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Speaker 1: Yeah, rapp right up podcast, Ellie Wilson, be that what's up?

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Speaker 1: You got? St? John? A Bars Elliott will I like

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Speaker 1: this luxurious some luxurious ship. And I've never been on

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Speaker 1: this college before. All for you, St. John. I feel good.

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Speaker 1: I feel like I should have been here, but I'm

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Speaker 1: here now. I ain't gonna sing here in my heart.

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Speaker 1: Let my heart feel how my heart feels. I've been

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Speaker 1: working hard, right, I've been working hard. I put out

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Speaker 1: a project where you said it's a selfish project, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: because it's for me. I put out the records. I've

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Speaker 1: believe in the things that like. I'm living on my

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Speaker 1: own terms, which is a rare situation of being right.

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Speaker 1: I put out Collection one. That's how I think of music.

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Speaker 1: It's a body of it's a collection. It's my first offering.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna like this record in the summer. This record

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Speaker 1: is gonna fit you better in the winter. This is

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Speaker 1: a fall record, and I understand that it's like any

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Speaker 1: other collection, right, you can't wear it all at the

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Speaker 1: same time, and you shouldn't have to. I got options

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Speaker 1: for you, you you know. So it's a selfish project because

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Speaker 1: these are the things that I thought. Listen there's no adjustments,

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Speaker 1: nobody making any other impactful decisions. I said the whole

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Speaker 1: what is it like to be like because the end

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Speaker 1: of the day, you're like, You've done so much to

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Speaker 1: help other people behind the scenes to finally execute your vision.

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Speaker 1: How how powerful did that feel for you? It's a

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Speaker 1: victory for all the niggas like me, all the camps,

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Speaker 1: show me, all the cameras. It's a victor to breathe.

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Speaker 1: Family is a win because just you know, working from

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Speaker 1: behind the scenes having ideas, right, imagine watching your idea

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Speaker 1: die every time. It's like, um, they invented the plane, right,

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Speaker 1: and every plane that they invented they believed in so

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Speaker 1: like feverishly, and they were like, this is the plane,

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Speaker 1: and it goes up and the bitch comes crashing down

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Speaker 1: and you're like, damn, fam can I get one? Can

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Speaker 1: I catch one? So it's like a victory. It's like

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Speaker 1: watching the plane that you believed in this whole time

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Speaker 1: take off and it's my original design. See if I'm

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Speaker 1: the niggative invented the plane, this is actually my original design.

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Speaker 1: And I went through twenty other iterations just to go

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Speaker 1: back to the first. You love that like breaking all conventions,

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Speaker 1: like was a singer the way you dressed? Like do

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Speaker 1: you love that part of it that, like you knew

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Speaker 1: from jump that you use somebody is just gonna shake

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Speaker 1: it up and you're not really trying to fit into

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Speaker 1: a box and like challenge, challenge what views are, what

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Speaker 1: what a rap star music stars should look like? And absolutely, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I believe. Look, I believe that the only way to

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Speaker 1: make impact is to make impact. Indentations and impressions have

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Speaker 1: to happen. I live and I see the world the

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Speaker 1: same way I've always seen the world. But I'm the

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Speaker 1: guy I've always wanted to be. That's a fucking miracle,

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Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. A lot of people are

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Speaker 1: in positions that you might um think of wonderful you

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Speaker 1: you might celebrate, but they're they're not on their own

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Speaker 1: a court that sounds like I'm in church right now.

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Speaker 1: They're there. But why do you think you're able to

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Speaker 1: have that so strong when you see so much of

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Speaker 1: the opposite. You see people literally struggling with fame, struggling

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Speaker 1: with finances. Everything plays out depression, you know, it gets

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Speaker 1: so expressed in the music. Why do you think you've

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Speaker 1: been able to like you almost countering that in a

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Speaker 1: sense of like, I think I've just been deliberate. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna be honest with you. I don't know from extra

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Speaker 1: special have extra special conditioning. I think I just decided

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Speaker 1: nothing else fit me. It didn't wear. I couldn't wear

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Speaker 1: that as well as they could wear that. For instance,

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Speaker 1: I can't be you better than you can. I'm really

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Speaker 1: good at being myself, so I figured, if I'm really

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Speaker 1: great at being myself, why not be that. So when

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Speaker 1: I saw that you're really great being yourself as l

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Speaker 1: A read man, you signed with Hitko, but wasn't like

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Speaker 1: working with you know, such a legendary you know guy

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Speaker 1: in the game, those meetings like those L A read

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Speaker 1: meetings a legendary. I think we have a we have

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Speaker 1: a unique relationship where we just I mentally respect each other.

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Speaker 1: He's done so much, he's done so much for the culture,

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Speaker 1: black music, and listen, you don't even have to say

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Speaker 1: anything so that you don't have to top that off

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Speaker 1: with a Chevy. That's just what it is. So to

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Speaker 1: be in the same room with someone that has such

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Speaker 1: a tremendous legacy and they're like, I think you're special,

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Speaker 1: that's read you know what, because it was instant when

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Speaker 1: you play l A your music and the way he'd

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Speaker 1: be vibe into your music. What was that like us

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Speaker 1: not see he has, he dances, he does, He's just

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Speaker 1: being a he likes it. Wasn't familiar with some of

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Speaker 1: the records. He may have been I think one of

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Speaker 1: two records. And then because no one had heard Collection one,

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Speaker 1: no one knew all the types of things that I

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Speaker 1: would be able to do, all the types of songs

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Speaker 1: i'd make, you know, I put out Roses and I

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Speaker 1: put out reflex in three below, and those were like really,

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Speaker 1: you know, specific samples i'd be probably didn't know I

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Speaker 1: would do a record like selfish or you know, something

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Speaker 1: that's introspective, like God Bless the Internet. So him hearing

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Speaker 1: the length and breath of it, like the whole body

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Speaker 1: of it, that was really impressive to see because it

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Speaker 1: was somebody that had no idea what was going on

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Speaker 1: from the inception, just sort of thrown just taking apart

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Speaker 1: just by music in a new way that he hadn't heard.

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Speaker 1: I heard you got too Lit last night. I see

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Speaker 1: the I G is always popping. I live an interesting life.

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Speaker 1: I live really I literally just let young lady and

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Speaker 1: your Instagram feed over once in a while. Every once

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Speaker 1: in a while, Look, I'm about I like to help

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Speaker 1: promote self esteem to me, that's true. So for it,

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Speaker 1: married right, belong to myself in the world. Actually that's

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Speaker 1: not true. You actually belong to the Christian sex club.

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Speaker 1: Can you explain thing? He got the whole My mother

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Speaker 1: might be watching the Christian sex Club. I think, Look,

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Speaker 1: it's sort of self explain to her, right, Christian sex club. Right,

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Speaker 1: there's a hypocrisy to it, as a novelty to it,

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Speaker 1: and it's a charm to it. And I like to

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Speaker 1: exist on all of those borders right there. That's a

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Speaker 1: triangle for me, all right. I grew up. You know,

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Speaker 1: my mom is she's um. She studied metaphysics, she practices

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Speaker 1: metaphysics as my grandmother. So lots of things I was

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Speaker 1: taught early. I went through all the religions, not all

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Speaker 1: of them, but I went through you know, Catholic, Baptist, Pentecostal.

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Speaker 1: So I got to make up my mind based on

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Speaker 1: the information I had at the time. Those experiences. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so you know, I get a sense of what's going

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Speaker 1: on in the world, like I really understand what's happening.

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Speaker 1: So when you see Christian Sex Club, you get it.

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Speaker 1: I'm I'm here clothing line too, though, you know what

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Speaker 1: I'm saying. Yeah, yeah, that man, you know, and I

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Speaker 1: got you. I don't even know how much I got you. This,

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Speaker 1: this silks, this leathers. Listen, we're doing this thing called

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Speaker 1: sex suits. Man, when you see him, you're gonna thank me.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna text me, But like, thank you so much.

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Speaker 1: You understand, you really get it like I do. Last

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Speaker 1: night story, oh to the last night. It was my

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Speaker 1: birthday and you know my girl at the time signor

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Speaker 1: it's ignorant on my birthday kind of my birthday sign this.

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Speaker 1: My birthday was six days ago and I took a

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Speaker 1: bunch of my team and we went to um we

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Speaker 1: were in Croatia. I took him to Croatia, just got

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Speaker 1: on the plane. Yeah that's how you should, man, you

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Speaker 1: should live exactly how you want. I gotta sign a

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Speaker 1: hit cold man. Whoa money? Huh? I like money. Money's good. Um.

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Speaker 1: So last year we were doing my girl threw me

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Speaker 1: a party. My girl at the time, she threw me

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Speaker 1: a party. This is a surprise birthday party. And I'm

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Speaker 1: in the edibles. I don't smoke that. I like edibles.

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Speaker 1: So we got this massive cake with one of the

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Speaker 1: artwork from the Christian sex club line. It's like a

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Speaker 1: nun given priest to blow job. God. Hey, it's facts.

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Speaker 1: It's on the shirt, right, signorant. So she got it

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Speaker 1: on the cake and then my home girl didn't know

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Speaker 1: it was a weed cake. Everybody else was eating a

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Speaker 1: week they understood what was happening. She was like, Oh,

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Speaker 1: this is delicious. I like this. I'm like, good luck.

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Speaker 1: You see how this goes for you. So I hit

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Speaker 1: it the next day and the first thing that I

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Speaker 1: texted I was like, yo, I heard you got too

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Speaker 1: little last night. I was in the studio sitting on

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Speaker 1: the couch. We're pulling it with playing with the synth line,

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Speaker 1: and I texted, I heard you got too little last night.

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Speaker 1: I even look at her. I didn't even look for

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Speaker 1: her response. I like, cool, le let's go, because you

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Speaker 1: know it's in the moments, right, The magic is in

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Speaker 1: the moment. That's it. And I was just a moment

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Speaker 1: and it was insane, and I just I told that story.

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Speaker 1: That's one of my favorite tracks on the project, and

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Speaker 1: you know, I'd like to beat a lot. And what's

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Speaker 1: funny is that I saw on Twitter that you said

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Speaker 1: that you never turned down a bad beat. But I

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Speaker 1: didn't understand with that because most of the pea sound good.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean by that? It was no, no,

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Speaker 1: no to be I said, to be a SoundCloud to

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Speaker 1: be a great SoundCloud rapper, you have to be able

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Speaker 1: to turn down every bad beat or something like that.

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Speaker 1: You know, it's just yeah, the provocative nature of you know,

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Speaker 1: poking fun at that because you know, some of that

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Speaker 1: beats are terrible, some of them. Some of them it's

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Speaker 1: just awful, like god awful. Right, But there's even though

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Speaker 1: it's a child too, I gotta swing to it, And

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Speaker 1: I'm like, whoa fam do you even know how to

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Speaker 1: use this software? It's like he's pressing all the keys

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Speaker 1: at the same time I rap on it. That's be

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Speaker 1: a fantas. How do you sud how do you decide

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Speaker 1: what you're gonna hop on? Because here it's like no

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Speaker 1: to St John's song sound alike? Almost Yeah, I build

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Speaker 1: them from scratch, so we we build everything from scratch.

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Speaker 1: So I worked like almost exclusively with this producer named

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Speaker 1: Falling and when I'm in the studio, it's it's army drill,

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Speaker 1: practice this again every day, like we never did it before,

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Speaker 1: Like none of our songs are good. I'm like, I

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Speaker 1: don't care what happened yesterday. Let me hear it, and

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Speaker 1: we're starting from scratch, and I'll write or create from anything,

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Speaker 1: cause I'm just all I'm looking for is magic, fan

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Speaker 1: any creative is looking for. It's like that sparkle, the magic,

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Speaker 1: and you find it and you stretch it out and

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Speaker 1: you turn it into to entire campus. So I'll start

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Speaker 1: with I might just hear drums. It might just be

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Speaker 1: a simple loop, like really unimpressive loop. But if I

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Speaker 1: can hear it in my head, I'm not gonna articulate it,

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Speaker 1: then I can build around it. So i might do

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Speaker 1: a melody, and then I'll say, put this synth line here,

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Speaker 1: and they'll change the cynth line, they'll change the way

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Speaker 1: I approach it. So everything is customed. What do you

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Speaker 1: get out of performing? Because I saw he's obviously just

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Speaker 1: sets down here that my a. But I saw something

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Speaker 1: you said he was like in two countries and and

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Speaker 1: he was on the outside show and got caught in

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Speaker 1: the pouring rain before. Yeah, so I did just this

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Speaker 1: past week, like right before my birthday. I was in

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Speaker 1: Germany and Amsterdam on the same day, right, So I

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Speaker 1: did two festivals, Encore Festival in uh in Germany and Amsterdam.

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Speaker 1: I did hype actually still reverse anyway, there were two

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Speaker 1: hours apart from one another. Literally. So I went on

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Speaker 1: the stage in Amsterdam. First, it's pouring rain. It's pouring rain.

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Speaker 1: And the act who went on before me, they murdered it.

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Speaker 1: Everyone was going off. The crowd was enormous. I got

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Speaker 1: on stage, and because they just started pouring rain, nobody

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Speaker 1: was built to prepare for it. There were fifty people

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Speaker 1: on my stage, right, that's a fact, right, And I

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Speaker 1: won't alter my life or just it. I'm really here

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Speaker 1: in this present moment. However it happened, how it happened

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Speaker 1: was documented. I'll tell you the whole story. Fifty people

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Speaker 1: at the set, but I didn't make that made no

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Speaker 1: difference to me. I was here in a place where

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Speaker 1: I've never been in my whole life. I dreamt about

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Speaker 1: moments like this. I don't care two of y'all. When

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Speaker 1: your grandmother showed up, I hope she will. Yeah, she

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Speaker 1: got off a pedic song because it's about to get lit.

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Speaker 1: So I went in. I just I never performed in

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Speaker 1: the rain. I didn't hang back under the hanging I

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Speaker 1: was outside. I was in the ray was pouring on

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Speaker 1: all of us, and the rain started to slow down

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Speaker 1: and it got enormous and it was more people in

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Speaker 1: my eyes because set back out. Yeah, but I got

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Speaker 1: off that stage five minutes after. I was in a

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Speaker 1: car driving to Germany. I got off the two hour

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Speaker 1: drive right as soon as I got off stage. Five

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Speaker 1: minutes later, I was on the next stage. So I've

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Speaker 1: never done that before. Two shows, two countries, two hours apart.

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Speaker 1: Like I'm not even making up these numbers. It's real,

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Speaker 1: like it's just hopping. And I went in. I did

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Speaker 1: it again. I care. I just perform it for me.

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Speaker 1: It's a different outlet. It's the expressive portion of the art. Right.

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Speaker 1: You make the music and I internalized it, and I'll

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Speaker 1: make it for myself or I make it for you,

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Speaker 1: depending on how I'm making it, and you get to

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Speaker 1: hear it and it's audio format and then I could

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Speaker 1: give you the fucking televised version. It's different. It's like

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Speaker 1: a screenplay in person where I can tell you the

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Speaker 1: story of it, because no one. You don't know the

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Speaker 1: origins of records, right, You don't know that I might

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Speaker 1: have written like selfish, which I wish we were both

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Speaker 1: somebody else so we wouldn't be somebody else's. You know,

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Speaker 1: I wrote that about some girl and I'm a friend

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Speaker 1: with and she can't be with me because I'm in

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Speaker 1: a situation, and I can't be with her because she

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Speaker 1: got a long term situation. But I can tell you

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Speaker 1: when I'm on stage, I can tell you where it

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Speaker 1: came from, or reflex, and I was that moment a reflex.

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Speaker 1: I was in Fallen's bedroom. We were just sitting I

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Speaker 1: was in his bedroom. We're trying to figure it out.

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Speaker 1: I think maybe I had just written usher record and

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Speaker 1: we were just trying to figure out what we wanted

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Speaker 1: to do next. And I remember thinking about all the

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Speaker 1: things that I've been through and trying to picture where

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Speaker 1: I was gonna go next. I was like pitching me, bawling,

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Speaker 1: pitching me with the fifth and Hendy something far and

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Speaker 1: pitching me right around here in the Benzo, pitching me

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Speaker 1: blunting with the tints on the window, like you know,

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Speaker 1: I can see about the looks of it. They got

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Speaker 1: the feeling. I told him, bitches, I'm something they should

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Speaker 1: believe in. I told my mama, they can't reach me

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Speaker 1: at the ceiling. This is only the beginning. This is preseason.

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Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. It just about it. When

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Speaker 1: I'm here, it's one on one. You can understand. You

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Speaker 1: can understand these back on tile down Man. Appreciate you

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Speaker 1: taking a thank you guys success. Hold. Look, this is

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Speaker 1: a legendary one of my first time the Amen podcast. Yeah,