Speaker 1: Talk. We're just too unapologetically black women with an opinion
Speaker 1: to talk back. What's up, y'all, it's your girl, a
Speaker 1: j Welcome to a new episode. If we talked back
Speaker 1: A Hey, y'all, it's tam Bell and I'm broken hearted.
Speaker 1: You're not. I don't mind. I'm hurting because, man, these
Speaker 1: niggas is trash. It's like, not all of them, but
Speaker 1: the one I'm thinking about. Yeah. Here. I love y'all. Though,
Speaker 1: if I ain't told y'all a long time, I feel
Speaker 1: like I ain't told y'all in a minute. Um. I
Speaker 1: went to d Artists past weekend by myself and I
Speaker 1: had a lot of fun. Actually, I hung out with
Speaker 1: this old man on the first night who was a
Speaker 1: foreign diplomat. Yeah, I know he was. He was cool.
Speaker 1: Probably was, um, what's those people are hit man? What
Speaker 1: if well he hits he hit nothing out there. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tell you that he hit me. He thought he
Speaker 1: was gonna hit me too. At the end of the night,
Speaker 1: he looked so disappointed. I was like, sorry, Grandpa, I
Speaker 1: gotta go. Did he have that gray got that gray
Speaker 1: line around his pupil? No, he wasn't that old. He
Speaker 1: was like fifty three. Mm, that's not old. I kind
Speaker 1: of like fifty three year olds. M hmmm, that's too
Speaker 1: old for me. They did he was he black. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he was youthful. He was a youthful fifty three. He
Speaker 1: wasn't like, you know, go get the soldier out the trunk.
Speaker 1: He going my keys. He wasn't that old, but he
Speaker 1: was old. He's too old for me, but he was
Speaker 1: a lot of fun and he cut me sauce up.
Speaker 1: I don't know if y'll follow my Instagram, but was
Speaker 1: I had a whole Instagram rant drunk is Someone said, girl,
Speaker 1: you're drunk. Her in a football back. I don't even
Speaker 1: a football back. She saw that she's drunk, because what
Speaker 1: the fun is a football back? Exactly That's exactly how
Speaker 1: drunk I was. Then I wrote, I was in Santo Domingo,
Speaker 1: and I left Santo Domingo and I went to Punta Conor,
Speaker 1: which was like across the country, two and a half
Speaker 1: hour drive, and I got an uber and my uber
Speaker 1: hit somebody, like literally hit a man on a motorcycle
Speaker 1: like I know what you did last summer type ship? Yeah,
Speaker 1: some ship like that and drove off. So I hope
Speaker 1: it ain't no dominicanting out here ready to come get me.
Speaker 1: I was a passenger to I was, I was a
Speaker 1: victim to sir. And she ain't speaking no English, so
Speaker 1: I was like sitting there stunned, and she just was
Speaker 1: looking in the review at me, and then she just
Speaker 1: put her hand in the air like and she just
Speaker 1: kept going yo. So that's how didn't get down of
Speaker 1: dr They just be hitting motherfucker's on the highway. That's
Speaker 1: sound like China and something because they don't be having
Speaker 1: on stoplights and stop signs. They just be driving. They
Speaker 1: just be going. I don't see e men. Why they
Speaker 1: have lanes there just for decoration. I think because nobody
Speaker 1: adheres to them, like in the Yes. But that was
Speaker 1: really the only adventure I had was you know, someone
Speaker 1: getting hit by a car. But but I had a
Speaker 1: good time. I went to the beach, but I ain't
Speaker 1: get in the beach. I ain't getting the water. I
Speaker 1: just was out there someplace for the New Year's I
Speaker 1: need some sun, I need some saying, I need something dick,
Speaker 1: I need all types of ship. I was on our period,
Speaker 1: so I know flow was like, fuck you bitch. I
Speaker 1: didn't even playing for my peer. You know, I have
Speaker 1: a float chart and that my perer was supposed to
Speaker 1: come on the following week, but she came early. Hate.
Speaker 1: That's like your vacation. You see all those memes online
Speaker 1: like a bitch be packing a little overnight whole back
Speaker 1: and the perid come out the other room, like what uppit?
Speaker 1: Where the fund you going without me? Bit? You know,
Speaker 1: I always thought that if I was planning to do
Speaker 1: some whole ship and my perid came on, I thought
Speaker 1: it was aside from God, like I'm not supposed to
Speaker 1: be doing this ship. That's why God like passing your
Speaker 1: sucking ass down for the weekend. You're trying to go
Speaker 1: fun with something you ain't got no business sucking with?
Speaker 1: Who you h at my heart? Did you hurt my heart?
Speaker 1: You know? You can get herpes from someone using a condom? Yeah,
Speaker 1: because of skin contact. It's not like it's not like liquid,
Speaker 1: not liquid but body fluids like people think of other s.
Speaker 1: Cd S is skin contact that it's not really technically
Speaker 1: is it really uh an STD? It's not really an STD.
Speaker 1: It's more like a skin condition, right, But it has
Speaker 1: like such a very bad stigma more than it it is.
Speaker 1: You know, a sickness. Yeah, because if somebody gives you
Speaker 1: all sex who has like fever blisters, simplex one, you
Speaker 1: can get that on your pussy. It may not come
Speaker 1: up as a simplex too, but you're gonna have to be.
Speaker 1: It'll be oral. It'll be oral herpes on your vaginant. Yeah,
Speaker 1: fool fool, fool, fool fool. He got's to be careful.
Speaker 1: It looks of y'all. Didn't know that. Y'all be with
Speaker 1: the niggs who always be getting the fever blisters. I
Speaker 1: always see you want light skin, dudes, and it wins
Speaker 1: the time, Like if y'll be fun with them, dudes,
Speaker 1: get them fever blisters. Just no, pussy might look like
Speaker 1: a damn herpes cry crunch, I mean nestly crunch star Crunch,
Speaker 1: Star crunch bar. We don't hurt be shaman though. What
Speaker 1: about you? What's your what's your weekend? Look like? My
Speaker 1: weekend was all right? I actually did something this weekend.
Speaker 1: I went to a friend's birthday party, little gathering, and
Speaker 1: guess who the DJ was? Erica fucking do Yes. I'm
Speaker 1: jealous of you, Yes, girl, I love I love her.
Speaker 1: She's beautiful too, She's beautiful one of my karaoke songs
Speaker 1: is Tyrone. When I do karaoke, it's either Dixie Chicks
Speaker 1: Earl or Tyrone or UM. I also do Jill Scott
Speaker 1: he Loves Me. Those are my three songs. But Erica
Speaker 1: Bardou is like one of the greatest all time. I love, love,
Speaker 1: love Erica, and she was with her was fat. Yes,
Speaker 1: she would listen like she'd fucking mixing too, like she's
Speaker 1: a real live DJ, like she'd be mixing and all
Speaker 1: of that. But she seems like she might have had
Speaker 1: her leg up on something. But she just was like
Speaker 1: making that thing just like in DJ with her eyes closed. Bitch.
Speaker 1: She gave like some real good Lott affirmations before she
Speaker 1: started um DJ and I love Erica bad Man me too.
Speaker 1: It was a real intimate uh sating that she was there.
Speaker 1: But I was excited about that because that's one of
Speaker 1: my favorite I want to be close friends with your
Speaker 1: close friends so I can be in the midst of
Speaker 1: all that ship. Okay, good luck, bitch, like I'll be
Speaker 1: sending you with people. Not for real, we're gonna be
Speaker 1: in there. But whenever you get a plus one, just
Speaker 1: let me be it until you get one Okay, cool,
Speaker 1: Well that sounds like a fun weekend. I love Erica,
Speaker 1: but do if you tune into the show, we love
Speaker 1: to have you as a guess. You should have tried
Speaker 1: to plug that ship. I know she got the funk
Speaker 1: up out of there too quick though, like she literally
Speaker 1: came to DJ. You know what I'm saying, Like she
Speaker 1: you know what I really want from Erica? Bad God,
Speaker 1: just give me the check. I need like a super
Speaker 1: duperd check when I have a kid. I want Erka
Speaker 1: Baidu to be my dola. That's like a real life
Speaker 1: life goal of mine. I need a h I bring
Speaker 1: some life on this fuck up ass planet. I need
Speaker 1: Erica one of these. I just want to I just
Speaker 1: want to do Erica. I don't want to give no
Speaker 1: no baby behind. I want to play play makeup baby
Speaker 1: with her ass. I'm just joking. People don't think I'm
Speaker 1: gave for real and real life like you you gave
Speaker 1: for the check. I'll just be talking. I'm scared of possy.
Speaker 1: I would need to that should look like a oyster,
Speaker 1: like I love oysters, and my thing is just like
Speaker 1: I just don't want to bitch what we've eating. My
Speaker 1: pussy leg and then like what happens where both of
Speaker 1: our periods sync up, like we're gonna be fighting. We're fighting.
Speaker 1: I'm not with that ship. Like at least a man
Speaker 1: can sunk the ship out of you after he piss
Speaker 1: you off. Like, now I gotta get this cold plastic dick.
Speaker 1: I'm not good with that. I put it in the
Speaker 1: microwave for you, baby shame. Now you got what's the
Speaker 1: ship that microwaves give off? Uh? Girl, we're gonna all
Speaker 1: die one way or another, might as well radiation. No,
Speaker 1: you're eating up food with that motherfucker when I using microwave,
Speaker 1: So I definitely was wouldn't put dick in the microwave.
Speaker 1: I don't use the microwave. I recooked my food on
Speaker 1: the sober I put in the oven. Yeah, me too,
Speaker 1: or the air frying. I'm scared of air friers. Like,
Speaker 1: how then does that work? It's like a it's like
Speaker 1: a I have the stove upside down with a face.
Speaker 1: It's like a confection of him. Is it confection and convection? Yeah? Okay,
Speaker 1: But what we got going on the old school eyes
Speaker 1: though they had to wire, you know, not these flat
Speaker 1: top ships that we got Now, it's the old school,
Speaker 1: that's it. Remember that where you m oh, I guess
Speaker 1: I never even looked at them to see how they
Speaker 1: were actually made. But I don't know. I'm scared of
Speaker 1: I'm scared of all that ship. I just want to
Speaker 1: cook my ship and the stove on the stainless steel pot. Y'all,
Speaker 1: bitches be using them, uh not stainless steel, yeah, stainlessteel.
Speaker 1: You'll be using them non stickpots. All that should be
Speaker 1: scraped up in them pots. That's going to your food.
Speaker 1: I've seen this white lady at the hotel and she
Speaker 1: had on some of those Cardier Love Bengals and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, they're so pretty. I'm not gonna line
Speaker 1: because I'm gonna see if I can get me one
Speaker 1: for Christmas. Bit simp ships about seven thousand dollars a piece,
Speaker 1: and she had on three, Like bit y'all robbed you
Speaker 1: out here like a bit just jumking. I want to
Speaker 1: rob nobody, but yeah, on three of them, I just
Speaker 1: won't want what the hell I got to do with
Speaker 1: the damn air fryer? Bit Like, why you think about that, lady? Bracelets?
Speaker 1: I don't know, so just took me back to beautiful.
Speaker 1: If anybody want to buy me a Cardier bracelet, thank you,
Speaker 1: I love you? All right? Did you see Stevie J?
Speaker 1: Girl moving right along? Did you see Stevie J what
Speaker 1: he did to Faith? Faith? Did his I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you something, So I saw somebody like when they put
Speaker 1: the video out of them arguing and him accusing her
Speaker 1: of having stuff like having somebody in their house. They're
Speaker 1: probably broken up. And yeah, she might have had the
Speaker 1: next nigg over very well possible, right, but that's funked up,
Speaker 1: all right, y'all. If y'all y'all weren't paying the taste
Speaker 1: to this week, Stevie J and ain't broke up, y'all.
Speaker 1: But did we not see that coming? But they tried.
Speaker 1: I didn't think that was gonna last forever. And then
Speaker 1: the altercation aired and you know, went viral, and he
Speaker 1: accused her of bringing the nigg in the house and
Speaker 1: sucking him in the house. Listen, that's that's the kind
Speaker 1: of strict get you killed right there. You gotta be careful.
Speaker 1: I never was interested in what what her sign was
Speaker 1: her astrological sign until I read I think either was
Speaker 1: on ts R ball alert. The video right, yes, listen
Speaker 1: when he said you had another bit of the house
Speaker 1: and she was like m but just said, wait a minute,
Speaker 1: what the fuck is Faith signed? Because that would have
Speaker 1: been my response another nigga, I'm sleep, I'm going to
Speaker 1: sleep whatever whatever. Hey shout out to all the geminis. Hey,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something. Don't think y'all can do that,
Speaker 1: like Faith did, bring nig and talking about you in
Speaker 1: the house. Probably her house. All them damn kids that
Speaker 1: nigga own. He can't own no property or nothing because
Speaker 1: the damn text man and child support man coming. It's
Speaker 1: probably her house and he's concerned about her having a
Speaker 1: niggin by. He's seeking spouse of support. From what I understand, Listen,
Speaker 1: I'm not against that because men have to take care
Speaker 1: of women all the time, like whoever has the most money,
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah blah blah. You know, they really
Speaker 1: weren't married that long for him to be trying to
Speaker 1: three years, that's not long enough. Nigga, You forty something
Speaker 1: years old. Damn they're fifties. So now I'm having to
Speaker 1: pay because I was married to you for three years
Speaker 1: and you're used to some lifestyle after three years, I
Speaker 1: gotta help you keep up with that's some bullshit. He's
Speaker 1: not gonna get that. They don't even have no kids together.
Speaker 1: He's not gonna get that. Did you see right? Well?
Speaker 1: I hope he gets a little a little bit. You
Speaker 1: really hope he does that to Faith. She knew who
Speaker 1: the funk he was before she married his friends. They
Speaker 1: really thought they probably was going to be together forever,
Speaker 1: you know, because that's the whole ching you gotta, you
Speaker 1: gotta During that time, everybody was watching love and hip hop,
Speaker 1: but you weren't watching, you know what I'm like, You
Speaker 1: didn't see how doing Josh. Look, you know, I'm light skinned.
Speaker 1: Bitches think that the exception, but you ain't no exception.
Speaker 1: But you gonna dog right, it's gonna be the same ship, right.
Speaker 1: He want a light skin now, he wants a spou
Speaker 1: he wants he wants to check now. So I mean,
Speaker 1: I feel you know, sorry, Faith, we love you, but
Speaker 1: that's how a cookie curl sometimes. Alright, moving right along, No,
Speaker 1: let's go to a commercial, bitch, let's face some bills.
Speaker 1: He'd be right back. What's out with Tristan? Now? He's
Speaker 1: wilding out? Okay, did you read the fucking Tristan throw
Speaker 1: that Dick Thompson and his back at it again. He's
Speaker 1: so fine, he said, he about to be unemployed, so
Speaker 1: you ain't gonna get no money, but to a millionaire,
Speaker 1: I'm getting something every month. He is terrible. You know,
Speaker 1: every day I see future in a different light. It's
Speaker 1: just something that's a little worse than a lot worse,
Speaker 1: a lot worse. Poor clothes. You want to pay her.
Speaker 1: My thing is so you want to you want to
Speaker 1: keep the millionaire, but you want to keep impregnant in
Speaker 1: all these regular women and then trying to force them
Speaker 1: to have an abortion. My thing with men and abortions, like, nigga,
Speaker 1: don't suggest nothing to me. If I decided to have
Speaker 1: an abortion, that's gonna sucking me. You don't have to
Speaker 1: deal with this ship even with a morning after playing
Speaker 1: b pill. Like you don't have to deal with the
Speaker 1: after effects of having to take the pill. You don't
Speaker 1: have to deal with the emotional and physical ship you're
Speaker 1: gonna go through after having abortion. Don't suggest a motherfucking
Speaker 1: thing to me now. But I have taken the seventy
Speaker 1: five dollars because this nigga said he don't want a
Speaker 1: baby and we had four weeks. Absolutely the fuck, Like,
Speaker 1: I'm not into forcing anybody to do some ship they
Speaker 1: don't want to do. But that baby is in you. First, Nigga,
Speaker 1: I would have been like a hundred fifty extra yes,
Speaker 1: a hundred fifty double it bit outside an NDA and
Speaker 1: going about my fucking business. But you're not about to
Speaker 1: play me via text like that, like who are you
Speaker 1: talking to? And I'm pretty sure why I think I did.
Speaker 1: They show up images of well, maybe that girl wanted
Speaker 1: to be a mom. You never know, like what if
Speaker 1: she never could get the future? The girl who were
Speaker 1: not the last woman, but the Haitian girl who had
Speaker 1: the baby for the future. I forgot her name from Miami.
Speaker 1: She was like, you know, I'm thirty six years old.
Speaker 1: I've never been pregnant. Now I'm pregnant. The doctor said,
Speaker 1: like this could be like a high risk pregnancy. Who's
Speaker 1: to say I would ever be able to get pregnant again.
Speaker 1: I'm keeping my fucking kid right. Furthermore, just somebody even
Speaker 1: sucking raw for how long? Forever? She said her in
Speaker 1: future I had never used the condom. We also know
Speaker 1: that Tristan on me using the goddamn condoms. He don't
Speaker 1: use no condoms. It's clear he don't be using it.
Speaker 1: He's sucking the trainer wrong. You're just sucking everybody wrong.
Speaker 1: You don't give a damn dog as a woman, as
Speaker 1: a woman as Chloe, and he finds his hell. I
Speaker 1: probably would have gave something too, but I would I
Speaker 1: just listen. I know this come up every week, but
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say it again this week. Y'all. Just use condoms, y'all.
Speaker 1: What the fuck is wrong? Right? You don't gotta have
Speaker 1: these niggas baby down. You don't have to have amortion.
Speaker 1: You can't use the condom. Yeah, he Chloe, he busting
Speaker 1: in that thing. He probably ain't got no control. He'd
Speaker 1: probably be in there like he like really hang in
Speaker 1: these women and then saying ship like heading sandy fire
Speaker 1: racks like that's some expensive ass nuts. Just use the
Speaker 1: cond yeah, yeah, a box of what's some skin condoms? Day,
Speaker 1: like eleven ninety nine bro eleven dollars an sid You
Speaker 1: could have saved seventy four thousand, nine hundred nine and
Speaker 1: nine note nine hundred eighty nine dollars if you just
Speaker 1: bought a box of Countos stupid ass. I hope she
Speaker 1: keeps that baby, and I hope Chloe leave your ass
Speaker 1: because you don't deserve to be with nobody right now,
Speaker 1: absolutely until you get your ship together. But you keep
Speaker 1: them how you get them? Sorry, Chloe. Ye oh, and
Speaker 1: she stole him from somebody. Remember his other his first
Speaker 1: child's mom. She was pregnant. She was pregnant with that
Speaker 1: kid when he got with Chloe. Mm hmm. So hey,
Speaker 1: and we already know that family. Maybe they definitely snatch
Speaker 1: your nigga up. But the thing I noticed about them,
Speaker 1: they can't keep no nigger. That pussy wax his hell
Speaker 1: over there. They're going to get white men now, they're
Speaker 1: going to get like white rock rocker dudes. That's the
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go get me one. I'm gonna go get
Speaker 1: me one too, with the skims outfit. I'm gonna give
Speaker 1: me some scams, and I'm gonna get me a white
Speaker 1: rocker boy with the tattoos and ship like the cool
Speaker 1: white boys. They're going to get like some white boysencies
Speaker 1: it's what they're trying to do. Like it's like with
Speaker 1: all the cool but not all the you know, generational trauma.
Speaker 1: Tristan Jamaican. You know here a whole whole lot here
Speaker 1: girl buy he ain't got no choice. And Chloe like,
Speaker 1: how do you think you can have that? Fin ask
Speaker 1: man like that he ain't gonna nobody. Come on, man,
Speaker 1: he's you know what kind of it's not even the
Speaker 1: fucking other people? Is the how you do it? I
Speaker 1: want you to. It was so smooth at like doing
Speaker 1: like how what's his name, Lebron? Yeah, Lebron, That's what
Speaker 1: I'm talking about doing like Lebron. It's not cheating on Savannah.
Speaker 1: Fine ass. I don't believe that they're both cheating on
Speaker 1: each other. They got sign people believe that happily happily
Speaker 1: leave that? Who said that? Who said that? I don't
Speaker 1: believe that. I'm trying to go with both of y'all.
Speaker 1: That's how you try to put that narrative out there
Speaker 1: because you're trying to snatch like you're trying to be there.
Speaker 1: I love Savannah, Yes, I love Savannah Ward and Lebron.
Speaker 1: I don't know. She seems like we could be good friends.
Speaker 1: I do her hair, we go shopping, she eat my
Speaker 1: people like sounds so good. I'm joking, Savannah, unless you
Speaker 1: win it. These are jokes, guys, don't be bad? Is
Speaker 1: that inappropriate? Do you care? Inappropriate? So? What the hell
Speaker 1: we talk about today? Job? No, let's let's pay in
Speaker 1: a one more bill before we get into the thick
Speaker 1: of one. It's gonna change another another one. Okay, y'all,
Speaker 1: we're back now. I bought this book over the weekend because,
Speaker 1: as I told y'all in the beginning, I'm going through
Speaker 1: a little heartache. Oh this man. So I bought this
Speaker 1: book and it's called Getting Over Him and Back to You,
Speaker 1: and it's by Kindled. If you ladies are going through
Speaker 1: a breakup of any sort, please buy this little book
Speaker 1: and you can. It's gonna ask us a couple of questions,
Speaker 1: and well asked quite a few questions. We're just gonna
Speaker 1: answer a couple all of them. A j actually recently
Speaker 1: went through a split, and I want her to answer
Speaker 1: these questions. And we're gonna be it with you guys,
Speaker 1: and then you guys can like pause us and do
Speaker 1: it yourself, you know beforehand, like why like I know
Speaker 1: you because I want you to be vulnerable. I don't
Speaker 1: want you to prepare. Yeah, I know me too. Let's
Speaker 1: cry together. I'm a real nigga, man, I can't be crying. Well,
Speaker 1: let's cry. It ain't two yet. Let's cry it all
Speaker 1: out now so we can be good for the new year.
Speaker 1: Damn it. All right. So it stars and says you're
Speaker 1: crying is stressed out over a man that won't even
Speaker 1: be your type anymore once you level up and become
Speaker 1: your highest self. And there's a mm hmmm, and it's
Speaker 1: a picture woman and then she's her body is stretched
Speaker 1: up and her chin is to the sky and it's
Speaker 1: like butterflies floating from her chest. So now look at
Speaker 1: me asking right quick. Because I always tell my niece
Speaker 1: that the niggas you're fucking now, they're not gonna be
Speaker 1: able to see your pussy thirty years old. When you
Speaker 1: get thirty like these same type of guys, you're not
Speaker 1: gonna be interested in him. So keep them regrets to
Speaker 1: him and him and go ahead. All right. So the
Speaker 1: first question, oh my god, you wait, wait, wait, are
Speaker 1: you gonna be answering these fucking questions too? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna answer them first. Okay, we'll see. Oh, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna answer this one first, all right. Alright, So it
Speaker 1: says what attracted me to him. What did I find
Speaker 1: attractive about him? So I'm gonna tell y'all. I'm at
Speaker 1: this nigga in the club. I was in his section.
Speaker 1: He was sitting on the top of the chair, and
Speaker 1: he was looking all shiny's brown, his hairs are curly,
Speaker 1: and he smiled, and his smile just like lit up
Speaker 1: the whole club. I was like, damn, he fine as hell,
Speaker 1: looking like a fucking Boston here. That was my initial attraction. Okay,
Speaker 1: let's see. So I met my ex through his sister,
Speaker 1: Actually met his sister at a wedding, and she hooked
Speaker 1: me up with her brother, right and I was going
Speaker 1: through a bunch of ship, almost went to prison right before.
Speaker 1: I just thought it was gonna be a solid fucking
Speaker 1: hook up. Right, So when I met him, I met
Speaker 1: the very next day. We link up. We go to um,
Speaker 1: this little spot in Charlotte, actually two different little spots,
Speaker 1: and like little bar and all that. But I would say, um,
Speaker 1: maybe how he was dressed, Maybe because he just seemed
Speaker 1: different from men I usually date. Um, this nigger like
Speaker 1: had a headband on, like he made his shirt, he
Speaker 1: made his shirt that he was wearing. Um, he just
Speaker 1: seemed like real manly, that's what attracted me to him initially,
Speaker 1: um and creative. Manly and creative, I would say, that's
Speaker 1: what attracted me to him. And we had conversation. Our
Speaker 1: conversation was always like a big thing we would live.
Speaker 1: When we first started talking, we would literally like set
Speaker 1: time aside to talk. Okay, it says you will attract
Speaker 1: all types of men. Your level of self esteem, voids
Speaker 1: and unhealed traumas will determine who you are attracted to.
Speaker 1: Now that right there. I always say you date based
Speaker 1: on your self esteem. And like I said, at the time,
Speaker 1: I was going through a bunch of ships, you know,
Speaker 1: so my self esteem may not have been as high
Speaker 1: as it could have been when I meant him as
Speaker 1: it should have been. I don't know if mine and
Speaker 1: mine is still as high as it should be. You know,
Speaker 1: I don't feel like it. That's the date, have you? Uh?
Speaker 1: Mary J. Blige new song good Morning, Gorgeous Doe. I'll
Speaker 1: be playing that ship to myself. That's a whole anthem.
Speaker 1: I'll be singing it. Yeah, And she said, I ain't
Speaker 1: talking about makeup and hair done. I'm talking about right
Speaker 1: when you wake up, bitch, how you look when you
Speaker 1: wake up crusty, crusty, I slove down the side of
Speaker 1: your mouth. Good morning, gorgeous. Yes, you got to speak
Speaker 1: to yourself. You gotta learn how to speak that to yourself.
Speaker 1: Even if and say it to you believe it. Even
Speaker 1: if you're looking in the mirror you be like I'm
Speaker 1: ugly right now. Still say it to yourself till you
Speaker 1: believe it. So next question, you're gonna answer this one. Okay,
Speaker 1: some voids he may have feeled for me were at
Speaker 1: that time, I hadn't had sex for like a year,
Speaker 1: so he did feel the dick void with some real
Speaker 1: good dick, like soul snatching dick. Uh, what else can
Speaker 1: we see? Just having somebody I know would show up
Speaker 1: for me, You know what I'm saying, Like somebody can
Speaker 1: depend on he feeled. He feeled that I like people
Speaker 1: I can depend on. I may stay with somebody too
Speaker 1: long because I made may become I don't want to
Speaker 1: stay co dependent. But it's just hard to find people
Speaker 1: you know you can depend on. And I think a
Speaker 1: lot of women experienced that. Like you're working with somebody
Speaker 1: you can't even call in the state of emergency. I
Speaker 1: could call him, no matter even if you know, even
Speaker 1: in the beginning stages where I wasn't sure why our
Speaker 1: relationship was going at, I could still depend on him.
Speaker 1: So I feel like maybe that's one thing I think
Speaker 1: for me, it was something similar to that. You know,
Speaker 1: I was really at that time when we met, living
Speaker 1: from hand the mouth where I was like paying everything
Speaker 1: out and just just very hustling. I didn't have any
Speaker 1: safety net, and he definitely was a safety net for me,
Speaker 1: especially financially, like you know, if I needed it, he
Speaker 1: would give it to me. And I didn't abuse that,
Speaker 1: you know, but he was there then. He was my
Speaker 1: smoke partner, Like anybody who know me, no, I love
Speaker 1: me some good old ah and that was yeah, that
Speaker 1: was that was my smoke partner. And we just would
Speaker 1: have a lot of fun together. So I think he
Speaker 1: feels those boys that I had, like the type of
Speaker 1: men I had been dating, they were like that would
Speaker 1: be great with this, but missing that. Like I was
Speaker 1: dating this one guy and he was so cool and
Speaker 1: he was successful and you know he was a helpmate,
Speaker 1: but um, he was a bitch as nigga. Like remember
Speaker 1: I had Diamonds, my dog. She was a child about
Speaker 1: four pounds soaking with I let her out the cage
Speaker 1: and he was like, I can't. You have to get
Speaker 1: the funk out of our house because this is my
Speaker 1: me and my doghouse, bitch. Right. Oh but the smoke,
Speaker 1: like I wasn't smoking like that prior to me in
Speaker 1: my ex and we started I started smoking with him,
Speaker 1: and you know, needed sex, like I can understand, like
Speaker 1: Bobby and with me, like you do your drug a
Speaker 1: choice together with whoever and then having sex with it.
Speaker 1: It just it's something spiritual that happens, man. It really,
Speaker 1: it's some type of some type of bond. Something happens
Speaker 1: when you be um having sex under the influence like
Speaker 1: that a lot, Like it's planned into y'all activity, right,
Speaker 1: and that should make you connected on a cellular level
Speaker 1: or something else. Yeah, Like I can feel you when
Speaker 1: you're not around me. I can smell you when you're
Speaker 1: not around me, like I can. I can think about
Speaker 1: that dick going in and feel it. You ever been
Speaker 1: like that, like just like like a little something just
Speaker 1: come over you right quick. No, I ain't never felt
Speaker 1: the dick when the dick y'all. If y'all felt this,
Speaker 1: send us a message if y'all. If y'all have ever
Speaker 1: been just driving to work one morning and you think
Speaker 1: about a session you had with that one man and
Speaker 1: you just get like this little tingling thing. Now, I
Speaker 1: don't get butterflies. I'm thinking about it, but I don't
Speaker 1: never felt no imaginary dick. No, I feel like I'm
Speaker 1: coming a little bit. Oh No, you got like for real,
Speaker 1: something different. It's like like a little all right, next question.
Speaker 1: Breaking up with him made me feel like Um. Breaking
Speaker 1: up with him made me feal Um, I don't know,
Speaker 1: like some days I could breathe easier, less stressed. Um,
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ girl. Breaking up with him made me feel sad.
Speaker 1: You know I feel sadness. Um, I feel hopeful. I
Speaker 1: still have hope to find something beautiful in the future
Speaker 1: if I can love him the way I did. I
Speaker 1: know that I'm capable of that, and I'm grateful that
Speaker 1: he showed me that I'm capable of that. And the
Speaker 1: Lord will see me somebody that we're talking about the
Speaker 1: law of today, I hear that I feel resentful because
Speaker 1: I feel like I spent a lot of time. I
Speaker 1: gave a lot of time away for nothing. Um. I
Speaker 1: think that's a woman thing. I don't think men feel
Speaker 1: resentful when they break up with us. I don't think
Speaker 1: the way we calculate our time, men don't do that.
Speaker 1: Men don't count up like I guess because sometimes it's
Speaker 1: usually should happen to the happening to the woman. Or
Speaker 1: maybe that's just how we feel, maybe we aren't taking
Speaker 1: accountability for the roles we may have played and whatever.
Speaker 1: But we do definitely calculate time up on a nigga,
Speaker 1: like I could have been doing this in this amount
Speaker 1: of time, or I could have been with so and so,
Speaker 1: like we definitely and that causes you to keep one
Speaker 1: foot at the door when you when you're always thinking
Speaker 1: about what it should have could have on a nigga.
Speaker 1: So I do have a lot of I have more
Speaker 1: resentment towards myself, though I really don't have a lot
Speaker 1: of resentment towards him, because when things happen in a relationship,
Speaker 1: I'd be like, man, what the fund is it about
Speaker 1: me that makes you think you could play with me
Speaker 1: like this? Like? What is it about me that makes
Speaker 1: you think you could talk to me like this? What
Speaker 1: it is about me to make you think you? Don't?
Speaker 1: It be their ship? Right? But but you would not
Speaker 1: have allowed that thing to happen had you been different.
Speaker 1: Do you see what I'm saying? I felt Another thing
Speaker 1: I felt was devalued, like I wasn't enough. Um, I
Speaker 1: think that's about all the feelings I had anger, no
Speaker 1: let me And I'm lying, that's when I felt like mad,
Speaker 1: like I want to hurt this nigger the way I'm hurting. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's some real ship. I guess that's the difference
Speaker 1: between me when I break up with When I break
Speaker 1: up with somebody, I just be like, like, if you different,
Speaker 1: now is for the next woman. I don't mind giving
Speaker 1: a woman to refurbished that nigger, like I went through
Speaker 1: all this ship, so y'all can have a great relationship.
Speaker 1: That's just really how I feel about it. Um. I
Speaker 1: guess it's different. I don't know. So maybe it's different
Speaker 1: if the woman is the one who got dumped. Not
Speaker 1: saying that you're the one that got dumped, but I
Speaker 1: think women would have a different um outlook on how
Speaker 1: the relationship, like what transpired any relationship if they weren't
Speaker 1: the one that ended it. But usually women, women are
Speaker 1: usually the ones that leave situations. And I don't be
Speaker 1: how I feel right now is just like I am
Speaker 1: skeptical of the unknown, like what's next? Am I really done? Like?
Speaker 1: Could I be back with this person? I'm just be honest.
Speaker 1: Could I be back with him a year or two
Speaker 1: from now? I could think about? I think about those things,
Speaker 1: but then what I do to make sure I keep
Speaker 1: more moving forward? As I think about all the things
Speaker 1: that happened, I ain't like like I know I didn't
Speaker 1: deserve and that keeps me from going back right. So
Speaker 1: that but leads me to this question, did he betray me?
Speaker 1: Or did I portray betray myself? In what ways did
Speaker 1: I betray myself? I feel like in my last relationship,
Speaker 1: I betrayed myself big time. That's why I said I
Speaker 1: got more resentment towards me than him because earlier on
Speaker 1: in the relationship there was a lot of things that
Speaker 1: is happening that I overlooked because I just wanted somebody,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like I felt like my
Speaker 1: connection with this person was greater than any other woman.
Speaker 1: It was great at any situation. I loved him in
Speaker 1: spite of like I know, a lot of men say
Speaker 1: like women like they're the last ones to get unconditional love,
Speaker 1: like on a scale from dogs the kids. Like, it's
Speaker 1: just not true. I think all people. We probably have
Speaker 1: more unconditional love for little humans, kids and dogs only
Speaker 1: because they show unconditional love. Back between adult humans, we
Speaker 1: don't show unconditional love. It's unconditional to a certain time period.
Speaker 1: And then it's like, you know what, this is a
Speaker 1: enough Yeah, it don't be unconditional at all as far
Speaker 1: as I'm concerned. It's full of condition. Yeah, And I
Speaker 1: just feel like, um, I definitely went against my intuition.
Speaker 1: I went against what I knew I wanted. I went
Speaker 1: against uh um what I knew, Like, you know, this
Speaker 1: is this is this isn't this isn't what I deserve.
Speaker 1: I don't deserve to begin treated like this. And I
Speaker 1: stayed until those things stopped. But then when they stopped,
Speaker 1: it's like it's too fucking late, like it's so much damaged.
Speaker 1: I don't went through Now, I don't like you, right,
Speaker 1: That's where I ended up at. So and it's not
Speaker 1: because and and it's really some days I don't like
Speaker 1: myself because I list somebody play with me like this, Yeah, same,
Speaker 1: I can't even I wouldn't even my situation. I wouldn't
Speaker 1: even say he betrayed me. I betrayed myself because I
Speaker 1: just really believe, like them light skinned bitches, that I
Speaker 1: could change this. I want my damny lee she but
Speaker 1: you're not a light skin I thought I was, y'all,
Speaker 1: and I just I played. I played myself. Congratulations, shorty,
Speaker 1: you played yourself. That's how I did. It was me.
Speaker 1: You know, I can't even blame him because he didn't
Speaker 1: make me no promises. It was me trying to turn
Speaker 1: him into what I want to happen. I knew you've
Speaker 1: seen those posts online that said, if a woman really
Speaker 1: loves you, shoot a lot of herself. Mm hmmm. That
Speaker 1: and for a man to create that, I'm assuming a
Speaker 1: man created that post. That's some real nasty ship, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. Because we we will do that,
Speaker 1: we'll see the brighter side of everything, like we'll see
Speaker 1: some ship in you that you don't even see, and
Speaker 1: we'll fall in love with your potential or the potential.
Speaker 1: And that was the relationship, and right I'll turned it
Speaker 1: I turned into and at least bit at least he
Speaker 1: paid my bills. At least I ain't got about no weed.
Speaker 1: At least he keep me dripped. I will don't be
Speaker 1: an at least bitch. You are not an at least bitch.
Speaker 1: You are the standard ladies. Stop being the at least bit.
Speaker 1: Promise in two I won't be at least nothing. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be the most bitch, not the least period.
Speaker 1: Al says the way you love him can make him
Speaker 1: seem more special than what he really is him withholding
Speaker 1: his love can make it seem like you're really missing
Speaker 1: out on something, but you're not. M boo all right?
Speaker 1: Why am I finding it so hard to let him go?
Speaker 1: Um so again, it would be the same thing. It's
Speaker 1: the it's the just dependability, just the having somebody you
Speaker 1: know who's gonna show up for you. You know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. I'm saying that I grew up as a
Speaker 1: child who just never had anybody show up for me
Speaker 1: or like, I don't know, I it's just hard to
Speaker 1: find people you can depend on. It that's just I
Speaker 1: mean with your mate, family for ends, it's hard to find.
Speaker 1: And I'm a dependable person, like I'm gonna come through
Speaker 1: for you, and I feel like, you know more, My
Speaker 1: thing isn't he was very dependable. But my thing that
Speaker 1: makes it hard for me to let go is I
Speaker 1: don't really I have trouble connecting with people, with men
Speaker 1: on a deeper level. It takes me a long time
Speaker 1: for me to feel comfortable. Can I like, can I
Speaker 1: be around you with my wig off? Can I just
Speaker 1: feel beautiful when I don't feel beautiful around you? Like
Speaker 1: I just I would miss like holding all I like.
Speaker 1: I'm so I'm a nurturer, So I like caressing and
Speaker 1: hugging and rubbing. I'm gonna miss all that ship. Well,
Speaker 1: I guess I can do that with the next nigga.
Speaker 1: But I don't be wanting to the next nigga. I
Speaker 1: don't be like, get off of me, motherfucker. Yeah. But
Speaker 1: every reason why you may feel that way is because
Speaker 1: you haven't let the connection go up with this person.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. If you don't have yourself
Speaker 1: open to receiving that type of love from somebody else,
Speaker 1: it don't never happen. If you keep saving space for him,
Speaker 1: it's never gonna happen. Bitch. I need to write a
Speaker 1: motherfucker book. I need to finish right in a motherfucking book.
Speaker 1: How about that, like, you're not even you're not even
Speaker 1: opening yourself up to the possibilities of being able to
Speaker 1: get somebody else to do those things with because you
Speaker 1: save space for this fucking nigga that's just unattainable. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, and then here's this is the last question
Speaker 1: now because I don't want to do the whole this
Speaker 1: bitch whole book. And then she coming to us in
Speaker 1: what ways did he bring out the worst in me? Y'all?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you, I know I'd be joking on
Speaker 1: here a lot. I'd be saying, like how I'm gonna
Speaker 1: fight people and stuff like I am a real live fighter.
Speaker 1: If I feel disrespected, if I feel like I don't
Speaker 1: have a choice, like I'm a fight and I don't
Speaker 1: want to though, so if I keep if we keep
Speaker 1: getting to these things, that makes me feel like like
Speaker 1: I want to attack you, like why why why are
Speaker 1: you doing these things to me? Like and there I
Speaker 1: believe there is a reset button on the top of
Speaker 1: a nigger's head, like for real, you just gotta jump
Speaker 1: up there like the damn Jordan jumped manote. We are
Speaker 1: here and we talked back. We do not promote domestic violence.
Speaker 1: You g so that is one of the things he
Speaker 1: would bring out of me. No, I don't want I
Speaker 1: don't want to be with anyone. I don't want to
Speaker 1: be with any man that I can easily disrespect. So
Speaker 1: I felt that I was getting to a point of
Speaker 1: being very disrespectful, um because I just didn't care anymore.
Speaker 1: I don't care about your feelings. I didn't care about
Speaker 1: how you felt because I felt for the longest you
Speaker 1: didn't give a funk about how I was feeling. So
Speaker 1: now I'm just like, really a nasty bitch, and I
Speaker 1: am not a nasty bitch. So I don't want to
Speaker 1: be with anybody that brings Dad out of me. Megan
Speaker 1: the Stallion, she was on to Rogi p Henson Show.
Speaker 1: I think it's a podcast, but she wo was talking
Speaker 1: about party and she was saying, how you know and
Speaker 1: her all her other relationships. She was more about like
Speaker 1: the physical or whatever. Right, But she was like, man, man,
Speaker 1: my boyfriend, he really take care of my mental health.
Speaker 1: And I felt sad here and that because I want that,
Speaker 1: like I want somebody, Like the world is so fucking
Speaker 1: crazy outside the walls, y'all in when I come in
Speaker 1: here like this supposed to be my fucking safe space.
Speaker 1: I should. I'm supposed to be able to cry, You're
Speaker 1: supposed to be able to console me. We console each other.
Speaker 1: I'm supposed to make you laugh. We're supposed to make
Speaker 1: each other feel good. You're supposed to speak love, life,
Speaker 1: and light into each other. If that's not happening, and
Speaker 1: I'm just a maniac with you, I don't need to
Speaker 1: be with you. But I feel like a lot of
Speaker 1: men are literally sons of bitches like y'all were raised
Speaker 1: by women, um who were probably verbally abusive, did have
Speaker 1: time for you at work. You have a lot of
Speaker 1: resentment towards the women that raise you. So you get
Speaker 1: with women and the only way you feel love is
Speaker 1: when I'm cussing, screaming, yelling, and kicking your ass, because
Speaker 1: that's how you, that's you. You have a fucked up
Speaker 1: sense of like what love is to me, love is
Speaker 1: taking somebody else's life into consideration as if it's your own.
Speaker 1: I don't want to fight me, I don't want to
Speaker 1: cuss me. I want to talk nice to me. I
Speaker 1: want to talk nice to you. Yeah, But if I'm
Speaker 1: I'm continuously put into situations where I have to be demeaning,
Speaker 1: and I saying I have to be. But I guess
Speaker 1: that's a defense mechanism a lot of the times because
Speaker 1: I can't even say that he was real. Um, I
Speaker 1: know my my fucking levels go from zero tell hundred,
Speaker 1: and that's one thing I'd be working on. I just
Speaker 1: need somebody that cares about my mental health to where
Speaker 1: I never have to get to five. I never have
Speaker 1: to get to sixty. It's just I can talk to them.
Speaker 1: They're not talking to me and trying to confuse me,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Like I feel like a
Speaker 1: lot of times people gas like you mm hm, oh,
Speaker 1: it's not that serious. How do you upset someone and
Speaker 1: then tell them the severity of it? Like it ain't
Speaker 1: even that serious. You can't tell me the severity of
Speaker 1: a situation that pissed me the funk off. So now
Speaker 1: here we are. But yeah, I don't want uh, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't like how it was in that relationship. I um,
Speaker 1: Like I said earlier, you know, I turned into this
Speaker 1: at least bitch, and I made excuses for why this
Speaker 1: was okay, And this is just something to hold me
Speaker 1: till I find where God has for me. But God
Speaker 1: is not gonna send me. But he asked for me
Speaker 1: while I'm still holding on this ship. You know. So
Speaker 1: I think that was the worst of it out. I
Speaker 1: minimized myself m in this relationship because it's satisfied some
Speaker 1: of my knees, but not the most important ones, you know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: So is your love language still gifts? Yeah? That ain't changed. Yeah,
Speaker 1: some thing's never changed. Yeah, this ship got deep. Y'all
Speaker 1: know I was a philosopher, these niggas. He I just
Speaker 1: feel like, you know, he might have used my love
Speaker 1: language to manipulate me in ways sometimes you know, like
Speaker 1: or you use your love language to manipulate allowed it. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was like, look at this, ysel bag. This ain't
Speaker 1: nothing but the devil. Ain't it cute? Girl? No, that's
Speaker 1: what you would say that girl. That man loved me. Girl.
Speaker 1: Look where you got me that I distinctively remember last
Speaker 1: year your birthday. He was like, girl, that man love me. Girl,
Speaker 1: look at this, but listen, just because somebody could buy
Speaker 1: you some ship, that does not mean they love you.
Speaker 1: They just can afford this ship you like. But let's
Speaker 1: let's let's also add this in there. You cannot negate
Speaker 1: how someone loves. So that's why I always say, you
Speaker 1: just have to find somebody with the same definition of
Speaker 1: love as you, because just because somebody's not loving you
Speaker 1: the way you think they should love you doesn't mean
Speaker 1: they don't love you. That's just how they love. So
Speaker 1: him even buying you things like he probably that that
Speaker 1: is that's that's how he shows love, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. So you just have to identify how you
Speaker 1: want to really be loved, Like, is him buying me
Speaker 1: gifts how I want to be loved? It's not like,
Speaker 1: that's how it is how I want to be loved,
Speaker 1: And that's why we made it as far as we did.
Speaker 1: But it's not the only way I want to be loved.
Speaker 1: Their secondary and third positions to my love languages that
Speaker 1: need to be needs to be able to weave through
Speaker 1: all five and how many other love languages we can
Speaker 1: come up with, Like, Yeah, because why is sex not
Speaker 1: a love language? I guess that falls under physical touch. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because sex is definitely um a way of communicating I mean,
Speaker 1: not having good sex, like I won't talk to you
Speaker 1: verbally and see the thing, that thing that never failed
Speaker 1: all the way to the end. The sex is bomb.
Speaker 1: You know, that was never a problem. It's just everything else,
Speaker 1: all right. So it says trust that he is not
Speaker 1: as good as it gets. Trust that you can love
Speaker 1: again and then it can be better than the love
Speaker 1: you're letting go. Mhm. And I want to believe that
Speaker 1: so hard, but I'm challenged by it because I just
Speaker 1: be looking in that like my mom and their friends,
Speaker 1: and and just wom older women that I do their hair,
Speaker 1: and they never they never have a man again, but
Speaker 1: they'd be content though, they'd be fulfilling themselves and they'd
Speaker 1: be happy. So they say, you know, I don't know
Speaker 1: if they are for real, but they seem to be happy.
Speaker 1: But I don't want to be happy by myself. I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want to be happy about myself. Y'all listen
Speaker 1: if y'all trying to distinguish who's to Tammy got the
Speaker 1: granny pussy voice, but she got the bomb pussy though,
Speaker 1: calling what you want and I'm gonna get you one
Speaker 1: to get one sound like your auntie, damn man, I
Speaker 1: don't know. Um. I'm not afraid to be alone, and
Speaker 1: I feel like the earlier women learn how to be
Speaker 1: alone own and love themselves the better it is. It's
Speaker 1: hard to be by yourself, but once you get comfortable
Speaker 1: being with you. That's why that song Marj blinst song
Speaker 1: is so good. This is a fifty sum yeo woman
Speaker 1: who has finally learned that she's the ship. For How
Speaker 1: long was she questioned herself because of the treatment she
Speaker 1: was receiving from men like we already need these fucking
Speaker 1: men to validate who the funk we are. If you
Speaker 1: searching outside yourself to determine who you are, you gonna
Speaker 1: be lost forever. And um, but I don't. I don't
Speaker 1: feel like. I feel like I am finding myself more
Speaker 1: as a woman. The older I get, right, and I'm
Speaker 1: getting more in tune with who I am and what
Speaker 1: I want. But I do want a nigger though, And
Speaker 1: I feel like, even though this relationship is ending, I
Speaker 1: felt like I've been alone the whole time, you know,
Speaker 1: And I don't feel like I've really had no bout
Speaker 1: That should be. That should then make it easier for
Speaker 1: you to sadvertise if you already felt a known while
Speaker 1: in a relationship, that means you're you're single in a
Speaker 1: relationship essentially, right, It shouldn't you should never think that
Speaker 1: you could not get another situation at least comparable to
Speaker 1: that one. No. See, that's the thing. I don't want
Speaker 1: that again, That's what I'm saying, Like, I don't want
Speaker 1: to do that. But could you imagine another year going
Speaker 1: by and you're still going through the same thing. That's
Speaker 1: what you don't want, Like you don't want another tall
Speaker 1: month to that. No, I can't do it. But then
Speaker 1: that's that would be a motivation to keep putting yourself first. Um,
Speaker 1: but I just don't want to look up and I'm
Speaker 1: forty something and just just still find going to happen.
Speaker 1: That's not gonna happen. You could be in a relationship
Speaker 1: with somebody tomorrow if you wanted to be, and you
Speaker 1: know that. I know that, like I know that about myself.
Speaker 1: I really want to get married tomorrow. I know a
Speaker 1: couple of things that are marry me. But I don't
Speaker 1: just want to marry because they want me. But you can,
Speaker 1: you can want them to. You just wasn't opening yourself
Speaker 1: up to even wanting because you were with Mr uh Intangible,
Speaker 1: Mr Big exactly, so you weren't even you don't even
Speaker 1: know if you could love these people. You don't even
Speaker 1: know if you could like these people because you just
Speaker 1: wasn't open to it. Didn't you realize the nigga like
Speaker 1: super Dope, you just wasn't paying attention to his ass
Speaker 1: he could happen. I'm not scaring lit an optimistic bitch.
Speaker 1: I haven't seen a couple of my niggas on shading
Speaker 1: in the past. You know your problem. Why are you
Speaker 1: fucking niggas in the shade room like Brad. That's what
Speaker 1: I had to log logs off that made your figs.
Speaker 1: That's a problem. There was never mind, or maybe I
Speaker 1: was project assholes. Oh ship, all right, I'm not all right.
Speaker 1: We're not gonna ask y'all no more questions from this book,
Speaker 1: but you should. If you're going through something similar as
Speaker 1: me and a j you should go ahead and grab
Speaker 1: This book is called Getting Over Him and Back to You.
Speaker 1: It's by Kendall d And it's a journal, right, So
Speaker 1: the questions are laid out and then it has space
Speaker 1: for you to write your answers in. You know, you
Speaker 1: don't have to do them over a fucking podcast for
Speaker 1: the world to criticize you like us. You could just
Speaker 1: do it by yourself. So y'all get that book. It's
Speaker 1: it's really cute and it's I think it's to help
Speaker 1: you heal. We're gonna see what to do for me
Speaker 1: and A J A J. You want one of these?
Speaker 1: How bo? You want to check it out? You know,
Speaker 1: I actually went through break up counseling. I a therapist
Speaker 1: for breaking up. That's that's healthy. So this is why
Speaker 1: I'm trying to stick to my things. Now. If my
Speaker 1: ax happens to listen to this episode and he'll understand
Speaker 1: why it's so hard to get me back. Yeah, because
Speaker 1: so do you really try to get her in mind right?
Speaker 1: And when you got your mind right, ship just don't slide. Yeah,
Speaker 1: me too. I'm really trying this time. Like, and I'll y'all,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you all this. I'm broke up with
Speaker 1: this nick about seventeen times, like you don't even know
Speaker 1: it's been had in the game and look how you Meanwhile,
Speaker 1: we put my whole life on the line, child, put
Speaker 1: all the business out there and even out here flexing.
Speaker 1: This time. I'm really done, y'all, I think, And I
Speaker 1: would be like, did you remember you remember you said
Speaker 1: you were done? Right? Tune in an episode forty four.
Speaker 1: Bit when you said you was done, I'm gonna replay
Speaker 1: it for you, because clearly you forgot an episode forty seven.
Speaker 1: I remember it's forty seven. Y'all were coming up on
Speaker 1: our one year anniversary. Yes, I'm playing it. I'm playing
Speaker 1: something for us a j We're gonna do it. We're
Speaker 1: gonna celebrate, y'all coming, y'all better pull up? What else
Speaker 1: we got? Oh, we got a dumb bitch story. Dumb
Speaker 1: bitch stories because we've all been a dumb bitch at
Speaker 1: least once or twice. Okay, here, guys, hey, guys, here's
Speaker 1: our dumb bach story of the week. All right. This
Speaker 1: came from a Instagram follower. Uh I won't tell you
Speaker 1: her name because it's anonymous. Um says, I actually have
Speaker 1: plenty of dumbing stories regarding the same nigga. But here's
Speaker 1: one of the funniest. So me and my so, me
Speaker 1: and my man had just moved into our first spot
Speaker 1: together on uh ten five, two thou eighteen. It was
Speaker 1: my first time moving out of my mom's house and
Speaker 1: I was twenty one years old. We when we moved
Speaker 1: in together, we were not officially together. He told me
Speaker 1: that once we moved in together, we could become official
Speaker 1: because he had to make sure I was ready or
Speaker 1: some dumb ship like that red f act. That ship
Speaker 1: don't even make any sense. But I was young and
Speaker 1: dumb so really didn't question it too much as I
Speaker 1: should have. On October ten, we had a conversation and
Speaker 1: made things finally official, saying that we were now in
Speaker 1: a relationship. Bitch. That was on a Wednesday. While on
Speaker 1: that Friday, literally two days later, this man did not
Speaker 1: pick me up from work in my car. My sister
Speaker 1: had to come get me. So now I'm at home
Speaker 1: in the living room looking craziest fuck up, crying, blowing
Speaker 1: his phone up with no answer. This man finally makes
Speaker 1: his entrance at two a m. And I asked him
Speaker 1: where has he been? He said, playing poker with his friends.
Speaker 1: So he's at the microwave heating up some food with
Speaker 1: his back turned to me. I get off the couch
Speaker 1: to walk down the hall, and something tells me to
Speaker 1: look at him. Why the funk was there a condom
Speaker 1: hanging out the back of this man's jeans, like just
Speaker 1: dangling there. I walked up to him and I said, Oh,
Speaker 1: where did you said you was? At again, and he
Speaker 1: repeats the same lie I snatched the con them from
Speaker 1: his jeans. In quotation, it says very much disgusting, because
Speaker 1: now I'm touching another bitches pussy juices. And I was like, well,
Speaker 1: what's this, nigga? He looked like he had just seen
Speaker 1: the ghosts. Then he looks me dead in my face,
Speaker 1: trying to look as surprised as I am, says out
Speaker 1: his dumb mouth, My friends must be playing a joke
Speaker 1: on me or something. Girl, What the fuck? Why would
Speaker 1: your friends who's thirty plus put a used condom on
Speaker 1: the back of your jeans? Nigga? I couldnt. I was
Speaker 1: about to swing, and he grabbed me, and I and
Speaker 1: bear hugged me that night. That's a night I will
Speaker 1: never forget. And then I took him back. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: how could I be so damn dumb? Fast forward three
Speaker 1: years later, we're still together. Sometimes it's very on and off,
Speaker 1: in toxic, but I do live on my own and
Speaker 1: he has his own place too. I don't put up
Speaker 1: with half the ship I used to, and I started
Speaker 1: doing me and the rolls had reversed at this point
Speaker 1: where he was now going through my ship. But that's
Speaker 1: my dumb bing story. Child. I love y'all show, Thank
Speaker 1: y'all girl. So three years later, y'all still now he
Speaker 1: now she doesn't started pulling the you. That's the thing
Speaker 1: that goes back to one of the questions, Right, why
Speaker 1: are you gonna stay with somebody to talk to guys?
Speaker 1: Situation that long to where you start being a nigga,
Speaker 1: to where you stopped giving a funk, to where you
Speaker 1: start playing with him, to where you got the comming
Speaker 1: hanging out your back pussy, your back pussy, I mean backpockets, yo, Like,
Speaker 1: why would you list like that's not natural, that's not
Speaker 1: that obviously obviously that wasn't natural for her, right, So
Speaker 1: why I stay with the naked today? They turned you
Speaker 1: into them? I'm a puller, you on you like, get
Speaker 1: the funk up out of there? Just get out of there. Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: just get out of there. It's not worth it. But
Speaker 1: that's younger going through hell hella, dumb ship. You'ren't even
Speaker 1: supposed to be like I'm not saying I do believe
Speaker 1: you're supposed to find your meat sometime in your twenties,
Speaker 1: at least a few like people, but to be in
Speaker 1: like a long term serious relationship in your twenties. I don't.
Speaker 1: It's not highly suggested from my book Living Together with
Speaker 1: a Man. No, not my daughter. Hell no, now you
Speaker 1: know what. I didn't want to do another episode on
Speaker 1: SAM one day. I want to do an episode on
Speaker 1: on Black women dating. That might be our next episode.
Speaker 1: We'll talk about that, like do we know how to date?
Speaker 1: Because why are you living with that's an attachment issue. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's very young. But some people get together and live
Speaker 1: happily ever after. You know, just a small ass ample
Speaker 1: size bitch, like just it's definitely like the size of
Speaker 1: that ship. They give you a sepphoria when you use
Speaker 1: your points. Yep, I don't want her to. I think
Speaker 1: what could happen. She could possibly finally savertize with this guy.
Speaker 1: And then you get with a nice man and then
Speaker 1: play with him all type of ways because that's what
Speaker 1: you used to. You get with someone else who's not
Speaker 1: your ex, who may be good for you, may be
Speaker 1: great for you, but you're guarded um and now you're
Speaker 1: having him experienced the ship that you went through, and
Speaker 1: then you ruin him for the next woman, and so
Speaker 1: forth and so on, and the psychle continues, Yeah, so
Speaker 1: just try to keep your I don't want to say innocence.
Speaker 1: Just try to keep your nice. Try to keep your
Speaker 1: nice to minimum. Just try to keep your nice about yourself.
Speaker 1: I don't know did she have an actually, because you're
Speaker 1: gonna look up and you're gonna be a whole nigga?
Speaker 1: Did she have a question? No? It wasn't no question.
Speaker 1: It was just a story basically how she pulled a
Speaker 1: nasty on the amount of nigga back as. I just
Speaker 1: don't know if I could, if I can handle it
Speaker 1: being that blatant in my face. Why is in the
Speaker 1: back though? That's what I'd be concerned with. Why was
Speaker 1: the condom in the back because she might not be
Speaker 1: dookey on itive and it might have been his damn
Speaker 1: me just posted it out his ass and put it
Speaker 1: on his pocket? Yo, How did it get back there? Though?
Speaker 1: That's why I was just trying to forget Jesse Smollett.
Speaker 1: I know we gotta go, but Jesse Smollett, Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: how you practice how you do a practice room for
Speaker 1: your crime is still sucking up? You know. The funny
Speaker 1: part is how you had this relationship with this nigga?
Speaker 1: Like when he was telling like how a relationship like
Speaker 1: I was like, Yo, what is happening? Listen? Don't let
Speaker 1: them distract y'all from the biggest case of the century though.
Speaker 1: That fucking gets Lae Maxi Lane. Yes, So now you
Speaker 1: you know black people love to be entertained. Y'all, Please
Speaker 1: pay attention to what the fund is happening out here
Speaker 1: because I really feel like our life depends on it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and the lives of our kids. Man, that was out here,
Speaker 1: you know, doing some awful things. Man, well look into it.
Speaker 1: But I enjoyed this episode. Talking is definitely my therapy.
Speaker 1: I don't have to talk to an actual therapists. I
Speaker 1: just need somebody that I can talk to. I just yeah,
Speaker 1: I appreciate you all for listening. And sometimes you'll send
Speaker 1: me messages judging me. Y'all know, I don't give a fuck,
Speaker 1: but I do appreciate that you even tune in, So
Speaker 1: just continue. Thank you. Right, Look, but if you guys
Speaker 1: enjoyed this episode, you know what time it is. Hit
Speaker 1: us up on We Talked Back podcast on Instagram. That's
Speaker 1: your girl a j Holiday two point oh, follow me
Speaker 1: on the Grahams and make sure you keep sending them
Speaker 1: dumbing stories. We haven't received and asked a black friend.
Speaker 1: With all the fun things that are going on amongst
Speaker 1: the black and white community right now, we haven't received
Speaker 1: any questions or any statements or anything, but y'all can
Speaker 1: send that shouldn't via Instagram or email us that we
Speaker 1: talked back po d at gmail dot com. If you
Speaker 1: want to be on the show, email that's two right,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna have some merged coming your way, you guys,
Speaker 1: So y'all stay tuned for that. We want to see
Speaker 1: you in your we talk back paraph. Yeah, it's official
Speaker 1: Tambam on Instagram. Y'all follow me there. I love y'all.
Speaker 1: Y'all have