1 00:00:00,920 --> 00:00:03,880 Speaker 1: We're taking you inside the mind of a man. This 2 00:00:04,559 --> 00:00:08,319 Speaker 1: is How Men Thick and I heard radio podcast. All right, 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:12,160 Speaker 1: welcome to How Men Think. I'm here with the man 4 00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:15,560 Speaker 1: of the hour, the Tower of Power. Mr Jerry O'Connell. You, 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,520 Speaker 1: I'm Akbar Baja be a millage so jerryman, it's first off, wait, 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,759 Speaker 1: let me try and spell hold on Okay, good luck? 7 00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:28,080 Speaker 1: G b A j A okay, am I right? So 8 00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:34,559 Speaker 1: yeah b I A uh huh m I l a bro. 9 00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 1: I am going to make you an honorary Nike carea. 10 00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:43,040 Speaker 1: Hey that I didn't know you knew I spell it. 11 00:00:43,440 --> 00:00:45,680 Speaker 1: Most of you can say, most of you the same, 12 00:00:45,760 --> 00:00:47,960 Speaker 1: but a lot of people can't spell it. It took 13 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: me to the second grade to learn how to spell 14 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:55,040 Speaker 1: my last. That's a true story. That's a true story. 15 00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 1: All right, Um, we're so happy to be guest hosting 16 00:00:58,040 --> 00:01:00,960 Speaker 1: How Men Think. We're gonna answer all your questions and 17 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:06,000 Speaker 1: solve the fascinating question of how man thinks. So first, 18 00:01:06,400 --> 00:01:09,920 Speaker 1: this is eleven Questions with Akbar and Jerry. Let's get 19 00:01:10,080 --> 00:01:13,520 Speaker 1: right into it. Jerry, you ready, let's go. You know, 20 00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 1: so you know, we've been having a lot of fun 21 00:01:15,400 --> 00:01:19,520 Speaker 1: on the Talk as as hosts. UM So tell tell, 22 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:22,039 Speaker 1: tell the listeners out there. What are you known for? 23 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:27,399 Speaker 1: Tell us about yourself? UM I a strange question. I 24 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:30,840 Speaker 1: can answer it. I'm Garry O'Connell. Um I. Uh I 25 00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:32,760 Speaker 1: was a young actor. I was in a movie stand 26 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 1: by Me, UM when I was younger, and it was 27 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:39,400 Speaker 1: kind of a cult classic. You know, it did h 28 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: big hit, Yeah, kind of, you know, I think it 29 00:01:43,640 --> 00:01:45,680 Speaker 1: was a cult class. It is a cult classic. I 30 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:47,840 Speaker 1: mean it's not like it's not like Titanic. I don't 31 00:01:47,840 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: think it like like it's not et you know, it's 32 00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:53,600 Speaker 1: not like you know, Independence Day. I don't think it 33 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 1: was like a huge financial hit, but it was like 34 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,360 Speaker 1: it's it was made the thirty over three, two years 35 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:04,360 Speaker 1: ago when people are still talking about it. But um, 36 00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:06,840 Speaker 1: I didn't really act that much as a kid actor. 37 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:09,919 Speaker 1: I went to college and um I really got busy 38 00:02:09,960 --> 00:02:12,760 Speaker 1: again as an actor. UM out of college in my 39 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:15,760 Speaker 1: twenties and uh I acted in a few TV shows, 40 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,320 Speaker 1: a sci fi show called Sliders, a cop show called 41 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:23,840 Speaker 1: Crossing Jordan's UM and UH did a bunch of movies 42 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:28,920 Speaker 1: kangaro Jack with UM did you know after the first movie? 43 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 1: After your first movie you knew, like this is the 44 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:34,200 Speaker 1: path that larta for the rest of my life. You know, Um, 45 00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 1: I knew I felt most comfortable on a set like 46 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:40,960 Speaker 1: I felt. Um, when I was a kid, everyone was 47 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,160 Speaker 1: like at school, I was always getting in trouble for 48 00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,240 Speaker 1: speaking out of turn or you know, just being a 49 00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:48,639 Speaker 1: crazy kid. And when I was on a set on 50 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:51,480 Speaker 1: stand by Me, you know, the director was like, no, 51 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:53,280 Speaker 1: we want you to be crazy in the scene, like 52 00:02:53,440 --> 00:02:56,519 Speaker 1: keep talking, do it. And I remember thinking, I mean 53 00:02:56,560 --> 00:02:59,080 Speaker 1: it was like a light went off my head, like wow, 54 00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:02,320 Speaker 1: I haven't been crazy. I just needed to find my crowd. 55 00:03:03,200 --> 00:03:09,160 Speaker 1: And uh, I um, I've been acting for years and 56 00:03:09,360 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 1: uh about ten years ago, right first, when I met you, 57 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:15,400 Speaker 1: I started to get a little more into the talk 58 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:19,680 Speaker 1: show stuff. Um, with Kelly Rippa, I co hosted with 59 00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:23,519 Speaker 1: with her a lot, and then with Wendy Williams. I 60 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,920 Speaker 1: co hosted with Wendy Williams a lot, and then um, 61 00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:30,000 Speaker 1: this opportunity came up on the talk earlier this year. 62 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 1: I mean, I've only you know, it's it's funny. I 63 00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:37,800 Speaker 1: I came on and March. I mean bar was here 64 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,360 Speaker 1: in August, you know, I mean like it's just you 65 00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:42,560 Speaker 1: know and this is it's a great thing because as 66 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 1: we were guest co hosting, it was so comforting to 67 00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:48,440 Speaker 1: know that, oh, they bring I was like somebody that 68 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:51,240 Speaker 1: I know, you know, and I thought, you know, I 69 00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:54,520 Speaker 1: should be paying you ten percent. No, but I thought 70 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:56,760 Speaker 1: it was very helpful to have somebody that you know, 71 00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:58,760 Speaker 1: that you're familiar with, you know. I mean, especially when 72 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:01,440 Speaker 1: you're in a new format. It's different from doing you know, 73 00:04:01,560 --> 00:04:03,720 Speaker 1: the other shows that I've done before, So it was 74 00:04:03,800 --> 00:04:05,960 Speaker 1: very helpful to kind of like, oh, yeah, I know jury, 75 00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,960 Speaker 1: Oh this is great. So yeah, I mean it is 76 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:11,960 Speaker 1: and it is funny doing a talk show. It's totally different. 77 00:04:12,000 --> 00:04:14,680 Speaker 1: It's and and it's so funny too, because I've done 78 00:04:14,720 --> 00:04:20,840 Speaker 1: a couple of talk shows. Now, um, this uh, this 79 00:04:20,880 --> 00:04:23,839 Speaker 1: talk show is completely different because there's like five voices, 80 00:04:23,960 --> 00:04:27,479 Speaker 1: so you it's not so much even when you're saying something, 81 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 1: it's knowing when to not say something. You know. It's um, 82 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:33,880 Speaker 1: it's really interesting. It's um. It's been a fun run. 83 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:36,200 Speaker 1: And I gotta tell you, I love I love being 84 00:04:36,279 --> 00:04:40,760 Speaker 1: up there with you. You're you're so um your background, 85 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:43,120 Speaker 1: your story, I mean, I'm I'm a I'm a fan 86 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:46,479 Speaker 1: of sports. So I'm so happy to have a former 87 00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 1: NFL player up there. I mean, it's just that's mine 88 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:52,000 Speaker 1: played before. I played one in a movie. I certainly 89 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,000 Speaker 1: didn't come close to playing one in real life. I 90 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:57,400 Speaker 1: just played one on TV. But it's so fun. And 91 00:04:57,440 --> 00:05:01,800 Speaker 1: your stories, um, you know, the your history that you 92 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:05,440 Speaker 1: pull from. Um. You know obviously when you talk about 93 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,599 Speaker 1: you know, your time in the NFL and getting to 94 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,760 Speaker 1: the NFL and playing in a deep one school and 95 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:13,680 Speaker 1: all that stuff is um is very exciting for me. 96 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:18,160 Speaker 1: But um, really, what I find maybe the most interesting 97 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:21,280 Speaker 1: is your childhood and where you're from and your family 98 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:24,359 Speaker 1: and um, where you're from, tell us about that. You know, 99 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:27,080 Speaker 1: so many people, you know, they hear the last name, 100 00:05:27,279 --> 00:05:29,680 Speaker 1: and they hear the first name, they go, well, where 101 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,520 Speaker 1: are you from? And it's a it's a really rich 102 00:05:32,600 --> 00:05:37,279 Speaker 1: story because my parents came to America from Nigeria. My 103 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:39,960 Speaker 1: father came in seventy four, my mom came in like 104 00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:44,120 Speaker 1: sixty nine, and they came like the movie Coming to America. 105 00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:47,320 Speaker 1: They came to America to have a better life, better dream. Well, actually, 106 00:05:47,320 --> 00:05:50,520 Speaker 1: in comeing to America, they were rich, so it wasn't 107 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:53,280 Speaker 1: Maybe that's not a good comparison, but they came over 108 00:05:53,279 --> 00:05:56,359 Speaker 1: here for a better life. And I grew up in 109 00:05:56,360 --> 00:06:00,640 Speaker 1: a household that was rich with Nigerian culture. But I 110 00:06:00,720 --> 00:06:04,200 Speaker 1: also had like essentially like a split personality, not the 111 00:06:04,240 --> 00:06:08,080 Speaker 1: medical term split personality, and that when I went to school, 112 00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:11,719 Speaker 1: I had to be the American kid because back then, 113 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:14,000 Speaker 1: you know you're being made fun of. You know, you 114 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:17,520 Speaker 1: know you're different, right, And so I lived and balance 115 00:06:17,560 --> 00:06:19,720 Speaker 1: in that world. But it gave me so much perspective, 116 00:06:19,760 --> 00:06:22,719 Speaker 1: Like that duality, not only the duality of you know, 117 00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:25,039 Speaker 1: growing up in an African American neighborhood, of growing up 118 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:29,839 Speaker 1: in a Nigerian household. My parents had a different religion. 119 00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:33,200 Speaker 1: My father was Muslim, my mom Christian. So I grew 120 00:06:33,279 --> 00:06:36,120 Speaker 1: up going to the mosque saying a lawak bar and 121 00:06:36,160 --> 00:06:39,280 Speaker 1: then saying praise God and Jesus, you know what I mean. 122 00:06:39,320 --> 00:06:42,000 Speaker 1: So that having that type of perspective, I think it's 123 00:06:42,040 --> 00:06:45,160 Speaker 1: made me. It's such a well rounded person, uh, an 124 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 1: empathic person. You know, you know I do send maybe 125 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,320 Speaker 1: more than um other people, but I tend to be 126 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:57,440 Speaker 1: very empathetic towards people. UM. And it's just really because 127 00:06:57,440 --> 00:07:00,279 Speaker 1: of that that duality and growing up grow been a 128 00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:04,200 Speaker 1: mixed family, although we were never able to say, you know, 129 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,760 Speaker 1: step brothers or anything like that like that was that 130 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:10,440 Speaker 1: that term still sounds unfamiliar to me, but that's um. 131 00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:12,960 Speaker 1: So it's given me a different perspective in life. And 132 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 1: you know, then sports and being in a big community 133 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:21,640 Speaker 1: so big family seven uh seven uh um six sevengs 134 00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,800 Speaker 1: seven of us total, and then being in a big 135 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:29,480 Speaker 1: spot like basketball and then football. Um, the team perspective 136 00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:32,400 Speaker 1: has always been. I've always been about you know that 137 00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:34,880 Speaker 1: that team environment. I love a team like. That's why 138 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:37,320 Speaker 1: the talk environment works for me because it's not a 139 00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:39,560 Speaker 1: one man show, two men. I mean, it's a it's 140 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,880 Speaker 1: a team. It's legit what I call it our starting five. 141 00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:45,040 Speaker 1: I was referred to as their starting five. But it's 142 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:49,160 Speaker 1: impacted me now as as a father and and just 143 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:51,880 Speaker 1: making sure that you know, my kids are well rounded. 144 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:54,520 Speaker 1: Um it's you know a lot of people don't know 145 00:07:54,560 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 1: this about me, but you know that well roundedness carried 146 00:07:57,400 --> 00:08:00,320 Speaker 1: on into my you know, my love or Try album. 147 00:08:00,360 --> 00:08:02,560 Speaker 1: I've done forty countries. I have a goal, by the 148 00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,480 Speaker 1: grace of God, one day to see you know, two 149 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:07,680 Speaker 1: hundred plus countries. I want to go I've been to 150 00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:10,880 Speaker 1: five continents. Um, I should have done Australia. About my 151 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 1: wife said I can't go without her, So I haven't 152 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:18,240 Speaker 1: done that trip. But I want to go to Antarctica 153 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:21,520 Speaker 1: in Australia, so I would complete seven continents. But I 154 00:08:21,560 --> 00:08:25,160 Speaker 1: still need to do the other countries as well. But crazy, Yeah, 155 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:29,280 Speaker 1: did your you you say you're one of seven and 156 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:33,040 Speaker 1: you're on the younger side. Yeah, I'm number six or seven. Um, 157 00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:37,760 Speaker 1: did your older siblings did they guide? Did they help you? 158 00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:41,800 Speaker 1: Did they? Yeah? My oldest brother who's always really like 159 00:08:42,040 --> 00:08:45,280 Speaker 1: you know, a third parent. Um, as my parents were hustling, 160 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:47,560 Speaker 1: we didn't grow up with a lot of means, and 161 00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 1: so my oldest brother fully was always um, you know, 162 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 1: in charge of us and helped raise us and you know, 163 00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,680 Speaker 1: get us to where we need to get get to. 164 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:59,280 Speaker 1: And you know, when he started working, he would always 165 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:01,120 Speaker 1: hook us up with is you know, hand me down. 166 00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:03,160 Speaker 1: But his hand medals were fresh because he had his 167 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:05,439 Speaker 1: own money, you know, right, so we you know, we 168 00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:07,959 Speaker 1: could always resteal some of his stuff because he had 169 00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:10,720 Speaker 1: the cool Raiders jacket that you know, I got Jack 170 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:13,439 Speaker 1: four one day and that was Yeah, there's a remember 171 00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:16,040 Speaker 1: there was an era in a time period where if 172 00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:18,360 Speaker 1: you wore a Raiders jacket, first off, you were cool, 173 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,800 Speaker 1: but you would also get jack fo you lose your 174 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:23,040 Speaker 1: life wearing a Raiders jacket back in the in the 175 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,439 Speaker 1: nineties or late eighties, early nineties. And I remember I 176 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:28,719 Speaker 1: got jacked. I was so mad. How old were you 177 00:09:28,760 --> 00:09:31,560 Speaker 1: when you got jacks for your Raiders jack? Oh? Boy? 178 00:09:31,600 --> 00:09:33,640 Speaker 1: It was in middle school, so it was like seventh pagers. 179 00:09:33,720 --> 00:09:36,120 Speaker 1: I must have been thirteen four tix. Crazy because I 180 00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:40,240 Speaker 1: know you as someone who is six six two fifty. Yeah, 181 00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:44,360 Speaker 1: and you're the last person I would jack anything off. Yeah, 182 00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:47,960 Speaker 1: but when you have a weapon, your size doesn't matter. 183 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:55,160 Speaker 1: Doesn't matter. Yeah, but that so, so a weapon was 184 00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:58,520 Speaker 1: drawn on you for your Raider from a Raiders jacket. 185 00:09:58,679 --> 00:10:01,880 Speaker 1: That's a traumatic experience. Yeah, yeah, it is. It is 186 00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:04,200 Speaker 1: a traumatic experience. But you know, you do learn from 187 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:07,440 Speaker 1: those experience and makes you more vigilant, more hyper aware 188 00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:12,160 Speaker 1: where you are in space. I mean, I mean, I'm 189 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:16,280 Speaker 1: not saying I'm just starting to ask what could you 190 00:10:16,280 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 1: have done differently? And in that situation, we know where 191 00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:22,880 Speaker 1: to be, you know. And it's like it's funny that 192 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:25,040 Speaker 1: you say that because my wife is always getting on 193 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:27,560 Speaker 1: me now until today, Like when we go to a restaurant, 194 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:30,800 Speaker 1: I sit with my back, um, you know, on my 195 00:10:30,840 --> 00:10:33,280 Speaker 1: face facing towards the exit or the front door. I 196 00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:36,480 Speaker 1: always want to see what's coming around um. And it's 197 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:39,680 Speaker 1: just really just I think until then, until it's something 198 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:41,400 Speaker 1: like that happens, you don't know that you need to 199 00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:44,000 Speaker 1: be more aware, you know. So I'm always looking at people. 200 00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 1: So why do you always look at everyone's a threat? 201 00:10:46,240 --> 00:10:48,320 Speaker 1: Because potentially they could be a threat, you know, so 202 00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:51,280 Speaker 1: I want to see it happening before. So I really 203 00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:54,680 Speaker 1: pick up on those types of body cues. Like that's 204 00:10:54,679 --> 00:10:57,480 Speaker 1: a skill. It really is a skill. And here's another 205 00:10:57,480 --> 00:11:00,800 Speaker 1: thing that helps me out too, is it as a 206 00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 1: nosy kid, you know, everybody can relate to Your parents 207 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:05,480 Speaker 1: are arguing and you want to know what they're saying, 208 00:11:05,559 --> 00:11:08,120 Speaker 1: right you just my parents spoke a different language at home, 209 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:11,440 Speaker 1: and I'm like, we weren't fluent in Yoduba, and so 210 00:11:11,480 --> 00:11:13,640 Speaker 1: I'd be listening, I couldn't understand what they were saying, 211 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:17,440 Speaker 1: so I could only rely on body language. So I 212 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:20,560 Speaker 1: became instilled, to this day, very proficient in reading. By 213 00:11:20,559 --> 00:11:22,520 Speaker 1: the look, you could be talking to me, and I 214 00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:24,640 Speaker 1: hear nothing you're saying, and I'm looking at your body, 215 00:11:24,679 --> 00:11:27,559 Speaker 1: and your body is telling me everything. Yeah, it's a 216 00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,160 Speaker 1: So I look at that, and so I see somebody 217 00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:32,720 Speaker 1: who's I think this person is about to jack this dude. Right, 218 00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:36,480 Speaker 1: I can see things happening before when, which is crazy. 219 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:39,680 Speaker 1: When you played for the Raiders. Yeah, did you replace 220 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,679 Speaker 1: that jacket? You've got jack for it? Yeah, I got 221 00:11:42,720 --> 00:11:44,280 Speaker 1: a lot I got, I got, I got a lot 222 00:11:44,320 --> 00:11:47,640 Speaker 1: of Raiders get her, that's for sure, Raider shorts, Raiders 223 00:11:47,679 --> 00:11:52,120 Speaker 1: shirts because it's still the coldest color in all of all. 224 00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:55,679 Speaker 1: And I listen, I don't want to have set you 225 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,000 Speaker 1: but you know, I'm not even a Raider saying, but 226 00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:03,439 Speaker 1: if a Raiders shirt? Guys, where how men think? My 227 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:06,000 Speaker 1: My wife is from Oakland? So I will wear Raiding 228 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:11,280 Speaker 1: born raised, her mom live in Oakland. Oh, we gotta 229 00:12:11,360 --> 00:12:15,320 Speaker 1: hang out. I um, i've met yet, and you've not 230 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,120 Speaker 1: met my wife yet to this day. Yeah, we have 231 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:19,240 Speaker 1: to have a day. Um to this day, though, I 232 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:21,880 Speaker 1: will wear I will wear Raiders gear. I'm not sure 233 00:12:21,920 --> 00:12:24,079 Speaker 1: i'll wear a Raiders jersey. That's taking it like too far. 234 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:27,080 Speaker 1: I might wear your jersey I'm gonna bring you my jersey, 235 00:12:27,559 --> 00:12:31,320 Speaker 1: you know. Um, because you're an actor, I've always wondered this, 236 00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:34,800 Speaker 1: do you watch and appreciate other shows? What do you 237 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:36,920 Speaker 1: binge watch? For example? I I've beene watched for that's 238 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:39,800 Speaker 1: because I'm not an actor. Do you binge watch? Yeah? 239 00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:43,240 Speaker 1: Any three shows you're binge watching? And it's not shows 240 00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:45,840 Speaker 1: that I'm beinge watching. I'm very particular about shows that 241 00:12:45,920 --> 00:12:50,320 Speaker 1: binge watched. The best show ever made on TV, I 242 00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:54,560 Speaker 1: believe was Squid Game and I watched every episode. Really yeah, man, 243 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,000 Speaker 1: that's squid Game is really good. And it was really 244 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:59,679 Speaker 1: good because it was completely different from anything I've ever 245 00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:02,000 Speaker 1: seen TV. Okay, so tell me because I'm not My 246 00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:04,959 Speaker 1: kids have been asking and I've heard all that. All 247 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:07,000 Speaker 1: its gory, it's you know, it's not for kids. So 248 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:10,160 Speaker 1: I've not seen it because my kids can't see it. Um? 249 00:13:10,320 --> 00:13:12,240 Speaker 1: Is it is it that bad? Is it? I mean, 250 00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,720 Speaker 1: it's it's about as bad as it kids. Yeah, it's 251 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:18,040 Speaker 1: it's worse thing like Freddy Krueger. It's hyper violent. You know, 252 00:13:18,160 --> 00:13:25,760 Speaker 1: typically Korean cinema um uses I believe uses violence to 253 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:27,800 Speaker 1: get a reaction, you know. I mean, if you ever 254 00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:31,120 Speaker 1: saw that film Parasite that when all those else and 255 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:33,360 Speaker 1: that film, it starts off as like sort of like 256 00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,520 Speaker 1: a quiet family drama and then it turns into this 257 00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:39,680 Speaker 1: you know, spoiler alert, hyper violent film, you know, And 258 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:42,520 Speaker 1: I think Squid Game does the same thing. Um, I 259 00:13:42,559 --> 00:13:45,559 Speaker 1: can't do it. I'm not a hyper violent guy. And 260 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:49,000 Speaker 1: I don't know why. Um maybe as my childhood. I 261 00:13:49,040 --> 00:13:50,960 Speaker 1: don't know what I mean. I mean, I can handle 262 00:13:51,000 --> 00:13:53,240 Speaker 1: a certain level of violence, but when it gets like 263 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:56,880 Speaker 1: like sawt, I could do it after one, I can't 264 00:13:56,880 --> 00:14:01,080 Speaker 1: do it. I don't do this saws. I I do 265 00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:03,679 Speaker 1: the squad game. But I also I've beinge Um, I've 266 00:14:03,679 --> 00:14:08,600 Speaker 1: benched all a Breaking Bad. Oh sorry, that's man breaking Back. 267 00:14:08,679 --> 00:14:11,959 Speaker 1: I came to Breaking Bad late. Breaking Bad is one 268 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:15,040 Speaker 1: of my all time It is the best ever, like 269 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:20,480 Speaker 1: ever his character. Yeah, um and uh, but I I'm 270 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:22,800 Speaker 1: very particular about what I've benched watched. Have you watched 271 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,480 Speaker 1: the Morning Show? I love the Worship Morning Try. I'm binging. 272 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:28,400 Speaker 1: I gotta wait um for this next episode I come out. 273 00:14:28,480 --> 00:14:31,560 Speaker 1: But I'm loving the Morning Show right now. Really yeah, 274 00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:34,280 Speaker 1: I'm really loving I'm kind of like I like, you know, 275 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,920 Speaker 1: like that type of drama stuff. I grew up watching 276 00:14:36,960 --> 00:14:40,600 Speaker 1: soap propers. So Bunny, we had a soap star on 277 00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:45,480 Speaker 1: our show. Uh, and pardon my ignorance, I had no 278 00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:49,800 Speaker 1: idea who it was. But you were like, oh, Dr Jones, 279 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:52,560 Speaker 1: you're on our show. And you were like that one 280 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:56,360 Speaker 1: time when your wife, that's your girlfriend, and you knew 281 00:14:56,400 --> 00:14:59,440 Speaker 1: the whole storyline. Really, people don't know this is this 282 00:14:59,600 --> 00:15:02,640 Speaker 1: kind of something, and I keep private, I guess until now, 283 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:07,080 Speaker 1: until now, But I grew up watching soap opera. In fact, 284 00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:10,320 Speaker 1: I blame my oldest brother, my oldest brother, so I 285 00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:12,280 Speaker 1: can't even tell you the whope. We were in ABC 286 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:16,120 Speaker 1: soap family. So we would watch, um, this is before 287 00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:19,520 Speaker 1: your time. We would watch Loving, we would watch All 288 00:15:19,520 --> 00:15:22,480 Speaker 1: My Children. We would watch One Life to Live. We 289 00:15:22,520 --> 00:15:25,160 Speaker 1: would watch General Hospital, and back in the day, there 290 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:26,840 Speaker 1: used to be this older one. This is when I 291 00:15:26,920 --> 00:15:29,240 Speaker 1: was a young kid. For your time. Um, there's one 292 00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:32,080 Speaker 1: called Ryan's Hope. Um, we would watch Ryan's. I mean, 293 00:15:32,120 --> 00:15:34,360 Speaker 1: you can google all these these are icon of Not 294 00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:35,920 Speaker 1: a lot of them are off the air now, but 295 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:38,040 Speaker 1: it was. There was some good time and we take 296 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:41,440 Speaker 1: them on BCRs and so by time we got home, 297 00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:43,880 Speaker 1: school got out three or five, we walked in the house. 298 00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:47,720 Speaker 1: Oprah was just starting at three o'clock. Watched every day. 299 00:15:47,840 --> 00:15:50,000 Speaker 1: I watched Oprah every day, and then we would go 300 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,720 Speaker 1: back and then start the BCR and we would go 301 00:15:52,760 --> 00:15:54,640 Speaker 1: through and watch our soap prop and why our parents 302 00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:57,200 Speaker 1: were like, why don't you watch? Why don't you starting 303 00:15:57,360 --> 00:16:00,400 Speaker 1: your homework? Oh, we want to see Erica came. Something's 304 00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:03,080 Speaker 1: about to happen to a Errica cage. That's Susan Lucci, 305 00:16:03,120 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 1: she played Erica. Of course. Of course, Actually I didn't 306 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:11,920 Speaker 1: know that. Oh it's been so blown away when Susan. 307 00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:13,680 Speaker 1: Oh no, Susan Luchi didn't come to her. No, no, 308 00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:16,320 Speaker 1: if I ever met Susan Lucci. I remember when she 309 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:20,240 Speaker 1: finally got her award shot and it would just took forever. 310 00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:22,400 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is I mean, even when she had 311 00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:25,640 Speaker 1: to split personality like she had two different um, it 312 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 1: was like the good Susan or good Erica came, Bad 313 00:16:28,640 --> 00:16:31,800 Speaker 1: Erica came and I stopped, Man, what else does she 314 00:16:31,920 --> 00:16:34,680 Speaker 1: need to do to be able to get that Awarden? 315 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:38,640 Speaker 1: So when she finally won, it was if I remember correct, 316 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,440 Speaker 1: and then maybe I'm wrong, I could be remembering this wrong. 317 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,280 Speaker 1: We have to look it up, but I can still 318 00:16:42,280 --> 00:16:45,280 Speaker 1: see her wearing like a red dress and she was 319 00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:48,080 Speaker 1: just so emotional and just like I just remember being 320 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:49,760 Speaker 1: so happy for her as if I knew her. I 321 00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:52,240 Speaker 1: don't know her. I've never met her before. If I did, 322 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:54,720 Speaker 1: I would, I would I probably cry how far I 323 00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:57,880 Speaker 1: think I think that's about to change her on the talk. Look, 324 00:16:58,080 --> 00:17:02,960 Speaker 1: let me ask you, um, American Ninja Warrior. Everybody knows 325 00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:06,200 Speaker 1: what it is. Everybody loves it. Um. It's a life 326 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:10,840 Speaker 1: changing project that you're a part of. Um. That's not 327 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:13,560 Speaker 1: an exaggeration, No, it's not. It changed my life, um 328 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:16,639 Speaker 1: like seriously changed the trajectory of my career. You know. 329 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:19,680 Speaker 1: One of the hardest things to do is transition from football. 330 00:17:20,080 --> 00:17:22,359 Speaker 1: You're at the highest level. There is no other level 331 00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:26,199 Speaker 1: after the NFL, and once you reach that peak and 332 00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:28,920 Speaker 1: then you're done, it's like what do you do next? Right? 333 00:17:29,240 --> 00:17:32,960 Speaker 1: So there is this what feels like this precipitous fall, 334 00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:36,919 Speaker 1: right like some call it humility, some called it the 335 00:17:36,960 --> 00:17:40,000 Speaker 1: real world, real life. UM. I tend to think that 336 00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,320 Speaker 1: the NFL is real life. Right. You just worked so 337 00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:45,000 Speaker 1: hard towards something and then you make that transition and 338 00:17:45,000 --> 00:17:46,600 Speaker 1: it was so hard trying to think what was I 339 00:17:46,640 --> 00:17:49,240 Speaker 1: going to do next? And in a million years, I 340 00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:52,399 Speaker 1: never thought, because I didn't have this illustrious Hall of Fame, 341 00:17:52,760 --> 00:17:56,239 Speaker 1: super Bowl playoff winning type career, that I would ever 342 00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:57,960 Speaker 1: be able to get into this And so being able 343 00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:01,480 Speaker 1: to give that audition for American in Ge Warrior take 344 00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:04,919 Speaker 1: us to the audition process. Well, so prior to I 345 00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:07,000 Speaker 1: was trying to get my feet in the game, right, 346 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:11,760 Speaker 1: you know, I was doing college football like no Indivision two, um, 347 00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:16,159 Speaker 1: you know, Conference USA type of type of games. I 348 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 1: have a friend who with smyeah I did, I did, 349 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,639 Speaker 1: I did SMU, I did all of them two lade, 350 00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:26,320 Speaker 1: the whole nine and uh. And I'm going on other 351 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:29,359 Speaker 1: auditions and I was doing commercials that you know at 352 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,400 Speaker 1: SAG grade or whenever it get a couple hundred bucks 353 00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:33,360 Speaker 1: or whatever, just trying to make it in and trying 354 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:36,960 Speaker 1: to find find my in. No. No, no, no, no no. 355 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:40,399 Speaker 1: After a while, you just like get numb to it. 356 00:18:41,359 --> 00:18:44,679 Speaker 1: I get the call for American and Warrior, and to 357 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:47,400 Speaker 1: be honest, I lied, And sometimes you have to do. 358 00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:49,640 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, you've you ever heard of it? Oh? Yeah, yeah, 359 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:51,720 Speaker 1: I heard it. Oh yeah, I love it, love it, 360 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,639 Speaker 1: love it. Never watched the day in my life, so 361 00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:55,800 Speaker 1: before my audition, I'm just kind of looking at it 362 00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,159 Speaker 1: just didn't sound or feel like anything I was I 363 00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,840 Speaker 1: would even listen to. And I didn't even know American 364 00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,440 Speaker 1: Engine Warrior was on before you were on it. Yeah. Yeah, 365 00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:08,040 Speaker 1: I came in season five and they didn't have announcers 366 00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:10,120 Speaker 1: and they did Matt Eisbell was still there. But then 367 00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:13,320 Speaker 1: the position that I was auditioning for someone else, yeah 368 00:19:13,359 --> 00:19:16,240 Speaker 1: it was someone else, and um so I just you know, 369 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,680 Speaker 1: they're probably not gonna hire me, right because I every God, 370 00:19:19,800 --> 00:19:22,720 Speaker 1: this shot going to I don't get it. But there 371 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:25,160 Speaker 1: was a key that opened up for me because I relaxed. 372 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:27,120 Speaker 1: But I just went there because I was a w 373 00:19:27,119 --> 00:19:29,399 Speaker 1: w E fan, right, I grew up and I just 374 00:19:29,440 --> 00:19:33,000 Speaker 1: brought my my my version of a w w E 375 00:19:33,080 --> 00:19:36,960 Speaker 1: annalyncer over the top. You know, I love muscle parts 376 00:19:36,960 --> 00:19:39,200 Speaker 1: like I can name all the different muscles in the body, 377 00:19:39,359 --> 00:19:42,879 Speaker 1: and um so I just started being very descriptive using 378 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:46,360 Speaker 1: my football analysis background but with a w w E flavor, 379 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,040 Speaker 1: and I walked out lets shook everybody's hand, didn't think 380 00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:52,480 Speaker 1: twice about it. Two weeks later, I get a phone call. 381 00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:54,919 Speaker 1: Here know, I said, hold on what I got it, 382 00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,360 Speaker 1: And that's how it started. And then since then, I mean, 383 00:19:57,400 --> 00:19:59,280 Speaker 1: my first year was rough, but after that I just 384 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:01,280 Speaker 1: kind of grew with a show. And it's been it's 385 00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:04,320 Speaker 1: been amazing ten years now. It's so funny. The biggest 386 00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:08,679 Speaker 1: job of your life happened because you had prepared up 387 00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,200 Speaker 1: until that moment. But when you got there, you use 388 00:20:12,280 --> 00:20:15,080 Speaker 1: the key analogy the other day, tell us about the 389 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:16,919 Speaker 1: key and now, I mean, this is this is exactly 390 00:20:17,000 --> 00:20:19,280 Speaker 1: what happened with you in American You know what the 391 00:20:19,359 --> 00:20:21,600 Speaker 1: key analogy is? Like, you know how when you're trying 392 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:24,040 Speaker 1: so hard to find your chees and like, I gotta 393 00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:25,480 Speaker 1: find my keys. I gotta find my keys, and you 394 00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:28,159 Speaker 1: can't look in your tearing up the whole place. But 395 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,800 Speaker 1: the minute you relax and you just like, forget it. 396 00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:33,720 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna let it come to me. Um, and 397 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:36,520 Speaker 1: then it comes it just it comes right to you, 398 00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:38,280 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. And that's what happened when 399 00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:42,720 Speaker 1: in the word man, incredible, incredible story. Yeah. Thanks, um, okay, 400 00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,800 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna ask you what's your favorite food? My 401 00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:49,320 Speaker 1: favorite food? Yeah, part of This is gonna upset you 402 00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,720 Speaker 1: because I know you're you're you are health conscious, yes, 403 00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,399 Speaker 1: and you're mostly about what you put in your body. 404 00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,800 Speaker 1: I mean you're mostly like I've seen bar on the 405 00:20:57,880 --> 00:21:01,399 Speaker 1: gym and you let wait, yeah, you throw some weight up, 406 00:21:01,840 --> 00:21:03,720 Speaker 1: but you're all about what you put in. What is 407 00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:07,359 Speaker 1: your favorite food? What is this? I like a chain 408 00:21:08,200 --> 00:21:14,120 Speaker 1: of Mexican restaurants where you drive through, Oh oh that 409 00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:18,080 Speaker 1: is that has taco in the title and thing. Yeah, no, 410 00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:20,600 Speaker 1: I'm cool. Um, you don't. You don't ever do it. 411 00:21:20,640 --> 00:21:22,520 Speaker 1: You don't ever go to that track. What is your 412 00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:26,600 Speaker 1: keep meal? Um? In and out? Yeah, in and out, 413 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:29,000 Speaker 1: because I mean, at least the burgers are fresh. But 414 00:21:29,119 --> 00:21:33,680 Speaker 1: my favorite food is goat meat. I love goat meat. 415 00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:36,719 Speaker 1: I can never say mutton or is it to go 416 00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:39,160 Speaker 1: to meat? Is how you soak meat? Go to meat? 417 00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:42,040 Speaker 1: What's the differtween mutton and goat meat? I have never 418 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:44,680 Speaker 1: held a mutton? Um? All right, So then you gotta 419 00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:51,040 Speaker 1: ask me. Um, yeah, you go ahead, Um, oh yeah, Saturday? 420 00:21:51,200 --> 00:21:55,359 Speaker 1: What is doing Saturday morning? What am I doing Saturday morning? 421 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:58,439 Speaker 1: I'm getting I'm sneaking up out of the bed at 422 00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:01,000 Speaker 1: what time? At about seven am? Because the kids get 423 00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:05,240 Speaker 1: up at ten am, I'm making myself coffee, I'm walking 424 00:22:05,320 --> 00:22:09,560 Speaker 1: the dogs. I get back, I check my fantasy football team, 425 00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:11,840 Speaker 1: and I just try to watch any show before. I 426 00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,680 Speaker 1: try to do all this in a three hour period 427 00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:15,679 Speaker 1: before my kids get up. So I had time to myself. 428 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:17,600 Speaker 1: So you're someone who likes to get up before anybody 429 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:20,320 Speaker 1: else gets up. And yeah, so I had the time 430 00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:22,240 Speaker 1: to myself. I will say that since I've been working 431 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:24,600 Speaker 1: with you, you are first one in, last one out. 432 00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:28,240 Speaker 1: I mean you get here at five am? Yeah? I do. Yeah? Um, 433 00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,240 Speaker 1: is that the beat traffic? Is that because you like 434 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:32,000 Speaker 1: to just like I have to get my work out in. 435 00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,800 Speaker 1: Workout is like if I don't have my workout in, 436 00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:39,000 Speaker 1: I feel like I don't have the best attitude. Really yeah, Um, 437 00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:41,479 Speaker 1: you don't ever skip workouts? You don't ever sleep Sometimes 438 00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:44,280 Speaker 1: if I'm tired, Yeah, I will skip, but not always. Um. 439 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:47,840 Speaker 1: Do you send them to learn to wake up? No? 440 00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:50,719 Speaker 1: Yes and no? But I always wake up? I got 441 00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:56,560 Speaker 1: so I've always help. Uh So tell me this, Um, 442 00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:58,920 Speaker 1: what what makes you the most happy? Like girl talk? 443 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,639 Speaker 1: What makes you the most happy? Um? Something with my kids, 444 00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:04,080 Speaker 1: some people, with my wife. When my wife and kids 445 00:23:04,080 --> 00:23:07,520 Speaker 1: are happy. I'm I'm at my happiest, you know, when 446 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:13,320 Speaker 1: they're really happy. And I was about to say winning 447 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:15,399 Speaker 1: in fantasy football, but you know what's so messed up 448 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:18,119 Speaker 1: about fantasy football when and this is why I should 449 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:21,720 Speaker 1: probably never play anymore. When you lose, it annoys you 450 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:24,200 Speaker 1: to no end. And when you win, when you win, 451 00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,679 Speaker 1: you're like, yeah, I deserve to win, and you like, 452 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,119 Speaker 1: don't even think about it. So there's really no upside 453 00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:31,800 Speaker 1: of playing fantasy It's just it's just it's like a 454 00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:33,920 Speaker 1: life of misery. So you told me what makes you 455 00:23:33,960 --> 00:23:36,000 Speaker 1: the most happy? I need to go a little negget here? 456 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:42,280 Speaker 1: Can I tell you what my pet peeves? Flies? I 457 00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:44,879 Speaker 1: hate flies, Like seriously, if you want to see the 458 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:48,240 Speaker 1: worst version of me, have just one fly around. I 459 00:23:48,240 --> 00:23:50,439 Speaker 1: can't even only get grossed out when I see a 460 00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:52,760 Speaker 1: fly on if I see a fly land on my food, 461 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:56,359 Speaker 1: I can't, I can't. I'm done. I'm done because you 462 00:23:56,359 --> 00:24:01,960 Speaker 1: know what, you know, even if it's if I see 463 00:24:02,000 --> 00:24:04,440 Speaker 1: a fly on my food, it's you might as sold 464 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:06,359 Speaker 1: to throw it away. All right, last question here, and 465 00:24:06,359 --> 00:24:09,480 Speaker 1: then well I think we should take some phone calls. Um, 466 00:24:09,520 --> 00:24:17,000 Speaker 1: what keeps you motivated. I wish I had a really 467 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:20,080 Speaker 1: good answer for that, like, uh, I'll tell your kids 468 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:24,800 Speaker 1: you motivated, but drive. Um. But I tend to have 469 00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:27,600 Speaker 1: a little bit of an easier attitude. I mean almost 470 00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:32,520 Speaker 1: like you going to an audition for Ninja Warrior. By 471 00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,120 Speaker 1: the way, earlier, when you said, oh, I lied about like, 472 00:24:35,200 --> 00:24:36,919 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, did I say he 473 00:24:36,960 --> 00:24:41,800 Speaker 1: was a ninja. That's because that's a crazy lie. Yeah, 474 00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:47,040 Speaker 1: I'm a ninja. Um. But I I don't know if 475 00:24:47,040 --> 00:24:51,960 Speaker 1: I have like a motivational thing about me. Um. You know, 476 00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:54,840 Speaker 1: I will say this something that's kept me motivated about health. 477 00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:58,560 Speaker 1: And I actually showed you this meme. Um, somebody I 478 00:24:58,640 --> 00:25:01,000 Speaker 1: worked with, a train or who I used to work with, 479 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,960 Speaker 1: who I haven't been going in to see him lately, 480 00:25:03,440 --> 00:25:04,960 Speaker 1: and he just wanted to make sure I was still 481 00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:09,480 Speaker 1: um uh like getting in the gym was it was 482 00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:11,240 Speaker 1: a picture of Muhammad Ali and I showed it to 483 00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:17,560 Speaker 1: you and he said, um, life changing results lies in 484 00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:21,920 Speaker 1: your daily routine. Yeah, And that got me into the 485 00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:23,520 Speaker 1: gym a couple of mornings. I think I showed it 486 00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:25,000 Speaker 1: to you when I showed up earlier in the gym. 487 00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:27,840 Speaker 1: But then I stopped going. You know, for me like 488 00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:31,840 Speaker 1: mine is really is crazy. What motivates me is um 489 00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:35,360 Speaker 1: the fear, the fear of failure, the fear of not 490 00:25:35,560 --> 00:25:38,400 Speaker 1: being good enough. So yeah, it's just he's a good 491 00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:41,320 Speaker 1: motivating Yeah, it is, so I think. You know, I'm 492 00:25:41,320 --> 00:25:42,840 Speaker 1: sure there are a lot of people who can relate 493 00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,439 Speaker 1: to that. Jerry, We've said a lot here. Let's go 494 00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:48,560 Speaker 1: to break, Let's take a let's let's take let's let's 495 00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,679 Speaker 1: get a drink of water. Right, take a break, and 496 00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:53,720 Speaker 1: then we'll be right back and we'll take some calls. Wait, 497 00:25:53,800 --> 00:26:05,600 Speaker 1: that's cool. Hey is that Brandy brand? Where where are 498 00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:08,399 Speaker 1: you calling from? I'm from the bay Area bay Area? 499 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 1: Hold on, I'm confused. What do you mean the bay 500 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:14,159 Speaker 1: Area like San Frantisco bay Area. Oh yeah, okay, I 501 00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:15,760 Speaker 1: used to live I used to live in the Bay Area. 502 00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:22,080 Speaker 1: So question, if you get with one of your best friends, 503 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:26,160 Speaker 1: can you still remain close with them and not have 504 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:30,720 Speaker 1: awkward tension? Well, what do you mean? Elaborate what you 505 00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:34,440 Speaker 1: mean to get with? You hook up with your best friends? 506 00:26:36,280 --> 00:26:40,879 Speaker 1: Like physically, yes, we're both married, so I mean I 507 00:26:40,920 --> 00:26:43,639 Speaker 1: don't know. Hold on, No, that's the good question. So 508 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,639 Speaker 1: you you you got your best friend, you hooked up, 509 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 1: and then what happened? What's your question after that? And 510 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,680 Speaker 1: then how do you just get over the awkward feelings 511 00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:56,480 Speaker 1: and remain like can you remain as close? For know 512 00:26:56,720 --> 00:26:59,520 Speaker 1: that that one's that one's difficult. I think it takes 513 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:02,280 Speaker 1: both used to be very disciplined, because I do. I 514 00:27:02,320 --> 00:27:05,439 Speaker 1: do believe once you exchange that type of energy between 515 00:27:05,480 --> 00:27:08,919 Speaker 1: each other, you you never you can't forget it. You 516 00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:11,800 Speaker 1: can't like let it in, you know, empty out your mind. 517 00:27:12,200 --> 00:27:15,520 Speaker 1: I think the best way is that both parties were 518 00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:19,440 Speaker 1: in a different relationship. That then tends to soften it up. Um, 519 00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:22,440 Speaker 1: And it may keep you distance because you have your 520 00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:24,880 Speaker 1: life with your other partner, you know what I mean. 521 00:27:25,640 --> 00:27:27,800 Speaker 1: You're doing other things and it keeps the focus off 522 00:27:27,840 --> 00:27:29,480 Speaker 1: of it. But if you guys are both single and 523 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:31,960 Speaker 1: you're just and you're used to talking with each other 524 00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:35,399 Speaker 1: all the time, Yeah, but that's uncomfortable. I had a 525 00:27:35,400 --> 00:27:38,240 Speaker 1: situation very close like that in in college, but I 526 00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:41,560 Speaker 1: never crossed the line, and I'm glad I didn't because 527 00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:45,520 Speaker 1: it had been very difficult to maintain. Yeah. Yeah, so 528 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,679 Speaker 1: you almost you almost give it up, You almost give 529 00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:54,040 Speaker 1: it a friendship it becomes different, it changes, it's not 530 00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:56,919 Speaker 1: going to be what it was before. You can be 531 00:27:57,080 --> 00:28:00,880 Speaker 1: like best friends again. Really will never like have relationship again. 532 00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:04,119 Speaker 1: It's not that you won't you won't have that relationship. 533 00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:07,119 Speaker 1: It's like remodeling your house. Once you've gone through and 534 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:09,920 Speaker 1: recontract like that, the other version of the house is gone. 535 00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:14,840 Speaker 1: So you have to appreciate what the new relationship is. Yeah, 536 00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,800 Speaker 1: does that make sense? Yeah, so you can't. You can't. 537 00:28:19,320 --> 00:28:23,159 Speaker 1: You can't reminisce about what it was like before and 538 00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:28,960 Speaker 1: expect for it to return to normal. Yeah that makes sense. 539 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:33,840 Speaker 1: And yeah, all right, yeah, I hope that helped. No, 540 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:38,800 Speaker 1: it does help. That's actually really nice to hear. All right, 541 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:42,760 Speaker 1: all right, Brad, right, thank you? Hey, can't get can you? 542 00:28:42,840 --> 00:28:44,400 Speaker 1: Can you give this to me one time? Because this 543 00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:45,920 Speaker 1: is what I remember. I don't know if they still 544 00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:48,360 Speaker 1: say this in the Bay Area, say that was heca cool? 545 00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:54,520 Speaker 1: That was hella? Hella? Hello? Do you guys do say 546 00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:58,160 Speaker 1: that out there? Um? Hella? I feel like people do 547 00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:01,000 Speaker 1: say hello. I think I came to well because like 548 00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,040 Speaker 1: it's Ohio, and I came to song. I think I 549 00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:08,800 Speaker 1: said hella a few times and everyone was like yeah, yeah, 550 00:29:08,880 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: I was like, okay, yeah, we don't like talk like 551 00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:16,960 Speaker 1: that here, all right, thank you guys. Hey Sophie, Sophie, 552 00:29:16,960 --> 00:29:19,800 Speaker 1: who are you and where are you calling from? I'm Sophie. 553 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:24,440 Speaker 1: I'm calling from Boulder, Colorado. What's your question for us? Okay? 554 00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:29,000 Speaker 1: So my question was, if you've been dating the same 555 00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,120 Speaker 1: boy or just person in general for a while, what 556 00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:34,880 Speaker 1: is good advice in terms of keeping things interesting. I 557 00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:36,960 Speaker 1: know that a lot of people fell into routines during 558 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:40,480 Speaker 1: covid um, so just kind of advice for making sure 559 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:43,720 Speaker 1: every day isn't exactly the same and just keeping things interesting. 560 00:29:46,280 --> 00:29:50,240 Speaker 1: How do you keep my relationship fresh? I mean, you 561 00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:52,440 Speaker 1: gotta get out of the house first of all. I 562 00:29:52,480 --> 00:29:56,840 Speaker 1: always found like it's funny. I hated being in relationships 563 00:29:56,840 --> 00:30:01,840 Speaker 1: where people I just wanted to um Netflix and chill. 564 00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,360 Speaker 1: Like I had to go out and go do something, 565 00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:06,440 Speaker 1: you know, even if you don't want to go, even 566 00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,960 Speaker 1: if it's boring, at least it's like even the most 567 00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:14,760 Speaker 1: mundane things like start like are stimulating, like start a conversation. 568 00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:20,640 Speaker 1: I was very much into activities, going somewhere and doing something. 569 00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:23,880 Speaker 1: And by the way, I was always very good about dating, 570 00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:26,360 Speaker 1: Like I always like I said, like, hey, I'll pick 571 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,320 Speaker 1: you up and we'll go and do this, you know, um, 572 00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:32,680 Speaker 1: whether it was like you know, a play, a movie, 573 00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:37,200 Speaker 1: a haunted house, UM, an amusement park. I just I 574 00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:40,040 Speaker 1: always tried to go do something, so just get stimulated 575 00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:42,000 Speaker 1: to alongside. Yeah, I love that and I think it's 576 00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:44,920 Speaker 1: piggybag off of that. Um. You know, Sophie, you know 577 00:30:45,040 --> 00:30:47,400 Speaker 1: something that could be how are you? If you don't 578 00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 1: mind me asking twenty? I think you're very familiar with 579 00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:55,520 Speaker 1: TikTok and Instagram, social media, and there are always these 580 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,760 Speaker 1: challenges that pop up every so often, right, um, And 581 00:30:59,840 --> 00:31:02,440 Speaker 1: I think a great way to spice up a relationship 582 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:05,480 Speaker 1: is just going out there and challenging yourself. So doing 583 00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:09,320 Speaker 1: different challenges like let's say, for example, you've never been fishing. 584 00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:12,720 Speaker 1: You know, like you offer up like maybe every Friday 585 00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:16,120 Speaker 1: or every other friday realistically, depending on your schedule. You know, 586 00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:19,320 Speaker 1: you say, uh, we're gonna do something we've never done before, 587 00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 1: and you get to learn a lot about each other. 588 00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:23,720 Speaker 1: You might find out like, oh, shoot, I'm a better 589 00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:26,520 Speaker 1: I'm a better fisher than you know that my boyfriend 590 00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:30,000 Speaker 1: you know, um, or you know I'm a better swimmer. 591 00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:32,840 Speaker 1: It's just something find the things that you guys don't 592 00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:36,280 Speaker 1: do and you don't do well, um and or you 593 00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:39,320 Speaker 1: don't do well and try to engage yourself in. Man. 594 00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:41,880 Speaker 1: I think they make for such an interesting day because 595 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:44,600 Speaker 1: where do we usually fall like the zone we usually 596 00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:46,680 Speaker 1: fall in, and like I want to go see a movie. Yeah, 597 00:31:46,840 --> 00:31:48,280 Speaker 1: let's go see a movie. You want to go out 598 00:31:48,320 --> 00:31:50,320 Speaker 1: and get something to eat, Let's go get out some me, 599 00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:52,080 Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Then you know, oh god, dude, 600 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:53,920 Speaker 1: it didn't it didn't it been it right? Like and 601 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:56,840 Speaker 1: after that even like yo, like what else is there 602 00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:58,960 Speaker 1: to do? You know what I mean? A great way 603 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:02,040 Speaker 1: because you guys both know you're going in there like, oh, man, 604 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:04,800 Speaker 1: I don't want to go skydive. I don't want to 605 00:32:04,800 --> 00:32:07,959 Speaker 1: go fishing. I don't want to go you know, you know, 606 00:32:08,040 --> 00:32:10,120 Speaker 1: to the back of a butcher house and you know, 607 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,560 Speaker 1: cut up neither. I don't know, like just come up 608 00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:14,640 Speaker 1: with the random stuff, you know, and make it your 609 00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:18,360 Speaker 1: own date challenge. That should be a hashtag by the way, Yeah, no, 610 00:32:18,480 --> 00:32:20,960 Speaker 1: I like that. I think that's cool. That's a great idea. 611 00:32:21,320 --> 00:32:25,680 Speaker 1: It's like taking TikTok and making it real life. Yeah, 612 00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:29,440 Speaker 1: I hope that was helpful. Yeah for sure. All right, 613 00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:40,880 Speaker 1: all right, go Boulder, Colorado. Thanks so yeah, thank you. Hey, 614 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:44,160 Speaker 1: what's going on? Kristen on Mark Barks Jerry used to 615 00:32:44,200 --> 00:32:47,080 Speaker 1: meet you guys. What you got for us? Um? I 616 00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:49,360 Speaker 1: was just kind of wondering what your opinions were on 617 00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:53,239 Speaker 1: like taking breaks in a relationship over like just like 618 00:32:53,320 --> 00:32:57,360 Speaker 1: breaking up. I guess it's a good one. I don't know. 619 00:32:57,440 --> 00:33:02,200 Speaker 1: I've never taken a break in a relationship. I don't think. Um, 620 00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,320 Speaker 1: if somebody told me they wanted to take a break, 621 00:33:04,480 --> 00:33:10,560 Speaker 1: I probably never talked to them again. I know that's 622 00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:12,760 Speaker 1: not like the nicest thing to say, and he's not 623 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,200 Speaker 1: very patient to me. But if someone said to me 624 00:33:16,360 --> 00:33:19,800 Speaker 1: they want to take a break, I mean just to 625 00:33:20,360 --> 00:33:22,560 Speaker 1: save base, I'd be like, oh, well, I wanted to 626 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,440 Speaker 1: take a break, but I wanted to be permanent. Never 627 00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:27,040 Speaker 1: talked to me again, and then I show them I'm 628 00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:30,840 Speaker 1: erasing their phone number in my phone. I uh, I've 629 00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:33,400 Speaker 1: never heard of that. I mean, I've heard of breaking up. 630 00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:37,520 Speaker 1: I've never heard of taking a break. Yeah. It's like, yeah, yeah, 631 00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,280 Speaker 1: taking a break is like the cousin of breaking up, right, 632 00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:43,240 Speaker 1: It's just it's just just like, how do you have 633 00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:44,920 Speaker 1: you ever said to someone I think we need to 634 00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:47,200 Speaker 1: take a break? No, no, no, I've never said that. 635 00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:51,240 Speaker 1: I've always been a committed dude, so I've never had that, 636 00:33:51,480 --> 00:33:53,920 Speaker 1: you know, let's take a break. But I do know 637 00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:56,400 Speaker 1: a lot of guys and a lot of women who've 638 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:59,440 Speaker 1: who've said they've taken a break, and I think it's 639 00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:02,040 Speaker 1: a past of aggressive way of saying like, I think 640 00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:04,680 Speaker 1: we need to break this up. So, um, your question 641 00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:06,920 Speaker 1: is what's the difference, or is your question is can 642 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:10,359 Speaker 1: you ever get back together? Well, I guess kind of 643 00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:13,360 Speaker 1: like back together at the same level that you were, 644 00:34:13,400 --> 00:34:16,000 Speaker 1: just because I feel like it's kind of just an excuse. 645 00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:19,719 Speaker 1: I guess on like trying to say together because I 646 00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:22,000 Speaker 1: feel like when you take a break or break up, 647 00:34:22,040 --> 00:34:24,080 Speaker 1: you're trying to work on like yourself in a relationship 648 00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:27,520 Speaker 1: and there's still like an attachment. So I guess like, 649 00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:31,320 Speaker 1: would that even be worth it or do you should 650 00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:33,719 Speaker 1: you just like break up? I guess yeah, I think 651 00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:36,359 Speaker 1: first off, taking a break and break up, let's just 652 00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:38,960 Speaker 1: let's go ahead and just merge the two together. It's 653 00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:41,000 Speaker 1: you're breaking up, right if you're taking a break your 654 00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:45,520 Speaker 1: breaking up, let's let's not, let's not you know, differentiate 655 00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:49,919 Speaker 1: the two. Um. I think what's interesting though, is when 656 00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:53,880 Speaker 1: people do break up or what it is to understand why. 657 00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:57,120 Speaker 1: And I think once you understand why and you give 658 00:34:57,160 --> 00:35:00,840 Speaker 1: that person the space to figure the it out, I 659 00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:03,200 Speaker 1: think you just have to be or the other person 660 00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:07,440 Speaker 1: has to be hopeful that the person you know will grow. 661 00:35:07,800 --> 00:35:10,400 Speaker 1: And if that growth will allow you guys to come 662 00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:15,040 Speaker 1: back together to make a better relationship, then so be it. Um, 663 00:35:15,080 --> 00:35:17,319 Speaker 1: And they might be an opportunity to for the other 664 00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:19,759 Speaker 1: party as well to grow. Like whoever decides to call 665 00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:22,239 Speaker 1: the break right there for whatever reason that they may 666 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:24,399 Speaker 1: not be able to figure out. Because here's the truth, 667 00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:26,560 Speaker 1: and here's what I know to be true, is that 668 00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:31,000 Speaker 1: the hardest person to get to know is yourself and why. 669 00:35:31,080 --> 00:35:34,879 Speaker 1: Because God gave us this thing called denial. We can 670 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:38,800 Speaker 1: deny anything about ourselves that we are not ready to face, 671 00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:42,920 Speaker 1: and so that makes it very challenging. So when you're 672 00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:47,239 Speaker 1: in a relationship and you're bringing two people together, um, 673 00:35:47,280 --> 00:35:49,920 Speaker 1: it's like uh, two bodies of water. I've been to 674 00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:53,239 Speaker 1: South Africa, and you can in South Africa, you can 675 00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:56,200 Speaker 1: see the Atlantic ocean and the mediterrane Sea kind of 676 00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:58,200 Speaker 1: come together. I think those are the two seeds that 677 00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,480 Speaker 1: that but together. And you kind to see him. You 678 00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:02,839 Speaker 1: see them kind of coming together, two bodies of water 679 00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:06,080 Speaker 1: just coming together, and there's a lot of friction and splashing, 680 00:36:06,120 --> 00:36:08,600 Speaker 1: it goes on, uh and for it to really settle 681 00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:12,319 Speaker 1: down takes time. So I say that to say it 682 00:36:12,360 --> 00:36:16,239 Speaker 1: takes time. Everybody gets their time um to shine though. 683 00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:19,960 Speaker 1: All right, So hopefully that is helpful for you that 684 00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:22,640 Speaker 1: you guys a chance to shine, even if it isn't 685 00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:27,759 Speaker 1: you guys together. So um, I hope that was helpful. Yes, 686 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:30,240 Speaker 1: it was, thank you. I just feel like like taking 687 00:36:30,280 --> 00:36:33,239 Speaker 1: a break has been way more prominent, like in like 688 00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:38,080 Speaker 1: throughout my age and even like a few of my 689 00:36:38,160 --> 00:36:41,240 Speaker 1: friends are taking a break where they're they don't consider 690 00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:44,840 Speaker 1: each other like boyfriend and girlfriend, but they still like talk. 691 00:36:45,520 --> 00:36:47,319 Speaker 1: They just don't like see each other as off. It's 692 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:52,440 Speaker 1: it's passive aggressive to be honest with you, um, and 693 00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,319 Speaker 1: this is not taking a shot at your generation, and 694 00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:57,719 Speaker 1: I apologize to putting you off. I do believe there 695 00:36:57,760 --> 00:37:02,000 Speaker 1: are some social cues and social development things that have 696 00:37:02,080 --> 00:37:05,239 Speaker 1: been um delayed a little bit because you guys have 697 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:08,799 Speaker 1: something that has been like no other generation, Like you 698 00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:12,600 Speaker 1: guys are inundated with all this other stuff from social 699 00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:15,600 Speaker 1: media and when you talk about one on one communication, 700 00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:19,080 Speaker 1: because that's something you really can't avoid. I think there's 701 00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:20,880 Speaker 1: a little bit of a step, like being able to 702 00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:23,480 Speaker 1: hold somebody accountable, like hey, look, just just tell me 703 00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:25,120 Speaker 1: how you really feel. You don't if you want to 704 00:37:25,160 --> 00:37:27,839 Speaker 1: break up right, like you said, next time somebody says 705 00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:30,319 Speaker 1: that to you, like let's take a break, Well why 706 00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:33,400 Speaker 1: not just break up and see what? Say? Like, what 707 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:35,480 Speaker 1: is the difference? Like somebody needs to tell me. That's 708 00:37:35,520 --> 00:37:38,080 Speaker 1: just we should put a question out there, like there 709 00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:40,719 Speaker 1: is no difference. I agree. I feel like it's kind 710 00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:47,600 Speaker 1: of just a way to pretend. Yeah, yeah, it's irritating. 711 00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:50,319 Speaker 1: I think that's why you're probably feeling the way you're 712 00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:53,960 Speaker 1: like what does that even mean? Like like what does 713 00:37:54,000 --> 00:38:00,279 Speaker 1: that mean? Like are we still together? Yeah? So all right, 714 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:10,520 Speaker 1: well thank you so much? Yeah, thank you. Hey who 715 00:38:10,560 --> 00:38:16,760 Speaker 1: are you? Where are you from? Hi'm Olivia from Chicago. Olivia. Hey, 716 00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:19,640 Speaker 1: So what's your question? Olivia? What you got for us? Um? 717 00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,480 Speaker 1: My question is how has the stigma in the US 718 00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:28,120 Speaker 1: surrounding therapy from men impacted your mental health. I got 719 00:38:28,120 --> 00:38:31,680 Speaker 1: a lot to say this. I let Jerry go. Um. 720 00:38:31,719 --> 00:38:37,799 Speaker 1: I uh, I had never really been to a shrink um. 721 00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:39,560 Speaker 1: And it was so funny. I worked with a guy 722 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,680 Speaker 1: I was going through something. Um, it's going through a 723 00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:45,719 Speaker 1: family issue and I was telling a coworker about it. 724 00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:49,640 Speaker 1: And my coworker said, go talk to my shrink. And 725 00:38:50,960 --> 00:38:53,799 Speaker 1: I was like why and he was like, just go 726 00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:56,319 Speaker 1: talk to my shrink. And it was really helpful. It 727 00:38:56,440 --> 00:39:00,880 Speaker 1: was really so it was just um, so funny. I mean, 728 00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:03,319 Speaker 1: I didn't ever I guess I had to think about it. 729 00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,000 Speaker 1: I just I didn't even think of it as an option, 730 00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:10,920 Speaker 1: you know, I didn't think I I I wasn't. I 731 00:39:10,960 --> 00:39:13,000 Speaker 1: didn't know at the time that just because you were 732 00:39:13,239 --> 00:39:16,480 Speaker 1: feeling squirrelly inside about a family issue, that that is 733 00:39:16,640 --> 00:39:19,799 Speaker 1: like my mental health had to be addressed, you know, 734 00:39:20,040 --> 00:39:22,960 Speaker 1: and it was because of something outside that was happening 735 00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:26,080 Speaker 1: to me. It was you know, I thought you saw 736 00:39:26,120 --> 00:39:29,520 Speaker 1: a shrink for I didn't even put that together that 737 00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:32,440 Speaker 1: that's why you see a shrink. So um. I mean, 738 00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:36,279 Speaker 1: I'm I'm I'm all for seeking seeking help if you're 739 00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:40,200 Speaker 1: going through something. Yeah, I am too. Olivia. I'm I'm 740 00:39:40,239 --> 00:39:42,920 Speaker 1: all for getting help, and I think what's challenging is 741 00:39:43,000 --> 00:39:46,240 Speaker 1: that I still believe that we live in a society where, 742 00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:51,960 Speaker 1: you know that men still don't get the um, the 743 00:39:52,120 --> 00:39:55,719 Speaker 1: attention they need for when it comes to mental health. Well, 744 00:39:55,840 --> 00:40:01,080 Speaker 1: thank you, guys, thank you. But Jocelyn, who are you 745 00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:03,840 Speaker 1: and where are you from? My name is Jocelyn and 746 00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:07,320 Speaker 1: I'm from New York. Okay, all right, what's up? Jocelyn 747 00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:11,280 Speaker 1: from New York East Coast in the house. What's your question? 748 00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:13,640 Speaker 1: So my question for you is what are the go 749 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:18,480 Speaker 1: to signs to expect when a guy likes you? So funny? 750 00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:22,080 Speaker 1: I have I have. I have two twelve year old 751 00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:26,480 Speaker 1: daughters and they're just like getting into the rituals of humans. 752 00:40:28,120 --> 00:40:37,480 Speaker 1: And there's a there's a boy in my daughter's class, 753 00:40:37,960 --> 00:40:42,839 Speaker 1: and I mean, this is pretty on the nose, but 754 00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:46,200 Speaker 1: she said she catches him like staring, staring at her 755 00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:49,799 Speaker 1: and everything. I mean, that's something, you know, throwing a 756 00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:54,879 Speaker 1: look back and you know, making sure you're being paid 757 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:58,600 Speaker 1: attention to you know. Um, it's so funny. I'm really 758 00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:01,840 Speaker 1: I need a little more time because my daughters are twelves, 759 00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:05,279 Speaker 1: so they're just entering it. But it's really fascinating to 760 00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:10,040 Speaker 1: sort of give like advice to my daughter's Like, you know, 761 00:41:10,600 --> 00:41:12,960 Speaker 1: there was a guy that one of my daughters liked, 762 00:41:13,160 --> 00:41:17,920 Speaker 1: and he was seen holding hands with another girl, and 763 00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:22,399 Speaker 1: I told my daughter, like, um, you've got to move 764 00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:24,279 Speaker 1: on from it, you know what I'm saying, Like, you 765 00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:27,440 Speaker 1: can't obsess on that one. That one's gone. And then 766 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:30,839 Speaker 1: that person actually came around and was the one who 767 00:41:30,880 --> 00:41:33,160 Speaker 1: was looking at my daughter, you know what I'm saying. 768 00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:36,839 Speaker 1: So it's it's so funny just and this is just 769 00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:40,480 Speaker 1: in the beginning of of my kids entering the I 770 00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:43,040 Speaker 1: can't believe I was saying this dating world but like 771 00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:47,520 Speaker 1: not putting all your eggs in one basket, not taking 772 00:41:47,520 --> 00:41:51,960 Speaker 1: anything too seriously and being able to adapt and like 773 00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:55,600 Speaker 1: move on. I had to tell you, Um, one of 774 00:41:55,640 --> 00:42:00,600 Speaker 1: my best relationships was, um, I need to go out 775 00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:04,359 Speaker 1: with a particular marriage prior to marriage, one of one 776 00:42:04,360 --> 00:42:07,919 Speaker 1: of my best one of my most successful dating relationships 777 00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:09,960 Speaker 1: not married. Obviously, my most successful is the one I 778 00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:15,040 Speaker 1: got married Levy Hunting. Um, But um was I wanted 779 00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:18,040 Speaker 1: to go out with a person and that person was 780 00:42:18,080 --> 00:42:20,240 Speaker 1: not interested in me at all. It's just not interested 781 00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:22,000 Speaker 1: me at all, and it was obvious. We all went 782 00:42:22,040 --> 00:42:26,120 Speaker 1: to a party, a group of us, UM and her 783 00:42:26,160 --> 00:42:33,360 Speaker 1: best friend. UM I started talking to because this person 784 00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:35,120 Speaker 1: I was interested in was just not interested in me. 785 00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:38,560 Speaker 1: She was interested in someone else, and oh man, it 786 00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:40,839 Speaker 1: was We had such a I ended up dating her 787 00:42:40,880 --> 00:42:43,720 Speaker 1: friend and we had such a fun relationship. I am 788 00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:47,560 Speaker 1: really nice, really fun, and it would have never happened 789 00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:49,400 Speaker 1: if I had not been like open to the universe. 790 00:42:51,560 --> 00:42:53,520 Speaker 1: You're trying to figure out that sign. Is there somebody 791 00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:55,239 Speaker 1: out there that you think likes you, and you're trying 792 00:42:55,239 --> 00:42:58,120 Speaker 1: to figure out if they like You're not like a 793 00:42:58,160 --> 00:43:02,360 Speaker 1: lot NonStop texting, liking of random photos years ago, you 794 00:43:02,400 --> 00:43:07,440 Speaker 1: know phasics. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess something like that. Okay, 795 00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:12,440 Speaker 1: how old are you? Okay, twenty one? So Jerry just 796 00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:17,480 Speaker 1: actually hinted on something. If this person that you know 797 00:43:17,840 --> 00:43:20,200 Speaker 1: and you think this person might a great way to 798 00:43:20,239 --> 00:43:23,440 Speaker 1: do is go to some of your oldest photos. UM, 799 00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:25,680 Speaker 1: I have a twenty one year old or twenty year 800 00:43:25,680 --> 00:43:29,960 Speaker 1: old one. UM and uh, he will you know, when 801 00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:32,080 Speaker 1: we're talking about the girls that he likes and stuff 802 00:43:32,080 --> 00:43:35,279 Speaker 1: like that. But he wants to be incognito because the 803 00:43:35,320 --> 00:43:38,120 Speaker 1: old school was, you know, like doing how gosh am 804 00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:40,400 Speaker 1: I that guy? Now I'm that guy old school? Um, 805 00:43:40,640 --> 00:43:44,360 Speaker 1: but you try to pretend like you know she she 806 00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,640 Speaker 1: ain't that I'm not. I'm not even gonna you know, 807 00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,920 Speaker 1: they used to say this word jockey. I'm not going jocker, 808 00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:51,040 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I'm just I'm just gonna 809 00:43:51,080 --> 00:43:53,920 Speaker 1: be cool and just be but always visible so you 810 00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:57,240 Speaker 1: see me and you know I'm right there. Well. The 811 00:43:57,239 --> 00:44:00,120 Speaker 1: the Internet or the social media version of that is 812 00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:03,880 Speaker 1: liking some of the older photos just to kind of 813 00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:07,879 Speaker 1: pin you, like, why is this photo from three years ago? 814 00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:11,439 Speaker 1: Being like who goes down that far right? So then 815 00:44:11,520 --> 00:44:14,280 Speaker 1: you know you've gotta sign like, yo, you just started 816 00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:17,200 Speaker 1: following me last week and you're all the way down 817 00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:20,640 Speaker 1: four years like you're really letting me know that you 818 00:44:20,719 --> 00:44:25,040 Speaker 1: like me. The more aggressive version is I'm going to 819 00:44:25,200 --> 00:44:28,319 Speaker 1: like a thousand of your photos and you'd be like, yo, 820 00:44:28,440 --> 00:44:31,759 Speaker 1: you just you all up in my lights, right, But 821 00:44:31,880 --> 00:44:35,920 Speaker 1: it ain't set me one comment or d M right. Um. 822 00:44:35,960 --> 00:44:38,640 Speaker 1: But yeah, you know what I look for the you know, 823 00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:41,200 Speaker 1: the licking of lips, you know, I look for the 824 00:44:41,239 --> 00:44:45,520 Speaker 1: unnecessary cool swaying like like you know there's that you 825 00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:47,640 Speaker 1: know that just like what what what are you doing? Why? 826 00:44:47,640 --> 00:44:50,320 Speaker 1: Why are you cool? Swaying? This is like that cool swam, 827 00:44:50,440 --> 00:44:52,560 Speaker 1: I'm just cool. That's when you know you might want 828 00:44:52,560 --> 00:44:54,919 Speaker 1: to say hello, but it's a good thing. It's like, hey, 829 00:44:54,920 --> 00:44:57,640 Speaker 1: what you doing? If you really want to know, just like, hey, 830 00:44:57,680 --> 00:45:00,959 Speaker 1: what you doing? Like you gotta like softly tough because 831 00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:02,840 Speaker 1: he doesn't want to seem too aggressive because there are 832 00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:04,880 Speaker 1: a lot of guys and trust me, I talked to 833 00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,520 Speaker 1: a lot of my son's friends. A lot of young 834 00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:09,839 Speaker 1: boys are afraid now because of all the stuff that's 835 00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:12,319 Speaker 1: been happening in the news and stuff, so they don't 836 00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:14,920 Speaker 1: want to be seen as creepy. So you have a 837 00:45:14,960 --> 00:45:19,000 Speaker 1: lot more of them being less of forward and just 838 00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:22,359 Speaker 1: trying to say hey. So a great way to tap in, 839 00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:25,399 Speaker 1: especially if you like that person, just give like a 840 00:45:25,440 --> 00:45:28,200 Speaker 1: soft invite, like a soft like I see you, I 841 00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:30,480 Speaker 1: recognize you. And that way you don't put yourself out 842 00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:32,879 Speaker 1: there too, right, so you're kind of protected, like hey, 843 00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:35,240 Speaker 1: what you doing? Which way are you going? Like oh wow? 844 00:45:35,360 --> 00:45:36,839 Speaker 1: And then see if something you know what I mean, 845 00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:39,040 Speaker 1: it's like, um, I'm about to go to Starbuns. You 846 00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:41,920 Speaker 1: want you want anything, you know what I mean, something 847 00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:43,600 Speaker 1: like that, and then that's how you know you know 848 00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:45,360 Speaker 1: what I mean. Then you're like, all right if you 849 00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:49,719 Speaker 1: see them fidgeting and you know, nervous and all right 850 00:45:49,880 --> 00:45:52,399 Speaker 1: when they pick up their phone for no reason. Yeah, 851 00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:56,080 Speaker 1: you like me, You like me, all right. So hopefully 852 00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:58,040 Speaker 1: that's helpful. I try to give you a little bit 853 00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:00,440 Speaker 1: of the new school and the old school and hopefully 854 00:46:00,440 --> 00:46:02,600 Speaker 1: you've got a good mixed there. And Jerry could you know, 855 00:46:02,640 --> 00:46:05,920 Speaker 1: through his experience, kind of helped you out with that. Totally. 856 00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:09,319 Speaker 1: Thank you guys so much. Well, that was fun. That 857 00:46:09,480 --> 00:46:12,000 Speaker 1: was really cool. That was really I think we give 858 00:46:12,080 --> 00:46:16,040 Speaker 1: some good advice, sage advice. We're like the elders helping 859 00:46:16,120 --> 00:46:18,640 Speaker 1: up kids. I'm not ready to be the elder statesman 860 00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:20,839 Speaker 1: in this, I'm not. I'm not. I don't think I'm ready. 861 00:46:20,880 --> 00:46:23,399 Speaker 1: We are, We're like the elder is helping them out. Well, 862 00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:26,440 Speaker 1: this is cool. I hope that is insightful. Yeah, I 863 00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:29,000 Speaker 1: hope it was insightful. This is really cool for us 864 00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:30,680 Speaker 1: to be in this space and to be able to 865 00:46:30,719 --> 00:46:34,759 Speaker 1: have this conversation. Uh, this was how men think. With 866 00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:38,839 Speaker 1: Jerry O'Connell and myself barbar should be the mill. G 867 00:46:39,040 --> 00:46:44,239 Speaker 1: B A j A yep, keep going, b I A yep. 868 00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:49,120 Speaker 1: M I l A again Honorary Nigerian for the Day. 869 00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:53,239 Speaker 1: Thank you guys, thanks for listening to How Men Think 870 00:46:53,800 --> 00:46:56,360 Speaker 1: and I Heart Radio London Audio Production