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Speaker 1: Hey, Hello, Hello, Hello.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Unofficial Expert Podcast with Sydney and Marie.

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Speaker 1: Hi, guys, Hello Sidney, what's up?

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Speaker 2: How you doing? Oh I'm good. I'm tired. I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you came in real. I want to say cranky, but like,

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Speaker 2: I'm not. I'm not a morning person. I'm not listen

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Speaker 2: two o'clock that's when i'm my best me. Before that,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, Okay, what are we doing. Let's hurry up

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Speaker 2: because I'm tired. What were you doing at two o'clock

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Speaker 2: last night? I went to bed, Matt early.

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Speaker 1: I'm just tired.

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Speaker 2: I'm like a tired person. You know, there's such a

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Speaker 2: thing as getting too much sleep, right, Like that's a thing. Well,

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Speaker 2: I biked all day yesterday, so I was tired from that.

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Speaker 2: So I literally got up early, went to brunch with

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Speaker 2: the bike, went to a show with the bike.

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Speaker 1: The bike.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm like, this bike thing is annoying, but it's good.

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Speaker 2: I need it because I need the cardio. I mean also,

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Speaker 2: your legs, I mean your legs are already good, so

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Speaker 2: I can't really see a difference, but.

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Speaker 1: They just look like you had good legs before.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but I need the cardio. I need to get

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Speaker 2: my you had good legs and crappy cardio. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: need to get the blood flowing. I need to make

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Speaker 2: sure my legs are not itching. Walk. No, they don't.

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Speaker 2: So I'm doing a good job for myself. So some

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Speaker 2: of y'all listening might not know this, but like sometimes

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Speaker 2: people who are not as active as others, when they

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Speaker 2: start to walk or they try to.

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Speaker 1: Run, their legs start eaching.

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Speaker 2: And that's legit just the blood circulating in your legs.

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Speaker 1: Like wait, what we stand and move forward? Mind you?

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Speaker 2: I was like, oh, I think I have like the

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Speaker 2: hives or I feel like I have like a skin

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Speaker 2: skin rest. Sydney would be like I didn't put any

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Speaker 2: lotion on today, and I'm like, dude, it's inside, it's

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Speaker 2: underneath the ash. But now we know that it's because

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Speaker 2: you know she won't really be walking you you walk

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Speaker 2: to Ubers. Well, no, I'm actually I don't itch anymore

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Speaker 2: because I'm being more active. So I'm doing great gay

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Speaker 2: stuff for myself. That's beautiful. I'm glad because I would

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Speaker 2: walk with you, and remember we try to go to

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Speaker 2: the park for a run and you were.

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Speaker 1: Like, just go on without me.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, it was so sad. And then

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Speaker 2: we went to your sister's boot camp on Saturday and

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Speaker 2: I could not keep up. I literally felt like I

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Speaker 2: was gonna faint. And then all these people in the

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Speaker 2: park were like, well, she's the thinnest one.

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Speaker 1: Why is she not She looks so in shape, and

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Speaker 1: it's like, nah, dude.

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Speaker 2: I was doing crunches and I needed like modified everything

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Speaker 2: pig her body. I could not. I was like, I

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Speaker 2: got a lot of weights, you couldn't crack. I had

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Speaker 2: a wig on, so the wig was heavy as well.

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Speaker 2: I was working out with a wig. So listen, if

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Speaker 2: anybody's interested in coming to the boot camp, it's nine

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Speaker 2: am every Saturday at Washington Square Park. Yeah, it's great

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Speaker 2: in Manhattan. Don't wear a wig to boot camp. Please

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Speaker 2: don't because I feel like that's added weight. It's so

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Speaker 2: much weight, not ready to sweat.

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Speaker 1: The wig gets heavy.

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Speaker 2: And she had a hat on. I had a hat on.

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Speaker 2: And then we had to run laps and I was like, oh, eight,

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Speaker 2: all eight, and then no that we had to run

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Speaker 2: extra because y'all were late. Yeah, that's so fuck that

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Speaker 2: boot camp ship. It should be for every man's for itself.

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Speaker 2: Like that. Why the whole group gotta suffer because of

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Speaker 2: a late bitch. I know they should have made y'all

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Speaker 2: run the ten and let me just run a cool eight.

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Speaker 2: I said, y'all could leave me, leave it, just leave

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Speaker 2: without me, go on with it, go on without me anyway.

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Speaker 1: That was that's what we're doing.

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Speaker 2: Uh. We were getting our summer bodies right for the fall. Nah,

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Speaker 2: my shit's gonna be ready by the winter time. I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna have a twelve pack when it's like two degrees outside.

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Speaker 1: Watch under a bubble coat. Watch, I'm gonna.

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Speaker 2: Have a midriff on and it's gonna be like a

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Speaker 2: blizzard going on. You're gonna right underneath my bubble coat.

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Speaker 2: It's gonna you know, you're gonna have like a like

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Speaker 2: a half bubble coat.

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Speaker 1: Like a hood rat.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, a baby fat. I might have a little

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Speaker 2: baby fat, a white baby fat with like with the

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Speaker 2: for her with the rat horse for like a blend

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Speaker 2: with the squirrel, a blend with like some pigeon. Oh man,

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Speaker 2: I having like pigeon feathers and duck. Okay, I was like,

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Speaker 2: pigeons don't have her. But Sidney, what the hell were

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Speaker 2: you an expert in this week. Well, I finally cooked

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Speaker 2: for my girlfriend for the first time in three years,

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Speaker 2: for the first time, I made lasagna. And now I

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Speaker 2: made breakfast, And now what did you make for breakfast?

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Speaker 2: I feel like you made peeb and J's or nah, girl,

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Speaker 2: I made like a cute little like roasted tomatoes with

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Speaker 2: like a garlic and cheese, Like it sounds like blended

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Speaker 2: ches tomato and half threw some cheese on top and

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Speaker 2: then like threw a garlic at it. But your basic

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Speaker 2: basified my ship. Don't make it basic. It was cute

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Speaker 2: the season, it was great. I made turkey bacon. I

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Speaker 2: put it in the oven, so it was like.

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Speaker 1: Dude, just threw everything in the pan and then cooked.

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Speaker 2: You're fucking hat, Listen, this is what this is the

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Speaker 2: moves that I'm making in a relationship.

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Speaker 1: So last night I made tacos.

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Speaker 2: I made ground turkey tacos and shredded chicken tacos or whatever,

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Speaker 2: and it was so freaking good that I was like,

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Speaker 2: these are for her. You said it was so freaking good, Well,

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Speaker 2: you have your girlfriend here to talk about. She took

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Speaker 2: some for tour. They were good.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she does wanted that stuff atter her house.

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Speaker 2: No, I bought everything the same day fresh from Key Foods,

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Speaker 2: so you know it goes bad the next day, so

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Speaker 2: I definitely had to cook everything right away.

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Speaker 1: You made soft tacos, hard tacos. I made both.

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Speaker 2: She had options and they were the Accouts Ramonts I had. Obviously,

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Speaker 2: we had some tomatoes, We had onions, we had lettuce,

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Speaker 2: we had shredded cheese, we had sour cream, we had

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Speaker 2: hot sauce, mouthed sauce. Dude, what I feel like, tacos

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Speaker 2: is a pretty basic thing to make you just to

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Speaker 2: shred the girl in relationship with me. I'm just why

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Speaker 2: you I'm cutting my ship down. Did you cook the

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Speaker 2: ground turkey or I did? Okay, well then that's cooking.

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Speaker 2: And I had the season and everything. Okay, all right,

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Speaker 2: so uh stand down, let me live. Adrian was very happy,

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Speaker 2: but listen, I hate the tacos, and I was like, man,

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Speaker 2: I would want to marry me today.

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Speaker 1: She better have a ring ready for you. Thuk, Oh

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Speaker 1: my god.

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Speaker 2: You think Adrian is the one that's gonna propose, It's

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Speaker 2: not gonna be you. Honestly, I feel like we're just

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Speaker 2: gonna be real regular.

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Speaker 1: Y'are both take a knee at the same Who need rings.

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Speaker 2: We're in a partnership. You don't need a ring. We

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Speaker 2: don't need a man. We don't need a wedding. Who

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Speaker 2: needs to do all that ship that's for everybody else.

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Speaker 2: So y'all gonna go to the Justice of the peace. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that's what we do.

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Speaker 1: Probably y'all both canna wear suits pants, suits.

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Speaker 2: I'm a come in there with a yoga pant, a

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Speaker 2: white yoga pan, a white Lulu Lemon that's disgusting.

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Speaker 1: Active wear that's gross.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna have white an all white Ivy park a

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Speaker 2: little like a veil though, Like, yeah, I'm gonna have

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Speaker 2: like a what do they have those parachute pants'mna have

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Speaker 2: that on maybe like a little windbreaker jumpsuit thing win suit, Yes, yeah, winsuit.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna wear win suit for my wedding anyway.

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Speaker 2: So I do thank you so much for this past week.

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Speaker 2: Let's talk about what I was an expert at. I

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Speaker 2: was an expert at finding Game of Thrones and not

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Speaker 2: having HBO. So I'm not gonna tell y'all what streaming

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Speaker 2: service that I use because I don't need y'all to,

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Speaker 2: you know, clog up the website. It's ending your business

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Speaker 2: sliding my DMS, and I'll tell you what it is.

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Speaker 2: So I was an expert at like just finding like

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Speaker 2: where to stream that, but also I was an expert

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Speaker 2: this week.

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Speaker 1: At receiving dick pics.

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Speaker 2: Last time you were here, I was like, no one

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Speaker 2: ever sends me dick pics. They know better, Like legit,

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Speaker 2: three penises are sitting in my DMS right now?

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Speaker 1: What no words, just dicks. Oh yeah, that happens to

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Speaker 1: me on Facebook a lot.

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Speaker 2: And what's crazy is that it'll be like a distinguished

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Speaker 2: older man that I'm like, oh, it'll be somebody with

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Speaker 2: a salt.

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Speaker 1: And pepper haircut, peper puw Yeah. And then I'm like, Yo,

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Speaker 1: they don't even that dick, don't even match the profile

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Speaker 1: pick that you got going on here.

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Speaker 2: Yo, I've been getting I got a dick last night,

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Speaker 2: just the dick.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, you're not even gonna introduce yourself

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Speaker 1: or no good evening, No good evening. Hey, queen peace queen,

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Speaker 1: here's a picture of my dick.

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Speaker 2: Mee, just hold on. I'm I'm trying to get to

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Speaker 2: my d MS because you know, I didn't accept none

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Speaker 2: of these requests. Oh, you got to accept him. Oh no, Sydney,

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Speaker 2: you don't want to. I don't want to accept any

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Speaker 2: of them. Here's one dick, and it's a beige dick.

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Speaker 2: I didn't even I didn't even know. That's fucking rude.

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Speaker 2: It's still fuzzy because I was like, no, I don't

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Speaker 2: want to see it.

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Speaker 1: It looked like a puffsicle. Mind you. His name is

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Speaker 1: lost in confusion, lost in the confusion. Let me give

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Speaker 1: you another dick.

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Speaker 2: Hold on at him, somebody at him, lost in confusion,

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Speaker 2: in the confusion.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna rate that penis a good old six. I mean,

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Speaker 1: it's quite the six point five.

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Speaker 2: I'm not here for the dick.

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Speaker 1: That dick looked like you don't have no type of job.

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Speaker 1: That dick is on his mom's couch right now.

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Speaker 2: It looks like a pullout catch. There's another dick. I'm

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Speaker 2: not even gonna tap it for you. Oh that's a

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Speaker 2: black fla dick. It looks short. It looks short. Also,

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Speaker 2: he looked like he got chubby hamed. It looks like

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Speaker 2: it needs a ladder or stepping stool. Dude, I don't know,

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Speaker 2: but uh, those are the dicks that I got in

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Speaker 2: the last couple of days. So I was an expert

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Speaker 2: at just you know, being my best Christian self, curving

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Speaker 2: dicks and getting uh getting that Game of Thrones dick.

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Speaker 2: Well there was no dick in the first episode, but

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Speaker 2: you know, oh really, no, I don't remember. I feel

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Speaker 2: like that's why everybody watch it because of the dude. No.

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Speaker 1: I watched for the dragons.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I watched for the dragons and John snow, I

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Speaker 2: he does it. That's it. That sounds born. Wow. People

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Speaker 2: were running home to go watch fucking Game of Thrones,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I don't get it. I had

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Speaker 2: a show and I was like, I didn't realize until

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Speaker 2: I left my house said it was Game of Thrones to.

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Speaker 1: Day and I was like, damn, I should just tell her.

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Speaker 2: I'm sick.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I don't understand what the big deal is.

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Speaker 2: I don't either, but our guess is a pretty big deal.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, such a big deal.

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Speaker 2: And we're having a great topic today because I definitely

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Speaker 2: need some help on that. I do. I'm not good

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Speaker 2: at it.

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Speaker 1: Do you know what the topic is?

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Speaker 2: Yes? I do, because it's not really what it is

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Speaker 2: that you I don't think it is what it's the

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Speaker 2: opposite what I think you think it is. Our guest

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Speaker 2: today is is a comedian and she's a writer, she's

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Speaker 2: an actress. She's our breakup relationship expert and our rebound

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Speaker 2: six experts.

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Speaker 1: Oh, so that's what you need.

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Speaker 2: Help, let me help on it.

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Speaker 1: It's Julia Rossi.

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Speaker 2: Julia Hi. Julia.

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Speaker 1: I was like, I'll take I like this title. It's

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Speaker 1: a great title. I mean, we were not to shorten

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Speaker 1: it for the iTunes.

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Speaker 2: So you're just going to be like, you're the breakup true,

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Speaker 2: you're the breakup expert.

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Speaker 3: I've never seen Game of Thrones. I just want to

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Speaker 3: put that out there. Thank you, and I have HBO.

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Speaker 1: Funk would you thank you?

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Speaker 2: It's not on purpose.

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Speaker 4: I just get weird about stuff that's in other dimensions

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Speaker 4: of fantasy.

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Speaker 2: She's not even using her privilege, Like how dare you

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Speaker 2: have HBO? And you're not even going to dibble dabble

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Speaker 2: into the HBO movies.

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Speaker 4: I just watched Defiant Ones, which was so good, the

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Speaker 4: documentary Doctor Dre and Jimmy.

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Speaker 2: I mean, what's that about.

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Speaker 4: Oh, it's about how trip like the creation of like

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Speaker 4: Innerscope Records and bh.

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Speaker 1: Okay did they talk about how he used to be

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Speaker 1: his ex wife.

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Speaker 4: They it wasn't his ex wife, it was a reporter

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Speaker 4: she was on.

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Speaker 2: But he did be his wife though doctor dre he

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Speaker 2: threwsome chick down the stairs. Yeah, it was in the

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Speaker 2: actual like straight out of Compton movie they talked about

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Speaker 2: they talked to that woman and him.

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Speaker 1: Oh she was They let her be in the documentary.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it was really good.

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Speaker 4: And I also, I don't want to say this because

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Speaker 4: I don't want any dick pics to not send them

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Speaker 4: to me.

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Speaker 3: But I've never gotten a dick peg.

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Speaker 1: I said that last.

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Speaker 2: Week right there in this living room, and somebody, two

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Speaker 2: people sent me dicks.

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Speaker 4: I had to beg and request them from like people

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Speaker 4: I was looking up with and I don't know. They're like,

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Speaker 4: I respect you. I'm like, oh, disrespect me. I only

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Speaker 4: want to be disrespected when I request it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I don't want to. Dicks are ugly things. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I want to see them. If you think a.

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Speaker 2: Watch somebody send you a dick pic with like the

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Speaker 2: dick got a little like suit on, a little top

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Speaker 2: hand at face on it. You're gonna dress them up

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Speaker 2: like mister Penis with a little monocle.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, please don't send me the monocle right on the tip.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh.

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Speaker 4: Sorry, they're gonna say the w B.

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Speaker 1: Give me a plane in the background.

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Speaker 2: Kenny G.

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Speaker 1: Dick pic. Do you think Kenny G sends dick pics?

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Speaker 4: Definitely is really funny on the Internet Twitter.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I think he sends pictures of saxophones. That's

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Speaker 2: what he probably his.

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Speaker 4: Pictures of himself playing a sax. He's like, do you

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Speaker 4: like good Sacks? He's real funny. If Kenny G is listening,

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Speaker 4: I would love to be your friend.

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Speaker 1: Kenny G.

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Speaker 2: Hit us up.

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Speaker 1: You could be our Sacks.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna add him on this at Kenny G. I'm

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Speaker 2: looking for him on Instagram right now. Kenny.

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Speaker 3: Also, I want to know what products he uses in

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Speaker 3: his hair.

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Speaker 1: Probably shame oisture. No, he looks like a type dude.

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Speaker 2: Yeah you think so?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, definite is just out of them.

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Speaker 2: He uses fruit trees. He honestly will his stuff be

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Speaker 2: a little crunchy, So I feel like it's like a

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Speaker 2: jail Yeah, like a like a pink jel like from

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Speaker 2: the beauty supply store that costs like ninety ninety Look.

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Speaker 1: At that look at Kenny nineteen nineteen ninety three.

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Speaker 2: But what does he look like now? A black and

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Speaker 2: white curl. He looks like Howard stern O. No, Kenny,

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Speaker 2: he looks like Howard's clean brother. Okay, well both the

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Speaker 2: Kenny g We need to talk about this breakup expertise

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Speaker 2: you got going on here?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, us take us through.

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Speaker 2: Your dating my situation. Yeah, like when's the first young

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Speaker 2: first kiss? Halloween, first kiss, seventh grade? It's funny.

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Speaker 4: This week I was in Boston and I was I

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Speaker 4: went to the park with my nieces and it was

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Speaker 4: the park where I had my first kiss and like

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Speaker 4: got flooded with.

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Speaker 2: I was like super rejected.

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Speaker 4: Like when I was a teenager, I had like, no,

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Speaker 4: who has game when they're twelve but body?

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Speaker 2: But still, anybody who has game as a kid was

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Speaker 2: molested for sure. No, anybody who has a game as

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Speaker 2: a kid is fat. Now I probably got like a

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Speaker 2: kids and never left the town they started.

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Speaker 4: I was like I always went after guys that like

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Speaker 4: ignored me when I was a teenager and like into college.

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Speaker 3: So that was like my first kiss.

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Speaker 4: And then I didn't have any boyfriends in high school.

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Speaker 4: I just had like guys that I liked that were like, I.

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Speaker 3: Don't like you. I'm like cool, I'll call you tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: You know. Uh.

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Speaker 3: That was like my thing.

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Speaker 2: I didn't have any I wasn't allowed to date in

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Speaker 2: high school. I feel like I'm still not I allowed

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Speaker 2: to date. My parents are not here for it. I

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Speaker 2: people would like write me notes, and it was always

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Speaker 2: like the nastiest dude who couldn't really spell and even

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Speaker 2: like folded, like he wouldn't even fold it. Cute. I

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Speaker 2: don't know if you went to school when people were like, oh,

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Speaker 2: you had to pull things and the note popped.

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Speaker 1: Open like a pop up book.

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Speaker 2: And this guy wrote me a note and he asked

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Speaker 2: me out, and I was like.

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Speaker 1: Well, you know, I gotta I'm.

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Speaker 2: Gonna say no, but I'm gonna say it nice, right,

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Speaker 2: And so he thought I liked him because I was

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Speaker 2: really nice about it. And found out a couple of

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Speaker 2: years ago he killed two people and that he.

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Speaker 1: Was in jail for us his life. So Dodge that Dick.

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Speaker 2: I was always the person who liked people. So I

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Speaker 2: would go on the Yellow Pages and look for their

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Speaker 2: phone number. I would get their parents' number, of their

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Speaker 2: parents full name. I would call the fucking house and

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Speaker 2: ask for them, and then they would pick up, and

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Speaker 2: then I would hang up. That's what I would do.

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Speaker 2: I would go to the parents full name. Oh, people

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Speaker 2: would always say their mom's first name. At school.

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Speaker 4: Oh, you could get I used to with My first

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Speaker 4: lived down the street from me, so I would walk

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Speaker 4: by his house. My sister had a crush and like

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Speaker 4: had hooked up with his older brother. So then when

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Speaker 4: she got a car, we would do drive bys. But

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Speaker 4: I don't even know what we were looking for, like, oh,

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Speaker 4: he's home, cool.

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Speaker 1: And then speed away.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: And then the guy that I gave my first hand

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Speaker 4: job to in high school, damn, I mean my boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: But then he wasn't even your boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: No, and then he well he acts a little hands too.

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Speaker 2: Let me see these are little hands. No.

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Speaker 4: I got like it's so funny as I've gotten a

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Speaker 4: lot of a handful of day hands.

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Speaker 1: Though you got thick hands.

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Speaker 4: Got like three comments on YouTube from very serious comedy

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Speaker 4: experts that are like, funny, but her.

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Speaker 3: Hands are too big, or he's got man hands.

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Speaker 2: You know, they're definitely not man hands, but I feel

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Speaker 2: like you have a grip, Like you definitely need lube

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Speaker 2: when you do it. I wouldn't. I wouldn't dry hand

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Speaker 2: job there.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I was like gripping like logs of salami as a.

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Speaker 1: Child, even palm a basketball.

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00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,480
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah I got I got a pretty sturdy grip.

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00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:02,000
Speaker 2: But she said, you got w NBA hands. Thank you.

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00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:05,600
Speaker 1: They also been back really far like that.

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00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:07,439
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, they've been. I know, no one can

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Speaker 3: see it's listening.

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00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,480
Speaker 2: So your first hand job was in high school, can't.

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00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:13,359
Speaker 4: Yeah, during the movie I do talk about this on

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Speaker 4: stage to start for myself, but it was during the

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Speaker 4: movie Mighty Ducks Too.

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Speaker 3: We called it Mighty Dicks Too is always a comedian.

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Speaker 2: And uh yeah.

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Speaker 4: He we couldn't date because his mom got caller ID

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Speaker 4: while we were talking. That was like I don't know

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Speaker 4: if yayo we call it. It was like pre dating.

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Speaker 4: So we were talking and then we had to stop

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Speaker 4: talking because his mom got caller ID and he was like,

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Speaker 4: why did you call me thirty times?

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Speaker 3: I was like, oh, well, you weren't answering and I

400
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:47,560
Speaker 3: want to, you know, just make sure girl. Yeah, you know,

401
00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:48,960
Speaker 3: I just want to make sure you got it.

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00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:53,160
Speaker 4: And yeah, So that didn't work out, so I didn't

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00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:57,040
Speaker 4: have like my first you know, mutual relationship where both

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00:17:57,080 --> 00:18:01,000
Speaker 4: parties were in agreement till.

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Speaker 3: Let's see the.

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00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:05,280
Speaker 4: Beginning of my junior year of college. So like right

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Speaker 4: before I turned twenty, Well.

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00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:08,920
Speaker 2: That makes sense. Yeah, I feel like that's when everybody

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00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,320
Speaker 2: had like real relationships, a.

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Speaker 1: Real relationship, but I did high school.

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00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,640
Speaker 2: High school is not real relationships.

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00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:15,119
Speaker 1: It's not.

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00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:16,600
Speaker 4: But I do feel like I had a lot of

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00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:18,520
Speaker 4: friends who were like my ex boyfriend this and then

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Speaker 4: this boyfriend, and I felt.

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00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:21,680
Speaker 2: Very they were touched by their uncles. I'm telling you.

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00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:26,000
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not gonna okay, yeah, we'll say it

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00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:26,320
Speaker 2: for you.

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00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:30,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't write a BuzzFeed article, no.

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00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:35,399
Speaker 1: Podcast.

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00:18:37,920 --> 00:18:38,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

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00:18:38,320 --> 00:18:41,199
Speaker 4: So, and then that first boyfriend ended up being the

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Speaker 4: person that I married.

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Speaker 1: So we were like, wait, marry your first boyfriend.

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00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:46,920
Speaker 2: Wait you were married? I was married.

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00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:47,160
Speaker 4: Yeah.

427
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:50,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's here to talk about breakups. Yeah and divorce.

428
00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:55,400
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah we were. We were together for eight.

429
00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:57,160
Speaker 3: Years, but we were only married a year.

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00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:01,360
Speaker 2: Whoa, Yeah, so you were together first seven, got married,

431
00:19:01,680 --> 00:19:05,679
Speaker 2: lasted for a year. Yeah, we broke up. I broke up.

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00:19:05,720 --> 00:19:08,879
Speaker 4: We broke up once for real, and then a second time.

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00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:11,160
Speaker 4: It only lasted like a few days. But he's great

434
00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:14,920
Speaker 4: we're still friends. He's like, yeah, but wait, why seven?

435
00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:15,679
Speaker 1: Let's back up.

436
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:18,919
Speaker 2: That's why seven, Like you spent seven years without marrying him.

437
00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:20,760
Speaker 2: All of a sudden, you were like, you know what.

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00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:23,360
Speaker 3: My god, how long is this podcast?

439
00:19:25,119 --> 00:19:25,679
Speaker 1: You got to.

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00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:33,800
Speaker 2: It's uh we you know, so you guys dated junior

441
00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:39,040
Speaker 2: year and senior year of high school, college.

442
00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,480
Speaker 4: Half of junior year, half of senior year, and then

443
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:43,520
Speaker 4: after that up until yeah, like for years.

444
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:45,800
Speaker 1: So how does that? How did guess that work?

445
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:49,199
Speaker 4: He we we were very we were friends before we

446
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:53,200
Speaker 4: were dated, so like our relationship was very friendship.

447
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,560
Speaker 2: Based, so you were being a relationship and then he

448
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:58,000
Speaker 2: would come and like hold your hand and make you

449
00:19:58,040 --> 00:19:58,520
Speaker 2: feel better.

450
00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:02,040
Speaker 1: If the guy was it would both be in relationships.

451
00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:04,080
Speaker 4: And then when one of us, yeah, like he was like,

452
00:20:04,080 --> 00:20:05,320
Speaker 4: the guy would go to get advice.

453
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:06,680
Speaker 2: Okay, I just knew this guy.

454
00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:07,760
Speaker 3: Why isn't he calling me?

455
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:12,119
Speaker 4: And I was like, yeah, I know, I really I

456
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:16,520
Speaker 4: really had good self esteem and so I, uh yeah,

457
00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:19,320
Speaker 4: so we just we fell in love and he's waiting.

458
00:20:19,359 --> 00:20:21,199
Speaker 2: Now this sounds like a like a rom com, like

459
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,840
Speaker 2: White People romantic comedy movie. Like he's Ashton Kutcher and

460
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,480
Speaker 2: you're obviously nilakun.

461
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:27,680
Speaker 3: Is because he's very white.

462
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:31,159
Speaker 2: I'm like, I just we just assumed, Okay, I have

463
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:34,280
Speaker 2: Sydney were when she said we're talking, I was like,

464
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:38,080
Speaker 2: maybe when you said that, you start talking in high school.

465
00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:38,639
Speaker 2: It's so funny.

466
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:40,080
Speaker 4: The guy I was talking to high school was black.

467
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:43,320
Speaker 4: I know, no, but I mean my ex husband is

468
00:20:43,359 --> 00:20:46,680
Speaker 4: like white white, like like like Polish ethnic white.

469
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:51,440
Speaker 2: He's like main white. Yeah, yeah, you can't cape yeah,

470
00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:52,440
Speaker 2: cape Cod.

471
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:56,560
Speaker 3: I'm like, you get it, tan, but you're Italian. I'm Italian.

472
00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:57,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's still white.

473
00:20:57,880 --> 00:20:59,640
Speaker 1: You can catch a cat.

474
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:02,760
Speaker 4: I use my privilege when I can, but I also

475
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,240
Speaker 4: feel good that I can walk through certain neighborhoods and

476
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:06,840
Speaker 4: be like what I'm Latina, Like when.

477
00:21:06,680 --> 00:21:09,399
Speaker 2: Do you really You're like, oh, okay, I'm definitely didn't

478
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:09,920
Speaker 2: fund the block.

479
00:21:10,080 --> 00:21:11,840
Speaker 1: I'm like and whatever you need me to be.

480
00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:14,640
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, listen, Jennifer Lopez is white into all

481
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:15,600
Speaker 2: of the movies that she.

482
00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:17,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, and she's brilliant.

483
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, and she's.

484
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:20,720
Speaker 2: Definitely not Puerto Rican in enough. Yeah.

485
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:24,879
Speaker 1: And Jelie I think she was like super Italian.

486
00:21:25,280 --> 00:21:26,920
Speaker 4: I just feel like when you have like my parents

487
00:21:26,960 --> 00:21:29,040
Speaker 4: are immigrants, so I feel like when you have that,

488
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:31,760
Speaker 4: it's hard for me to be like, I'm not white

489
00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:33,280
Speaker 4: white because there's like a grunge.

490
00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:35,440
Speaker 2: Were you next to us? Girl?

491
00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:36,359
Speaker 1: You are white white?

492
00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:38,239
Speaker 2: I forget, But I know what you mean about your

493
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,760
Speaker 2: parents immigrants, Like my parents are immigrants too, And I

494
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:42,800
Speaker 2: feel like when I talk to black folks, I'd be

495
00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:43,240
Speaker 2: like where.

496
00:21:43,119 --> 00:21:43,720
Speaker 1: You are people from?

497
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,679
Speaker 2: And they'd be like here, and I'll be like you

498
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:50,760
Speaker 2: just regular black? So like you're not regular white, You're yeah.

499
00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:55,399
Speaker 3: You know you story about the lunches, right, yeah? The food? Yeah,

500
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 3: I mean that's my life.

501
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:56,880
Speaker 2: Yeah.

502
00:21:56,920 --> 00:21:58,520
Speaker 1: The way that my parents packed food.

503
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,920
Speaker 2: Is like, like's gonta spill, so let's tape it, throw

504
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:02,680
Speaker 2: it in a bag.

505
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:06,160
Speaker 4: And like so many bags make it look like.

506
00:22:06,480 --> 00:22:07,200
Speaker 3: How many bags?

507
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:09,840
Speaker 2: So you were married with this dude? You guys got

508
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:13,760
Speaker 2: a divorce? How did that end? So basically I was

509
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:14,720
Speaker 2: before I got married.

510
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:20,360
Speaker 4: I knew this, okay, So I didn't know what else

511
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:22,800
Speaker 4: to do with my life. So I suggested we get

512
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,800
Speaker 4: married because everyone else was getting married and it felt

513
00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:26,639
Speaker 4: like the right thing to do and what you should

514
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:27,240
Speaker 4: do and.

515
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,639
Speaker 3: All that like should ship.

516
00:22:28,960 --> 00:22:32,200
Speaker 4: That is very If anyone is listening and you find

517
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:35,040
Speaker 4: yourself saying the word should a lot. That should be

518
00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:38,400
Speaker 4: an alert. Then that goes for like career for anything, like.

519
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:40,680
Speaker 1: I should be doing this. I should do this, it's

520
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:41,120
Speaker 1: my job.

521
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, I should like this person. They seem really great,

522
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,040
Speaker 4: like and if you're high. Also, my therapist is like,

523
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 4: whenever your voice goes into a higher optics, I'll be like, oh,

524
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:52,920
Speaker 4: I should go Like that means I'm lying to myself.

525
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 2: But yeah, my voice is there pretty often.

526
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,080
Speaker 1: Yeah that's just because I'm like trying to pull a point.

527
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:03,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, but that's still you still have that like you're

528
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:03,800
Speaker 2: not like.

529
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:08,040
Speaker 4: I don't know like that like wine, yeah, Mickey mouse help.

530
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 1: But before you guys got married, you kind of Oh,

531
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:11,200
Speaker 1: I knew.

532
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:12,480
Speaker 3: I was like losing my mind.

533
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:13,879
Speaker 4: I was like I was living in New York and

534
00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:14,960
Speaker 4: then I was like we should get married and move

535
00:23:15,000 --> 00:23:16,919
Speaker 4: to the suburbs of Boston because I don't know what

536
00:23:16,920 --> 00:23:18,879
Speaker 4: I'm doing with my career. I like I wanted to

537
00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:21,240
Speaker 4: quit everything. I was like I should be normal, Like.

538
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:24,480
Speaker 2: Did you have any girlfriends? Like, like, do you have

539
00:23:24,480 --> 00:23:27,440
Speaker 2: any girls around you? Telling you like no, I mean

540
00:23:27,720 --> 00:23:28,920
Speaker 2: there's something else.

541
00:23:28,760 --> 00:23:31,960
Speaker 4: You could do better, like it, Well, the do better

542
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,960
Speaker 4: is a tough one because he's a great guy. Like

543
00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:36,960
Speaker 4: we really it wasn't like we were arguing.

544
00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:40,639
Speaker 2: There wasn't. We were just really passive aggressive. It was terrible.

545
00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 4: No, the sex was good like it was. I mean

546
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 4: I didn't have a ton of intercourse comparisons. I only

547
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:47,359
Speaker 4: had sex with one other person.

548
00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:51,560
Speaker 2: So yeah, so you don't even know. Yeah, you have

549
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:54,320
Speaker 2: nothing to judge, but now I do judge, and it

550
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:56,160
Speaker 2: was it was good. Like we we communicate.

551
00:23:56,280 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 1: You remember all those different strukes for different folks.

552
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 4: But it was it was just it was bat like

553
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:07,880
Speaker 4: we I knew then. I was like, oh, man, if

554
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 4: only I had met this person, I mean I can't guarantee,

555
00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 4: but like maybe if we had met ten years later,

556
00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:13,639
Speaker 4: it would have been different.

557
00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,440
Speaker 3: But it was just like not the right time.

558
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,040
Speaker 2: So you said, he's a good guy. Where was he working.

559
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:22,440
Speaker 3: He was occupation like TV production. It's like really creative

560
00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:24,280
Speaker 3: and amazing, like supportive.

561
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:27,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, health insurance and stuff he had.

562
00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:29,719
Speaker 3: He had insurance. Yeah, yeah, like it was.

563
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:35,879
Speaker 4: It just the friendship was stronger than I think for me,

564
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,560
Speaker 4: I can't speak for all relationships, but I have found

565
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,320
Speaker 4: that like for me, it kind of has to be

566
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:43,439
Speaker 4: equal parts everything so it's like it can't be like

567
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:45,920
Speaker 4: I want to be friends with them, but we can't

568
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:48,439
Speaker 4: be more friends than we are, like passionate, but it

569
00:24:48,480 --> 00:24:51,120
Speaker 4: can't be all passion and no friendship, no relationship.

570
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:52,320
Speaker 2: I agree, you know what I mean.

571
00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:54,080
Speaker 4: Like, and I also have to feel like they're family

572
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:55,960
Speaker 4: in the sense of they'll like take care of me

573
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,600
Speaker 4: and we have each other's back. But I also don't

574
00:24:57,600 --> 00:24:59,040
Speaker 4: want it to be like, e, you're like my brother,

575
00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:01,680
Speaker 4: like you know, like it's got a kind of all

576
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:02,800
Speaker 4: work in.

577
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:04,240
Speaker 3: A balanced way.

578
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,160
Speaker 4: And I felt like in that relationship the friendship part

579
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,080
Speaker 4: dominated any passion.

580
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,479
Speaker 2: So you married your friend zone, That's what you did.

581
00:25:12,520 --> 00:25:14,960
Speaker 2: You married your friend how they were fist bumping in

582
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:16,159
Speaker 2: the bedroom, there.

583
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:17,360
Speaker 3: Was some high fiving that would happen.

584
00:25:17,480 --> 00:25:21,639
Speaker 2: You had him on the back, good job, yeah yeah,

585
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:23,320
Speaker 2: yeah yeah.

586
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:25,679
Speaker 1: So it ends and now you're divorced.

587
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:27,400
Speaker 2: So what Just.

588
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 4: To back up one second, but I will say friend

589
00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:31,600
Speaker 4: zone because again, if anyone's listening, I think it's very

590
00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:34,119
Speaker 4: easy to do that, because if you think about it,

591
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:38,679
Speaker 4: in my head, I thought relationships were jerks who ignored me,

592
00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:41,480
Speaker 4: that I had to follow right and chase around and

593
00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:44,600
Speaker 4: be like I remember me or a guy that's really

594
00:25:44,600 --> 00:25:46,760
Speaker 4: fucking cool in my buddy. I didn't know that there

595
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:50,880
Speaker 4: was like something else else, right, So yeah.

596
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,359
Speaker 2: One more question, So who's your girlfriends at the time, Like,

597
00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:56,040
Speaker 2: I just want to know who your friends were. They

598
00:25:56,080 --> 00:25:59,720
Speaker 2: weren't telling you to go out their friends. They weren't

599
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:01,679
Speaker 2: out there, Like yeah, he's a good guy, but like

600
00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 2: I feel like you need more experience.

601
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:08,199
Speaker 4: Yeah, I have friends who mentioned it or tried to

602
00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:08,719
Speaker 4: talk about it.

603
00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:09,960
Speaker 2: What they say. I mean.

604
00:26:10,000 --> 00:26:11,680
Speaker 4: I had a couple of friends when I was leaving

605
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:13,840
Speaker 4: New York. I had to really good friends be like,

606
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 4: what do you so you're quitting life? Like they were

607
00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:22,240
Speaker 4: like very concerned, but I'm very good or it used

608
00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:25,679
Speaker 4: to be very good at swaying people to get on board,

609
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 4: like the you know when you like okay, so you

610
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:30,919
Speaker 4: know when you ask someone's opinion, but you do it

611
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:34,840
Speaker 4: in a way where you're exc answer. So I'll be like, okay,

612
00:26:34,840 --> 00:26:36,880
Speaker 4: do you guys think I should stay in New York

613
00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:42,240
Speaker 4: by myself? Ah, move to Boston with this guy, get married,

614
00:26:42,320 --> 00:26:44,439
Speaker 4: live in an apartment rent free that my dad owns,

615
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:47,119
Speaker 4: and like save money and like real like and I

616
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:47,560
Speaker 4: would like.

617
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:54,000
Speaker 1: That sounds great. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like a duck girl,

618
00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:55,720
Speaker 1: you should have gotten married.

619
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:57,879
Speaker 2: Do your dad still.

620
00:26:59,320 --> 00:26:59,880
Speaker 1: In Boston?

621
00:27:01,240 --> 00:27:03,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll save money and boss.

622
00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:07,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I was really I think I was really

623
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:12,520
Speaker 4: good at minimizing. I'm I've learned to be less good

624
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:14,800
Speaker 4: at and I've learned to be better about telling people like, hey,

625
00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:16,639
Speaker 4: I'm in a really bad place and I'm upset or

626
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 4: I'm like feeling depressed.

627
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:20,400
Speaker 2: But I think like a lot of people, i'd be like, oh, fine.

628
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,840
Speaker 1: You know, really good at just seeming fine.

629
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:27,080
Speaker 2: And then when I'm not fine and people ask me,

630
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 2: I'm good at yelling at them until they leave me alone.

631
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:30,720
Speaker 1: So I'm doing really well.

632
00:27:30,800 --> 00:27:33,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We all have our fat yeah,

633
00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:35,719
Speaker 3: our methods. But yeah, I don't know.

634
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,520
Speaker 4: It's it's just at the time, it seemed like what

635
00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:41,920
Speaker 4: I should all caps red letters be doing.

636
00:27:42,080 --> 00:27:44,400
Speaker 2: So who did the who initiated the divorce?

637
00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,920
Speaker 3: I initiated getting married and the divorce.

638
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:55,560
Speaker 2: Damn. Yeah, women, Yo, you're a great team right here.

639
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,080
Speaker 2: I love it when you said you wanted to get

640
00:27:58,200 --> 00:28:00,439
Speaker 2: a divorce. Was he like like, oh my god, thank

641
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 2: you so much for saying.

642
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:04,840
Speaker 4: That, or no, I mean the part of the problem

643
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:10,680
Speaker 4: with our dynamic was he yes, an improv he yes,

644
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:13,760
Speaker 4: and me when I needed more of a I think

645
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:16,199
Speaker 4: we should talk about this like he yeskeed me a

646
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:18,800
Speaker 4: lot and not and then I think, I mean, I

647
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:21,920
Speaker 4: can't speak on his behalf, but I'm sure if if

648
00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 4: someone would talk to him now.

649
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:25,159
Speaker 2: Deeply about it, he'd probably be like, No, I actually.

650
00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:26,760
Speaker 4: Was mad, but I didn't know how to express it

651
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,040
Speaker 4: because we just never wanted to hurt each other's feelings.

652
00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 3: So there's just a lot of enabling.

653
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,400
Speaker 1: I feel like real love, real.

654
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:39,840
Speaker 2: Real love is hurting somebody's feelings every like every other conversation. Yeah,

655
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:41,120
Speaker 2: my feelings I got hurt all the time now in

656
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:41,720
Speaker 2: my relationship.

657
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 3: But you know, I'm a growing way.

658
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know if I'm.

659
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,720
Speaker 2: Growing, but like rolling my eyes, hurt him, hurt someone's

660
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:53,800
Speaker 2: feelings every other conversation, and maybe throw something at them.

661
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 3: Oh I don't know about that.

662
00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 4: Okay, Well that's that was my that was my relationship

663
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:59,520
Speaker 4: about from my marriage. Okay, So okay, so I initiated that. Yeah,

664
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 4: so I basically was like I what I said verbatim

665
00:29:03,160 --> 00:29:05,840
Speaker 4: was I feel like I could take a ship on

666
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:08,360
Speaker 4: your face and you would just wipe it away and

667
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:09,160
Speaker 4: go ah.

668
00:29:09,320 --> 00:29:12,960
Speaker 2: Julia said, yeah, see this is how in the movies

669
00:29:13,000 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 2: you turn a missing that's right there, and your body

670
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,440
Speaker 2: would be shot the mean way.

671
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,760
Speaker 4: I just was like, this is ridiculous. Like I'm because

672
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:22,640
Speaker 4: I was acting out. I was like not coming home

673
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:25,360
Speaker 4: at night. I was like and he just was like,

674
00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:26,720
Speaker 4: he's like, have fun.

675
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:29,960
Speaker 2: You see that. It's good that you left, because it

676
00:29:30,040 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 2: sounds like he was getting ready to start training fight

677
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:36,240
Speaker 2: and yeah, be Jennifer Lopez and enough and oh yeah,

678
00:29:36,320 --> 00:29:36,880
Speaker 2: beat away.

679
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,520
Speaker 1: Yeah that's what it felt like.

680
00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 2: It No, he is.

681
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 4: That is not the way. I do not any want

682
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:45,000
Speaker 4: any defamation of character of my ex.

683
00:29:45,120 --> 00:29:46,800
Speaker 2: You know, he's a great guy. It's just us. We

684
00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:47,760
Speaker 2: are terrible people.

685
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:48,560
Speaker 4: Sound like.

686
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 1: So much Jlo talk. I know, I thought I was Jlo.

687
00:29:54,520 --> 00:29:55,280
Speaker 3: Now he's Jelo.

688
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:56,840
Speaker 1: Who is j Loo?

689
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:58,080
Speaker 2: Yeah?

690
00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:00,800
Speaker 4: No, And and then he was kind of I think

691
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 4: he was in denial at first, and then we talked

692
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:04,959
Speaker 4: about it, and then he finally think he got up

693
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:06,800
Speaker 4: once I was like, so, which one of us is

694
00:30:06,800 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 4: moving out?

695
00:30:07,160 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 2: He was like, oh, you're.

696
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 3: Serious, and I was like yeah, because I was a very.

697
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:13,560
Speaker 4: Boy who cried wolf kind of I think person in

698
00:30:13,560 --> 00:30:15,600
Speaker 4: my twenties, like I would get like hair brain schemes.

699
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:17,600
Speaker 4: I'd be like, Okay, oh my god, I have this

700
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,280
Speaker 4: audition tomorrow and I think I'm gonna get it and

701
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:20,600
Speaker 4: then I'm gonna be rich and then I'm d d

702
00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:22,560
Speaker 4: d d dah and like so I had a lot

703
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,440
Speaker 4: of that. So I think there was a little part

704
00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:26,720
Speaker 4: of him that was like, okay, Julia, Julia is getting

705
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 4: a divorce. Here she goes again with one of her

706
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 4: like wacky ideas. And then when it really started to

707
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:34,640
Speaker 4: be real, we like didn't we obviously didn't know what

708
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 4: would you say.

709
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:36,920
Speaker 2: Which one of us is moving out? Is? Isn't it

710
00:30:37,040 --> 00:30:38,120
Speaker 2: your dad's built you? No?

711
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 3: No, no, oh sorry, we had moved back to New York.

712
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, okay, yeah, we York.

713
00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:47,080
Speaker 4: We moved to Williamsburg because what's happening was when I

714
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 4: got married, we moved to by this hair brain scheme

715
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:51,920
Speaker 4: where I was like, all right, everybody, and I'm really

716
00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:55,120
Speaker 4: I'm good. I should have gone into like I don't know, politics,

717
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:57,680
Speaker 4: being a lawyer or something like that, but like, if

718
00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:00,080
Speaker 4: only I could use this for my career, but I

719
00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:01,960
Speaker 4: I'm really kind of like convincing everyone, Like I said,

720
00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:02,480
Speaker 4: it's a good idea.

721
00:31:02,520 --> 00:31:03,680
Speaker 3: So I was like, all right, here's the plant.

722
00:31:03,840 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 4: We're gonna move to Boston, we're gonna get married, we're

723
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:08,400
Speaker 4: gonna live rent free, we're gonna save some money. Then

724
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:10,719
Speaker 4: maybe i'll like work on a new project and like

725
00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 4: everything'll be great, right, And then I was just after

726
00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 4: that happened, after like a month, I started coming to

727
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,880
Speaker 4: New York by myself for like a couple of days,

728
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:22,239
Speaker 4: like a weekend, and then like flash, yeah, and I

729
00:31:22,280 --> 00:31:23,040
Speaker 4: was spending.

730
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:23,840
Speaker 1: He let you.

731
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:25,800
Speaker 2: Yeah you already was like hi, fun.

732
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:27,719
Speaker 1: Adrianne would be like, okay, I'm coming with you.

733
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:32,560
Speaker 4: Well so okay, yeah, So then well I don't want

734
00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:34,760
Speaker 4: to jump the gun. But then the relationship I had

735
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:38,240
Speaker 4: after was beyond the opposite of this, okay, So it

736
00:31:38,280 --> 00:31:39,680
Speaker 4: was almost like the Three Bears.

737
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:41,760
Speaker 3: It was like too hot, That's what I was gonna say.

738
00:31:41,760 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 2: When I was thinking of everything.

739
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:45,840
Speaker 1: I was like, wow, she's really Goldilocks.

740
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:48,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's the thing is like part of and

741
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 4: I mean, I don't know if I'm going off the

742
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:55,960
Speaker 4: expert topic now, I do think that, you know, it's

743
00:31:55,960 --> 00:31:59,000
Speaker 4: really easy to look at past relationships as like in anything,

744
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 4: even like the guy that I the hand job to

745
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,280
Speaker 4: like all of it included as like mistakes or shame

746
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:07,640
Speaker 4: or embarrassment or failures, but they all lead you to

747
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 4: the next and they all teach you something like I'm

748
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:13,880
Speaker 4: you know it. Not everything I've done has felt good

749
00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:17,400
Speaker 4: at the time, but in retrospect I am. I truly

750
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 4: am grateful for everyone I met because I learned so

751
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:21,680
Speaker 4: much about like what I actually want, Like I know

752
00:32:21,800 --> 00:32:24,600
Speaker 4: exactly the kind of person I can be around now.

753
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:28,720
Speaker 2: It's so funny because everybody is like training to be

754
00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:31,640
Speaker 2: with the person they're really supposed to be with. Everything

755
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:34,840
Speaker 2: is everybody is in the practice run, Like, oh, this

756
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:37,120
Speaker 2: is practice in this relationship.

757
00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 1: This is not how you really do it. This is

758
00:32:38,880 --> 00:32:41,440
Speaker 1: a scratch scratch paper, Yeah, scrap scrap dick.

759
00:32:42,600 --> 00:32:45,240
Speaker 2: I agree. I mean it's funny that you speak of

760
00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:48,600
Speaker 2: a scrap dick because my ex is getting married, he's

761
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:52,200
Speaker 2: engaged or whatever, and everything that he probably did wrong

762
00:32:52,280 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 2: in the relationship with me, he probably flipped it. He

763
00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,080
Speaker 2: was like, oh, I was just running a course on

764
00:32:57,160 --> 00:33:00,280
Speaker 2: that ho. I know how to really treat a woman now.

765
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:04,280
Speaker 4: But I don't think it's it's I don't think it's like, uh,

766
00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 4: intentional I don't think someone you know what I mean,

767
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:08,800
Speaker 4: Like they're not like I'm going to practice on this person.

768
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,200
Speaker 3: It's just it's part of gross.

769
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 2: It's not intentional, but you know when you have that

770
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 2: feeling like I'm gonna be with that person forever. Okay,

771
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 2: I feel like what I'm gonna say, Mike, I get

772
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:25,000
Speaker 2: me in trouble with somebody. But my ex boyfriend would

773
00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:28,360
Speaker 2: complain about stuff that I was not doing in the

774
00:33:28,400 --> 00:33:30,840
Speaker 2: relationship right Like he was like, you're not contributing enough.

775
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:33,280
Speaker 2: And he was like I was living in his apartment

776
00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:36,640
Speaker 2: like rent free, like legit, just living lavish in for

777
00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 2: green And now I live by myself. And every day

778
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 2: I'll wake up and be like something will click in

779
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,800
Speaker 2: my mind, like, oh, you know, I was a really

780
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:50,960
Speaker 2: bad girlfriend, like I know, and now my sister's staying

781
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 2: with me and doing all this, all the things that

782
00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:54,480
Speaker 2: I was doing to him, and I'm like, oh, oh

783
00:33:54,560 --> 00:34:00,840
Speaker 2: my god, at all, but I see it.

784
00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:04,520
Speaker 1: I wasn't doing that all circle. Oh god, this circle

785
00:34:05,040 --> 00:34:05,640
Speaker 1: is so real.

786
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:09,600
Speaker 4: But you learn, I mean you learn from experience, like

787
00:34:09,640 --> 00:34:11,440
Speaker 4: you can learn from like a book or listening to

788
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:14,520
Speaker 4: a podcast or watching a movie, but like real lessons

789
00:34:14,600 --> 00:34:15,799
Speaker 4: stick from experience.

790
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:17,960
Speaker 1: You got to burn your hand to be like I'm

791
00:34:18,000 --> 00:34:18,960
Speaker 1: not touching that exactly.

792
00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:22,480
Speaker 2: Okay, So wait you so after the divorce or whatever

793
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:25,360
Speaker 2: that was done, you got in another relationship, there was

794
00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:28,319
Speaker 2: a lot of rebounding. Yeah, so we separated.

795
00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:31,200
Speaker 4: So we first did because everything.

796
00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:33,799
Speaker 2: Separation is not a full divorce, no, and in the

797
00:34:33,840 --> 00:34:35,799
Speaker 2: process of divorcing exactly, and.

798
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:39,759
Speaker 4: Also because like it's very confusing to get divorced, Like

799
00:34:39,920 --> 00:34:42,360
Speaker 4: the paperwork is very confusing. It is way easier to

800
00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:45,040
Speaker 4: get married than it is divorced. I didn't it was

801
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 4: so many documents you had to fill out, and so

802
00:34:47,600 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 4: neither of us really wanted to spend any money. But

803
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,080
Speaker 4: then finally we googled fast and friendly and we just

804
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:53,839
Speaker 4: paid like eight hundred bucks and it was really easy.

805
00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:55,399
Speaker 1: So much of cause to get a divorce is eight

806
00:34:55,440 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 1: hundred dollars.

807
00:34:56,160 --> 00:34:57,200
Speaker 2: That was like the cheapest.

808
00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:01,280
Speaker 1: What's the more expensive option, like lu like super divorce.

809
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:03,279
Speaker 4: I think more expensive is if you had a lot

810
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:05,400
Speaker 4: of assets to split, like if we had owned a

811
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 4: house and a car and all that stuff. I mean

812
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:08,719
Speaker 4: it was like he's taking the flat screen and I

813
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:10,080
Speaker 4: took like the bread of.

814
00:35:10,239 --> 00:35:13,600
Speaker 2: Someone told me that the paper is so much Someone

815
00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:15,879
Speaker 2: told me that it's so much paperwork, so that by

816
00:35:15,920 --> 00:35:17,359
Speaker 2: the time you get to the middle of it, you're like.

817
00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:18,720
Speaker 1: Do we really want to fucking divorce?

818
00:35:19,080 --> 00:35:21,359
Speaker 2: It's to wear you out and wear you down, it's

819
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:24,319
Speaker 2: up and make you think, hey, maybe we should just

820
00:35:24,480 --> 00:35:25,040
Speaker 2: stay togain.

821
00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:27,719
Speaker 1: Let's try a little harder. Yeah, yeah, that's what it is.

822
00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:30,840
Speaker 2: Try a little harder. And is it really worth doing

823
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:33,479
Speaker 2: all this fucking sheets of paper? You I don't even

824
00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:34,759
Speaker 2: know how to Like, I still don't know how to

825
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:38,279
Speaker 2: fill out like an eleven nine? What is it? What

826
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 2: is that?

827
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:39,080
Speaker 4: What?

828
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:41,759
Speaker 2: I don't even know. They're like, how many exemptions are

829
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:43,920
Speaker 2: you claiming? I always just put three. I don't even

830
00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 2: know what that means.

831
00:35:45,239 --> 00:35:47,960
Speaker 3: I think you get more tiken out, but then.

832
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 1: I get more back with my Maybe.

833
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:55,239
Speaker 2: I don't know, you're going to jail. It's fine, she doesn't.

834
00:35:56,000 --> 00:35:57,480
Speaker 1: Right to me, I need pin pass.

835
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 4: So yeah, so a lot of our relationship and maybe

836
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:04,040
Speaker 4: it was just me at that time. I was a

837
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:06,880
Speaker 4: big procrastinator, So I think I just also just procrastinated

838
00:36:06,920 --> 00:36:08,759
Speaker 4: a divorce, Like in my head we were done, but

839
00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 4: it just was like, oh, I gotta go fill out

840
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:10,920
Speaker 4: this thing.

841
00:36:11,120 --> 00:36:12,239
Speaker 2: So I separated, he.

842
00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:18,320
Speaker 4: Moved out, and then I, immediately I call it burning stage,

843
00:36:19,360 --> 00:36:21,480
Speaker 4: had sex with someone like a week later, just to

844
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,960
Speaker 4: like get it out, get it out and get new in.

845
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:26,440
Speaker 2: You got to cleanse the kuchie palate. That's what you

846
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:26,840
Speaker 2: gotta do.

847
00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:32,520
Speaker 4: And yeah, and I so I hooked up with two

848
00:36:32,560 --> 00:36:34,600
Speaker 4: people and then the third person I hooked up with

849
00:36:34,719 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 4: and this is it was a month later.

850
00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:39,520
Speaker 3: It just stuck and we stayed together.

851
00:36:39,640 --> 00:36:41,239
Speaker 1: And it's like venus flag trap.

852
00:36:41,280 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 2: You got an use like.

853
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:43,160
Speaker 3: Three and a half years.

854
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:45,759
Speaker 1: Three and a half years something about you. You were

855
00:36:45,840 --> 00:36:48,040
Speaker 1: long term, bitch, You're not funny.

856
00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:52,080
Speaker 3: Thing is I didn't think that I was, but you are.

857
00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 4: But you are I know as an adult, I'm looking

858
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:55,280
Speaker 4: at your track record.

859
00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:59,879
Speaker 1: Yeah eight years, yeah the three wait eight years? Eight years?

860
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:00,960
Speaker 1: First boyfriends?

861
00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:03,640
Speaker 2: No, but I but the thing.

862
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:08,680
Speaker 4: Is my mean like I in my like I I

863
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:14,960
Speaker 4: love people pretty easily, but I'm also like very uh horny. Okay,

864
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,759
Speaker 4: I was like, what's the word, not horny? But like

865
00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:20,399
Speaker 4: I think if I had been single, Like there's part

866
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:22,120
Speaker 4: of me that was like I wonder if like the

867
00:37:22,239 --> 00:37:24,319
Speaker 4: universe made me be in a relationship from my early

868
00:37:24,360 --> 00:37:25,600
Speaker 4: twenties because I would have been like.

869
00:37:25,760 --> 00:37:28,600
Speaker 2: To stop you from being a hot Yeah, the universe

870
00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:29,840
Speaker 2: works in your defense.

871
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:30,440
Speaker 1: Paper who knows?

872
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:31,200
Speaker 3: Who knows?

873
00:37:31,239 --> 00:37:35,200
Speaker 2: Because let me tell you boo. Yeah, I got some

874
00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:38,400
Speaker 2: miles on mine. I definitely how many miles and.

875
00:37:42,640 --> 00:37:44,680
Speaker 3: There's a round miles there's I mean.

876
00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:46,080
Speaker 1: But yeah.

877
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:49,440
Speaker 4: So that the relationship after was like the opposite.

878
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:51,879
Speaker 3: He was ethnic. His parents were immigrants, and I.

879
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:55,719
Speaker 2: Was like, oh, because also say ethnic Indian. Yeah, I

880
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:57,239
Speaker 2: was thinking brown.

881
00:37:57,160 --> 00:38:00,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, and yeah. I just kept going shaved down and

882
00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:03,560
Speaker 4: uh until I found the right color that worked with my.

883
00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:05,760
Speaker 2: Yeah.

884
00:38:05,800 --> 00:38:09,439
Speaker 4: But no, I so in that other relationship, I felt

885
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,480
Speaker 4: like I was super I was like, oh, I'm dysfunctional.

886
00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 4: I'm fucked up because here's this nice guy. His parents

887
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:18,040
Speaker 4: are super in love, he's the best. I'm fucking nuts.

888
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:19,719
Speaker 4: I'm the one who can't make a decision. I'm the

889
00:38:19,719 --> 00:38:22,840
Speaker 4: one with crazy immigrant parents that like argue all the time.

890
00:38:23,120 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 4: So I was like, this is my problem, right, Like

891
00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:27,879
Speaker 4: I really made it me. So then when I met

892
00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:30,799
Speaker 4: someone who was also immigrant parents, like, I was.

893
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:32,920
Speaker 1: Like, your dad hit you, my dad hit you high fab.

894
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 3: You know like that. And he was very passionate.

895
00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:39,359
Speaker 4: He was very protective and jealous and like all the things,

896
00:38:39,440 --> 00:38:40,680
Speaker 4: like he would never have been.

897
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:42,800
Speaker 1: The fire to the other guy's. Yeah.

898
00:38:42,840 --> 00:38:45,799
Speaker 4: Like literally, if I was late at night, he would

899
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:47,239
Speaker 4: call like five you know what I mean. Like it

900
00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:49,160
Speaker 4: couldn't have been more opposite. So in my head I

901
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 4: was like, oh, well, I guess this must be love.

902
00:38:52,280 --> 00:38:55,080
Speaker 4: And I like, I mean, I was so and I

903
00:38:55,120 --> 00:38:57,000
Speaker 4: was so into the like we'd always argue in the

904
00:38:57,120 --> 00:38:58,760
Speaker 4: rain and I broke his phone.

905
00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:02,440
Speaker 2: Oh no the rain. Yeah, see, we don't do that. No, no,

906
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:04,200
Speaker 2: whatever we got to talk about, we could do it

907
00:39:04,239 --> 00:39:06,879
Speaker 2: in the house or under some shelter. Like I got

908
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 2: into a quiet argument with my ex boyfriend at the

909
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:13,480
Speaker 2: train uh steps not. We didn't even go.

910
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:13,959
Speaker 1: Down the stairs.

911
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:15,279
Speaker 2: We were at the top of the steps on the

912
00:39:15,280 --> 00:39:18,279
Speaker 2: sidewalk arguing, and people that we knew kept walking by.

913
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 2: Some we had to be like, oh, what are you

914
00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:24,760
Speaker 2: talking about, like like yelling through our teeth.

915
00:39:24,880 --> 00:39:27,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, and hey, Carol.

916
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:28,040
Speaker 2: How your mam gonna doing what she could?

917
00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:30,880
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm gonna kill you. I'm gonna kill you tonight.

918
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 2: So I can't imagine. I mean, it wasn't raining because

919
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:35,399
Speaker 2: I'm black woman.

920
00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 4: It was very like uh, we were not friends. It

921
00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:44,840
Speaker 4: was like purely just this passionate you know, all of

922
00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 4: our I don't know, it was just it was that

923
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:48,160
Speaker 4: was three years, three.

924
00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:48,359
Speaker 3: And a half.

925
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:50,360
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna ask this question again. So who was

926
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,280
Speaker 2: your friends during that time?

927
00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:56,319
Speaker 4: So during that time I did have I in the

928
00:39:56,400 --> 00:40:00,200
Speaker 4: very beginning, I had some friends be like, I know

929
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 4: about this.

930
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,359
Speaker 2: Guy, like he doesn't you have a best friend, because

931
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:05,120
Speaker 2: I feel like the best friend will always let you know, yeah,

932
00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:06,640
Speaker 2: I'm not feeling him, you know.

933
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:10,320
Speaker 4: I had people kind of slowly say it. But again

934
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:15,279
Speaker 4: because I was so I was really depressed the year

935
00:40:15,280 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 4: that I was married and the year leading up to that,

936
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:20,600
Speaker 4: because I knew that I wasn't being myself, Like I

937
00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:23,840
Speaker 4: felt like I was trapped in another body. And so

938
00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:27,759
Speaker 4: because this person was doing all the things that I like.

939
00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:29,680
Speaker 4: My ex husband loved me, but he wasn't like verbal,

940
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:31,240
Speaker 4: you know what I mean, Whereas this new guy would

941
00:40:31,239 --> 00:40:33,720
Speaker 4: just like put me on a pedestal.

942
00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:34,120
Speaker 3: And like compliment.

943
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:36,080
Speaker 1: He was also like kick that pedestal.

944
00:40:36,239 --> 00:40:39,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, absolutely if it got too high, but like kid,

945
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:41,080
Speaker 2: he always humbled you. Yeah.

946
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 4: It was but it was like it was very and

947
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:47,239
Speaker 4: I was eating it up so hard, and it's you know,

948
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:48,760
Speaker 4: I think you put out what you need.

949
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:50,279
Speaker 3: At that time. I needed that at that time.

950
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:52,319
Speaker 4: I also I moved in with him very fast. He

951
00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:53,799
Speaker 4: lived next door to his mom, so I had this

952
00:40:53,840 --> 00:40:54,839
Speaker 4: immigrant mom like.

953
00:40:55,280 --> 00:41:01,759
Speaker 2: You know, dinner, so you was away eating curry, yeah, exactly,

954
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:03,879
Speaker 2: which I have not had since we broke up, because

955
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:04,560
Speaker 2: I'm like, it's like.

956
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,880
Speaker 1: Ah but grateful.

957
00:41:07,160 --> 00:41:09,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, so are you.

958
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 2: When you walk by a halal truck, do you get

959
00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:12,239
Speaker 2: like flashbacks?

960
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:14,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, start twitch all.

961
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,880
Speaker 4: But definitely like First Avenue where all those guys are like,

962
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:18,160
Speaker 4: come in, we have samosas.

963
00:41:18,200 --> 00:41:24,759
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, all your ex ruined Indian food, but.

964
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:25,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's fine.

965
00:41:26,120 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 2: But but yeah, I mean I did.

966
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:29,400
Speaker 3: And then toward the.

967
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:31,560
Speaker 4: The last year that we were together, there was like

968
00:41:31,600 --> 00:41:33,840
Speaker 4: a lot of lying on his behalf, and my friends

969
00:41:33,840 --> 00:41:35,640
Speaker 4: started to be like, okay, come move in with like

970
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:36,960
Speaker 4: they were sort of trying to.

971
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:38,200
Speaker 2: Help facilitate it.

972
00:41:38,239 --> 00:41:40,880
Speaker 4: But the thing with telling your friends to break up

973
00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:44,360
Speaker 4: with people is it's real tricky because again, like you

974
00:41:44,520 --> 00:41:45,879
Speaker 4: got to touch that stove and.

975
00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 5: Burn your hand, right, because you know, because you tell

976
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 5: your friend to leave somebody that you think that or

977
00:41:51,360 --> 00:41:53,399
Speaker 5: you can see that is not a good fit for them,

978
00:41:53,480 --> 00:41:56,439
Speaker 5: and then that person stays with them, and then it's like, well,

979
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:57,520
Speaker 5: I guess we just go.

980
00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:01,480
Speaker 2: It's gonna be awkward, as up yesterday, it's gonna be awkward.

981
00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:03,840
Speaker 2: And then I know that I don't like him, So

982
00:42:03,960 --> 00:42:06,840
Speaker 2: now I gotta sit at lunch or dinner or whatever

983
00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:09,440
Speaker 2: from him. And he knowed that I don't like him

984
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:12,000
Speaker 2: because she didn't ran her mouth and told him how

985
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 2: I feel. So now it's awkward. Now I can't go

986
00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:18,600
Speaker 2: to this restaurant because because he there, Like, but I

987
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:22,120
Speaker 2: love it. I love what is it? What's my favorite thing?

988
00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:23,120
Speaker 2: Drunken noodles? I love?

989
00:42:24,239 --> 00:42:26,320
Speaker 1: Now he didn't fuck up drunken noodles for them exactly.

990
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:27,839
Speaker 3: I mean, I think you can.

991
00:42:28,040 --> 00:42:31,480
Speaker 4: I what I would have, what I worked best with

992
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:32,960
Speaker 4: me at that time, and what I try to do

993
00:42:33,040 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 4: with friends when they're in similar situations is like you listen,

994
00:42:36,760 --> 00:42:39,000
Speaker 4: you say, you know, like I support whatever you do,

995
00:42:39,239 --> 00:42:40,759
Speaker 4: but you know, I just care about you and I

996
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:43,040
Speaker 4: want to like you have to kind of you can

997
00:42:43,080 --> 00:42:43,839
Speaker 4: be upfront.

998
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:44,200
Speaker 3: And honest with them.

999
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:47,160
Speaker 4: Every relationship is different the same way every romantic relationship

1000
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:49,239
Speaker 4: is different. Every friendship is different. You have some friends

1001
00:42:49,239 --> 00:42:51,200
Speaker 4: where you can just say it and it's cool. Other

1002
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:55,000
Speaker 4: friends you can't. It's tricky, Like, but it's also not

1003
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:57,359
Speaker 4: my friend's responsibility to get me out of a relationship.

1004
00:42:57,400 --> 00:42:58,520
Speaker 1: I have to learn what is.

1005
00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:01,719
Speaker 2: Your friend's responsibility to be like a good friend. Yeah,

1006
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:04,239
Speaker 2: like this is not the cist. We're not doing this.

1007
00:43:04,440 --> 00:43:06,640
Speaker 3: So it wasn't telling them everything that was wrong.

1008
00:43:06,880 --> 00:43:09,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, but they still were like, dude, like based on

1009
00:43:09,400 --> 00:43:10,319
Speaker 2: what they were seeing, they were like.

1010
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:11,600
Speaker 1: You should come and stay with me.

1011
00:43:11,760 --> 00:43:11,960
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1012
00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:13,600
Speaker 4: Towards the end, when I started to be more upfront

1013
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:15,279
Speaker 4: about like the problems we were having, they were like,

1014
00:43:15,480 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 4: uh so, yeah, we ended up the reason why that

1015
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,959
Speaker 4: the final straw though, Like there's a lot of things

1016
00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 4: that were wrong, but the final straw was that I

1017
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:27,320
Speaker 4: was doing a solo show about my marriage and he

1018
00:43:27,760 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 4: didn't like me putting all my business out there because

1019
00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 4: I talked about like my first hand, like I talked

1020
00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:34,440
Speaker 4: about all those things.

1021
00:43:34,560 --> 00:43:38,080
Speaker 2: I mean, but that's I think that's valid though, Like

1022
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 2: it was.

1023
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:40,359
Speaker 3: A teen age teenage shit.

1024
00:43:40,480 --> 00:43:42,120
Speaker 4: Also, it's not like he met me and I was

1025
00:43:42,160 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 4: like a nurse and then I became a comedian, Like

1026
00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:46,799
Speaker 4: he met me hearing me talk shit on stage and

1027
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:48,240
Speaker 4: was so attracted to it.

1028
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:50,680
Speaker 2: And now he probably was like, ooh it did don't

1029
00:43:50,680 --> 00:43:52,160
Speaker 2: work out. This was gonna say everything.

1030
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:53,880
Speaker 4: I was the first thing out of his mouth when

1031
00:43:53,920 --> 00:43:55,400
Speaker 4: we broke up, was were you going to tell everyone

1032
00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:56,279
Speaker 4: everything I did wrong?

1033
00:43:56,360 --> 00:43:56,520
Speaker 5: Yes?

1034
00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:59,399
Speaker 3: It's like, yeah, that will be a yes.

1035
00:44:00,120 --> 00:44:02,480
Speaker 4: Here's the thing is, in my marriage and in that relationship,

1036
00:44:02,560 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 4: I absolutely know I made mistakes. I would not be

1037
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:07,719
Speaker 4: ashamed if any of those mistakes were out there, because

1038
00:44:07,719 --> 00:44:10,399
Speaker 4: I'll be like, yeah, yeah, I was young, Yeah, sorry

1039
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:10,799
Speaker 4: about that.

1040
00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:14,680
Speaker 2: You know, that's like dating a performer. You're in a

1041
00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:17,520
Speaker 2: comic and you're dating somebody who's a comedian. Even when

1042
00:44:17,560 --> 00:44:19,240
Speaker 2: I meet somebody and they find out I'm a comic,

1043
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:21,120
Speaker 2: they're like, is this gonna go on one of your skits?

1044
00:44:21,200 --> 00:44:24,040
Speaker 2: And I'm like, first of all, I don't do skits?

1045
00:44:24,040 --> 00:44:24,680
Speaker 1: What this is?

1046
00:44:24,920 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 2: And you know, people are afraid that you're going to

1047
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 2: talk about them, so they should stay a live as.

1048
00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:32,959
Speaker 3: Soon as your dick goes, I mean, you signed a waiver.

1049
00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 2: You sure did.

1050
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 3: That is a waiver that is a legally binding contract.

1051
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:38,360
Speaker 1: As soon as you're released, that's the release.

1052
00:44:38,560 --> 00:44:40,360
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1053
00:44:40,719 --> 00:44:42,160
Speaker 1: Wait, how'd you break up with this dude.

1054
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:47,560
Speaker 4: Oh so he uh it was it was not great.

1055
00:44:47,680 --> 00:44:49,200
Speaker 4: It was like he said he had a problem with

1056
00:44:49,239 --> 00:44:52,960
Speaker 4: the show. Blah blah blah. We argued, had another argument,

1057
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,440
Speaker 4: and then I was like, I like, I can't do this.

1058
00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:56,000
Speaker 3: I'm leaving.

1059
00:44:56,239 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 4: I tried to break up with them a few times

1060
00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 4: over that past year because things were going south, and

1061
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:04,080
Speaker 4: he would, you know, beg and be like, I'm going

1062
00:45:04,120 --> 00:45:06,279
Speaker 4: to therapy. I'll die without you, like a lot of

1063
00:45:06,280 --> 00:45:08,280
Speaker 4: that guilt mother's curry.

1064
00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:08,840
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1065
00:45:09,000 --> 00:45:11,840
Speaker 3: He did a lot of victim stuff.

1066
00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:14,320
Speaker 4: And because but here's the thing is, I was so

1067
00:45:14,320 --> 00:45:16,799
Speaker 4: so talking about rebounds to get into that expert thing.

1068
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:17,480
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna tell.

1069
00:45:17,560 --> 00:45:19,799
Speaker 4: And you know, everyone does whatever they want to do,

1070
00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:23,480
Speaker 4: but I will suggest, like, you gotta give yourself some time.

1071
00:45:23,520 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 4: Like I was in an eight year relationship, I gave

1072
00:45:25,560 --> 00:45:26,560
Speaker 4: myself zero time.

1073
00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:27,279
Speaker 1: I did not want to.

1074
00:45:27,960 --> 00:45:29,720
Speaker 4: I didn't want it because I felt like I didn't

1075
00:45:29,760 --> 00:45:30,359
Speaker 4: deserve to.

1076
00:45:30,320 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 2: Grieve because I vagina has some mourn yeah for a

1077
00:45:33,560 --> 00:45:34,560
Speaker 2: little yeah.

1078
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:35,719
Speaker 1: A little little black veil.

1079
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,279
Speaker 4: And because I initiated the breakup, I felt like, because

1080
00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:41,120
Speaker 4: I was the bad guy, I felt like I didn't

1081
00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:42,080
Speaker 4: deserve times to grieve.

1082
00:45:42,120 --> 00:45:43,920
Speaker 2: So wait wait, wait, wait wait, if you break up,

1083
00:45:43,960 --> 00:45:45,080
Speaker 2: wasn't going to you to bad guy?

1084
00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:47,400
Speaker 4: No felt I don't think that at all. Oh I

1085
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:50,319
Speaker 4: I I'm saying. At the time, I felt like I

1086
00:45:50,360 --> 00:45:52,440
Speaker 4: just felt like the bad guy. I felt really fucked up.

1087
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:55,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I don't feel I mean when I

1088
00:45:55,160 --> 00:45:58,360
Speaker 2: broke up with my boyfriend, I was the bad guy.

1089
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:01,279
Speaker 2: But I feel like that's sometimes you have to leave

1090
00:46:01,320 --> 00:46:03,720
Speaker 2: the bad guy, or sometimes there's no bad guys.

1091
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,080
Speaker 3: Just we're not good for each other one hundred percent.

1092
00:46:06,120 --> 00:46:06,880
Speaker 2: There's just energy.

1093
00:46:06,920 --> 00:46:07,479
Speaker 3: It's not good.

1094
00:46:07,520 --> 00:46:09,680
Speaker 4: And so when I met that second boyfriend, I was

1095
00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:12,560
Speaker 4: in such a vulnerable place. I just wanted something to

1096
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:15,120
Speaker 4: distract me from myself, which I think a lot of

1097
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:17,920
Speaker 4: people do when they stay stuck in a relationship. You're like,

1098
00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:20,160
Speaker 4: well if I put in, especially because he seemed more

1099
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:22,319
Speaker 4: fucked up than me, I was like, well great. The

1100
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:24,960
Speaker 4: same way I was my ex husband's project, this guy

1101
00:46:25,000 --> 00:46:27,279
Speaker 4: will be my project, and I just wanted to Like

1102
00:46:27,640 --> 00:46:29,600
Speaker 4: so when he would come to me crying, being like

1103
00:46:29,640 --> 00:46:31,479
Speaker 4: I can't live without you, I'd be like, I guess

1104
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,360
Speaker 4: this is like if I see.

1105
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:35,920
Speaker 2: A man cry and say I can't live without you. No,

1106
00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:38,520
Speaker 2: I definitely I'm backing my thing. Yeah, I'm putting a

1107
00:46:38,520 --> 00:46:41,440
Speaker 2: different wig on. I'm changing my life. I'm changing my

1108
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:44,560
Speaker 2: first name because those guys, why would you say I

1109
00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:46,560
Speaker 2: can't live with that? Come on, dude, you were living

1110
00:46:47,040 --> 00:46:49,719
Speaker 2: I don't know, thirty years previous to me without me.

1111
00:46:50,200 --> 00:46:52,080
Speaker 3: I agree with everything that is, Beau.

1112
00:46:52,120 --> 00:46:56,399
Speaker 2: If I see a man cry, then pussy is dry,

1113
00:46:54,480 --> 00:47:01,520
Speaker 2: haven't yeh? Man, man tears like sham while my va giant.

1114
00:47:01,600 --> 00:47:06,000
Speaker 2: It's just like it depends. Layers are about No, they're

1115
00:47:06,040 --> 00:47:09,480
Speaker 2: always making me dry. How about you crying during this

1116
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:10,640
Speaker 2: movie about Really?

1117
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:13,400
Speaker 1: I don't mind's funeral?

1118
00:47:13,520 --> 00:47:16,640
Speaker 2: I'm like, wow, live you square, live you skirt up? Man?

1119
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:17,359
Speaker 2: What's going on?

1120
00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:22,399
Speaker 1: But that's just me and that's probably why we're rude. Yeah,

1121
00:47:23,560 --> 00:47:26,680
Speaker 1: so so let me see how mu champy oft I

1122
00:47:26,680 --> 00:47:27,279
Speaker 1: just don't want to see.

1123
00:47:27,440 --> 00:47:30,080
Speaker 2: So can you give anybody who's listening, like tips on

1124
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:32,880
Speaker 2: how to properly rebound or like?

1125
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 4: Okay, so I think I did it properly after that one.

1126
00:47:36,840 --> 00:47:38,279
Speaker 4: So now I'm like single for the first time in

1127
00:47:38,400 --> 00:47:42,080
Speaker 4: eleven years, and I move in with.

1128
00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:44,280
Speaker 3: A girlfriend who's also recently single.

1129
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:44,719
Speaker 2: Good.

1130
00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:47,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, you've got to stick together. In Williamsburg. So I

1131
00:47:47,680 --> 00:47:48,720
Speaker 4: moving to a young, hot.

1132
00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:51,040
Speaker 3: Neighborhood, okay with the thriving.

1133
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:56,080
Speaker 4: Thriving and just start fucking and just started going up

1134
00:47:56,080 --> 00:47:57,560
Speaker 4: to people that I'd always wanted to have, you know,

1135
00:47:57,600 --> 00:47:58,680
Speaker 4: like people you kind of keep in the back of

1136
00:47:58,719 --> 00:47:59,879
Speaker 4: your head and you're like, oh, I was sang.

1137
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:01,680
Speaker 3: Just started going up to all them.

1138
00:48:01,680 --> 00:48:03,759
Speaker 4: It's really I will say, it's a lot easier because

1139
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 4: I'm a comedian.

1140
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:07,040
Speaker 3: So it was like people I knew and I was.

1141
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:10,680
Speaker 2: Wait, was it civilians or you would like comedians and

1142
00:48:10,960 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 2: civilians comedian? Oh, it's fine. Your current boyfriend is a comedian,

1143
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:19,960
Speaker 2: so it's fine.

1144
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, and we worked out.

1145
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:22,799
Speaker 4: Yeah. I was going up to people that I like

1146
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,640
Speaker 4: that I knew a lot of them were like friends,

1147
00:48:24,680 --> 00:48:26,120
Speaker 4: and I was like, I've always wanted to have sex

1148
00:48:26,160 --> 00:48:28,000
Speaker 4: with you, and they were like what And I.

1149
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:28,480
Speaker 3: Was like I was.

1150
00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:31,480
Speaker 4: They're like, what's the catch, and I'm like literally literally

1151
00:48:31,560 --> 00:48:34,160
Speaker 4: just no, Like I have so much time to make

1152
00:48:34,239 --> 00:48:36,200
Speaker 4: up for I need to get my numbers up fast,

1153
00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:38,799
Speaker 4: Like I know, I fall in love easy, so like

1154
00:48:38,920 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 4: let's get so. I guess the trick to it is

1155
00:48:42,800 --> 00:48:44,600
Speaker 4: to just I just was being honest, like I was

1156
00:48:44,640 --> 00:48:47,080
Speaker 4: being like brutally honest with people. I was just like,

1157
00:48:47,560 --> 00:48:49,680
Speaker 4: this is where I'm at. I just got a relationship.

1158
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:53,640
Speaker 4: Like I anything, any advice that I'd ever been given

1159
00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:55,840
Speaker 4: in like a fucking magazine or a TV show, I

1160
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,360
Speaker 4: was just like, fuck that. Like I talked about inappropriate

1161
00:48:58,360 --> 00:49:00,160
Speaker 4: things on first dates.

1162
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:02,640
Speaker 2: So you went on dates, you weren't just going up

1163
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,040
Speaker 2: to people, let's fuck, you wouldn't getting were you getting like.

1164
00:49:05,040 --> 00:49:07,080
Speaker 1: At least pasta you know.

1165
00:49:07,080 --> 00:49:07,960
Speaker 2: I was mostly.

1166
00:49:09,200 --> 00:49:12,080
Speaker 1: I got like a couple of breakfasts. Okay, so it

1167
00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:13,320
Speaker 1: was after yacht and fucked.

1168
00:49:13,400 --> 00:49:17,040
Speaker 4: Okay, I didn't Okay, I want you, I would say,

1169
00:49:17,040 --> 00:49:19,040
Speaker 4: for like the first six months, it was mostly just

1170
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 4: fucking and like connecting with people. Yeah, just it was

1171
00:49:23,040 --> 00:49:24,880
Speaker 4: really fun and it was interesting. I felt like I

1172
00:49:24,880 --> 00:49:26,680
Speaker 4: was hooking with a lot of people that had also

1173
00:49:26,760 --> 00:49:29,520
Speaker 4: gone through a breakup or were like I was really

1174
00:49:29,600 --> 00:49:32,000
Speaker 4: magnetizing people that were sort of in a similar place

1175
00:49:32,000 --> 00:49:33,759
Speaker 4: of me of like, oh my god, I've always been

1176
00:49:33,760 --> 00:49:35,279
Speaker 4: in long term really and I'm trying this.

1177
00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:36,960
Speaker 2: In the summer because I feel like in the summer

1178
00:49:37,280 --> 00:49:39,839
Speaker 2: that is where yeah go hey, oh yeah.

1179
00:49:39,840 --> 00:49:41,759
Speaker 3: It was May and I was like wearing a like.

1180
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:46,360
Speaker 2: A scrumper that I don't want to magnetize with people

1181
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:48,120
Speaker 2: who are going through the same thing as me. I

1182
00:49:48,120 --> 00:49:50,799
Speaker 2: want you to be going through something completely different. I

1183
00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:53,160
Speaker 2: want you to be like in a different place financially,

1184
00:49:53,280 --> 00:49:55,440
Speaker 2: I want you to keep working in a different field.

1185
00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:57,960
Speaker 2: I want you to maybe not know who your dad is.

1186
00:49:58,000 --> 00:50:00,720
Speaker 2: Like I just I need you to be complete different

1187
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:01,279
Speaker 2: than me.

1188
00:50:01,520 --> 00:50:04,719
Speaker 4: I mean I had all sorts, but because I was

1189
00:50:04,920 --> 00:50:09,080
Speaker 4: very specifically not wanting a boyfriend, I was okay hooking

1190
00:50:09,160 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 4: up with someone who was like going through a lot

1191
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:12,799
Speaker 4: of ship because I'm like, oh, this is just gonna

1192
00:50:12,800 --> 00:50:14,319
Speaker 4: be hooking up and maybe like.

1193
00:50:14,320 --> 00:50:15,000
Speaker 3: A coffee date.

1194
00:50:15,080 --> 00:50:16,240
Speaker 1: I feel like those people who.

1195
00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:17,359
Speaker 2: Are going through a lot of stuff are the ones

1196
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:18,680
Speaker 2: that are gonna call you in the middle of the

1197
00:50:18,800 --> 00:50:20,880
Speaker 2: night like, Hey, I just wanted you to know that,

1198
00:50:21,080 --> 00:50:24,120
Speaker 2: Like it's getting pretty bad on like I don't want.

1199
00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:25,640
Speaker 3: To talk to you, and you just say I don't

1200
00:50:25,640 --> 00:50:26,360
Speaker 3: want to talk.

1201
00:50:27,680 --> 00:50:31,960
Speaker 2: Cold. But if she's ice queen, she doesn't want you

1202
00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:34,040
Speaker 2: to be vocals.

1203
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:36,080
Speaker 1: Feel things, ye speak to me. She wants you to

1204
00:50:36,120 --> 00:50:36,720
Speaker 1: be a stone.

1205
00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:39,239
Speaker 2: I'm afraid that if if I shut somebody who's like

1206
00:50:39,280 --> 00:50:42,160
Speaker 2: a little bit broken, if I shut them down too harshly,

1207
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 2: which is what I'm gonna do. I'm afraid they're gonna

1208
00:50:44,120 --> 00:50:46,840
Speaker 2: be like waiting for me at my mailbox, Like hey, remember,

1209
00:50:46,840 --> 00:50:48,880
Speaker 2: but Marie shuts people down all the time, And nobody's

1210
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:50,960
Speaker 2: waiting at your at your doorstad.

1211
00:50:50,920 --> 00:50:52,319
Speaker 1: You need a key to get into the door.

1212
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:57,640
Speaker 2: None, they be letting anybody come through. Somebody was letting

1213
00:50:57,640 --> 00:51:00,919
Speaker 2: me in a while. I was ringing, buzzing your bell. Yeah,

1214
00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:02,719
Speaker 2: the end of the day, I was coming out of

1215
00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:05,000
Speaker 2: that little area and there was a homeless man sleep

1216
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:05,520
Speaker 2: and I was like.

1217
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 4: Really, somebody really want to do at two am?

1218
00:51:11,120 --> 00:51:11,920
Speaker 3: And now you're.

1219
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 1: Okay, So you need to rebound properly. I think rebound properly.

1220
00:51:18,480 --> 00:51:20,719
Speaker 4: And also, and I hope this makes sense, and I

1221
00:51:20,719 --> 00:51:24,399
Speaker 4: feel like Marie is going to disagree, but just picking

1222
00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:27,759
Speaker 4: up on our vibe. But I also I think being

1223
00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:30,359
Speaker 4: in the moment, and this goes for everything in life

1224
00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:33,120
Speaker 4: is so important. And I think especially with relationships, it's

1225
00:51:33,239 --> 00:51:36,160
Speaker 4: very easy to be with someone and of course naturally,

1226
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 4: like your past ship comes up and then you're already

1227
00:51:38,520 --> 00:51:40,640
Speaker 4: planning the future and you're like and all this stuff,

1228
00:51:40,960 --> 00:51:43,200
Speaker 4: and what I really did when I was rebounding was

1229
00:51:43,200 --> 00:51:44,360
Speaker 4: I was being in the moment.

1230
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:46,719
Speaker 3: So when I was like hooking up with people, I

1231
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:47,400
Speaker 3: was there.

1232
00:51:47,920 --> 00:51:52,680
Speaker 4: I really felt like positive, caring energy for them while

1233
00:51:52,680 --> 00:51:54,440
Speaker 4: we were like I felt like the sex I was

1234
00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:57,279
Speaker 4: having was really connected with a lot of people. And

1235
00:51:57,320 --> 00:51:59,720
Speaker 4: that might sound whatever, but I was in the moment

1236
00:51:59,840 --> 00:52:02,360
Speaker 4: and so it it. My head wasn't like where is

1237
00:52:02,400 --> 00:52:05,920
Speaker 4: this going or like oh and so I felt like

1238
00:52:05,920 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 4: a lot of my exchanges with these people and this

1239
00:52:09,040 --> 00:52:11,279
Speaker 4: is getting like very like woo woo energy. But the

1240
00:52:11,520 --> 00:52:15,040
Speaker 4: energy was like respectful and balanced and nice because I

1241
00:52:15,080 --> 00:52:15,879
Speaker 4: was actually there.

1242
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:18,919
Speaker 2: How old we are these people? They sounded uh yeah,

1243
00:52:18,920 --> 00:52:21,480
Speaker 2: they sound like they might be interesting aged.

1244
00:52:22,040 --> 00:52:23,600
Speaker 3: You know what I'm gonna say is it was better

1245
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:24,799
Speaker 3: and better the younger they were.

1246
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:28,480
Speaker 2: Also, they were just respecting you because you was older

1247
00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:30,800
Speaker 2: than them. Maybe it was respect to elders.

1248
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:32,600
Speaker 3: That's what respect my elders.

1249
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:34,320
Speaker 2: Did they call you miss.

1250
00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:41,560
Speaker 4: Ma'am? They were like, oh, I'm gonna come ma'am, Mama Rozzi,

1251
00:52:45,600 --> 00:52:46,360
Speaker 4: where should.

1252
00:52:46,080 --> 00:52:46,640
Speaker 2: I come up?

1253
00:52:46,719 --> 00:52:46,799
Speaker 4: No?

1254
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:48,799
Speaker 3: But uh yeah, I don't know.

1255
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:51,320
Speaker 4: It was it was a really you know, I'm a

1256
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:53,280
Speaker 4: cry but I would also give myself time.

1257
00:52:53,160 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 3: And like cry my shower.

1258
00:52:55,920 --> 00:52:58,160
Speaker 4: Girl, but I was really good about like having nights

1259
00:52:58,200 --> 00:52:59,839
Speaker 4: where I was like, you know what, any other thing

1260
00:52:59,840 --> 00:53:02,960
Speaker 4: I it suggests too, if you are rebounding and you

1261
00:53:03,000 --> 00:53:06,240
Speaker 4: tend to be codependent and find yourself in relationships easy

1262
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:08,520
Speaker 4: is you also have to kind of learn to self

1263
00:53:08,560 --> 00:53:10,600
Speaker 4: soothe and not run to your friends all the time.

1264
00:53:10,960 --> 00:53:11,839
Speaker 3: Because that was the thing.

1265
00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:15,960
Speaker 4: Was like I would start to feel sad, and instead

1266
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:20,040
Speaker 4: of feeling sad because fine, I would grab the phone

1267
00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:21,759
Speaker 4: and like, I'm not saying you shouldn't call people.

1268
00:53:21,840 --> 00:53:23,480
Speaker 3: Of course, if you're like hitting, you.

1269
00:53:23,600 --> 00:53:25,680
Speaker 2: Don't call them. If your friend is Marie Fasson, don't

1270
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:27,560
Speaker 2: you should be called Fay.

1271
00:53:28,640 --> 00:53:31,760
Speaker 4: It was it was a really thing that I needed

1272
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:33,960
Speaker 4: to learn to make my next relationship good, which is

1273
00:53:34,000 --> 00:53:36,160
Speaker 4: self soothing and being like what do I actually think

1274
00:53:36,160 --> 00:53:38,000
Speaker 4: and what do I actually feel? And some of those

1275
00:53:38,040 --> 00:53:39,960
Speaker 4: times would be like I would just cry for an

1276
00:53:39,960 --> 00:53:41,880
Speaker 4: hour and then I'd dust myself off and go do

1277
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:44,360
Speaker 4: something productive instead of being on the phone with like

1278
00:53:44,600 --> 00:53:46,640
Speaker 4: friend and after friend after friend being like I don't

1279
00:53:46,719 --> 00:53:47,440
Speaker 4: know anything.

1280
00:53:47,520 --> 00:53:50,080
Speaker 2: It's like yes, this, yeah, it's gonna be okay. Yeah

1281
00:53:50,360 --> 00:53:52,120
Speaker 2: you got another call, that's the pizza.

1282
00:53:52,440 --> 00:53:54,080
Speaker 1: Yes, ordered again?

1283
00:53:54,400 --> 00:53:57,239
Speaker 4: Not, but just learning to pick and choose when you

1284
00:53:57,280 --> 00:53:58,919
Speaker 4: actually need help and when you're just.

1285
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:00,680
Speaker 2: Like when do you call your friend? When do you

1286
00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:01,239
Speaker 2: actually call?

1287
00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:03,120
Speaker 3: I think when you need.

1288
00:54:02,960 --> 00:54:03,799
Speaker 2: To stay at her place?

1289
00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:06,640
Speaker 4: No, or when you I mean, god, like, if you're

1290
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:10,279
Speaker 4: feeling fucking suicidal, of course, if you feel if you're

1291
00:54:10,320 --> 00:54:12,320
Speaker 4: like if you have had a realization.

1292
00:54:11,920 --> 00:54:13,160
Speaker 3: And you're like, hey, I want to run this by

1293
00:54:13,239 --> 00:54:14,640
Speaker 3: you and like talk it out.

1294
00:54:14,640 --> 00:54:16,239
Speaker 4: But I think if you're just in that moment of

1295
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:19,520
Speaker 4: panic and you're not even letting yourself be honest with

1296
00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:23,160
Speaker 4: yourself about what it is, because it's sometimes when you're

1297
00:54:23,160 --> 00:54:25,640
Speaker 4: having a fitter breakdown, Like every time I've had a breakdown,

1298
00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:28,600
Speaker 4: I've come out of it with something a new knowledge

1299
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:29,360
Speaker 4: about myself.

1300
00:54:29,400 --> 00:54:31,160
Speaker 3: That hurts, but it's amazing.

1301
00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:34,640
Speaker 2: That's so real. That is I mean, I'm right here,

1302
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:36,520
Speaker 2: think about all the times I've picked up the phone

1303
00:54:36,520 --> 00:54:38,040
Speaker 2: call people like that was dumb.

1304
00:54:38,400 --> 00:54:40,719
Speaker 4: It's not dumb. I mean, I still don't get me wrong.

1305
00:54:40,840 --> 00:54:41,880
Speaker 4: I'm sure I have friends with my.

1306
00:54:41,880 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 1: People listening, and you gotta self suit.

1307
00:54:43,920 --> 00:54:47,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, I have a friend who would hear this and

1308
00:54:47,680 --> 00:54:48,280
Speaker 3: be like bitch.

1309
00:54:52,080 --> 00:54:55,839
Speaker 4: But I'm trying to learn because that's and you'll make

1310
00:54:55,880 --> 00:54:57,359
Speaker 4: better decisions after that.

1311
00:54:57,440 --> 00:55:00,760
Speaker 2: Okay, what's a what's a good like break up line?

1312
00:55:01,000 --> 00:55:03,880
Speaker 2: Not the it's you, it's not me, but like something

1313
00:55:03,920 --> 00:55:04,680
Speaker 2: equivalent to that.

1314
00:55:05,480 --> 00:55:08,120
Speaker 4: Oh, I just think it's it's just being honest. I

1315
00:55:08,160 --> 00:55:11,200
Speaker 4: think trying to make it not. I think that what

1316
00:55:11,320 --> 00:55:14,880
Speaker 4: happens a lot in breakups is people. Even if it

1317
00:55:14,920 --> 00:55:17,880
Speaker 4: is quote unquote the other person's fault, it's never just

1318
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:20,640
Speaker 4: one person's fault because like the person I was with

1319
00:55:20,680 --> 00:55:22,920
Speaker 4: for almost four years, I could right now be like

1320
00:55:22,960 --> 00:55:24,920
Speaker 4: any lied about this and this and this, but you

1321
00:55:24,960 --> 00:55:27,640
Speaker 4: know what I chose to say. I enabled the behavior.

1322
00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:30,759
Speaker 4: I tried to change him. I shamed him when he

1323
00:55:30,800 --> 00:55:32,719
Speaker 4: didn't do what I thought was right. I mean I

1324
00:55:32,760 --> 00:55:34,960
Speaker 4: did a lot. So when I broke up with him,

1325
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:36,360
Speaker 4: he was like, I know I did a lot of

1326
00:55:36,360 --> 00:55:39,680
Speaker 4: things wrong. I was like, yes, but we're it's not

1327
00:55:40,320 --> 00:55:44,160
Speaker 4: you're wrong, I'm wrong. This just isn't right. And I think,

1328
00:55:44,360 --> 00:55:46,839
Speaker 4: you know, someone might not believe that, but I think

1329
00:55:46,880 --> 00:55:50,120
Speaker 4: if you can take ownership of your part in it,

1330
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:52,439
Speaker 4: it makes it easier for you both to heal.

1331
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:55,319
Speaker 2: When I hear this just isn't right, I get like

1332
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:56,520
Speaker 2: I feel crazy.

1333
00:55:56,600 --> 00:55:59,040
Speaker 1: I feel like Nah, we gonna make it work. Let's

1334
00:55:59,080 --> 00:56:00,960
Speaker 1: make it right, to make it.

1335
00:56:01,360 --> 00:56:02,840
Speaker 4: But the thing is that when you get into a

1336
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:05,759
Speaker 4: new relationship, Yeah, but then it's.

1337
00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:12,640
Speaker 2: Right, yeah, what's her name, Iyanda, I'll get her to

1338
00:56:12,760 --> 00:56:15,719
Speaker 2: fix this relationship. Yeah, no, I'm not doing that. If

1339
00:56:15,719 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 2: you're telling me it is no. My My line was yeah,

1340
00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:21,000
Speaker 2: I can't do this anymore. And it was like what

1341
00:56:21,040 --> 00:56:23,600
Speaker 2: do you mean? And then we talked for like I

1342
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:27,200
Speaker 2: feel like two days, and then I left and he

1343
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:29,040
Speaker 2: was like, hey, do you want to go see a play?

1344
00:56:29,200 --> 00:56:32,360
Speaker 2: And I was like I just I left your keys there,

1345
00:56:32,560 --> 00:56:34,879
Speaker 2: Like why would you? Like sometimes you try to break

1346
00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:38,200
Speaker 2: up with somebody and then they're like no, we're just talking.

1347
00:56:38,600 --> 00:56:40,680
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, how do you do with somebody like that?

1348
00:56:40,840 --> 00:56:42,960
Speaker 4: You say, because that's what happened with my last He

1349
00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:44,560
Speaker 4: was like sending me a picture he had a dog,

1350
00:56:44,600 --> 00:56:46,400
Speaker 4: but it like kind of became my dog, you know,

1351
00:56:46,400 --> 00:56:48,000
Speaker 4: and he would send me He's like the dog misses you,

1352
00:56:48,160 --> 00:56:52,000
Speaker 4: or like hey can you And I was like I'm

1353
00:56:52,640 --> 00:56:56,120
Speaker 4: I can't. I can't comfort you through this breakup. That's

1354
00:56:56,160 --> 00:57:03,680
Speaker 4: what's happening. Yeah, that's where the call John and I wanted,

1355
00:57:04,040 --> 00:57:06,960
Speaker 4: you know, I don't like having bad energy with anyone,

1356
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:08,799
Speaker 4: but with that one, I had to be like, he

1357
00:57:08,880 --> 00:57:11,640
Speaker 4: might hate me, but I don't care because I can't.

1358
00:57:11,680 --> 00:57:13,239
Speaker 4: I have to get out of this pattern of like

1359
00:57:14,239 --> 00:57:16,640
Speaker 4: caring what other people think because that also makes you codependent.

1360
00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:19,240
Speaker 2: So wait, how long did it take you to get

1361
00:57:19,240 --> 00:57:21,479
Speaker 2: into a relationship that you're in now? Okay?

1362
00:57:21,600 --> 00:57:23,720
Speaker 4: So I promised myself, and I know it's not gonna

1363
00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:25,680
Speaker 4: sound like a long time, but for me, considering my

1364
00:57:25,680 --> 00:57:27,280
Speaker 4: track record, I was like, I have to be single

1365
00:57:27,320 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 4: and minimum a year. I was like, yeah, I was

1366
00:57:31,320 --> 00:57:33,760
Speaker 4: like minimum. I can like go on dates, I can

1367
00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 4: like hang, but like, I can't be like this is

1368
00:57:35,840 --> 00:57:38,200
Speaker 4: my boyfriend meet my parents for like at least a year?

1369
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:40,160
Speaker 2: Were you any dating apps or anything like that?

1370
00:57:40,440 --> 00:57:42,120
Speaker 4: I join and then like someone would message me and

1371
00:57:42,120 --> 00:57:43,800
Speaker 4: I'd canceled because I was like, well, I'm not looking

1372
00:57:43,880 --> 00:57:44,840
Speaker 4: for I don't.

1373
00:57:44,840 --> 00:57:45,360
Speaker 3: I kind of don't.

1374
00:57:45,360 --> 00:57:46,880
Speaker 4: I would love it if it was longer than a year,

1375
00:57:47,000 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 4: Like I really wanted to explore. So I say around

1376
00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:52,160
Speaker 4: eight months, I started to like, you know, I would

1377
00:57:52,200 --> 00:57:54,440
Speaker 4: go to dinner with someone before we had sex, but

1378
00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:56,320
Speaker 4: I'd always be like sex and like.

1379
00:57:56,920 --> 00:57:59,680
Speaker 1: Again, I'm happy to fails to go.

1380
00:58:01,760 --> 00:58:06,560
Speaker 4: But I know Will, who's my current boyfriend almost exactly

1381
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:07,480
Speaker 4: a year to the day.

1382
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:09,960
Speaker 3: Wow, Yeah, which was really interesting.

1383
00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:12,760
Speaker 2: The universe is line and shift. And we broke up

1384
00:58:12,840 --> 00:58:13,240
Speaker 2: right away.

1385
00:58:13,320 --> 00:58:15,640
Speaker 3: There was like something about his energy where I was like, now.

1386
00:58:15,520 --> 00:58:17,120
Speaker 2: Will don't look like he hooked up right away. He

1387
00:58:17,160 --> 00:58:19,080
Speaker 2: looked like your time he opened the door.

1388
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:23,320
Speaker 4: No, no, no, he is he his talk about his numbers.

1389
00:58:23,400 --> 00:58:31,200
Speaker 4: He is such a whoreror really absolutely not. I have

1390
00:58:31,280 --> 00:58:31,920
Speaker 4: my podcast.

1391
00:58:32,000 --> 00:58:32,520
Speaker 2: He's nice.

1392
00:58:32,640 --> 00:58:35,919
Speaker 3: He's a nice guy. That's probably why he gave I'm

1393
00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:36,720
Speaker 3: his first girlfriend.

1394
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:40,840
Speaker 2: So you're saying he was he didn't hooked up with Mappy,

1395
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:43,880
Speaker 2: but he didn't have a girlfriend girlfriend right, Yeah.

1396
00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:46,120
Speaker 4: He never like he had like people. Well, I'll let

1397
00:58:46,200 --> 00:58:47,960
Speaker 4: him tell his story. This is my podcast.

1398
00:58:48,200 --> 00:58:52,160
Speaker 2: And about his shoulders look like long term. He looks

1399
00:58:52,200 --> 00:58:54,760
Speaker 2: like a long term Well that.

1400
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:57,080
Speaker 4: Was the thing because when I first when I first

1401
00:58:57,080 --> 00:58:59,000
Speaker 4: saw him perform, he would do all these jokes about

1402
00:58:59,040 --> 00:59:02,080
Speaker 4: rom coms and like not getting the girl, and so

1403
00:59:02,200 --> 00:59:05,280
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, he's like a and that's also

1404
00:59:05,320 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 4: why like he was flirting and I was like, I

1405
00:59:07,240 --> 00:59:09,000
Speaker 4: feel like if we start hanging out, it could go

1406
00:59:09,120 --> 00:59:09,600
Speaker 4: long term.

1407
00:59:09,640 --> 00:59:13,200
Speaker 2: And I didn't want that, so you friend zoned him

1408
00:59:13,200 --> 00:59:15,320
Speaker 2: for a little bit. I did, and then we like

1409
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:17,560
Speaker 2: but you were like, let's get this dollar pizza real quick.

1410
00:59:18,080 --> 00:59:22,120
Speaker 1: No, Emily's were wherever.

1411
00:59:22,320 --> 00:59:25,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, we just had like a slow like we like

1412
00:59:25,600 --> 00:59:26,520
Speaker 3: we're at you know, a show.

1413
00:59:26,560 --> 00:59:28,240
Speaker 4: We ended up like dancing all night after the show

1414
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:29,920
Speaker 4: after everyone left, and then I was like bye, and

1415
00:59:29,920 --> 00:59:31,040
Speaker 4: he walked me into the train.

1416
00:59:31,040 --> 00:59:34,080
Speaker 2: It was like, very well, he practiced his dance moves

1417
00:59:34,120 --> 00:59:43,080
Speaker 2: before he hung out like a hitch you remember. Very sweet?

1418
00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:45,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, Will is a nice guy.

1419
00:59:45,120 --> 00:59:45,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, so sweet.

1420
00:59:46,000 --> 00:59:47,200
Speaker 1: And how long have y'all been together?

1421
00:59:47,320 --> 00:59:47,520
Speaker 4: Three?

1422
00:59:47,560 --> 00:59:49,640
Speaker 3: We just just three years, like a creer mark.

1423
00:59:49,840 --> 00:59:51,560
Speaker 4: And it was but I will say this so this

1424
00:59:51,600 --> 00:59:54,240
Speaker 4: would be my other advice was with him, it was

1425
00:59:54,320 --> 00:59:57,960
Speaker 4: like beyond honesty from the get like we named every

1426
00:59:57,960 --> 01:00:00,439
Speaker 4: comedian we had ever fucked, like the like the third

1427
01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:01,400
Speaker 4: night we hung out, just.

1428
01:00:01,840 --> 01:00:02,240
Speaker 2: Get it out.

1429
01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:05,600
Speaker 3: They're fine and.

1430
01:00:08,280 --> 01:00:09,640
Speaker 2: That means more than five.

1431
01:00:11,120 --> 01:00:13,160
Speaker 4: Just because I don't want him to be able to

1432
01:00:13,160 --> 01:00:15,160
Speaker 4: show talking to someone that I hooked up with and

1433
01:00:15,200 --> 01:00:16,680
Speaker 4: have that other person be like I know.

1434
01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:19,320
Speaker 3: A secret and like no Will knows and.

1435
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:21,120
Speaker 2: We'll find with it because we do have to because

1436
01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:22,680
Speaker 2: comedians running fucking mouth.

1437
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:24,200
Speaker 1: They don't know how to keep secrets.

1438
01:00:24,280 --> 01:00:26,760
Speaker 2: No, they tell all their business. Yeah, I mean it

1439
01:00:26,800 --> 01:00:29,120
Speaker 2: goes back to dating somebody dating a comic and them

1440
01:00:29,120 --> 01:00:31,280
Speaker 2: talking about Listen. I feel like if if you fuck

1441
01:00:31,320 --> 01:00:33,080
Speaker 2: a comic and you a comic, there should be like

1442
01:00:33,080 --> 01:00:35,120
Speaker 2: an NDR or I mean you gotta sign like no,

1443
01:00:35,200 --> 01:00:38,360
Speaker 2: you can't mention this shit because like, don't be using

1444
01:00:38,440 --> 01:00:41,040
Speaker 2: me as your material like in vice versus. That's why

1445
01:00:41,080 --> 01:00:43,680
Speaker 2: I don't bank comedians. I mean that's really that's not

1446
01:00:43,720 --> 01:00:46,200
Speaker 2: even why I just don't bank comedians because I don't. Again,

1447
01:00:46,240 --> 01:00:48,480
Speaker 2: it goes back to not wanting to anything that's too

1448
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:51,920
Speaker 2: similar to me, but it's working for you, and I

1449
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:54,680
Speaker 2: love and I approve of him. If you were the

1450
01:00:54,760 --> 01:00:56,160
Speaker 2: data comedian, he's one of them.

1451
01:00:56,800 --> 01:00:59,200
Speaker 4: The thing is we have similar Okay, we have like

1452
01:00:59,280 --> 01:01:01,280
Speaker 4: similar I think hearts and.

1453
01:01:02,720 --> 01:01:03,840
Speaker 2: Oh you seen his heart before?

1454
01:01:04,240 --> 01:01:05,560
Speaker 4: No, but you know what I'm saying, Like we have

1455
01:01:05,640 --> 01:01:09,520
Speaker 4: like similar I think we have similar mentalities about how

1456
01:01:09,560 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 4: one should behave and morals and beliefs, but we're very

1457
01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:16,640
Speaker 4: different as far as like like he likes quiet, I

1458
01:01:16,720 --> 01:01:19,000
Speaker 4: talk a lot. He is a night person. I'm a

1459
01:01:19,040 --> 01:01:22,200
Speaker 4: morning like we really kind of balancing. Yeah, that's why

1460
01:01:22,240 --> 01:01:22,959
Speaker 4: I like showed up.

1461
01:01:25,440 --> 01:01:27,120
Speaker 1: And she walked from her house.

1462
01:01:29,000 --> 01:01:30,919
Speaker 2: You made me look bad. You look like the bad

1463
01:01:30,960 --> 01:01:32,120
Speaker 2: house you were here before me.

1464
01:01:33,200 --> 01:01:36,840
Speaker 4: But yeah, I know, it's uh, it's just I think

1465
01:01:36,880 --> 01:01:39,960
Speaker 4: what works for us. And you know, very early on,

1466
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:41,720
Speaker 4: I was like, I'm not gonna I'm not jumping too

1467
01:01:41,720 --> 01:01:44,760
Speaker 4: far ahead. I'm not like I can't, I can't imagine.

1468
01:01:44,800 --> 01:01:49,919
Speaker 1: It's not it seems like that's what works for you.

1469
01:01:50,480 --> 01:01:53,440
Speaker 2: Not overthinking or for anybody really is just like being

1470
01:01:53,480 --> 01:01:55,560
Speaker 2: in the moment and then doing it until you don't

1471
01:01:55,560 --> 01:01:56,200
Speaker 2: want to do it anymore.

1472
01:01:56,280 --> 01:01:58,760
Speaker 4: And something I would also really advise people because this

1473
01:01:58,840 --> 01:02:01,640
Speaker 4: is something I learned from like the breakups and whatever is.

1474
01:02:02,520 --> 01:02:04,600
Speaker 4: And it goes back to reaching out to friends, like

1475
01:02:05,040 --> 01:02:08,520
Speaker 4: with him most things. Every now and then I'll talk

1476
01:02:08,560 --> 01:02:10,760
Speaker 4: to a friend about him, but it's nothing that if.

1477
01:02:10,640 --> 01:02:13,280
Speaker 3: He heard would be scandalous, you know what I mean.

1478
01:02:13,840 --> 01:02:16,480
Speaker 4: But even we were starting our courtship, I didn't ask

1479
01:02:16,560 --> 01:02:18,520
Speaker 4: friends what they thought of him worship.

1480
01:02:18,720 --> 01:02:20,640
Speaker 1: I didn't yeah wow.

1481
01:02:20,520 --> 01:02:22,800
Speaker 4: But I didn't even like, I didn't ask my friends

1482
01:02:22,800 --> 01:02:23,400
Speaker 4: what they thought.

1483
01:02:23,480 --> 01:02:25,240
Speaker 3: I wasn't like, I don't know, should I text him?

1484
01:02:25,360 --> 01:02:26,480
Speaker 3: I didn't everything.

1485
01:02:26,560 --> 01:02:29,800
Speaker 4: I went to him, like, I asked him for advice

1486
01:02:29,880 --> 01:02:33,439
Speaker 4: about our relationship, and that to me was a very

1487
01:02:33,560 --> 01:02:35,280
Speaker 4: huge sign because I feel like when you have a

1488
01:02:35,320 --> 01:02:36,959
Speaker 4: friend that's like, how do I respond to this guy?

1489
01:02:37,040 --> 01:02:39,480
Speaker 4: You're like, well, if you don't know how to respond

1490
01:02:39,520 --> 01:02:42,240
Speaker 4: to a girl or whatever, what are you?

1491
01:02:42,520 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 2: I'm like, bitch you thirty five if you don't know

1492
01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:46,400
Speaker 2: about now, like, come on, girl, you don't need me

1493
01:02:46,480 --> 01:02:48,880
Speaker 2: to help you. And then I'll be like, well, right, yeah,

1494
01:02:49,120 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 2: with the emergency here, and then yeah, tota egg plant

1495
01:02:55,200 --> 01:02:57,400
Speaker 2: in there too, Yeah you might as well you didn't

1496
01:02:57,400 --> 01:03:02,240
Speaker 2: fuck him, right. I'll screenshot conversations and send them to

1497
01:03:02,280 --> 01:03:04,840
Speaker 2: my friend, but I already know what i'm gonna say. Yeah, yeah,

1498
01:03:04,960 --> 01:03:06,320
Speaker 2: I don't feel like and then if they tell me

1499
01:03:06,360 --> 01:03:08,120
Speaker 2: to put something, I'm like yay, and then I just

1500
01:03:08,160 --> 01:03:08,960
Speaker 2: put the opposite.

1501
01:03:09,040 --> 01:03:10,680
Speaker 4: I just think if you're asked, if you're talking to

1502
01:03:10,680 --> 01:03:13,800
Speaker 4: your friends more than you're talking to your partner about

1503
01:03:13,840 --> 01:03:16,520
Speaker 4: the relationship friends, then that's that's a sign.

1504
01:03:17,080 --> 01:03:19,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, but sometimes you gotta do that because your friend

1505
01:03:19,040 --> 01:03:23,920
Speaker 2: is vicariously living through you. So just make sure I'm entertained.

1506
01:03:24,080 --> 01:03:27,800
Speaker 2: So please, weird, what are you talking about send it

1507
01:03:27,880 --> 01:03:30,840
Speaker 2: my way please, I mean, Marie, don't hold it, don't

1508
01:03:30,840 --> 01:03:33,760
Speaker 2: hold back. Okay, Well I'm okay, So I'm gonna I

1509
01:03:34,160 --> 01:03:36,760
Speaker 2: was in a relationship for three years and now I've

1510
01:03:36,760 --> 01:03:40,600
Speaker 2: been single for three years, and so I'm getting back

1511
01:03:40,680 --> 01:03:45,080
Speaker 2: into the dating world. I'm saying that, but I'm probably

1512
01:03:45,120 --> 01:03:47,480
Speaker 2: not going to But like i'm, I'm, I'm I've never

1513
01:03:47,520 --> 01:03:49,680
Speaker 2: been on any of the apps. I've never done any like,

1514
01:03:50,160 --> 01:03:52,760
Speaker 2: I'm definitely not gonna bang a comedian, so like, where

1515
01:03:53,440 --> 01:03:55,479
Speaker 2: where should I be looking for my rebound on.

1516
01:03:55,400 --> 01:03:59,880
Speaker 4: The Q train? So I'm gonna say, don't say. I

1517
01:04:00,160 --> 01:04:02,440
Speaker 4: definitely not gonna about anyone.

1518
01:04:02,560 --> 01:04:04,280
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, you know I'm talking about I'm taking back.

1519
01:04:04,280 --> 01:04:05,680
Speaker 2: I'm not not going to date a comedian in New

1520
01:04:05,760 --> 01:04:11,960
Speaker 2: York who makes less money than Okay, friend, I approve,

1521
01:04:12,280 --> 01:04:14,240
Speaker 2: I approve of whatever you said. You want to be

1522
01:04:14,320 --> 01:04:17,480
Speaker 2: like a different level comedian than yes, and and Sydney

1523
01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:20,520
Speaker 2: has to uh sign off on that, and I sign off.

1524
01:04:21,320 --> 01:04:23,520
Speaker 2: I didn't put my whole signature and that mention.

1525
01:04:25,000 --> 01:04:27,720
Speaker 1: Sent it out is already she's the witness.

1526
01:04:28,440 --> 01:04:31,680
Speaker 4: Okay, So but I don't know where you maybe she's

1527
01:04:31,680 --> 01:04:36,640
Speaker 4: like I don't even know you're doomed. No, wow, No,

1528
01:04:36,800 --> 01:04:39,920
Speaker 4: but like ask I mean friends to introduce you to people.

1529
01:04:40,920 --> 01:04:42,360
Speaker 3: Okay, that's one thing.

1530
01:04:42,640 --> 01:04:44,760
Speaker 2: Well it's just me. So I don't have nobody for her.

1531
01:04:44,840 --> 01:04:46,520
Speaker 1: So Sept. One is get some new friends.

1532
01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:47,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get some new friends.

1533
01:04:48,000 --> 01:04:49,800
Speaker 4: Anyone listening to this podcast, if you know someone who

1534
01:04:49,800 --> 01:04:52,480
Speaker 4: you think would be a great match for Marae, why not?

1535
01:04:52,760 --> 01:04:57,160
Speaker 1: Oh girl? Or don't even need no, don't feed into

1536
01:04:57,200 --> 01:04:57,720
Speaker 1: this bullshit.

1537
01:04:57,800 --> 01:05:00,080
Speaker 2: Look at her. She don't need no damn help. You

1538
01:05:00,120 --> 01:05:00,840
Speaker 2: don't need her friends.

1539
01:05:00,880 --> 01:05:02,600
Speaker 1: I mean my phone is full of dis.

1540
01:05:02,560 --> 01:05:03,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, she walks out.

1541
01:05:03,600 --> 01:05:06,600
Speaker 4: She's great, But but that's different than meeting someone who's

1542
01:05:06,600 --> 01:05:09,080
Speaker 4: actually a good match. Like, yes, she's gorgeous, she's getting

1543
01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:12,760
Speaker 4: dick pics. But if you're actually interested in meeting someone,

1544
01:05:12,840 --> 01:05:15,240
Speaker 4: you can have a conversation and be yourself with that's

1545
01:05:15,240 --> 01:05:15,760
Speaker 4: what you said.

1546
01:05:15,800 --> 01:05:19,720
Speaker 2: You ain't all that, Marie's you ain't on it. Listen,

1547
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:22,400
Speaker 2: we're gonna talk off the podcast because Sidney's not gonna

1548
01:05:22,440 --> 01:05:26,400
Speaker 2: let us be great. Julia, I feel like, is there

1549
01:05:26,480 --> 01:05:30,640
Speaker 2: anything you want to leave people listening with about either

1550
01:05:30,720 --> 01:05:34,520
Speaker 2: relationships or or rushing into things or taking their time

1551
01:05:34,840 --> 01:05:36,480
Speaker 2: with Well, I was going to quiz her just a

1552
01:05:36,520 --> 01:05:38,880
Speaker 2: little bit, right, Okay, So well, listen to the question

1553
01:05:38,920 --> 01:05:40,560
Speaker 2: that I doesn't yes, and then well you want to.

1554
01:05:40,600 --> 01:05:42,560
Speaker 4: Quiz and then and then if there's anything I didn't

1555
01:05:42,560 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 4: answer in the quiz, but let's do that.

1556
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:46,320
Speaker 3: Sorry, I just go ahead control your podcast.

1557
01:05:46,480 --> 01:05:51,040
Speaker 2: Okay, thank you? How you mediate that? So, Julia, we've

1558
01:05:51,040 --> 01:05:54,960
Speaker 2: been together for about four years. You know, I'm all

1559
01:05:55,040 --> 01:05:58,120
Speaker 2: right as a partner, not the best. I'm all right,

1560
01:05:58,240 --> 01:06:00,120
Speaker 2: I'm I can already get you and your girlfriend you're

1561
01:06:00,120 --> 01:06:03,160
Speaker 2: talking about now, you talk about you and her quiz

1562
01:06:03,240 --> 01:06:04,520
Speaker 2: right here? Right?

1563
01:06:05,600 --> 01:06:08,600
Speaker 1: You know you and your girlfriend. She already knows that

1564
01:06:08,600 --> 01:06:09,160
Speaker 1: you're all right.

1565
01:06:12,640 --> 01:06:19,320
Speaker 2: Get in, get in the zone. Okay. Sorry, So we've

1566
01:06:19,360 --> 01:06:24,320
Speaker 2: been together. I've I'm all right. My career is okay.

1567
01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:27,000
Speaker 2: So that means I have no money in the bank.

1568
01:06:27,320 --> 01:06:31,120
Speaker 2: But I hate you with a ring. Do you say

1569
01:06:31,160 --> 01:06:33,080
Speaker 2: yes or no? Four years?

1570
01:06:33,120 --> 01:06:36,160
Speaker 4: I mean together? This is I need a lot more

1571
01:06:36,160 --> 01:06:38,000
Speaker 4: information here.

1572
01:06:38,040 --> 01:06:40,040
Speaker 1: You're in love with me? But like, but do you

1573
01:06:40,160 --> 01:06:42,120
Speaker 1: have like goals?

1574
01:06:42,200 --> 01:06:43,280
Speaker 3: And do you have are you.

1575
01:06:43,280 --> 01:06:46,880
Speaker 4: Like yeah, I'm a comedian, but are you like are

1576
01:06:46,880 --> 01:06:49,720
Speaker 4: you like a victim? And like nothing works out for you?

1577
01:06:49,720 --> 01:06:51,240
Speaker 4: That's why you're broken. Nothing's happening.

1578
01:06:51,280 --> 01:06:54,880
Speaker 1: Are you like actually leaving how to save money? Buffalo

1579
01:06:54,960 --> 01:06:58,120
Speaker 1: exchange stake stuff at the through shag.

1580
01:06:58,480 --> 01:07:01,720
Speaker 2: No, No, even though you're in love with me and

1581
01:07:01,840 --> 01:07:04,440
Speaker 2: that my career is promising, I mean, I haven't booked

1582
01:07:04,440 --> 01:07:05,080
Speaker 2: anything yet.

1583
01:07:05,520 --> 01:07:09,800
Speaker 4: It's just no, I need no because if I have

1584
01:07:09,840 --> 01:07:14,720
Speaker 4: to carry your like self pity, like that's gonna make

1585
01:07:14,720 --> 01:07:15,439
Speaker 4: my pussy dry.

1586
01:07:16,680 --> 01:07:20,920
Speaker 2: But for my own mind, you know what, my pussy

1587
01:07:21,040 --> 01:07:27,040
Speaker 2: is wet, right Yo, that's beautiful.

1588
01:07:27,120 --> 01:07:28,840
Speaker 4: Well, I mean, but you're but you're the things you

1589
01:07:28,880 --> 01:07:31,320
Speaker 4: gave me to work with. We're not very sid that.

1590
01:07:31,360 --> 01:07:33,760
Speaker 4: She was like, you love me? What are your positive qualities?

1591
01:07:33,840 --> 01:07:36,840
Speaker 2: You love me? Me love It's hard to find fun

1592
01:07:37,040 --> 01:07:40,480
Speaker 2: and I find you working on real fast my legs,

1593
01:07:40,880 --> 01:07:43,720
Speaker 2: my calves, my cast I love your calves. Thank you.

1594
01:07:43,920 --> 01:07:49,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, get a job, Julian, I was just laid off.

1595
01:07:49,840 --> 01:07:53,320
Speaker 4: So like, honestly, I'm doing the past at twelve thirty

1596
01:07:53,320 --> 01:07:54,080
Speaker 4: on a Monday.

1597
01:07:54,400 --> 01:07:56,640
Speaker 2: So yes, guess what you're doing it in my pre

1598
01:07:56,720 --> 01:08:01,200
Speaker 2: war apartment. Okay, So I have a question for you.

1599
01:08:03,480 --> 01:08:05,800
Speaker 2: So you said that when you would go on dates

1600
01:08:05,800 --> 01:08:08,360
Speaker 2: with people, like nothing was off limits, like you broke

1601
01:08:08,400 --> 01:08:10,800
Speaker 2: all the dating rules that the magazines till yeah yeah,

1602
01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:14,440
Speaker 2: So what what is something that is like one hundred

1603
01:08:14,440 --> 01:08:18,600
Speaker 2: percent of the time always off limits to talk about nothing? Wow?

1604
01:08:18,920 --> 01:08:21,120
Speaker 2: I just feel like because you're okay, here's the thing.

1605
01:08:21,439 --> 01:08:26,439
Speaker 4: If you go on a date and you are, i know,

1606
01:08:26,520 --> 01:08:28,639
Speaker 4: be yourself as such a generic thing, and it's also

1607
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:30,000
Speaker 4: a really hard thing because you're like, well, how do

1608
01:08:30,040 --> 01:08:30,559
Speaker 4: I know who I am?

1609
01:08:30,640 --> 01:08:31,880
Speaker 3: And the thing is, sometimes you learn.

1610
01:08:31,800 --> 01:08:34,000
Speaker 4: Who you are in a relationship, like when you're in

1611
01:08:34,000 --> 01:08:36,120
Speaker 4: a bad rely, Like a relationship is like a mirror,

1612
01:08:36,160 --> 01:08:39,080
Speaker 4: so it's all relative. Right, So you go on a date,

1613
01:08:39,640 --> 01:08:43,759
Speaker 4: you act like yourself, you like someone who reads an article,

1614
01:08:43,760 --> 01:08:46,120
Speaker 4: and it's like, don't say this, act like this straight

1615
01:08:46,240 --> 01:08:48,439
Speaker 4: Like when fucking millionaire matchmaker would tell people with curly

1616
01:08:48,479 --> 01:08:50,880
Speaker 4: hair to straighten their hair. I'm like, once that girl

1617
01:08:50,880 --> 01:08:52,400
Speaker 4: puts out of the shower, he's going to realize her

1618
01:08:52,400 --> 01:08:53,000
Speaker 4: hair is curly.

1619
01:08:53,160 --> 01:08:55,960
Speaker 1: Like why millionaire hair matchmaker is single too.

1620
01:08:56,040 --> 01:08:58,479
Speaker 4: So that's what I'm saying, Like there's all this shit

1621
01:08:58,520 --> 01:09:00,960
Speaker 4: where it's like do this, don't do that. The truth

1622
01:09:01,040 --> 01:09:03,760
Speaker 4: is if you guys start dating, that real you is

1623
01:09:03,800 --> 01:09:07,320
Speaker 4: gonna come out. So why hide it when you first

1624
01:09:07,400 --> 01:09:09,240
Speaker 4: meet Because that's the thing that there's going to make

1625
01:09:09,240 --> 01:09:13,160
Speaker 4: them love you like your your weird flaws.

1626
01:09:13,400 --> 01:09:15,439
Speaker 2: Saying I should like pick my teeth on the first day,

1627
01:09:15,520 --> 01:09:16,280
Speaker 2: and I should like, if you.

1628
01:09:16,280 --> 01:09:18,960
Speaker 3: Pick your teeth, I should be like kick them.

1629
01:09:18,840 --> 01:09:20,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I don't need a tooth pick. They

1630
01:09:20,120 --> 01:09:20,720
Speaker 1: got minced though.

1631
01:09:20,960 --> 01:09:23,080
Speaker 4: I mean that's so that's you know something, I want

1632
01:09:23,080 --> 01:09:25,040
Speaker 4: to work on it.

1633
01:09:25,640 --> 01:09:29,519
Speaker 2: But like, yeah, Julia, leave us with something. Tell us

1634
01:09:29,960 --> 01:09:34,160
Speaker 2: what you did you have another question? That was it?

1635
01:09:35,000 --> 01:09:35,320
Speaker 1: Okay?

1636
01:09:35,360 --> 01:09:38,280
Speaker 2: So anything that you missed that you feel like, you know,

1637
01:09:38,479 --> 01:09:41,439
Speaker 2: I would just reiterate if those shoulds are coming up

1638
01:09:42,120 --> 01:09:46,240
Speaker 2: in dating, in your current relationship, just look at that

1639
01:09:46,439 --> 01:09:48,439
Speaker 2: and see see what it means.

1640
01:09:48,520 --> 01:09:50,839
Speaker 4: It's not always a bad thing, but if if shoulds

1641
01:09:50,840 --> 01:09:55,040
Speaker 4: are dominating your love life, then maybe you should What.

1642
01:09:55,000 --> 01:09:57,040
Speaker 2: If I'm like, should he should be paying? If it

1643
01:09:57,120 --> 01:09:59,160
Speaker 2: is he got more money than me, I feel like

1644
01:09:59,160 --> 01:10:00,400
Speaker 2: that's a good shoot, talk to him.

1645
01:10:00,800 --> 01:10:01,599
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna talk to him.

1646
01:10:01,600 --> 01:10:05,760
Speaker 2: I'm just not gonna bring my wallette a Julia ware

1647
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:06,799
Speaker 2: of people listening.

1648
01:10:07,040 --> 01:10:10,080
Speaker 4: Catch you plug your podcast? Okay, so I have a

1649
01:10:10,120 --> 01:10:13,720
Speaker 4: podcast with my boyfriend. I'm out relation shops. If you

1650
01:10:13,720 --> 01:10:15,479
Speaker 4: want to hear me talk more about this stuff if.

1651
01:10:15,360 --> 01:10:18,160
Speaker 2: You want to hear more in depth conversations.

1652
01:10:18,600 --> 01:10:22,320
Speaker 4: Hopefully we don't break up dot com or on iTunes.

1653
01:10:22,360 --> 01:10:24,439
Speaker 4: We talked to other couples about this kind of stuff,

1654
01:10:24,439 --> 01:10:27,439
Speaker 4: and then you can find me. Julia Razzi it's with

1655
01:10:27,520 --> 01:10:30,840
Speaker 4: a G. Just google Julia with a G. Comment that

1656
01:10:30,880 --> 01:10:32,479
Speaker 4: all my stuff will come the only one doing it.

1657
01:10:33,520 --> 01:10:34,240
Speaker 2: What a plug?

1658
01:10:34,360 --> 01:10:34,960
Speaker 1: What a plug?

1659
01:10:35,000 --> 01:10:37,040
Speaker 2: You guys? Do you have a like a comedy show?

1660
01:10:37,160 --> 01:10:38,080
Speaker 2: Do you have a show?

1661
01:10:38,720 --> 01:10:40,880
Speaker 3: No, it's on hiatus right now, but they'll be when

1662
01:10:40,920 --> 01:10:41,559
Speaker 3: does this come out?

1663
01:10:41,960 --> 01:10:44,040
Speaker 2: We don't know. We don't even know.

1664
01:10:44,360 --> 01:10:45,360
Speaker 3: I'm always doing something.

1665
01:10:45,640 --> 01:10:48,040
Speaker 2: Okay, we'll find you. I mean, we'll tag all of

1666
01:10:48,040 --> 01:10:51,679
Speaker 2: your social media. This was great. I learned a lot.

1667
01:10:51,800 --> 01:10:54,400
Speaker 1: I learned an iron ship and no that's not true.

1668
01:10:54,520 --> 01:10:56,759
Speaker 2: I learned that I'm actually doing a really good job.

1669
01:10:58,400 --> 01:11:01,240
Speaker 2: I will continue to thrive that thrive and live. You

1670
01:11:01,320 --> 01:11:04,400
Speaker 2: have goals though you're doing stuff. Girl, that was just

1671
01:11:04,479 --> 01:11:09,639
Speaker 2: a little example. That's not my real life. Okay, that's

1672
01:11:09,760 --> 01:11:12,040
Speaker 2: like girl, I still got a couple of checks in

1673
01:11:12,080 --> 01:11:13,000
Speaker 2: the mail. I'm good.

1674
01:11:13,160 --> 01:11:16,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's will kay to be going through a hard

1675
01:11:16,760 --> 01:11:17,479
Speaker 4: financial time.

1676
01:11:17,479 --> 01:11:21,439
Speaker 2: It's just marry you don't don't that a tiny ass

1677
01:11:21,520 --> 01:11:24,400
Speaker 2: ring to Julia's house. I was not gonna First of all,

1678
01:11:24,560 --> 01:11:27,360
Speaker 2: the ring wasn't name of from K's jeweler. Okay, from

1679
01:11:27,439 --> 01:11:31,200
Speaker 2: Jacob to jeweler please. The ring was from Buffalo, a

1680
01:11:31,200 --> 01:11:35,559
Speaker 2: consignment shop ring the bloody ass Hipster Diamond.

1681
01:11:36,200 --> 01:11:36,840
Speaker 1: We're gonna go.

1682
01:11:37,280 --> 01:11:41,599
Speaker 2: You can catch us on Instagram at Unofficial expert at us.

1683
01:11:42,080 --> 01:11:44,680
Speaker 2: You can hit us on Twitter minds as uh just

1684
01:11:44,760 --> 01:11:50,240
Speaker 2: said b w n y C and Reezy on Instagram.

1685
01:11:50,280 --> 01:11:52,360
Speaker 1: I'm Reezy r e e e z y.

1686
01:11:52,520 --> 01:11:54,840
Speaker 2: And then you can catch me uh once a week

1687
01:11:54,960 --> 01:11:57,439
Speaker 2: on YouTube at miss rez m s.

1688
01:11:57,479 --> 01:11:59,400
Speaker 1: R e e e z y.

1689
01:11:59,720 --> 01:12:03,759
Speaker 2: Yes, us questions please add us sliding our dms without

1690
01:12:03,800 --> 01:12:07,439
Speaker 2: dis like. Just ask like real questions, comment for us

1691
01:12:07,520 --> 01:12:10,439
Speaker 2: on your dick and then send us that Yes, We'll

1692
01:12:10,520 --> 01:12:13,280
Speaker 2: ford them all to Julia.

1693
01:12:14,160 --> 01:12:15,800
Speaker 3: And then I'll give you advice on your deck pack.

1694
01:12:15,880 --> 01:12:18,080
Speaker 2: Thank you, and let's shout out Comedy Hype for a

1695
01:12:18,080 --> 01:12:20,519
Speaker 2: little bit, you know, Thank you Comedy Hype. Please listen

1696
01:12:20,560 --> 01:12:24,280
Speaker 2: to all our episodes on there. We also have iTunes, uh,

1697
01:12:24,479 --> 01:12:27,639
Speaker 2: you know, go to Comedy Hype for all of your

1698
01:12:27,680 --> 01:12:31,559
Speaker 2: comedy news. This was fantastic, This was great so much. Uh,

1699
01:12:31,720 --> 01:12:33,439
Speaker 2: you know, just hold up as much as you can

1700
01:12:33,560 --> 01:12:35,080
Speaker 2: and uh maybe you'll find love.

1701
01:12:35,320 --> 01:12:37,439
Speaker 1: You'll never know, find a nigga would enough be to use?

1702
01:12:37,640 --> 01:12:39,800
Speaker 2: And then live your life and avoid the dude that

1703
01:12:39,800 --> 01:12:41,960
Speaker 2: lives next door to his mom. Yeah, because you probably

1704
01:12:42,000 --> 01:12:48,679
Speaker 2: that's too close, Yeah, Julia, I mean yeah, thanks guys,

1705
01:12:48,760 --> 01:12:55,519
Speaker 2: Bye bye