WEBVTT - Putting Yourself First | Golden Hour

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. Thanks for

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<v Speaker 1>joining us. How are you doing, Susan?

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<v Speaker 2>Hi? I am so happy to be back, and today

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<v Speaker 2>we are going to be answering more of your questions.

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<v Speaker 2>We absolutely love these episodes, don't we, Kathy?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh so fun?

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<v Speaker 2>So keep those questions coming, and you know what to do,

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<v Speaker 2>Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour and submit them

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<v Speaker 2>so we can talk about it.

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<v Speaker 1>No question is too big or too small, right Susan.

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<v Speaker 1>We love answering them, but today we're really excited to

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<v Speaker 1>get into our questions. But for Susan, what do you

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<v Speaker 1>think of last night's episode of The Golden Bachelor? Direct?

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<v Speaker 2>God, where do I start? First of all, my favorite

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<v Speaker 2>dress was her in the green at the Rose ceremony.

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<v Speaker 2>I was texting Carrie, going good job.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, I just I want if you don't if you

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<v Speaker 1>and I do not say this at the same time

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<v Speaker 1>pasco where it's too high maintenance. But I love them.

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<v Speaker 1>I absolutely Well. You know what, Susan Pascal, if you're listening,

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<v Speaker 1>if Jenny hasn't chosen you, you're all.

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<v Speaker 2>Susans, yes, because a run for your money.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well, I'm sorry. I haven't done laundry in forty years.

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<v Speaker 2>I love that. Okay, I would love to be such

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<v Speaker 2>a queen.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean really, but you won't be a queen, sweetheart,

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<v Speaker 1>You'll be doing his laundry.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I will not. I would be easy. Well, I think, well,

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<v Speaker 2>if you're going to reach out for me, just no,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm just as queen as you can be. How about

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<v Speaker 2>Taylor Dane being there?

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<v Speaker 1>Unbelievable? Who was it that dated? I can't remember? Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>but wait, I loved Greg doing Pascal's laundry. I mean there,

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<v Speaker 1>he was.

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<v Speaker 2>Giving him one hundred bucks a load.

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<v Speaker 1>I know because you hear what he said, goes his cloes.

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<v Speaker 1>His underwear is more valuable. Love and the USA untreated

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<v Speaker 1>sleep apnea. That was who the guy is? Great?

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<v Speaker 2>Because they were all complaining about his snoring. They were

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<v Speaker 2>mocking his.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care. I want to meet him. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>care if he snores. I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>I think you should wait. How about the pink tuxedo

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<v Speaker 2>on Jonathan at the prom and he was prom king it.

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<v Speaker 1>Was you can you imagine the girl canceling him right

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<v Speaker 1>before the prom?

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know how many times that must happen to people?

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<v Speaker 2>A lot, but he held on to it for forty

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<v Speaker 2>plus years.

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<v Speaker 1>And he's king of the problem. Last night, I was

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<v Speaker 1>so sweet, Okay, what about guy was break dancing on

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<v Speaker 1>the floor.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, that was hysterical. And then the other one came

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<v Speaker 2>and spun him around the help.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you seeing? Somebody had to come and lift him up, like,

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<v Speaker 1>come on, guy, but he gets wait for the.

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<v Speaker 2>First one on and one, Kathy, I've got vibes. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>if you don't, I don't know. I think I think

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<v Speaker 2>my guy here is gonna go.

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<v Speaker 1>Really, I'm sorry. He wasn't your guy. If you go

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<v Speaker 1>back and listen.

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<v Speaker 2>No, no, not my guy. You know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 2>I think they Chuck and her have a lot of chemistry.

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<v Speaker 1>Then Charles talking about losing his wife to an aneurysm.

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<v Speaker 1>I just oh, so sad. And and then I'll tell

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<v Speaker 1>the one that got me aside from you know about

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<v Speaker 1>the photo booth.

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<v Speaker 2>And then she gave him the picture of.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, I know, it's so sweet, but Dan, okay, Dan,

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<v Speaker 1>so that my sister has that a couple of people

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<v Speaker 1>in my family have that. It's called a benign non

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<v Speaker 1>essential tremor. It's not Parkinson's or anything. It's just a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of people get it, and he has it in

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<v Speaker 1>both of his hands.

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<v Speaker 2>Did you hear when he told the story that the

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<v Speaker 2>doctor hold him like your life was pretty much over?

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<v Speaker 2>I guess it was a mistake. Is that a mistake.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, since he's still with us, I'm going to go

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<v Speaker 1>with the obviously, But I'm just saying to be able

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<v Speaker 1>to be that vulnerable on National TV, clearly, I have

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<v Speaker 1>a guy I dated has it. It's really hard. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>they can't hold glasses, they have to do things with

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<v Speaker 1>two hands. It's it. Just my hat is off to

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<v Speaker 1>Dan for sharing that on National TV.

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<v Speaker 2>It took a lot, and you know what, I also

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<v Speaker 2>think it helped him come out of his comfort zone,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, like it made him deal with what he

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<v Speaker 2>has and nationally of course, and I think maybe he'll

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<v Speaker 2>be better for it.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think I think, you know, it doesn't kill you,

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<v Speaker 1>makes you stronger. And then I have to say Kim

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<v Speaker 1>singing that romantic song to Joan about finding his person

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<v Speaker 1>over the rainbow. Remember, my husband was a naval officer,

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<v Speaker 1>he was not a captain.

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<v Speaker 2>I always think of him, Kathy every time.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, but I saw I saw in one of

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<v Speaker 1>the promos. I saw him on the floor cleaning up.

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<v Speaker 1>I thought, oh boy, that is a captain of the

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<v Speaker 1>Navy everything.

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<v Speaker 2>What I wish about him that he laugh a little bit,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I don't see his humorous side yet. I think

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<v Speaker 2>he's very serious.

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<v Speaker 1>Not everybody is a laugh a minute. And I think

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<v Speaker 1>he's a genuinely nice guy. And I may say he

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<v Speaker 1>certainly is not. What did you think about Jack going home?

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<v Speaker 1>I know, I mean, I love the song at the end.

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<v Speaker 1>He's my kind of guy. That guy.

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<v Speaker 2>Wait, I did the cannon balls.

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<v Speaker 1>In the pool, Susan, you and he. I mean, I

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<v Speaker 1>was diving at the end of the pool. But this guy,

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<v Speaker 1>you can tell he genuinely left nothing on the table.

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<v Speaker 1>He had a I mean, I didn't really see Joan

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<v Speaker 1>and him together. But what a great fun guy. Wouldn't

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<v Speaker 1>you love to go out on the town.

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<v Speaker 2>All the guys are going to miss him. I'm telling you,

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<v Speaker 2>he was your entertainment.

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<v Speaker 1>They were like, hi Jack, cha, but what what a

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<v Speaker 1>cool guy. And some of the other guys that went home,

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<v Speaker 1>Joe was so sad to set them home. We all

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<v Speaker 1>would be I mean that, I know, I just I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like she is really caring for their hearts. She

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<v Speaker 1>really she kept.

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<v Speaker 2>That high maintenance man.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, okay, I mean he's a good looking guy. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>just saying, you know, I think that that's who he is.

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<v Speaker 1>You got to hand it to him. He's vest is

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<v Speaker 1>who I am. I don't do my laundry. I you know, I.

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<v Speaker 2>Make his bill in the closet. To see his closet.

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<v Speaker 1>Did you see his Gucci his I mean, I can't

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<v Speaker 1>even I don't even know the names. You know, my Louistan,

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<v Speaker 1>my Gucci, my, this my bad. You know what I

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<v Speaker 1>was thinking, Susan.

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<v Speaker 2>Then he's.

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<v Speaker 1>We have to sneak into the mansion. We're going into

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<v Speaker 1>his closet and we are ripping everything out of there.

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<v Speaker 1>With the cellar on the black market, I don't know that.

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<v Speaker 1>I think he's tall, but he looks a little bit.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know if things would fit me, But it.

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<v Speaker 1>Doesn't matter if you're selling them. It's called we're gonna

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<v Speaker 1>make money on the stale, Suasan.

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<v Speaker 2>But but he did an awesome haircut for his talent.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to ask you about that. Yes, it was

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<v Speaker 2>a great haircut. It was one hundred and seventy five

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<v Speaker 2>dollars haircut.

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<v Speaker 1>But did he do it in thirty seconds or do

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<v Speaker 1>you think that was time lapse?

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<v Speaker 2>No, he did it in thirty didn't you see him

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<v Speaker 2>take one chunk off the bat hair?

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<v Speaker 1>I hate to tell you just lost me as a client.

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<v Speaker 1>A client. I'm going to Pascal because I know I could.

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<v Speaker 2>Do it in thirty seconds. You want that blunt clipper cut,

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<v Speaker 2>you want it sharp? That takes more time.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, And and let's be clear, I'm not paying one

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<v Speaker 1>hundred and seventy five dollars here obviously. Well, maybe you

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<v Speaker 1>know what if I sell Pascal's shoes and belts for

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<v Speaker 1>not money, I'll have me. Then.

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<v Speaker 2>I loved Also when Mark was talking in German and

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<v Speaker 2>the end he wanted a kiss, and then she said,

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<v Speaker 2>you should have asked me sooner.

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<v Speaker 1>I know. And Joe did a great job. My son

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<v Speaker 1>is fluent in German, so I had a little cheat there.

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<v Speaker 1>I knew what he was saying, I knew what exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>But how great was she? She really was pretty able

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<v Speaker 1>to she did good. I don't know. I think I

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<v Speaker 1>think this is a great season. I think Joan is

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<v Speaker 1>making us proud, She's making the Golden People proud. She

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<v Speaker 1>is handling herself with such dignity and grace and being

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<v Speaker 1>so kind all the men and Joan, if you're listening,

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<v Speaker 1>so proud of you and all you guys. Susan and

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<v Speaker 1>I will put our numbers up. Very simple.

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<v Speaker 2>Just stay tuned to our podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>That's right.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I absolutely love the whole evening, and as you said,

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<v Speaker 2>she did a fabulous, fabulous job. I did feel for

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<v Speaker 2>some of the people that went home. They weren't really

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<v Speaker 2>ready but can stay. Yeah, I mean, I remember in

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<v Speaker 2>our season when we said goodbye to the first batch.

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<v Speaker 2>But however, Kat, if you remember that first week when

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<v Speaker 2>they left, we had three less people in our bedroom.

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<v Speaker 1>I know, but don't you think don't you think that

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<v Speaker 1>just like when we left, we left stronger and more confident.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel like those guys did too. I think it

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<v Speaker 1>helped get to the show. It's one you have that experience.

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<v Speaker 1>You definitely gained something. Yes, yes, I can't wait till I.

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<v Speaker 2>Can't wait for next week, I know, and I can't

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<v Speaker 2>wait for more one on ones. That's when you really

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<v Speaker 2>see people and they tell their story.

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<v Speaker 1>But don't you wait a minute. But Susan, don't you

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<v Speaker 1>feel like last night's episode lest I can't tell time,

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<v Speaker 1>which is always a possibility. It was two hours and

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<v Speaker 1>I thought it was two hours. Maybe it wasn't our

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<v Speaker 1>it's supposed to be an hour. Name I know, but

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<v Speaker 1>I again, I have trouble, you know, if it's not digital,

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<v Speaker 1>and I remember, I'm struggling here. But I think one

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<v Speaker 1>of the great things about Jones season, on top of

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<v Speaker 1>all these handsome, wonderful guys and and watching Joan, is

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<v Speaker 1>that we're getting to know all the guys much faster

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<v Speaker 1>and better, right because there's more time.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, yeah, what we see more, That's what I'm saying. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>we see more. I don't know that they have longer

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<v Speaker 2>time than we did as they sit for those few

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<v Speaker 2>minutes when they get to chat. I don't know if

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<v Speaker 2>that's long.

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<v Speaker 1>No, no, no, I'm just saying exactly what you said the

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<v Speaker 1>first time. We're getting to see more Jones interactions with

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<v Speaker 1>the guys, and so I feel like I'm getting to

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<v Speaker 1>know them better.

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<v Speaker 2>Did you also notice who's coming on next show?

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<v Speaker 1>Gary?

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<v Speaker 2>Are Gary?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay? So there's been a lot of stuff on social

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<v Speaker 1>you know, do you think he's going to try to

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<v Speaker 1>rip Joan back? Or I think absolutely not. I think

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<v Speaker 1>he's just going to support her.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, he's our buddy. You know, we made friends

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<v Speaker 2>instantly and we still are.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, but still I want the Gucci loafers, belts and sneakers.

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<v Speaker 1>But it's been it's been a great two weeks. You

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<v Speaker 1>can't wait for the next one.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely, I'm excited. And I loved her fashion. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>how about her coming out of the Limma with the

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<v Speaker 2>d white with the tool on both sides for prom night,

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<v Speaker 2>and then she did her Disney blue you know in

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<v Speaker 2>Disney World.

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<v Speaker 1>That was so she looks she did look like a prince.

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<v Speaker 2>She can wear anything. Hello, she can wear any.

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<v Speaker 1>She can do anything. We hate you, Joan, No, we don't.

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<v Speaker 1>We love you.

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<v Speaker 2>We love you unbelievably so. But we wish you all

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<v Speaker 2>the very best and we look forward to next week.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, Susan, it's time for a question of the day.

0:11:45.520 --> 0:11:48.720
<v Speaker 1>Are you ready? Boy? Are you ready? No?

0:11:50.000 --> 0:11:52.400
<v Speaker 2>Oh wait, it's not the game. Yes, sure, I'm ready

0:11:52.400 --> 0:11:52.920
<v Speaker 2>for the question.

0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:53.920
<v Speaker 1>There we go.

0:11:54.240 --> 0:11:58.120
<v Speaker 2>Okay, The question is what does being a good parent

0:11:58.679 --> 0:12:01.520
<v Speaker 2>mean to you?

0:12:01.520 --> 0:12:06.240
<v Speaker 1>You know, for me being a good parent, you'd have

0:12:06.320 --> 0:12:10.520
<v Speaker 1>to say, now, you have to put a time limit

0:12:10.600 --> 0:12:13.040
<v Speaker 1>on it, because being a good parent for me when

0:12:13.080 --> 0:12:17.320
<v Speaker 1>my children were young was making sure they were well fed,

0:12:18.000 --> 0:12:23.880
<v Speaker 1>got enough sleep, kept safe, exposed them to lots of

0:12:24.080 --> 0:12:29.079
<v Speaker 1>cultural things, books, making sure they were learning things in school,

0:12:29.200 --> 0:12:32.280
<v Speaker 1>all those things that you do for young children. But

0:12:32.400 --> 0:12:35.600
<v Speaker 1>I will tell you now, and I have adult children

0:12:35.679 --> 0:12:39.120
<v Speaker 1>and I have two grandchildren, I think being a good

0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:44.040
<v Speaker 1>parent to me now means listening to my kids and

0:12:44.160 --> 0:12:47.199
<v Speaker 1>just being there for them and not solving their problems

0:12:47.240 --> 0:12:49.280
<v Speaker 1>for them as we do. You know, we have to

0:12:49.440 --> 0:12:52.560
<v Speaker 1>evolve as parents. We solve all their problems when they're young.

0:12:53.040 --> 0:12:55.600
<v Speaker 1>When they get older, our job is to listen and

0:12:55.679 --> 0:12:58.320
<v Speaker 1>just be a support system for them. What about you.

0:12:58.600 --> 0:13:02.840
<v Speaker 2>I agree with everything you say, and I also feel

0:13:03.600 --> 0:13:07.200
<v Speaker 2>good parenting is loving your kids and like you said,

0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:13.679
<v Speaker 2>keeping them safe, getting them an education, just healthy, clean teaching,

0:13:14.080 --> 0:13:17.600
<v Speaker 2>teaching them what they're going to pass on so they

0:13:17.640 --> 0:13:21.199
<v Speaker 2>could be good parents. What we instill in our kids.

0:13:21.200 --> 0:13:25.280
<v Speaker 2>Although I was in eat freak always and not all

0:13:25.280 --> 0:13:27.040
<v Speaker 2>of them are in eat freak, so you know I

0:13:27.080 --> 0:13:27.559
<v Speaker 2>still do.

0:13:27.840 --> 0:13:30.360
<v Speaker 1>I still do love to remind you of the time

0:13:30.400 --> 0:13:33.840
<v Speaker 1>you were sweeping up the table while I was still eating.

0:13:34.400 --> 0:13:36.440
<v Speaker 1>You know, it's funny when you talk about that when

0:13:36.840 --> 0:13:38.880
<v Speaker 1>I am, I think if I could do it over,

0:13:38.960 --> 0:13:41.600
<v Speaker 1>like most things, I would be. I have great, three

0:13:41.640 --> 0:13:43.520
<v Speaker 1>great kids, but I think I would be a better

0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:46.079
<v Speaker 1>parent now because they.

0:13:46.080 --> 0:13:47.840
<v Speaker 2>Didn't come with instructions. I know.

0:13:47.920 --> 0:13:50.400
<v Speaker 1>Well, it's just that you and I. I know you

0:13:50.440 --> 0:13:53.079
<v Speaker 1>and I've talked about this. We both have three kids.

0:13:53.120 --> 0:13:56.640
<v Speaker 1>We have great kids, but we have learned what's important

0:13:56.679 --> 0:13:59.160
<v Speaker 1>and what isn't. And so all the things that I

0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:03.520
<v Speaker 1>was so or were important with my kids, they just aren't.

0:14:03.800 --> 0:14:07.280
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I laugh when I think I'm also a

0:14:07.320 --> 0:14:09.200
<v Speaker 1>neat freak. I used to make my kids clean up

0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:12.000
<v Speaker 1>their rooms. And I walked in Kyle's room one time,

0:14:12.520 --> 0:14:14.839
<v Speaker 1>and uh, I told them all to clean the room,

0:14:14.880 --> 0:14:17.240
<v Speaker 1>and Kyle came out. I was said, you know, uh,

0:14:18.120 --> 0:14:20.440
<v Speaker 1>be a smart be smart Kyle. He would come out

0:14:20.480 --> 0:14:22.440
<v Speaker 1>after five minutes and tell me the room was clean,

0:14:23.080 --> 0:14:25.320
<v Speaker 1>and I would go in him it was, well, it

0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:28.320
<v Speaker 1>was clean, Susan, it was spotless until you looked under

0:14:28.360 --> 0:14:31.800
<v Speaker 1>the bed and open the closet doors. It just all

0:14:31.800 --> 0:14:35.560
<v Speaker 1>came floating. So then I would, you know, throw everything

0:14:35.600 --> 0:14:37.320
<v Speaker 1>out in the hallway and make them start over. So,

0:14:37.520 --> 0:14:40.720
<v Speaker 1>you know, do I care? Would I care now so much? Nah,

0:14:40.880 --> 0:14:41.920
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't care.

0:14:42.040 --> 0:14:44.000
<v Speaker 2>I know, I hope I was a good parent. I

0:14:44.040 --> 0:14:46.960
<v Speaker 2>think I was. I know we all love each other.

0:14:47.280 --> 0:14:49.440
<v Speaker 1>Would you well, I love my children, I do agree

0:14:49.480 --> 0:14:52.640
<v Speaker 1>with Would I do some things different, yes, definitely, But

0:14:52.720 --> 0:14:55.280
<v Speaker 1>you know what I think of our kids. I never

0:14:55.360 --> 0:14:58.000
<v Speaker 1>really felt that loved as a child. I know my

0:14:58.080 --> 0:15:01.760
<v Speaker 1>three kids are totally love and would feel would say

0:15:01.760 --> 0:15:02.400
<v Speaker 1>that that they.

0:15:02.240 --> 0:15:04.520
<v Speaker 2>Were absolutely absolutely all.

0:15:04.480 --> 0:15:07.160
<v Speaker 1>Right, let's get into these fan questions. You want to

0:15:07.160 --> 0:15:07.840
<v Speaker 1>take the first one?

0:15:08.440 --> 0:15:14.720
<v Speaker 2>Sure, Okay, this is an anonymous Hello, golden ladies. I've

0:15:14.760 --> 0:15:18.160
<v Speaker 2>got what I believe is a pretty unique question for you.

0:15:19.160 --> 0:15:21.400
<v Speaker 2>At the start of this year, I was laid off

0:15:21.400 --> 0:15:25.760
<v Speaker 2>from a company i'd worked at for over seven years,

0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:32.119
<v Speaker 2>and have since launched a metaphysical podcast and more recently

0:15:32.160 --> 0:15:36.920
<v Speaker 2>started my own psychic reading business. It's been a major

0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:46.800
<v Speaker 2>period of growth and self exploration. Hold on the questions

0:15:48.560 --> 0:15:52.560
<v Speaker 2>I have stems from a longtime friend who has not

0:15:52.800 --> 0:15:57.120
<v Speaker 2>been supportive of this journey. For context, we met sophomore

0:15:57.160 --> 0:16:00.120
<v Speaker 2>year of college through a sorority and have been friends

0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:03.760
<v Speaker 2>for eleven years. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding

0:16:03.800 --> 0:16:08.200
<v Speaker 2>as well. We've always had different beliefs, but it's never

0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:11.120
<v Speaker 2>gotten in the way of our friendship until now. Back

0:16:11.120 --> 0:16:14.000
<v Speaker 2>in April, a few weeks after my pod launched, we

0:16:14.120 --> 0:16:17.800
<v Speaker 2>got lunch and she told me she hadn't listened. Her

0:16:17.880 --> 0:16:23.600
<v Speaker 2>conflicting beliefs have made her afraid of my content. I

0:16:23.760 --> 0:16:27.560
<v Speaker 2>calmly explained that psychic readings aren't like that, and the

0:16:27.600 --> 0:16:32.640
<v Speaker 2>first few episodes of our show focused on intuitive experiences

0:16:32.880 --> 0:16:38.760
<v Speaker 2>we've had, mostly predating our friendships, astrology, and human design.

0:16:39.080 --> 0:16:41.800
<v Speaker 2>I kept it together as we changed the subject, but

0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:46.160
<v Speaker 2>my heart completely sank. I knew this friendship was or

0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:49.720
<v Speaker 2>soon twould be, at a fork in the road where

0:16:49.760 --> 0:16:53.680
<v Speaker 2>either she accepted me or I had to end our relationship.

0:16:53.760 --> 0:16:57.040
<v Speaker 2>Needless to say, I cried on the drive home and

0:16:57.160 --> 0:17:02.920
<v Speaker 2>felt devastated. Fast forward till now. My podcast has continued

0:17:03.000 --> 0:17:06.440
<v Speaker 2>and I launched my business in June. We haven't spoken

0:17:06.480 --> 0:17:09.120
<v Speaker 2>at all. Normally, one or the other of us would

0:17:09.200 --> 0:17:11.520
<v Speaker 2>reach out to meet in person or do a FaceTime

0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:16.199
<v Speaker 2>to catch up. I've been reevaluating all of my friendships

0:17:16.440 --> 0:17:20.119
<v Speaker 2>and how I approach dating to set better boundaries where

0:17:20.240 --> 0:17:24.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm not always the person to reach out. That shift,

0:17:24.600 --> 0:17:28.480
<v Speaker 2>in tandem with being busy, has resulted in the months

0:17:28.800 --> 0:17:34.600
<v Speaker 2>absolutely flying by. My question is should I A reach

0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:37.320
<v Speaker 2>out to her and act normal and just see if

0:17:37.320 --> 0:17:39.560
<v Speaker 2>she says anything about what I'm up to and go

0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:43.719
<v Speaker 2>from there, or B reach out and directly bring up

0:17:43.760 --> 0:17:47.719
<v Speaker 2>my concerns, or see continue doing my own thing and

0:17:47.800 --> 0:17:51.560
<v Speaker 2>see if she eventually comes to me in her own time.

0:17:52.200 --> 0:17:54.800
<v Speaker 2>I so appreciate getting your perspectives on this.

0:17:54.960 --> 0:17:55.280
<v Speaker 1>Also.

0:17:55.840 --> 0:18:00.600
<v Speaker 2>I'm from Massachusetts and love hearing Kathy represent much love

0:18:00.680 --> 0:18:05.040
<v Speaker 2>to you both. I really enjoy your show. Oh thank you, Anonymous.

0:18:05.480 --> 0:18:06.919
<v Speaker 2>That was a lot of information.

0:18:07.440 --> 0:18:10.560
<v Speaker 1>That was a lot of information, Anonymous. I love that

0:18:10.600 --> 0:18:13.320
<v Speaker 1>you're from Massachusetts. Yeah. I always love to hear from

0:18:13.320 --> 0:18:16.120
<v Speaker 1>a fellow Massachuset. I don't even know what the noun

0:18:16.240 --> 0:18:20.160
<v Speaker 1>is anyway. I don't know a Massachusetts site. I don't

0:18:20.160 --> 0:18:23.879
<v Speaker 1>know what that is. Anyway. Let me say, Anonymous, you

0:18:24.000 --> 0:18:27.879
<v Speaker 1>gave me three choices, gave us three choices. Here's what

0:18:27.920 --> 0:18:32.080
<v Speaker 1>I would say to you. The months are flying by

0:18:32.200 --> 0:18:34.720
<v Speaker 1>for you, so you're clearly happy in what you're doing,

0:18:35.240 --> 0:18:39.639
<v Speaker 1>and sometimes in life, we all make choices. In your case,

0:18:39.960 --> 0:18:44.520
<v Speaker 1>it's your podcast and your business, and you seem completely

0:18:45.240 --> 0:18:49.840
<v Speaker 1>involved and thoroughly happy with your decision. So I would

0:18:49.920 --> 0:18:53.440
<v Speaker 1>say to you, you can wait, or you can reach

0:18:53.480 --> 0:18:56.240
<v Speaker 1>out to your friend, or you can do nothing. Here's

0:18:56.320 --> 0:19:01.560
<v Speaker 1>the point. Your friend is entitled to believe and feel

0:19:01.560 --> 0:19:05.800
<v Speaker 1>the way she does, just as you are. And sometimes,

0:19:05.840 --> 0:19:08.600
<v Speaker 1>as Susan likes to say, people come into our lives

0:19:08.680 --> 0:19:11.000
<v Speaker 1>for a reason, and I say, people come into our

0:19:11.000 --> 0:19:14.600
<v Speaker 1>lives for a reason and a season. So maybe this

0:19:14.960 --> 0:19:19.280
<v Speaker 1>time is up for you. We're involving this friendship. But

0:19:19.520 --> 0:19:22.719
<v Speaker 1>just accept that not everyone's going to agree with you,

0:19:23.320 --> 0:19:25.720
<v Speaker 1>and you sometimes have to go on your own journey

0:19:25.760 --> 0:19:26.480
<v Speaker 1>in your own road.

0:19:26.520 --> 0:19:28.399
<v Speaker 2>What do you think, Susan, It sounds to me like

0:19:28.440 --> 0:19:31.800
<v Speaker 2>she has moved on and doing her own thing and

0:19:31.840 --> 0:19:36.520
<v Speaker 2>she's healthy for it. But you, like, just like in relationships,

0:19:37.160 --> 0:19:41.160
<v Speaker 2>you have to agree to disagree. Not everybody believes what

0:19:41.200 --> 0:19:44.399
<v Speaker 2>you believe or shares the likeness for what you're doing.

0:19:44.600 --> 0:19:47.919
<v Speaker 2>And that's okay. I know it probably stung because she

0:19:48.040 --> 0:19:50.199
<v Speaker 2>was your friend and you wanted everybody to be happy

0:19:50.280 --> 0:19:52.720
<v Speaker 2>for you and so on. I get it, but like

0:19:52.840 --> 0:19:56.760
<v Speaker 2>Kathy said, the three things, at the end, that's only

0:19:56.800 --> 0:20:01.520
<v Speaker 2>your choice. Me personally, I would probably think about it

0:20:01.560 --> 0:20:04.000
<v Speaker 2>from time to time, but I would keep moving forward.

0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:08.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, at the end of the day, your life is

0:20:08.680 --> 0:20:11.720
<v Speaker 1>your life and it's your journey, and we both wish

0:20:11.800 --> 0:20:16.920
<v Speaker 1>you the best in your business and your podcast as

0:20:16.960 --> 0:20:22.200
<v Speaker 1>fellow podcasters. Congratulations to you and hope only to do.

0:20:22.200 --> 0:20:24.200
<v Speaker 2>A reading for us.

0:20:25.520 --> 0:20:30.560
<v Speaker 1>Okay, so good lucking out? Question all right? Question number two,

0:20:30.640 --> 0:20:34.359
<v Speaker 1>Casey writes, Hi, Kathy and Susan. I am really enjoying

0:20:34.359 --> 0:20:37.640
<v Speaker 1>your episodes and advice on the podcast and could really

0:20:37.720 --> 0:20:40.800
<v Speaker 1>use your perspective. I am twenty three years old and

0:20:40.840 --> 0:20:44.200
<v Speaker 1>I recently got into a relationship with someone five years

0:20:44.200 --> 0:20:47.040
<v Speaker 1>older than I. We met on a dating app and

0:20:47.080 --> 0:20:51.840
<v Speaker 1>I am his first relationship and sexual partner. I have

0:20:51.960 --> 0:20:56.280
<v Speaker 1>been in relationships previously and had a self proclaimed hoe

0:20:56.400 --> 0:21:01.200
<v Speaker 1>phase while I was in college. Whoa that I've been

0:21:01.240 --> 0:21:04.359
<v Speaker 1>with other men, But early on in dating I didn't

0:21:04.359 --> 0:21:07.520
<v Speaker 1>share just how many partners I have had. Now that

0:21:07.560 --> 0:21:10.280
<v Speaker 1>we're in a relationship and are hooking up with each other,

0:21:10.760 --> 0:21:13.119
<v Speaker 1>I'm scared to bring it up. Do I have to

0:21:13.200 --> 0:21:15.879
<v Speaker 1>tell him the exact number? Or is this something we

0:21:15.920 --> 0:21:19.080
<v Speaker 1>can gloss over? Thank you so much and I can't

0:21:19.160 --> 0:21:20.360
<v Speaker 1>wait to hear your.

0:21:20.200 --> 0:21:26.920
<v Speaker 2>Thoughts, Casey, darling. Unless he's putting pressure on you, yeah,

0:21:27.000 --> 0:21:28.200
<v Speaker 2>keep your mouth shut.

0:21:28.760 --> 0:21:31.879
<v Speaker 1>Oh, I'm sorry, Susan. Even if he's putting pressure on her.

0:21:32.000 --> 0:21:37.000
<v Speaker 2>This was her past. Yes, he don't tell, Yeah, you don't.

0:21:37.680 --> 0:21:40.760
<v Speaker 2>That's going to make him overthink things and think. And

0:21:40.800 --> 0:21:43.560
<v Speaker 2>he doesn't have to know you had your hoe face either.

0:21:43.920 --> 0:21:47.439
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. See, I'm stuck, Casey on maybe this is my

0:21:47.560 --> 0:21:49.919
<v Speaker 1>age and I don't know where you'll go with Susan.

0:21:49.920 --> 0:21:54.200
<v Speaker 1>But I don't like the fact, Casey, that you called

0:21:54.200 --> 0:21:58.080
<v Speaker 1>it your hoe face. I don't like that that tells

0:21:58.119 --> 0:22:01.600
<v Speaker 1>me that you tell it. I could be wrong, but

0:22:01.680 --> 0:22:05.200
<v Speaker 1>I said that you're not respectful of yourself. You don't

0:22:05.200 --> 0:22:08.679
<v Speaker 1>respect yourself or you didn't back then. And that's a

0:22:08.880 --> 0:22:12.240
<v Speaker 1>much greater concern to me than whether or not you

0:22:12.280 --> 0:22:14.800
<v Speaker 1>tell your boyfriend if it was eight, ten or one

0:22:14.880 --> 0:22:18.320
<v Speaker 1>hundred sexual partners you've had. It's none of his business.

0:22:18.680 --> 0:22:22.680
<v Speaker 1>A it's only his business if you're having sexual partners

0:22:22.960 --> 0:22:27.159
<v Speaker 1>with other men besides the guy you're dating.

0:22:27.600 --> 0:22:29.879
<v Speaker 2>And she says, I'm scared to bring it up. So

0:22:29.920 --> 0:22:34.639
<v Speaker 2>he's obviously not even questioning it, so leave well enough alone. Yeah,

0:22:34.880 --> 0:22:38.800
<v Speaker 2>And I've been because gloss Over, I've had these conversations

0:22:38.840 --> 0:22:42.200
<v Speaker 2>with my girlfriends and like you, know how many partners,

0:22:42.240 --> 0:22:46.680
<v Speaker 2>and I was blown away by some of my friends, like, ah, what,

0:22:48.080 --> 0:22:50.000
<v Speaker 2>you know what, I didn't judge them for that.

0:22:50.520 --> 0:22:54.800
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you know, well she's judging herself soon like that.

0:22:54.920 --> 0:23:00.720
<v Speaker 1>So Casey, if you found a great guy, stick with that, meaning, relish,

0:23:01.440 --> 0:23:03.880
<v Speaker 1>revel in the fact that you found a really great guy.

0:23:03.920 --> 0:23:06.600
<v Speaker 1>He's five years older, he's got a little more experience.

0:23:07.160 --> 0:23:09.600
<v Speaker 1>Maybe he's the guy for you, Maybe he isn't. I

0:23:09.600 --> 0:23:11.320
<v Speaker 1>would say, you got a lot of life left to

0:23:11.359 --> 0:23:16.080
<v Speaker 1>live before you settle down with one guy. But don't

0:23:16.119 --> 0:23:17.480
<v Speaker 1>worry about your past.

0:23:17.600 --> 0:23:18.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but the.

0:23:18.440 --> 0:23:21.040
<v Speaker 1>Past is what teaches you how to live your future.

0:23:21.440 --> 0:23:25.280
<v Speaker 2>That's right, and we wish you luck, all right. Question

0:23:25.359 --> 0:23:29.000
<v Speaker 2>number three, Alicia writes, Hi, first of all, I love

0:23:29.119 --> 0:23:32.200
<v Speaker 2>listening to your podcast. My husband and I are planning

0:23:32.240 --> 0:23:36.040
<v Speaker 2>a trip to Italy to celebrate our ten year wedding anniversary.

0:23:36.280 --> 0:23:40.240
<v Speaker 2>We have three children, ages three, five, and seven. It's

0:23:40.280 --> 0:23:43.680
<v Speaker 2>been two years since my husband and I have had

0:23:43.680 --> 0:23:47.800
<v Speaker 2>a trip away alone. I know it will be good

0:23:47.840 --> 0:23:50.879
<v Speaker 2>for our marriage, but I am feeling very anxious and

0:23:50.880 --> 0:23:53.920
<v Speaker 2>guilty about leaving our kids for eight nights and going

0:23:53.960 --> 0:23:57.760
<v Speaker 2>that far away. Is going on this trip a bad idea.

0:23:57.920 --> 0:24:00.639
<v Speaker 2>Please give me any advice. Thank you. Oh my gush,

0:24:00.640 --> 0:24:02.919
<v Speaker 2>it's so good. You need to do this for the

0:24:03.000 --> 0:24:03.840
<v Speaker 2>kids as well.

0:24:05.040 --> 0:24:07.919
<v Speaker 1>So, Alicia, I would say to you, Uh, you know

0:24:08.320 --> 0:24:12.440
<v Speaker 1>my kids. My daughter doesn't like to leave her daughter

0:24:12.520 --> 0:24:14.880
<v Speaker 1>at all, but she'll leave it with me. I guess

0:24:14.880 --> 0:24:17.040
<v Speaker 1>I would ask you, Alicia, who are you leaving your

0:24:17.119 --> 0:24:20.560
<v Speaker 1>kids with? If you're going to living with your mom

0:24:21.040 --> 0:24:25.160
<v Speaker 1>or a sister, a family member, that's great. I will

0:24:25.200 --> 0:24:27.399
<v Speaker 1>say to the first trip my husband and I took away.

0:24:28.640 --> 0:24:31.600
<v Speaker 1>We were living in Texas and we went to Hawaii

0:24:32.680 --> 0:24:35.120
<v Speaker 1>and some friends kept our We only had one child

0:24:35.160 --> 0:24:38.879
<v Speaker 1>at the time. I cried pulling away from the curb

0:24:39.640 --> 0:24:43.600
<v Speaker 1>for about thirty seconds. Uh, it was the best thing

0:24:43.640 --> 0:24:45.439
<v Speaker 1>we ever did. You'll have a blast. Are you going

0:24:45.480 --> 0:24:48.200
<v Speaker 1>to miss your kids? Yes, you'll be fine.

0:24:48.000 --> 0:24:50.600
<v Speaker 2>And you'll go buying them things over there, and you'll

0:24:50.600 --> 0:24:52.240
<v Speaker 2>be thinking, and then you're both going to look at

0:24:52.280 --> 0:24:55.280
<v Speaker 2>each other as you sleep in and go, oh my god,

0:24:55.480 --> 0:24:56.400
<v Speaker 2>this is nice.

0:24:56.680 --> 0:24:59.359
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you're gonna you have a great time. And you

0:24:59.400 --> 0:25:02.960
<v Speaker 1>know what brings up something that we've talked about before.

0:25:03.520 --> 0:25:06.159
<v Speaker 1>You have three young kids and they take a ton

0:25:06.560 --> 0:25:10.040
<v Speaker 1>of time and energy, but you know what needs time

0:25:10.080 --> 0:25:14.679
<v Speaker 1>and energy. Your marriage and relationships take time and energy,

0:25:14.800 --> 0:25:18.800
<v Speaker 1>So give yourself the gift of this time to spend

0:25:18.800 --> 0:25:23.359
<v Speaker 1>with your husband. Go, relax, enjoy yourself. You'll come back

0:25:23.840 --> 0:25:26.960
<v Speaker 1>being in a better place in your marriage, and if

0:25:26.960 --> 0:25:29.040
<v Speaker 1>it's good now, it'll be even better when you come back,

0:25:29.080 --> 0:25:31.639
<v Speaker 1>and you'll also come back a better parent. It's a

0:25:31.680 --> 0:25:33.040
<v Speaker 1>win win, Alicia.

0:25:33.200 --> 0:25:36.560
<v Speaker 2>To answer your question, No, this trip is not a

0:25:36.600 --> 0:25:37.800
<v Speaker 2>bad idea at all.

0:25:38.600 --> 0:25:40.720
<v Speaker 1>And have a great time and let us right but

0:25:41.560 --> 0:25:46.439
<v Speaker 1>send us supposed card. Yeah really, I just got back

0:25:46.480 --> 0:25:58.320
<v Speaker 1>from Italy. You're going to have great time. All right.

0:25:58.400 --> 0:26:03.720
<v Speaker 1>Let's move on to question for Hi, Kathy and Susan.

0:26:04.119 --> 0:26:07.239
<v Speaker 1>I've been really stressed out about this situation and I

0:26:07.320 --> 0:26:09.680
<v Speaker 1>really think you guys could give me some sound advice.

0:26:10.200 --> 0:26:13.000
<v Speaker 1>My friend started seeing someone new a few months ago,

0:26:13.160 --> 0:26:16.840
<v Speaker 1>and I really like them together. She had a tough

0:26:16.920 --> 0:26:20.280
<v Speaker 1>past with dating, so I'm really glad she's with someone

0:26:20.320 --> 0:26:24.160
<v Speaker 1>that's really kind and respectful. But I'm starting to worry

0:26:24.160 --> 0:26:27.760
<v Speaker 1>that she's about to ruin this relationship. Sorry if I'm

0:26:27.760 --> 0:26:31.760
<v Speaker 1>being too vague trying to stay anonymous. Basically, he'll do

0:26:31.840 --> 0:26:34.679
<v Speaker 1>things like forget to text her or we'll show up

0:26:34.720 --> 0:26:38.960
<v Speaker 1>to parties late, all because he has a really stressful job.

0:26:39.480 --> 0:26:41.920
<v Speaker 1>Even though she's able to talk herself out of assuming

0:26:41.960 --> 0:26:46.359
<v Speaker 1>the worst like cheating, she still gets really upset because

0:26:46.359 --> 0:26:49.080
<v Speaker 1>it brings her back to when her exes were cheating,

0:26:49.320 --> 0:26:52.480
<v Speaker 1>but blame things on work. I want to give her advice,

0:26:52.560 --> 0:26:55.520
<v Speaker 1>but here's my question, since it's so early on in

0:26:55.560 --> 0:26:58.760
<v Speaker 1>their relationship, is it worth me telling her to work

0:26:58.800 --> 0:27:03.239
<v Speaker 1>on it or is this just a circumstantial incompatibility. She

0:27:03.480 --> 0:27:06.800
<v Speaker 1>definitely still needs to heal, but she's working so hard

0:27:06.840 --> 0:27:09.200
<v Speaker 1>at it and her emotions just need to catch up.

0:27:09.720 --> 0:27:12.280
<v Speaker 1>She really likes him, but his job won't stop being

0:27:12.320 --> 0:27:17.560
<v Speaker 1>demanding anytime soon. He's in finance, so it's honestly, she

0:27:17.720 --> 0:27:20.080
<v Speaker 1>either learns to deal with it or she deals with

0:27:20.119 --> 0:27:23.399
<v Speaker 1>these feelings single. What do you think makes more sense?

0:27:23.880 --> 0:27:27.480
<v Speaker 1>He's patient and understanding, but I know it adds stress

0:27:27.520 --> 0:27:29.959
<v Speaker 1>to his plate as well when he gets tied up

0:27:29.960 --> 0:27:34.200
<v Speaker 1>at work and can't immediately communicate with her. Oh boy,

0:27:34.240 --> 0:27:34.879
<v Speaker 1>that's a lot.

0:27:35.240 --> 0:27:38.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Well, I think if you really love your girlfriend,

0:27:38.560 --> 0:27:42.639
<v Speaker 2>you pull her aside and tell her exactly what you

0:27:42.720 --> 0:27:45.159
<v Speaker 2>see that she's doing and she needs to get some

0:27:45.320 --> 0:27:48.560
<v Speaker 2>help by herself not share it with him, because she

0:27:48.680 --> 0:27:53.879
<v Speaker 2>could very well ruin this relationship and she's hurting herself

0:27:54.040 --> 0:27:56.639
<v Speaker 2>because I get not trusting and you got to be

0:27:56.720 --> 0:28:00.199
<v Speaker 2>careful and all that. You got to take chances in life,

0:28:00.200 --> 0:28:02.359
<v Speaker 2>and you don't want to be the one to blow

0:28:02.400 --> 0:28:06.439
<v Speaker 2>it because you had a pass that somebody did wrong

0:28:06.800 --> 0:28:09.879
<v Speaker 2>to you. That doesn't mean this man's going to do wrong.

0:28:09.960 --> 0:28:12.199
<v Speaker 2>So I would go see a therapist or talk to

0:28:12.240 --> 0:28:15.160
<v Speaker 2>your girlfriends or whatever you need to do.

0:28:15.359 --> 0:28:18.520
<v Speaker 1>And well, this is her, Susan, this is her friend.

0:28:18.200 --> 0:28:21.320
<v Speaker 2>That's going to but I want her to tell her thish, gotcha.

0:28:21.359 --> 0:28:25.959
<v Speaker 1>So I think that's really sound advice. I totally agree.

0:28:26.080 --> 0:28:29.960
<v Speaker 1>I think though that Anonymous, you have to be careful.

0:28:29.960 --> 0:28:34.640
<v Speaker 1>It's a fine line between inserting your will and your

0:28:34.800 --> 0:28:38.360
<v Speaker 1>ideas on what you think she should be doing and

0:28:38.480 --> 0:28:42.400
<v Speaker 1>making suggestions of you know, I was looking at your

0:28:42.440 --> 0:28:44.360
<v Speaker 1>da da da, and I think, why don't you think

0:28:44.400 --> 0:28:46.720
<v Speaker 1>about this, think about that. You have to be careful,

0:28:47.200 --> 0:28:50.920
<v Speaker 1>not to be too judgy, and not too pushy if

0:28:50.960 --> 0:28:53.120
<v Speaker 1>you will, about what you want to do. But I

0:28:53.120 --> 0:28:55.960
<v Speaker 1>think your heart is absolutely in the right place, and

0:28:56.280 --> 0:29:00.520
<v Speaker 1>I agree with Susan, she needs to go on, that's

0:29:00.560 --> 0:29:03.160
<v Speaker 1>your girlfriend. Yeah, and she does need to learn how

0:29:03.160 --> 0:29:06.160
<v Speaker 1>to trust. And I agree with Susan, she probably needs

0:29:06.480 --> 0:29:09.440
<v Speaker 1>some therapy, some professional help to do that, because you

0:29:09.480 --> 0:29:14.360
<v Speaker 1>know what, a relationship without trust is going absolutely nowherewhere

0:29:14.760 --> 0:29:16.560
<v Speaker 1>and you're smart a relationship.

0:29:16.680 --> 0:29:19.360
<v Speaker 2>Yes, thanks for writing into us, and we wish your

0:29:19.360 --> 0:29:20.360
<v Speaker 2>girlfriend lots of lots.

0:29:20.880 --> 0:29:23.200
<v Speaker 1>Let us know. Hopefully she'll get the help she needs.

0:29:23.360 --> 0:29:25.320
<v Speaker 2>Oh no, Kathy, do you see what's noting?

0:29:25.400 --> 0:29:29.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm so excited. Everybody do it. We are going to

0:29:29.840 --> 0:29:35.200
<v Speaker 1>play Kathy's favorite game and Susan's least favorite game. It's

0:29:35.200 --> 0:29:39.680
<v Speaker 1>called moral Quandary. We set it up where one of

0:29:39.760 --> 0:29:42.200
<v Speaker 1>us reads a prompt and then we have to guess

0:29:42.280 --> 0:29:45.880
<v Speaker 1>what the other one would do. Susan loves to say

0:29:45.880 --> 0:29:49.280
<v Speaker 1>what she would do, so I'm going to remind her

0:29:49.480 --> 0:29:53.640
<v Speaker 1>once again. You're going to guess what I would do.

0:29:54.200 --> 0:29:57.560
<v Speaker 1>So I'm going to start us off and you are

0:29:57.640 --> 0:30:01.000
<v Speaker 1>going to guess what I I would say or do.

0:30:02.040 --> 0:30:05.720
<v Speaker 1>Two of your friends are getting married. On the day

0:30:05.760 --> 0:30:10.680
<v Speaker 1>of the wedding, the groom goes m Ia for hours,

0:30:11.360 --> 0:30:14.920
<v Speaker 1>but after a lot of talking inventing, his nerves calm

0:30:15.000 --> 0:30:20.280
<v Speaker 1>down and he returns before the ceremony begins, the bride

0:30:20.360 --> 0:30:24.320
<v Speaker 1>is clueless the entire time and asks you why you

0:30:24.400 --> 0:30:27.880
<v Speaker 1>seem so stressed out? Do you ever tell her about

0:30:27.920 --> 0:30:31.360
<v Speaker 1>this or keep it a secret? What would I do?

0:30:31.560 --> 0:30:34.560
<v Speaker 2>Susan, You wouldn't say anything.

0:30:35.960 --> 0:30:36.240
<v Speaker 1>Ever.

0:30:38.040 --> 0:30:40.160
<v Speaker 2>They're not asking me ever. They're asking me the day

0:30:40.160 --> 0:30:40.719
<v Speaker 2>of the wedding.

0:30:40.880 --> 0:30:45.120
<v Speaker 1>No, it says, do you ever tell her about this?

0:30:45.280 --> 0:30:50.840
<v Speaker 1>Or do I keep it a secret? Do you think

0:30:50.880 --> 0:30:54.560
<v Speaker 1>I might tell her? Or you don't think I ever would?

0:30:55.480 --> 0:30:57.440
<v Speaker 2>No? I don't think she needs to know that.

0:30:57.960 --> 0:31:01.120
<v Speaker 1>You know what I would do probably sit what's the

0:31:01.160 --> 0:31:04.240
<v Speaker 1>movie where the girl's in love with the same guy

0:31:04.360 --> 0:31:08.920
<v Speaker 1>and and she runs away to the bus station. I'd

0:31:08.920 --> 0:31:11.200
<v Speaker 1>probably take my friend and sit down and watch that

0:31:11.240 --> 0:31:13.880
<v Speaker 1>movie and see what a reaction was. Then I would

0:31:13.920 --> 0:31:15.560
<v Speaker 1>decide if I was gonna tell her?

0:31:16.400 --> 0:31:19.440
<v Speaker 2>What about me? You don't answer that one yet.

0:31:19.560 --> 0:31:22.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna no I am. I'm going to say I.

0:31:22.920 --> 0:31:26.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't think you would tell her. I think you

0:31:26.280 --> 0:31:29.000
<v Speaker 1>would let it lie. Yeah, I think you already said that.

0:31:29.000 --> 0:31:30.760
<v Speaker 2>I don't think good could come out of that.

0:31:31.160 --> 0:31:34.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I mean they're already married. That's just going to

0:31:34.240 --> 0:31:37.440
<v Speaker 1>stress up for the wedding. Yeah, he's there. I mean,

0:31:37.480 --> 0:31:38.160
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure.

0:31:38.040 --> 0:31:40.080
<v Speaker 2>She's gonna hear it, like, oh my god, he wasn't

0:31:40.120 --> 0:31:42.040
<v Speaker 2>he was late, and then she's going to ask him.

0:31:42.080 --> 0:31:42.960
<v Speaker 2>It's just going to start.

0:31:43.200 --> 0:31:46.040
<v Speaker 1>But here's the thing. Would it have changed it, would

0:31:46.120 --> 0:31:48.720
<v Speaker 1>she not have married him? So you know what I'm saying.

0:31:48.720 --> 0:31:52.080
<v Speaker 1>They're already married. So uh, you know, like I said,

0:31:52.280 --> 0:31:54.920
<v Speaker 1>I would take a humorous approach, and humorous approach and

0:31:58.720 --> 0:31:59.240
<v Speaker 1>all right, all right.

0:31:59.400 --> 0:32:01.520
<v Speaker 2>The next one, you get out of your car after

0:32:01.680 --> 0:32:04.240
<v Speaker 2>arriving at work, and as you walk to your office,

0:32:04.320 --> 0:32:06.960
<v Speaker 2>you see someone pull out of a parking spot and

0:32:07.120 --> 0:32:11.360
<v Speaker 2>hit a parked car, leaving a huge debt. Before speeding off,

0:32:11.440 --> 0:32:14.960
<v Speaker 2>the driver makes eye contact with you and shrugs. You

0:32:15.120 --> 0:32:18.960
<v Speaker 2>then notice they're leaving a reserved parking spot with their

0:32:19.040 --> 0:32:24.160
<v Speaker 2>name on it. You discover it's your boss's boss. There's

0:32:24.240 --> 0:32:27.320
<v Speaker 2>no cameras, and you have no idea who the damaged

0:32:27.360 --> 0:32:28.200
<v Speaker 2>car belongs to.

0:32:28.800 --> 0:32:38.720
<v Speaker 1>What do you do? I think you would probably write

0:32:38.760 --> 0:32:41.440
<v Speaker 1>down the license number and put it on their windshield,

0:32:42.760 --> 0:32:44.000
<v Speaker 1>but not put your name on it.

0:32:48.080 --> 0:32:49.520
<v Speaker 2>I'd have to tell somebody.

0:32:49.680 --> 0:32:57.160
<v Speaker 1>But the question is you wait, we haven't. Don't guess

0:32:57.160 --> 0:32:59.640
<v Speaker 1>about me yet? Finish with you? I gave you. I

0:33:00.040 --> 0:33:02.840
<v Speaker 1>So you're saying you would not let the person know.

0:33:06.040 --> 0:33:07.680
<v Speaker 2>No, I would, but indiscreetly.

0:33:08.280 --> 0:33:11.080
<v Speaker 1>Well, how are you gonna let him know? Indiscreetly?

0:33:11.400 --> 0:33:13.040
<v Speaker 2>I'd tell somebody else that would tell.

0:33:13.680 --> 0:33:16.240
<v Speaker 1>Oh, so you'd pass the buck? What what do you

0:33:16.280 --> 0:33:16.880
<v Speaker 1>think I would do.

0:33:18.560 --> 0:33:21.040
<v Speaker 2>What you said, take the license plate and leave it.

0:33:21.080 --> 0:33:24.200
<v Speaker 1>On the I want to believe I would do that.

0:33:25.280 --> 0:33:26.760
<v Speaker 2>I would probably even think of that.

0:33:27.240 --> 0:33:31.880
<v Speaker 1>It's but when you know it's your boss's boss. Yeah,

0:33:32.520 --> 0:33:35.560
<v Speaker 1>I you know. I want to believe that I am

0:33:35.640 --> 0:33:38.760
<v Speaker 1>ethical and that I would just write the license number

0:33:38.880 --> 0:33:42.240
<v Speaker 1>down and leave it at that. Yeah, all right, let's

0:33:42.280 --> 0:33:48.160
<v Speaker 1>do the next one. You meet a really great guy

0:33:48.440 --> 0:33:50.440
<v Speaker 1>and begin dating. Oh. I like to start of this,

0:33:50.880 --> 0:33:54.280
<v Speaker 1>don't you. You quickly learned that he is a widower

0:33:54.520 --> 0:33:58.280
<v Speaker 1>and has two children in their twenties. After almost eight months,

0:33:58.320 --> 0:34:02.520
<v Speaker 1>you realize his kids have no idea you exist. You

0:34:02.720 --> 0:34:05.600
<v Speaker 1>talk about it with your boyfriend, and he reveals that

0:34:05.720 --> 0:34:09.920
<v Speaker 1>his last relationship ended because she wasn't kind to his kids,

0:34:10.320 --> 0:34:12.680
<v Speaker 1>and his relationship with his kids took a hard hit

0:34:12.760 --> 0:34:15.720
<v Speaker 1>from it. He says he'll tell them about you quote

0:34:16.040 --> 0:34:17.680
<v Speaker 1>when he's ready unquote.

0:34:17.880 --> 0:34:21.239
<v Speaker 2>How do you proceed eight months. I would have dealt

0:34:21.280 --> 0:34:23.200
<v Speaker 2>with that. Oh what would you do?

0:34:23.600 --> 0:34:27.520
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, Susan, I caught myself.

0:34:27.800 --> 0:34:29.680
<v Speaker 2>You didn't even catch it. I did see that.

0:34:29.840 --> 0:34:31.560
<v Speaker 1>Oh no I did. I was waiting for you to

0:34:31.640 --> 0:34:34.160
<v Speaker 1>do it. You go ahead, What would I do?

0:34:36.120 --> 0:34:38.600
<v Speaker 2>You would have a conversation about it. You would say,

0:34:39.719 --> 0:34:42.359
<v Speaker 2>it's been eight months. I would think he would meet

0:34:42.400 --> 0:34:45.440
<v Speaker 2>the children be probably by six months.

0:34:46.560 --> 0:34:50.080
<v Speaker 1>So this actually happened to me with the guy I

0:34:50.200 --> 0:34:54.640
<v Speaker 1>did and you know who we're talking about, and he

0:34:55.160 --> 0:34:57.840
<v Speaker 1>was exactly the opposite. He wanted me to meet his

0:34:57.960 --> 0:35:01.279
<v Speaker 1>kids right away, and I was like, nope, nope. I

0:35:01.400 --> 0:35:04.880
<v Speaker 1>think in this case, knowing me and the kind of

0:35:04.960 --> 0:35:09.359
<v Speaker 1>person I am, I would have already if it were

0:35:09.440 --> 0:35:12.279
<v Speaker 1>if this relationship were going anywhere, I'd have already met

0:35:12.320 --> 0:35:14.719
<v Speaker 1>his kids before it once. And I think that's exactly

0:35:14.800 --> 0:35:16.680
<v Speaker 1>what you would do. You would have already met the

0:35:16.760 --> 0:35:19.200
<v Speaker 1>kids or that's right, definitely.

0:35:19.840 --> 0:35:23.200
<v Speaker 2>Okay. You're hosting a brunch at your house with homemade

0:35:23.239 --> 0:35:28.320
<v Speaker 2>bloody Mary's. Someone accidentally spilled a ton of the bloody

0:35:28.360 --> 0:35:32.160
<v Speaker 2>mary mix, so you're very low on the most popular

0:35:32.320 --> 0:35:35.520
<v Speaker 2>drink at the party. You bring one over to a

0:35:35.680 --> 0:35:40.440
<v Speaker 2>guest of yours that you didn't realize was vegetarian, and

0:35:40.600 --> 0:35:43.880
<v Speaker 2>there's bacon on the garnish. After taking a sip, they

0:35:44.000 --> 0:35:47.120
<v Speaker 2>apologize and ask if they could have a brand new

0:35:47.239 --> 0:35:52.520
<v Speaker 2>one without the bacon. With little despair, a friend recommends

0:35:52.719 --> 0:35:55.359
<v Speaker 2>just taking the bacon out and giving it back to them.

0:35:55.440 --> 0:35:59.320
<v Speaker 1>What do you do? What you would do? Yeah? You

0:35:59.520 --> 0:36:02.799
<v Speaker 1>take them give it right back to him. Am I right?

0:36:03.000 --> 0:36:03.600
<v Speaker 1>What would I do?

0:36:04.040 --> 0:36:06.160
<v Speaker 2>You don't have to have the bacon? Well, what you

0:36:06.200 --> 0:36:08.640
<v Speaker 2>would say? I have none left? I'll take the bacon out.

0:36:09.040 --> 0:36:11.600
<v Speaker 1>No, I would say, if there's enough for another drink?

0:36:11.960 --> 0:36:14.360
<v Speaker 1>I would say, who wants this drink with the bacon?

0:36:14.440 --> 0:36:16.440
<v Speaker 1>And I got to make one without the bacon right now?

0:36:16.560 --> 0:36:21.520
<v Speaker 1>That's also no brighter? Like you know all right? You're

0:36:21.640 --> 0:36:25.719
<v Speaker 1>redecorating your home. When a friend with a very successful

0:36:26.040 --> 0:36:30.439
<v Speaker 1>handmade furniture business offered to make you a custom coffee table,

0:36:30.840 --> 0:36:34.400
<v Speaker 1>you only declined due to the price, despite getting a

0:36:34.480 --> 0:36:38.879
<v Speaker 1>hefty discount, and your friend completely understood. Later that week,

0:36:39.160 --> 0:36:41.920
<v Speaker 1>you passed by a big competitor of your friend's business

0:36:42.239 --> 0:36:44.480
<v Speaker 1>and fell in love with the coffee table in the window.

0:36:44.840 --> 0:36:47.719
<v Speaker 1>Priced a little higher than your friend's offer. You really

0:36:47.800 --> 0:36:50.160
<v Speaker 1>want to buy it, but you worry your friend will

0:36:50.200 --> 0:36:52.320
<v Speaker 1>ask about it the next time they are over. What

0:36:52.440 --> 0:36:56.160
<v Speaker 1>do you do? Susan buys the coffee table and says,

0:36:56.600 --> 0:36:57.960
<v Speaker 1>stuff it if you don't like it.

0:36:58.719 --> 0:37:01.680
<v Speaker 2>I wouldn't say that, but I would buy the one

0:37:01.719 --> 0:37:02.080
<v Speaker 2>I wanted.

0:37:02.360 --> 0:37:05.080
<v Speaker 1>Of course you would. What would I do? So we

0:37:05.200 --> 0:37:10.880
<v Speaker 1>do absolutely absolutely, And you know what people need to

0:37:11.120 --> 0:37:15.840
<v Speaker 1>learn that your friend's business. You wish them well. You

0:37:16.040 --> 0:37:19.160
<v Speaker 1>hope that they, you know, make a great business and

0:37:19.239 --> 0:37:21.360
<v Speaker 1>sell lots of furniture. That doesn't mean you have to

0:37:21.440 --> 0:37:22.320
<v Speaker 1>buy their furniture.

0:37:23.760 --> 0:37:26.719
<v Speaker 2>It doesn't. It doesn't. And I probably like feel odd

0:37:26.960 --> 0:37:31.520
<v Speaker 2>when they came over, But why because I didn't buy

0:37:31.520 --> 0:37:31.960
<v Speaker 2>it from them.

0:37:32.640 --> 0:37:36.759
<v Speaker 1>It's a different coffee table. It's a different coffee table.

0:37:36.960 --> 0:37:39.880
<v Speaker 1>It is it is anyway, that's a new brainer too.

0:37:39.920 --> 0:37:43.680
<v Speaker 1>They were easy ones today. I passed everybody out there.

0:37:43.800 --> 0:37:47.400
<v Speaker 1>You hear that, Susan, You are really you are marketing

0:37:47.400 --> 0:37:50.000
<v Speaker 1>it up here. I am impressed. And that is going

0:37:50.080 --> 0:37:51.440
<v Speaker 1>to do it. We're going to end it on that

0:37:51.560 --> 0:37:56.480
<v Speaker 1>happy note, Susan. That ends this episode of Bachelor Happy

0:37:56.560 --> 0:38:00.040
<v Speaker 1>Hours Golden Hour. Thanks so much for joining us.

0:38:00.440 --> 0:38:02.840
<v Speaker 2>Hey guys, and make sure to submit your questions to

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<v Speaker 2>us at bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour. We really

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<v Speaker 2>love getting to connect with you guys, listening to what's

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<v Speaker 2>them coming, and if you ever disagree with us, we

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<v Speaker 2>want to know that as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, leave us a review, ask us questions, and also

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<v Speaker 1>follow up if we've answered one of your questions. We

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<v Speaker 1>really want to know how your life is going. In

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<v Speaker 1>the meantime, listen to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on

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<v Speaker 1>a great week, See you next time.