Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. The
Speaker 1: reason Trump's team of idiot rivals messaged each other their
Speaker 1: war plans on might as well have been AOL Instant
Speaker 1: Messenger or Yahoo Pager or I Kremlin. The reason wasn't
Speaker 1: to keep these communications secret from the Senate or from
Speaker 1: future investigations or from the Democrats. It was to keep
Speaker 1: them secret from Trump. They no longer trust Trump, they
Speaker 1: no longer think Trump understands what's going on. There was
Speaker 1: a work around around Trump. They are cutting Trump out.
Speaker 1: That is the only and the inescapable conclusion to all this. Also,
Speaker 1: they can all be charged with espionage under eighteen US
Speaker 1: Code seventy nine to three gathering, transmitting or losing defense
Speaker 1: information Paragraph F. I'll circle back to this, And if
Speaker 1: you miss this, a German newspaper found live mobile numbers
Speaker 1: and email addresses for Waltz and Gabbard and Hegseth. I'll
Speaker 1: circle back to that. Also, Waltz and Gabbert and Hegseth
Speaker 1: are three of the biggest idiots in the history of
Speaker 1: this country, but paramount and completely ignored so far near
Speaker 1: as I can tell. The real lesson of the Yeah man,
Speaker 1: it's Yemen Emoji party is they are cutting Trump out.
Speaker 1: Either he is as exactly bonkers as we've all thought
Speaker 1: he was getting, or they've all decided the only part
Speaker 1: of the job he's putting any effort into anymore is
Speaker 1: the blah blah blah speech part. And they are convening
Speaker 1: on signal, which might as well be an app you
Speaker 1: get free with the purchase of a lot of porn,
Speaker 1: because there is no chance Trump has any idea how
Speaker 1: it works, just as when asked Monday, he had no
Speaker 1: idea what the messaging scandal was, and he had no
Speaker 1: idea who Jeffrey Goldberg was, and he could barely remember
Speaker 1: what the Atlantic was long enough to take a really
Speaker 1: low energy dig at its circulation numbers. Trump is going potty,
Speaker 1: and his cabinet knows it. And before he tells them
Speaker 1: to go blow up Yemen, they are finding a place
Speaker 1: to meet without him to actually discuss blowing up Yemen.
Speaker 1: And I might add, nearly everybody on these texts that
Speaker 1: we've seen except Hegseth discussed it kind of rationally, and
Speaker 1: I mean even Vance made sense until he started to
Speaker 1: talk jinguist isolationist nonsense with hegg Seth. I mean, read
Speaker 1: those texts. The bully boy in eyeliner, that's vance in public,
Speaker 1: threatening and swearing and blustering. The guy in the text
Speaker 1: seems to think about things. And I'm going to go
Speaker 1: out further on a limb and answer the most intriguing,
Speaker 1: most unaddressed question of this entire mess. Why in the
Speaker 1: hell would the name of the editor of The Atlantic
Speaker 1: pop up automatically in the auto composition in the phone
Speaker 1: of National Security Advisor Mike Waltz. I mean, huh, it's
Speaker 1: my name in there too. How about Jasmine Crocketts. Now
Speaker 1: there might be a reason a textbook, standard issue liberal
Speaker 1: Goldberg or people like Goldberg at least would be in
Speaker 1: Mike Waltz's phone, or whoever's phone Mike Waltz would have
Speaker 1: been using. Mike Waltz used to be a defense policy
Speaker 1: director for Rumsfeld at the Pentagon and Gates at the Pentagon,
Speaker 1: and Bob Gates was Secretary of Defense for three years
Speaker 1: under Obama. Bob Gates new liberal people, and Bob Gates
Speaker 1: used to actually ask liberals their opinions on defense stuff
Speaker 1: because the world was like that back then, in the
Speaker 1: old days. Even Rumsfeld did that occasionally. Jeffrey Goldberg's number
Speaker 1: may have been in Mike Waltz's phone, may have been
Speaker 1: used often enough that it popped up automatically in Mike
Speaker 1: Waltz's phone because he asked his opinion on something once,
Speaker 1: and that if you are Mike Waltz, is the last
Speaker 1: thing you want Trump or any of these psychopaths who
Speaker 1: work for Trump to know. Guess what. I'm not the
Speaker 1: first person to have noticed this, certainly not the last
Speaker 1: person to have noticed this. Even Politico noticed it in
Speaker 1: an aside yesterday. Trump's quote chief concern during multiple conversations
Speaker 1: with Waltz has been why his NSA would have Goldberg's
Speaker 1: number in the first place. Indeed, some corners of Maga
Speaker 1: world have been a wash with unevidenced theories that Waltz
Speaker 1: was already leaking to the Atlantic, which may explain Waltz's
Speaker 1: eager denials on Fox. Eager is the plight word for insane.
Speaker 1: This whole thing insecure as it is, illegal, as it is,
Speaker 1: moronic as it is folks need to be fired as
Speaker 1: it is is indeed about keeping everything off the books,
Speaker 1: off the books that Trump can see. By the way,
Speaker 1: there's a second critical point here that has been entirely overlooked.
Speaker 1: I've heard it hourly since Monday. Isn't it lucky? The
Speaker 1: Jeffrey Goldberg was the outsider on this chat and just
Speaker 1: him and nobody else. Well, who in the hell said
Speaker 1: that's true? How do we know Goldberg was the only
Speaker 1: person on there who shouldn't have been on there? How
Speaker 1: do we know his name didn't pop up when Mike
Speaker 1: Waltz hit the name of some other media figure. I
Speaker 1: don't know, Brit Hume or somebody our David Muir, I
Speaker 1: don't know. How do we know there weren't forty seven
Speaker 1: reporters on the chat? How do we know there weren't
Speaker 1: twenty two former national security advisors on the chat? How
Speaker 1: do we know who Waltz and these other clowns are
Speaker 1: running their plans pass to make sure Trump doesn't get
Speaker 1: out in front of them and order the bombing of
Speaker 1: Kansas City or something. The other issues here are all
Speaker 1: valid and intriguing, And as a story, boy, did they
Speaker 1: hit the cloud just right? We got seventy seven and
Speaker 1: a half inches of snow here. This story has twice
Speaker 1: as much engagement worldwide as any other news story this year.
Speaker 1: But the news news here is there is at least
Speaker 1: one ghost mechanism in place to allow Trump's cabinet members
Speaker 1: to try to get something done without destroying the world yet.
Speaker 1: And if that's the case, the point of this is
Speaker 1: you have a president whose own people think he is
Speaker 1: now a complete feb that he cannot function, that he
Speaker 1: cannot be trusted, that he cannot be trusted not to
Speaker 1: do something at least disastrously stupid if that thing requires
Speaker 1: him to do anything more than blather for forty minutes
Speaker 1: and more slow into glorious Wanson as Norma Desmond and
Speaker 1: Sunset Boulevard. We need a whole new president like later today.
Speaker 1: The one we have now is nuts, positively definitely nuts,
Speaker 1: and his own people know it. I'm not defending any
Speaker 1: of them. I'm not defending what they did. None of
Speaker 1: these people are qualified for their jobs. None of them
Speaker 1: are really smart. None of them are honest. If they
Speaker 1: were honest, they probably wouldn't even try this. None of
Speaker 1: them are worth the oil with which to fry them
Speaker 1: to hell. But this, surprisingly enough, is not a Trump
Speaker 1: plan to keep reality from America. This is an American
Speaker 1: plan to keep reality from Trump. And here comes the
Speaker 1: espionage eighteen US Code seventy nine three, and a preface
Speaker 1: that to be guilty of espionage, you have to be
Speaker 1: charged with espionage, and the person who would charge the
Speaker 1: other people on the list with espionage is probably the
Speaker 1: most subservient of Trump's slaves, his attorney general. Still it's there,
Speaker 1: and the statute of limitations is ten years, So hey
Speaker 1: you nineteen lawyer up eighteen US Code seventy nine three. Gathering, transmitting,
Speaker 1: or losing defense information. And as I seem to recall
Speaker 1: having mentioned three years ago, it does not have to
Speaker 1: be classified information. Another red herring. It only has to
Speaker 1: be defense information that's in the code. Transmitting or losing
Speaker 1: defense information. Whoever being entrusted with or having lawful possession
Speaker 1: or control of any document, writing, code, book, signal, book, sketch, photograph, photographic, negative, blueprint, plan, map, model, instrument, appliance, note,
Speaker 1: or information relating to the national defense one, through gross negligence,
Speaker 1: permits the same to be removed from its proper place
Speaker 1: of custody or delivered to anyone in violation of his trust,
Speaker 1: or to be lost, stolen, abstracted, or destroyed, or two
Speaker 1: having knowledge that the same has been illegally removed from
Speaker 1: its proper place of custody, or delivered to anyone in
Speaker 1: violation of its trust, or lost or stolen, abstracted, or destroyed,
Speaker 1: and fails to make prompt report of such loss, theft, abstraction,
Speaker 1: or destruction to his superior officer shall be fined under
Speaker 1: this title or imprisoned not more than ten years, or both.
Speaker 1: Since Pam Bondy isn't going to charge them today, and
Speaker 1: even if she did, she could probably still find a
Speaker 1: way to get the case in front of Eileen, nobody
Speaker 1: gets convicted on my watch, Cannon. The real worry for
Speaker 1: people like Mike Waltz, is Trump still being interested in
Speaker 1: this story later today. The longer they all go without
Speaker 1: letting him get distracted by something, and I'm betting Stephen
Speaker 1: Miller is willing to tell him he needs to invade
Speaker 1: Australia today, the longer Trump's compulsion to make somebody else
Speaker 1: hurt builds up. The panic in Waltz's decreasingly coherent explanations
Speaker 1: for how Jeffrey Goldberg's name got in his effing phone
Speaker 1: book is obvious he is at the stage where he
Speaker 1: first suggested it was an accident. Then it was an
Speaker 1: aids doing. Maybe then that thing that happens when you
Speaker 1: enter somebody's name but somebody else's number, which sounds great
Speaker 1: until you remember that never happens. Then the thing where
Speaker 1: the mystery phone name gets quote sucked into your phone unquote.
Speaker 1: Mike Waltz is about an hour away from claiming Jesus
Speaker 1: put it there. Why also, would Goldberg have done this?
Speaker 1: The idea that he has somehow done something wrong here
Speaker 1: or in fact done something is madness. Why would he
Speaker 1: scheme his way onto this signal group and then publish
Speaker 1: what he found there, thus incriminating himself, but not publish
Speaker 1: all of it and in fact leave the good stuff
Speaker 1: out at first? What does it say that Waltz and
Speaker 1: heg Seth and the rest of them, He implicates, all
Speaker 1: of them would be stupid enough to use a public
Speaker 1: message app that Jeffrey Goldberg could hack his way into.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's that easy, and it's his fault that
Speaker 1: you picked it. Even if he did hack his way
Speaker 1: in somehow, or he sweet talked his way, what do
Speaker 1: you do? Did he sweet talk Christy Noom like all
Speaker 1: the other boys do. Achham's Razor explains that Goldberg was
Speaker 1: in Waltz's phone because Waltz put him there. So let's
Speaker 1: go to the phones and I mean that, would you
Speaker 1: like some of Waltz's old phones. Der Spiegel can get
Speaker 1: them for you. It's a complicated story. It does not
Speaker 1: translate well from the original German. What does. But the
Speaker 1: gist is their staffers at this German news magazine we're
Speaker 1: able to beg borrow and steal live active phone numbers
Speaker 1: and emails for all of these trumpest clowns, including the
Speaker 1: Big three of Defense. I'll just read the first two
Speaker 1: and a half grafts. You'll get the idea. Private contact
Speaker 1: details of the most important security advisors to US President
Speaker 1: Donald Trump can be found on the internet. Der Spiegel
Speaker 1: reports reporters, forgive me, we're able to find mobile phone numbers,
Speaker 1: email addresses and even some passwords belonging to the top officials.
Speaker 1: To do so, the reporters used commercial people search engines
Speaker 1: along with hacked customer data that has been published on
Speaker 1: the web. Those affected by the leaks include National Security
Speaker 1: Advisor Mike Waltz, Director of National Intelligence Tulsey Gabbard, and
Speaker 1: Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth. Scoll. Most of these numbers
Speaker 1: and email addresses are apparently still in use, with some
Speaker 1: of them linked to profiles on social media platforms like
Speaker 1: Instagram and LinkedIn unquote terrific one more detail quote. National
Speaker 1: Intelligence Director Gabbard was seemingly more careful with her data
Speaker 1: than her two male colleagues. She apparently had her own
Speaker 1: data blocked in the commercial contact search engines that contained
Speaker 1: the data of Hegseth and Waltz, but her email address
Speaker 1: was to be found on WikiLeaks and Reddit. Gabbard's email
Speaker 1: address is available in more than ten leaks. One of
Speaker 1: those also contains a partial telephone number, which when completed,
Speaker 1: leads to an active WhatsApp account and a signal profile.
Speaker 1: A signal profile they found a tulsy Gabbard's signal profile.
Speaker 1: Well done, Dirshpiegel. Just when you think human speech has
Speaker 1: become advanced enough to describe how dumb Tulsi Gabbard is
Speaker 1: the DNI, the Director of National Intelligence, as a signal
Speaker 1: profile connected to a phone number that is available on
Speaker 1: the Internet. Well, let me correct that DNI, National Intelligence
Speaker 1: Director of no Intelligence, doesn't know who has her phone,
Speaker 1: doesn't know where she was, doesn't know where anybody is
Speaker 1: the time.
Speaker 2: Mister Whitkoff was actually in Russia during this chat discussion?
Speaker 1: Was he not?
Speaker 2: I was not aware of that. Was he on his
Speaker 2: personal phone at the time. I don't know what's my
Speaker 2: understanding that he was indeed in Russia? Director Dabberd, You
Speaker 2: were also traveling during this discussion? Correct?
Speaker 1: Yes? And where were you?
Speaker 2: I was traveling through the Asia Pacific region. I don't
Speaker 2: recall which country I was in at that time. You
Speaker 2: don't remember the country.
Speaker 1: I'd have to go back and look at the schedule. Okay,
Speaker 1: how about now, Telsey, do you know what country you
Speaker 1: were in? Now? And for ten points? So you can
Speaker 1: move on to the lightning round? Is it Hawaii or Hawaii?
Speaker 1: Thank you? You're welcome. Okay. So why else should nineteen
Speaker 1: Trump appointees be fired or prosecuted or both? Well, I
Speaker 1: only have nineteen reasons so far, but I've been busy.
Speaker 1: You heard the first three, the phones and the espionage,
Speaker 1: and what a dope Gabbard is the others. Four signal
Speaker 1: is a way to have off the books conversations. The
Speaker 1: conversations can self erase at a week and can be
Speaker 1: adjusted in Project twenty twenty five, like you needed something
Speaker 1: else hanging off this gigantic story. In Project twenty twive,
Speaker 1: it says, use signal for these communications, so there are
Speaker 1: no records. Good idea worked out well so far for you.
Speaker 1: Number five, But the National Security Agency put out a
Speaker 1: memo last month specifically saying, do not use signal. It's vulnerable.
Speaker 1: Why do you think it's vulnerable because all of your
Speaker 1: accounts are in the files of Der Spiegel. Six. This chat,
Speaker 1: this edition of Signal Gate, came after that warning, and
Speaker 1: in it there's a reference to a previous signal chat.
Speaker 1: So America's alleged intelligence kingpin ignored their own advice about
Speaker 1: protecting intelligence. Seven. Trump's in house Russian Steve Whitcoff, was
Speaker 1: on the chat, reportedly at or near the Kremlin. Eight
Speaker 1: Here's something Senator Kelly noted. Department of Defense policy prohibits
Speaker 1: discussion of even controlled unclassified information on unsecured devices. He asked, Gabbard,
Speaker 1: are you aware of that? She said, looking very stern,
Speaker 1: I haven't read that policy. CIA Director Ratface. I'm sorry, Ratcliff,
Speaker 1: I'm not familiar with the DoD policy. Number nine. The
Speaker 1: White House says none of this was classified, meaning Goldberg
Speaker 1: of course could publish it, and then they accused Goldberg
Speaker 1: of publishing classified material. It's got to be one of
Speaker 1: the other kids. Ten Senator King targets, weapons, attack sequences,
Speaker 1: and timing were all discussed. Gabbard again says nothing's classified. Again,
Speaker 1: this is a red herring. It's like saying there's a
Speaker 1: difference between war plans and battle plans. You can go
Speaker 1: to prison for losing non classified plans. All it says
Speaker 1: is defense information. Right now, included among the things you
Speaker 1: could go to jail for for losing that his defense
Speaker 1: information would be Tulcy Gabbard's phone number. What are he
Speaker 1: in for, ma'am I lost my phone? How many years
Speaker 1: did you get? Nine point eleven? On Tuesday, Senator Warner
Speaker 1: hit another nail on the head, and the idea is
Speaker 1: somehow well, none of this was classified, but we can't
Speaker 1: talk about it here in the Senate. You can't have
Speaker 1: it both ways. When even Senator Warner has got you,
Speaker 1: you've been gott twelve. Ratcliffe now adds that signal has
Speaker 1: been deemed permissible for senior officials. Waltz, he said, sent
Speaker 1: a signal message to conduct coordination for this if that
Speaker 1: was Waltson, not somebody who owns what was Waltz's phone?
Speaker 1: In two thousand and two, number thirteen, the Press Secretary
Speaker 1: her moron lady, the center fielder answering for the president.
Speaker 1: She lied Caroline Levitt, no war plans were discussed. Gabbard
Speaker 1: testified that there was discussion around targets. So, okay, what's
Speaker 1: a war plan? What's a war? A war is something
Speaker 1: where you tried to target things, people, buildings, And the
Speaker 1: director of no Intelligence says there was a discussion around
Speaker 1: targets that would be war plans. Levitt said there were
Speaker 1: no war plans. Levitt light or perhaps she was just
Speaker 1: misinformed and is a moron. Fourteen Your CIA director rat
Speaker 1: face and by the way, he looks like Steve Carell
Speaker 1: an anchorman, doesn't he He says he can't recall if
Speaker 1: the timing of the strikes or if delaying a month
Speaker 1: was in the chat, even though that seems to have
Speaker 1: been the whole point of the chat. Fifteen The Defense
Speaker 1: Secretary didn't get the message initially that the White House
Speaker 1: had authenticated the chat, and he was continuing to pretend
Speaker 1: that it was all fabricated. You're talking about a deceitful
Speaker 1: and highly discredited so called journalist, he said, putting more
Speaker 1: brill cream in his hair, and they posted it. His
Speaker 1: office posted it online, to which brit Hume brit Hume,
Speaker 1: for crying out loud, answered Hegsith's you're talking about a deceitful,
Speaker 1: highly discredited so called journalist by writing, Oh, for God's sake,
Speaker 1: the administration has already confirmed the authenticity of the message.
Speaker 1: Sixteen They individually and as a group have now done
Speaker 1: everything they have ever accused Hillary Clinton of, except they've
Speaker 1: done it several times each in one week. Seventeen. The
Speaker 1: context of all this was the big show they made
Speaker 1: last week of Trump removing security clearances of the Bidens
Speaker 1: and everybody else he doesn't like because nominally they can't
Speaker 1: be trusted with secret information. Because we can't let the
Speaker 1: Bidens have secret information, we have to keep that for
Speaker 1: Tulsey Gabbard to give away. Eighteen Adam Kinsinger wrote, three
Speaker 1: days ago Trump took away my non existent security clearance
Speaker 1: at the same time as cabinet was texting up secret
Speaker 1: plans with a member of the media on board. Kind
Speaker 1: of sums it up. And nineteen the Danu Mont the
Speaker 1: final touch. Elon Musk is investigating what happened, meaning Elon Musk,
Speaker 1: and God knows how many more of his slave boys
Speaker 1: will be getting access to defense information they should not have.
Speaker 1: Once again, let me go way out on a limb here.
Speaker 1: Mike Waltz is an idiot. Jd Vance is an idiot,
Speaker 1: Pete Hegseth is an idiot, Marco Rubio idiot, Telsea Gabbard
Speaker 1: two idiots, John Ratcleff idiot who looks like Corell and Anchorman,
Speaker 1: Scott Bessant idiot, Susie Wils's idiot, Steve Whitcoff idiot, Stephen
Speaker 1: Miller idiot, Joe Kent idiot, Alex Wong idiot, Brian McCormick idiot,
Speaker 1: Walker Barrett idiot, Dan Katz idiot, Mike need Him idiot.
Speaker 1: Jacob last name unconfirmed, less of an idiot because at
Speaker 1: least he keepped his last name unconfirmed. Make him the
Speaker 1: new director of National Intelligence. Hey, Jacob, come over here,
Speaker 1: You're in charge now, For the one millionth time in
Speaker 1: this series alone, the democracy is preserved less by our
Speaker 1: exertions to save it than it is by the stupidity
Speaker 1: of those who seek to destroy it. The reason, as
Speaker 1: I know I noted before that I suspected something even
Speaker 1: more was going on behind the scenes is the texts
Speaker 1: made too much sense. Nearly as important as the fact
Speaker 1: that they sent them to Jeffrey Goldberg and not the
Speaker 1: wrestler known simply as Goldberg is the fact that a
Speaker 1: lot of the group chat here, which was not sent
Speaker 1: to Johann Goldberg, who performed the Bach Goldberg variations calmly
Speaker 1: and even dare I say, intelligently examines how dumb it
Speaker 1: was to bomb Yemen and be in such a hurry
Speaker 1: about it, and how little key players in that administration
Speaker 1: believe it was anything more than a publicity or strategy stunt.
Speaker 1: Roger Sollenberger the Daily Beast pointed this out first, and
Speaker 1: it was a smart find. Let me quote Goldberg, not
Speaker 1: the lead character in the old Jeff Garland sitcom v. Goldbergs.
Speaker 1: Let me quote Jeffrey Goldberg quoting what the morons sent him.
Speaker 1: At this point, a fascinating policy discussion commenced. The account
Speaker 1: labeled jd Vance responded at eight sixteen t I am
Speaker 1: out for the day doing an economic event in Michigan.
Speaker 1: But I think we are making a mistake Vance was
Speaker 1: indeed in Michigan that day. The Vance account goes on
Speaker 1: to state three percent of US trade runs through the Suez,
Speaker 1: forty percent of European trade does. There is a real
Speaker 1: risk that the public doesn't understand this or why it's necessary.
Speaker 1: The strongest reason to do this is, as Potus said,
Speaker 1: to send a message. The Vance account then goes on
Speaker 1: to make a noteworthy statement considering that the vice president
Speaker 1: has not deviated publicly from Trump's position on virtually any issue.
Speaker 1: I am not sure the president is aware. There's your
Speaker 1: tip off. I am not sure the president is aware
Speaker 1: how inconsistent this is with his message on Europe. Right now,
Speaker 1: there's a further risk that we see a moderate to
Speaker 1: severe spike in oil prices. I am willing to support
Speaker 1: the consensus of the team and keep these concerns to myself,
Speaker 1: but there is a strong argument for delaying this a month,
Speaker 1: doing the messaging work on why this matters, seeing where
Speaker 1: the economy is et CERG goes on a person identified
Speaker 1: in signal as Joe Kent. Trump's dominie to run the
Speaker 1: National counter Terrorism Center is named Joe Kent wrote at
Speaker 1: A twenty two there is nothing time sensitive driving the timeline,
Speaker 1: we'll having the exact same options in a month. At
Speaker 1: this point, the previously silent SM joined the conversation. Is
Speaker 1: he bald? Does he hate everybody? Is he sniveling? I
Speaker 1: think I know who SM is. As I heard it,
Speaker 1: the President was clear green light. But we soon make
Speaker 1: clear to Egypt and Europe what we expect in return.
Speaker 1: We also need to figure out how to enforce such
Speaker 1: a requirement. Eg. If Europe doesn't remunerate, then what if
Speaker 1: the US successfully restores freedom of navigation at great cost?
Speaker 1: There needs to be some further economic gain expected in
Speaker 1: return the disagreement. The relatively calm discussion about this being
Speaker 1: an unnecessary, rushed event underscore is something whoever is making
Speaker 1: the calls like hey, why do you say we go
Speaker 1: bomb Yemen? And just whoever is convincing Trump to do
Speaker 1: something like this was presumably not actually on that group chat,
Speaker 1: because to go back to the beginning, they had this
Speaker 1: chat on a public board at MySpace. I think so
Speaker 1: that Trump would not know and they could figure out
Speaker 1: how to keep him out of this because he's gone nuts.
Speaker 1: Also of interest here even more on this cataclysm, with
Speaker 1: the reminder that mishandling. Communications is apparently the first thing
Speaker 1: they ask you. If you are good at, we're bad
Speaker 1: at if you want to go into government. Hey see
Speaker 1: this pile of papers? Can you screw this up? The
Speaker 1: Bushies once spent a day failing to email me, and
Speaker 1: instead wound up revealing to me their secret roster of
Speaker 1: people they would go to at NBC whenever they needed
Speaker 1: a favor or to get the news slanted in Bush's favor.
Speaker 1: It's a history as old as time itself. And in
Speaker 1: unrelated news, Bill Maher is an idiot. No, I mean
Speaker 1: in a new way. That's next. This is Countdown. This
Speaker 1: is Countdown with Keith Olberman postscripts to the news, some headlines,
Speaker 1: some updates, some snarks, still ahead of course, worst persons,
Speaker 1: and the joy that is Bill Mahr going to the
Speaker 1: White House, because if anybody can smell a change in
Speaker 1: the wind, it's Bill Maher. I should have had that
Speaker 1: fifth fight with him in nineteen seventy eight. First, this
Speaker 1: is the Countdown podcast, and these are the places where
Speaker 1: there's news. Eight line the White House aka the Ship
Speaker 1: of Fools. I was going to do a bulletin for
Speaker 1: you Monday night about Trump's College of rival morons, led
Speaker 1: by National Security Advisor Waltz, sending via a messaging app
Speaker 1: their plans to bomb hoosey rebels in Yemen to two
Speaker 1: Cabinet secretaries, two intelligent directors, the White House Chief of Staff,
Speaker 1: the Deputy White House Chief of Staff, the Middle East
Speaker 1: Special Envoy, the Counter Terrorism Center Director, the Vice president,
Speaker 1: the editor of The Atlantic, several Major League Baseball players,
Speaker 1: and of course a dead letterbox in Antarctica because his
Speaker 1: name apparently popped up Autumnmatically, when Waltz typed in the
Speaker 1: initials JG, they say now for Jamison Greer Instead, it
Speaker 1: turned out to be Jeffrey Goldberg's easiest explanation is, as
Speaker 1: I suggested earlier, that's right, Mike Waltz knows Jeffrey Goldberg
Speaker 1: and may have already leaked to him. I guess we
Speaker 1: should just be happy the autocorrect typed in a milk
Speaker 1: toast boringly responsible mild liberal like Jeffrey Goldberg instead of say,
Speaker 1: whoopee Goldberg or Rube Goldberg. But of course that was Monday,
Speaker 1: and it was widely enough covered that you didn't need
Speaker 1: a gratuitous, obvious, immediate update from me. The Radiance of
Speaker 1: the Trump administration's stupidity and culpability, and as I noted earlier,
Speaker 1: the dawning realization that Trump is not making the decisions
Speaker 1: here anymore. The messages are on signal or WhatsApp or
Speaker 1: telegram or I Kremlin or wherever, so they can keep
Speaker 1: them from Trump. This gigantic shit show shined magnificently on
Speaker 1: its own with no added help from me for three days. However,
Speaker 1: I can add a little background to this, a little history,
Speaker 1: like one hundred and sixty three years worth. Hillary Clinton
Speaker 1: may turn out to have been the former governmental figure
Speaker 1: the most skilled at keeping confidential communications confidential. Seriously, Put
Speaker 1: an email in front of an administration staffer, any administration,
Speaker 1: any century, and they would screw it up. Put a
Speaker 1: phone call in front of an administration staffer, and they
Speaker 1: would screw it up. Put literally a handwritten note in
Speaker 1: front of an administration staffer, and they did screw it up.
Speaker 1: Nixon's phone calls were all recorded for about five years,
Speaker 1: and only one or two low level members of his
Speaker 1: staff even suspected anything until John Dene figured it out.
Speaker 1: Hell Robert E. Lee's special Order Numbnumber one nine one
Speaker 1: from September ninth, eighteen sixty two, detailed the South's invasion
Speaker 1: of Maryland, except somebody he gave it to dropped it.
Speaker 1: Dropped it on a campground at Frederick, Maryland, and a
Speaker 1: Northern corporal found it on the ground four days later,
Speaker 1: and suddenly the North had general These invasion plans at
Speaker 1: the opposite end of the importance spectrum, but with the
Speaker 1: same degree of utter incompetence and stupidity. I have my
Speaker 1: own personal experience I'd like to share with you about
Speaker 1: this topic about a president's trusted aids, about the fact
Speaker 1: that none of them could type the proverbial Shakespearean tome
Speaker 1: if they had five thousand monkeys with them and typewriters.
Speaker 1: Unlike Trump's, who couldn't keep his secrets secret, George Bush's
Speaker 1: trusted aids literally could not help but keep them secret.
Speaker 1: They could not manage to successfully send an email to me.
Speaker 1: It took them hours, perhaps days, to figure out how
Speaker 1: to send me an email. The thing wouldn't work, no
Speaker 1: matter how many times they hit it over the head
Speaker 1: with something. And by the time they did figure it out,
Speaker 1: they had inadvertently wound up giving me the list of
Speaker 1: everybody at NBC whom they trusted, and whom therefore I
Speaker 1: knew from that moment forward, I could not. On Monday,
Speaker 1: May third, two thousand and four, my executive producer phoned
Speaker 1: me at home and said, we got Ambassador Joe Wilson.
Speaker 1: He'll be on the show tomorrow. Within hours, the communications
Speaker 1: office of the White House of George W. Bush began
Speaker 1: a desperate, ceaseless, tireless effort to send me one email
Speaker 1: with talking points about Ambassador Joe Wilson, which repeatedly hille
Speaker 1: variously failed to get through to me because none of
Speaker 1: them could spell my name correctly. By late in the
Speaker 1: evening of May third, and throughout the morning of May
Speaker 1: the fourth, I got calls and forwarded emails from people
Speaker 1: throughout NBC who had received emails of their own from
Speaker 1: the Bush White House Communications Office, all of them with
Speaker 1: attachments addressed to Keith Oberman without the L, Keith Olberman
Speaker 1: with only one N, Kaieth Olberman Keith spelled wrong, and
Speaker 1: even Keith Overman with a V. This was actually truly
Speaker 1: the first day I believed I was having an impact
Speaker 1: on the Bush White House, and also the first day
Speaker 1: I realized they were incredibly stupid. There Democracy still had
Speaker 1: a slim chance. The Internet had been operating at more
Speaker 1: or less its present speed since about nineteen ninety seven
Speaker 1: or nineteen ninety eight. My name was all over the
Speaker 1: Internet in articles about my news career, about my sports career,
Speaker 1: about my my previous news career. There were articles I
Speaker 1: had written, there were books I had written, and these
Speaker 1: people who were trying to reshape the United States of
Speaker 1: America into a reactionary, conservative, cruel, xenophobic, semi authoritarian state,
Speaker 1: we're not smart enough to figure out how to spell
Speaker 1: my name, just so we know who we are talking about.
Speaker 1: By this point, Scott McClellan had succeeded the infamous Aary
Speaker 1: Fleischer as press secretary. His deputies were Dana Perino, who
Speaker 1: went from being the stupidest person ever to be White
Speaker 1: House Press secretary to being one of the stupidest persons
Speaker 1: ever to have a show on Fox News, Pamela Is Stevens,
Speaker 1: who later wound up as a producer at CNN. Because
Speaker 1: political press people are exactly like unemployed football coaches or
Speaker 1: baseball managers who get TV jobs and then leave the
Speaker 1: TV jobs to go back onto the field, the communications
Speaker 1: director was named Dan Bartlett, and there was another communications
Speaker 1: person there named Nicole Wallace, who has somehow shaken off
Speaker 1: the stink of working for both George and Jeb Bush
Speaker 1: and is now considered a darling of MSNBC, even though
Speaker 1: her only true non fascist credential is she doesn't like
Speaker 1: Trump either. The crack White House media team representing the
Speaker 1: most powerful man in the world in the anxious and
Speaker 1: foreshadowing years after nine to eleven, and not one of
Speaker 1: them could even find anybody else who could spell my name,
Speaker 1: let alone spell it themselves. More on them in a moment,
Speaker 1: But I need to explain who Joe Wilson was if
Speaker 1: you don't know, and why he was so important. Long
Speaker 1: before Colin Powell confessed to Tim Russert that he had
Speaker 1: been lied to by the White House and thus he
Speaker 1: himself had lied to the United Nations about Sadam Hussein's
Speaker 1: imaginary weapons of mass destruction. Those were the excuses from
Speaker 1: Bush Cheney for dragging this country into an unnecessary and
Speaker 1: national soul destroying war in Iraq. Lies and torture and
Speaker 1: scapegoating and suppression and brutality. Before that, there was Ambassador
Speaker 1: Joseph Charles Wilson, the fourth and in two thousand and two,
Speaker 1: after pressure from the White House, the CIA sent him
Speaker 1: back to the scene of his first diplomatic posting, the
Speaker 1: African nation of Niger to get proof for Bush that
Speaker 1: Saddam was trying to buy yellow cake uranium there to
Speaker 1: make nuclear bombses out of. And Wilson quickly found out
Speaker 1: it was nonsense, and he reported back and the Bush
Speaker 1: White House promptly buried his findings and instead, in the
Speaker 1: two thousand and three State of the Union address, just
Speaker 1: before he started bombing Iraq, George W. Bush said, the
Speaker 1: British government has learned that Sadam Hussein recently sought significant
Speaker 1: quantities of uranium from Africa. It was and remains a
Speaker 1: complete lie, and war occurred because of it, and Joe
Speaker 1: Wilson called it a complete lie in an op ed
Speaker 1: in The New York Times on July sixth, two thousand
Speaker 1: and three. The Iraq War was still at this stage
Speaker 1: defined by Rah Rah. We're winning, but Sadam's WMD and
Speaker 1: his biological weapons and his chemical weapons might be over
Speaker 1: the next hill. And you'd better not criticize what we're doing,
Speaker 1: or maybe you're a terrorist, Joe Wilson said. The Emperor
Speaker 1: had no clothes. In two thousand and three, he was
Speaker 1: an American Hero of the highest order. A week later,
Speaker 1: a Dick Cheney flunky named Scooter Libby and a Deputy
Speaker 1: Secretary of State named Armitage began a campaign to punish
Speaker 1: Joe Wilson and discredit him. They leaked to a dyspeptic
Speaker 1: and hate filled columnist named Robert Novak, who is now
Speaker 1: working in the Bureau in Hell, that Wilson's wife was
Speaker 1: an undercover agent for the CIA, and that her name
Speaker 1: was Valerie Plame, and that the pair of them were
Speaker 1: dirty Democrats. And moreover, it was Plame who had urged
Speaker 1: that her own husband be sent to Niger to deliberately
Speaker 1: not find the uranium or the Sadam Hussein signed rics seeds,
Speaker 1: or whatever Bush expected to find there. The Bush White
Speaker 1: House destroyed the career of risked the life of and
Speaker 1: ruined several assignments and contacts of one of this country's
Speaker 1: own secret CIA agents just to make her husband look bad.
Speaker 1: So in May two thousand and four, when Joe Wilson
Speaker 1: wrote a book about all this crap, and he inexplicably
Speaker 1: wanted to go on MSNBC, which was still at that
Speaker 1: point trying to be more conservative than Fox Nudes and
Speaker 1: wanted to go on my little watched show, which was
Speaker 1: considered the neutral outlier on a network full of Joe
Speaker 1: Scarboroughs and Michael Savage's. This was a happy surprise for us,
Speaker 1: which was followed by this wonderful, flailing effort by the
Speaker 1: Bush White House to send me talking points about Joe
Speaker 1: Wilson before I interviewed him. They not only could not
Speaker 1: spell my name, but they were utterly convinced that my
Speaker 1: interview was designed to discredit Joe Wilson. The talking points,
Speaker 1: which eventually got to me from Assistant Press Secretary Pamela Stevens,
Speaker 1: consisted of six items over two pages. The headings were
Speaker 1: as follows. One political motivation. This was about Wilson calling
Speaker 1: Dick Cheney a lying SOB about a year after the
Speaker 1: knee jair trip. I couldn't figure this one out. Dick
Speaker 1: Cheney was a lying SOB. That's how I got to
Speaker 1: be vice president. Two Gingrich spokesman calls allegations about alleged
Speaker 1: March two thousand and three meeting completely falls. This cited
Speaker 1: Newt Gingrich and his people as if they were good
Speaker 1: sources as opposed to the punchlines they already were back
Speaker 1: then in two thousand and four, talking point number three,
Speaker 1: McClellan points out political objective, and four McClellan addresses accusations.
Speaker 1: These were quotes from the press secretary. This man suddenly
Speaker 1: quit that job two years later two thousand and six,
Speaker 1: and confessed he had repeatedly lied for George W. Bush
Speaker 1: and the others, and now he just couldn't take it anymore.
Speaker 1: And he would come on my show, Joe and give
Speaker 1: one of the best atonement interviews I've ever heard. It
Speaker 1: went on for forty five minutes. Five Fleischer says VP
Speaker 1: office did not request trip a quote from McClellan's predecessor,
Speaker 1: who unless he is talking about baseball, you should assume
Speaker 1: he's lying. Plus he might be lying about baseball. And finally,
Speaker 1: six statement by George J. Tennant July eleven, two thousand
Speaker 1: and three. This was a quote from the CIA director
Speaker 1: which they thought was their home run, and it basically
Speaker 1: consisted of this. Bush never saw that report. That was it.
Speaker 1: There are three punchlines to this story. Number One, I
Speaker 1: don't know why the Bush Communications office assumed I was
Speaker 1: there to take down Joe Wilson. But the moment I
Speaker 1: saw these talking points, any lingering doubt I had that
Speaker 1: they were not all lying bastards down there was erased.
Speaker 1: I used the talking points in my interview, all right.
Speaker 1: I read them out loud to Joe Wilson, and he
Speaker 1: re but at each of them with impeccable charm and elegance.
Speaker 1: He and Valerie Plain became regular guests on My show
Speaker 1: and would beat the crap out of George Bush with
Speaker 1: the plum right through the morning of January twenty, two
Speaker 1: thousand and nine. Second punchline. A year earlier, a supply
Speaker 1: clerk with a maintenance company on the ground in Iraq
Speaker 1: was captured Private Jessica Lynch. The military and the Bush
Speaker 1: administration immediately put out the story that she was being
Speaker 1: tortured by them evil Iraqi Sadam Hussein doctors. There was
Speaker 1: the glorious rescue of Jessica Lynch which followed, and the
Speaker 1: parades and the you better not question this story period,
Speaker 1: which lasted about six weeks until a Toronto newspaper printed
Speaker 1: a substantially different account that Lynch was rescued from an
Speaker 1: Iraqi hospital and a US military team in good faith
Speaker 1: went in to extract her, but that this was all
Speaker 1: arranged not by some sort of part of intelligence or
Speaker 1: un US operations or the Allies, but by the Iraqi doctors.
Speaker 1: Some of them sneaked over to American lines at great
Speaker 1: danger and said, one of your soldiers is hurt and
Speaker 1: we don't have the right equipment to help her. Could
Speaker 1: you swing by and pick her up? I reported that
Speaker 1: version on MSNBC, and the next day, as I was
Speaker 1: still taking my coat off, my boss, Phil Griffin called
Speaker 1: me in and said that the head of NBC News
Speaker 1: and the president of NBC, Bob Wright, had been on
Speaker 1: the phone all morning to him, insisting I should be
Speaker 1: fired for implying that the Bush administration had lied. Griffin
Speaker 1: proudly said he had talked them into letting me get
Speaker 1: away with just apologizing to the troops. I can't even
Speaker 1: read this with a straight face now, twenty years later,
Speaker 1: apologizing to the troops who rescued her, I must credit
Speaker 1: myself when my brain was fulled in that I did
Speaker 1: some quick thinking. The demand was comical nonsense Journalistically. On
Speaker 1: the other hand, if I agreed to apologize to, okay,
Speaker 1: the troops who rescued her whoever you want, I would
Speaker 1: get the chance to tell the whole real story of
Speaker 1: Jessica Lynch again, so I did. The apology was fifteen seconds,
Speaker 1: and while unnecessary, was sincere I didn't want to make
Speaker 1: the troops look bad. They didn't know anything about this crap.
Speaker 1: I made sure, however, that the retelling of the true
Speaker 1: Lynch rescue story took about two and a half minutes.
Speaker 1: That was in June of two thousand and three. So
Speaker 1: why as of May of two thousand and four, the
Speaker 1: Bush White House thought I was sympathetic to them, I'll
Speaker 1: never know, or why they bothered with me, I'll never know,
Speaker 1: which brings me to the last point. The unintended side
Speaker 1: effect with the long term impact of all those failed
Speaker 1: White House emails with my name misspelled was that this
Speaker 1: Pamelas Stevens person promptly forwarded them to people around NBC
Speaker 1: whom she considered friendly to George W. Bush. One of
Speaker 1: them was Tom Brokaw's assistant, another was in the office
Speaker 1: of future NBC News president Steve Cappus, and the final
Speaker 1: one was to some guy named George Uribey. And so
Speaker 1: I found out all the people in the Bush administrations
Speaker 1: we like them. List at NBC News who I should
Speaker 1: avoid under all circumstances. Let's see Brokaw's assistance. So no Brokaw,
Speaker 1: somebody in Cappus's office and no Cappus and this guy
Speaker 1: George Ribey. And George ribe turned out to be a
Speaker 1: guy hired by MSNBC from Fox News to go work
Speaker 1: for Scarborough. He fell out of favor with Joe Scarborough
Speaker 1: and I guess he didn't henchman enough for Joe's taste,
Speaker 1: and his influence fell to a guy. I don't think
Speaker 1: I've mentioned him to you yet. Chris licked. Believe it
Speaker 1: or not, there are still more new idiots to talk about.
Speaker 1: The daily roundup of the miscrants, morons and dunning kruegrip
Speaker 1: X specimens who constitute today's other worst persons in the world.
Speaker 1: Here are your nominees. The bronze worse Stephanie Borrowitz. Stephanie
Speaker 1: Borrowitz is a standard issue, utterly fungible, completely Stepford wife,
Speaker 1: religious nut job representing the seventy sixth District of the
Speaker 1: Pennsylvania State House of Representatives. The seventy sixth the seventy
Speaker 1: six you know, Limestone Township and Mifflinburgh. Stephanie, who once
Speaker 1: booed the capital officers from January sixth and insisted there
Speaker 1: was no January sixth, is just dangerous enough to hurt herself.
Speaker 1: And she has. The Bucks County Beacon reports that she
Speaker 1: has now posted and boasted on social media about how
Speaker 1: you should always see how your representative votes and not
Speaker 1: what they say. And she's super duper proud of her
Speaker 1: one hundred percent lifetime score, her total approval, her completely nonpartisan,
Speaker 1: a political grade from the John Birch Society. I'll just
Speaker 1: say that again. She has a one hundred percent lifetime score,
Speaker 1: this Pennsylvania state representative from the John Birch Society. All right,
Speaker 1: if I have to explain the John Birch Society, let
Speaker 1: me just sum it up thusly while you google. It's
Speaker 1: the Ku Klux Klan only for those of you who
Speaker 1: don't like fires and who do have shoes. Mifleinburg the
Speaker 1: runner up. Why it's Steve Bannon, and I have good
Speaker 1: news for you. We've broken him. We broke him. All
Speaker 1: those annoying complaints about his violent language and implied threats
Speaker 1: and delusions of grandeur, Well it's finally happened Steve has
Speaker 1: begun to edit himself, boasting on his online feed, which
Speaker 1: is like one step up now from the Michael Savage
Speaker 1: Kvetchelon hour about the l folderou from the lawyers, from
Speaker 1: Paul kama Weiss. You remember one of the stories before
Speaker 1: Signal Gates. Bannon was typically filled with violent fantasies, but
Speaker 1: this time they had a difference. He is self editing.
Speaker 1: Let me quote Bannon, you only beat them by hitting
Speaker 1: them upside the head with a two x four. That's
Speaker 1: a metaphor, put their heads on pikes. Metaphor metaphor unquote
Speaker 1: ten second quote He used the word metaphor three times.
Speaker 1: Gotta say, without the violent threats, it ain't much of
Speaker 1: a show anymore, Steve. Huh. But our winner, speaking of
Speaker 1: all threats, it's Bill Maher. So I've mentioned before. Bill
Speaker 1: Maher has gotten imperceptibly but steadily dumber every day that
Speaker 1: I've known him, and I've known him since about this
Speaker 1: time of year in nineteen seventy eight. Now he says
Speaker 1: he has a new friend, Kid Rock. How dumb do
Speaker 1: you have to be to have Kid Rock as a
Speaker 1: friend as a new friend, Like you just made a
Speaker 1: deliberate choice to become friends with Kid Rock. It's like
Speaker 1: saying I've just made the deliberate choice to get a
Speaker 1: venereal disease. Those two topics are not connected, Kid Rock
Speaker 1: and venereal disease. Quoting mar, I mean Kid Rock was
Speaker 1: here a couple of weeks ago. I want you to
Speaker 1: meet Trump. He said, I'm going to take you to
Speaker 1: the White House. So now we're going. Good plan. Bill.
Speaker 1: If Kid rockets stopped by and said I want you
Speaker 1: to meet Hitler, I'm gonna take you to Hell, would
Speaker 1: we've gone there? Actually, now that I think of it,
Speaker 1: if there were girls there, Yeah, probably would have gone
Speaker 1: to anyway. Mar was on this podcast. He also said
Speaker 1: he's convinced Musk is not doing what he's doing to
Speaker 1: get richer. Bill's kind of naive at times. Quote he
Speaker 1: does not care about money, which circles back to my
Speaker 1: earlier point about Bill getting dumber every year, every month,
Speaker 1: every week, every day. And he insists he is going
Speaker 1: to go to the White House. Quote, that's my model
Speaker 1: for meeting Trump. It's like be respectful, which he deserves.
Speaker 1: He won not once but twice. All right, how many
Speaker 1: people in life have won and you wouldn't cross the
Speaker 1: street to meet them. You're gonna go to the White
Speaker 1: House to meet this turd. It's funny, Mar continued. Girl
Speaker 1: said to me, what are you gonna wear? I said,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna dress like Zelenski. There's news in there
Speaker 1: by the way, Bill, Bill has a new girl. Bill's
Speaker 1: new girl has been in the country long enough that
Speaker 1: she can speak English. Bill His new girl has been
Speaker 1: in the country long enough she can speak English. Anastagia
Speaker 1: dot com Mar two days other worst person in the world. Now,
Speaker 1: while I'm here, it's worth giving you the whole background
Speaker 1: about Bill maher Like I said, my history with him
Speaker 1: dates to the nineteen seventies, and it sat there unrevealed
Speaker 1: for thirty years until one day it all flashed over
Speaker 1: me like this. Sometime in nineteen eighty five or nineteen
Speaker 1: eighty six, I saw a movie on cable called DC
Speaker 1: Cabs a character, and it clearly the actor portraying him
Speaker 1: was talented and funny. But for some reason I felt
Speaker 1: like I knew him from somewhere, and I really didn't
Speaker 1: like him. I remember the feeling was so strong that
Speaker 1: I stuck around to watch the credits to find out
Speaker 1: who he was. His name was Bill Mayher mher Well.
Speaker 1: I had a teacher named Bill Mayer, but his name
Speaker 1: had a y in it. He was my advisor in
Speaker 1: high school. Now it wasn't him, but I knew three things.
Speaker 1: He was talented, I didn't like him, and I knew
Speaker 1: him from somewhere. This is pre internet, of course, so
Speaker 1: no way to find out where I knew him from.
Speaker 1: Hallowell's annual film guide would be my best bet. Maybe
Speaker 1: he'd be in the new one coming out checked calendar
Speaker 1: just eight or nine months from now. Eventually I found
Speaker 1: out Bill Maher was in the year ahead of mine
Speaker 1: at Cornell University. He was not at my radio station,
Speaker 1: he was not in my college. Maybe I knew him
Speaker 1: from a class somewhere. I could never nail it down.
Speaker 1: I like to say I have a photographic memory, but
Speaker 1: it's all polaroids, and I haven't always bothered to label them.
Speaker 1: Almost everything that ever happened he is stuck inside this
Speaker 1: big empty head of mine. But often key details like who, what, when,
Speaker 1: and where are just missing. Never wrote him down, and honestly,
Speaker 1: in this case, it was not worth the effort. I
Speaker 1: knew I was was the right word. The word was aware.
Speaker 1: Of him when we were both in college. Occasionally, especially
Speaker 1: after I went from ESPN to MSNBC in nineteen ninety seven,
Speaker 1: a writer would note the coincidence of university and years
Speaker 1: and ask me about it, and I would say just
Speaker 1: that I don't remember if he was in a class
Speaker 1: with me or I knew him somehow, But I was
Speaker 1: aware of Bill Maher, and then twenty two years ago,
Speaker 1: this month, November twenty third, two thousand, I went on
Speaker 1: his old show, Politically Incorrect, used to be the late
Speaker 1: night show on ABC. This was when I was doing
Speaker 1: sports for Fox in LA and it wasn't all sports episode.
Speaker 1: Lennox Lewis, the boxer, Mark Cuban, the owner of the
Speaker 1: Dallas Mavericks, Todd Zeal the first basement of the New
Speaker 1: York Mets, and me from Fox Sports. When I met
Speaker 1: Bill Maher before the show, I asked him about Cornell
Speaker 1: and whether or not we ran into each other. I
Speaker 1: didn't know anybody there. I didn't see anybody. I didn't
Speaker 1: go comedy anywhere. I didn't talk to anybody. I didn't
Speaker 1: meet you. Okay, excuse me. That settles it. Except during
Speaker 1: the recording of the show when Mark contradicted me. On
Speaker 1: some point I got angry at him, and there was
Speaker 1: no reason to get angry at him, so I dismissed
Speaker 1: the anger, and I dismissed the moment. Except on the
Speaker 1: way home, I kept thinking, I know him from school somehow,
Speaker 1: no matter what he says, and I know I didn't
Speaker 1: like him in school. In the next decade, Bill switched
Speaker 1: to his weekly HBO political show, and I went back
Speaker 1: and turned MSNBC into a political network. And the Internet
Speaker 1: happened so that Cornell juxtaposition became easier for for reporters
Speaker 1: to stumble over, so I would tell them the same thing.
Speaker 1: I can't remember the details, but for twenty nine years
Speaker 1: now I have been convinced I was aware of Bill
Speaker 1: Maher at Cornell. Finally came the day March twentieth, two
Speaker 1: thousand and nine, when they asked me to go on
Speaker 1: real time and Bill Maher Cornell University seventy eight asked
Speaker 1: me Cornell University seventy nine, something about colleges, and I said, well,
Speaker 1: as you know, we overlapped at Cornell, and I don't
Speaker 1: know if we met, but I was aware of you there.
Speaker 1: And he interrupted and said, no, you weren't, and I
Speaker 1: just went back and answered his question. Now, after every
Speaker 1: episode of his program, Mar has or at least had
Speaker 1: a little party backstage, I mean, catered with booze and
Speaker 1: with more guests than there are people in the studio audience,
Speaker 1: and usually a bunch of models. Having done that show
Speaker 1: four times, where they will fly you in first class
Speaker 1: and put you up for the weekend in LA just
Speaker 1: to do their show, and there's a party. I began
Speaker 1: to suspect that, like many of the guests, Bill Maher
Speaker 1: does the show just so he can have the party. Anyway.
Speaker 1: Not long after it started, it overcomes Mar and he's
Speaker 1: mad at me. And mind you, even if his allegation
Speaker 1: that he is five feet eight is correct, I'm just
Speaker 1: under six', four so he's giving up a lot of
Speaker 1: height during an, argument and he starts yapping about HOW
Speaker 1: i should stop SAYING i was a way heir of
Speaker 1: him At cornell And i'm just trying to get publicity
Speaker 1: off something that never. Happened and who could remember that
Speaker 1: kind of crap? Anyway and he never talked to anybody
Speaker 1: in four years in college because, quote except for The
Speaker 1: Ethica High school, STUDENTS i sold drugs to, unquote AND
Speaker 1: i notice he's getting, heated and this is just triggering
Speaker 1: that core belief of mine THAT i was aware of
Speaker 1: him in college AND i didn't like, Him and now
Speaker 1: it becomes clear to me he didn't like me. Either
Speaker 1: he's getting loud enough and he's swinging his arm around
Speaker 1: now and it looks kind of, funny but apparently it
Speaker 1: happens in the office. Sometimes and this is When Scott,
Speaker 1: carter who was the executive producer WHOM i definitely did
Speaker 1: know since like nineteen ninety two when he worked At
Speaker 1: Comedy central with my Friend Alan, Havy Scott carter comes
Speaker 1: over to defuse the. Situation scott was a three piece
Speaker 1: suit kind of guy with a thumbs tucking the, vest
Speaker 1: who would call a group of men, fellows as in say.
Speaker 1: Fellows So scott comes over and, says say fellows with
Speaker 1: Your cornell alumni reunion, here and of course this Makes
Speaker 1: Bill maher even. Angrier let me ask you. SOMETHING i
Speaker 1: used to drive down From hobart to see concerts At.
Speaker 1: Cornell have to, SAY i Think cornell was the leading
Speaker 1: concert school in the nation back in our. Day and
Speaker 1: Now scott starts the list who he saw in concert
Speaker 1: At Cornell Robert palmer and the Famous Grateful dead concert
Speaker 1: At cornell At Barton. Hall he was. There AND i,
Speaker 1: SAY i went To, springsteen And mar mumbles something About
Speaker 1: loggins And, messina AND i know What carter is doing.
Speaker 1: Here he's, Diffusing and we do a couple of rounds
Speaker 1: of who saw Which cornell? Concert and FINALLY i, SAY
Speaker 1: i can top both of you comic. GENIUSES i Saw
Speaker 1: Robert kleine in concert At. Cornell now it is, criminal
Speaker 1: but there's an excellent chance you may not know Who
Speaker 1: Robert kline, is suffice to say as prominent a comedian
Speaker 1: in the sixties seventies eighties As George carlin Or richard PRYOR.
Speaker 1: Hbo itself was built on Annual George carlin concerts and
Speaker 1: Annual Robert klin concerts and everybody. Else And Robert kline
Speaker 1: wasn't quite as deep or eternal As George, carlin but
Speaker 1: he was really on the money During watergate and During.
Speaker 1: Reagan SO i, SAY i Saw Robert klein in concert At,
Speaker 1: cornell And mar looks at me funny and not, angrily
Speaker 1: and says, QUIETLY i was at that. TOO i Saw
Speaker 1: Robert klink, two AND i don't really register That mar's
Speaker 1: mood has now utterly. Changed he's not, angry he's. Confused,
Speaker 1: WELL i, SAY i can still top, you because after
Speaker 1: that CONCERT i Interviewed Robert. Klein Now Bill maher starts to,
Speaker 1: squint and he looks at, me and he looks At Scott,
Speaker 1: carter and he looks back at, me and he, says,
Speaker 1: WAIT i Interviewed kleine after that concert. Too And i'm
Speaker 1: smiling through all, this and smiling and smiling and, smiling
Speaker 1: and then, suddenly simultaneously it Hits Bill maher and me
Speaker 1: at the same, moment in the same fullness of, detail
Speaker 1: AND i stop, smiling AND i shout At Bill, maher
Speaker 1: You and he pulls his arms in towards his stomach
Speaker 1: and kind of bends forward at the waist and covers
Speaker 1: his face with his, hands and he, says Oh, God
Speaker 1: i'm so, Sorry, jesus it can't. Be i'm, Sorry i'm.
Speaker 1: Sorry and while the anger wells up inside me so,
Speaker 1: POWERFULLY i can almost see it in my own, Eyeballs
Speaker 1: Bill maher's concert going Producer Scott carter is really. Confused, say,
Speaker 1: fellows DID i miss something or DID i have a
Speaker 1: brief stroke or? Episode AND i, Say, bill AND i
Speaker 1: just remembered HOW i happened to be aware of him in.
Speaker 1: School And mar still has got his hands over his
Speaker 1: face and people are looking at, us And bill is shouting,
Speaker 1: apologies AND i, say you want to tell? Him or SHOULD?
Speaker 1: I And mar just shakes his body no and, mumbles Oh,
Speaker 1: god you do. IT i, CAN'T i, CAN'T i, Can't
Speaker 1: and it all came back to. Me for, YEARS i
Speaker 1: would tell people the story of The Robert klein concert
Speaker 1: At Cornell university in nineteen seventy. Eight our radio station
Speaker 1: co sponsored his appearance along with The Cornell Concert, commission
Speaker 1: and in the contract we specified that a couple of
Speaker 1: us real comedy nerds at the radio station would get
Speaker 1: to go backstage afterwards and tape a brief ten or
Speaker 1: fifteen minute interview With Robert. Klin, basically we paid him not,
Speaker 1: much but we paid him to do an. Interview and
Speaker 1: when my Pal Andy grossman AND i get backstage to
Speaker 1: talk To Robert, klein and we have our two microphones
Speaker 1: and two mike stands and three tape, recorders there is this,
Speaker 1: guy this short, guy and he's yelling at the chief
Speaker 1: of The Corneill Concert, commission and he's yelling At Robert clin's,
Speaker 1: manager and he's demanding that he should get to Interview
Speaker 1: Robert clin, because Like, klein this kid says he is
Speaker 1: a stand up comedian and he publishes The Cornell Humor.
Speaker 1: Magazine and he points at me and he says he
Speaker 1: should get priority over these quote corporate sellouts from The
Speaker 1: Cornell radio. STATION i hated him on. Site oh, WAIT
Speaker 1: i say to him in nineteen seventy. Eight and he's
Speaker 1: small and he's got, dirty stringy hair and he's, loud
Speaker 1: AND i, say you are the publisher of The Cornell humor,
Speaker 1: magazine The Cornell. Widow and he snorts and SAYS i
Speaker 1: would get dead publishing that corporate, Sellout Cornell. Widow and
Speaker 1: SO i, say oh, so then that means you're the
Speaker 1: publisher of The Cornell Alternative humor, magazine The Not So
Speaker 1: Big red or whatever it is they call. It he,
Speaker 1: says no, way they are corporate. SELLOUTS i publish. This
Speaker 1: and he pulls out a stack of mimeographed pages stapled
Speaker 1: together and there's like a drawing on the front of
Speaker 1: a naked girl and. Handwritten it says it's his comedy.
Speaker 1: Magazine AND i look At Robert klein's manager AND i, say,
Speaker 1: so it's ten. O'clock and if you leave now while
Speaker 1: this idiot is screwing this, up the limo can still
Speaker 1: get Mister klein To elaine's in the city before it, closes,
Speaker 1: Right and the manager is wildly, impressed you know Of.
Speaker 1: Elaine's AND i said, yes AND i felt like an.
Speaker 1: Adult AND i also, said if we give this guy
Speaker 1: five minutes of our time right now while we're setting
Speaker 1: up our tape, recorders can we still have ten minutes
Speaker 1: with Mister. Klein and the manager, says good. PLAN i
Speaker 1: like the way you, think and he points to the
Speaker 1: kid and gestures for him to come. Along, no the kid,
Speaker 1: SHOUTS i want half an. Hour these corporate sellouts deserve.
Speaker 1: Nothing and Now i'm getting. ANGRY i, say, buddy so
Speaker 1: far all the corporations in the world have paid me
Speaker 1: about one hundred. Bucks SO i threaten. Him, now mind,
Speaker 1: YOU i believe this is literally. True since nineteen sixty,
Speaker 1: seven WHEN i was eight years, OLD i have started
Speaker 1: two fistfights two in fifty five. YEARS i am a
Speaker 1: man of. PEACE i am, loud BUT i am a
Speaker 1: man of. Peace BUT i say to this, guy you
Speaker 1: now have two, choices, kid five minutes With Robert klein
Speaker 1: OR i hit you in the. Face and he runs
Speaker 1: to where client's manager is still gesturing towards, him and
Speaker 1: he screams corporate sell, out and he disappears to do his,
Speaker 1: interview and behind him he leaves his little home made
Speaker 1: mimeograph ten or twelve page humor. Publication AND i pick it,
Speaker 1: up AND i read it and register it and dismiss
Speaker 1: it BEFORE i leave the. Building and IF i had
Speaker 1: only remembered what it said on the, cover all the
Speaker 1: years of mystery AND i was aware of, him and
Speaker 1: all that would never have, happened because the cover of
Speaker 1: the magazine Read Bill Maher's Comedy magazine By Bill. Maher
Speaker 1: and now back in well technically this is, correct back
Speaker 1: in real. Time at the party in The hollywood studio
Speaker 1: in two thousand and, nine the Producer Scott carter says,
Speaker 1: nothing And Bill maher is still doubled over in, shame
Speaker 1: AND i, say are you satisfied THAT i was aware of?
Speaker 1: You and he mumbles, Yes AND i, say will you
Speaker 1: ever question my? Memory? Again and he mumbles, no and he,
Speaker 1: says IF i need him to do my show or
Speaker 1: a charity benefit or, something just. Call and he says he's,
Speaker 1: ashamed and he offer to be his hand to, shake
Speaker 1: and we, shake and FINALLY i, say and by the,
Speaker 1: Way Bill maher Of Bill Maher's Comedy magazine By Bill,
Speaker 1: maher are you a corporate? Sellout and he says Kind
Speaker 1: and that's HOW i was aware Of Bill maher in.
Speaker 1: College i've done all the DAMAGE i can do. Here
Speaker 1: thank you for. Listening you, KNOW i was thinking MAYBE
Speaker 1: i should get on this signal App this thing sounds
Speaker 1: like a lot of. Fun better THAN. X Brian ray
Speaker 1: And John Phillip. Shanelle the musical directors Have Countdown arrange
Speaker 1: produced and performed most of our. Music Mister chanelle handled
Speaker 1: orchestration and, Keyboards Mister ray was on, guitars bass and,
Speaker 1: drums and it was produced By Tko. Brothers our satirical
Speaker 1: and pithy musical comments are by the best baseball stadium organist,
Speaker 1: Ever Nancy. Faust the sports music is The olberman theme
Speaker 1: FROM espn, two written By Mitch Warren davis courtesy OF, Espn.
Speaker 1: Inc other music arranged and performed by the Group No Horns.
Speaker 1: Allowed my announcer today was Also Nancy. Faust everything else,
Speaker 1: was as ever my. Fault that's countdown for, Today just one,
Speaker 1: thousand three hundred and ninety six days until the scheduled
Speaker 1: end of his lane duck and lame brain, term Unless
Speaker 1: musk removes him sooner or the actuarial tables. Do the
Speaker 1: next scheduled countdown Is. Monday as, always boldens as the news.
Speaker 1: Warrants remember in Peach trump it won't work, now it
Speaker 1: will Win democrats the midterms if there are midterms until next.
Speaker 1: Time I'm Keith. Olberman good, morning good, afternoon good, night
Speaker 1: and we'll wait for it. Here Good. Luck countdown With
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