.600 Years, but I had never spoken about it publicly. And 0:15:02.640 --> 0:15:05.760 we were having a very difficult debate in the Michigan 0:15:05.840 --> 0:15:08.240 legislature and I had revealed that I'd been raped in 0:15:08.280 --> 0:15:12.200 college during the debate. I had not planned to do it, 0:15:12.440 --> 0:15:15.120 And in the aftermath of it, I needed to call 0:15:15.160 --> 0:15:17.480 my dad on the way home from work because I 0:15:17.560 --> 0:15:19.240 knew it would be in the news and I wanted 0:15:19.320 --> 0:15:21.240 him to hear from me instead of on the news. 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:25.480 And anyway, I carried that with me in silence for 0:15:25.600 --> 0:15:29.120 twenty years, and then I spoke about it, and then 0:15:29.720 --> 0:15:33.520 I got more comfortable speaking about it and realize that 0:15:33.600 --> 0:15:37.080 it's given me purpose. And now as a champion for 0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:42.080 women's reproductive rights, I can see that my experience, even 0:15:42.080 --> 0:15:46.400 though it was hideous and I would never want anyone 0:15:46.400 --> 0:15:49.120 else to go through it, I have found my voice 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:51.640 in it and it's given me purpose. And that's maybe 0:15:51.680 --> 0:15:56.320 the most visceral example. But I didn't know that it 0:15:56.360 --> 0:15:59.720 had any purpose until twenty years after the event when 0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:02.360 I shared it, And now it's become a part of 0:16:02.360 --> 0:16:06.960 my how I try to persuade people about supporting reproductive rates. 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:13.360 I think that's extraordinary, and that is quite literally the 0:16:13.960 --> 0:16:20.720 I'm assuming earning something terrible into something good. But also 0:16:22.000 --> 0:16:26.240 I think those things take time to marinate. They take 0:16:26.360 --> 0:16:29.200 time for us to be able to articulate in a 0:16:29.240 --> 0:16:34.680 way that will be heard. Because particularly around this, but 0:16:34.800 --> 0:16:37.720 particularly we look at women who have not been believed 0:16:37.720 --> 0:16:41.960 for so long, around sexual assault of rape kits sitting 0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:46.280 in police stations, unused, and women not being believed. It 0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:49.640 feels very much that in a way, we were waiting 0:16:49.880 --> 0:16:53.000 for women to come to a place where they could 0:16:53.160 --> 0:16:56.760 articulate this agony in a way that was going to 0:16:56.800 --> 0:16:59.920 be that was going to reach ears like I want 0:17:00.160 --> 0:17:02.800 of twenty years ago, if anyone would have heard you 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:05.800 when you talked about it in the way that you 0:17:05.800 --> 0:17:10.119 can speak about it now, which from I've heard you 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:13.199 speak on it a little in the past. It is 0:17:13.280 --> 0:17:17.640 so clear, it is so without self pity, even though 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:20.720 you would have every right to feel that way. And 0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:25.159 more than that, it is galvanizing, and that to me, 0:17:25.640 --> 0:17:28.959 that galvanizing means change is possible, and also that anyone 0:17:28.960 --> 0:17:31.720 listening whould also suffered from that will feel stronger because 0:17:31.760 --> 0:17:36.199 of it. So I wonder again, like the divine timing 0:17:36.240 --> 0:17:38.560 of the time when we are able to speak about 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:44.040 terrible things again, it's a superpower. It's a superpower to 0:17:44.040 --> 0:17:46.480 be able to turn that stuff into something else. Gosh, 0:17:46.480 --> 0:17:48.240 the more I say this, I really do hope that 0:17:48.320 --> 0:17:53.320 you write your book because I think a lot of 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.440 people for whom who feel powerless in their lives over 0:17:56.480 --> 0:18:00.600 either situations or their emotions, would really benefit. 0:18:01.720 --> 0:18:02.119 Thank you. 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:11.080 So, can you tell me what person, place, or experience 0:18:11.480 --> 0:18:13.600 most altered your life. 0:18:14.240 --> 0:18:18.000 I think the time that I was taking care of 0:18:18.000 --> 0:18:19.720 my mom at the end of her life and my 0:18:19.840 --> 0:18:22.760 daughter at the beginning of hers. You know, they say 0:18:22.840 --> 0:18:27.600 that the five most stressful events that ever happen in 0:18:27.600 --> 0:18:31.560 a course of a lifetime are moving your home, starting 0:18:31.600 --> 0:18:33.840 a new job, the birth of a loved one, the 0:18:33.880 --> 0:18:36.280 death of a loved one, and a new marriage. And 0:18:36.359 --> 0:18:39.119 I did all five of those things the span of 0:18:39.200 --> 0:18:42.160 a year and a half when I was newly elected 0:18:42.240 --> 0:18:45.840 state representative in Michigan, caring for my mom at the 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:48.240 end of her life. I just had my daughter after 0:18:48.320 --> 0:18:51.119 getting married, and for whatever reason, I decided that was 0:18:51.119 --> 0:18:52.520 a good time to move my home. 0:18:52.359 --> 0:18:53.840 Too, which was crazy. 0:18:53.880 --> 0:18:57.719 But it was that period of time that was, without 0:18:57.920 --> 0:19:01.800 question that the heaviest and hardest, but also really made 0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:07.200 me who I am today. I don't have patience for bs. 0:19:07.280 --> 0:19:11.840 I want to get things done, and I had to 0:19:11.840 --> 0:19:14.399 find an insurance company at that time and figure out 0:19:14.400 --> 0:19:17.240 how to keep nursing my daughter and prepare for work, 0:19:17.320 --> 0:19:20.359 and it was a really difficult time in my life, 0:19:20.440 --> 0:19:24.960 but it forged who I am today. And so without question, 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:28.679 that's what I would point to is having given me 0:19:28.760 --> 0:19:31.560 the skills to navigate a pandemic and get a state 0:19:31.600 --> 0:19:35.360 of ten million people through some of the most incredible challenges. 0:19:36.040 --> 0:19:37.359 It was that period of time for me. 0:19:38.000 --> 0:19:42.720 Wow, Wow. I mean, I don't know how you did it. 0:19:42.800 --> 0:19:45.440 Truly, I don't know how you did one of those things, 0:19:45.440 --> 0:19:48.000 because I've been through a few of them, and britt 0:19:48.000 --> 0:19:52.480 to have been simultaneous is extraordinary. Did you find that, 0:19:52.680 --> 0:19:57.159 I think women often become a centrifuge in certainly like 0:19:57.200 --> 0:20:01.040 within a family and when things are happening incredibly focused 0:20:01.080 --> 0:20:06.440 and organized. Did you find that people showed up to 0:20:07.280 --> 0:20:10.520 really help that once you knew what it was you. 0:20:10.440 --> 0:20:10.840 Had to do. 0:20:10.920 --> 0:20:12.960 You had to be there for your mother, you had 0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:14.560 to be there for your baby daughter, you had to 0:20:14.600 --> 0:20:18.040 move your home, and you had to govern ten million people. 0:20:18.720 --> 0:20:22.159 Did you find that people came into your sphere to 0:20:22.280 --> 0:20:23.520 really support and help you. 0:20:24.320 --> 0:20:26.440 Absolutely? I am really fortunate. 0:20:26.520 --> 0:20:32.160 I've got wonderful friends and extended family and a team 0:20:32.359 --> 0:20:35.800 around me that I couldn't have done any of it 0:20:35.880 --> 0:20:39.200 without a lot of people having chipped in and been 0:20:39.240 --> 0:20:39.880 a part of it. 0:20:40.400 --> 0:20:41.440 And it's interesting too. 0:20:41.520 --> 0:20:45.960 I think it reaffirms why it's so important that we 0:20:46.119 --> 0:20:48.040 have diverse groups of. 0:20:48.040 --> 0:20:51.080 People in decision making places. 0:20:51.800 --> 0:20:54.879 A lot of my male counterparts, my brother, didn't have 0:20:54.920 --> 0:20:57.280 the same lived experience I did, even though he was 0:20:57.320 --> 0:21:01.560 alive at the same time, and so when there is 0:21:01.640 --> 0:21:05.680 a woman at the table, when there's a debate around 0:21:05.800 --> 0:21:10.879 healthcare or childcare, it's so important because it's not just 0:21:11.600 --> 0:21:14.439 about women, but we have a different experience taking care. 0:21:14.280 --> 0:21:17.040 Of our dads or our brothers or our sons. 0:21:17.800 --> 0:21:21.359 It helps everyone, and I think that, for me is 0:21:21.400 --> 0:21:25.080 one of the most important takeaways from all those hardships, 0:21:25.160 --> 0:21:30.160 is that we need diversity around tables to make better decisions. 0:21:30.280 --> 0:21:35.240 Companies see better bottom lines, governments see better outcomes. And 0:21:35.280 --> 0:21:38.080 that's I think a really important lesson from all of 0:21:38.080 --> 0:21:41.399 that too, that I've always always tried to keep focus on. 0:21:42.480 --> 0:21:45.400 Oh, I couldn't agree with you more. I'm very interested 0:21:45.440 --> 0:21:48.080 Why if you and I can sit here and acknowledge 0:21:48.119 --> 0:21:51.240 that and demonstrably one can see that it is true 0:21:51.880 --> 0:21:55.080 across the board, from corporations and within politics, why is 0:21:55.119 --> 0:21:58.879 it so hard for it to be reflected. Why is 0:21:58.920 --> 0:22:03.040 it so hard to be come not just policy politically, 0:22:03.080 --> 0:22:09.560 but social policy. Why why when it so clearly betters everything. 0:22:09.920 --> 0:22:12.280 Do you think there is a resistance to that kind 0:22:12.320 --> 0:22:13.080 of diversity? 0:22:14.240 --> 0:22:18.720 I mean there have been unscrupulous I think motives for 0:22:18.960 --> 0:22:23.160 people that have tried to suggest that when you have 0:22:23.200 --> 0:22:27.320 that kind of empowerment. It means someone gets left out 0:22:28.400 --> 0:22:32.280 that like if you champion you know, greater diversity here, 0:22:32.320 --> 0:22:35.199 it means it comes at the cost of another, And 0:22:35.240 --> 0:22:36.240 that's not true at all. 0:22:36.680 --> 0:22:38.639 In fact, everyone benefits from it. 0:22:38.800 --> 0:22:40.959 But I do think that there are people with their 0:22:40.960 --> 0:22:44.760 own agendas who try to make the case that some 0:22:44.800 --> 0:22:49.199