1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:05,320 Speaker 1: That time you got home from a week of double 2 00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:09,479 Speaker 1: shifts and your dog didn't recognize you. Let's go. He 3 00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:11,559 Speaker 1: hates me? Hates me? Do you want to treat? You 4 00:00:11,640 --> 00:00:14,840 Speaker 1: want to treat? Oh? You knew it was time for 5 00:00:15,040 --> 00:00:19,360 Speaker 1: something new. Let's job it up at career Builder. You 6 00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:22,120 Speaker 1: can find jobs with the work life balance and salary 7 00:00:22,200 --> 00:00:25,400 Speaker 1: you want, plus build a resume and apply to multiple 8 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:29,080 Speaker 1: jobs in just one click. Start your search at CareerBuilder 9 00:00:29,160 --> 00:00:32,639 Speaker 1: dot com. 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Our simple, customizable search tool lets you 20 00:01:08,720 --> 00:01:11,479 Speaker 1: search for part time, full time, and even work from 21 00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:13,800 Speaker 1: home jobs so you can find a job that fits 22 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:19,560 Speaker 1: your lifestyle. Get started now at CareerBuilder dot com. Please 23 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:23,399 Speaker 1: be advised the following episode contains references to violence and 24 00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:32,280 Speaker 1: may not be suitable for all listeners. This is Bets 25 00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:35,600 Speaker 1: you Should Know, a podcast from iHeartRadio celebrating the many 26 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:37,679 Speaker 1: who have selflessly put their lives on the line to 27 00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 1: serve their country in the armed forces. Every Veterans Day, 28 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 1: we as a country honor and commemorate the people who 29 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:46,200 Speaker 1: fight for our freedom and defend our country. And in 30 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 1: this four part series, you'll hear from these individuals as 31 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:52,360 Speaker 1: they share their unique experiences in the military and the 32 00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 1: lessons they learned that carried them into their new roles 33 00:01:54,840 --> 00:01:58,040 Speaker 1: in civilian life. In this episode, I'm talking to retired 34 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:02,880 Speaker 1: Staff Sergeant Patrick Nelson of the Army National Guard. At first, 35 00:02:03,080 --> 00:02:06,280 Speaker 1: Patrick decided to attend boot camp to escape a difficult 36 00:02:06,280 --> 00:02:08,800 Speaker 1: home life, But a few years later, he dropped out 37 00:02:08,800 --> 00:02:11,280 Speaker 1: of a community college two days after nine to eleven 38 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:14,800 Speaker 1: and went active duty with the National Guard. Patrick eventually 39 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:18,440 Speaker 1: retired from the Army and transitioned out of active duty. Today, 40 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:21,000 Speaker 1: he speaks to groups across the country, sharing stories of 41 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,799 Speaker 1: a service and telling audience is about the inspiring men 42 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:29,520 Speaker 1: and women he served with whom we lost overseas. Hey, Patrick, 43 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 1: how are you? Hey? I'm good, Bobby. How are you doing? 44 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,560 Speaker 1: Pretty good? Good to talk to you. Where you live 45 00:02:33,639 --> 00:02:36,760 Speaker 1: right now? Where are you? I am in Elk River, Minnesota, 46 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:40,080 Speaker 1: which is just a suburb of the Minneapolis Saint Paul area. 47 00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:42,320 Speaker 1: So is it freezing cold up there right now? Or 48 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:46,640 Speaker 1: almost getting in? No, it's pretty cold. We're expected to 49 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:50,639 Speaker 1: get five to seven inches of snow today, so we're 50 00:02:50,639 --> 00:02:53,080 Speaker 1: in the middle of it right now. Fall has passed 51 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,880 Speaker 1: the spy and we've shifted into winter. I am not 52 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,080 Speaker 1: lying to you here, I'm looking because I'm in Nashville 53 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:00,960 Speaker 1: right now and it is seven eight degrees right now. 54 00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: It could not be nice. Nice. So you enlisted in 55 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,400 Speaker 1: the military in what year? Well? I first enlisted in 56 00:03:08,440 --> 00:03:12,360 Speaker 1: the Minnesota Army National Guard in February of two thousand, 57 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,840 Speaker 1: while I was a junior in high school. Well, why, 58 00:03:15,200 --> 00:03:17,640 Speaker 1: as a junior in high school did you feel that 59 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:20,840 Speaker 1: it was the right time for you to get involved? Well, Bobby, 60 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:25,000 Speaker 1: I didn't have the greatest childhood growing up. It certainly 61 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,720 Speaker 1: could have been worse. But I heard a bunch of 62 00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:29,840 Speaker 1: guys from my high school we're joining and they said 63 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:33,040 Speaker 1: They're going to send us down to Oklahoma for basic 64 00:03:33,120 --> 00:03:37,520 Speaker 1: training for the entire summer, and I was like, what 65 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 1: I want to get out of here? Count me in 66 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:48,440 Speaker 1: And I signed up, really not knowing what to expect, 67 00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:52,440 Speaker 1: but just wanting to take a break from the situation 68 00:03:52,840 --> 00:03:56,680 Speaker 1: back home. You went to Oklahoma for basic first, right, 69 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,440 Speaker 1: and what was that experience like for you? That's correct, 70 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:04,480 Speaker 1: it was, yeah, Basic training Fort Sill, Oklahoma. It was interesting. 71 00:04:04,560 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 1: I think it's everything that you would think it would be. 72 00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:10,400 Speaker 1: I had a fun time because I was there with 73 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:12,680 Speaker 1: a bunch of buddies from high school, so I think 74 00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:16,200 Speaker 1: that probably made it a lot easier and I got 75 00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:20,000 Speaker 1: to do some things that I've never done before, similar 76 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,600 Speaker 1: to your story. You know, I had a very rough 77 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:25,120 Speaker 1: childhood growing up. You know, my mom was an addict. 78 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:27,839 Speaker 1: I never knew my dad kind of had to figure 79 00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:30,480 Speaker 1: out situations. And you know, it's it's wild how we 80 00:04:30,560 --> 00:04:33,000 Speaker 1: have to find other places to go to get a 81 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:38,280 Speaker 1: feeling of involvement, sometimes love, sometimes a feeling of just accomplishment. 82 00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:41,400 Speaker 1: And mine was you know, church and performing, you know 83 00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:44,320 Speaker 1: for me, And it's awesome that yours was the military. 84 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,960 Speaker 1: And so you're a junior in high school, you're going 85 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:49,640 Speaker 1: through basic When did you go this is gonna be 86 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:52,880 Speaker 1: something I know I'm going to do for a long time. Yeah, well, 87 00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 1: so you know, I got back in, you know, started 88 00:04:55,120 --> 00:04:58,240 Speaker 1: my senior year of high school, had zero direction with 89 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,440 Speaker 1: what I was going to do in life. I didn't 90 00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,400 Speaker 1: have the family support that said, here, you should you 91 00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:08,080 Speaker 1: visit these colleges. Here, let me help you fill out 92 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:12,039 Speaker 1: these forms and applications. It was basically just me navigating 93 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:15,679 Speaker 1: things on my own. And after I graduated high school 94 00:05:15,680 --> 00:05:20,200 Speaker 1: and I barely graduated again, there's a lot of similarity 95 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:22,640 Speaker 1: between our stories because you know, I saw drugs in 96 00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 1: the house, my mother arrested. I did not know my 97 00:05:24,839 --> 00:05:27,160 Speaker 1: biological father growing up. I didn't meet him till three 98 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,520 Speaker 1: years ago, which is an even more interesting story, and 99 00:05:29,560 --> 00:05:32,200 Speaker 1: he's a wonderful man. But yeah, I had no idea 100 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:34,000 Speaker 1: what I said to do. I had to go back 101 00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:38,880 Speaker 1: to Oklahoma again for my advanced training, and then I 102 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:41,800 Speaker 1: came back and I enrolled in a community college in 103 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,880 Speaker 1: west central Minnesota, and three weeks into my first semester, 104 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:50,440 Speaker 1: I was skipping classes already. It's you safe to say 105 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,120 Speaker 1: that I wasn't going to find a lot of success 106 00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:57,159 Speaker 1: in college, but then that Tuesday in September, all of 107 00:05:57,160 --> 00:06:02,240 Speaker 1: our lives changed. And as I watched on TV, just 108 00:06:02,320 --> 00:06:07,880 Speaker 1: like everybody else, I felt those same feelings of helplessness, sorrow, anger, 109 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: And two days after the attacks, I went and visited 110 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:15,719 Speaker 1: the recruiter's office and asked to go active duty Army. 111 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:19,200 Speaker 1: I knew that the military is going to be doing 112 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:21,880 Speaker 1: something in response to this, and I knew that the 113 00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,960 Speaker 1: active duty obviously would be the ones going first, and 114 00:06:25,360 --> 00:06:29,479 Speaker 1: driven by all those patriotic feelings and emotions I wanted 115 00:06:29,560 --> 00:06:32,479 Speaker 1: to be. I wanted to be part of it. You know, 116 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: when looking at you getting in January two thousand and 117 00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:38,279 Speaker 1: two and you talk about nine to eleven and just 118 00:06:38,839 --> 00:06:42,400 Speaker 1: listening to how as a student you weren't as disciplined 119 00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 1: as you would like to be. Why do you think 120 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,600 Speaker 1: you felt like you wanted to get into what is 121 00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:52,760 Speaker 1: probably the most disciplined area you can go into, which 122 00:06:52,800 --> 00:06:54,400 Speaker 1: is the military. Why did you feel like that was 123 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:57,440 Speaker 1: right for you? Yeah, that's a great question. I think 124 00:06:57,520 --> 00:07:00,680 Speaker 1: a lot of it boiled down to grow up. I 125 00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:02,479 Speaker 1: feel like I had a lot of self awareness. I 126 00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:07,359 Speaker 1: understood my lot in life, how people viewed me. But 127 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:10,320 Speaker 1: at the same time, I also had friends who had 128 00:07:10,440 --> 00:07:13,880 Speaker 1: very you know, what i'd call normal families and normal 129 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:18,320 Speaker 1: family experiences, and I really craved that and wanted that 130 00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:21,960 Speaker 1: and would try to surround myself with those type of people. 131 00:07:22,040 --> 00:07:25,760 Speaker 1: So I learned at a very early age the importance 132 00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 1: of surrounding yourself with the right people, and I knew 133 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:31,040 Speaker 1: that I would get that in the military. So you 134 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:34,680 Speaker 1: specialized as a filled artillery cannon crew member, you gotta 135 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:38,320 Speaker 1: help me. What does that job entail? That job entails 136 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:43,680 Speaker 1: shooting a howitzer cannon and so specifically I was on 137 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 1: a one oh five millimeter howitzer cannon, so I was 138 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:51,320 Speaker 1: a paratrooper and so it's something that can be parachuted 139 00:07:51,360 --> 00:07:54,400 Speaker 1: out of the back of an airplane, that can be 140 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:58,200 Speaker 1: sling loaded underneath a helicopter. So it's a very agile 141 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:02,040 Speaker 1: artillery piece where we can shooting, move and get the 142 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:05,600 Speaker 1: job done. So from when you first start training until 143 00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:09,400 Speaker 1: you're actually active with it, what is that training process 144 00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:13,600 Speaker 1: that sounds extremely intense? Yeah, it's it's pretty intense. You know, 145 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:18,200 Speaker 1: in basic training and your advanced individual training, it's really 146 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:21,360 Speaker 1: just sort of introducing you to the military because you 147 00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:24,239 Speaker 1: really don't learn the most until you're at your unit. 148 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:27,480 Speaker 1: And so when I finally was able to get active 149 00:08:27,520 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 1: duty in January two thousand and two, I first got 150 00:08:29,920 --> 00:08:34,720 Speaker 1: sent to this unit in Germany, which was a rocket brigade, 151 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:37,960 Speaker 1: so they fired rockets. I was used to shooting cannons, 152 00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:43,960 Speaker 1: and so they gave me the position of the colonel's driver. 153 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,040 Speaker 1: Now I didn't drop out of college after nine to 154 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 1: eleven to drive the colonel and make sure his coffee 155 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:54,079 Speaker 1: was hot. I happened to be at a training exercise 156 00:08:54,559 --> 00:08:57,040 Speaker 1: one day we were in Germany, and I saw these 157 00:08:57,040 --> 00:09:00,600 Speaker 1: guys parachuting out of the back of helicopters and I 158 00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,120 Speaker 1: pointed up to my first startant, to a standing next 159 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:04,679 Speaker 1: to me. I said, that's the stuff that I want 160 00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:08,040 Speaker 1: to do, and he had the right connections. With the 161 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:11,440 Speaker 1: help of a lot of paperwork, I got reassigned down 162 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:15,480 Speaker 1: to the one seventy third Airborne Brigade based out of Vicenza, Italy. 163 00:09:16,280 --> 00:09:18,360 Speaker 1: So you're a guy that grows up in a small 164 00:09:18,400 --> 00:09:21,360 Speaker 1: town in Minnesota, you're in Oklahoma doing basic and all 165 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:24,480 Speaker 1: of a sudden, you're all around the world. You're in Germany, 166 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:26,520 Speaker 1: you're in Italy, What's I mean, That's got to be 167 00:09:26,559 --> 00:09:29,240 Speaker 1: a bit of a culture shock to you. Huh. Absolutely 168 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:36,439 Speaker 1: huge culture shock, but such an amazing opportunity for myself 169 00:09:36,480 --> 00:09:39,120 Speaker 1: just to have that exposure. And just I mean, even 170 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:41,080 Speaker 1: in the military alone, even if I would have been 171 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:44,520 Speaker 1: stationed in the States, it's a blender full of people, 172 00:09:44,559 --> 00:09:46,240 Speaker 1: and it was just such a pleasure and joy to 173 00:09:46,240 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 1: be able to serve with such a diverse group. But 174 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:56,119 Speaker 1: as fulfilling as the experience was, Patrick faced major adversity 175 00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:58,640 Speaker 1: while deployed. In two thousand and five, he was stationed 176 00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:02,560 Speaker 1: at a forward operating base along the Pakistani border, serving 177 00:10:02,559 --> 00:10:06,000 Speaker 1: as fire support for a special forces team. It was 178 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:09,199 Speaker 1: here alongside the Pakistani border that everything changed in an 179 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 1: instant for Patrick. It was June, which meant fighting season 180 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:16,439 Speaker 1: was starting to pick up. Things were starting to get 181 00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:20,120 Speaker 1: pretty busy, so we needed some more ammunition. I went 182 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,439 Speaker 1: over to help that other section that day because they 183 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:25,960 Speaker 1: had a sergeant leaving on R and R, so I 184 00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 1: was gonna basically backfill his position while he was gone. 185 00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:31,079 Speaker 1: And so as I heard the sound of the Chinook 186 00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:34,480 Speaker 1: helicopter approaching, I hopped in a humby with my good 187 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 1: friend Luke and then just as we're about to pull 188 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:40,520 Speaker 1: away to drive out to the landing zone, my soldier 189 00:10:40,760 --> 00:10:42,920 Speaker 1: hopped in the back. Now he was supposed to be 190 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:46,400 Speaker 1: back with our section, So I turned around and I 191 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:47,920 Speaker 1: was about to yell at him, but I thought, for 192 00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:50,760 Speaker 1: a second, you know what I value that kind of 193 00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:53,160 Speaker 1: work ethic. He wants to come lift some heavy boxes 194 00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:57,760 Speaker 1: in this heat out here, that's great. Our section can 195 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:00,360 Speaker 1: no problem handle the job without the both of us. 196 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 1: But then I realized he didn't have his helmet on, 197 00:11:03,520 --> 00:11:07,960 Speaker 1: and Bobby I literally opened my mouth, But then I 198 00:11:08,040 --> 00:11:10,719 Speaker 1: realized I didn't have mine on either, and it's kind 199 00:11:10,720 --> 00:11:12,480 Speaker 1: of hard for me to say something if I'm not 200 00:11:12,559 --> 00:11:14,840 Speaker 1: doing the right thing. So we got out to the 201 00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:17,880 Speaker 1: landing zone. The Chinook landed, and a group of ten 202 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:20,600 Speaker 1: of us stepped to the side of the aircraft so 203 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 1: they could take the machine gun off the back ramp. 204 00:11:23,400 --> 00:11:26,160 Speaker 1: My platoon sergeant he handed me a piece of paper 205 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:29,600 Speaker 1: with some serial numbers items we are expecting. The rotor 206 00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:32,400 Speaker 1: blades are turning, it's kicking up dust. You can't hear 207 00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:35,480 Speaker 1: anybody talk. And I grabbed the piece of paper and 208 00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:38,880 Speaker 1: I turned around to ground guide. My buddy Luke and 209 00:11:38,960 --> 00:11:40,800 Speaker 1: the hum vied to gi him a little bit closer 210 00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:42,760 Speaker 1: to the back of the helicopter, so it's a little 211 00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:45,800 Speaker 1: shorter distance to load the ammunition. And the next thing 212 00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 1: I remember, I'm just picked up and I'm slammed to 213 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:57,559 Speaker 1: the ground, unsure what happened. I look up and you know, 214 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 1: I see bodies laying everywhere. I see blood, and I 215 00:12:01,640 --> 00:12:04,400 Speaker 1: initially thought maybe one of the engines on the helicopter 216 00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:09,320 Speaker 1: had possibly exploded. The helicopter powered down, and then I 217 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:12,240 Speaker 1: heard that distinct sound of an incoming one oh seven 218 00:12:12,280 --> 00:12:15,560 Speaker 1: millimeter rocket and I got up in a dove underneath 219 00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:19,960 Speaker 1: the humby for cover as more rockets impacted around us, 220 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:23,280 Speaker 1: And as soon as the barrage ended, I crawled out 221 00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:27,319 Speaker 1: from underneath and I started running back to the soldiers 222 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:29,720 Speaker 1: that were still on the ground, really unsure of what 223 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:32,600 Speaker 1: I was going to find. And as I was running, 224 00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:35,760 Speaker 1: a marine that was on our base training Afghan National 225 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:37,920 Speaker 1: Army soldiers had yelled to me that I'd been hit, 226 00:12:38,760 --> 00:12:41,000 Speaker 1: and up until that point and it felt any pain. 227 00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,439 Speaker 1: But I turned my head and looked at the back 228 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:45,559 Speaker 1: of my uniform and it was shredded and blood was 229 00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:47,880 Speaker 1: point out, and it was at that moment the pain 230 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,000 Speaker 1: really hit me. So they brought us to the small 231 00:12:50,040 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 1: Afghan clinic that was within our forward operating base and 232 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:57,160 Speaker 1: was ran by an Afghan doctor, and so it was 233 00:12:57,200 --> 00:13:01,680 Speaker 1: a mass casualty situation, and my wounds were very minor 234 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:04,880 Speaker 1: compared to everybody else. I took some shrapnel to the back, 235 00:13:05,200 --> 00:13:08,040 Speaker 1: nothing too serious, had a piece of still stick an otomy. 236 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:10,719 Speaker 1: One of the Special Forces guys came by with his 237 00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:13,560 Speaker 1: little leatherman tool, whipped out his plyers and pulled it out. 238 00:13:14,200 --> 00:13:17,720 Speaker 1: That was pretty interesting. And I got bandaged up, and 239 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,680 Speaker 1: I started looking around and see who else was hurt. 240 00:13:19,880 --> 00:13:22,920 Speaker 1: And I saw a supply sergeant that was recently attached 241 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:26,520 Speaker 1: to us from a National Guard unit out of Massachusetts, 242 00:13:26,559 --> 00:13:29,280 Speaker 1: and he's laying on this elevated stretcher, and the local 243 00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:33,120 Speaker 1: Afghan doctor, who is like five feet two inches is 244 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:37,439 Speaker 1: standing on this red melt crate performing CPR. So I 245 00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:40,320 Speaker 1: kind of do a quick lap around the clinic trying 246 00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,040 Speaker 1: to see who else is hurt, how bad, and I 247 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:45,080 Speaker 1: come back around it. It couldn't have been more than 248 00:13:45,160 --> 00:13:48,600 Speaker 1: forty five seconds, and they're zipping Michael up into a 249 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:56,360 Speaker 1: body bag and I find my way into a small 250 00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:58,960 Speaker 1: room in the back of the clinic there, and that's 251 00:13:58,960 --> 00:14:01,680 Speaker 1: where I see my soldiering Manuel Hernandez, laying on a table. 252 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:05,400 Speaker 1: His head is bandaged. A few people are working on him, 253 00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:08,679 Speaker 1: but I could see his chest rise and fall, so 254 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:10,920 Speaker 1: I knew that he was breathing, and I grabbed his hand. 255 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:15,120 Speaker 1: I said, hey, everything's going to be okay. Medivac helicopters arrived. 256 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,920 Speaker 1: They brought us to forward surgical teams in the region. 257 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:23,560 Speaker 1: They removed several pieces of shrapnel from my back, left 258 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:27,320 Speaker 1: a few souvenirs in there for me, bandaged me up, 259 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:30,000 Speaker 1: sent me back out to the landing zone for another 260 00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:35,640 Speaker 1: helicopter ride to Bogger Mayorfield for some further advanced medical care. 261 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:38,880 Speaker 1: And it was as I was waiting there, my commander 262 00:14:38,880 --> 00:14:41,360 Speaker 1: approached me and asked me how I was doing, and 263 00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:44,240 Speaker 1: I told him I was going to be fine, And 264 00:14:44,280 --> 00:14:47,080 Speaker 1: of course I asked, I said, well, how's Hernandez And 265 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:48,640 Speaker 1: he looked at me said He's going to be okay, 266 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:53,280 Speaker 1: And you know, I just felt such relief. And he 267 00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:56,360 Speaker 1: turned to walk away, and he got about three or 268 00:14:56,360 --> 00:15:00,640 Speaker 1: four steps and he turned around in tier were rolling 269 00:15:00,680 --> 00:15:02,720 Speaker 1: down his cheeks and he said I'm sorry that I lied. 270 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:10,640 Speaker 1: Hernandez didn't make it, and I dropped to my knees 271 00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:17,880 Speaker 1: and I just lost it. He died because I didn't 272 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 1: have the courage to speak up, because I wasn't doing 273 00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:29,000 Speaker 1: the right thing. And that was something that haunted me 274 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:32,320 Speaker 1: for a long time as I finished my military career 275 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:36,040 Speaker 1: and even as I transitioned into the civilian world. You know, 276 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:39,400 Speaker 1: I tried to drink it away. I tried to wash 277 00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:44,920 Speaker 1: it away with pills. But I've learned over time it's 278 00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:46,960 Speaker 1: such a cliche. I can't change the past, but I 279 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,560 Speaker 1: can influence the future. And so I've learned that I 280 00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:53,080 Speaker 1: can take that story. I can take my failure. I 281 00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:56,680 Speaker 1: can take the sacrifice of Emmanuel and Michael and other 282 00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:59,160 Speaker 1: friends of mine that I've lost in combat, and I 283 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:02,760 Speaker 1: can share them with others to inspire them. And so 284 00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:05,880 Speaker 1: I've really found a purpose and being able to share 285 00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:08,760 Speaker 1: my story with others and also just let them know 286 00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:11,440 Speaker 1: about these these brave men that I had the honor 287 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:14,600 Speaker 1: of serving with. Well, first, i'd like to thank you 288 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:17,320 Speaker 1: for sharing that part of your story. I know that 289 00:16:17,760 --> 00:16:20,200 Speaker 1: you were extremely vulnerable to tell that, and that so 290 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:22,880 Speaker 1: many people are going to benefit from you just sharing 291 00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:25,160 Speaker 1: what you've gone through, because people have and we'll go 292 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:27,520 Speaker 1: through very similar things. So first before we move on 293 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:29,360 Speaker 1: to the next part and some other questions that for me, 294 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:32,640 Speaker 1: I would just like to thank you for spending those 295 00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:38,920 Speaker 1: few minutes talking about that with me. After spending nearly 296 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:41,480 Speaker 1: seven years as a paratrooper in the US Army and 297 00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:45,360 Speaker 1: completing three combat deployments in various leadership positions, earning a 298 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:48,280 Speaker 1: Bronze Star and Purple Heart, Patrick turned us focus to 299 00:16:48,360 --> 00:16:54,720 Speaker 1: helping others. Being able to place yourself up in somebody 300 00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:57,680 Speaker 1: else's shoes and see things from their perspective is something 301 00:16:57,720 --> 00:16:59,680 Speaker 1: we need so much more of in this world that 302 00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:03,560 Speaker 1: we're living in today. And so I'm able to take 303 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:06,439 Speaker 1: that story and just it one. It connects me with 304 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:09,320 Speaker 1: other people, like you said, who've had maybe not the 305 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:13,600 Speaker 1: same obviously tragedies being blown up by a rocket, but 306 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:19,800 Speaker 1: people who've experienced grief or people who've experienced loss, and 307 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:24,720 Speaker 1: just attempting to be a role model for them to 308 00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:28,639 Speaker 1: show them that, yes, it still impacts me, it still hurts, 309 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,160 Speaker 1: but I can do something about it as far as 310 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:35,359 Speaker 1: sharing that story and influencing others. And you know, in February. 311 00:17:35,760 --> 00:17:38,520 Speaker 1: I lost my job, like a lot of people did, 312 00:17:38,600 --> 00:17:40,760 Speaker 1: and now I am making a go of it on 313 00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:45,040 Speaker 1: my own, trying to be a speaker to share my story, 314 00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:47,840 Speaker 1: and I will talk to anybody that will sit down 315 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:52,000 Speaker 1: and listen. It has made me very purpose driven. When 316 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,720 Speaker 1: I was in the military, or rather when I signed up, 317 00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:58,760 Speaker 1: I signed up for all those patriotic reasons, but when 318 00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:02,440 Speaker 1: I was in it was just another job. We woke 319 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:04,159 Speaker 1: up a little bit earlier than most people, and we 320 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:08,320 Speaker 1: took extended business trips. But just like somebody might be 321 00:18:08,359 --> 00:18:10,880 Speaker 1: an insurance salesman, I was a soldier. I didn't think 322 00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,960 Speaker 1: about that patriotic stuff. And it wasn't until I got 323 00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:19,000 Speaker 1: out that I reflected on my experiences and realize I 324 00:18:19,080 --> 00:18:22,719 Speaker 1: was part of something so much bigger than myself. I 325 00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:26,000 Speaker 1: tried for a long time thinking I had to replicate 326 00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:30,080 Speaker 1: that exact purpose, which I quickly learned that I never 327 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,200 Speaker 1: was going to be able to do. But I have 328 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:36,240 Speaker 1: found a purpose again and just being able to inspire others, 329 00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:40,400 Speaker 1: to help them realize that they can impact those around them, 330 00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 1: because sometimes the smallest access service have the biggest impact, 331 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:50,159 Speaker 1: and you may never know unless you speak up or 332 00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:53,320 Speaker 1: talk to somebody or reach out. You just never know 333 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 1: the impact that you could have on somebody's life. Whenever 334 00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:59,720 Speaker 1: you transition into civilian life, did you have a clear 335 00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,600 Speaker 1: path that you knew that you would follow getting back 336 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:06,000 Speaker 1: and what was that transition like for you. I knew 337 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,359 Speaker 1: before I got out that I needed to have a plan. 338 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:13,280 Speaker 1: I saw a lot of soldiers leave the military without 339 00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,480 Speaker 1: a plan and say, you know what, I'm going to 340 00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 1: take a couple months off, then I'm going to go 341 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,320 Speaker 1: to college. I'm gonna use my benefits. And I never 342 00:19:21,359 --> 00:19:23,639 Speaker 1: saw him do it. While I was in Afghanistan on 343 00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:27,719 Speaker 1: my last deployment, which was fifteen months long, I had 344 00:19:27,760 --> 00:19:32,520 Speaker 1: already received one scholarship, a Horatio alger military scholar. I 345 00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:35,240 Speaker 1: had been accepted into college. I had signed a lease 346 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,560 Speaker 1: on an apartment in the city that I was moving to. 347 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:40,680 Speaker 1: I knew that I had to have things in place, 348 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:43,960 Speaker 1: so when I got out, I was ready to rock 349 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,120 Speaker 1: and roll and again even though I had a plan, 350 00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:51,080 Speaker 1: though it wasn't wasn't always easy. I didn't expect the 351 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:55,720 Speaker 1: challenges that I faced with the PTSC symptoms that came 352 00:19:55,800 --> 00:20:00,720 Speaker 1: up and the challenges that I had with my reliance 353 00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:02,800 Speaker 1: on prescription pills. So I got out and I had 354 00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:06,520 Speaker 1: two surgeries related to my wounds. I was on Viking 355 00:20:06,600 --> 00:20:10,159 Speaker 1: in a morphine for five years. I didn't go anywhere 356 00:20:10,200 --> 00:20:12,680 Speaker 1: without a bunch of pills in my pocket. It took 357 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:14,520 Speaker 1: me a long time to realize that I even had 358 00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:19,760 Speaker 1: a problem. The pills, the drugs, the alcohol, they only 359 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,800 Speaker 1: act as accelerants for any type of PTSD challenges you 360 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:27,880 Speaker 1: might have. So having to overcome that was tough, and 361 00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:31,320 Speaker 1: so I think still having that foundation of the plan 362 00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:36,600 Speaker 1: really was able to help keep me on a path 363 00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:41,040 Speaker 1: which wasn't always straight. But then also having my girlfriend 364 00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,760 Speaker 1: at the time who is now my wife, and again 365 00:20:43,840 --> 00:20:47,359 Speaker 1: understanding the importance of surrounding myself with people who have 366 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,840 Speaker 1: your best interests in mind, not yes men or yes women, right, 367 00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:52,960 Speaker 1: people who are not going to tell you what you 368 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:55,320 Speaker 1: want to hear, but obviously what you need to hear. 369 00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:57,359 Speaker 1: Two thousand and eight, I think you go back and 370 00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:00,760 Speaker 1: get your degree, But what inspires you to do that? Yeah, again, 371 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:03,280 Speaker 1: kind of really goes back to the tough childhood that 372 00:21:03,359 --> 00:21:05,960 Speaker 1: I had. People didn't look at me growing up, and 373 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:07,479 Speaker 1: I'm sure it might have been the same for you. 374 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:09,919 Speaker 1: Bobby saying, man, that kid's going to go places someday 375 00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:13,560 Speaker 1: and do some great things. And it really was driven 376 00:21:13,600 --> 00:21:17,280 Speaker 1: by the sense of wanting to overcome the stereotypes and 377 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:21,280 Speaker 1: the statistics and have a sense of achievement. After I 378 00:21:21,320 --> 00:21:23,399 Speaker 1: got wounded in the military, I got METAVACT out of 379 00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:26,879 Speaker 1: there and I was gone for three weeks. A fellow 380 00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:30,120 Speaker 1: soldier my unit by the name of Greg Trent, had 381 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:33,439 Speaker 1: a conversation with me, and Greg was able to sneak 382 00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:35,439 Speaker 1: me on a helicopter flight to get back there with 383 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:39,439 Speaker 1: my soldiers. Unfortunately, Greg was killed in twenty twelve in 384 00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: Afghanistan while operating with his Special Forces team. But Greg 385 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,439 Speaker 1: got me back out there. I couldn't go out on 386 00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:49,720 Speaker 1: any missions. But we're working with the Special Forces. We're 387 00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:53,280 Speaker 1: working with the Seals, which meant we had bigger budgets, 388 00:21:53,280 --> 00:21:56,320 Speaker 1: which meant we had satellites, which meant we had fast Internet. 389 00:21:56,359 --> 00:22:00,280 Speaker 1: So I started plugging away at online college classes while 390 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:02,360 Speaker 1: I'm in a mud hut in the middle of nowhere, Afghanistan. 391 00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:04,640 Speaker 1: And so I finished two years of college classes while 392 00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:08,520 Speaker 1: I was in just because I wanted to challenge myself 393 00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:12,160 Speaker 1: and accomplish something improve people wrong, and so I got 394 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:15,560 Speaker 1: out December two thousand and eight. January two thousand and nine, 395 00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:17,440 Speaker 1: I was sitting in the college classroom with a bunch 396 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:20,199 Speaker 1: eighteen nineteen year old kids, and you know, I was 397 00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:22,399 Speaker 1: twenty six at the time. I felt like I was 398 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:26,360 Speaker 1: that kind of old weird man on campus. But twenty 399 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:29,959 Speaker 1: six is still pretty young, you know. I double majored, 400 00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:32,560 Speaker 1: I went got that master's degree, and then, you know, 401 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:35,879 Speaker 1: just a few years ago, I went and finished another 402 00:22:35,920 --> 00:22:40,200 Speaker 1: master's degree in organization development from Pepperdine and again really 403 00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:43,680 Speaker 1: driven by that sense of wanting to accomplish something and 404 00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:47,240 Speaker 1: showing people that I can do it, and not only 405 00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:49,920 Speaker 1: showing people that you can do it. And I feel 406 00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:51,960 Speaker 1: like were we come from the same spot and you 407 00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:54,119 Speaker 1: may agree with me here, it's showing other people like 408 00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:57,800 Speaker 1: us they can do it too. Absolutely, Yeah, definitely, it's 409 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:02,640 Speaker 1: you know, being that I like holding up that mirror 410 00:23:02,680 --> 00:23:05,080 Speaker 1: to other people and saying like, look, if I can 411 00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:08,000 Speaker 1: overcome this, I know that you can too. And yeah, 412 00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:09,600 Speaker 1: you know what, it's going to be hard, and it's 413 00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:11,360 Speaker 1: going to take a lot of hard work and it's 414 00:23:11,400 --> 00:23:14,160 Speaker 1: not going to be handed to you, but you can 415 00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:16,840 Speaker 1: do it. If they're young, people listening to this right 416 00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:20,639 Speaker 1: now who are considering enlisting and they're they're moved by 417 00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:23,840 Speaker 1: your story. What advice would you give them about enlisting? 418 00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:26,960 Speaker 1: I would ask him, what do you want to do 419 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:31,000 Speaker 1: in life? Like you what's your dream and whatever it is, 420 00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:34,600 Speaker 1: go for it, like you got one shot at this 421 00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:37,520 Speaker 1: life you're on Earth. And if it is joining the military, 422 00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:40,000 Speaker 1: if you want to go shoot some guns, go for it. 423 00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:42,639 Speaker 1: Do it now. If you want to work for the 424 00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:45,280 Speaker 1: CIA someday or FBI, you know, and you want to 425 00:23:45,280 --> 00:23:49,240 Speaker 1: go into intelligence, do that. If you're eighteen years old, 426 00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:52,879 Speaker 1: you don't have to have everything figured out. I mean, 427 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:55,600 Speaker 1: it took me to tell us about thirty one to 428 00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,760 Speaker 1: kind of realize what I wanted to do with my life. 429 00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,119 Speaker 1: So if you don't know, just go out there and 430 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:03,520 Speaker 1: soak in different experiences, whether it is the military or 431 00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:07,480 Speaker 1: volunteering for different organizations. Because you know, when I got out, 432 00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:11,640 Speaker 1: I first wanted to work in professional sports. I got 433 00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:15,479 Speaker 1: a master's screen sport management. I was very fortunate to 434 00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:18,960 Speaker 1: be named that NFL Tillman's Scholar, and I went to 435 00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:21,800 Speaker 1: work for the Minnesota Vikings, my hometown football team. What 436 00:24:21,920 --> 00:24:24,760 Speaker 1: I thought was going to be my dream job, and 437 00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,200 Speaker 1: it turned out it wasn't and it wasn't for me. 438 00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:29,480 Speaker 1: So you don't have to have it all figured out. 439 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:32,000 Speaker 1: If you want to join the military, do your research, 440 00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:34,560 Speaker 1: figure out what branch is going to be best for 441 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:38,240 Speaker 1: you with what you want to do, and do it. 442 00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 1: But my recommendation is if you join the army and 443 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:45,600 Speaker 1: make sure you become a paratrooper. What do you miss 444 00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:49,000 Speaker 1: most about being in the military. I missed the people, 445 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,679 Speaker 1: and I also missed the mission. Obviously, there's a lot 446 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,520 Speaker 1: of politics at play when it comes to the conflicts 447 00:24:54,520 --> 00:24:57,280 Speaker 1: that are going on, and that's not something that I 448 00:24:57,280 --> 00:25:00,679 Speaker 1: thought about when I was in But I the impact 449 00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:02,639 Speaker 1: that we had on local people and when it was 450 00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:04,360 Speaker 1: in Iraq, when I was there, and when I went 451 00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:09,800 Speaker 1: to Afghanistan, and that is such a humbling feeling that 452 00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:14,400 Speaker 1: allows me to still keep things in perspective to this 453 00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:17,800 Speaker 1: day thinking about those people in the lives that they 454 00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:20,760 Speaker 1: have and all the blessings. You know, again, I lost 455 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:24,680 Speaker 1: my job in February, but I'm going to be okay. 456 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:28,800 Speaker 1: I'm not living in a war torn country, so it 457 00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:32,480 Speaker 1: just makes me continue to remain grateful. How would you 458 00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:36,960 Speaker 1: encourage someone because this for us is inspired by Veterans Day. Obviously, 459 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:41,160 Speaker 1: how would you encourage someone to go about celebrating Veterans 460 00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:47,120 Speaker 1: Day or what can we actually do? Not just think 461 00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:50,800 Speaker 1: and feel? And that's level one for sure, but what 462 00:25:50,880 --> 00:25:54,520 Speaker 1: can we also do? Level two? Yeah, I like that 463 00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:58,080 Speaker 1: you put it like that, Bobby, because words are nice, 464 00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:02,480 Speaker 1: they're great, but what sort of action can you take? 465 00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 1: And so my recommendation is to get involved with some 466 00:26:07,119 --> 00:26:09,919 Speaker 1: type of organization if you support veterans, if it's a 467 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:13,800 Speaker 1: cause that you're passionate about, whether it's going to the 468 00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 1: VA and visiting with some of the patients there, or 469 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,440 Speaker 1: one of the many veteran service organizations out there, the VFW, 470 00:26:21,600 --> 00:26:24,840 Speaker 1: the American Legion that unfortunately I am really struggling with 471 00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:29,399 Speaker 1: membership with this younger generation of veterans. I encourage people 472 00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:33,440 Speaker 1: get involved in you know, yeah, he's here on Veterans Day, 473 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,520 Speaker 1: that's kind of the obviously a prime time to thank 474 00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:39,280 Speaker 1: a vet, but then that sort of just fades away 475 00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:42,240 Speaker 1: after a while. I like to say, for my you know, 476 00:26:42,240 --> 00:26:46,000 Speaker 1: there's a lot of gold star mothers and brothers and 477 00:26:46,080 --> 00:26:48,720 Speaker 1: sisters and fathers out there, and I know plenty of 478 00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:53,359 Speaker 1: them that Memorial Days every day for them, and the 479 00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:55,399 Speaker 1: same thing applies for me for Veterans Day. It might 480 00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:58,560 Speaker 1: be the middle of June and hey it's not Veterans 481 00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:01,480 Speaker 1: Day today, but going to do something for a veteran anyways. 482 00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:05,320 Speaker 1: You know. I've found my ability to do that through 483 00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:08,280 Speaker 1: my affiliation with an organization called Tee It Up for 484 00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:11,760 Speaker 1: the Troops. They hold golf events across the country raising 485 00:27:11,800 --> 00:27:15,119 Speaker 1: money for wounded veterans. And I had never swung a 486 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,440 Speaker 1: golf club again, like growing up like we did. I'd 487 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:20,640 Speaker 1: never swung a golf club in my life until I 488 00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:24,600 Speaker 1: was twenty seven years old, and they put a set 489 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:27,800 Speaker 1: of golf clubs in my hands, and I fell in 490 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:31,679 Speaker 1: love with the game. And I'm a terrible golfer, but 491 00:27:31,720 --> 00:27:34,800 Speaker 1: I found it as a therapeutic outlet just to kind 492 00:27:34,800 --> 00:27:36,760 Speaker 1: of take my mind off of all the other things 493 00:27:36,760 --> 00:27:40,119 Speaker 1: that were going on. That's the one organization that I 494 00:27:40,200 --> 00:27:43,679 Speaker 1: really will bend over backwards for and do anything that 495 00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:47,560 Speaker 1: I can to help them further their cause. So tell 496 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:50,439 Speaker 1: me about life now and what you're doing, and how 497 00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:52,520 Speaker 1: do you see the lessons and values that you've learned 498 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:56,879 Speaker 1: influencing and impacting your journey as it continues. Yeah, life 499 00:27:56,960 --> 00:28:00,560 Speaker 1: is great. It's been a challenge again losing your job. February, 500 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:02,840 Speaker 1: my wife and I were in the middle of the 501 00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:07,200 Speaker 1: adoption process. We have two beautiful biological girls and we 502 00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:09,959 Speaker 1: had just in January, we went through what's known as 503 00:28:09,960 --> 00:28:14,719 Speaker 1: a failed match. We lost fifteen thousand dollars, which is 504 00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,680 Speaker 1: a significant amount of money for anybody, but what hurt 505 00:28:18,720 --> 00:28:22,320 Speaker 1: the most was the emotional investment. And then I go 506 00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:25,919 Speaker 1: ahead and lose my job, and we have to decide 507 00:28:25,960 --> 00:28:28,320 Speaker 1: if we want to continue on with this adoption journey, 508 00:28:28,320 --> 00:28:32,480 Speaker 1: which is expensive, and you know, we make the decision 509 00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:35,080 Speaker 1: to continue on, I start trying to make a go 510 00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:38,400 Speaker 1: of it on my own to be able to speak 511 00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:42,360 Speaker 1: to others to help them develop as leaders. And in 512 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:45,440 Speaker 1: May we welcomed a beautiful baby girl by the name 513 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:48,440 Speaker 1: of Haven that we adopted, and she has just been 514 00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:52,040 Speaker 1: the light of our life through these challenging times that 515 00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:57,000 Speaker 1: everybody's going through, and we definitely look forward to adopting again. 516 00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:59,920 Speaker 1: We have so much love to give. It's always been 517 00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:01,920 Speaker 1: in our dream too. You know. We just want to 518 00:29:02,640 --> 00:29:04,560 Speaker 1: build a big house in the country and fill it 519 00:29:04,600 --> 00:29:07,719 Speaker 1: full of kids and fill it full of love. My 520 00:29:07,760 --> 00:29:10,680 Speaker 1: wife had a very normal childhood growing up. I didn't. 521 00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 1: I didn't have one of those safe places where you 522 00:29:12,800 --> 00:29:14,720 Speaker 1: could bring friends over to hang out and play a 523 00:29:14,800 --> 00:29:17,120 Speaker 1: video game or whatever. And so we really want to 524 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:20,800 Speaker 1: create that opportunity for kids to be that place where 525 00:29:20,880 --> 00:29:22,560 Speaker 1: you're not worried about where your kids at on a 526 00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:24,760 Speaker 1: Friday night. It is they're all you know, at the 527 00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,840 Speaker 1: Nelson House, hanging out at the sport court, playing basketball 528 00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:31,920 Speaker 1: or whatever. And so really that's what drives me as 529 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:35,440 Speaker 1: my family and taking care and providing for them and 530 00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:40,800 Speaker 1: doing meaningful work. How pivotal was your wife in your process? 531 00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:49,160 Speaker 1: I think I would have committed suicide if it wasn't 532 00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:52,479 Speaker 1: for her. I don't think that I would be alive 533 00:29:53,480 --> 00:29:59,520 Speaker 1: today if it wasn't for her, because I struggled and 534 00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:04,000 Speaker 1: I kept a lot of those struggles internal and I 535 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:10,320 Speaker 1: didn't share those with anybody. And yeah, man, if if 536 00:30:10,360 --> 00:30:12,600 Speaker 1: it wasn't her for her, I don't think i'd be 537 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,920 Speaker 1: here as a dad, just as a dad. What what's 538 00:30:16,920 --> 00:30:19,680 Speaker 1: your goal? My goal is to spend as much time 539 00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:22,800 Speaker 1: with my kids as possible. And that's another thing. The 540 00:30:23,400 --> 00:30:26,560 Speaker 1: career that I've chosen and that I feel like has 541 00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:31,240 Speaker 1: also chosen me provides me that flexibility. You know, I 542 00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:34,480 Speaker 1: encourage everybody do do whatever makes you happy. And this 543 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:36,760 Speaker 1: is what makes me happy because I have that flexibility 544 00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:38,440 Speaker 1: where if I want to go play at the park 545 00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:42,040 Speaker 1: with my girls all afternoon, I can do that. They're 546 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:45,440 Speaker 1: only young once. And it's just having kids is so awesome. 547 00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,880 Speaker 1: And Bobby, I just I know you got engaged recently, 548 00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:53,440 Speaker 1: so congratulations. And you know, if you end up having 549 00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:55,960 Speaker 1: a family, I think you're gonna feel that as well 550 00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:59,000 Speaker 1: and just be be an awesome dad, I hope. So 551 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:00,920 Speaker 1: you know, I was always and still am a bit 552 00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:03,080 Speaker 1: scared to have kids because I had no I didn't 553 00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:04,959 Speaker 1: have parents, so I don't know if I know how 554 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,240 Speaker 1: to parent. You know, I didn't have a safe place 555 00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:09,800 Speaker 1: much like you. So to hear your story and to 556 00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:13,080 Speaker 1: hear you love me and a dad and want more kids, 557 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:16,480 Speaker 1: and like that's inspiring for a guy like me. Well, 558 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:18,600 Speaker 1: you know, I like to say I was taught exactly 559 00:31:18,640 --> 00:31:21,239 Speaker 1: what not to do. I learned exactly what not to 560 00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:23,400 Speaker 1: do from those I had in my life. But at 561 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:27,360 Speaker 1: the same time, too, I understood the power of positive 562 00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:30,280 Speaker 1: people around me and surrounding myself with them. And seeing 563 00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:33,240 Speaker 1: what it can be like. And so I've been able 564 00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:36,040 Speaker 1: to take that and use that to shape me as 565 00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,480 Speaker 1: a father, and you'll get through a lot of learning 566 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:42,840 Speaker 1: experiences obviously too. I have really enjoyed talking with you. 567 00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:46,720 Speaker 1: I mean that as as sincerely as I possibly can. 568 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:50,200 Speaker 1: So thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for 569 00:31:50,280 --> 00:31:54,080 Speaker 1: sharing your knowledge and your advice, and for continuing to 570 00:31:54,240 --> 00:31:57,280 Speaker 1: want to do that because I can tell you from experience, 571 00:31:57,440 --> 00:31:58,800 Speaker 1: it ain't a easy thing to want to talk to 572 00:31:58,840 --> 00:32:00,960 Speaker 1: folks because not everybody wants to always hear you want 573 00:32:01,000 --> 00:32:02,640 Speaker 1: they don't want to listen to your story. But when 574 00:32:02,680 --> 00:32:07,800 Speaker 1: you connect, it is worth its weight in whatever currency 575 00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,040 Speaker 1: you want to spend. And so you're gonna it's gonna 576 00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,040 Speaker 1: be so great for you because I can just tell 577 00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,880 Speaker 1: that that fulfills you to help others. So thank you 578 00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:18,920 Speaker 1: again and the best best wishes to you and your 579 00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:21,640 Speaker 1: wife and all your kids. Thank you very much, Bobby. 580 00:32:21,680 --> 00:32:25,760 Speaker 1: I appreciate the opportunity. It's been fantastic, So thank you 581 00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:30,080 Speaker 1: very much, and again, congratulations on depending nuptials. Enjoy it. Man. 582 00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:35,760 Speaker 1: I want to thank Patrick for his bravery and dedication 583 00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:38,360 Speaker 1: and service and for the work he does today carrying 584 00:32:38,360 --> 00:32:41,160 Speaker 1: out the memory of those who have made the ultimate sacrifice. 585 00:32:41,600 --> 00:32:44,480 Speaker 1: I encourage you to follow Patrick Nelson on Instagram. He's 586 00:32:44,800 --> 00:32:49,440 Speaker 1: at Patrick Jay Nelson nineteen eighty three. Thanks for listening 587 00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:51,800 Speaker 1: to BETS you Should Know. Check out our other episodes 588 00:32:51,800 --> 00:32:54,760 Speaker 1: from more great stories from inspiring bets like Patrick who 589 00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:58,120 Speaker 1: continue to work selflessly and tirelessly in civilian life to 590 00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:00,720 Speaker 1: make positive change. If you like much you heard, please 591 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,240 Speaker 1: rate and review the podcast. We want to hear from 592 00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:06,360 Speaker 1: you and don't forget to subscribe for free or follow 593 00:33:06,360 --> 00:33:10,640 Speaker 1: the show on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever 594 00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:13,120 Speaker 1: you listen to your podcasts. VET you Should Know is 595 00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:16,400 Speaker 1: a special four part series podcast from iHeartRadio hosted by 596 00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:18,760 Speaker 1: me Bobby Bones. Our show has written and produced by 597 00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:22,720 Speaker 1: Molly Sosha, Andy Kelly, Ethan Fixell in partnership with Haley 598 00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,760 Speaker 1: Ericson and Garrett Shannon of Banter Edit, sound design and 599 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:28,920 Speaker 1: mixed by Matt Stillo and my personal producer and hero 600 00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:29,640 Speaker 1: is Mike d