Speaker 1: Hello, Hi, Who is hi?
Speaker 2: I am a wit named today I gave Flee. That's
Speaker 2: my name.
Speaker 1: How are you? How are you doing? Flee?
Speaker 2: I'm doing kind of crappy right now. Why I'm just
Speaker 2: like really in my like depression and stuff.
Speaker 1: Uh, flee. It says here that you used to be
Speaker 1: a professional clown. Yes, you are a stereotypical sad clown.
Speaker 2: Yes, but that's that's actually not one of my clown
Speaker 2: my clown characters. It's sad your clown character as a person. No, No,
Speaker 2: the clown is very cheery, goofy, sneaky, sexy.
Speaker 1: A sexy clown. What kind of sexy clown?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Well, I would like to do a strip tease
Speaker 2: where I would roll around and broken glass.
Speaker 1: You did a strip tease? You would roll around and
Speaker 1: broken like actually broken glass?
Speaker 2: Yeah, like I would break beer bottles before the show,
Speaker 2: you round and broken beer bottles.
Speaker 1: Uh did that ever hurt?
Speaker 2: Surprisingly? Not No, not that often?
Speaker 3: No, mm hmm.
Speaker 1: How did you How did you train yourself for that
Speaker 1: to not hurt?
Speaker 2: There's well, there's a lot of spiritual stuff with paint,
Speaker 2: like peer know about piercings and how people do like
Speaker 2: pain tried stuff? Well, there's people who do like suspense
Speaker 2: or they'll like play pierced their Bobby, and I'll kind
Speaker 2: of say, it's like that where you kind of just
Speaker 2: accept it as it's happening. I've been like the bed
Speaker 2: of nails stuff like sideshow better nails really lay on
Speaker 2: the bed of nails, and it doesn't it doesn't hurt.
Speaker 2: I don't really know how to explain it. This doesn't
Speaker 2: really hurt.
Speaker 1: So Flee. It says here that you're a former clown
Speaker 1: and you got sober and then when you got sober,
Speaker 1: you stopped going out and clowning around. Is that accurate? Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: tell me about that.
Speaker 4: Yes.
Speaker 2: Well, so I lived in New Orleans and it's very
Speaker 2: a drunk city. So when I got sober, there was
Speaker 2: like almost nothing to do that didn't involve like people
Speaker 2: being wasted or on kiddymene. So I just stopped going out.
Speaker 2: And this was like way before COVID happened, too, so
Speaker 2: because then COVID happened and then I had to isolate
Speaker 2: even more and I regret not clowning at home without
Speaker 2: the event of it all.
Speaker 1: So do you feel those are the fact that you're
Speaker 1: sober now means that you no longer can go out
Speaker 1: and clown.
Speaker 2: No. I moved. I moved out of New Orleans and
Speaker 2: I'm in an Oregon now and I go out every
Speaker 2: so often trying to find this community. And I've dressed
Speaker 2: up as a clown. I dressed as a clown for Halloween,
Speaker 2: and I went out to a movie and there's a
Speaker 2: sex club here where I dressed up as a clown
Speaker 2: at h Yeah, COVID, So.
Speaker 1: Why are you depressed right now?
Speaker 2: I just don't really have a lot of friends or community.
Speaker 2: And it's just that I've lost a lot of friends,
Speaker 2: like from death and things flee.
Speaker 1: You're a clown, your clowns and what I mean by
Speaker 1: hold on hold on now? What I mean by that?
Speaker 1: What I mean by that you live in Oregon. There's
Speaker 1: gotta be other clowns in Oregon for you to go
Speaker 1: fucking clown around with. Have have you tried to go
Speaker 1: out and find people to clown around with?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I have. I grew up where I'm living now,
Speaker 2: so like I have, Okay?
Speaker 1: And And why has that has not? That that not
Speaker 1: been fruitful for you?
Speaker 2: No? Not, just I can't seem to make a lot
Speaker 2: of connections that last you know, it's like everybody's got
Speaker 2: opposite work schedule, or like they're going through their own
Speaker 2: ship or respond or they're performing at bars too much.
Speaker 2: And I just still am figuring out how I feel
Speaker 2: at bars as a person that doesn't want to drink.
Speaker 1: Is it hard for you to be in a bar
Speaker 1: at all?
Speaker 2: Sometimes? Sometimes it's not. Sometimes I tend to want to drink,
Speaker 2: and you know that's the biggy feeling. I want to
Speaker 2: drink when now it's going to come harm.
Speaker 1: Have you ever done any events of any kind where
Speaker 1: you have invited other people into your domain where you
Speaker 1: pick the venue and you sort of set the scene
Speaker 1: and invite people. Have you done anything like that?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 2: And it was successful once and we went and saw
Speaker 2: Corn and it was awesome.
Speaker 1: Okay, so it was successful and you saw Corn and
Speaker 1: it was awesome.
Speaker 2: It was.
Speaker 1: So why did you do it? Why have you never
Speaker 1: done it again? Why have we only done it once?
Speaker 1: It should be a recurring thing that awesome.
Speaker 2: Well, it was like Corn's farewell tours. And but me
Speaker 2: and that person don't hang out often because they're like busy,
Speaker 2: and I don't know, I don't know why we don't
Speaker 2: hang out more.
Speaker 1: Said you know you said, you said that you don't
Speaker 1: do it anymore because it's corn for because it's Corn's
Speaker 1: farewell tour, But flee. There are other things to do
Speaker 1: in the world besides the corn that you can do
Speaker 1: with your town people.
Speaker 2: That absolutely is. Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: It was just one person. It was just you and
Speaker 1: this other person going to see corn.
Speaker 2: It was me and on a friend of theirs that
Speaker 2: I just met that day. And it's actually funny enough.
Speaker 2: They was they worked down the street for me.
Speaker 1: Where do you live? You live an Oregon? Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: googling Oregon clown beat up right now.
Speaker 2: There's part I live live for.
Speaker 1: You are a clown and you live in Portland, Oregon
Speaker 1: and you're having trouble meeting people.
Speaker 2: It's like, well, I grew up here in Tuma, h.
Speaker 1: There was recently. There was recently the there was a
Speaker 1: fucking clown. I'm on Google right now. There was a
Speaker 1: clown the festival in Portland.
Speaker 2: I did not know.
Speaker 1: You got to put yourself out there here. Yeah, what
Speaker 1: is Box of Clowns dot Com? I'm on here. I'm
Speaker 1: like googling Portland clown ship for you right now?
Speaker 2: Thank you for me.
Speaker 1: What is Portland Portland clown There's a Portland clown bar.
Speaker 1: There's a Portland clown bar. What do you do? It's
Speaker 1: why are you calling my show? Go to the Portland
Speaker 1: clown bar right now? Look at this? Oh I forgot
Speaker 1: an I'm so, I'm dumb. I forgot. I forget it.
Speaker 2: I forgot it seems like a show maybe or if
Speaker 2: there's like it's okay, I understand. It's I used to
Speaker 2: be that I used to do. I mean, that's what
Speaker 2: I used to do.
Speaker 5: Go to park.
Speaker 2: I've been there. I got drunk there with people. I
Speaker 2: went to a birthday party, but I got really drunk
Speaker 2: and did a bunch of drugs and drunk around drunk.
Speaker 1: Okay, So your problem is that there are Your problem
Speaker 1: is that you you're a clown and you live in
Speaker 1: Portland and there's a bunch of fun clown Portland ship
Speaker 1: to do, but it's all at bars, and you feel
Speaker 1: like you're not at a point yet in your sobriety
Speaker 1: where you can be at a bar and not be
Speaker 1: very tempted to drink.
Speaker 2: It's hard to clown sober.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's hard to clown sober. You know, it's funny
Speaker 1: I have a friend who's a clown and she she's
Speaker 1: sober and she I'm dead serious. I have a friend
Speaker 1: who's a clown and she's sober, and she used she
Speaker 1: she she h, still finds a way to clown around
Speaker 1: in her sobriety.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a lot more to it that I don't
Speaker 2: want to There's a lot of really traumatic stuff that
Speaker 2: I don't want to talk about because the people, the
Speaker 2: people are listening, so you know it's gonna happen. I'm
Speaker 2: just like, how do I how do I like shake
Speaker 2: off the ick? You know of things that is to
Speaker 2: do because even though like I don't draw anymore, I
Speaker 2: barely draw it to any creative stuff.
Speaker 1: I'm on, I'm on uh okay, I'm on Facebook right now.
Speaker 1: Did you know that there's a monthly clown meet up
Speaker 1: in Portland? There's a monthly clown to meet Let's see
Speaker 1: where it is. If it's at a bar, then we're fucked.
Speaker 1: But let me.
Speaker 2: I mean I could I could maybe hang out at
Speaker 2: a bar, you know, I like mocktails. But it's just
Speaker 2: I don't understand people can't hang out outside, Like, why
Speaker 2: can't people do things outside of bars? I don't get it.
Speaker 2: That makes sense because we could drink it.
Speaker 6: Well.
Speaker 1: The reason why they do is because it is because
Speaker 1: people are afraid of each other, and alcohol makes you
Speaker 1: less afraid of people. It's not that's not it's not
Speaker 1: a great thing, but that is the answer to your question.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I also was told that I over communicate.
Speaker 1: Who told you? Who told you?
Speaker 2: A lot of people say that.
Speaker 1: You say that autism, Yeah, it might be an autism thing.
Speaker 1: Not sure in what? In what way? What do you
Speaker 1: what do? What do you feel like you over communicate?
Speaker 2: Like, I'm just I don't. I don't like there's certain
Speaker 2: the way people communicate where they don't say certain things
Speaker 2: because it's inappropriate, you know, like I'm just like too honest.
Speaker 1: Tell me the last time you felt to me, the
Speaker 1: last time you felt as though you over communicated something.
Speaker 2: I live with a bunch of men who don't clean,
Speaker 2: and I asked if they could please clean because I'm
Speaker 2: not their mother. And I feel like maybe I shouldn't
Speaker 2: have communicated it that way.
Speaker 1: Maybe they shouldn't have asked them, Like like you shouldn't
Speaker 1: have asked them at all if you could if they
Speaker 1: could clean. No, No, they should they shouldn't have made
Speaker 1: the comment about being their mother.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that part, because I feel like that's maybe maybe
Speaker 2: there's something traumatizing to say for someone I don't know,
Speaker 2: maybe they have some kind of cognitive they can't do
Speaker 2: things because they're also have a hard time. I don't know.
Speaker 2: I'm just trying to be like, why aren't they doing it?
Speaker 2: Just trying to find epathetic ways to talk about things.
Speaker 1: I wish my roommate when when I was in college,
Speaker 1: I wish my roommate would assume that I don't do
Speaker 1: the dishes because I have trauma. They were not as
Speaker 1: kind to me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well I've I've been doing communal living my whole life,
Speaker 2: and it's just like always been a source of problems.
Speaker 2: Not in this house. Surprisingly, but they don't like wipe
Speaker 2: their ship off the toilet. It's strange. They also, I don't.
Speaker 2: I just they do things like they put trash next
Speaker 2: to the trash can very confusing.
Speaker 1: Okay, you're afraid to you ever communicate, You don't want
Speaker 1: to be at bars, and you you do? You do
Speaker 1: you have any friends?
Speaker 2: That's the thing I've been I've been struggling with this
Speaker 2: and wondering, like what friendship means and like what like
Speaker 2: if you're not seeing people or hanging out with them
Speaker 2: but talking very often want my it's a friends And
Speaker 2: I grew up here, So it's really weird that people
Speaker 2: I know from here that I grew up around since
Speaker 2: for over ten years and we don't talk or see
Speaker 2: each other. And it's just like I'm on Instagram. I
Speaker 2: see things. Everybody's hanging out with each other and doing
Speaker 2: things I just don't. No, I don't know. I have friends.
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Are friends? How you said how many people do you
Speaker 1: live with?
Speaker 2: I live with four men and I am not I
Speaker 2: am a trans person.
Speaker 1: Okay, how are you? Are you on good? Are you
Speaker 1: friendly or friends with any of them? Or do you
Speaker 1: do you hate all?
Speaker 2: Yeah? One of them is like one of them is
Speaker 2: like the homie, Like I trust him, he's really he
Speaker 2: really likes my dogs. The other guys, I just met
Speaker 2: them when I moved in, so you know their roommates.
Speaker 2: One of them, I'm really uncomfortable around that.
Speaker 1: How long have you lived in Portland for.
Speaker 2: I have moved here at the beginning of COVID, and
Speaker 2: I don't know how long ago that's been.
Speaker 1: And then when did you when did you get.
Speaker 2: Sober like a year before I moved here? Okay, but
Speaker 2: I moved away from here to like over ten years
Speaker 2: ago because I grew up here.
Speaker 1: Okay, So you've been sober living, you've been sober for
Speaker 1: a long time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, for a while. And I'm not like straight edge,
Speaker 2: like I'm like, you know, California sober.
Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, dude, there's got to come on. There's got
Speaker 1: come on a Portland. There has got to be some
Speaker 1: fucking Facebook group of clowns that like to hang out
Speaker 1: and get high. Where is that that room? That room exists?
Speaker 1: I know it.
Speaker 2: Do you know how people don't like Portland? You know
Speaker 2: how people don't like Portland?
Speaker 1: You have the perception that people don't like Portland's because.
Speaker 2: It's like passive aggressive and there's tender queers and you know,
Speaker 2: there's me all over the internet. You could probably find
Speaker 2: them like like, you know, like I didn't do the
Speaker 2: dishes because and traumatized. Right, very Portland, right, you know,
Speaker 2: it's just people don't communicate here, and it's very you know,
Speaker 2: and I live in New Orleans. No Orleans is a
Speaker 2: very caring place, like people everybody talks to each other.
Speaker 1: Dam I want to find the group of folks wearing
Speaker 1: their clown outfits fucking heating up dabs.
Speaker 2: Honestly, I'm gonna be honest. Probably it's probably drag shows
Speaker 2: where it exists. Okay, Yeah, I've gone to a few
Speaker 2: of them. Yeah, it's usually at the bar, usually on
Speaker 2: the weekend. I work. I work on the weekend. It's always,
Speaker 2: like I just it's not accessible for people that can't
Speaker 2: stand for very long and work on the weekend. So
Speaker 2: it's just like a communities aren't built outside of alcohol culture.
Speaker 2: I guess I don't like. I don't really I've been
Speaker 2: struggling with that a lot, like trying to find how
Speaker 2: to be a part of things.
Speaker 1: Can I can I? Can I float something? Can I
Speaker 1: float something? By you?
Speaker 2: Of course?
Speaker 1: Of course, So you were telling me about when you
Speaker 1: went to Corn. Yeah, you hosted a big Corn event. Yes,
Speaker 1: all right, so you had it. The initiative existed within
Speaker 1: you to create your own experience based on what works
Speaker 1: for you and then invite other people into that experience.
Speaker 1: That is something you have successfully done before, even if
Speaker 1: it was only with two people. You've done it before.
Speaker 2: Thank you for telling you.
Speaker 1: Next, that's true, Okay, yes, it is true, So why
Speaker 1: don't you Here's what I'm saying. This is what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: What I'm saying to you, and what I've been thinking
Speaker 1: about this entire call is clowns who like to get
Speaker 1: high and hang out. There's got to be at least
Speaker 1: there's got to be at least two hundred clowns who
Speaker 1: like to get high and hang out in the city
Speaker 1: of Portland, Oregon, but probably more. And I beg if
Speaker 1: you I don't know how? Actually I do know. I
Speaker 1: do know how Facebook, meet up, Instagram. If you I
Speaker 1: just like I guess the potential exists for you to
Speaker 1: be entrepreneurial about this and create your own club, because
Speaker 1: that's what you do. Because listen, everyone who's listening to this,
Speaker 1: just that's what you When when there are all these
Speaker 1: clubs out there and you don't fit into them because
Speaker 1: you don't drink, or you don't identify as this, or
Speaker 1: you're not this, or you're not that, or you can't
Speaker 1: do that, what you do if they don't let you
Speaker 1: into the club? What do you do? Flee? What do
Speaker 1: you do every time the people are letting you into
Speaker 1: the clubs because you can't go, you start your own club.
Speaker 1: You start the club. No, that's not what you do.
Speaker 1: You don't hang out about them. You start the club. Flee,
Speaker 1: So start the club. Start the clowns that like to
Speaker 1: get high at the Chuck E Cheese club. Whatever that is.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: So one of the chat said, grab life by the
Speaker 1: red honkin' those And I'm gonna second that.
Speaker 2: I don't wear a big nose.
Speaker 1: But yes, I mean, listen, that's just me telling you
Speaker 1: what to do. But what I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: Think about all I'm gonna I take I take your
Speaker 2: words very seriously, and I thank you very much. I'm
Speaker 2: having a very hard time just that's the whole madness
Speaker 2: of reality. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I hope that this phone call was made you feel
Speaker 1: at least a little bit more empowered to start start
Speaker 1: a club of some kind, because that's just what I'm getting.
Speaker 2: It's really funny you're saying, right, Okay, it's really funny.
Speaker 2: You're saying that's very funny. Oh great, I hope, I
Speaker 2: hope I could do that.
Speaker 1: Please. There anything else you want to say to the
Speaker 1: people at the computer before we go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I hope everyone else is doing okay. Also, because
Speaker 2: I know that we're all kind of going through it
Speaker 2: with our own stuff, really real out there.
Speaker 1: Flee one day, I'm going to poor I'm going to
Speaker 1: Portland next year, and when you're having your like you know, thirteenth,
Speaker 1: I'll show up.
Speaker 2: I'll show up as a Clinton.
Speaker 1: Please shop, please, shops, please please show up as a
Speaker 1: clown to the show that you in Portland.
Speaker 2: I shove nails in my head and do all sorts
Speaker 2: of stuff.
Speaker 1: Oh please please please show up and show up ready
Speaker 1: to do all of that, because I will call you
Speaker 1: on stage.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, cool. Oh and let's talk capitalism. Say again,
Speaker 2: fuck capitalism.
Speaker 1: Fuck capitalism. But also go to www dot therapice go
Speaker 1: dot com and buy my T shirts. Yes, thank you
Speaker 1: very much. Have a good night.
Speaker 6: Than Yeah.
Speaker 1: I liked Flee a lot. I I I you know,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm a I'm a huge believer of that. I'm
Speaker 1: a huge believer of that ship. Uh if you if
Speaker 1: you're looking around, you can't get into any of the clubs.
Speaker 1: Just start your own club. I don't know. And I
Speaker 1: and look, some people have problems doing that for whatever
Speaker 1: their reasons is, however legitimate those reasons are. But Flee
Speaker 1: hosted the fucking corn event. So I don't know why.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just maybe I'm being a dick,
Speaker 1: but I I just want I just want flee to
Speaker 1: I just know that there is a room of clowns
Speaker 1: getting high and hanging out and having a good time
Speaker 1: and poorland and I'm just over here ideating on how
Speaker 1: we get flee into that room and I hope they
Speaker 1: find it.
Speaker 7: Hello.
Speaker 1: Hello, how you doing.
Speaker 5: I'm doing good? How about you?
Speaker 1: What's your name, sir? My name is Brayden Branden Breden.
Speaker 1: What's your life like?
Speaker 2: Huh?
Speaker 5: Recently it's kind of been drama filled, but I mean
Speaker 5: other than that, I mean there's been a normal life.
Speaker 5: I mean ups and down.
Speaker 1: Okay, is there anything particular that you wanted to call
Speaker 1: and to talk about?
Speaker 5: Really? Just what you know life is like as a
Speaker 5: door dash driver. But there's one specific thing I wanted
Speaker 5: to talk about about when I delivered to a place
Speaker 5: that just had a shooting.
Speaker 1: What place just had a shooting that you delivered to?
Speaker 5: Yeah, like, right as I was delivering to it, there
Speaker 5: was a shooting.
Speaker 1: Well there was a okay, so there was a shooting
Speaker 1: in progress when you were delivering there.
Speaker 5: Yes, Like I picked up the food. The shooting occurred,
Speaker 5: and I got there before the cops did.
Speaker 1: That's extremely funny that the DoorDash driver can arrive before
Speaker 1: the police does.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's honestly kind of funny.
Speaker 1: So was there, Like, what tell tell me the story?
Speaker 5: So basically, I was just in my area. I deliver
Speaker 5: a lot of Chick fil A because that's what's most
Speaker 5: popular here, and I went to go in and pick
Speaker 5: it up, and I had I have to park in
Speaker 5: like a parking lot that's like besides Chick fil A,
Speaker 5: because it's just too busy to try to park in
Speaker 5: the Chick fil A. So, you know, I pick it up,
Speaker 5: I come back out and as I'm walking to my car,
Speaker 5: you know, I'm kind of parked on the side of
Speaker 5: a strip mall. And as I'm getting into my car,
Speaker 5: I hear a series of pops in the distance, and
Speaker 5: then I hear kind of like what sounds like a
Speaker 5: rock being thrown against the side of like the building.
Speaker 5: And I didn't really think much of it at the time.
Speaker 5: I was like, Oh, you know, it's just someone with
Speaker 5: their car, car exhausted in the distance. You know, it's
Speaker 5: not that big a deal. And you know, I have
Speaker 5: to drive across the street because I was delivering to
Speaker 5: the mall. And as I pull up into the mall,
Speaker 5: you know, I get the food. I start to walk in,
Speaker 5: and there's a bunch of people out, you know, out
Speaker 5: by the front being like, oh is it safe or whatever.
Speaker 5: I'm like, why are they asking that? And then I
Speaker 5: look over and there's a car with like a bullet
Speaker 5: hole through the windshield, and there were security car security
Speaker 5: guards outside like taking a bunch of notes and stuff.
Speaker 5: And this lady comes up and she's like, Oh, no,
Speaker 5: my shooting or my car has nothing to do with
Speaker 5: your shooting. You know, this is from a different one
Speaker 5: in a different town. I was like, wait, so she just.
Speaker 1: Drove up to the shooting. She just drove up to
Speaker 1: the shooting with a bullet hole in her car, just
Speaker 1: from a different shooting.
Speaker 5: From different instances.
Speaker 1: Yes, where do you live, man?
Speaker 2: I live.
Speaker 5: It's a place called Rocky Mount, North Carolina. If anyone
Speaker 5: knows North Carolina, my town is nicknamed Murder Mount. I mean,
Speaker 5: there's a shooting that happens like every other day.
Speaker 1: Wow. And I thought North Carolina was boring, not Rocky Mount.
Speaker 5: Okay, So at this time, at this time, it's still
Speaker 5: not you know, clicking in my head that uh, there's
Speaker 5: a shooting that happened. And you know, I'm walking in,
Speaker 5: a bunch of people are standing at the doors being like,
Speaker 5: I'm not coming out. Do I know it's safe. I'm like,
Speaker 5: what the world is happening? And I go in, I
Speaker 5: deliver the food, I start to walk out, and then
Speaker 5: I see like fifteen cop cars with all of their
Speaker 5: lights on, just all over the parking lot and they
Speaker 5: are like completely sectioning off a section of the parking lot.
Speaker 5: As I'm walking out, they are doing it, and I'm like,
Speaker 5: what the hell just happened? And I go and ask
Speaker 5: someone next to me and they're like, oh, shooting just happened.
Speaker 5: I was like just now and they're like yeah, So
Speaker 5: I'm guessing that rock that I heard hit the side
Speaker 5: of the building I was at was actually a bullet
Speaker 5: that was flying over my head.
Speaker 1: Does this kind of thing happen to you often when
Speaker 1: you are door dashing around?
Speaker 6: Like?
Speaker 1: Is do you just live in a generally unsafe area?
Speaker 5: Well, I don't live here. I live in a different area.
Speaker 5: I just come here for work. But some of these
Speaker 5: things do happen. Yeah, because I was. There was another
Speaker 5: instance of where I was going to the Walmart to
Speaker 5: pick up an order and there was another shooting that
Speaker 5: happened there, but the cops got there before I did
Speaker 5: and completely sectioned off the parking lot so you could
Speaker 5: not get in. And literally one stop light saved me,
Speaker 5: because if I was like thirty seconds, you know, ahead
Speaker 5: of where I was, I would have been in there
Speaker 5: when they sectioned off the parking lot.
Speaker 1: Oh and you would have just been stuck inside of
Speaker 1: the parking lot.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I would have been stuck inside the parking lot
Speaker 5: because they didn't let anyone out of the parking lot
Speaker 5: for like two hours.
Speaker 1: Wait, So that doesn't make sense. And I don't know
Speaker 1: if either of us are going to know what we're
Speaker 1: talking about here, but if there's a like an active
Speaker 1: shooter in a Walmart, why would they not let people
Speaker 1: out of the parking lot. Is it because they're like
Speaker 1: suspects or something.
Speaker 5: I think that's what it was. I think they thought
Speaker 5: that some that the shooter was still in the parking lot,
Speaker 5: so they were trying to keep them from going away.
Speaker 5: But they don't really take it too seriously because you know,
Speaker 5: it happens like every other day, and they like to
Speaker 5: say that it's a controlled shooting because they're not like
Speaker 5: shooting random people. They're like people that are actually going for.
Speaker 1: Do you get tipped, well.
Speaker 5: Unfortunately no. I mean some warders are good, some warders
Speaker 5: are also bad. I usually don't like to work after dark.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, I wouldn't too if I were yell.
Speaker 5: There's also a bunch of crackheads in my area. There's
Speaker 5: one he calls himself crackhead Joe.
Speaker 1: Crackhead Joe. Have you spoken with him?
Speaker 7: I have.
Speaker 5: I've spoken with him on different occasions. One of them.
Speaker 5: I didn't really talk to him in this instance, but
Speaker 5: he was in the same restaurant I was picking up
Speaker 5: from and this old lady came in to order and
Speaker 5: he just kind of he looks at her, and then
Speaker 5: he looks at me, and he looks back at her.
Speaker 5: He goes, hey, man, do you know who I am?
Speaker 5: She just looks at him and she goes, I don't
Speaker 5: know who you are, sir, and he just yells, I'm
Speaker 5: crackhead Joe. And then he runs out of the restaurant
Speaker 5: and runs down the road. And I think that's the
Speaker 5: last time I saw him.
Speaker 1: Do you think there is like, I mean, do you
Speaker 1: think there is some kind of clout to be gained
Speaker 1: from being like the crackhead of the area that he
Speaker 1: was kind of trying to capitalize on when he was
Speaker 1: talking to that woman, And maybe that's what that was.
Speaker 5: I mean, I think there could be some kind and
Speaker 5: also maybe if he got on like social media, he
Speaker 5: could have been like an influencer. But he was like
Speaker 5: seventy years old. He might have been younger, but you know,
Speaker 5: the crack kind of you know, accelerates in the aging process.
Speaker 1: Well it's interesting because I think, you know, people in general,
Speaker 1: it's it's people. There's a desire for an identity of
Speaker 1: some kind, whatever that identity may be, and maybe he
Speaker 1: was looking for it was like yeah, yeah, and he
Speaker 1: was like this could be you know, everyone wants to
Speaker 1: have a thing, like, you know, like I'm the gecko guy.
Speaker 1: You know, some people are like, oh, I'm a skateboarder.
Speaker 1: I love to see you know, I define myself by
Speaker 1: skateboarding and crackhead Joe. I don't know. I don't know
Speaker 1: crackhead Joe, and I wouldn't call him. It sounds to me,
Speaker 1: I think it is offensive to call him crackhead Joe.
Speaker 1: But I think it sounds to me like he like
Speaker 1: that's what, that's what he denotes himself as that if
Speaker 1: he's like if he if he calls himself that, I'm like,
Speaker 1: all right, I'll, you know, call you whatever you want
Speaker 1: me to call you. And it could be something that
Speaker 1: pride out of. But I don't know.
Speaker 5: Say that again, I said, is he is it really
Speaker 5: offensive if he wants to be called it? I mean
Speaker 5: it's kind of like, you know, like I'm trying to
Speaker 5: think of another famous person like the Rock kind of
Speaker 5: likes to be called the Rock, and crackhead Joe just
Speaker 5: wants to be called crackhead Joe.
Speaker 1: I'm glad he found his land.
Speaker 5: Yeah, at least he's happy.
Speaker 1: Well, we don't know that, but Brandon, is there anything
Speaker 1: else you want to say to the people of the
Speaker 1: computer before we go?
Speaker 5: I guess just try to be safe and if you
Speaker 5: hear something that she thinks of car exhausts, it may
Speaker 5: not be a car exists. And they being activeputing.
Speaker 1: We learned new things every day on the Therapy Gecko podcast.
Speaker 1: Thanks for calling man.
Speaker 5: All right, thank you have a good day.
Speaker 7: Hello, Hello, Hello, is this low?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Who's this?
Speaker 6: This is Colin?
Speaker 1: What's going on with you? Colin?
Speaker 6: How much? How you doing?
Speaker 2: Man?
Speaker 1: I'm a get go on the computer?
Speaker 6: Yeah you are?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so Colin? So Colin, what's up? What? Why did
Speaker 1: you call me? Why the fuck did you call me? Colin?
Speaker 1: You tell me right now, You tell me right now
Speaker 1: before I throw a fit. I'm pissed off, Colin. No,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm sorry. I don't know why I
Speaker 1: did any of that. Just now. What's going on? Conn
Speaker 1: Tell me everything? Tell me nothing?
Speaker 6: Well?
Speaker 8: I called in because for like years now, I've had
Speaker 8: this mindset where it's not to explain, but essentially, like
Speaker 8: I'm in college right now, I'm neat a pretty good
Speaker 8: amount of people, and I usually find myself judging them
Speaker 8: pretty quick. But like and like, I know that's not
Speaker 8: really good to do, but I find myself proving myself
Speaker 8: right about judging them a lot. And so I'm in
Speaker 8: this conflict of like, do I try and be upen
Speaker 8: minded and then like end up proving myself right or
Speaker 8: do I just stick with my judgments because usually I
Speaker 8: feel like I don't know, Like I'll give an example,
Speaker 8: I feel like I'm not explaining it poorly.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, well no, no, no you're not. I don't think
Speaker 1: you're an explain it for but I would love to
Speaker 1: hear the example.
Speaker 8: So a common thing that I experienced is meeting a
Speaker 8: lot of kids that were brought up really well and
Speaker 8: like really fortunate with their circumstances, and like they're nice
Speaker 8: and all, but I've learned like ninety nine percent of
Speaker 8: the time, like I don't know, like they're gonna be
Speaker 8: like rude or like they're gonna have some kind of
Speaker 8: like glaring character flaw. Like I have a lot of
Speaker 8: people who I was friends with and then you know,
Speaker 8: I was hanging out with them and their friends and
Speaker 8: then they treat you completely different. Or like I work
Speaker 8: in the service industry and a lot of these people
Speaker 8: will like treat me really badly just because like I'm working,
Speaker 8: and so I find myself just in like normal day
Speaker 8: to day meeting similar types of people, and I just
Speaker 8: kind of like I don't really treat them like I'll
Speaker 8: have any kind of friendship with them, Like I immediately
Speaker 8: call it off in my head, okay, And when I
Speaker 8: don't do that, I just find myself doing it anyways,
Speaker 8: you know what I mean?
Speaker 6: Does that make sense.
Speaker 1: When you yeah, when you say that you judge people
Speaker 1: a lot, I mean, what judgments are you typically making
Speaker 1: about people?
Speaker 8: Just that like there they'll be like a crummy person
Speaker 8: or like selfish or like rude, like a lot of
Speaker 8: like common negative character traits. If that makes sense.
Speaker 1: Yeah, let me think here, I do you talk, like
Speaker 1: how soon into talking to people are you making these judgments?
Speaker 8: Not like in five seconds? Probably, Like say I have
Speaker 8: like a class with someone where we have a group project,
Speaker 8: and I'll work with them for like forty five minutes,
Speaker 8: for like an hour. Usually at some point in there,
Speaker 8: like I find that like I can base off of
Speaker 8: maybe how they present themselves or how they talk, or
Speaker 8: how like they'll treat people in the group. But like
Speaker 8: I can kind of gauge that they're this type of
Speaker 8: person that I've described, and like I'll just kind of
Speaker 8: calm off from there and like digest work with them
Speaker 8: in that group project.
Speaker 6: Okay, kind of display a lot of Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have since thought I have some thoughts on this.
Speaker 1: I think one of the one of the best things
Speaker 1: I've ever heard. That was a lot one of the
Speaker 1: best things I ever heard. It was a good thing
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's one of the best things
Speaker 1: I've ever heard, But I heard this thing that someone said,
Speaker 1: maybe it was Mark Manson or someone They were like,
Speaker 1: you know, uh, it is not people's job to present
Speaker 1: all of their best, most interesting, wonderful qualities to you,
Speaker 1: because that it's not in your control whether or not
Speaker 1: they do that. It is your job to uh again,
Speaker 1: in working with what is within your control, to find
Speaker 1: uh and perceive the things about other people that are redeeming,
Speaker 1: interesting and positive. So uh, it sounds to me like
Speaker 1: you're approaching people with this inherent negative perspective of them
Speaker 1: or like your you know, you know you ever heard
Speaker 1: the term confirmation bias.
Speaker 8: I can't say I have.
Speaker 1: Actually, it's like it's like if you're talking, like if
Speaker 1: you're in a group project some guy and you know
Speaker 1: he's maybe he's wearing like a nice shirt. You're like, oh,
Speaker 1: this guy's wearing a nice shirt, he must be an asshole.
Speaker 1: You're now going out in your brain. You're now trying
Speaker 1: actively to you're biasedly attempting to perceive things about him
Speaker 1: that confirm your suspicion that he's an asshole. Does that
Speaker 1: make sense? So if you were to just wipe your
Speaker 1: brain blank, or if or even better, if you were
Speaker 1: trying to approach the world in some sense of you know,
Speaker 1: most people are good, most people do have redeeming qualities,
Speaker 1: most people are acting kindly, most people This that whatever
Speaker 1: positive things your confirmation bias would work, then the other way,
Speaker 1: where you would actually go out of your way to
Speaker 1: perceive things about people that confirm your bias, that you know,
Speaker 1: they're nice or they are friendly, or whatever it is.
Speaker 1: And the choice at the end of the day remainds
Speaker 1: is yours as to how you want to see the
Speaker 1: world and how you want to see you want to
Speaker 1: see people, because so much of it is about like
Speaker 1: the mindset, you know. And so if you decide not
Speaker 1: even because you know, if you decide just because you
Speaker 1: want to live in a better version of the world
Speaker 1: where people are nice, you just decide that people are nice,
Speaker 1: that people are a certain way, whether people are interesting
Speaker 1: or the people have redeeming qualities, or that people are
Speaker 1: just trying their best. And you go out in the
Speaker 1: world and you are now perceiving things in a way
Speaker 1: that are trying to confirm that bias. Uh, maybe you'll
Speaker 1: you'll kind of solve this issue that you have of
Speaker 1: judging people too fast. Does any of what I just
Speaker 1: said make sense?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Yeah, that's uh. I actually love that. That's extremely insightful.
Speaker 8: I've never might be a surprise, but I've never really thought.
Speaker 6: Of it like that.
Speaker 1: Okay, cool, good, good, Because here's the thing, the dude,
Speaker 1: I don't know. This is why I don't. I don't
Speaker 1: like labels and I don't I think there is a
Speaker 1: thing where we're villainizing people a lot, or we're saying, oh,
Speaker 1: if you're this, then you're that, or just all all
Speaker 1: this shit that is just a barrier against actually interacting
Speaker 1: with people and finding common ground with them. And uh,
Speaker 1: I think I think it's a good thing to try
Speaker 1: to get yourself out of, if that makes sense.
Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, no, one hundred percent degree. I I realized that,
Speaker 8: like it kind of comes off bad, but it's just
Speaker 8: it's tough. Like I completely agree with you, but it's
Speaker 8: always tough because like I'll try and like look for
Speaker 8: the nice things and people, and like I still just
Speaker 8: unfortunately end up like proving my judgments, right sure, yeah,
Speaker 8: And it's just like a daily toss up in my
Speaker 8: head because like I don't want to be that asshole
Speaker 8: that like these a dude like driving a red Mercedes
Speaker 8: and he's like a freshman in college and it's like
Speaker 8: brand new, and it's like okay, obviously, like your parents
Speaker 8: probably bought that for you, and like I try to
Speaker 8: like look and be like okay, maybe like he's just
Speaker 8: a really fortunate guy, but like he's really hard working
Speaker 8: and like he's kindly nice, and like he might even
Speaker 8: like help me in class. And then it's like nine
Speaker 8: out ten times I'll like meet that guy and it's like,
Speaker 8: oh no, yeah, he's actually an asshole. Sure yeah, And
Speaker 8: I realized like just picturing like typical rich kid, but
Speaker 8: it's it's like that with a lot of different people.
Speaker 1: Well, I think, well, first of all, none of what
Speaker 1: I'm saying means you have to be friends with anyone
Speaker 1: or that you have to spend time with anyone that
Speaker 1: you don't want to spend time with. I understand, you know,
Speaker 1: if you if you're spending if you're talking to this
Speaker 1: guy and he's you know, treating you in a way
Speaker 1: where it's like I don't think I want to be
Speaker 1: friends with this guy, or I don't think I want
Speaker 1: to spend time with this guy totally don't spend time
Speaker 1: with him or try to be friends with him in
Speaker 1: order to, like, you know, prove some hippie kumbay a
Speaker 1: piece thing. But in defense of the hippie kumbay a
Speaker 1: piece thing, I would say that, And I'm this is
Speaker 1: all stuff that like I'm trying to ascribe to myself
Speaker 1: and don't do a perfect job of. So I hope
Speaker 1: I don't sound like you know, I've I've mastered this
Speaker 1: way of thinking, because it's just kind of a recreational
Speaker 1: philosophy shit that I'm sure I contradict myself in my
Speaker 1: actions a lot all the time. But I mean, there's
Speaker 1: there's a thousand things about this guy driving the Mercedes
Speaker 1: that you don't know. You don't really know what his
Speaker 1: relationship with his family is, like, you don't really know
Speaker 1: what it was like growing up for him. You don't
Speaker 1: know if he's happy, you don't know what his problems
Speaker 1: that you don't like. You just you don't know anything.
Speaker 1: And that and that doesn't mean that every you know,
Speaker 1: rich kid driving a Mercedes is secretly this you know,
Speaker 1: troubled child. But it doesn't it doesn't mean anything. All
Speaker 1: it means is that you don't know, and so if
Speaker 1: you don't know, you cannot make the judgment.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I agree with you said, but I don't know.
Speaker 1: If you become friends with the kid, maybe he'll let
Speaker 1: you drive in his Mercedes and that would be kind
Speaker 1: of cool. So maybe you should be friends with him,
Speaker 1: or maybe he'll give you some money?
Speaker 6: True? True?
Speaker 2: Uh?
Speaker 1: Is anything? Oh no, please please, I want to hear
Speaker 1: your thoughts.
Speaker 8: I was I was just going to kind of agree
Speaker 8: with your point of like it's tough to be perfect
Speaker 8: about and and like, obviously you should jump the conclusions
Speaker 8: with people. But I think I agree with you. I
Speaker 8: think even if I prove myself right, it's probably worth
Speaker 8: it to look for the good things and people.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, And again, you know, if you're talking to
Speaker 1: a guy and he's like just being an asshole to you,
Speaker 1: doesn't mean you have to be his best friend. Doesn't
Speaker 1: mean you have to I mean, you don't have to
Speaker 1: do any of the shit. But for your own personal sake,
Speaker 1: of your own personal peace, I think you might be
Speaker 1: better off just understanding that you don't know anything about him. Really.
Speaker 8: Yeah, yeah, I think that's a much better way to
Speaker 8: stick by it.
Speaker 6: That's a much better.
Speaker 1: Mindset, Colin, Is there anything else you want to say
Speaker 1: to me or the people of the computer or God
Speaker 1: or SpongeBob before we go?
Speaker 8: Yeah, it's completely unrelated. But I'm in the process of
Speaker 8: kind of working on a business right now and it's
Speaker 8: really thrilling and I'm very passionate about it. So if
Speaker 8: you have a dream that you'd like to chase, you
Speaker 8: should for sure chase it.
Speaker 1: I like that. Thanks for calling Colin.
Speaker 6: Thanks for picking up how to go Man.
Speaker 1: Man, all those business kids, sure our assholes, aren't they?
Speaker 8: Now?
Speaker 1: I'm just kidding, Calm, Colin's con seems like a nice guy.
Speaker 1: But I don't know that either. You could say, Look,
Speaker 1: you could say the same thing about positive judgments, to
Speaker 1: be honest, not that I'm thinking about it, Like you know,
Speaker 1: say someone's being all nice and shit, you don't know
Speaker 1: what is going on with them. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: think that's the point of this whole cause I don't know.
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling, Calm. Hello, Hello, Hi, what's up?
Speaker 1: How can I get you today?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 3: I told Stage two different things. I don't know which
Speaker 3: one she thought was more interesting.
Speaker 1: Uh, well, forget about that. I'm forget about what you
Speaker 1: told anyone what as you are on the phone with
Speaker 1: me in this moment, do you desire to talk about?
Speaker 3: Well, man, I guess kind of fresh on my mind.
Speaker 3: Yesterday found out one of my friends died.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry to hear that died a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 3: I didn't know about it.
Speaker 1: You just found out yesterday and it happened a couple
Speaker 1: of weeks ago.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, Well, I didn't know the very well. He
Speaker 3: do you play D and D Dungeons and Dragon.
Speaker 1: I don't play it myself, but I know what it is.
Speaker 3: Okay, So he was he was a group of my
Speaker 3: friends DM, so he like ran the game, and he
Speaker 3: only played like three or four times. So I didn't
Speaker 3: know him very well. But he stopped responding to our
Speaker 3: messages in our Discord chat. It's been like a month,
Speaker 3: so I thought he just didn't want to play anymore,
Speaker 3: and he's just kind of ghosting us, you know. I
Speaker 3: just assumed that he was like being an asshole. But
Speaker 3: then I got a message on Discord claiming from his
Speaker 3: brother that he was dead. But like, he didn't use
Speaker 3: his real name, he used his Discord name, so I
Speaker 3: just assumed he was lying. And and then I woke
Speaker 3: up his name and and find his obituary and he
Speaker 3: died like he died on campus, like in the engineering building.
Speaker 1: He died on the campus that you you go to
Speaker 1: college on.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, were you close with this guy at all? I
Speaker 1: know you said you only played with him a couple
Speaker 1: of times, but I mean, did you have any kind
Speaker 1: of like relationship.
Speaker 3: I met him like four times just to play D
Speaker 3: and D I extent I knew of him with his
Speaker 3: first name. So it is kind of weird.
Speaker 1: Okay, this seems to be and it could be in
Speaker 1: a personal sense, it could be in a existential sense,
Speaker 1: it could be in any kind of sense, but this
Speaker 1: does seem as though it's affecting you in some way. Yeah,
Speaker 1: how are you feeling about him?
Speaker 3: I feel really bad for assuming that he was being
Speaker 3: an asshole when he was dead.
Speaker 7: M hm hm.
Speaker 3: And so I got like I was talking about it
Speaker 3: in class because I didn't see the text until yesterday morning,
Speaker 3: and I was in the middle of class, so I
Speaker 3: was telling people about it, and then like the whole
Speaker 3: class got involved, and they're like, dude, what if this
Speaker 3: guy's actually dead? And then I find out he's dead
Speaker 3: and they're like, oh, man, you're a horrible person because
Speaker 3: I didn't believe it, and I just feel really bad
Speaker 3: about it.
Speaker 1: Your classmates told you that you're a horrible person.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I just I thought he was making it up. Like,
Speaker 3: how am I supposed to expect someone who hasn't message
Speaker 3: in a month, is uh, you know, dead and not
Speaker 3: just ghosting us.
Speaker 1: No, there's no room to assume anything or not assume
Speaker 1: anything that didn't make sense. There's no room to assume anything. Yeah,
Speaker 1: do you why do you?
Speaker 6: Do?
Speaker 1: You feel like a horrible person.
Speaker 4: A little bit?
Speaker 3: I feel bad about it?
Speaker 1: M hm, Well, I mean, listen, man, I don't think
Speaker 1: that it was of you to be able to assume
Speaker 1: that he was dead, right, and also the idea that
Speaker 1: you know he was ghosting you and that you were
Speaker 1: upset by that, that's an idea that comes from wanting
Speaker 1: to hang out with him, which is a good thing.
Speaker 1: So no, I don't think that makes you a horrible person.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just yeah, I mean, you can't expect to
Speaker 3: do his own nineteen. Yeah, you can't just like assume
Speaker 3: people are dying when they don't answer.
Speaker 4: So I don't know.
Speaker 1: How Uh, Now you have friends who are friends with
Speaker 1: this guy. You have mutual friends with him?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, other powers in their.
Speaker 1: D and D session, And how have they reacted to this?
Speaker 3: They didn't believe it either until we found the obituary
Speaker 3: for this dude.
Speaker 1: Do we know how he died?
Speaker 3: The bituary said breathing problems, like he had trouble breathing.
Speaker 3: You know that could be anything.
Speaker 1: H m hm. How are you feeling talking about this?
Speaker 1: You sound you sound upset.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I guess it's kind of put
Speaker 3: in perspective. Some of my my other friends have been
Speaker 3: trying to catch up with him, because you know, all
Speaker 3: these people I haven't talked to in months. You know,
Speaker 3: I don't know what's on none of them either.
Speaker 1: Interesting. Tell me more about that, this perspective that it's
Speaker 1: given you on other things.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess. I guess I want to make sure
Speaker 3: my other friends are dead. You know, it's not something
Speaker 3: I ever thought about. I've never had like a like
Speaker 3: a close family member die, so I don't really know
Speaker 3: how to.
Speaker 4: Deal with death.
Speaker 1: M So this is making you want to reach out
Speaker 1: to other friends that you haven't spoken with in a while. Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 1: I think that's a I think that's a good takeaway
Speaker 1: from this. You know, it's obviously very sad, but I'm
Speaker 1: I'm glad that it's given you a sort of awareness
Speaker 1: of the fragility of your relationships, you know, because you
Speaker 1: really do never know when a person you ever talked
Speaker 1: to in a while, whether whether they are AFK or
Speaker 1: you know, if they if they're gone.
Speaker 4: All right, Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: What's your name again, Daniel, Daniel, Daniel. I'm sorry to
Speaker 1: hear about your friend, man, thank you for calling.
Speaker 4: Daniel, Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1: I like Daniel. He's a nice guy. I hope that
Speaker 1: that was sad to hear about his friend. I do hope.
Speaker 1: I hope it inspires him to, yeah, to wanna catch
Speaker 1: up with old friends. Now I'm thinking about my old
Speaker 1: friends that I haven't seen in a long time, and
Speaker 1: how Yeah, it's weird. Anything could happen. Check up on
Speaker 1: your homies, man, check up on your homies. You never
Speaker 1: know what's going on. You can never really assume anything.
Speaker 1: That's another that's a this is I guess a lesson
Speaker 1: an assumption perhaps could be and to not do it.
Speaker 2: The kid goes on the line taking your phone calls
Speaker 2: every night.
Speaker 7: Never be Kid goes to What a Ride.
Speaker 8: He's teaching you Cloud in the Memorial Life.
Speaker 1: But he's not really an expert.