Speaker 1: This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 1: Chris Harris and Lauren z Ma coming to you from
Speaker 1: the home office in Austin, Texas, Elsie. One of my
Speaker 1: favorite shows that we do is what we're doing today.
Speaker 1: We're taking the listeners questions. I don't know why we've
Speaker 1: gotten away from this other than we've had great guests
Speaker 1: and we've been just knee deep and so many other
Speaker 1: things to talk about on the podcast. But we thought, man,
Speaker 1: we haven't taken a look at the mail bag in
Speaker 1: a while, and we have a bunch of questions from viewers.
Speaker 1: So that's what we're going to do today.
Speaker 2: Thank you all for sending them and through the show's Instagram.
Speaker 2: At the most dramatic pod ever, and we're going to
Speaker 2: dive right in, Babe.
Speaker 3: I'm going to start with a question for you.
Speaker 2: Okay, just a couple bachelor questions right off the bat.
Speaker 3: This one.
Speaker 2: After your interview with Michael Chris, I went back and
Speaker 2: I watched Bachelor Pad.
Speaker 3: It's so good. Why did they get rid of the franchise?
Speaker 1: Interesting? Because so Bachelor Pad evolved into Bachelor Impaired. Bachelor
Speaker 1: Pad was a good show. It was fun, it was
Speaker 1: really done on the cheap. I mean ABC, as I
Speaker 1: said on the podcast if you missed it, ABC really
Speaker 1: just wanted something in that August September time slot. That
Speaker 1: is the death of TV. It's like a wasteland of
Speaker 1: TV is kids aren't in school, you haven't got to
Speaker 1: the fall yet, you're in the late summer, so it's
Speaker 1: always reruns and stuff. And so ABC said, we need
Speaker 1: something to launch the fall shows. Come up with something.
Speaker 1: That's what Bachelor Pad was. Turns out, it was just
Speaker 1: a huge success, but it was a little bit problematic
Speaker 1: in that it was a game show. At the end,
Speaker 1: there was a prisoner's dilemma. A quarter of a million
Speaker 1: dollars was on the line, and the show really became
Speaker 1: about that. And we also have to follow different standards
Speaker 1: and practices. Legally, it's a game show, and we're always,
Speaker 1: you know, as producers were more apt to manipulate and
Speaker 1: bend and try to create drama and love and relationships,
Speaker 1: and you can't do that if there's a quarter million
Speaker 1: dollars on the line. Legally, they weren't supposed to do
Speaker 1: that anyway, And so that is really why Bachelor Pad
Speaker 1: came to an end. And honestly, it became so successful.
Speaker 1: ABC's like, let's do a bigger, better show, and that's
Speaker 1: where Paradise came from. And it became a huge success
Speaker 1: and one of our highest rated shows.
Speaker 3: Oh and they didn't do it this summer. I don't
Speaker 3: know if they'll bring it back.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know they say that they the word is
Speaker 1: they were going to bring it back, but I don't know.
Speaker 1: With the numbers that Bachelor, this Golden Bachelorette has not
Speaker 1: been very successful. The ratings are down considerably and they're struggling,
Speaker 1: don't I don't know they You know, they loved they
Speaker 1: made it big. It was awesome and it employed a
Speaker 1: lot of my friends, including Will's Adams, And I was
Speaker 1: bummed it didn't come back. They they say it is,
Speaker 1: but you know, the networks promise a lot of things.
Speaker 1: We'll see if it comes back.
Speaker 3: Did they actually say it was coming back?
Speaker 1: They did again. I think part of that was because
Speaker 1: they were mad at me for saying it was canceled.
Speaker 1: I didn't say it was canceled. I said it definitely
Speaker 1: was not coming back this summer, which I thought was
Speaker 1: common knowledge. They got mad at me. They had the
Speaker 1: tabloids right immediate article saying that I was wrong and
Speaker 1: I had jumped the gun. I was right, it didn't
Speaker 1: come back. I was like, all you guys got to
Speaker 1: do is wait till June. It's not going to be
Speaker 1: on television. I never got the retraction from those tabloids
Speaker 1: because it was just a statement of fact. I knew
Speaker 1: for a fact that people had already been called. They
Speaker 1: already told the host, they had already told the executive
Speaker 1: producers that the show wasn't coming back, so it wasn't
Speaker 1: a secret. But then they quickly came out and said no, no,
Speaker 1: we'll be back next summer. So I hope they actually
Speaker 1: will be the same.
Speaker 3: Person is bringing up something specific.
Speaker 2: I don't know because I didn't watch Bachelor Pad, but
Speaker 2: Dave planned a full mooch on your lips at the finale.
Speaker 2: I feel like he didn't even kiss Natalie that way.
Speaker 2: Do you remember that.
Speaker 1: David Good, I don't remember that was I assaulted. I
Speaker 1: don't remember that, but I do remember being just so
Speaker 1: shocked at the end of that episode, because you know,
Speaker 1: there's two hundred fifty thousand dollars on the line. I
Speaker 1: don't remember that. I need to go back and.
Speaker 3: Watch, let's go back and watch that.
Speaker 2: Okay, Well, I'll be honest, I didn't even know Bachelor
Speaker 2: Pad was available to watch, Like, are you getting these royalties?
Speaker 3: Where are people watching this?
Speaker 1: I do get some weird royalties sometimes when things are
Speaker 1: sold overseas or you know, it goes somewhere on deep
Speaker 1: cable or something.
Speaker 2: You know, we get a check for like ten cents.
Speaker 2: Royalty checks are hilarious.
Speaker 3: I've seen it. We've both gotten checks for like a
Speaker 3: penny before. It's so funny.
Speaker 2: In both of your jobs and other views of yours,
Speaker 2: asking previously you did not really speak about politics or journalism.
Speaker 2: Why is it something you are speaking about now? Well,
Speaker 2: I don't totally know how to take this because in
Speaker 2: my previous job I was only a journalist, so I
Speaker 2: definitely talked about journalists.
Speaker 3: So maybe people mean more for you.
Speaker 2: But and I don't think that we're you know, we
Speaker 2: are really to make it clear, We've done a couple
Speaker 2: episodes analyzing the media and the media's coverage of this election,
Speaker 2: media ratings and media personalities, how media personalities are conducting
Speaker 2: themselves as journalists, and that that's where our interest lies.
Speaker 2: We never want to tell you guys who to vote
Speaker 2: for or how to vote. But I'm just interested in
Speaker 2: how the media covers it. And we both have deep
Speaker 2: backgrounds in journalism, both went to journalism schools, so definitely
Speaker 2: this is we consider it our industry and we get
Speaker 2: interested in the ratings and how it's being conducted in
Speaker 2: its future.
Speaker 1: I definitely stayed away from it when I was on
Speaker 1: Bachelor and Bacherette because I never wanted that to be
Speaker 1: a topic of discussion.
Speaker 3: Politics.
Speaker 1: Nos, honestly, politics and journalism. I just I didn't dabble
Speaker 1: in any of those things because I knew what people
Speaker 1: were watching the show for, which was I was your escape.
Speaker 1: I wanted to provide that escape. It was a bit
Speaker 1: of a soap opera, if you will, And I always
Speaker 1: wanted to be that for whatever you were going through
Speaker 1: in life, not just politics, but everything. And I've heard
Speaker 1: some great stories that you were our escape if we
Speaker 1: were going through an illness in the family or something,
Speaker 1: and so I was proud to be that. But after
Speaker 1: finding and falling in love with Lauren, there is a
Speaker 1: very particular thing that we are both passionate about. We
Speaker 1: both grew up in journalism, we both cut our teeth
Speaker 1: and journalism and it's important to us and we debate
Speaker 1: this all the time, and that's what we wanted this
Speaker 1: podcast to be was honest and what LZ and I
Speaker 1: are really excited about and talking about. And one thing
Speaker 1: is the rise and fall of journalism, how it's evolved
Speaker 1: and what's going on. And I worked my first job
Speaker 1: was at a news station in Oklahoma City. I was
Speaker 1: a journalist and that's what I graduated college with and
Speaker 1: my degree is in journalism. So it's always been near
Speaker 1: and dear to my heart. It's just I never wanted
Speaker 1: to bring that into my bachelor world. But now that
Speaker 1: you and I have these debates, it is fascinating what's
Speaker 1: going on to us. And so it's what Laura and
Speaker 1: I are talking about is we're eating our dinner. So
Speaker 1: it's what we talk about on the most dramatic podcast ever.
Speaker 2: And there's definitely different modes you can be in, right Like,
Speaker 2: for sure with The Bachelor, you were in host mode,
Speaker 2: but you started as a sports broadcaster. I've never been
Speaker 2: a political journalist. But for example, like even being at
Speaker 2: Entertainment Tonight when it was like election time, we would
Speaker 2: sometimes ask celebrities different political questions I mean, obviously the
Speaker 2: celebrities go out and endorse people, so it could become
Speaker 2: the topic of an interview.
Speaker 3: So there's always going to be a little overlap, and
Speaker 3: you might be in different modes.
Speaker 2: I mean, we see people, I think you always have
Speaker 2: to also look at like who's doing the interviews you're
Speaker 2: watching and what they're bringing to the table, Like a
Speaker 2: Joe Rogan is kind of having a conversation with people
Speaker 2: on his podcast. There are some people who are very
Speaker 2: classically trained journalists who should be doing a more you know,
Speaker 2: gritty interview and really pushing their subject and challenging their subject.
Speaker 2: And then you have some people who like, I don't know,
Speaker 2: like a George Stephanopolis. I mean he was a political consultant, right.
Speaker 1: Who then kind of in the amistration.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so then he became an on air political person,
Speaker 2: but then now he sort of does just interviews with people.
Speaker 2: And that's always interesting to me too because he wasn't
Speaker 2: necessarily trained in that world, but he's come into that world.
Speaker 2: So there's different hosts and modes and overlap, and we're
Speaker 2: fascinated by it all.
Speaker 1: I'm going to change direction here and go to kind
Speaker 1: of what our wheel has else is, and that's love
Speaker 1: and relationships. My fiance still flirts. It is something that
Speaker 1: he just cannot help himself with. I know it's harmless
Speaker 1: and he will be coming home with me. Is it
Speaker 1: okay to continue to let it go and be more
Speaker 1: secure in myself? Or should I say something because it
Speaker 1: does bother me a little bit? What's your take?
Speaker 2: My take is that if it's something that consistently bothers you,
Speaker 2: you have to say something because where is it going
Speaker 2: to go from here? It's only going to fester, it
Speaker 2: will only you'll probably blow up at some point. I
Speaker 2: don't think you can live in a relationship with something
Speaker 2: that underlying bothers you consistently, right, And I'm not talking
Speaker 2: about oh, he doesn't pick his towel up off the floor,
Speaker 2: you know, pick your battles.
Speaker 3: But this seems like a big enough issue to bring
Speaker 3: up to.
Speaker 2: Me, I even just to talk about it, even to just,
Speaker 2: you know, not to come at it from a combative place,
Speaker 2: but to say, hey, you know, can we talk about
Speaker 2: this like it kind of bothers me, It hurts me
Speaker 2: a little bit, And maybe his response will be as
Speaker 2: easily as oh, my gosh, I don't want you to
Speaker 2: feel that way.
Speaker 3: Let me be more aware of that.
Speaker 1: People don't know until you say something. So the worst
Speaker 1: thing you can do in this situation is let it go.
Speaker 1: Let it fester, because as you said, it's bothering you
Speaker 1: a little bit, and it will manifest anxiety with you
Speaker 1: and resentment, and eventually that resentment is going to cause
Speaker 1: a bigger problem. So, as Lauren just said, and I
Speaker 1: will echo, you don't have to, you know, do it
Speaker 1: in an attacking way, because it doesn't. It's not the
Speaker 1: end all be all to you, as you said, but
Speaker 1: I definitely would say, hey, babe, look, I know you're
Speaker 1: a flirt and honestly, that's one of the things I
Speaker 1: like about you is you're so personable and charismatic. But
Speaker 1: it does bother me sometimes it goes a little bit
Speaker 1: too far. And look, I love you and I know
Speaker 1: you're going home with me. Can you just be cognizant
Speaker 1: of that so you know, it's all in how you
Speaker 1: articulate it, so he's not defensive. And because it probably
Speaker 1: is something you adore about him, that he was so
Speaker 1: flirty with you and so fun to.
Speaker 3: Be around, I will say we had more on the
Speaker 3: definition of flirt here.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, there's a big spectrum.
Speaker 2: I will say, I think people can talk to people
Speaker 2: of other genders and other like, we all have to
Speaker 2: be comfortable and confident in allowing our partner to converse
Speaker 2: with other people.
Speaker 3: But flirting to.
Speaker 2: Me, like, you know, you don't if you're the guy
Speaker 2: and you're engaged to somebody else and you're like, I
Speaker 2: don't know, pulling in another woman to sit on your lap,
Speaker 2: and it's oh, just flirting, No, not okay to me.
Speaker 2: Everybody can feel where their line is.
Speaker 1: Another very interesting one, babe. And I'm dating someone who
Speaker 1: drinks and I am not a big drinker. I feel
Speaker 1: like he wishes I drink more. Do you think a
Speaker 1: relationship with people on two sides of the drink to
Speaker 1: be social fence could work?
Speaker 2: I think that you need to be it a pretty
Speaker 2: similar level of social of socializing as your partner.
Speaker 3: I do.
Speaker 2: I've dated people with addiction struggles in the past, and
Speaker 2: I will say it's hard because when someone is and
Speaker 2: this person obviously isn't talking about addiction, but just like
Speaker 2: for comparison's sake, when someone has an addiction issue, that
Speaker 2: has to be like a major priority in their life.
Speaker 2: It has to be for them to stay healthy, and
Speaker 2: it's hard if you're somebody who likes to like go
Speaker 2: out and socialize and have a drink and your partner
Speaker 2: isn't that comfortable with it, or it's even potentially problematic
Speaker 2: for them. I think that it really helps to be
Speaker 2: in a relationship where you socialize similarly like you. You know,
Speaker 2: what I always say is we all want to enjoy life. Right,
Speaker 2: We'll find somebody who enjoys life the same way as you,
Speaker 2: and your life's going to be a lot easier and
Speaker 2: have a lot less conflict. I think drinking at the
Speaker 2: same level, liking to go out at the same level.
Speaker 2: You know some people are homebodies in their relationship together.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I think that's a potential problem.
Speaker 3: What do you think?
Speaker 1: I agree, And you know, you and I have this
Speaker 1: discussion a lot. I think when we're young, you hear
Speaker 1: that opposites a track, opposites a tract, and you know.
Speaker 3: You think I want someone who balances me.
Speaker 1: This person's nothing like me at all. He's a homebody.
Speaker 1: I love to go out and party. We're perfect together.
Speaker 1: You grow up and you learn hmm, I like to
Speaker 1: go out and party and he's a homebody.
Speaker 3: And now I'm out alone. And because I'm out, do.
Speaker 1: You have to be exactly the same? No, And I
Speaker 1: think it is wonderful that you have different attributes than
Speaker 1: I have and vice versa, and we push each other
Speaker 1: and pull each other in different directions to expand our horizons.
Speaker 1: But with that said, I do think similar interest. I'll
Speaker 1: be honest. I love wine. I love going to the
Speaker 1: wine country. We just recently took a trip back to
Speaker 1: where we got married, which was Napa Valley. You love
Speaker 1: it as much as I do. You love the people,
Speaker 1: you love the romance of it. And neither one of us,
Speaker 1: I would say, are huge drinkers. But we both do
Speaker 1: it about the same level, I would say, and it's
Speaker 1: something that's a part of our relationship. And I do
Speaker 1: think that that is important.
Speaker 2: I think you need one of You're going to be
Speaker 2: happy if you find someone who likes to live life
Speaker 2: the same way as you.
Speaker 1: So I'll ask you one more question. You need to
Speaker 1: lead this off. This is in your wheelhouse. I am
Speaker 1: having such a hard time getting back into dating after
Speaker 1: my divorce. My self esteem is down and I don't
Speaker 1: want to get on the apps any advice to get
Speaker 1: myself to a place where I am more comfortable to
Speaker 1: get out there. And I'll just let you know too.
Speaker 1: We have a great podcast with doctor Viviana Coole and
Speaker 1: it's kind of dabbles a lot in this, so look
Speaker 1: for that on the most dramatic podcast ever. But Babe,
Speaker 1: this is so in your wheelhouse.
Speaker 3: Well yours too. We're both devor says, but thank you.
Speaker 1: You're just a good hype woman.
Speaker 2: Oh, I just want to give this woman so much hype.
Speaker 2: One thing I hate hearing from friends of mine who
Speaker 2: have gotten divorced or had big breakups is they're afraid
Speaker 2: to get out there. They are you know, they don't
Speaker 2: want to start over that kind of thing. I just
Speaker 2: think we need a massive rebrand on all of these terms.
Speaker 2: Divorce can be a good thing. It's a hard thing,
Speaker 2: but it can be a good thing. Obviously something wasn't working.
Speaker 2: Now is your chance to find something better. Starting over
Speaker 2: can be a great thing. And my biggest thing about
Speaker 2: dating after divorce.
Speaker 3: Look at it as practice.
Speaker 2: This date isn't going to make or break your happiness level.
Speaker 2: It's not going to make or break who you are
Speaker 2: as a person. If it goes horribly. You have a
Speaker 2: great story to tell your friends. When I got divorced,
Speaker 2: I thought, well, I'm going to go out and date,
Speaker 2: and like, who cares what happens. I don't have if
Speaker 2: this date goes badly, I don't have to ever see
Speaker 2: this guy again. And I just looked at it as like,
Speaker 2: let me just go have some fun, meet people, see
Speaker 2: what's out there. And I think dating, like, I actually
Speaker 2: think it's a good thing. To go on as many
Speaker 2: dates as you can. You're getting your reps in, You're
Speaker 2: getting that fear out of you.
Speaker 3: Like it's just like the ten thousand hour rule. You
Speaker 3: get better at something when you do it a lot,
Speaker 3: like go out on a lot of dates.
Speaker 2: More than you might even want to with people you
Speaker 2: might not even feel that confident about, just to get
Speaker 2: yourself feeling good and confident and get that practice in.
Speaker 1: I'm guessing the person that asks this is a little
Speaker 1: bit older. You might even have kids, much like I
Speaker 1: did when I started dating, and I look at it,
Speaker 1: what would you tell your child as they start dating?
Speaker 1: What would your advice be? Would it be be timid,
Speaker 1: be afraid it's scary out there? No, you would tell
Speaker 1: your son or daughter get out there. Life's waiting for you.
Speaker 1: Yeah you're going to trip and fall, but that just
Speaker 1: makes for a good story. You pick yourself up. You've
Speaker 1: learned more about yourself. You learn what you like, you
Speaker 1: learn what you don't like, and that makes you better
Speaker 1: for the next person, and then you're going to learn again.
Speaker 1: So what advice would you give a friend? What advice
Speaker 1: would you give your child? Take that advice? It is
Speaker 1: so hard to look in the mirror. But yeah it's daunting,
Speaker 1: Yeah it's scary. But would you tell anybody that those
Speaker 1: are reasons to not get out there and play the game?
Speaker 1: So true we are.
Speaker 2: I always say I try to give myself the advice
Speaker 2: I would give a friend. And you know, I want
Speaker 2: to note here this person says my self esteem is down.
Speaker 3: I hate hearing that from you. I'm sorry and I
Speaker 3: get that.
Speaker 2: You know, when you've been through divorce a rejection period,
Speaker 2: you know, our self esteem takes a hit, and then
Speaker 2: we fear dating is going to be more rejection, our
Speaker 2: self esteem will take more of a hit. But what
Speaker 2: I want to say there is I think everybody out
Speaker 2: there is feeling that way. I think you know, people
Speaker 2: on dating apps everybody's feeling insecure.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and let me just add one more thing. Your
Speaker 1: self esteem might be down because maybe you got out
Speaker 1: of a bad relationship. Maybe he or she said something
Speaker 1: that really hits you, you know, in a bitter way
Speaker 1: as they were walking out the door. You know, it
Speaker 1: can help your self esteem being flirted with, being hit on,
Speaker 1: going on a date, having a good makeout session. So true,
Speaker 1: you don't feel higher in life than when those dopamine,
Speaker 1: you know, and it all kicks in when someone just
Speaker 1: smiles at you from across the bar buys you a drink.
Speaker 1: It doesn't even have to lead to anything but go
Speaker 1: out there and find that. That will build your self esteem.
Speaker 3: All right.
Speaker 2: More dating in a relationship questions. I have been dating
Speaker 2: my boyfriend for four years and he forgot my birthday.
Speaker 2: It's been a few days, still nothing.
Speaker 3: How should I handle it?
Speaker 1: Call a spade a spade man. At this point, you
Speaker 1: got to call it out. It's not like just be like, hey, babe,
Speaker 1: not for nothing, but you missed my birthday. It was
Speaker 1: five days ago. That was a big miss. And my guess,
Speaker 1: if he's a good person, he will throw himself at
Speaker 1: the mercy of the court and be like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I can't believe I did that. I can't fathom how
Speaker 1: bad I would feel if I missed your birthday, and
Speaker 1: or vice versa, if you missed mine, we would be devastated.
Speaker 1: If life's happening, who knows what he's going through or
Speaker 1: she's going through. Give him a little grace. If you
Speaker 1: really love this person. It's not a career ender, it's
Speaker 1: not a relationship ender. Have a little grace. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, don't just let the animosity build. Say something.
Speaker 1: Just be like, hey, it hurt me a little bit.
Speaker 1: My birthday was last week. Be honest.
Speaker 3: It could be a good wake up call moment.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I don't think it's a relationship ender, but
Speaker 2: I but I do.
Speaker 3: You think it's a moment where that person will hopefully
Speaker 3: be very sorry. My heart really make it up to you.
Speaker 1: You know, it's funny. My heart just went out to
Speaker 1: the person that forgot. I think. I'm just like, oh god, buddy,
Speaker 1: what did you do? Well?
Speaker 2: And their reaction can tell a lot, right if they
Speaker 2: get mad at you back, or if they aren't sorry, well,
Speaker 2: that certainly tells you a lot.
Speaker 1: If he or she comes back with you know how
Speaker 1: busy I am, then that's a big red flag.
Speaker 2: But you know when people say when people like forget
Speaker 2: birthdays and stuff and they aren't sorry about it and
Speaker 2: they say they're busy, I'm like, it's on the same
Speaker 2: day every year. They had a whole year to prepare
Speaker 2: for it. Okay, So I don't like the busy excuse.
Speaker 1: I have a great question to end on. Shall we
Speaker 1: end sure? Okay, what elements of different dating shows would
Speaker 1: you put together to make your ultimate dating show? I
Speaker 1: wanted to end with this is the answer is I'm
Speaker 1: not going to give you an answer, because we're going
Speaker 1: to show you. Lauren has taught me in our relationship show,
Speaker 1: Don't Tell We're going to show you we have some
Speaker 1: exciting stuff in the hopper, and we're going to show you,
Speaker 1: not tell you of what we think will make the
Speaker 1: ultimate most dramatic dating show ever.
Speaker 2: Thank you everybody. We definitely yeah, we already have that
Speaker 2: in mind. I think so it's going to be really exciting.
Speaker 2: We appreciate all your questions. Thank you for bringing the
Speaker 2: best kind of drama into our lives, and we love
Speaker 2: you so much. And dm us at the show's Instagram
Speaker 2: anytime yeah.
Speaker 1: At the Most Dramatic Pod at the Most Dramatic Pod
Speaker 1: on Insta and you can always reach us there, and
Speaker 1: obviously you can always reach Elsie and I via our
Speaker 1: Instagram as well. So good talking to you, Thank you
Speaker 1: for your questions, thank you for listening. We love you guys,
Speaker 1: and we'll do it again next time because we have
Speaker 1: a lot more to talk about. Thanks for listening. Follow
Speaker 1: us on Instagram at the Most Dramatic Pod ever and
Speaker 1: make sure to write us a review and leave us
Speaker 1: five stars. I'll talk to you next time.