Speaker 1: Welcome to How the Money. I'm Joel and I am Matt,
Speaker 1: and today we're discussing using financial stress to your advantage. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean financial stress, or honestly stress in general. I
Speaker 1: think that that's something that most people are going to think,
Speaker 1: just right off the bat, that is something that they
Speaker 1: want to avoid. Right. It's it's almost like if you
Speaker 1: get sick, it's like it is getting sick ever a
Speaker 1: good thing. It's something that you pretty much want to
Speaker 1: always make sure that doesn't happen to you. But during
Speaker 1: this episode, man, we're gonna talk about stress in a way,
Speaker 1: uh and specifically stress when it comes to our money.
Speaker 1: And you know, obviously there's the obvious kind of downsize
Speaker 1: to it, but we're gonna talk about the upsides, the
Speaker 1: upshots to financial stress and how we can use it
Speaker 1: to further us along down our path of personal using
Speaker 1: something that's commonly perceived to be negative as an advantage.
Speaker 1: I like that we're gonna talk about that today. But
Speaker 1: before we get to that, man, I want to mention
Speaker 1: that my wife just bought a smart watch. Oh your wife,
Speaker 1: did you had like this cheapo watch on here in
Speaker 1: the notes? And I thought maybe you got a new
Speaker 1: one now, so I think I've we we've talked before,
Speaker 1: how I am kind of against the smart watch, at
Speaker 1: least for myself in my own life on my wrist.
Speaker 1: I don't really want another screen to be checking, although
Speaker 1: some people have actually said that having a smart watch
Speaker 1: actually means you check your phone less often because you
Speaker 1: can like quickly glance at your watch and then you're
Speaker 1: done with it. But it's still a screen, Yeah, and
Speaker 1: you're still being distracted from whatever you're doing. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: with you. So I'm gonna avoid it for the time being.
Speaker 1: But my wife, she said, well, she she she started
Speaker 1: doing some research and she was just interested in potentially
Speaker 1: getting a smart watch. You know, the name brand ones.
Speaker 1: They're kind of expensive and right, yeah, something like that
Speaker 1: Apple watch whatever. I think so, and you know, she's
Speaker 1: gotten Android, so I don't even think those play nicely together.
Speaker 1: Something that was even a possibility. She's got to get
Speaker 1: that Samsung on her wrist. I think she would have. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she'd have to get one of the andwer watches, like
Speaker 1: Google makes one, Samsung makes one. But it turns out
Speaker 1: that there are a lot of like non name brand
Speaker 1: smart watches out there now. Too, and the technology has
Speaker 1: gotten a whole lot better at the cheap end of
Speaker 1: the spectro and so yeah, so she got a one
Speaker 1: off Amazon. I'll link to the one that she purchased
Speaker 1: in the show notes. But she's loving it because some
Speaker 1: of the I think additional benefits of having one of
Speaker 1: the really nice name brand ones she doesn't care about.
Speaker 1: She really wants this to track steps, heart rate, monitor
Speaker 1: her sleep and it has a lot of those those functions.
Speaker 1: She can retext on it too. Um. And so yeah,
Speaker 1: there's another watch. I forget what the name brand of
Speaker 1: hers is. Again, I said, well, we'll link to in
Speaker 1: the show notes. But Wise is another brand we've talked about. Wise.
Speaker 1: They've got some cool stuff, like some cool cheap headphones,
Speaker 1: so um, you know, they do home security incredibly cheap.
Speaker 1: Instead of getting the Nest came or some of the
Speaker 1: different camera setups in your home that typically costs like
Speaker 1: like a hundred two hundred bucks for these cameras. Wise, Man,
Speaker 1: those cameras are bucks. You actually and me onto them
Speaker 1: last year. Yeah, so so those are great. By the way,
Speaker 1: it's spelled w y z E and you Well, we'll
Speaker 1: link to wis is in the show notes as well.
Speaker 1: But yeah, the cool thing is that she didn't have
Speaker 1: to spend very much and it's got the functionality she's
Speaker 1: looking for. And I think sometimes we just assume that
Speaker 1: we need the top of the line or the brand
Speaker 1: new thing that cost three dollars in order to be happy,
Speaker 1: in order to get the things we need. And Emily
Speaker 1: was like, well, what am I looking for? Let me
Speaker 1: read the reviews, let me, you know, sort through a
Speaker 1: bunch of different watches and find one that is relatively
Speaker 1: inexpensive that's gonna have the functionality that I actually need,
Speaker 1: not all the stuff that I don't. Um. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: we'll see how long at last, you know, smart watch
Speaker 1: might last for a year, may not last very long,
Speaker 1: maybe not even that long. We'll put it on the calendar.
Speaker 1: Maybe a year from now, we'll check back in and
Speaker 1: maybe Emily can come on give us her little smart
Speaker 1: watch update. But but dude, I'm with you. So the
Speaker 1: only thing that I feel like I've ever considered getting
Speaker 1: a smart watch for is I've heard that you can like,
Speaker 1: they buzz, like, they can vibrate, and I would love
Speaker 1: a solution where I could have an alarm set specifically
Speaker 1: in the morning so that when I wake up, it
Speaker 1: doesn't wake up eat because in order for it to
Speaker 1: be loud enough for me to hear, it's oftentimes, you know,
Speaker 1: loud enough for her to hear as well, and she
Speaker 1: kind of hates that. I try to get up super quietly.
Speaker 1: But if I just had a little smart watch on
Speaker 1: my wrist and it buzz and that, you know, that's
Speaker 1: how I was able to wake up, I think that
Speaker 1: could be. That could be pretty cool. Can I tell
Speaker 1: you the number one feature of this watch that she
Speaker 1: got though? What So she's constantly misplacing her phone and
Speaker 1: she's always asking me to call her phone so she
Speaker 1: can find it. This smart watch has like a locate
Speaker 1: my phone feature. So dude, my life has already gotten
Speaker 1: way better because she watch. Well, I mean even iPhones
Speaker 1: are I feel like most phones have that feature. But
Speaker 1: you just said, I mean, you have to sit down
Speaker 1: at a computer log in that wet whereas I guess
Speaker 1: with that watch is just already on her. She just
Speaker 1: pushes a button exactly kind of like beeps off in
Speaker 1: the distance. It's made us both much happier night. But yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, Matt, let's mentioned the beer that we're having
Speaker 1: on today's show. This one is from Bolero Snort Brewery.
Speaker 1: It's called a mouhito. It's a logger with lime juice
Speaker 1: and mint. We'll give our thoughts on this one at
Speaker 1: the end of the episode. This was a brewer out
Speaker 1: of New Jersey. I had never heard of before. It
Speaker 1: just kind of picked it up on a whim. I
Speaker 1: just noticed that it's a Mouhito, not Mohito. They've got
Speaker 1: a little cow cattle theme going on, I guess with
Speaker 1: their brewery. But yeah, man, looking forward to enjoying this
Speaker 1: one and sharing our thoughts at the end of the episode.
Speaker 1: For now, let's get onto the topic of hand. We
Speaker 1: are talking about how you can use financial stress to
Speaker 1: your advantage. And Matt, I know you've never done this.
Speaker 1: Have you ever said anything really dumb? Yes? But I
Speaker 1: am doing it less and less as good as I age.
Speaker 1: I'm getting wiser. Well. I think like I've definitely said
Speaker 1: a lot of dumb things. One because I just have
Speaker 1: this propensity to talk, and I think when you talk more,
Speaker 1: you say more dumb things. If I shot my mouth
Speaker 1: a little more, I probably would say fewer, But then
Speaker 1: I sometimes make it worse because I try to explain,
Speaker 1: you know, where I was coming from, and then people
Speaker 1: are like, that doesn't make it any better, and they're
Speaker 1: just give me a little little confused. I think we've
Speaker 1: all been there, right, we all had that kind of
Speaker 1: like foot in the mouth moment, like, oh, man, if
Speaker 1: I just shut up five minutes ago, I'd be in
Speaker 1: a much better spot with this person, in this situation. Whatever.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe it was like to a teacher after you
Speaker 1: got a bad grade on a test and you somehow
Speaker 1: talk to yourself into a d from us, you know,
Speaker 1: like because that's how bad it went. Um. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I think if we had just stopped at the first
Speaker 1: idiotic thing, it would have turned out better for us
Speaker 1: and humans, Matt, We're anxious creatures and money is one
Speaker 1: of the most stressful topics we face. That's why we
Speaker 1: wanted to talk about this today. It's not always a
Speaker 1: poor money decision that leads to uh significantly higher stress levels.
Speaker 1: Often it's the reaction that we have when we mess
Speaker 1: up that creates these compounding effects that creates more stress
Speaker 1: in our lives. And so, yeah, we want to talk about,
Speaker 1: like how do we eliminate stress or mitigate stress in
Speaker 1: our lives? And then also maybe in some ways use
Speaker 1: that stress to our advantage in the future. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: and of course, you know, it's important to note that
Speaker 1: stress does have some positive benefit in our lives. You know,
Speaker 1: it doesn't exist for no reason. But it's crucial for
Speaker 1: us to make some changes though, so that you know,
Speaker 1: our anxiety over money, that it doesn't cause us to
Speaker 1: curl up into a ball unable to take any positive
Speaker 1: steps that can help us to move in the right direction.
Speaker 1: This is idle in order to you know, keep it
Speaker 1: from becoming a full blown personal crisis. And of course,
Speaker 1: you know, in the last fifteen months they have been
Speaker 1: especially stressful. But even before the pandemic, we saw that
Speaker 1: Northwestern Mutual they actually did a study back in sixteen
Speaker 1: and they found that a five percent of Americans feel
Speaker 1: anxious about their finances. And the American Institute of Stress,
Speaker 1: which is I gotta imagine that's an interesting place to work.
Speaker 1: It's either the chilliest or the most stressful place to work.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure it's on how they tackler the stress,
Speaker 1: but they say that the number two cause of stress
Speaker 1: in America is you guessed it, money At it's it
Speaker 1: was actually just one percent point behind something, uh, you know,
Speaker 1: really minor. The future of our nation work comes in
Speaker 1: at number three after that. But it's worth pointing out
Speaker 1: that a lot of folks are dealing with some amount
Speaker 1: of financial stress. We want you to know that you're
Speaker 1: not alone. Yeah, obviously it plagues a huge amount of people,
Speaker 1: and Matt, I think we already know this. So we're
Speaker 1: gonna talking about some of the positive benefits of financial
Speaker 1: stress in your life. I know, actually there are there
Speaker 1: are some. It sounds counterintuitive, but also talk about how
Speaker 1: stress can be bad, right, and people probably already know
Speaker 1: some of this stuff, but there's but this, this here
Speaker 1: is a little reminder, right that overwhelming amounts of stress
Speaker 1: can have a massive negative impact on our health and
Speaker 1: on our relationships. That stress can lead to things like
Speaker 1: cardiovascular disease, ulcers, and worse and unmanageable. Stress takes a
Speaker 1: toll on the physical body as well. Not I even
Speaker 1: saw a recent study that found that overworked individuals are
Speaker 1: more stressed and it leads to a lot of premature
Speaker 1: deaths in our country. So, yeah, the negative realities of
Speaker 1: stress are real. It takes a toll on us, but
Speaker 1: it also takes a toll on our relationships. When we're
Speaker 1: overly stressed about anything we're we're more likely to take
Speaker 1: it out on the people that we love the most,
Speaker 1: and that leads to like messed up relationships and in
Speaker 1: many cases, consistent money stress can rek havoc on a marriage.
Speaker 1: Money fights are the second leading cause of divorce, and
Speaker 1: almost half of couples that have fifty dollars or more
Speaker 1: in consumer debt say that money is the leading cause
Speaker 1: of arguments in their homes. That's a big deal. Stress
Speaker 1: is obviously causing a lot of strife for a lot
Speaker 1: of people. Yeah, that's right, And you know, the reactions
Speaker 1: that we have to the stressors in our lives can
Speaker 1: just make things worse. According to the American Psychological Association,
Speaker 1: the top stress relieving activities are watching TV for over
Speaker 1: two hours, uh, serving the Internet, napping, eating, drinking, and smoking.
Speaker 1: Uh So, you know, basically, it's just a laundry list
Speaker 1: of things that might be okay and and you know,
Speaker 1: in extreme moderation, maybe maybe not the smoking because that's
Speaker 1: never actually a good thing, But the rest of them
Speaker 1: are okay in moderation. But we're over indulging in all
Speaker 1: of them because Americans are just so stressed out, and
Speaker 1: so money troubles are a big part of what gets
Speaker 1: us to that point where we feel like we need
Speaker 1: these different coping mechanisms. Yeah, it's like, um, so stressed out,
Speaker 1: the only thing I can think of doing is popping
Speaker 1: in the couch and watching two and a half hours
Speaker 1: of Netflix, right, which is essentially ignoring the stress, right,
Speaker 1: Like you're you're basically running from it. You're you're not
Speaker 1: facing the problems and instead you're just pretending that it
Speaker 1: doesn't exist, which, um only makes the problem worse in
Speaker 1: almost every case. And we've talked about this as well before.
Speaker 1: But sometimes we spend too much money because we're stressed out,
Speaker 1: and spending spreeze, you know, or retail therapy is what
Speaker 1: it's sometimes called, can be an attempt to basically wallpaper
Speaker 1: over the emotions that we're feeling. But that also makes
Speaker 1: things worse. Right. Some folks actually at Duke University, they
Speaker 1: found what they do, they do a lot of great
Speaker 1: like behavioral money work there. They found that instead of
Speaker 1: stress spending, people should instead try stress saving. And that
Speaker 1: feels that, Yeah, I can get behind that too, but
Speaker 1: I'm sure a lot of a lot of people listening
Speaker 1: are like that, yeah, that what does that do for?
Speaker 1: Yeah it sounds great, but that doesn't actually relieve stress.
Speaker 1: And you know, I can understand why you might respond
Speaker 1: that way. But but but the interesting thing is what they
Speaker 1: got to the root of is that spending it actually
Speaker 1: puts you in a worse hole. Right, But the behavioral
Speaker 1: final folks are Dukes said that the main benefit we
Speaker 1: get from the act of spending is the act of
Speaker 1: actually making a decision, picking something out, buying it. Boom,
Speaker 1: it's on our the way to our house. Basically like
Speaker 1: the autonomy you have over your life. Yeah. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: the part of spending that feels good. It's not necessarily
Speaker 1: even getting the item right. And so their solution was
Speaker 1: to say that instead of purchasing that item, transfer that
Speaker 1: exact amount of money to your savings. It gives you
Speaker 1: the same satisfaction but benefits you obviously in a more
Speaker 1: positive way, and your money going to Amazon or some
Speaker 1: other you know, online retailer. That money is going into
Speaker 1: your savings account, but you're actually physically doing something, You're
Speaker 1: taking an action. And so yeah, if if Duke and
Speaker 1: how the money can combine efforts and make stress saving
Speaker 1: a thing. I think that'd be awesome. Yeah, so that's
Speaker 1: a nice little action step. A little takeaway early in
Speaker 1: the episode, which doesn't always happen, how the money. But
Speaker 1: you know, all of these things are all the traditionally
Speaker 1: negative views towards stress, right, Like, we we don't want
Speaker 1: you to be overwhelmed and stressed out, and definitely not
Speaker 1: because of money issues. But we think that there's actually
Speaker 1: a much better way to view the stress in our lives.
Speaker 1: You know, we think that you can actually put stress
Speaker 1: in a positive light. Uh, maybe it's less about conquering
Speaker 1: and combating stress, right, it's not something that we're just
Speaker 1: trying to overcome. What if you're able to discover how
Speaker 1: stress will allow you to get ahead with your money
Speaker 1: and so we'll talk more about that right after this break.
Speaker 1: All right, now, let's get to kind of some of
Speaker 1: the heart of what we wanted to cover on this episode.
Speaker 1: Le taking into the meat. Yeah, let's talk about stress
Speaker 1: and how it can actually be good and benefit you potentially.
Speaker 1: Um So, yeah, before we talked about how you respond
Speaker 1: when financial stress hits. We're gonna kind of get some
Speaker 1: practical steps on that later. It's important to point out
Speaker 1: that stress isn't an inherently terrible thing. Like when we're stressed,
Speaker 1: the purpose of the physiological response of our body is
Speaker 1: to overcome whatever obstacles might be in our way. Ourselves
Speaker 1: are releasing dopamine and adrenaline so that we actually have
Speaker 1: a boost of energy and alertness. And this is like
Speaker 1: the fight or flight response we all learned about an
Speaker 1: elementary school, right, And it's like when when someone challenges
Speaker 1: you to a fight, either like you get so pumped
Speaker 1: up you punch them in the nose, or you run away.
Speaker 1: I usually ran away. You gets bumps and said, all
Speaker 1: the hair on your arm stands on end. Yep, it
Speaker 1: makes you look bigger. I still ran away. That's always
Speaker 1: how I handled I fight's growing up and still to
Speaker 1: this day. But they happened, Um, they never really happened
Speaker 1: growing up either, Let's be honest. But yeah, this is
Speaker 1: like how our bodies naturally respond to conflict, and really
Speaker 1: what we want to talk about in this episodes. How
Speaker 1: do we use that response, that physiological response when it
Speaker 1: comes to how stress impacts our lives. How do we
Speaker 1: use that not to our detriment, not to curl up
Speaker 1: in a ball, but actually to use it to our advantage. Yes,
Speaker 1: and so maybe it's not overcoming financial stress, but maybe
Speaker 1: it's more utilizing stress to overcome financial obstacles. Right. It's
Speaker 1: sort of like Judo, you know, like the martial arts, right.
Speaker 1: I heard about it. Never did it karate though, for
Speaker 1: like I don't know, maybe three months and it still
Speaker 1: didn't serve you. Well, I guess in those little on
Speaker 1: this playground scuffles, didn't know I broke one board though,
Speaker 1: that's my claim to fame. I still wanted to do
Speaker 1: that as a kid, you know, like you'd see kids
Speaker 1: on TV swear they get special boards for weak kids,
Speaker 1: like they do. But okay, so it's like Judo, right,
Speaker 1: and so if we can use the momentum and weight
Speaker 1: of stress that we encounter against the negative and the
Speaker 1: more unhealthy behaviors that were that were tempted to adopt,
Speaker 1: then we will be able to see incredible growth in
Speaker 1: our lives. Uh. And so kind of like extending that
Speaker 1: metaphor as we think of our bodies. You know what
Speaker 1: happens when you lift weights or you work out that resistance,
Speaker 1: say of a kettle bell like that right there? That
Speaker 1: is stress, but the same stress is actually what causes
Speaker 1: our muscles to grow, and so we wanted to mention
Speaker 1: this because the proper amount of stress in our lives
Speaker 1: makes us stronger in the same thing is also true
Speaker 1: of our finances. Yeah, man, especially like when when we
Speaker 1: think back to the periods in our life when we
Speaker 1: were performing at the highest levels, like we can probably
Speaker 1: bet that there was some amount of stress in our lives. Um,
Speaker 1: And I think I think back to school, right, I
Speaker 1: remember doing a couple of overnighters, and like I didn't
Speaker 1: realize how many books I could read and maybe how
Speaker 1: much and how much information I can remember eyes until
Speaker 1: getting that great and graduating, maybe what was dependent on it.
Speaker 1: Like I almost needed that challenge like that, I'm a
Speaker 1: I'm a procrastinator to the core, and so I needed
Speaker 1: to be kind of like pushed up against the wall
Speaker 1: in order to like you know, give my stress levels
Speaker 1: raised so that I could react accordingly. Yeah, I felt
Speaker 1: that way when it came to a scholarship. I mean
Speaker 1: I was getting ready to lose a big scholarship, and man,
Speaker 1: talk about me buckling down and actually getting the grades
Speaker 1: I needed to when money was on the line. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I studied. Yeah, and like I think to other people,
Speaker 1: maybe they never knew just how creative they could be
Speaker 1: until a project at work, let's say, for instance, required
Speaker 1: a completely different way of viewing the problem. And then
Speaker 1: when it comes to our finances, a lot of people
Speaker 1: probably never realized how little money they could live on
Speaker 1: until they lost a job they were out of work,
Speaker 1: or maybe they never realized how much they could earn
Speaker 1: until they had set a goal to save up a
Speaker 1: down payment on a house and they're like, I really
Speaker 1: want to do that in the next two years. I've
Speaker 1: got to earn more money to get there, all right,
Speaker 1: How am I gonna make this happen? Um? And So
Speaker 1: I think sometimes you have those stressful situations, they create
Speaker 1: the ability in us that otherwise, if we're just kind
Speaker 1: of hanging out at a more relaxed pace, we're not
Speaker 1: forced to get creative. We're not forced to work harder,
Speaker 1: you know, we're not forced to think about things differently.
Speaker 1: And it's not that stress is always good, but that
Speaker 1: kind of stress can be a huge motivator. Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: I think it's a good thing because it shows us
Speaker 1: that we care, right, It's something that we're connected to
Speaker 1: because if we didn't feel stressed towards something that, you
Speaker 1: know that was kind of pushing up in our lives. Well,
Speaker 1: that just means we're kind of apathetic to whatever that
Speaker 1: thing is. And so I think I see it as
Speaker 1: a healthy amount of concern, right, Like that's kind of
Speaker 1: how we're trying to view stress here. We're trying to
Speaker 1: view it through that lens. But of course, you know,
Speaker 1: it's important to point out that, like we're making an
Speaker 1: argument here that a proper amount of stress in our lives,
Speaker 1: in healthy doses like that is beneficial. You know, Like
Speaker 1: it kind of makes me think of just kind of
Speaker 1: like filling up your cup at the sink, getting some water,
Speaker 1: just a little bit of you know, some of that water,
Speaker 1: a little bit of stress in our lives. It can
Speaker 1: I think it can go a long way. Uh. That's
Speaker 1: a lot different than trying to like drink from a
Speaker 1: fire hydrant. Right. It's hard to grow and to make
Speaker 1: progress with our money when we're constantly facing just an
Speaker 1: overwhelming barrage of financial stressors in our life. But please
Speaker 1: please tell me you've never tried to drink from a
Speaker 1: fire now, but you've heard people talking about, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: just wonder if someone's actually trying just too much um
Speaker 1: like it's so for instance, like we don't want someone
Speaker 1: in a vicious cycle of only paying the minimums on
Speaker 1: their credit cards because you've got too many financial obligations
Speaker 1: like this would be an instance of bad stress that
Speaker 1: leads to poor decisions and outcomes. Earlier, Joe, before the break,
Speaker 1: you talked about couples who when faced with constant stress
Speaker 1: in their lives, how that can lead to the relationship
Speaker 1: uh suffering. We think that with the right amount of
Speaker 1: stress that you would be amazed at the amount of
Speaker 1: work that you'd be able to get done, like specifically
Speaker 1: with like with a couple right where you know you
Speaker 1: got your partner when you feel a little bit of
Speaker 1: stress and you both are on board, and it forces
Speaker 1: you to talk about say your your money that I
Speaker 1: don't think you can help but to be more efficient,
Speaker 1: to spend wisely with your dollars, or to you know,
Speaker 1: to start earning more money. But if the stress is
Speaker 1: too much and it's constant, that's when it can be
Speaker 1: negative in our lives. And that's when when I think
Speaker 1: it can often lead us to take some of those
Speaker 1: unhealthy behaviors and where we resort to some of those
Speaker 1: vices as we're trying to escape that stress. Yeah, letting
Speaker 1: that stress overwhelm you is the worst place you can
Speaker 1: find yourself, really and and so so, Matt, I think
Speaker 1: you know, we've we've kind of tried to reframe how
Speaker 1: we view financial stress in our lives, at least to
Speaker 1: a certain degree, that it's not all negative. Some of
Speaker 1: it can be good. It can actually cause us to
Speaker 1: rise to new heights. And it's important to recognize how
Speaker 1: that stress is going to allow us to achieve financial
Speaker 1: goals that we've set for ourselves. Right, And it's really
Speaker 1: helpful to focus on the positive goals instead of only
Speaker 1: focusing on the negative, stressful steps that might take to
Speaker 1: get there. Right. For for example, it might be difficult
Speaker 1: to constantly be saying to yourself, don't spend too much
Speaker 1: money on the credit cards this month, um, when instead
Speaker 1: maybe we should be focusing on why we're wanting to
Speaker 1: slim down the budget in the first place. Maybe it's
Speaker 1: two for the first time, have a decent working emergency fund,
Speaker 1: that financial margin, that breathing room that's so important, right,
Speaker 1: Or it's this goal to finally be able to take
Speaker 1: a vacation. Maybe it's been a few years. Um, it's
Speaker 1: probably been at least a year for for all of us.
Speaker 1: But yeah, like that, that's a great goal for a
Speaker 1: lot of people who who may be saying, I need
Speaker 1: to save up two thousand dollars to take a vacation
Speaker 1: this year, but it's been so hard in years past,
Speaker 1: and our family we really really need it. Been focusing
Speaker 1: on that goal first, the end goal, instead of all
Speaker 1: the little things it's going to take to get there
Speaker 1: at the beginning at least reframes some of the actions
Speaker 1: that you're gonna have to think about later. It makes them,
Speaker 1: I think, less daunting, right man. And here's the thing too.
Speaker 1: I know that we're talking about stress in a sort
Speaker 1: of very clinical, kind of unemotional way, but it's worth
Speaker 1: mentioning that financial stress it's not always rational, right. It's
Speaker 1: it's difficult to kind of be out in the real
Speaker 1: world experiencing the you know, the day to day things
Speaker 1: that we're faced with in our lives and to be
Speaker 1: this kind of straightforward and clinical about it. Um. And
Speaker 1: you know, we're actually gonna talk with Michelle Singletary next week,
Speaker 1: and she's been writing about money for decades. She's incredibly frugal,
Speaker 1: and I think probably because of that, she admits to
Speaker 1: having anxiety when it comes to spending on things that
Speaker 1: she's been diligently saving. Four it's something that there's a
Speaker 1: there's almost like a disconnect between the head knowledge of
Speaker 1: you know, understanding something like the way we're talking about
Speaker 1: it right now, versus putting that knowledge into action. And
Speaker 1: so for for Michelle, the difficulty lies and being able
Speaker 1: to enjoy some of what she's actually worked hard in
Speaker 1: order to achieve. Yeah, I feel like financial stress isn't
Speaker 1: always because someone's living paycheck to paycheck, um, And for
Speaker 1: somebody like Michelle and kind of like for myself, I
Speaker 1: feel like that's that's super evident because even when you
Speaker 1: are frugal and you've handled money well for a long
Speaker 1: period of time, like all the numbers point to the
Speaker 1: fact that you really shouldn't be that stressed out, Like
Speaker 1: you're saving a good portion of what you make, your
Speaker 1: investments are looking good, um. But still, I think if
Speaker 1: you have that hyper frugal gene like you, you also
Speaker 1: have to work to overcome some of the stresses that
Speaker 1: money can bring in your life. And maybe you're stressing
Speaker 1: about things that you really don't need to be And
Speaker 1: I know that's yeah, that's can be the case in
Speaker 1: my life as well, where I need to work to
Speaker 1: combat some of those stressors. But in real life, like
Speaker 1: in the moment when I'm feeling those things, like, it's
Speaker 1: it's not easy, right, It's not easy to to do
Speaker 1: that self talk and say, you know what, it's okay,
Speaker 1: let's look at the numbers. Uh, the emotion. It can
Speaker 1: be really difficult to combat the emotion that you're feeling
Speaker 1: with the numbers on the page. Yeah, it takes work
Speaker 1: to control how we feel about the financial situations that
Speaker 1: we have gotten ourselves. And you know that we find
Speaker 1: ourselves in into a certain extent, like we have to
Speaker 1: be willing to kind of rein in our emotions and
Speaker 1: and I think viewing stress is something that we can
Speaker 1: harness like that will allow us to take control of
Speaker 1: not only our lives, but our money too. And so,
Speaker 1: now that we've reframed you know what we think is
Speaker 1: a better way to view financial stress, right after the break,
Speaker 1: we're going to dive into some practical ways that will
Speaker 1: allow you to transform that stress into for progress with
Speaker 1: your money. Alright, we're back from break. We're talking about
Speaker 1: financial stress and how you can actually use it to
Speaker 1: your advantage. And Matt, So, we've talked about how stress
Speaker 1: is traditionally viewed as a negative thing that should be
Speaker 1: avoided at all costs. But I think sometimes when we
Speaker 1: think about stress that way, Um, if we just want
Speaker 1: everything in life to be super easy, we never have
Speaker 1: to rise to the challenge. Stress, in many ways, in
Speaker 1: some forms, can be a helpful motivator. And like also too,
Speaker 1: we've talked about how rewiring the way that we think
Speaker 1: about stress can help us get ahead. Now let's zero
Speaker 1: in on some of the specific ways that we can
Speaker 1: use stress for good in our lives and to be
Speaker 1: helpful for our finances. Yeah, so first you want to
Speaker 1: identify you know what we're gonna call the trouble spots. Right,
Speaker 1: it's hard to manage stress that you might be experiencing
Speaker 1: when you're not even sure what's causing it. And so
Speaker 1: in order to do this, we would we think that
Speaker 1: tracking your spending that is really important in the step
Speaker 1: if you aren't already doing that, right, because how can
Speaker 1: you figure out the trouble spots if you aren't doing
Speaker 1: the basic financial necessity. Finding some clarity around the biggest
Speaker 1: money culprits in your life that need your attention is
Speaker 1: really important. And then after that, once you have tracked
Speaker 1: your money, that's when you can create a plan to
Speaker 1: tell cool those different culprits one by one. Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: I feel like looking at the numbers. Actually it's like
Speaker 1: the exact opposite of what I said before the break,
Speaker 1: But sometimes it actually can be distressing. We've almost like
Speaker 1: built up this problem in our heads, but we don't
Speaker 1: know how big the problem is or what it is
Speaker 1: if we don't know the numbers. And so I think
Speaker 1: you're right identifying some of those trouble spots, you know. Yeah,
Speaker 1: getting specific with what the problem is is like huge
Speaker 1: in the attempt to remedy it, because otherwise it's sort
Speaker 1: of like this vague malaise hanging over your financial situation,
Speaker 1: right because you don't exactly know what's wrong, but you
Speaker 1: know something's wrong, but you gotta put in the work
Speaker 1: to actually figure out what it is. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: I know my money sucks, but I don't know how bad,
Speaker 1: like how bad the situation is, and so or and
Speaker 1: maybe it's not as bad as you think, and that
Speaker 1: might be distressing in and of itself, So I agree, Yeah,
Speaker 1: identifying the trouble spots is key. It should be the
Speaker 1: first thing that you're doing in order to try to
Speaker 1: distress your financial situation. And you mentioned Matt having a plan,
Speaker 1: which is, you know, in financial terms, the plan is
Speaker 1: the budget. Yeah, planned for your money. That's a budget,
Speaker 1: that's right, Yeah, And so yeah, one of our favorite
Speaker 1: budgeting apps called You Need a Budget or wine app
Speaker 1: for short. They conducted a survey and they found that
Speaker 1: a huge majority of their users, three out of four,
Speaker 1: who had a zero based budget, which means all their
Speaker 1: dollars are spoken for. Every single month, they go to
Speaker 1: specific areas of their financial life, whether it's saving, spending, investing,
Speaker 1: paying off debt, and then if they checked that budget
Speaker 1: on a weekly basis, they had little to know financial stress. So, like,
Speaker 1: even when you're in a good spot financially, it's still
Speaker 1: possible to feel overwhelmed, like I talked about, Like I
Speaker 1: get there, and I know a lot of fellow money
Speaker 1: nerds who feel the same way. They feel stressed about
Speaker 1: their finances even though they're doing good with their money.
Speaker 1: But it's so much easier, I think to avoid burnout
Speaker 1: when your budget is working well, when you have a
Speaker 1: game plan, and when you're consistently checking in on it.
Speaker 1: So yeah, tracking your spending, identifying those trouble spots. But
Speaker 1: then also you know, having that budget and checking in
Speaker 1: on it regularly, that's a way to be more in
Speaker 1: tune with what's actually happening in you're finding too and
Speaker 1: it's gonna like, yeah, lower the stress level in almost
Speaker 1: every case, that's right, man. And after that, we would
Speaker 1: recommend for folks just to tackle one thing at a time.
Speaker 1: Once you've created a plan for your money, we want
Speaker 1: you to be realistic about the time that's actually gonna
Speaker 1: take to work on that list of the different trouble
Speaker 1: spots that you're working on. Uh makes me think of Rome, right.
Speaker 1: Rome wasn't built in a day. In your financial ship,
Speaker 1: it's not going to be righted in one single day either.
Speaker 1: We want everyone out there to be kind to yourselves.
Speaker 1: It's you know, likely took you years to get into
Speaker 1: the financial hole that you might have found yourself in. Uh,
Speaker 1: and it's probably gonna take some time for you to
Speaker 1: climb out. But trying to remedy say a dozen different
Speaker 1: financial trouble spots in a week or two will likely
Speaker 1: lead to unmanageable stress. And so again, a small amount
Speaker 1: of stress is good like that informs you, but an
Speaker 1: unmanageable and overwhelming amount of stress can lead to some
Speaker 1: some tough spots. So focus on the most important trouble
Speaker 1: spot and kick that one's butt, and then after that
Speaker 1: move on to number two. It's also helpful to be
Speaker 1: organized and making sure that you're sitting aside the proper
Speaker 1: amount of time to work on your finances as well,
Speaker 1: and so commit and include a weekly counter slot so
Speaker 1: that you're working on your finances regularly, not trying to
Speaker 1: accomplish everything and just one fell swoop, but do it
Speaker 1: methodically and with some regularity. Yeah. Man, it's good to
Speaker 1: have high standards. It's good to have big goals that
Speaker 1: you're shooting for. But I think, yeah, if you if
Speaker 1: you set the bar too high, Uh, let's say you're like,
Speaker 1: it's your first time pole vaulting and you said they
Speaker 1: literally set the bar really high, Um, You're you're probably
Speaker 1: gonna like crash into it with your head or something
Speaker 1: like that, and that might completely eliminate your desire to
Speaker 1: do pole jumping anymore. And I think it's that way
Speaker 1: with with a whole lot of things. If you're like,
Speaker 1: I want to run uh six minute mile, and that
Speaker 1: that's a that's a great goal, just realize that if
Speaker 1: you haven't ran in like eight years, you're probably not
Speaker 1: going to hit that anytime soon. Again, it's this great
Speaker 1: long term goal, but but you have to be realistic
Speaker 1: about the time frame to get there so that you
Speaker 1: don't get completely bummed out in the process and forget
Speaker 1: it all together, just scrap the goal together. You want
Speaker 1: to make sure you approach your money in the same
Speaker 1: way that you're not like, I'm gonna pay off all
Speaker 1: this credit card debt in a month and a half
Speaker 1: when it's actually if you look at it in what
Speaker 1: fits into your budget, it's gonna take, you know, fourteen months.
Speaker 1: You want to be realistic so that you can actually
Speaker 1: achieve those goals. It's important to Matt as we're you know,
Speaker 1: attempting to achieve those goals, to track our progress along
Speaker 1: the way, because it feels really really good when you
Speaker 1: do make progress, like when you do pay off that
Speaker 1: first credit card of three or four right that you
Speaker 1: have a lot of a balance on. But really it's
Speaker 1: it's easy, I think, to allow stress to maybe show
Speaker 1: up and like Steven Seagal style or Chuck Norris style,
Speaker 1: kicked down your mental door rather than like politely knocking
Speaker 1: and kind of being that accelerator. It just does us
Speaker 1: in right, it messes us up mentally. Uh So, Yeah,
Speaker 1: keep a list on hand and cross out the items
Speaker 1: in a red pen and keep a physical list when
Speaker 1: they've been completed, so you can throw a mini celebration
Speaker 1: and then and then remember how far you've come and
Speaker 1: if you need a quick win, which quick wins always helpful.
Speaker 1: So for instance, let's say you want to to make
Speaker 1: that six mile run happen, get out and run today,
Speaker 1: even if it's just a tenth of a mile. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, check out episode two sixty. We we did
Speaker 1: an episode called seven Ways to Save More this week,
Speaker 1: and we really wanted to give people a way to
Speaker 1: do one thing a day for seven days to be
Speaker 1: able to save more and spend less. And that's a
Speaker 1: good resource for you as you want to accelerate that
Speaker 1: progress because there's just something really important about getting that
Speaker 1: first win under your belt. I feel like Matt, one
Speaker 1: win is indicative of another one. Sometimes you get on
Speaker 1: a roll momentum is underrated. It can be a game changer. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's nothing like breaking that losing streak, right, and dude,
Speaker 1: don't forget about the fund as well, the emergency fund.
Speaker 1: Having cash in the bank is Yeah. We we feel
Speaker 1: it's one of the biggest differences between stress just completely
Speaker 1: dominating every thought versus your ability to learn from what
Speaker 1: your stress might be teaching you. Right, So maybe you're
Speaker 1: thinking like that, you know that credit card debt and
Speaker 1: stressing you out. I get it, and I know you
Speaker 1: want to pay it off as soon as possible. But
Speaker 1: having money on hand, starting with the two thousand, four
Speaker 1: hundred and sixty seven dollars that we like to see
Speaker 1: that takes precedent even over high interest rate credit card debt,
Speaker 1: and so make sure to keep that around. Uh. Really,
Speaker 1: it's like a soothing bomb to know that you've got
Speaker 1: liquid funds available should you need them. Yeah, that's a
Speaker 1: super practical way to avoid some of the stressful situations
Speaker 1: that that money mistakes can get you into. Just having
Speaker 1: that cash in the bank account can eliminate a huge
Speaker 1: percentage of the financial stressors, or at least minimize them
Speaker 1: right and make them not seem like as big of
Speaker 1: a deal as we make them out to be. Also,
Speaker 1: to Matt, I think it's it's important for people to
Speaker 1: ask for support from the people in their lives. That
Speaker 1: can also help with the level of financial stress in
Speaker 1: your life. And I'm not talking about hiring a financial planner.
Speaker 1: I think that is one of the things maybe that
Speaker 1: people go to instinctively, is they go pay someone big
Speaker 1: bucks and they say, help me out. I'm stressed out.
Speaker 1: But that doesn't always work the way you want it to.
Speaker 1: So yeah, talking with maybe a partner or a trusted
Speaker 1: friend can really help put things in perspective. Matt, we
Speaker 1: just met with a couple recently over beers. They're about
Speaker 1: to have a baby, and so they're getting more nervous
Speaker 1: about their financial situation. They're like, are we doing this right?
Speaker 1: And so yeah, I feel like you and I we
Speaker 1: were able to offer some help, but we were also
Speaker 1: able to reassure them that they are doing well with
Speaker 1: their finances, that they're crushing it. Yeah, they're in a
Speaker 1: great position, and like, sometimes you just need a dose
Speaker 1: of confidence building kindness to lower the negative emotions that
Speaker 1: you're feeling. You're stressed out with that perspective from someone
Speaker 1: else can help you realize that you're doing a better
Speaker 1: job than you thought you were. That outside input can
Speaker 1: be invaluable and kind of yeah, lowering the level of
Speaker 1: money stress in your life. Yeah, man, that outside input
Speaker 1: can be helpful. I think journaling and going to counseling
Speaker 1: could also be you know, some other ways to manage
Speaker 1: your stress. Uh. And you know why we want to
Speaker 1: encourage everyone to slow down and to be introspective. If
Speaker 1: things are bad enough, it's true that you might need
Speaker 1: the help of of of a nonprofit budget counselor. We
Speaker 1: would recommend for folks to check out Money Management International
Speaker 1: or NAPFA dot org. Uh. If you feel that you're
Speaker 1: in over your head when it comes to debt. You know,
Speaker 1: here on the show, our focus is on the money aspect,
Speaker 1: but you know, sometimes the stress goes beyond just finances. Uh.
Speaker 1: Mental health extends beyond those money conversations that that we
Speaker 1: often have here on the show. And so the National
Speaker 1: Alliance on Mental Illness they actually have resources on their
Speaker 1: site to help if you need more than just a
Speaker 1: budget counselor or a couple of friendly dudes to kind
Speaker 1: of talk through your finances. With and we'll make sure
Speaker 1: to link to all of those sites on our website. Yeah,
Speaker 1: sometimes a budget counselor is you know, the right thing,
Speaker 1: that's the person you need. Sometimes it's just a friend,
Speaker 1: and sometimes it is you know, an actual license therapist
Speaker 1: or a counselor. Um and Matt, I think you know
Speaker 1: one other way in which we can lower the level
Speaker 1: of stressing our lives that's often overlooked, and it's probably
Speaker 1: because we are turning to things like self care a
Speaker 1: little bit too much. We're turning on Netflix, or we're
Speaker 1: scrolling through our phones in order to kind of not
Speaker 1: focus on the things that are stressing us out. But
Speaker 1: sometimes we're just way too focused on ourselves, Like we
Speaker 1: see all the little things that might not be as
Speaker 1: big of a deal as we're making them out to be.
Speaker 1: And so I think one of the perfect antidotes is
Speaker 1: taking time to serve someone else. That might mean having
Speaker 1: a friend over for dinner who's been having a tough time.
Speaker 1: Let's say they lived alone during the pandemic and they
Speaker 1: are just massively in need of some social interaction. Um,
Speaker 1: you know, making dinner for them and having a glass
Speaker 1: of wine together and talking and just caring for them
Speaker 1: in that way I think can be a huge d
Speaker 1: stressor or volunteering in your community to tutor kids after school.
Speaker 1: There really is like something almost magical about serving others
Speaker 1: and how it affects our stress levels in a positive way.
Speaker 1: I think it just puts everything in perspective, helping us
Speaker 1: realize that there's a whole lot more going on in
Speaker 1: this world than just our problem, whether it's money based
Speaker 1: or or something else. Yeah, but I think volunteering and
Speaker 1: service projects, um and and just caring for someone else,
Speaker 1: whether it's a neighbor or a friend really well is
Speaker 1: definitely a way to help mitigate some of the stresses
Speaker 1: that we're feeling. Yeah. I think when we're able to
Speaker 1: remove ourselves from our own situations sometimes and kind of
Speaker 1: look at the world and ah, you know, with a
Speaker 1: wider lens, it definitely provides some of that that missing
Speaker 1: perspective in our lives. And so, man, you know that
Speaker 1: kind of as we wrap things up here, we we
Speaker 1: feel that it's impossible to kick stress to the curb
Speaker 1: completely right, and when it comes down to it, we
Speaker 1: think that the right amount of stress can actually be
Speaker 1: a motivating tool for good in our lives. Um. You know,
Speaker 1: like we feel that life is always throwing us curveballs,
Speaker 1: but being in a tough financial spot that can actually
Speaker 1: make life even more stressful. And we want money to
Speaker 1: be a source of less stress in your life. So
Speaker 1: instead of taking you know, the stress relief routes that
Speaker 1: most Americans take, which, like we said, you know, it
Speaker 1: only leads to worse outcomes and and even more stress.
Speaker 1: We would rather see folks set more realistic expectations h
Speaker 1: and to start working towards solutions that will will impact
Speaker 1: your mental health and your finances in a positive way.
Speaker 1: We don't want you to completely ignore stress in your life,
Speaker 1: but we want you instead to listen to it. We
Speaker 1: wanted to inform the decisions you make so that you're
Speaker 1: working towards your goals. No doubt, Matt, stress can have
Speaker 1: a good side, it turns out, and hopefully we can
Speaker 1: use that stress as a motivator and not as yeah,
Speaker 1: something that defeats us. Um. But let's move back to
Speaker 1: the beer that we had on this episode. This one
Speaker 1: was called Mouhito by Bolero Snort Brewery. He told Logger
Speaker 1: with lime, juice and mint, what was your take on it? Uh? Beach. Like.
Speaker 1: That's what I thought of as I was rinking this beer.
Speaker 1: And I think the reason it reminds me of the
Speaker 1: beach not just because of the mohito, but because it
Speaker 1: tastes a lot like bud Light lime. And the only
Speaker 1: time I think I've ever had that beer is actually
Speaker 1: on the beach. Uh. I know, back in the day,
Speaker 1: you're the only place it's okay to Yeah, so, uh,
Speaker 1: you know, this was a different beer, a different take
Speaker 1: on this style of lager. And here's the thing, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna hate on any specific type of style of beer,
Speaker 1: because I think there's virtually a time and place for
Speaker 1: any type of beer out there. It was fun to
Speaker 1: enjoy this one today. You know, temperatures are definitely warmer
Speaker 1: around uh here in Atlanta. I thought this one was good,
Speaker 1: but I think I would have enjoyed it even more
Speaker 1: if I was sitting there with my toes in the sand. Yeah,
Speaker 1: everything tastes better with your toes in the sand. I
Speaker 1: think that's what Corona at least is banking on with
Speaker 1: their and the way they do their commercials. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I thought this this beer was had a refreshing factor
Speaker 1: for sure, right because like mint and lime, those those
Speaker 1: two ingredients just to me, they dream refreshing. But it
Speaker 1: was light and it did taste a little bit like
Speaker 1: a beer moheat um. Like I think they got what
Speaker 1: they were going for. But yeah, for me, this wasn't
Speaker 1: my jam um in a big way. I would say
Speaker 1: I probably wouldn't pick this up again at the bottle shop,
Speaker 1: but uh, it was. I agree. If if I was
Speaker 1: on the beach, I'd feel differently about it. I'd probably
Speaker 1: be down with this. It's just not a beer that
Speaker 1: I want to drink within the four walls of my
Speaker 1: home or our podcasting studio totally. Well, that's the thing.
Speaker 1: Like there's beers like we we've taken really good beers
Speaker 1: to the beach before, like when we go to the
Speaker 1: beach with our families, and we've had really good beers
Speaker 1: on the beach before, and I'll tell you what, I
Speaker 1: did not enjoy them nearly as much out there in
Speaker 1: the sun, sweating, you know, with the ocean, you know,
Speaker 1: out before you it's like too much and so yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: there's there's almost too much flavor and so the time
Speaker 1: in the place that you enjoy a beer that has
Speaker 1: everything to do with the ultimate satisfaction of the beverage.
Speaker 1: But even still, man, I'm glad that you and I
Speaker 1: got to share this one on the show today, and
Speaker 1: that's gonna be it for this episode. Listeners will be
Speaker 1: able to find our show notes up on our website
Speaker 1: at how some money dot com. That's right, So until
Speaker 1: next time, best friends Out, Best Friends Out,