Speaker 1: Hey everyone, I'm so excited because we're going to be
Speaker 1: adding a really special offering onto the back of my
Speaker 1: solo episodes on Fridays. The Daily Jay is a daily
Speaker 1: series on Calm and it's meant to inspire you while
Speaker 1: outlining tools and techniques to live a more mindful, stress
Speaker 1: free life. We dive into a range of topics and
Speaker 1: the best part is each episode is only seven minutes long,
Speaker 1: so you can incorporate it into your schedule no matter
Speaker 1: how busy you are. As a dedicated part of the
Speaker 1: on Purpose community, I wanted to do something special for
Speaker 1: you this year, so I'll be playing a handpicked Daily
Speaker 1: Jay during each of my Friday podcasts. This week, we're
Speaker 1: talking about your habits and how to develop better daily routines.
Speaker 1: Of course, if you want to listen to The Daily
Speaker 1: Jay every day, you can subscribe to Calm, So go
Speaker 1: to calm dot com forward slash Jay for forty percent
Speaker 1: off your membership today and welcome back to On Purpose,
Speaker 1: the number one health podcast in the world. Thanks to
Speaker 1: each and every one of you that come back every
Speaker 1: week to listen, learn and grow. Now, today's episode is
Speaker 1: all about something that I know has been at the
Speaker 1: forefront of so many of your minds. I've been reading
Speaker 1: comments sections, I've been talking to so many people as well,
Speaker 1: and I found that a lot of us will say
Speaker 1: that the two most common thoughts we have areried that
Speaker 1: anxious thoughts or worry filled thoughts, and I think a
Speaker 1: lot of us can relate to that. Right. I'm guessing
Speaker 1: that when you wake up, there may be an anxious thought.
Speaker 1: When you are preparing for something, there may be a
Speaker 1: worry thought. Maybe you're anxious about your own health and wellness,
Speaker 1: Maybe you're anxious about your work, Maybe you're worried about
Speaker 1: your family, Maybe you're worried about something that's happening in
Speaker 1: your area or maybe in the world. And I find
Speaker 1: that these thoughts are so common and so normal, yet
Speaker 1: we don't always have a game plan in order to
Speaker 1: work through them. And I think that's what's so important.
Speaker 1: I think we want to get to a point where
Speaker 1: we never have an anxious thought or never have a
Speaker 1: worry field thought. And the truth is that's just not possible.
Speaker 1: But what is possible is having a plan of action,
Speaker 1: having a game plan, having strategies and methods to actually overcome, transition,
Speaker 1: transform and break through from those thoughts and feelings, and
Speaker 1: that's what this episode is about. So if you're waking
Speaker 1: up with anxiety, if you're struggling to sleep because of worry,
Speaker 1: if you're someone who can see that when you're around
Speaker 1: a group of people, your anxiety and your nerves go
Speaker 1: through the roof. Maybe you're someone who worries all the
Speaker 1: time and gets pessimistic. This episode is for you. And
Speaker 1: maybe you have a friend who's dealing with this. Maybe
Speaker 1: you've had an episode recently where anxiety and worry came
Speaker 1: up in your life. I've had that where I think
Speaker 1: I'm completely anxiety free and then all of a sudden
Speaker 1: something happens, and that's my number one priority is being
Speaker 1: able to manage it. Can't wait for you to listen
Speaker 1: to this episode. Thanks for choosing on purpose. As always,
Speaker 1: I was reading this brilliant article on psych central dot
Speaker 1: com about anxiety and here with some of the stats
Speaker 1: that they shared. They said that more than thirty one
Speaker 1: percent of the US people will experience an anxiety disorder
Speaker 1: at some point in their lifetimes. Social anxiety disorder is
Speaker 1: one of the most common anxiety disorders, affecting around twelve
Speaker 1: percent of US adults at some point in their lives,
Speaker 1: and it went on to clarify that women are nearly
Speaker 1: twice as likely to develop an anxiety disorder compared with men,
Speaker 1: and that there are lots of different ways that anxiety
Speaker 1: makes us feel. For some of us, it can be
Speaker 1: excessive and consistent worrying. For some of us, it's restlessness, irritability,
Speaker 1: muscle tension, difficulty concentrating, sleep problems, fatigue, heart palpitation, sweating,
Speaker 1: and an upset stomach or nausea. Right. So it's really
Speaker 1: interesting because I think we often think of anxiety as like, Okay,
Speaker 1: it's all in my head. But as you can tell
Speaker 1: from this list that I found on psych Central, you
Speaker 1: actually see it manifesting very differently throughout the body. We've
Speaker 1: talked about everything from muscle tension through to an upset
Speaker 1: stomach or gut. We're talking about heart palpitations. So you're
Speaker 1: seeing that anxiety find its way throughout the body and
Speaker 1: finding a place to live. And so even if you're
Speaker 1: one of those people, I used to be someone who
Speaker 1: used to say, oh, I never get stressed, I don't
Speaker 1: have any of that, And then I started to realize
Speaker 1: that my body was storing it in a way that
Speaker 1: I wasn't even conscious and aware of because I wasn't
Speaker 1: present enough in my body. If I'm not present enough
Speaker 1: in my body, I'm not sure what I feel, where
Speaker 1: it came from, how long I've been feeling it, or
Speaker 1: how it developed. And so it's really interesting to remember
Speaker 1: that even if you're someone who's like, oh, Jay, I
Speaker 1: don't feel anxiety, that's not a challenge for me. It
Speaker 1: may be finding a home in your body in a
Speaker 1: different way. So it's a great thing to be aware of.
Speaker 1: The other fascinating thing I was reading an article on
Speaker 1: psychology today and it talked about this study that they
Speaker 1: did at Penn State University where researchers had participants write
Speaker 1: down their specific worries for ten days whenever they noticed it,
Speaker 1: and they were even sent a text message around four
Speaker 1: times a day to write down any worries from the
Speaker 1: past two hours to make sure that they could capture
Speaker 1: as many as possible now. The study participants then reviewed
Speaker 1: their list of worries every evening over the next thirty
Speaker 1: days to see if they came true and the worries
Speaker 1: were only worries that could be tested in the thirty days.
Speaker 1: For example, they used I'll fail my math exam tomorrow
Speaker 1: would be testable, whereas I'll develop cancer at some point
Speaker 1: would not be considered testable. The average person reported three
Speaker 1: to four testable worries per day. The result the research
Speaker 1: showed a wapping Ninety one percent of worries were false alarms,
Speaker 1: and of the remaining nine percent of worries that did
Speaker 1: come true, the outcome was better than expected about a
Speaker 1: third of the time, for about one in four participants,
Speaker 1: exactly zero of their worries materialized. This was a great
Speaker 1: article reviewed by Devin Fry if you want to check
Speaker 1: it out on Psychology Today. Written by Seth J. Gillian. So,
Speaker 1: what I just want to establish is that worry and
Speaker 1: anxiety are something that a lot of us are feeling.
Speaker 1: There are very different ways in which how it shows
Speaker 1: up in our life, so the language and the experience
Speaker 1: of it may be different, and on top of that,
Speaker 1: a lot of what we worry about doesn't always turn
Speaker 1: out to be true. Having said that, I want to
Speaker 1: give you some strategies and a game plan for dealing
Speaker 1: with your worries and anxieties because I want to help
Speaker 1: you transform those thoughts and overcome them. I had a
Speaker 1: really interesting experience of anxiety lately. I remember, before going
Speaker 1: on my world tour, I was so close to canceling
Speaker 1: it so many times because I found it overwhelming that
Speaker 1: I'd be doing all this travel back to back off
Speaker 1: the back of a press tour. I was genuinely quite
Speaker 1: anxious about it, if I'm completely honest with you all,
Speaker 1: and I thought about canceling it, and I thought about
Speaker 1: whether I'd be able to stay healthy. The whole time,
Speaker 1: I was worried about being away from RADI. I was
Speaker 1: worried about being away from my team and my work
Speaker 1: and my office. I was concerned that maybe I wouldn't
Speaker 1: be able to do it because I hadn't done it before,
Speaker 1: and so there were all these anxieties that I was feeling.
Speaker 1: And what's really interesting is that after rehearsing and after practicing,
Speaker 1: I felt great. But even the week let me just
Speaker 1: walk you through my schedule. So my book came out
Speaker 1: or announced on thirty first of January, I went on
Speaker 1: a three week press tour across New York, London, Mumbai,
Speaker 1: and la and then I had to go straight into
Speaker 1: rehearsals and then go on the US leg of the tour,
Speaker 1: and I was so close to falling ill. While I
Speaker 1: was rehearsing. My team Jordan saved my life literally with
Speaker 1: the amount of vitamins and supplements, and I was literally
Speaker 1: on everything I could possibly do to stay healthy, and
Speaker 1: those things really got me across the line. But I
Speaker 1: was nervous at that time too. And then when I
Speaker 1: was about to go on stage at my first show
Speaker 1: in Philadelphia, I walked onto the rehearsals and I felt
Speaker 1: so tight chested. I thought maybe I got COVID, or
Speaker 1: maybe there's some condition I'm struggling with. I remember feeling
Speaker 1: really uncomfortable. I then did the show that night in Philadelphia,
Speaker 1: was a great first show, and then a day later
Speaker 1: when we got to Boston, I felt it again. I
Speaker 1: felt the same uncomfortable, feeling tight chested. I was wondering
Speaker 1: what it was, and I remember speaking to my tour
Speaker 1: manager Tom about it, and I said to Tom, I said, Tom,
Speaker 1: I think, you know, I don't know what's going on.
Speaker 1: I'm just feeling a bit uncomfortable. And he said, well, Jay,
Speaker 1: you know it's probably anxiety and nerves. And I was like,
Speaker 1: I don't feel anxiety and nerves. I'm you know, I've
Speaker 1: spoken on stages a million times, and it was really
Speaker 1: interesting to me because he was like, Jay, you have,
Speaker 1: but this is different. This is your show, this is
Speaker 1: your tour. It's different. And so I was practicing my
Speaker 1: breath work exercises and then I had to go get
Speaker 1: checked in New York because I was so worried and
Speaker 1: I realized it was purely anxiety based. It was purely
Speaker 1: stress based. I was feeling so tight chested, and it
Speaker 1: went away after knowing that it wasn't anything more. But
Speaker 1: it's so interesting how we discount our experiences of overwhelm
Speaker 1: or stress or worry because we think of it as insignificant.
Speaker 1: We think that we should have had it figured out.
Speaker 1: So the first thing I want to talk to you
Speaker 1: about is studies show that we have around sixty to
Speaker 1: eighty thousand thoughts per day overwhelming already I know, and
Speaker 1: that eighty percent of those are repetitive and eighty percent
Speaker 1: of those are negative. We're often having the same thought
Speaker 1: throughout the day. A negative thought keeps on repeat on
Speaker 1: that cycle, and we have the same thought multiple times
Speaker 1: a day, adding up to a number of uncontrollable thoughts
Speaker 1: and here's my strategy for you. You can't change sixty
Speaker 1: to eighty thousand thoughts per day. It would be really
Speaker 1: tough to start thinking about how to be mindful about
Speaker 1: every thought. But here's something you can do. You can
Speaker 1: master your first and last thought of the day. Your
Speaker 1: first and last thought of the day can transform what
Speaker 1: happens in between. Right, we eat at three set times
Speaker 1: per day, or you eat at two set times per day,
Speaker 1: because that keeps you going and energized in between. Similarly,
Speaker 1: if we master and conquer our first thought of the
Speaker 1: day and the last thought of the day, so much
Speaker 1: can change. So here's what I want you to try.
Speaker 1: The first thing is don't look at your phone first
Speaker 1: thing in the morning and lasting at night, because your
Speaker 1: phone automatically inserts so many uncontrollable thoughts that you can't conquer. Right,
Speaker 1: you wake up in the morning and you see a
Speaker 1: news alert about something that happened in the world, and
Speaker 1: you go, gosh, that's already a negative start to the day.
Speaker 1: You wake up and you got a message from someone saying, hey,
Speaker 1: you haven't handed in that report yet. You're behind on
Speaker 1: work already. You've started a stream of negative thoughts. Now
Speaker 1: You're reactive for the rest of the day, trying to
Speaker 1: catch up, trying to make sure that you can solve
Speaker 1: all the other problems, not realizing that maybe if you
Speaker 1: gave yourself a head start, maybe if you felt calm
Speaker 1: and peaceful at the beginning of the day, now, when
Speaker 1: those things come at you, because of course they will,
Speaker 1: you'll be better prepared. So I find that master during
Speaker 1: your first and last thought of the day can be
Speaker 1: huge for me. The first thought of the day is
Speaker 1: usually a quote from my favorite book, a quote that
Speaker 1: I've scribbled on a post it note in maybe asking
Speaker 1: myself what am I grateful for? It's finding the first thing.
Speaker 1: All I want you to do is go what is
Speaker 1: the first thing I want to look at? What is
Speaker 1: the first thing I want to read? What is the
Speaker 1: first thing I want to think about that is going
Speaker 1: to transform the beginning of my day. It might even
Speaker 1: be a picture you want to see. The other thing
Speaker 1: I'm going to ask you to do is change your
Speaker 1: alarm tone. Often your alarm tone is so alarming that
Speaker 1: your first thought is urgency, emergency, alarm, alert, like all
Speaker 1: those words have so much fear attached them, like you're
Speaker 1: a fire alarm. It's scary. Why would you wake up
Speaker 1: to an alarm? Why would you wake up to an alert?
Speaker 1: All of these things make us have to be so
Speaker 1: on edge. They shift us into fight or flight mode,
Speaker 1: when actually, when you wake up, you want to wake
Speaker 1: up as if your eyes are just gently opening, right.
Speaker 1: Think about it? Do you like it when you wake
Speaker 1: up and your eyes are almost like shocked open, or
Speaker 1: when you get a moment to just gently, calmly open
Speaker 1: your eyes and let yourself become acquainted again with the
Speaker 1: light that's in the room. And it's so important to
Speaker 1: start that circadian rhythm by getting some natural sunlight. Right. So,
Speaker 1: one of the best ways, best strategies I know to
Speaker 1: deal with anxious thoughts and an anxious mindset is master
Speaker 1: the first and last thought of the day. My last
Speaker 1: thought of the day is often what am I most
Speaker 1: grateful for? My last thought of the day is what
Speaker 1: is an achievement? What is some progress I've made today?
Speaker 1: To give myself some encouragement and acknowledgment for what I've done.
Speaker 1: The second thing, this is something that I've used for
Speaker 1: years and it has really really helped me, and I
Speaker 1: found it helping me with a cold plunge. I found
Speaker 1: it helping with hikes, I found it helping with going
Speaker 1: on stage. It's breath work. I don't think we use
Speaker 1: our breath enough to define our life. Listen to this carefully.
Speaker 1: When you change the pace of your breath, you change
Speaker 1: the pace of your life. We don't realize how the
Speaker 1: pace of our breath is so interconnected to the pace
Speaker 1: of our life. If you find yourself rushing around, if
Speaker 1: you find yourself trying to do too many things, what
Speaker 1: happens The pace of your breath is fast, restless, and
Speaker 1: rushing as well. Whereas if you think about the best
Speaker 1: decisions you make in a calm, controlled environment, you'll find
Speaker 1: that your breath is deeper, slower, and your heart rate
Speaker 1: is slower as well. I think we've all experienced what
Speaker 1: panic feels like, what nerves feel like. You think about
Speaker 1: shallow breathing, you think about a fast heart rate, you
Speaker 1: think about being out of breath. Change the pace of
Speaker 1: your life by changing the pace of your breath. Anytime
Speaker 1: you feel out of breath, any time you feel behind,
Speaker 1: anytime you feel like you're rushing, it's because your heart
Speaker 1: rate and your breath rate are too high. You want
Speaker 1: to slow them down and get back in control. I
Speaker 1: looked at a study on Medical News today, and it's
Speaker 1: said that deliberately copying a relaxed breathing pattern seems to
Speaker 1: calm the nervous system that controls the body's involuntary functions.
Speaker 1: Controlled breathing can cause physiological changes that include lowered blood
Speaker 1: pressure and heart rate, reduced levels of stress hormones in
Speaker 1: the blood. So what you want to do is one
Speaker 1: of my favorite things is ocean breathing. And what I
Speaker 1: mean by that is you can find online or wherever
Speaker 1: it is, watching the ocean flow in and out and
Speaker 1: trying to deliberately copy that pace of breathing. Now, if
Speaker 1: you're not a visual person and you need to close
Speaker 1: your eyes, it's great to do this with account. I
Speaker 1: often breathe in for four and out for more than four.
Speaker 1: When you exhale for longer than you inhale, you relax
Speaker 1: your body and you slow your heart rate down. A
Speaker 1: few years ago I put this to the test where
Speaker 1: I actually sat right next to the bass drum of
Speaker 1: a heavy metal band, naturally listening to that music, and
Speaker 1: the fast pace my heart rates rocketed. My breathing was
Speaker 1: shallow and quick and in that I tried to control
Speaker 1: my breathing, and I had a heart rate monitor as well,
Speaker 1: and I was able to slow it down so that
Speaker 1: even in that high stress environment, I was able to
Speaker 1: reach a place of equanimity and calm. And so what
Speaker 1: I want to encourage you all to do is don't
Speaker 1: go sit next to a base drum, right, But I
Speaker 1: want you to take an opportunity to say, how much
Speaker 1: can you deliberately copy a relaxed breathing pattern? Where is
Speaker 1: there a pattern you can see? You may even breathe
Speaker 1: in and out from watching a flower move in your garden,
Speaker 1: a leaf moving from side to side. You may breathe
Speaker 1: as I said, for account of four in and an
Speaker 1: excel for more than four. Creating a pattern for your
Speaker 1: breath to follow will lower your heart rate, lower your
Speaker 1: breath rate, and actually give you an opportunity to cope
Speaker 1: with the feeling that you're going through. The study went
Speaker 1: on to say that breathing is closely linked the nervous system.
Speaker 1: Breathing exercises, especially those that emphasize extended controlled exhalation, activate
Speaker 1: the parasympathetic nervous system, which causes equal and opposite changes
Speaker 1: to the stress response, says doctor Kennedy. Deep controlled breathing
Speaker 1: with extended exhalation stimulates the vagus nerve, causing a fall
Speaker 1: in the heart rate and blood pressure, and when practiced regularly,
Speaker 1: feelings of calm and relaxation. I can't stress this to
Speaker 1: you enough about how important it is to regulate are breathing,
Speaker 1: how important it is to find a pace that works
Speaker 1: for you in that moment. The third strategy that has
Speaker 1: had a big impact on my life is the power
Speaker 1: of scent, and I think that it's such an underutilized
Speaker 1: part of managing our stress. There's a reason why spars,
Speaker 1: why sacred places relax us, There's a reason why we
Speaker 1: have candles because scent, and again, using that breath work
Speaker 1: to actually presently breathe in that scent can transform how
Speaker 1: you feel. Studies show that sense sends signals to our
Speaker 1: limbic system, which is the sector of the brain that
Speaker 1: controls memory and emotion. According to a twenty eleven study,
Speaker 1: positive emotions, which can be elicited by certain fragrances, have
Speaker 1: been proven to lower stress levels and improve overall mental outlook.
Speaker 1: I don't know if you've ever been for a massage
Speaker 1: and they offer you a series of sense and they
Speaker 1: ask you which one do you gravitate towards. And it's
Speaker 1: so easy in that moment to say, well, which one's
Speaker 1: good for me, as opposed to you just breathing them
Speaker 1: in and thinking, well, this one makes me feel good.
Speaker 1: And I realized this was something that Radi did in
Speaker 1: our home that honestly I just recommend is that Radi
Speaker 1: will have a different diffuser and essential oil for different
Speaker 1: spaces in our home. So whether we were in our
Speaker 1: tiny apartment in New York or whether we're in our
Speaker 1: home right now, different spaces have different scents. So the
Speaker 1: kitchen has a scent, the living room has a scent,
Speaker 1: our bedroom has a scent. And it's simply a diffuser
Speaker 1: with a couple of drops of essential oils that transform
Speaker 1: the environment, so as soon as you walk in, you
Speaker 1: get the benefit of how you want to feel in
Speaker 1: that space. Do not underestimate scent as a way of
Speaker 1: calming you down. Maybe even carry one with you. Sometimes
Speaker 1: I'll carry around peppermint oil with me. Sometimes I'll carry
Speaker 1: around a lavender scent which I find really good calming,
Speaker 1: or a sandal wood scent that I find calming simply
Speaker 1: to inhale and excel to aid that breath work by
Speaker 1: giving you another tool to help calm you down. Find
Speaker 1: the scent that helps calm you. Find the scent that
Speaker 1: helps energize you. Find the scent that helps relax you
Speaker 1: and maybe even puts you to sleep. Don't underestimate the
Speaker 1: power of scent. Along with that is the power of sound.
Speaker 1: A twenty sixteen study found that music preference was the
Speaker 1: most important factor in reducing stress levels. Listening to one
Speaker 1: of your favorite songs or music maybe a great short
Speaker 1: term way of dealing with stress. Often I find that
Speaker 1: music without lyrics, music whether it's jazz, classical music, and
Speaker 1: instrumental of just a piano or just a violin, can
Speaker 1: be so powerful for helping us realign again with the
Speaker 1: pace that we want to live at. So I want
Speaker 1: you to think about scent and sound really, really effectively.
Speaker 1: What song do you wake up to? What music do
Speaker 1: you drive to? What music do you walk and work
Speaker 1: out to? What music do you listen to when you
Speaker 1: are feeling stressed? Do you remember to switch something on?
Speaker 1: Maybe have a playlist that you've made specifically for when
Speaker 1: you feel this way, Like when we have a playlist
Speaker 1: for a workout. Right, you have a playlist that you
Speaker 1: listened to in the car. What's your playlist for when
Speaker 1: you're feeling anxious and stressed out? Design it when you're
Speaker 1: not anxious and stressed out, and it will help you
Speaker 1: massively when you are. And I really want to talk
Speaker 1: to you about site visualization was a big technique I
Speaker 1: used when I lived as a monk. I today visualize
Speaker 1: myself going on stages before I walk on. I visualized
Speaker 1: myself skydiving before I did that. I visualize myself going
Speaker 1: through challenging moments in my life that are far deeper
Speaker 1: and more high stakes than both of those that I
Speaker 1: just talked about now. And I found that when you
Speaker 1: live something out in a visualization, it allows you to
Speaker 1: feel the emotions. I was talking to rather recently and
Speaker 1: she was saying that she wanted to share something really emotional,
Speaker 1: and she was scared when she shares it when she's
Speaker 1: doing a talk, she may start crying. And I said
Speaker 1: to her, first of all, that's beautiful, but I understand
Speaker 1: you don't want to derail your whole presentation. And I
Speaker 1: said to that, practice and when you practice, allow yourself
Speaker 1: to cry. Allow yourself to feel so that you felt
Speaker 1: those emotions deeply. Now when you share it, you'll be
Speaker 1: able to not cry, but it will still be emotive
Speaker 1: and powerful for you. And so visualization and rehearsal. Visual
Speaker 1: rehearsal helps us deal with tough conversations, challenging moments. Maybe
Speaker 1: an awkward, uncomfortable interaction that you need to have with someone.
Speaker 1: Feel free to visualize not how it's going to go perfectly,
Speaker 1: but how you're going to behave when it goes imperfectly.
Speaker 1: I think that's the mistake we make with visualization. We
Speaker 1: try and visualize, Oh, it's going to work out, it's
Speaker 1: going to be amazing. I'm not recommending that. I'm recommending
Speaker 1: you visualize what you think is going to happen and
Speaker 1: how you're going to respond in that moment. That's what
Speaker 1: athletes do. They visualized driving around a racetrack, They visualized
Speaker 1: performing on the day with the stress and pressures that
Speaker 1: come with it. And Medical News Today showed that guided
Speaker 1: imagery GI is another type of meditation which we called visualization.
Speaker 1: The study said that guided imagery involves mentally visualizing peaceful
Speaker 1: scenes to promote a state of relaxation. One fifteen study
Speaker 1: investigated the combined effects of GI and music on work
Speaker 1: related anxiety. For this study, the researchers divided twenty participants
Speaker 1: into two groups. One group underwent a nine week GIM program,
Speaker 1: the other group received no treatment. Compared with the no
Speaker 1: treatment group, the GIM group showed significant improvements in stress
Speaker 1: management and well being. The results also showed a great
Speaker 1: reduction in blood quarters ole levels for the GIM group.
Speaker 1: So that's where you see the guided imagery mixing with
Speaker 1: the music, so that now you're sparking that. So what's
Speaker 1: really interesting for me is if you came to my tour,
Speaker 1: you know that we crowdsourced your favorite love songs and
Speaker 1: we played them before the show, in the middle of
Speaker 1: the show, at the end of the show, And those
Speaker 1: songs have got so ingrained in my mind because I
Speaker 1: would visualized the start of the show and those songs.
Speaker 1: Then now when I hear them, I'm back in that
Speaker 1: place about to go on stage. I walked into a
Speaker 1: plane the other day and they were playing the song
Speaker 1: that I used to go on before. It was Whitney,
Speaker 1: and literally every time I hear that song now I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm going back on stage. My memory locks in.
Speaker 1: And so what you want to do is create that
Speaker 1: sound and that guided imagery around those moments in your
Speaker 1: life that you're most stressed, whether it's giving that presentation
Speaker 1: at work, whether it's that uncomfortable conversation. My next step
Speaker 1: is a common one that I think you're probably aware of,
Speaker 1: but I want you to be even more aware of.
Speaker 1: It is know what triggers you, Know the things that
Speaker 1: you keep inviting into your life. Become aware of the
Speaker 1: things that you openly invite into your life that cause
Speaker 1: you anxiety. Could be a conversation with a particular person,
Speaker 1: could be a particular person at work that keeps reoccurring,
Speaker 1: could be someone in your personal life. Right, what is
Speaker 1: that trigger that you keep opening the door for that
Speaker 1: it's time to close the door for. And if you're
Speaker 1: scared of closing the door and looking bad and being mean,
Speaker 1: go back and listen to the people Pleasing episode that
Speaker 1: I did a couple of weeks ago, because that will
Speaker 1: help guide you through that. Because it's so important to
Speaker 1: be aware of what triggers you and limit those triggers. Right,
Speaker 1: I know when I feel anxious, and so I've created
Speaker 1: tools around anxiety. I have to go through regularly. I
Speaker 1: always have to go on stage that's not going to disappear,
Speaker 1: which means I need a routine before I go on
Speaker 1: to stage to deal with that. Otherwise I'll never go
Speaker 1: on stage. But get aware of the subtle things that
Speaker 1: trigger you as well well, because those are the ones
Speaker 1: that will trip you up if you don't figure it out.
Speaker 1: One of my next favorite strategies is to get it
Speaker 1: out of your head and onto your page. Write down
Speaker 1: what you're anxious about, Write down what you're worried about,
Speaker 1: write down, doodle, scribble whatever it means, rob words out,
Speaker 1: circle him, whatever it is. Research shows that much like
Speaker 1: other visually creative activities like coloring in or doing collage,
Speaker 1: is doodlingk can help you unwind. It's thought to calm
Speaker 1: the amygdala, the part of the brain that controls the
Speaker 1: fight or fight response, which is linked to stress and anxiety.
Speaker 1: So doodling while you're on the phone calls. Remember we
Speaker 1: used to do that. We're not on phone calls anymore,
Speaker 1: so we don't doodle. We text, So doodle away. Write
Speaker 1: down your thoughts. And one of my favorite techniques is
Speaker 1: an old one, but an amazing one. It's by Stephen Covey,
Speaker 1: who wrote the book Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.
Speaker 1: One of my favorite ones and one of the biggest
Speaker 1: ones he talks about, is knowing what you can and
Speaker 1: can't control. I often like putting my anxieties and worries
Speaker 1: in those buckets of what can I control and what
Speaker 1: can't I control, And when I start to scribble them down,
Speaker 1: I realized, Okay, well I can't control this, but I
Speaker 1: can control this. Let me put more energy towards it,
Speaker 1: Let me put more focus towards it. Let me give
Speaker 1: it more attention, because that will actually change my experience.
Speaker 1: And my seventh and last strategy is one that you're
Speaker 1: doing right now. Read and listen about the stuff you're
Speaker 1: scared about. When I'm struggling with something, my number one
Speaker 1: thing is to find the best book on it, ask
Speaker 1: my friends about it, find the next best podcast, and
Speaker 1: then share it with others. If you share these strategies
Speaker 1: with others, I guarantee you're more likely to practice them.
Speaker 1: And all I want you to do is choose the
Speaker 1: one that resonates with you and put it into practice,
Speaker 1: because that will make all the difference. Thank you for
Speaker 1: listening to On Purpose make sure you leave a review
Speaker 1: on Spotify and on Apple and on any platform you
Speaker 1: listen to make sure you go back and listen to
Speaker 1: any episodes that you've missed recently. I have been loving
Speaker 1: our guest episodees and our solos, and I hope this
Speaker 1: one served you. Thank you so much. Only a few
Speaker 1: cars in the world go from zero to sixty in
Speaker 1: under two seconds. Most vehicles just aren't built to accelerate
Speaker 1: that fast, and we humans aren't built for it, either
Speaker 1: mentally or physically. And yet that's how many of us
Speaker 1: start our days. One moment we're sound asleep, and the
Speaker 1: next we're wide awake, rapidly processing tons of information. And
Speaker 1: it all has to do with these little devices we
Speaker 1: keep a little too close at hand. The next seven
Speaker 1: minutes are about your morning routine and what your brain
Speaker 1: needs to succeed. I'm Jay Shehaddy. Welcome to the Daily Jay. First,
Speaker 1: let's get centered with three deep breaths, filling up your
Speaker 1: lungs and easing back out, inviting oxygen into your body
Speaker 1: and calming your nervous system, gathering up your attention and
Speaker 1: bringing it to this moment. Now, I'd like you to
Speaker 1: imagine it's the first thing in the morning, you're still
Speaker 1: in bed, you just woke up. You reach over and
Speaker 1: hit a button on your nightstand. Suddenly one hundred people
Speaker 1: barge into your bedroom begging for your attention. One of
Speaker 1: them is explaining world events to you. One is asking
Speaker 1: if you're going to meet that important deadline at work.
Speaker 1: Yet another is shouting about how amazing you'd look in
Speaker 1: some new genes. It's exhausting, overwhelming, and unpleasant. Your heart
Speaker 1: rate spikes, your stress response is activated. Your hope for
Speaker 1: focus today is dwindling, to say the least. You'd never
Speaker 1: hit that button, would you, Except that's exactly what you're
Speaker 1: doing when you begin your morning by opening up your phone,
Speaker 1: and it causes a measurable negative impact on your brain.
Speaker 1: So you can actually think of your mind like the
Speaker 1: engine of a car. When you're asleep, your engine is on,
Speaker 1: but not in gear. The brain is completely relaxed. As
Speaker 1: you wake up, your brain shifts into first gear, slow
Speaker 1: but starting up. It gradually shifts up, getting faster, more alert,
Speaker 1: and as your mind enters the highway that is your day,
Speaker 1: it kicks into high gear. Awake, aware and focused, humming
Speaker 1: along smoothly. But if you pick up your phone. Immediately
Speaker 1: you hijack that process, your brain jumps directly into high gear.
Speaker 1: The same way that's bad for the performance of your car,
Speaker 1: it's bad for your performance as well. And this isn't
Speaker 1: just theory, this is science. Your brain actually moves through
Speaker 1: different physical states as it wakes up. The earlier states
Speaker 1: are associated with creativity and mindfulness. When you skip over them,
Speaker 1: it's been shown to limit your attention and prime your
Speaker 1: negative stress response for the whole day. Yuck, I get it.
Speaker 1: There are a number of reasons we start our day
Speaker 1: with a morning scroll. We're excited for some news, we're lonely.
Speaker 1: We do it out of habit. And I'm not saying
Speaker 1: you should stop checking your phone, but can't it wait
Speaker 1: a few minutes. I know sometimes we have duties that
Speaker 1: require us to be on call, and so keeping our
Speaker 1: phone away may not be possible. But if you can
Speaker 1: reclaim some time for your mind, it will do wonders
Speaker 1: for the rest of your day. Just like the fastest cause,
Speaker 1: your brain might be capable of going from zero to sixty,
Speaker 1: but it's way better to ramp up slowly. Now, let's
Speaker 1: downshift the gears in our mind as we close with
Speaker 1: a meditation. Begin by getting a little more comfortable wherever
Speaker 1: you are, gently slowing down your breath and giving your
Speaker 1: mind permission to chill out a bit. Today, as we breathe,
Speaker 1: we're going to consciously relax individual parts of the body,
Speaker 1: so you'll breathe in energy and then soften on the exhale,
Speaker 1: releasing tension. Let's start with your brow inhaling deeply and exhaling,
Speaker 1: letting any tightness go. Now your eyelids, relaxing them as
Speaker 1: you breathe out on this breath, seeing if you can
Speaker 1: loosen your jaw now, dropping your shoulders, moving your attention
Speaker 1: to your hands and allowing them to fully unclench and unwind.
Speaker 1: The next few moments are yours to release tension wherever
Speaker 1: you want. And now let's open it up. Reflect on
Speaker 1: your standard morning routine. What do you typically do as
Speaker 1: soon as you wake up? Are you going zero to
Speaker 1: sixty or are you slowly shifting gears? How could you
Speaker 1: change things to benefit your brain? I know it may
Speaker 1: take some time to alter your habits, but there's no
Speaker 1: pressure to overhaul things immediately. Just make sure you stay
Speaker 1: aware and stay on the right track. I'll see you
Speaker 1: again tomorrow. Thank you so much for joining