Speaker 1: Calgary Audio. What's up with us, guys? Welcome to another
Speaker 1: episode Mothersucker Podcast. I'm your host, Michael Blackson. I'm here
Speaker 1: with Chinese best friend. How you doing? Hey? Yeah? And
Speaker 1: Mike are you doing? Mike? I'm doing good. Man. You
Speaker 1: know what, I'm gonna be going back to Ghana, so
Speaker 1: we'll be doing from here very soon. Gonna be doing
Speaker 1: it from Ghana. I'm just still gonna call you and
Speaker 1: we're just gonna do it together. When are you leaving?
Speaker 1: Michael Blocks and I never heard you you were going again.
Speaker 1: I have to make it. I have to let you
Speaker 1: know my every move that you can't let Americans know
Speaker 1: what you're doing. Man, what are you doing over there
Speaker 1: building a university? You know, I'm not. The school is
Speaker 1: not finish yet. I got it, baby steps. Oh that's
Speaker 1: good though, that's a good deed. You're doing them kids
Speaker 1: in the streets of a nice school. Yes. Man, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm want to do too. I want to
Speaker 1: I want to have some kind of sports in my
Speaker 1: school man. Yeah, that's a great idea because that's a
Speaker 1: lot of athletes. Yeah. I want to guess some you know,
Speaker 1: get some future Olympics olympians. Yeah, future Olympians. I mean
Speaker 1: we're good at like they played the good soccer players.
Speaker 1: I mean every African run. Do you guys have a
Speaker 1: soccer team and ga yes, Chinese best round. Stupid question
Speaker 1: I was. I haven't watched any soccer game at all. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they have a good they have pretty decent. They made
Speaker 1: decent the past few, you know, the World Cups. I
Speaker 1: mean I'm still disappointed from one from like many years ago,
Speaker 1: when they lost to You would go out on like
Speaker 1: it wasn't it wasn't one in South Africa. In fact,
Speaker 1: Mandatta was alive then and he was so he was
Speaker 1: so pissed about that loss because I was the only
Speaker 1: African team left. They made it all the way through
Speaker 1: the finals. They made to the quarterfinals. They lost better
Speaker 1: this ship that it was a game they should have won.
Speaker 1: So I'm still mad about that game. It was a game,
Speaker 1: A team games. The team has say called you rogue,
Speaker 1: you am I saying Uruguay they wore light blew to
Speaker 1: in South America. That's all I remember. That was a
Speaker 1: nightmare for me. Well he was there nineteen nineties, No,
Speaker 1: motherfucker was like two thousand and um something like, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it could have been either two thousand and four, two
Speaker 1: thousand four or eight. Wow. That that game for the
Speaker 1: rest of your life, because you still remember the one
Speaker 1: of the years. I don't remember, but yeah we took
Speaker 1: a You remember that year the day they lost, But
Speaker 1: you don't remember what year and date you were born?
Speaker 1: No African, the win you were born? Okay, nobody was
Speaker 1: there the right ship that I wasn't born in hospital.
Speaker 1: There was no record of nothing. Okay, when I when
Speaker 1: I got when I was born at first, what do
Speaker 1: you saw for as a nurse? Right, I saw a goat? Well,
Speaker 1: you're born, mad, Mad? I born at home. My mother
Speaker 1: had me home in the backyard, not in the backyard
Speaker 1: somewhere they were midwives. Some some neighbors yanked me out
Speaker 1: of my mom's vagina. Again, Wow, well, we're glad that
Speaker 1: you made it a life. Yes, she pulled me out
Speaker 1: and was a labor long I was. I would think.
Speaker 1: I think I was pulled out by my dick. That's
Speaker 1: probably why, so like stretched out a little more than normal.
Speaker 1: I think that my dick came out first. What you
Speaker 1: came up when you was born? Where came out first? Uh?
Speaker 1: My big head. They had the suction at. Yeah, my
Speaker 1: dick came out first. You had to grab a plunger
Speaker 1: from the toilet suction at. I believe you, Yeah, because
Speaker 1: I got a big hit. Yeah, my dick came out first.
Speaker 1: Did they circumcise you right there when you're born? Well,
Speaker 1: my dick was so big. This circumcised me wise and
Speaker 1: my mother's vagina. They had a give him to pi
Speaker 1: my mother up, cut my dick off, and then it
Speaker 1: so her backup and me out her pussy. Well, that
Speaker 1: must be the happiest day of her life. Finally you're
Speaker 1: out of her. She was happy my dick was out.
Speaker 1: She said, you really kept the rest of my body
Speaker 1: in there and let my dick in. Uh a little.
Speaker 1: My dick came out. She was free. Once my dick
Speaker 1: came out, she thought she was done giving labor to
Speaker 1: me and say, I don't know. He still has a
Speaker 1: head and the leg you know. Um, she said, what
Speaker 1: the biggest part is out? So Well, you're one of
Speaker 1: your mother's favorite building her at school in Ghana. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm my favorite man, and you are your mother's favorite,
Speaker 1: are you? It's very hard, Mike, just eight of us.
Speaker 1: It was eight of us too. She only likes the
Speaker 1: the gay brother. Oh yeah, gay brother. But he's probably
Speaker 1: nice and sweet. Ye. She likes me too, Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: but I mean what do you do for her besides like,
Speaker 1: do you borrow money from your mother to get you?
Speaker 1: When I used to have a lot of money and
Speaker 1: take care of her and then when became broke, she
Speaker 1: takes no, she didn't think of me. I still give
Speaker 1: her some here and there. That's nice, man. Yeah, your
Speaker 1: mother loves you, bless you. You know that was a cough.
Speaker 1: I hope I didn't get that. That new Delta Delta Airlines?
Speaker 1: What what is that? Is the news? The new strand
Speaker 1: of Corona? Who was caring that? Corona today? United States?
Speaker 1: They're the airlines where you always fly American Airlines. Delta
Speaker 1: is the one is Why is it called Delta strain?
Speaker 1: I wonder why they who names them? I mean obviously airlines.
Speaker 1: I guess what airlines they hate? They just name it
Speaker 1: after that, Like I bet softwores is next if they
Speaker 1: want them to go down? Huh? Yeah, do you have
Speaker 1: any hope because spirit, you know, after they called Corona
Speaker 1: Corona beer went down, Yeah, went down on value. Nobody
Speaker 1: want to drink Corona anymore. I never thought about that.
Speaker 1: I bet you the guy the name that one works
Speaker 1: for Budweiser. Right, even the Mexicans don't even want to
Speaker 1: drink corona anymore. But it's that whole new Strand is
Speaker 1: in five states or something like that. It is, uh.
Speaker 1: I don't know, Mike. I haven't watched the news lately.
Speaker 1: I've been hanging out with you too much, and I
Speaker 1: need to, like, we have to stay away from that one.
Speaker 1: I don't you know, but we gotta be shut down again.
Speaker 1: You thinking she didn't shut up. They just opened us.
Speaker 1: Our life's finally good. Yeah, man, we felt good. I
Speaker 1: went to Vegas, that body turning up, no mask, you know,
Speaker 1: hooker's a back selling pussy was very nice. Slot machines
Speaker 1: and black jack. No more glass, the more glass between
Speaker 1: funny looking dialer. Now you could just curs, could high
Speaker 1: five him. Now you can have five to dealer. You could,
Speaker 1: um you go to a concert. I went to the
Speaker 1: dep Chappelle and oh, how was that Joe Rogan and
Speaker 1: the other guy for guys say that out there that
Speaker 1: it's funny. Yeah, you forgot that one the other day too,
Speaker 1: when you told me about Yeah, but it was fifteen people,
Speaker 1: probably about eight people have masks on. Wow, and they're
Speaker 1: the workers. What actually like a lot of fat men
Speaker 1: that just afraid that they have underline overweight disease. You man,
Speaker 1: they were probably just fat man, just crazy guys with
Speaker 1: high blood pressure, low brood pressure, diabetes, minor stroke everything.
Speaker 1: They just they don't need nothing. They want fever and
Speaker 1: then my food is going so they have to protect themselves. Yeah.
Speaker 1: That's some scary ship though, Mike. Another virus coming, I
Speaker 1: don't know. Oh my god, I'm not ready for this.
Speaker 1: That's why I'm going to the Africa. Do they need
Speaker 1: to test you again when you go to the airport
Speaker 1: or you have to get tested three days before three
Speaker 1: days or less before you um, before you travel? Well,
Speaker 1: what else is in the news, Mike, it's about picks? Um? Oh,
Speaker 1: people people are still people are still mad at Bill Cosby.
Speaker 1: Is um. The one guy's pissed um was the guy
Speaker 1: kick Cutty. Kick Cutty yeah, kick Cutty said people cheering
Speaker 1: for Bill Cosby being released idiots. I think that the
Speaker 1: same Niuay that wore a flooria dressed sun dress and
Speaker 1: a spaghetti straps on National Tvfore attention, I'm just curious.
Speaker 1: It's the same. It's the same one, okay on nest
Speaker 1: Niga News eight Nevada Miss America. So Miss Nevada. Yeah,
Speaker 1: was a trans man who wants Miss Nevada? Yes, what
Speaker 1: nobody knew about it? Motherfucker. He wants congratulations. Congratulations either
Speaker 1: he was a very beautiful man or a very handsome
Speaker 1: woman or just official challenge, motherfucker. But congratulation, gratulations. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I can't believe that a whole man want Miss Nevada.
Speaker 1: The very world has changed. Gorgeous man. I'm sure he's
Speaker 1: probably just probably looked better than our women out of
Speaker 1: this transgender's uh, very women, Yeah, because beautiful. I mean,
Speaker 1: they got a lot of very experienced plastic surgery surgeon
Speaker 1: out here. Now, Mike, you know, I'm still so the
Speaker 1: Shakira Richards and grab we already know that. You know,
Speaker 1: she's suspended from the Olympics, right. Oh yeah, I was
Speaker 1: sad about that. But look, she she smoked wheat and
Speaker 1: she still was fast. Imagine if she smoked crack. She
Speaker 1: she brought into the Kentucky Derby and chased rung with
Speaker 1: them horses. Yeah, yeah, that was the reason. I think
Speaker 1: like that they disqualified her because she was Yeah, she
Speaker 1: was smoking high and running fast. If you imagine if
Speaker 1: the judges were like should imagine if she's sober, right,
Speaker 1: seriously chunning? What the fucking punching on it? There's no
Speaker 1: punch line makers, tell your story. I'm sorry, Oh pick
Speaker 1: puff puff daddy, um, he said, growing up, one day
Speaker 1: he woke up he had fifteen roaches on his face,
Speaker 1: and he refused to live like that again. Where the
Speaker 1: fun did you grow up? Where the roaches were that respectful?
Speaker 1: When I grew up when I saw when you turn
Speaker 1: lights on roach's rain. But you know what, I understand
Speaker 1: what he's saying, because I grew up with fifteen fliers
Speaker 1: on my face and I refused to live like that
Speaker 1: as well. The marth of the story is niga that
Speaker 1: grow up with bugs on their face become successful. So
Speaker 1: put some roaches in your face, put some flies in
Speaker 1: your face, and live with mices and rets. Hey McGregor, McGregor,
Speaker 1: that nigga got twenty million dollars to get his as
Speaker 1: beat again. This nig I was getting as be so
Speaker 1: bad he broke his own ankle to get out to
Speaker 1: fight Connor McGregor. Con artist McGregor has pulled off another
Speaker 1: bank robbery. Thank you for robbing us, Well, that's a
Speaker 1: lot of money. Blackpool feeling that the Olympics are hating
Speaker 1: on black people. Blackpool when he pissed right now? So
Speaker 1: the Olympics said she carry can run because she smoked
Speaker 1: with marijuana. Swim caps for African American hair have been banned.
Speaker 1: They cannot wear swim cap? Why yes, swim cap? Man?
Speaker 1: The Black Lives Matter apparel had also been banned. What
Speaker 1: do people realize that all people of color decided to
Speaker 1: protest the Olympics, How it would look. Lithuanian would probably
Speaker 1: win gold medal in man basketball. White people are going
Speaker 1: to be breaking records for wrong reasons. Okay, the slowest
Speaker 1: neat in the history of the one hundred yard dash
Speaker 1: Ireland would probably win. The relay raised and the lightning
Speaker 1: up the torch is probably gonna look like you know what, Mike,
Speaker 1: you're actually right. Imagine that you have you have no
Speaker 1: sports in you man? Can you run? Can you? And
Speaker 1: used to play basketball years ago, but now I can't
Speaker 1: barely dribble. I know somebody that's shorter than you. My
Speaker 1: guest today, motherfucker. He definitely built like a capital. Q
Speaker 1: Um another Zealist celebrity, UH up and coming comedians social
Speaker 1: media influences. He's one of my favorite places to perform.
Speaker 1: I love going to Boston. Boston people just you know,
Speaker 1: it's so real. You know, I like Boston so much.
Speaker 1: It's like everybody that's African from Boston is from kpe Verdi.
Speaker 1: For some reason, everybody stated from kate Verdi did from Boston.
Speaker 1: Boston must have his own part of Africa called kape Verdi.
Speaker 1: And then um, a lot of Haitians in in Cape
Speaker 1: in on Boston also say, should I tell that all
Speaker 1: the Haitians in Boston? I got my nigue on the
Speaker 1: show tonight, Let's welcome my guests to the show. Yeah,
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. Read up Brown, while you have Brown?
Speaker 1: What's good dog? Never see man? Welcome to the Z
Speaker 1: List Celebrity Podcast. All my guests are either they are
Speaker 1: between Q and Z. You are probably a Z list,
Speaker 1: but you definitely definitely on the way to Q. I
Speaker 1: appreciate that. That's cool. Man, been busy man. You know
Speaker 1: the world's open back up, so that's good. But the
Speaker 1: opening back up and then they're trying to threaten us.
Speaker 1: The money might be shutting down again. Do you believe
Speaker 1: they're gonna shot down again or not? Yeah? Absolutely, because
Speaker 1: we don't like humans don't know what the funk they're doing,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like I feel like the
Speaker 1: problem was when COVID happened, a lot of Niggers thought
Speaker 1: they was gonna die, you know what I mean. So
Speaker 1: they're out here doing stupid shit ly still were Like
Speaker 1: the most endangered ones are the blacks, that's what really
Speaker 1: why because we're out too much or some ship No,
Speaker 1: because I guess it attacks it more or something or
Speaker 1: more death. We're black well up blackpool. We have you know,
Speaker 1: I think we got it like the most hyper oppressure beat.
Speaker 1: You know. I think I think we have a um.
Speaker 1: We eat too much fucking sweets and greasy food. That's
Speaker 1: probably where too much. That's probably where we are probably
Speaker 1: the less healthier people. That's it. Good nigga. Did you
Speaker 1: get COVID this year's sir? Yeah, but I had it
Speaker 1: before we knew what COVID was. Oh ship, you're the
Speaker 1: one that started there. I got it from y'all, nigger.
Speaker 1: I got that ship from China. No, but I got
Speaker 1: it in November before we knew what it was. You're
Speaker 1: just sick for I mean, I've had the flu before,
Speaker 1: so when I got sick, I'm thinking it's the flu.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, this is a flu. I'm gonna beat it.
Speaker 1: But that ship was beating my ass to the point.
Speaker 1: If I knew what COVID was, I would have probably
Speaker 1: been walking around the house the whole time, crying like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm about to die. Did you give to anybody? Now?
Speaker 1: I stayed in the house. You know when I get
Speaker 1: when I get sick, I stayed in the house. But
Speaker 1: it was it was sick to the point where I
Speaker 1: would I would shiver for no reason. I would be
Speaker 1: so yet pussy because you know, I mean sure he
Speaker 1: was taking care of me. We didn't funk. I was like,
Speaker 1: I don't want to. If I sweat enough, I'm a
Speaker 1: die in this motherfuckerd was that bad man? Did? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I got it. I got something. You got pussy during COVID.
Speaker 1: So you spread it the ship? You No, I funk
Speaker 1: with a mask on. Oh that's he was about to die,
Speaker 1: he said, or less if it isn't a comp oh ship,
Speaker 1: get a COVID, baby, you have a COVID. Baby doesn't
Speaker 1: keep COVID or does it? Like what happens? You just
Speaker 1: look like Chinese with my girl's agents and baby. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: Then where do you think you gotta serve from us?
Speaker 1: I think probably on the airplane. I was traveling heavy
Speaker 1: around that time. You were traveling delt the lens A
Speaker 1: American Americans, Yeah, American American and something specious. Indeed, they
Speaker 1: gotta cash. They have a song, has a song to
Speaker 1: the haven't played that a long time. The song is
Speaker 1: what doctors like? We love to fly and the shows before.
Speaker 1: I've never heard that ship. He used to work for
Speaker 1: all the airlines in the world for that, and I
Speaker 1: just knew the airline song. I did work for the airline, Mike,
Speaker 1: what's the British airline song? I don't come on, Mike,
Speaker 1: you're the employee of the year. I heard. No, I've
Speaker 1: emerged to come to the Mexico. What's you're making? Tell me?
Speaker 1: I need you making airlines? Um, yeah, I forgot it, Jack.
Speaker 1: I think it better with you making. And I've been
Speaker 1: out of business for a long time, I think, Mike,
Speaker 1: did they ever did your boss ever say hey, Mike,
Speaker 1: you should be the one speaking before we fly. The
Speaker 1: softwarees is the only one that put comedians on the planet,
Speaker 1: and they'd be having their flight attendant was going to
Speaker 1: you're gonna software. They start trying to tell Joe, trying
Speaker 1: to roast this ship's sit you sucking um. They try
Speaker 1: to look. I think all the all the comedians that
Speaker 1: never made it work for something that's funny. So what's
Speaker 1: going on in Boston? Man? You guys are open? Right? Yeah,
Speaker 1: Boston opened up. I haven't been there since it opened
Speaker 1: up yet though. That's one of the places I don't
Speaker 1: want to go yet, Boston. I mean, there's there's a
Speaker 1: couple of places, like I'm not going to Florida because
Speaker 1: it's been it's been wet, it's been open throughout the
Speaker 1: whole COVID, you know what I mean. Like Florida's been
Speaker 1: opened throughout the whole COVID. And with Boston, I got
Speaker 1: too much family there, so I would hate to go
Speaker 1: there and bring it because I'm only going to be
Speaker 1: around family, you know what I mean. So that was
Speaker 1: why already you think you're gonna catch all my family?
Speaker 1: Old I'm like the youngest niggah. How was your mother
Speaker 1: my mother? My mother right now. She's twenty years old
Speaker 1: of me, so she's forty seven. But my grandmother is
Speaker 1: still alive. Seven. How old are your snifty seven? My
Speaker 1: mom's fifty seven, you know, that's still all her. But
Speaker 1: my grandmother is still alive, her sisters, her aunts, and
Speaker 1: they're all in the same area. So I'm like, I
Speaker 1: think one of my aunts caught it and she was
Speaker 1: really sick, but she got better. But after that, I
Speaker 1: was just like, yeah, I gotta stay away from y'all.
Speaker 1: Y'all got diabetes. I have a hard problem. If you
Speaker 1: have a woman's old as your mother, like you have
Speaker 1: a fifty Nah, I'm scared of that because I don't
Speaker 1: wear corndos, Mike, and I heard when you old women,
Speaker 1: the baby come out old. Yeah, if you have if
Speaker 1: you get somebody old pregnant, the baby come out old,
Speaker 1: looks old. Oh like Benjamin Button. Yeah. I'm trying to
Speaker 1: like say, the baby won't come out like, who's the
Speaker 1: old looking nigger, Garrett. We're gonna look like Garrett Morris
Speaker 1: is a baby man. That's a little ask with a
Speaker 1: hat on. Yeah, all your bitches, broad that's that's that's
Speaker 1: the what have you caught? Like because a baby or two.
Speaker 1: We got two babies. I got to boy girl transgender boy.
Speaker 1: I got two boys, a boy and a girl. It's
Speaker 1: funny that you say transjected, because that's really really thick.
Speaker 1: Now I got a boy and a girl. Eleven year
Speaker 1: old boys, seven year old daughter. Congratulations, Hey, congratulations two
Speaker 1: years aparty kind of like are the same brothers, same mother? Damn?
Speaker 1: I got lucky nigg for niggad faithful hit the jackpart. Now,
Speaker 1: I'm not that I'm not faithful. That don't spread that rumor.
Speaker 1: I'm just a lucky nigger. When he becomes an A
Speaker 1: list celebrity. Motherfucker, you're gonna have child up for knocking
Speaker 1: on your door. Have you ever had like how many
Speaker 1: abortions you have? I've only given the four hundred dollars
Speaker 1: up one time, just one time, one time for one time.
Speaker 1: So your pull our game is tight, it's tight. But
Speaker 1: I think I get that ship up when I was
Speaker 1: like eighteen. Oh where you put our game? The four
Speaker 1: hundred when I was eighteen years old? Yeah, I was
Speaker 1: like eighteen years old. I had to scrape that got
Speaker 1: you for the niggative bit from around the way Boston. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you never got got for the four hundred I've been
Speaker 1: got for. It's like it was like three eighty five, y'all,
Speaker 1: y'all got a discount. Now it was it was early
Speaker 1: twos because you got me then then I knew they
Speaker 1: were just getting motherfucker's man, And she was like, I'm pregnancy. Well,
Speaker 1: I can't wait to have our baby, motherfucking ship. And
Speaker 1: then I wouldn't see if if I saw something growing up,
Speaker 1: I can. I'm standing the truth. I think he was lying, bitch.
Speaker 1: Maybe she just ate too much, but there was getting mother.
Speaker 1: You know. Sometimes we're getting people for that money. You
Speaker 1: know I don't pregnant, tell you okay, well you know
Speaker 1: I'm looking for I want to have ten kids. Anyway,
Speaker 1: I was lying there, good, okay, it was good. It's
Speaker 1: trying to get motherfucker's How about Clamdia? Did you catch that?
Speaker 1: And I've never had nothing? You're so lucky on the bitch,
Speaker 1: just I've never had nothing. Man, it's crazy, like I
Speaker 1: would go to if you pulled out real fast. You
Speaker 1: have ford out of theseases. Really, No, that's not true. Now,
Speaker 1: it's not true at all. It's not true. Have you
Speaker 1: caught anything, Mike. That's media, How bad is that ship?
Speaker 1: It's not bad. Just your dick on fire for a
Speaker 1: few days. Mike doesn't go away. You could you just
Speaker 1: go you could um, you just take pills. But if
Speaker 1: they have like some pills you can take for like
Speaker 1: ten days, or you could just get a or they
Speaker 1: want there's want that happened overnight. Just depend if your
Speaker 1: doctor hit you ten day pills, like ten days, you
Speaker 1: can get up pussy if it's like a nice doctor.
Speaker 1: But you know, I take this overnight, you'll be a
Speaker 1: kid tomorrow. But give yourself a three days to like,
Speaker 1: you know, so you ain't affect nobody else. I had
Speaker 1: at a young age, and I was like, oh is
Speaker 1: that fast it happened? And I it was. I was
Speaker 1: like nineteen or twenty when I got burned the first time.
Speaker 1: Was it your co worker from Domino's, Michael Block giving
Speaker 1: away pizza anclo media coming, I remember it was. I
Speaker 1: was early in my sex age. But the think about it,
Speaker 1: But when you first get bron you don't know, like
Speaker 1: I had no idea, you know, I just you know,
Speaker 1: I was so you don't it was I hadn't. I
Speaker 1: don't I have no idea, like so I'm just thinking,
Speaker 1: like just you know, and this how I found out.
Speaker 1: I had a wet dream and I came and burnt myself. Damn. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like I had a wet prain. You know when wet
Speaker 1: drain you come when I when I came and woke
Speaker 1: me out, I like him my burning myself, so I went.
Speaker 1: I remember my doctor is a George guy. He was
Speaker 1: like in the basements somewhere. I went there. He gave
Speaker 1: me some pills. But it was back. This is like nineties,
Speaker 1: so I you know, I took the whole ten day ship.
Speaker 1: I was so scared of sex. I didn't have sex
Speaker 1: with like six or eight months really, so it was
Speaker 1: God just thought everyone was burning once you get Braith
Speaker 1: in the whole world. But he could be a virgin,
Speaker 1: like bitch, I don't trust you, that's funny. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: so lucky I never had and if you did, would
Speaker 1: even Will you be honest enough to tell me each's
Speaker 1: best friend? Yeah, it would be honest. Mike. You know
Speaker 1: I never had nothing. You never had I never I
Speaker 1: promise I've never had nothing. Ever, I promise I've never had.
Speaker 1: Not a real niggle until you get burnt, Why has
Speaker 1: it got to be that because man, you're nothing like
Speaker 1: you just want you just want me to feel what
Speaker 1: you went through that that wet dreamsh it is sad
Speaker 1: that I know that ship was crazy? Man, how often
Speaker 1: do you think about that ship? I'm that's that's that's on.
Speaker 1: That's the part they to make me where like, you know,
Speaker 1: get me scared that I think about that all the time. Man.
Speaker 1: You know, but now you could kind of like you know,
Speaker 1: I was you you don't know, but now you live
Speaker 1: and you learn, you know what I'm saying, Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: that's crazy man. At means but you know a lot
Speaker 1: of times you know, you don't know, so like it's
Speaker 1: good to experience it. Now you start to like you
Speaker 1: know the ways of no woman's burning something you Yeah,
Speaker 1: you can look at her. But my thing is like
Speaker 1: with me, I've been I'm like a relationship nigger. Like
Speaker 1: right after I graduated, I was with the mother my kids,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Anything after that, I moved
Speaker 1: to l A. I was with one person so crazy,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Yeah, I wasn't. I wasn't
Speaker 1: in these streets like I've had my dick on the
Speaker 1: crap table a few times but now not. I mean
Speaker 1: now I'm matured now, you know, but since when Michael
Speaker 1: Black mature? Now I know, I don't sunk anything anymore. Pause.
Speaker 1: We have condoms, and you know, back then condom was expensive.
Speaker 1: I wasn't. I was making minimum wages, so I had
Speaker 1: to put my life either my life on the line.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna spend his five dollars. Yeah, it was so
Speaker 1: embarrassing buying condoms at seven and eleven before. Yeah, it
Speaker 1: was kind of. Yeah, they look at your funny You're
Speaker 1: the fucking CAUs here. That's why I'm like, what size
Speaker 1: was you buying? Just being watch or small? I was,
Speaker 1: I think jerking off. Pause, But like it kind of
Speaker 1: helped my dick grow because when I when I got
Speaker 1: burd to do that. When I got burnt, I was
Speaker 1: so scared of sex. I chuked off for eight months straight.
Speaker 1: And that's what I went from like regular condom to magnum.
Speaker 1: So it's like practicing Olympics. It's like it's like muscles,
Speaker 1: Like you know, I had no idea, just like working out,
Speaker 1: you go from no muscles to muscle. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: you know, Olympics, right, but don't tell, don't tell. People
Speaker 1: that because all these niggas gonna jerk off. Man, you
Speaker 1: tell all these niggs and jerk off to get their
Speaker 1: shipped right. Ye, But yeah, man, I'm I'm good about
Speaker 1: that ig. Stay busy, huh. Yeah. Michael Blux and he
Speaker 1: answers every phone, every tax everything. Yeah, he's one of
Speaker 1: the nicest people I've ever met. Bro. I appreciate it. Man.
Speaker 1: Let's let's get to your career. Dog. I actually had him.
Speaker 1: I took him on the road for me. I took
Speaker 1: him on the road a few times. This is one
Speaker 1: guy that's up and rising, funny guy social media. Every
Speaker 1: skit you do, it's hilarious. Man, What part of your
Speaker 1: brains come up with them crazy ship? To be honest
Speaker 1: with you, it's one of them things where like when
Speaker 1: I started doing social media, I respected comedy so much
Speaker 1: that I didn't want to just jump out there and
Speaker 1: do anything, you know what I mean. I didn't want
Speaker 1: to do ship that makes people like you be like, hey, nigger,
Speaker 1: you're doing this wrong, you know. So to have people
Speaker 1: like you think I'm funny, and people like Rail or
Speaker 1: any any comedian that's up there come to me and
Speaker 1: say that I make them laugh it became the thing
Speaker 1: I was chasing. Like, I wasn't trying to make like
Speaker 1: everybody laugh, I'm trying to make comedians laugh because if
Speaker 1: y'all are laughing, I know it's funny, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. So that that was that was really dope
Speaker 1: to me being around y'all and seeing that y'all think
Speaker 1: the ship was funny, you know what I mean? And you, um,
Speaker 1: you know, you came out doing a social media error,
Speaker 1: so which was great for you guys or like us,
Speaker 1: we can't mind an era where we had no social media,
Speaker 1: We had no audience. We had to go on stage
Speaker 1: to build an audience, you know, and like now you guys,
Speaker 1: you know people like you, that's funny. DC Young Flies
Speaker 1: another guy they're like, can through social media build a
Speaker 1: name by himself, you know, build a fan base and
Speaker 1: then learn how to be a stand up comic. And
Speaker 1: now he's a successful comic and he got social media
Speaker 1: and back in his pocket. So now the kids making
Speaker 1: a whole lot of money and that's you know you
Speaker 1: So you guys, like I said, you guys are very fortunate.
Speaker 1: Now you'll got the social media to build your orders.
Speaker 1: You have like almost eight hundred thou followers. That's a
Speaker 1: very good number. Man. Better think about it, and then
Speaker 1: you know he's not like one of the guys that
Speaker 1: by you ain't bino follower. You could tell his followers
Speaker 1: are real because he put his content is funny and
Speaker 1: co is funny to get shared by people, and that's
Speaker 1: how the followers coming. You know, the amount of trudging
Speaker 1: of motherfucker's out there, that buying and we see that.
Speaker 1: I mean, even with even with you, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Like you, you you was already doing comedy, but
Speaker 1: to jump on social media and and to just see
Speaker 1: how it works, you know what I mean. I know
Speaker 1: you're doing a podcast now, you know what I mean
Speaker 1: because you see the power up social media. So for
Speaker 1: us like niggas like me DC that actually understood it
Speaker 1: and then took it like to comedy like, it's dope
Speaker 1: for you guys to like appreciate that and respect the
Speaker 1: niggas out of really doing it right, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. So my hats off to y'all for that.
Speaker 1: Ship appreciate that. Man. Um, Let me see, so let
Speaker 1: me see. Do you remember the first time you see
Speaker 1: me do anything? There's anything this was your birthday party.
Speaker 1: Remember you did the roast in New York. I wasn't
Speaker 1: even a comic, man, I wasn't even a comedian that
Speaker 1: this was ten years ago. I wasn't even a comic
Speaker 1: that Michael had a birthday roast in New York. And
Speaker 1: I went with a couple of friends. And after he
Speaker 1: let the comics go, He's like, Yo, does anybody in
Speaker 1: the crowd want to roast? I was like, Nick, I
Speaker 1: need that microphone, you know what I mean? And I
Speaker 1: went up there and I like, I was roasting. It
Speaker 1: was so much fun. But that's when you was like, man,
Speaker 1: you should really try this ship. That's how we connected
Speaker 1: on Twitter. First on Twitter, were roasting back and forth,
Speaker 1: and then that's when he invited us to the birthday party,
Speaker 1: so that it was dope to give you some inspirations. Absolutely, Mike. Now,
Speaker 1: every time I see Mike, got tell him he's he
Speaker 1: inspired me to really get this ship going, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean? That's amazing, man, Yeah, you expecting to.
Speaker 1: I have no idea who's coming in. We might need
Speaker 1: to give him a lupdance. He's never experienced clare media.
Speaker 1: Maybe two days to day are none of my friends act.
Speaker 1: You don't happen to be in a relationship with a
Speaker 1: baby or user. No, I'm in a relationship, but I
Speaker 1: can do what I want though. Oh whoa, yeah, she
Speaker 1: don't what a lucky guy. Very yeah, Um, it's a
Speaker 1: fisher when I stuck out. My Patreon page is now
Speaker 1: live my weekly titty Tuesday and Toking Thursdays, moving exclusively
Speaker 1: to Patreon, where they would no longer be sensor about
Speaker 1: the social media companies. I would also be sharing dully
Speaker 1: updates plus show announcements here first see you on Patreon,
Speaker 1: your mother suckers? Wow? So what's what's so? Now? You
Speaker 1: build your audience your stand up as great? How much
Speaker 1: of time can you do now? A good forty five?
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna it is, but it's not. It's not
Speaker 1: a great forty Like I like, I know, I'm the
Speaker 1: comedian that I know who I can't follow. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna go on state and just be like yeah, but
Speaker 1: I want to know who's on the list because I
Speaker 1: want to work on my ship. I don't I'm not
Speaker 1: in the mood to compete, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I just really want to make people laugh, so I
Speaker 1: gotta get that hour for it to be like, all right,
Speaker 1: now I can go out there and do whatever the
Speaker 1: funk I want. But that's good. That's good as you
Speaker 1: know where you are in comedy. It doesn't happen overnight.
Speaker 1: Trust me, get better with age. It's like wine, older
Speaker 1: the better. So when did you as a comic, when
Speaker 1: did you feel like, all right, um, I got it now?
Speaker 1: Um probably honestly, like right now is like the most.
Speaker 1: I'm so comfortable now with any stage. I just I
Speaker 1: did something in l A this week and Jay Leno
Speaker 1: came around. He came out and you know, open up wow,
Speaker 1: you know, and like when you go behind a legend
Speaker 1: like that and you know, destroy the crowd. You know that,
Speaker 1: you know you haven't like standard I said, we get
Speaker 1: better with age. I mean I probably felt very very comfortable. Maybe,
Speaker 1: uh let me see if the Twitter probably about ten
Speaker 1: years ago. So ten years ago I was already fifteen
Speaker 1: years in, you know, so yeah, so fifteen years in
Speaker 1: I felt like, you know, am I could do anything.
Speaker 1: And then now it's you know, even as I got older,
Speaker 1: now I think I'm even better and better. I'm getting
Speaker 1: we comedy you just get better still. I mean, Mike,
Speaker 1: that was the craziest performance I've ever seen him. Every
Speaker 1: person there was crying, laughing, But you're talking about this
Speaker 1: weekend's performance. They didn't even want to get off their seats.
Speaker 1: They were still sitting down. I was like, at least
Speaker 1: the new for the ten o'clock shows, there were all
Speaker 1: the same people. Oh no, I've seen him do that
Speaker 1: ship uh in Canada when we did Toronto. Yeah, we
Speaker 1: did Toronal and I think I did fifteen minutes and
Speaker 1: after I went in the crowd to just watch, and
Speaker 1: I know Mike set, but I'm just in the crowd
Speaker 1: to watch the crowd, and I'm just like, I'm not
Speaker 1: making them do this. This is different, Like it's different
Speaker 1: when you make people laugh and then you see somebody
Speaker 1: making everybody hold their stomach, It's like, oh, I gotta
Speaker 1: get to work, you know what I mean. So like
Speaker 1: seeing Ship like that is what makes me want to
Speaker 1: get back on stage and really work and get to
Speaker 1: like learn how to do this ship. Trust me, he's
Speaker 1: gonna get better and better. Man hitting that stage when
Speaker 1: that's how you hit the stage. Um I did uh
Speaker 1: me I go out with Ryan Davis now we did
Speaker 1: um not what I featured from every once in a while,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, But depending on what he's doing.
Speaker 1: But we did Atlanta. Yeah, Atlanta was the last place
Speaker 1: we did. Actually, that was we sent the last couple
Speaker 1: of months. Yeah, it was the last month actually, and
Speaker 1: then we're doing uh, we're doing actually hosted in Houston
Speaker 1: next weekend. So we're doing COVID when you um, because
Speaker 1: I know we got shut down March. I got shut
Speaker 1: down like March and Levinach was like three tours and
Speaker 1: they just shut it, shut out the money. So when
Speaker 1: you were shut out for March, when did you go
Speaker 1: on stage after that? Um? Yeah, during COVID, I went
Speaker 1: and did one zoom shotty like. But but they did
Speaker 1: it where you can you're on stage and they had
Speaker 1: TVs of like like fifty people just watching you, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So yeah, it was cool, but
Speaker 1: it's not I didn't. I didn't like it though. It's
Speaker 1: not the same at all. Now, Hey, yeah, did you
Speaker 1: have to wear a mask? No? Seriously, like I saw
Speaker 1: them wear a mask. There was one audience, right, there's
Speaker 1: a few audience on a on the next to you,
Speaker 1: a few audiences. No, there was nobody. So it was
Speaker 1: just it was just me. All the comics were there,
Speaker 1: the club owner was there, and everybody else was just
Speaker 1: watching through like the television. But they wanted the effect
Speaker 1: of the stage. You know what I mean. That's weird. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean it's I don't I didn't like that. I
Speaker 1: don't like that error comedy, you know. I say that
Speaker 1: because I don't want it to go back there. But
Speaker 1: the whole zoom ever and all that, it wasn't for me. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it wasn't for me. Man, did you do a zoom show? No?
Speaker 1: I did something like, Um, it wasn't a zoom was
Speaker 1: like more like ah like an online uh roasting thing
Speaker 1: love like I did see that trash. Yeah it's a
Speaker 1: weird vibe man. Yeah you can't hear people are laughing
Speaker 1: on the internet. M you know, um damn it. So
Speaker 1: now your father, when you suggest your kids being comedians,
Speaker 1: I think my daughter is gonna be one. My son isn't.
Speaker 1: Isn't as funny, so like he's mean, So I tell him, yeah,
Speaker 1: you gotta chill out. But my daughter I let her
Speaker 1: explore it. Like if you find something you think it's funny,
Speaker 1: go ahead, be funny. I'll give you that mulligan of
Speaker 1: trying to be funny first, but my son. I don't
Speaker 1: think my son got it. Bro, Yeah, he don't got it.
Speaker 1: He's just a me. Did he mean he likes to
Speaker 1: play sports, karate ship like that, but making a joke,
Speaker 1: It's like, no, he want to hurt your feelings. So
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, you can't indulge in this ship. But
Speaker 1: my daughter she knows she she's my daughter's on one.
Speaker 1: That's like, we had a roast in competition one day.
Speaker 1: I had my daughter and son go at it. I
Speaker 1: want to see if y'all know what you're doing, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So my daughter's turned, I tell
Speaker 1: how to do it. I'm like, you just want to
Speaker 1: get straight to the point in salt, be funny. So
Speaker 1: my daughter's like your mother's ugly. I'm like, yeah, that's funny,
Speaker 1: that's really funny. It's funny as ship. Seven year old
Speaker 1: keep going. My son is the nigga. That's just like,
Speaker 1: you don't know the difference between a goat and the sheep.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, nigga, stopped, Like that's not how you wrote. Yeah,
Speaker 1: my daughter really doesn't know the difference between the goat
Speaker 1: and the sheep. But she's seven. No that she's seven,
Speaker 1: he's eleven. Sheep and a goat. No, it's not the same.
Speaker 1: Something that say't man like that? No, that's the sheep.
Speaker 1: The sheep the wool. A goat got the horns, but
Speaker 1: the sheep doesn't talk like that. No, that's a that's
Speaker 1: a goat. I ain't welcome to the show. How y'all
Speaker 1: doing so? The sheep and the goat? I mean, don't
Speaker 1: the bull sitting mad? Yeah? Mike, is that the same?
Speaker 1: He doesn't. Maybe the joke was for you know, I
Speaker 1: eat goat. I don't listen to me. Maybe the joke
Speaker 1: was for you towards your son. He was talking about man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you don't know the difference between the goat and the sheep. Damn.
Speaker 1: You're right, that is funny. So that makes it a
Speaker 1: good joke. What do you think takes about a goat?
Speaker 1: On land from Boston? You some curry goat? Right, yeah,
Speaker 1: of course, But no, that's different. You're saying curry go
Speaker 1: curry goal is too good. I don't care what you
Speaker 1: do to a lamb. I'll take the goat for real
Speaker 1: lab shops now, I'll take the goat for something. I
Speaker 1: think lamb. Meat tastes better. I don't know, is it?
Speaker 1: Because what make meat tastes better as anyway it was raised?
Speaker 1: It the little juicy fats on it. Like that What
Speaker 1: makes I like oxtail better than steaks? Sometimes? For realail
Speaker 1: is different, bro, But you know what makes a steak
Speaker 1: tastes good and bad? Sometimes? The way that is the
Speaker 1: way to kill the cow. Yes, if if you die angry,
Speaker 1: you're not gonna be all tender. You know you shot
Speaker 1: the motherfucker. You gotta kill in a certain way. You
Speaker 1: gotta like, you gotta cut something. Tell me you're not
Speaker 1: gonna die, and you're not gonna die. Song How you
Speaker 1: gonna kill a cow? Mike sing a song? If you
Speaker 1: shoot a cow, he's gonna be very stiff. It's gonna
Speaker 1: be a tough meat. Right, he's angry. He die angry.
Speaker 1: He's not gonna give you a good meat to eat.
Speaker 1: Massage him, you know, probably get like a female cow
Speaker 1: to suckers dick, yeah him, motherfucker right, busting the nut.
Speaker 1: Cut his throat. Yeah, how did they kill a call anyways?
Speaker 1: Cut the throat to white America? I think they shoot
Speaker 1: them and you know it's like it's like it's a
Speaker 1: nail gun. So it's like I've seen that. It's like
Speaker 1: a long ass nail gun and the nail just comes
Speaker 1: out and goes back in put it to his head
Speaker 1: and that's not nice. Yeah, we can't. I would never want, like,
Speaker 1: I don't want to know how we make none of
Speaker 1: our food anymore. I mean I've killed the chickens, how
Speaker 1: like cut the head off. Well yeah, but you see
Speaker 1: you said you're not America sometimey I just cut it
Speaker 1: off and let the ship run all crazy. That's torture, afriga.
Speaker 1: We you know, we dig a hole in the ground.
Speaker 1: You gotta keep kill them peacefully. Don't have them all
Speaker 1: in jumping up. It's gonna make him not soft. You
Speaker 1: want the chicken to be nice and tender when you
Speaker 1: eat it. It's all how you kill them. So what
Speaker 1: we do we you know, you grab the leg, grip
Speaker 1: bull flegs, you step your foot on the bull flegs,
Speaker 1: you put the wings together backwards, you put your other
Speaker 1: leg on the wing. That's tort your motherfucker. That's the
Speaker 1: stiffest chicken you're gonna have. That's that's in the ground
Speaker 1: because you want to pour that blood you peel some
Speaker 1: hair off his neck and then you just right he
Speaker 1: got both legs. He's down, he can't move nowhere. He's
Speaker 1: just color the throat and you pour the blood in
Speaker 1: the ground in the hole. That's way worse. They're just
Speaker 1: chopping that out, just jumping around like Philippics. Mike, we
Speaker 1: chopped the head off and he runs around. Would you
Speaker 1: want to be that's that's horrible. And then on your
Speaker 1: birthday you killed and then you put across right with
Speaker 1: the blood put you put the blood on your forehead.
Speaker 1: I didn't know that now I think about it. It
Speaker 1: was like, but don't you guys eat chicken blood like
Speaker 1: I've seen it. It's a big blood. It's you drink it,
Speaker 1: you cook it. And then they added some interesting and
Speaker 1: stuff in there, so like a sauce. Basically, yeah, a
Speaker 1: lot of a lot of people think it's chocolate soup.
Speaker 1: So I pulled a lot of my friends. Wait, hold on,
Speaker 1: you fed your friends pig blood and told him what
Speaker 1: rice in it? Mike, don't have me come to none
Speaker 1: of this. Mike had some No, I brought one here before,
Speaker 1: trick me. Yeah, no, I told you it was some
Speaker 1: little soup. I forgot. I told you, remember one time
Speaker 1: I brought like Filipino food. You liked it. You're like,
Speaker 1: what is this little soup? Don't worry, Mike, it was
Speaker 1: it was cook real good. It was. It's cool, real good,
Speaker 1: said a little soup. You me the order tonight. No, motherfucker,
Speaker 1: I can wear eight pigs blood. That's probably I've been
Speaker 1: fucking passing gays the past ten years. I'm was this
Speaker 1: that was about to be maybe like eight nine months ago.
Speaker 1: You know, you know I told you. I don't remember
Speaker 1: your telling me. I got a bunch of you like it.
Speaker 1: You're like, this is good. He's sucking it up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I knew what it was. It up now he didn't.
Speaker 1: He said. He told me it was chocolate. Okay, you
Speaker 1: liked it, like that's that's what Roder does. But I
Speaker 1: don't trick me. She'll tell me because you know, she
Speaker 1: knows she's Asians. You know how to make African food,
Speaker 1: so she wouldn't tell me she's making African students. You
Speaker 1: tell me, Mike, I'm making Chinese stew and I eat
Speaker 1: him like this is good, make African students. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: all in the mind, you know. No, that's not true
Speaker 1: because my girl she makes a vegan ship and then
Speaker 1: I like it a lot, like it a lot, and
Speaker 1: the next thing, you know, she goes, oh that's vegan.
Speaker 1: I'm like, funk, I don't want it. Oh, I see
Speaker 1: what you're saying, Like like it with your brain. If
Speaker 1: it's like grass me, let's let me me to change
Speaker 1: this up here the time I told what Olympics with
Speaker 1: it shot sharing Richard and good. Yeah, what do you
Speaker 1: do you think black um um protests looking not boycott Olympics? Nah?
Speaker 1: I don't think black people should boycott because there's too
Speaker 1: many other black people come in, you know what I mean,
Speaker 1: Like like, it sucks what she's going through. But at
Speaker 1: the same time, it's like, all right, just come back
Speaker 1: in four years. Like when when we four years is
Speaker 1: a long years. It's not Michael Felts came back in
Speaker 1: four years and went crazy. Oh he didn't crazy. When
Speaker 1: Michael felt got in trouble for weed. He came back
Speaker 1: in four years and broke every fucking record. That what happened, Yes, nigger,
Speaker 1: that's that's when he went and got his twenty second medal.
Speaker 1: He just got in the water. Shut the funk up
Speaker 1: and he killed ship. She's in position to do that
Speaker 1: four years. Yeah, she's like one, she's like twenty something. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's she's young. So she comes back in four years
Speaker 1: and she's still the fastest woman on the planet. She's
Speaker 1: gonna shatterw rec and now it's gonna be bigger than ever.
Speaker 1: She's gonna get every endorsement. But if we voycott it
Speaker 1: now and then she doesn't come back, and people are like,
Speaker 1: we don't give a funk, it's not gonna do nothing.
Speaker 1: Like she's in because like she's not competing for the Olympics,
Speaker 1: she's the fastest woman on the planet. She's gonna win.
Speaker 1: She's already gonna wind. So it's like, yeah, I'll say
Speaker 1: it for four years. She's still making money right now,
Speaker 1: just running everywhere else, and then she's gonna be fine.
Speaker 1: She's gonna have a weird company. I mean she was, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know if she smokes a lot of weirds
Speaker 1: so to be able to run anymore. She was flirting
Speaker 1: with the baby, so she might have a baby. She
Speaker 1: is I wouldn't that fast. I'm definitely gonna none at
Speaker 1: her and have the fastest baby on Earth. Man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but what do you feel that way, like about w
Speaker 1: NBA women too, would you not in the w a
Speaker 1: w n B a woman to have another I don't want.
Speaker 1: I don't want a basketball daughter. You know, I'm a
Speaker 1: fast woman or a big woman that where I have
Speaker 1: an NFL player. I don't want to toss seven ft girl.
Speaker 1: I got a seven foot daughter. I can't even find
Speaker 1: a man to marry her. You know, she's stuck in
Speaker 1: at she's thirty five years O. Came find her husband
Speaker 1: and she's change your light. Boy without ladder, You'd rather
Speaker 1: have a fat daughter than a seven I'd rather have
Speaker 1: a fat son. Give me a seven hundred pound, greasy
Speaker 1: little nigger that could fucking tackle somebody, then a seven
Speaker 1: foot daughter seven fourth door. She just hit uh, you know,
Speaker 1: just pick things up and that's forty. Yeah. I want
Speaker 1: I'm I'm I'm a I'm a big girl. I got
Speaker 1: a big bit just to have a big I haven't
Speaker 1: been a nice get birth to another. She killing nail
Speaker 1: like black J. J. Watts or something. I take that.
Speaker 1: I'll definitely I take a big boy, big girl. Absolutely.
Speaker 1: You know, a big girl just's gonna eat, she's gonna
Speaker 1: do nigger. She might beat your ass. She's gonna be
Speaker 1: a straight nigger in the house. Yeah, I don't. I
Speaker 1: don't need that pressure. Man, it's tough man, Yeah stuff
Speaker 1: having kids, yeah already. Yeah. Now you're gonna have to
Speaker 1: deal with boyfriends. Oh yeah, I don't want to deal
Speaker 1: with boyfriends. If she got a boyfriend, he's gonna be
Speaker 1: eight feet tall nigger. If she's seven ft yeah, he's
Speaker 1: gonna be eight feet hard to find the day. You
Speaker 1: know what, there's a dating site for him for tall people. Yeah,
Speaker 1: just like that clothing place right there. Yeah. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: called Tall People and Small People dot com dat you like.
Speaker 1: They have all kinds of ship out, social media, worldwide web,
Speaker 1: everything's there. I'm gonna go on it just to see
Speaker 1: some tall as bitches. I want to see how many
Speaker 1: are really on the planet. Yeah, let us slept with
Speaker 1: She was six three now I'm five seven. So when
Speaker 1: you hugged out like she had, we had to be
Speaker 1: like sitting down and laying down the kiss. It wasn't no,
Speaker 1: I'm not standing on my tippy toes. You don't gotta
Speaker 1: bend over. But yeah, she was tall as fucking She
Speaker 1: loved wearing heels too. Wow. Yeah, it was has like
Speaker 1: putting a TikTok in her whales mouth. Man, did you
Speaker 1: ever take photos with her? Or no? Na, never man
Speaker 1: never took pictures with her. I mean it was. It
Speaker 1: was one of the things where younger he was younger. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so whenever I was like it was when I was
Speaker 1: starting comedy, whenever I'd be in town, we kick it,
Speaker 1: we hang out, we'd go to the movie ship like that.
Speaker 1: But like and we sunk around. But it was one
Speaker 1: of the things where it's like, way too tall for me.
Speaker 1: Wait where she lives. She's Boston, Yeah, Boston, way just
Speaker 1: walking around. Yeah, she played ball in high school. She
Speaker 1: average eleven rebounds a game. Wow, eleven rebounds again, more
Speaker 1: rebounds than your kill on his pass, more than Dennis
Speaker 1: around me. Yeah, yeah, that's what I undt. Yeah, it's
Speaker 1: a lot of rebounds. But that's the thing. I'm tall
Speaker 1: women and you love too, though not been I've been
Speaker 1: with a big woman. I've taught six something six ft
Speaker 1: like like six too, yeah, probably, Yeah, I like I
Speaker 1: like big women. Tall women are cool, man, I like,
Speaker 1: I mean, I like big women period too. Like I bang,
Speaker 1: I've banged a lot of big women. I've banged some
Speaker 1: really like four hundred pounders, and you like you are
Speaker 1: attracted to bigger women like I mean yeah, I mean
Speaker 1: I sucked them. I'm attracted to them before. Ye shallow
Speaker 1: really yeah like that movie. Yeah, but shallow how he
Speaker 1: was looking at something else? Yeah, you're absolutely right. I
Speaker 1: like a challenge. Man, What what do you mean a challenge? Yeah?
Speaker 1: You guys, you like you like little skinny model girls.
Speaker 1: Man like a woman that you know, a big, usual woman.
Speaker 1: Oh that way he tried to do everything in one
Speaker 1: night type ship. Yeah. Yeah, he used to be making
Speaker 1: all the big girls happy angels. Not anymore, you're over it? Yeah,
Speaker 1: not that I got a new relationship. Yeah, so I
Speaker 1: slowed down now yeah, man, unless who happened to three something? Yeah? Before? Yeah,
Speaker 1: but she's my girl on the moment that she's like Mike,
Speaker 1: I have to pick them where I'm gonna pick some
Speaker 1: skinny bit yeo's that the cracking we're sleeping with the night.
Speaker 1: I don't want it. I don't want I don't want that.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna I'm going in against room to lay
Speaker 1: down for a sign. I'm I'm going up hubing from me.
Speaker 1: Something man, you ever had three sings. Man, the only
Speaker 1: thing I've done I've got head from two girls at once.
Speaker 1: I've never had like a three something like where I
Speaker 1: was like, yeah, give me a head of the same sign.
Speaker 1: Never never got the pussy twitter like at the same
Speaker 1: time before. Was your period on or something? No, it
Speaker 1: was it was this is all happened. I was at
Speaker 1: a at a party and there was a girl who
Speaker 1: was running the party. She had this other girl that
Speaker 1: was walking around and she was just like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: looking for somebody to like hang like hook up with tonight.
Speaker 1: So the girl who would run in the party was
Speaker 1: looking for a dude for her to hook up with.
Speaker 1: So I asked her. I'm like, yo, you're taking like
Speaker 1: request for your party. She's like yeah. I was like, well,
Speaker 1: I never had got a head from two girls before.
Speaker 1: She said, I'll be right back, came back with who women.
Speaker 1: I was like, Hey, this is the situation. They took
Speaker 1: me in the bathroom and did the ship Did you come? Absolutely,
Speaker 1: it would have been off a pure excitement that I
Speaker 1: wouldn't having like coming to come with having me. I
Speaker 1: have not not have sex like three days. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: come with head like not jerk off not have sex
Speaker 1: from the come with head and as I'm more off
Speaker 1: a pussy person. What are you like Jenny's best friend?
Speaker 1: Put what's better? Pussy your head? I'm saying, can you
Speaker 1: come with head easily? Yeah? You get you won't give you?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah all the time, Mike, you know what happens
Speaker 1: when you get your head? Jenny's best friend, Damn, I
Speaker 1: can't see you close your eyes when you get your head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're just stare at the fucking goddamn why you looking
Speaker 1: at her face? Used to get shot when you look
Speaker 1: back at you. So I just do do do do funny? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Oh god? Yeah? So you never had a three so
Speaker 1: you never like, you know what? I want to eat one?
Speaker 1: Are you banging one from the You just have been
Speaker 1: that fortunate or you men? I haven't been that fortunate.
Speaker 1: It's what I said every nigger wants. Yeah, you're a
Speaker 1: zealous I haven't been that fortunate, but I had from
Speaker 1: two bitches. I'm not I'm not up a letter to
Speaker 1: Chinese best friend. You had three something before be away,
Speaker 1: before your relationship. I know your lady listening. She's not
Speaker 1: listening to us. She doesn't even know what channel we're
Speaker 1: on like listening good funny, but she doesn't know what funny?
Speaker 1: So what have you ever had three something? Uh? No,
Speaker 1: not yet, sending back from you three years. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: why I never had three something, never had Colombia. I'm
Speaker 1: not as lucky as you. Yeah, I'm not lucky enough
Speaker 1: to get Colombia. Whack. Wait wait when did you have
Speaker 1: your first? First? My first threesome was damn? You know,
Speaker 1: I almost had one, like when I was younger, you know,
Speaker 1: early two thousands and two thousand five six is like
Speaker 1: four or five between two thousand and four two thousand six, alum.
Speaker 1: But the other girls didn't participate. She was just dead
Speaker 1: when I was what I mean, she didn't just looking,
Speaker 1: you know. But then I fully had a real one.
Speaker 1: And like my first one, real one, one I'm banging
Speaker 1: to Chicken, was probably two thousand between like eight nine
Speaker 1: two ninths. So did it feel good? I felt like
Speaker 1: a kink man. Yeah? Now I won't it all the time.
Speaker 1: I know, I've had like three so I've had four someome,
Speaker 1: I've had like three girls ship my two birthdays I
Speaker 1: had Yeah, I had like me and three women and ship.
Speaker 1: This motherfucker's crazy. That's how you kept the media though.
Speaker 1: I don't know who. You can't figure out where he
Speaker 1: came from. Now you just gotta gotta like, you know, yeah,
Speaker 1: because it's like you some get condom and some don't, like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, who gets the lucky one? Like now, baby,
Speaker 1: we're using condom. You guys still like wipe it off.
Speaker 1: You can't be putting it from one woman to another.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. You can still give him
Speaker 1: something that's too much that you just everybody get a
Speaker 1: physical a week before the thing and then keep you
Speaker 1: know what is this NBA game? Yeah, they gotta get physical. Okay, guys,
Speaker 1: let me see your car, Let me see your physical.
Speaker 1: Everybody when your email me all your resorts, bitch that's
Speaker 1: his fake, won't get go go see your doctor. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: ibody get a physical waybody feels comfortable. See that that's different.
Speaker 1: I don't do that. You gotta be you gotta be
Speaker 1: mature and growing. You's got You can't just you know,
Speaker 1: or you gotta have something before. We mean, you had
Speaker 1: commitia before. So yeah, so you know that nobody gonna
Speaker 1: you know, you know, threesome that's planned a week before.
Speaker 1: I thought three someomes just happened. Like, hey, guys, I
Speaker 1: plan to have a three song on my birthday. Anybody
Speaker 1: would have participate? Please get my email, send me everything
Speaker 1: to this everything what doctor? Who can I call? I
Speaker 1: thought it just happened here? You just want to like
Speaker 1: a week before, two weeks before, you know, he did
Speaker 1: he say he had fifteen roaches on his face? Yeah?
Speaker 1: You like? I mean you still that's a lot. That's
Speaker 1: a lie. That's a lie, right, But you you've had
Speaker 1: roaches before, right, But there's never been fifteen roaches in
Speaker 1: one spot at the same time. He must have passed.
Speaker 1: He must have had a cookie on this fucking nose.
Speaker 1: You got fifteen roaches? Did he lion baby ones? Mike, Nah,
Speaker 1: there's no way he had fifteen, not fifty, Like, yeah,
Speaker 1: one roach, I'd understand, but fifteen on the way they
Speaker 1: run around, they wouldn't. He'd have to have skittles and
Speaker 1: get cupcakes all over his mustache for fifteen roaches to
Speaker 1: get on that snoring nigga's face. I know why? Maybe
Speaker 1: she just a quinlif that day and you're gonna put
Speaker 1: queen the teethirt? What has to do with this? Back
Speaker 1: in the day, don't they have a duet together? They
Speaker 1: didn't Queen the teeth of Queen don't like niggers. Never
Speaker 1: mind Jelo this when he was broken. Oh he was
Speaker 1: broke just before big Yeah, this before if he had
Speaker 1: roaches with j Lo take that, Take that before that.
Speaker 1: That's way before. I've had roaches before. I've never seen
Speaker 1: that many. Well you came up. I mean you're doing
Speaker 1: better than that for you something. You're a full time entertainer.
Speaker 1: You don't have like no secret job in and out
Speaker 1: burger or not not other way like waffle house three in
Speaker 1: the morning on your friends, I speaking, just walk in
Speaker 1: like hey, from the internet. I'm scared of that kind
Speaker 1: of ship. Man. I remember the last day I took
Speaker 1: the bus, nigger, Yeah, I used to. I used to
Speaker 1: when I come to to l A. When I used
Speaker 1: to fly from Boston. When I first started coming out here,
Speaker 1: I would take a bus from the airport to my
Speaker 1: home girl's house because it was only a dollar fifty. Niggers, Wow,
Speaker 1: that's cheap. Yeah. I'd rather take a dollar fifty bus
Speaker 1: than to take a forty dollar uber. And it's literally
Speaker 1: one ride and I'm on the bus. They go on
Speaker 1: my luggage and one nigga is like, hey, you READO Brown.
Speaker 1: I'm like yeah. He said, what the fun you're doing
Speaker 1: on the bus? I was like you right, my digga,
Speaker 1: this this is it, This is it. Yeah, that was it.
Speaker 1: Bro The funniest thing that happened to me be in
Speaker 1: the bus. It was Ninette, you know, just started doing
Speaker 1: stand up. I came to l A to do comic
Speaker 1: for you, and I stayed with my boy, Jamal Dormant,
Speaker 1: He's also a comic, and we was, you know, it
Speaker 1: was poor. We was broke down. You know. We got
Speaker 1: around on the bus to get around and I'm at
Speaker 1: one time and waiting for the bus. While I was
Speaker 1: waiting on the bus, we've seen you know, the bus
Speaker 1: pulled up this girl sitting by the window. Badass, pretty
Speaker 1: face right, and then um we sat down and it
Speaker 1: was like there was a there's an empty seat next
Speaker 1: to us, but then there's no no empty seat next
Speaker 1: to her, and she she was showing us too much love.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I mean, I'm not that cute and I'm
Speaker 1: getting a bust out. Obviously I'm broke, and I'm like
Speaker 1: this girl baddest out. So you know, we both like
Speaker 1: that's mine. He's like, that's me. Mine's like, that's mine.
Speaker 1: We're frightening with his girl already, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And so we actually come and walk towards us, and
Speaker 1: then she walked with a limp. Oh what kind of limp?
Speaker 1: Like a bus rider limp? Like I'm about to sit
Speaker 1: in the front seat. She had like a limp like
Speaker 1: something like that. And I was like, jamr, she's all yours,
Speaker 1: you know. But I think we both just kept the
Speaker 1: number just to be just through, just in case. What
Speaker 1: did you think around on it? I didn't. I'm sure
Speaker 1: your motherfucker that he lived here. We gotta take a
Speaker 1: roller skate and she limped like that take a roller skate.
Speaker 1: You don't got to see that? What you mean, Mike?
Speaker 1: That's she go roller skate and you don't gotta walk. God,
Speaker 1: you don't see the Yeah. So now no more bus
Speaker 1: for you? You live it? Are you still a where
Speaker 1: you're standing up? Stay? I stay out in North Hollywood?
Speaker 1: You got a nicer part man. So you're making money?
Speaker 1: It's totally offen social offer, social media? How do you
Speaker 1: makech how do you make much of your money? Are
Speaker 1: you doing me? You know? Do promos. Uh Facebook page,
Speaker 1: now page, Instagram page. I hope you know that. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: why do my I do mostly pull my my I
Speaker 1: g TV that I haven't been proved to make money yet.
Speaker 1: I just got a yeah, man, you can sit and
Speaker 1: talk when I Are you approved on Facebook or my Facebook?
Speaker 1: Man disappeared a long time. N you know. So, so
Speaker 1: you're doing all this ship it and you ain't making Facebook,
Speaker 1: Instagram money none of that. Ship you make money to
Speaker 1: two dollars per eighty million views. I make. I make
Speaker 1: money up a stand my stand up, But I could
Speaker 1: be making so much more, man, so much more. I mean,
Speaker 1: but that's how that's how we're we're being like we're
Speaker 1: okay now like the niggas in my era and the
Speaker 1: people that I'm cool with, it's that that social media money.
Speaker 1: It's really good. Oh no, I know so many guys
Speaker 1: making it. I heard Country weren't making a killing a
Speaker 1: hundred to three hundred thousand a month one month. I
Speaker 1: mean he he just had a podcast when he said it.
Speaker 1: So I don't want people to feel like I'm telling
Speaker 1: Country ways business. But he was making three hundred thousand
Speaker 1: dollars a while, bron Like now I know, like Mike,
Speaker 1: I like most of these like people that I've worked
Speaker 1: with and hung with, I've seen there. They're the ones
Speaker 1: that showed me how to use Facebook and all that ship.
Speaker 1: These niggas was making some consistently. Mike, your views are
Speaker 1: like freak Chinese bethfriend. Once I get a proof, I'm
Speaker 1: not a proof right now, so I can't make Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: he has to get improved. If you know what, I
Speaker 1: have idea. How to get a proof. You have to
Speaker 1: follow Mark Zuckerberg like every post he post. Guarantee in
Speaker 1: like one week you get a proof. I'm not going
Speaker 1: to be a fucking MAXA group. You know how many
Speaker 1: people are doing that. Everybody's trying that. Are they all approved? No?
Speaker 1: Are you approving? Yeah? I don't like Michael zucker know
Speaker 1: you're verified. No, I'm not verified. That's why, because you
Speaker 1: don't follow him. That's what it is. Don't tell me that. Man.
Speaker 1: I don't believe he's drinking too, so I know it's
Speaker 1: getting worse. Yeah, whatever, what's up? But I s this
Speaker 1: is African king up comedy. Michael Blackson. I'm here to
Speaker 1: ask you a question. Oh you subscribe to my podcast
Speaker 1: The Mother Suck A Podcast with Me Michael Blackson. If not,
Speaker 1: you are missing out on the crazy interviews. They're exclusive
Speaker 1: behind the scenes content of my life and tons of
Speaker 1: celebrit guests. So listen up. But I stuck. Stop what
Speaker 1: you're doing right now and go find the mother suck
Speaker 1: a Podcast with Me Michael Blacks. I heart Radio, Apple,
Speaker 1: Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Subscribe. It's free,
Speaker 1: So go do it right now and don't forget to
Speaker 1: catch a new episode every Tuesday. No, but Mike, definitely,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on this and this once I got
Speaker 1: to prove I'll make some of my g TV money
Speaker 1: and then we I'm gonna try to work and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna trying to go to the Facebook office and funny,
Speaker 1: exactly what the hell happen? And that's the same offer.
Speaker 1: So once you figure out Facebook, they should fix the Instagram.
Speaker 1: So Facebook, the Facebook put like this with me. Facebook
Speaker 1: is the reason why I didn't do a hundred sketches
Speaker 1: every day, you know what I mean, Because the Facebook
Speaker 1: money was so decent that I'm like, Okay, I can
Speaker 1: actually make it through COVID, not burning my burning, using
Speaker 1: all my material, you know what. I mean on social
Speaker 1: media and ship. Yeah, that's good money. That's good man.
Speaker 1: You know, that's just great to find ways of making money. Man,
Speaker 1: we're not going to clocking and working for nobody. You
Speaker 1: like your own boss, you know. And there's an arrow
Speaker 1: in we need social media area now when the cryptocurrency
Speaker 1: or you need a cryptocurrency, you know, no, no, that
Speaker 1: I get it. I had a friend that was telling
Speaker 1: me about bitcoin before it hit, and I never I
Speaker 1: never jumped on it. But I don't I don't know
Speaker 1: enough about it, you know what I mean. So I
Speaker 1: stayed away from that ship. There's a lot right now,
Speaker 1: that's good. There's too many. The other day, you know,
Speaker 1: I put like six dollars. That thing came up like
Speaker 1: forty two days and then it went down like four
Speaker 1: dollars in one day. Like yeah, what that doesn't make
Speaker 1: no sense. You know, I don't have time because everybody
Speaker 1: when everybody sells, everybody sells, it's like are in the house.
Speaker 1: Uh so when you buy them, you gotta you gotta
Speaker 1: get rid of at the right time most of it,
Speaker 1: Like you know you're gonna leave, leave some inia, but
Speaker 1: get something out. See I it was thirty earlier before
Speaker 1: the show started, baby if I checked now it's right now,
Speaker 1: but it goes up though. You gotta get the right
Speaker 1: one because there's a lot of scams, you know. They
Speaker 1: gotta get the little coins, you know, so like the
Speaker 1: other like there's a lot of scam coins out there
Speaker 1: right now, there's Yeah, there's a lot of scam coins.
Speaker 1: Those are bad, you know, you go, what are some
Speaker 1: of the scam coins that you know of? You know,
Speaker 1: like for example, if you know, Elon must make make
Speaker 1: a baby Dodge coin like doge coin. Who did that?
Speaker 1: A Dodge started with like a meme that's a meme
Speaker 1: coin like it was a joke and it was up
Speaker 1: and down, up and down, and then Elon must decide
Speaker 1: to take it and then that ship went up like crazy.
Speaker 1: And uh now people add like baby Doge step brother Doge.
Speaker 1: You know. So there's all these scams Chinese dogs. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So but you gotta meet the right people because they're
Speaker 1: they're all in the telegram. I made a few which
Speaker 1: is really good, you know space space uh you know
Speaker 1: Space Dogs. That was good coin and uh yeah, there
Speaker 1: you gotta meet the right people because they tell you,
Speaker 1: like pre sale, you gotta get it before it comes out,
Speaker 1: you know, you got you gotta be on it way
Speaker 1: before to make to make the real money. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so there's all kinds of stuff. It's crazy though, but
Speaker 1: there's still a lot of money out there. Man. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's my I'm scared of the star market. Man. I
Speaker 1: don't know enough about it to jump in that ship.
Speaker 1: It took me seven days. I just saved my money, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'd rather just be like fucking I'm good because it's
Speaker 1: gambling at the end of the day. You know, if
Speaker 1: you if you know what you're doing. You just told
Speaker 1: me your ship went down the four dollars there, and
Speaker 1: then I sent a bit going to some other address
Speaker 1: and that's it. Bye bye. It's not like you could
Speaker 1: call somebody, Hey, y'all, I didn't order uber today. It
Speaker 1: was who you know, can't call anybody, so you send
Speaker 1: the roll address bye bye? Yeah. Oh yeah you can't.
Speaker 1: You can't complain to anybody, My god, go crazy, bro,
Speaker 1: Yeah I did. That was losing all that kind of money, bro,
Speaker 1: that's that's noth I was losing like six seven days,
Speaker 1: and and I found a few coins that just opened
Speaker 1: up to it. Kind of Now, I I am very
Speaker 1: educated I was talking to our buddy today how he
Speaker 1: got Have you ever been scammed? Have I ever been scammed? Absolutely?
Speaker 1: But I'm trying to figure because I know what you're
Speaker 1: talking about. When it's just like a naked tells you
Speaker 1: something that got it? Internet bullshit? You what, what's the
Speaker 1: craziest I've been like, how about them little three things?
Speaker 1: And the guys to be doing with the three? I've
Speaker 1: never played it, but I've seen everybody get scamed by that,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? What's the three? I mean
Speaker 1: I've been scanned by jobs before. I remember, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: remember I went to this one job interview and it
Speaker 1: was just like, hey man, we want you to want
Speaker 1: yourself that cumes and I'm like, all right, cool, I'm
Speaker 1: funk with it. Then they're like, yeah, you're hired, and
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, I got the job. Cool that They're like,
Speaker 1: you get to buy the vacuum first. It's like, nigga, what, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you gotta buy the vacuum that you're going to show people.
Speaker 1: And that's how they get their money. They get you
Speaker 1: to think you got a job, you bought us three
Speaker 1: hundred dollar vacuum, and then they don't give a funk
Speaker 1: after that vacuum. Good for you. The early two thousand, man,
Speaker 1: early two thousand and they getting these stupid telemarketing job.
Speaker 1: We have to buy the stuff and then and then
Speaker 1: you know, other people, they don't care what happens is.
Speaker 1: They don't care if you do sell it, that's a plus.
Speaker 1: They just want the thirty people that came in for
Speaker 1: the audition to buy the vacuum. Ship. That's good money, man,
Speaker 1: That's that's great money. It's great money. Like it's if
Speaker 1: they do that and they get ten people to buy
Speaker 1: the vacuum, there's three thousand dollars. Their clue. They don't
Speaker 1: care what we do. So that I got scammed like
Speaker 1: that early when I was looking for jobs and ship,
Speaker 1: What were you looking for the jobs in Massachusetts. I've
Speaker 1: just been random in Massachusetts looking everywhere, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. It's kind of hard to find like a
Speaker 1: real job in massachusettscause everywhere everybody's a lawyer or a doctor. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well I grew up. I grew up fucking twenty minutes
Speaker 1: from Harvard University, five minute walk from m I T.
Speaker 1: So all these motherfucker's are graduating they live in my area.
Speaker 1: No diplomas got lost, nig and nothing got lost out
Speaker 1: there that you could have used it? Oh, my diploma?
Speaker 1: Not you're could have used somebody else's diploma that's graduated
Speaker 1: at Harvard, right, I mean he lives next to Harvard University.
Speaker 1: One of them idiot drunk college students was a drop
Speaker 1: of diploma the same name as him. There's no other
Speaker 1: read or not at all. No, a lot of browns
Speaker 1: not reado. Yeah, there's no other reado. That's another Chinese
Speaker 1: best friend, is it? No? There's Chinese Katy on Instagram
Speaker 1: that's always on top of me. What's the name? She's
Speaker 1: a only fans sporn star Chinese Kitti Chinese kitty, Yeah, kitty.
Speaker 1: How's it look? She looks like my sister subscribe, didn't
Speaker 1: change my name. I'm not subscribed, like I can't subscribe
Speaker 1: to any only fense. Yeah, that Shi took over the world. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they make more money than country. When one lady hears
Speaker 1: you made seven hundred thousand and one month. How do
Speaker 1: you feel about Bill Cosby may out? What do you
Speaker 1: think about it? Um? It's weird, man, it's a weird feeling.
Speaker 1: And I think if you know, if he did it.
Speaker 1: He shouldn't be out. He shouldn't be out at all.
Speaker 1: If he didn't do it, he should have never went in.
Speaker 1: You know. We it's like a fifty fifty some people.
Speaker 1: There's some people maybe a little bit higher than fifty,
Speaker 1: maybe seventy percent thing he did, thirty person thing you
Speaker 1: didn't do it. Yeah, and it sucks. It sucks too
Speaker 1: because I'm a comic. So I want to see the
Speaker 1: nigga be funny. You know, he's so funny to me
Speaker 1: that it's just like I I see everything that's going on,
Speaker 1: but I just look at him as Bill Cosby, the comedian,
Speaker 1: the actor. So when I go ahead, go ahead, when
Speaker 1: I like when I see him, it's like I want
Speaker 1: to see him say something funny. I don't want to
Speaker 1: see him defending himself or talking about the ship he
Speaker 1: don't want to talk about, Like I feel like he's
Speaker 1: holding in all the ship that he could be saying,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So, but they said though
Speaker 1: that he wants to go back and stand up. Michael Blocks,
Speaker 1: And you had Jay Leno open up for you the
Speaker 1: other day, would you like to Is it okay Bill
Speaker 1: Cosby opens up for you? Yeah? And I have an
Speaker 1: order full of video older as bitches that should have
Speaker 1: been dead from severy years ago. But I hear I
Speaker 1: haven't opened up for me, man, Yeah, you know it
Speaker 1: just that I like I have like Jerry Tall and
Speaker 1: puting juice with cocktails. I said, like then they getting
Speaker 1: the icy hot all that ship, A bunch of people
Speaker 1: with Mr Philio gonna be old. He like what is
Speaker 1: he like eight eight something? Yeah, this period, I mean,
Speaker 1: just to live that long and long and you know
Speaker 1: it's a blessing. I hope he he swears in his
Speaker 1: next comedy special. Oh yeah, he's gonna have to sweat now. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know he probably firstn't gonna be like funk everybody fu. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think I think I think we deserved that. He's
Speaker 1: went through enough to where we would understand if he's
Speaker 1: letting some ship out, like go ahead, event Bill, we
Speaker 1: get it, you know what I mean? And then you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes I walk you know something, and I remember they
Speaker 1: told him to listen, just just apologize and they would
Speaker 1: let you freeze like he refused to. Man, you know
Speaker 1: that that's crazy. That that's what makes me think that
Speaker 1: he didn't do it. Yeah, sometimes I think about that too,
Speaker 1: that you know he didn't, you know, because instead of
Speaker 1: just giving it and he figured maybe maybe if he
Speaker 1: was fifty years old, he probably whatever, like, no, I'm
Speaker 1: eighty three. Anyway, I'm gonna die soon. I'm not giving
Speaker 1: myself And know he maybe he didn't do it. Who knows.
Speaker 1: Nobody knows that. God knows. Guy's gonna judge him, gonna
Speaker 1: figure it out out, you know. You know, but then
Speaker 1: you don't want to You don't want to support some
Speaker 1: ship that's fucked up. Nobody does know what I mean.
Speaker 1: So with me, it's one of the things where I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna sit here and be like, oh, he didn't
Speaker 1: do it, because we don't know. But once the nigga
Speaker 1: goes to jail with then he lets him out and
Speaker 1: they're like, oh, we don't know what it's like. Come on, y'all,
Speaker 1: Like we don't know what to do. Like there's probably
Speaker 1: people that really want to go watch his show but
Speaker 1: aren't going to because it was going on, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, and then not show what's going on.
Speaker 1: So it's crazy because if he did that, that's totally wrong,
Speaker 1: you know, because he's a celebrity. You could get any
Speaker 1: pussy one. We don't have to, and you don't have
Speaker 1: to drug nobody, you know what I mean. Like, so
Speaker 1: if you're doing it, he was probably sucking bitches with
Speaker 1: a sweater on. That's why they didn't want to dick
Speaker 1: sweater Nig's dick. It's like they just don't want to
Speaker 1: be a brother of that sweater but hot and had
Speaker 1: a hot sweater on police after this happening, and they
Speaker 1: got written with the sweater man. But you know, Bill,
Speaker 1: which I wish him luck and I hope, you know,
Speaker 1: hopefully I'm gonna watch whatever he does. Yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: I just want, I want, I gotta watch it. I
Speaker 1: can't not watch what Bill Cobby does, you know, and
Speaker 1: all the ladies out there, I mean, and if he
Speaker 1: did do it, as I feel really bad for the
Speaker 1: ladies to have to go through that, you know. Um hey,
Speaker 1: you know, and because I was just watching that Jeff
Speaker 1: Epstein thing again, I've watched it before, watching it again,
Speaker 1: you know. But him, he was a sick man. He
Speaker 1: was just under age girls, and you should definitely, you know,
Speaker 1: spend your rest of your life in jail with all
Speaker 1: died already, you know, he's dead, he committed suicide. But
Speaker 1: my thing is like, goodness, just woman is growing at eighteen?
Speaker 1: Why can't you find eighteen? Your money is still young?
Speaker 1: You know, if you have so much money you want
Speaker 1: to suck a young woman any eighteen nineteen year old,
Speaker 1: you don't have to. You would not be putting yourself
Speaker 1: through that. You know, so like, I mean eighty woman,
Speaker 1: you know so many eighteen years if I like when
Speaker 1: young women, Okay, I'll just go for the eighteen year
Speaker 1: nineteen year old. Let me see I d fourteen years fifteen. Yes,
Speaker 1: motherfucker's man. I can't stand a sick person, you know
Speaker 1: at all. But it is funk all that. Let me see,
Speaker 1: Let's let's try to end the showing something fun and positive.
Speaker 1: I mean, we talked about Clamdia that was fun. Talked
Speaker 1: about your basketball games that was funny. Seven daughter that
Speaker 1: you organized five days before sell fourth daughter that nobody
Speaker 1: that leave at home with me. I have to like
Speaker 1: go to fucking Neptune to fund his motherfucker husband. Lisa
Speaker 1: Lesslie is available, Mike, she's married. I think Lisa's married. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's just happy, happily. Mary. And then Brittany Grinders she
Speaker 1: likes women. Yeah, Britney don't come. I try to try
Speaker 1: to try to get her Brittany one time, try to
Speaker 1: change it over, but she's that that's gonna be a
Speaker 1: lot of work. It's Brittany is a tough one. She's
Speaker 1: not like you know, she's like, you know, she would
Speaker 1: knock me out. Have you ever seen have you ever
Speaker 1: seen a girl that like that likes women? Switch over?
Speaker 1: What do you mean? Like? You know how you say
Speaker 1: you try to switch Brittany grinder over? Have you ever
Speaker 1: seen a woman switched over? Like you know, she likes women.
Speaker 1: She she's just a straight like dyke. And now she
Speaker 1: she's back to liking niggas again. Damn. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: think it happens. I think once they I think once
Speaker 1: they go over they stay over there. Yeah, it's no,
Speaker 1: it's the brain, something in the brain. Oh you think
Speaker 1: it's it's it's how they they're born that way. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I have you know, brothers and one brother one sister.
Speaker 1: That's a that's a yeah, she d here before, but
Speaker 1: she is she like tried because you know, the whole
Speaker 1: family always wants as she tried to be with a guy.
Speaker 1: She was with a guy, she was married to a guy.
Speaker 1: And she said so she was a female in a
Speaker 1: reagonship because we would with lesbians and she's a female.
Speaker 1: She's a female, she's a female. She would definitely go
Speaker 1: get some dick. Yeah, like is she not here before?
Speaker 1: She's pretty? I get what some dick if she needed it.
Speaker 1: She has a girlfriend. Now, that's her girlfriend, dressed like
Speaker 1: a guy. Like she she's kind of like a like
Speaker 1: a little bit manly, not like a dyke. But they
Speaker 1: they're more like girls. Can we say nicer words than dyke?
Speaker 1: It's it's a bad word. It's a strong woman, a
Speaker 1: strong woman of facially a woman of steroids, a kid.
Speaker 1: What the funker? I don't here's some woman that is
Speaker 1: not a butt word? All right, we'll find out when
Speaker 1: the cancer the show Chetni best friend, a Hansel woman
Speaker 1: is sucked up my hands? A woman just a woman
Speaker 1: that's funny top. Oh yeah, I've encountered them before the club.
Speaker 1: I think the woman like in a relationship. If it's
Speaker 1: like two pretty girls, they could go back and get dick. Yeah.
Speaker 1: It's the ones that are more than masculine ones that
Speaker 1: are not going back. They would rather sleep with a
Speaker 1: gay guy because they want to be They want to
Speaker 1: be tougher. Yeah. Yeah, the ones that look like many
Speaker 1: fresh never going back. Oh my god, the many fresh
Speaker 1: looking not going back, and those those those ones are tough. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they ain't working with us. You're getting a fight with them,
Speaker 1: ain't working with us at all. But they'll show up
Speaker 1: the court with a ponytail like a motherfucker on can
Speaker 1: be beat up by lesbian before. I don't know, I
Speaker 1: wish got in a fight with one. But like twelve
Speaker 1: years ago, what happened? You know, this girl invited me
Speaker 1: at a club and I was like, hey, what's up,
Speaker 1: you know, drinking, she was flirting, and then the girl
Speaker 1: boyfriend came. Boyfriend shoot my hand real hard. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: I was like tough black things, like, well you got
Speaker 1: a problem with me. It was so weird fight trying
Speaker 1: to fight with it, fucking that's my girl. I'm like what, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was really weird. I was like, I can't punch
Speaker 1: a girl. I was she'll probably knuck your as bigger
Speaker 1: dick than fuck you. So we're happy I didn't fight
Speaker 1: with just a little argument. Yeah it was an argument.
Speaker 1: It's like, dude, I didn't that girl anymore. It was
Speaker 1: very weird. Yeah, have you been fight with it. Nah. Never,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm cool with with with females that like females, man,
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't have no problem with nobody, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. So it's so it'd be it'd
Speaker 1: be cool. I've never tried to talk to a girl's
Speaker 1: girl either. Have you all been in the fight when
Speaker 1: the last time you had to fight? My last fight
Speaker 1: my my senior in high school. Damn okay, it's one
Speaker 1: of those. Yeah. After that, I was like, man, I
Speaker 1: can't be fighting no more. So what happened was like
Speaker 1: one of the fights like three pm outside mo, Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was. It was one of them. It was I
Speaker 1: was walking through the class and through school. He pushed me,
Speaker 1: he did me. We're fighting after school. We ended up
Speaker 1: just fighting after school my senior year. Beat that nigga's
Speaker 1: asking and that man, I never lost the fight, Like
Speaker 1: I know, I'm lying, I've been. I didn't want to
Speaker 1: fight one time and the nigga caught me. Now, he
Speaker 1: didn't sneak me. It was just like, man, I'm not
Speaker 1: trying to fight you when your school. And then Nigga
Speaker 1: still hit me and I was just like, oh I
Speaker 1: lost that fight. I chalked it up. Other than that,
Speaker 1: now I haven't lost. So we hit you, didn't do anything,
Speaker 1: fell on the ground, nigga, and then he walked away. No,
Speaker 1: it was it was in third grade. He hit me,
Speaker 1: fell down, and that was it. He threw like a
Speaker 1: like a surprise one. Yeah, it was. It wasn't even
Speaker 1: like a surprise one. It was just it was one
Speaker 1: of them like, hey, man, I don't want to fight you,
Speaker 1: and he was still wanted to go do it? Are
Speaker 1: you were you like short? I was always short, No, Mike.
Speaker 1: He was probably told back then, but everybody's third grade
Speaker 1: by the same height, man, I was told before. Everybody's
Speaker 1: the same height in the third grade, even Shaquille O'Neil
Speaker 1: and him, with the same height in the third grade,
Speaker 1: grew at like fourth grade. Probably, Yeah. Do you ever
Speaker 1: get your ever get the best of you? I got snuck.
Speaker 1: I never. I've never in a fight my um. When
Speaker 1: I first came to America, I lived in Newark, New Jersey.
Speaker 1: I went to this it was eighth grade or ninth grade.
Speaker 1: It was eighth grade going through the ninth It was
Speaker 1: a junior high school called Broadway Junior Hide and the
Speaker 1: dudes from the project. They found out everybody had good
Speaker 1: grades because where I'm where I'm from Africa, it's all
Speaker 1: about good grades is what we look forward to. We
Speaker 1: go to they find out everybody had good grades, and
Speaker 1: this this sucker punched them. Remember. Yeah, I'm sure if
Speaker 1: I was going on the bus or getting off the bus,
Speaker 1: but it's project dude, real dog dude just came and
Speaker 1: suck a punch me. Yeah. That's the only time. That's
Speaker 1: the only time my MoMA ever been in, um a fight.
Speaker 1: It wasn't a fighting, just I got stuck up. Damn.
Speaker 1: That's real crazy. What happened, Like, did you start getting
Speaker 1: hit me? No, I didn't. I transferred to another schemer. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm sure that guy is probably in jail right there
Speaker 1: getting raped by some punching little kids in the face.
Speaker 1: He's in jail, probably bent over right now. He probably
Speaker 1: turned to some um. Yeah. So besides that, Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: that's my um that's it. That's the only fight. That's
Speaker 1: the only closest thing. I did get punched by a woman.
Speaker 1: Grab when I was in I first came to America.
Speaker 1: You know, I was trying to fit in, right, I'm
Speaker 1: I've been in America a week a week a week.
Speaker 1: I'm like thirteen years old. I'm outside playing, you know,
Speaker 1: with the kids, you know, and it's one girl. I guess.
Speaker 1: They kept passing her shoes around. She's like getting my
Speaker 1: shoes passing, and they come to me, Why didn't I
Speaker 1: just get this bit her shoes back? But I passed
Speaker 1: it around. She punched me my stomach and I went down.
Speaker 1: I'm blocked. I've been hit by a woman before, but
Speaker 1: I couldn't hit a woman. You have been punching your
Speaker 1: stomach three years in American He was in America three
Speaker 1: three weeks. Stuff. It was a shot gun to me.
Speaker 1: He was not ready for that. I wasn't ready. You
Speaker 1: know what it was that I was the first one,
Speaker 1: and then you know I didn't. I wasn't on in school.
Speaker 1: I got slapped by a show that your summer camp
Speaker 1: for real, like slapped in the face, like like on something.
Speaker 1: She was like, was you talking to her? And I
Speaker 1: looked to the left, real quick boom to see who
Speaker 1: it was. Man, I looked back. She slapped the dog
Speaker 1: shit out of me. Damn slapped the dog. I was like, man, funk,
Speaker 1: that's what that feel like. Yeah, slapped a real good
Speaker 1: slap with her. Change your world from a girl, It'll
Speaker 1: change your world. It'll make me real like that. That's
Speaker 1: when I became a man. When she slapped the ship
Speaker 1: out of me, I just knew I was looking at
Speaker 1: the world wrong. I was looking at it like a kid.
Speaker 1: And I grew the funk up. I was like, this
Speaker 1: is reality. They're like, I can't cry, I can't do
Speaker 1: nothing but still him look like that nigger best friend.
Speaker 1: When I got punching these one million people, it's one
Speaker 1: million man. It was in the beach. It was like
Speaker 1: July fourth, my ex friend, though she was crazy. We
Speaker 1: all me beat up by womenhood what she punched you for.
Speaker 1: So what happened was I didn't invite her because she
Speaker 1: was crazy. July fourth, my whole family go there, what
Speaker 1: seven years ago? Yeah, so I didn't invite her. And
Speaker 1: then I was like, I kept the keys. I had
Speaker 1: three cars. I kept the key to the other car
Speaker 1: to make sure she doesn't go, you know, because we
Speaker 1: invited some girls over. You know, God damn it. I
Speaker 1: have like a Cadillac Coopie Bill candy paint unregistered. You know,
Speaker 1: I just kept it in the garage. Can you believe
Speaker 1: that fucking car was able to reach all the way
Speaker 1: to Molly? Oh. She she saw me talking to the
Speaker 1: girl Christian home right on the fucking nose, bleeding as fuck,
Speaker 1: and then she was screaming, she fuck you get the
Speaker 1: funk here, you know like that. So I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I went home. I told my mom, I gonna go
Speaker 1: home with a bloody nose. You, my brothers, my mom,
Speaker 1: everybody looked at like people. Everybody was drunk. I was like, fuck,
Speaker 1: you know, I was like, I went I went home.
Speaker 1: So I drove my car and I went home. And
Speaker 1: then I was like, you know what, I'll pick up
Speaker 1: that car tomorrow. It was told already, it was told
Speaker 1: told like had no registration, But I couldn't believe that
Speaker 1: car could reach all the way. She drove your cough,
Speaker 1: she yes, she drove the whole you know, the old ninety.
Speaker 1: That's a woman's intuition when she when a woman want
Speaker 1: to go somewhere, she gonna get there. Yeah, she's gonna
Speaker 1: get That happened to me. I had an ex, my
Speaker 1: ex girlfriend. She took the So I'm into my house
Speaker 1: in the East coast, right, I'm in a basement with
Speaker 1: this girl. This girl flew from Miami. The thing about it,
Speaker 1: my my ex was like Instagram detective, right, I think
Speaker 1: every girl, every girl's Instagram. So every whatever I was doing,
Speaker 1: she always following. Like she knew when I followed this
Speaker 1: particular girl, and when she knew I found a girl,
Speaker 1: she has about this bit, right, so she started following her. Right,
Speaker 1: this chick food on. It flew down and with my
Speaker 1: house in Delaware. My girl at that time, she was
Speaker 1: in l a. Right, So this girl made my basement.
Speaker 1: I got a movie theater east, we got basements, real
Speaker 1: big basement with big movie screen. She showing off, you know,
Speaker 1: because she lived in Miami. Miami, she's too expensive. You
Speaker 1: know that house is like so she's showing off and
Speaker 1: my girl like, oh this bitch and my nigga. My
Speaker 1: girl takes the Red Eye from Los Angeles, left like
Speaker 1: that night, landing into Philly like six am. Came to
Speaker 1: my house. She knew the coach to get in, got
Speaker 1: to my room, door, breaks the door down, like the
Speaker 1: incredible and I mean that was short. I didn't even
Speaker 1: fun the girl. And then what happened. She even brought
Speaker 1: her grandfriend. She's like she thought a grandfriend. That's why, Hey,
Speaker 1: hold on, her girl took the flight with her, took
Speaker 1: with your car and your miles are no, no, it
Speaker 1: wasn't no. Her girl came down and she was like
Speaker 1: since she got when she told her girl, hey, get up,
Speaker 1: I'm like, what are you gonna tea? And then I
Speaker 1: was scared. You know what I was scared. I guess
Speaker 1: what the funk? I did? Run down one motherfucker three
Speaker 1: you got not one one? For real? I died. Call
Speaker 1: the cops in that biting I co cops soon, like
Speaker 1: ninety times. I called the cops on her, and then
Speaker 1: I called the cops on her. She want to jail
Speaker 1: that night, but I still she want to jail that jame.
Speaker 1: And then she got out and I sucked us and
Speaker 1: went made up. Wait wait wait your girl? That you
Speaker 1: the girl I flew the other girl, the girl that
Speaker 1: flew out. I had my room manager to take up
Speaker 1: airport man, and then I had my you know it's
Speaker 1: my girl came you know were you guys made up?
Speaker 1: We went on makeup sex, be too good man, especially
Speaker 1: over that flight. Yeah, my ex girlfriend she went it up,
Speaker 1: going to the seventy hour old for mental illness, she
Speaker 1: would Yeah. Yeah, so the story of my life. Man.
Speaker 1: I had a lot of crazy women in my life, man,
Speaker 1: lots of crazy women. What's about the rest? In another
Speaker 1: show man here? But thanks for joining man, Thank you
Speaker 1: for having me, Rito Brown, give me your Instagram. You
Speaker 1: can follow up Rito Brown on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, to
Speaker 1: publics R E E d O Brown as in like
Speaker 1: the color brown. Y'all should know that, follow me on
Speaker 1: everything man. Salute to Mike and his Chinese friend for
Speaker 1: this dopeast show man. It was fun, bro. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: learned a lot. What you learned? I learned. Uh. If
Speaker 1: you decide to have three something of your planet five
Speaker 1: days before, three sis three days before four or sings
Speaker 1: four days and then get some well you need you
Speaker 1: probably need longer because you have to everybody has to
Speaker 1: get tested and all that if you're gonna be wilding up.
Speaker 1: But if now you just have me switching to come back,
Speaker 1: thank you for joining us. We'll see another episode. Mother
Speaker 1: second podcast, The Mother Suck a podcast with Me Came Black.
Speaker 1: It's a cavalry audio production brought to you by All
Speaker 1: Heart Radio and The Black Effect Podcast Network, produced by
Speaker 1: Brendan morgan Off. Calvary Audio and A King for The
Speaker 1: Black Effect. Associate producer is Jeff Apple. Executive produced by
Speaker 1: Michael Blackson, Keegan Rosenberger and Dana Brunetti.