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Speaker 1: Yes, Yes, I am Dramos and this is the Street

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Speaker 1: Stoic Podcast, bringing your daily dose a timeless stoke philosophy,

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Speaker 1: a remix for the hip hop generation. Now, with that

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Speaker 1: in mind, let's get things started with your daily shot

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Speaker 1: of inspiration. Now today we are going to be focusing

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Speaker 1: around the stoic idea of practicing resilience when faced with obstacles, failure,

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Speaker 1: or tragedy. And we're gonna gonna pull some some lyrics

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Speaker 1: from someone who you're gonna be hearing a lot from

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Speaker 1: this season on this show in general, J Cole and

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Speaker 1: the track love Yours in the record Call says it's

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Speaker 1: beauty and the struggle, ugliness and the success. Hear my

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Speaker 1: words and listen to my signal of distress. I grew

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Speaker 1: up in the city and know sometimes we had less

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Speaker 1: compared to some others down the block. We were blessed.

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Speaker 1: And to me, what he's speaking about on this record

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Speaker 1: is really the idea of there are two sides to everything. Right,

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Speaker 1: there's always good and bad at everything, and that actually

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Speaker 1: makes nothing inherently good or bad. It's all about the

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Speaker 1: perspective that you end up taking. Right. Of course, there

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Speaker 1: are moments and there are times where tragedy happens. We

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Speaker 1: lose a loved one, we get let go from our job,

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Speaker 1: you know, we get injured, and in some sort of way, right,

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Speaker 1: we're incapacitated. We can't do the things that we normally

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Speaker 1: would do. But on the flip side of that, there

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Speaker 1: is always going to be something positive that you can

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Speaker 1: embrace in that moment. Right, everything has two sides to it.

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Speaker 1: Nothing is just in inherently bad or inherently good. Everything

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Speaker 1: just is at the end of the day, right, And

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Speaker 1: this leads perfectly into a quote from one of the

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Speaker 1: stoics Epitetis, where he says people are not disturbed by things,

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Speaker 1: but by the views they take on them. So we're

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Speaker 1: not inherently affected by our environment or by certain situations,

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Speaker 1: or by the things that people say. But instead, what

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Speaker 1: ends up bothering us or causing us harm or distress

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Speaker 1: is the way that we decide to look at them

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Speaker 1: or look at that situation. Right. It's this idea that

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Speaker 1: when you can begin to see the good in everything

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Speaker 1: that happens, right, even if it seems like, oh man,

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Speaker 1: this is just a horrible, terrible situation, when you can

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Speaker 1: find the good in it, it begins to have less power,

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Speaker 1: and in fact, it may not have any power over

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Speaker 1: you whatsoever. Right, And for me, I relate to this

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Speaker 1: so much, particularly as of late, and I think this

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Speaker 1: was sort of my process and even getting back into

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Speaker 1: this falac, right, and why it sort of hit me

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Speaker 1: so hard that I felt like I had to share it.

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Speaker 1: But you know, recently, I've kind of was going through

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Speaker 1: a breakup of sorts, you know what I mean, the

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Speaker 1: ending of a situation, and I thought it was someone

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Speaker 1: that had a lot of potential for a long term relationship, right,

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Speaker 1: for potentially being somebody that I could start a family

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Speaker 1: with and start the next chapter of my life with,

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Speaker 1: you know. And as time went on, we realized that,

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Speaker 1: you know, we just kind of weren't on the same

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Speaker 1: page in this moment right now, and it was best

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Speaker 1: to sort of take a break from another and kind

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Speaker 1: of put that distance, you know. And on one side

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Speaker 1: of that, I can be frustrated, right, I can be disappointed,

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Speaker 1: because of course, you know, you are are thinking about

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Speaker 1: the long term implications of this possible relationship, right, and

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Speaker 1: what does that mean for your life? And you've invested

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Speaker 1: time into it, You've shared a lot with this person

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Speaker 1: or on the flip side of it, right, this is

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Speaker 1: what I've begun to adapt that that really has has

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Speaker 1: resident for me. Is I could also think back to

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Speaker 1: the time that we spent together and be honest and

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Speaker 1: say I genuinely was happy and had a great time

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Speaker 1: with that person, you know, for however long it ended

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Speaker 1: up lasting, right, Like I kind of liken it too

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Speaker 1: a vacation, right, like you know, the think about the

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Speaker 1: greatest vacation you've ever had, Right, And of course at

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Speaker 1: some point that vacation has to end, and maybe we

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Speaker 1: wish it was longer. Maybe we wish you got to

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Speaker 1: see a couple couple more things, right, and maybe even

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Speaker 1: the vacation itself, as great as it was, of course,

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Speaker 1: it wasn't perfect. Maybe there was a dinner that wasn't

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Speaker 1: as good as we hoped it would be. We had

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Speaker 1: a bad experience at the airport, whatever it might have been.

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Speaker 1: All of those things, obviously we can look at them

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Speaker 1: as negatives. But most of us, when reflecting back on

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Speaker 1: something like having had a great vacation, we're not harping

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Speaker 1: on the negative aspects of it, right, No, we are

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Speaker 1: reminiscing and we are savoring all of the positive and

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Speaker 1: good moments that we shared on that vacation. And I

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Speaker 1: think that's what we have to kind of look at

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Speaker 1: when we're talking about loss, be it a breakup or

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Speaker 1: even you know which is more difficult, but even the

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Speaker 1: loss of someone we love, you know, the idea of

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Speaker 1: course that them no longer being a part of our

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Speaker 1: everyday lives like there is suffering and that there is

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Speaker 1: pain in that. But at the same time, we should

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Speaker 1: have gratitude for the happy moments, the love that we

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Speaker 1: shared between each other, you know, the time spent together,

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Speaker 1: whatever it might be like. You can look back on

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Speaker 1: those things, be grateful for the situation, even if you

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Speaker 1: wish things would have panned out just a bit differently. Right,

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Speaker 1: We have heard a bit about j Cole's thoughts on

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Speaker 1: the idea of resilience by practicing gratitude essentially right and

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Speaker 1: by seeing things from multiple sides. We've heard from one

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Speaker 1: of the stoics, Epictetius. Now let's talk about you and

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Speaker 1: how you can make it your mantra for today. But

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Speaker 1: first let's take a quick break and then we'll be

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Speaker 1: right back. All right, So we are focusing on the

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Speaker 1: idea of practicing resilience right. And I think for me,

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Speaker 1: it's recognizing the fact that unplanned obstacles or disappointments are inevitable. Right.

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Speaker 1: But you can apply this concept and make it your

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Speaker 1: mantra for today by trying to put forth the effort

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Speaker 1: to develop the muscle, right, the mental muscle that will

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Speaker 1: help you automatically start viewing each situation from the other side, right,

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Speaker 1: the other perspective, right, the one that allows you to

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Speaker 1: have potential gratitude or at the very least allows you

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Speaker 1: to sort of take some of that weight off your shoulders. Right. Again,

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Speaker 1: it's not diminishing the pain, or it's not ignoring it

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Speaker 1: or acting like it doesn't exist. Right. Certain things that

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Speaker 1: we're talking about have you know, real loss to them,

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Speaker 1: especially in the literal sense when we're talking about losing

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Speaker 1: a loved one or losing a job. But at the

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Speaker 1: same time, again, the fact that we're feeling some sort

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Speaker 1: of pain must mean that there was also some sort

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Speaker 1: of happiness. There was a good part of that as

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Speaker 1: well that has now created this sort of emotional attachment. Right.

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Speaker 1: And it's about training your mind to not bury down

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Speaker 1: the pain that you're feeling, right, focus on that and

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Speaker 1: work through it. But instead of harping on that and

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Speaker 1: sort of just viewing the situation as one thing as

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Speaker 1: negative as terrible, understanding that on the other side of

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Speaker 1: that pain is happiness is a positive experience, right, or

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Speaker 1: else you wouldn't be feeling the way that you're feeling

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Speaker 1: right now. So to recap all that we've been talking

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Speaker 1: about today, we've heard the words of Ja Cole, and

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Speaker 1: the part that sticks out to me is him talking about,

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Speaker 1: you know, growing up in a city, knowing sometimes we

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Speaker 1: had less, but compared to some others down the block, man,

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Speaker 1: we were blessed. Right, understanding that even if they don't

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Speaker 1: have all that they hoped, they would finding gratitude and

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Speaker 1: happiness in the fact that they have something that others

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Speaker 1: are striving for, right that they have more than others do.

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Speaker 1: Right that, right there is the exact perspective that we're

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Speaker 1: talking about, and that helps you develop that muscle of resilience,

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Speaker 1: understanding that there's good in every single situation, no matter

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Speaker 1: how negative it feels in the moment. And then epictetius,

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Speaker 1: you know, talking about the fact that we are only

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Speaker 1: disturbed by the views that we take on things. Right,

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Speaker 1: So our reaction, our advantage point that we decide to

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Speaker 1: view a situation from that is the thing that truly

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Speaker 1: affects us at the end of the day. And talking

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Speaker 1: about you know, my story, there's disappointment in a relationship

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Speaker 1: ending and not you know, sort of working out or

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Speaker 1: coming to fruition in the way that I would have

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Speaker 1: hoped it would. But rather than sitting here in that

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Speaker 1: frustration or you know, creating some sort of narrative that

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Speaker 1: allows me to be angry at that other person also

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Speaker 1: being grateful for that person, right, instead choosing to be

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Speaker 1: grateful for the fact that I got to have that

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Speaker 1: time period where I experienced genuine happiness with another person

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Speaker 1: and connection, right, and again letting that be a precursor

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Speaker 1: to knowing that that does exist out there, and it's

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Speaker 1: potentially going to be out there, you know, sooner rather

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Speaker 1: than later for me. Right. So again, it's all about

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Speaker 1: the perspective that you choose to take on with you

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Speaker 1: and taking on that more positive perspective, understanding that there

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Speaker 1: is good in every situation. It is not going to

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Speaker 1: you know, erase all the pain, but at the very

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Speaker 1: least it will remove some of that weight from your shoulders.

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Speaker 1: And allow you to recognize that life is neither inherently

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Speaker 1: bad nor good. It just is and there are two

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Speaker 1: sides to every single situation you find yourself in. You

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Speaker 1: just have to be mindful enough to see it from

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Speaker 1: the other side of the street. Now, with that said,

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for tuning into today's episode. Do

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Speaker 1: your best to apply these concepts that we've discussed in

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Speaker 1: today's show. Go into your everyday life, and I'll catch

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Speaker 1: you next time. The Street Stove podcast is a production

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Speaker 1: of Iheart's Micola podcast network.