Speaker 1: Hi everyone, I'm Katie Curic, and this is next question.
Speaker 1: I really like Kelly Rippa, and I'm guessing some of
Speaker 1: you listening really like her too. After all, she has
Speaker 1: been welcomed into living rooms, bedrooms, kitchens, and morning routines
Speaker 1: for more than two decades as the co host of
Speaker 1: ABC's morning talk show Live first with Regis Bilbiny Times
Speaker 1: Do Dynamic Duo, then with Michael Strahan, There's Live and
Speaker 1: now with Ryan Seacrest, Good Morning, Good Morning. On the
Speaker 1: show and in person, Kelly has always been funny, warm
Speaker 1: and self effacing, and it turns out she's exactly the
Speaker 1: same way as a writer. Her first book, a collection
Speaker 1: of memoir ish essays called Live Wire, Long Witted Short Stories,
Speaker 1: is out now, and we have such a fun time
Speaker 1: chatting about her career, her family, and the curious ways
Speaker 1: our worlds and jobs have overlapped. So enjoy. Can I
Speaker 1: just say, I'm so excited to see you. I loved
Speaker 1: your book. Thank you. How meaningful it is when someone says,
Speaker 1: sincerely and honestly that they loved your book because I
Speaker 1: felt like I got to know you better. I just
Speaker 1: really enjoyed being in your world. I thought you were
Speaker 1: so funny because well, obviously you're really funny. Your last
Speaker 1: chapters honestly made me cry because made me think of
Speaker 1: my kids. You write all about Cindy walking off and
Speaker 1: kind of being in this space of your life as
Speaker 1: an empty nester. So I'm really I'm really excited to
Speaker 1: be here to talk to you about it. And I
Speaker 1: think one of the things, one of the many things
Speaker 1: I learned about you in the book, Kelly, is that
Speaker 1: you're actually introverted, um, and you're shy, and you don't
Speaker 1: really love social occasions. And then I thought about the times,
Speaker 1: you know, the occasions I have had the opportunity to
Speaker 1: be with you socially, and I thought, oh, that's so funny,
Speaker 1: because Kelly is actually kind of shy and and and
Speaker 1: not super um outgoing at these at these things. And
Speaker 1: it made me realize, you know, everybody's sort of insecure,
Speaker 1: and I feel shy sometimes at these I do I
Speaker 1: feel um, you know, I I feel once in a
Speaker 1: while kind of just uncomfortable in my skin, or you know,
Speaker 1: or people do I have somebody to talk to? You know,
Speaker 1: all those things that I think everybody feels, no matter
Speaker 1: who you are. But the fact that that you're kind
Speaker 1: of agoraphobic. Actually, what was was really surprising to me.
Speaker 1: It's funny, I almost as you now know from knowing me.
Speaker 1: I think that the two times I went out this year,
Speaker 1: you were at both both events big events. Um, I
Speaker 1: am really just a home body. Um, I come from
Speaker 1: a family of home bodies. It's I think it's definitely
Speaker 1: like a hereditary skill set. But I also think it's
Speaker 1: sort of how you're wired, don't you. Yeah, I'm hard
Speaker 1: wired to just prefer the comfort of under my bed,
Speaker 1: I mean under the sheets, I mean hiding under my bed.
Speaker 1: But I also would think, Kelly, so much of your
Speaker 1: job is being out there and being outspoken and being
Speaker 1: and sharing that when you have your alone time, you
Speaker 1: don't necessarily want to be like black. Yeah, I just
Speaker 1: feel like there's uh as you know, when you host
Speaker 1: a morning show, you're in people's houses every day. They
Speaker 1: get to see you. You know. I think it is
Speaker 1: high honored to be welcomed into people's living rooms and
Speaker 1: breakfast tables. Still in this day and age, with so
Speaker 1: many other options. The fact that we are still chugging
Speaker 1: away and we're still there and people are still welcoming
Speaker 1: us is a high honor. I don't take that for granted.
Speaker 1: It's not lost on me that there are so many
Speaker 1: other choices they could make, but they still tune in
Speaker 1: for us. But at the end of the day, I'm like, okay,
Speaker 1: and now people need a break from me. So I
Speaker 1: try to, you know, be as invisible as possible when
Speaker 1: I'm not there, you know what I mean. So I
Speaker 1: don't go to movie premiers and I don't go to
Speaker 1: fashion events, and I don't go to all of that
Speaker 1: stuff because I value my off time, but I also
Speaker 1: value like giving America needs a break. I don't know
Speaker 1: if people feel that way, but I think it's also
Speaker 1: because it's been very important for you to have some
Speaker 1: separation between your home life and your work life. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I've always prioritized my home life the most most because
Speaker 1: I feel like that's where my real work was. You know,
Speaker 1: I wanted to and I'm very much like you. I know,
Speaker 1: you and I were frequently the only moms at the
Speaker 1: track field, the only you felt like winter but it
Speaker 1: was fall and we'd be the only ones standing there.
Speaker 1: Because I feel like when you're a working woman and
Speaker 1: sometimes the morning routine you have to miss a lot.
Speaker 1: You are forced to miss a lot, so those events
Speaker 1: that you can attend, you are super attentive. Right And
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, I was really trying
Speaker 1: to raise good people, responsible people, conscientious people, and I
Speaker 1: feel like we are, you know, in that respect. Thank god.
Speaker 1: I take nothing for granted, but so far they've really
Speaker 1: held up their end of the bargain. Well, I like
Speaker 1: that that quote from Jackie Kennedy that says, if you
Speaker 1: bungle you raise and your kids, nothing else really matters.
Speaker 1: And it sounds like you and Mark have done a
Speaker 1: great job raising good human beings. We've been very fortunate,
Speaker 1: you know, but you well, I think it also put
Speaker 1: the work good Yeah, you put the work, and it
Speaker 1: comes from good parenting. And we had good parents. I mean,
Speaker 1: our parents are I mean, they're very lucky, and you're
Speaker 1: so lucky. Although your mom I wondered if she I
Speaker 1: felt like you didn't write about your mom that much,
Speaker 1: and and uh, and I I wish I had gotten
Speaker 1: a little more sense of your mom. You thanked her
Speaker 1: at the end of the book, but I thought it
Speaker 1: was funny when you told her you wanted you were
Speaker 1: going to go to therapy. She said, you're gonna spend
Speaker 1: a lot of money trashing me basically, basically, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well,
Speaker 1: I think generationally my mom was too. I think nobody
Speaker 1: even knew about therapy, much less talked about it from
Speaker 1: our parents generations. But I wondered if your mom like
Speaker 1: wanted you to write a little bit more about So
Speaker 1: I'll give you the heads up on my mom. Kelly
Speaker 1: gives us the lowdown on her mom and why she
Speaker 1: chose not to write about her in this book that's
Speaker 1: right after this, So I'll give you the heads up
Speaker 1: on my mom. Number one. Let me just say this
Speaker 1: is not a memoir. Have short stories. So you know,
Speaker 1: if I ever do, if I ever do crawl out
Speaker 1: of the whole of being overwhelmed from writing this book,
Speaker 1: of course I would write about my mom. In totality.
Speaker 1: My mom is very much like everything I wrote about her.
Speaker 1: I would read to her and then she'd be like,
Speaker 1: get rid of that, get rid of this, get rid
Speaker 1: of Like she didn't want me to talk about her
Speaker 1: at all. She's like she takes my introversion and turns
Speaker 1: it like a hundred degrees up. Um. But when I
Speaker 1: asked her, because we're currently living with my parents, right now,
Speaker 1: which is funny because she's great, she's doing so well.
Speaker 1: She had heart surgery, she's she's making such an amazing recovery.
Speaker 1: Her doctors and nurses have been extraordinary. And it's very
Speaker 1: funny because you go from empty nesters and then suddenly
Speaker 1: like your nest is full. But older people who are
Speaker 1: like them, it's so nice. It's nice for all of us.
Speaker 1: We're really enjoying their characters. And so I said to
Speaker 1: my mom, um, Mom, have you read my book yet?
Speaker 1: And she said, no, I'm not going to read your
Speaker 1: sex book. I said, what what are you talking about? What?
Speaker 1: I didn't write a sex book. She goes, well, not
Speaker 1: according and now right away, I know that my aunts
Speaker 1: are sending her the headlines right from whatever Google alert
Speaker 1: or whatever it is. Right So she said, you've written
Speaker 1: a sex book book, and I don't want to read
Speaker 1: about you doing you know what with you know who.
Speaker 1: And I said, it's not a sex book. As a
Speaker 1: matter of fact, there's very little sex in this book.
Speaker 1: It's just too advance a story in in the order
Speaker 1: in which it happened, and and and and I and
Speaker 1: there's a disclaimer at that chapter. If you're related to me,
Speaker 1: in any way, Please skip to the next chapter, don't
Speaker 1: read this. You know. So, I'm very conscientious in writing,
Speaker 1: but she proved my most challenging, almost as challenging as
Speaker 1: my daughter Lola, who wanted me to take out any
Speaker 1: and all references to her um But so you know
Speaker 1: it's I wrote this very thoughtfully with people in mind,
Speaker 1: and I didn't want to put in anything that they
Speaker 1: found objectionable. So you know, that's why there's not so
Speaker 1: much of my mom, because she was not funny. I
Speaker 1: don't know your mom, but I was like, I feel
Speaker 1: a little protective, I guess because of course I think
Speaker 1: you all obviously have this. This great my mom is.
Speaker 1: My mom is the probably the funniest person any of
Speaker 1: us will ever know. But I don't even think she
Speaker 1: thinks she's funny. She's being completely serious and deadpan about
Speaker 1: everything she says. Well, why you know, you say it's
Speaker 1: not a memoir, It is a collection of short stories,
Speaker 1: UM stories, And I love the title and this secondary title,
Speaker 1: whatever you call it. How did you find the connective
Speaker 1: tissue that would you know? First of all, I guess
Speaker 1: enabled you to pick what you were going to write about.
Speaker 1: But that would make sense for the reader. So there
Speaker 1: were two hundred more pages in this chapter, and a
Speaker 1: lot was cut out. I mean in the book, in
Speaker 1: the I mean in the in the book forgive me.
Speaker 1: In the book, there were two hundred more pages. So
Speaker 1: there's a lot that was taken out. My editor, Carrie Thornton,
Speaker 1: God love her, this woman. She stacked the book. I
Speaker 1: had the book completely stacked differently. I had it more
Speaker 1: chronological and in its order. And she said, let me
Speaker 1: stack these chapters the way I feel they connect, because
Speaker 1: you're too close to this book at this point. I
Speaker 1: really wanted to start backwards with the last chapter and
Speaker 1: work my way to the beginning. And she was like
Speaker 1: you now, because you've written, now you think you're also
Speaker 1: an editor and you don't know what you're doing. And
Speaker 1: I said, did you read the chapter on asshole syndrome?
Speaker 1: Now I'm an editor too. It's like anything I if
Speaker 1: I see it, then I believe that I can do it. Um.
Speaker 1: And I you know, having read so many great books
Speaker 1: by so many great authors, yours included, I you know,
Speaker 1: I mean, thank god, And I think I told you
Speaker 1: this when you came on my show. Thank God your
Speaker 1: book came out. When I had essentially finished my book,
Speaker 1: because if I had read your book, I wouldn't have
Speaker 1: written my book. Does that makes no? I wouldn't I would.
Speaker 1: I would have been like, I can't. I'll never read
Speaker 1: a decent word in my life. I'll never write anything decent.
Speaker 1: It's not good. It's not. But ignorance really is bliss sometimes,
Speaker 1: and so I like blissfully and ignorantly went into this
Speaker 1: saying I've read books, therefore I can write books. Well,
Speaker 1: you know, I think you sell your yourself short Kelly.
Speaker 1: First of all, I think you're really fun clever writer.
Speaker 1: I wish I had dog eared some of the pages
Speaker 1: because um, you know, it's very uniquely you. So I
Speaker 1: don't want you to sell yourself short that way. Well,
Speaker 1: it's funny. I would send the chapters as I would
Speaker 1: write them, and some of them were written and rewritten
Speaker 1: and re rewritten, like I'm sure you felt the same way.
Speaker 1: I would write a chapter five or six times before
Speaker 1: I found it right, and I would send it to Mark,
Speaker 1: who was mercifully living in Vancouver at the time. So
Speaker 1: he people are will say to him, you know, was
Speaker 1: it hard for you while she was writing this book?
Speaker 1: And he says no, she was great, And I said,
Speaker 1: he has no idea how insufferable I was, you know,
Speaker 1: for our forty five minute discussions a day, I would
Speaker 1: turn on all the charm and try to hide the
Speaker 1: hideousness of the self doubt and the and the me
Speaker 1: pacing around the bedroom and trying to like construct a sentence.
Speaker 1: But I would send the chapters to Mark first. He
Speaker 1: was sort of my pre editor, and he would call
Speaker 1: me back face time, me back, and he would say, wow,
Speaker 1: I thought this chapter was going to be about something else. Entirely.
Speaker 1: I didn't see that coming. And that's when I would
Speaker 1: know I got it right. You know. I waited for
Speaker 1: him to say, oh my gosh, the it's the funniest thing,
Speaker 1: or how did you remember that? How do you recall that?
Speaker 1: And I would say, you know, when I write in
Speaker 1: those journals at night, and you think that I'm just
Speaker 1: like making lists of things I have to do, it's
Speaker 1: that's what I'm doing. I'm actually writing down the things
Speaker 1: that I want to remember for And it was Andy
Speaker 1: Cohen who told me to do that many years ago,
Speaker 1: years and years ago. I remember Jean Chalotte. I think
Speaker 1: I might have mentioned this in my book. I can't
Speaker 1: even remember Jilly, what's in it? What's not that that?
Speaker 1: Jane Shallotte said you should talk into a tape recorder
Speaker 1: when I got my job on the Today Show. He said,
Speaker 1: every day talking to a tape recorder, just talk about
Speaker 1: like what the day was like, what an interview was like.
Speaker 1: I was like, Jane, that is such a good idea,
Speaker 1: And of course I never did it. And I'm not
Speaker 1: a journal er either, so it was but thank God
Speaker 1: for the Internet because I could retrieve so much. Thank
Speaker 1: god I'm a pack rat because I could look back
Speaker 1: on speeches and my calendars and all sorts of other
Speaker 1: things that reminded me. But Andy was a really good
Speaker 1: friend to have you do that, and I'm sure it
Speaker 1: was extremely helpful in writing the book. I wanted to
Speaker 1: ask you about Mark because obviously you guys have an
Speaker 1: incredible relationship UM, which is so nice, so nice to see,
Speaker 1: and I know you wrote about you know, we were
Speaker 1: not supposed to make it and people in show business,
Speaker 1: but I do think you guys are both um very
Speaker 1: much mired in your respective values of your families and UM.
Speaker 1: But I did laugh at when you first met him,
Speaker 1: and it was when you were on all my children,
Speaker 1: and he was coming in to audition for and you
Speaker 1: saw his head shot and basically he had you at
Speaker 1: not even Hello. There was the head she had me
Speaker 1: at Mark and Sulo's actor. And then you come out
Speaker 1: in curlers. I think you had zip medicine, had toothpaste
Speaker 1: at toothpaste because I tried every other remedy, and I
Speaker 1: had show curlers too. I had those giant velcrow rollers,
Speaker 1: you know, the ones that looked like coke. So I
Speaker 1: had those because you know, we always say like on
Speaker 1: a soap opera, the bigger the hair, closer to Emmy's. Yeah,
Speaker 1: clo you get. So I had these coke bottle rollers.
Speaker 1: And it didn't have any makeup on because I was like,
Speaker 1: for some reason, my scenes were at the end of
Speaker 1: the day and it's like it's not a first come,
Speaker 1: first serve. It's like, whoever is up first, you're in
Speaker 1: makeup first. So no makeup on. It is giant pimple
Speaker 1: because why wouldn't I and I had covered it with
Speaker 1: cold Gate toothpaste, but cold Gate on. We decided for
Speaker 1: some reason at the soap that cogate was the best
Speaker 1: for getting rid of zits. When all else fails. Um right,
Speaker 1: and so I walk in and he is there because
Speaker 1: he was brand new to show business. He had never
Speaker 1: auditioned for anything, and here he was screen testing for
Speaker 1: a soap opera and he had no idea what a
Speaker 1: screen test was, the same as me. When I screen tested,
Speaker 1: I thought it was a written exam. And I'm not kidding,
Speaker 1: and you you know how you yes? I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: no longer at that place in my life where when
Speaker 1: now I'm brave enough to say no, I'm sorry. I
Speaker 1: don't know who or what you're talking. And I also
Speaker 1: love that you've discovered how to say no that doesn't
Speaker 1: work for me, that which I can't really do. But
Speaker 1: we'll talk about that in a minute. I send you
Speaker 1: my therapist and she'll make you practice in front of
Speaker 1: a mirror. You know, you can't even say no, I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: That doesn't work for me. You know, take that I'm
Speaker 1: sorry out, But you tried to. I can't do that. No. No,
Speaker 1: I learned how to do it, but it took. And
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding. No, that doesn't work for me. That
Speaker 1: doesn't it's but it's not it's not cold or mean.
Speaker 1: It's something that people say to us all the time. Um,
Speaker 1: they're usually men. And then there's and so you so
Speaker 1: we Uh. I think it's not just the nature of
Speaker 1: our business because as I've been on a book tour,
Speaker 1: so I'm meeting I'm meeting people from all sorts of
Speaker 1: industries that I had really dialed into that particular chapter. Um,
Speaker 1: because they are utilizing my no, that doesn't work for me.
Speaker 1: And guess what, you know, this is free advice. It's
Speaker 1: not a self help book, but this is free advice.
Speaker 1: I spent thousands of dollars on therapy to learn to
Speaker 1: say no that doesn't work for me. But again, it
Speaker 1: was hard for me. I had to practice and practice.
Speaker 1: I kept saying no, I'm so sorry, and she would
Speaker 1: maybe ask me next year, asked me, yes, ask me
Speaker 1: in a year, because they will, they'll ask you in
Speaker 1: a year. They market down. Even my husband was like,
Speaker 1: don't say that, because they're going to come back and
Speaker 1: you have to say no again exactly. And so I
Speaker 1: was in this place where I was saying yes, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: or oh my gosh, I'm so sorry that doesn't work
Speaker 1: because I have seven other conflicts. But you know, if
Speaker 1: there's some other day, oh yes, we'll work around your schedule.
Speaker 1: You tell us what day you don't have EIGHTI seven
Speaker 1: other things. So when you say no, that doesn't work
Speaker 1: for me, it sort of stops any and all advancement
Speaker 1: of any other conversation. And it works like a charm
Speaker 1: every single It works a hundred percent of the time.
Speaker 1: A hundred percent of the time. All Right, I'm going
Speaker 1: to try it. Alright, No, that doesn't work for me.
Speaker 1: You're going to have to practice it in the mirror.
Speaker 1: I can see you already vacillating. You're formulating that. I'm
Speaker 1: so sosign a pleaser. I understand, and I too, am
Speaker 1: a reformed pleaser. It's like there should be a self helpleaser.
Speaker 1: Is anymous pleaser is anonymous? P My name is Katie,
Speaker 1: and I'm a pleaser. Katie, Katie. By getting back to
Speaker 1: Mark and the cold gate on your face, did you
Speaker 1: really do a tap dance when you first saw him?
Speaker 1: I mean I did tap dance. You kind of were like, know,
Speaker 1: I mean it was that was what I was doing.
Speaker 1: It was like, you know, I was like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: I really said to him. I vomited words at him.
Speaker 1: He was spell bound a good way and not in
Speaker 1: a good way. He was spell bound, and and he
Speaker 1: doesn't recall what I looked like at all. He always
Speaker 1: goes back to I was just trying to get a job,
Speaker 1: and I was warned that actors were strange, and so
Speaker 1: you just seem like a strange actor. And I was like,
Speaker 1: did I you know? But I was so um, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I wanted to engage him in some way
Speaker 1: and let him know that, you know, I look at
Speaker 1: how low maintenance I am with I'm the girl with
Speaker 1: the cold gate on her face and the Cooke bottle
Speaker 1: rollers in her hair. Totally uh, totally comfortable with my
Speaker 1: future husband seeing me this way. Isn't that funny? But
Speaker 1: it's wonderful that you know that you guys did connect
Speaker 1: that he wasn't like security. Yeah exactly. I mean, first
Speaker 1: of all, he should have filed a restraining order. But
Speaker 1: second of all, it was this weird thing where I
Speaker 1: knew again I'm not a believer in love at first sight.
Speaker 1: I've never been a hopeless romantic. I'm like, very pragmatic.
Speaker 1: I'm a practical lady, you know. Uh, And I've never
Speaker 1: It's so funny. I never decorated a dressing room ever
Speaker 1: in my life until like my fifteenth year at Live.
Speaker 1: My fifteenth year at Live, I decorated my dressing room
Speaker 1: because I was like, I think they're gonna think They're
Speaker 1: probably just going to carry me out, or maybe TV
Speaker 1: will end. I don't know. But I was so practical.
Speaker 1: I never wanted to keep things around that I would
Speaker 1: have to pack into a box and leave, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean. It felt like a waste of time.
Speaker 1: So people would always walk into my dressing room and say,
Speaker 1: is your dressing room being redecorated? And I'd say, no,
Speaker 1: this is my dressing room. Why why do you ask?
Speaker 1: It's so barren and terrifying looking. And I said, well,
Speaker 1: you never know. Every day could be your last day. Um.
Speaker 1: So to be a person that suddenly found themselves dreaming
Speaker 1: that I was married to this person, this complete stranger,
Speaker 1: and that we were flying to Rome together on an
Speaker 1: airplane with a baby made no sense. And then I
Speaker 1: the next day at the screen test, as I talked
Speaker 1: about in the book, I vomited that out at him.
Speaker 1: I said, I had a dream, you know, I had
Speaker 1: a dream, dream baby, okay? Um? And so I told
Speaker 1: him about this dream and he was so non threatened
Speaker 1: and grown up about the whole thing, and he sort
Speaker 1: of just and you know, the room fell into a hush.
Speaker 1: There were ten other guys. They're also auditioning for the
Speaker 1: role of Matteo, who seemed spellbound by this conversation. He
Speaker 1: was like not even halfway paying attention. He was writing down,
Speaker 1: blocking and taking notes. And I said, remember me from yesterday.
Speaker 1: So glad it turned out the way, But it shouldn't have.
Speaker 1: I mean, it should file the restraining order. I should
Speaker 1: probably should have been fired. I mean I broke every
Speaker 1: role that well, I guess they didn't exist yet. It
Speaker 1: was the free willing nineties. But but wasn't the US.
Speaker 1: It wasn't the rules. There were no rules. And so
Speaker 1: um I somehow became his friend. We became friends, and
Speaker 1: we really started liking each other and respecting each other.
Speaker 1: And we had, um we had read the same books,
Speaker 1: we found the same um. You know, we were both
Speaker 1: at the time following the Rwandan genocide and nobody was
Speaker 1: talking about it except us, so we would talk about
Speaker 1: it to each other and um, you know, and we
Speaker 1: had a lot of commonalities even though we grew up
Speaker 1: very different our parents. He was born in Spain, was
Speaker 1: born Florida. Well, he was born in Spain and then
Speaker 1: lived in Italy until he was seven. His father was
Speaker 1: in special operations for the military and so, and then
Speaker 1: they moved to Lebanon, Illinois, and then they he went
Speaker 1: to high school in Florida. UM, so he moved around
Speaker 1: quite a bit. And then I was born and raised
Speaker 1: in the same house my mother was raised in. My
Speaker 1: grandfather built the house himself. And but the South Jerseys,
Speaker 1: the South Jersey. I was from the South of Jersey.
Speaker 1: It was really fun to read that with the accent
Speaker 1: and the mayor of East Town and and what what
Speaker 1: you use some words that the way people like the
Speaker 1: Philadelphia Eggles you know, you're going the Eggles game and
Speaker 1: some other things. You know my name, you know, back
Speaker 1: in high school they would have called me Kelly Rippet,
Speaker 1: you know the right. Yes, it's like, oh, sound like
Speaker 1: e used Yeah. Um ours are like yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: it's like a heart. You do some very funny phonetically.
Speaker 1: Phonetically it's almost impossible to understand. Yeah, you said, you
Speaker 1: say begel, you say right in Like imagine taking a
Speaker 1: spelling test when you're in third grade. Beans, beans, yeah,
Speaker 1: they fan. Yeah, you have a Ham fan Like I
Speaker 1: got a hard time doing it. Now. I love it though,
Speaker 1: because you're so proud of being from South Jersey. I
Speaker 1: just love it. But now I'm hearing, you know, people
Speaker 1: who have read this book. I hear from the North
Speaker 1: Jersey ors all the time. You know, we're not Fonsy
Speaker 1: the way you think we are. And I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: it sounds like a little self defensive to me. Don't
Speaker 1: hate our blueberries. After the break, Kelly and I chat
Speaker 1: about finding our footing in the media boys club. There's
Speaker 1: so much we could talk about, Kelly. But I do
Speaker 1: want to ask you, obviously about just because I think
Speaker 1: we have a lot in common being a woman, uh
Speaker 1: fulfilling kind of the role of an archetype, being put
Speaker 1: in a box and and sort of not being able
Speaker 1: to expand outside the borders of that box. And but
Speaker 1: but I want to ask you about your Live experience
Speaker 1: because it was so sorre to me. Not although not really,
Speaker 1: but you know, it sounds like the whole thing was fraught.
Speaker 1: I would say that that fraught at least the beginning
Speaker 1: of your career at Live, because you were sort of
Speaker 1: wide but sort of not, and it wasn't like it
Speaker 1: was just this bizarre wooing process that wasn't really wooing,
Speaker 1: but just kind of like, we've got to fill this
Speaker 1: role and she's there, and it was a very uh
Speaker 1: it was. It must have been a very strange experience.
Speaker 1: And I think you captured really well in the book. Yeah,
Speaker 1: thank you. Kind of what a mind funck. Excuse me,
Speaker 1: it was right, Yeah, it was very strange because, um,
Speaker 1: you know, I did not know. And again, much like
Speaker 1: writing a book, ignorance sometimes really is bliss. I was
Speaker 1: sort of baffled. I did not understand that there were
Speaker 1: these two separate organizations, the network and the local affiliate
Speaker 1: station W eight BC. Okay, they were partners in this show,
Speaker 1: but they were enormously The heads of both organizations were
Speaker 1: enormously distrustful of one another, less so on the ABC
Speaker 1: network side and more so on the w a B
Speaker 1: because the w ABC probably had a bit of an
Speaker 1: inferiority complex. Well, I think they also felt like, well,
Speaker 1: we were broadcasting this show locally. Now here they come
Speaker 1: and they want to make it a national show, and
Speaker 1: now they're going to try to control us, or who
Speaker 1: do they think they are? Or whatever. This is me
Speaker 1: thinking aloud. You know, I'm not representing this in the book.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying I'm thinking aloud as to what the
Speaker 1: what was the basis of this strange dynamic, strange dynamic
Speaker 1: that I could not possibly understand because I was living
Speaker 1: under this assumption that we were all on the same channel,
Speaker 1: so we were all friends and Synergy and Disney and
Speaker 1: La La La, and I did not realize that because
Speaker 1: I was so wanted by the network, that I might
Speaker 1: not be wanted to buy the W E B W
Speaker 1: a BC faction right. And I didn't realize that until
Speaker 1: much farther along. You know, Lauren R, my producer for
Speaker 1: the podcast, was saying that, you know, Kathy Lee didn't
Speaker 1: have that issue because she and Regious started together, but
Speaker 1: then he was established. He probably felt or maybe that
Speaker 1: contingent felt they were being bigfooted or forced to do
Speaker 1: something by the network and not necessarily, Um, we're on
Speaker 1: board with it, or you know, looking back on it,
Speaker 1: what do you think you could have done to smooth
Speaker 1: things over a little bit? Do you think, because I
Speaker 1: think it's not that dissimilar from my experience at CBS
Speaker 1: where Les Moonves, the head of Entertainment wooed me, but
Speaker 1: I never got the complete buy in by the news division.
Speaker 1: And I think that if I had politically, and I'm
Speaker 1: not very political, unfortunately, if I had politically like gone
Speaker 1: to different people within the news division and really kind
Speaker 1: of won them over, or at least had the knowledge
Speaker 1: that they didn't want me there or they didn't want
Speaker 1: me there, it would have been maybe slightly different. Do
Speaker 1: you look think back on I. I mean, it's so
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's it's so interesting you say that.
Speaker 1: And that's why I'm very careful to point out that
Speaker 1: certainly wasn't Regis his fault. You know, I never blame
Speaker 1: him in this book. I don't blame him at all
Speaker 1: because he was a signed, a co host, and this
Speaker 1: is a man that had earned his place in show
Speaker 1: business and he had, you know, kept that train on
Speaker 1: the track. So do you think if you had said,
Speaker 1: I want to make sure Regis is okay with this,
Speaker 1: that it might have made the transition easier. I think
Speaker 1: that I was so unaware that he wasn't that he wasn't.
Speaker 1: I never occurred to me that he would not have
Speaker 1: the stamp of approval. You know what, I mean when
Speaker 1: even when they said to me, it's not his choice
Speaker 1: to make, it's our choice, and I was like, but
Speaker 1: it should be his choice, and they said, well, we're
Speaker 1: not going to force a host upon any other host,
Speaker 1: you know, and then you realize, like that's totally untrue,
Speaker 1: like that's exactly what happened, and and and it makes
Speaker 1: me feel sad for for him. But I think eventually,
Speaker 1: eventually we did like have a smooth like we smoothed
Speaker 1: it out, like we worked. Because I'm a very honest
Speaker 1: and earnest person, and like you, I am not political.
Speaker 1: So it never occurred to me that I had to um,
Speaker 1: I didn't even understand the dynamics, Like who would I
Speaker 1: have spoken to? I thought I was speaking to the
Speaker 1: people I needed to speak to. And I thought that
Speaker 1: just me being there and being very deferential, and me
Speaker 1: waiting my turn and taking my place and taking my
Speaker 1: lums and accepting responsibilities for things that had nothing to
Speaker 1: do with me, and playing that game. I thought that
Speaker 1: I was doing all of that. I thought I was
Speaker 1: doing all of the right things. You know, this is
Speaker 1: where I think agents sometimes fall down on the job.
Speaker 1: You know, they're so concerned with salaries, but they don't
Speaker 1: actually make sure that the environment that they're putting clients
Speaker 1: in is the right one. And I think the best
Speaker 1: agents would really, you know, even those who call themselves managers,
Speaker 1: would really take it upon themselves to help guide someone
Speaker 1: and help smooth other of these rough edges and have
Speaker 1: the foresight to understand that this dynamic might not be
Speaker 1: helpful for their clients. Right. And it seemed to be
Speaker 1: exactly the previous statement was, it's more about the money
Speaker 1: and the salary and their coin operators, and it was
Speaker 1: more about UM not necessarily being concerned with what was
Speaker 1: best for me or for Regius um, or it was
Speaker 1: being concerned with the bottom line and UM not. You know,
Speaker 1: even even the times I said, you know, this is
Speaker 1: becoming this seems to be very challenging, and I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm getting abused in the at least in the
Speaker 1: tabloid press, I was very abused and uh, and there
Speaker 1: was sort of this hands up, well, there's nothing we
Speaker 1: can do about it. What do you want us to
Speaker 1: do about it? You know? I know you say that
Speaker 1: you you smooth things over, but it sounds like like
Speaker 1: there were issues all along, and that even when we
Speaker 1: just left the show, there was some kind of tension
Speaker 1: or resentment, not that I was aware of, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: it was it was like literally after the fact, and
Speaker 1: like ten years after the foot but saying, like to
Speaker 1: Larry King, misrepresenting kind of you. And you know, it
Speaker 1: seems like he sort of from my impressions from the book,
Speaker 1: when when you wanted to have a closer relationship, he
Speaker 1: was a little talk to the hand ish it. He
Speaker 1: believed and and because he had done the show for
Speaker 1: so long that if you are working together, that is
Speaker 1: where it begins and ends, and then you have your
Speaker 1: life out. Any company think that was the case with
Speaker 1: Kathy Lee too. I don't know. I don't know the
Speaker 1: nature of their relationship. Again, I think power dynamics are
Speaker 1: very different, and when you're two equals, that's a very
Speaker 1: different thing than what I was perceived as coming in
Speaker 1: as a secondary host. So I can't you know, It's
Speaker 1: like I can't know that. I don't know what it
Speaker 1: was like. I just know that these were the rules
Speaker 1: that were established, like the conversations at had to be
Speaker 1: saved for the air and only for the air, you know,
Speaker 1: And was he worried that if you had more of
Speaker 1: a social relationship, it might change the dynamic. I mean
Speaker 1: I remember thinking that with Matt and Brian, I didn't
Speaker 1: want to hang out with them, not that they wanted
Speaker 1: to hang out with me. I didn't really want to
Speaker 1: hang out with them because I thought, what if I
Speaker 1: get mad, or what if someone says something, or what
Speaker 1: if somebody gets drunk or It's like, I don't I
Speaker 1: don't want that to interfere with our professional relationships. Well
Speaker 1: that's what I said. I was like, only in this
Speaker 1: day and age is now like we had a very
Speaker 1: professional relationship, and now that has looked with like some
Speaker 1: sense of scorn. And I said, there was a time
Speaker 1: where that was to be revered professionalism in the workplace.
Speaker 1: You know. Um, but you know, it's one of those
Speaker 1: things that I feel like whatever notes we hit, we
Speaker 1: hit correctly. And those the reason I transcripted those parts
Speaker 1: of the book is because I wanted it to be accurate.
Speaker 1: My opinion or my thought process as to that should
Speaker 1: not like should not interfere as as to the reality
Speaker 1: of what was said. It's like, these are the facts.
Speaker 1: We saw each other. I saw him, he was on
Speaker 1: our show, But then this interview happened where he said
Speaker 1: he hadn't and was never invited, never called, and and
Speaker 1: so I thought, because I'm an idiot, I thought, well,
Speaker 1: it's also easily irrefuted, irrefutable, and these the press will
Speaker 1: do its job and say, actually, he was on the
Speaker 1: show a few months ago, Actually he's been. And it
Speaker 1: was like radio silence. That story just spread like wildfire,
Speaker 1: and I was baffled. I couldn't believe of it, and
Speaker 1: I went I remember going into work the next day
Speaker 1: and my producers all looked stricken, you know, kind of
Speaker 1: they felt bad for me. I think they felt bad
Speaker 1: for me, like I that it was being so misrepresented.
Speaker 1: It was being misrepresented. Why do you think, why do
Speaker 1: you think we just did that? I don't know. Ye
Speaker 1: in the book, I don't know, and I still don't know.
Speaker 1: And you wanted to basically set the record straight. I'm
Speaker 1: not an abandon er. I don't abandon People's not my thing.
Speaker 1: And and it's interesting because the reaction, I'm sure, the
Speaker 1: tabloid reaction to this book, um, which I was sort
Speaker 1: of warning you of. I think when I came on
Speaker 1: the show, where things are taken out of context, twisted
Speaker 1: or obviously conflicts cells right. But the only reaction to
Speaker 1: the book was that that my husband made me pass
Speaker 1: out while we were having sex. I mean that was
Speaker 1: like that. That was the headline of the book. That's
Speaker 1: a good story, which you're going to have to get
Speaker 1: the book. Really is Mark dress Kelly and a really
Speaker 1: bad outfit when she passed out to the hospital. But
Speaker 1: that was the that was the big takeaway. And I
Speaker 1: kept saying, what about the Regis stuff? Has that gotten
Speaker 1: some some negative press? No? Just yeah, But that was
Speaker 1: the only press that it got because I think people
Speaker 1: read it and understood it and it was and went,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, it all makes sense now. Like so
Speaker 1: you feel like you achieve what you set out to
Speaker 1: in terms of not not not the whole book. I'm
Speaker 1: just talking about that sort of misunderstanding and the fact
Speaker 1: that you wanted to correct the record, which because I
Speaker 1: think we're entitled to correct the record, especially if it's misrepresented.
Speaker 1: So that's why I, like I said, I don't represent
Speaker 1: my opinion. I represent everything in transcripts because I think
Speaker 1: it's more to have a transcript on record. And you know,
Speaker 1: and again this is like one chapter. It's like it's
Speaker 1: like I like people to focus on the book and
Speaker 1: its totality, but I would be remiss if I didn't
Speaker 1: talk about my transition into that show, because it's such
Speaker 1: a huge part of my life. Of course, while I'm
Speaker 1: with your sister, I mean, I feel this the same
Speaker 1: way about what I wrote about my book and various experiences.
Speaker 1: It's I feel like not it's not a burn book.
Speaker 1: I disparage anyone, I leave the reader. And again, people
Speaker 1: who have read the book have a very different you know.
Speaker 1: They It's the reason there were no headlines about that
Speaker 1: chapter is because it's not headline generating, you know, and
Speaker 1: people who have read it have this kind of understanding
Speaker 1: about what it's like to work in a place that
Speaker 1: it's not like organ an it where it's not two
Speaker 1: people getting to know each other. It's like fast. It
Speaker 1: happens fast. Everything happens fast, right, And then to have
Speaker 1: something misrepresented about you in the press, what do you do?
Speaker 1: Do you just hope it goes away or do you
Speaker 1: set the record straight in real time? That's the whole
Speaker 1: point of the story, you know, is that? But was
Speaker 1: it frustrating? Because I do think there were some headlines
Speaker 1: and I think that's what Kathie Lee was responding to
Speaker 1: Um that that that did misrepresent what you were saying
Speaker 1: in the book. Now I know there there really weren't.
Speaker 1: I mean that the headlines were not disparaging, they were
Speaker 1: not misrepresentative. That's what I was so surprised by the
Speaker 1: headlines generated was that reaction to not headlines. So I
Speaker 1: was sort of fascinated by, oh my gosh, these are
Speaker 1: headlines that are now based on a non reader of
Speaker 1: the book, and before that there were no headlines. And
Speaker 1: so it really did like, ultimately, I think, you know this,
Speaker 1: like book sales are. It's really a very word of mouth.
Speaker 1: And I'm not I'm not somebody that believes it all
Speaker 1: pr is good press is good press. I don't believe that.
Speaker 1: But when it comes to selling a book, it is
Speaker 1: apparently it is, as you know, as you are now aware.
Speaker 1: And so it's one of those things where I went,
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, it's so funny, Like I felt like
Speaker 1: there there was a moment where I couldn't get my
Speaker 1: book mentioned in in Vanity Fair in you know, glamour
Speaker 1: in the New York Times, and then suddenly I can,
Speaker 1: and it's like that shocking weird I go and here
Speaker 1: I am again in this conundrum. Do I set the
Speaker 1: record straight or do I just say thank you? And
Speaker 1: I chose to say thank you. One of the things
Speaker 1: that you know, you write about and is the fact
Speaker 1: that you didn't have an office, You didn't have a desk,
Speaker 1: you had no place to put your computer, and um,
Speaker 1: I didn't have a computer. You didn't have a confiding
Speaker 1: that one. You know, but it took a while for
Speaker 1: you to feel like you were part. Yeah, it sounds
Speaker 1: like sort of a high school click that you couldn't penetrate.
Speaker 1: And it kind of made me mad at at at
Speaker 1: Michael Gellman, you know it did. It made me mad
Speaker 1: and I was like, Okay, he's the executive producer of
Speaker 1: the show. He should be he should be supporting Kelly,
Speaker 1: he should be creating a culture where she's welcomed. And
Speaker 1: it made me mad. You know, I don't think it's
Speaker 1: his fault. I really don't. I don't put any responsibility
Speaker 1: on him. I think it was a way that's not true. No,
Speaker 1: I I understand, and a lot of people think like
Speaker 1: they think they put it down to one person, like
Speaker 1: well he's the boss. There there are so many people
Speaker 1: that were over his head and over all of our
Speaker 1: heads that were worked above us. And you know, I
Speaker 1: had and still have a great working relationship with him.
Speaker 1: And he has to walk a very fine line, a
Speaker 1: tight rope. That's a tight rope walk not showing favorites,
Speaker 1: not picking favorites, not and like say, and keeping your
Speaker 1: own job in the process. It's hard. That's hard work.
Speaker 1: And anytime something seems easy, it's hard, you know. And
Speaker 1: so he's been the executive producer of that show for
Speaker 1: all eight hundred and seventy two seasons or whatever, you know.
Speaker 1: And it's like, I don't blame him because I think
Speaker 1: he was doing the best he could in a very
Speaker 1: in a very delicate situation. It was also a different time,
Speaker 1: you know. One of the things that people, I think
Speaker 1: sometimes don't understand. They read things that happened in the
Speaker 1: past through a lens of the present exactly. And that
Speaker 1: was also very profound, that was very You cannot do
Speaker 1: this to the lens of the pressent. You should do
Speaker 1: this for a living. You're very good. But no, you're right.
Speaker 1: But that's why in the book I keep reminding everyone,
Speaker 1: if like women were created kind of like sex class citizens,
Speaker 1: and that's the way it was. And I write about
Speaker 1: it in the context of the time, because it's important
Speaker 1: for people to gather the context of the time. These
Speaker 1: were not unheard of things. This was not an ONI
Speaker 1: was a very male dominated industry and U you know,
Speaker 1: and full of big egoes and and so it was complicated. So, um,
Speaker 1: what are you thinking about your future? Are you loving
Speaker 1: where you are? Still? You know, as somebody who did
Speaker 1: a morning show for fifteen years and and really appreciated
Speaker 1: every day. But it started to feel like groundhog Day
Speaker 1: at some point, where like how many segments it's about?
Speaker 1: You know, what are the best genes for your body?
Speaker 1: I could I do? I also think about, you know,
Speaker 1: the young blood fresh people coming in. I think about
Speaker 1: it all the time. I'm very cognizant of that, you know,
Speaker 1: and I discussed it a lot, you know, every time
Speaker 1: we have somebody on the show that's young and funny
Speaker 1: and effervescent or even you know, by young, I mean
Speaker 1: just younger than me, you know, um, effervescent, interesting. I
Speaker 1: always I always turned a gouman and I'll say, you know,
Speaker 1: you should you should look at her first. You should
Speaker 1: look at her for you know, co host. Like when
Speaker 1: I go on vacation ever sit in a chair with
Speaker 1: Ryan um and and same with guys. I look at
Speaker 1: guys and I'm like, you know, you should take a
Speaker 1: look at this guy. Because I'm very cognizant. I believe
Speaker 1: that as a franchise show. I don't think I'm the
Speaker 1: host of the show. I don't think the shows a
Speaker 1: success because of me. I don't think it's a success
Speaker 1: because of any one person. It is a group effort
Speaker 1: and come on, your important people like continuity, but they
Speaker 1: also enjoy that shot in the arm of the you know,
Speaker 1: the breath of fresh air. Remember when you were the
Speaker 1: breath of fresh air. I remember when I was the
Speaker 1: breath of fresh air. You know what I mean? I
Speaker 1: remember that, you know? Uh? And so you don't want
Speaker 1: to be like the the person you don't want hot breath? Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know what breath garlet stuff that stayed around too long.
Speaker 1: But when you think about it, do you think like
Speaker 1: five years, two years, or do you think of do
Speaker 1: you think like that? You know? I mean I think
Speaker 1: if I thought like that, I would really you know,
Speaker 1: if I thought like in terms of years, it would
Speaker 1: be really too terrifying. I still would not have gotten
Speaker 1: past three years. You know, if they said three years
Speaker 1: from now, I'd be like three years. It's more of
Speaker 1: a I think you know, and you know you know,
Speaker 1: and and and when they know, they know, you know,
Speaker 1: and I think it's got to be that group discussion
Speaker 1: and hopefully you know before they know. Well, I mean,
Speaker 1: I think I actually think I do know. I'm not
Speaker 1: willing to actually discuss it if you generate all sorts
Speaker 1: of panic stricken headlines, but um, you know, I have
Speaker 1: a very good idea it is. You know, it is
Speaker 1: definitely like a finite amount of time. I'm not I'm
Speaker 1: not you know, working there. You're not going to be
Speaker 1: walking No, No, I'm not. It's it's not a forever job,
Speaker 1: and nor should it be. You know, everybody should get
Speaker 1: to I mean, I wish everybody could experience it and
Speaker 1: they might have a better uh comprehension of how difficult
Speaker 1: it can be. Sometimes is um, but it's mostly a
Speaker 1: high honor to be welcomed into people's homes, you know.
Speaker 1: Kelly Ripper's book is called Live Wire Long Winded Short Stories,
Speaker 1: and it's out now. Next Question with Katie Kurik is
Speaker 1: a production of I Heart Media and Katie Curic Media.
Speaker 1: The executive producers Army, Katie Curic, and Courtney Litz. The
Speaker 1: supervising producer is Lauren Hansen. Associate producers Derek Clements and
Speaker 1: Adriana Fasio. The show is edited and mixed by Derrick Clements.
Speaker 1: For more information about today's episode, or to sign up
Speaker 1: for my morning newsletter, Wake Up Paul, go to Katie
Speaker 1: Currek dot com. You can also find me at Katie
Speaker 1: Curic on Instagram and all my social media channels. For
Speaker 1: more podcasts from I Heart Radio, visit the I Heart
Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your
Speaker 1: favorite shows,