1 00:00:03,320 --> 00:00:05,519 Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast, 2 00:00:05,760 --> 00:00:19,720 Speaker 1: Firm Elvis Presents fifteen Minute Show. It is the fifteen 3 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,840 Speaker 1: minute morning show podcast. Let's go. We got a full house. 4 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:24,400 Speaker 1: We got Froggy, we got Scary, we got Nate, we 5 00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:27,560 Speaker 1: got Scotty b I see Danielle, there's Gandhi, there's Garrett, 6 00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:34,760 Speaker 1: there's Dave Rody. It's opening day baseball. Yes, you guys 7 00:00:34,760 --> 00:00:36,440 Speaker 1: would be excited. I mean, I'm not a sports fan, 8 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:40,479 Speaker 1: but I thought you guys to you and Brody love 9 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:43,559 Speaker 1: the Mets. Yes, I'm a baseball fan, Elvis. But over 10 00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:47,040 Speaker 1: the last few years it's gotten boring. It's just it 11 00:00:47,120 --> 00:00:52,120 Speaker 1: really it is. Well, let's find out why it feels 12 00:00:52,159 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 1: that way. Why is that for you? Garrett three and 13 00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:57,120 Speaker 1: a half to four hours. It's it's like going to 14 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 1: the Batman and watching that, like it takes up so 15 00:01:00,040 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: much time, Like going to the game is different, Like, 16 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:04,360 Speaker 1: but you can't go to the game for a hundred 17 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:07,039 Speaker 1: and eighty two games. I'm I'm for the fact that 18 00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:09,160 Speaker 1: maybe if they just cut the season in half, give 19 00:01:09,240 --> 00:01:12,279 Speaker 1: us eighty games as opposed to a hundred and sixty two, 20 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:15,160 Speaker 1: it might be a little bit more fun. With you Garrett, 21 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:17,480 Speaker 1: I don't like baseball at all. I'm just quiet when 22 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:19,479 Speaker 1: everybody gets excited because I don't want to yell there, young, 23 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:21,640 Speaker 1: but I feel it's like the most sporing sport on 24 00:01:21,680 --> 00:01:30,160 Speaker 1: the whole planet. Golf is above baseball. Are you kidding? 25 00:01:30,200 --> 00:01:32,080 Speaker 1: I met more people watch the Masters this week than 26 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:38,119 Speaker 1: watch golf ball. Oh possibly, but that's only because it's 27 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:44,119 Speaker 1: the Masters game. Oh that's right, that's a pretty big story. 28 00:01:45,360 --> 00:01:47,640 Speaker 1: I can't wait to go to the ballpark and have 29 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:50,760 Speaker 1: a hot dog and a warm beer a baseball game. 30 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:53,560 Speaker 1: And you can talk unlike golf, which quiet place, and 31 00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:56,360 Speaker 1: baseball and you're getting it all wrong, Garrett. It's not 32 00:01:56,400 --> 00:01:59,960 Speaker 1: about watching the action necessarily. It's about the environment you're 33 00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: and it's about having stadium. They okay, that's going to 34 00:02:03,840 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 1: that's going to the game. That's going to the game, 35 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:07,520 Speaker 1: and you knowing in us here so you can sit 36 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,960 Speaker 1: behind home place. So we're talking about watching things on TV. 37 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:12,160 Speaker 1: Are going to the game. The majority of people are 38 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:15,079 Speaker 1: going to watch the game. And and I think it's 39 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,760 Speaker 1: boring there. There's no way everyone sits there. A normal 40 00:02:17,800 --> 00:02:21,280 Speaker 1: person sits there for almost four hours and watches all 41 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,680 Speaker 1: nine innings. You probably don't want to get stuff done. 42 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,080 Speaker 1: You like go around the house, do things you know, 43 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:28,720 Speaker 1: you order, yeah, you eat, you go to the bathroom 44 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:33,720 Speaker 1: watching passive like Daniellis say, yes, I think if you 45 00:02:33,840 --> 00:02:37,240 Speaker 1: like with sport, sorry, you know, like a sport, you're 46 00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:40,320 Speaker 1: into it, right, yeah, like Danielle's husband and her family 47 00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 1: like soccer. Right, soccer can go three hours and nobody scores, 48 00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:47,840 Speaker 1: Like nothing happens, but people go crazy because there's a 49 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:51,000 Speaker 1: lot of almost. So baseball is a game of almost 50 00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:53,120 Speaker 1: you look for the art form of it, and you 51 00:02:53,120 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 1: you appreciate what's going on. It's like watching the drama 52 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,160 Speaker 1: you don't you don't watch Ozark and hoping someone gets 53 00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:00,320 Speaker 1: shot in the head every second, but what it happens. 54 00:03:00,360 --> 00:03:03,320 Speaker 1: It's nice song ended a tie too, and people are 55 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:06,520 Speaker 1: still like, yo, okay, you know a shot in the 56 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,679 Speaker 1: head every second, which is if you looked at it, 57 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:12,360 Speaker 1: if you look at everyone in this zoom room, or 58 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:14,800 Speaker 1: if you're listening to us on this podcast. There are 59 00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:19,119 Speaker 1: different people with different degrees of sports. Um fan, dumb, 60 00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:23,000 Speaker 1: dumb whatever, Gandhi and I just not into sports as much, 61 00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:26,959 Speaker 1: I guess, right, Like what, yeah, I like football, I 62 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:30,560 Speaker 1: like basketball. I like soccer, golf, tennis. I honestly like, 63 00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:32,800 Speaker 1: I will watch almost any sport. When the Olympics are on, 64 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 1: love it, mm a, fighting, love it. Baseball for me 65 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:38,920 Speaker 1: just kills me. And I thought it was one of 66 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,400 Speaker 1: those things that maybe you had to be there too. 67 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:42,720 Speaker 1: I actually went to a World Series game when the 68 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,680 Speaker 1: Marlins were playing and they went into extra innings and 69 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: I was ready to just roll out of the seat. 70 00:03:51,200 --> 00:03:54,600 Speaker 1: I was like, this misery. Marlins beat the Yankees for 71 00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: the World Series. I don't even remember it was the first. 72 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 1: I guess it fair to say that I'm the least 73 00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 1: sports guyt Yeah, I've got some good comports. The Elvis. 74 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:11,640 Speaker 1: You go to basketball games. That's much more than Scotty 75 00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:13,360 Speaker 1: would do. No, you know, I tell you what, Like 76 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:16,640 Speaker 1: I watched the what was it, the eight thing? The 77 00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 1: basketball things, Yeah, because I like tea, Yeah, Michael Jordan 78 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:27,880 Speaker 1: documentary when local, when local teams are in, you know, 79 00:04:27,960 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 1: the big end things I watched. So I don't know 80 00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:34,559 Speaker 1: if this whole room knows it, but Scotty be actually 81 00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:38,640 Speaker 1: used to be a sports reporter. Album Carrott, you were 82 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:41,240 Speaker 1: a sports reporter and you hated sports. No, I was 83 00:04:41,279 --> 00:04:42,840 Speaker 1: I was like eight years old and I wrote an 84 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:47,120 Speaker 1: article about the Rangers and the penny save. Okay, that's look. 85 00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:50,320 Speaker 1: If I'm at a basketball game, if I'm at a 86 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:53,080 Speaker 1: football game, I'm okay. But the baseball games I've gone to, 87 00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,359 Speaker 1: I enjoyed being outside for a while, but there was 88 00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:59,359 Speaker 1: mike clock ended before the games clock. I'm like, I 89 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:01,960 Speaker 1: was ready to get You have to admit, I mean 90 00:05:02,080 --> 00:05:06,160 Speaker 1: baseball it is a little slow compared to like hockey, 91 00:05:06,320 --> 00:05:09,679 Speaker 1: which is NonStop, in soccer, which is non stopping football. 92 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:13,479 Speaker 1: I mean, I do love baseball, but it definitely is slower. 93 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:16,719 Speaker 1: That is the problem, Danielle, that everyone's talking about is 94 00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:20,520 Speaker 1: the declining you know, member, you know, declining attendance and 95 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:24,320 Speaker 1: all that and interest with younger audiences because everyone's so 96 00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:27,400 Speaker 1: used to the I need action now to play. I 97 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:29,800 Speaker 1: need home runs, I need strikeouts, I need this. I 98 00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:32,760 Speaker 1: need to and and unfortunately it doesn't. It pals in 99 00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:35,720 Speaker 1: comparients comparisons to other sports, and it pals in comparisons 100 00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:38,800 Speaker 1: to how people are living their lives within this fast paced, 101 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:42,520 Speaker 1: on demand world that we're in. Yes, agreed, I love here. 102 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:44,600 Speaker 1: I love going to games. I love to actually go 103 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,400 Speaker 1: watch games. But in my head, I'm like, we gotta 104 00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:47,880 Speaker 1: get out of here before it's over, because it's gonna 105 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:49,480 Speaker 1: be traffic, it's gonna be people. I don't want to 106 00:05:49,480 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: get stuck in all this stuff. So I mean I left. 107 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:54,520 Speaker 1: I left some World Series game, like the Yankees were 108 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:55,920 Speaker 1: in the World Series. It was tied up. It was 109 00:05:55,960 --> 00:06:00,120 Speaker 1: like game six or something like, we gotta go in 110 00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:08,279 Speaker 1: the World Series. Whatever. What an idiot, Yes, that'll go 111 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: to England. When he went to when we went to 112 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,800 Speaker 1: the Super Bowl, I'm like, I don't care what happens, 113 00:06:13,839 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: and we're staying till the end and we will just 114 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:19,240 Speaker 1: sit here and watch the celebration. We were one of 115 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: the last people to leave the stadium. Like they literally 116 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:23,080 Speaker 1: were coming around saying, okay, now you have to leave. 117 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,599 Speaker 1: That's how long we sat there. So we missed the crowd, 118 00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:27,760 Speaker 1: the traffic, everything because we just sat there. I would 119 00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,880 Speaker 1: do that, Yeah, I'd wait way after. I've actually had 120 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:33,159 Speaker 1: another experience at a baseball game with Scotty b. I 121 00:06:33,200 --> 00:06:35,160 Speaker 1: caught a foul ball while sitting with Scotty be at 122 00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:39,440 Speaker 1: a at a baseball game. I bring you good Yeah 123 00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:42,520 Speaker 1: at City Field. Yeah, he's picking Scotty b what were 124 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:47,320 Speaker 1: you talking about earlier about putting your dick in in butter? Butter? 125 00:06:47,520 --> 00:06:50,359 Speaker 1: Scary came in to get some butter and there was 126 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,320 Speaker 1: a big, giant container of butter and only a tiny 127 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,120 Speaker 1: bit left in the bottom, and it's been there for 128 00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:55,960 Speaker 1: a while, Like, I would never use that because at 129 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,279 Speaker 1: some point somebody has stuck something in there in the 130 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: time that the butter was opened until that amount was left. 131 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:03,919 Speaker 1: You specifically said you know how dicks have been in 132 00:07:03,960 --> 00:07:06,440 Speaker 1: that butter, as though you okay, well, that's just you know, 133 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:08,640 Speaker 1: that's just the thing that I say. I don't think 134 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:11,120 Speaker 1: there's actually a ton of dicks in there, but I 135 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 1: feel like somebody stuck something in there that shouldn't have 136 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:16,680 Speaker 1: been in there that you don't want your equivalent on 137 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:23,960 Speaker 1: the curtains and a hotel for yourself. Nobody does ever, 138 00:07:25,560 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: But Scotty, why do you always go to dicks like 139 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:31,480 Speaker 1: like any just to say, I don't know. You also 140 00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 1: really can't stick like a vagina, but I guess you 141 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:39,560 Speaker 1: could when it's brand new. But does it look like 142 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 1: there was a no, No, Danielle, it was a little 143 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:47,840 Speaker 1: lump of butter on the bottom all by itself butter. 144 00:07:47,920 --> 00:07:50,480 Speaker 1: That was it. All I did was I stuck my 145 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:53,080 Speaker 1: maza in it to scrape out what was left, and 146 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:56,480 Speaker 1: that was Are you implying the butter is batter? Well, no, 147 00:07:56,760 --> 00:08:00,160 Speaker 1: he defiled the butter with his maza that he double dipped. No, 148 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:02,440 Speaker 1: because it was the end of the contain. There's a 149 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:06,000 Speaker 1: big difference between Matza. Hey, hey, big difference between Matza 150 00:08:06,080 --> 00:08:11,680 Speaker 1: and penis what kind of people do you think we 151 00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:16,840 Speaker 1: work with that they put their in the butter? I 152 00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:18,960 Speaker 1: don't know. I just think people do things. That's it. 153 00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:20,960 Speaker 1: I don't I don't trust people. Go back to Dick's 154 00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:25,400 Speaker 1: for a second. So this just actually changed. So everyone 155 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:27,920 Speaker 1: knows Dicks Sporting Goods and for the longest time, if 156 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:30,280 Speaker 1: you typed in Dicks, you actually got what you typed in. 157 00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:32,200 Speaker 1: But now if you type in Dicks dot com, you 158 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:35,280 Speaker 1: actually go to Dicks Sporting Goods. So they actually paid 159 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:42,320 Speaker 1: for the rights to have Dicks dot com oh store. Yeah, seriously, 160 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:44,400 Speaker 1: that was I was curious how much they actually paid 161 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,800 Speaker 1: the guy who owned that that They never had that website. 162 00:08:47,840 --> 00:08:50,520 Speaker 1: They never had Dicks dot com. Now, Dix was a 163 00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:56,319 Speaker 1: thing before Dix was a thing. You know what I mean, oh, okay, yeah, okay, 164 00:08:57,840 --> 00:09:00,960 Speaker 1: I want to I bet you if you google dicks 165 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:02,880 Speaker 1: and food or something like that, you'll see a whole 166 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:05,840 Speaker 1: slew of people putting their penises and things. You can 167 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:13,440 Speaker 1: google anything, probably, but you think it's going to he 168 00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,080 Speaker 1: got dick, sporting goods and butter and how many pictures 169 00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:19,640 Speaker 1: at you know, the whole that's saying. We don't see 170 00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,920 Speaker 1: the world as the world is. We see the world 171 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,880 Speaker 1: as we are. So every time Scotty talks about there's 172 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:26,480 Speaker 1: been a dick in that, all I think is all 173 00:09:26,559 --> 00:09:29,200 Speaker 1: the things that Scotty has probably put his dinger in. 174 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:35,120 Speaker 1: Have you ever put your dinger in any food product? Ever? Never? Never? 175 00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:40,200 Speaker 1: That would be silly. Have you ever put a food products? 176 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:42,880 Speaker 1: Had sex with cereal? I've never had sex with cereal. 177 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:47,319 Speaker 1: Have you done a fruit loop cereal? That would be 178 00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:51,080 Speaker 1: trouble Elvis. What did you find? I think that would 179 00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:53,319 Speaker 1: like hurt your penis? A fruit loop because it's very 180 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:59,720 Speaker 1: you know, Almus, what did you find? It's just a 181 00:09:59,720 --> 00:10:04,640 Speaker 1: bunch of food that's shaped like penises. Did you bookmark 182 00:10:05,160 --> 00:10:08,520 Speaker 1: to send that to me? Please? Speaking of food that's 183 00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:21,480 Speaker 1: shaped like penises, we were talking about Cavitelli today cavity. 184 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:32,840 Speaker 1: So it's called cavat elvises, cavatopi c A v A 185 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:36,120 Speaker 1: t A p p i cavatopi. But what's your point 186 00:10:36,440 --> 00:10:39,800 Speaker 1: it last night? Oh? Do you mean the one shaped 187 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:44,320 Speaker 1: like a pig's wiener? So then I googled pig penis 188 00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 1: and they are shaped like that. They're curly curly penises 189 00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:55,920 Speaker 1: tail tail. That was screwy noodles, Google, I'll put you 190 00:10:55,920 --> 00:10:57,920 Speaker 1: want me to put the image in the room here? 191 00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,360 Speaker 1: How do you use it now? But if you could 192 00:10:59,400 --> 00:11:03,400 Speaker 1: google pig penis and bottom, that'd be great. Hang on, 193 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:07,959 Speaker 1: I gotta be honest with you. The most shocking part 194 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 1: about this podcast in the Zoo room is that Elvis 195 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:14,760 Speaker 1: is still here. I tell you why. He's forced to me. 196 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:19,840 Speaker 1: I'm getting nothing nothing from this content. Nothing. It's just stupid. 197 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,600 Speaker 1: It's boring, just like basic. I mean, now you're getting 198 00:11:22,600 --> 00:11:27,679 Speaker 1: the pig penis. It's picking up a little bit big penis. 199 00:11:29,960 --> 00:11:35,760 Speaker 1: Everybody's looking Okay, yeah, it's it's cork screwed for a reason, 200 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:37,920 Speaker 1: I do believe. I think it's to keep the the 201 00:11:37,960 --> 00:11:49,240 Speaker 1: female from leaving. Leaving, Maybe consider having yours reshaped maybe 202 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:54,319 Speaker 1: it's to the pick and open up a bottle of wine. 203 00:11:54,800 --> 00:12:00,960 Speaker 1: You can call it a park screw, all right. I 204 00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:03,040 Speaker 1: think we should add on that, because they ain't gonna 205 00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:11,080 Speaker 1: get funny. Bye Bye The Fifteen Minute Morning Show.