Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heeart Radio podcast.
Speaker 2: This week's Thursday Therapy, we've got Vivian two. So she
Speaker 2: has a new book coming out. It's called Rich af
Speaker 2: The Winning Money Mindset that will Change your Life. I
Speaker 2: know we've had a lot of money people on here,
Speaker 2: but I have a feeling she's going to have a
Speaker 2: whole new twist on it. So you can pre order
Speaker 2: as available now. It's going to be released December twenty sixth,
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three. So she is basically a mentor. She
Speaker 2: gives no Bs advice on how to think like a
Speaker 2: rich person and create smart money habits. So let's all
Speaker 2: think rich and get her on. Hey girl, Hey, I'm Jana.
Speaker 1: It's so nice to meet you.
Speaker 3: Janna, It's so nice to meet you too.
Speaker 2: I'm excited to have you on on this week's Thursday
Speaker 2: Therapy because for me, honestly money, I've talked about it
Speaker 2: a lot, and I know people on this one are like,
Speaker 2: all right, you know, another money person, but I'm like, no, Like,
Speaker 2: I love what you do because you're definitely in more
Speaker 2: of like the gen Z world. You're on TikTok, You're
Speaker 2: doing all that and you know, we've had the older,
Speaker 2: wiser people come on that have been fantastic with you know,
Speaker 2: with their their books and their money. But just reading
Speaker 2: your breakdown to You've got a new book coming out
Speaker 2: called Rich af The Winning Money Mindset that will Change
Speaker 2: your life. And again listeners have heard me say this
Speaker 2: on repeat. I have a very like scarcity mindset of money.
Speaker 2: I didn't grow up with it, and so I just
Speaker 2: I sometimes act as if I'm well, I'm always scared
Speaker 2: of losing it, right, because I'm like, well, maybe it'll
Speaker 2: never come back, And so I just I like kind
Speaker 2: of like hoard at times too. And so when you
Speaker 2: know you were saying basically you know, tips to think rich,
Speaker 2: and I'm like, all right, let's.
Speaker 3: Just go dive deep.
Speaker 2: How like, how do you how do you do that
Speaker 2: when you're also scared of well, I don't know when
Speaker 2: where the money's coming in, when it's going to come in,
Speaker 2: if it's going to come in, and I have to
Speaker 2: pay for this, that like all the things. How do
Speaker 2: you think that when you already feel like you've got
Speaker 2: a pile of you know, rocks on your chest.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think it's two main things. And I'll explain them.
Speaker 1: First and foremost, it's automating your life so that your
Speaker 1: life can take care of you. And two, it's something
Speaker 1: that I had to learn in you know, my early
Speaker 1: twenties as a young woman, and it's that not everyone
Speaker 1: is out to get you, Like just because somebody else
Speaker 1: succeeds does not mean you have lost. So to the
Speaker 1: point of automation, I think things become a lot less
Speaker 1: stressful when you know that you have a parachute or
Speaker 1: an eject button or something just to keep you safe.
Speaker 1: And I think that really starts with having an emergency fund.
Speaker 1: I say this not as someone who's just like theoretically
Speaker 1: talking about an emergency fund, but someone who's had to
Speaker 1: use one. When I was bright eyed and bushy tail,
Speaker 1: it was my second year in New York City. You know,
Speaker 1: everything was going great. I was working on Wall Street.
Speaker 1: Me and my roommate had a great first year living together.
Speaker 1: So we decided to move out of that apartment but
Speaker 1: still together, into a new apartment. I had, you know,
Speaker 1: been dating this new guy. I was just really excited
Speaker 1: about life. And the very first weekend that I was
Speaker 1: in this apartment, I actually wasn't there because I was
Speaker 1: in Chicago. I went to the University of Chicago and
Speaker 1: it was I don't know, it's like not like alumni weekend. Yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe like alumni weekend. And it was a reason why
Speaker 1: a bunch of people were going back to campus, and
Speaker 1: it was I was having so much fun and I
Speaker 1: get this text from my roommate, Hey, when you get
Speaker 1: back into town, we had to like sit down and
Speaker 1: have a conversation. And as a millennial, getting that text,
Speaker 1: let me just go ahead and tell you it ruined
Speaker 1: my weekend because I was anxious the whole time. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, are you mad at me? What's going on?
Speaker 1: And she's like, no, it's nothing like that. She's like,
Speaker 1: come home and we'll talk.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, I can just tell me, like like I
Speaker 2: don't like that, just just tell me, like are we good?
Speaker 3: Like are we good?
Speaker 1: And so I come back and it's like so ominous,
Speaker 1: and I'm like what, Like what's wrong? And she's like,
Speaker 1: so the very first night that I slept in our
Speaker 1: new apartment, you know, she's like, the lights were all off,
Speaker 1: but I was watching a little bit of like Netflix
Speaker 1: on my phone or whatever, and she's like and it
Speaker 1: was around midnight and I got up out of bed
Speaker 1: and I went to the bathroom to go to the bathroom,
Speaker 1: like to use the toilet right before I went to sleep,
Speaker 1: and I flipped on the light and I saw a
Speaker 1: thousand little things scurry away. Yeah, and I am someone
Speaker 1: who like will put a cup over a bug and
Speaker 1: then the bug owns the apartment. Now, like I don't
Speaker 1: know where I have to go live somewhere else. And
Speaker 1: to hear that come out of her mouth, I would
Speaker 1: have rathered her tell me that she hated my guts
Speaker 1: or that we were having a big flight. I was like,
Speaker 1: this is like worst possible case scenario. And as much
Speaker 1: as we tried to fight, we fought the property manager,
Speaker 1: our landlord, everything, we ended up paying two months of
Speaker 1: rent break our lease and that was eight thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: And it's not fair, not at all. But you know what,
Speaker 1: like we were young twenty somethings, both of us were
Speaker 1: working on Wall Street. Neither of us had the hour,
Speaker 1: like the hours, or the time or the energy to
Speaker 1: fight this in small claims court.
Speaker 2: Right then you're going to lose money paying for lawyers,
Speaker 2: so then relate.
Speaker 1: It's it's going to be a wash. So she and
Speaker 1: I decided to eat it. And it was four thousand
Speaker 1: dollars from her, four thousand dollars for me. And that
Speaker 1: was my entire emergency event. And that was a really
Speaker 1: scary moment because I didn't have much more than that.
Speaker 1: And to feel like I had worked an entire year
Speaker 1: on Wall Street, where I'm putting in these fourteen to
Speaker 1: sixteen hour days, to have absolutely nothing to show for
Speaker 1: it three hundred and sixty five days later was a
Speaker 1: gut punch. And so I'll say that that moment sucked,
Speaker 1: but that moment would have sucked ten times more if
Speaker 1: we couldn't afford to break our lease, if we had
Speaker 1: to living in an apartment that was dangerous. There was
Speaker 1: literally like there were literally cockroaches dying in our ice tray,
Speaker 1: so like they were clearly getting into our fridge, into
Speaker 1: our food, into our dishwasher, into our clothes, like everything.
Speaker 1: And it was not only scary and horrible for our
Speaker 1: emotional and mental health, but like physically like that that
Speaker 1: was like an actual like toxicity and like bacterial concern.
Speaker 2: Well you can't sleep too, like you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Like I remember one time when I was in La
Speaker 2: I put my foot into one of my little slide
Speaker 2: on shoes and it was there was a cockroach in there,
Speaker 2: and then I felt, I mean it climbed. I mean
Speaker 2: it's to this day it gives me, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 2: like and I couldn't sleep. And then because I'm like,
Speaker 2: is it going to show up next to my bed?
Speaker 2: Is it gonna you know? Is it gonna come in? Disgusting?
Speaker 1: And when you find one, you know there's a bill
Speaker 1: in the wall. So it's just it was a horrible situation,
Speaker 1: but it's really important to automate your life so that
Speaker 1: you have a parachute that you can jump out of
Speaker 1: the plane and you'll be Okay. Did it suck to
Speaker 1: blow all of my money on breaking a lease of
Speaker 1: a horrible, terrible apartment? Yes? Did I feel an immense
Speaker 1: amount of relief after she and I vacuum sealed our
Speaker 1: clothes into a bag air tight for basically seven days,
Speaker 1: moved into a new apartment and never saw a cockroache again? Yes,
Speaker 1: of course it put me in a much better place.
Speaker 1: And then two, I think something that a lot of
Speaker 1: regular people and particular women struggle with is we're haters
Speaker 1: and you don't have to be an out loud hater
Speaker 1: to be a hater. You don't have to be the
Speaker 1: troll commenting you're ugly on somebody's Instagram post to be
Speaker 1: a hater. It's when you see something good happen for
Speaker 1: someone else and you can't even be happy for them.
Speaker 1: You feel like any sort of good thing happening for
Speaker 1: someone else takes away from the good things that can
Speaker 1: happen to you. That is being a hater. And let
Speaker 1: me tell I was the ultimate hater in my twenties.
Speaker 1: In my early twenties, I will say because one I
Speaker 1: worked in an incredibly competitive environment. There were very few women,
Speaker 1: and any time I would see someone else like buying
Speaker 1: for an opportunity, it felt like, you know, I needed
Speaker 1: to do the same thing, and if I didn't get it,
Speaker 1: like that was bad. Like I think that was a
Speaker 1: creation of my environment. You know. I had to compete
Speaker 1: against two other interns for my full time seat and
Speaker 1: I beat them out for it, and I always felt
Speaker 1: like there was someone coming around the corner, like it
Speaker 1: was just like so scary for me, Like to constantly
Speaker 1: feel like the scarcity mindset. And as I've kind of
Speaker 1: grown up and grown into my own skin one, I
Speaker 1: find that I'm a lot more self assured. And it's
Speaker 1: been proven to me time and time again. Just because
Speaker 1: one door closes doesn't mean that there won't be other
Speaker 1: doors down the road that another window won't open for you.
Speaker 1: And I think that's something that we just like need
Speaker 1: to emotionally train ourselves to understand better, because as the
Speaker 1: child of immigrants, it was really hard to feel that
Speaker 1: way for a very long time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I couldn't imagine that piece of it. I mean,
Speaker 2: I linly, this is not the same at all. I
Speaker 2: single mom, grown up, so it's like, yeah, not having
Speaker 2: like the money. So it's like my mom, you had
Speaker 2: to work a bunch of jobs, and like we couldn't
Speaker 2: do a lot of things we wanted to do because
Speaker 2: and we'd have you know, the I always said, it's
Speaker 2: too even in my twenties, like I'd frozen tiketos every
Speaker 2: day for a year, I'd steal toilet paper from a restaurant.
Speaker 2: Like it's just you know, it's like it's when you
Speaker 2: kind of grow into that. It's like I feel like
Speaker 2: that stayed with me at least in my adulthood. So
Speaker 2: was that immigrant piece too, that does that still make
Speaker 2: you feel that way even now older.
Speaker 1: Percent you know that there's like this research that basically
Speaker 1: shows that your brain after age seven is more of
Speaker 1: like a rock, but before age seven, your brain is
Speaker 1: a sponge. It just that's why it's so much easier
Speaker 1: to learn multiple different languages. And it's not strange to
Speaker 1: see some five year old speaking three different languages, like
Speaker 1: talking to his parents, talking to his grandparents, talking to
Speaker 1: a nanny, talking to the tutor like in a bunch
Speaker 1: of different languages. And it's a lot harder to find
Speaker 1: an adult who can do the same in the same way.
Speaker 1: In the same vein, you develop a lot of your
Speaker 1: money habits young and I grew up the child of
Speaker 1: two my grandparents. I was born on US soil, so
Speaker 1: you know, I've got a blue pass support and I
Speaker 1: think in one way that has given me a lot
Speaker 1: of power and entitlement, but not in the bad way,
Speaker 1: in the way that I feel like I belong here.
Speaker 1: I deserve everything that I have worked hard for. There's
Speaker 1: no one who can take that away from me. I
Speaker 1: deserve to be on the soil. But in the other vein,
Speaker 1: when my parents moved to the US, I was actually,
Speaker 1: you know, I was their first child, their only child,
Speaker 1: and I was basically sent back to China to live
Speaker 1: with my grandparents for two three years before coming back
Speaker 1: to live with my parents because they couldn't afford it.
Speaker 1: They couldn't afford the child care, they could not afford,
Speaker 1: you know, frankly, to clothe or feed me in the
Speaker 1: right way, and they wanted to get their financial footing.
Speaker 1: And so I think, you know, growing up with your
Speaker 1: grandparents is amazing, but I think there is something to
Speaker 1: be said that, Like, I didn't live with my parents
Speaker 1: for the first two years of my life, and I
Speaker 1: think there's also something to be said about growing up
Speaker 1: and feeling other. I would say that I grew up
Speaker 1: at the very beginning I would say lower middle class,
Speaker 1: and by high school I would say upper middle class.
Speaker 1: And I always felt like I needed to keep up
Speaker 1: with my predominantly white peers, and it made me very
Speaker 1: insecure because I would try to wear the same clothes
Speaker 1: and do the same activities, but I wasn't able to
Speaker 1: change the way I looked and because of that, I
Speaker 1: think I used spending money as a way to compensate. So,
Speaker 1: you know, I was that girl who wanted to go
Speaker 1: to the mall every single weekend to get the newest
Speaker 1: T shirt, the newest dress, the new whatever. And the
Speaker 1: biggest fight my mom and I ever got into it
Speaker 1: was over a pair of Abercrombie and Fitch ripped jeans.
Speaker 3: Who you wanted to fit in?
Speaker 1: I wanted to fit in so bad? And I came
Speaker 1: home and my mom saw the receipt in the bag.
Speaker 2: And back then too, like I wasn't alloted shop at
Speaker 2: amercram Base. I mean those are like fifty dollars pants,
Speaker 2: Like are you out of your mind?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I want to say. This was like right around
Speaker 1: like nine, and obviously I was like young. I didn't
Speaker 1: understand it, Like.
Speaker 4: The housing crisis was like happening, and my parents were
Speaker 4: more stressed about how they were going to pay their
Speaker 4: mortgage and like still safe for me to go to
Speaker 4: college than I really understood.
Speaker 1: And I feel grateful that they like kind of held
Speaker 1: that from me for a little bit. But they were
Speaker 1: really honest. They were brutally honest. They were like I
Speaker 1: remember coming home with these jeans and my mom yelling
Speaker 1: at me and being like, you're so irresponsible. You don't
Speaker 1: understand the value of a dollar. And this is when
Speaker 1: I knew I had like messed up. I said, well,
Speaker 1: the girl that I'd gone to the mall with my friend,
Speaker 1: I was like, well, her her parents are cool with
Speaker 1: her buying ripped jeans, and I think that really hurt
Speaker 1: my mom. And she I could see you, like tears
Speaker 1: like welling up in her eyes, and she said to me,
Speaker 1: She's like, well, her dad's a lawyer and we're not millionaires,
Speaker 1: and we can't do what they can for her for you.
Speaker 1: And I think that was like the first real financial
Speaker 1: wake up call where I realized, like, people don't have
Speaker 1: the same finances even if they live in similar neighborhoods,
Speaker 1: a couple miles down the street from each other. And
Speaker 1: I ran up the stairs, slammed my door, you know,
Speaker 1: bawled my eyes out. And that was kind of the
Speaker 1: moment where I feel like I really made the decision.
Speaker 1: I was like, I want to be rich as fuck
Speaker 1: and I never ever want to worry about money ever again.
Speaker 1: I want to be able to buy whatever I want.
Speaker 1: I want to be able to do whatever I want,
Speaker 1: and money can never be a limiting factor. Money can
Speaker 1: never make me cry like this ever again.
Speaker 3: I get it.
Speaker 2: I mean I want that say, and I want that
Speaker 2: piece for my kids, like I never want them to
Speaker 2: have to not have something.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Now I'm going to make them work for it,
Speaker 2: like I have already my plan. I'm like, I'm not
Speaker 2: buying you a car. You will work for your car,
Speaker 2: and then I'm going to show you the reward at
Speaker 2: the end of it, which is what my grandpa did
Speaker 2: for my brother. And I love that because it showed
Speaker 2: work ethic. But it also shows that like if you,
Speaker 2: you know, pay your bills on time, like there is
Speaker 2: a you get, you get a little bonus.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 3: I'm curious.
Speaker 2: So in your journey to getting you know, and like
Speaker 2: you said in your book, like rich af like what
Speaker 2: is it?
Speaker 3: Is it for you? Like what's the big thing?
Speaker 1: Is it?
Speaker 3: Investing? Is it? Like? Is it all?
Speaker 2: Is it?
Speaker 3: Mindset? Like what what? What are the main points like
Speaker 3: to get there?
Speaker 1: Yeah? What I do in the book is basically show
Speaker 1: you how rich people think. Because it's not enough for
Speaker 1: me to sit here and say you should budget, you
Speaker 1: shouldn't negotiate for a raise, you should save, you should invest.
Speaker 1: You heard it a thousand times and if you still
Speaker 1: haven't done it, there's a reason why, because you don't
Speaker 1: understand why you need to be doing these things. And
Speaker 1: what is so important for you to understand is the
Speaker 1: mindset behind doing those actions. So I'll give a great example.
Speaker 1: One of my favorites is that we think rich people
Speaker 1: are better than us. We think they're smarter, that they
Speaker 1: work harder, they're bigger, taller, stronger, better, and they're not.
Speaker 1: I'm here to tell you rich people are lazier than
Speaker 1: you and I. They are so much lazier. And you're
Speaker 1: probably thinking, like, that's not true. The guy I saw
Speaker 1: on the cover of Time magazine, he works so hard
Speaker 1: he owns his own company. Like, great, good for you.
Speaker 1: But I'm telling you, first and foremost, no, rich people
Speaker 1: understand the value of labor and they are willing to
Speaker 1: work hard to an extent. But they also recognize that
Speaker 1: you have a human I have a human body. There
Speaker 1: are only so many hours in a day that you
Speaker 1: can work before your body gives out. You have a
Speaker 1: human brain. I have a human brain. There are only
Speaker 1: so many hours a day that your brain can be
Speaker 1: actively functioning and function well. You know what can work
Speaker 1: twenty four to seven, doesn't need to go to the bathroom,
Speaker 1: doesn't need to take a lunch break, doesn't need to
Speaker 1: put on their makeup in the morning, doesn't need to
Speaker 1: commute to and fro your money, Your money can work
Speaker 1: hard for you twenty four to seven. I would say
Speaker 1: your brain and your body. You get about fourteen to
Speaker 1: sixteen hours a day. You'll be burnt out within six
Speaker 1: to twelve months. And there are certainly people who work
Speaker 1: an entire lifetime working like that. There are certainly people
Speaker 1: who don't do that. But if you can make your
Speaker 1: money your partner, your two household income when you're single,
Speaker 1: they are your partner, your money can help you get
Speaker 1: to every single goal you have faster than you can
Speaker 1: do it alone.
Speaker 3: So give us an example. How do we do that?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so, I think you know, when you're talking about investing,
Speaker 1: people think it's de trading. They're like, Okay, I gotta
Speaker 1: put in tons of hours and research and I gotta
Speaker 1: buy like eighteen monitors and then I'm gonna pick the
Speaker 1: perfect stock and it's gonna go up and everything's gonna
Speaker 1: be amazing. Let me tell you, eighty five percent of
Speaker 1: day traders lose money over a past a year. Over
Speaker 1: a long term period, those stats are not good for you.
Speaker 1: And as someone who has worked on Wall Street, I
Speaker 1: saw hedge funds blow up and they weren't even day trading,
Speaker 1: they were just making investment choices. I saw them blow
Speaker 1: up all the time. What I recommend for the average
Speaker 1: Joshmo who has maybe thirty minutes this weekend, maybe an
Speaker 1: hour every month to dedicate to investing, open up a
Speaker 1: tax advantaged investment account. So maybe that is a roth
Speaker 1: IRA or a traditional IRA. Maybe you already have one
Speaker 1: through your employer, like a four to oh one K
Speaker 1: or even just like an individual brokerage account. You're not
Speaker 1: going to necessarily get any immediate tax benefits, but again,
Speaker 1: you pay fewer taxes on investments than you ever would
Speaker 1: on ordinary income as long as you are a long
Speaker 1: term investor. And what you can do is then you
Speaker 1: take cash from your checking in savings account, you put
Speaker 1: it into the investment account. And that's the problem. Everybody
Speaker 1: gets to that step. They're like, I'm done, I'm invested.
Speaker 1: I put money into the you know, wrath ira, I'm
Speaker 1: good to go. No you're not. You're not even close
Speaker 1: to good to go. You need to take that money
Speaker 1: in your roth ira and then you need to buy stuff.
Speaker 1: You've never gone to the grocery store and walked around
Speaker 1: with your purse and then come home and then been
Speaker 1: surprised is that there's no food in your fridge. Like
Speaker 1: you have to buy you know, fruit, you have to
Speaker 1: buy veggies, you have to buy meats, cheeses, breads, whatever.
Speaker 1: And you have to do the same thing with your investing.
Speaker 1: So you've got to open the account. It's just like
Speaker 1: a bag. You got to put cash in that bag.
Speaker 1: You got to go to a grocery store, which you
Speaker 1: know is any sort of brokerage that you're comfortable with,
Speaker 1: and then you have to buy investments. And people are like,
Speaker 1: what investments do I buy? I always say, just pick
Speaker 1: an index fund that tracks either the broader market or
Speaker 1: the S and P five hundred and this will be
Speaker 1: an ETF, this will be a ticker like a VOO
Speaker 1: or a VTI. You don't have to pick zillion things.
Speaker 1: These will be diversified because they are baskets of investments.
Speaker 1: Or just pick a target date retirement fund and with
Speaker 1: that you're pretty much done and you just watch it
Speaker 1: over the long term. Because time in the market beats
Speaker 1: timing the market. Every single time, and it's very challenging
Speaker 1: to pick the perfect investment. As long as you are
Speaker 1: investing early and often you'll be in a pretty good
Speaker 1: spot when you're getting close to retirement.
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, that sounds. That sounds it sounds are
Speaker 2: you getting married? I think I saw that or heard that.
Speaker 1: I am getting married next June. Planning a wedding is
Speaker 1: a nightmare.
Speaker 2: So in the middle of it as well, And it's
Speaker 2: one of those things where I think we finally got
Speaker 2: into a place where again we just moved into a
Speaker 2: new house. So for me, it was I just I
Speaker 2: wanted this safe and this home. I've been you know,
Speaker 2: building for the last year. We finally moved in. But
Speaker 2: it's also scary because like interest rates are so high.
Speaker 2: So I'm like I'm really feeling myself like tight grip
Speaker 2: the accounts and not and not spend literally anything. I'm like,
Speaker 2: all right, it's gonna like there's no Christmas presents, but
Speaker 2: I mean there'll be some, but I'm just saying like
Speaker 2: it's like it's just gonna be you know, I'm just
Speaker 2: I'm gripping really really tight now because it's just it's scary, right,
Speaker 2: And so when I'm thinking about the wedding. For me,
Speaker 2: it's like, all right, there's either an X or there's
Speaker 2: this one, or there's an ayre A and B. Right,
Speaker 2: so we're like kind of splitting it in half. And
Speaker 2: to me, I'm like, Okay, we can either just not
Speaker 2: or right now, I'm stressed about money. But next year,
Speaker 2: hopefully there'll be hopefully more that will come in and
Speaker 2: I won't be as stressed and maybe things will change whatever.
Speaker 2: But I don't want to not have something because I'm
Speaker 2: afraid to put the down positive, like the down payment
Speaker 2: on because I think I would regret not having Now
Speaker 2: we've decided that we're not going to do the big
Speaker 2: one and it's just going to be like super small
Speaker 2: and intimate, but it's still going to be a celebration.
Speaker 2: And I think that's where we've come to, where it's like, Okay,
Speaker 2: let's meet in the middle. Let's not just go to
Speaker 2: the courthouse, let's have something. It's just going to be
Speaker 2: really small, but we're not blow you know, we're not
Speaker 2: spending a lot of money. And I think that's where
Speaker 2: we've gotten to. You know, obviously this being you know,
Speaker 2: this isn't our first time for both of us. So
Speaker 2: where are you on, like the kind of the money
Speaker 2: side of things with weddings.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm very much in the same camp as you.
Speaker 1: I don't want to regret it, right, Like, I love
Speaker 1: my fiance. We want to have an amazing wedding. Shockingly enough,
Speaker 1: no one ever believes me when I say this, but like,
Speaker 1: I'm quite a private person and I have a pretty
Speaker 1: tight circle of friends and it's the same five friends
Speaker 1: that I've had since way back in the day. So
Speaker 1: we had initially wanted a really small wedding eighty people,
Speaker 1: and we had set aside, you know, I would say,
Speaker 1: a pretty robust budget for the wedding. We we got
Speaker 1: engaged in Lake Como, and we thought, this is a
Speaker 1: huge mistake by the way. We got engaged in Lake Como,
Speaker 1: so it set this completely unrealistic expectation that I would
Speaker 1: get to be a Disney princess. And then I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, it wouldn't be so fun if we
Speaker 1: got married in Lake Homa, Like as if Lake Homa
Speaker 1: wasn't like one of the most expensive places on earth
Speaker 1: to get married. And the first venue that we saw
Speaker 1: we fell in love with Jane. To take a guess,
Speaker 1: at how much this venue cost?
Speaker 3: Oh man, I mean.
Speaker 2: Just guess just the venue alone, just the venue, babes.
Speaker 2: Let's see, when I was planning Gretzki's helping her plan
Speaker 2: her wedding, was the met was about like one hundred,
Speaker 2: So I'm going to say like one fifty just for
Speaker 2: the venue.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you got it right on. Yeah, they
Speaker 1: they wanted one fifty and I was like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: that is a huge that's like that would be even
Speaker 1: like bath over half of our budget. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I can't spend more than half of our budget.
Speaker 3: On just on the venue.
Speaker 1: The venue.
Speaker 2: And I was like, that's there's no food, there's no flowers,
Speaker 2: you deserve coming, nothing.
Speaker 1: You have that you have a little building and like
Speaker 1: a nice view and that's about it. And I can't
Speaker 1: do that. Like did I want to get married at
Speaker 1: that venue so bad? Yes? Yeah, obviously I just couldn't
Speaker 1: rationalize it. And my fiance and I went back and
Speaker 1: forth and back and forth and we decided better not
Speaker 1: And did it suck in the moment, yes, But did
Speaker 1: we end up finding a similar venue for so much less?
Speaker 1: We've actually locked in on it. We're getting married at
Speaker 1: villa Erba and it's this beautiful like castilee, like you know,
Speaker 1: house covered in ivy type of beat in lake Homo.
Speaker 1: Guess how much this venue was?
Speaker 3: Thirty?
Speaker 1: Okay, literally, you gotta stop stealing my thunder. I'm like
Speaker 1: really walking together.
Speaker 2: But well, I just so in wedding planning motor now,
Speaker 2: so I'm like, okay, like from my searches, you're.
Speaker 1: Too good, and so to compare, and certainly the one
Speaker 1: fifty was for a three day buyout, but like do
Speaker 1: we need that venue for three a? Certainly not. And
Speaker 1: so to compare one fifty versus thirty thirty feels so
Speaker 1: manageable and it is so amazing because now I'm like,
Speaker 1: all right, great, now we have so much more budget
Speaker 1: for the flowers, for the food, for the entertainment, for
Speaker 1: anything else that we want to do. And it really
Speaker 1: does feel like did I have to make a sacrifice?
Speaker 1: Like sure, you can call it that, but I think
Speaker 1: it's just called being mindful with your money and how
Speaker 1: much value are you going to be able to squeeze
Speaker 1: out of a certain decision. The venue is important. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna lie. I wouldn't get married at an ugly venue.
Speaker 1: But Am I going to be spending an arm and
Speaker 1: a leg on flowers? Probably not. Don't really care about flowers.
Speaker 2: Girl, Let's call the win. I like to call that
Speaker 2: one a win. That's just the wine, yeah exactly, Like, yeah, sure,
Speaker 2: I wanted to be married at like freaking Orlando Disney
Speaker 2: World Princess the you know what I mean, Like, I'm like,
Speaker 2: that's that happening, But yeah, that's that's a win.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And then you know, I think it's just really
Speaker 1: prioritizing what matters to you, Like, am I going to
Speaker 1: be spending a lot of flowers? Now? I don't really
Speaker 1: care about flowers. They die, They literally die. Do I
Speaker 1: want to spend as much as humanly possible on food? Yes,
Speaker 1: Because of every single wedding that I've been to, all
Speaker 1: but one of them had horrible food, and the one
Speaker 1: that had the best food, I tell that couple all
Speaker 1: the time, your wedding was the best wedding I've ever
Speaker 1: been to. And it was because they got catering from
Speaker 1: local Brooklyn restaurants that are like impossible to get a
Speaker 1: reservation at. So it literally felt like I was getting
Speaker 1: like secret VIP service to like taste the special pizza
Speaker 1: and the special ice cream and the special pie or whatever.
Speaker 1: And I love food and it really is something that
Speaker 1: brings me a lot of happiness and value, and I
Speaker 1: know it does for my family and friends. So I
Speaker 1: think it's just spending money on things that matter to you.
Speaker 3: I love that.
Speaker 2: Well, I just I'm excited for you. I'm excited for
Speaker 2: your book. Where can our listeners find you and just
Speaker 2: like hear more about everything that you're doing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can find me across social media as your
Speaker 1: rich BFF, and if you are interested in purchasing the book,
Speaker 1: you can go to richaf dot me. Yes, I know
Speaker 1: that you are a manifestation because I'm that kind of girl.
Speaker 1: But I really just like want people to use this
Speaker 1: as a resource to pick it up from page one
Speaker 1: to the very last page and be able to feel
Speaker 1: more financially stable, more financially confident, and empowered to like
Speaker 1: live their best life because money isn't holding them back.
Speaker 2: Sure, absolutely, well, I love that so much. And good
Speaker 2: luck with your wedding. And that's not way to read
Speaker 2: the book. So thanks for coming on, Thank you so much. Okay,
Speaker 2: bye girl, Bye