1 00:00:02,160 --> 00:00:03,120 Speaker 1: Hey there, everybody. 2 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:06,160 Speaker 2: Welcome to this edition of Amy and TJ, where I've 3 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:09,200 Speaker 2: already messed up the word everybody. But that's what happens 4 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:11,000 Speaker 2: when I start podcast. TJ, why do you let me 5 00:00:11,039 --> 00:00:11,799 Speaker 2: start podcasts? 6 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:14,280 Speaker 3: Because you were excited about this one, and you girls 7 00:00:14,320 --> 00:00:16,640 Speaker 3: were chopping it up. This is a first of its 8 00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:18,840 Speaker 3: kind episode for us, so I can see why you're 9 00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:19,400 Speaker 3: a little nervous. 10 00:00:19,440 --> 00:00:20,759 Speaker 1: I got nervous, a little intimidated. 11 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 3: Folks are about to talk to yes, because they have 12 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:26,319 Speaker 3: a podcast called Unlikely Affair, and I just want to 13 00:00:26,320 --> 00:00:27,520 Speaker 3: make sure nobody. 14 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,400 Speaker 1: Thinks that's the new name of our podcast. Let's not 15 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:32,840 Speaker 1: confuse anybody. 16 00:00:32,920 --> 00:00:37,559 Speaker 2: An Unlikely Affair, Laala Kent and Average Childers and they 17 00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:42,120 Speaker 2: just started this podcast a month ago, so with their podcasters, 18 00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:44,440 Speaker 2: or at least we know that Lala has her podcast. 19 00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:49,960 Speaker 2: And obviously everyone knows Amber and Lala, because yes, they're 20 00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:54,280 Speaker 2: on your television screens, they're in movie theaters, they are everywhere, 21 00:00:54,880 --> 00:00:59,800 Speaker 2: and now they're together, which is a huge part of 22 00:00:59,840 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 2: the story. I don't know where to begin. Maybe we 23 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:09,479 Speaker 2: begin with Amber. Amber, you're married, you got two kids. 24 00:01:10,240 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 1: Tell me what happened? 25 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:14,240 Speaker 2: What year was this was it twenty seventeen is when 26 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:15,720 Speaker 2: it all started to unravel. 27 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:19,880 Speaker 4: Well for everybody else, it started unraveling the day I 28 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:23,240 Speaker 4: said I do, I went to say I don't, but 29 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:24,280 Speaker 4: I am. 30 00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 5: Something just came out. 31 00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:28,560 Speaker 3: In all seriousness. Really, do you really think you may? 32 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:30,319 Speaker 3: You could go back to your wedding day and think 33 00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:33,040 Speaker 3: this was a mistake all that day. You felt that, 34 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:34,120 Speaker 3: not later. 35 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 5: But yeah, and I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. 36 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:40,839 Speaker 4: When you when you get married, you think, as a woman, 37 00:01:41,080 --> 00:01:42,399 Speaker 4: you think, oh my god, this is going to be 38 00:01:42,400 --> 00:01:44,560 Speaker 4: so romantic. And we eloped and I agreed to Elope, 39 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:46,440 Speaker 4: and that was all. I didn't want to be a 40 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:48,600 Speaker 4: princess walking down the aisle. That was like not my thing. 41 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:52,880 Speaker 5: But when you go home at night and. 42 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:54,880 Speaker 4: You're like, all right, let's we're gonna have like sex 43 00:01:54,920 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 4: for the first time as a married couple, and like 44 00:01:57,440 --> 00:01:59,240 Speaker 4: it's going to be sexy, and oh, it's going to 45 00:01:59,280 --> 00:02:01,760 Speaker 4: feel so different and passionate because now we're like one 46 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:04,559 Speaker 4: and we're married. And you look over at your partner 47 00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:08,639 Speaker 4: and you say hey, and he's like, I'm too tired. 48 00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:12,560 Speaker 4: Not tonight. You're like, I think I just made the 49 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:13,839 Speaker 4: biggest mistake of my life. 50 00:02:13,919 --> 00:02:19,400 Speaker 5: That's called coke. Actually, thank you, We're welcome coke. 51 00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:24,960 Speaker 1: Oh got fine? 52 00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:25,440 Speaker 2: All right. 53 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:27,640 Speaker 1: So on your wedding night, you were like, what have 54 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:32,360 Speaker 1: I done? Get that? So how how do you think? 55 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,720 Speaker 1: Because you were married for technically what seven years or so? 56 00:02:35,919 --> 00:02:38,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, almost eight, I think by the time. I think 57 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 4: almost eight by the time everything was finalized. 58 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:42,080 Speaker 5: Yeah. 59 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:44,680 Speaker 4: You you know what, I think a lot of my 60 00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:47,560 Speaker 4: mentality back then. And it's so I feel like I'm 61 00:02:47,560 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 4: talking about a separate person, right, because the person that 62 00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:52,959 Speaker 4: you are today is you look back and you're like, wow, 63 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,720 Speaker 4: I just want to like go hug her or slap her, right. 64 00:02:56,520 --> 00:03:00,200 Speaker 4: I I grew up in a Mormon family, so for me, 65 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:03,120 Speaker 4: I had all these values of what a marriage should 66 00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 4: look like. And obviously my ex was not Mormon, but 67 00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:10,480 Speaker 4: I still valued marriage. My parents, you know, met when 68 00:03:10,520 --> 00:03:12,280 Speaker 4: they were in high school and still to this day 69 00:03:12,320 --> 00:03:15,000 Speaker 4: that they're married. So divorce wasn't even in my vocabulary. 70 00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:16,840 Speaker 5: And I'm a fighter. 71 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:20,040 Speaker 4: I wanted to keep fighting for my marriage from the 72 00:03:20,080 --> 00:03:22,840 Speaker 4: first time, you know, things started to go wrong and 73 00:03:22,919 --> 00:03:24,000 Speaker 4: I was just. 74 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 5: I believe in love. 75 00:03:25,639 --> 00:03:28,080 Speaker 4: I was sold the fairy tale that you know, Walt 76 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:30,959 Speaker 4: Disney sold every little girl sitting on their couch going 77 00:03:30,960 --> 00:03:33,640 Speaker 4: that Prince Charming is going to come rescue me, and 78 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:35,920 Speaker 4: you're like, wait no, maybe he'll come the next chapter 79 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:38,640 Speaker 4: of my life, or maybe maybe this baby will help it, 80 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:41,280 Speaker 4: or maybe this trip will help it, or maybe you 81 00:03:41,320 --> 00:03:44,160 Speaker 4: know what. You just make all these excuses up, and 82 00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 4: eventually you end up becoming the sick person. Because that's 83 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:53,000 Speaker 4: essentially what happened. I was became a broken human being 84 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:56,560 Speaker 4: where I couldn't look at myself in the mirror. I 85 00:03:56,600 --> 00:03:59,440 Speaker 4: didn't know who I was anymore. I completely lost my identity. 86 00:03:59,560 --> 00:04:02,680 Speaker 4: My family was not happy. I truly couldn't come to 87 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:05,120 Speaker 4: them and tell them about everything that was going on 88 00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 4: in my marriage because my dad would have shown up 89 00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:14,120 Speaker 4: with a shotgun in two second. Listen, I wanted you 90 00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,760 Speaker 4: to feel some pain too. You had to go through 91 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:16,240 Speaker 4: it as well. 92 00:04:16,839 --> 00:04:20,599 Speaker 3: All right, that's that's We should have put a disclaimer 93 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:22,800 Speaker 3: at the beginning that this is a crossover and therefore 94 00:04:22,920 --> 00:04:24,480 Speaker 3: some language here you're going to hear that you're not 95 00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:25,200 Speaker 3: used to hearing them. 96 00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 1: We dropped some curse words every now and then. Trust me, 97 00:04:34,920 --> 00:04:39,320 Speaker 1: one kind of has a ring to it. 98 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:41,920 Speaker 5: I feel like there's a song. 99 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:48,240 Speaker 4: So so essentially, yeah, I I you know, I just stayed. 100 00:04:48,279 --> 00:04:50,000 Speaker 4: I stayed because you know, I tell people this all 101 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:52,080 Speaker 4: the time. I stayed because of my kids. I really did. 102 00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:52,800 Speaker 5: I didn't know. 103 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:55,159 Speaker 4: I didn't want them to come from a broken family. 104 00:04:55,680 --> 00:05:01,760 Speaker 4: And ultimately I stayed shooting any you know, years and 105 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:07,120 Speaker 4: eventually the tape that I witnessed and saw was it 106 00:05:07,160 --> 00:05:07,440 Speaker 4: for me. 107 00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:09,440 Speaker 5: And I decided one day. 108 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:12,279 Speaker 4: I was like, if I needed to leave for my kids, 109 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:14,040 Speaker 4: I wanted to show them a good example. And I 110 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,640 Speaker 4: said this to my kids, sometimes two homes are better 111 00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:19,360 Speaker 4: than one. And really that was a hard thing for 112 00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:22,120 Speaker 4: me to accept. And I'll never forget sitting down with 113 00:05:22,160 --> 00:05:23,680 Speaker 4: the kids and telling them that we were going to 114 00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 4: get divorced. It was awful, awful, you know. My Riley, 115 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:31,400 Speaker 4: my youngest one, was so little. London understood and she 116 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:39,000 Speaker 4: was very emotional about it. Who It's hard, but ultimately 117 00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:41,360 Speaker 4: it was the best decision. You know. It's like those 118 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:44,440 Speaker 4: really painful moments that you because then it wasn't about 119 00:05:44,440 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 4: me or him or Laala at that point, it was 120 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:49,279 Speaker 4: about the kids, right, yeah, thank you. 121 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:53,679 Speaker 3: How so we get to listening to what you're saying. 122 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:57,279 Speaker 3: Folks didn't see that moment. But Laala is the one 123 00:05:57,279 --> 00:06:00,480 Speaker 3: that just put her hand on your back to comforts 124 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:03,520 Speaker 3: you as you're in tears. Now, can you all explain 125 00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:09,800 Speaker 3: how unlikely and incredible the idea is that this woman 126 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,880 Speaker 3: is comforting you right now, given we haven't gotten into 127 00:06:14,080 --> 00:06:16,080 Speaker 3: a lot of you mentioned the tape you saw and whatnot, 128 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:19,120 Speaker 3: but just how incredible it is the fact that you 129 00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:21,080 Speaker 3: all are sitting here supporting each other. And this is 130 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:22,839 Speaker 3: where we get into some of the story that some 131 00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:24,039 Speaker 3: people know and some people don't know. 132 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:28,279 Speaker 5: Yeah, well, I feel like her story was shared. 133 00:06:28,880 --> 00:06:31,720 Speaker 6: You know, we talked about this when you guys were 134 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:35,039 Speaker 6: on our podcast about you know, people taking control of 135 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:35,600 Speaker 6: your narrative. 136 00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,240 Speaker 5: Amber's story was very much. 137 00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:43,680 Speaker 6: Hijacked by a reality TV show called vander Pump Rules. 138 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:50,360 Speaker 6: And as much as our story has so many nuances, 139 00:06:50,640 --> 00:06:52,040 Speaker 6: you know, you at some point. 140 00:06:51,839 --> 00:06:53,560 Speaker 5: Have to just call it what it is. She was 141 00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 5: his wife. I was his mistress. 142 00:06:56,560 --> 00:07:01,760 Speaker 6: I was twenty five at the time time of getting 143 00:07:01,800 --> 00:07:04,240 Speaker 6: into a relationship with him, and he had portrayed that 144 00:07:04,320 --> 00:07:08,000 Speaker 6: he was going through a separation that was going to 145 00:07:08,120 --> 00:07:12,600 Speaker 6: end in divorce. And I feel like every time my 146 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:16,200 Speaker 6: gut spoke to me, I silenced it with alcohol. 147 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:19,840 Speaker 5: And I've talked about this before. 148 00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 6: I don't want to say that my alcoholism came from him, 149 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:27,280 Speaker 6: because I think it was alive and well within me 150 00:07:27,480 --> 00:07:30,880 Speaker 6: for many years. I just think it became when I 151 00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:33,240 Speaker 6: pinpoint when it got out of control. It was when 152 00:07:33,240 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 6: he came into my life. And I'm now over seven 153 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 6: years sober. Congratulations, Thank you so much. And when I 154 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:46,440 Speaker 6: when I hear her talk about these times, and you know, 155 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:49,160 Speaker 6: her talking to her kids, you know, there's so much 156 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,680 Speaker 6: shame that comes, and I've tried. 157 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:55,559 Speaker 5: To work through it. I'm crying again. I'm sweet. 158 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 2: Sorry, But you know what, I think it's so beautiful Laala, 159 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:02,360 Speaker 2: that you're able to to own it and say I 160 00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:06,000 Speaker 2: was twenty five, I made a mistake. I feel deep 161 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:10,280 Speaker 2: regret and shame for how Amber feels right now, but 162 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,520 Speaker 2: I think it's a beautiful thing that you're able. Look 163 00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:13,080 Speaker 2: at the two of. 164 00:08:13,040 --> 00:08:15,960 Speaker 1: You right now, it's pretty incredible, unbelievable story. 165 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 5: It is an unbelievable story. 166 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:20,560 Speaker 6: I think that you hear a lot of people, you know, 167 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:23,680 Speaker 6: going through divorces, and then each person finds their person 168 00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 6: and then they end up all liking each other. It's 169 00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:29,920 Speaker 6: very weird that the wife finds her husband and a 170 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:33,480 Speaker 6: sex tape with me on it, and we're the ones 171 00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:36,840 Speaker 6: that end up together non romantically, but we're the ones 172 00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:40,000 Speaker 6: still standing and he's, you know, wherever he is. 173 00:08:41,040 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 5: And people ask me like, how could you not know 174 00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:46,440 Speaker 5: that he was married? 175 00:08:47,720 --> 00:08:49,880 Speaker 6: And I can't answer that because I think had I 176 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:52,080 Speaker 6: not been drinking, I would have I would have known. 177 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:56,760 Speaker 5: I didn't know. I just chose to silence my gut. 178 00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:59,679 Speaker 6: And forget about all of the red flags that were 179 00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:03,080 Speaker 6: right in front of me. And actually, after I got sober, 180 00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:06,679 Speaker 6: and this was lightly covered on vander Pump Rules. After 181 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:10,240 Speaker 6: I got sober, I remember saying to him, you know, 182 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,920 Speaker 6: I have this scarlet letter that I'm wearing and I 183 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:17,720 Speaker 6: needed to go away. You know, I'm labeled a home 184 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:20,240 Speaker 6: wrecking whrror and I need to know for a fact 185 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:23,480 Speaker 6: that you were not married and that I did not 186 00:09:23,679 --> 00:09:24,360 Speaker 6: wreck this home. 187 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:25,680 Speaker 5: That is weighing heavy on me. 188 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,320 Speaker 6: And he said, I have worked with a therapist and 189 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:31,640 Speaker 6: we are going to fly to Arizona and she is 190 00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:33,440 Speaker 6: going to tell you, because she's been with me from 191 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:37,000 Speaker 6: the beginning, that you did not wreck my home. We 192 00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:39,880 Speaker 6: fly out to Arizona, we work with this woman. She 193 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:43,880 Speaker 6: tells me the marriage was over, you did not wreck anything. 194 00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:47,280 Speaker 6: I left feeling so great that that was the validation 195 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:47,840 Speaker 6: I needed. 196 00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:49,199 Speaker 5: Cut to. 197 00:09:51,000 --> 00:09:55,120 Speaker 6: October fifteenth of twenty twenty one. My daughter is seven 198 00:09:55,160 --> 00:09:58,640 Speaker 6: months old. The picture surface of my ex and this woman. 199 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:01,480 Speaker 6: My gut speaks to me. I'm sober now, I go 200 00:10:01,640 --> 00:10:05,520 Speaker 6: somethingate right. I end up leaving him. I get Amber 201 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,120 Speaker 6: on the phone to make amends. We start, you know, 202 00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:10,839 Speaker 6: slowly but surely, having communication. 203 00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:12,600 Speaker 5: I asked her about this therapist. 204 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:17,400 Speaker 6: She goes, that was our couple's therapist when Randall and 205 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:20,640 Speaker 6: I were working on our marriage. I called this therapist 206 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:24,600 Speaker 6: you guys, and I tell her, you know, this is 207 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:26,200 Speaker 6: what I've been told. And she goes, well, I can't 208 00:10:26,240 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 6: discuss Amber because she was, you know, my patient. 209 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:30,439 Speaker 5: I said, well, you. 210 00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:33,000 Speaker 6: Certainly had no problem discussing her when I came to 211 00:10:33,080 --> 00:10:36,719 Speaker 6: visit you with my ex. Her response to me, I 212 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:39,200 Speaker 6: just don't understand how this is a problem for you, Lola. 213 00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:42,240 Speaker 6: We had many great sessions. I said, this is not 214 00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:45,240 Speaker 6: a problem for me. This is a huge problem for you. 215 00:10:46,320 --> 00:10:47,480 Speaker 6: I was like, I got a lot on my plate, 216 00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 6: but I'm going to come back to you. I will 217 00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:50,560 Speaker 6: come back for you girl. 218 00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:51,560 Speaker 2: This is it. 219 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:52,680 Speaker 3: She still working as a therapist. 220 00:10:52,960 --> 00:10:56,000 Speaker 5: I have no idea. My plate got really full. I 221 00:10:56,040 --> 00:10:57,199 Speaker 5: was like, I can't worry about this. 222 00:10:57,160 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 3: Therapist conversations that you decided to reach out, is that 223 00:11:04,200 --> 00:11:06,280 Speaker 3: the first time you all had interacted. You said you 224 00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:09,320 Speaker 3: decided to reach out slowly and you started talking. But 225 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,480 Speaker 3: was that the first time you all started interacting. 226 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:15,840 Speaker 4: We had an interaction a few separate times, you know, 227 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,760 Speaker 4: we attempted I think one or two birthday parties. 228 00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:20,160 Speaker 1: It was just really. 229 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:22,640 Speaker 4: Uncomfortable and really at the end of the day is 230 00:11:23,120 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 4: he didn't want us close and I at some point 231 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,600 Speaker 4: I was like, you know what, let's just make this 232 00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 4: work right. And it was. It was a constant intervening 233 00:11:33,520 --> 00:11:36,760 Speaker 4: by his part, in addition to at some at some 234 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:40,480 Speaker 4: points we were especially during the pandemic, and we were all, 235 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:44,760 Speaker 4: you know, trying to just survive. Her and I had 236 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:48,600 Speaker 4: our few disputes. But I even said to you yesterday, 237 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,640 Speaker 4: I always wanted to be, you know, close with you. 238 00:11:50,679 --> 00:11:52,720 Speaker 4: I didn't I wouldn't need to be best friends, but 239 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:54,960 Speaker 4: you know, for the sake of the children and now ocean, 240 00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,199 Speaker 4: and it's like, let's make this work for everybody and 241 00:11:57,960 --> 00:12:00,880 Speaker 4: put our anger and bitterness aside. 242 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:06,640 Speaker 6: That was not easy though. I was very intimidated by her. 243 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:09,679 Speaker 6: You know, she was an actress. I was on reality 244 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:14,600 Speaker 6: TV acting a damn fool. She had talent, she was 245 00:12:14,640 --> 00:12:17,560 Speaker 6: on Red Car, but she was like everything I was 246 00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:22,080 Speaker 6: not on top of the person i'm with has two 247 00:12:22,160 --> 00:12:24,800 Speaker 6: children with her, and we're all parents now we know 248 00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:28,959 Speaker 6: that that love is like and I like blamed her 249 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:29,200 Speaker 6: for that. 250 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:32,320 Speaker 5: I'm like, you gave him what I have not given him. 251 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:34,040 Speaker 6: Now that I'm in the I'm like, if someone were 252 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,480 Speaker 6: to come like, I hate them, right, you. 253 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:39,160 Speaker 5: Don't got to worry about him. She is my everything. 254 00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:42,880 Speaker 6: He's you know, background noise. But I looked at her 255 00:12:42,920 --> 00:12:46,160 Speaker 6: and felt very intimidated, and I think I was jealous. 256 00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:49,040 Speaker 6: And then you add the alcohol and it just fueled 257 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,160 Speaker 6: a part of me that was it would just. 258 00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:53,000 Speaker 5: Breed toxicity. 259 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:57,200 Speaker 6: Every moment that you know, her name was mentioned and 260 00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,120 Speaker 6: I chose to drink to numb things. I was a 261 00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:03,680 Speaker 6: person that I was not proud of. And even though 262 00:13:04,520 --> 00:13:06,959 Speaker 6: we had moments when I was with him where we 263 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 6: could have you know, productive conversations, it always ended in flames. 264 00:13:13,440 --> 00:13:15,480 Speaker 5: Whether it was his fault or not, it didn't matter. 265 00:13:15,960 --> 00:13:18,000 Speaker 6: The day that I left him and I had to 266 00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:20,840 Speaker 6: really sit with myself and go it was I would 267 00:13:20,840 --> 00:13:21,520 Speaker 6: be myself up. 268 00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:22,520 Speaker 5: I'm like, you deserved this. 269 00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:28,040 Speaker 6: You stepped in, You ruined someone's home, and now you 270 00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:28,880 Speaker 6: know what she. 271 00:13:29,679 --> 00:13:31,520 Speaker 1: Was feeling because he stepped out on you. 272 00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:32,520 Speaker 5: Correct. 273 00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 6: But it also made sense when she told me you 274 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:37,280 Speaker 6: saved me because I looked at this girl who I'm like, 275 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:39,640 Speaker 6: I'm angry at you, but also you saved me because 276 00:13:39,640 --> 00:13:41,040 Speaker 6: I did not like this person. 277 00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:44,320 Speaker 5: I didn't want to be with him. Isn't it wild? 278 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:45,920 Speaker 5: Because then you go, why do you have a baby 279 00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:48,640 Speaker 5: with him? And I'm like, I don't really know. I'm 280 00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:50,280 Speaker 5: really glad she's here, though. 281 00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:53,079 Speaker 3: Well, this idea that this that this pattern is underway, 282 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 3: that you were married to him, he's dealing with you. 283 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:58,400 Speaker 1: You saved her. 284 00:13:58,360 --> 00:14:01,080 Speaker 3: From him, This other woman saved you from him, and 285 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,800 Speaker 3: maybe some other woman is going to come along and 286 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:06,560 Speaker 3: save this new That's weird that you all have put 287 00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:11,600 Speaker 3: it into well context, that is insane. What beefs did 288 00:14:11,640 --> 00:14:14,400 Speaker 3: you all actually have? You talk about jealous but as 289 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:17,040 Speaker 3: far as conflict, did you did you blame her for 290 00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:19,200 Speaker 3: what was happening in your marriage for sure. 291 00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:21,440 Speaker 4: Well I really blame both of them, but of course 292 00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:25,600 Speaker 4: I wanted to because there was this love that I 293 00:14:25,680 --> 00:14:29,200 Speaker 4: had with my ex right there was. I didn't ever 294 00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 4: love her. I loved my ex and I wanted my 295 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:36,760 Speaker 4: family to stay together. So for the longest time, I 296 00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:39,000 Speaker 4: I would find any reason to be mad at her, 297 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:42,200 Speaker 4: you know, and especially when another woman is stepping in. 298 00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:45,880 Speaker 4: Not only did she, you know, take over my family 299 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:49,560 Speaker 4: and my marriage, but now she's stepping in and taking 300 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:51,840 Speaker 4: care of my children. So it's like, okay, you could 301 00:14:51,840 --> 00:14:54,680 Speaker 4: take care of him, but now you're coming in and 302 00:14:54,720 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 4: Mama Bear's going to come out and now. 303 00:14:56,920 --> 00:14:58,560 Speaker 5: So that was really hard. 304 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:03,280 Speaker 4: But after I let my guard down and just really 305 00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:06,760 Speaker 4: put my anger aside, and I have said this before 306 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:13,280 Speaker 4: on our podcast, she really helped me. My family life 307 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:16,880 Speaker 4: at his house was so calm. She made sure the 308 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:18,640 Speaker 4: kids went to bed on time, made sure that they 309 00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,560 Speaker 4: had good vegetables, made sure, you know, it was like 310 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:25,040 Speaker 4: she was the mother hen And I was so grateful 311 00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:28,120 Speaker 4: because now I see the dysfunction not having. 312 00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:30,960 Speaker 5: A woman in the house, and I'm like, would you 313 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,480 Speaker 5: go back? Would I need you over there? 314 00:15:34,760 --> 00:15:37,520 Speaker 3: But I am I know. 315 00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:40,040 Speaker 2: I am in awe of both of you, by the way, 316 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:42,840 Speaker 2: because we too often hear these stories, and I get 317 00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:45,280 Speaker 2: it it might be human nature, but cat fights and 318 00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:48,560 Speaker 2: girls blaming the other woman and not blaming their husband 319 00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,120 Speaker 2: or not blaming who they were actually in a relationship, 320 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:54,120 Speaker 2: but always going after the other woman, right, and a 321 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:55,080 Speaker 2: younger woman too. 322 00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,680 Speaker 1: So it's like your classic moment where you're like, how 323 00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:01,200 Speaker 1: dare you right? How did you get from? 324 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,560 Speaker 2: And I know you said you reached out after you 325 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:06,760 Speaker 2: left him, but how did you go from maybe tolerating 326 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:09,720 Speaker 2: and maybe slightly appreciating maybe what she gave your kids 327 00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:13,760 Speaker 2: while you weren't there, to becoming a unit, a team 328 00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:17,960 Speaker 2: and having a deep friendship That seems impossible to me. 329 00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 6: It is very strange, I'm gonna tell you, and I'm 330 00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:24,680 Speaker 6: sure sorry to your listeners who don't hear language like this. 331 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:28,080 Speaker 5: But was it last night or this morning? When oh, 332 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:29,040 Speaker 5: this morning. 333 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:31,240 Speaker 6: I was in the shower and we're talking. She's in 334 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:34,720 Speaker 6: the bathroom and I'm finished. I opened the curtain and 335 00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:37,680 Speaker 6: she's on the toilet going number one. 336 00:16:37,840 --> 00:16:40,880 Speaker 5: But I go, we're really comfortable with each other, aren't we? 337 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:42,960 Speaker 5: How did this happen? 338 00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:47,640 Speaker 6: Like it really is so strange because it's gone so 339 00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,720 Speaker 6: far beyond like the person we had in common. Right, 340 00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:52,880 Speaker 6: you can have someone in common, it doesn't mean you're 341 00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:56,480 Speaker 6: gonna connect. We had two separate rooms out here, you guys. 342 00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:57,680 Speaker 6: We went to the front desk. We were like, we're 343 00:16:57,720 --> 00:17:00,960 Speaker 6: gonna need us one room a suite because we would 344 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:01,920 Speaker 6: like to be with each other. 345 00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:02,560 Speaker 3: That's crazy. 346 00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:04,600 Speaker 5: That is crazy to me. 347 00:17:05,640 --> 00:17:09,440 Speaker 6: And I think he obviously had a type, which I'm 348 00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:10,960 Speaker 6: thrilled about because I really love you. 349 00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:11,920 Speaker 5: You're very pretty. 350 00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:16,280 Speaker 4: Sorry, that's amazing. I've seen that naked body. I know 351 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:17,800 Speaker 4: why he's slept with you. 352 00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:18,600 Speaker 5: I would have too. 353 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,520 Speaker 6: I don't know I'm going to turn reve but I 354 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,879 Speaker 6: think personality wise too, because we can both go to 355 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:26,439 Speaker 6: the mats. 356 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:29,320 Speaker 5: We're both very open about talking. I mean I'm a 357 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 5: little bit more vulgar than she is, obviously. 358 00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:36,440 Speaker 6: But like just our conversations, I leave with my cup 359 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,080 Speaker 6: filling so full after being around her. 360 00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:44,040 Speaker 1: And you guys share daughters. Your daughters are sisters, Yes, yeah, yes, 361 00:17:44,880 --> 00:17:46,800 Speaker 1: that what a gift to them that you want. 362 00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:49,840 Speaker 2: Because I'm this could make me emotional thinking about how 363 00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,560 Speaker 2: often like my daughter who's nineteen just called me and 364 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,520 Speaker 2: talking about girls tearing other girls down and she's upset 365 00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:58,879 Speaker 2: because someone said something about something and oftentimes. 366 00:17:58,320 --> 00:17:59,440 Speaker 1: There's a boy involved. 367 00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:04,760 Speaker 2: Right, So what an example for your daughters to see 368 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:06,920 Speaker 2: this bond and this friendship. 369 00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:08,960 Speaker 1: I think it's so beautiful. 370 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:11,560 Speaker 2: I'm blown away because both of you all had to 371 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,520 Speaker 2: shed your egos and shed blameing. It's so easy to 372 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 2: blame the other woman, right, yeah, to say no, what 373 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,320 Speaker 2: did I do wrong? Or how can I be like 374 00:18:22,359 --> 00:18:27,240 Speaker 2: you were even talking about basically saying I need to 375 00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:31,320 Speaker 2: understand this other woman and not just point the finger 376 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:33,600 Speaker 2: at her and see and be with her and have 377 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:36,600 Speaker 2: us be a united film just for my kid's sake initially, 378 00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:39,199 Speaker 2: but then to allow her into your you have to 379 00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 2: open up your heart and be very vulnerable to do 380 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:42,160 Speaker 2: what you all are doing. 381 00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,760 Speaker 4: It took a while to get there, but I think 382 00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:48,679 Speaker 4: for me a big part of it was, you know, 383 00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 4: getting sober as well. That really changed my life and 384 00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:55,720 Speaker 4: working a program and it's not you know, I learned 385 00:18:55,720 --> 00:18:58,200 Speaker 4: about forgiveness when I went to church every Sunday, right 386 00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:01,280 Speaker 4: or I went to seminary, which is church before school. 387 00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:03,720 Speaker 4: It was a different I really had to have a 388 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:07,480 Speaker 4: relationship with gain a relationship with a higher power to 389 00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:08,399 Speaker 4: really understand that. 390 00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:13,000 Speaker 5: Lawless human right. My ex is my ex. 391 00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:15,800 Speaker 4: You can't change people he is, And I tell my kids, 392 00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,800 Speaker 4: you know, every day we have to love him for 393 00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:21,280 Speaker 4: who he is where he is. Right Does that mean 394 00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:25,280 Speaker 4: some days I want to freaking strangle him sometimes? But 395 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:28,360 Speaker 4: he is who he is, and we're all human at 396 00:19:28,359 --> 00:19:30,680 Speaker 4: the end of the day. And there's, like I said before, 397 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:32,879 Speaker 4: there's so much stuff going on in the world that 398 00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:35,800 Speaker 4: if I could just be a little bit of an 399 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:39,600 Speaker 4: example or to someone on social media or that is 400 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:42,240 Speaker 4: listening to this podcast to know that you can find 401 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,119 Speaker 4: happiness and love does always win. I didn't want to 402 00:19:45,160 --> 00:19:47,840 Speaker 4: It's like I didn't want to die, and hating her 403 00:19:48,040 --> 00:19:50,199 Speaker 4: was killing me. It wasn't doing anything to her. She 404 00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:51,640 Speaker 4: was going to go live her life no matter what. 405 00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:54,520 Speaker 4: So I had to make a choice of Okay, you 406 00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:57,840 Speaker 4: really need to stop and look at the bigger picture. 407 00:19:57,880 --> 00:19:58,040 Speaker 2: Here. 408 00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:10,640 Speaker 3: Can you give, for just a moment to every young 409 00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,639 Speaker 3: woman woman out there listening who ends up in a 410 00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:16,160 Speaker 3: position where they are targeting or think it's the other 411 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,479 Speaker 3: woman's fault and they're not I guess putting a lot 412 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:20,760 Speaker 3: of responsibility. Maybe on the guy they're in a relationship with. 413 00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:23,679 Speaker 3: How is it you all were able to do something 414 00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:26,960 Speaker 3: and not direct all that anger or continue to direct 415 00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:30,160 Speaker 3: it towards the other woman like we As you mentioned 416 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 3: it just women always pit it against each other no 417 00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:34,560 Speaker 3: matter what it is. It seems like, how did give 418 00:20:34,640 --> 00:20:36,920 Speaker 3: some advice really to women listening? How do you get 419 00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:38,560 Speaker 3: past that? Stop doing that? 420 00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:41,520 Speaker 6: Well? I think women are looked at as like provocateurs, right, 421 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:43,760 Speaker 6: Like we walk in and we're like it's. 422 00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:46,280 Speaker 5: Like we lure them in, and it's like, well, hold on, 423 00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:51,600 Speaker 5: let's calm down a little bit, and it is. It's 424 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:54,160 Speaker 5: very tough to not. 425 00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:58,600 Speaker 6: Go up against the woman and hold the man accountable. 426 00:20:59,640 --> 00:21:04,119 Speaker 6: I think time and I think taking a step back. 427 00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:05,160 Speaker 5: I mean, I'm. 428 00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:06,719 Speaker 4: She. 429 00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:11,200 Speaker 6: I think where she and I were different was he 430 00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:13,160 Speaker 6: had stepped out many times on her, and I'm sure 431 00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:16,040 Speaker 6: he did on me too. But you really, I think 432 00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,240 Speaker 6: you loved him at some point and you really fought 433 00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:18,560 Speaker 6: for it. 434 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:22,480 Speaker 5: I don't think I ever loved him like that. I 435 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:24,639 Speaker 5: didn't really care. It's like, go sleep with. 436 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:26,119 Speaker 6: Whoever you want, as long as I don't have to 437 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,320 Speaker 6: be doing it anymore, Like, go do what you need 438 00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:35,480 Speaker 6: to do. And so sadly it was the common bond 439 00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:39,919 Speaker 6: of like being done dirty by this person. So I 440 00:21:40,040 --> 00:21:43,280 Speaker 6: think if you can take a step back and point 441 00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:44,920 Speaker 6: out what am I mad about? 442 00:21:44,960 --> 00:21:45,120 Speaker 4: Here? 443 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,880 Speaker 5: Am I mad about this woman coming in? Yes? Am 444 00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:50,000 Speaker 5: I mad that he stepped out on me? You really 445 00:21:50,040 --> 00:21:50,360 Speaker 5: have to. 446 00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:54,040 Speaker 6: Pinpoint what it is that has made you feel the 447 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:58,280 Speaker 6: way you're feeling. And also, and this is the hardest part, 448 00:21:58,480 --> 00:21:59,720 Speaker 6: and I think this is sobriety. 449 00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,520 Speaker 5: What part did I play in this? 450 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 6: Because my part exists somewhere within this. 451 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:08,720 Speaker 5: What did I not give? 452 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:14,160 Speaker 6: And it's not taking blame, but when I did remove 453 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,960 Speaker 6: myself and go, you know this happened because of you two. 454 00:22:18,800 --> 00:22:21,240 Speaker 6: That is when I was able to see her as 455 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,720 Speaker 6: my person. You know, because we're women, we have so 456 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:27,440 Speaker 6: much in We have more in common with each other 457 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:29,160 Speaker 6: when we than we do with these men. I mean 458 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:33,040 Speaker 6: that is clear as day. When you can find that 459 00:22:33,040 --> 00:22:35,280 Speaker 6: that common ground with a woman, I mean, you feel 460 00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:35,720 Speaker 6: so seen. 461 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:37,080 Speaker 1: It's true. 462 00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:40,520 Speaker 6: I felt so seen by her and so supportive. I 463 00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:43,760 Speaker 6: mean when I left him, I didn't tell my closest 464 00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,120 Speaker 6: friends where I was staying because I was so terrified 465 00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:48,200 Speaker 6: he would find me. I let this woman know where 466 00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:51,480 Speaker 6: I was staying the woman who was like my enemy 467 00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:55,120 Speaker 6: and for no reason over this man. 468 00:22:55,920 --> 00:23:02,159 Speaker 2: Come on, come on, oh my, this is awesome. So 469 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:05,560 Speaker 2: your podcast, as we mentioned, just launched in January. What 470 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:08,119 Speaker 2: are you all tackling together? What are your topics? 471 00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:11,520 Speaker 1: What? What will listeners get when they tune into your podcast? 472 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:13,960 Speaker 3: Us We've already been guessed on this brand new podcast. 473 00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:18,159 Speaker 5: I know we're so grateful. You guys were amazing. You 474 00:23:18,240 --> 00:23:23,120 Speaker 5: had me crying, laughing, feeling hopeful about love. But that's it. 475 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:25,080 Speaker 5: I think that's it. Hopeful in love. 476 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:26,960 Speaker 4: I mean for me, I don't want to speak, I 477 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 4: don't want to speak for you, but I think for me, 478 00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:31,560 Speaker 4: for our podcast is and I don't want it to 479 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:33,360 Speaker 4: be so sappy. 480 00:23:33,400 --> 00:23:34,640 Speaker 5: I want to share our story. 481 00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:37,360 Speaker 4: We could talk about our past, because that's how we 482 00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,959 Speaker 4: grow and we learn. And my biggest like lessons in 483 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:43,160 Speaker 4: life have been from those dark moments. But then let's 484 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:45,480 Speaker 4: talk about moving forward. Like we're talking about dating. She 485 00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:48,040 Speaker 4: gives me dating advice. I'm like, you need to. 486 00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:49,680 Speaker 5: Pick my next guy, and I'm going to pick your 487 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:50,160 Speaker 5: next guy. 488 00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:53,440 Speaker 4: And like it's just we have these funny conversations that 489 00:23:53,760 --> 00:23:55,000 Speaker 4: you know, it's like she's my sister. 490 00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:56,680 Speaker 5: Yeah, that I would have with my sister. 491 00:23:56,720 --> 00:23:59,880 Speaker 6: There's really no topic that is off limits, whether it's 492 00:24:00,080 --> 00:24:03,520 Speaker 6: co parenting with a narcissist or you're, you know. 493 00:24:03,760 --> 00:24:06,359 Speaker 5: Getting getting involved with a new guy. When do you 494 00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:08,080 Speaker 5: introduce the kids? I don't know. 495 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,919 Speaker 6: You know, these are all things that a lot of 496 00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:14,520 Speaker 6: people are dealing with, and I want to make sure 497 00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:17,600 Speaker 6: that people know that an Unlikely Affair is not a 498 00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:19,879 Speaker 6: podcast where you come to hear us just bash our 499 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:25,840 Speaker 6: X like he's actually very insignificant in the bigger picture. 500 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:28,280 Speaker 1: Right, I thought that was a compliment. 501 00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:32,800 Speaker 5: Would ever be a compliment coming out of my mouth? 502 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:34,040 Speaker 5: That made that very cool? 503 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,440 Speaker 1: Wow, she's gonna say something nice about him. 504 00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:40,080 Speaker 2: But actually that was well, I feel that was the 505 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,720 Speaker 2: best get insignificant. 506 00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:45,480 Speaker 6: Yeah, And so it's the dynamic and how we started, 507 00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:48,880 Speaker 6: But ultimately it's like we want to be the podcast 508 00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:51,520 Speaker 6: you come to to hear about. Like, you know, I'm 509 00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:54,119 Speaker 6: thirty five, I don't know how to get back in 510 00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:55,200 Speaker 6: the dating scene. 511 00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,680 Speaker 5: I've got a baby with a sperm. 512 00:24:57,400 --> 00:24:59,920 Speaker 6: Donor, and like some would give me some freaking invice, 513 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:01,520 Speaker 6: I know, I'm not alone. 514 00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:04,760 Speaker 5: A podcast where you feel a little less alone. 515 00:25:04,520 --> 00:25:08,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that we will be tuning in. This 516 00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:11,440 Speaker 2: has been such a pleasure getting to know the two 517 00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:14,080 Speaker 2: of you, and I love the idea that we can 518 00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:16,440 Speaker 2: be down, we can get knocked down. 519 00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:20,840 Speaker 1: And seeing people. I think people love to knock people 520 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:21,919 Speaker 1: down and to contribute to that. 521 00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:24,639 Speaker 2: But then everyone wants you to rise from the ashes 522 00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,840 Speaker 2: and to be those women that other women can look to. 523 00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:30,920 Speaker 2: You know how many women are going through different versions 524 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:33,879 Speaker 2: of what you all, and they've played different roles. But 525 00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:36,040 Speaker 2: everyone wants to have a good guy and a bad guy, 526 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:38,000 Speaker 2: or a good girl and a bad girl, and we're 527 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:40,439 Speaker 2: sometimes we're all of the above. Yeah, and if we 528 00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:44,480 Speaker 2: can just rise above it and join together. I love 529 00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:47,760 Speaker 2: your story and I think it's so inspiring. I'm so 530 00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:48,639 Speaker 2: happy that. 531 00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:51,360 Speaker 1: We met you and we're going to be listening for you. 532 00:25:51,720 --> 00:25:52,920 Speaker 5: Thank you guys so much.