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Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of iHeartRadio. Welcome back to

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Speaker 1: the show Ridiculous Historians. Thank you, as always so much

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Speaker 1: for tuning in, and shout out to our resident super

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Speaker 1: producer and regicide expert, the research associate for this episode,

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Speaker 1: mister Max Williams.

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Speaker 2: Indeed, regicide, I love that word. Do you remember the

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Speaker 2: death metal band named di A Side?

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Speaker 1: Yes, to kill a God, to kill a God, all

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Speaker 1: these asides, there's side.

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Speaker 2: And we'll have many as sides of our own in

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Speaker 2: this episode, most likely in terms of tangent.

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Speaker 3: A lot of poop jokes. By the way, I'm Ben

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Speaker 3: or Nol because we.

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Speaker 1: Are a no pun left behind kind of crew, and

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Speaker 1: we want to start, of course, with the requisite disclaimer

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Speaker 1: every single death is a tragedy. However, as time passes

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Speaker 1: on and you get a little distance, you can see

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Speaker 1: the gallows or in this case, the poop humor in

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Speaker 1: some of these unfortunate things, especially when we're talking about

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Speaker 1: medieval era royalty who had a tendency to be corrupted

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Speaker 1: by the power that they wielded.

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Speaker 2: You know, we talk about the Song of Ice and

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Speaker 2: fire books a lot when we do these accounts of royals,

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Speaker 2: and some of their bad behaviors. You may recall spoiler alert,

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Speaker 2: I guess for the series a major character that gets

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Speaker 2: killed by a crossbow while sitting on privy.

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Speaker 3: Yes it is uh.

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Speaker 1: This is a continuation of our ongoing Royal Death series.

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Speaker 1: Checkout parts one and two in your podcast feed of choice.

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Speaker 1: This one, Like you said, Noel, this one has a

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Speaker 1: little bit of a little a little bit more of

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Speaker 1: a focus as well. In this episode, we're exploring the

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Speaker 1: stories of British monarchs and a German born Russian empress

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Speaker 1: who all died in weirdly similar ways depending upon which

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Speaker 1: historical sources you trust, So shout out to shout out

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Speaker 1: to some of our sources. Khalad el Hassan for History Collection,

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Speaker 1: Yoda Suzuki MD, and Abe DeAndre Junior MD for National

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Speaker 1: Library of Medicine, of course, Britannica dot com, more and more.

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Speaker 1: I'm persuaded that they're they're just solid with a lot

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Speaker 1: of their research and spoiler Elizabethmaxim Grunge dot com. Great

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Speaker 1: people of history who died on the toilet.

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Speaker 2: One hundred percent? So why don't we get to it?

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Speaker 2: Or should I say pooet? I shouldn't, but I did

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Speaker 2: takes these bacsies on ridiculous history. George the Second sixteen

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Speaker 2: eighty three born, passed away seventeen sixty. He was the

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Speaker 2: King of Great Britain, the Elector of Hanover, and a

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Speaker 2: Prince elector of the Holy Roman Empire. Of course, until

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Speaker 2: he passed away, he was a constitutional monarch. So this

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Speaker 2: was a little bit different than the like, you know,

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Speaker 2: power bestowed by God, right.

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Speaker 3: Like absolute monarch.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, So there were some other people in the

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Speaker 1: room who could say, I don't know, man, I love

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Speaker 1: to yes, had you because you're the king and you

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Speaker 1: could kill me.

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Speaker 2: But so talk era where Parliament is really starting to

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Speaker 2: kind of take the reins, right.

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Speaker 1: We're yet, we're in an era wherein people are still

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Speaker 1: accepting the notion that royalty and monarchy are divinely inspired

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Speaker 1: and decreed. But the role of some demographic of the

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Speaker 1: people is increasingly prominent. Right, So, the as a constitutional monarch,

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Speaker 1: our buddy, George the Second, to your point, he doesn't

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Speaker 1: have a ton of control over concrete British policy. However,

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Speaker 1: people I don't want to say mascot, but kind of mascot.

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Speaker 1: The people love this feeling of continuation, right of legacy

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Speaker 1: of stability and the British Empire also prospers during George's

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Speaker 1: time as king. He is the last British monarch born

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Speaker 1: outside of Great Britain. He is also the last British

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Speaker 1: monarch to personally lead an army into battle. Queen Elizabeth

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Speaker 1: just never quite got there. That battle took place in

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Speaker 1: seventeen forty three the War of Austrian Secession. George commanded

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Speaker 1: troops in what is known as the Battle of Dettingen

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Speaker 1: against a French army.

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Speaker 3: That's right.

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Speaker 2: And then in seventeen forty five there was a bit

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Speaker 2: of a political scare when an uprising was staged by

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Speaker 2: the Jacobins in order to restore the Stewart dynasty to

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Speaker 2: the throne. But this was an abject failure. So more

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Speaker 2: or less, during George's tenure, things were pretty you know,

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Speaker 2: pretty easy going as far as political regimes go.

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Speaker 1: I mean, especially in comparison to some other to some

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Speaker 1: other historical reigns.

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Speaker 3: Think about George was he wasn't.

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Speaker 1: Everybody's favorite guy because he did not seem to be

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Speaker 1: a man of the people to the public. He had

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Speaker 1: a thick German accent. He was he was not himself

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Speaker 1: a yes ander, he was a no better he was.

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Speaker 1: He was nagging people constantly. He was really he really

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Speaker 1: had a short temper. And he was called boorish often,

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Speaker 1: and borish does not mean boring, no, it means a

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Speaker 1: slovenly kind of lay about, I guess, or just someone

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Speaker 1: that lacks decorum, someone that.

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Speaker 2: Doesn't know how to read the room. And he was

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Speaker 2: not very well liked. You mentioned his accent. He was,

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Speaker 2: in fact ones a small, young gentleman boy, and that's

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Speaker 2: carried along with him throughout his reign, and that accent

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Speaker 2: alone was sort of like a bit of.

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Speaker 3: A red flag to the proper Brits of the day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and still one of the main drivers for what

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Speaker 1: is considered a successful leadership position is how your country

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Speaker 1: is doing while you're in charge. There was a lot

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Speaker 1: of growth in prosperity for Britain. There was a lot

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Speaker 1: of growth and prestige. The British Empire during this time

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Speaker 1: was continuing its expansion to become the empire where the

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Speaker 1: sun never set, with possessions around the globe.

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Speaker 4: And just to throw this note in here, this is

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Speaker 4: the guy that our state of Georgia is named after.

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Speaker 5: It's this King Georgia, I want it. There's three in

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Speaker 5: a row. It's one right here.

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Speaker 2: Okay. Good to know that our state, our fair state,

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Speaker 2: was named after a man who suffered about as undignified

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Speaker 2: a death as one could, much similar to the King

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Speaker 2: of rock and roll, mister Elvis Presley. It's October twenty fifth,

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Speaker 2: seventeen sixty, a morning like any other. As Tom Petty said,

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Speaker 2: it's good to be king. And so our boy George

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Speaker 2: wakes up six am sharp. Good on you for not

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Speaker 2: sleeping in George, and he has a cup.

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Speaker 3: Of hot yummy, my hot coco.

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Speaker 1: He was probably mad about it, knowing George, and uh.

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Speaker 1: And then he went to the royal toilet and he

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Speaker 1: had a difficult conversation with his facilities.

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Speaker 3: He U.

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Speaker 1: The polite way to say it is he overstrained himself

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Speaker 1: and he had an aortic aneurysm. And this happens to

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Speaker 1: people more often than any of us would like to imagine.

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Speaker 2: If anything, I would hope that the legacy of King

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Speaker 2: George the Second. Besides, you know, the fair State of

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Speaker 2: Georgia is a lesson to the people to eat lots

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Speaker 2: of fiber and don't strain the toilet is not a

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Speaker 2: place to read the paper, do your business and then

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Speaker 2: and then go elsewhere. Don't just sit there pushing It's bad.

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Speaker 2: It's bad for the bot. Let it happened to you.

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Speaker 1: And also, uh, just be the be the wave in

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Speaker 1: the ocean. Also shout out to squatty potties, which are

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Speaker 1: apparently way more healthy for you. Anyway, we do know,

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Speaker 1: if you'll recall ridiculous historians in our previous episodes on

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Speaker 1: royal deaths, there are a lot of historical questions, right.

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Speaker 1: There's a lot of vagary in these sources, just because

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Speaker 1: of the amount of time that passed and because honestly,

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Speaker 1: of the importance of the people. So we have to

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Speaker 1: remember that history is kind of history is always written

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Speaker 1: with a slant, so it's it's difficult sometimes to get

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Speaker 1: the truth about embarrassing deaths of powerful people. In this case, though,

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Speaker 1: we do have some solid sources, more so than others,

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Speaker 1: because we do know, because do do we. Because mister

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Speaker 1: Andrews the house surgeon, closest thing they have to a

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Speaker 1: you know, doctor McCoy. He is immediately brought in after

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Speaker 1: George's valet. Here's a crash in the bathroom he sees

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Speaker 1: that the king has fallen from in mac. Really, he

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Speaker 1: has fallen from his throat.

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Speaker 5: I'm quoting the source. I'm quoting the source.

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Speaker 1: Ah, yes, that's that's our that's our buddy, Khalid Elissad.

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Speaker 1: And so the false throwers come out and this surgeon,

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Speaker 1: mister Andrews is brought in and says, I can't revive

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Speaker 1: the king.

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Speaker 3: I better keep taking his blood away.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because that was always going to work, That's definitely.

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Speaker 2: It was certainly the science of the times. But after

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Speaker 2: multiple attempts at blood letting, Uh, it was pretty clear

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Speaker 2: that the king had had passed from this mortal coil.

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Speaker 2: I don't know did did did he ever get the

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Speaker 2: Did the strain result in anything? I don't think he

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Speaker 2: When you die, you kind of you poop yourself. One

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Speaker 2: one would hope that at the very least he you know,

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Speaker 2: he got it out.

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Speaker 3: That's the very end.

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Speaker 1: But there are the modern doctors who have looked back

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Speaker 1: at this case and specific there are primary sources. We

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Speaker 1: know a doctor Nichols performed an autopsy on the King's

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Speaker 1: cadaver and embalmed him as well, meaning we have an

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Speaker 1: autopsy report, and this means that in the modern day

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Speaker 1: medical professionals have been able to examine the case, and

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Speaker 1: they have some differing opinions. You know, with the benefit

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Speaker 1: of modern technology and modern learning, you can poke holes

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Speaker 1: in some of the autopsy.

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Speaker 3: It's right.

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Speaker 2: We have a perspective from some modern physicians. Yoda Suzuki,

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Speaker 2: MD and ab DeAnda Junior, MD wrote in a paper

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Speaker 2: revisiting the death and autopsy of King George the Second

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Speaker 2: for the National Library of Medicine, and they had this

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Speaker 2: to say. First, as noted in the description of the autopsy,

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Speaker 2: the aorda did not rupture the right ventricle ruptured Surgeons

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Speaker 2: have long observed bleeding from the epicardial surface of either

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Speaker 2: ventricle associated with an acute a or to dissection, typically

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Speaker 2: originating from tracking of subadventiteal blood from the aorda onto

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Speaker 2: the surface of the harp, not as the result of

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Speaker 2: a hole in the ventricle. Okay, totally get that. Secondly,

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Speaker 2: going against doctor Nichols hypothesis, going back to quoting the piece,

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Speaker 2: with modern experience with pulmonary hypertension and with real time

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Speaker 2: monitoring with either right heart catheterization or continuous monitoring with

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Speaker 2: a pulmonary artery catheter. We know that systemic pulmonary artery

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Speaker 2: pressure or a pressure surge in the artery will not

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Speaker 2: result in.

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Speaker 3: Rupture or perforation of the right ventricle.

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Speaker 2: Instead, such high pulmonary artery pressures result in acute failure

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Speaker 2: of the ventricle. For example, the pathophysiology scene with a

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Speaker 2: large pulmonary embolism. Third, King George the Second had been

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Speaker 2: having cardiac symptoms for some time.

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Speaker 3: I think that's the important takeaway here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, because he had even even back then, they knew

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Speaker 1: enough about the circulatory system to know that the king

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Speaker 1: had a bum ticker, because he had complained about what

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Speaker 1: would be called distresses and sinkings about the region of

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Speaker 1: the heart if we if we unpack this, because of

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Speaker 1: course there's a little bit of high level medical terminology there.

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Speaker 1: Everybody is saying that his heart gave out. They're just

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Speaker 1: talking about how it gave out and where right, how

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Speaker 1: the how the system broke down with arteries, ventricles, et cetera.

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Speaker 1: We don't know for certain then the absolute specifics of

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Speaker 1: how King George the Second did pass away, but we

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Speaker 1: do know where he died on the toilet.

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Speaker 3: He did he did.

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Speaker 2: Let's move on to another royal who I believe was

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Speaker 2: named Edmund ironside Edmund the Second Edmund, which is a

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Speaker 2: fun spelling of Edmund born circa nine to ninety three

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Speaker 2: died November thirtieth of ten sixteen. He was the King

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Speaker 2: of England from April twenty third to November thirtieth, ten sixteen,

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Speaker 2: and the son of King Ethelred ethel Red the Second

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Speaker 2: the unready.

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Speaker 5: Best king name of all time, and he pops up

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Speaker 5: so often't.

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Speaker 3: He just wasn't ready. He was caught unawares every time.

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Speaker 4: Because this series, I've been learning a lot more about

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Speaker 4: this time in history, which I really didn't know anything about.

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Speaker 4: This guy just is always like omni president. He did

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Speaker 4: nothing as king. He wasn't ready, he was always there.

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Speaker 4: He's always twice.

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Speaker 1: I picture him in like a sitcom where they introduce

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Speaker 1: people by their names. I want him to show up

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Speaker 1: in the sitcom intro mont you know, where the people

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Speaker 1: look towards the camera and do a little bit, and

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Speaker 1: I want him to not have been ready for his

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Speaker 1: shot and his guest slot in the camera, you know.

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Speaker 3: I want him to be on his phone or something.

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Speaker 1: And like Edmund or ooh, making a milkshake anyway, Edmund

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Speaker 1: here street named Edmund Ironside. He possibly died in a

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Speaker 1: similar restroom or water closet location. He went against his

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Speaker 1: dad in the name of romance.

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Speaker 3: His oh you love to see that?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Ethel read the second said I'm not ready classic

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Speaker 1: Ethel red for you to marry the widow of this

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Speaker 1: Danish lord that's occupying English territory. I think you're doing

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Speaker 1: it to up your chances at gaining the throne. And

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Speaker 1: Edmund was like, you're not the boss of me, even

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Speaker 1: though you're thinking so, and you don't understand me.

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Speaker 3: Dad, leave me alone.

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Speaker 1: And nevertheless, when England was invaded later in ten fifteen,

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Speaker 1: Edmund did raise an army in northern England and he

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Speaker 1: ravaged areas of the world that wouldn't back him up.

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Speaker 1: That's how he got the street name Ironside because of

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Speaker 1: his quote staunch resistance to that massive invasion, which was

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Speaker 1: led by a Danish king named Canute.

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Speaker 3: I want to say.

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Speaker 4: Fun note either his son or grandson became king. Also,

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Speaker 4: his name was Hardy Canute. It's probably not how it

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Speaker 4: was pronounced, but it's how it's spelt. Hardy Canute.

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Speaker 2: I love a good hearty Canue. I just let out

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Speaker 2: a hardy Canute.

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Speaker 3: I blame that Chile was.

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Speaker 4: Just be careful, we don't want to have you. On

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Speaker 4: the next part of this series, Ben.

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Speaker 3: Expiring on the commode, no way to go.

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Speaker 2: So when his father ethel Read passed away in April

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Speaker 2: of ten sixteen, there were some you know, counselors and

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Speaker 2: a citizen group of London town that's declared that Edmund

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Speaker 2: was their ruler. But there was also, of course, there's

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Speaker 2: all these disputes when there's a monarch who passes away.

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Speaker 2: There was a larger body of more moneyed gentry, perhaps in.

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Speaker 3: Southampton they declared for Canute.

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Speaker 1: They were like, we liked the Danish guy better, and

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Speaker 1: your dad was just really never ready for anything.

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Speaker 3: He's never on time. They were in cahoots swith Canute.

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Speaker 4: And if I'm remembering correct, I could look this up

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Speaker 4: really quickly, but I'm not going to Knute's dad had

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Speaker 4: been king of England at one point, because there was

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Speaker 4: like I believe that's correct, ethel Red was king, then

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Speaker 4: Knut's dad was king, and Dan ethel Wright was king again,

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Speaker 4: and then now it is Connute versus Edmund, who's ethel

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Speaker 4: Wright's son.

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Speaker 5: Going real game of thrones right here, That's really what's

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Speaker 5: going on.

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Speaker 1: And so Edmund decides to go proactive with it. He says,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be more than ready, and he he

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Speaker 1: launches a series of attacks against his rival Canute. And

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Speaker 1: if Edmund is doing pretty well, he regains control of Wessex,

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Speaker 1: he saves London from a siege. He eventually is defeated

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Speaker 1: by Canute at Ashington in Essex on October eighteenth, and

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Speaker 1: they have a peace settlement. And in this peace settlement,

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Speaker 1: you know, they talk Turkey, they jibber jabber, and Edmund

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Speaker 1: gets to keep possession of Wessex, and Canute gets all

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Speaker 1: the land north of the Thames, the River Thames. And

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Speaker 1: then after Edmund dies, probably of natural causes, we're about

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Speaker 1: to get into it, Canute becomes the sole ruler of England.

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Speaker 1: People are wondering is it? Is it a natural cause?

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Speaker 1: An accident of fate? The dark lottery of unfortunate events

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Speaker 1: Over at grune dot com. Elizabeth Baxmu mentioned earlier, says

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Speaker 1: that Edmund died suddenly on November thirty, ten, sixteen. He

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Speaker 1: was a very young dude. By the way, he was

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Speaker 1: in his twenties and his cause of death was originally

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Speaker 1: listed as having occasion to retire to the house for

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Speaker 1: relieving the call of nature. His brother in law hid

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Speaker 1: in the pit in the outhouse pit and stabbed the

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Speaker 1: king twice what from beneath with the dagger, left the

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Speaker 1: weapon fixed in his butt, and then escaped the bathroom.

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Speaker 3: So death by butt stabbing.

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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, so can we just really quickly paint the picture.

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Speaker 2: These would have been sort of a more brick and

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Speaker 2: mortar version of like a porta potty, right, so there's

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Speaker 2: like an area underneath where the stuff goes. This guy

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Speaker 2: would have been up to his ankles and human waist.

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Speaker 3: Ankles is very optimistic. He would have been in there.

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Speaker 4: He would have remember remember the soap episode. This is

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Speaker 4: one time period where they didn't use soap Paul.

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Speaker 2: Right, right, and so this and what does that matter

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Speaker 2: when he's in human Well, it's because.

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Speaker 4: The humank on to our afterwards he's brought him back

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Speaker 4: and he's like, oh, the king is dead, and is

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Speaker 4: like his.

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Speaker 5: Like pants are just covered in fecal matter. It's like

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Speaker 5: he died on the throat.

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Speaker 2: Everything was fine, I wasn't there exactly. We got to

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Speaker 2: find out who did this. It's like the hot dog sketch,

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Speaker 2: and I think you should leave.

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Speaker 1: And this comes from this description comes from Historia Anglorum,

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Speaker 1: which is a history of England written by Henry of Huntington,

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Speaker 1: first published in eleven twenty nine. Anyway, the other theories

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Speaker 1: say that maybe someone was hiding down there and shot

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Speaker 1: him with an arrow, or maybe somebody was hiding down

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Speaker 1: there and got him in the booty with an iron hook.

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Speaker 3: I bet George R.

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Speaker 2: Martin took some inspiration from a lot of these for

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Speaker 2: what I described earlier.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred percent. Song of Ice and Fire is

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Speaker 1: very loosely inspired by the War of the Roses as well.

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Speaker 1: So this account is heavily disputed. You'll hear a lot

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Speaker 1: of historians, the majority, in fact, I would say today,

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Speaker 1: arguing that Edmund did die from natural causes. But if

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Speaker 1: it's natural causes versus the repugnant story of someone hiding

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Speaker 1: in a little pond of poop to kill you through

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Speaker 1: the butt, then you're gonna go with that story.

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Speaker 3: He left it in there insults to injury.

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Speaker 1: Well, he can't think about it from his perspective. You

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Speaker 1: can't be running around with it. You're already covered in poop,

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Speaker 1: you look suspicious.

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Speaker 2: It would have been so much easier to just like

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Speaker 2: murder people secretly. There were no fingerprints, no DNA, nothing,

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Speaker 2: and you know, it was just about like hearsay. If

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Speaker 2: he didn't have an eyewitness, was there wouldn't have been

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Speaker 2: what's more private than literally the privy and he's no

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Speaker 2: one's gonna be no one else is going to be

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Speaker 2: down there. Yeah, this would have been connected to a sewage,

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Speaker 2: something like a cistern. Perhaps maybe he could have even

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Speaker 2: crept in there from some other introm outside.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm also thinking, you know, the murder weapon would

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Speaker 1: have been the key indicator of regicide because to your point, Max,

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Speaker 1: it probably was way more common for people to run

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Speaker 1: around covered in poop.

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Speaker 3: He was not the only guy who had poop on him.

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Speaker 2: And also, if you're stabbing someone from underneath in the

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Speaker 2: all over you so this guy's covered in poop and

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Speaker 2: blood and potentially guts, because that's where that's what would

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Speaker 2: come out. If you stab someone in the butt hole there,

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Speaker 2: they would get gutted, probably.

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Speaker 5: Especially if you're pushing your strength.

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Speaker 1: And then you're pulling if because to stab twice you

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Speaker 1: would have to.

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Speaker 3: Because was also potentially in play.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, where we might tag this one is explicit because

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Speaker 1: we're talking about prolapsing and disabaliant.

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Speaker 2: This is some goatsy stuff right here. Man, don't look

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Speaker 2: that up. Don't look that up.

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Speaker 1: Well, let's we're since we're up, Since we're already here,

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Speaker 1: let's go to one of the biggest myths.

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Speaker 3: That I'm leaving to be busted.

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Speaker 1: Catherine the Great, which is a way cooler nickname than

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Speaker 1: the Unready. For many years, you may have heard this

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Speaker 1: too growing up, if you were a history buff. For

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Speaker 1: many years, one of the dirty legends about Catherine the

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Speaker 1: Great was that she died having sexual congress with an animal,

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Speaker 1: specifically a horse, that she was a zoophile. That's not true.

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Speaker 3: None of it.

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Speaker 2: That the death I get, But was she I mean,

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Speaker 2: I know she was into some kinky stuff. Have you

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Speaker 2: seen that show The Great on I think it's on Hulu.

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Speaker 2: It's definitely definitely intrigue, Yeah, for sure.

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Speaker 4: I Mean it's just like it's hard to tell what

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Speaker 4: all's real and what's all fake because everyone's slandering everyone.

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Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying not.

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Speaker 2: And I think because she was a strong woman who

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Speaker 2: owned her sexuality, men didn't like that. And I'm sure

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Speaker 2: rumor mongering was just running wild. And what how better

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Speaker 2: to slander someone for their sexuality than to say something

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Speaker 2: vile as vile as this, you know.

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Speaker 5: And you say it after they die, right.

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Speaker 1: And she was also she was also not native to Russia.

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Speaker 1: She was a princess born in Germany who became the

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Speaker 1: Impress of Russia from seventeen sixty two until she passed

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Speaker 1: away in seventeen ninety six.

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Speaker 2: And she got the czarina, a term I was not

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Speaker 2: aware of. I guah, yeah, but that's it's sort of

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Speaker 2: like a queen versus king. I guess I've never heard

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Speaker 2: that term before.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so she only becomes the queen because or the

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Speaker 1: impress is the term they would use. Because her husband

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Speaker 1: saw Peter the third was assassinated. You know, you got

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Speaker 1: to wonder about the state of their marriage was very

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Speaker 1: much a political thing, not a romance thing. People at

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Speaker 1: the upper echelons of society at this time didn't often

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Speaker 1: marry for love. She was married off at age fourteen,

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Speaker 1: and yeah, and the marriage was disastrous because Peter was

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Speaker 1: mentally unstable, extremely neurotic, and max to your point about

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Speaker 1: how history is written. There were a lot of historians

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Speaker 1: posthumously saying that he was impotent. So eighteen years of

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Speaker 1: just an absolute horrible relationship.

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Speaker 2: I think a lot of that is dramatized in The Great.

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Speaker 2: It's been a minute since I've seen it and I

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Speaker 2: haven't finished it, but it's very good and it's very funny. Actually,

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Speaker 2: I believe your ghost Lanthemos has something to do with it.

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Speaker 2: The guy who did The Favorite, and he's got a

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Speaker 2: new movie coming out. It's called Poor Things. It's sort

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Speaker 2: of like a Frankenstein kind of story, with Willem Dafoe

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Speaker 2: as like a Victor Frankenstein tepe figure.

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Speaker 3: It's supposed to be great. I'm a big fan of

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Speaker 3: his work.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely could understand why she would work her way

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Speaker 2: to not taking any crap from anybody after being treated

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Speaker 2: so horribly for so long.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and she did have children or issue as they

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Speaker 1: would be called in royal parlance.

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Speaker 2: I know's yeah, me too, learned so much today, guys.

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Speaker 1: She had a series of lovers, and she herself strongly

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Speaker 1: hinted that none of the kids she had were actually

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Speaker 1: her husband's and when her husband he is Peter was

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Speaker 1: a grand duke when he married this fourteen year old

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Speaker 1: and eventually he becomes the Czar of Russia in seventeen

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Speaker 1: sixty one, and he is terrible at this. All he

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Speaker 1: does is talk trash about Russia and talked about how

438
00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 1: Germany is so much better. Imagine if Steve Jobs went

439
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: up on those Apple you know ted talk things and

440
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:02,160
Speaker 1: just talked about how great micro softwise and said the

441
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:03,199
Speaker 1: iPhone stink.

442
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:06,000
Speaker 3: So that was bizar. He was not good for morale.

443
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,800
Speaker 1: He tried to get rid of his wife several times,

444
00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 1: like as in, kill her, not divorce her. But she

445
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:18,040
Speaker 1: also hated him, and so she joined a conspiracy to

446
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 1: stage a coup. In seventeen sixty two, Peter is arrested,

447
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:26,919
Speaker 1: he is forced to abdicate the throne, and just like

448
00:27:28,240 --> 00:27:32,359
Speaker 1: in a week or eight days, he is murdered. Catherine

449
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,639
Speaker 1: gains the throne and the crown. She is the Impress

450
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:39,479
Speaker 1: for thirty four years. She will rule Russia. You can

451
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:42,080
Speaker 1: imagine this was controversial.

452
00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:47,119
Speaker 2: Indeed, and she ruled I believe quite successfully, right, I mean, yeah,

453
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:53,720
Speaker 2: she did a good job. So when she passed away, Unfortunately,

454
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 2: these rumors started to circulate that, because of her insatiable

455
00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:04,480
Speaker 2: sex drive again quotation fingers here, that she died from

456
00:28:04,520 --> 00:28:09,439
Speaker 2: sustaining injuries resulting from, as you mentioned, ben intercourse with

457
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:15,280
Speaker 2: a horse. The truth, however, while embarrassing, was not nearly

458
00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:20,400
Speaker 2: as inflammatory. The truth in fact, was that she had

459
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:27,040
Speaker 2: been suffering from bouts of constipation and much like our

460
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 2: first entry in today's episode, perhaps may have pushed a

461
00:28:31,840 --> 00:28:35,720
Speaker 2: little too hard seeking relief while on the.

462
00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:38,080
Speaker 3: Privy and suffered a stroke.

463
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:43,960
Speaker 1: She would have been of more advanced years here as well. Right, Yeah,

464
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 1: she was sixty seven. And the thing people don't tell

465
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:52,560
Speaker 1: you about being the Emperor, the Empress, the king, the queen,

466
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:57,040
Speaker 1: really any high level royalty, is that you don't often

467
00:28:57,080 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 1: get to poop alone. You have valets, maids who are

468
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,480
Speaker 1: following around. They're waiting outside the door maybe, and that's

469
00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 1: what happens to Catherine. These folks are her maids. Her

470
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:13,120
Speaker 1: retinue is waiting outside the door for her to finish

471
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:18,200
Speaker 1: her deposit, and she is grunting, she's groaning, she's you know,

472
00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:21,760
Speaker 1: she's making all the noises you've heard at airport restrooms.

473
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:26,360
Speaker 1: And then when she stops grunting. Her maids look at

474
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 1: each other and they say, okay, wow, that was a

475
00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:31,640
Speaker 1: weird one. Thank god, you know, the the Empress has

476
00:29:31,640 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 1: got it out. And they wait and then they keep waiting,

477
00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:38,040
Speaker 1: and they wait longer and longer the minutes drag on.

478
00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:42,400
Speaker 1: Eventually one of them decides to risk their career and

479
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 1: say something like, your majesty all is well.

480
00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:48,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a fine line.

481
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,840
Speaker 2: Right when you're attending to somebody and you have to

482
00:29:50,840 --> 00:29:53,160
Speaker 2: literally wait outside for them to do their business.

483
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:56,160
Speaker 3: At what point do you come and knocking, you know,

484
00:29:56,240 --> 00:29:58,320
Speaker 3: and at out to the death of Stalin.

485
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:02,760
Speaker 4: And like the way like we've we've talked about like

486
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,520
Speaker 4: the czars and the empresses, Like remember we had that

487
00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 4: episode the two part about the Empress that everyone like

488
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:12,200
Speaker 4: hated or whatever was evil, Like if you interrupted, these

489
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 4: people are just wrong.

490
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:13,520
Speaker 5: You're dead.

491
00:30:13,680 --> 00:30:16,520
Speaker 4: You're gonna kill you, they'll execute you, or they'll make

492
00:30:16,560 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 4: you be a jester or something.

493
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 1: Right, right, and Jester the role of the Gester itself

494
00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:25,480
Speaker 1: is an episode when I'm right in the future, because

495
00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 1: that's that's way different than it's portrayed and dressed in

496
00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:33,880
Speaker 1: motley and sometimes yeah, oh it gets we might have

497
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,200
Speaker 1: to tag that when explicit too, so they don't hear

498
00:30:36,240 --> 00:30:40,320
Speaker 1: an answer when when they inquire about the empress, and

499
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:45,120
Speaker 1: so eventually they take a peek into the water closet

500
00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:49,520
Speaker 1: and they find her dead on the commode. According to

501
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:53,120
Speaker 1: again our pals of Britannica, this is not a one

502
00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:56,719
Speaker 1: hundred percent proven story. In fact, they think it is

503
00:30:57,640 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 1: woefully inaccurate.

504
00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:02,320
Speaker 2: I mean, you're gonna print the most interesting version of

505
00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:03,840
Speaker 2: the story, I guess, or at least that's the one

506
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:07,320
Speaker 2: that people are gonna remember. She suffered the event that

507
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:09,960
Speaker 2: led to her death while on the toilet, so for

508
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 2: all intents and purposes, she died on the toilet. However,

509
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:16,160
Speaker 2: the truth is more likely that she actually passed the

510
00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 2: next day as a result of the stroke. She had

511
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,360
Speaker 2: the stroke in the bathroom, and then the next day

512
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:26,200
Speaker 2: she did pass away on November seventeenth of seventeen ninety six.

513
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:29,360
Speaker 3: No horse involved whatsoever.

514
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:34,000
Speaker 1: No horse involved as far as we know, and probably

515
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,680
Speaker 1: not a horse involved in the death of Ironsides, just

516
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:38,560
Speaker 1: because it'd be tough for it to get into the

517
00:31:38,680 --> 00:31:42,520
Speaker 1: lavatory pit. And then, you know, you don't have to

518
00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 1: love horses. But let's face it, they haven't stabbed anyone, and.

519
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:47,840
Speaker 2: They gotta say I've been I went to I've been

520
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:50,280
Speaker 2: taking a lot of tours lately, and I went to

521
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:54,200
Speaker 2: the Detroit Institute of Art, and I was reminded how

522
00:31:54,520 --> 00:31:57,760
Speaker 2: in a lot of like Renaissance paintings there are horses

523
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:02,880
Speaker 2: in the most intense torsions with the really aggressive like

524
00:32:02,920 --> 00:32:05,560
Speaker 2: you know, flared nostrils and they're all reared back and stuff.

525
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,960
Speaker 2: I'm a big fan of the depiction of war horses

526
00:32:08,040 --> 00:32:08,880
Speaker 2: in art.

527
00:32:09,360 --> 00:32:13,200
Speaker 1: There's a great exhibit samurai exhibit here at the High

528
00:32:13,400 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: Museum where you can see real life samurai horse armor.

529
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 3: It is so cool.

530
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:21,240
Speaker 1: Look up a picture if you get a chance, visit

531
00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:24,000
Speaker 1: if you happen to be in town. And then also

532
00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:28,200
Speaker 1: I was at the Prado recently in Madrid, and they

533
00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:30,480
Speaker 1: are all about some of those paintings.

534
00:32:30,480 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 3: Man.

535
00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: I I also like the I also like the weird

536
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 1: symbolism where all of a sudden in a medieval painting,

537
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:42,520
Speaker 1: there's some guy with a snail, or there's yeah, or

538
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:43,920
Speaker 1: there's some guy with.

539
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:47,160
Speaker 3: A well look what kind of hygienk Simon.

540
00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:51,760
Speaker 1: Expression while they're being u while they're being ripped apart. Anyhow, yes,

541
00:32:52,280 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 1: these stories are important, and they tell the way they

542
00:32:56,680 --> 00:32:59,719
Speaker 1: are told tells us about the society in which they

543
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:03,400
Speaker 1: were created. And so it's a struggle. History is an

544
00:33:03,440 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 1: active thing. It is a struggle to determine the truth.

545
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:11,720
Speaker 1: But we're very happy today to end our episode by

546
00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 1: conclusively telling you it's got the Ridiculous History stamp of approval.

547
00:33:17,360 --> 00:33:20,680
Speaker 1: Catherine the Great did not die in some sort of

548
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:24,520
Speaker 1: TMZ situation with a horse, so put some respect on her.

549
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:28,120
Speaker 2: Name indeed, But yeah, I think that gets us through

550
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 2: this installment of royal deaths. That, as Max pointed out

551
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:35,880
Speaker 2: in our conversations off Mike, these are some of the

552
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:38,280
Speaker 2: most popular episodes we do. So we're just giving the

553
00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,400
Speaker 2: people what they want. Y'all are messed up, not Max,

554
00:33:40,760 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 2: March is not us.

555
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:43,880
Speaker 3: But we're good boys and girls.

556
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:48,520
Speaker 4: It is condiments a UFO episode, and this they are.

557
00:33:48,520 --> 00:33:51,000
Speaker 5: They are above everyone.

558
00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:51,320
Speaker 3: Else I've got.

559
00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,240
Speaker 1: I've got more condoment episodes too.

560
00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:56,480
Speaker 3: I always excited. Okay, oh kind of, It's just so great.

561
00:33:56,680 --> 00:34:00,080
Speaker 1: And yes, as Noel said, thank you, as always this

562
00:34:00,160 --> 00:34:03,320
Speaker 1: ridiculous historians, thank you for tuning in. Thanks our research

563
00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:08,680
Speaker 1: associate and super producer, mister Max Williams, and let's all

564
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:12,520
Speaker 1: remember the main takeaway, whether you feel you are a prince,

565
00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:16,919
Speaker 1: a princess, or a pauper or a peasant, don't push

566
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:20,240
Speaker 1: yourself literally, don't push yourself on the toilet.

567
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:23,240
Speaker 2: Or if you're John Popper from Blues Traveler who lost

568
00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 2: a lot of weight and still blows those harmonicas with

569
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:26,400
Speaker 2: a plumb.

570
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:29,680
Speaker 1: And thanks also to christ Vrasiotis, thanks to Eves Jeffco,

571
00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:32,480
Speaker 1: thanks to Alex Williams who composed this.

572
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:35,640
Speaker 3: Slap and bop. Shout out to our pal Gabe luz Yer.

573
00:34:36,560 --> 00:34:40,719
Speaker 1: And oh we also had a Quist run in in.

574
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:43,000
Speaker 3: Vegas, a run in but not an appearance.

575
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 1: No, his rider is crazy as he becomes increasingly villainous.

576
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:50,200
Speaker 3: We'll see you next time, folks.

577
00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:01,120
Speaker 2: For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio Apple Podcasts

578
00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:03,360
Speaker 2: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows,