WEBVTT - 2025 Update: Joey 0:00:15.210 --> 0:00:22.049 Pushkin Khalila Holt, Welcome to the studio. 0:00:22.210 --> 0:00:24.410 You don't have to welcome you to the studio. Every 0:00:24.490 --> 0:00:27.770 time I feel welcome, I think they're welcome carries over 0:00:27.850 --> 0:00:28.570 week to week. 0:00:28.730 --> 0:00:32.690 I am a host of a nationally broadcast podcast. 0:00:33.129 --> 0:00:35.370 It's what we do host with the most. 0:00:35.570 --> 0:00:39.250 We're contractually obliged to welcome our guests, and you are 0:00:39.290 --> 0:00:41.449 my guests. Make no mistake about it. 0:00:41.450 --> 0:00:44.129 You're going to like offer me something to drink or no. 0:00:45.610 --> 0:00:48.809 So now we're going to be listening to a encore 0:00:48.849 --> 0:00:51.370 presentation of a little episode called Joey. 0:00:51.610 --> 0:00:51.769 Yes. 0:00:52.209 --> 0:00:55.690 And actually there is a line in this story that 0:00:55.930 --> 0:00:58.850 I still quote that we both oh, that's true. At 0:00:58.890 --> 0:01:01.210 the end of our meetings, Yeah, that's true, one person 0:01:01.290 --> 0:01:03.890 will say to the other adios. 0:01:03.330 --> 0:01:07.209 Yeah, I think it's you guys late to audios. 0:01:07.290 --> 0:01:09.450 Yeah. And as you listen, you'll be able to hear 0:01:09.530 --> 0:01:10.690 where that quote comes from. 0:01:10.770 --> 0:01:13.890 Yeah. So maybe you guys can work that into your 0:01:13.930 --> 0:01:14.570 lives too. 0:01:15.170 --> 0:01:17.450 All right, So let's get to it. Coming right up, 0:01:17.610 --> 0:01:20.610 an encore presentation of Joey And at the end of 0:01:20.650 --> 0:01:24.130 the episode, we're going to check in with Joey and 0:01:24.450 --> 0:01:25.410 a surprise guest. 0:01:25.530 --> 0:01:27.250 I can't wait to find out who it is. 0:01:27.690 --> 0:01:30.330 It's not you. No, you're a guest, but you're not 0:01:30.370 --> 0:01:31.250 a surprise guest. 0:01:31.370 --> 0:01:31.450 No. 0:01:31.690 --> 0:01:33.850 People are like, yeah, that makes sense that she is there. 0:01:34.410 --> 0:01:44.330 But first a word from our sponsors. Hi, John, Okay, 0:01:44.370 --> 0:01:47.690 if I were to plan a surprise vacation for us, 0:01:48.090 --> 0:01:50.330 where would you want to go? Did you say vacation? 0:01:50.650 --> 0:01:51.650 Surprise vacation? 0:01:53.210 --> 0:01:55.370 It could just never happen with my work schedule, like 0:01:55.450 --> 0:01:56.730 I can, that can never happen. 0:01:56.730 --> 0:01:57.570 Where would you want to go? 0:01:57.890 --> 0:01:58.770 Why would I want to go? 0:01:59.450 --> 0:02:02.050 For fun in the sun? Listen, no stress, you sound 0:02:02.370 --> 0:02:03.450 the idea of actually being on. 0:02:03.530 --> 0:02:05.730 Vacation with you, nice idea. 0:02:05.850 --> 0:02:07.650 It wouldn't be vacation with any It would be a 0:02:07.650 --> 0:02:10.250 slight caation because we do everything on a sleigh. We 0:02:10.490 --> 0:02:13.369 dashed through the snow and I don't know, like check 0:02:13.370 --> 0:02:17.290 our phones and argue. Occasionally you'd hang up on me 0:02:18.530 --> 0:02:28.410 and I'd start the show. But up bump from Gimblet Media. 0:02:28.690 --> 0:02:45.530 I'm Jonathan Goldstein and this is Heavyweight Today's episode. Joey 0:02:46.410 --> 0:02:49.810 as a young man, whenever conflict arose, my go to 0:02:49.970 --> 0:02:52.410 move was to roll up into a fetal ball and 0:02:52.530 --> 0:02:58.650 pray to go unnoticed. Of course, this only made matters worse. Case. 0:02:58.690 --> 0:03:02.690 In point one afternoon, while riding a trolley, I fell 0:03:02.730 --> 0:03:06.410 into a daydream and missed my stop. Anyone else in 0:03:06.450 --> 0:03:09.290 my position might have yelled, I missed my stop. Up 0:03:09.610 --> 0:03:13.650 or open the door please, But in imagining all these 0:03:13.690 --> 0:03:17.210 trolley riding strangers turning around to stare at me, my 0:03:17.330 --> 0:03:20.770 mind went blank. So I decided it might be simpler 0:03:21.170 --> 0:03:26.570 draw less attention if I just jumped off. As I 0:03:26.650 --> 0:03:29.330 landed onto the street, I heard a high pitched scream 0:03:29.530 --> 0:03:33.330 that I would later realize was coming from me. Instead 0:03:33.370 --> 0:03:37.730 of drawing less attention, I was now center stage. The 0:03:37.810 --> 0:03:41.130 trolley conductor skidded to a halt, and all the passengers 0:03:41.250 --> 0:03:44.370 ran to the windows to watch as I painfully crawled 0:03:44.370 --> 0:03:48.210 into a nearby bush. Once in the bush, I hid 0:03:48.770 --> 0:03:56.810 waiting for the trolley to leave. For young Jonathan Goldstein, 0:03:57.170 --> 0:04:00.490 the cost of staying silent that day was two twisted 0:04:00.530 --> 0:04:04.930 ankles and the loss of my pride. Hey, Joey, hey. 0:04:04.770 --> 0:04:06.050 There to hear from you. 0:04:06.650 --> 0:04:09.770 This is young Joey, and he recently had a bad 0:04:09.850 --> 0:04:13.250 day that forced him to realize his fear of being seen, 0:04:13.650 --> 0:04:16.969 his fear of speaking up was exacting a far greater 0:04:17.089 --> 0:04:21.010 cost than a mere double ankle injury. It was ruining 0:04:21.050 --> 0:04:25.650 his life, and so he's reached out for help from. 0:04:25.450 --> 0:04:28.089 Me and just never get myself in a situation like 0:04:28.130 --> 0:04:28.609 this again. 0:04:29.409 --> 0:04:32.010 I think Joey is twenty two years old, and the 0:04:32.089 --> 0:04:35.130 lead up to his terrible, horrible, no good, very bad 0:04:35.210 --> 0:04:39.049 day begins right after his art school graduation, when he 0:04:39.130 --> 0:04:42.409 moved into an artist's loft in downtown. 0:04:42.089 --> 0:04:45.210 LA live in that downtown city life kind of living, 0:04:45.250 --> 0:04:46.329 that communal living style. 0:04:46.729 --> 0:04:49.810 The downside was that the loft had bedsheets for walls 0:04:50.130 --> 0:04:54.050 in six roommates. But the plus side, the loft had 0:04:54.089 --> 0:05:00.009 bed sheets for walls and six roommates, six super cool roommates, 0:05:00.289 --> 0:05:04.409 a DJ, a dollmaker, a photographer, a guy who quote 0:05:04.529 --> 0:05:08.650 trimmed weed, and super coolest of all, a podcaster. 0:05:09.130 --> 0:05:14.450 And I pictured these cool artist types having great parties 0:05:14.609 --> 0:05:17.089 and a lot of cool people over and all the 0:05:17.210 --> 0:05:20.969 artists in the LA scene would come through and I 0:05:21.089 --> 0:05:24.730 was gonna come in and hopefully fit in immediately. 0:05:26.010 --> 0:05:30.249 But Joey didn't fit in immediately. He never felt comfortable 0:05:30.330 --> 0:05:32.969 just hanging out with everyone, never knew what to say, 0:05:33.929 --> 0:05:35.890 and so he ended up spending most of his time 0:05:36.049 --> 0:05:40.969 alone in his room, rehearsing icebreakers. I like your tattoo, 0:05:41.330 --> 0:05:47.370 he'd repeat to himself, your tattoo. I like it, sweet tat, 0:05:47.849 --> 0:05:51.250 he'd say, pointing limply at the mirror, like a socially 0:05:51.289 --> 0:05:55.689 crippled Travis Bickle. Unable to come up with anything that 0:05:55.770 --> 0:06:00.410 felt right, paralysis set in. Joey began spending all day 0:06:00.450 --> 0:06:03.650 in his room, a shadow behind a bedsheet. 0:06:04.609 --> 0:06:06.449 They'd all be in the living room right next to 0:06:06.489 --> 0:06:10.089 my room, hanging out, watching a movie, drinking, hanging and 0:06:10.130 --> 0:06:12.370 doing the thing, and I would be in my room, 0:06:12.529 --> 0:06:16.289 just like making people uncomfortable with by not, you know, 0:06:16.489 --> 0:06:17.169 being out there. 0:06:17.849 --> 0:06:20.409 Joey had been living in the loft several weeks when 0:06:20.409 --> 0:06:24.290 he realized just how isolated he'd become. One day, well, 0:06:24.330 --> 0:06:26.729 waiting outside the bathroom, he ran into one of his 0:06:26.770 --> 0:06:27.450 new roommates. 0:06:27.890 --> 0:06:30.930 She She was like, oh, Hi, what's your name? Oh 0:06:30.969 --> 0:06:35.849 where do you live? I was like, uh, here, I'd 0:06:35.890 --> 0:06:39.210 live here. 0:06:44.770 --> 0:06:49.010 Eventually, Joey began avoiding the loft altogether. He'd spend every 0:06:49.089 --> 0:06:52.489 day wandering the street, only returning in the evening. 0:06:53.570 --> 0:06:55.089 When I was back in my house at night, I 0:06:55.089 --> 0:06:58.130 would sneak into my room and then make and then 0:06:58.169 --> 0:07:00.890 make it drink make sure I didn't drink too much 0:07:00.890 --> 0:07:03.210 water so that my bladder was empty so I wouldn't 0:07:03.250 --> 0:07:05.489 have to leave my room to pee. My new goal 0:07:05.609 --> 0:07:08.169 was to just be as unobtrusive as a roommate as possible, 0:07:08.810 --> 0:07:13.569 be invisible, so in this time I would just try 0:07:13.570 --> 0:07:16.850 to spend all my day out of the house, out 0:07:16.850 --> 0:07:21.170 on my rollerblades, which I had also recently taken up. 0:07:22.130 --> 0:07:25.489 Everyone needs a hobby, and Joey found one that provided 0:07:25.530 --> 0:07:28.210 both good exercise as well as a way to free 0:07:28.330 --> 0:07:32.090 himself from the oppressive yoke of human dignity. And so 0:07:32.210 --> 0:07:35.530 it was while rollerblading that Joey discovered his new home 0:07:35.570 --> 0:07:40.530 away from home, the pizza Parlor. The pizza parlor played 0:07:40.570 --> 0:07:43.330 cool music and had cool art on the walls. It 0:07:43.450 --> 0:07:46.730 even served cool pizza. There was one shape like a 0:07:46.770 --> 0:07:51.650 marijuana leaf, and other shape like circles. But because Joey 0:07:51.730 --> 0:07:55.009 was Joey, even a simple thing like ordering pizza was 0:07:55.050 --> 0:07:59.010 a challenge, and so he rehearsed his icebreakers. 0:07:59.810 --> 0:08:02.569 I found myself like making sure I could you know, 0:08:02.650 --> 0:08:05.730 have something to say, like preparing something for the quick 0:08:06.250 --> 0:08:08.489 interaction while I buy my pizza. 0:08:08.730 --> 0:08:09.570 Like kind of thing. 0:08:10.650 --> 0:08:12.970 I don't know, Like if it's raining out, I would 0:08:13.050 --> 0:08:14.650 have something clever to say about. 0:08:14.369 --> 0:08:17.690 That, Or give me an example of the clever thing 0:08:17.730 --> 0:08:18.970 that you would say when it was raining. 0:08:19.970 --> 0:08:26.850 I'd say, oh, man, bummer, and this is not rollerblading weather, okay, 0:08:26.890 --> 0:08:29.489 like I would, or I don't know what I'm trying 0:08:29.489 --> 0:08:29.730 to say. 0:08:31.610 --> 0:08:35.330 Slowly, Joey began making social inroads, even managing to earn 0:08:35.410 --> 0:08:40.010 himself a nickname, that rollerblading guy. His fantasy is a 0:08:40.090 --> 0:08:43.370 fun and friendship with his bohemian loft buddies were over, 0:08:43.970 --> 0:08:46.170 but his fantasy is a fun in friendship with his 0:08:46.250 --> 0:08:49.770 bohemian pizza parlor buddies had only just begun. 0:08:50.650 --> 0:08:54.330 I had planned on continuing to visit there and making 0:08:54.410 --> 0:08:58.730 these friendships grow and hopefully progressing them to real life 0:08:58.730 --> 0:09:00.050 friendships outside of the shop. 0:09:04.530 --> 0:09:07.410 And so every morning Joey would blade straight to the 0:09:07.450 --> 0:09:11.170 self service refrigerator that housed the day old dollar slices. 0:09:12.170 --> 0:09:14.930 I pretty much exclusively ate pizza from that moment on 0:09:15.770 --> 0:09:20.130 for all your meals pretty much. There was definitely days 0:09:20.170 --> 0:09:22.650 that went by when it was just pizza, Like how 0:09:22.650 --> 0:09:25.450 many slices a day. Were you eating to say four 0:09:25.530 --> 0:09:28.410 or five two for breakfast and then stick them in 0:09:28.450 --> 0:09:29.770 my backpack for the rest of the day. 0:09:31.210 --> 0:09:33.970 What were you doing for fruits and vegetables? 0:09:34.730 --> 0:09:40.090 I occasionally got the veggie slice. 0:09:40.170 --> 0:09:44.650 And that was Joey's life, eating za, rolling blades, and 0:09:44.690 --> 0:09:49.610 waiting for old man scurvy until one terrible, horrible, no good, 0:09:49.970 --> 0:09:55.610 very bad day, January fourteenth, was like every other day. 0:09:56.170 --> 0:09:59.050 I woke up to go get my pizza, headed into 0:09:59.130 --> 0:10:04.770 the shop and unfortunately I only found pepperoni in the fridge. 0:10:04.970 --> 0:10:09.250 Joey is a vegetarian, and so without having prepared anything 0:10:09.130 --> 0:10:13.490 and clever to say, like pepperoni pizza, Oh man, bummer, 0:10:13.730 --> 0:10:18.530 Pepperonis aren't vegetarian, he instead said nothing and tried to 0:10:18.610 --> 0:10:21.970 just roller blade back out the door without anyone noticing. 0:10:22.970 --> 0:10:25.530 But he'd only bladed a couple of blocks when he 0:10:25.570 --> 0:10:28.130 saw a familiar face biking towards him. 0:10:28.570 --> 0:10:31.690 And it's one of the pizza chefs. So I just 0:10:31.730 --> 0:10:34.250 thought he was gonna hell, I don't know. I thought 0:10:34.290 --> 0:10:37.250 he was gonna say, what's up, man, let's hang out. 0:10:37.290 --> 0:10:38.410 What's your name? 0:10:38.450 --> 0:10:38.610 Will? 0:10:38.890 --> 0:10:41.610 Let's you know. I thought he was just interested in me. 0:10:43.370 --> 0:10:45.050 So I was excited to see him biking towards me, 0:10:46.410 --> 0:10:49.570 and I took off my headphones to greet him. And 0:10:49.610 --> 0:11:00.770 the first thing he said is don't come back. I said, 0:11:00.770 --> 0:11:03.490 excuse me. He said, you're taking slices. 0:11:04.850 --> 0:11:09.689 I said what, And then it clicked, flipping through the 0:11:09.730 --> 0:11:13.490 dollar slices and then abruptly leaving in silence. Looked fishy, 0:11:14.130 --> 0:11:15.610 like Joey was stealing pizza. 0:11:16.690 --> 0:11:21.090 And I was kind of like panicking talking to him, 0:11:21.130 --> 0:11:22.490 like I could feel that I could hear the panic 0:11:22.570 --> 0:11:24.890 in my woice and stuff. But I didn't know what 0:11:24.930 --> 0:11:26.809 to say, so I kind of just I was kind 0:11:26.810 --> 0:11:29.730 of speechless, and I, you know, didn't have the confidence 0:11:29.770 --> 0:11:36.770 to keep fighting. Okay, Yeah, and then he. 0:11:35.290 --> 0:11:36.850 He biked away. 0:11:37.050 --> 0:11:40.250 I started crying on the streets, and I must have 0:11:40.290 --> 0:11:43.450 looked ridiculous, rollerblading down the street while crying. 0:11:44.690 --> 0:11:47.810 At that point, it was a terrible day. It became 0:11:47.890 --> 0:11:52.250 horrible as well as no good and very bad when Joey, 0:11:52.290 --> 0:11:55.970 crying on the street, received a phone call bearing more 0:11:56.010 --> 0:11:59.930 bad news. 0:12:00.770 --> 0:12:05.130 The roommates had been kind of talking and they that 0:12:07.090 --> 0:12:10.090 they used the words getting under their skin. 0:12:11.690 --> 0:12:16.450 The roommates found Joey's silent, sneaky ways, unsettling. They wanted 0:12:16.530 --> 0:12:17.130 him out. 0:12:18.090 --> 0:12:22.730 I like went and got my stuff, and I don't know, 0:12:22.810 --> 0:12:27.130 I basically moved out in that moment. I like just 0:12:27.250 --> 0:12:33.370 left without without seeing anybody, and I kind of ran away. 0:12:37.650 --> 0:12:40.210 As the day came to a close, Joey called the 0:12:40.250 --> 0:12:43.330 one person he always calls, the person he's leaned on 0:12:43.410 --> 0:12:47.170 his whole life, Elise, his twin sister. 0:12:48.130 --> 0:12:50.010 She gave me the same advice that everyone did, which 0:12:50.050 --> 0:12:53.370 is just you know, go talk to them, be normal. 0:12:55.770 --> 0:12:59.010 But I don't know, I mean, I never was able 0:12:59.050 --> 0:13:02.050 to take that advice from anybody coming from her, though 0:13:02.050 --> 0:13:05.370 it was especially I felt especially bad. 0:13:06.610 --> 0:13:09.690 He was like almost in tears telling me this story. 0:13:10.770 --> 0:13:13.770 Elise knows Joey better than anyone, and he's relied on 0:13:13.810 --> 0:13:17.530 her socially his entire life. When he started dating, Elise 0:13:17.610 --> 0:13:19.810 introduced him to her friends, and when he was too 0:13:19.890 --> 0:13:23.450 anxious to attend family functions, Elise would go in his place. 0:13:24.210 --> 0:13:26.690 And he told me about how he cried, which is 0:13:26.770 --> 0:13:29.050 always he doesn't cry that often. 0:13:29.170 --> 0:13:29.290 Hm. 0:13:29.370 --> 0:13:31.210 Hm, you could tell it was a big deal that 0:13:31.250 --> 0:13:34.490 he expressed that he cried about it. And he told 0:13:34.490 --> 0:13:38.090 the whole story and I was laughing so hard because 0:13:39.610 --> 0:13:42.250 it's a really funny story, and I wanted him to 0:13:42.290 --> 0:13:44.450 see that it was funny too, and he could see 0:13:44.490 --> 0:13:48.330 the humor in it, but he was also pretty clearly devastated. 0:13:49.290 --> 0:13:51.929 When I ask Elise what's so funny about her brother 0:13:52.010 --> 0:13:54.970 crying on the phone, she makes a pretty strong case, 0:13:55.530 --> 0:13:59.370 casually eviscerating him in the way only a loving sister can. 0:13:59.890 --> 0:14:04.250 Him and his rollerblades and often like funny looking tank tops, 0:14:04.290 --> 0:14:08.210 his like creeper mustache, and his mullet definitely wait, just 0:14:08.210 --> 0:14:08.850 the look. 0:14:08.650 --> 0:14:11.330 Of him, Hang on a second. He has a mullet. 0:14:12.490 --> 0:14:24.850 Full mullet full, full, creepy young child mustache, and his 0:14:24.930 --> 0:14:30.290 shoulders and arms look looks strong, but they're small, and 0:14:30.370 --> 0:14:35.250 same with his legs. His legs are shockingly skinny. They 0:14:35.290 --> 0:14:37.850 do have an incredible shine to them, I will admit. 0:14:38.130 --> 0:14:39.450 Does he does he play? 0:14:40.770 --> 0:14:43.810 I'm not sure that's ointment. I'm guessing that's just his 0:14:43.930 --> 0:14:44.730 oily self. 0:14:49.290 --> 0:14:51.450 I don't want Joey to have to wait years and 0:14:51.530 --> 0:14:54.370 years like I did, just to know the sweet joys 0:14:54.410 --> 0:14:58.650 of uncrippling an abnormality. So I asked Joey's oily self 0:14:58.810 --> 0:15:01.290 what he most wants out of all this, and the 0:15:01.330 --> 0:15:04.970 answer he delivers is pretty to the point, almost like 0:15:05.050 --> 0:15:05.850 he's rehearsed it. 0:15:06.730 --> 0:15:09.890 I want to say sorry that that I wasn't able 0:15:09.890 --> 0:15:14.130 to leave my room. I wish they knew how I felt, basically. 0:15:14.930 --> 0:15:17.650 But when I put forward my action plan for Joey 0:15:17.690 --> 0:15:22.010 to fix his bad day by rerollerblading through it, rerollerblading 0:15:22.090 --> 0:15:24.490 back to the pizza parlor to clear his name, and 0:15:24.610 --> 0:15:28.490 rerollerblading to the loft to apologize for being such a creepy, 0:15:28.490 --> 0:15:32.130 sneaky roommate, I can hear the beads of sweat squeak 0:15:32.210 --> 0:15:35.330 out of Joey's hairline and saturate his mullet. 0:15:36.250 --> 0:15:42.010 Right, Yeah, I'm definitely Yeah, I've definitely been meaning to, 0:15:42.170 --> 0:15:48.010 but the prospect is pretty scary. Just mentioning it, I 0:15:48.050 --> 0:15:49.010 got nervous, for sure. 0:15:50.210 --> 0:15:53.850 Joey still wants to be invisible, but decades of experience 0:15:53.930 --> 0:15:57.450 have taught me that oftentimes the more invisible you try 0:15:57.490 --> 0:16:01.130 to make yourself, the more visible you become. So if 0:16:01.130 --> 0:16:03.890 I have my way, Joey will no longer have to 0:16:04.010 --> 0:16:08.570 hide in the metaphorical bush like a young metaphorical Jonathan Goldstein. 0:16:15.250 --> 0:16:29.850 After the break helping Joey to stop spinning his wheels. Okay, 0:16:29.970 --> 0:16:31.730 hold the line for a moment, Joey, all right. 0:16:32.530 --> 0:16:36.490 Sounds good. Hang on, I'm practicing my witty retorts anything. 0:16:36.490 --> 0:16:38.770 Don't do that, Okay. 0:16:40.370 --> 0:16:42.690 During the ad break, while you were loading up on 0:16:42.930 --> 0:16:47.130 unbelievable deals, I was considering the full extent of Joey's 0:16:47.130 --> 0:16:52.330 dilemma as much as Jonathan Debonair Goldstein wanted to help him. 0:16:52.650 --> 0:16:56.810 The truth is, Jonathan Stuart Goldstein is actually a lot 0:16:56.850 --> 0:16:59.770 like Joey, and so I made a phone call to 0:16:59.810 --> 0:17:03.530 an old friend, a man whose example and critical feedback, 0:17:04.010 --> 0:17:07.449 some might say overly critical feedback, have helped me to 0:17:07.490 --> 0:17:13.169 become the animal associate alibis. I am today, happy, confident, 0:17:13.770 --> 0:17:16.850 out of the shrubs and loving it. And I was 0:17:16.889 --> 0:17:20.769 hoping you could work the same magic on Joey. Joey, 0:17:20.770 --> 0:17:22.050 this is my friend Gregor. 0:17:22.609 --> 0:17:25.209 Howdy. 0:17:25.369 --> 0:17:28.649 Hey, So Joey was living in this loft and he 0:17:29.010 --> 0:17:32.369 Gregor is the exact opposite of Joey and me in 0:17:32.409 --> 0:17:36.090 any given social interaction. He's never afraid to stand out, 0:17:36.570 --> 0:17:40.209 never afraid to say the wrong thing. Case in point, 0:17:40.689 --> 0:17:42.729 was Johnny kidding when he said you're wearing rollerblades. 0:17:43.050 --> 0:17:46.530 No, I am a rollerblader, but. 0:17:46.570 --> 0:17:48.609 So you rollerbladed into the store wearing your. 0:17:48.530 --> 0:17:49.850 Rollerblades, that's right. 0:17:50.810 --> 0:17:53.090 I have these very vivid memories of being in Central 0:17:53.129 --> 0:17:56.410 Park and seeing these people, mostly grown men, on rollerblades 0:17:56.449 --> 0:17:58.850 with that folded hands over the lower back and their 0:17:58.929 --> 0:18:01.570 body bent forward like zipping around in like a lycroskin suit, 0:18:01.649 --> 0:18:03.889 the big giant grin as they gasped for breath, and like, 0:18:03.970 --> 0:18:04.529 goggles on. 0:18:05.129 --> 0:18:06.449 You got all that out of your system. 0:18:06.730 --> 0:18:09.569 I hate rollerbladers, and I hate everything about rollerbla but 0:18:09.609 --> 0:18:11.369 I think most people don't have the cardage to ask 0:18:11.369 --> 0:18:13.250 for help. It takes a very big man to ask 0:18:13.290 --> 0:18:15.929 for help. Okay, so the guy wants to roller blade. 0:18:15.929 --> 0:18:16.729 Fine. 0:18:18.609 --> 0:18:22.810 Since Joey feels most comfortable when he's rehearsing social interactions, 0:18:23.209 --> 0:18:26.889 I suggest we do some role playing. Joey plays himself 0:18:27.090 --> 0:18:30.729 and Gregor plays the pizza shop owner. After ten minutes 0:18:30.770 --> 0:18:35.249 deliberating over his character's name, Gregor decides on Carmine, please 0:18:35.290 --> 0:18:37.850 call me Karmi. All right, stop just trying to a 0:18:38.010 --> 0:18:40.330 little depth of the character. Don't do that. Once I 0:18:40.409 --> 0:18:43.969 finish offering some helpful direction, we begin. So Okay, so 0:18:44.129 --> 0:18:47.250 you're you're the owner. I'll do the folly work. I'll 0:18:47.250 --> 0:18:52.129 make any necessary sounds. Okay, Joey, you're coming up to 0:18:52.129 --> 0:18:54.289 the pizza parlor, tingle, tingle. 0:18:55.770 --> 0:19:00.769 Hey, so it's been a long time. I don't know 0:19:00.810 --> 0:19:05.290 if you heard I. 0:19:05.290 --> 0:19:06.249 I had a bit of a. 0:19:08.770 --> 0:19:13.010 Joe trails off even in a simulation. His nerves get 0:19:13.010 --> 0:19:16.090 the better of him. I try to inspire him with 0:19:16.169 --> 0:19:19.969 more folly work. Tingle, tingle. The place is starting to 0:19:19.970 --> 0:19:21.530 fill up a little, so you might want to spit 0:19:21.570 --> 0:19:23.889 it out. Tingle, tingle, tingle, tingle. 0:19:23.929 --> 0:19:29.249 Oh my god, it's like radio lab. Suddenly a monkey 0:19:29.330 --> 0:19:33.929 came in. Gregor call me Carmen the whole duration of 0:19:33.970 --> 0:19:36.129 this shoot. I need to be in character. I'm like 0:19:36.209 --> 0:19:38.649 Daniel day Lewis. I will only answer if you call 0:19:38.730 --> 0:19:39.169 me CARMI. 0:19:39.369 --> 0:19:41.409 Why did I even have you be the shop owner? 0:19:41.409 --> 0:19:42.850 Why wasn't I the shop owner? 0:19:43.050 --> 0:19:45.290 I could be your son who's got like bigger dreams. 0:19:45.330 --> 0:19:47.209 I don't want to spend my whole life singing pizza 0:19:47.409 --> 0:19:49.889 derailing that I got big dreams. I want to get 0:19:49.929 --> 0:19:53.969 into real estate, commercial real estate. I want to least laundromats. 0:19:54.090 --> 0:19:55.250 See I'm not like you. 0:19:55.250 --> 0:19:56.129 You really, I want to. 0:19:56.129 --> 0:20:00.129 Have a self storage unit. They're very profitable, don't you see? 0:20:02.010 --> 0:20:03.769 Now we're gelling as a team right at the very end. 0:20:03.850 --> 0:20:05.489 As you start to fade us down, you can't even 0:20:05.530 --> 0:20:06.449 hear what I'm saying anymore. 0:20:07.409 --> 0:20:10.369 Sure, Gregor was taking none of the work seriously, But 0:20:10.490 --> 0:20:14.410 Joey was enjoying Gregor, and in his own way, Gregor 0:20:14.770 --> 0:20:26.169 was enjoying Joey. It looked like Gregor was in I 0:20:26.209 --> 0:20:28.970 noticed that you like to sit very close to the gate. 0:20:30.129 --> 0:20:32.369 Gregor and I meet at the airport for the flight 0:20:32.449 --> 0:20:35.529 to see Joey in La. While squatting on the floor 0:20:35.730 --> 0:20:39.649 staring fixedly at the gate, Gregor shares some insider tips 0:20:39.689 --> 0:20:40.889 on air travel. 0:20:40.970 --> 0:20:43.130 Because when they say extra time getting down the gate, 0:20:43.250 --> 0:20:45.050 joe Way, you're allowed to run. 0:20:44.929 --> 0:20:45.850 Past those people. 0:20:51.850 --> 0:20:53.249 You're allowed. 0:20:54.330 --> 0:20:56.649 See if like I could easily run outrun that little 0:20:56.689 --> 0:20:59.850 girl in the purple. Anyway, Johnny, stick with me. I'm 0:20:59.850 --> 0:21:03.890 gonna show you how to board this big bird. That's 0:21:03.889 --> 0:21:05.609 where I stay at the pilot when I bought the claim. 0:21:06.090 --> 0:21:09.130 Let's bring this big bird down brother. That way, he 0:21:09.169 --> 0:21:12.250 knows I'm a member of the free Eternity of aviation. 0:21:21.250 --> 0:21:22.770 Cross check at ready to grow accomplies. 0:21:23.850 --> 0:21:26.449 Once we've board it, running down the jetway like a 0:21:26.449 --> 0:21:30.729 couple of giggling idiots, Gregor regales me with stories the 0:21:30.810 --> 0:21:33.770 time lou Reid threatened to put an ashtray through his head. 0:21:33.970 --> 0:21:35.569 No he didn't, Yeah, heavy glass one. 0:21:35.689 --> 0:21:38.010 The time a taxi driver told me he had eyes 0:21:38.090 --> 0:21:41.250 like his dead brothers. That's a terrible story. The time 0:21:41.490 --> 0:21:44.050 all dozen or so members of the Wu Tang clan 0:21:44.369 --> 0:21:47.330 squeezed onto his living room couch. He asked for my 0:21:47.409 --> 0:21:50.649 seat to t Then come the aviation stories, all the 0:21:50.689 --> 0:21:53.129 flights he's been on where people have died. 0:21:53.369 --> 0:21:55.290 But then there was another photos on when someone died 0:21:55.369 --> 0:21:57.209 right next to me, and they were literally doing the 0:21:57.250 --> 0:21:59.490 thing on the PA where they're like there's any doctors 0:21:59.490 --> 0:22:02.850 on board? And I was like, I'm kind of a doctor. 0:22:03.090 --> 0:22:04.409 How are you kind of a doctor? 0:22:04.449 --> 0:22:08.010 I'm a very good diagnostician. Look, we're on twenty five RL. 0:22:08.209 --> 0:22:09.530 It's one of my favorite always. 0:22:14.689 --> 0:22:16.689 Gregor and I rent a car and meet up with 0:22:16.770 --> 0:22:20.409 Joey at his favorite coffee shop. From here, we planned 0:22:20.409 --> 0:22:23.529 to head to the pizza parlor, get him unbanned, and 0:22:23.570 --> 0:22:26.489 then go to the loft so Joey can apologize to 0:22:26.570 --> 0:22:27.649 his former roommates. 0:22:28.609 --> 0:22:30.409 Morning, nice to meet hi. 0:22:30.570 --> 0:22:31.290 How are you Hi? 0:22:32.970 --> 0:22:33.450 How you? 0:22:34.369 --> 0:22:38.369 As well as being rollerblade footed, Joey's just as chopstick legged, 0:22:38.530 --> 0:22:42.609 mustache lipped, and mullet headed, as his sister Relise had cautioned, 0:22:44.209 --> 0:22:45.969 did it take you a while to decide like what 0:22:46.010 --> 0:22:48.729 you were going to wear today? Joey seems anxious, so 0:22:48.810 --> 0:22:52.929 I asked him, Joey, are you anxious? But before he 0:22:52.970 --> 0:22:54.929 can answer, Gregor steps in. 0:22:55.250 --> 0:22:56.570 John, Let's take it from here. You don't want to 0:22:56.570 --> 0:22:58.209 make the guy nervous by asking me if he was nervous, 0:22:58.250 --> 0:22:59.930 why don't you go around in a circle and each say, 0:22:59.929 --> 0:23:01.570 a member of the woutang until we get on. 0:23:02.449 --> 0:23:06.450 With his idiot's game. What Gregor's really doing is distracting Joey, 0:23:06.810 --> 0:23:12.609 protecting him, in this case, protecting him from me. Ready, Okay, 0:23:12.649 --> 0:23:19.770 I'll start the diju. Let's stop just this is the genius, genius? Okay, 0:23:21.409 --> 0:23:27.290 stop number one? The pizza parlor? Is this the place? 0:23:27.449 --> 0:23:28.609 What time they open? Eleven? 0:23:29.290 --> 0:23:29.450 Oh? 0:23:29.449 --> 0:23:31.810 I'm getting nervous. My stomach is jumping. 0:23:32.369 --> 0:23:34.649 Oh wait here, Joey, I have some in the creer 0:23:34.770 --> 0:23:38.490 just in case. As Joey's mentor, I know he runs 0:23:38.490 --> 0:23:41.530 a pretty good chance of choking, so I prepared him 0:23:41.530 --> 0:23:44.169 some notes during my flight. Okay, here you go. Read this. 0:23:45.810 --> 0:23:45.929 Right. 0:23:47.050 --> 0:23:49.330 You guys were like family to me, and when you 0:23:49.330 --> 0:23:51.929