WEBVTT - That Tracks

0:00:00.760 --> 0:00:05.000
<v Speaker 1>Scrubbing In with Becca Tilly and Tanya rap An iHeartRadio podcast.

0:00:09.200 --> 0:00:12.639
<v Speaker 2>Hello, everybody, we are scrubbing in.

0:00:14.000 --> 0:00:14.920
<v Speaker 3>It's been a minute.

0:00:15.120 --> 0:00:18.200
<v Speaker 2>It has been a minute because we did pre recorded

0:00:18.280 --> 0:00:24.239
<v Speaker 2>shows and this is an actual Monday fun day.

0:00:24.440 --> 0:00:26.360
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, afreshy as they say.

0:00:27.200 --> 0:00:30.560
<v Speaker 2>I don't know who says that, but somebody.

0:00:30.240 --> 0:00:33.080
<v Speaker 1>Referenced the term for oh it's Teddy Mellencamp. Oh, but

0:00:33.159 --> 0:00:35.120
<v Speaker 1>it was something totally different. But she called him ssh

0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:38.199
<v Speaker 1>and I was like, I like that term. Okay, so

0:00:38.280 --> 0:00:40.159
<v Speaker 1>we'll adopt that for today.

0:00:41.080 --> 0:00:44.159
<v Speaker 3>Another thing that I learned over the weekend is it tracks.

0:00:45.920 --> 0:00:47.680
<v Speaker 2>That's like if something makes sense at tracks.

0:00:47.800 --> 0:00:49.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's something the kids are saying these days.

0:00:49.880 --> 0:00:51.640
<v Speaker 2>I feel that's been around for a minute.

0:00:51.680 --> 0:00:54.720
<v Speaker 1>Oh really, Yeah, that's not new. Uh huh, it's new

0:00:54.760 --> 0:00:58.160
<v Speaker 1>to me. That's good though. Yeah, you start hearing me

0:00:58.200 --> 0:00:59.160
<v Speaker 1>say that that.

0:01:00.160 --> 0:01:03.640
<v Speaker 2>They say, one man's trash is another man's treasure. Yeah.

0:01:04.200 --> 0:01:06.000
<v Speaker 3>Are you doing I'm doing good? How are you?

0:01:06.319 --> 0:01:06.800
<v Speaker 2>I'm good?

0:01:06.920 --> 0:01:08.320
<v Speaker 3>You just got home yesterday?

0:01:08.480 --> 0:01:10.280
<v Speaker 2>I did. I spent a full week in New York.

0:01:10.280 --> 0:01:12.119
<v Speaker 2>I don't think I've ever done that. I think that's

0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:15.880
<v Speaker 2>the longest I've ever been strictly in the city of

0:01:15.880 --> 0:01:16.480
<v Speaker 2>New York.

0:01:16.319 --> 0:01:18.200
<v Speaker 3>And you and Haley are no longer long distance.

0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:21.080
<v Speaker 2>She landed like twenty minutes ago.

0:01:21.280 --> 0:01:21.760
<v Speaker 4>Wow.

0:01:21.920 --> 0:01:29.960
<v Speaker 2>God, it was rocky. It wasn't perfect, but we did it. Yeah.

0:01:30.160 --> 0:01:33.720
<v Speaker 1>You know they say that the only way through, No,

0:01:33.880 --> 0:01:36.080
<v Speaker 1>the only way out, the only way out through.

0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:38.720
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, thank you. We got there. Yeah, and you went

0:01:38.760 --> 0:01:39.160
<v Speaker 3>through it.

0:01:39.400 --> 0:01:39.680
<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

0:01:39.800 --> 0:01:42.320
<v Speaker 3>It was not easy. No, it was not a straight path.

0:01:42.440 --> 0:01:43.119
<v Speaker 2>It sure wasn't.

0:01:43.200 --> 0:01:43.560
<v Speaker 3>It was not.

0:01:43.840 --> 0:01:46.199
<v Speaker 1>It was quite a windy path. Uh, ups and down,

0:01:46.800 --> 0:01:47.640
<v Speaker 1>peaks and valleys.

0:01:47.680 --> 0:01:50.760
<v Speaker 3>Yes, and we're here, we're here at the finish line.

0:01:50.960 --> 0:01:53.000
<v Speaker 2>The finish line you went through I did.

0:01:53.120 --> 0:01:54.160
<v Speaker 3>Are you proud of yourself?

0:01:54.960 --> 0:01:58.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? I would like to have handled some moments better,

0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:01.160
<v Speaker 2>but all in oh yeah, I'm proud of myself. I'm

0:02:01.160 --> 0:02:03.400
<v Speaker 2>proud of both of us because she, uh, while I

0:02:03.480 --> 0:02:05.720
<v Speaker 2>was going through it also meant she was going through it,

0:02:06.520 --> 0:02:10.959
<v Speaker 2>wow on tour. So we did it and she's back

0:02:11.520 --> 0:02:16.320
<v Speaker 2>and now she'll probably have like post tour blues, you know. Yeah, yeah,

0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:18.359
<v Speaker 2>like the come down because like you're on stage every

0:02:18.440 --> 0:02:20.880
<v Speaker 2>night with people literally chanting your name.

0:02:21.440 --> 0:02:24.280
<v Speaker 3>Right, and then she comes home and you're like.

0:02:26.360 --> 0:02:29.440
<v Speaker 2>I don't speak like that, nor do I say that

0:02:30.880 --> 0:02:33.400
<v Speaker 2>but like maybe Phoebe and I can just like imitate

0:02:33.400 --> 0:02:37.440
<v Speaker 2>an audience till she like fully comes down, you know. Yeah.

0:02:37.480 --> 0:02:40.040
<v Speaker 2>So I speaking of Phoebe. I so I was gone

0:02:40.040 --> 0:02:42.560
<v Speaker 2>for a week and I go to pick her up.

0:02:43.120 --> 0:02:45.079
<v Speaker 2>She goes and hides under the bed like she did

0:02:45.120 --> 0:02:48.000
<v Speaker 2>not want to leave, which is comforting in the fact

0:02:48.000 --> 0:02:50.760
<v Speaker 2>that she loves it there. She loves it there. Yeah,

0:02:50.760 --> 0:02:54.640
<v Speaker 2>but also like, damn, that's tough.

0:02:54.720 --> 0:02:55.919
<v Speaker 3>You know, it's tough.

0:02:56.200 --> 0:03:01.639
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I've been processing that a lot as well. I've

0:03:01.639 --> 0:03:03.720
<v Speaker 2>moved up from the Haley stuff and now I'm focusing

0:03:03.720 --> 0:03:04.880
<v Speaker 2>on the rejection from Phoebe.

0:03:05.080 --> 0:03:07.360
<v Speaker 3>So it's funny because it happens to me.

0:03:07.400 --> 0:03:09.360
<v Speaker 1>But the reverse, like when I leave Sonny, when I

0:03:09.440 --> 0:03:12.400
<v Speaker 1>leave her, I wish she was more sad to see

0:03:12.400 --> 0:03:14.120
<v Speaker 1>me go, you know, like she could care less. But

0:03:14.160 --> 0:03:16.200
<v Speaker 1>when I come home together her, when I come back together,

0:03:16.480 --> 0:03:17.680
<v Speaker 1>she's really excited. You Know.

0:03:17.720 --> 0:03:21.280
<v Speaker 2>What I think happened is that Brooks Alley's dog was there,

0:03:21.480 --> 0:03:24.200
<v Speaker 2>and he is like obsessed with me, so he came

0:03:24.280 --> 0:03:25.960
<v Speaker 2>up to me first. I was petting him when she

0:03:26.040 --> 0:03:29.000
<v Speaker 2>came up, and I think she kind of got like jealous. Yeah,

0:03:29.040 --> 0:03:32.680
<v Speaker 2>like you're gonna acknowledge him first. Yeah, I'd be the same.

0:03:33.240 --> 0:03:35.520
<v Speaker 2>She's a little bit like me, so much like you.

0:03:35.800 --> 0:03:38.960
<v Speaker 1>It's so the fact that our dogs are quite literally

0:03:39.000 --> 0:03:42.280
<v Speaker 1>the doppelgangers of our own personalities.

0:03:42.000 --> 0:03:43.160
<v Speaker 3>Is pretty wild.

0:03:43.200 --> 0:03:43.440
<v Speaker 5>It is.

0:03:43.480 --> 0:03:46.240
<v Speaker 2>It's pretty good. Yeah, But New York's so fun. There's

0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:48.760
<v Speaker 2>such a fun energy there that like you don't really

0:03:48.760 --> 0:03:51.480
<v Speaker 2>find anywhere else. Do you feel that way? So?

0:03:51.960 --> 0:03:54.080
<v Speaker 1>Uh, yeah, I get what you're saying in terms of

0:03:54.120 --> 0:03:57.480
<v Speaker 1>like the buzz, but like, don't you feel tired there?

0:03:57.680 --> 0:03:59.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. I one of the

0:03:59.680 --> 0:04:05.680
<v Speaker 2>nights we so so Hailey was there Sunday or Monday

0:04:05.720 --> 0:04:08.120
<v Speaker 2>to Wednesday, and then she went on to finish the

0:04:08.160 --> 0:04:10.800
<v Speaker 2>tour and then I hadn't booked my flight back yet,

0:04:12.680 --> 0:04:14.760
<v Speaker 2>and it was Wednesday night at Hailey show, and I

0:04:14.800 --> 0:04:16.760
<v Speaker 2>was talking to Marla and she ended up getting a

0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:19.520
<v Speaker 2>job that was in New York on like Tuesday, and

0:04:19.560 --> 0:04:21.159
<v Speaker 2>so she was like, oh my gosh, do I just

0:04:21.200 --> 0:04:23.039
<v Speaker 2>stay here or do I like go all the way

0:04:23.040 --> 0:04:25.240
<v Speaker 2>back to LA and then fly out again. And I

0:04:25.279 --> 0:04:27.040
<v Speaker 2>was like, well, I haven't booked a flight yet, so

0:04:27.400 --> 0:04:30.240
<v Speaker 2>I'm down to hang for the weekend if you want to,

0:04:30.440 --> 0:04:32.120
<v Speaker 2>And so we just decided to do it. And it

0:04:32.160 --> 0:04:35.479
<v Speaker 2>was so fun and it was fun to not have

0:04:35.680 --> 0:04:37.880
<v Speaker 2>I was telling Hanah, like to not have a schedule

0:04:38.440 --> 0:04:40.800
<v Speaker 2>of things to do. It was like we just did whatever.

0:04:40.839 --> 0:04:42.240
<v Speaker 2>So like one night we went out and we were

0:04:42.320 --> 0:04:43.960
<v Speaker 2>up like super late, and then the next night we

0:04:44.000 --> 0:04:46.480
<v Speaker 2>stayed in the room and benched a show and took

0:04:46.520 --> 0:04:48.320
<v Speaker 2>an edible and ordered pizza.

0:04:48.960 --> 0:04:50.440
<v Speaker 3>That is fun because I feel like every time I

0:04:50.480 --> 0:04:51.320
<v Speaker 3>go to New York, I a.

0:04:52.600 --> 0:04:57.200
<v Speaker 2>Ohays so but Hailey. So, Hailey's book came out, Girls

0:04:57.240 --> 0:04:58.520
<v Speaker 2>Like Girls everyone.

0:05:00.040 --> 0:05:02.280
<v Speaker 3>I got my copy in the mail, I got the.

0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:04.760
<v Speaker 2>Five copies I ordered. I have the Sunshine mine and

0:05:04.760 --> 0:05:09.640
<v Speaker 2>Girls Like Girls just like stacks of them. And then

0:05:10.200 --> 0:05:12.440
<v Speaker 2>so she went on Good Morning America, which was really cool.

0:05:12.480 --> 0:05:15.680
<v Speaker 2>And then that was a very early morning as you know,

0:05:16.279 --> 0:05:17.520
<v Speaker 2>as a fellow author.

0:05:17.560 --> 0:05:19.799
<v Speaker 3>A fellow author, Yeah, I know the grind.

0:05:20.000 --> 0:05:22.640
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like everyone around me is just like authors,

0:05:22.839 --> 0:05:28.120
<v Speaker 2>and it's so casual, you know, just drop breasts. Yeah,

0:05:28.200 --> 0:05:29.440
<v Speaker 2>dropping books left and right.

0:05:29.520 --> 0:05:33.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you know, other people are dropping babies. We're dropping books.

0:05:33.680 --> 0:05:37.080
<v Speaker 1>I said, weird, y'all are dropping books. And then she

0:05:37.120 --> 0:05:41.560
<v Speaker 1>had two shows that were in uh, New York, she

0:05:41.640 --> 0:05:44.000
<v Speaker 1>sold out Irving Plaza two nights in a row, which

0:05:44.000 --> 0:05:44.839
<v Speaker 1>is really cool.

0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:48.120
<v Speaker 2>And then it was really fun. I had a great time.

0:05:48.160 --> 0:05:51.040
<v Speaker 2>And then I did a shoot. I did a magazine shoot.

0:05:51.320 --> 0:05:52.919
<v Speaker 2>I don't know how much I can talk about it,

0:05:52.920 --> 0:06:02.279
<v Speaker 2>but it's for Pride, Happy Pride Month, everybody, everybody. So yeah,

0:06:02.279 --> 0:06:05.479
<v Speaker 2>it was really fun and I'm I feel fine, not

0:06:05.640 --> 0:06:08.039
<v Speaker 2>exhausted as I normally do. From New York.

0:06:08.200 --> 0:06:10.320
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, wow, what'd you do?

0:06:11.560 --> 0:06:15.719
<v Speaker 2>So I went to Austin, Yeah, which I there.

0:06:15.800 --> 0:06:17.520
<v Speaker 1>I just have so many things to say, Like, I

0:06:17.520 --> 0:06:19.760
<v Speaker 1>have so many thoughts and so many things going on.

0:06:21.320 --> 0:06:24.039
<v Speaker 1>First of all, I always forget how much I enjoy

0:06:24.120 --> 0:06:25.000
<v Speaker 1>Teddy Mellencamp.

0:06:25.839 --> 0:06:29.440
<v Speaker 2>She's hilariously enjoyable to be around.

0:06:29.640 --> 0:06:31.960
<v Speaker 1>She really is, like there's always something coming out of

0:06:31.960 --> 0:06:33.680
<v Speaker 1>her mouth that just like makes me laugh.

0:06:34.000 --> 0:06:35.320
<v Speaker 3>And so I spent.

0:06:35.839 --> 0:06:37.560
<v Speaker 1>I mean it was only in Austin for twenty four hours,

0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:39.760
<v Speaker 1>but I spent, like I went. We went back after dinner,

0:06:39.800 --> 0:06:41.760
<v Speaker 1>We went back into Teddy's room and I just stayed

0:06:41.760 --> 0:06:44.359
<v Speaker 1>in there for like two and a half hours, just talking.

0:06:44.680 --> 0:06:46.880
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, just till the wee hours of the morning.

0:06:47.320 --> 0:06:48.600
<v Speaker 5>And that's where Freshy came up.

0:06:48.720 --> 0:06:49.719
<v Speaker 3>That's where fresh she came up.

0:06:49.800 --> 0:06:53.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but the hotel that we were staying in was haunted,

0:06:53.920 --> 0:06:56.000
<v Speaker 1>so like none of us wanted to go to bed,

0:06:56.560 --> 0:06:58.159
<v Speaker 1>which is why I think we all stayed up till

0:06:59.120 --> 0:07:00.320
<v Speaker 1>the wee hours of the morning.

0:07:00.600 --> 0:07:02.000
<v Speaker 3>But yeah, the hotel was haunted.

0:07:02.120 --> 0:07:03.039
<v Speaker 2>Who found out?

0:07:03.520 --> 0:07:08.000
<v Speaker 3>Uh, I don't know. I think maybe Tara figured it out.

0:07:08.480 --> 0:07:11.360
<v Speaker 1>But it's like famously known, Like it's like there's articles

0:07:11.400 --> 0:07:16.320
<v Speaker 1>online about how haunted this hotel is. I know, when

0:07:16.320 --> 0:07:18.800
<v Speaker 1>you walk in, you do not get warm, cozy vibes

0:07:18.800 --> 0:07:21.240
<v Speaker 1>at all. So I was already thrown off by the hotel,

0:07:21.360 --> 0:07:22.800
<v Speaker 1>and then when they told me it was haunted, I

0:07:22.840 --> 0:07:24.440
<v Speaker 1>was like, I'm done, Like I'm done, I'm not going

0:07:24.480 --> 0:07:25.080
<v Speaker 1>to sleep tonight.

0:07:25.120 --> 0:07:25.600
<v Speaker 3>It's fine.

0:07:26.560 --> 0:07:29.320
<v Speaker 6>So I think I guarantee you it's the power of suggestion.

0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:31.160
<v Speaker 6>For sure, I guarantee you. I would have stopped like

0:07:31.200 --> 0:07:33.960
<v Speaker 6>a baby in that hotel. I don't know what.

0:07:34.080 --> 0:07:36.240
<v Speaker 3>Baby as well.

0:07:36.280 --> 0:07:44.320
<v Speaker 2>It was just yeah, yeah, the stinch problem is haunted

0:07:44.440 --> 0:07:46.600
<v Speaker 2>or just like a bad suit. But you're so right.

0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:48.800
<v Speaker 1>If I didn't know it was haunted, I probably would

0:07:48.840 --> 0:07:50.960
<v Speaker 1>have been fine. But because I knew that it was,

0:07:51.080 --> 0:07:51.840
<v Speaker 1>I was just kind of.

0:07:51.800 --> 0:07:53.880
<v Speaker 5>Like on it, or if you didn't believe in that stuff.

0:07:53.920 --> 0:07:54.680
<v Speaker 3>I don't believe in that.

0:07:54.680 --> 0:07:55.320
<v Speaker 5>You clearly do.

0:07:55.520 --> 0:07:57.600
<v Speaker 6>If you can't sleep because of the suggestion that there's

0:07:57.640 --> 0:07:58.920
<v Speaker 6>a ghost watching you.

0:07:58.640 --> 0:08:00.400
<v Speaker 3>No, and then this is the best thing. So do

0:08:00.400 --> 0:08:01.760
<v Speaker 3>you know Christine Taylor is.

0:08:02.760 --> 0:08:04.200
<v Speaker 2>From Yeah, Ben Stiller's X.

0:08:04.360 --> 0:08:06.880
<v Speaker 3>Yes, well and Current they got back together.

0:08:06.920 --> 0:08:08.200
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, good for them.

0:08:08.720 --> 0:08:11.760
<v Speaker 3>But I I'm not sure how long.

0:08:12.800 --> 0:08:14.560
<v Speaker 5>Recent they separated.

0:08:14.600 --> 0:08:16.360
<v Speaker 3>For a while, they separated, but they never divorced.

0:08:16.400 --> 0:08:18.640
<v Speaker 2>I think I had like a she has like Jennifer

0:08:18.640 --> 0:08:19.920
<v Speaker 2>Anniston vibes.

0:08:20.080 --> 0:08:24.400
<v Speaker 1>Yes, okay, she is so lovely in person. I could

0:08:24.480 --> 0:08:27.800
<v Speaker 1>not get over it. So Ashley, I spills like an

0:08:28.040 --> 0:08:31.720
<v Speaker 1>entire cup, like this big of coffee just straight up

0:08:31.760 --> 0:08:34.400
<v Speaker 1>into her bag and it was a really nice bag,

0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:37.040
<v Speaker 1>like a really nice bag, and just got everything in there,

0:08:37.080 --> 0:08:40.600
<v Speaker 1>just drenched, and like you know, like when something like

0:08:40.600 --> 0:08:42.920
<v Speaker 1>happens like that, you can feel the person that like

0:08:43.360 --> 0:08:45.439
<v Speaker 1>build on gets tense, but they're like, you know, playing

0:08:45.440 --> 0:08:48.080
<v Speaker 1>it off, like it's okay, it's okay. She literally could

0:08:48.080 --> 0:08:50.720
<v Speaker 1>not have cared less, like could not have cared less.

0:08:50.720 --> 0:08:53.000
<v Speaker 1>It's spilled on her dress, it's stilled everywhere. She's just

0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:55.400
<v Speaker 1>wiping it down. I was like, it's that's all good,

0:08:55.520 --> 0:08:59.319
<v Speaker 1>no problem. Ashley was like mortified. I thought Ashley was dying,

0:09:00.640 --> 0:09:02.440
<v Speaker 1>but it was. She was so cool and I was

0:09:02.520 --> 0:09:06.520
<v Speaker 1>just like wow, I really was impressed by her just

0:09:06.559 --> 0:09:07.040
<v Speaker 1>in general.

0:09:07.080 --> 0:09:08.200
<v Speaker 3>I really really liked her.

0:09:08.520 --> 0:09:10.239
<v Speaker 2>Great, shall we have her on the podcast?

0:09:10.600 --> 0:09:11.880
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, well we could get her.

0:09:12.320 --> 0:09:14.400
<v Speaker 2>She hosts one of our podcasts, right, that's what she

0:09:14.600 --> 0:09:17.240
<v Speaker 2>loved to have her. I feel like she was in

0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:18.640
<v Speaker 2>the Brady Bunch, right, yeah.

0:09:18.559 --> 0:09:19.679
<v Speaker 3>She was Marsha Brady.

0:09:19.880 --> 0:09:24.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Yeah that's great news. Yeah that tracks right, yeah,

0:09:24.559 --> 0:09:25.240
<v Speaker 2>that does track.

0:09:25.320 --> 0:09:28.400
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that tracks, good job, Tanya, Yeah, in tracks.

0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:32.120
<v Speaker 1>But so I really enjoyed her, and I mean everybody

0:09:32.120 --> 0:09:33.640
<v Speaker 1>there and got to see Ben, So it was fun.

0:09:33.640 --> 0:09:35.360
<v Speaker 3>It was like fun to be in Austin.

0:09:35.440 --> 0:09:38.480
<v Speaker 1>But it was weird because I wasn't there with Becca,

0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:42.400
<v Speaker 1>and like, uh, I equate it to kind of like

0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:45.480
<v Speaker 1>high school or like everybody has their kind of like clicks,

0:09:45.520 --> 0:09:47.400
<v Speaker 1>you know, because everybody was there with their podcast partner,

0:09:47.480 --> 0:09:50.400
<v Speaker 1>so it was like they had their podcast partner with them,

0:09:51.480 --> 0:09:54.120
<v Speaker 1>and then Teddy had Jenny Jenny Garth who does Nino too,

0:09:54.120 --> 0:09:56.480
<v Speaker 1>and om Gene, so like they had like their little

0:09:56.480 --> 0:09:57.800
<v Speaker 1>they were going to dinner, the two of them, and

0:09:57.840 --> 0:10:00.160
<v Speaker 1>I was like, I don't have my partner here. It

0:10:00.200 --> 0:10:02.439
<v Speaker 1>was kind of I felt really like fish out of

0:10:02.480 --> 0:10:04.680
<v Speaker 1>water for a minute. Like I was like, Becca, it's

0:10:04.840 --> 0:10:06.520
<v Speaker 1>weird being here without you.

0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:08.199
<v Speaker 2>I didn't even know it was a thing.

0:10:08.520 --> 0:10:10.480
<v Speaker 3>Well because I wasn't on the panel, so it wasn't

0:10:10.520 --> 0:10:13.240
<v Speaker 3>like it wasn't a part of it. I was just moderating.

0:10:13.520 --> 0:10:15.760
<v Speaker 2>Well, yeah, she text me and she's like, everyone's going

0:10:15.760 --> 0:10:19.120
<v Speaker 2>to dinner and everyone separated. I'm like, you literally are

0:10:19.160 --> 0:10:21.600
<v Speaker 2>friends with all of these people, like just be like, hey,

0:10:21.760 --> 0:10:23.960
<v Speaker 2>can you fit one more?

0:10:24.120 --> 0:10:26.080
<v Speaker 3>So everybody did invite me, that's the thing, Like I

0:10:26.080 --> 0:10:26.800
<v Speaker 3>had to invite you.

0:10:27.320 --> 0:10:28.360
<v Speaker 2>It was just a pity party.

0:10:28.960 --> 0:10:31.360
<v Speaker 3>Yeah yeah. I was like, but like Beca's not here,

0:10:31.440 --> 0:10:33.000
<v Speaker 3>and like I don't have my person.

0:10:32.720 --> 0:10:34.440
<v Speaker 2>Here with your security blanket.

0:10:34.679 --> 0:10:35.760
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it was weird.

0:10:35.840 --> 0:10:38.040
<v Speaker 2>I get that sometimes, going to those things without like

0:10:38.080 --> 0:10:40.080
<v Speaker 2>the like when you're a person.

0:10:40.200 --> 0:10:41.960
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get that.

0:10:42.400 --> 0:10:44.280
<v Speaker 2>Well, thanks for missing me. I just nice to be

0:10:44.280 --> 0:10:46.439
<v Speaker 2>missed because Phoebe didn't. And yeah, well.

0:10:46.360 --> 0:10:49.160
<v Speaker 3>Yeah Phoebe did not miss you, but I certainly did.

0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:52.920
<v Speaker 2>I really appreciate that. How was the arcade with the fan.

0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:56.079
<v Speaker 2>I was like dying laughing at Robbie's story of you

0:10:56.200 --> 0:10:57.880
<v Speaker 2>doing the VHR was a VHR.

0:10:58.160 --> 0:10:59.480
<v Speaker 3>It's like VR VR.

0:10:59.360 --> 0:11:05.480
<v Speaker 2>VR, yeah, vhs bom that tracks.

0:11:05.640 --> 0:11:10.440
<v Speaker 3>I'm okay. So I've never done VR like that before.

0:11:11.360 --> 0:11:14.680
<v Speaker 1>So I didn't realize that I was in a room

0:11:15.040 --> 0:11:17.680
<v Speaker 1>with just like it was just a room with plexiglass.

0:11:17.760 --> 0:11:20.280
<v Speaker 1>I was doing this maze and so when this monster

0:11:20.400 --> 0:11:23.040
<v Speaker 1>came out and attacked me, I was like kneeling down

0:11:23.040 --> 0:11:24.120
<v Speaker 1>because I didn't want to hit me.

0:11:24.240 --> 0:11:24.880
<v Speaker 3>Like I didn't know.

0:11:24.920 --> 0:11:27.000
<v Speaker 1>I didn't realize. And also I had headphones and so

0:11:27.000 --> 0:11:29.360
<v Speaker 1>I couldn't hear that. They were like literally right there

0:11:29.400 --> 0:11:31.880
<v Speaker 1>like robbing. The kids are there laughing hysterically at me,

0:11:32.320 --> 0:11:34.480
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like dodging this thing hitting me and like

0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:35.760
<v Speaker 1>trying to shoot it and stuff.

0:11:35.800 --> 0:11:38.920
<v Speaker 2>It was actually really fun. I've never done it before.

0:11:38.960 --> 0:11:41.360
<v Speaker 1>But Haley, first of all, you would love the place

0:11:41.360 --> 0:11:44.959
<v Speaker 1>that we went to. Yeah, I mean two Bit Circus.

0:11:44.960 --> 0:11:47.920
<v Speaker 1>It's in downtown LA and it's just like a giant arcade.

0:11:47.960 --> 0:11:51.160
<v Speaker 1>So there's like arcades and or it's like games like

0:11:51.200 --> 0:11:52.640
<v Speaker 1>you know, pac Man, and they have like all like

0:11:52.640 --> 0:11:53.720
<v Speaker 1>the ski ball and stuff.

0:11:53.720 --> 0:11:55.319
<v Speaker 2>They all this They have like Papa shot.

0:11:55.920 --> 0:11:58.040
<v Speaker 1>Yes, they have all that stuff, and then they had

0:11:58.080 --> 0:11:59.920
<v Speaker 1>those VR things. They had things that you could like

0:12:00.080 --> 0:12:01.640
<v Speaker 1>fly wow.

0:12:01.880 --> 0:12:05.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that was like my go to whenever I was dating.

0:12:05.320 --> 0:12:07.400
<v Speaker 2>We would, I would I would talk about that. That

0:12:07.520 --> 0:12:10.439
<v Speaker 2>was like a skill that I had. Yeah, like Papa shot,

0:12:10.720 --> 0:12:14.280
<v Speaker 2>quick shot basketball thing at arcades and then obviously guys

0:12:14.320 --> 0:12:16.480
<v Speaker 2>would be like, Okay, let's let's go to the arcade,

0:12:17.040 --> 0:12:20.280
<v Speaker 2>and I would dominate. Actually, I need your help.

0:12:20.320 --> 0:12:21.679
<v Speaker 3>I don't know if you can tell that my nails

0:12:21.679 --> 0:12:22.160
<v Speaker 3>are broken.

0:12:22.400 --> 0:12:24.240
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, they are one of them.

0:12:24.320 --> 0:12:24.880
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:12:24.920 --> 0:12:28.240
<v Speaker 1>So Robbie's kids are really into basketball right now. Okay,

0:12:28.280 --> 0:12:29.760
<v Speaker 1>and that's all we're playing lately.

0:12:29.920 --> 0:12:33.600
<v Speaker 2>Oh do you need some skills? I would like some practice. Yeah,

0:12:33.640 --> 0:12:36.840
<v Speaker 2>I'd like to be better, Tanya. What if we document,

0:12:37.040 --> 0:12:39.719
<v Speaker 2>like we do a series where we're like secretly practicing

0:12:39.720 --> 0:12:42.640
<v Speaker 2>and then we all go play and you like crush it.

0:12:43.000 --> 0:12:46.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, because I'm not bad. Surprisingly, I'm not terrible.

0:12:47.120 --> 0:12:50.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you're weirdly. You have some athletic ability that comes

0:12:50.600 --> 0:12:51.000
<v Speaker 2>out in.

0:12:51.000 --> 0:12:55.439
<v Speaker 1>Weird like athletic adjacent Yes, yeah, like I wouldn't say

0:12:55.440 --> 0:12:57.320
<v Speaker 1>an athletic, but I'm like almost there.

0:12:57.440 --> 0:12:57.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:12:57.720 --> 0:12:59.520
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, And so I want to.

0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:03.160
<v Speaker 1>I want to be a better teammate for the like

0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:05.400
<v Speaker 1>the kid that the team that I'm on, you know,

0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:08.640
<v Speaker 1>because Robbie is obviously really good and so they're always winning.

0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:10.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we gotta get to Yeah.

0:13:10.960 --> 0:13:12.600
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's I'm gonna shorten my nails.

0:13:12.760 --> 0:13:16.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, step, it's hard to shoot with long nails.

0:13:16.160 --> 0:13:18.280
<v Speaker 1>What I realize is when I'm blocking is when they

0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:20.120
<v Speaker 1>break because I'm I'm good at defense.

0:13:21.240 --> 0:13:24.240
<v Speaker 2>You just blocking like that? Yeah yeah, regarding the children

0:13:24.360 --> 0:13:30.640
<v Speaker 2>or yeah.

0:13:30.679 --> 0:13:32.000
<v Speaker 3>So anyways, I need your help.

0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:35.120
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I'm so down for this. Yeah. I would love

0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:37.359
<v Speaker 2>to give like lessons practice.

0:13:37.679 --> 0:13:39.440
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so come over because we've got the hoop now.

0:13:39.720 --> 0:13:40.960
<v Speaker 2>Oh great, I have a hoop too.

0:13:41.080 --> 0:13:42.000
<v Speaker 3>Oh wow.

0:13:42.400 --> 0:13:45.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so we can prop it up.

0:13:45.679 --> 0:13:49.760
<v Speaker 3>Hoop and have summer twenty twenty three. They're not ready, No, no, no.

0:13:50.360 --> 0:13:51.600
<v Speaker 2>Should we take a break.

0:13:51.800 --> 0:13:55.880
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, to discuss we miss the Taylor Swift stuff. What

0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:56.960
<v Speaker 3>the new songs?

0:13:57.480 --> 0:14:01.120
<v Speaker 1>Oh my, because we were we were pre recorded that episode.

0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:23.560
<v Speaker 2>We'll be right back with that. We're back, okay. So

0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:30.720
<v Speaker 2>right after we recorded the podcast, Taylor dropped some what

0:14:30.880 --> 0:14:34.440
<v Speaker 2>it was like an extended version of the deluxe album. Yeah.

0:14:34.520 --> 0:14:37.960
<v Speaker 1>What I realized is hits different is from the Vault

0:14:38.080 --> 0:14:42.600
<v Speaker 1>of Midnights, okay, And then the other one is I

0:14:42.640 --> 0:14:44.040
<v Speaker 1>don't even know where You're losing me?

0:14:44.160 --> 0:14:45.400
<v Speaker 3>You're losing me? Is I don't know.

0:14:45.480 --> 0:14:47.680
<v Speaker 2>It was just it was kind of what The Lakes

0:14:47.880 --> 0:14:48.280
<v Speaker 2>was for.

0:14:49.320 --> 0:14:51.400
<v Speaker 1>But the Lakes you can find on iTunes. This one

0:14:51.440 --> 0:14:53.400
<v Speaker 1>is just originally.

0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:56.280
<v Speaker 2>It was on just a CD originally and then she

0:14:56.360 --> 0:14:57.240
<v Speaker 2>eventually put it on.

0:14:58.040 --> 0:14:59.400
<v Speaker 3>How much longer is she gonna make us?

0:14:59.400 --> 0:15:04.280
<v Speaker 2>Way? No? But listen the fact that she got people

0:15:04.400 --> 0:15:09.040
<v Speaker 2>to download a digital copy from her website. I don't

0:15:09.080 --> 0:15:11.120
<v Speaker 2>even know where it is on my phone anymore. I

0:15:11.440 --> 0:15:12.040
<v Speaker 2>don't know.

0:15:12.360 --> 0:15:14.360
<v Speaker 3>I only have the link you sent me. That's the

0:15:14.400 --> 0:15:15.440
<v Speaker 3>only thing I've been listening to.

0:15:15.600 --> 0:15:17.160
<v Speaker 2>That's I need to go back to that and find

0:15:17.160 --> 0:15:19.040
<v Speaker 2>it because I can't find it in my drop box

0:15:19.440 --> 0:15:24.040
<v Speaker 2>that's where it's living. It's been crazy. But the fact

0:15:24.080 --> 0:15:26.280
<v Speaker 2>that she has the power to get people to do

0:15:26.320 --> 0:15:28.520
<v Speaker 2>that or to like go to the storm. But who

0:15:28.600 --> 0:15:32.680
<v Speaker 2>has a CD player? Not me? I don't have. I

0:15:32.720 --> 0:15:39.720
<v Speaker 2>don't you probably have? Like the first Yeah, I imagine

0:15:39.760 --> 0:15:44.040
<v Speaker 2>Easton has a room full of like relics of is

0:15:44.040 --> 0:15:46.840
<v Speaker 2>that a good word? Thank you so much.

0:15:49.160 --> 0:15:51.360
<v Speaker 4>I like a lot of dumb old stuff. So I

0:15:51.440 --> 0:15:53.800
<v Speaker 4>have a lot stuff, but I'm the only one. Our

0:15:53.800 --> 0:15:55.880
<v Speaker 4>friends have to borrow our CD drive. You borrowed it

0:15:55.920 --> 0:15:59.560
<v Speaker 4>at one point. Yeah, so if anyone needs a CD drive,

0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:00.040
<v Speaker 4>I got it.

0:16:00.200 --> 0:16:01.120
<v Speaker 2>But what do you like?

0:16:01.120 --> 0:16:02.000
<v Speaker 3>What do you use it for?

0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:03.800
<v Speaker 4>Old stuff?

0:16:03.840 --> 0:16:05.800
<v Speaker 3>I cannot get a regular basis, right.

0:16:05.720 --> 0:16:07.160
<v Speaker 4>No, I mean I usually just rip it onto the

0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:08.720
<v Speaker 4>computer and then I can play on my phone.

0:16:08.920 --> 0:16:10.840
<v Speaker 6>Well that's why I used it, right, so I could

0:16:11.280 --> 0:16:13.160
<v Speaker 6>make digital copies of DVDs.

0:16:13.320 --> 0:16:15.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, well can you do this for the Taylor Swift

0:16:15.600 --> 0:16:16.040
<v Speaker 3>song for us?

0:16:16.160 --> 0:16:18.200
<v Speaker 4>Yes, I made a video for back on how to

0:16:18.200 --> 0:16:19.520
<v Speaker 4>load it into her Apple Music.

0:16:20.160 --> 0:16:22.120
<v Speaker 2>But that means I have to get on That means

0:16:22.120 --> 0:16:22.960
<v Speaker 2>I have to get on.

0:16:22.880 --> 0:16:25.600
<v Speaker 4>My on your computer computer.

0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:30.160
<v Speaker 2>Honestly, my computer is essentially like it got used for

0:16:30.240 --> 0:16:32.600
<v Speaker 2>Zoom during the pandemic, and that's the most it's ever

0:16:32.680 --> 0:16:35.280
<v Speaker 2>been used. I just do everything on my phone. Don't

0:16:35.360 --> 0:16:38.200
<v Speaker 2>say that tracks I know what the title of this

0:16:38.280 --> 0:16:43.880
<v Speaker 2>episode is, Okay, I don't know the others as much

0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:46.160
<v Speaker 2>as I know. You're losing me because I don't think

0:16:46.160 --> 0:16:49.960
<v Speaker 2>I've ever listened to a song one. Yeah, it's the Karma, Oh,

0:16:50.000 --> 0:16:52.880
<v Speaker 2>it's snow on the Beach with Morlana del Rey Hits Different,

0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:55.240
<v Speaker 2>and then uh Karmel with Ice Spice.

0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:57.640
<v Speaker 1>Oh, I'm just going with Hits Different because that's like

0:16:57.680 --> 0:16:59.280
<v Speaker 1>the one that we haven't heard before.

0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:01.240
<v Speaker 2>Okay, well, well what do you think about that song?

0:17:01.440 --> 0:17:03.800
<v Speaker 2>Any theories on it? Oh?

0:17:04.000 --> 0:17:06.000
<v Speaker 3>Theories like who is it about? I think they're both

0:17:06.000 --> 0:17:06.520
<v Speaker 3>about Joe.

0:17:08.320 --> 0:17:11.159
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, here's what I thought. How long ago do

0:17:11.240 --> 0:17:12.720
<v Speaker 2>you think she and Joe broke up?

0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:18.160
<v Speaker 3>That I haven't hypothesized.

0:17:17.560 --> 0:17:22.000
<v Speaker 2>Because there is a theory that Midnights is a breakup album.

0:17:23.200 --> 0:17:25.040
<v Speaker 3>Well, she told us what Midnights was.

0:17:25.760 --> 0:17:29.680
<v Speaker 1>It's a compilation of her sleepless midnights across her life.

0:17:30.040 --> 0:17:32.440
<v Speaker 2>I still think that's what it is. Like, I think

0:17:32.440 --> 0:17:35.560
<v Speaker 2>it's about like a lot of different things. Yeah, but

0:17:36.080 --> 0:17:39.600
<v Speaker 2>there's rumors like, oh, this confirms that it's a breakup album.

0:17:39.600 --> 0:17:40.720
<v Speaker 2>But I don't really think.

0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:44.800
<v Speaker 1>That, no, because I do think Vigilante was written about

0:17:44.880 --> 0:17:46.720
<v Speaker 1>somebody else, you know what I mean?

0:17:47.520 --> 0:17:49.600
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I believed myself.

0:17:49.720 --> 0:17:50.480
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, I appreciate it.

0:17:50.560 --> 0:17:56.000
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. The song You're Losing Me might be one of

0:17:56.000 --> 0:17:58.160
<v Speaker 2>my favorite songs of her she's ever written.

0:17:58.200 --> 0:17:58.840
<v Speaker 3>I agree.

0:17:58.920 --> 0:18:02.720
<v Speaker 1>If you're not choose me, You're Losing me is quite

0:18:02.760 --> 0:18:06.040
<v Speaker 1>possibly the best lyric I've ever heard in my life.

0:18:06.600 --> 0:18:10.440
<v Speaker 2>The bridge where she's like, do something, babe, say something.

0:18:10.800 --> 0:18:15.159
<v Speaker 2>It's like she's begging, begging, begging to.

0:18:15.040 --> 0:18:18.000
<v Speaker 1>Be chosen, to be chosen. She just wants to be chosen.

0:18:18.040 --> 0:18:19.760
<v Speaker 1>And why is Joe not choosing her?

0:18:20.560 --> 0:18:24.199
<v Speaker 2>When she's like, do something, babe, risk something like, she's like,

0:18:24.400 --> 0:18:26.200
<v Speaker 2>just anything.

0:18:26.440 --> 0:18:31.199
<v Speaker 3>Yes, So I think she wanted to get married.

0:18:32.000 --> 0:18:34.600
<v Speaker 1>They were together for six years, right, and he was

0:18:34.600 --> 0:18:35.639
<v Speaker 1>holding out for some reason.

0:18:37.480 --> 0:18:40.440
<v Speaker 3>He was not choosing her. That's the ultimate choosing, right.

0:18:41.240 --> 0:18:45.800
<v Speaker 2>Choosing to marry Yeah, I guess, I mean, if that's

0:18:45.840 --> 0:18:46.760
<v Speaker 2>what the other person wants.

0:18:46.760 --> 0:18:48.920
<v Speaker 1>Well, they were in a relationship, so she was being

0:18:49.000 --> 0:18:51.840
<v Speaker 1>chosen somewhat, but she wasn't getting the ultimate choosing, you

0:18:51.840 --> 0:18:52.280
<v Speaker 1>know what I mean.

0:18:52.480 --> 0:18:56.600
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, But some argue that it's the opposite. It's the

0:18:56.600 --> 0:18:59.680
<v Speaker 6>couples that don't get married long term that are consciously

0:18:59.760 --> 0:19:02.240
<v Speaker 6>choosing each other each day because they are not required

0:19:02.280 --> 0:19:02.600
<v Speaker 6>to be.

0:19:02.600 --> 0:19:08.120
<v Speaker 2>There legally, right, there's no legal bind Well anyways.

0:19:07.640 --> 0:19:08.920
<v Speaker 3>This is just my own hypothesis.

0:19:09.400 --> 0:19:13.200
<v Speaker 2>And when she says I wouldn't marry me either, a

0:19:13.320 --> 0:19:16.800
<v Speaker 2>pathological people, please, sir, I know.

0:19:18.320 --> 0:19:18.680
<v Speaker 3>I know.

0:19:20.119 --> 0:19:24.320
<v Speaker 2>Who only wanted you to see her and I'm screaming

0:19:24.560 --> 0:19:29.280
<v Speaker 2>out or something, do something, babe. The whole time I

0:19:29.320 --> 0:19:30.840
<v Speaker 2>was listening to the song, I was like, Oh, I

0:19:30.840 --> 0:19:32.200
<v Speaker 2>love this, I love this. And when I got to

0:19:32.240 --> 0:19:37.280
<v Speaker 2>the bridge, I was like, she's the queen of the bridge.

0:19:37.000 --> 0:19:39.719
<v Speaker 2>She is the king of the bridge.

0:19:39.840 --> 0:19:40.240
<v Speaker 5>Wow.

0:19:40.680 --> 0:19:44.240
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it is pretty. It is pretty remarkable.

0:19:44.400 --> 0:19:48.080
<v Speaker 1>How I just feel like that sentiment in itself is

0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:49.160
<v Speaker 1>so universal.

0:19:49.720 --> 0:19:53.760
<v Speaker 3>It's so crazy to me that she has felt that.

0:19:54.600 --> 0:19:57.760
<v Speaker 2>I something about that. I don't know if I obviously

0:19:57.840 --> 0:19:59.840
<v Speaker 2>feel sad that she experienced it, but I'm also like

0:20:00.280 --> 0:20:06.160
<v Speaker 2>so validated that Taylor Swift is begging to be chosen

0:20:07.200 --> 0:20:12.080
<v Speaker 2>like she is like us. The significance of Taylor Swift

0:20:12.240 --> 0:20:14.800
<v Speaker 2>is the biggest pop star of our I would say

0:20:14.800 --> 0:20:15.840
<v Speaker 2>of our generation. Right.

0:20:16.240 --> 0:20:17.359
<v Speaker 3>And also, here's my question.

0:20:17.400 --> 0:20:17.760
<v Speaker 2>By far?

0:20:18.600 --> 0:20:21.840
<v Speaker 1>Was he not choosing her? Was he going to choose her?

0:20:22.119 --> 0:20:24.080
<v Speaker 1>He just wasn't choosing her at the pace at which

0:20:24.080 --> 0:20:25.199
<v Speaker 1>she needed to be chosen.

0:20:25.440 --> 0:20:28.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh but like six years, Like how long has she

0:20:28.080 --> 0:20:32.440
<v Speaker 2>been asking him to choose? That's the question. You want

0:20:32.440 --> 0:20:34.439
<v Speaker 2>to know? What else is crazy? We don't even know

0:20:34.440 --> 0:20:37.520
<v Speaker 2>if this is about Joe. I think it is well,

0:20:37.560 --> 0:20:39.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm just saying, we'll never know.

0:20:39.680 --> 0:20:42.800
<v Speaker 6>Have you found that songs hit different now that she

0:20:42.880 --> 0:20:44.600
<v Speaker 6>has broken up with Joe, Like when I hear New

0:20:44.680 --> 0:20:46.639
<v Speaker 6>Year's Eve, I think to myself, he did it. He

0:20:46.720 --> 0:20:49.440
<v Speaker 6>became a stranger who's last you would recognize anywhere.

0:20:50.040 --> 0:20:54.399
<v Speaker 2>That line is like one of the most soul crushing lines.

0:20:54.520 --> 0:20:58.600
<v Speaker 2>New Year's Eve has some heartbreaking lines in there. That song,

0:20:58.800 --> 0:21:03.600
<v Speaker 2>that's a great one. But also like when I when

0:21:03.640 --> 0:21:07.440
<v Speaker 2>I hear when I hear your losing Me, the melody

0:21:07.560 --> 0:21:12.040
<v Speaker 2>reminds me of Labyrinth and that that transition from oh no,

0:21:12.160 --> 0:21:15.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm falling in love again to just say some do something,

0:21:15.520 --> 0:21:16.440
<v Speaker 2>They've say something.

0:21:19.240 --> 0:21:19.520
<v Speaker 3>I know.

0:21:19.680 --> 0:21:22.240
<v Speaker 1>The concept of being chosen is fairly new to me

0:21:22.480 --> 0:21:24.879
<v Speaker 1>because I worked on this interesting I worked on I

0:21:24.920 --> 0:21:26.920
<v Speaker 1>worked through this in therapy because there was a point.

0:21:27.000 --> 0:21:29.320
<v Speaker 1>Obviously Robbie and I are on the same page now

0:21:29.400 --> 0:21:32.600
<v Speaker 1>in terms of our future, what we want, where we're going.

0:21:32.720 --> 0:21:35.239
<v Speaker 1>You know that the pace of it is whenever we've

0:21:35.320 --> 0:21:37.080
<v Speaker 1>never been in sync with But I don't think two

0:21:37.080 --> 0:21:39.440
<v Speaker 1>people really are at.

0:21:39.359 --> 0:21:40.719
<v Speaker 3>Every point in their relationship.

0:21:41.200 --> 0:21:43.440
<v Speaker 1>But I remember when we were going through that phase

0:21:43.560 --> 0:21:46.360
<v Speaker 1>of just like it was important to me to know

0:21:46.400 --> 0:21:48.880
<v Speaker 1>that we were on the same page, like we were

0:21:49.320 --> 0:21:51.080
<v Speaker 1>gonna be engaged, going to be married, like all that

0:21:51.160 --> 0:21:54.199
<v Speaker 1>kind of stuff coming in the future. And I was

0:21:54.359 --> 0:21:57.200
<v Speaker 1>trying to like reason with myself, not like trying to

0:21:57.200 --> 0:21:59.240
<v Speaker 1>figure out for myself why was it so important? Like

0:21:59.280 --> 0:22:00.840
<v Speaker 1>why is it so import I mean, like you were saying,

0:22:00.840 --> 0:22:03.000
<v Speaker 1>a lot of people say, even just going your whole life,

0:22:03.160 --> 0:22:05.639
<v Speaker 1>not being married, is more of a commitment because you're

0:22:05.680 --> 0:22:07.280
<v Speaker 1>choosing every day to be with that person. So I

0:22:07.320 --> 0:22:10.600
<v Speaker 1>was like, he's choosing me every day. We're in a relationship,

0:22:10.720 --> 0:22:13.040
<v Speaker 1>But why do I want the ultimate? Like and that,

0:22:13.240 --> 0:22:16.920
<v Speaker 1>And when my therapist said, like you want to be chosen,

0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:17.280
<v Speaker 1>I was.

0:22:17.240 --> 0:22:18.719
<v Speaker 5>Like, whoa.

0:22:19.680 --> 0:22:23.400
<v Speaker 1>It was such a crazy concept that had never been

0:22:23.520 --> 0:22:26.280
<v Speaker 1>brought to me like that way before. So the fact

0:22:26.320 --> 0:22:28.760
<v Speaker 1>that Taylor wrote this song and something that I'm like

0:22:28.920 --> 0:22:31.120
<v Speaker 1>newly discovered, you know what I mean, the last year

0:22:31.119 --> 0:22:33.240
<v Speaker 1>of my life is so crazy to me.

0:22:33.480 --> 0:22:35.960
<v Speaker 2>I just had this too. I'm just realizing this too,

0:22:36.040 --> 0:22:39.600
<v Speaker 2>like how important it is. I just feel like we

0:22:39.840 --> 0:22:42.840
<v Speaker 2>are with Taylor, We're all going through the same thing.

0:22:43.240 --> 0:22:45.640
<v Speaker 2>Life is a little different for all of us, right,

0:22:45.760 --> 0:22:48.480
<v Speaker 2>it looks a little different, right.

0:22:47.840 --> 0:22:51.600
<v Speaker 1>He has like a PJ and I have like a

0:22:51.600 --> 0:22:58.520
<v Speaker 1>PET and I have a Ford Bronco. Right, but you

0:22:58.560 --> 0:23:01.320
<v Speaker 1>know we in this thing. Yeah, we're doing the same thing.

0:23:01.359 --> 0:23:03.240
<v Speaker 1>We're walking the same walk of life.

0:23:03.480 --> 0:23:08.280
<v Speaker 2>We're experiencing the motions, the depth, the depth. Yeah, wow,

0:23:08.440 --> 0:23:11.200
<v Speaker 2>it was just incredible. I don't know if it's I

0:23:11.240 --> 0:23:13.840
<v Speaker 2>think it's a popular opinion, but I don't love the

0:23:13.960 --> 0:23:14.840
<v Speaker 2>Karma remix.

0:23:15.400 --> 0:23:17.720
<v Speaker 5>But I know it's it's it's pointless.

0:23:17.840 --> 0:23:18.880
<v Speaker 2>I just feel like.

0:23:20.920 --> 0:23:24.360
<v Speaker 3>I've never liked any of her remixes. Honestly, I don't

0:23:24.400 --> 0:23:25.439
<v Speaker 3>like remixes in general.

0:23:25.480 --> 0:23:26.639
<v Speaker 5>I don't get the point.

0:23:26.400 --> 0:23:29.200
<v Speaker 6>Of really re releasing a song with some other popular

0:23:29.280 --> 0:23:31.800
<v Speaker 6>artists contributing a verse because it's just the same words.

0:23:31.840 --> 0:23:33.800
<v Speaker 6>But I don't get it because what they do is

0:23:34.880 --> 0:23:36.359
<v Speaker 6>added Beyonce to that song.

0:23:39.600 --> 0:23:41.440
<v Speaker 1>Because what people want to do is when their song

0:23:41.520 --> 0:23:44.320
<v Speaker 1>is doing well, let's say on the radio, and it's

0:23:44.440 --> 0:23:47.960
<v Speaker 1>losing steam, if they add someone else onto it, it

0:23:48.040 --> 0:23:49.880
<v Speaker 1>kind of breathes a new life and then it can

0:23:49.880 --> 0:23:51.480
<v Speaker 1>pick back up and they can maybe get it further

0:23:51.520 --> 0:23:52.400
<v Speaker 1>and further up the chart.

0:23:52.760 --> 0:23:53.720
<v Speaker 2>That's why they do it.

0:23:54.520 --> 0:23:56.640
<v Speaker 3>If the song is like on the radio, Yeah, what.

0:23:56.640 --> 0:23:58.240
<v Speaker 5>Did Bieber inflict himself upon.

0:23:58.280 --> 0:24:00.119
<v Speaker 6>Remember there's a song that was perfectly fine then b

0:24:00.240 --> 0:24:01.479
<v Speaker 6>bre to throw himself all over.

0:24:01.760 --> 0:24:07.360
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, that was a hit with him.

0:24:07.760 --> 0:24:09.720
<v Speaker 1>I feel it was something that was really popular, but

0:24:09.920 --> 0:24:10.600
<v Speaker 1>really Eilish.

0:24:10.760 --> 0:24:15.400
<v Speaker 5>It was really eilsh Yeah it was. Was it bad guy? Yeah?

0:24:15.440 --> 0:24:17.240
<v Speaker 3>I think so. I don't remember, but you're right. It

0:24:17.240 --> 0:24:19.040
<v Speaker 3>was very pointless, very pointless.

0:24:19.119 --> 0:24:21.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, but she was like obsessed with him. That

0:24:21.640 --> 0:24:24.200
<v Speaker 2>was her dream. But I think that was a Billie

0:24:24.200 --> 0:24:25.280
<v Speaker 2>Eilish preference.

0:24:25.480 --> 0:24:25.720
<v Speaker 5>It was.

0:24:29.400 --> 0:24:32.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Wow, I just couldn't be happier to have that song.

0:24:32.760 --> 0:24:34.080
<v Speaker 2>I would like for her to have it on a

0:24:34.280 --> 0:24:36.600
<v Speaker 2>so I could just put on a little playlist to Spotify.

0:24:36.680 --> 0:24:38.359
<v Speaker 1>But I've been listening to hits different a lot because

0:24:38.359 --> 0:24:39.720
<v Speaker 1>it's on my iTunes.

0:24:39.840 --> 0:24:42.480
<v Speaker 3>But losing me, So are they not on Spotify?

0:24:42.600 --> 0:24:43.160
<v Speaker 5>Is that the issue?

0:24:43.200 --> 0:24:45.400
<v Speaker 2>You're losing me is not? Because it was a bonus

0:24:45.440 --> 0:24:48.600
<v Speaker 2>for the CD. Got it and then and then people

0:24:48.640 --> 0:24:52.000
<v Speaker 2>were I mean, honestly, Swifties are crazy. They were adding

0:24:52.000 --> 0:24:55.440
<v Speaker 2>it as a playlist onto Spotify so that you could

0:24:55.480 --> 0:24:57.720
<v Speaker 2>listen to it on Spotify as a playlist, and then

0:24:57.760 --> 0:25:01.840
<v Speaker 2>I think it got taken down. Listen you're not gonna

0:25:01.840 --> 0:25:07.760
<v Speaker 2>get past Taylor Slip's team when it comes to copyright infringement. No, no, no,

0:25:08.040 --> 0:25:08.400
<v Speaker 2>you're not.

0:25:08.440 --> 0:25:11.920
<v Speaker 1>But Taylor should also be gracious enough to just you

0:25:12.000 --> 0:25:13.119
<v Speaker 1>will give it you us.

0:25:13.280 --> 0:25:14.280
<v Speaker 2>I think she will soon.

0:25:14.440 --> 0:25:17.119
<v Speaker 6>I'm so fascinated by the whole I don't remember an

0:25:17.240 --> 0:25:21.480
<v Speaker 6>artist being this enormous like she is at this particular

0:25:21.520 --> 0:25:23.720
<v Speaker 6>point in time. Like, yes, plenty of bands in arts

0:25:23.800 --> 0:25:27.000
<v Speaker 6>have played stadiums before, but playing so many shows at

0:25:27.000 --> 0:25:29.639
<v Speaker 6>a stadium and tickets are still for two grand apiece

0:25:29.680 --> 0:25:32.440
<v Speaker 6>because you can't find them, like yeah, And the fact

0:25:32.440 --> 0:25:35.040
<v Speaker 6>that thousands of people show up outside the stadium to

0:25:35.040 --> 0:25:36.200
<v Speaker 6>sing along to her songs.

0:25:36.280 --> 0:25:38.480
<v Speaker 5>I don't remember this happening and I've been alive for

0:25:38.520 --> 0:25:38.920
<v Speaker 5>a long time.

0:25:39.000 --> 0:25:41.960
<v Speaker 1>The fact that people wearing diapers not to go, Yeah,

0:25:43.800 --> 0:25:48.479
<v Speaker 1>I know, I just throw some period panties on a

0:25:48.480 --> 0:25:49.040
<v Speaker 1>call of to day.

0:25:50.080 --> 0:25:52.000
<v Speaker 3>Those things can hold some liquid.

0:25:51.760 --> 0:25:56.679
<v Speaker 2>You know. I'm devastated by that. Yeah, I was thinking

0:25:56.720 --> 0:26:00.440
<v Speaker 2>the same thing, like, I just don't know if there

0:26:00.480 --> 0:26:04.879
<v Speaker 2>ever will be someone who does what she does or

0:26:04.920 --> 0:26:07.640
<v Speaker 2>what she's been able to do in this like this

0:26:07.680 --> 0:26:10.120
<v Speaker 2>particular time of her life.

0:26:10.160 --> 0:26:13.600
<v Speaker 5>And she's buying all typical career arcs.

0:26:13.840 --> 0:26:16.640
<v Speaker 6>You know, typically album it builds, it builds, and maybe

0:26:16.680 --> 0:26:18.199
<v Speaker 6>it starts to back down a little bit at a

0:26:18.200 --> 0:26:19.920
<v Speaker 6>certain point. And that's what I kind of thought might

0:26:19.960 --> 0:26:23.160
<v Speaker 6>have been happening with Folklore and Evermore because they weren't

0:26:23.200 --> 0:26:26.120
<v Speaker 6>such big radio friendly songs. And now she's bigger than

0:26:26.240 --> 0:26:29.159
<v Speaker 6>ever before, which is not how this normally goes. You

0:26:29.200 --> 0:26:31.080
<v Speaker 6>normally zoomed to the top, and it's kind of a

0:26:31.080 --> 0:26:33.800
<v Speaker 6>slower fade where she's just getting bigger and bigger. And

0:26:33.840 --> 0:26:35.760
<v Speaker 6>by this time ten years from now, I don't know

0:26:35.880 --> 0:26:38.399
<v Speaker 6>she'd be president because it just gets larger and larger.

0:26:38.440 --> 0:26:38.800
<v Speaker 2>It does.

0:26:38.880 --> 0:26:40.199
<v Speaker 3>It just gets larger and larger.

0:26:40.280 --> 0:26:41.280
<v Speaker 2>She has my vote.

0:26:41.359 --> 0:26:45.320
<v Speaker 3>She has my vote too, and Taylor we trust.

0:26:47.920 --> 0:26:48.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:26:48.359 --> 0:26:51.080
<v Speaker 3>Wow, should we do some emails?

0:26:51.560 --> 0:26:52.960
<v Speaker 2>I think we should do some emails.

0:26:53.040 --> 0:26:54.240
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, he looks really good today.

0:26:54.359 --> 0:26:57.119
<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much. That's so kind. We'll be right

0:26:57.160 --> 0:27:17.159
<v Speaker 2>back with email. All right, before we start emails. I

0:27:17.160 --> 0:27:18.920
<v Speaker 2>forgot I wanted to talk about this. So I saw

0:27:18.920 --> 0:27:22.440
<v Speaker 2>this TikTok and Breneo Brown was on it or yeah,

0:27:22.720 --> 0:27:24.600
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what podcast it was, but she was

0:27:24.600 --> 0:27:26.879
<v Speaker 2>on a podcast. I'll try to find it. And she

0:27:27.000 --> 0:27:29.320
<v Speaker 2>was talking about how she doesn't believe that relationships are

0:27:29.359 --> 0:27:31.160
<v Speaker 2>fifty to fifty. She was like, I just don't think

0:27:31.160 --> 0:27:38.560
<v Speaker 2>it's realistic to expect that both partners are able to

0:27:38.640 --> 0:27:41.240
<v Speaker 2>be at one hundred percent at all times or be

0:27:41.280 --> 0:27:44.000
<v Speaker 2>able to give the same amount every single day type thing.

0:27:44.359 --> 0:27:47.560
<v Speaker 2>So she's like, sometimes at night, my husband and I like,

0:27:48.000 --> 0:27:51.000
<v Speaker 2>he'll say I'm at twenty today, and she's like, I'm good,

0:27:51.040 --> 0:27:52.760
<v Speaker 2>I got you. I'm at eighty, Like I got your

0:27:52.880 --> 0:27:55.760
<v Speaker 2>eighty covered, Like I can match you where you need right,

0:27:56.320 --> 0:27:58.280
<v Speaker 2>And then she was saying like, sometimes if we're both

0:27:58.400 --> 0:28:01.879
<v Speaker 2>at a low number, like I'm at ten and he's like, well,

0:28:01.920 --> 0:28:04.719
<v Speaker 2>I'm at twenty, it's like, how can we show up

0:28:04.720 --> 0:28:07.399
<v Speaker 2>for each other in a kind way knowing that we

0:28:07.480 --> 0:28:12.520
<v Speaker 2>don't have you know enough to feel where you're struggling.

0:28:13.000 --> 0:28:15.320
<v Speaker 2>I thought that was really interesting because I feel like

0:28:15.640 --> 0:28:18.200
<v Speaker 2>it every time. I feel like I've always heard relationships

0:28:18.240 --> 0:28:21.040
<v Speaker 2>are fifty to fifty. You show up, you're fifty percent.

0:28:21.080 --> 0:28:22.920
<v Speaker 2>The other person shows up with they're fifty percent.

0:28:22.960 --> 0:28:25.159
<v Speaker 1>To me, I feel like that got debunked recently, and

0:28:25.200 --> 0:28:26.760
<v Speaker 1>it's like, now it's one hundred and one hundred.

0:28:26.800 --> 0:28:28.280
<v Speaker 3>Each person has to be giving a hundred.

0:28:28.320 --> 0:28:31.240
<v Speaker 2>Okay, right, so whatever it is, each person giving a hundred,

0:28:31.760 --> 0:28:36.160
<v Speaker 2>whatever it is, the idea is that we're we shouldn't

0:28:36.160 --> 0:28:41.240
<v Speaker 2>be expected to be at our highest best every single day.

0:28:41.720 --> 0:28:44.040
<v Speaker 2>And then it's okay if like both people are feeling

0:28:44.080 --> 0:28:47.400
<v Speaker 2>like I have nothing, Like I'm I don't have enough

0:28:47.520 --> 0:28:49.200
<v Speaker 2>to give to myself and to you.

0:28:49.520 --> 0:28:50.680
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, but how do.

0:28:50.680 --> 0:28:52.720
<v Speaker 2>We do it in a way that's not gonna hurt

0:28:52.800 --> 0:28:53.120
<v Speaker 2>the other?

0:28:53.520 --> 0:28:53.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:28:53.880 --> 0:28:56.880
<v Speaker 2>Or going to constriction? I know, I thought it was

0:28:56.920 --> 0:28:58.440
<v Speaker 2>interesting too, and a lot of people in the comments

0:28:58.480 --> 0:29:00.560
<v Speaker 2>are going to like, uh, like nah, and then people

0:29:00.560 --> 0:29:02.200
<v Speaker 2>are like, oh, this is really good, and I thought

0:29:02.440 --> 0:29:03.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm going to bring this to the podcast.

0:29:04.280 --> 0:29:06.680
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I mean I think that it is interesting.

0:29:06.720 --> 0:29:10.720
<v Speaker 1>I always, you know, I like to be positive and

0:29:10.720 --> 0:29:12.520
<v Speaker 1>look at the bright side and have that go get

0:29:12.600 --> 0:29:13.120
<v Speaker 1>or energy.

0:29:14.320 --> 0:29:16.400
<v Speaker 3>And I really feel like I've met my match.

0:29:16.160 --> 0:29:19.120
<v Speaker 1>And Robbie because he really brings it tenfold even when

0:29:19.160 --> 0:29:22.040
<v Speaker 1>he's got like so much stuff going on in his

0:29:22.120 --> 0:29:24.680
<v Speaker 1>own life, Like he can be there for me in

0:29:24.720 --> 0:29:26.959
<v Speaker 1>a way that I could never be for him if

0:29:26.960 --> 0:29:28.480
<v Speaker 1>I had that stuff going on in my life, do

0:29:28.480 --> 0:29:30.840
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean? Like it's pretty remarkable, and

0:29:30.880 --> 0:29:32.960
<v Speaker 1>so it makes me want to be better because he's

0:29:33.040 --> 0:29:33.400
<v Speaker 1>that way.

0:29:34.120 --> 0:29:36.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. So like even if you don't have it, if

0:29:36.440 --> 0:29:39.880
<v Speaker 2>he can match you, it almost like because I feel

0:29:39.920 --> 0:29:43.600
<v Speaker 2>like sometimes if your partner is able to give to

0:29:43.680 --> 0:29:46.600
<v Speaker 2>you and fill up your tank or whatever it is,

0:29:47.440 --> 0:29:51.080
<v Speaker 2>it almost it gives you the energy to show up. Yeah,

0:29:51.120 --> 0:29:52.720
<v Speaker 2>a little more than maybe you had before.

0:29:52.960 --> 0:29:53.200
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:29:53.240 --> 0:29:55.440
<v Speaker 2>You know, but when you're both feeling down, like have

0:29:55.520 --> 0:29:57.680
<v Speaker 2>you and Robbie ever both been down at the same time,

0:29:58.440 --> 0:29:59.360
<v Speaker 2>We're like you didn't feel it.

0:29:59.480 --> 0:30:02.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, But but like when he's down, he can have perspective,

0:30:03.080 --> 0:30:05.480
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean, and be like, yes, we're

0:30:05.480 --> 0:30:07.440
<v Speaker 1>feeling this way, but this is just a storm, Like

0:30:07.440 --> 0:30:09.920
<v Speaker 1>this is just temporary. Like there, this is we're not

0:30:09.960 --> 0:30:11.920
<v Speaker 1>seeing the forest through the trees. And I'm like, you're right,

0:30:12.400 --> 0:30:14.080
<v Speaker 1>so right, this is temporary.

0:30:14.520 --> 0:30:16.280
<v Speaker 2>Not seeing the forest.

0:30:16.040 --> 0:30:19.240
<v Speaker 5>Through the trees, not see the forest for the trees.

0:30:20.440 --> 0:30:26.360
<v Speaker 3>The expression, Oh not tracks, you're.

0:30:26.280 --> 0:30:28.120
<v Speaker 5>Not seeing the big picture. You're only focused on what's

0:30:28.160 --> 0:30:28.680
<v Speaker 5>right in front of it.

0:30:28.800 --> 0:30:30.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, yeah, So like that's what I can do,

0:30:30.840 --> 0:30:32.680
<v Speaker 1>Like I can focus on just what's right in front

0:30:32.680 --> 0:30:34.400
<v Speaker 1>of me, and he can focus on the big picture.

0:30:34.840 --> 0:30:38.040
<v Speaker 2>Oh that's nice. That's a good uh, balance.

0:30:38.120 --> 0:30:39.840
<v Speaker 3>Tell me it's necessary at times.

0:30:40.240 --> 0:30:42.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I do feel like you met your match in that. Yeah,

0:30:42.320 --> 0:30:44.200
<v Speaker 2>because like even you posted something about like you woke

0:30:44.280 --> 0:30:46.440
<v Speaker 2>up not feeling you felt sanzy, and I was like,

0:30:46.520 --> 0:30:47.920
<v Speaker 2>let's go yeah literally.

0:30:47.680 --> 0:30:49.520
<v Speaker 3>Yes, yesterday? Was it yesterday? Yeah?

0:30:49.560 --> 0:30:51.720
<v Speaker 1>I woke up kind of sanzy vibes. I'd I went

0:30:52.200 --> 0:30:58.440
<v Speaker 1>gluttonous the night before, just full gluten, just glu down

0:30:58.480 --> 0:31:06.040
<v Speaker 1>with pizza toe, pizza toes, pierreline cookie.

0:31:06.480 --> 0:31:07.960
<v Speaker 3>Yeah it isn't full blown gluten.

0:31:08.000 --> 0:31:09.760
<v Speaker 1>So anyways, I woke up Sunday feeling kind of like

0:31:10.240 --> 0:31:12.440
<v Speaker 1>groggy and out of it, and Robbie woke up with

0:31:12.480 --> 0:31:14.200
<v Speaker 1>this attitude of like, let's get it good.

0:31:14.600 --> 0:31:15.640
<v Speaker 3>You know, he does this whole thing.

0:31:15.680 --> 0:31:17.120
<v Speaker 1>And I was like, you know what, I'm gonna book

0:31:17.160 --> 0:31:19.120
<v Speaker 1>my workout class and once hert to class.

0:31:19.600 --> 0:31:21.680
<v Speaker 3>Wow, yeah that's great. Yeah.

0:31:22.280 --> 0:31:25.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't even think the most encouraging hype person could

0:31:25.040 --> 0:31:28.280
<v Speaker 2>do that for me personally, But I'm happy that you

0:31:28.320 --> 0:31:28.760
<v Speaker 2>have found you.

0:31:28.920 --> 0:31:30.680
<v Speaker 5>Lack is to try Sunday morning, give you.

0:31:30.600 --> 0:31:34.880
<v Speaker 1>A definitely not on Sunday morning, little voice note to

0:31:34.960 --> 0:31:35.600
<v Speaker 1>pump you up.

0:31:35.960 --> 0:31:38.840
<v Speaker 2>Definitely not on a Sunday morning. That's not gonna happen

0:31:38.920 --> 0:31:40.600
<v Speaker 2>all right. I would try a weekday if you were

0:31:40.640 --> 0:31:43.640
<v Speaker 2>gonna try it, but I also don't recommend. Shall I

0:31:43.640 --> 0:31:44.320
<v Speaker 2>get into emails?

0:31:44.400 --> 0:31:44.640
<v Speaker 3>Yes?

0:31:44.720 --> 0:31:46.360
<v Speaker 6>I feel bad for this first one. This is the

0:31:46.440 --> 0:31:49.440
<v Speaker 6>kind of guy we've talked about before. It's so anonymous.

0:31:49.520 --> 0:31:49.920
<v Speaker 5>She says.

0:31:50.440 --> 0:31:53.080
<v Speaker 6>I'm thirty two, married seven years, with two kids five

0:31:53.120 --> 0:31:56.680
<v Speaker 6>and under. My husband has always had two Instagrams.

0:31:56.040 --> 0:31:56.760
<v Speaker 5>Since we met.

0:31:57.200 --> 0:31:59.600
<v Speaker 6>At the beginning, I found him messaging other girls for

0:31:59.640 --> 0:32:03.240
<v Speaker 6>pictures and saving pictures of other girls. Years ago, I

0:32:03.240 --> 0:32:05.560
<v Speaker 6>found out his second Instagram was just to follow hot

0:32:05.640 --> 0:32:08.640
<v Speaker 6>chicks essentially. That was the second time after calling out

0:32:08.640 --> 0:32:12.040
<v Speaker 6>his made instagram previously, he made an excuse I never

0:32:12.040 --> 0:32:14.280
<v Speaker 6>should have believed, And looking back now, I wish I

0:32:14.360 --> 0:32:16.560
<v Speaker 6>was stronger to call off the relationship long ago.

0:32:16.680 --> 0:32:17.360
<v Speaker 5>But here I am.

0:32:17.920 --> 0:32:20.320
<v Speaker 6>He's always scrolling, He's always on his phone. He always

0:32:20.320 --> 0:32:22.160
<v Speaker 6>makes sure it's with him, even when he's in the shower,

0:32:22.200 --> 0:32:25.520
<v Speaker 6>it's right there next to him. I've looked multiple times recently,

0:32:25.520 --> 0:32:27.840
<v Speaker 6>and this is what he's following, thirst trap girl after

0:32:27.880 --> 0:32:31.320
<v Speaker 6>thirst trap girl. It's his whole scroll, his whole search page.

0:32:31.400 --> 0:32:33.880
<v Speaker 6>I can only imagine what else there is. Do I

0:32:34.000 --> 0:32:35.920
<v Speaker 6>keep putting this off like it's a guy thing. Do

0:32:36.040 --> 0:32:38.959
<v Speaker 6>I get therapy or do I get out? It clearly

0:32:39.000 --> 0:32:42.000
<v Speaker 6>has affected me, like body keeps the score type stuff.

0:32:42.320 --> 0:32:44.520
<v Speaker 6>I don't find him attractive. I don't want him to

0:32:44.560 --> 0:32:47.000
<v Speaker 6>touch me. Can we come back from this? After years

0:32:47.040 --> 0:32:49.880
<v Speaker 6>and years of him doing this, I don't see him changing.

0:32:54.960 --> 0:33:00.400
<v Speaker 2>My instinct gut reaction is get out. I feel like

0:33:00.480 --> 0:33:05.160
<v Speaker 2>it's constant disrespect after disrespect, like it. It feels like

0:33:05.240 --> 0:33:08.520
<v Speaker 2>this is a character thing, like Tony always talks about

0:33:08.600 --> 0:33:11.160
<v Speaker 2>character and I don't think this is a guy thing.

0:33:11.360 --> 0:33:13.600
<v Speaker 2>I think guy sure, they like looking at hot girls,

0:33:13.640 --> 0:33:16.280
<v Speaker 2>and I think this is a common issue of like

0:33:16.400 --> 0:33:20.120
<v Speaker 2>men liking or following girls. But I think the fact

0:33:20.120 --> 0:33:22.960
<v Speaker 2>that you have called him out on it and made

0:33:22.960 --> 0:33:25.160
<v Speaker 2>it clear that you're uncomfortable with it and it's still

0:33:25.320 --> 0:33:27.959
<v Speaker 2>going on, is just he has no respect for you

0:33:28.240 --> 0:33:29.880
<v Speaker 2>or what hurts you?

0:33:30.560 --> 0:33:33.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because you said he made an excuse. I never

0:33:33.320 --> 0:33:36.880
<v Speaker 1>should have believed so For me, I feel like if

0:33:36.920 --> 0:33:39.720
<v Speaker 1>you you've already brought this up, that it really bothers you.

0:33:39.840 --> 0:33:41.880
<v Speaker 1>And I think in a relationship, if you bring something

0:33:41.960 --> 0:33:44.480
<v Speaker 1>up that is really bothering you, that's something like this,

0:33:44.760 --> 0:33:47.760
<v Speaker 1>Like let's say, like, there's some things that you can't change,

0:33:47.800 --> 0:33:49.160
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean, Like, there are things that

0:33:49.200 --> 0:33:51.520
<v Speaker 1>you can't change about a person, if they're physical or

0:33:51.560 --> 0:33:53.280
<v Speaker 1>if they're you know, like there are but something like

0:33:53.320 --> 0:33:55.880
<v Speaker 1>this he can or he can work to a compromise,

0:33:55.920 --> 0:33:57.920
<v Speaker 1>Like if it's really hurting your feelings, he should be

0:33:57.960 --> 0:34:01.240
<v Speaker 1>able to figure some out. That's a compromise where he

0:34:01.280 --> 0:34:03.400
<v Speaker 1>feels like he's still being true to himself, which.

0:34:03.400 --> 0:34:04.400
<v Speaker 3>I don't know whatever that is.

0:34:04.480 --> 0:34:07.680
<v Speaker 1>But also I don't know, I don't know why he

0:34:07.880 --> 0:34:10.520
<v Speaker 1>likes looking at this, like I have no idea, but

0:34:10.600 --> 0:34:12.839
<v Speaker 1>I'm saying. What I'm saying is like he's not even

0:34:12.880 --> 0:34:15.000
<v Speaker 1>trying to compromise. He's coming up with an excuse.

0:34:15.239 --> 0:34:17.200
<v Speaker 2>I don't think this is a compromise situation.

0:34:17.600 --> 0:34:20.799
<v Speaker 1>And if it's really bothering you and he's making up excuses,

0:34:21.360 --> 0:34:22.879
<v Speaker 1>it's only going to get worse over time.

0:34:23.440 --> 0:34:25.840
<v Speaker 6>I feel like I know this guy, you know him

0:34:26.080 --> 0:34:28.360
<v Speaker 6>kinda Yeah, this guy was told by his parents his

0:34:28.360 --> 0:34:30.680
<v Speaker 6>whole life that he is God's gift, the greatest thing

0:34:30.719 --> 0:34:32.719
<v Speaker 6>in the world, which happens to so many guys whose

0:34:32.760 --> 0:34:34.560
<v Speaker 6>moms treat them like on a pedestal, and so they

0:34:34.560 --> 0:34:37.719
<v Speaker 6>get out into the world, and their feeling is, hey,

0:34:37.719 --> 0:34:39.080
<v Speaker 6>that's just who I am. Take it or leave it

0:34:39.080 --> 0:34:42.520
<v Speaker 6>because I'm awesome. Right, They don't see they're incredibly flawed people.

0:34:42.560 --> 0:34:44.520
<v Speaker 6>But they don't see the flaws because they've been told

0:34:44.520 --> 0:34:47.439
<v Speaker 6>their whole lives they don't have them. So when they're

0:34:47.520 --> 0:34:49.719
<v Speaker 6>dating someone or married to someone, they're like, take me

0:34:49.800 --> 0:34:51.759
<v Speaker 6>or leave me. This is who I am. As if

0:34:51.800 --> 0:34:54.320
<v Speaker 6>it's like, sorry, I don't like red sauce on spaghetti

0:34:54.440 --> 0:34:56.920
<v Speaker 6>or something silly like that, but it's not silly. So

0:34:56.960 --> 0:34:59.479
<v Speaker 6>what he needs to you need to make this clear

0:34:59.480 --> 0:35:02.080
<v Speaker 6>to him. And I do feel like you're telling him

0:35:02.120 --> 0:35:04.560
<v Speaker 6>I don't find you attractive anymore. I don't want you

0:35:04.600 --> 0:35:07.200
<v Speaker 6>to touch me. I want this to stop. As a

0:35:07.239 --> 0:35:09.760
<v Speaker 6>major blow to him, and it's going to cause problems

0:35:09.800 --> 0:35:11.640
<v Speaker 6>at first because he's going to fight that and think

0:35:11.719 --> 0:35:13.560
<v Speaker 6>you're wrong and you're a bee and all kinds of

0:35:13.560 --> 0:35:16.319
<v Speaker 6>other stuff, and he's probably going to spend time by himself.

0:35:16.000 --> 0:35:18.080
<v Speaker 5>But it's going to get into his head. He's going

0:35:18.120 --> 0:35:20.520
<v Speaker 5>to figure out that this is disrespectful to you.

0:35:21.160 --> 0:35:23.600
<v Speaker 6>Sometimes it takes a major thing to get it through

0:35:23.600 --> 0:35:26.000
<v Speaker 6>a guy's head that this is disrespectful because they don't

0:35:26.040 --> 0:35:26.839
<v Speaker 6>see it that way.

0:35:27.120 --> 0:35:28.560
<v Speaker 5>I don't know that he would ever cheat on you.

0:35:28.600 --> 0:35:29.080
<v Speaker 5>He may not.

0:35:29.960 --> 0:35:33.840
<v Speaker 6>He may see this as absolutely harmless. But if he

0:35:33.960 --> 0:35:36.200
<v Speaker 6>understands that, how would he feel if you had nothing

0:35:36.239 --> 0:35:38.279
<v Speaker 6>but guys in speedo's on your Instagram?

0:35:38.680 --> 0:35:39.839
<v Speaker 5>I don't think he would like that.

0:35:40.080 --> 0:35:42.080
<v Speaker 2>Well, we're not. I don't think anybody.

0:35:42.080 --> 0:35:44.359
<v Speaker 6>You're right, it's different. You're right, it's totally different, But

0:35:44.360 --> 0:35:47.160
<v Speaker 6>the guys don't see it that way. Guys wouldn't want

0:35:47.239 --> 0:35:49.000
<v Speaker 6>dong photos all over your instagram.

0:35:49.000 --> 0:35:51.160
<v Speaker 5>He just wouldn't. But maybe it's not a good comparison.

0:35:51.200 --> 0:35:52.840
<v Speaker 5>I don't know. But he needs to.

0:35:53.320 --> 0:35:55.080
<v Speaker 6>We need to get us through his head that this

0:35:55.200 --> 0:35:58.120
<v Speaker 6>is Defcon five. We are in an emergency situation. You

0:35:58.280 --> 0:36:00.279
<v Speaker 6>no longer want to sleep with him, and you are

0:36:00.320 --> 0:36:03.279
<v Speaker 6>ready to leave. You are writing emails for podcasts on

0:36:03.320 --> 0:36:05.560
<v Speaker 6>what do I do? Should I end my marriage? He

0:36:05.600 --> 0:36:08.880
<v Speaker 6>needs to know we are at an urgent situation because

0:36:08.880 --> 0:36:12.200
<v Speaker 6>this could end nowhere in his mind as you think

0:36:12.239 --> 0:36:14.240
<v Speaker 6>this could end. He needs to know that it's possible

0:36:14.640 --> 0:36:15.959
<v Speaker 6>and maybe he'll figure it out.

0:36:16.400 --> 0:36:18.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I mean he's been able to get away with

0:36:18.600 --> 0:36:20.600
<v Speaker 2>it for a long time with no repercussions.

0:36:20.680 --> 0:36:22.040
<v Speaker 5>Yes, with every one of his exes.

0:36:22.600 --> 0:36:25.640
<v Speaker 1>I sound him messaging other girls for pictures and saving

0:36:25.719 --> 0:36:27.880
<v Speaker 1>pictures of other girls, Like that's.

0:36:27.680 --> 0:36:29.640
<v Speaker 2>Bad, it was good.

0:36:29.719 --> 0:36:31.520
<v Speaker 5>No, I don't know these girls. I just message them.

0:36:31.640 --> 0:36:34.359
<v Speaker 5>They don't meet them. Yeah, I send you pictures. It's

0:36:34.400 --> 0:36:35.680
<v Speaker 5>just pictures. What's the difference.

0:36:36.239 --> 0:36:38.240
<v Speaker 2>I just think it's like you look.

0:36:38.080 --> 0:36:39.879
<v Speaker 6>At chatting Terry to me think he's hot. It's totally

0:36:39.960 --> 0:36:43.799
<v Speaker 6>the same thing. Guys can justify all of it.

0:36:44.000 --> 0:36:48.319
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I'm telling you.

0:36:48.360 --> 0:36:52.040
<v Speaker 6>It takes guys forever to mature, but eventually we do.

0:36:52.520 --> 0:36:54.600
<v Speaker 6>It takes forever. I'm sorry, it takes forever.

0:36:54.640 --> 0:36:57.440
<v Speaker 5>It sucks. Eventually he will, and I hope it's not

0:36:57.480 --> 0:36:57.839
<v Speaker 5>too late.

0:37:00.120 --> 0:37:03.319
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I think get out before that.

0:37:04.400 --> 0:37:07.240
<v Speaker 1>No, it's so it just sucks because it's obviously affecting

0:37:07.239 --> 0:37:09.440
<v Speaker 1>you in such a big way, and he's clearly not

0:37:09.480 --> 0:37:10.120
<v Speaker 1>getting to him.

0:37:10.400 --> 0:37:14.040
<v Speaker 2>It's it's just that, you know, life is so short

0:37:14.120 --> 0:37:17.480
<v Speaker 2>and it's precious, and we so many I feel like

0:37:17.520 --> 0:37:21.960
<v Speaker 2>so many people settle for something that is so you

0:37:22.000 --> 0:37:27.400
<v Speaker 2>can bleep me shitty because they feel like it's going

0:37:27.440 --> 0:37:29.120
<v Speaker 2>to get or I don't want to start over, or

0:37:29.120 --> 0:37:32.040
<v Speaker 2>I don't want my kids to be affected. But why

0:37:32.080 --> 0:37:35.520
<v Speaker 2>should you spend your life with someone who disrespects you

0:37:35.600 --> 0:37:38.799
<v Speaker 2>to this level just for fear of having to start over?

0:37:38.880 --> 0:37:42.440
<v Speaker 2>Like there is a wonderful person out there who is

0:37:42.440 --> 0:37:46.440
<v Speaker 2>probably so willing to not even have social media, that

0:37:46.560 --> 0:37:50.080
<v Speaker 2>might not even think about looking at thirstrap photos, and

0:37:50.120 --> 0:37:53.080
<v Speaker 2>you deserve that. So it's like I get it, Like

0:37:53.120 --> 0:37:55.000
<v Speaker 2>you're married, you have kids, and you're like, can I

0:37:55.000 --> 0:37:58.799
<v Speaker 2>work this out? But also like, don't spend your whole

0:37:58.840 --> 0:38:01.800
<v Speaker 2>life with someone who can even like respect The simple

0:38:01.920 --> 0:38:04.680
<v Speaker 2>act of not following thirst traps.

0:38:04.760 --> 0:38:06.640
<v Speaker 6>The kids are another angle that you could use with him,

0:38:06.680 --> 0:38:08.400
<v Speaker 6>like how would you do you want the kids to

0:38:08.440 --> 0:38:09.279
<v Speaker 6>have divorced parents?

0:38:09.320 --> 0:38:10.640
<v Speaker 5>Do you want the kids? By the way, is that

0:38:10.640 --> 0:38:12.480
<v Speaker 5>the image you want to be in your kid's eyes?

0:38:12.600 --> 0:38:13.239
<v Speaker 5>What if your kids?

0:38:13.280 --> 0:38:14.480
<v Speaker 6>He doesn't say if it's a boy or girl, but

0:38:14.520 --> 0:38:16.440
<v Speaker 6>you want your daughter to see on your Instagram they

0:38:16.440 --> 0:38:17.800
<v Speaker 6>have nothing but bikini photos.

0:38:17.960 --> 0:38:19.800
<v Speaker 5>Is that the man you want her to see?

0:38:20.080 --> 0:38:22.920
<v Speaker 6>When we started the Almost Famous podcast, we had bachelor

0:38:22.920 --> 0:38:25.440
<v Speaker 6>people in every week, so I would and back then

0:38:25.440 --> 0:38:27.440
<v Speaker 6>I was doing the prep and so I would go

0:38:27.520 --> 0:38:29.840
<v Speaker 6>on Instagram, get pictures of them and put it on

0:38:29.880 --> 0:38:31.479
<v Speaker 6>the prep for Ben and Ashley to see a little

0:38:31.480 --> 0:38:32.880
<v Speaker 6>behind the scenes here. It's like, oh, you know so

0:38:32.920 --> 0:38:34.600
<v Speaker 6>and so, and there's a picture of her. But all

0:38:34.640 --> 0:38:36.640
<v Speaker 6>I was doing on Instagram because I'm not very much

0:38:36.719 --> 0:38:39.279
<v Speaker 6>is looking at women on the Bachelor of Women. So

0:38:39.320 --> 0:38:41.040
<v Speaker 6>one day I want my for you page and it

0:38:41.080 --> 0:38:43.160
<v Speaker 6>was nothing but Bachelor women in bikini. It's like, oh

0:38:43.200 --> 0:38:45.719
<v Speaker 6>my god, that's not me, and I don't want to

0:38:45.760 --> 0:38:47.359
<v Speaker 6>be seen as that guy. I don't want my wife

0:38:47.360 --> 0:38:48.560
<v Speaker 6>to see that. I want my kids to see that.

0:38:48.600 --> 0:38:50.480
<v Speaker 6>So I just got off Instagram for a while because

0:38:50.560 --> 0:38:51.480
<v Speaker 6>I don't want.

0:38:51.239 --> 0:38:54.080
<v Speaker 5>That to be me. Yeah, he needs to think of

0:38:54.120 --> 0:38:56.040
<v Speaker 5>it from his kids perspective too. You don't want to

0:38:56.040 --> 0:38:56.560
<v Speaker 5>be that guy.

0:38:56.840 --> 0:38:58.680
<v Speaker 2>I think you and this guy are very different.

0:38:59.160 --> 0:39:01.680
<v Speaker 6>We are now, but I used to be that guy.

0:39:01.800 --> 0:39:03.720
<v Speaker 6>I know i'm and that's hard for me to admit,

0:39:03.800 --> 0:39:07.120
<v Speaker 6>but I used to be that guy. I did whatever

0:39:07.160 --> 0:39:08.840
<v Speaker 6>I wanted and I was just like, everything's gonna be

0:39:08.840 --> 0:39:14.799
<v Speaker 6>fine because I'm awesome. I'm very embarrassed and humiliated about

0:39:14.800 --> 0:39:18.080
<v Speaker 6>the guy I was in my twenties that my wife met.

0:39:19.360 --> 0:39:21.960
<v Speaker 6>I've apologized for a million times. I can't believe she

0:39:22.040 --> 0:39:25.279
<v Speaker 6>married that guy. She never should have because he.

0:39:25.280 --> 0:39:27.480
<v Speaker 5>Was a dick. And this guy's a dick. But he'll

0:39:27.480 --> 0:39:28.799
<v Speaker 5>get through it, but it might be too late.

0:39:29.000 --> 0:39:37.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yikes. Anyway, regardless, Anonymous, you deserve more whatever you deserve,

0:39:37.719 --> 0:39:40.480
<v Speaker 2>whenever you choose, whether HiT's him working on himself and

0:39:40.480 --> 0:39:43.000
<v Speaker 2>getting better or you getting out and finding someone better,

0:39:43.040 --> 0:39:43.840
<v Speaker 2>you deserve better.

0:39:45.800 --> 0:39:48.200
<v Speaker 3>That's what you deserve better. There's a Megan Trainer song

0:39:48.280 --> 0:39:49.319
<v Speaker 3>shows into It's very good.

0:39:49.640 --> 0:39:49.839
<v Speaker 5>Good.

0:39:52.400 --> 0:39:53.359
<v Speaker 3>You deserve better.

0:39:53.640 --> 0:39:56.200
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, one more Anonymous. I know Becka's talked on the

0:39:56.239 --> 0:39:58.360
<v Speaker 6>podcast about couple's therapy with Haley, and I'm hoping she

0:39:58.400 --> 0:40:00.440
<v Speaker 6>can speak more about the benefits she saw from it.

0:40:00.719 --> 0:40:03.000
<v Speaker 6>I feel like my boyfriend and I've been bickering NonStop

0:40:03.000 --> 0:40:05.680
<v Speaker 6>about small things. How do you start couples therapy without

0:40:05.680 --> 0:40:07.440
<v Speaker 6>it feeling like the beginning of the end or a

0:40:07.520 --> 0:40:10.160
<v Speaker 6>last ditch effort. I feel like we would benefit from it,

0:40:10.160 --> 0:40:12.040
<v Speaker 6>but I'm afraid it will feel like we're admitting defeat.

0:40:12.440 --> 0:40:13.440
<v Speaker 5>That's a really good question.

0:40:13.480 --> 0:40:15.520
<v Speaker 2>I think it really is. And to be honest, when

0:40:15.680 --> 0:40:18.480
<v Speaker 2>we for Haley is the one who brought up couple therapy,

0:40:18.520 --> 0:40:21.560
<v Speaker 2>and I was like, so, basically, our relationship is over,

0:40:21.800 --> 0:40:24.920
<v Speaker 2>Like couples therapy to me meant like this is the end,

0:40:25.200 --> 0:40:28.280
<v Speaker 2>like the beginning of the end, And it was actually

0:40:28.360 --> 0:40:33.239
<v Speaker 2>the opposite because I our issue Haley and I, just

0:40:33.320 --> 0:40:36.080
<v Speaker 2>in a broad way of describing it, is that we

0:40:36.120 --> 0:40:40.120
<v Speaker 2>communicate very differently, so like we see things differently. We

0:40:40.160 --> 0:40:42.800
<v Speaker 2>have different perspectives on certain things, and so when we argue,

0:40:42.840 --> 0:40:44.680
<v Speaker 2>it's like I think that I'm right and she thinks

0:40:44.680 --> 0:40:46.920
<v Speaker 2>that she's right, just because we see the world differently,

0:40:47.480 --> 0:40:50.480
<v Speaker 2>and so couple therapy was just a way for us

0:40:50.560 --> 0:40:53.920
<v Speaker 2>to learn how to communicate that was productive as opposed

0:40:53.960 --> 0:40:57.560
<v Speaker 2>to getting into a place where I, at the time

0:40:57.680 --> 0:40:59.799
<v Speaker 2>was very avoidant and would shut down and like one

0:41:00.200 --> 0:41:02.400
<v Speaker 2>want to talk about things, and then she would like

0:41:02.480 --> 0:41:04.440
<v Speaker 2>push me up against the wall be like I need

0:41:04.440 --> 0:41:06.080
<v Speaker 2>to talk about it. I want to talk about it.

0:41:06.120 --> 0:41:07.680
<v Speaker 2>So it was like getting to a place where we

0:41:07.680 --> 0:41:11.400
<v Speaker 2>were able to honor each other's like what we needed

0:41:11.440 --> 0:41:15.080
<v Speaker 2>in those moments, but also have productive conversations that we're

0:41:15.120 --> 0:41:20.000
<v Speaker 2>able to get to a place of like just understanding

0:41:20.040 --> 0:41:23.200
<v Speaker 2>each other a little bit better. But I for me

0:41:23.440 --> 0:41:26.120
<v Speaker 2>when I agreed to do it, because I genuinely was like, Okay,

0:41:26.160 --> 0:41:27.640
<v Speaker 2>I guess this is the end, if we're having to

0:41:27.680 --> 0:41:30.320
<v Speaker 2>go to couple therapy. I was like, well, at least

0:41:30.440 --> 0:41:32.200
<v Speaker 2>if we end, I can be like we did everything

0:41:32.280 --> 0:41:35.800
<v Speaker 2>we could. So I think sometimes I could think couple therapy,

0:41:35.880 --> 0:41:38.360
<v Speaker 2>Like for Haley and I, it's been very beneficial and

0:41:38.400 --> 0:41:40.479
<v Speaker 2>helped us a lot. And I think sometimes maybe couple

0:41:40.600 --> 0:41:43.120
<v Speaker 2>therapy you get into it and maybe it's like, oh,

0:41:43.200 --> 0:41:46.040
<v Speaker 2>we're not compatible, or like we can't get to a

0:41:46.040 --> 0:41:48.080
<v Speaker 2>place where we can make this work. But I think

0:41:48.120 --> 0:41:51.560
<v Speaker 2>either way, it's such a it's such a helpful way

0:41:51.640 --> 0:41:55.160
<v Speaker 2>to learn about each other and also have someone who's

0:41:55.239 --> 0:41:59.160
<v Speaker 2>not biased towards either person, who can help navigate and

0:41:59.200 --> 0:42:00.640
<v Speaker 2>see it from a different perspective.

0:42:00.840 --> 0:42:03.120
<v Speaker 1>And even if that seems too daunting for you to do,

0:42:03.200 --> 0:42:07.040
<v Speaker 1>like couples therapy, maybe even encouraging your partner to do

0:42:07.160 --> 0:42:09.560
<v Speaker 1>therapy on their own and you do therapy on your own,

0:42:09.600 --> 0:42:13.520
<v Speaker 1>because I think that therapy in general has just been

0:42:13.560 --> 0:42:16.480
<v Speaker 1>so eye opening for me, because I think everybody kind

0:42:16.480 --> 0:42:19.600
<v Speaker 1>of has that complex of like I'm amazing.

0:42:19.680 --> 0:42:22.240
<v Speaker 3>I have all the answers. I know what I'm doing,

0:42:22.320 --> 0:42:22.839
<v Speaker 3>you know what I mean?

0:42:22.840 --> 0:42:23.400
<v Speaker 2>Like we all have.

0:42:23.680 --> 0:42:25.239
<v Speaker 1>We all think what we do and how we live

0:42:25.280 --> 0:42:27.400
<v Speaker 1>our lives is the best way because that's how we

0:42:27.440 --> 0:42:30.359
<v Speaker 1>live it and it's just not the case. And I

0:42:30.400 --> 0:42:34.520
<v Speaker 1>think a therapist can really open your eyes to that

0:42:35.400 --> 0:42:36.719
<v Speaker 1>because I think for me.

0:42:39.040 --> 0:42:40.560
<v Speaker 3>Specifically, I had this like.

0:42:40.719 --> 0:42:44.680
<v Speaker 1>Pie in the sky vision of what like love, relationship,

0:42:44.760 --> 0:42:47.320
<v Speaker 1>marriage was, you know, like it was that image that

0:42:47.360 --> 0:42:49.359
<v Speaker 1>we see on TV the white horse and he's going

0:42:49.400 --> 0:42:51.080
<v Speaker 1>to put the glass slipper on my foot and it's

0:42:51.080 --> 0:42:53.239
<v Speaker 1>going to be this fairy tale. And so when we

0:42:53.239 --> 0:42:56.440
<v Speaker 1>had to start dealing with like really hard things, like

0:42:56.480 --> 0:43:00.440
<v Speaker 1>things that just happen in life, I couldn't like raptionalize

0:43:00.440 --> 0:43:02.319
<v Speaker 1>with it. I couldn't understand it. I was just like, no,

0:43:02.360 --> 0:43:04.200
<v Speaker 1>it's not supposed to be hard. It's not supposed to

0:43:04.239 --> 0:43:06.839
<v Speaker 1>be like this. It's supposed to be easy. Relationships are

0:43:06.840 --> 0:43:08.680
<v Speaker 1>supposed to be your oasis. This is not supposed to

0:43:08.680 --> 0:43:12.239
<v Speaker 1>be something that we work on or work through. And

0:43:12.320 --> 0:43:14.759
<v Speaker 1>so that was like very life changing for me to

0:43:14.880 --> 0:43:17.439
<v Speaker 1>kind of open my eyes and see it through that way.

0:43:17.520 --> 0:43:18.880
<v Speaker 1>So I feel like, maybe if you don't want to

0:43:18.920 --> 0:43:21.400
<v Speaker 1>go to couple's therapy quite yet, maybe you guys can

0:43:21.440 --> 0:43:23.799
<v Speaker 1>both just do your own individual therapy and you can

0:43:23.840 --> 0:43:24.399
<v Speaker 1>get there too.

0:43:25.560 --> 0:43:26.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think that's good advice.

0:43:26.760 --> 0:43:28.319
<v Speaker 6>It's I used to think the same thing. Why would

0:43:28.360 --> 0:43:31.960
<v Speaker 6>anybody dating go to couple therapy just break up? It's fine, somebody,

0:43:31.960 --> 0:43:33.759
<v Speaker 6>you don't beat therapy with it. I totally I've done

0:43:33.760 --> 0:43:34.600
<v Speaker 6>a full one eighty on it.

0:43:34.640 --> 0:43:34.960
<v Speaker 5>I get it.

0:43:34.960 --> 0:43:37.759
<v Speaker 6>It's about learning to communicate with each Yeah, because any

0:43:37.760 --> 0:43:41.439
<v Speaker 6>two humans are just different people. And like you said,

0:43:41.480 --> 0:43:43.399
<v Speaker 6>you think your way is the best way and everything's great,

0:43:43.400 --> 0:43:47.080
<v Speaker 6>and they do too, and so that's where naturally conflict, right, yes, yeah,

0:43:47.239 --> 0:43:48.840
<v Speaker 6>and this helps you deal with conflict.

0:43:49.040 --> 0:43:52.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because I will say, like it'll be like Haley

0:43:52.840 --> 0:43:55.839
<v Speaker 2>stands on something in mine and we're both like our

0:43:56.040 --> 0:43:58.360
<v Speaker 2>heels are dug in, Like neither one of us is

0:43:58.440 --> 0:44:00.319
<v Speaker 2>changing how we feel. But it's like, how do we

0:44:00.360 --> 0:44:02.400
<v Speaker 2>get to a place where we go Okay, I see

0:44:02.480 --> 0:44:04.279
<v Speaker 2>why you feel that way, or you see how I

0:44:04.320 --> 0:44:07.560
<v Speaker 2>feel that way. And yeah, I used to think the

0:44:07.600 --> 0:44:10.160
<v Speaker 2>same thing, couple couple stadium, Like damn, if you all

0:44:10.160 --> 0:44:10.759
<v Speaker 2>are already in.

0:44:12.360 --> 0:44:13.759
<v Speaker 3>Break up, if you have a problem like break up,

0:44:13.800 --> 0:44:15.520
<v Speaker 3>you're not in it, you know. But it's true. It's

0:44:15.520 --> 0:44:17.000
<v Speaker 3>like again, you could do that.

0:44:17.040 --> 0:44:19.000
<v Speaker 1>You could break when things get hard, you could break

0:44:19.040 --> 0:44:20.560
<v Speaker 1>up and you're gonna date somebody else and then things

0:44:20.560 --> 0:44:22.680
<v Speaker 1>are gonna get hard again, you know. But it's not

0:44:22.680 --> 0:44:24.880
<v Speaker 1>even like it doesn't even be something so hard. It

0:44:24.880 --> 0:44:27.680
<v Speaker 1>could just be like lifestuck, you know. Like I remember

0:44:28.320 --> 0:44:30.759
<v Speaker 1>when we first started kind of integrating and I was

0:44:30.800 --> 0:44:33.840
<v Speaker 1>living more at Robbie's house. The way we live is

0:44:33.960 --> 0:44:36.480
<v Speaker 1>very different in terms of just like cleanliness and you know,

0:44:36.560 --> 0:44:38.879
<v Speaker 1>like things like that, and with kids involved. I never

0:44:38.960 --> 0:44:41.239
<v Speaker 1>had kids involved in where I lived, so it was

0:44:41.280 --> 0:44:43.839
<v Speaker 1>like a really having to like hear him out.

0:44:43.880 --> 0:44:45.279
<v Speaker 3>He needed to hear me out. And then we came

0:44:45.320 --> 0:44:47.080
<v Speaker 3>to a compromise, you know, and it's like neither one

0:44:47.080 --> 0:44:48.040
<v Speaker 3>of us is right or wrong.

0:44:48.400 --> 0:44:49.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's just the way we prefer.

0:44:49.600 --> 0:44:52.880
<v Speaker 1>To live, and we came to like a good middle

0:44:52.880 --> 0:44:54.719
<v Speaker 1>ground with it, you know. So it's just like hearing

0:44:54.760 --> 0:44:55.319
<v Speaker 1>each other out.

0:44:55.520 --> 0:44:57.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, speaking of you moved to the.

0:44:57.560 --> 0:44:59.960
<v Speaker 3>Office movement, dude, that was a big deal.

0:45:00.200 --> 0:45:05.160
<v Speaker 2>The stude has been moved a big move in the relationship. Yes,

0:45:05.520 --> 0:45:09.200
<v Speaker 2>you've been preparing that space for a while now.

0:45:09.520 --> 0:45:13.120
<v Speaker 1>Yes, I've been, yes, digging my heels, but I felt

0:45:13.160 --> 0:45:15.879
<v Speaker 1>like I'm taking advantage of this week.

0:45:15.920 --> 0:45:16.239
<v Speaker 3>We have.

0:45:17.880 --> 0:45:20.200
<v Speaker 1>Have some downtime with the morning show to actually like

0:45:21.000 --> 0:45:22.200
<v Speaker 1>have my studio moved.

0:45:22.280 --> 0:45:24.880
<v Speaker 3>So I did it. I moved all the pieces last Weekend.

0:45:24.880 --> 0:45:27.319
<v Speaker 1>Tubs is coming into my house tomorrow to set it

0:45:27.360 --> 0:45:29.360
<v Speaker 1>all up and we're gonna be up and running.

0:45:29.440 --> 0:45:31.319
<v Speaker 2>Congrats the wi fi set up.

0:45:31.400 --> 0:45:34.200
<v Speaker 3>The WiFi is set up. Yeah, yeah, we're here. Here,

0:45:34.239 --> 0:45:34.520
<v Speaker 3>we are.

0:45:34.719 --> 0:45:35.120
<v Speaker 1>Well.

0:45:35.520 --> 0:45:36.759
<v Speaker 3>I haven't officially moved yet.

0:45:36.840 --> 0:45:39.440
<v Speaker 1>I still have my place, but yeah, yeah, yeah, just

0:45:39.480 --> 0:45:40.520
<v Speaker 1>the studio.

0:45:40.600 --> 0:45:41.760
<v Speaker 3>Dude, the stude has moved.

0:45:43.440 --> 0:45:47.880
<v Speaker 2>We have a Thursday episode, Yes, we do. Do you

0:45:47.920 --> 0:45:48.839
<v Speaker 2>want to talk about him?

0:45:49.080 --> 0:45:52.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm very pumped because you know, he's no stranger to

0:45:52.560 --> 0:45:57.080
<v Speaker 1>the o R. He's been in ther before, but never

0:45:57.120 --> 0:45:59.440
<v Speaker 1>in person like this, and I just find him to

0:45:59.480 --> 0:46:06.279
<v Speaker 1>be such a inspiring, captivating, well rounded human being. And

0:46:06.400 --> 0:46:08.880
<v Speaker 1>I'm really pumped that Devon Franklin is going to be

0:46:08.960 --> 0:46:09.640
<v Speaker 1>joining us.

0:46:11.719 --> 0:46:12.880
<v Speaker 3>Fellow author.

0:46:14.239 --> 0:46:16.759
<v Speaker 1>I remember, actually I was when we were going to

0:46:16.760 --> 0:46:19.680
<v Speaker 1>get our endorsements for the book. Devon is somebody that

0:46:19.680 --> 0:46:22.040
<v Speaker 1>I've really admired, especially in the writing space. I've read

0:46:22.239 --> 0:46:24.279
<v Speaker 1>most of all of his books, and so he's just

0:46:24.320 --> 0:46:27.480
<v Speaker 1>somebody that I really, I really his endorsement on my

0:46:27.560 --> 0:46:30.359
<v Speaker 1>book was really important to me. But I was so

0:46:30.400 --> 0:46:34.000
<v Speaker 1>scared to ask him because like we're not friends. We're friendly,

0:46:34.200 --> 0:46:36.760
<v Speaker 1>but we're you know, we're not close by any means.

0:46:36.800 --> 0:46:38.279
<v Speaker 1>And so I was so nervous and I wasn't going

0:46:38.320 --> 0:46:39.560
<v Speaker 1>to do it because I was like the fear of

0:46:39.560 --> 0:46:42.279
<v Speaker 1>the rejection if he like didn't respond or he didn't

0:46:42.280 --> 0:46:43.560
<v Speaker 1>want to do it, you know, Like I was like

0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:46.880
<v Speaker 1>just going down that path. And he was so gracious

0:46:46.880 --> 0:46:48.759
<v Speaker 1>and was so excited to do it, and so like

0:46:48.840 --> 0:46:51.000
<v Speaker 1>his reaction to that made me love him even more.

0:46:52.680 --> 0:46:54.680
<v Speaker 1>So that was like really nice.

0:46:54.880 --> 0:46:57.520
<v Speaker 2>Well, I'm so excited to meet him in person. Yeah,

0:46:57.520 --> 0:47:00.360
<v Speaker 2>So we'll be back Thursday with Devon Franklin and we

0:47:00.440 --> 0:47:02.200
<v Speaker 2>hope you have a wonderful week and we love you.

0:47:02.280 --> 0:47:03.680
<v Speaker 2>Somebody love you. Bye bye.

0:47:09.280 --> 0:47:12.840
<v Speaker 1>M m hm