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Speaker 1: Nicky Glazery. Here's Nicky. Hello here, I am welcome to

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Speaker 1: the Nicky Glazer Podcast. It's Wednesday, December one. Rabbit rabbit

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Speaker 1: Do you ever do that? You say rabbit rabbit at

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Speaker 1: the top of the month. Never have remembered in my

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Speaker 1: life to do it? What do you? What are you

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Speaker 1: wearing on your shirt? Zero fox? Given? Is that what

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Speaker 1: it says? Yes? Oh? I like it? Um, that was

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Speaker 1: like I guess the thing to say of like two thousand.

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Speaker 1: That's a little but like I like, I, Uh, listen,

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Speaker 1: we gotta get fox otherwise we're not going to get

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Speaker 1: much done. But it does. If I saw you walking

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Speaker 1: around with that, I'd be like, WHOA, she's intimidating, Like

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Speaker 1: she doesn't keep a fuck And but little do I

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Speaker 1: you know for people the voice of an angel, and

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Speaker 1: you desperately care what people think. No, you actually, I

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Speaker 1: don't think you do. You're not someone that strikes me

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Speaker 1: as that insecure. Um, although we all are in our

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Speaker 1: own way. Um, you're just uh. I wasn't an enigma

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Speaker 1: you are. You're not someone to who is insecure. You're

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Speaker 1: someone who is your unlike a lot of your unlike

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Speaker 1: anyone I know. Maybe not anyone I know, but you're

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Speaker 1: um you you have a type of anxiety I would

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Speaker 1: never know about in terms of like, uh, I don't

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Speaker 1: even know how to describe your anxiety. An Anxiety can

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Speaker 1: be such a spectrum, like you get nervous not of

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Speaker 1: what people think about you and like your likes and interests,

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Speaker 1: like I'm I'm always worried about what it means about me. Fundamentally,

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Speaker 1: you get anxiety. And by the way, let me just

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Speaker 1: cut in and you can tell me what you get

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Speaker 1: anxiety about about. But my guess is that your anxiety

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Speaker 1: or insecurities are about just like nerves of being the

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Speaker 1: center of attention or like, yes, I don't just being

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Speaker 1: doing something embarrassing, not not even embarrassing. I just don't

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Speaker 1: like the attention being focused on me. I don't what's

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Speaker 1: going to happen? Like what's the fear? Uh? You know,

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Speaker 1: I'm really trying to figure that out. I think I

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Speaker 1: maybe like the burden of having to entertain because I

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Speaker 1: do have social anxiety, and that's more about like how

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Speaker 1: do I end a conversation without being rude? How do

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Speaker 1: I get out of a situation? Well, these are all

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Speaker 1: things about, you know, without being rude. That's like, so

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Speaker 1: people don't think I'm a bad person, So it is

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Speaker 1: it is in security is about a judgment of like

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Speaker 1: who you are. But then there are times where I

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Speaker 1: see you like, oh, just tell him, no, I'm not

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Speaker 1: doing like You'll like sometimes you don't like someone, which

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Speaker 1: has happened in the past, and you've been kind of

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Speaker 1: perfectly spot on with the people that you are, just like, no,

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Speaker 1: they're not good, and you've had this, like you know,

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Speaker 1: back when we used to do you up and I

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Speaker 1: would see you in studio with people, there would just

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Speaker 1: be a vibe sometimes when you're like, I'm angry and

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Speaker 1: I don't like them around and you are. So when

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Speaker 1: I get that anger, I can't I actually go the

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Speaker 1: other way, which is such an annoying trait of like

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Speaker 1: I'm so scared that people will see it and that

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Speaker 1: it will change the way they behave around me in order.

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Speaker 1: So I think that when I fear people or I

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Speaker 1: hate people, I'm scared that if they know how much

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Speaker 1: I hate them, they will either they'll I don't know

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Speaker 1: what the fear is that they know, because if I

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Speaker 1: hate them, why do I care if they know I

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Speaker 1: hate them? I guess it's this fear that they'll I

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Speaker 1: guess I'm usually scared of people I hate because they're

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Speaker 1: usually people that are very scary, like I. I don't

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Speaker 1: like people that are manipulative, are in positions of power,

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Speaker 1: are you know, exploit their power. So I guess when

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Speaker 1: I fear that they know I hate them, because I

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Speaker 1: know that they're sociopathic enough to use it against me

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Speaker 1: if they know that I am not on their good side.

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Speaker 1: So I think that's why I maybe that's it. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what trying to psychote. Maybe because it's like

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Speaker 1: you can't believe that someone would do that because to you,

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Speaker 1: like in your values, you're a good person. You would

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Speaker 1: never harm someone. But the fact that someone can go

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Speaker 1: out of their way just know they can hurt It's

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Speaker 1: about me though, It's about protecting me. I don't want

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Speaker 1: if I hate someone, they're usually someone who is in

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Speaker 1: a position of power and they're a bad, bad person,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean. And if they know I

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Speaker 1: hate them, they will direct that sociopathy and that craziness

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Speaker 1: at me, and I don't want to set that off

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Speaker 1: because the people I I loathe the most, and by

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Speaker 1: the way, it's all based like I shouldn't loathe, I don't.

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Speaker 1: I try not to loathe anyone, and I truly try

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Speaker 1: to like even someone like Trump, like I try to

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Speaker 1: empathize or even someone like I just understand, like his

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Speaker 1: brain is just a bad brain, and he grew up

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Speaker 1: with bad parents and a bad system, and like, and

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Speaker 1: he's just And I know some people are like a

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Speaker 1: lot of people grow up with in that same wealth

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Speaker 1: and that same kind of family system, and they don't

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Speaker 1: turn into Trump. Well they don't have his brain too, so,

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Speaker 1: which is a fucked up brain and the same kind

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Speaker 1: of trauma that happened to him that led him to

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Speaker 1: be the person he is and the people that like him. God,

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Speaker 1: I couldn't understand people less and as I as the

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Speaker 1: fear of him winning again and not conceding, which you

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Speaker 1: know he won't even so the fear of him taking

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Speaker 1: office no matter what, because it's it's not even who

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Speaker 1: cares if he wins or not. We know that he

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Speaker 1: will just take it even if he loses, really has

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Speaker 1: been scaring me recently. And um it's been drudging up

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Speaker 1: this like anger towards his supporters that I had I

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Speaker 1: haven't felt since November of last year. You know that

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Speaker 1: kind of went away, Not that I mean it bubbled

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Speaker 1: up again in January, but um, it's just I haven't

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Speaker 1: felt it, and I just don't like it. I don't

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Speaker 1: want to. I don't want to hate people that that

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Speaker 1: I don't understand or that you know. I've thought about recently.

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Speaker 1: Is like I aspire to be a fully conscious person,

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Speaker 1: and in order to be a fully conscious person, you

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Speaker 1: have to take your point of view, but you also

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Speaker 1: have a lot of coffee. You have to have a

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Speaker 1: lot of coffee. Just make sure, like just being unconscious

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Speaker 1: is like sleeping or getting knocked at, not that kind

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Speaker 1: of box. Or like I want my soul to be conscious,

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Speaker 1: like I want to be so like fully understanding of everyone,

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Speaker 1: And you have to take in all sorts of perspectives

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Speaker 1: and realize that there are perspectives that you don't know,

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Speaker 1: that you don't even know that you don't know. Well, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's the whole free will. Like when I talk about Trump,

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Speaker 1: like how could if my parents heard me empathizing with

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Speaker 1: Trump and being like I can see why he's the

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Speaker 1: way he is and I forgive him for it, they

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Speaker 1: would go they would baffle them that I could have

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Speaker 1: any kind of sympathy for that person, or Jeffrey Epstein

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Speaker 1: or je Laine Maxwell or like any of these fucking

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Speaker 1: abusers that I've heard about. But even um, you know

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Speaker 1: you've everyone's heard me talk about it at nausea, and

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Speaker 1: of like, I I feel bad for people who have

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Speaker 1: done Like there was this I was listening to my

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Speaker 1: friends radio show the other day and there was this

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Speaker 1: girl on and she was talking about a show she

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Speaker 1: had thought of that was so hilarious. She's, um, I'll

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Speaker 1: plug her show. She's a a St. Louis talent. Her

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Speaker 1: name is Lauren wait something. She was on The Courtney Show.

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Speaker 1: Uh yeah, Risley Lauren Riseley and she's on this new

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Speaker 1: um uh HDTV show called like Asked the Closer or

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Speaker 1: something like that. But apparently it's a great show. I

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Speaker 1: want to support other And she was really funny on

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Speaker 1: on my favorite you know, morning radio show, the Courtney

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Speaker 1: Show and St. Louis. I was listening to it and

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Speaker 1: she was on and she was talking about a show

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Speaker 1: she pitched or like you know, jokingly was pitching where

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Speaker 1: it was like combined people's love of dogs and murder.

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Speaker 1: And you find people that abuse dogs, you save the dog,

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Speaker 1: and then you murder the person that did it, and

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Speaker 1: which is funny. But I also I'm like, if someone's

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Speaker 1: beating a dog, they have been very abused, and I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: well let's drink that person down to a child and

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Speaker 1: think about what happened to them that made them do that.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I've just even even like even like, oh,

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Speaker 1: they need to be punished, made me go no, let's

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Speaker 1: have Sometimes it's fun to be angry. Can I just

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Speaker 1: say though, that your fear that you were trying to

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Speaker 1: you were like, oh, I've been thinking about it more

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Speaker 1: like my fear of having all the focus on me.

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Speaker 1: Maybe weren't thinking about it till like actually brought it up.

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Speaker 1: But I can't even plan a wedding because I don't

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Speaker 1: want to be the center of attention. To be honest, Okay,

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Speaker 1: well here's maybe this will help you and maybe whoever

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Speaker 1: is listening, and you're like, weird, not weird fear, but

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Speaker 1: you're valid fear of being the center of attention. Being

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Speaker 1: um mine is being of seen as a joke or

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Speaker 1: a fraud, you know, like I have impostor syndrome. Except

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Speaker 1: for the podcast, I just want to say that for

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Speaker 1: my stand up, I have impostor said drome where I

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Speaker 1: think that I'm tricking everyone. I'm good, but I'm not

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Speaker 1: as good as people think, and that I've figured out

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Speaker 1: little shortcuts, and that I'm like a magician. And and

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Speaker 1: you know, my therapist, my bad therapist, abusive therapist always

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Speaker 1: used to say, and this helps me with imposter syndrome.

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Speaker 1: I know. I love how much I referenced her as

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Speaker 1: much as she was a bad therapist, like she's the

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Speaker 1: only one I reference. It's like when I transferred from

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Speaker 1: the University of Colorado Boulder and I went to Kansas.

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Speaker 1: Everything I learned in college that was like Wow, that

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Speaker 1: class really changed me. Was all my freshman year and

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Speaker 1: I left. I keep thinking that her name is Maya

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Speaker 1: abusive therapist. Oh my god, let's call her doctor abusive,

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Speaker 1: my so doctor abuse if because honestly, this woman is

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Speaker 1: if she's still out there, is capable of suing my

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Speaker 1: ass um dr abuse. If I'm not even joking you,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to call her that in my book, Maya

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Speaker 1: abusive uh dr use of uh. And you guys can

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Speaker 1: use this in your lives too. If you've ever had

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Speaker 1: an abusive boyfriend. You can call him, uh, you know

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Speaker 1: Mr abuse Ive, um so doctor abusef used to say

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Speaker 1: to me, who do you think you are? That you've

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Speaker 1: tricked all these people? You've tricked executives that you know

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Speaker 1: in MTV Comedy Central, the comedy seller you tricked st

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Speaker 1: into getting you pass. You think you're so good at

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Speaker 1: tricking people, And then it flipped it on its head

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Speaker 1: because I think I'm so shitty, right, My whole thing

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Speaker 1: is like I'm shitty and no one knows I'm shitty.

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Speaker 1: But really, the idea that I think that all these

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Speaker 1: people were duped by me is really me thinking I'm

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Speaker 1: pretty fucking great, which then turns your argument on its

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Speaker 1: head of like you're actually what you're actually saying when

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Speaker 1: you think you're shittier than everyone thinks and you're you know,

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Speaker 1: an impostor, is that you're so cunning. You're like, you know,

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Speaker 1: Leonardo DiCaprio and catch me if you can. No, and

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Speaker 1: not these people are smart. These people a lot. You know,

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Speaker 1: some executives are dumb as ship and they're just assistants

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Speaker 1: that just stuck around long enough to be promoted through

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Speaker 1: the system. And they don't deserve to be where they are.

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Speaker 1: But a lot of people that approve what goes on

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Speaker 1: TV are very smart and are smarter than me at

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Speaker 1: picking stuff, and so I got it, and my fans,

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Speaker 1: I never feel this way about pasties, by the way,

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Speaker 1: and I and people that come see me do stand up.

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Speaker 1: I It's not like I hate even saying this because

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Speaker 1: it sounds like I'm I think that they're wrong or

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Speaker 1: something like, I don't get this feeling unless it's like

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Speaker 1: me posting a clip. But truly, my besties, this is

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Speaker 1: the thing I'm like confident I'm pretty damn good at

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Speaker 1: and even when I'm bad at it, it's good because

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Speaker 1: it's that's why I'm good. That's the beauty of this

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Speaker 1: podcast four days a week and being completely open is

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Speaker 1: that when it's bad, when I'm not a good host,

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Speaker 1: when I'm in a bad mood, when I'm sullen and

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Speaker 1: grumpy and being a bitch to Andrew and being like negative,

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Speaker 1: that's good because it's multifaceted, and it it's what I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to bring to this platform or you know, this

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Speaker 1: fucking it's it's not even what I'm trying to bring.

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Speaker 1: It's the only thing I can bring and I feel

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Speaker 1: good about that and even on my bad days and

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Speaker 1: so I can accept that, um and then learn from it.

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Speaker 1: I'm grateful that I've become such a better friend to

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Speaker 1: Andrew through being such a count to him on the

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Speaker 1: show and having people show me that and like tell me, like, hey,

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Speaker 1: you should pay attention. But anyway, so, Noah, I talked

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Speaker 1: about it the other day about my fear of posting clips.

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Speaker 1: I talked about it a little bit right on Monday,

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Speaker 1: and I saw that and then I posted a clip.

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Speaker 1: I was very proud of you. So we're many people

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Speaker 1: in my life. Thank you so much to those who

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Speaker 1: reached out to me about posting a clip, because you know,

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Speaker 1: I struggled with it. What I realized, Noah, and what

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Speaker 1: you can realize about this wedding, okay, is that and

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Speaker 1: this might help people because I just imagined I addressed

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Speaker 1: the fear. Okay, Nikki has a fear of posting something

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Speaker 1: online people seeing that she's not good. And by people,

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Speaker 1: I mean like other comedians who are experts at this

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Speaker 1: being able just then they get to look at it

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Speaker 1: closely and dissect how bad it is. Because if there's

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Speaker 1: a clip, you can dissect. You know, if if it's

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Speaker 1: a picture of me, that's a YouTube link in my

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Speaker 1: bio that takes some a couple of seconds, like you know,

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Speaker 1: clicks to dissect. If I give it to them like

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Speaker 1: here you go judge me, it's that's that's my fear. Okay,

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Speaker 1: my fear is one or two comedians who literally are

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Speaker 1: faceless to me. I don't even know who I'm picturing.

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Speaker 1: Usually can picture someone judging me on Instagram. This whole

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Speaker 1: sphere of the stand up clip. I don't even know

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Speaker 1: who the funk is judging me, but they're watching the

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Speaker 1: clip and they're analyzing it and they're going, she sucks. Wow.

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Speaker 1: I thought she was good because she's presented. You know,

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Speaker 1: she sells out on the road. She has pictures of

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Speaker 1: herself looking like she's killing on stage. This is really

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Speaker 1: I've never even paid attention. This isn't good. And you

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Speaker 1: know what, First of all, that fear is based in

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Speaker 1: my judgment of other people that I have of comics.

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Speaker 1: Because I don't watch a lot of stand up, I

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Speaker 1: just assume what people tell me. Oh you're good, so

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Speaker 1: I guess you're good. This one person I respect probiically,

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Speaker 1: I think you're good, you must be good, like something

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Speaker 1: like I just kind of see who you know, touch you,

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Speaker 1: and I go, okay, well they're probably good. I you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't really watch stand up and then I'll watch

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Speaker 1: it and I'll go, well, this is empty and unworked

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Speaker 1: out in garbage. The reason I do that is because

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Speaker 1: I feel like I am it's me projecting. I don't

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Speaker 1: even that person is probably pretty damn good. So then

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Speaker 1: I realized that once I named the fear really was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's the fear as people are gonna a couple of

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Speaker 1: people are going to judge me. And within the comedy community,

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Speaker 1: the biggest fear would be that it there they spread

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Speaker 1: it around that I'm not good, because, let me be honest,

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Speaker 1: a lot of comedians talk shit, and there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of comedians who we would all as a group

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Speaker 1: of comedians, not publicly, but have privately, in the backs

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Speaker 1: of rooms and green rooms, decided our ship comics who

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Speaker 1: are extremely successful, but we all know they're bad. We

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Speaker 1: all know the public is being deceived. We don't understand

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Speaker 1: why these people like like have their fans. And I

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Speaker 1: bet you anything of comedians would agree that this person

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Speaker 1: or these people suck. There's a there's a list. Not

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Speaker 1: gonna give it. You can only assume um. And those

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Speaker 1: comedians may or may not know that every comedian of

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Speaker 1: comedians think they suck UM, but we all do. And

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Speaker 1: I'm so scared of being on that list. Then I

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Speaker 1: was like, Okay, let me say. Let's say I make

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Speaker 1: the list because I post this clip. Um. Those comedians

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Speaker 1: that are on that list, I they only grow in popularity.

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Speaker 1: No opinion of a comedian has ever stopped them from

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Speaker 1: getting something. In fact, I've seen many of these comedians

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Speaker 1: that we've all agreed suck and you know, have deceived

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Speaker 1: are bad for comedy. I've seen them reach types of

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Speaker 1: fame that um get to the point where all the

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Speaker 1: comedians that talk about them start liking them and becoming

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Speaker 1: friends with them and associating with them. So even if

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Speaker 1: my worst fears that I'm black did somehow, which it's

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Speaker 1: just not, it's just not gonna happen. I've never seen

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Speaker 1: it happen. And even if it does happen, Like, even

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Speaker 1: if my fear is real, I was just like, fear

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Speaker 1: is like it's it's it's invisible. I don't know why

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Speaker 1: I pictured it I pictured fear like this like beach

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Speaker 1: ball of like uh air that was like this negative air,

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Speaker 1: and I was just holding the speech ball before I

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Speaker 1: posted that, and I was just like, once you acknowledge

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Speaker 1: what the fear is, it's like, okay, what really is it?

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Speaker 1: It's nothing, it does, It's invisible, it doesn't exist. It's

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Speaker 1: not like I'm gonna be in pain if I post this.

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Speaker 1: Just disabled the comments because my fear was Andrews like,

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Speaker 1: don't look at the comments. Well, I know you'll look

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Speaker 1: at the comments, and I know other comics will look

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Speaker 1: at the comments. And people like comments because people like

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Speaker 1: being told how to feel about something, and that's the

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Speaker 1: danger of comments. I do it every time I'm on

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Speaker 1: a Reddit threat and there's a video posted. I don't

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Speaker 1: even watch the video. I just go to the reddit

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Speaker 1: thing because I don't have the pays for it, and

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Speaker 1: I go, how am I supposed to feel about this?

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Speaker 1: What are people's opinions so I can pick one that

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Speaker 1: aligns with my beliefs and go with it. I'm a

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Speaker 1: fucking lemming too, so that's why I disabled comments on it.

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Speaker 1: I don't want people to I want people to form

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Speaker 1: their own opinions. On it without any assistance, which I didn't.

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Speaker 1: Even when I did that, I go, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: I didn't realize comments were just a suggestion of how

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Speaker 1: to feel about something, so you don't have to form

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Speaker 1: your own opinion and be an individual. And so for you,

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Speaker 1: I would try to picture the fear of the wedding

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Speaker 1: day and all that attention on you and what it

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Speaker 1: actually means, because what it means is is that you

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Speaker 1: think that people don't really want to focus on you,

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Speaker 1: that you're somehow like bothering us by doing that, or

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Speaker 1: like it's like that you're putting us out by being

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Speaker 1: the center of attention, and you're making us think, God,

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Speaker 1: Noah wants attention. I guess we got to give this

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Speaker 1: to her. She's so needy, or like the stays all

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Speaker 1: about her. Well, the truth is, people don't have to

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Speaker 1: go to your wedding. If people just and and yes,

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Speaker 1: a lot of people go, oh, we have to go

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Speaker 1: to a wedding. It's Snowa's wedding. She's my fucking friend

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Speaker 1: from for eight years or whatever it is. That sounds

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Speaker 1: like I'm saying what I say, and I would never

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Speaker 1: be mad at someone. But the thing is it's up

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Speaker 1: to them. It really, even in wedding invitation that seems

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Speaker 1: like a non negotiable Yes, I have to go, it's

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Speaker 1: their choice to go. And by the way, how great

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Speaker 1: do you feel when you see someone you love get

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Speaker 1: married and walked down the aisle? And have you ever

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Speaker 1: in your life been filled with and even you know,

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Speaker 1: maybe you do feel that when you're like, because I

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Speaker 1: do feel that way about other comics. My fear is

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Speaker 1: actually something I feel about other people. So maybe, but

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Speaker 1: I think for you you could even go as far

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Speaker 1: as to run it through your head and be like,

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Speaker 1: I've really never felt that way about someone. And the

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Speaker 1: people I have felt that about, and I'm speaking as you,

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Speaker 1: and I'm also speaking as me. The people I felt

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Speaker 1: that way about comedically that I go, oh god, they suck.

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Speaker 1: And the people that you've maybe felt like, oh my god,

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Speaker 1: she's such a bride, Silla, she's making this all about her.

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Speaker 1: She loves attention. No one would ever put you in

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Speaker 1: the same category as that person. It never know other

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Speaker 1: things about you or me line up with those comedians

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Speaker 1: and those brides. So this fear, it's it's just a thing.

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Speaker 1: You have to take. This beach ball and just like

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Speaker 1: throw it and go, okay, good, I know what it is.

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Speaker 1: It's not an actual physical like barrier. There's not like

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Speaker 1: a door you have to break down to have a wedding,

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Speaker 1: you know, like fears people have, like real fears of

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Speaker 1: like I could drown. I don't know how to swim,

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Speaker 1: I don't you know, I might get hit by a car.

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Speaker 1: I've been by a car before, like things that can

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Speaker 1: actually kill them. Having wedding is not going to kill you.

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Speaker 1: Posting on Instagram is not going to kill me. Um.

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Speaker 1: And I did it. I'm gonna do it again. And

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Speaker 1: as soon as I did it, I was like, this

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Speaker 1: was easy as fuck. It was the same way it

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Speaker 1: felt about going on first dates, which I used to

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Speaker 1: fear so much, And as soon as I would go

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Speaker 1: on one, I'd be like, where's the next one? Let's

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Speaker 1: do this, because I would be on this like roll.

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Speaker 1: It's the same way I feel about writing, you know,

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Speaker 1: like I'm trying to write a book right now with

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Speaker 1: this woman who's helping me, and um, I have this

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Speaker 1: immense fear over writing a book because it's not gonna

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Speaker 1: be good. I'm not gonna be as good as I

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Speaker 1: want to be but a second I wrote a chapter.

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Speaker 1: I was like, where's more? But then I took a

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Speaker 1: two month break and now I just had a call

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Speaker 1: with her and she's like, we're gonna get started again.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm having that fear again, and I'm

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Speaker 1: going to beach ball it and I'm gonna cricket. And

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00:20:28,160 --> 00:20:30,399
Speaker 1: it just hit the light and came back to me.

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Speaker 1: So I'm going to deal with it later. But let's

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Speaker 1: get Andrew in here and talk about some big news

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00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 1: he has. Andrew. Um, so we're talking about fear, and

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Speaker 1: like me posting, I know, well, you always wear those

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Speaker 1: shirts that say you have none. I just want to

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Speaker 1: double check that it's true. Um, we're talking about fear,

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00:20:53,359 --> 00:20:57,000
Speaker 1: and like, how like me posting the other day, I just,

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Speaker 1: for some reason, after talking about it enough, which by

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Speaker 1: the way, that helps, like journaling about the thing you're

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Speaker 1: fearful of talking about it with friends. Like if you're

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Speaker 1: just having it in your head, if you're listening to

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00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:09,439
Speaker 1: this podcast and all you do is talk about, like

413
00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:11,800
Speaker 1: think about your problems in your head, you gotta get

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Speaker 1: them out of your head. They don't do they start.

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00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:17,399
Speaker 1: You think it's enough because I used to think it

416
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,760
Speaker 1: was enough to to just think on something, put it

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Speaker 1: on a paper, or talk to a friend. Fucking leave

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Speaker 1: me a voice memo. I'm not even getting you. I

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Speaker 1: won't I won't even listen to it. But leave me

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Speaker 1: a voice memo on my d M s. And maybe

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Speaker 1: a girl once did that and I did listen to it.

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Speaker 1: She got me at a good time and I actually

423
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:35,880
Speaker 1: got to meet her at one of our shows. But honestly,

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00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,800
Speaker 1: say it out loud, write a voice memo to yourself,

425
00:21:38,840 --> 00:21:40,879
Speaker 1: and then erase it afterwards. You gotta say it out.

426
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:43,600
Speaker 1: Talk to a tree, talk to your dog. Um. Noah

427
00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:46,760
Speaker 1: just got over a fear of going back to jiu jitsu.

428
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:49,360
Speaker 1: She just told me, So, how long did you take

429
00:21:49,359 --> 00:21:52,360
Speaker 1: off from jiu jitsu a while? No? Uh, well, yeah,

430
00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:55,000
Speaker 1: I've been struggling with that. I did restart and then

431
00:21:55,040 --> 00:21:58,000
Speaker 1: I took off for like Thanksgiving, and the week before

432
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:00,600
Speaker 1: I didn't really go to class. It was like two

433
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:03,400
Speaker 1: weeks after, like I ate a bunch and was very

434
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:06,760
Speaker 1: like seditary, and I had this like big monster in

435
00:22:06,800 --> 00:22:09,280
Speaker 1: my head like, oh, you know you're not gonna remember,

436
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,320
Speaker 1: You're gonna be winded, You're not going to be able

437
00:22:11,359 --> 00:22:13,159
Speaker 1: to do an hour and a half, and then I

438
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:15,199
Speaker 1: was telling a girl in the locker room. I was like,

439
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:18,399
Speaker 1: I had this whole big conversation in my head before class,

440
00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:20,879
Speaker 1: trying to get me not to come here, But I

441
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 1: feel so good right now I had I was able

442
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:26,320
Speaker 1: to help someone. I was like, I got some good

443
00:22:26,359 --> 00:22:29,399
Speaker 1: tips and I just felt so fulfilled at the end

444
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:30,639
Speaker 1: of class, and I was like, why do you have

445
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:34,040
Speaker 1: to have these monsters in our head? Dude? We gotta Okay,

446
00:22:34,080 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 1: everyone who was listening right now, we all have something

447
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:39,200
Speaker 1: right now. We are so fucking dreading tackling, whether it's

448
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:42,639
Speaker 1: cleaning your room, cleaning a garage, taking your dog to

449
00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:44,960
Speaker 1: the I'm just listening things that I have to do,

450
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:48,679
Speaker 1: making an appointment for the guynacologist, going to talk to

451
00:22:48,720 --> 00:22:52,320
Speaker 1: a therapist. Like, right, don't do anything about it today.

452
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:53,920
Speaker 1: You want to clean your room, you don't to fucking

453
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:58,320
Speaker 1: call your that you've been avoiding calling. Just righte about it,

454
00:22:58,520 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 1: or talk to someone about it and talk about the

455
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:03,239
Speaker 1: fear behind it, because it's not like, oh, I just

456
00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:05,280
Speaker 1: don't have time to do it. You have. If you

457
00:23:05,280 --> 00:23:07,280
Speaker 1: have time to ship, you have time to do any

458
00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:10,679
Speaker 1: step towards these things. And I've noticed too, like with

459
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:13,440
Speaker 1: jiu jitsu, for instance, like that's a tough workout, like

460
00:23:13,840 --> 00:23:16,240
Speaker 1: that's why it might be a little bit more if

461
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:19,119
Speaker 1: it's a if it's a harder thing to tackle, the

462
00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:21,880
Speaker 1: fear will probably build up. And what kind of sucks

463
00:23:21,920 --> 00:23:23,520
Speaker 1: is if you're gonna take a class, maybe you just

464
00:23:23,560 --> 00:23:26,600
Speaker 1: want to start with rolling around for ten minutes and

465
00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:28,399
Speaker 1: kind of build yourself up, or you go to the

466
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 1: class and you fucking I did a four mile run

467
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,000
Speaker 1: the other day and it was so embarrassing how after

468
00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 1: two months I went from running eight my eight minute

469
00:23:35,680 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 1: miles even like some seven fifties and four miles to

470
00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:43,320
Speaker 1: an average of It was like and I tried my best,

471
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 1: and it was so demoralizing. But guess what I just

472
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:49,479
Speaker 1: that ron wasn't about being fast. I was just trying

473
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,560
Speaker 1: to My point is though, like if it's if it's

474
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:57,720
Speaker 1: something too lofty, too lofty, like for instance, I went

475
00:23:58,040 --> 00:23:59,439
Speaker 1: like I haven't worked out, and why I hit a

476
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:02,200
Speaker 1: ton of golf balls. I really did work my ass

477
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:05,000
Speaker 1: off with that stuff. But I stopped lifting completely and

478
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:08,640
Speaker 1: then I started looking for workouts that were like golf specific,

479
00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:11,280
Speaker 1: where essentially it's like how can I sit down and

480
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:14,480
Speaker 1: eat a sandwich and go like this and that will

481
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,880
Speaker 1: help my golf swing. Like, I was looking for workouts

482
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 1: that were the least tough as possible because I was

483
00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:22,800
Speaker 1: afraid of like having to work out so hard again

484
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:25,440
Speaker 1: and sweat. But then I just started doing the half

485
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:29,080
Speaker 1: hour at uh three months per hour on an eid

486
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:32,040
Speaker 1: incline on and I swear to God, once I did

487
00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 1: that four times, I'm like, okay, I'm ready to start

488
00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:37,400
Speaker 1: doing a little bit of circuit training. But it's literally

489
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:42,520
Speaker 1: just that little incremental step will open you up to

490
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:44,960
Speaker 1: being okay, I can, I can go workout. I'm telling

491
00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:47,320
Speaker 1: you this. It's weird, like and that's done big enough

492
00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:50,199
Speaker 1: workout in its own. The treadmill is a great I

493
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 1: hate treadmills. You know, if you can walk outside, it's

494
00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:55,560
Speaker 1: always better. But like it's it's that incline. I love

495
00:24:55,640 --> 00:24:59,399
Speaker 1: doing um. You know, if you're trying to get into well, no,

496
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:02,959
Speaker 1: I'm not giving you like doing that. You know, if

497
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,440
Speaker 1: you're starting out today, like with a workout regiment where

498
00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:08,199
Speaker 1: you're like, oh god, it just seems so insurmountable. Up

499
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:12,719
Speaker 1: twenty minutes on a treadmill and literally do three miles

500
00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 1: per hour, start on a three inclines to give yourself

501
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:19,640
Speaker 1: not just flat three incline, and then move up one

502
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,959
Speaker 1: degree and like move to a four after two minutes,

503
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,160
Speaker 1: and then get to the point where it's just you're

504
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 1: like heav hoeing and then start going back down every

505
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:31,800
Speaker 1: minute and you want three minutes is never gonna feel

506
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,160
Speaker 1: like a lot or three miles per hours, But when

507
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:36,240
Speaker 1: you're on a steep England, it's gonna work you up

508
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,200
Speaker 1: to a sweat and you're gonna feel like something and

509
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:40,800
Speaker 1: you'll just think about the thing that you want to tackle.

510
00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:45,200
Speaker 1: Because workouts don't have to be I swear to god,

511
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:47,920
Speaker 1: you guys don't have to be like they just passed

512
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 1: on a fucking add possible ad because it was some

513
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:55,479
Speaker 1: fucking intensive workout bullshit. And I just don't want to

514
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 1: promote that stuff on the show. And you know, God,

515
00:25:58,320 --> 00:26:00,199
Speaker 1: when we are in a position where we need too,

516
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,879
Speaker 1: I probably will. But it's nice to be able to

517
00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 1: say no because I don't believe in these high intensity workouts.

518
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:08,960
Speaker 1: I don't believe in the keep your belt on bike

519
00:26:09,359 --> 00:26:11,960
Speaker 1: stop with this eight under calorie burning eight under galleries,

520
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,560
Speaker 1: it's a fucking hamster wheel the like from me jiu jitsu.

521
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:17,879
Speaker 1: Like Andrew said, it was intense workout. Like I don't

522
00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:20,280
Speaker 1: go to jiu jitsu for a workout, which is what

523
00:26:20,359 --> 00:26:23,640
Speaker 1: I love about it. I go for personal achievement and

524
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:28,480
Speaker 1: for all the good little what I've run for. I run.

525
00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:32,359
Speaker 1: If it's if I'm running to burn calories or because

526
00:26:32,359 --> 00:26:34,440
Speaker 1: I want to work off a meal, I don't get

527
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:37,000
Speaker 1: to run. I don't get to do it if I'm running.

528
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:38,920
Speaker 1: Like that's my new rule for myself. It has been

529
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,879
Speaker 1: for two years. I've maybe slipped once where I was like,

530
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:43,919
Speaker 1: go extra hard because you ate too much less night,

531
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:47,679
Speaker 1: and I, you know, had to do some prayer about

532
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,879
Speaker 1: it or journaling about it because I swear to God.

533
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:53,919
Speaker 1: And it's easy for me to say, NICKI, you're skinny bitch.

534
00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:57,480
Speaker 1: You know, whatever weight you are, if you're trying to

535
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:00,679
Speaker 1: lose weight, if you abuse yourself with exercise and punish yourself,

536
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:02,919
Speaker 1: you're never gonna view it and it's always gonna be

537
00:27:02,960 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 1: something that only comes into your life when you were,

538
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,520
Speaker 1: you know, at your lowest, and that you punish yourself with.

539
00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 1: But it's really I never believed people when they were

540
00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:15,359
Speaker 1: like exercise can be something like healthy and that that

541
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,240
Speaker 1: you want to do. But if you if you don't

542
00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:20,080
Speaker 1: kill yourself over it, and you're not doing it to

543
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:23,280
Speaker 1: punish yourself or to like make a wait. I just

544
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 1: believe it's the best approach and you can be I've

545
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,159
Speaker 1: I've never I've had I right now, I've am the

546
00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,440
Speaker 1: best I've ever looked naked, and I have not dieted,

547
00:27:33,000 --> 00:27:36,480
Speaker 1: starved myself even for a second. I have not worked

548
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:39,879
Speaker 1: out to achieve anything in two almost a year and

549
00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 1: a half. And that's crazy because I was trying so

550
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:49,160
Speaker 1: hard since I've was eighteen to look a certain way.

551
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:52,480
Speaker 1: I tried for eighteen seventeen and a half years to

552
00:27:52,560 --> 00:27:55,320
Speaker 1: have the best body possible, and guess what it was

553
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:57,920
Speaker 1: there all along. All I had to do was stop

554
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:04,639
Speaker 1: starving exercise and you just have to spend thousands of

555
00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:08,760
Speaker 1: dollars on some big lush kettle belt it. I did

556
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 1: not get faked it, but sometimes it does look like

557
00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:14,640
Speaker 1: I would if I if I would, if I wanted them,

558
00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:17,520
Speaker 1: I would absolutely. I'm such an advocate for getting whatever

559
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:19,960
Speaker 1: kind of work done you want. But I really hope

560
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 1: that people don't punish themselves with exercise trying to get

561
00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:27,960
Speaker 1: in shape, or here's a culture, especially with men, where

562
00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: it's like, oh my god, I saw this TikTok the

563
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:36,920
Speaker 1: other day, and and the guys like, stop being look

564
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 1: at it, stop being a fucking pussy. That the fuck

565
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 1: like that stuff I did. And then the guy though,

566
00:28:44,760 --> 00:28:46,800
Speaker 1: and then it cuts to this guy who couldn't be

567
00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:49,239
Speaker 1: any more nerdy looking, and it cuts right to him

568
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:52,280
Speaker 1: and he goes, you get out of the gym. That's great,

569
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:57,680
Speaker 1: you get the gym. You It made me laugh so hard.

570
00:28:58,080 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 1: I love the aggressiveness of not doing something like you'll

571
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:04,920
Speaker 1: be lazy, you'll be lazy, and it's like that's what

572
00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:07,960
Speaker 1: you're hearing, and it's like, oh my god, it was

573
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:10,840
Speaker 1: just so fucking funny. And I yeah, I just think

574
00:29:10,880 --> 00:29:13,600
Speaker 1: like this idea of like, look, I respect someone like

575
00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 1: David Goggins. I listened to his book while falling asleep

576
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:20,440
Speaker 1: on the couch while you know pizza. No, there's something

577
00:29:20,440 --> 00:29:22,479
Speaker 1: to all of the stuff, but it's just no, no.

578
00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:24,440
Speaker 1: But my point is like like the idea of like

579
00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 1: you have to kill yourself, don't think of it like

580
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 1: that because you're gonna avoid it, like just fucking walk

581
00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:32,560
Speaker 1: on a three month per hour on an eight and

582
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 1: I promise you you're gonna feeling great. And I'm telling

583
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:40,480
Speaker 1: you like and listen. I've always said, if you want

584
00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:42,840
Speaker 1: to know how I got this point of view and

585
00:29:43,120 --> 00:29:45,000
Speaker 1: truly accepted in my heart, you can always damn me

586
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:47,560
Speaker 1: and I'll let you know my secret. But UM, I

587
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,440
Speaker 1: hope that some of this trickles down because I just

588
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 1: never thought it was ever possible to not work out

589
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 1: every day and not be counting calories, which I still

590
00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:59,719
Speaker 1: count glories because I have a brain and I know

591
00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 1: what calories are. But I don't stop counting calories like

592
00:30:03,040 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 1: I can't if I'm counting calories. You you stop telling

593
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:10,320
Speaker 1: me to count calories? Is that how it works? You stop?

594
00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:14,480
Speaker 1: Stop stop? You stop not counting them? You count? Um,

595
00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:23,080
Speaker 1: get a calculator, bit you've down? Um. Yes, I just

596
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 1: like yesterday I was counting. I was like adding up

597
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 1: because I was like, I feel like I'm so I

598
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:30,680
Speaker 1: went about it. I was so longer we'll go at

599
00:30:30,720 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 1: four am? And I was like starving, and I go,

600
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:36,280
Speaker 1: did I eat enough yesterday? And I added them up?

601
00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 1: And so there's sometimes I do that where I just

602
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,720
Speaker 1: go did it? Did I not get to I do

603
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:44,440
Speaker 1: like calories a day without question. How many carbs do

604
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:47,640
Speaker 1: you do? I don't think about carbs. I let my

605
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:54,880
Speaker 1: body decide, like is there cauf? Oh fuck yeah, o'meal

606
00:30:55,000 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 1: is carbs. O'Neal is just a car It's like a

607
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:02,560
Speaker 1: fucking carb. It's that's carp. But you do eliminate bread.

608
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:09,280
Speaker 1: It's like bread. I just it doesn't. It's something eat. Well,

609
00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:12,320
Speaker 1: that's a thing that I do that if you look

610
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 1: at me, eat a sandwich or like things, eat a

611
00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:18,400
Speaker 1: plate of food. I will avoid the things that are

612
00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 1: like loaded with just empty stuff because I love eating

613
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:24,640
Speaker 1: and I want to eat, and I just prefer the

614
00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:27,120
Speaker 1: taste of vegetables over bread. I would rather have four

615
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:29,840
Speaker 1: times the amount of vegetables than a piece of bread,

616
00:31:30,080 --> 00:31:31,800
Speaker 1: which is going to give me the same kind of

617
00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:35,280
Speaker 1: caloric nutrition, and that stuff can be. You know, I'm

618
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:39,440
Speaker 1: not perfect with like I eat weird fucking foods, but

619
00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 1: there's never a point where I'm trying to eat less

620
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:47,160
Speaker 1: of I used to eat, you know, salad, but I

621
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:49,880
Speaker 1: would still count it and try to get under you know,

622
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:52,160
Speaker 1: my aim was always like fourteen under color or something

623
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:54,400
Speaker 1: like that. Guess what, Yeah, but that was the aim.

624
00:31:54,600 --> 00:31:56,560
Speaker 1: But guess what I blow. I would I would get

625
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 1: up to four thousand because I would try to hit fourteen,

626
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 1: and then I would start to eat at night where

627
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:05,440
Speaker 1: I would think, oh, you know, no one's watching, God's

628
00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:08,280
Speaker 1: not watching now calculator, and then I would blow back.

629
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:13,320
Speaker 1: I would triplet because I was started. There should there

630
00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:15,280
Speaker 1: be a number in mind for people. Know, you know

631
00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:18,160
Speaker 1: what should be if you feel hungry, and but you

632
00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 1: got to recalibrate because I didn't know what hunger was.

633
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 1: I still don't know. Sometimes, even like when I woke

634
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 1: up a four in the morning, I was like, is

635
00:32:25,040 --> 00:32:28,080
Speaker 1: this because I'm anxious? Do I want to just have

636
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:31,240
Speaker 1: a taste in my mouth to like feel Because food

637
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:33,400
Speaker 1: is a drug, I mean the sugar and all the

638
00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:36,080
Speaker 1: things they set off, all these endorphins in our brain,

639
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:39,160
Speaker 1: the oxytoastin, and it's like a drug. So it's hard

640
00:32:39,160 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 1: to hard to recalibrate. But um, hunger feels um like

641
00:32:45,240 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 1: you can you can track it by just being like, Okay,

642
00:32:47,800 --> 00:32:50,320
Speaker 1: what did I eat? Did I eat enough? Today? Like

643
00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 1: I have like this is I don't I don't mean

644
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:56,840
Speaker 1: to like brag and talk about foods and like what

645
00:32:56,920 --> 00:33:00,320
Speaker 1: I eat but if this gives anyone any kind of

646
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:03,160
Speaker 1: hope for how their body could be, And this is

647
00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:04,840
Speaker 1: something I do no matter what, and I will do

648
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:08,120
Speaker 1: the rest of my life. I have like five six

649
00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:11,160
Speaker 1: hundred calorie breakfast every single morning, no matter what I

650
00:33:11,320 --> 00:33:14,600
Speaker 1: ate the night before, how late I ate it. Always

651
00:33:14,720 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 1: I mean, it will be four if I ate a

652
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:18,480
Speaker 1: ton the night before, because I'm just not as hungry

653
00:33:18,680 --> 00:33:20,600
Speaker 1: up to six to eight, Like I will go buck,

654
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 1: what if I'm still longer in the morning I'm eating

655
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: Because it's just it. You always think it's going to

656
00:33:26,680 --> 00:33:28,760
Speaker 1: fuck you over later on because you're like, I'm still

657
00:33:28,760 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 1: gonna eat as much as I did yesterday later on,

658
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: but it's like you just don't. And like that's I

659
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:37,200
Speaker 1: think that is the key, is eating a really hearty,

660
00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 1: filling breakfast. And I always used to roll my eyes

661
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:42,160
Speaker 1: at that and the idea. If you would have told

662
00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:44,480
Speaker 1: me two years ago that I would eat six hundred

663
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 1: calorie breakfast, I'm not joking you. I would have said

664
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:54,800
Speaker 1: I'd rather die rather yes. And I was thinking about

665
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 1: what I ate thinking about, like the departments I've lived in,

666
00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,240
Speaker 1: and like what I was like thinking about my and

667
00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:02,200
Speaker 1: like and I was like, oh my god. The apartment

668
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:04,760
Speaker 1: I lived on that we met on with the where

669
00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 1: balcony started. I literally never made a single meal. I

670
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:11,400
Speaker 1: didn't use my microwave even once. All eight protein bars

671
00:34:11,440 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 1: all I ate, and then I would eat, you know,

672
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:15,439
Speaker 1: salads at the cellar so I would get a little

673
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: bit of like veggies and actual food. Literally subsisted on

674
00:34:19,000 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 1: protein bars for three and a half four years of

675
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:27,719
Speaker 1: my life. Or Gain should build build a wing of

676
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:30,799
Speaker 1: their factory and name it after me, because I bought

677
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:32,439
Speaker 1: you that I used to go, I used to eat.

678
00:34:32,760 --> 00:34:35,279
Speaker 1: That's all I ate. I won't touch another organ bar

679
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:38,160
Speaker 1: the rest of my life. I like it. Disgusted me

680
00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:41,000
Speaker 1: that because it just but I liked it. That's what

681
00:34:41,120 --> 00:34:43,480
Speaker 1: I needed at that time, and that was fine. I

682
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:45,239
Speaker 1: liked it. There was never a time I ate those

683
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:47,520
Speaker 1: being like I wish I could have something else. I

684
00:34:47,560 --> 00:34:52,399
Speaker 1: wanted that so it but thank And right now I'm

685
00:34:52,480 --> 00:34:55,640
Speaker 1: in a fucking I'm still in my oatmeal protein oatmeal kick.

686
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:57,480
Speaker 1: It's all I want all the time. I have to

687
00:34:57,520 --> 00:35:00,399
Speaker 1: force myself to eat other things with other nutrition. It's

688
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:03,440
Speaker 1: just what I want. Am I fucking around with that oatmeal?

689
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:07,319
Speaker 1: So that I can do less calories. No, no, no,

690
00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 1: I'm eating just as much as I would if I

691
00:35:09,680 --> 00:35:12,080
Speaker 1: eat another food. But it's just all I want, and

692
00:35:12,080 --> 00:35:14,920
Speaker 1: I forgive myself for that because the other I'm not

693
00:35:15,040 --> 00:35:18,719
Speaker 1: starving myself anymore. And that's that's the fucking key. That's

694
00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:20,600
Speaker 1: why I get so frustrated. Last night, we were with

695
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:24,040
Speaker 1: my lover and he like, I could tell he was

696
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:26,920
Speaker 1: hungry because he mentioned like, I'm kind of hungry, like

697
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:29,520
Speaker 1: after we went to the hockey game. We're on our

698
00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:31,480
Speaker 1: way home and he was like, yeah, that chicken sandwich

699
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:33,160
Speaker 1: wasn't good. I'm hungry, And I was like, I have

700
00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:35,440
Speaker 1: to be with this guy through the night, and then

701
00:35:35,440 --> 00:35:37,239
Speaker 1: he's gonna wake up. I know he's gonna wake up,

702
00:35:37,280 --> 00:35:38,880
Speaker 1: not in time to get breakfast before he has to

703
00:35:38,920 --> 00:35:43,759
Speaker 1: go to work. He's gonna be and he I need

704
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:46,080
Speaker 1: to just stay out of people's fucking business because but

705
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,919
Speaker 1: I have to be around it, and then I needed

706
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:55,080
Speaker 1: But do you think that he changed his mood changes

707
00:35:55,080 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 1: when he's hungry. No, but I get frustrated sometimes not

708
00:35:57,640 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 1: with you, by like no, of course, with me, yeah,

709
00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:02,640
Speaker 1: but it but yeah, of course, you know I try

710
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:04,680
Speaker 1: to control your food too, because I'm like, we're about

711
00:36:04,719 --> 00:36:07,280
Speaker 1: to be on a seven hour flight and you don't

712
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:09,319
Speaker 1: have any snacks. I just don't like when people make

713
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:11,720
Speaker 1: assumptions of how I'm going to be in the future

714
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 1: before it even happens, even though they've been around. When

715
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:19,439
Speaker 1: you get you are different. When you're hungry, you don't

716
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:22,239
Speaker 1: get angry. Yeah, I've never I've never really like And

717
00:36:22,600 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 1: my lover doesn't get angry either. He just gets like,

718
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 1: he gets less fun, He gets less fun, he's not

719
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:32,719
Speaker 1: as present because he's and he doesn't even I don't

720
00:36:32,719 --> 00:36:36,040
Speaker 1: mean to. I believe that he doesn't even know he's

721
00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:41,120
Speaker 1: hungry and he's so picky with food. But I don't

722
00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:42,960
Speaker 1: you know what I can do. I can go go home.

723
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:44,400
Speaker 1: I don't want to be around you if you don't eat,

724
00:36:44,400 --> 00:36:46,520
Speaker 1: but then it leads to a huge fight. Well, I

725
00:36:46,560 --> 00:36:48,799
Speaker 1: think you need to wait to see if his attitude

726
00:36:49,400 --> 00:36:51,759
Speaker 1: is changing. Before you mentioned he got a meal in

727
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:58,359
Speaker 1: last night. Oh dude, I posted a video last night

728
00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:00,560
Speaker 1: before to get to the dues. We went to the game,

729
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:04,520
Speaker 1: into the Blues hockey game. That might have been the

730
00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:08,120
Speaker 1: most fun at a sporting event I've ever had, Like

731
00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:09,880
Speaker 1: I've had some I don't know what it was. I

732
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:15,080
Speaker 1: was feeling so fucking giddy. It was so silly. Tron dude,

733
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,560
Speaker 1: we got on the jumbo tron. I was on right

734
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:19,000
Speaker 1: away as I took my seat because I was wearing

735
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:21,319
Speaker 1: an obnoxious pink sweater. I think people just like saw

736
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:26,520
Speaker 1: yeah when when uh my love and I sat down,

737
00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:28,560
Speaker 1: they and you guys were Brenna and you were still

738
00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:33,000
Speaker 1: so much fren You guys were like at the concession stand.

739
00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:35,799
Speaker 1: We we got seated, we sat down first, and then

740
00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:37,759
Speaker 1: we showed up right away and we were like, oh,

741
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:39,839
Speaker 1: I got high and it was just two seconds and

742
00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:41,440
Speaker 1: then the whole rest of the game. I'm like, oh

743
00:37:41,480 --> 00:37:43,360
Speaker 1: my god, they're gonna put us on again. We posted

744
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,879
Speaker 1: an Instagram story. I tagged the Blues. You didn't tag

745
00:37:45,880 --> 00:37:48,240
Speaker 1: the Blues, which is your big mistake, because the Blues

746
00:37:48,239 --> 00:37:50,839
Speaker 1: are watching the story what they get tagged in. They

747
00:37:50,840 --> 00:37:52,239
Speaker 1: reached out to me and they were like, oh my god,

748
00:37:52,239 --> 00:37:54,000
Speaker 1: you're at the game. Let us know what sections so

749
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:55,759
Speaker 1: we can put you on the JumboTron and the like

750
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,360
Speaker 1: and call you out. And so I was in the

751
00:37:58,400 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 1: bathroom when I got it, and I'm like, okay, I

752
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 1: want I want my LoVa to be on with me

753
00:38:03,480 --> 00:38:05,680
Speaker 1: and be a fun moment. So I didn't tell them

754
00:38:05,719 --> 00:38:08,040
Speaker 1: which section I was in until he got back because

755
00:38:08,080 --> 00:38:09,799
Speaker 1: he was trying to go find merch to buy you

756
00:38:09,880 --> 00:38:12,520
Speaker 1: and Brenna. And I was like, God damn that his

757
00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 1: generosity made him miss the Jumbo Drawn. And so I'm

758
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:18,160
Speaker 1: sitting in my seat holding holding like, have the d

759
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:21,040
Speaker 1: M written of my section, row s numbers for all

760
00:38:21,080 --> 00:38:22,960
Speaker 1: of us so we all four could get on, And

761
00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:24,760
Speaker 1: I'm waiting to send it till he gets back because

762
00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:26,719
Speaker 1: I know they're going to do it right away. And

763
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:28,879
Speaker 1: I'm like, he's taking forever, and I'm like, fun, they're

764
00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:30,840
Speaker 1: gonna find me before I write back. And of course

765
00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,080
Speaker 1: they found me, and right as he's like at the

766
00:38:33,120 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 1: top and I'm like, I'm going hurry. I'm calling him

767
00:38:36,040 --> 00:38:37,880
Speaker 1: over because I have a feeling it's coming. And then

768
00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:40,200
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, boom, we're up on the Jumbo

769
00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:43,040
Speaker 1: Drawn and Andrew and I are just like, go, did

770
00:38:43,080 --> 00:38:48,080
Speaker 1: you see on my Instagram story there's a yes? I

771
00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:50,399
Speaker 1: said next year, hopefully my name will go up there too.

772
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 1: You could have gotten your name, and Andrew I recognized

773
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:56,960
Speaker 1: yesterday before I did by the way. A guy came

774
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:59,359
Speaker 1: up and was like Andrew Colin. He came up from

775
00:38:59,360 --> 00:39:03,399
Speaker 1: be honest. It was like, he is the nicest kid. Yeah,

776
00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 1: well he's not listening to this because he didn't even

777
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:09,879
Speaker 1: he knew from and then he learned about you from

778
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 1: me from being on Rougan, but he skipped our podcast

779
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:15,280
Speaker 1: and just went straight to puddles. I was like, dude,

780
00:39:15,360 --> 00:39:21,520
Speaker 1: everything he was right, what, oh, yeah, you're that girl

781
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:26,360
Speaker 1: aiden a order. He plays like football here for a

782
00:39:26,400 --> 00:39:30,680
Speaker 1: local college. Anyway, it was a kid I think I

783
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:33,719
Speaker 1: might have ever met, like he wrote me before. He's like, dude,

784
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:34,840
Speaker 1: I just want to hang out with you, like he

785
00:39:34,880 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 1: wrote this before. I don't know. And I realized he

786
00:39:37,400 --> 00:39:39,960
Speaker 1: was sitting he was sitting up in the nosebleed. He

787
00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:42,400
Speaker 1: figured out a way. Well, he saw you post that

788
00:39:42,440 --> 00:39:44,480
Speaker 1: you were there, and then he came down and found you.

789
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:46,880
Speaker 1: But I was freaking back to the Jumbo Troyn like

790
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:49,680
Speaker 1: so Nikki's on there like this, and so I get

791
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:56,360
Speaker 1: in there, I go yeah, someone said I should have proposed,

792
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:58,560
Speaker 1: well we're going to go back, because that was Hockey

793
00:39:58,560 --> 00:40:03,640
Speaker 1: games are so fast, they're so fun down everything's brightly lit.

794
00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:06,920
Speaker 1: The atmosphere is good, like baseball games, love for the

795
00:40:06,960 --> 00:40:10,399
Speaker 1: people watching, but this one is a smaller arena. It's

796
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:12,280
Speaker 1: my goal to play an arena that size. I realized

797
00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:14,840
Speaker 1: that's my next goal is to do twenty thousand seats.

798
00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:17,480
Speaker 1: Because I was asking my love about it and he

799
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:19,920
Speaker 1: was like, um, I go, how many seats this? He's

800
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:22,000
Speaker 1: like probably, And I go with Taylor Smith played this

801
00:40:22,040 --> 00:40:24,800
Speaker 1: and he goes, she has, but you know, probably not anymore.

802
00:40:24,960 --> 00:40:26,800
Speaker 1: She's probably doing. You know, I go to this is

803
00:40:26,840 --> 00:40:28,440
Speaker 1: where we saw the rolling Stones. He's like, no, that

804
00:40:28,560 --> 00:40:32,720
Speaker 1: was like six and I'm like, oh, it's it felt

805
00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:36,560
Speaker 1: small for some reason. It's the Enterprise Center. The Blues

806
00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 1: game was so fucking fun, dude. I mean we were down.

807
00:40:40,480 --> 00:40:44,319
Speaker 1: We got there five minutes into the game. We're down

808
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:47,759
Speaker 1: three nothing. I'm like, did they start? Did they just

809
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:50,160
Speaker 1: give them three goals? Because we were playing fucking great

810
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:52,520
Speaker 1: once we got there. This is all news to me

811
00:40:52,560 --> 00:40:55,319
Speaker 1: because I never once looked to the score. Yeah, but

812
00:40:55,360 --> 00:41:00,719
Speaker 1: we can't realize it was a good sports game. I

813
00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:02,959
Speaker 1: had fun because it was I got on the jumbo

814
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 1: Tron and I was with my fronts. But it's so

815
00:41:05,280 --> 00:41:07,600
Speaker 1: funny that you like it was a good game too. Know.

816
00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:09,719
Speaker 1: It was like like one of the best games of

817
00:41:09,880 --> 00:41:13,040
Speaker 1: the season. If if a hockey team is down by

818
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:15,600
Speaker 1: three goals, the game's over, it is Yeah, that doesn't

819
00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 1: we don't come back from you don't go to overtime

820
00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:19,920
Speaker 1: and then winning a shootout. It was really fun. It

821
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:27,200
Speaker 1: so fast he scored a goal. Okay, uh, Andrew, let's

822
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:34,800
Speaker 1: get to the news. Here we go. Oh boy, it's Wednesday, folks.

823
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:36,880
Speaker 1: You know what that means. It's Wednesday. I hope you're

824
00:41:36,880 --> 00:41:39,239
Speaker 1: having all the swells out there. We did because we

825
00:41:39,239 --> 00:41:41,719
Speaker 1: were on the jumbo tron. We're better than all of you.

826
00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:45,879
Speaker 1: Just kidding. Maybe all right, let's get into it. Oh man,

827
00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:48,319
Speaker 1: this story kind of made me nauseous. A woman was

828
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:53,360
Speaker 1: scarred during laser treatment after her beautition became distraction distracted

829
00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:57,439
Speaker 1: while arguing with her boyfriend on the phone. Oh my god,

830
00:41:57,480 --> 00:41:59,479
Speaker 1: I've I mean, I've heard of this before. Sabrina Jolie

831
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:01,920
Speaker 1: is my uh one of my best friends got scarred

832
00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 1: by laser. Like it looked like she had a trache

833
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:09,120
Speaker 1: otomy because she had like a hole internet from getting

834
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:11,319
Speaker 1: like hair removed. And she was at the I met

835
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,000
Speaker 1: her for the first time at just for laughs in

836
00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:15,520
Speaker 1: Montreal two thousand seven, and she had to wear a

837
00:42:15,560 --> 00:42:17,759
Speaker 1: scar for underno because she had the fucking hole and

838
00:42:17,840 --> 00:42:20,680
Speaker 1: she she got a fucking little son. No, no, as

839
00:42:20,719 --> 00:42:24,399
Speaker 1: she should have. Oh, she did get a settlement. Got

840
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 1: guess wait what so she was getting what laser retreatment?

841
00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:31,600
Speaker 1: Was she get laser rejuvenation? Oh? I need to know

842
00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 1: which kind, so I can wait because I love that

843
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:38,600
Speaker 1: she's in Turkey. How much money do you think she

844
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:43,319
Speaker 1: got in them? I'm guessing three thousand because it's going

845
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:47,480
Speaker 1: to be low. She got her money back two Oh

846
00:42:47,560 --> 00:42:50,080
Speaker 1: my god, what the fuck? Can you imagine getting your

847
00:42:50,080 --> 00:42:52,160
Speaker 1: face burnt and they go, hey, we could give you

848
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:55,800
Speaker 1: store credit. She looks like, you know, a Thanksgiving turkey

849
00:42:55,840 --> 00:43:00,640
Speaker 1: that was done in the deep friar. Wait, what the fun?

850
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:02,920
Speaker 1: She looks so young in that picture on the left,

851
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:06,840
Speaker 1: and then she looks, can I see it? The attorney.

852
00:43:07,080 --> 00:43:09,359
Speaker 1: The attorney is smart by putting up, you know, the

853
00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:12,359
Speaker 1: hottest photo she's ever taken. Well, not that smart, because

854
00:43:12,360 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 1: he only got her two wind turkey cash. Oh poor sweetie.

855
00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:23,879
Speaker 1: Oh asley Ehan suffered permanent facial scarring from a laser

856
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:27,960
Speaker 1: treatment going awry. So this was in Turkey though. Oh

857
00:43:28,080 --> 00:43:33,360
Speaker 1: my okay, well, I see what's going on here. Um,

858
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:35,360
Speaker 1: she went to a treat her scars, but only it

859
00:43:35,400 --> 00:43:38,040
Speaker 1: only made it worst. She has she had not only

860
00:43:38,040 --> 00:43:41,359
Speaker 1: physical pain, but psychological damage. Not only was my face

861
00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:43,560
Speaker 1: badly burned, but I had a lot of psychological distress.

862
00:43:44,160 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we think that the penalty for oh

863
00:43:46,120 --> 00:43:51,360
Speaker 1: my god, you know the burns. I think she's going

864
00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:54,680
Speaker 1: to be okay. I don't know how quickly after this

865
00:43:54,680 --> 00:43:56,799
Speaker 1: picture was taken, but this is kind of how you

866
00:43:56,840 --> 00:43:59,480
Speaker 1: look after a laser treatment. You have to go to

867
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:05,240
Speaker 1: another laser treatment. Probably she'd probably have to yea god,

868
00:44:05,520 --> 00:44:08,160
Speaker 1: but how fun I'm sorry, How like funked up? Is

869
00:44:08,200 --> 00:44:11,319
Speaker 1: it that the beautician was on the phone with her

870
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:14,880
Speaker 1: boyfriend arguing like she couldn't even wait until she was

871
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 1: done with the job. It's so wild, what people, I mean,

872
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:21,320
Speaker 1: we talked about on you going up to the woman

873
00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:23,600
Speaker 1: at the gate. I told that story at the opening

874
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,040
Speaker 1: of the show, you know, when she told that woman

875
00:44:25,080 --> 00:44:27,279
Speaker 1: to oh, you had left the you had left the

876
00:44:27,280 --> 00:44:29,520
Speaker 1: great The other night, Anya had told the story of

877
00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 1: going up to a woman at um when she was

878
00:44:31,680 --> 00:44:33,719
Speaker 1: on her way to Denver for my special who was

879
00:44:33,760 --> 00:44:35,799
Speaker 1: talking on her speakerphone loudly. She went up and was like, hey,

880
00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:37,480
Speaker 1: could you be quiet? And the woman was like no,

881
00:44:37,960 --> 00:44:39,520
Speaker 1: and she was like, she goes, we can all hear.

882
00:44:39,640 --> 00:44:41,279
Speaker 1: She goes, I don't care. She goes, you don't care,

883
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:43,960
Speaker 1: and she goes no, and she goes and on his

884
00:44:44,040 --> 00:44:46,799
Speaker 1: like okay, well great, and she goes, that's pretty rude,

885
00:44:46,800 --> 00:44:49,120
Speaker 1: and she goes, you're rude. And Anya was like shaking,

886
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:52,040
Speaker 1: like vibrating with fear, and then she went She ate

887
00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 1: a little bit longer, and the woman was a gate agent.

888
00:44:54,640 --> 00:44:56,600
Speaker 1: She had like a coat on, went on, your approached her,

889
00:44:56,680 --> 00:44:58,239
Speaker 1: she was like sitting in the corner and end up

890
00:44:58,239 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 1: being a gate agent. It's just like people. Have you

891
00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:04,480
Speaker 1: ever had someone like do something inappropriate while you're getting

892
00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:06,400
Speaker 1: a service? Yeah? I mean well I talked about the

893
00:45:06,400 --> 00:45:09,960
Speaker 1: other day to clipping the nails and um I had

894
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:16,160
Speaker 1: uh oh, well the eyebrow incident of two thousand six

895
00:45:16,239 --> 00:45:18,799
Speaker 1: before the wedding where they put on I don't even

896
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:20,440
Speaker 1: know if they put on wax. I think she just

897
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:24,359
Speaker 1: put on like Elmer's glue or something way worse than

898
00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:28,799
Speaker 1: wax and just just not really paying attention. You would

899
00:45:28,840 --> 00:45:32,399
Speaker 1: have noticed, and I hate when people funk up. Watch

900
00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:35,959
Speaker 1: it with those aseticians. Sometimes they really are just like

901
00:45:36,280 --> 00:45:38,160
Speaker 1: you don't. It could be the first day in the

902
00:45:38,239 --> 00:45:40,840
Speaker 1: job and they are using really hot stuff that and

903
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:43,799
Speaker 1: people's skin burns. It different. But here's the thing I

904
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,760
Speaker 1: think like when people this is the thing though, because

905
00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:50,920
Speaker 1: like with business, you can't apologize because once you apologize,

906
00:45:50,920 --> 00:45:54,719
Speaker 1: you yeah, so then you go, oh, no, this is

907
00:45:54,760 --> 00:45:58,319
Speaker 1: what it is your eyes are supposed to is it

908
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:01,440
Speaker 1: When you are at a restaurant and you have ordered

909
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 1: something like, oh, I need ranch on the side to

910
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:06,040
Speaker 1: you order it with your meal, right, and they write

911
00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:07,880
Speaker 1: it down and they go okay, and then they deliver

912
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:10,880
Speaker 1: your thing and then the waiter runs away and they

913
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:12,399
Speaker 1: haven't gotten the ranch, and you go, oh, they're going

914
00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 1: to get my ranch, they don't bring it whatever, and

915
00:46:14,760 --> 00:46:17,319
Speaker 1: then you know, three minutes later, you catch something just

916
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:19,640
Speaker 1: walking by refilling someone's water and you go, oh, hey,

917
00:46:19,640 --> 00:46:21,000
Speaker 1: can I get that side of ranch? And they go,

918
00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:23,200
Speaker 1: oh yeah, I'll get you side of ranch, Like it's

919
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:28,680
Speaker 1: the first time you ask. Is a fucking move. And

920
00:46:28,719 --> 00:46:32,000
Speaker 1: I don't like ranch lighting sucks. If you guys have

921
00:46:32,040 --> 00:46:35,960
Speaker 1: been ranch lighting, and let's call it. Let's kind when

922
00:46:36,239 --> 00:46:41,399
Speaker 1: whenever some you know a customer service agent or someone

923
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:44,880
Speaker 1: working in customer service, because listen, customer, you know I

924
00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:47,960
Speaker 1: have some much empathy for customers. I'm I'm tipping. I'm

925
00:46:47,960 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 1: tipping five dollars on every Starbucks drink I get in

926
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,879
Speaker 1: this holiday season and I really like I don't sunk

927
00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:56,560
Speaker 1: around because it sucks out there, and I hope, UM, Starbucks,

928
00:46:56,560 --> 00:47:00,120
Speaker 1: can you unize by the way, I'm in support of that, UM,

929
00:47:00,160 --> 00:47:05,440
Speaker 1: but it's uh and yeah, will you just please everyone

930
00:47:05,480 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 1: out there be nice to everyone working for unless you

931
00:47:10,520 --> 00:47:14,000
Speaker 1: get working for any kind of corporation where they don't

932
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,000
Speaker 1: they shouldn't take pride in it. And you know what

933
00:47:16,040 --> 00:47:18,919
Speaker 1: I'm talking about pretty much any job that isn't their

934
00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:23,320
Speaker 1: family business or something that is like their passion in life.

935
00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:26,840
Speaker 1: Just let them suck at their job because they're making

936
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:31,719
Speaker 1: fourteen dollars an hour. They can't afford to live an

937
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:35,120
Speaker 1: apartment on that like it's the system is broken. Just

938
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 1: be kind and tip generously if you can this holiday season.

939
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:43,040
Speaker 1: To everyone working at a car rental place, if they're

940
00:47:43,040 --> 00:47:46,560
Speaker 1: moving slowly at Starbucks, if they're moving like molasses at

941
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:50,040
Speaker 1: a fucking there even if they burn your face. It

942
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:53,879
Speaker 1: doesn't matter what job. If they burn your face, it's fine.

943
00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:56,440
Speaker 1: If you're paying four hundred dollars for a laser treatment,

944
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,280
Speaker 1: you should you you should get a level of respect.

945
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,440
Speaker 1: If you're being set dollars for a lot day, I'm sorry.

946
00:48:01,480 --> 00:48:03,799
Speaker 1: I know that's a Lotte for a latte, but it's

947
00:48:03,800 --> 00:48:06,200
Speaker 1: still seven dollars and this person doesn't really give a

948
00:48:06,200 --> 00:48:08,760
Speaker 1: funk about you. I hear you, Nikki, but I think seven.

949
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:11,799
Speaker 1: Or if you're at Starbucks and they pour that hot

950
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:15,360
Speaker 1: coffee on your face, you gotta have some empathy. Honestly,

951
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:17,120
Speaker 1: I think that is one of the best treatments out

952
00:48:17,120 --> 00:48:18,759
Speaker 1: there that no one knows about. And I was going

953
00:48:18,800 --> 00:48:21,239
Speaker 1: to do a TikTok about it, like, hey guys, here's

954
00:48:21,239 --> 00:48:25,319
Speaker 1: a secret Starbucks. You get a vanilla Lotte with non

955
00:48:25,360 --> 00:48:29,279
Speaker 1: fat milk, and you get extra hot, you gently pour

956
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 1: all over your face, wait two to three business days,

957
00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:36,080
Speaker 1: and then afterwards, when it all peels off, you will

958
00:48:36,120 --> 00:48:38,840
Speaker 1: have a shiny face because you will look like a

959
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:44,920
Speaker 1: burn victim. Look really doing. Um that's my taste for

960
00:48:45,040 --> 00:48:49,239
Speaker 1: a few bucks. Um Starbucks, Oh, I get it, Okay,

961
00:48:49,280 --> 00:48:54,240
Speaker 1: Next news story, that's pretty good, let's go and honestly, guys,

962
00:48:54,520 --> 00:48:57,480
Speaker 1: let's all and I want to hear from our listeners

963
00:48:58,200 --> 00:49:03,200
Speaker 1: not only about being ranchlet, but also about horrible cousin no, no, no,

964
00:49:03,320 --> 00:49:06,399
Speaker 1: about first of all, yes, or horrible customers. That's great

965
00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:08,760
Speaker 1: to hear stories so we can all learn to be better,

966
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:11,040
Speaker 1: but stories of where you went out of your way

967
00:49:11,080 --> 00:49:13,040
Speaker 1: to actually be a good customer to someone who is

968
00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:16,600
Speaker 1: giving you shitty service and doing the opposite and saying

969
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:19,160
Speaker 1: to them, hey, happy holidays, I hope you have a

970
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:21,280
Speaker 1: good day. Hey listen, I know you guys are slam.

971
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:23,760
Speaker 1: Don't worry about the weight. Thank you for even saying

972
00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:26,719
Speaker 1: sorry about the weight, or like just a thing where

973
00:49:26,719 --> 00:49:28,440
Speaker 1: you went out of your way when you didn't have to.

974
00:49:28,600 --> 00:49:30,359
Speaker 1: And I'm going to try to do the same. Also,

975
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,560
Speaker 1: if you work at Amazon, I kind of want to know,

976
00:49:32,600 --> 00:49:35,080
Speaker 1: like what's really going what's really going on if you

977
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:37,439
Speaker 1: work there? That really still being in bottles and stuff

978
00:49:37,480 --> 00:49:40,600
Speaker 1: like that as being poured, party whispering and so we

979
00:49:40,600 --> 00:49:43,680
Speaker 1: don't get caught by bezos and so that you know,

980
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:46,440
Speaker 1: Siri doesn't hear us, which's not serious, Lexa, But I

981
00:49:46,480 --> 00:49:48,960
Speaker 1: think this is when Alex starts listening. Once you start whispering,

982
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:52,120
Speaker 1: you have the robots are listening because they go, wait,

983
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:55,279
Speaker 1: hold on, someone's talking that. They're they're all like my mom,

984
00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:57,880
Speaker 1: Bobby and wrong. And then they go they didn't hear that,

985
00:49:58,440 --> 00:50:00,239
Speaker 1: hear that if you went warm wrong. Okay, one more

986
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:05,000
Speaker 1: new story. We can out loud loud? You know, I

987
00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 1: actually like doing the thing. Let's just do It's very

988
00:50:07,480 --> 00:50:14,320
Speaker 1: hard to edit this though, Oh it is why we whisper? Okay,

989
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:17,239
Speaker 1: why don't we just do soft spoken? Then? Okay? Is

990
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 1: that better? Yeah, try to do it as softly as

991
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:24,080
Speaker 1: you can. Studies in the case that the benefits of

992
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:28,440
Speaker 1: rebound sex are usually greater than the damage it causes.

993
00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:33,560
Speaker 1: The benefits you're seeing the benefits of rebound sex are

994
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:39,239
Speaker 1: greater causes. I would um, I would agree because I

995
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 1: do think that rebound sex is not based on someone

996
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:47,520
Speaker 1: being open to falling insanely in love with someone. So

997
00:50:47,600 --> 00:50:50,080
Speaker 1: you're not going to have those negative effects afterwards of

998
00:50:50,120 --> 00:50:52,719
Speaker 1: being addicted to someone because you're trying to get over

999
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:57,440
Speaker 1: someone you're already addicted to. Thus it's only going to um,

1000
00:50:57,520 --> 00:51:01,560
Speaker 1: it's going to innesthetize that pain that you're experiencing. Oh,

1001
00:51:01,640 --> 00:51:05,799
Speaker 1: you're trying to get over rather than create a new pain. Um,

1002
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:09,360
Speaker 1: so that is good news for everyone was using rebound

1003
00:51:09,360 --> 00:51:12,520
Speaker 1: sex as a way to cope with your broken heart.

1004
00:51:12,680 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 1: I never thought of it this way, honestly until I

1005
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:19,920
Speaker 1: softly spoke it softly spoken, because I guess that's the

1006
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:23,480
Speaker 1: only thing, the only way I could learn at all. Yeah,

1007
00:51:23,440 --> 00:51:25,560
Speaker 1: I get out there and rebound just be safe. But

1008
00:51:25,600 --> 00:51:27,799
Speaker 1: I always felt like when rebounding that you're like trying

1009
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 1: to fill a void. And I guess if you're not

1010
00:51:29,760 --> 00:51:34,560
Speaker 1: looking at it, trying to just because it can make

1011
00:51:34,600 --> 00:51:37,200
Speaker 1: you feel more secure with yourself of like how you look,

1012
00:51:37,480 --> 00:51:40,160
Speaker 1: so you are because someone else is fucking hell. Yeah,

1013
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:42,719
Speaker 1: I think that's that's all true too, And it just

1014
00:51:43,200 --> 00:51:46,600
Speaker 1: it really did. I remember that scene in um, the

1015
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:51,400
Speaker 1: John Cusack movie High Fidelity, where she's his ex girlfriend

1016
00:51:51,440 --> 00:51:53,120
Speaker 1: is grieving the loss of her father and she's just

1017
00:51:53,160 --> 00:51:55,760
Speaker 1: crying all the time, and she's she sleeps with her ex.

1018
00:51:56,160 --> 00:51:58,160
Speaker 1: She goes, I just want to feel Wait, that's a

1019
00:51:58,200 --> 00:52:00,600
Speaker 1: really good impression, if you know what I'm talking about this,

1020
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:05,239
Speaker 1: I just want to feel something else, and then she

1021
00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:07,319
Speaker 1: gets on top of him and like starts grinding. It's

1022
00:52:07,320 --> 00:52:09,279
Speaker 1: such a hot scene. But you know that feeling of

1023
00:52:09,320 --> 00:52:12,040
Speaker 1: being so sad you want to feel anything else. That's

1024
00:52:12,040 --> 00:52:13,440
Speaker 1: why we reach for food. That's why we reached for

1025
00:52:13,480 --> 00:52:17,560
Speaker 1: drugs like sex can be a soothing balm to put

1026
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:20,960
Speaker 1: on your broken heart. So go out there and get it.

1027
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:22,719
Speaker 1: That's that's good news. Let's take a break and we'll

1028
00:52:22,760 --> 00:52:24,960
Speaker 1: come back with hold on before we go to a

1029
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:28,520
Speaker 1: break before on our other break, you said Andrew had

1030
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:33,319
Speaker 1: some news. Let's take a break and come back with

1031
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:36,279
Speaker 1: Andrew's news. Okay, is that? Okay? I want to tease it.

1032
00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:42,640
Speaker 1: You gotta listen to the commercial first. All right, we're

1033
00:52:42,760 --> 00:52:48,080
Speaker 1: back Andrew. What's the news. Oh? Uh, so Brandon and

1034
00:52:48,120 --> 00:52:50,920
Speaker 1: I are moving in together. Yes, you announced that the

1035
00:52:50,960 --> 00:52:55,520
Speaker 1: other day. And Louis, we scoured the area. We went

1036
00:52:55,600 --> 00:53:02,960
Speaker 1: to Lincoln, we went to uh Grove, we went to

1037
00:53:03,360 --> 00:53:07,200
Speaker 1: Park Central West Ends, we went all over the place,

1038
00:53:07,239 --> 00:53:09,920
Speaker 1: both ends of the Central West. We went all over.

1039
00:53:10,040 --> 00:53:18,480
Speaker 1: We saw more than and we have decided. After drumroll, please,

1040
00:53:20,840 --> 00:53:23,920
Speaker 1: and I know this is gonna this is gonna. People

1041
00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:26,399
Speaker 1: are gonna be talking about this. No, people already see

1042
00:53:26,400 --> 00:53:34,440
Speaker 1: it coming. We're moving place nine floors down in the

1043
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:40,200
Speaker 1: same building. And he's not. It's really happening. You guys.

1044
00:53:40,400 --> 00:53:43,840
Speaker 1: We found a one bedroom in the building and love it.

1045
00:53:44,719 --> 00:53:49,440
Speaker 1: I'm thrilled. This building is a great building. How we

1046
00:53:49,480 --> 00:53:51,920
Speaker 1: feel about it. And honestly, this morning we had a

1047
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:54,239
Speaker 1: little bit of a technical thing that had to take place,

1048
00:53:54,239 --> 00:53:56,319
Speaker 1: and I go, oh my god, I'm going to have

1049
00:53:56,360 --> 00:53:59,080
Speaker 1: to do that stuff if Andrew doesn't stay close enough

1050
00:53:59,120 --> 00:54:02,440
Speaker 1: to come over and fix it before the podcast. Not anymore, buddy,

1051
00:54:02,680 --> 00:54:07,320
Speaker 1: you just take the elevator up and boom, wait what Okay,

1052
00:54:07,360 --> 00:54:10,680
Speaker 1: we're moving. No. I'm so excited to have you both

1053
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:13,680
Speaker 1: in the building because I will, like, it'll just be

1054
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 1: fun like sometimes last night, Brenna can just come up

1055
00:54:17,440 --> 00:54:19,279
Speaker 1: here and we can have some girl time. We can

1056
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:21,680
Speaker 1: sing some Taylor Swift. You guys can come up here

1057
00:54:21,680 --> 00:54:24,399
Speaker 1: and we can watch movies like well, we'll probably hang

1058
00:54:24,400 --> 00:54:26,680
Speaker 1: out more because of this. I think it's going to

1059
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:29,200
Speaker 1: be a great thing. And I do. Uh yeah, I'm

1060
00:54:29,239 --> 00:54:33,880
Speaker 1: gonna have to fucking you know, my commute to work

1061
00:54:34,160 --> 00:54:37,239
Speaker 1: and moving down nine floors. I never I want to

1062
00:54:37,280 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 1: die in this fucking building. I love it. Let's do

1063
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:45,839
Speaker 1: our our wild card Wednesday game. We are playing Esther

1064
00:54:45,960 --> 00:54:52,399
Speaker 1: Perel's new ish board game called where should We Begin? Yep,

1065
00:54:52,800 --> 00:54:55,000
Speaker 1: and that's I said it like a question because it

1066
00:54:55,080 --> 00:54:57,080
Speaker 1: is a question, but I said the wrong kind of question,

1067
00:54:57,640 --> 00:55:00,680
Speaker 1: where should we Begin, which is also the name of

1068
00:55:00,719 --> 00:55:04,319
Speaker 1: her podcast where she Uh it's a great podcast. She's

1069
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 1: an amazing woman who uh opens up her therapy office

1070
00:55:09,200 --> 00:55:10,600
Speaker 1: and you get to listen to couples go to a

1071
00:55:10,640 --> 00:55:13,160
Speaker 1: couple of therapy and it's so helpful. But this is

1072
00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:15,719
Speaker 1: a fun game where you pick two cards. One is

1073
00:55:15,760 --> 00:55:17,520
Speaker 1: like to set up the premise of like, we're going

1074
00:55:17,560 --> 00:55:22,000
Speaker 1: to tell a story about this thing mirror that Yeah,

1075
00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:26,600
Speaker 1: that yeah, the Taylor Swift magic gate ball, like in

1076
00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:30,960
Speaker 1: your head, you asked it, yeah, runaway, don't say yes

1077
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:36,040
Speaker 1: run away? Oh shit? All right, well and that thing

1078
00:55:36,040 --> 00:55:41,000
Speaker 1: always gets it right, all right? About the subject. There's

1079
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:42,960
Speaker 1: one card that's a subject, and then there's one card

1080
00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:45,600
Speaker 1: that is um or. One card is a question, and

1081
00:55:45,640 --> 00:55:49,319
Speaker 1: one card is like within the that question, what's the

1082
00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:53,800
Speaker 1: what's the thing we're talking about? Yes, give us the

1083
00:55:53,880 --> 00:55:56,719
Speaker 1: two things. Okay, So the card for the story is

1084
00:55:57,320 --> 00:56:00,759
Speaker 1: I'll never forget being bullied by So that's what we

1085
00:56:00,800 --> 00:56:06,640
Speaker 1: start our story with. And then share something awkward. Okay, Well,

1086
00:56:06,719 --> 00:56:10,799
Speaker 1: I've shared this before, um, but let me share a

1087
00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:13,120
Speaker 1: different one. So you have to start the story with

1088
00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:16,400
Speaker 1: I'll never forget being bullied by and then you have

1089
00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:20,279
Speaker 1: to share within that answering that question something awkward like that.

1090
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 1: It has to have the theme of awkwardness. Does that

1091
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:25,640
Speaker 1: make sense? No, Im, I talked about that. You got it? Okay,

1092
00:56:25,680 --> 00:56:29,000
Speaker 1: got it? Um. I'll never forget being bullied by a

1093
00:56:29,080 --> 00:56:32,120
Speaker 1: female comic in St. Louis when I first started, between

1094
00:56:32,160 --> 00:56:40,680
Speaker 1: the years of two thousand, two three and two thousand. Now. Um,

1095
00:56:40,719 --> 00:56:42,960
Speaker 1: I'm sure she still hates me and is trying to

1096
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:46,640
Speaker 1: ruin me. But good luck, bitch. Um she I forgive

1097
00:56:46,640 --> 00:56:49,560
Speaker 1: her totally. No, I don't. Um, She's never apologized and

1098
00:56:49,640 --> 00:56:51,680
Speaker 1: I should. I need to work on forgiving her anyway.

1099
00:56:51,960 --> 00:56:55,919
Speaker 1: She I remember around two I moved back home to St.

1100
00:56:55,960 --> 00:57:00,880
Speaker 1: Louis after failing in Uh. Now, I moved home in Saintlis.

1101
00:57:00,920 --> 00:57:03,000
Speaker 1: After failing, I moved to I moved to l A

1102
00:57:03,520 --> 00:57:06,040
Speaker 1: in two thousand and six after getting the last comic

1103
00:57:06,120 --> 00:57:08,799
Speaker 1: standing and having done comedy for a couple of years.

1104
00:57:08,800 --> 00:57:11,680
Speaker 1: And I, you know, I just she hated me. There's

1105
00:57:11,920 --> 00:57:15,080
Speaker 1: many stories I could tell of this girl lying about me,

1106
00:57:15,120 --> 00:57:17,440
Speaker 1: sleeping with comics, saying I'm not funny, just trying to

1107
00:57:17,480 --> 00:57:19,240
Speaker 1: get all of my friends at the Saintless Funny Bute

1108
00:57:19,240 --> 00:57:22,440
Speaker 1: to hate me, and UM in in a way was

1109
00:57:22,480 --> 00:57:24,840
Speaker 1: successful at that I had to. Actually, that's why I

1110
00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:28,480
Speaker 1: left in UM two thousand six sooner than I probably

1111
00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:32,440
Speaker 1: would have, because I just everyone didn't like me anymore.

1112
00:57:32,520 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 1: That's not everyone, but a lot of people. It was

1113
00:57:34,720 --> 00:57:36,840
Speaker 1: just awkward to go up there my home club, because

1114
00:57:36,840 --> 00:57:39,240
Speaker 1: this woman had told made everyone think I wasn't funny.

1115
00:57:39,320 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 1: She also thought Tommy Johnagan wasn't funny, who was another

1116
00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:44,800
Speaker 1: of my We were both the new comics on the

1117
00:57:44,800 --> 00:57:47,440
Speaker 1: scene in St. Louis. If you think Tommy Johnagan's not

1118
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:50,720
Speaker 1: funny when she when I found out that, I was like, oh, well,

1119
00:57:50,720 --> 00:57:53,640
Speaker 1: then she's that She could be wrong about me because

1120
00:57:53,640 --> 00:57:56,320
Speaker 1: she was really funny. She's funny, and she was the

1121
00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:59,360
Speaker 1: top comic on the scene when I started. It was her,

1122
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:02,200
Speaker 1: Greg Warren and this guy Jeremy Essig, and she got

1123
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:04,960
Speaker 1: Jeremy against me. Jeremy and I are now really good

1124
00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:08,840
Speaker 1: friends and have patched things up, but she just fucking

1125
00:58:08,840 --> 00:58:11,560
Speaker 1: hated me. She said that the high school cheerleader shouldn't

1126
00:58:11,560 --> 00:58:15,400
Speaker 1: be doing stand up. I'm like, bitch, I don't have rhythm.

1127
00:58:16,200 --> 00:58:21,320
Speaker 1: You know, I don't getting She probably loved that, but anyway,

1128
00:58:22,680 --> 00:58:26,840
Speaker 1: she um, I moved back in two thousand yeah. Yeah,

1129
00:58:27,200 --> 00:58:31,160
Speaker 1: so I moved back in two thousand nine after I

1130
00:58:31,200 --> 00:58:32,520
Speaker 1: was on The Tonight Show. I had a little bit

1131
00:58:32,520 --> 00:58:34,800
Speaker 1: of success, but like instantly was on the Tonight Show

1132
00:58:34,840 --> 00:58:37,680
Speaker 1: in January two thousand nine, and then moved back home

1133
00:58:37,720 --> 00:58:40,440
Speaker 1: because I was still, you know, having to eat subway

1134
00:58:40,520 --> 00:58:43,439
Speaker 1: for all my meals and borrow money from my parents.

1135
00:58:43,480 --> 00:58:45,680
Speaker 1: I was broke. Moved back home. It felt like such

1136
00:58:45,680 --> 00:58:47,400
Speaker 1: a failure. Tail between my legs and I come back

1137
00:58:47,440 --> 00:58:49,480
Speaker 1: to the Funny Bones. She's there this time. I'm like

1138
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:54,000
Speaker 1: a drunk at this point, and so I'm matching her vibe. Um,

1139
00:58:54,040 --> 00:58:56,040
Speaker 1: and I have a little bit more confidence, but not

1140
00:58:56,120 --> 00:58:57,680
Speaker 1: that much, and I'm trying to be friends with her

1141
00:58:57,720 --> 00:59:00,720
Speaker 1: now because I'm like, listen, let's put this behind us.

1142
00:59:01,280 --> 00:59:04,280
Speaker 1: She wanted I get the balls to confront her because

1143
00:59:04,320 --> 00:59:07,120
Speaker 1: Greg Warren actually did me a favor and heard her

1144
00:59:07,120 --> 00:59:09,320
Speaker 1: talking ship during one of my sets in the back

1145
00:59:09,320 --> 00:59:11,400
Speaker 1: of the room and goes, why don't you why don't

1146
00:59:11,400 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 1: you ask NICKI if she had sex with all these

1147
00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:15,240
Speaker 1: people that you say that she had sex with that

1148
00:59:15,240 --> 00:59:16,960
Speaker 1: wrote her jokes for her? Go why don't you ask her?

1149
00:59:16,960 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 1: Why don't you have you ever asked her about it?

1150
00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:21,280
Speaker 1: And she goes, fine, I will, and so I she

1151
00:59:21,760 --> 00:59:24,200
Speaker 1: We were at at the Jazz Club after this, the set,

1152
00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:25,440
Speaker 1: the same one we were at the other night. The

1153
00:59:25,480 --> 00:59:27,560
Speaker 1: fact that I've been to these places now gives the

1154
00:59:27,600 --> 00:59:30,000
Speaker 1: story so much, like the fact that you gave this

1155
00:59:30,120 --> 00:59:35,320
Speaker 1: lady so much. She's so fucking intonating dude. She is.

1156
00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:39,880
Speaker 1: She's Regina George of like me and girls. And so

1157
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:43,440
Speaker 1: I go over to the Every time we would do

1158
00:59:43,480 --> 00:59:45,360
Speaker 1: the Funny Bone, it was like this big night. Everyone

1159
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:47,800
Speaker 1: would be there. It was this big, fucking cool hangout,

1160
00:59:47,800 --> 00:59:49,080
Speaker 1: and then we would go next door and we would

1161
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:51,160
Speaker 1: just drink and do karaoke. Was so much fun. It

1162
00:59:51,240 --> 00:59:53,280
Speaker 1: was the best time. And I was always scared of

1163
00:59:53,280 --> 00:59:54,760
Speaker 1: her though. She would stay at the bar and stay

1164
00:59:54,800 --> 00:59:56,640
Speaker 1: with her friends, and I would like be with mine

1165
00:59:57,160 --> 01:00:01,520
Speaker 1: and I she just goes neck and she like summoned me,

1166
01:00:01,560 --> 01:00:03,640
Speaker 1: and I walked over and she was like, all right,

1167
01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:08,240
Speaker 1: did you have sex with Polly Shore? Doug Benson. Bige

1168
01:00:09,560 --> 01:00:12,840
Speaker 1: kept naming all these people, and I go, no, no,

1169
01:00:13,320 --> 01:00:15,400
Speaker 1: I blew one of those people. And it wasn't the

1170
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:17,280
Speaker 1: two people I listed. Just by the way, I go,

1171
01:00:17,360 --> 01:00:19,000
Speaker 1: one of those people in your list. I did blow.

1172
01:00:19,320 --> 01:00:21,560
Speaker 1: But I didn't accept the guest spot that he offered me.

1173
01:00:21,880 --> 01:00:24,240
Speaker 1: I actually turned it down because I thought, there's no

1174
01:00:24,240 --> 01:00:25,840
Speaker 1: way I'm going to perform on his show. I'm so

1175
01:00:25,880 --> 01:00:28,520
Speaker 1: bad at comedy. I've never accepted anything from him in

1176
01:00:28,600 --> 01:00:30,840
Speaker 1: terms of I liked him, I wanted to marry. I

1177
01:00:30,880 --> 01:00:33,520
Speaker 1: thought I was gonna marry him. That's why, which I

1178
01:00:33,520 --> 01:00:35,040
Speaker 1: didn't deserve to give her any of this, but I

1179
01:00:35,080 --> 01:00:37,160
Speaker 1: wanted to be honest and show, Okay, well i'll give

1180
01:00:37,200 --> 01:00:39,600
Speaker 1: you one of those. But no, I didn't have sex

1181
01:00:39,640 --> 01:00:42,280
Speaker 1: with Polly Shot Doug Benson. I worked with them, and

1182
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:44,400
Speaker 1: so she went from saying I wasn't funny too. When

1183
01:00:44,400 --> 01:00:46,760
Speaker 1: I got funny, she used to say, people wrote my

1184
01:00:46,840 --> 01:00:49,160
Speaker 1: jokes for me, so I was never gonna win ever.

1185
01:00:49,600 --> 01:00:52,200
Speaker 1: And so I always tell young female comics that when

1186
01:00:52,440 --> 01:00:54,240
Speaker 1: they'll say you're not funny, then you get funny, and

1187
01:00:54,240 --> 01:00:56,680
Speaker 1: they'll say men wrote jokes for you, so you'll never win.

1188
01:00:56,880 --> 01:00:59,080
Speaker 1: You'll never fucking win or they'll say you stole jokes

1189
01:00:59,080 --> 01:01:02,840
Speaker 1: for male comics. That's what they do. So anyway, sorry

1190
01:01:02,840 --> 01:01:08,520
Speaker 1: to make this long story that. So I remember, she

1191
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:14,840
Speaker 1: just goes, yeah, yeah, well my wife is all I mean,

1192
01:01:14,840 --> 01:01:17,920
Speaker 1: my husband is all over all my micro penis jokes

1193
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:24,160
Speaker 1: turned into clip jokes. So I um, she she goes

1194
01:01:24,320 --> 01:01:25,920
Speaker 1: best parton and I go, no, no, no one. I

1195
01:01:25,960 --> 01:01:27,440
Speaker 1: was just like trying to plead with her, and she

1196
01:01:27,520 --> 01:01:30,600
Speaker 1: just goes, well, I don't believe you, but o guy.

1197
01:01:30,760 --> 01:01:33,840
Speaker 1: And I remember being like thank you, like just for

1198
01:01:33,880 --> 01:01:37,040
Speaker 1: saying like whatever, and I remember being like, thank god,

1199
01:01:37,120 --> 01:01:39,640
Speaker 1: really patched up now. But after that I kind of

1200
01:01:39,640 --> 01:01:41,920
Speaker 1: got this, like I started getting a little bit more

1201
01:01:41,960 --> 01:01:44,280
Speaker 1: confident because I just saw her for what she was,

1202
01:01:44,320 --> 01:01:47,720
Speaker 1: which was like a sad person and filled with hate.

1203
01:01:47,720 --> 01:01:49,880
Speaker 1: And and then Greg Warren was the only one out

1204
01:01:49,880 --> 01:01:51,520
Speaker 1: of all my friends, by the way, who stood up

1205
01:01:51,560 --> 01:01:54,080
Speaker 1: for me and without doing without being mean to her,

1206
01:01:54,320 --> 01:01:56,520
Speaker 1: without just he really did stand up for me. And

1207
01:01:56,600 --> 01:02:00,760
Speaker 1: thank God for that guy, because everyone else. One day

1208
01:02:00,840 --> 01:02:02,360
Speaker 1: I have to say this one last thing. I know

1209
01:02:02,400 --> 01:02:04,280
Speaker 1: this is so long, like no, no, I think it

1210
01:02:04,440 --> 01:02:06,800
Speaker 1: is great, But do you feel like because you got

1211
01:02:06,800 --> 01:02:09,120
Speaker 1: at least a little bit, you got not a little

1212
01:02:09,120 --> 01:02:12,640
Speaker 1: bit a lot of success for did that feel when

1213
01:02:12,680 --> 01:02:14,720
Speaker 1: you came back to St. Louis Did you feel like

1214
01:02:14,760 --> 01:02:17,439
Speaker 1: a failure or did you feel like, oh yeah, because

1215
01:02:17,440 --> 01:02:19,400
Speaker 1: it didn't matter. She thought I was tricking people. She

1216
01:02:19,560 --> 01:02:22,800
Speaker 1: thinks she's getting the Tonight show and all that. Still

1217
01:02:22,880 --> 01:02:25,840
Speaker 1: didn't you know, she always said, this is what she said.

1218
01:02:26,200 --> 01:02:29,240
Speaker 1: So when I was in St. Louis, so in two

1219
01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:33,040
Speaker 1: thousand eight, right before this Tonight show, December, I'm I

1220
01:02:33,080 --> 01:02:35,440
Speaker 1: went home for Christmas, living in l A at the time,

1221
01:02:35,480 --> 01:02:37,320
Speaker 1: but went home for Christmas and I started dating. I

1222
01:02:37,400 --> 01:02:39,280
Speaker 1: got my first boyfriend. He was a comic on the

1223
01:02:39,280 --> 01:02:42,040
Speaker 1: scene who was like, in my opinion, the best writer.

1224
01:02:42,240 --> 01:02:45,560
Speaker 1: I was obsessed with him and his jokes and got him.

1225
01:02:45,840 --> 01:02:49,200
Speaker 1: We finally started dating um and then we're doing long

1226
01:02:49,240 --> 01:02:51,160
Speaker 1: distance from l I went to l A. And they

1227
01:02:51,280 --> 01:02:54,120
Speaker 1: used to do this thing on this website, Rooftop Comedy,

1228
01:02:54,120 --> 01:02:58,400
Speaker 1: where they would broadcast uh the open mics the next

1229
01:02:58,480 --> 01:03:00,600
Speaker 1: day like they would they would take the open mics

1230
01:03:00,600 --> 01:03:02,040
Speaker 1: and chop up all the sets and I could watch

1231
01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:03,520
Speaker 1: everyone set and I got to feel like I was

1232
01:03:03,560 --> 01:03:06,920
Speaker 1: still part of it. And so I remember watching on

1233
01:03:07,000 --> 01:03:09,600
Speaker 1: my roommates computer in l A Lisa's computer. I like

1234
01:03:09,640 --> 01:03:11,400
Speaker 1: went into her room because I wanted to watch my

1235
01:03:11,400 --> 01:03:14,360
Speaker 1: ex boyfriend Jeff set and see all my friends. And

1236
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:16,600
Speaker 1: I was like, let's just watch this girls set because

1237
01:03:16,600 --> 01:03:18,640
Speaker 1: I just have a feeling there's like a vibe that

1238
01:03:18,760 --> 01:03:22,480
Speaker 1: she's talking about me, even though I hadn't really had

1239
01:03:22,520 --> 01:03:24,040
Speaker 1: a run in with her for a while. Maybe actually

1240
01:03:24,080 --> 01:03:26,360
Speaker 1: over Christmas we had to run in. So this was

1241
01:03:26,440 --> 01:03:31,800
Speaker 1: during Sarah Palin times. By the way, okay um eight.

1242
01:03:31,840 --> 01:03:35,160
Speaker 1: You know, like Obama had just one, but Sarah Palin

1243
01:03:35,240 --> 01:03:37,960
Speaker 1: was still very much in the global consciousness, and she

1244
01:03:38,120 --> 01:03:41,240
Speaker 1: did a joke where she goes, you know, the thing

1245
01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:44,640
Speaker 1: about Sarah Palin is it's just because she's hot. That's

1246
01:03:44,640 --> 01:03:48,280
Speaker 1: the only reason people even give her even a chance

1247
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:50,480
Speaker 1: to even talk, because she's hot, because they want to

1248
01:03:50,520 --> 01:03:54,080
Speaker 1: suck her. And she goes and she's blathering on about

1249
01:03:54,080 --> 01:03:56,760
Speaker 1: her and she goes, no matter what insane things that

1250
01:03:56,800 --> 01:03:59,280
Speaker 1: woman says, there's always a group of guys in the

1251
01:03:59,280 --> 01:04:01,800
Speaker 1: back of the room that it's like, I don't know,

1252
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:04,000
Speaker 1: she's kind of cool because they want to fuck her.

1253
01:04:04,280 --> 01:04:06,440
Speaker 1: And I just remember watching that set being like I

1254
01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:08,520
Speaker 1: think this joke is about me, Like I just have

1255
01:04:08,600 --> 01:04:10,680
Speaker 1: a And it was so narcissist of me to even

1256
01:04:10,680 --> 01:04:13,160
Speaker 1: think that, because it's like, you know, obviously she thinks

1257
01:04:13,160 --> 01:04:16,000
Speaker 1: this about every right. But I just was like, there's

1258
01:04:16,120 --> 01:04:20,880
Speaker 1: just a feeling. So I kept that feeling in my system,

1259
01:04:20,920 --> 01:04:22,560
Speaker 1: but I didn't say anything about it until I went

1260
01:04:22,600 --> 01:04:26,640
Speaker 1: back home. Um, you know in April of that year,

1261
01:04:26,680 --> 01:04:29,000
Speaker 1: and I remember I was talking with my friend Gabe Kia,

1262
01:04:29,080 --> 01:04:31,520
Speaker 1: who was a best friend comic of mine that was

1263
01:04:31,560 --> 01:04:34,080
Speaker 1: in the room that night, and I remember just we're

1264
01:04:34,120 --> 01:04:36,600
Speaker 1: talking about me watching sets or we're talking about this girl,

1265
01:04:36,600 --> 01:04:39,680
Speaker 1: and I go, there's one joke she did and I

1266
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:41,360
Speaker 1: was like, and I just I got Gabe, I no,

1267
01:04:41,440 --> 01:04:43,200
Speaker 1: this is insane. We were just like smoking bout all

1268
01:04:43,240 --> 01:04:45,240
Speaker 1: the time, just talking about stuff, and I go, I

1269
01:04:45,320 --> 01:04:47,720
Speaker 1: just feel like she did this one joke about me.

1270
01:04:47,840 --> 01:04:50,840
Speaker 1: It's so stupid. And he goes, wait they posted that,

1271
01:04:51,080 --> 01:04:54,360
Speaker 1: And I go what And he's like, I don't think they.

1272
01:04:54,480 --> 01:04:57,200
Speaker 1: I don't think they. Wait what And I go, what

1273
01:04:57,240 --> 01:04:59,800
Speaker 1: are you talking about? And he was like, um, wait,

1274
01:04:59,800 --> 01:05:01,320
Speaker 1: what what do you mean? I go it was like

1275
01:05:01,360 --> 01:05:03,800
Speaker 1: about Sarah Palin. He goes, they've posted that, and I

1276
01:05:03,920 --> 01:05:06,280
Speaker 1: was like, what do you Yeah, she said, there's always

1277
01:05:06,280 --> 01:05:07,840
Speaker 1: like group of guys in the back of the room

1278
01:05:07,880 --> 01:05:11,360
Speaker 1: that are like, she's cool. And he goes and then

1279
01:05:11,360 --> 01:05:13,040
Speaker 1: it stopped and I was like, yeah, and he goes,

1280
01:05:13,760 --> 01:05:18,480
Speaker 1: Oh well, um, it didn't stop there. She went on

1281
01:05:18,560 --> 01:05:22,400
Speaker 1: to say, in other words, Nicky Glazer is the Sarah

1282
01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:24,760
Speaker 1: Palin of stand up comedy to a room of people,

1283
01:05:24,800 --> 01:05:27,480
Speaker 1: by the way, that are not only my my boyfriend

1284
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:29,840
Speaker 1: at the time, all of my best friends in comedy,

1285
01:05:29,840 --> 01:05:31,919
Speaker 1: which are like all my best friends in a room

1286
01:05:31,960 --> 01:05:34,040
Speaker 1: of people in St. Louis that don't know who I am.

1287
01:05:34,080 --> 01:05:37,040
Speaker 1: I wasn't a household name or even a name. So

1288
01:05:37,080 --> 01:05:39,640
Speaker 1: she was just saying that just to create an air

1289
01:05:39,680 --> 01:05:41,640
Speaker 1: of hating and to say that I was the Sarah.

1290
01:05:41,760 --> 01:05:45,960
Speaker 1: Like to Sam, Sarah Palin was like the worst Donald

1291
01:05:46,960 --> 01:05:48,880
Speaker 1: And he was like, and I go, why didn't you

1292
01:05:49,040 --> 01:05:51,320
Speaker 1: fucking tell me? And it's because this woman caused so

1293
01:05:51,360 --> 01:05:54,760
Speaker 1: much fear out of everyone, like like I probably wouldn't

1294
01:05:54,800 --> 01:05:58,240
Speaker 1: have defended myself. After she did that, I was like,

1295
01:05:58,360 --> 01:06:01,720
Speaker 1: it's war. So then I used to go, I know

1296
01:06:01,800 --> 01:06:03,480
Speaker 1: this is so long a word. No, no no, no, I

1297
01:06:03,480 --> 01:06:05,480
Speaker 1: think this is great and I want to know more

1298
01:06:05,520 --> 01:06:08,439
Speaker 1: about it. I want to know more about Louis because

1299
01:06:08,440 --> 01:06:11,360
Speaker 1: I never asked you. Oh my god, I think day

1300
01:06:11,360 --> 01:06:14,920
Speaker 1: about what this girl did, like you could hear. I mean,

1301
01:06:15,200 --> 01:06:16,800
Speaker 1: I'm going to save it for my book. There are

1302
01:06:16,840 --> 01:06:19,160
Speaker 1: countless stories of what this woman did to me, but

1303
01:06:19,240 --> 01:06:21,080
Speaker 1: I'll just get to the awkward part. So I came

1304
01:06:21,120 --> 01:06:23,000
Speaker 1: back to St. Louis and I'm there for a while.

1305
01:06:23,080 --> 01:06:26,360
Speaker 1: I suddenly like get a little bit of a like, okay,

1306
01:06:26,480 --> 01:06:28,720
Speaker 1: a little bit of confidence, but it's still shaky around her.

1307
01:06:28,760 --> 01:06:30,680
Speaker 1: And I'm going to an open mic one night and

1308
01:06:30,720 --> 01:06:32,880
Speaker 1: I'm feeling like I get a letter in the mail

1309
01:06:33,160 --> 01:06:35,640
Speaker 1: right before open mic. I go to my parents mailbox

1310
01:06:35,680 --> 01:06:40,120
Speaker 1: and it is telling me I have um HPV. It's

1311
01:06:40,120 --> 01:06:42,800
Speaker 1: like a letter that says you have abnormal cells and

1312
01:06:42,840 --> 01:06:45,480
Speaker 1: you have HPV, which I like didn't know I had.

1313
01:06:45,520 --> 01:06:48,840
Speaker 1: And at that time I really was kind of like, oh,

1314
01:06:48,880 --> 01:06:50,600
Speaker 1: everyone has. I think I already had a joke about

1315
01:06:50,600 --> 01:06:53,560
Speaker 1: having it. Thought the letter was going to be like

1316
01:06:55,720 --> 01:06:58,920
Speaker 1: the awkward thing. This is the awkward thing. No, no, no,

1317
01:06:58,960 --> 01:07:03,000
Speaker 1: this is not a good this is awkward. So I

1318
01:07:03,040 --> 01:07:04,880
Speaker 1: am a little bit rattled about having HPV. But at

1319
01:07:04,880 --> 01:07:06,680
Speaker 1: the same time, I'm like whatever, but I'm more rattled

1320
01:07:06,720 --> 01:07:08,640
Speaker 1: about performing in front of this girl that night. And

1321
01:07:08,680 --> 01:07:10,440
Speaker 1: I did my set. I did. I always wanted to

1322
01:07:10,480 --> 01:07:12,240
Speaker 1: have new jokes for her so she couldn't say I

1323
01:07:12,280 --> 01:07:14,720
Speaker 1: was like a fucking hack. So I was going up

1324
01:07:15,120 --> 01:07:18,960
Speaker 1: that night and I was just overwhelmed and I started

1325
01:07:19,320 --> 01:07:22,520
Speaker 1: kind of not doing well on my four minutes set

1326
01:07:22,560 --> 01:07:27,640
Speaker 1: whatever it was, and I just go. I found I

1327
01:07:27,640 --> 01:07:30,200
Speaker 1: I just wanted she thought thinks I'm a slut, she

1328
01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:33,919
Speaker 1: thinks I'm not funny. I just wanted to take like

1329
01:07:34,360 --> 01:07:36,880
Speaker 1: for some reason, my brain was like, she's watching you,

1330
01:07:37,000 --> 01:07:40,720
Speaker 1: she hates you. She's going to talk about you, bully

1331
01:07:40,800 --> 01:07:42,800
Speaker 1: yourself right now more than she could ever bully you.

1332
01:07:42,840 --> 01:07:46,560
Speaker 1: And I go, guys, I have HPV. I found out today.

1333
01:07:46,800 --> 01:07:50,480
Speaker 1: I have fucking HPV. I got it as there was

1334
01:07:50,520 --> 01:07:54,600
Speaker 1: no joke. I just wanted to punch myself harder than

1335
01:07:54,680 --> 01:07:57,000
Speaker 1: she in a way that she would be like, I

1336
01:07:57,040 --> 01:07:58,320
Speaker 1: don't even want to make fun of her. That was

1337
01:07:58,320 --> 01:08:00,880
Speaker 1: the saddest thing I've ever seen. I got off stage.

1338
01:08:00,920 --> 01:08:03,760
Speaker 1: I was like shaking. I remember Tommy and Gregg coming

1339
01:08:03,800 --> 01:08:05,040
Speaker 1: up to me being like, are you okay? And I

1340
01:08:05,080 --> 01:08:06,760
Speaker 1: was like I have to I just I want to go.

1341
01:08:06,840 --> 01:08:09,000
Speaker 1: I'm just like so upset, and they took me to

1342
01:08:09,120 --> 01:08:11,480
Speaker 1: Hooters and we had the best nights. But it was

1343
01:08:11,520 --> 01:08:14,120
Speaker 1: so awkward that like in that moment, I didn't even

1344
01:08:14,120 --> 01:08:18,800
Speaker 1: plan on saying that, but that I think it took restaurants. Yeah,

1345
01:08:18,960 --> 01:08:21,920
Speaker 1: being honest, I guess it's just a defense meschanism of

1346
01:08:22,000 --> 01:08:24,640
Speaker 1: feeling like other people are going to be That's my

1347
01:08:24,720 --> 01:08:28,320
Speaker 1: whole life. Yeah, so that was my awkward thing. Let's

1348
01:08:28,320 --> 01:08:30,120
Speaker 1: go into final thought and you share yours. I want

1349
01:08:30,120 --> 01:08:33,800
Speaker 1: to know, like, let's talk about it tomorrow. But I

1350
01:08:34,200 --> 01:08:36,960
Speaker 1: don't think I ever asked you about after coming to St. Louis.

1351
01:08:37,640 --> 01:08:39,800
Speaker 1: How did you rebound from that? Because I think, like

1352
01:08:39,920 --> 01:08:43,320
Speaker 1: that's a great story. Maybe I'll obviously be in your book,

1353
01:08:43,400 --> 01:08:45,519
Speaker 1: but like I never asked you. Also how you got

1354
01:08:45,560 --> 01:08:48,639
Speaker 1: your first half hour on Comedy Central and stuff like that.

1355
01:08:48,680 --> 01:08:50,760
Speaker 1: But I gotta show at MTV and they had to

1356
01:08:50,760 --> 01:08:54,519
Speaker 1: finally acknowledge that I was talent because they did not

1357
01:08:54,640 --> 01:08:57,800
Speaker 1: give me anything. Comedy Cential wouldn't look at me, and

1358
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,439
Speaker 1: sometimes you gotta go elsewhere before they look at you.

1359
01:09:01,520 --> 01:09:05,400
Speaker 1: And then Comedy Central wanted to fucking do everything with me.

1360
01:09:06,120 --> 01:09:07,960
Speaker 1: But they but but they've knew about me for years

1361
01:09:08,000 --> 01:09:09,600
Speaker 1: and years and years. But I was always like the

1362
01:09:09,640 --> 01:09:11,800
Speaker 1: girl that dated Joe da Rosa, that was new on

1363
01:09:11,840 --> 01:09:15,479
Speaker 1: the scene, Like was just you know, Amy's friend, Like

1364
01:09:15,880 --> 01:09:18,880
Speaker 1: you know, people that decide these things are you know,

1365
01:09:19,520 --> 01:09:21,960
Speaker 1: just there at the time. It was like two women

1366
01:09:22,000 --> 01:09:24,120
Speaker 1: that probably I if I were in their shoes too,

1367
01:09:24,120 --> 01:09:25,599
Speaker 1: I would have looked at me and been like, it's

1368
01:09:25,640 --> 01:09:27,800
Speaker 1: just she's doing the same thing Amy's doing. We don't

1369
01:09:27,800 --> 01:09:29,320
Speaker 1: really need it. And they didn't need it, and they

1370
01:09:29,320 --> 01:09:31,920
Speaker 1: were probably right to not put me on TV until

1371
01:09:31,960 --> 01:09:34,639
Speaker 1: and then MTV put me on and then they were like, oh,

1372
01:09:34,680 --> 01:09:36,519
Speaker 1: they were giving away half hours and then I submitted

1373
01:09:36,520 --> 01:09:38,639
Speaker 1: and I was and you know, I had submitted a

1374
01:09:38,640 --> 01:09:41,720
Speaker 1: ton before that for Live at Gotham, you know, any

1375
01:09:41,760 --> 01:09:44,080
Speaker 1: kind of little thing I could get and never even

1376
01:09:44,080 --> 01:09:47,880
Speaker 1: got like a callback. But um, and they'd seen me

1377
01:09:47,920 --> 01:09:54,639
Speaker 1: a lot too. To New York. So I stayed in St.

1378
01:09:54,640 --> 01:09:56,360
Speaker 1: Louis for a year and a half, year and a

1379
01:09:56,400 --> 01:09:58,280
Speaker 1: half when I moved back in two thousand nine. Yeah,

1380
01:09:58,280 --> 01:09:59,400
Speaker 1: and lived with my parents for a year and a

1381
01:09:59,439 --> 01:10:01,320
Speaker 1: half and I moved in two thousand tens. This is

1382
01:10:01,320 --> 01:10:03,479
Speaker 1: the kind of ship that I don't think people realize

1383
01:10:03,520 --> 01:10:07,000
Speaker 1: about you because they see and maybe even myself, I

1384
01:10:07,360 --> 01:10:09,680
Speaker 1: never thought like, oh she just but they see you

1385
01:10:09,680 --> 01:10:13,040
Speaker 1: get Last Comic Standing when you're one, they see you

1386
01:10:13,080 --> 01:10:15,840
Speaker 1: get the Tonight Show, and then for a fucking year

1387
01:10:15,840 --> 01:10:19,920
Speaker 1: and a half, you're back. I got the Tonight Show

1388
01:10:20,080 --> 01:10:23,760
Speaker 1: January twenty nine, lived and moved back April first, two

1389
01:10:23,800 --> 01:10:27,320
Speaker 1: thousand nine. Lived there until July of two thousand so

1390
01:10:27,320 --> 01:10:29,680
Speaker 1: a year and two months. Yeah, and then you go back.

1391
01:10:29,760 --> 01:10:32,679
Speaker 1: Then you go to New York for the first time. Yeah,

1392
01:10:32,840 --> 01:10:34,679
Speaker 1: from two thousand ten until Yeah, how did you feel

1393
01:10:34,680 --> 01:10:36,759
Speaker 1: about the mics there? I mean, luckily you knew Amy

1394
01:10:36,880 --> 01:10:39,280
Speaker 1: a little helped me out a ton, but like, dude,

1395
01:10:40,600 --> 01:10:42,439
Speaker 1: you know what, that's when I first started that. I

1396
01:10:42,439 --> 01:10:44,760
Speaker 1: got a podcast with Sarah Schaeffer that we met at

1397
01:10:44,760 --> 01:10:47,639
Speaker 1: a party and we're just like we literally the story

1398
01:10:47,640 --> 01:10:50,560
Speaker 1: of our Sarah's in two thou when we started that

1399
01:10:50,960 --> 01:10:54,400
Speaker 1: You Had to Be Here podcast. I remember we were

1400
01:10:54,400 --> 01:10:58,879
Speaker 1: at Brian Balden just remember he used to book Montreal

1401
01:10:58,960 --> 01:11:01,400
Speaker 1: and uh he still books comedy. Is a great guy.

1402
01:11:01,520 --> 01:11:04,000
Speaker 1: But we were at his party and we I met

1403
01:11:04,240 --> 01:11:06,160
Speaker 1: I just moved to town and Sarah and I were

1404
01:11:06,680 --> 01:11:09,360
Speaker 1: over this like the chips and hummus eating at this

1405
01:11:09,400 --> 01:11:13,120
Speaker 1: table as probably like starting my nightly bench and and

1406
01:11:13,120 --> 01:11:15,679
Speaker 1: I was still drinking at the time too, and Justin

1407
01:11:15,680 --> 01:11:18,719
Speaker 1: Deiberally came on and we were just like talking about

1408
01:11:18,720 --> 01:11:20,400
Speaker 1: how much we liked him, and she had booked me

1409
01:11:20,439 --> 01:11:22,479
Speaker 1: on some like bar shows she did and we had

1410
01:11:22,760 --> 01:11:24,639
Speaker 1: She wouldn't even there then, and we didn't meet, but

1411
01:11:25,080 --> 01:11:27,559
Speaker 1: we're eating and um, and this was at a time

1412
01:11:27,560 --> 01:11:30,200
Speaker 1: when podcasts. Everyone was like everyone has a podcast. People

1413
01:11:30,200 --> 01:11:31,920
Speaker 1: were saying that back then, because I remember when we go,

1414
01:11:31,960 --> 01:11:34,240
Speaker 1: shall we do a podcast? No, everyone is a fucking

1415
01:11:34,240 --> 01:11:38,439
Speaker 1: podcast two thousand you guys. So if you're saying it now,

1416
01:11:38,680 --> 01:11:41,000
Speaker 1: just get over it. Start your fucking podcast, okay, because

1417
01:11:41,160 --> 01:11:48,840
Speaker 1: everyone's they've been saying it all along. So Mark days

1418
01:11:48,920 --> 01:11:51,080
Speaker 1: where everyone was starting one because of Mark, and so

1419
01:11:51,280 --> 01:11:53,200
Speaker 1: Sarah I was like, I've always wanted to start podcast.

1420
01:11:53,280 --> 01:11:54,760
Speaker 1: I tried to start one when I was back home

1421
01:11:54,760 --> 01:11:56,639
Speaker 1: in St. Louis. I got all the equipment, I spent

1422
01:11:56,800 --> 01:11:59,040
Speaker 1: thousands of like a thousand dollars on equipment, did a

1423
01:11:59,080 --> 01:12:03,040
Speaker 1: couple of test episode and didn't go well. But um,

1424
01:12:03,080 --> 01:12:06,240
Speaker 1: so Sarah and I were just like eating chips and

1425
01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:08,280
Speaker 1: at this party and I was like, I want to

1426
01:12:08,280 --> 01:12:09,719
Speaker 1: start a podcast and she was like I do too,

1427
01:12:09,760 --> 01:12:13,040
Speaker 1: and I was like, who should let's start one together

1428
01:12:13,120 --> 01:12:14,519
Speaker 1: and she was like would you And I was like,

1429
01:12:15,680 --> 01:12:18,280
Speaker 1: uh yeah, and she was like okay, meet me at Rockefeller.

1430
01:12:18,400 --> 01:12:20,760
Speaker 1: She worked at Jimmy Fallon as a blogger at the

1431
01:12:20,800 --> 01:12:23,360
Speaker 1: time and had won an Emmy from it, and she

1432
01:12:23,520 --> 01:12:26,120
Speaker 1: was like a really go getter. I would have never

1433
01:12:26,160 --> 01:12:29,160
Speaker 1: gotten into podcasting had someone not been like, Okay, I'll

1434
01:12:29,200 --> 01:12:31,559
Speaker 1: I'll fucking run it for us. You just show up

1435
01:12:32,479 --> 01:12:34,439
Speaker 1: and um. And so that's how that. And then once

1436
01:12:34,520 --> 01:12:36,400
Speaker 1: I started podcast that we got in the New York

1437
01:12:36,439 --> 01:12:39,599
Speaker 1: Times and then it just caught on big because we

1438
01:12:39,680 --> 01:12:42,080
Speaker 1: had a really interesting concept and it got a lot

1439
01:12:42,080 --> 01:12:44,960
Speaker 1: of press. And then that was like, Okay, I'm doing

1440
01:12:45,000 --> 01:12:47,400
Speaker 1: my own things, separate from anything Amy's getting me. And

1441
01:12:47,400 --> 01:12:50,120
Speaker 1: then you know, my stand up obviously developed on stuff

1442
01:12:50,120 --> 01:12:52,160
Speaker 1: like that. But yeah, it was that podcast really then,

1443
01:12:53,200 --> 01:12:55,400
Speaker 1: and we got a viral video for Justin timber Lake.

1444
01:12:55,439 --> 01:12:57,360
Speaker 1: We said, come back to music, Justin because he hadn't

1445
01:12:57,360 --> 01:13:00,920
Speaker 1: done music for like eight years, and we did this

1446
01:13:01,040 --> 01:13:05,240
Speaker 1: really um sad, can I play it we we went

1447
01:13:05,400 --> 01:13:08,080
Speaker 1: viral on YouTube. Yeah, here's the video that we made

1448
01:13:08,200 --> 01:13:10,840
Speaker 1: for Justin Make Music Again. And this was our first

1449
01:13:10,840 --> 01:13:12,679
Speaker 1: conversation we had and after we were doing the podcast

1450
01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:14,360
Speaker 1: for a while, Sarah was like, I want to do

1451
01:13:14,439 --> 01:13:16,640
Speaker 1: a video. It's black and white. It's like a p

1452
01:13:16,840 --> 01:13:18,840
Speaker 1: s A almost, with a bunch of comics that you'll

1453
01:13:18,840 --> 01:13:22,400
Speaker 1: recognize in it, talking about Justin Making Music Again. It's

1454
01:13:22,439 --> 01:13:23,880
Speaker 1: three minutes long. I'm not gonna play the whole thing,

1455
01:13:23,880 --> 01:13:28,800
Speaker 1: but it's called Justin Timberlake Make Music Again. Two thousand six.

1456
01:13:29,240 --> 01:13:32,080
Speaker 1: It wasn't so long ago, but things were so different.

1457
01:13:32,160 --> 01:13:35,280
Speaker 1: George W. Bush was president, Pluto was still a planet.

1458
01:13:35,360 --> 01:13:38,280
Speaker 1: The National borga Dream was at six, and I pretended

1459
01:13:38,320 --> 01:13:40,960
Speaker 1: to know what that meant. But most importantly, in case

1460
01:13:41,000 --> 01:13:45,280
Speaker 1: you forgot, Justin Timberlake released Future Sex, Love Sounds. And

1461
01:13:45,320 --> 01:13:48,400
Speaker 1: that was the last time Justin Timberlake released an album.

1462
01:13:48,439 --> 01:13:53,240
Speaker 1: Five years. Five years. Every day without a new Justin

1463
01:13:53,280 --> 01:13:58,160
Speaker 1: Timberlake album feels like an eternity, feels pointless, hopeless. I'm sexy,

1464
01:13:58,520 --> 01:14:00,519
Speaker 1: I have no way of telling the girl and cheated

1465
01:14:00,560 --> 01:14:02,720
Speaker 1: on me. How I feel. I can't dance up in

1466
01:14:02,760 --> 01:14:06,559
Speaker 1: the club because I can't even say duck club. I

1467
01:14:06,640 --> 01:14:10,559
Speaker 1: have to say the club because I'm white. How am

1468
01:14:10,600 --> 01:14:14,120
Speaker 1: I supposed to feel tingling right down there? Down there?

1469
01:14:14,600 --> 01:14:17,280
Speaker 1: I haven't had an orgasm in three years. I don't

1470
01:14:17,320 --> 01:14:20,439
Speaker 1: know how to pleasure myself to mars, I've never had

1471
01:14:20,479 --> 01:14:26,040
Speaker 1: an orgasm. Children are dying, probably, and who do we blame?

1472
01:14:26,200 --> 01:14:31,400
Speaker 1: Justin ds? Mila Kuntis? Was it my mother that whore?

1473
01:14:32,000 --> 01:14:34,519
Speaker 1: Justin Bieber is too young for me to jerk off?

1474
01:14:34,560 --> 01:14:37,880
Speaker 1: To speak for yourself, Justin, it feels like you're cheating

1475
01:14:37,920 --> 01:14:40,559
Speaker 1: on us with acting. Lisa hasn't spoken in five Wow.

1476
01:14:40,600 --> 01:14:44,080
Speaker 1: I remember that time you showed the world Janet Jackson's titty.

1477
01:14:44,240 --> 01:14:46,880
Speaker 1: That was awesome? Do that again? She thought she was

1478
01:14:46,960 --> 01:14:49,720
Speaker 1: hearing that a new Justin's who were Lays single, but

1479
01:14:49,800 --> 01:14:52,320
Speaker 1: in fact he was attaining sample. Sure, you've performed a

1480
01:14:52,320 --> 01:14:55,160
Speaker 1: few new songs in your barbecue joint. I don't give

1481
01:14:55,240 --> 01:14:59,000
Speaker 1: a fuck. Someone had made a Hungarian techno remix of

1482
01:14:59,040 --> 01:15:01,599
Speaker 1: Sexy Back, and she wasn't able to turn it off

1483
01:15:01,600 --> 01:15:04,800
Speaker 1: in time to hear the whole song. Michael Jordan thought

1484
01:15:04,800 --> 01:15:07,040
Speaker 1: it was a good idea to play baseball. Remember how

1485
01:15:07,080 --> 01:15:10,400
Speaker 1: that turned out? Real shitty the effects on the brain

1486
01:15:10,439 --> 01:15:17,880
Speaker 1: have been a it's too long catastrophic. Justin. Actually, you're funny,

1487
01:15:18,040 --> 01:15:22,600
Speaker 1: you're charming, but but, but but the sexy is no

1488
01:15:22,680 --> 01:15:26,200
Speaker 1: longer back. The sexy is gone. You brought sexy front,

1489
01:15:26,560 --> 01:15:29,639
Speaker 1: and what goes around comes all the way back around.

1490
01:15:29,840 --> 01:15:34,120
Speaker 1: Because that's how science works, my friend. You can never

1491
01:15:34,160 --> 01:15:37,680
Speaker 1: bring sexy back back. I was about to have a threesome, like.

1492
01:15:37,840 --> 01:15:40,559
Speaker 1: I had gotten both of them in the room, and

1493
01:15:40,600 --> 01:15:42,720
Speaker 1: I thought, just get a little music on and I

1494
01:15:42,760 --> 01:15:45,719
Speaker 1: put my love on and they both started crying, where's

1495
01:15:45,720 --> 01:15:50,080
Speaker 1: the sex thing? Get the sex thing? And that's your fault, justin,

1496
01:15:50,560 --> 01:15:53,559
Speaker 1: I'll cheat on you. Well one did it, and I'll

1497
01:15:53,640 --> 01:15:56,599
Speaker 1: cheat that out you. I did all the groundwork and

1498
01:15:56,720 --> 01:16:05,839
Speaker 1: you fucked me. Why it's like a minute, pis Carmen.

1499
01:16:07,479 --> 01:16:12,320
Speaker 1: She's who was giving me this way. It was gonna

1500
01:16:12,360 --> 01:16:18,880
Speaker 1: have a freeze. Please please, please, please do what you

1501
01:16:18,920 --> 01:16:21,280
Speaker 1: were born to do, Do what you were forced to

1502
01:16:21,320 --> 01:16:24,240
Speaker 1: do at a young age. You can do this. Just

1503
01:16:24,400 --> 01:16:29,680
Speaker 1: do it before you get old. Sing justin, sing please, justin, Timberlake,

1504
01:16:30,120 --> 01:16:35,840
Speaker 1: make music again. So he'd retweeted it, and then we

1505
01:16:36,320 --> 01:16:39,080
Speaker 1: got it blew up, and then MTV gave us a

1506
01:16:39,080 --> 01:16:42,160
Speaker 1: show because of that video. That was all Sarah's idea

1507
01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:44,360
Speaker 1: of like, I have this idea, and she sent me

1508
01:16:44,360 --> 01:16:46,640
Speaker 1: a script. I put in some more jokes to it,

1509
01:16:46,680 --> 01:16:48,840
Speaker 1: we shot it, and then that's why you're gonna sell

1510
01:16:48,880 --> 01:16:53,320
Speaker 1: out the Enterprise Arena someday next year. Thanks for listening

1511
01:16:53,320 --> 01:17:00,679
Speaker 1: to the show today, don't we ca? And like what

1512
01:17:01,240 --> 01:17:04,360
Speaker 1: I don't know? I was gonna say, Jack Jackson tiber Lake,

1513
01:17:05,720 --> 01:17:07,640
Speaker 1: but I just like got caught up in what you

1514
01:17:07,680 --> 01:17:10,600
Speaker 1: were saying. I did Jacqueline Kennedy, Oh, I don't know.

1515
01:17:11,000 --> 01:17:14,080
Speaker 1: Someone I sounded like I had a stroke. Who probably did? Yeah,

1516
01:17:14,120 --> 01:17:15,120
Speaker 1: Jacqueline Kennedy, Jack