Speaker 1: Hold up, because what's the definition of shelving this? Could
Speaker 1: you could? You could? You could? You could hold let me,
Speaker 1: let me get the misogynist. A misogynist is worse than
Speaker 1: the shows. A missigetist. Don't give you massages, oh massuits,
Speaker 1: massage my knee. Uh see, she knows a massages massage
Speaker 1: of this giving massages here trying to interrupt you here, bullshit,
Speaker 1: hec you're trying to call here to talk about his
Speaker 1: truth because you know, you know he tried to call
Speaker 1: me during that. I gotta talk to you about that.
Speaker 1: Like you see, I'm going inline and you don't call me?
Speaker 1: What you mean an attitude of superiority towards members of
Speaker 1: the opposite sex, so it could be women or hold that,
Speaker 1: repeat that, repeat. What is cheval is precutice, belief in
Speaker 1: the superiority of one's own gender, group or kind. So
Speaker 1: being that this is no sellings, I'm I'm I'm, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm low man, Peter Boston, the low you're on the mic.
Speaker 1: We're good, we lie, we hid them. So is it
Speaker 1: fair to call what what's the what's what's uh? What's masculinity?
Speaker 1: So is it fair to call your solving this is
Speaker 1: that a real definition. Do you feel like your prejudice
Speaker 1: muk no, No, because prejudice. Look this up. Prejudice means like,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm kind of developing opinion or a hate towards
Speaker 1: women without any experience. That's what prejudice is. Prejudice is
Speaker 1: when I say something that's based on I don't even
Speaker 1: have to have experience with them. Everything we're talking about
Speaker 1: has to do with experiences. So it's personal experiences that
Speaker 1: we're talking about. It's it's certainly profiling, but it's not.
Speaker 1: But it's not, it's not prejudice. Yeah. Yeah, So I
Speaker 1: am profile. So mom, you called me the profile guy
Speaker 1: you call a profile and masculinity. So my man moved.
Speaker 1: My man, SP's up? What's that? Man? Was going on? Brother,
Speaker 1: we're getting in more trouble. So I did your podcast right,
Speaker 1: and my childhood friend right that I grew up with.
Speaker 1: She's married and everything she said listening to y'all podcast
Speaker 1: was like being in the orgy and unwarned, unwarned, Like
Speaker 1: she just stumbled in the room into an orgy and
Speaker 1: me and nothing on her face. Yeah that's beautiful, man,
Speaker 1: nothing on another woman's face. Her specific like all the
Speaker 1: men got into an accidental orgy and ain't got nothing
Speaker 1: in your face. That's that's how that's how that stop.
Speaker 1: That's how much testosterone she must have felt. That podcast
Speaker 1: was there, and I like that. I like that ask
Speaker 1: a question, That's what I invite. Yeah, what is wrong
Speaker 1: with test stops the wrong or the male's opinion, or
Speaker 1: even hearing the male's opinion. I felt like when we
Speaker 1: did our podcast, we were trying to give that energy
Speaker 1: to the women so they understand what we what we feel,
Speaker 1: because I feel like a lot of women don't even
Speaker 1: know what men feel because they don't really give a
Speaker 1: funk and a lot of instancetes, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Women really care how men feel? I think so. I
Speaker 1: don't think they care, but I think they're interested. And
Speaker 1: we're gonna give it to him every time. That's for
Speaker 1: show you our show, That's what you're gonna get every time.
Speaker 1: But do you think women care about how men feel? No, honestly,
Speaker 1: I honestly don't think they care. And and and what
Speaker 1: I mean by that I'm talking about like honestly, well,
Speaker 1: let me make sure I clarify myself. I think that
Speaker 1: on the level in relationships. Uh. I think when they
Speaker 1: not a relationship, they do a lot of talking, consulting
Speaker 1: and all that ship they want to they want to
Speaker 1: hear how we think they want to hear our perspectives.
Speaker 1: You know, I guess I don't think that. I don't
Speaker 1: think they give a funk how we actually feel though
Speaker 1: about ship. I think they want to use that ship
Speaker 1: as ammunition in a relationship, and if they're not in
Speaker 1: a relationship, they're like, fuck it, let's and then I
Speaker 1: guess it's still ammunition. It's like, let's see what the
Speaker 1: other side is doing. Let's see what the other funding
Speaker 1: side is doing. So when I do get a motherfucker,
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm ahead of the curve and I
Speaker 1: can you know, That's why I think a lot of
Speaker 1: this ship is dysfunctional me because a lot of times
Speaker 1: it's coming from second hand information or oh I got you.
Speaker 1: Have you ever heard met a women that say I
Speaker 1: grew up around a lot of dudes, so I gotta
Speaker 1: all my friends, all my my my, my best friends
Speaker 1: are male, and then they come at you with some
Speaker 1: bullshit racist like a racist person. My friend is I
Speaker 1: gotta black friends? You know, shut the door, Shut the
Speaker 1: door fall back up. Yeah, So, um, do I think
Speaker 1: women care about Do I think women care about how
Speaker 1: we feel? H I want to believe So I think
Speaker 1: I do. That was spoken like a true woman. Damn here,
Speaker 1: I want to believe. Women always want to believe something
Speaker 1: you hear. I'm not sure. I'm genuinely trying to think
Speaker 1: do they care about man? Like, the more I was talking,
Speaker 1: even when I was giving you my answer, I had
Speaker 1: to like kind of think like, no, they don't give,
Speaker 1: only to the extent that how we feel impacts them
Speaker 1: getting what they wanted exactly. So I just pragmatic sympathy.
Speaker 1: It's pragmatic sympathy. Words are y um um ship okay,
Speaker 1: because I feel like the thing that I do like
Speaker 1: about your ship, right is I like the fact that
Speaker 1: in today's time, is not the ship to be a
Speaker 1: straight up man. If you're not soft, if you're not
Speaker 1: bending over for whatever the cause is, motherfucker's is treating
Speaker 1: you like something is wrong with you, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? Like, like I always say that to women,
Speaker 1: like stop making these men compromise, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: The worst thing you can have is a floppy, flexible man.
Speaker 1: You want your man stern and solid and straight. But
Speaker 1: I feel like women. I do feel like women want
Speaker 1: you to give them a side of you that everybody
Speaker 1: else hasn't had mhm right, and decide that they're supposed
Speaker 1: to give you usually other people had. If that makes sense,
Speaker 1: It makes a lot of sense because with that, the
Speaker 1: thing that they're supposed to offer us, it's something in
Speaker 1: two thousand twenty one that nine who you ask, they're
Speaker 1: they're offering all sorts of other marginally valuable values. Marginally marginally.
Speaker 1: He is fucked up this this dude, I love that.
Speaker 1: I'm that's one of my new best friends, Pete is
Speaker 1: called you know, you know, I want to touch on
Speaker 1: this just for having us on here, and you're saying that, um,
Speaker 1: they want us to do certain things, like they want
Speaker 1: us to be great communicators. You know a lot of
Speaker 1: him and say that I need you to communicate. I
Speaker 1: need you to do this, you know. And some of
Speaker 1: them got to understand this, and not all dudes is this,
Speaker 1: but you know we I come. I gotta street background,
Speaker 1: you know, and certain folks got it. You don't even
Speaker 1: have to have a street background. Let me let me
Speaker 1: make sure that's understood. You don't even have to have
Speaker 1: a street background. As men, we've been known not to talk.
Speaker 1: We've been known don't tell on people. Uh, don't snitch,
Speaker 1: uh you know, don't cry, don't don't don't so and
Speaker 1: just hope that don't don't tell them your background and education, Well,
Speaker 1: because I don't want you just to be because people
Speaker 1: will hear you black crip giving this unwarned opinion. Well,
Speaker 1: y'all got my masters in psychology, right, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? Back to that, back to the don't don't
Speaker 1: don't keep that going? Well, yeah, because you know, you know,
Speaker 1: as growing up as males is, don't do this, don't
Speaker 1: tell on people, don't talk, uh, don't cry. So then
Speaker 1: when we're getting these relationships, like you said, a female
Speaker 1: is asking us now to break that. And we've been
Speaker 1: doing that longer than we're being even around you. So
Speaker 1: we've been not talking, we've been not telling and not
Speaker 1: giving up information right for all however many years it
Speaker 1: is prior to her. So you want us to break
Speaker 1: that habit, you know, So it's very hard for dudes
Speaker 1: to do that. You know, I gotta interject real quickly.
Speaker 1: They don't want you to break the habit. They want
Speaker 1: you to perceive them as so special that you want
Speaker 1: to break the habit. No, no, say it again, please repeat,
Speaker 1: repeat again. They don't want you to break the habit.
Speaker 1: They want you to perceive them as being so special
Speaker 1: that you want to break the habit. And that's that's
Speaker 1: a big difference. You're right, you're right. And the thing is,
Speaker 1: though it's hard, you know, coming up when you come
Speaker 1: up it from the streets, when you come up, just
Speaker 1: as a male, it's hard to break that habit for anything,
Speaker 1: even yourself, Like, even for yourself, it's hard to break
Speaker 1: that habit when you when you know you might know,
Speaker 1: guys have been y'all all have been in relationships and
Speaker 1: you probably have fucked them off. And in those relationships
Speaker 1: that you fucked off, you knew that it was probably
Speaker 1: something you could have did outside of what you did
Speaker 1: the fucking relationship off. But hommy, you was battling with ship,
Speaker 1: whether it was from your past, present, or whatever the
Speaker 1: case may be, you was battling with it just as
Speaker 1: a man like I can't. I can't do this. This
Speaker 1: ain't what men do. This ain't what I do. Like,
Speaker 1: I can't show you that I feel I can't show
Speaker 1: you that I'm crying. I can't do that. If I
Speaker 1: do that, she's gonna have a hunted Joe's funny you
Speaker 1: have a crowd in front of a girl, asked I
Speaker 1: have I have cried in front of a woman. I mean,
Speaker 1: so I'm gonna talk about crying since you just asked
Speaker 1: me that question. When I was younger, I couldn't cry
Speaker 1: for ship, even if it was like worthy of crying.
Speaker 1: You feel me like I was so hardened by my
Speaker 1: my upbringing, by my household and you know, hyper masculinity,
Speaker 1: hyper masculine pops, even a mom that was like super tough. Right,
Speaker 1: So really, you know, I don't believe any child it's
Speaker 1: born hard or wants to be hard. We developed that
Speaker 1: ship just to learn behavior, right, So for me, I
Speaker 1: would feel like, what the fund is wrong with? You?
Speaker 1: Asked like you you can't even cry in situations that
Speaker 1: you should be crying. You you feel bad, but your
Speaker 1: your core uh emotion is anger and that anger ran
Speaker 1: through me for like many years. You feel me where
Speaker 1: to where it fucked up relay ship ships and fucked
Speaker 1: up how I interact with people that I care about? Right?
Speaker 1: And so when I first was able to cry around
Speaker 1: a woman. To me, honestly, Bro, that ship was a
Speaker 1: liberating experience because like, I needed to do that. And um,
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna go too deep into this this one,
Speaker 1: but it was times where I just cried by myself
Speaker 1: and I just felt better. I just felt instantly better. Bro.
Speaker 1: And and I think the hypermasculinity that we have within
Speaker 1: us because we got to survive in the streets. You
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. You ain't gotta be a crip
Speaker 1: of blood, none of that. If you grew up, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, when we was really outside, you
Speaker 1: went from maybe not so hard to like, I gotta
Speaker 1: make my name. I gotta be a certain type of nigga.
Speaker 1: And you like my my cousin alluded to in one
Speaker 1: of our episodes. Man, we we got different characters. It's
Speaker 1: the reason my name is sp spog, whatever your name is, Glasses,
Speaker 1: that's mood. You know what I'm saying. Hear, but he's
Speaker 1: still a gangster. White people can cry, but it's cool,
Speaker 1: but like, but no, it's the reason why we have
Speaker 1: most on God, bro, Like, and I don't want and
Speaker 1: I don't want to cut you off. White people can
Speaker 1: cry like it's okay for white me and to cry.
Speaker 1: Kanye cried. Niggas thought he was losing his mind, but
Speaker 1: he was going through pay and everybody. But think about that,
Speaker 1: because like he cried on television at the thought of
Speaker 1: aborting his daughter. If he would have let his wife
Speaker 1: abhord his daughter, and he thought of a world without
Speaker 1: his kid, he cried. And the first thing, every motherfucking
Speaker 1: sister me and oh this nigga losing his mind. He
Speaker 1: That's why I don't believe when women, especially the sisters,
Speaker 1: say they are k with you crying in front of them.
Speaker 1: They're all gonna try to comfort and lie to you.
Speaker 1: But they do expect you to be stern, beyond belief,
Speaker 1: but at the same time floppy as a fucking disk
Speaker 1: emotional nigga. Kill you though, Think about what a woman
Speaker 1: asked of you, bro. They want you to be. We
Speaker 1: talked about this that day. They wanted to be organized confusion.
Speaker 1: There's there's a control element to that. I want you
Speaker 1: to be as vulnerable as you can possibly be with me,
Speaker 1: and I'm also at the same time gonna hold that
Speaker 1: against you. There's a there's a there's a certain power
Speaker 1: play there, that's a chessboard move, and they all will
Speaker 1: deny it. Like I've watched his story, like my man
Speaker 1: so asked. My whole experiences the exact opposite. I grew
Speaker 1: up everything could make me cry, and once I passed
Speaker 1: twenty nothing could make me cry, and it was a
Speaker 1: ton of worthy things to cry about. And I couldn't
Speaker 1: express myself that way. So even like I could communicate great,
Speaker 1: like can explain myself well, but if you're explaining like
Speaker 1: women say they want communication, they don't want communication. Women
Speaker 1: won't understand it. They don't want it to have a
Speaker 1: conversation where they may have to adjust what they think.
Speaker 1: They want you to feel what they're saying. So you
Speaker 1: don't really want to communicate. That's just not true. They
Speaker 1: be You know what the realist interaction ever captured on
Speaker 1: film between the man and one was it was Rosie
Speaker 1: Perez on white men can't jump or she didn't want
Speaker 1: to gossa. She wanted you to sympathize with dry mouthedness. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that and and and that goes back to the point
Speaker 1: I'm saying she didn't want to communicate when the man
Speaker 1: responded in simple because communication is a is a thing
Speaker 1: of language, right, is language. So we're talking to someone
Speaker 1: like in that movie white man can't drump right and
Speaker 1: white men can't jump. If you tell me you're thirsty,
Speaker 1: come communication. It's like, Okay, I got you. I'm going
Speaker 1: to get you some water. And then if you come
Speaker 1: back and tell me you don't want water, you don't
Speaker 1: want to communicate. That's how we talk. We have to
Speaker 1: use language because that we all understand it. They we
Speaker 1: all understand. They don't want to communicate, they want to
Speaker 1: be understood. And the problem with that is it's selfish,
Speaker 1: is fun, and it's very hard to understand somebody that
Speaker 1: does not effectively communicate. I mean that it's it's what's
Speaker 1: supposed to happen via diffusion, meaning a woman of the men.
Speaker 1: Either way, he just added a word that I need
Speaker 1: people to really focus on in the communication process. It's effective,
Speaker 1: you said, effectively communicating, And that is the big issue.
Speaker 1: Everybody communicates, you know, but if you really think about,
Speaker 1: nobody communicates effectively. But but again, I don't even think
Speaker 1: they're doing it ineffectively because it will require you to listen.
Speaker 1: No no, no, a communication no listen. Communication is communication?
Speaker 1: Is this if I go like this and wave and
Speaker 1: say hi. I communicate it. But but it requires like,
Speaker 1: so you have to listen. Women don't want to listen,
Speaker 1: they want to be heard, so listening right, So like
Speaker 1: me and my man low talk about this right. Clinically,
Speaker 1: the definition of listening is to listen. In so when
Speaker 1: somebody speaking with you is to list and then end.
Speaker 1: Women want to be heard. To hear is to acknowledge sound. Right.
Speaker 1: So that's why when you're talking to a woman, you
Speaker 1: could say something directly to them and they'll be like, well,
Speaker 1: it sounds like you said, feel me. They're acknowledging the
Speaker 1: sound of your voice. They're acknowledging the sound of the words.
Speaker 1: They're not listening, they're acknowledging sounds. That's why nine out
Speaker 1: of ten times women respond back with it sounds like
Speaker 1: you said, and not just women, people who are hearing
Speaker 1: and not listening. It sounds like you said, No, this
Speaker 1: is what I said because I use perfect English or
Speaker 1: slag because that you know all the definition of the words.
Speaker 1: But can I add perception to to this? Guys? Is
Speaker 1: because a lot of people they communicate and then they like,
Speaker 1: like if I'm talking to my cousin, I'm talking to you.
Speaker 1: The perception and and and on our show we talked
Speaker 1: about tone and delivery, but the perception of what you
Speaker 1: said we'll throw people off too, like they you might
Speaker 1: be thinking it one way and they receive it another way.
Speaker 1: And now we have a whole different debacle, Like we
Speaker 1: were on a whole different fucking conversation that we didn't
Speaker 1: we I didn't even plan it to be that. So
Speaker 1: now I'm in a situation where we're arguing about something
Speaker 1: that I didn't even really plan on arguing about. And
Speaker 1: that's the issue too, Like people have to be able
Speaker 1: to communicate with listening, understanding, you know, and and really
Speaker 1: take their fucking feelings out of this ship. People will
Speaker 1: be sensitive about everything sometimes to the point where it's
Speaker 1: like everything I say to you, you you're waiting for
Speaker 1: that you gotta trigger. But that's when triggered people. But
Speaker 1: that's because they're not listening. They're they're they're waiting to respond.
Speaker 1: If you're waiting to respond, you're not listening. Waiting to
Speaker 1: respond is actually an action. It's not like it's tough
Speaker 1: to listen and wait to respond, right, it's tough, right,
Speaker 1: So that's why they're looking to say something before you
Speaker 1: even end the lists. Listen, before you end the list.
Speaker 1: They're looking to respond. So people in head shout out
Speaker 1: to head, shout out to my djuse but he always
Speaker 1: say this, no, listen to what I'm saying. Stop what
Speaker 1: stop waiting to respond. So it's it's rough to communicate
Speaker 1: with two different styles of people. You feel me women
Speaker 1: and men are just very true from other planets. You
Speaker 1: feel me so And that's a big issue too, because
Speaker 1: we're not we're not the same. When do we get
Speaker 1: to a point where we start to like look at
Speaker 1: the other person and try to dive into and study them.
Speaker 1: That's but that's the ultimate growth, The ultimate growth, The
Speaker 1: final level of growth, I believe, right is when you
Speaker 1: just stop even giving the funk about what you think.
Speaker 1: When you stop giving a funk about what you feel
Speaker 1: as weird, does it sound all right? I'm sorry? I
Speaker 1: need you to, you know, because some people in the
Speaker 1: back they don't be hearing that. Repeat that again, those
Speaker 1: in the top of the bleachers day, in the top
Speaker 1: of the belief I'm sorry. Lines like that, they gotta
Speaker 1: get repeated. I think the ultimate growth is when you
Speaker 1: stop worrying about what you think and worrying about what
Speaker 1: you feel and start worrying about the other person. And
Speaker 1: and it's a tough place because it leaves you vulnerable.
Speaker 1: But everything great happens based around vulnerability. Even when I
Speaker 1: make music, the times I'm most vulnerable or put myself
Speaker 1: in vulnerable spaces is when the art is receiving in
Speaker 1: its greatest form and it's rewarded either with extreme emotion.
Speaker 1: So if we're talking about let's say two Park must die,
Speaker 1: it's gonna be some people who hate it, right, But
Speaker 1: then they have never given my art this much emotion.
Speaker 1: And the people who actually can catch on to what's
Speaker 1: going on are they're gonna respond in the all, men,
Speaker 1: you're a genius, This is brilliant, so you're gonna get
Speaker 1: the extreme of both. So I think, even when it
Speaker 1: comes to as men dealing with women, the ultimate growth
Speaker 1: is to stop worrying about what you think and feel
Speaker 1: because long as you have And that's why I said,
Speaker 1: it's rough to try to explain to them how you
Speaker 1: feel because you're asking them to come to around that
Speaker 1: they have no experience. Then you know, it's like asking
Speaker 1: your son too to play golf at Tiger Woods level,
Speaker 1: and he's never played golf, and women have never been meant.
Speaker 1: So I think for us, the smartest thing you could
Speaker 1: do is pretty much be like, all right, what do
Speaker 1: you think and what do you feel? Yeah? You said
Speaker 1: something interesting about like dealing with women, you know, And
Speaker 1: I think that in relationships, both man and women spend
Speaker 1: too much time trying to deal with the opposite and
Speaker 1: there's not a lot of a like bilateral attitude and
Speaker 1: agenda going in. It's what can we do to we
Speaker 1: want to do blank? How do we do blank? How
Speaker 1: do we accomplish that? And more worried about the individual
Speaker 1: parts of a hole than the actual hole itself. I
Speaker 1: think that's where a lot of relationships struggle. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't want to make so all the masculinity, but
Speaker 1: I'm saying it's just I think the more I think
Speaker 1: about it, I realized that ship where it's like, um,
Speaker 1: you you almost can't listen, because again, I think a
Speaker 1: woman wants to be heard. That's something that experience has
Speaker 1: taught me. They want to be heard. If you, like
Speaker 1: I said, if you try to listen, it's not gonna work.
Speaker 1: So I want to enter this and though they're like
Speaker 1: and this is kind of personal, but I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: say it, like I would never be in a relationship
Speaker 1: ever if like I look for that, I'm gonna look
Speaker 1: for that first. Are you willing to hear me? Are
Speaker 1: you willing to understand my background, my flaws? No? No, no,
Speaker 1: but I'm just give your hands up answering. I don't
Speaker 1: think that's true. I don't think that's it's true. That's true.
Speaker 1: It might be true, it's true, but they're not gonna
Speaker 1: understand anything. And let's not even say understand. Let me
Speaker 1: let me change the words and understand, like because I
Speaker 1: don't expect perfection because I know I'm sucking cold. I'm
Speaker 1: an asshole, so you're perfectly cold. I'm perfectly cold. But like,
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, are you going to
Speaker 1: even just hear me out? I don't even want you
Speaker 1: to understand because you said something earlier week. You know,
Speaker 1: we're two different species, were too, we're to two different
Speaker 1: types of people. But I don't want to never get
Speaker 1: into another situation where I'm being shut out, like you
Speaker 1: don't give a funk about what I'm talking about, Like
Speaker 1: everything is all the way on you you feel me.
Speaker 1: Everything is that. I mean, I don't want to be
Speaker 1: not I don't think the sisters is that bad though.
Speaker 1: I don't think they just I totally want to shut
Speaker 1: you out right. I just think they happen to value
Speaker 1: their agenda more than yours. But that's a that's bad
Speaker 1: because that's that. But see, see, because they want us
Speaker 1: to value that, they want us, they want us well, okay,
Speaker 1: so listen, all right, let me ask you. Let me
Speaker 1: let me see that. So, so Glasses, women always think
Speaker 1: they know best, and Glasses, but sorry, I just want
Speaker 1: to ask you one question, So Glasses, even when you're
Speaker 1: in a relationship, you committed, you're gonna be married, you're
Speaker 1: gonna be all of this. So you're you're fine with
Speaker 1: the fact that your women don't give a fuck about
Speaker 1: what you love, care about any of their ship I'm
Speaker 1: great enough to care for both of us. That's the
Speaker 1: attitude you have to have, the only it's the only
Speaker 1: attitude you can have. That you have to be great
Speaker 1: enough to care about your yourself and them. You can't
Speaker 1: expect them. It's it's yeah, go ahead, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying this to me. This is where it's sat
Speaker 1: because everything else about it, you know, everything else about
Speaker 1: it does not seem formidable. You know what I'm saying. Pew,
Speaker 1: you feel me like everything else about it doesn't walk there.
Speaker 1: So the the ultimate level is like you feel me
Speaker 1: like a right fuck it, I'm I'm not worried about you,
Speaker 1: worried about me, like worry about these things, and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna worried about both of us because it's like karate
Speaker 1: with it sounds like you got levels of you know,
Speaker 1: you got black belts because other than that, it got
Speaker 1: to be black belt because it if you don't. If
Speaker 1: you don't, you're always going to run into the same
Speaker 1: fucking problems because you're gonna always run into the same problems.
Speaker 1: And the way we are built to interact, feel me,
Speaker 1: we built differently. One thing, like I said, I love
Speaker 1: about what y'all represent, right, and this is knowing Uniga's right,
Speaker 1: Like I don't see you, nigga shrugging shoulders like you're
Speaker 1: a man all the time, no matter whether we're good
Speaker 1: or bad. And see that's not a normal thing because
Speaker 1: you know, we're in a society today where the whole
Speaker 1: goal is like, well, if you don't have this, then
Speaker 1: you're not a man. If you're not paying the rent,
Speaker 1: then you're not a man. If you're not successful or
Speaker 1: figured out, you're not a man. That's not true. You're
Speaker 1: a man. All this other stuff requires a different commitment
Speaker 1: of education or a thousand things, Like success is different.
Speaker 1: Like I was making a ton of money for the
Speaker 1: last ten years, I didn't feel successful probably for like
Speaker 1: ten of them. You know what I mean. I couldn't focus.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't buy furniture, I wouldn't go to the dentist.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't take care of myself because I got so obsessed,
Speaker 1: you feel me, I got so obsessed with conquering what
Speaker 1: I'm trying to conquer that all of these other things
Speaker 1: just didn't matter to me. And you can meet one
Speaker 1: girl right who is talking shipped to you a body,
Speaker 1: Oh you're my funck. Yeah, you can go to dnnis
Speaker 1: like making you feel like shit. And you could be
Speaker 1: another woman who's like, hey, what do we need to
Speaker 1: do to help make this happen for you? But that's
Speaker 1: her being concerned, and that's what I was talking about earlier.
Speaker 1: But I'm saying that's not even a consistence, Like it's
Speaker 1: just the type of women you feel me the type
Speaker 1: of women. It ain't like you're gonna meet thee. So
Speaker 1: the point I'm saying, because you're not even as a man,
Speaker 1: especially as a man man, you're not feel to be
Speaker 1: the woman that we're talking about, because women automatically just
Speaker 1: I don't want to just boxing me in because with
Speaker 1: all this, but they just kind of want to stand up.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Sometimes they feel like, I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe being black, you know, they felt like the world
Speaker 1: is pushing them down, so they want to stand up
Speaker 1: to you. Mhm, you understanding, which is where they want
Speaker 1: to stand up to you, like, that's the sisters want
Speaker 1: to stand up because but what else do they have leverage?
Speaker 1: That's true, It's true, which is probably why they whipped
Speaker 1: them kids ass like that somebody gonna respect me. But
Speaker 1: that's also what's wrong with some niggas who come home
Speaker 1: and beat on the lady because somebody gonna respect me.
Speaker 1: So I think the ultimate level of masculinity is knowing
Speaker 1: I could whoop your ass because I don't. I don't.
Speaker 1: I'm not the kind of guy that's gonna say, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't believe a man she hit a woman. If
Speaker 1: a me hit you with a close fist the first time,
Speaker 1: you should ask her, Hey, this is slap me. If
Speaker 1: you hit me with a close fist, I'm gonna ask you,
Speaker 1: is this what you wanna do? And then did you
Speaker 1: hit me the second time with the closest fist? No? No,
Speaker 1: if you hit me the second time with a closed fist,
Speaker 1: maybe I need to text Maybe I need to show
Speaker 1: you real fast that this ain't what you want. I No,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying because it's it's it's it's it's a
Speaker 1: some somewhere in in being a man, you know, masculine
Speaker 1: to being a masculine man. It's like, well, a real man.
Speaker 1: I never hit a woman. That's a lie, a real woman,
Speaker 1: and never hit a man because I ain't. Never let
Speaker 1: me tell you something. As a man, I'm a size up.
Speaker 1: Who the funk I'm gonna hit. I'm planning. If Mike
Speaker 1: Tyson cousins talking ship to me, hold on, rewind that
Speaker 1: as a man, you're gonna do what again? Rewind on
Speaker 1: this man because they don't understand it. I'm gonna thank
Speaker 1: for I move feel me. If Mike Tyson we had
Speaker 1: the restaurant, If I'm with if I'm with I'm at
Speaker 1: the motherfucking restaurant. Cause I'm at the restaurant and Mike
Speaker 1: Tyson is doing ship to me. I don't give a
Speaker 1: fucking brandy whoever the fund is right here, he doing
Speaker 1: ship to me and throwing ship and hit me with
Speaker 1: straws and sucking with me. I'm not gonna get up
Speaker 1: and fight cause I don't like my chances. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: figure out how to get to the car, get my gun,
Speaker 1: and make it even because this is you are a
Speaker 1: professional motherfucking fighter. Cause yeah, you are a professional fighter,
Speaker 1: and I don't like my chances. Now, don't get me wrong.
Speaker 1: You ain't supposed to punch on your old lady at
Speaker 1: the coffee hot. That's just weird that. But he that's
Speaker 1: the nigger acting like a bit. You punching on your
Speaker 1: because the coffee hot. That's because you ain't getting respect
Speaker 1: of other places. So you come on, this is the
Speaker 1: one motherfucker you rule up. So you you you missed,
Speaker 1: You you mistreated. That's like the only bad thing Pete
Speaker 1: about gang bangers because it's a very masculine thing too.
Speaker 1: It's a very chouvlistany thing too. The issue is it
Speaker 1: gives power to people who not used to have in power.
Speaker 1: Remember that it get power to Nick is not used
Speaker 1: to having power because and power is a special thing
Speaker 1: and if you don't know how to use it, you
Speaker 1: can misuse it and it's it's havoc. So it's important
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. When as a man, you
Speaker 1: you will your power correctly, and you can't trust any
Speaker 1: human being should be smart enough, especially a woman. Just
Speaker 1: size up what you are about to do. And if
Speaker 1: you don't, like I said on your podcast, if you
Speaker 1: start a fight with your man, feel me. If you
Speaker 1: start a fight with your man, know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: and you lose all the time. Your man is not
Speaker 1: uh abusive, You just can't fight, and you too stupid
Speaker 1: to not start to fight. You keep doing. An abusive
Speaker 1: man is somebody who hits on the woman. Feel me
Speaker 1: that that you know what I mean? That for no reason.
Speaker 1: But if you start a fight, if you're punching men
Speaker 1: in the face. First off, I'm not gonna lett nobody
Speaker 1: with my ask three times, right, So if I try
Speaker 1: to fight the nigga the first time and I'll win,
Speaker 1: pump myself up the second time. If I win the
Speaker 1: second time. The third time, I'm like, Okay, you know
Speaker 1: you can give me so if you come fucking with me,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna shoot you because you know you got me. So,
Speaker 1: I don't know. How would the woman start a fight
Speaker 1: with the nigger that could whip their ass over North Again,
Speaker 1: that's just dumb. And nobody's gonna make me feel like
Speaker 1: it's something wrong with that. Arguments over here. Man, I'm
Speaker 1: just not working with that. I'm not and and I
Speaker 1: don't give a funk which time society is in. I
Speaker 1: don't give a funk which period of society we're in.
Speaker 1: I don't give a fuck about what's the movement, the
Speaker 1: little Lady movement, me to Ship. I'm not working with
Speaker 1: none of that. I hate to meet Too. I don't
Speaker 1: hate him because I don't know him. I'm not taking
Speaker 1: that back. I'm not taking I'm not taking it back
Speaker 1: because it's it's a it's a movement like every other movement. Man,
Speaker 1: We're like false Ship could be involved in it, like
Speaker 1: mothercker get just jump in, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't. I don't know about the me
Speaker 1: too movement. I just don't funk with no movement that's
Speaker 1: strategic to one gender. Yeah, and it and and it,
Speaker 1: and it's a lot of fake ship going on with that.
Speaker 1: And then and the thing is it's like different situations
Speaker 1: to one gender, yeah, because it's like women are not.
Speaker 1: Like I'm not buying that a black woman have it
Speaker 1: worse than a black men, or black men have it worse.
Speaker 1: You black. I don't think a black trans person maybe
Speaker 1: got it more fucked up. I think black people in
Speaker 1: general got it sucked up. For me, we all. That's
Speaker 1: why I hated the all Black Lives Matter ship. I
Speaker 1: couldn't stand it because it's like, bro, you still black.
Speaker 1: You don't got to add another extra cut three letters.
Speaker 1: Oh I thought it was good because just a strategic
Speaker 1: and then I don't I'm gonna saying I'm not saying
Speaker 1: it was great because black lives matters. It's actually lame
Speaker 1: as fun. It's lame as fuck. If I have to
Speaker 1: explain to you as a man that my life matter,
Speaker 1: you're right, You're right. How could that be a movement
Speaker 1: my life matters? Who the funk are you telling that too?
Speaker 1: How did we go from black power? Because to how
Speaker 1: do how do we go from Black power to my
Speaker 1: life matters. It's certainly an indictment on the Black Power
Speaker 1: movement that it regrets so miserably in de spite of
Speaker 1: the evidence to the contrary of the time frame. But
Speaker 1: I mean, both Me Too and Black Lives Matter are
Speaker 1: deliberately constructed in an office in Century City at a
Speaker 1: PR firm, for sure, because they're they're designed for massive
Speaker 1: appeal and mallability. And we saw that come to fruition
Speaker 1: and it's it's weird like that, that's but that's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. It's like, so in a time where masculinity
Speaker 1: is not appreciated, it's don't see some brothers being me
Speaker 1: And he said, masculine is not a people that they
Speaker 1: are gonna fight that they are fighting masculine. If you're
Speaker 1: a man, you like you too much of a man
Speaker 1: like dog, You're you're using the word hyper masculinity, Nika.
Speaker 1: That is like, how could you be a hyper man?
Speaker 1: Because our environments it's like a line. If a line,
Speaker 1: a line is not a hyper animal because it's in
Speaker 1: a jungle and they may have to fight every it's
Speaker 1: a fucking line. Now I can see if you and
Speaker 1: Beverly Hills fighting the fucking Starbucks lady, or the meter
Speaker 1: maid or you're going up there, you feel me, the
Speaker 1: motherfucking Bins dealer. That might be a hyper masculine man, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: but but a motherfucker can't make me feel hyper masculin
Speaker 1: to be a man to even do that, that's just
Speaker 1: you're just not civil. Yeah, I mean, but but when
Speaker 1: you talk. The only reason I use the word hyper
Speaker 1: masculinity is because when because bikers go out of that
Speaker 1: way too. I think hyper masculinity. I'm just saying from
Speaker 1: my experience, I think hyper masculinity come from just being
Speaker 1: raised wrong and doing extra ship. Like we we grew
Speaker 1: up in the game banging era. We grew up in
Speaker 1: a lot of different things where we say, you know,
Speaker 1: funk this, funk that when we go crazy. I wasn't
Speaker 1: even saying it in a bad way, and I'm glad
Speaker 1: you have to use that word. That's not what I'm saying. No,
Speaker 1: I'm saying we referenced the environment that way when the
Speaker 1: environment demands That's what I was kind of speaking to.
Speaker 1: But that's what society is now promote. It's making us
Speaker 1: feel that we gotta come up with those type of words.
Speaker 1: Hyper masculinity that is weird. You know, it's making us
Speaker 1: have to have to address it that way when the
Speaker 1: truth of the matter is, it's not that, you know,
Speaker 1: that's normal masculine ship. That's going on what he's referring to.
Speaker 1: But he gotta say that based on how the eight
Speaker 1: masculinity is not even accepted like that, Like you just said,
Speaker 1: when you do certain things, we're getting judged you you're
Speaker 1: doing that. Oh, you need to turn that damn. Like
Speaker 1: when people say, like I said, when people say, like
Speaker 1: we grew up not being able to cry, it's because
Speaker 1: where we're from, you have to be tough y. Ain't
Speaker 1: nothing wrong with us, something wrong with the motherfucking environment here,
Speaker 1: Ain't nothing wrong with me. No, if you put me
Speaker 1: around motherfucking lions, we're hunting. So again, like, do I think,
Speaker 1: like I said, when we say the words choving this right,
Speaker 1: I think we do have some prejudices mhm, stereotypes, stereotypes
Speaker 1: like you know how I feel about that one, But
Speaker 1: go ahead, you on point, because I think prejudice carries
Speaker 1: such a negative connotations. A lot of these words carry
Speaker 1: such negative connotations, and I don't believe that that's a reality.
Speaker 1: I don't think it's positive or negative. Like I'm a
Speaker 1: tyrant by nature, like a god made titant. I'm a tyrant.
Speaker 1: King is engineering the show. I am a tyrant. I
Speaker 1: press my will upon you cruelly without regards to how
Speaker 1: you feel. Now, my will could be for you to
Speaker 1: be successful. That's most likely what it is. And I
Speaker 1: don't care about how you feel about the chalices of
Speaker 1: being success. I don't care about how you feel about it.
Speaker 1: I don't care about where you think you're supposed to
Speaker 1: be it. I'm gonna press you. Oh gee, man, I can't. Yes,
Speaker 1: you fucking can? That sounds actually suckers ship my homeway alcatrash,
Speaker 1: we get into it. He don't talk to me for
Speaker 1: days because I will press his motherfucking line like you
Speaker 1: can do this, I can't do that. Yes you can.
Speaker 1: You sound like a sucker saying it. Why I gotta
Speaker 1: be a sucker because you're saying you can't do it
Speaker 1: without any regards. Cruel means without regards to emotions. I
Speaker 1: am cruel and ship when I want to be, I'm
Speaker 1: cruel as ship. I pressed my will. My will is
Speaker 1: for your benefits. So nobody had ever made me feel
Speaker 1: like being the tyrant I am is bad. I've had
Speaker 1: people get mad. There's people you either gonna head. You're
Speaker 1: either gonna win or you're gonna get the funk away
Speaker 1: from me. That's just how I roll. It's just how
Speaker 1: I'm born. I couldn't help it. I can't be nothing.
Speaker 1: I've tried to do other things that ship don't work
Speaker 1: for me. So I could relate. So when when so
Speaker 1: when we say toxic masculinity, I can relate. Man. I
Speaker 1: appreciate you relating, and I appreciate you tuning in man.
Speaker 1: You know because like you said, man, it's a lot
Speaker 1: of motherfucker's that you know they're gonna hate us. It's
Speaker 1: a lot of motherfucker's gonna love us. And at the
Speaker 1: end of the day, it's like you said, man, I
Speaker 1: don't give a funk about it either way, man, because
Speaker 1: we're gonna be who we are. Man. We're gonna represent
Speaker 1: this manhood to the best our ability. We're gonna give
Speaker 1: our perspectives, we're gonna we're gonna let my fucker's know
Speaker 1: what it is, and we're gonna always be three hunting.
Speaker 1: And that's the important part. From that educated place, and
Speaker 1: I wouldn't say this. I want to ask a question though,
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, I'm on your show, but I
Speaker 1: want to ask, like, is the our environment and the
Speaker 1: trauma and all of that, do you feel like that
Speaker 1: really fucks us up? And relate. I'm just talking about
Speaker 1: general relationships, just men, women, whatever it is, because I know,
Speaker 1: for me, I'm a nut, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I know I'm a nut and uh you know my
Speaker 1: Instagram handle and say hi to the bad guy and
Speaker 1: I put that on near because people don't understand why
Speaker 1: I did that. I deal with people, and I struggle
Speaker 1: with the fact that I'm in growth mode right but
Speaker 1: there's a lot of people that want to tell me
Speaker 1: who I am? You this you that you you act
Speaker 1: like this, you act like that, and and I'm constantly
Speaker 1: getting judged and you know, critiqued. So I just you know,
Speaker 1: I did what n w A did with niggas with attitude. Man.
Speaker 1: I'm like, man, I'm the bad guy, but I'm really
Speaker 1: not a bad guy. But I've been through a lot
Speaker 1: of ship. So it's our because because we are show
Speaker 1: is toxic masculinity and it's not even really the the
Speaker 1: fuck up portion of toxic masculinity. But I think it's
Speaker 1: kind of it's something there where Well I'll go past
Speaker 1: that then, but where we go? But I'm asking this man, like,
Speaker 1: you know, can we be blamed for this ship or
Speaker 1: or could we just ride it out and just know
Speaker 1: who we are? Because at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: I know me, I'm I'm fucked up, and I'm looking
Speaker 1: for people to know that they fucked up too. I
Speaker 1: had a commensation you don't want to be lonely. No,
Speaker 1: it ain't even that, It ain't even that. It's just
Speaker 1: I want everybody to recognize they sucked up so we
Speaker 1: can get along a little better. You don't want to
Speaker 1: be lonely and Bill, but but but but but um,
Speaker 1: I don't know if people really realize they sucked up.
Speaker 1: I think you've got to be a special person, like
Speaker 1: I know I'm sucked up, but you're probably not fucked up.
Speaker 1: If you realize you're fucked up. To be honest with you,
Speaker 1: I think you can get control of it. Explain that Pete.
Speaker 1: The capacity to be is like self reflective enough to
Speaker 1: acknowledge like your own reality versus the room and go
Speaker 1: you know, I think I'm fucked up, probably means you
Speaker 1: aren't quite as as fucked up as maybe you think anymore. Well,
Speaker 1: I don't think he was up. Also could be a
Speaker 1: little fa I never I mean when I say fucked up, though,
Speaker 1: I mean like you it took me. I'm I'm forty one.
Speaker 1: What's the worst thing you think you ever did as
Speaker 1: a man? Honestly? If you if you if your mind sharing,
Speaker 1: you're saying you up? What's that? I'm not even saying
Speaker 1: about the worship ever there, I'm just saying my mental compacion,
Speaker 1: But I'm saying, what's the action that you felt that
Speaker 1: you was? Like, Man, I'm a funked up nigga? Do
Speaker 1: you mean you're funked up? Like like you're a fucked
Speaker 1: up person or like I'm not saying I'm like a
Speaker 1: evil person. I'm saying that that's not what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So so I'll give I'll give you an example. I'll
Speaker 1: give you example why I realized I was fucked up.
Speaker 1: I saw I used to sell Sharon and it was
Speaker 1: a pregnant lady that was buying it. I'm gonna give
Speaker 1: you one of them, right, And I don't think something
Speaker 1: was wrong with my mind as much as I thought
Speaker 1: something was wrong with my edgy cation. Like I used
Speaker 1: to carry this mentality when I was hustling, when I
Speaker 1: was selling shoe, when I was selling rocks, when I
Speaker 1: was getting down that people are making a conscious choice
Speaker 1: to buy product. I used to pride myself and feel
Speaker 1: better than other d boys because I would never use
Speaker 1: a cheap cut. Certain homies will use break fluid. I
Speaker 1: would always use high dollar andy and drops and law either.
Speaker 1: I prided myself and carrying the rest product at all time,
Speaker 1: the highest level. Right, this is for real, I'm just
Speaker 1: being honest. People would buy it the Rolls Royce of
Speaker 1: pc B fucking for short. So but what I'm saying
Speaker 1: is when I realized I was fucked up is when
Speaker 1: I realized she couldn't control it. When I realized she
Speaker 1: wasn't making a conscious choice, it was like, Oh, these
Speaker 1: people don't really have control. And you and your sober ass,
Speaker 1: don't smoke, don't drink, you're making a conscious choice to
Speaker 1: contin in you and that day and that and from
Speaker 1: that day, and what really you fucked up right? And
Speaker 1: what really fucked me up right was when old girl
Speaker 1: came with her kids. He wasn't fucked up or nothing.
Speaker 1: But I was like, damn, why did I sell this lady?
Speaker 1: Sure this kid could have came out fucked up and
Speaker 1: I should have made a decision for her. M I
Speaker 1: mean my ship, but I gotta go. You really are
Speaker 1: a fuson because the cold. The cold thing about that
Speaker 1: is that they all you do is drink water. You
Speaker 1: don't even you don't do you don't do nothing of
Speaker 1: the ship. Other people do to get them through those moments.
Speaker 1: See those moments. Talked about that when I picked him
Speaker 1: up from prison. You know, I picked him up for prison.
Speaker 1: He was at the Big Hommy house. He just got
Speaker 1: out of prison, and we went to a Chinese food spot.
Speaker 1: We're eating this ship really cold, right and we're eating
Speaker 1: this ship and I was like, damn we He was like, man,
Speaker 1: I used to be hear you're rapping about the nigga
Speaker 1: and the shop we was doing. The guy used to
Speaker 1: be like nigga and my nigga represents there. I'm like, yeah, God,
Speaker 1: that ship was crazy and it was you. Niggas was crazy. Nicka,
Speaker 1: I remember Nigga. It was Tim Nicky was shared nigga.
Speaker 1: We was going to bust on them. Nigga nigga. You
Speaker 1: shot at the back of the car and Nigga. I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, ship and I remember the time we
Speaker 1: did this nigga nigga buss and ship and nigga had
Speaker 1: to just get on that nigga and I popped that nigga.
Speaker 1: He was like. I was like, nigga and yo, crazy nigga,
Speaker 1: you'll be smoking sermon ship for we. Guy used to
Speaker 1: be like, Nicka, how was you doing this ship smoking?
Speaker 1: He was like, I used to think to myself, how
Speaker 1: was you not smoking sermon to go do this ship? Exactly?
Speaker 1: I was like, sober, regular nigger, you so cold? You
Speaker 1: do this ship without no mind transformation. He was one
Speaker 1: step away from filing a W three for that job. Well,
Speaker 1: now I'm gonna say, though, glays it like I did
Speaker 1: similar ship. So when when like you know, like I
Speaker 1: know my nigga might be listening or whatever, but like
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like I was on some
Speaker 1: like trying to sell I never sew no water, but
Speaker 1: were setting crack and ship. And now used to feel
Speaker 1: bad about that ship and I felt like you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, we we did that ship for a
Speaker 1: limited time only you know what I'm saying like McDonald's.
Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, I just felt
Speaker 1: like all the things that I've ever done in my life,
Speaker 1: and I felt like, where did this ship come from?
Speaker 1: And it really comes from you talked, because because when
Speaker 1: you talk to me, it sounds like survival mode. It
Speaker 1: don't sound like I've been knowing you for a while now,
Speaker 1: you like one of the best niggers to me, I
Speaker 1: wouldn't even I wouldn't even if I if I knew you,
Speaker 1: and I didn't know the culture and I didn't know
Speaker 1: like where we come from. You couldn't even convinced me
Speaker 1: that you was hear that and nope, and and with
Speaker 1: me too. People don't know because because my my journey
Speaker 1: to this ship wasn't there. I'm not no liar, right,
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna tell you I wasn't even really. I
Speaker 1: went from scared too, I don't give a funk, you know,
Speaker 1: I went from nervous to I don't care about life.
Speaker 1: You feel me And I always registered in my mind
Speaker 1: who I love and who I don't give a funk about.
Speaker 1: And at this point when we have these conversations, just
Speaker 1: like man if I met you just regularly I wouldn't
Speaker 1: be like, Damn class, he don't drink, he don't do
Speaker 1: none of this ship. He don't do none of this
Speaker 1: ship that people do to sedate themselves and make themselves
Speaker 1: feel better. And I look at you, and you you're
Speaker 1: not a um and I don't want to let no
Speaker 1: niggers feel like you can run up on the homie
Speaker 1: because we're gonna suck you up. We're gonna suck you up.
Speaker 1: But you don't look like a threatening nigga, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. So to that point, what I'm saying
Speaker 1: is and I don't look like a threatened nigga to me.
Speaker 1: So at this point, it's like, Damn, we have these
Speaker 1: situations where we like grow up and we in survival mode. Bro.
Speaker 1: And why I posed that first question because I felt
Speaker 1: like I went and did a lot of ship that
Speaker 1: I did if I wasn't in that environment. Bro, that's
Speaker 1: never done nothing. But but that's really what it's about though,
Speaker 1: that's it ain't nothing wrong with us, because it's something
Speaker 1: wrong with the environment. The environment turns out this kind
Speaker 1: of person. If you're not this kind of person in
Speaker 1: the environment, you may not make it out alive. So
Speaker 1: I've never I've never thought badly the things I've never
Speaker 1: thought bad about suiting no nigga, Like because that nigga
Speaker 1: had it coming. I shot that nigga on purpose, and
Speaker 1: I like not negative. I don't because it comes like
Speaker 1: I hate that that concept is tough based on where
Speaker 1: we're from. Like, if you shoot the nigga, asks tough, No,
Speaker 1: it's not nigga. You probably had to shoot the nigga.
Speaker 1: Now I get it. If you just I don't think
Speaker 1: it's tough. If you shoot the nigga, you didn't have
Speaker 1: to shoot. If you just man, I used to press
Speaker 1: my homies, They'll tell you this. If you if I
Speaker 1: bring some of them niggas on, if you press the
Speaker 1: civilian around me, I was gonna probably fire your shut
Speaker 1: up mhmm. Don't do that to somebody. That civilian is
Speaker 1: somebody that's not with the activities, somebody that's not a
Speaker 1: gang member. So like it used to be people walking
Speaker 1: down the street in our hood because right it was
Speaker 1: like a program. When you get out of jail, you
Speaker 1: go to this program and they would walk down the
Speaker 1: hood to the Metro. If it was one of my
Speaker 1: homies who not used to having power and misusing their power,
Speaker 1: pressing it onto a civilian. I would immediately go and
Speaker 1: deal with him, don't. It's people that want that energy,
Speaker 1: so I don't. I don't think, like I said, I
Speaker 1: pride myself in and I don't think I'm a sucked
Speaker 1: up there at all. I mean, I think I'm my
Speaker 1: mind is sucked up based off of my issue with myself.
Speaker 1: Is I was telling keing this my issue. I was
Speaker 1: telling somebody else. I was saying, I always look at
Speaker 1: the end. That's my mistake. I look at the end.
Speaker 1: He was sucked up when you so dope the baby. No, No,
Speaker 1: I was miseducated. I didn't. I don't even feel I
Speaker 1: was sucked up then I was. I was uneducated. I
Speaker 1: was uneducated one feeling. No, it's not feelings. If I
Speaker 1: would have just said I feel no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I'm saying I would tell you if I felt like
Speaker 1: I wasn't sucked up to me no, That's why I
Speaker 1: said to me up. But again I was soberly. No, listen,
Speaker 1: I was miseducated because I don't do drugs, So I
Speaker 1: don't know that this control over people. You had never
Speaker 1: heard anything about chemical dependence or anything like that at all,
Speaker 1: because nobody in my family is on drugs, So you
Speaker 1: hadn't heard rumors in the cosmos about anything that had
Speaker 1: to do with drug abuse at all. Not really, I'm
Speaker 1: about to pull you right here on ere seven years old.
Speaker 1: So if you didn't study your product, nigga to understand
Speaker 1: what it was doing, the motherfucker's you was fucked up
Speaker 1: because you was sober naked, You were sober when you
Speaker 1: was doing this. You was doing that with drinking water,
Speaker 1: drinking tease, eating regular food. You just thought it's interesting.
Speaker 1: These people seem to really enjoy it. They just keep
Speaker 1: coming back, and you never decided hold Because now that
Speaker 1: now that I really know, you told me you were
Speaker 1: researcher niked, so you you didn't think that yourself to say, damn,
Speaker 1: why do they keep coming back for these mixtures of chemicals?
Speaker 1: I thought they enjoyed the flavor. So that's what made
Speaker 1: you sucked up to me, because you could have research
Speaker 1: that information. You could have you could ask sure, But
Speaker 1: but I'm just telling you what makes you funk up
Speaker 1: to me? I agree, it's just me, but so you're
Speaker 1: still my nigga. No, it's not that. No, No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: you're you're trying to I'm not trying to escape. I
Speaker 1: was ignorant. I didn't have an information. This this is
Speaker 1: the truth because when I when I realized what the
Speaker 1: information was, I changed also, well, didn't guess what I do, right,
Speaker 1: I'll be tracked. I just find it a little disappointing
Speaker 1: that that information was that difficult to find. Bro. When
Speaker 1: you listen, when you're in the storm of a hurricane,
Speaker 1: it's not like you know outside of it. I would
Speaker 1: imagine it be easier to see what was going on. No,
Speaker 1: it's actually not. When you're in the storm, When you're
Speaker 1: in the eye of a hurricane, nothing else is going
Speaker 1: on right there. You gotta just no, just listen, Just
Speaker 1: just imagine this. Imagine the whole world looks like this
Speaker 1: in the circle. How how would you identify a potent
Speaker 1: so customer from somebody who might not be interested in
Speaker 1: they would come and actually engage me in business. They
Speaker 1: didn't before they knew you had opened up, shot before
Speaker 1: they knew before they knew that coming to you men
Speaker 1: walking into a store, how would you sit back and
Speaker 1: identify there's a hundred people, there might be seven or
Speaker 1: eight customers in there. I wonder who they may be.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Sharm is different PCP like people. It's
Speaker 1: not like that type of drug. It's not that it's
Speaker 1: like crack crack. I could figure it out fast. I
Speaker 1: was like, oh the mother control. They said, this is
Speaker 1: fucked up. That's why I stopped selling crack. So PCP
Speaker 1: I felt like it was a different kind of drug
Speaker 1: because people are normal fucking with it. There are normal
Speaker 1: people fucking with it, or ideally what you would call normal,
Speaker 1: Like they don't they're not pushing baskets because PCPs ain't
Speaker 1: pushing baskets. They got cars, money strippers can be fine.
Speaker 1: Everything ain't nothing. You won't know, so you believe I'm
Speaker 1: normal with all that? Is there a degeneration. But here's
Speaker 1: a great point, right, I watched motherfucker's drink All the
Speaker 1: time I watched motherfucker's drank. I have a hard time
Speaker 1: struggling who's an alcoholic and who's not, because by definition,
Speaker 1: all these motherfucker's alcoholics, all these motherfucker's around it is
Speaker 1: alcoholics right by definition. But then like I have to
Speaker 1: be careful because I had to be like okay, damn
Speaker 1: or that, because if if you see alcoholic, what would
Speaker 1: you do? Well, if you're a bartender and someone's waisted,
Speaker 1: you have to stop serving them, especially if they're supposedly
Speaker 1: driving home. You couldn't buy searan stick from me if
Speaker 1: you were turned up. Okay, it was there a palpable
Speaker 1: degeneration among any of your clientele? No, not propable. No,
Speaker 1: not with PCP. Mhm, not with PCP. It's different, and
Speaker 1: cycling then is a whole different kind of monster. You
Speaker 1: won't fucking no, it's not like Crystal. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: not like math. It's not like rocks is different like
Speaker 1: I'm I know the reason I know the coldest niggas
Speaker 1: from families as they used just buy sharing from the
Speaker 1: coldest niggas from the mind used to buy sharing from me.
Speaker 1: These are some of the niggas with rolex change. Maybe
Speaker 1: they're jumping out of regals and colors is with dating's
Speaker 1: naked low riders, nigga regular niggas, feel me, They're cool.
Speaker 1: They ain't close, ain't no hole, ain't no basket, regular people.
Speaker 1: Then I realized they were medicating differently, you mean, for
Speaker 1: a reason, And then that's when I started like feel me.
Speaker 1: I was like hold up. Then I start kind of
Speaker 1: getting some information. Then even if I thought I can
Speaker 1: ignore the information, it was like God won't, God won't
Speaker 1: let me do it. Bro, they just start coming down
Speaker 1: like the building fault on my head. That's true. So
Speaker 1: different I'm trying. I'm trying to get I'm trying to
Speaker 1: channel some audience questions potentially through my brain and into
Speaker 1: the show. So you had mentioned that when you realize
Speaker 1: that this was potentially a conflict, that you would change
Speaker 1: what you were doing or to whom you were selling.
Speaker 1: If there wasn't a palpable degeneration, how would you make
Speaker 1: this assessment there? And to whom would you be selling
Speaker 1: that was a long term operable user? You don't know?
Speaker 1: So okay. So when so to identify because we're talking
Speaker 1: about identifying a customer. So when I first got into it,
Speaker 1: I didn't have to identify customers, right, I was working
Speaker 1: for somebody else. So I'm gonna tell your story where
Speaker 1: I was working for my big hop up right pluck
Speaker 1: would pay me. First off, I start off being a
Speaker 1: hoodie who man, I worked twelve hours a day for
Speaker 1: three hundred dollars a week. Hmm, okay, right, So my
Speaker 1: job was to sit outside on my car and if
Speaker 1: I see the police hit the corner, scream who do
Speaker 1: you that way? The customers didn't come from the back
Speaker 1: and nobody made a sale. Pay me three hundred dollars
Speaker 1: a week to do that, twelve hours a day, five
Speaker 1: days a week. Right. He would take me to buy clothes,
Speaker 1: make sure I look straight. I had all the dickies,
Speaker 1: everything s torus, all kinds of ship. That was my job.
Speaker 1: This is nineteen right, So when I get into the
Speaker 1: house now because at this point now my my older homies,
Speaker 1: Dad was like my generation. They were still in they
Speaker 1: were starting to not still and I don't want to
Speaker 1: say that, um they were skimming. They start skimming off
Speaker 1: the top, bringing their on PCP into his spot right
Speaker 1: and setting their own to make the profit it. So
Speaker 1: he said, man, I trust glasses. This is this little
Speaker 1: nig got kind of race them. So hey, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: put you in here. Y'all fired. Now that breads like
Speaker 1: an issue between me and them just right. So now
Speaker 1: they're like, oh, this is Nick Finn, you know. So
Speaker 1: I'm in the house now. So now I'm in the
Speaker 1: house every day, right, I don't have to look for
Speaker 1: a customer. All the customers were found, so that coming
Speaker 1: to the door, I'm looking at them through a screen,
Speaker 1: through a screen, right, I'm doing the deal. Here, go
Speaker 1: to Sharon Bamn. I really came to see what I'm
Speaker 1: talking to. Most of the time, they have to know
Speaker 1: me and I have to know them, right, damn. Then
Speaker 1: when it got to the curve, once the house got
Speaker 1: shut there, mind you, when I'm working in this body's
Speaker 1: paying me three hundred and fifty dollars a week. That
Speaker 1: went to five hundred dollars a week to sell cern
Speaker 1: I'm selling roughly six to seven thousand dollars a day
Speaker 1: in germ M. Every stick I'm may after three hundred dollars.
Speaker 1: Nicknamed water Boy. Right, every stick so it ounced right,
Speaker 1: A ounce of PCP. Right, you used to get thirty
Speaker 1: deep cigarettes out of it. I was really good. I
Speaker 1: could get thirty five to forty. So every dollar I
Speaker 1: made on top of that, I got to keep the
Speaker 1: money right, so that five hundred will look closer to
Speaker 1: two thousand by the end of the week. Then I
Speaker 1: went to the curve, I'm selling the same ship. Now
Speaker 1: I'm seeing everybody. Nobody looks like that. These ain't like
Speaker 1: bum Nick. It's not like that. He's regular motherfucking killers too,
Speaker 1: blow your fucking at off. So it had to be
Speaker 1: a level of respect. It's beautiful strippers, it's nurses, it's
Speaker 1: a different type of products. So as I'm doing my
Speaker 1: thing with it, right, by the time I got to
Speaker 1: my own house, which was in Mona Park on A
Speaker 1: hundred eighteen, right while I was running it and my show,
Speaker 1: I knew all the customers, so I never had to
Speaker 1: go find any another question. Like I knew some girls.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say, how what the hell is that
Speaker 1: supposed to mean? You, motherfucker? So they have some of
Speaker 1: your older brothers and whatnot, and you know, your various
Speaker 1: family members depending on which one you asked. Shout out
Speaker 1: to my shout out to my log Bob right, because
Speaker 1: Bob oh my life, like yep, and I was one
Speaker 1: of them. And if you Bob, Bob gott a fucking
Speaker 1: billy for me, you you won't know. Motherfucker's sharon. Ain't
Speaker 1: that kind of drug? Yeah? But like and you were
Speaker 1: talking about, you know, selective chemical usage and whatnot. Because
Speaker 1: I did know a handful of people who had relatives
Speaker 1: who had been former users of that who were like
Speaker 1: I won't say retarded, but they were like they weren't good,
Speaker 1: Like they weren't who they used to be. So is
Speaker 1: that the result of getting now I say stepped on
Speaker 1: because it's water, but like you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: with bad chemicals, that then does that And that's what
Speaker 1: that's what you got mixed up with a bad supplier.
Speaker 1: So unless they're liars, which they couldn't know. So you
Speaker 1: never know how chemicals gonna affect bodies, right, It's like
Speaker 1: it's like your job, right, you could give somebody medicine
Speaker 1: for me and you don't know how it's gonna refect,
Speaker 1: like it could affect a body. Don't get me wrong.
Speaker 1: If if you custom sharn with some break fluid, the
Speaker 1: motherfucker throw the swoll up. Yeah, I mean, if you
Speaker 1: use a cheap cut and and it's things that you
Speaker 1: could do wrong. But when people have those misfires, is
Speaker 1: most likely just a bad chemical reaction. It's not It
Speaker 1: don't even have to be somebody did something wrong. It
Speaker 1: literally the body just didn't accept it reacted fucked up.
Speaker 1: So it's not again, it's complicated. Sarmons Like some ship
Speaker 1: it ain't you sidnized trying something like real ship? Isn't
Speaker 1: that ship prepared? And some ship? So you gotta know
Speaker 1: what you're doing with it. You feel me it's it's serious,
Speaker 1: so but I'm not playing. I'm they're serious, but you
Speaker 1: don't know who's who. So it was always this elevated
Speaker 1: feeling of a hustler because I felt like I was
Speaker 1: dealing with other men like me. Like I said, one
Speaker 1: of my mmies is all my life. For me, this
Speaker 1: nigga get to money like we get to money. Didn't
Speaker 1: matter that he's smoked. No motherfucker's niggas having money. He
Speaker 1: wasn't no raggedy nigga right to this day, this nigga
Speaker 1: getting some money. So you always felt like they can
Speaker 1: choose differently until you started me like, oh, this ship
Speaker 1: might be a little bit more powerful. Then I'm giving
Speaker 1: it credit for it. So as it safe to say that,
Speaker 1: it's kind of like, would it be equivalent to me saying,
Speaker 1: ain't my nigga, you gotta bottle hook up? Oh for
Speaker 1: for alcohol? Yeah? Would that would that be like? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Because because you would be like, ship, my nigga move,
Speaker 1: he drank, ship, I'm getting my bottle. Yeah. But see
Speaker 1: that's where it gets tricky at right, Like who is
Speaker 1: actually alcoholic? But I'm just saying like from selling shirm.
Speaker 1: So if I asked and say, hey man, let me
Speaker 1: get a stick, is that would that be equivalent to you?
Speaker 1: Like ship, that's equivalent to you saying that nigga grab
Speaker 1: me a bottle from the liquor store. That at that time,
Speaker 1: that's how I thought, Okay, it's functional alcoholics. It's functional alcohol.
Speaker 1: I don't even think there's a real People always ask
Speaker 1: me because why I don't drink, bro, I grew up
Speaker 1: with real winos, Like the alcohol is strong with nicks,
Speaker 1: be laid out in front of the store, fuck up,
Speaker 1: laid out you feel me? That was real alcohol. This ship,
Speaker 1: y'all dragon now is not real. They didn't cut this
Speaker 1: ship down. Nigga's got to drink a hundred bottles to
Speaker 1: get there. Feel me, That ship ain't real? Are you talking?
Speaker 1: Are you saying that? Back when you were younger, they
Speaker 1: didn't have certified organic mixers