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Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast?

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Speaker 1: Firm Elvis Presents fifteen Minute Morning Show. Hi, everybody, welcome

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Speaker 1: to the fifteen Minute Morning Show. Hi, Froggy, Hey Gandhi,

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Speaker 1: Hey Scotty B, Hey Brody, Good morning, Eye, scary tone,

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Speaker 1: what's going on? Date? Oh? What's up? Guaranty and special

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Speaker 1: guest Andrew and he got the White Runners? Should I

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Speaker 1: get those tomorrow? Yeah, I'm already in his car. They're

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Speaker 1: already in his car. Okay. So, as you guys know,

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Speaker 1: I'm officiating another wedding. I am too. Two they're still together,

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Speaker 1: both couples. But you know, there was some awkward moments

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Speaker 1: at that wedding, as I feel like there are with

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Speaker 1: most weddings. What is the most awkward moment you've encountered

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Speaker 1: at a wedding that you've ever been to? Oh? Man, oh,

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Speaker 1: I have a couple. So one was totally my fault.

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Speaker 1: I think, Um, they asked me to DJ the wedding.

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Speaker 1: Why you should never have asked me to do that?

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Speaker 1: But I said, okay. It was one of my sister's

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Speaker 1: best friends. She handed me an iPod to just play.

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Speaker 1: It was I think it was like the instrumental of

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Speaker 1: chasing cars while she was walking down the aisle. And

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Speaker 1: I don't know what I did when it was playing that,

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Speaker 1: and I must have hit shuffle or like bumped it

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Speaker 1: to the next song. The m X party up as

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Speaker 1: she was walking down the aisle came on. I tried

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Speaker 1: to go back because I thought I'll just go back,

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Speaker 1: but since it was on shuffle, no, no, it went

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Speaker 1: to another song, so I just unplugged it, and all

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Speaker 1: you heard was that the times he was walking down

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Speaker 1: the aisle, I wanted to die. She said. It was

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Speaker 1: the greatest thing that could have happened at her wedding

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Speaker 1: because they all remember it. I was like, do you

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Speaker 1: something they'd forget that was bad? And then the second

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Speaker 1: one was it was out a wedding and the bridesmaids

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Speaker 1: encouraged the groom's sister to get up and give like

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Speaker 1: an impromptu speech, which was dick of the bridesmaids to

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Speaker 1: do because they knew this was not going to go well.

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Speaker 1: She got up and started talking about all of the

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Speaker 1: groom's friends who were at the wedding that she had

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Speaker 1: hooked up with, and she was pointing at them. The

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Speaker 1: dad got up and was like, sit round. It got

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Speaker 1: real awkward, hilarious. I loved it. It's great. Is their

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Speaker 1: video of this. You know, I catered weddings, so I

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Speaker 1: would always see these. They weren't my family. These have

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Speaker 1: nothing to do with me other than I was there

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Speaker 1: working as a way, this is about your family, No, no,

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Speaker 1: but I saw everything from uh, a groomsman getting a

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Speaker 1: blowjob in the chapel, from one of the bridesmaids, the

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Speaker 1: chapel where they would marry the people. Once once you

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Speaker 1: go upstairs to the main dining room, the chapel where

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Speaker 1: you actually did the ceremony goes dark and he's not

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Speaker 1: supposed to be any anyone in there. But I had

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Speaker 1: to go downstairs to get the fruit pladders, and I

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Speaker 1: have to walk through that room. I go in there

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Speaker 1: and walking through, I'm like, WHOA, what's going on under

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Speaker 1: the hoop? And that was going on. And then on

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Speaker 1: another wedding that we came to, I came, I ended

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Speaker 1: up seeing uh two. There was a wedding factory, so

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Speaker 1: there were two weddings could go on at the same time. Well,

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Speaker 1: someone at one wedding got into a fight with someone

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Speaker 1: at the other wedding because they just was bad blood.

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Speaker 1: Between them, and they had known each other. So the

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Speaker 1: entire weddings spilled out onto Emmon's Avenue of sheep, said

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Speaker 1: Babe Brooklyn, and the two weddings got into a fist fight.

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Speaker 1: Fist the cubs brawl like the guys like go get it,

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Speaker 1: let's get and then everyone ran out of the room.

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Speaker 1: And then and then it was like a literally like

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Speaker 1: the Jets in the Sharks West Side story style, and

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Speaker 1: both rooms emptied out into the street and got into

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Speaker 1: a fight. That's what went on in Brooklyn when you

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Speaker 1: catered weddings at the Palm Shore Club back in the

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Speaker 1: eighties and nineties, and families come together in Brooklyn weddings,

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Speaker 1: they end in street fights after the wedding. Yeah yeah.

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Speaker 1: On Long Island, we just found a baggy of coke

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Speaker 1: on the floor. Didn't know whose it was. That's so

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Speaker 1: I had an awkward moment. It doesn't quite top skieries.

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Speaker 1: But I went to a wedding of a couple that

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Speaker 1: I had introduced, I don't know, about five or six

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Speaker 1: years before the wedding, and they were kind enough to

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Speaker 1: ask me to be in the wedding party. So after

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Speaker 1: the ceremony, you know, people are finding their tables, and

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Speaker 1: the bride comes up to me and she says, you know,

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Speaker 1: we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you, And

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Speaker 1: you're so well spoken, and you write so well. I

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Speaker 1: can't wait to hear the speech you give. The problem

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Speaker 1: is I did not know about the speech I was

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Speaker 1: going to give. The groom was supposed to tell me

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Speaker 1: a month ago, and he hadn't, so I had to

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Speaker 1: write a speech on a napkin and about three minutes

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Speaker 1: and then go up before everybody and fake it. So

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Speaker 1: I had to pretend like, yeah, I couldn't read my

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Speaker 1: own hand right. It was terrible. So yeah, terrible. I

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Speaker 1: feel like there needs to be rules for the man

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Speaker 1: and the maid up speeches, Like I say, keep it

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Speaker 1: under five minutes. Yes, don't bullshit for ten minutes. It's

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Speaker 1: not where you're gonna lose people after the first one

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Speaker 1: or two. I even say cut it to three minutes.

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Speaker 1: A tight three minutes is great, And you don't have

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Speaker 1: to write out a speech and like and and put

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Speaker 1: a script, but put bullet points so you know your

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Speaker 1: next thing. And don't try and be funny or bring

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Speaker 1: religious or politics into it into that. I love you

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Speaker 1: always says tight. Three. I mean it's three minutes. Like

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Speaker 1: at that point, you're not losing anybody. Like if you

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Speaker 1: say you're gonna get up during everybody that I'm getting up.

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Speaker 1: If they start talking about that, it's like saying you're

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Speaker 1: going to Canada. If you're your your your politician doesn't win,

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Speaker 1: No one's leaving the wedding. You're gonna sit there, You're

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Speaker 1: gonna you're gonna drink in the people talking about you

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Speaker 1: at that point. This is a big bone of contention

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Speaker 1: for me with with the speeches. I've seen awful best

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Speaker 1: man and maid of honor speeches from catering weddings, just

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Speaker 1: disastrous that went on forever. And don't get too drunk

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Speaker 1: before you do it. You can have a couple of

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Speaker 1: drinks to loosen you up, but don't have eleven cocktails

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Speaker 1: and then be handed a microphone. I'm a fan of it.

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Speaker 1: Do that. And here's one tip I can give for

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Speaker 1: anybody having a wedding. Okay, it might be your maid

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Speaker 1: of honor that is technically supposed to give the speech,

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Speaker 1: or the best man. Pick the person that's a better

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Speaker 1: public speaker, because it's always terrible when its personally and

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Speaker 1: we went to the party and you can't understand that

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Speaker 1: fucking word they're saying, and they start sobbing. They have

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Speaker 1: no mic technique, they have zero presents. Everybody change them

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Speaker 1: out here, like you sound switten the moon, the sun

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Speaker 1: and the star and don't and don't make everything an

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Speaker 1: inside joke and don't explain it. So I went to

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Speaker 1: this one wedding and the guy was like, hey, remember

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Speaker 1: the time of the cabin? How great was that at

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Speaker 1: Remember that time at the at the drive through? How

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Speaker 1: wasn't that crazy talking to people? Not right? Not like

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Speaker 1: what happened at the cabin. I can't talk about the

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Speaker 1: cabin now, but you guys know what I'm talking about. Well, Andrew,

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Speaker 1: were you a Grimes Grooves? So how was that? Because

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Speaker 1: I've never seen that at a wedding, not that I'm

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Speaker 1: not aware of it. I basically served double duty. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So I got to be in two groups of pictures.

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Speaker 1: So far my record, I'm like in, I've been in

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Speaker 1: four weddings. I've attended six so far this year. Nice,

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I'm keeping my record. How does that work?

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Speaker 1: I mean, like, where do you stand? I'm losing a

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Speaker 1: lot of money I'll tell you that much, okay, but

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Speaker 1: be uh did you sit down or like, were you

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Speaker 1: on one side of the like the groom or the bride.

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Speaker 1: I was on the groom side, just for you know,

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Speaker 1: continuity purposes. Yes, I did the opposite where I was

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Speaker 1: the maid of honor on the guy side. So I was.

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Speaker 1: It was me and all the dudes. You were the

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Speaker 1: best made the best woman. They called him the best woman, um,

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Speaker 1: and the best. So I grew up with these guys,

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Speaker 1: and I was very much a tomboy if you guys

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Speaker 1: couldn't tell when I was a little kid. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: had to get I got ready with all the guys,

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Speaker 1: so I had a dress on, and when the guys

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Speaker 1: came out, they were like, what the fuck is happening here?

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Speaker 1: Fully expected you to be in a tuxedo? Yeah, totally, Nope,

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Speaker 1: wasn't allowed. With the way Scary is and all his

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Speaker 1: rules and the fact that all of us are such

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Speaker 1: good talkers, he needs to get married, so we can

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Speaker 1: all give speeches just to annoy him, like twenty minutes speeches.

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Speaker 1: I was the best man and my friend, my friend

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Speaker 1: told Darren's wedding and my own brother's wedding uh, and

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Speaker 1: I and I made speeches and I followed my own

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Speaker 1: rules and it came out great. But I will say,

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Speaker 1: of course it did. Yeah, when you were interviewing weird Aler, No, No,

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Speaker 1: like you're in you're in a there's a viding line.

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Speaker 1: You got the groom's family, you got the groom and

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Speaker 1: their guests, and the bride and their guests. So it's

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Speaker 1: two people, two groups of people that have come together

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Speaker 1: that don't know the other side. You kind of have

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Speaker 1: to play to both sides and say nice things about Obviously,

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Speaker 1: you gotta incorporate the bride into the speech. You know,

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Speaker 1: if you're the best man and you're you're not supposed

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Speaker 1: to just roast the groom. You're supposed to explain the

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Speaker 1: union of the marriage. Get in there and get it

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Speaker 1: together and tie it all up so everybody can walk

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Speaker 1: away with, oh, that was scary. You have the groom

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Speaker 1: side say hey, and the bride side say, oh, you

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Speaker 1: work in the crowd, you guys. Has anybody been to

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Speaker 1: a Disney wedding? Oh high wish I've been the main

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Speaker 1: rule at the reception there are no shots, So so

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Speaker 1: we smuggled in alcohol to do shots outside and we

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Speaker 1: got cun pite Goofy as he's walking into the reception

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Speaker 1: because they worked on you know, they don't korky. We

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Speaker 1: got the fat, We got the finger like he did this,

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Speaker 1: he fingered. Yeah, he figured me. I got figured by Goofy.

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Speaker 1: I got figured by No. No, but just thirty year

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Speaker 1: olds getting caught by a guy in a costume with

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Speaker 1: a look of shame, like he has a smile, he

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Speaker 1: can't even speak safe. He didn't ark, but you know

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Speaker 1: he pointed that finger out. You're like, no, no, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: You're not supposed to be doing that. I kind of

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Speaker 1: want to retroactively, like pick somebody who would have been

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Speaker 1: your best man on the show and then have a

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Speaker 1: best man Well you know what, Scotty, A quick best

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Speaker 1: man's three minutes. Please. You're not gonna believe this, and

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna be completely honest with you. My brother asked

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Speaker 1: me to do the best man speech and I turned

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Speaker 1: it down. Really, my brother, I am not a speech giver.

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Speaker 1: Why and you don't like your brother? That's not true. Um,

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Speaker 1: I just I don't know. I don't like standing up

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Speaker 1: in front of people like ad and reading and like

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Speaker 1: doing a speech. That's so funny because people automatically assume

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Speaker 1: because we do this show, like oh, you could get

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Speaker 1: up in front of a crowd. No. No, I'm not

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Speaker 1: really comfortable with that, you know. I mean I think

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Speaker 1: for the most part, well, scary, you're fine with it

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Speaker 1: because okay, Gandhi, how are you with being You're okay? Long,

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Speaker 1: But try to be funny and make things like no, yeah,

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Speaker 1: because they assume like, oh, you're the radio guy, You're

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Speaker 1: gonna have all sorts of jokes, like say something nice

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Speaker 1: about Nate right now. This is your opportunity, This is redemption. Scottie. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you sound like scary doing the intros to the wedding.

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Speaker 1: I would have to think about it and I'd have

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Speaker 1: to write something down. Well, maybe in the future we

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Speaker 1: can do perhaps, can you do it by Thursday? Um? No,

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Speaker 1: this one time we would deep throat and bananas. You know,

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Speaker 1: Nate what I'm talking about? Say that in front of

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Speaker 1: my parents and that would go over really well. Almost

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Speaker 1: would probably give you good one, I think. So I

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Speaker 1: wouldn't ask him though, because I feel like that's a

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Speaker 1: lot to ask. You would tell him to go to

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Speaker 1: commercial in the middle of it. You're running late Elvis,

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Speaker 1: you're running late. That would be a fun joke. Are

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Speaker 1: we done on time? I guess I guess he's doing

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Speaker 1: it now. That's me and all the dudes. You look

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Speaker 1: so great. I will say you kind of threw off

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Speaker 1: the photos though. Find a black dress. He told me

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Speaker 1: we're pink. I had to do it very actually officiating

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Speaker 1: two weddings this year, very very nervous about it. I

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Speaker 1: don't think I'm going to be great. I'm just I

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Speaker 1: don't want some're gonna be great. I need a lot

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Speaker 1: of tips because I'm just really married. You've never married

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Speaker 1: anybody someone? Can we hear? Can we hear your impromptu

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Speaker 1: intro you're in officiating? What when you were like, I'm

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Speaker 1: really great at this. The everybody focus on the main doors.

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Speaker 1: You know the piece of sound we actually, oh you

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Speaker 1: want to play that? Yeah? I will say defense. When

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Speaker 1: he has prep and names and a cute card in

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Speaker 1: front of him, he's fantastic. You pull that string and

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Speaker 1: he's like a baby. I have the fear of saying

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Speaker 1: the wrong thing and then you can't take it back.

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Speaker 1: That's that's my fear. Doing the best man speech. What

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Speaker 1: would you say about Nate that you couldn't take back

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Speaker 1: in a room full of people, like in this crowd Gray,

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Speaker 1: We're just a bunch of idiots, but like in a

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Speaker 1: crowd of people where I don't know, like aunts and

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Speaker 1: uncles and cousins and random friends and strangers, like because

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna want to try to be funny and I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna say something wrong, and I'm gonna say what an asshole?

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Speaker 1: Not only that name, pronunciations and affiliations. If you're trying

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Speaker 1: to talk like you know these people, and then in

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Speaker 1: your mind you get caught up in um, did I

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Speaker 1: say that right? That's that right? Or is that really

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Speaker 1: the But if you're officiating the wedding, you know these people, right,

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Speaker 1: You're not gonna mess up that. I'm gonna yeah, I

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Speaker 1: definitely know them. But I get really like I'm sappy.

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Speaker 1: I I cry at weddings. I was gonna make it

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Speaker 1: cry over the weekend. I did, and people were like,

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Speaker 1: oh wow, you were crying the whole time. It's like,

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Speaker 1: thanks for pointing it out. So I don't know how

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna be like can take each other's hands, I

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Speaker 1: will say infitiating. You definitely need to rely on humor,

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Speaker 1: like you need to be funny, and that opening is key.

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Speaker 1: You've got to have a good opening because it can

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Speaker 1: all go downhill. What is this? So? I was looking

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Speaker 1: for the clip that Gandhi asks for Scary as the

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Speaker 1: wedding DJ, but it says with music and reverb. That's yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's what we put on it to make it sound

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Speaker 1: like you're an actual DJ. We play this right now.

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Speaker 1: This is ladies and gentlemen. Everybody puts. Everybody stand up, Everybody, Okay,

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Speaker 1: here we go. Everybody now, everybody for the first time

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Speaker 1: as husband and wife into the room that brand new

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Speaker 1: Mr and Mrs Lisa Froggy together right now and then

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Speaker 1: they run into the room. Was I think I want

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Speaker 1: my money back? Tell think you're trying to do a

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Speaker 1: weather report. At the beginning, he sounded like a horse race.

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Speaker 1: Scotty's not going to give the best man speech for Nate.

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Speaker 1: It's not the perfect idea. If you were, I would

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Speaker 1: love to get your parents and Heather's parents in the

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Speaker 1: zoom room and really make Scotty feel awkward. No, I'm

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Speaker 1: not gonna happen by everybody by fifteen minute Morning Show