1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:07,400 Speaker 1: Welcome to Stuff to blow your mind, a production of iHeartRadio. 2 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:15,280 Speaker 2: Good evening, and Happy Holidays. My name is doctor Anton Jess, 3 00:00:15,920 --> 00:00:22,320 Speaker 2: professor of Monster Studies here at the University. I'm broadcasting 4 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 2: once more from the University basement, where I conduct most 5 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:30,520 Speaker 2: of my research these days, far from the prying eyes 6 00:00:30,920 --> 00:00:34,479 Speaker 2: of the public, in hidden from the shapeless thing that 7 00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:39,920 Speaker 2: pursues me. I realize my missives have been infrequent of late. 8 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:44,000 Speaker 2: They may only grow more infrequent till you simply hear 9 00:00:44,159 --> 00:00:48,400 Speaker 2: from me no more. Such is life, I imagine, and 10 00:00:48,600 --> 00:00:52,479 Speaker 2: such as death. But look at me waxing morose when 11 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,400 Speaker 2: it is Christmas Eve, and I promised you a meditation 12 00:00:56,680 --> 00:01:01,200 Speaker 2: on the challenges of conquering Christmas. Yes, as you're well aware, 13 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:05,440 Speaker 2: there are those who attempted it over the centuries. I think, 14 00:01:05,480 --> 00:01:09,480 Speaker 2: of course, of the dinnizens of Mars, who, in nineteen 15 00:01:09,600 --> 00:01:14,440 Speaker 2: sixty four abducted Santa Claus and it tempted to install 16 00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:17,840 Speaker 2: him on the Red Planet in order to alter the 17 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:23,080 Speaker 2: stoic and militaristic path of their culture. Santa, of course 18 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:27,039 Speaker 2: returned to our planet, and his counterpart on the Red 19 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:30,880 Speaker 2: planet vowed oar clause rules there to this day he weeps, 20 00:01:31,080 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 2: for there are no more Martian Christmases to conquer. Yes, 21 00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:39,559 Speaker 2: I'm afraid Dropo's reign lasted only a few days. Much 22 00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 2: closer to home, but equally distant. We, of course, have 23 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 2: the conquest of Christmas within the world of the Who's 24 00:01:47,760 --> 00:01:52,920 Speaker 2: located within a single speck of dust somewhere in our world. Yes, 25 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 2: you might have forgotten about that little detail, but that's 26 00:01:55,760 --> 00:02:01,000 Speaker 2: where you'll find this particular microcosm. Don't need to recount 27 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 2: the entire story, but you know how it goes. The Grinch, 28 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:09,359 Speaker 2: much like Grendel of Olds, grew enraged in his isolated 29 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,880 Speaker 2: layer at the sights and sounds that emanated from the 30 00:02:12,919 --> 00:02:17,320 Speaker 2: heart of civilization. For the Grinch, the Christmas season posed 31 00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:20,680 Speaker 2: the greatest disruption, so he sought at first to steal it, 32 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:24,560 Speaker 2: to make off with every material precursor to holiday mirth. 33 00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:29,680 Speaker 2: But of course Christmas came just the same, and that's 34 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:34,760 Speaker 2: when the Grinch pivoted in his approach. Yes, he saved Christmas, 35 00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:38,760 Speaker 2: granted from himself, and was quickly installed at the head 36 00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:42,960 Speaker 2: of the Christmas celebrations by the Who's. Yes, make no mistake, 37 00:02:43,240 --> 00:02:47,480 Speaker 2: he not only saved Christmas, he usurped it, tore it down, 38 00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:52,160 Speaker 2: only to rebuild it back up in a cult dedicated 39 00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 2: to himself. He remade the holiday in his own image, 40 00:02:56,200 --> 00:03:00,320 Speaker 2: and even now no doubt rules over who culture within 41 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:04,000 Speaker 2: the dust back realm. Is there a lesson here for 42 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:08,360 Speaker 2: us mortals? Yes, there is. The Only way to stop 43 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:11,799 Speaker 2: the unwonted Christmas is to save it. The only way 44 00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:15,520 Speaker 2: to conquer it is to become it. Yes, the holiday 45 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 2: season is incredibly noxious and noisome, but one must lean 46 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:24,040 Speaker 2: into it. One must find the monsters that dwell within 47 00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:30,440 Speaker 2: crampuses and le lads, Grifthers and grinches, and celebrate them 48 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:34,320 Speaker 2: in your own way. Yes, I give you license to 49 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:38,800 Speaker 2: conquer your own Christmas, make it your own, and populate 50 00:03:38,880 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 2: it with the monsters of your choosing. And with that 51 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,440 Speaker 2: holiday message. I should I should wrap up this recording. 52 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:51,040 Speaker 2: I should have Maxwell ship it off to the podcasting 53 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:56,160 Speaker 2: factory for distribution. However that works, my studies await me 54 00:03:56,640 --> 00:04:00,840 Speaker 2: as does somewhere on the floors above the shapeless thing. 55 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:05,560 Speaker 2: And if I'm very quiet, it might not know I'm 56 00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:15,920 Speaker 2: here at all. Hi, This is Robert Lamb. Thanks once 57 00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:18,520 Speaker 2: more to doctor Anton Jess for checking in with us 58 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:21,200 Speaker 2: here it's Stuff to Blow Your Mind. If you go 59 00:04:21,279 --> 00:04:23,600 Speaker 2: through the archives of the Stuff to Blow Your Mind 60 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:26,760 Speaker 2: podcast feed, you'll find various contributions from him over the years, 61 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,120 Speaker 2: and if you go to YouTube you can look for 62 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:32,640 Speaker 2: his old Monster Science series video series. I'm not sure 63 00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:34,919 Speaker 2: how much of the science still holds up, honestly, but 64 00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:38,240 Speaker 2: the monsters largely do. If you would like to reach 65 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:41,359 Speaker 2: out to the Good Doctor, email us and we'll forward 66 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:44,880 Speaker 2: your thoughts onto him. Thanks as always to the excellent 67 00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:48,040 Speaker 2: JJ Possway for producing the show, and you can always 68 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:50,839 Speaker 2: reach us at contact at stuff to Blow your Mind 69 00:04:51,279 --> 00:04:58,080 Speaker 2: dot com. 70 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:01,159 Speaker 1: Stuff to Blow Your Mind is production of iHeartRadio. For 71 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 1: more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 72 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.