Speaker 1: Welcome to Reasonably Sadie, a production of The Black Effect
Speaker 1: Podcast Network and I Heart Radio. Making Money Moves featuring
Speaker 1: Earnier Leisure February. Robin and I are entrepreneurs, and you know,
Speaker 1: we always want to encourage especially black women, to get
Speaker 1: out there and invest in yourself and and definitely like
Speaker 1: strive for your dreams. But you need money to do that.
Speaker 1: So what is the best way to like raise capital
Speaker 1: for your business, especially if you're a startup you know
Speaker 1: you're new to just this entrepreneuri game. I mean, there's
Speaker 1: a few different ways you can't go about raising capital.
Speaker 1: You can, you know, raise capital from friends and family. Um,
Speaker 1: you can you know, leverage your credit. You can take
Speaker 1: loans from your fall o one K. Everybody's situation is different.
Speaker 1: What we did personally was we just started a business
Speaker 1: that had low um startup costs, which is a podcast.
Speaker 1: Doesn't mat take a lot of money to start a podcast,
Speaker 1: and we used our personal money. UM. You know, I
Speaker 1: wish I could have had more of an elaborate story
Speaker 1: to tell, but it really wasn't. Um. We just we
Speaker 1: staved up. We have money that we have from you know,
Speaker 1: working our respective careers, and we were still working while
Speaker 1: we were being entrepreneur. That's nothing to people. You don't
Speaker 1: necessarily have to do one or the other, Like you know,
Speaker 1: you can actually still do both at the same time.
Speaker 1: If you have a nine of five job, you can
Speaker 1: keep that note a five job and still be an
Speaker 1: entrepreneur when you get home. And then eventually as your
Speaker 1: business takes off and now it's time to leave your
Speaker 1: nine the five, then you know it's time to leave.
Speaker 1: But in the meantime, use the money from your note
Speaker 1: a five job or whatever kind of job you have
Speaker 1: to help fund your business. So like your job is
Speaker 1: really is the investor is the angel investing in business
Speaker 1: in that in that situation. Other than that, I mean,
Speaker 1: of course, you can try to get bank financing. That's
Speaker 1: gonna be extremely difficult, almost impossible, especially if you're just
Speaker 1: starting out, your black entrepreneur. It's gonna be extremely difficult
Speaker 1: to get money from a bank. So, like I said,
Speaker 1: I mean, most of the time for entrepreneurs, if you're
Speaker 1: just starting now, you're gonna have to either use your
Speaker 1: own personal money, which is money that you saved up
Speaker 1: um or you know, money from like retirement accounts, money
Speaker 1: from friends and family, you can, you know, take money
Speaker 1: from your house. I'm gonna have to stop you. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna to stop you right there. The friends and family,
Speaker 1: that's like sure far away to cause a ruckets at
Speaker 1: Thanksgiving Like no, okay, there's no no friends and family.
Speaker 1: But definitely I believe in investing in yourself, saving money
Speaker 1: and because there's there's nobody that's gonna support you or
Speaker 1: like root for you more than yourself. Right, so I'm
Speaker 1: definitely down with that. Friends and family, I say, no,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, it depends. I mean, if someone comes to me,
Speaker 1: I would say more family than friends. If they come
Speaker 1: to me they have a solid plan, then I'm not.
Speaker 1: I'm I don't. I'm not going to shy away from
Speaker 1: helping them out if I really believe in it, if
Speaker 1: I see if they have a plan, if you know,
Speaker 1: but not someone just says I'm struggling. Can I get
Speaker 1: some money? Like no, I want to know if how
Speaker 1: is this money going to put you in a better
Speaker 1: place permanently, Like I don't want to just give you
Speaker 1: money just to pay your bill and that's it now, Okay,
Speaker 1: do you all loan money? That's a good question. Do
Speaker 1: you all loan money? To people because I have a
Speaker 1: firm stance because I didn't get burnt a couple of times. Yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I ain't loaning nothing so loan would would would imply
Speaker 1: that the money is gonna be paid back? Right, Yes,
Speaker 1: but we all know it's not. Okay, I mean I haven't.
Speaker 1: I haven't um with the intent of expecting it to
Speaker 1: come back. But I have um given money with the
Speaker 1: intent of helping out a situation. Okay, I like that. Okay,
Speaker 1: now I'm gonna let you get back to the well wait,
Speaker 1: well now that right, so wait, now we're going to
Speaker 1: get back to the metaverse. And I but now that
Speaker 1: you talked about business, I want to piggyback on that conversation.
Speaker 1: I hear from a lot of people who, you know,
Speaker 1: they they're working at nine to five and they really
Speaker 1: want to be entrepreneurs. They really want to create multiple
Speaker 1: streams of income and they don't know where to start.
Speaker 1: And you know, my advice to them is, Okay, what
Speaker 1: are you interested in? What can you, you know, find
Speaker 1: to monetize something that you're interested in. But for people
Speaker 1: who really don't think they have some sort of tangible
Speaker 1: item to sell, what avenue would you say for like
Speaker 1: people should look into too, maybe become entrepreneurs, Like I
Speaker 1: know there's so many things, like especially with the vending machines,
Speaker 1: like how like how is that that going for you guys?
Speaker 1: I'll just start with with education because I've had this
Speaker 1: conversation with a none of my colleagues who don't think
Speaker 1: they could be entrepreneurs, And I'm like, the first thing
Speaker 1: you have to do is what's your purpose? Right? And
Speaker 1: that thing was like to help people. I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: you have a skill set that somebody else doesn't have.
Speaker 1: You have a skill set that I don't have. Ill
Speaker 1: use a young lady for example, she her son uh
Speaker 1: is hearing them period and he's advocated for him for
Speaker 1: the past three years, and I told him like, look,
Speaker 1: your level of advocacy everybody doesn't know how to do that.
Speaker 1: You should probably write a book on this, right, And
Speaker 1: her mind was like, wait, I can't do that, And
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, you could, Like you're fighting for this
Speaker 1: every single day. So the first thing I would say
Speaker 1: is look right in front of you. You're you probably
Speaker 1: possess a skill and a purpose that the other person doesn't. Write.
Speaker 1: Another one of my colleagues, she was like, I don't know,
Speaker 1: I need to create more income. I'm like, well, you're
Speaker 1: a great teacher, why don't you create a tutoring service? Right,
Speaker 1: you can do that after school. Like, that's not gonna
Speaker 1: coast you anything. And you're doing what you naturally do.
Speaker 1: You're you're great at you're a teacher. So the problem
Speaker 1: is that people will use like hey, I don't have
Speaker 1: the time for it, when I'm like, well, either you're
Speaker 1: gonna dedicate the time to doing that or you're gonna
Speaker 1: dedicate the next twenty five years to doing this. Right,
Speaker 1: you drop a knowledge, you drop knowledge over there. It's
Speaker 1: just what you you have to choose, right. But everybody,
Speaker 1: I believe that everybody has a purpose. They just haven't
Speaker 1: tapped into it, right or they're overlooking it. A lot
Speaker 1: of times, it's like it's right in front of you. Right.
Speaker 1: So like people ask me now, like hey, Troy, how's
Speaker 1: it feel not to teach anyone? And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: I'm teaching every day. You still teach you. Yeah, you're
Speaker 1: teaching big time. Yeah, I didn't learn about four things today.
Speaker 1: I can't learn about four things you can talk about right, right? No,
Speaker 1: but you are teaching a lot because, like I said,
Speaker 1: I learned about I Um, you know, I learned about
Speaker 1: stocks from you guys. I also learned about things to
Speaker 1: do for my children. One of which, um, I believe
Speaker 1: I learned from you guys was, you know, make them
Speaker 1: your employee. I have a business. So now I've set
Speaker 1: both of my kids up as employees. I pay them,
Speaker 1: you know, just under the threshold so that they're not taxed.
Speaker 1: And you know, it's a tax start off for me.
Speaker 1: They're building, you know, they're they're they're building a little
Speaker 1: nest egg. Um. What I know a lot of people
Speaker 1: want to create generational wealth for their kids. They want
Speaker 1: to set their kids up for success. So what is
Speaker 1: the best advice that you can give to parents to
Speaker 1: help them, Um, set their kids it's up for financial success. Um,
Speaker 1: just start early, start early. Opening an investment account for them.
Speaker 1: You can open up a UTMA and that's like a
Speaker 1: a brokerage account and investment account, but for kids. And
Speaker 1: unte what's that called again? An art month? U t
Speaker 1: ut M A U t M. Do you all have kids? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I have, I have a son, okay U t M
Speaker 1: A Okay, I'm sorry, go ahead, So, UM, that's an
Speaker 1: investment account that you are like pretty much the owner
Speaker 1: that you stole here and you can put money in.
Speaker 1: You can invest in Apple, you can invest in E, T,
Speaker 1: F and H. They don't gain access to that until
Speaker 1: they turn eighteen to the to the an adult, but
Speaker 1: you know that allows money to grow into an account.
Speaker 1: So that's that's one real easy way that you can
Speaker 1: do it. You can do any online account like t
Speaker 1: D and marriage Trade. You can do MARRIW Lynch, any
Speaker 1: any like online brokerage account. You can go in there,
Speaker 1: take a couple of minutes into the information, and then
Speaker 1: you have the account. You can start investing money in UM.
Speaker 1: You can have a five and plan which that allows
Speaker 1: you to put money away for the education. So that's
Speaker 1: the way that you know, parents want to save for college,
Speaker 1: or you want to save for prep school or whatever,
Speaker 1: not just higher education, any form of education you can
Speaker 1: UM saving. The good thing with the plans is that
Speaker 1: the money is tax free as long as you're using
Speaker 1: for education, and depending on what states you live in,
Speaker 1: if you invest in the States file twenty nine planning,
Speaker 1: you get a state tax deduction for the amount of
Speaker 1: money that you put in, So that's beneficial as well,
Speaker 1: so those are two easy ways where you can actually
Speaker 1: go about to start to build some some assets, some
Speaker 1: wealth for your for your your child down the line. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think what you're doing now is great, right, like
Speaker 1: paying them as employees of your business. Right if you
Speaker 1: if your child is seven years old, can you imagine
Speaker 1: if you paid them ten thousand dollars a year to
Speaker 1: their sevent team, right, you're talking about you, they're already
Speaker 1: six figures by the time eight team. And if you
Speaker 1: invest in a CAU studio account. That's why we we'd
Speaker 1: like to talk about starting early, right, So right now
Speaker 1: our kids are playing roadblocks and then using their iPads
Speaker 1: and so these are company is that way invested in
Speaker 1: and put it inside their studio accounts. Now, when we
Speaker 1: talk about whole long term, that's not even enough vision
Speaker 1: and like long term, like I'm seventeen, they're still young, right,
Speaker 1: but that's ten years of equity that they've grown inside
Speaker 1: those companies. And so that's another way. Just look at
Speaker 1: what they're doing now right where they're invest in their time.
Speaker 1: And because kids will tell you what's trending and what's hot, right,
Speaker 1: they'll let you know that's so true. But you know what. So,
Speaker 1: so my father had an UPMA for me, and of
Speaker 1: course once I turned like eighteen and I was had
Speaker 1: access to it, I blew right through it. So good. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so so so the hard part is, yeah, we're gonna
Speaker 1: say for our kids, but we also have to teach
Speaker 1: them and create discipline for them so that they don't
Speaker 1: blow through that money and so that they you know,
Speaker 1: maybe continue to invest it. But that definitely happened to me.
Speaker 1: Like me and my brother, we blew through our So
Speaker 1: this is what not to do. But that's why we
Speaker 1: we we And I've been saying this recently. It was
Speaker 1: like we the term generational wealth is cool, but generation
Speaker 1: generation that could be blown not to saying that that's
Speaker 1: what happened to you, but the term really should be
Speaker 1: sustainable wealth, right, so as they're growing and how do
Speaker 1: they sustain it so that they can't mess this up? Right, Like,
Speaker 1: there's no way we're gonna put the if this was bowling,
Speaker 1: we're putting the bumpers up so that we we we've
Speaker 1: generated the wealth right this generation, and we're gonna teach
Speaker 1: them how to sustain it so that their kids and
Speaker 1: their grandkids will always have this wealth right, because if
Speaker 1: we teach generation, there's no way. I gave the example.
Speaker 1: My dad worked for forty two years. My son is
Speaker 1: eight years old. Since he's been alive, he's only seen
Speaker 1: my dad's on the couch. He's never seen the hard
Speaker 1: work that he had to put in. He's never seen
Speaker 1: those things. And so like, yeah, I can teach you,
Speaker 1: and you can watch me, but the more important thing
Speaker 1: is how to sustain this long term Kicking it with
Speaker 1: the King featuring Carlos King July. So let's get to
Speaker 1: the list really quickly, because I had some questions about
Speaker 1: this list. Now. I was happy that that I made
Speaker 1: it on the list. I was honored because Carlos King
Speaker 1: does not give out accolades easily at all. Okay, we
Speaker 1: know that. So Kyle Richards was not on the list,
Speaker 1: right and that was confusing to me because I feel
Speaker 1: like she's held Beverly Hills together for fourteen seasons or
Speaker 1: have a long naybe, I would agree with you. So
Speaker 1: then why wasn't she on the list? She was not
Speaker 1: on my top ten list right now, when I do
Speaker 1: my top twenty, Kyle would be numbered eleven. I'm done.
Speaker 1: I would be between the love and okay, okay, but
Speaker 1: but I guess the big the bigger question, Carlos is
Speaker 1: you had Danielle stop on the list. No shade to Danielle,
Speaker 1: but Danielle was a housewife for well how many seasons
Speaker 1: at one point too just and for two Whereas it's like,
Speaker 1: if I feel like skin in the game speaks volumes, right,
Speaker 1: Kyle has skinning the game like no other and and
Speaker 1: every season she has a solid season and she keeps
Speaker 1: that show going. So like, how would how would she
Speaker 1: be over how would you overlook her to a Daniel style? Easily?
Speaker 1: Name me one iconic thing that Kyle has done, Mauricio.
Speaker 1: The splits, Carlos, That's what we got. Let's split exactly. No. Look,
Speaker 1: I am a huge Kyle Richard's fan. I think she's
Speaker 1: a great reality star, Kyle Richard's competing against the top ten.
Speaker 1: She doesn't hold a candle to a Daniel style because
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, and I said this
Speaker 1: and and and quote me again, without Dan and Gel
Speaker 1: nothing would have happened in New Jersey housewise, and I
Speaker 1: was there the first two seasons and can say that
Speaker 1: without Danielle the show would be boring and no disrespect
Speaker 1: of Potomic Ladies, but we can also look at a
Speaker 1: show like Potomac and say, without certain people, what would
Speaker 1: be happening. So, because Danielle was on her own and
Speaker 1: Teresa at that time was very safe and sweet, Teresa's
Speaker 1: table flip is courtesy of Danielle, so o Kyle. Although
Speaker 1: Kyle is good at stirring the pot and listen, I
Speaker 1: think Kyl is great, But when it comes to nine Bethany, Ramona, Teresa, Danielle, Giselle, Sara,
Speaker 1: Kim Zosiac, Kyle, Kyle is an iconic, but she definitely
Speaker 1: is a formidable player. Okay. So I heard a rumor
Speaker 1: that that because you worked on Jersey the year at
Speaker 1: the table got flipped, right, Yes, so she didn't really
Speaker 1: flip the table. That was you under the table flipping
Speaker 1: it for her. I heard a rumor that that was
Speaker 1: Carlos under the table, and Teresa took all the credit
Speaker 1: for Carlos flipping that table. So I was under the table,
Speaker 1: handy dang yelled the book that she placed on the table,
Speaker 1: and then you and then you flipped it, and then
Speaker 1: you flipped because you said it's gonna be good. I
Speaker 1: wish I was that. I wish I was a little
Speaker 1: bright genius then, but I was. That was that your
Speaker 1: first housewife show you worked on before? It was that
Speaker 1: before Atlanta? That was after Atlanta? So what's funny? And
Speaker 1: I did Atlanta season one, and and I had a
Speaker 1: break for like two weeks, and then I got a
Speaker 1: phone call about this housewife in New Jersey and I
Speaker 1: decided to do New Jersey. Okay, but you weren't. You
Speaker 1: weren't EP on New Jersey, were you? No? No, no,
Speaker 1: I was in a books underneath the table rabbit. You're
Speaker 1: a field producer. Okay, Oh, let's be clear. Act on
Speaker 1: Atlanta Girls. When I was at EP, honey, I still
Speaker 1: was on my knees doing something to make sure the
Speaker 1: scene was great. So, so where did you start in
Speaker 1: in your producing career? Like how did you get started? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So I went to college and I majored in journalism.
Speaker 1: Because of that, I was afforded these internships. So I
Speaker 1: interned at the View. I entered that MTV. My last
Speaker 1: internship was at BT. A year later, I got a
Speaker 1: job as a p A working on one or six
Speaker 1: and Park and other shows. And then two years after that,
Speaker 1: I got a phone call from a mutual friend who said,
Speaker 1: I have this opportunity in Atlanta to do this reality
Speaker 1: show called Ladies of Hotlanta. You love reality TV? Would
Speaker 1: you be interested? And I was like, child, let me think.
Speaker 1: And because I was like you, I gonna leave New
Speaker 1: York City and go to Atlanta. But I said, you
Speaker 1: know what, I'm a man of faith. Let me do it.
Speaker 1: And it was the best decision of my career because
Speaker 1: the rest is history. Okay, So you didn't start you
Speaker 1: were an EP on season one Atlanta. No, No, I
Speaker 1: wasn't a p until season six of Atlanta, which is
Speaker 1: the highest rated season. And we know because a NIMI
Speaker 1: called Peter a bit. Now I have a question, so, um,
Speaker 1: because we spoke of you and people that have worked
Speaker 1: producers on Potomac who have been very influential in helping
Speaker 1: us get to where we are. Um, However, give me
Speaker 1: an honest answer, Carlos, do you feel like do you
Speaker 1: feel like because you are a man okay and and
Speaker 1: you're a man helping women tell their story, do you
Speaker 1: feel like you can do it better than a woman
Speaker 1: helping women tell their story? Is there is there disconnot
Speaker 1: a disconnect, but you know when women. We know what
Speaker 1: we go through, we feel it. Yeah, so I'm what
Speaker 1: are your thoughts. Yeah, that's a that's a very great question. No,
Speaker 1: I don't think I have a um an edge over
Speaker 1: a woman who's also producer. Um. I think a woman
Speaker 1: who's producing a show that's dominated by women, she has
Speaker 1: to be confident in order to be honest with the
Speaker 1: women and not be intimidated by the woman. And I
Speaker 1: think the reality star who's a woman has to be
Speaker 1: able to feel comfortable sharing your personal business because let's
Speaker 1: just let's just be real. Historically, women don't like to
Speaker 1: tell other women the business period. They just because it's
Speaker 1: one of the things where it's like, girl, I don't
Speaker 1: know you want my man, I don't know you want
Speaker 1: my life. I don't know if there's some single black
Speaker 1: or white female situation. So it takes a minute. So
Speaker 1: when you come to a talented man, Gail straight, there's
Speaker 1: a guard that's led down, right because it's like, well,
Speaker 1: you can't take my man, and if you do, and
Speaker 1: if you can, a whole another issue, right um um.
Speaker 1: And I'm able to at least give you more more
Speaker 1: of me because my guard is now. So I don't
Speaker 1: think that, Um, we do a better job in women,
Speaker 1: not at all. I think women can do a great job.
Speaker 1: And what's funny is be let's talk to Giselle. I
Speaker 1: remember talking to you your first season. I remember you
Speaker 1: had a female Shaw runner and she called me and
Speaker 1: you guys were in the middle of getting a scene together,
Speaker 1: and Giselle said, oh, Carlos, I thought you were gone
Speaker 1: are for this third And I was like, why did
Speaker 1: that come from? That's so funny, I ask you that. Well, I, well,
Speaker 1: I knew that we had the same production company. People
Speaker 1: don't know this, but we have the same production company
Speaker 1: as Atlanta Potoma does, and you were of producers. You're
Speaker 1: the only person that we know their name, right, So
Speaker 1: I just assume that they would in Atlanta was great.
Speaker 1: So I just assumed it they would take whoever they
Speaker 1: were using in Atlanta and give them to us so
Speaker 1: that we could be great. Um. Now I can say
Speaker 1: that the person that you were talking to, she was
Speaker 1: great for us. She gave us the tools. Yeah, she
Speaker 1: gave us the tools that we needed season one, season two.
Speaker 1: I can, Carlos, and be honest, I can still hear
Speaker 1: her in my brain. Um, she has this saying called
Speaker 1: fix your face. And there's so many times where like
Speaker 1: I'm in a scene and that this face is jacked
Speaker 1: all the way up, but I need to fix it.
Speaker 1: And it's not anything that has to it's not anything
Speaker 1: that has to do with the cast. It's what's going
Speaker 1: on in producing like that. You know, sometimes the producing
Speaker 1: of it all could be problematic, and you know, we
Speaker 1: get upset about it, but but she gave us wonderful
Speaker 1: tools to get us to a season. No season, Well
Speaker 1: are we supposed to say that? Okay, fine, we just
Speaker 1: did season show. I want to talk about now. I
Speaker 1: want to talk about you because Carlos, we know we
Speaker 1: might have been in Miami, and Carlos heard we was
Speaker 1: in Miami. And when I say, we me Robin and
Speaker 1: some other ladies, and Carlos said, let me go meet
Speaker 1: the lady days that sound Mike face to face up
Speaker 1: closer and personal. And I totally loved it. Was so
Speaker 1: happy that you did that. I'm sure you're you know,
Speaker 1: you're a really busy guy and you took time out
Speaker 1: to come and meet us and just keep key. I mean,
Speaker 1: we had a good old KEI Kiva Carlos, Yes, no,
Speaker 1: and and listen and I'll say this and I don't care.
Speaker 1: He gets mad. I am a black man in this
Speaker 1: business producing reality TV, and I'm such a fan of
Speaker 1: reality And one thing about me is I support all
Speaker 1: of my black females and males in this genre because
Speaker 1: I know how hard it is to be great in
Speaker 1: front of the camera being judged by the world. So
Speaker 1: Number one, I want to make it very clear, I
Speaker 1: am a fan. Number one, I thank you. I watched
Speaker 1: Potomac and I get my entire life. So when I
Speaker 1: was told that you ladies were well, that you two
Speaker 1: and some other folks were in Miami, I you know,
Speaker 1: I didn't tell you all this. I canceled two meetings
Speaker 1: and I said, and I said, I have to meet them.
Speaker 1: I'm a fan, just like meeting Beyonce. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: I was like, wait, I said, but Carlos, this is
Speaker 1: what you don't know. So after you laughing everything, um,
Speaker 1: Karen comes up to me and she says, at Giselle,
Speaker 1: did you did you get to meet the Carlos? Did
Speaker 1: you did you meet Carlos? I said, yes, bitch, before you, Yes,
Speaker 1: I met Carlos. Okay, he came and saw me first,
Speaker 1: and look and look. Some other people were like, Carlos
Speaker 1: was here. I didn't see Carlos. Yeah, that's probably abolist.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I mean, listen, I love I love
Speaker 1: all of you, ladies, but I will say this, it
Speaker 1: was a pleasure of beating the two of you. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna say who us was in the room because
Speaker 1: I ain't stupid, but I have to say, first of all, guys,
Speaker 1: Gizelee and Robin are gorgeous in person like like no makeup.
Speaker 1: We were in the bed, like when I said to you, guys,
Speaker 1: we had a key. We had a key, key. And
Speaker 1: the beauty of talking to Graizelee and Robin was they're
Speaker 1: such great professionals and they know how to do their
Speaker 1: job and we just had a I don't want to
Speaker 1: spoil it, but we just had a good time talking
Speaker 1: about the show and the scenes and this and just
Speaker 1: reality TV. They threw me shade, you know. It was
Speaker 1: it was, it was, It was fun, and I want
Speaker 1: people to know that at the very end of the day,
Speaker 1: I am a huge fan of Potomac and I say
Speaker 1: this all the time, and I'm not disrespecting my land
Speaker 1: of girls, who I will always loved. But the real
Speaker 1: Hall wots up. Potomac to me is the best Housewise
Speaker 1: out right now. So wait before before you switch topics.
Speaker 1: So when when you were um, when we were in
Speaker 1: the room, you called Giselle executive producer and you called
Speaker 1: me co executive producer. So what are you when you're
Speaker 1: watching Potomac? What are you seeing that makes you think that? Okay,
Speaker 1: So as a student, no, let let me not be
Speaker 1: so humble. As a professor of super Sorry, Dr Wendy,
Speaker 1: I'm the professor tonight. So you're talking about don't do it.
Speaker 1: Don't do it? So luck when I watched the show
Speaker 1: and that and that's the reason why I'm saying what
Speaker 1: I said earlier was the relationship between the producer and
Speaker 1: the cast members crucial because there's a level of trust.
Speaker 1: And when you talked about the female producer, who you
Speaker 1: still here in your ear like fix that face. I
Speaker 1: can't wash Potomac. And one thing about the two of you,
Speaker 1: y'all play off of each other. And I'll give it.
Speaker 1: I'll give an example of two scenes that are I'll
Speaker 1: give three very quickly. I'll give three very quickly. Season one,
Speaker 1: episode one, Jeez, Okay, because I I do this ship
Speaker 1: for real. When Gizelle told Karen, y'all have this argument
Speaker 1: about the crab boils, and it was this whole thing
Speaker 1: in the mirror. I I knew in that instance. I said, Oh, Gizelle,
Speaker 1: it's like this has to be in the first episode.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be a part of anything boring, so
Speaker 1: let me make sure to just be honest. And since
Speaker 1: Karen and are friends in real life, let me read
Speaker 1: her real quick and it won't matter. So that's a
Speaker 1: I'm not suner one. Number two is last season when
Speaker 1: Professor Wendy and the two of you were on the couch.
Speaker 1: You guys were on the cash trip. Um Ashley took
Speaker 1: off maternity leave to be messy and to deliver the
Speaker 1: message to Dr Wendy and y'all to set on the couch.
Speaker 1: Wendy had was fed up to here y'all look on
Speaker 1: the couch and said, girl, I don't really give a ship.
Speaker 1: This was a great scene. I'm going to sip on
Speaker 1: my bottle water with the straw, and Robin said, I'm
Speaker 1: going to literally finger myself as you talk about that.
Speaker 1: I was like, they are good paired and last or
Speaker 1: not leaves last but not least when Ashley and Candice
Speaker 1: had that altercation in candice home and Ashley gave the
Speaker 1: read of girl, you mean your mama high official Mama table,
Speaker 1: which I think is everything and canvas stupid knife. That
Speaker 1: was all orchestrated because Robin's said, I'm just gonna say it. Uh,
Speaker 1: your husband actually suck one stead like you set a
Speaker 1: flat out and then Giselle said you leave it. I'll
Speaker 1: come back in the house because we said I'm gonna
Speaker 1: work to do because the crew is here for another
Speaker 1: two hours. So that's what I mean when I say
Speaker 1: you guys are the executive and the co EP. Shady
Speaker 1: Preacher featuring Jamal Bryant November. Jamal is good about not
Speaker 1: bragging on himself, but there's a little bragg I want
Speaker 1: to do. You feed the community. When the COVID first started,
Speaker 1: New Birth was very intentional about feeding the community. You
Speaker 1: have fed how many I'm saying it wrong, you have
Speaker 1: done how many? How many? So in the in the pandemic,
Speaker 1: we started giving our groceries and uh, just a month
Speaker 1: ago we hit one million families that we give groceries
Speaker 1: to in the last few years. And it is great
Speaker 1: and it is embarrassing to know that food insecurity is
Speaker 1: that dire. And we're just talking about one metropolitan Erica.
Speaker 1: For Thanksgiving, we're giving our five thousand turkeys. Uh. While
Speaker 1: that sounds good in one way, in another way, it's
Speaker 1: saying that it has to be done. Yeah. Now we
Speaker 1: said one million groceries two years. Families, one million families,
Speaker 1: one million bags of groceries in two years. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: fantast that's fantast I remember when I was when we
Speaker 1: were married and I was the first lady of the
Speaker 1: Paramit Temple Um the Women's Ministry that look, you know
Speaker 1: what I know my next question, the Women's Ministry would decided,
Speaker 1: Jamal has his hands over his face, right, it's covering
Speaker 1: his face. We decided to to feed as many families
Speaker 1: as we could and literally go to their house, knock
Speaker 1: on the door and give them the food. So I
Speaker 1: had like a bus. I had security. I was pregnant
Speaker 1: the time with one of them kids I have and um,
Speaker 1: and I was going knocking on doors. So it's like
Speaker 1: I was in the hood of Baltimore knocking on doors.
Speaker 1: You did not know what was gonna open the door.
Speaker 1: All kinds of things was opening the door as I was. Yes,
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously we were blessing them, but it was
Speaker 1: such a blessing to me to be able to give
Speaker 1: them what the Church gave them, and for me like
Speaker 1: they would invite me in. It would be like a
Speaker 1: weed infestive smelling house, and they would invite me in,
Speaker 1: and I would pray with him a little bit and
Speaker 1: I would say Happy Thanksgiving. But we made sure that
Speaker 1: we gave them food from Thanksgiving to Christmas. Wow, so right,
Speaker 1: enough food for for to last at least a month.
Speaker 1: So yes, as that's what I did as first lady
Speaker 1: at a POM. That fantastic. So look, speaking of gall
Speaker 1: being first lady at Empowerment Temple, tell us Jamal, how
Speaker 1: was just out as a first lady? There's a pause?
Speaker 1: No, no no, no, So just Lle was not a Mother
Speaker 1: Teresa first lady hit her head. She was a Michelle
Speaker 1: Obama first lady. Yes, yes, she was coming in waving.
Speaker 1: I was not waving to the it she was. She
Speaker 1: was the black Princess due. She did a great job. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: while we're on that that note, she did our first
Speaker 1: women's conference. Yes, um, she did a whole lot of
Speaker 1: mentoring a lot of the young girls came to her
Speaker 1: from mentoring. A lot of the young ladies who had
Speaker 1: come to Baltimore to go to either Copping or Morgan
Speaker 1: really pulled on her. She wrote a whole lot of
Speaker 1: a k letters, half of the aks and bolts to
Speaker 1: my let us from Gazelle. Listen, I was the bomb.
Speaker 1: Okay even back then. Now now I want to say,
Speaker 1: there's some things that I missed not being married to
Speaker 1: Jamal Bran Okay, okay, which is one of the things
Speaker 1: I used to complain about. I think I now missage. Okay.
Speaker 1: So you know, like I said, Jamal travels a lot,
Speaker 1: so he would have to get his his suits and
Speaker 1: his ties and his shirts together before he would go
Speaker 1: on his trips. So he would always be like, wake
Speaker 1: me up out of my sleep. Now you want to
Speaker 1: be sleep, and when you sleep, leave me alone. But
Speaker 1: he would wake me up, turn on all the lights.
Speaker 1: He would say, Gazelle, does this suit go with this tie?
Speaker 1: But does this shirt go with this tie? In this suit? Okay,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, let
Speaker 1: me get three other ties. Okay, these three ties go
Speaker 1: with this five shirts. I mean it was like, so
Speaker 1: you missed this. Now I'm just saying you have for
Speaker 1: the store. What she missed I was picking her clothes out.
Speaker 1: That's what she missed. When I was picking her clothes out, robbing,
Speaker 1: she wasn't in no blog when I don't pick it out.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Okay, the same we brought this off ing.
Speaker 1: I need you to be robbing, you gotta be. I
Speaker 1: was my first stylist of truth, the whole truth and
Speaker 1: nothing but the truth, robbing. When I first met you,
Speaker 1: where did I meet you? You met me at the
Speaker 1: A C. Where did I first meet you? Rob Yes?
Speaker 1: It as sacks, yes, true, yes, Sacks yes, yes. So
Speaker 1: she does not miss picking out my ties. She misses
Speaker 1: me dressing her. That's what she's not going to give
Speaker 1: confession to. Okay, this is this is a breaking moment. Yes,
Speaker 1: Jamal Bryant was my first stylist. Really, yes, okay my
Speaker 1: last right and you're only only yes okay. See that
Speaker 1: was one of my one of my questions for jam
Speaker 1: All was how does he go about picking his outfits out?
Speaker 1: Because you know, you look nice and sharp now, but
Speaker 1: I've seen sometimes you have, like, you know, a pink
Speaker 1: tie and a pink silky shirt talking about them Detroit
Speaker 1: player suits you had, Okay, you had some plenty of
Speaker 1: Detroit player suits. Do you do? You have a tailor,
Speaker 1: and you're just like, give me one of every color,
Speaker 1: give me everything in every color, in every print. What
Speaker 1: the shade is coming. It's a work in progress. So
Speaker 1: when I was at U from Detroit, Uh, that's when
Speaker 1: I started wearing gagos So when I met Gazelle, I
Speaker 1: had different color Gators for every suit. Gazelle threw my
Speaker 1: gauges out. So I've tried to purge. I've tried to
Speaker 1: purge that party and walk backwards. It's a working progress, yes,
Speaker 1: but I mean they were like they were like, it's
Speaker 1: like a whole green suit with the matching green gators,
Speaker 1: orange suits with that matching. He had this one white leather.
Speaker 1: They weren't ready. It's definitely not ready. I don't know
Speaker 1: you were killing them, but they weren't ready. White leather,
Speaker 1: trench coade. I couldn't wait for him to go on
Speaker 1: a trip leather. I do that thing in the trash.
Speaker 1: I said, I can't do this. You ain't no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I was ahead of my time. White leather cause, um, okay,
Speaker 1: So where I threw it in the trash can Jamal
Speaker 1: Bryant's it's gone. Okay, that thing probably costs fourteen dollars.
Speaker 1: It is gone. I couldn't take it. Um but no,
Speaker 1: I feel like you have come a long way and
Speaker 1: I love you. Do you do rock the dashiki situation? Sometimes?
Speaker 1: I see you on the Instagram? Um? So, so do
Speaker 1: you like dashiki suits? Get you a man that could
Speaker 1: do both? Did you a man that can do both?
Speaker 1: Is that what he said? But to answer your question,
Speaker 1: he has tailors upon Taylors upon Taylors. Oh yeah, yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I believe that. Yes see, I'm not a really good cook,
Speaker 1: so I'm not. I don't I didn't really wine and
Speaker 1: Dina Jamal a by my home cooking. Right, But what
Speaker 1: was your favorite part of Robber? Let me tell you
Speaker 1: that robbing, Robbing? I gotta tell you this. You know
Speaker 1: what our first fight was in marriage? What was that?
Speaker 1: I have no idea? When are you going to the supermarket?
Speaker 1: You didn't know before robbing she was coming back with
Speaker 1: chips and started getting the home cooked meals to the girls.
Speaker 1: Was oh my god. Okay, but yeah, in my defense,
Speaker 1: in my defense, Jamal, you like to go to restaurants
Speaker 1: to eat. You like to do that, but when we're
Speaker 1: sitting in the same house, you gotta go down the
Speaker 1: state Robin, this is two thousand one, No Huber eating. No,
Speaker 1: there was no brother. This is the one just got
Speaker 1: off a motor rolling two way pages something. Okay, this
Speaker 1: was actually gonna be my last question to you, and
Speaker 1: and we might finish it just for what he just said.
Speaker 1: But anyway, okay, so what was the best part about
Speaker 1: being married to Chisel? Because you're the only person on
Speaker 1: this planet that has been married to me, there's a
Speaker 1: reason there would be a whole another show it to you. No, no, no,
Speaker 1: just Zell pushed me to be better. And she's the
Speaker 1: only one out out of my parents who has spoken
Speaker 1: into my life to really push me to go to
Speaker 1: another level. I preached um at a conference at my
Speaker 1: home church one day and I thought I killed that John.
Speaker 1: I mean, I thought Star Wars the Force was with
Speaker 1: and Giselle. We got in a car and Giselle was like,
Speaker 1: you have really stopped growing? Do you really think just
Speaker 1: the best that you can do? I was high level offended,
Speaker 1: but it really seriously but didn't really go to another point.
Speaker 1: And then when this herschel Walker video went virable, I
Speaker 1: saw Giselle maybe a week after that, and she said,
Speaker 1: this is your vein. Why did you leave that? You
Speaker 1: need to stay in what it is that you're good
Speaker 1: at and be your best. And a lot of people,
Speaker 1: uh don't really have authentic friends that can push you
Speaker 1: to be better. Uh. And so the thing that I
Speaker 1: value about Giselle, She's always pushed me to be better,
Speaker 1: even if she's pushing me over the cliff without a parachute. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're gonna leave it at that. That was such a
Speaker 1: nice way to end. I want everybody know Jamal Bryant
Speaker 1: is one of my favorite people on Earth. Oh that's nice. Yes,
Speaker 1: one of my favorite people on Earth. That don't do
Speaker 1: that because rapping is sitting there, not one of, not
Speaker 1: one of don't do that. You're not the I have.
Speaker 1: Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that because
Speaker 1: rapping is sitting Now. Okay, I have I have Grace
Speaker 1: Angel and my favorite people. It's okay, I can say
Speaker 1: that you you are in the top five. Okay, a
Speaker 1: favorite people. But I have three kids. I have three kids,
Speaker 1: three kids, I have two parents. I have three kids.
Speaker 1: I have two parents. Yes, so you you beat out
Speaker 1: one parent. Jeez. Anyway, thank you for letting me come
Speaker 1: on the show. Words to Live By May nine. So
Speaker 1: Robin has eight sentences that we should all live our
Speaker 1: lives by. So this is gonna be profound, y'all. Y'all,
Speaker 1: you know, we talked about a whole lot of stuff,
Speaker 1: a whole lot of nonsense, but we do try to,
Speaker 1: you know, impart some type of inspirational words as well. Um.
Speaker 1: So I come across these posts on Instagram and I'll
Speaker 1: save them, and I said, I'm going to share this
Speaker 1: with the podcast listeners because I love you all. So
Speaker 1: this is eight sentences that everyone should believe. Okay, Okay,
Speaker 1: so you should believe Okay. So I haven't heard any
Speaker 1: of these sentences, okay, but I'm here to tell you.
Speaker 1: If something sounds crazy, I'm gonna let you know. Okay,
Speaker 1: I appreciate it. Okay. Um, you have to lose a
Speaker 1: few people find yourself. That's true. I like that. I
Speaker 1: like that. But are they um exclusive? You know what
Speaker 1: I mean? Like? Can they be mutually exclusive? Like can
Speaker 1: you find yourself without happening without having to lose people? Yeah? Um.
Speaker 1: According to this post, no you cannot Okay, continue on.
Speaker 1: I think I think it actually should read. You shouldn't
Speaker 1: be afraid to lose a few people to find yourself.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean? I got one for you. Okay, No, okay,
Speaker 1: you do yours, okay before you forget Okay. So this
Speaker 1: is my T. D. Jake's impressionation. Okay, because I've watched
Speaker 1: this real about fourteen times. Okay. So T. D. Jake said,
Speaker 1: you ain't gonna let fear rue rue your life, even
Speaker 1: if you scare, even if you're trembling, even if you
Speaker 1: um can't do it, and you and you're terrified, do
Speaker 1: it anyway, have the courage to do it because you
Speaker 1: don't want to be in the old folks home being
Speaker 1: in a bad band. And you didn't do it? Did
Speaker 1: he really say that? Yes? Yes, And let me tell
Speaker 1: you something. That thing shook me to the core, right you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: But whatever it is I was fearful about. I was
Speaker 1: probably scared that I don't know anyway, But I mean
Speaker 1: I appreciate that like like fear will like debilitate you, yes,
Speaker 1: and it will stop you from from doing a lot
Speaker 1: of stuff that you you you know, it can stop
Speaker 1: you from leading a life that you never even imagine
Speaker 1: that you could leave. Yes, and a lot of times
Speaker 1: the fears in your head, so it's like you're you're
Speaker 1: stopping yourself from doing something. But once you go ahead
Speaker 1: and do it, you look back like, what what was
Speaker 1: the scared of that for? Exactly? And then you know
Speaker 1: you just never want to have regrets. So do you
Speaker 1: want to let fear prevent you from doing stuff that?
Speaker 1: When you're an old folks home, you're like, man, I
Speaker 1: should have just done that, I should have just done X,
Speaker 1: Y and Z. Let me tell you something. I'm out
Speaker 1: here doing it. Yes, yes, all right, so back to
Speaker 1: my list. So you have to lose a few people
Speaker 1: to find yourself, which I think we should edit to say,
Speaker 1: don't be afraid of losing a few people in order
Speaker 1: to find yourself. And I think that you know that
Speaker 1: can apply to friendships, relationships, you know, businesses, whatever, coworkers, um.
Speaker 1: Sometimes people are holding you back, um number two. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it's best to keep it private until you know it's permanent.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something, hunts need hunt. It's very
Speaker 1: difficult for being robbing to keep things private because we're
Speaker 1: on this show your Housewives of Potomach and they all
Speaker 1: in our business. But I do agree with that, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I agree. I mean whenever whatever, it is like in
Speaker 1: good stuff and bad stuff. So I think about when
Speaker 1: you're going through stras. See, it's hard because like when
Speaker 1: you're going through struggles with your partner or with a
Speaker 1: friend or whatever, and then you, um, you can find
Speaker 1: in another person, right, and then you make up, you
Speaker 1: resolve those issues, and then that other person is still
Speaker 1: mad and they like, don't you remember where he did?
Speaker 1: And so it's like sometimes it's like you really have
Speaker 1: to be careful with what you're sharing with people because
Speaker 1: sometimes they're gonna hold hold it against you. And then
Speaker 1: on the flip side, it's like you could think that
Speaker 1: you're about to close a business deal. I don't you
Speaker 1: do you know how many people because in the world
Speaker 1: of reality TV, UM reality TV production companies and casting companies,
Speaker 1: they try to cast people left right up, down all around.
Speaker 1: Do you know how many people I've heard that have
Speaker 1: gone around telling all their friends and family that they're
Speaker 1: going to be famous and they're gonna be on reality
Speaker 1: TV because someone so talked to them and blah blah blah,
Speaker 1: and it doesn't happen, right, So then you're left looking stupid,
Speaker 1: kind of stupid when people are like, hey, whatever happened
Speaker 1: to that show? You said you were going to be one?
Speaker 1: Whatever happened to that? Because I mean and that it's
Speaker 1: so funny because like I applied that to my own
Speaker 1: experience with Potomac. Remember, I mean, could tell you listen,
Speaker 1: we're all season three and I was like, so we're
Speaker 1: on a show, right, Yes, we've been doing this for years.
Speaker 1: What are you talking about? Like the cameras at my door?
Speaker 1: I'm like, what y'all doing here? So so anyway, yeah,
Speaker 1: I just think it's important. It's it's always hard. It's like,
Speaker 1: just be careful with what you share and who you
Speaker 1: share it with and how premature you share and all
Speaker 1: that type of stuff. Okay, now I gotta go back
Speaker 1: to my phone and I gotta a call coming in.
Speaker 1: Why doesn't iPhone like you can't hit decline when your
Speaker 1: phone when you're not like on your phone. Anyway, that's
Speaker 1: a whole another subject. I can we can have our
Speaker 1: iPhone rans later? Okay? Number three? If you can attach,
Speaker 1: you can detach hm. So that that brings me to
Speaker 1: a story so I was, um, this was years ago,
Speaker 1: and I was, um, I thought I was on a date. Okay,
Speaker 1: I was. I was. I was doing a little vak
Speaker 1: with this dude, right, And I didn't really know when
Speaker 1: I was he let's say he had to be there
Speaker 1: for the week and I was in town for a
Speaker 1: couple of days, and I didn't really know when I
Speaker 1: was leaving, right because I had just had stuff to do.
Speaker 1: And he was like, just Elsa, when when are you leaving?
Speaker 1: And I was like, are you trying to get rid
Speaker 1: of me? Right? And he said, no, I need to.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out when to disconnect. Oh, and
Speaker 1: that that also was rude to me. I was like,
Speaker 1: what the hell does that mean? But he I understood,
Speaker 1: like he just wanted to know, like when was the
Speaker 1: disconnection happening? Yeah? So was that so disconnect from like
Speaker 1: being hospitable, or disconnect from me getting out of his room,
Speaker 1: disconnect from us being together? Really? Yeah, he just it
Speaker 1: was a very strange way of him asking me, yes,
Speaker 1: I proceeded to start packing, Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: like okay, you know what in fact, well and my
Speaker 1: flight leaves in ten minutes. But I think really it
Speaker 1: was because I never really had I didn't know when
Speaker 1: I was leaving, so he you know, I guess he
Speaker 1: just needs to know when I was leaving anyway, Yes,
Speaker 1: that that that I mean, I guess that's similar. But
Speaker 1: um yeah, like if you can attach to something or
Speaker 1: some one, then you have the ability to detach as well,
Speaker 1: so don't So it's pretty much don't put all your eggs,
Speaker 1: have them egg scrambletony all over the alright. Number four,
Speaker 1: social media has made perfect look achievable, so now real
Speaker 1: has become undesirable, and that's so true. Yeah, yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean I think honestly, I think even before social media,
Speaker 1: people had issues with trying to achieve perfection. You know,
Speaker 1: whether it's like passed on, passed down from their parents.
Speaker 1: You know how many people I know that have like
Speaker 1: parent issues you know what I'm saying, because their mother
Speaker 1: wanted them to be skinny, or you know what, they
Speaker 1: wanted to live up to their parents expectations and stuff.
Speaker 1: So so yeah, I mean social media definitely. You know
Speaker 1: people on social media, they're not and I would say
Speaker 1: most most of us are guilty of it. We're not
Speaker 1: going to post the ugly pictures, but no I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want y'all see that, right, Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: but you know, it is like the filters and stuff, like,
Speaker 1: you know, you have to be mindful that if you're
Speaker 1: posting a picture and you look nothing like that, you
Speaker 1: don't post that, right that. Yeah, that's an issue. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but yes, we we. I would love to be back
Speaker 1: to real nous because because I do feel like if
Speaker 1: you look at what people look like today with with
Speaker 1: or without filters and stuff, versus what they look like
Speaker 1: in the eighties, you know what I mean, people in
Speaker 1: the eighties were just more raw and more like now
Speaker 1: it's just like, I don't know, we're so like overdone.
Speaker 1: I agreed, agreed, Yes, yeah, And I want to go
Speaker 1: back to having like real conversations with people. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: I used to do that a lot. Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1: All right, let's see number five. Anything that costs you
Speaker 1: your mental health is too expensive look elsewhere, Like what
Speaker 1: give me an example. I mean, anything that's stressing you
Speaker 1: out to the point where you're like, you know, you're
Speaker 1: feeling depressed or yeah, I mean ship that can be
Speaker 1: a whole lot of stuff. So it's pretty much saying
Speaker 1: like there's nothing out here, that's worth compromising and you know,
Speaker 1: weakening your mental health, right, So so yeah, just keep
Speaker 1: that in mind. If something is bothering you to the
Speaker 1: point where it's consuming you and you can't think straight
Speaker 1: and you're depressed, and let it go. Agree Number six.
Speaker 1: If they don't know you personally, never take it personally.
Speaker 1: Oh that's not good on that And that's good for
Speaker 1: people that are in business. Of times, if you're in
Speaker 1: business and something happens and you take it so personally,
Speaker 1: it ain't personal. It is business. That's true. That's true,
Speaker 1: but it's it's like so important. It's like even if
Speaker 1: you know someone like in passing, people still might not
Speaker 1: know the real you, Like if you don't spend a
Speaker 1: lot of time around someone, um, you know, like, still
Speaker 1: don't take that stuff personally personal. Yeah, And I always
Speaker 1: like flip it on a person. I'm like, well, that's
Speaker 1: they issue, that's their insecurity, that's there, you know, whatever,
Speaker 1: their their mama drama that they're putting on you. Yes,
Speaker 1: and if and I just want to put this out there,
Speaker 1: if you want a reality television show and you're getting
Speaker 1: a paycheck, it's business. That's very true. Yeah, just saying
Speaker 1: very true, it's hard, it's a little it's because we are,
Speaker 1: you know, friends, we want to be friends. We want
Speaker 1: to nurture our friendship. Very true. It is definitely a
Speaker 1: fine line. Number seven. Never assumed that loud is strong
Speaker 1: or quiet is weak. It's often the other way around.
Speaker 1: Very true. I would I would agree with that. Yes,
Speaker 1: my grandfather like barely spoke, but when he did, you listen,
Speaker 1: you listen, and even when he was quiet, it was
Speaker 1: like just his presence in the room spoke volume. So yeah,
Speaker 1: I want to stop talking. But then there are some
Speaker 1: people who who you know, they walk in and they're like,
Speaker 1: you know, they they want to be the center of attention.
Speaker 1: And it's like you can just tell like, okay, you're
Speaker 1: not you're not comfortable where you are, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Like it's it's it's yeah, so never soon
Speaker 1: all right, if you're happy alone, you'll be happier together.
Speaker 1: So I guess it's saying, like two people, if you're
Speaker 1: happy and content by yourself, by yourself, then in a relationship,
Speaker 1: that that makes for a better relationship. Facts, yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: and then like you might even like being alone better
Speaker 1: than the relations Just send them home. The yep that
Speaker 1: was it. Those were good. I think people can learn
Speaker 1: from all of those. I mean, something you can speak
Speaker 1: to somebody. Yeah, I think I think that sometimes we
Speaker 1: just have to stop and like really think about what's
Speaker 1: important and what's what's valued, what we're valuing, and what
Speaker 1: we should like get rid of. Yeah, yeah, absolutely, And
Speaker 1: I just like one of my I think people seeking
Speaker 1: per affection is like the root of a lot of
Speaker 1: issues that people have in life, you know. So it's
Speaker 1: just like, if we can just let go of our
Speaker 1: desire to be perfect, in our desire to be perceived
Speaker 1: as perfect, so much will just you know be better.
Speaker 1: Like you know, everyone you're just afraid to fail or
Speaker 1: you don't want to disappoint someone or or you know,
Speaker 1: afraid you don't want to be judged, Like so what Yeah,
Speaker 1: And I don't even really And I tell my this
Speaker 1: to my kids because I'm raising three teenage daughters and
Speaker 1: so that whole perfection thing is huge right now. So
Speaker 1: I always tell them, like, I don't even understand what
Speaker 1: perfect means, Like what does that mean? Right? Who defines perfect? Right?
Speaker 1: Just be yourself and that's the perfect whatever that is
Speaker 1: flaws and all so um, But yeah, I think that
Speaker 1: that's what we're given to the people. Yes, if you are,
Speaker 1: if you are something called perfect, don't be perfect. No,
Speaker 1: that's not you, don't exist. Just be yourself, damn it.
Speaker 1: Figure out what that is. Figure out what makes you happy,
Speaker 1: what makes you sad. Just be yourself. Yes. Reasonably Shady
Speaker 1: is a production of the Black Affect podcast Network. For
Speaker 1: more podcasts from our Heart Radio, visit the I Heart
Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your
Speaker 1: favorite shows, and you can connect with us on social
Speaker 1: media at Robin Dixon, ten, Giselle Briant, and Reasonably Shady