Speaker 1: Hello, Hello, Hello? Is this gek? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Who is this? Hey?
Speaker 1: What's up? Gek?
Speaker 2: My name's Andrew, Andrew? What's going on? Man?
Speaker 1: Okay? So I guess I'll just start where I tested you.
Speaker 1: So I'm thirty four now, which you know, I mean,
Speaker 1: great midlife crisis or whatever. I came up from a
Speaker 1: pretty bad situation, broken home, drug addiction, all that stuff.
Speaker 1: And as I've progressed in my life, I've kind of
Speaker 1: straightened it all out. But I find myself in like
Speaker 1: bouts of depression and just absolute boredom. The mundane day
Speaker 1: to day is like it's killing my soul. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: in spite of the exciting life that I used to have.
Speaker 2: You know, well, how excited I mean? And you'll, you know,
Speaker 2: only you can truthfully answer this question, But how exciting
Speaker 2: was it? Really?
Speaker 1: I mean, so, just as an example, some of the
Speaker 1: escapades or whatever that I was getting into, I kind
Speaker 1: of had like a violent streak back then, so like
Speaker 1: I would definitely get like a fix of adrenaline on
Speaker 1: a regular basis when I was doing drugs.
Speaker 2: Would you say a violent streak like you.
Speaker 1: Were like I was like clubbing people with tire irons,
Speaker 1: like it was it was pretty okay, pretty bad. Okay,
Speaker 1: thankfully I was one of those people that just wouldn't
Speaker 1: take a plea deal. So I don't have a criminal.
Speaker 2: Record now, Oh there we go. Wait, so when you say,
Speaker 2: don't you know, when you say you didn't take a
Speaker 2: plea deal, what does that mean?
Speaker 1: I mean, I was arrested for a lot of this stuff,
Speaker 1: but I refused to take whatever plea deal that they
Speaker 1: were trying to throw at me in California. And when
Speaker 1: I was trying to take it to court, they would
Speaker 1: always find some way of either expunging or stealing the record.
Speaker 2: Is it though that? Yeah, go ahead, I'll say my
Speaker 2: questions to the end.
Speaker 1: Oh no, that's fine. Yeah. I was just saying, like,
Speaker 1: so with the being sealed and stuff, my my record's
Speaker 1: actually pretty pristine in spite of everything that I was doing.
Speaker 2: And how long have you been clean from meth? For?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 1: It has got to be about fourteen years now. I
Speaker 1: really didn't keep track, but I want to say the
Speaker 1: last time that I can't do math, I was twenty
Speaker 1: four when I stopped, so it's been almost ten years,
Speaker 1: I guess.
Speaker 2: And when you say when you when you use the
Speaker 2: phrase excitement, are you referring to like all the all
Speaker 2: the crazy stuff you were doing ten years ago? Oh?
Speaker 1: Absolutely yeah?
Speaker 2: But now in the in in the past ten years,
Speaker 2: has anything given you, uh, you know, as much, if
Speaker 2: not more excitement than clubbing someone with a tire iron?
Speaker 1: Really, if I'm being fully honest about it, not, really,
Speaker 1: I've found myself just being really bored. I mean, I
Speaker 1: went from basically a borderline poverty to I'm making about
Speaker 1: one hundred and twenty five thousand dollars a year now
Speaker 1: running my own business, and I still haven't found anything
Speaker 1: that really brings me a sense of passion.
Speaker 2: I guess, what do you do?
Speaker 1: So? I actually have a dog walking business that I
Speaker 1: didn't think was going to turn out to be as
Speaker 1: big as it did. But since I'm primarily working in
Speaker 1: affluent areas, I'm able to kind of overcharge, and it
Speaker 1: honestly took off to a point that I wasn't expecting
Speaker 1: it to.
Speaker 2: Can I ask what city or inner state.
Speaker 1: I am near, Palm Beach Island, Florida.
Speaker 2: Okay, And what's your family life like? Do you have
Speaker 2: a girlfriend or anything like that.
Speaker 1: I'm I've had a series of long term relationships that
Speaker 1: just didn't work out. So currently, No, I'm single actually
Speaker 1: for the first time in yeah, and since I was seventeen.
Speaker 1: I'm actually like single and have been remaining so on purpose.
Speaker 1: And then my family life is kind of touchy. It's
Speaker 1: just my family started off with the drug thing and
Speaker 1: then I just kind of picked it up later as
Speaker 1: I got older, So it took me years to kind
Speaker 1: of get to a point where I would bridge that
Speaker 1: gap with them.
Speaker 2: So you've been cleaning sober for ten ten years? And
Speaker 2: have you been when did you set the dog walking business.
Speaker 1: About seven years back?
Speaker 2: Okay, so have you just been bored for ten years
Speaker 2: since you stopped doing all that stuff?
Speaker 1: Honestly? Yeah, you know, my day to day, like I
Speaker 1: I think the most exciting things that I get to
Speaker 1: do at this point is video games or gambling. And
Speaker 1: I think it's mostly gambling because I just kind of
Speaker 1: enjoy being around degenerates.
Speaker 2: How's the gambling going, you know, up and down? And
Speaker 2: the whole time it's been in Palm Beach.
Speaker 1: More or less, I mean, it's been Palm Beach County.
Speaker 2: Do you have a lot of friends down there?
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say a lot, but I have pretty good
Speaker 1: quality friends. I have about like eight people that I
Speaker 1: regularly kind of you know, talk with or meet up
Speaker 1: with for lunches and stuff like that.
Speaker 2: That's a lot. That's that's good. That's a lot of friends.
Speaker 2: Eight friends.
Speaker 1: But if I'm being absolutely honest about it, it's just
Speaker 1: that there is no comparing going and getting Chipotle with
Speaker 1: a couple of friends and then like hitting a tramble
Speaker 1: in park to uh, you know, basically assailing a guy
Speaker 1: in a back parking lot somewhere at a bar.
Speaker 2: You know why, I get like what I mean, for real, man, like,
Speaker 2: do you when you look back upon violent straight like
Speaker 2: you do you? I mean, do you look at it
Speaker 2: like fondly?
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit Most of the people that that
Speaker 1: I ended up, you know, uh having interactions with back
Speaker 1: then in that capacity they kind of deserved it. They're
Speaker 1: they're kind of pieces of ship. Mm hmm. I mean
Speaker 1: either people that would like steal money and beat their
Speaker 1: kids and ship. And I was like, oh yeah, cool,
Speaker 1: no one's going to care. Then It's fine.
Speaker 2: Mm hm Uh. You sound like you're you're primed to
Speaker 2: become the palm beach batman. If that's what you really
Speaker 2: want to do.
Speaker 1: I don't want to though, Like I really like, I
Speaker 1: don't want to. I want to enjoy the life that
Speaker 1: I have. But at the same time, I just find
Speaker 1: it so boring, is okay?
Speaker 2: I mean, over the past ten years, have there been
Speaker 2: any inkling of anything that you desire to want to
Speaker 2: do outside of hitting people?
Speaker 1: To be honest, realistically, I just kind of maybe to
Speaker 1: start some kind of nonprofit or some kind of like
Speaker 1: charity that would benefit the overpopulated dog pounds, the things
Speaker 1: like that. I do have a kind of a passion
Speaker 1: towards helping animals. And while I'm working with you know,
Speaker 1: dogs on a regular basis, these are all very affluent
Speaker 1: families with very well taken care of pets, and there's
Speaker 1: just so many that are like discarded and treated badly
Speaker 1: that I would really like to have, you know, a
Speaker 1: solid place to like just keep them safe. Well said
Speaker 1: safe played with.
Speaker 2: M hmm. I don't know, man, It's interesting, and I
Speaker 2: I feel you on just like life being boring because
Speaker 2: you know, I guess I'm doing like I can't like
Speaker 2: I can't sit still either. I just feel like I
Speaker 2: have to be fucking doing something. Uh. And I've typically
Speaker 2: been able to fulfill that by you know, working on
Speaker 2: projects and work and whatnot. So I mean I think
Speaker 2: I think a nonprofit's a good idea. It's I mean,
Speaker 2: it's certainly I'm gonna say, a nonprofit helping abused animals
Speaker 2: is a better idea for you to cure your boredom
Speaker 2: than to beat beat people up. Yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Think that's fair to say, and I agree with you.
Speaker 1: It's probably a better use my energy and it would
Speaker 1: probably benefit the world more. And you know, it's just
Speaker 1: how do I how do I really just get over
Speaker 1: the fact that it's just so goddamn mundane. I mean,
Speaker 1: there is no rush to it at all. It's it's
Speaker 1: all just strategizing, putting the money aside, and making sure
Speaker 1: that you're scoping out the right property, you know, pushing
Speaker 1: paperwork man.
Speaker 2: Well okay, well ok, well, so we're talking about two
Speaker 2: different things here, because you're saying there's no adrenaline. There's
Speaker 2: a difference between running a small dog walking business is
Speaker 2: not as exciting as beating people up, and nothing is
Speaker 2: as exciting as beating people up.
Speaker 1: Correct, I mean, yeah, just for example, beating people up,
Speaker 1: I mean there was obviously other things, you know, running
Speaker 1: from police doing all sorts of just kind of outlandish experience.
Speaker 1: An is that I can look back on and say, well,
Speaker 1: you know, not everybody got to do that, and I did,
Speaker 1: so well, let.
Speaker 2: Me ask you this because I mean, I assume why
Speaker 2: part of any like recovery communities are you in na
Speaker 2: or anything like that.
Speaker 1: No, I'm I'm actually really bad about that. I I
Speaker 1: stopped on my own, so I kind of have a
Speaker 1: superiority complex about it, like, oh, why don't you just quit?
Speaker 1: I did.
Speaker 2: Well, I guess. I mean, I'm asking because it's a
Speaker 2: very common idea of one taking the excitement that they
Speaker 2: found and whatever their negative behavior was and finding it
Speaker 2: in something else. So it's been done before.
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, I just I really haven't, I guess, engaged
Speaker 1: with that community on that level. And you know, part
Speaker 1: of it's me getting my own way. I know that,
Speaker 1: you know, I can acknowledge my own superiority complex when
Speaker 1: it comes to it. I definitely feel like I'm kind
Speaker 1: of above it, and that's not a good thing, but
Speaker 1: it's just the reality of how I'm thinking about it.
Speaker 1: But I understand that there is a community there that
Speaker 1: could probably help me kind of redirect some of this
Speaker 1: this excess energy that I have.
Speaker 2: I mean, well, I'm also very interested that this is
Speaker 2: not a new problem. This is something you've been having
Speaker 2: to figure.
Speaker 1: Out slow simmering in the past.
Speaker 2: Ten years, and so I'm curious in what ways you've
Speaker 2: addressed attempted to, whether successfully or unsuccessfully address this issue
Speaker 2: in these past ten years.
Speaker 1: Mostly I just say it is what it is, and
Speaker 1: I try and move on day to day. But over
Speaker 1: the course of thousands of days obviously gets a little
Speaker 1: a little hard to continue to just blow it off
Speaker 1: like that. That being said, you know, I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: still doing pretty well for myself, and I understand that
Speaker 1: I can't go back to that kind of a lifestyle
Speaker 1: because it is it's absolutely a waste of my my
Speaker 1: time here. So like, at least I have that understanding.
Speaker 1: And since I know I have that understand like it's
Speaker 1: a little too introspective, but yeah, since I have the
Speaker 1: understanding of that, I feel like it's easier for me
Speaker 1: to just kind of push through the boring parts.
Speaker 2: You should. I have a movie for you to watch.
Speaker 2: It's not helpful at all. It's called The Incredibles.
Speaker 1: I've seen it.
Speaker 2: You've seen the Incredibles. It just like this guy. I mean,
Speaker 2: it's different because it wasn't he wasn't into meth, but
Speaker 2: like he you know, he was. He was He liked
Speaker 2: to beat people up that he felt like deserved it.
Speaker 2: That was his thing, and he was doing pretty good
Speaker 2: at doing that. And then he quit and he went
Speaker 2: into insurance and it made him depressed. And then he
Speaker 2: went to the jungle and then I think he started
Speaker 2: beating people up again. You know what, don't watch that movie.
Speaker 2: Never mind forget I said anything, all right, go to.
Speaker 1: The Amazon, start beating people up. Perfect, got it?
Speaker 2: I mean you could go to the Amazon. I mean,
Speaker 2: I don't know. I this is I only have my
Speaker 2: own perspective on I only really have my own perspective
Speaker 2: on the world, and the perspectives of everyone who I've
Speaker 2: ever talked to, uh if they, you know, nuzzled their
Speaker 2: way into my brain, which I mean, I guess is
Speaker 2: encompassed in my own perspective of the world. But I
Speaker 2: found like when I get when I get fucking bored,
Speaker 2: I just I travel, I go places. Do you I mean,
Speaker 2: do you have the flexibility to do that with your
Speaker 2: dog walking on?
Speaker 1: So I'm actually going to be going to New Orleans
Speaker 1: here in June, just so I can kind of get
Speaker 1: out of my funk, because I have not left Palm
Speaker 1: Beach County in the last seven years since I started this.
Speaker 1: I've been very stationary and stuck here because.
Speaker 2: You haven't even I mean, I mean, how much of
Speaker 2: an attempt have you made to find, you know, new
Speaker 2: and interesting things to do that aren't you know, fantasizing
Speaker 2: about like running from the cops and stuff.
Speaker 1: Well, I just I don't have a lot of people
Speaker 1: that I trust enough to do my job since I
Speaker 1: am working with like multimillionaires and stuff, and I have
Speaker 1: to be basically free key access to their homes and stuff.
Speaker 1: I really I don't want the liability of somebody that
Speaker 1: I don't fully trust going into their house and possibly
Speaker 1: rooting through their shit.
Speaker 2: Maybe not the people that you're meeting at the blackjack.
Speaker 1: Table, probably not. Probably not the degenerates that I prefer
Speaker 1: to time around.
Speaker 2: Not that, not that, not that there aren't you know,
Speaker 2: respectable upstanding citizens playing blackjack, But you did refer to
Speaker 2: them as degenerates.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you know, I just I mean, don't don't
Speaker 1: get me wrong. My close circle of friends, I mean,
Speaker 1: these are these are good people. They're they're firefighters and
Speaker 1: ship but they don't want to come walk dogs. They
Speaker 1: want to be firefighters.
Speaker 2: They you know, what are you doing in New Orleans?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 1: Probably just going to go out there and drink in excess,
Speaker 1: celebrate my friend's birthday while we're there, Uh talk talk
Speaker 1: to women that are not from my town, and uh, yeah,
Speaker 1: catch your flight back.
Speaker 2: I don't know if this is helpful or even what,
Speaker 2: but I've been thinking about this a lot because I
Speaker 2: sometimes think that I'm also I'm also very much in
Speaker 2: this process of trying to figure out how to make
Speaker 2: my life like good, you know. But that's the thing.
Speaker 2: It's already good. But I kind of am like, you know,
Speaker 2: like I just went, well, I went to Thailand for
Speaker 2: ten days, and I'm I'm, you know, traveling a lot
Speaker 2: and whatever. And I'm kind of like, yeah, is my
Speaker 2: life going to be better because I'm going out and
Speaker 2: going crazy and having all these experiences and this and
Speaker 2: that and the other thing, or is it going to
Speaker 2: be better because internally, in my own brain, I've adopted
Speaker 2: a mindset of gratefulness and appreciation for the things in
Speaker 2: my life, whatever those things are and I'm wondering about
Speaker 2: that because like you know, I'm I've done you know,
Speaker 2: this crazy stuff whatever, and I am I am still
Speaker 2: you know, day to day struggling with uh, trying like
Speaker 2: you know, feeling good about life. And so I wonder, like,
Speaker 2: are those things? And I feel very good about doing
Speaker 2: those things, and I know that when I die, I'll
Speaker 2: be able to go, h Okay, we did, we live
Speaker 2: life to the fullest. But I don't know how if
Speaker 2: this stuff that we're looking for is uh, you know,
Speaker 2: outside of our brains are inside of our brains. I'm
Speaker 2: leaning towards and this will probably evolve as I get
Speaker 2: older and have more experience in tackling these issues. But
Speaker 2: I'm leaning towards a bit a little bit of both,
Speaker 2: a little commodation of both. You know. Sometimes I'll use
Speaker 2: this whole like, oh, it's all in my internal brain.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I use it as an excuse to be lazy
Speaker 2: and not do ship. You know what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, So it's a little.
Speaker 2: But it's a little bit about it's a little bit
Speaker 2: of both. But anyway, that's that wasn't advice, all right,
Speaker 2: it's just thoughts. This is that wasn't advice or even
Speaker 2: anything that anyone could be like, hey, you remember when
Speaker 2: you said that, I'd be like, oh fuck, did I
Speaker 2: really say that's? I'm just this is I'm just pontificating.
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't quote me on that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't quote me anything I've ever said.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, that's That's where I'm kind of at
Speaker 1: is at the crossroads of like, am I I have
Speaker 1: my positive accomplishments and my my accolades and everything else
Speaker 1: that I'm doing, which is great. I mean, you know,
Speaker 1: I should be very grateful for that. It's it's it's
Speaker 1: my life's been working out significantly better than it did
Speaker 1: when I was doing that ship.
Speaker 2: I'm going to say, I'm going to say this to
Speaker 2: you is my this is my final piece on this
Speaker 2: phone call. It's you name again, Andrew, Andrew, just beneath,
Speaker 2: beneath everything. My viewpoint on this, whatever you're doing, you know,
Speaker 2: walking dogs, watching TV, play media, whatever you're doing at
Speaker 2: any given moments in your day to day life, at
Speaker 2: this point, there's like a ninety nine chance that it's
Speaker 2: better than doing meth and beating people up. So take
Speaker 2: solace in that.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll take solace in it. I don't know if
Speaker 1: I'll feel fulfilled by it, but I'll take some solace
Speaker 1: in it.
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 2: people of the computer before we go?
Speaker 1: Uck? Pitches, make money?
Speaker 2: Take care? Thanks Andrew?
Speaker 1: All right, greg.
Speaker 3: By? Hello?
Speaker 2: Hello there? What is your name?
Speaker 5: Hi?
Speaker 2: I'm mister Sweetness, mister sweet to be?
Speaker 3: You know a Yeah?
Speaker 2: What where'd you get the name? Mister sweetness?
Speaker 3: Mister Sweetness is actually my performer name when I get there.
Speaker 2: Yes, hold on, mister sweetness is your performer name when
Speaker 2: you get there? Okay, what do you well? What do
Speaker 2: you what do you perform?
Speaker 3: I'm a complete singer. I've been singing for twelve years.
Speaker 2: Okay, what do you mean by get there? Sounds like
Speaker 2: you've been there for twelve years.
Speaker 3: Well, I've been in a special situation. I've been singing
Speaker 3: for twelve years. I've been in a choir. My whole
Speaker 3: life has been like choir for a majority of it.
Speaker 3: That's kind of much how I dictated all my choices
Speaker 3: throughout educational purposes. But I've been singing in the choir
Speaker 3: for twelve years, and I just recently dropped out of
Speaker 3: the a choir program. This's my first time doing my
Speaker 3: own thing, and I'm stuck. I'm like, I have all
Speaker 3: this ambition, I want to do all these things, but
Speaker 3: I steel like I'm stuck until I really make a
Speaker 3: decision on how I want to go about how I
Speaker 3: want to get there, because I think that's important.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what are you trying? What kind of decision
Speaker 2: are you trying to make?
Speaker 3: So? As an artist and I and I plan on having, like,
Speaker 3: you know, a whole Internetsuna image, all that jazz, so
Speaker 3: I don't I'm not worried about that, but I have
Speaker 3: to decide on how I want to get there because
Speaker 3: and this is why I feel like as I look
Speaker 3: back and how I've been deciding on how to get
Speaker 3: where I am, I feel like I've been kind of
Speaker 3: like the villains in this circumstance. I feel like if
Speaker 3: I really want to get to where I want to be,
Speaker 3: I have to have a kind of villainistic mindset on
Speaker 3: how to get there, almost like selfish to that point.
Speaker 2: So, yeah, so you texted me. You said, I think
Speaker 2: I am becoming a villain. That's what you said to me.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm, So what do you mean by that?
Speaker 3: So I know that I h I can be pretty
Speaker 3: stern stubborn when it when it gets there, I have
Speaker 3: no problem about that stuff. I let people know, Hey,
Speaker 3: I could be mean and I'm trying to get stuff done. Currently,
Speaker 3: I'm a manager at my job, and I know I
Speaker 3: like to be in positions of power where I know
Speaker 3: I can control what's gonna happen. I've been like, I've
Speaker 3: been a manager there for three years now, and I've
Speaker 3: did that and I got that position quick. I was like, yo,
Speaker 3: I know what needs to get done. Let me go
Speaker 3: ahead and work up the ranks real quick and so
Speaker 3: I can help you' all out help this situation. And
Speaker 3: it went fast. I got promoted, got my position. I've
Speaker 3: been pretty much borderline running that place besides my general.
Speaker 2: So look, look, man, we're getting a little off track here.
Speaker 2: What do you What do you mean by your becoming
Speaker 2: a villain? What does that mean?
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm going to have to make some
Speaker 3: really hard decisions when it comes to the people I
Speaker 3: associate with the things and directions. I'm going like, Okay,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to start cutting people off and start
Speaker 3: introducing myself to new things. But at the same time,
Speaker 3: that's the right thing to do.
Speaker 2: Okay, so if we're let me back up for a second.
Speaker 2: You desire to you have a lot of stuff you
Speaker 2: want to do. You want to be a professional singer,
Speaker 2: you want to make videos. That's all great. Why I'm
Speaker 2: extremely lost as to why you have decided that you
Speaker 2: need to become a villain to do this.
Speaker 3: I don't think artists are good people. A majority of
Speaker 3: artists well, I mean you can just see it. I
Speaker 3: don't think a majority of artists of how they get
Speaker 3: to where they are and how big they are, I'm
Speaker 3: talking like bigger names, I don't think they're good people.
Speaker 3: I think they've cut a lot of corners, and I
Speaker 3: think they've done a lot of things that they're personally about.
Speaker 3: Like you know, they're not going to tell every other person,
Speaker 3: but I mean, you know they get there, how they
Speaker 3: get They're not saying I'm.
Speaker 2: Gonna I got to mister sweetness, I gotta stop you. Right,
Speaker 2: mister sweetness, You've so you've decided in your brain that
Speaker 2: in order for you to become a successful singer, you
Speaker 2: need to be an asshole.
Speaker 3: Not exactly an asshole, but I have to be selfish.
Speaker 3: I have to really put myself in my goal and
Speaker 3: self before anything like almost like even above my family
Speaker 3: type situation. It has to be number one priority, is
Speaker 3: what I'm feel like it has to be.
Speaker 2: Mister, mister sweetness, Can I ask you something? Yes, have
Speaker 2: you made a single video?
Speaker 3: I make funny videos, but I haven't made a single song.
Speaker 2: Okay, mister sweetness, you've before even releasing a single song,
Speaker 2: before even trying to do anything, before even presenting yourself
Speaker 2: on the internet. As you know, I'm a singer, and
Speaker 2: this before even attempting to reach this goal that you have,
Speaker 2: you have decided that you need to be an asshole
Speaker 2: to do it.
Speaker 3: In a broad sense, I guess I have to.
Speaker 2: Just really, there's, mister, mister sweetness, sweetness, there's there's, there's
Speaker 2: I just my friends, there's no there's there's. I'm just
Speaker 2: telling you, man, you've made this declaration for no reason.
Speaker 2: This is not where your brain should be, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean? Like, dude, just you know, go make stuff,
Speaker 2: Go put yourself out on the internet, and you can.
Speaker 2: I want to. I want to tell you you can
Speaker 2: present yourself however you desire and if how you desire
Speaker 2: to be in this and not even present forget about that.
Speaker 2: If just how you desire to be is mister sweetness,
Speaker 2: sweet guy, nice guy, family man, all that stuff, then
Speaker 2: go fucking be it. Why have you decided that you
Speaker 2: can't be that? You've decided that you can't be that
Speaker 2: literally for no reason, or actually, no, no, I'm not
Speaker 2: gonna say you've decided to be that for no reason,
Speaker 2: because I think the reason you've decided to be that
Speaker 2: is because I don't know, man, you'll you'll think about
Speaker 2: like whatever, Kanye West or fucking I don't know why.
Speaker 2: I just I don't have good examples. But you've just
Speaker 2: decided that the trope of like somebody who's successful is
Speaker 2: an asshole. And you've probably decided that for examples that
Speaker 2: you have, and and those examples are are wrong, and
Speaker 2: that decision is wrong. And I really strongly encourage you
Speaker 2: to stop thinking like that because it's not gonna it's
Speaker 2: not helpful to anybody, that's fair.
Speaker 3: The mindset really stems from, like, I don't know if
Speaker 3: you've ever liked watched like, well, yeah, of course, a
Speaker 3: cartoon is a story like the stories where the villain
Speaker 3: is generally and this is just like storytelling in general,
Speaker 3: and just cartoons and shows up washing stuff. The villain
Speaker 3: is dress up as he's already won. He's he's the
Speaker 3: one winning. He shows it, it shows and it detects
Speaker 3: the story.
Speaker 2: That mister sweetness, I'm sorry, but what what are you
Speaker 2: talking like? Dude?
Speaker 3: Well, I'm it's a comparative.
Speaker 2: Sorry. No, no, no, don't don't don't be, don't be,
Speaker 2: don't be sorry. I'm just like it. I I'm trying.
Speaker 2: I'm telling you this because I don't want you to.
Speaker 2: This is your this mindset that you have is it's
Speaker 2: like defeating you know, you call yourself mistress. And by
Speaker 2: the way, I listen, if you told me right now
Speaker 2: you were like I just I kind of want to
Speaker 2: be an asshole a bunch of people, I'd be like,
Speaker 2: all right, yes, your god given right is you can
Speaker 2: go being out. Okay, if that's what you want to do,
Speaker 2: is be an asshole and go go ahead being out.
Speaker 2: That's that's what you want to do. But that's not
Speaker 2: it's not even That's what makes it extra sad. It's
Speaker 2: not even what you want to do. You know, you're
Speaker 2: not even sitting here like I bet it would be
Speaker 2: awesome to be a dick to people all the time.
Speaker 2: You're you call yourself mister sweetness. You are literally you're
Speaker 2: sitting here like, oh, I want to be mister sweetness.
Speaker 2: I want to be a nice guy, but I think
Speaker 2: I first I have to be an asshole if I
Speaker 2: want to succeed, And that's sad, and I don't think
Speaker 2: that's based off of anything that is remotely true. So
Speaker 2: I strongly encourage you to stop thinking like that and
Speaker 2: just go, you know, make your music, like that's all
Speaker 2: that fucking matters.
Speaker 1: You know, that's very true.
Speaker 3: I do one hundred percent agree with that. And it's
Speaker 3: more of like, am I a bad person or a
Speaker 3: villain in that person in this scenario if I have
Speaker 3: to make a decision where hey, me and this dude
Speaker 3: we were making where we had good chemistry, but something
Speaker 3: happened and he's slowing down, and I feel like I
Speaker 3: need to keep going. And that's that's where I've been,
Speaker 3: like in a lot of positions where I feel like
Speaker 3: I have to cut these people off or like get
Speaker 3: in people or situations I just have to cut it off,
Speaker 3: and I forgot to keep going. But at the same time,
Speaker 3: I'm losing like, you know, friends here and there, and
Speaker 3: like these are like real relationships, and I feel like I.
Speaker 2: So a couple of things. One is that that doesn't
Speaker 2: make you a villain, because I mean, it's just like,
Speaker 2: was this like your boyfriend or this was like a
Speaker 2: guy that you were seeing I have.
Speaker 3: It's just connections from singing from all the years and
Speaker 3: people who have been trying to work with and all
Speaker 3: that jazz, and some relationships just like pass love stuff
Speaker 3: like that. But just in general, I can make these decisions,
Speaker 3: and I don't feel bad about making these decisions. I
Speaker 3: can do it relatively quickly. I can cut people off
Speaker 3: relatively quickly.
Speaker 2: And look and look and look, I do. I do
Speaker 2: think you're okay. I do think you're right in that
Speaker 2: if you want to get successful at something, obviously you
Speaker 2: do have to like have priorities, and you know, yeah,
Speaker 2: you might need to you know, you might decide that
Speaker 2: you want to spend your free time in your you know,
Speaker 2: studio whatever making music instead of like hanging out with
Speaker 2: your homies. But that doesn't mean you have to never
Speaker 2: talk to them ever again. Like and also and also
Speaker 2: that doesn't make you a villain or a bad person,
Speaker 2: you know, especially like romantically, if you're talking about like
Speaker 2: you were gonna you were dating somebody, but they had
Speaker 2: different life priorities than you had. Uh, that's just incompatibility.
Speaker 2: That doesn't make you a villain.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true. Well, then I guess I'm not gonna
Speaker 3: be the villain. I'll be mister Sweetness.
Speaker 2: Your mister sweetness, sweetest guy around.
Speaker 3: Yes, indeed, all.
Speaker 2: Right, here's what? All right? Give us a fucking lick, bro,
Speaker 2: Come on, what's up? Give us? Drop us, drop us
Speaker 2: a tune.
Speaker 3: Oh, let's see what can I drop? What can I
Speaker 3: sing for? Y'all?
Speaker 2: Mister fucking sweetness? Sing us a tune?
Speaker 3: Sing y'all, It's y'all, y'all.
Speaker 4: Listen to the.
Speaker 3: Hell of a Box. Yeah, Hell of a Boss episode
Speaker 3: The Loser Baby the your uh lose the baby lose it.
Speaker 3: Gosh damn baby, you're fucked up, little wine dish. You
Speaker 3: will lose it just like me. You're a screw lose screw.
Speaker 3: Only one star review of your power Bottom at rock
Speaker 3: Bottom and you got company. I love that song.
Speaker 2: What Who's Who's hell of a Boss? I don't know
Speaker 2: what is that?
Speaker 3: Hell of a Boss is a YouTube. This is a
Speaker 3: really really cool thing, and this is like a cartoon.
Speaker 3: You should go into it because it's awesome. It's YouTube
Speaker 3: originated cartoon. So it was a pot it was like
Speaker 3: a pilot. It just it was just running through. It
Speaker 3: beat all the odds. And now it's on Amazon Prime
Speaker 3: and it's called Hotel, not hell of a box. This
Speaker 3: one I'm The song I reference is from Hagden Hotel.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've heard of that. Watch. I've heard of it.
Speaker 3: Definitely recommend it. It's like it'd be all the odds.
Speaker 3: It shouldn't. It shouldn't even be a show because people
Speaker 3: were like, I don't know how I'm gonna get off
Speaker 3: of YouTube. Someone about it and Didsey Pop.
Speaker 5: Is her name.
Speaker 3: I believe she's amazing and she's been running with it.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 2: Well, mister sweetness, Uh, good luck, man, don't I would hate.
Speaker 2: I'm glad we have. I'm glad we had this conversation
Speaker 2: because I really do. I am like, I really I
Speaker 2: mean this. I feel like you have created this mindset
Speaker 2: for yourself that is that is only damaging. It's not
Speaker 2: gonna help you. So I hope you reflect on it.
Speaker 3: Well, thank you for picking up. I really do appreciate
Speaker 3: this is like I've been man, I've been listening to
Speaker 3: podcast for like ever. My workout be blowing through those
Speaker 3: workouts listening to these conversations.
Speaker 2: Just awesome sweetness. All right, man, you have you have
Speaker 2: a good one. Good luck, and I'm all excited to
Speaker 2: see you on uh on.
Speaker 3: Mister sweetness on all platforms. If you want to see
Speaker 3: when I dropped stuff for anyone out there.
Speaker 2: What is it?
Speaker 3: You already know the name, mister sweetness.
Speaker 2: You know the name you got, you got, hold on,
Speaker 2: you got mister sweetness. It's not like mister sweetness six.
Speaker 3: I think TikTok is three because TikTok, but Instagram, mister
Speaker 3: seenis you? I got all that quick. I love his name.
Speaker 2: All right, I'll check you out. I'll check you out.
Speaker 2: Thanks for calling missus, thank you for having me.
Speaker 3: Y'all have a sweet day.
Speaker 2: I don't I guess it just doesn't make what I'm
Speaker 2: laughing because it's just funny that this guy he and
Speaker 2: you know he is, he's a sweet guy. And he
Speaker 2: was so worried because he was convinced that if he
Speaker 2: wanted to like sing, he had to start being an asshole.
Speaker 2: And I don't think I don't know, I don't think
Speaker 2: that that's true, although it would be kind of cool if,
Speaker 2: like if he occasionally was an asshole and he it
Speaker 2: was like mister Sweetness had a sour side, like you
Speaker 2: you get on my you fuck with mister Sweetness, Maybe
Speaker 2: mister Sower comes out. I don't know. Hello, Hi, what's
Speaker 2: your name? Kayla? Well, Kayla? What's up?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 2: How can I get you today? What's going on?
Speaker 4: Got a couple of things going on? Man?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Maybe?
Speaker 4: First off, uh, my mom's a narcissist and she won't
Speaker 4: let me move out of the house, and it kind
Speaker 4: of sucks. I'm like, I'm trying to move on the house.
Speaker 2: How old are you?
Speaker 4: I'm twenty three.
Speaker 2: You're twenty three and your mom won't let you move
Speaker 2: out of the house.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, like I can, you know, but like
Speaker 4: she just keeps gaslighting me, and then so I always
Speaker 4: keep staying and I just feel like really guilt trips
Speaker 4: and I'm not really sure what to do.
Speaker 2: Okay, So well, I mean let me ask you this.
Speaker 2: This is I mean, let's talk financials for a second.
Speaker 2: Do you have a job? Do you have money that
Speaker 2: that you would need to move out of the house?
Speaker 3: I do.
Speaker 4: I Actually I'm engaged, so like, I have a whole
Speaker 4: as fiance and everything, and yeah, I just don't really
Speaker 4: like what the fuck you know?
Speaker 2: I also don't really what the fuck? So you're in gate?
Speaker 2: How old is he?
Speaker 4: He's going to be twenty five?
Speaker 2: Okay, you said that you you were you were preparing
Speaker 2: you that that noise you made just before telling me.
Speaker 2: I was prepared for him to be like forty seven
Speaker 2: years old, and you hit me with a two year
Speaker 2: age gap. Okay, So, uh, I guess I still don't
Speaker 2: understand what's preventing you from from leaving the house. Is
Speaker 2: it like your mom's just like really, I mean, look
Speaker 2: by the way, your mom's not. Your mom is not
Speaker 2: preventing you from leaving the house. Okay, She's just she's
Speaker 2: guilt tripping you. Is that what's happening?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 4: She like gas lights me all the time.
Speaker 2: What is that? What do you what does that mean? Exactly?
Speaker 4: She holds everything over my head. So like, okay, so
Speaker 4: let me let me let me give you an example. Okay, So,
Speaker 4: like the other week, I asked my mom for one
Speaker 4: hundred dollars because she was out of state and I
Speaker 4: was watching her pets for her, which I you know,
Speaker 4: I didn't have to do that, but I did. And
Speaker 4: so I was staying there and I asked her for
Speaker 4: one hundred dollars because I paid for a bunch of
Speaker 4: stuff for the pets while she was gone. And so
Speaker 4: she gave me the hundred dollars, right, She was like, yeah, sure, whatever,
Speaker 4: here's a hundred bucks. And I was like okay. And
Speaker 4: then after she came back, she was like, did you
Speaker 4: drive my car? And I was like, yeah, I drove
Speaker 4: it to my grandma's house, which was like twenty minutes away.
Speaker 4: And so she told me that I needed to pay
Speaker 4: her back for gas. She told me that I needed
Speaker 4: to pay her for the hundred dollars and that I
Speaker 4: didn't deserve it, and then, like she just throws everything
Speaker 4: in my face. And so every once in a while too,
Speaker 4: she'll like be like, oh, like, because the only thing
Speaker 4: that she pays for for me still is my car,
Speaker 4: my car payment, okay, And so because technically it's her car,
Speaker 4: that's the only thing too, I do not have my
Speaker 4: own car, all right.
Speaker 2: So wait, so so hold on, So she doesn't pay
Speaker 2: your car payment. She pays her own car payment, and
Speaker 2: you sometimes use her car, you don't have a car.
Speaker 2: She does not pay your car.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well I have a car that I borrow from them,
Speaker 4: but as far as like her car specifically, like, no,
Speaker 4: I don't pay for anything for that.
Speaker 2: Okay, So Kayla you said your name is yeah, Kayla,
Speaker 2: I get how much money does your mom say that
Speaker 2: you owe her?
Speaker 4: Like six hundred seven hundred dollars a month?
Speaker 2: But no, I'm not a month. I'm talking about it.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about I'm talking about what's a lumps because
Speaker 2: what's a lump sum of money that you could pay
Speaker 2: to your mother to be like, Okay, this is everything
Speaker 2: that you say I owe you as an adult, for
Speaker 2: driving your car, for the pets, for whatever. We're done.
Speaker 2: I'm getting out of here. I'm getting my own place,
Speaker 2: I have my own job, I have a fiance. We're
Speaker 2: getting a thing. What's that amount of money?
Speaker 3: Hmm.
Speaker 4: That's a good question, because that's what I'll try and do.
Speaker 4: I'll be like, okay, there's no thing.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, So you put everything on the table
Speaker 2: and then and then.
Speaker 4: What happens and then something else comes up like oh no,
Speaker 4: this just happened, Like you still have to owe that.
Speaker 4: But then here's the thing. Here's the thing too, Like
Speaker 4: with a car payment or something. She'll be like, Okay,
Speaker 4: you owe me six hundred dollars for your for this
Speaker 4: car payment. But then when I go to pay it,
Speaker 4: she's like, actually, no, it's fine, you don't need to
Speaker 4: pay it.
Speaker 2: Wait, wait, why do you owe her for a car payment?
Speaker 2: If it's not who's whose name is the car in.
Speaker 4: Herst that's what I that's what.
Speaker 2: Then you don't own a car payment, then you don't
Speaker 2: owe a car payment.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I guess that's valid.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Okayler, listen, at a certain points, my mom and
Speaker 2: I know, I know it's true.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and so I just like that and I just
Speaker 4: need to I just need to freaking do it. You
Speaker 4: just freaking do It's really hard. It's been really hard
Speaker 4: for me to freaking do it. I mean, I got
Speaker 4: I go to real therapy.
Speaker 2: Not what's no? No, No, I am absolutely not real therapy.
Speaker 2: You are to me? What is your real Okay? All right,
Speaker 2: what's your What's I do? I do not desire to
Speaker 2: be real therapy to any I am an insane man
Speaker 2: in a gecko costume. What what? What does your real
Speaker 2: therapist tell you?
Speaker 4: I mean pretty much the same thing that like I
Speaker 4: don't know anything, and that mainly a lot of it though,
Speaker 4: is just the way that I grew up because my
Speaker 4: parents kept me very like secluded from other things. So
Speaker 4: all I know is what I know that my parents
Speaker 4: have given me and thrown at me. So like my
Speaker 4: entire life, I've literally grown up with the fact that
Speaker 4: like nothing that I have, like my room, my bed,
Speaker 4: all my stuff, like none of it is actually mine.
Speaker 4: It's theirs. And so that's why I always thought, like, oh,
Speaker 4: I just let me just move out at eighteen, But
Speaker 4: like I've always been scared of like, okay, if I
Speaker 4: leave and they hate me for it, like I'm not
Speaker 4: gonna have anything because all of my stuff or their
Speaker 4: stuff isn't actually mine. So that's why I've been like
Speaker 4: you know, getting different jobs and trying to build up
Speaker 4: money so then like all my stuff that I do
Speaker 4: purchase on my own, I can actually take with me.
Speaker 2: Yes, I want it. By the way, I just wanted
Speaker 2: to say something. I want to say that's it's it's
Speaker 2: a bummer to me because I think, like, if you're
Speaker 2: a good parent, you're not like drawing these crazy fucking
Speaker 2: lines and like being selfish and you know, like you know,
Speaker 2: saying you owe me this, you owe me that, like
Speaker 2: your kid's your kid, you know. I mean so, so
Speaker 2: I'm sorry to hear that you've had this experience where
Speaker 2: your mom is holding all of these things over your head,
Speaker 2: you know, And I think that that's not cool. I
Speaker 2: don't think that that's a good way to parent, and
Speaker 2: I'm sorry that you're having that experience. But I now
Speaker 2: do think that now that you are an adult, now
Speaker 2: that you did get married, now that you have a job,
Speaker 2: it's it's kind of time to be like, Okay, you know,
Speaker 2: I can't control that my mom is holding all of
Speaker 2: this shit over to me, but I can, with my
Speaker 2: own adult money, get out of the house and tell
Speaker 2: my mom. You know, I'm not giving you any more money.
Speaker 2: You're not giving me any more money. We are both
Speaker 2: going to Our relationship now is going to be of
Speaker 2: two people who desire to have each other in each
Speaker 2: other's lives, not two people who are constantly, you know,
Speaker 2: dealing with each other financially. You're no longer dealing with
Speaker 2: each other financially, and you know, yeah, so I guess
Speaker 2: I don't know what's preventing you from from doing that.
Speaker 2: But that's you know, what you gotta do.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that's very valid, and it's just it's been
Speaker 4: a time, you know, and it sounds so silly, you know,
Speaker 4: because I'm literally like twenty three, and I mean a
Speaker 4: lot of people are still living with their parents. But
Speaker 4: like you know, you always hear the thing where it's
Speaker 4: like you either move out your suffer, you stay with
Speaker 4: your parents and you suffer mentally. And sure, yeah, that's.
Speaker 2: I don't think, by the way, I see, I don't
Speaker 2: think there's any shame in like living with it. But
Speaker 2: I lived with my I lived with my parents while
Speaker 2: I was you know, starting doing this podcast, you know,
Speaker 2: and that's that's a great privilege.
Speaker 4: Yeah, But like.
Speaker 2: You know, if it's causing you deep anguish and you
Speaker 2: have a job and you're making money, you know, go
Speaker 2: go out and do it. But I'm gonna tell you something, Kayla.
Speaker 2: We could go and complete in other circles with this,
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna stop us from doing that and say
Speaker 2: that you should just do what you're feeling and your
Speaker 2: goot to do.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's valid.
Speaker 2: Is there anything else you want to say to people?
Speaker 2: The computer before we go?
Speaker 4: I went to your indie show when you came.
Speaker 2: There and it was Indianapolis had a good time.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, I know it was. I know it's
Speaker 4: like a year ago.
Speaker 2: But still no I remember, oh hell yeah awesome. No
Speaker 2: I I I I didn't like that. I by that one.
Speaker 2: I thought I thought I sucked.
Speaker 3: But it was good.
Speaker 4: I mean I honestly, like I was like, what's the
Speaker 4: fus does Indianapolis have to offer? But you know, quite
Speaker 4: a lot, quite a lot, so pretty fun.
Speaker 2: Well, good luck, Kayla, and thanks for thanks. Good luck
Speaker 2: with living in Indianapolis and being a human being on
Speaker 2: the earth. I'll talk to you later.
Speaker 4: Thank you, Thanks, thanks, while bye.
Speaker 2: You know, I it's hard, man, because I I really
Speaker 2: I've been talking a lot about like what I've learned
Speaker 2: from doing this show. And one thing I've learned, like
Speaker 2: just reflecting on my own life is like I've got
Speaker 2: really great parents. I really do, because you know, my
Speaker 2: mom didn't you know, hold anything over me like that.
Speaker 2: And so I'm I'm you know, I empathize with people
Speaker 2: who you know, have have had these kind of situation
Speaker 2: situations like recently, you know, I think I had this
Speaker 2: thing where like I didn't like that my mom like
Speaker 2: was like babying me throughout my life. And you know,
Speaker 2: even after I graduated from high school in college, she
Speaker 2: was still like calling me all the time to ask me,
Speaker 2: like you know, where I was and what I'm doing,
Speaker 2: and and checking in on me. And something something clicked
Speaker 2: to because and I was always like that was always
Speaker 2: bothering me, like you know, hey, I'm an adult, I'm
Speaker 2: you know, uh running all around doing all these things
Speaker 2: like I'm gonna be fine, And then it fucking clicked
Speaker 2: to me. I'm like, bro, like, you know, it's a
Speaker 2: it's a privilege to have your mom calling you and
Speaker 2: checking in on you, you know, like that's a good thing,
Speaker 2: you know, So I uh yeah, I I told her
Speaker 2: the last time she called me, I told her, I
Speaker 2: was like, you know, she said to me, she was like,
Speaker 2: I know that you're twenty and traveling the world, but
Speaker 2: in my brain, you're still four years old. And I
Speaker 2: told her, I was like, you know, I'm sorry if
Speaker 2: I don't always answer your phone calls, but I'm grateful
Speaker 2: that you make them, because especially when you get older,
Speaker 2: you become an adult, it's like nobody's nobody's watching out
Speaker 2: for you anymore. Nobody's making my dent made a dentist
Speaker 2: appointment today. Nobody's making my dentist appointments for me. Nobody's
Speaker 2: making sure that I live my life correctly. You know,
Speaker 2: I'm twenty six, so it's good to have that little
Speaker 2: thing of just your mom calling you, you know. Yeah. Anyway,
Speaker 2: I'm a Gecko. Hello, folks, it's Lyle here. That's the
Speaker 2: end of this episode. But get this, I'm releasing a
Speaker 2: bonus episode this week. That's right, an entire extra hour
Speaker 2: of the podcast that you can listen to by becoming
Speaker 2: a premium member of Therapy Gecko over at Therapy Gecko
Speaker 2: dot supercast dot com. Supercast subscribers get access to bonus episodes.
Speaker 2: They get a completely ad free podcast feed of the
Speaker 2: regular show, they get recordings from my live shows, members
Speaker 2: only streams, and they help support my ability to continue
Speaker 2: doing this podcast. So here's a clip from this week's
Speaker 2: members only bonus episode.
Speaker 5: So I want to talk about how I met my husband,
Speaker 5: which is kind of a freaky story, but I don't
Speaker 5: recommend people normally do stuff like this. I basically met
Speaker 5: him playing Legal Legends. It's been like gaming buddies for
Speaker 5: a really long time. At first, I try to be
Speaker 5: like a home meet and help them out and be
Speaker 5: like yeah, girls, or you're going to talk to just
Speaker 5: you know, like go out like you gotta do this,
Speaker 5: and like actually trying to get him lad, you know,
Speaker 5: like a good friend. So then I offered. I was like, hey,
Speaker 5: I'll take your virginity, like as a joke. But then
Speaker 5: he was like, okay, you said.
Speaker 2: I'll take your virginia joke like you said, well.
Speaker 5: It was half joking but half like but like if
Speaker 5: you want to kind of thing.
Speaker 2: You know, if you want to hear this full conversation,
Speaker 2: you can sign up to become a premium member at
Speaker 2: Therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com or find the link
Speaker 2: in the episode description that's therapy Gecko dot supercast dot com.
Speaker 2: All right, I have nothing else to say, goes on
Speaker 2: the line, taking his own calls every night. They can
Speaker 2: goes to just teaching you cloud of your life. It's
Speaker 2: not really an expert