1 00:00:04,795 --> 00:00:21,835 Speaker 1: Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. The 2 00:00:21,915 --> 00:00:25,675 Speaker 1: audition by Robert Herr to get his own amateur neurology 3 00:00:25,755 --> 00:00:29,875 Speaker 1: show on Info Wars right after Alex Jones, an audition 4 00:00:29,915 --> 00:00:33,475 Speaker 1: which mister Herr laughingly titled Report of the Special Council 5 00:00:33,555 --> 00:00:38,355 Speaker 1: on the Investigation into the Biden Documents. That report is 6 00:00:38,395 --> 00:00:41,755 Speaker 1: no longer his. It belongs to the Department of Justice 7 00:00:41,795 --> 00:00:44,675 Speaker 1: and not to him. And so the CNN report last 8 00:00:44,755 --> 00:00:48,475 Speaker 1: night that her is in negotiations to testify to the 9 00:00:48,515 --> 00:00:51,835 Speaker 1: House Judiciary Committee later this month and to provide the 10 00:00:51,875 --> 00:00:54,715 Speaker 1: transcript of his interview with the President to the House 11 00:00:54,835 --> 00:00:58,795 Speaker 1: Oversight Committee should be greeted by Attorney General Garland immediately 12 00:00:58,995 --> 00:01:03,875 Speaker 1: with a one word response no. And if Garland indicates 13 00:01:03,915 --> 00:01:06,475 Speaker 1: the slightest willing to cooperate in any way with those 14 00:01:06,475 --> 00:01:08,795 Speaker 1: House committees, the President should fire him on the spot 15 00:01:08,875 --> 00:01:11,155 Speaker 1: and replace him with an Attorney General who will abide 16 00:01:11,195 --> 00:01:18,275 Speaker 1: by and apply the law. This scumbag her has already 17 00:01:18,275 --> 00:01:23,595 Speaker 1: manipulated this gullible fool Garland into designing, building, and painting 18 00:01:23,635 --> 00:01:28,355 Speaker 1: a platform from which her could launch a brazen, immoral, 19 00:01:28,395 --> 00:01:34,755 Speaker 1: and most importantly amazingly uninformed political hatchet job. If Garland 20 00:01:34,755 --> 00:01:36,795 Speaker 1: wants to be productive during what is by now with 21 00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:40,875 Speaker 1: certainty his lane duck stewardship at the Justice Department, he 22 00:01:40,915 --> 00:01:43,915 Speaker 1: should formerly warn mister her that his work remains under 23 00:01:43,955 --> 00:01:48,515 Speaker 1: the DOJ and that, having wildly violated departmental guidelines, he 24 00:01:48,635 --> 00:01:52,955 Speaker 1: may not discuss it again in this lifetime on fear 25 00:01:52,955 --> 00:01:57,235 Speaker 1: of being prosecuted for doing so. Garland should also encourage 26 00:01:57,235 --> 00:02:00,395 Speaker 1: a body of former special prosecutors and prosecutors to get 27 00:02:00,515 --> 00:02:06,355 Speaker 1: Robert Hurd disbarred. While we are at this the saga 28 00:02:06,435 --> 00:02:11,875 Speaker 1: of but her memory, h you are whoever is running 29 00:02:11,995 --> 00:02:16,475 Speaker 1: NBC Universal Television these days before his personal scandal gets 30 00:02:16,555 --> 00:02:21,115 Speaker 1: him fired, needs to fire NBC News chairman, says our Conde. 31 00:02:21,475 --> 00:02:24,995 Speaker 1: Needs to fire NBC News President Editorial Supervising Meet the 32 00:02:24,995 --> 00:02:29,155 Speaker 1: Press Rebecca Blumenstein. Needs to fire NBC News Senior Vice 33 00:02:29,195 --> 00:02:32,875 Speaker 1: president Politics Carrie but Off Brown, needs to fire Meet 34 00:02:32,915 --> 00:02:35,995 Speaker 1: the Press executive producer David Gellis, and needs to fire 35 00:02:36,035 --> 00:02:41,355 Speaker 1: Meet the Press host or stooge or greeter Kristen Welker 36 00:02:41,755 --> 00:02:48,755 Speaker 1: for utter journalistic malpractice. Even Robert Hurr wrote about Biden 37 00:02:49,115 --> 00:02:53,275 Speaker 1: and his ghostwriter quote. We conclude that the evidence does 38 00:02:53,315 --> 00:02:58,115 Speaker 1: not establish that mister Biden willfully disclosed national defense information. 39 00:02:58,555 --> 00:03:01,635 Speaker 1: The evidence falls short of proving that mister Biden did 40 00:03:01,675 --> 00:03:06,155 Speaker 1: so willfully. The evidence does not show et cetera, et cetera, 41 00:03:06,435 --> 00:03:10,595 Speaker 1: et cetera. Kristin Welker somehow turned that into the report 42 00:03:10,675 --> 00:03:15,155 Speaker 1: says the president quote wilfully retained and disclosed classified materials, 43 00:03:15,435 --> 00:03:20,395 Speaker 1: which he shared with a ghostwriter. NBC, which used to 44 00:03:20,435 --> 00:03:24,275 Speaker 1: have a news division, also took the phrase wilfully retained 45 00:03:24,315 --> 00:03:27,675 Speaker 1: and disclosed classified materials and made it into a full 46 00:03:27,715 --> 00:03:32,115 Speaker 1: screen graphic placed behind Kristin Welker as she dramatically read 47 00:03:32,155 --> 00:03:36,875 Speaker 1: her lie. The part about evidence does not establish that 48 00:03:37,035 --> 00:03:40,275 Speaker 1: mister Biden did that or anything like it. That has 49 00:03:40,355 --> 00:03:44,475 Speaker 1: been somehow left out of the graphic and replaced by 50 00:03:45,115 --> 00:03:49,115 Speaker 1: an ellipsis three little dots. It's not a big difference. 51 00:03:49,355 --> 00:03:53,155 Speaker 1: It's just you being found not guilty by a jury 52 00:03:53,835 --> 00:03:56,755 Speaker 1: and NBC and meet the press and remarkably incompetent Miss 53 00:03:56,835 --> 00:03:59,915 Speaker 1: Welker deciding to trim that quote a little bit so 54 00:03:59,955 --> 00:04:06,635 Speaker 1: that quote not guilty becomes quote dot dot dot guilty fire, 55 00:04:06,715 --> 00:04:11,195 Speaker 1: Conde fire, Blumenstein, brown fire, Galis Firewhelker. Whether they are 56 00:04:11,235 --> 00:04:15,355 Speaker 1: simply negligent idiots, or if they actually falsified the news 57 00:04:15,435 --> 00:04:19,595 Speaker 1: for their own purposes, that distinction no longer matters. The 58 00:04:19,635 --> 00:04:24,155 Speaker 1: premise of news even these days is that when the 59 00:04:24,275 --> 00:04:29,915 Speaker 1: verdict is not guilty and you report guilty, you are 60 00:04:30,035 --> 00:04:36,315 Speaker 1: fired and you never work in news again. When I 61 00:04:36,515 --> 00:04:40,395 Speaker 1: broke in at United Press International, then the second largest 62 00:04:40,435 --> 00:04:43,435 Speaker 1: news organization in the world, I once said on a 63 00:04:43,475 --> 00:04:46,995 Speaker 1: sportscast that the University of Southern California football team had 64 00:04:47,035 --> 00:04:53,395 Speaker 1: beaten USC. In fact, it had beaten UCLA. The University 65 00:04:53,435 --> 00:04:58,755 Speaker 1: of Southern California football team was USC. My boss pleasantly 66 00:04:58,835 --> 00:05:02,155 Speaker 1: but firmly advised me that if I made a mistake 67 00:05:02,235 --> 00:05:04,475 Speaker 1: like that again, I would be suspended, and if I 68 00:05:04,515 --> 00:05:07,115 Speaker 1: did twice, they would have to fire me. I did 69 00:05:07,155 --> 00:05:09,715 Speaker 1: not make that mistake again, and to my knowledge, I 70 00:05:09,795 --> 00:05:12,555 Speaker 1: have never let any mistake I have made go uncorrected. 71 00:05:12,755 --> 00:05:16,075 Speaker 1: I'm now in year forty five of this. The next 72 00:05:16,075 --> 00:05:18,995 Speaker 1: time Kristen Welker gets it wrong between guilty and not 73 00:05:19,075 --> 00:05:22,155 Speaker 1: guilty about the President of the United States and corrects 74 00:05:22,235 --> 00:05:26,955 Speaker 1: her error, it will be the first. And while we 75 00:05:27,155 --> 00:05:31,715 Speaker 1: are at it, Disney Chairman Robert Eiger, who I also 76 00:05:31,875 --> 00:05:36,115 Speaker 1: know now forty five years must fire ABC News president 77 00:05:36,195 --> 00:05:39,955 Speaker 1: Kimberly Godwin and the executive producer of ABC's This Week, 78 00:05:40,035 --> 00:05:44,315 Speaker 1: Brooke Brower and its substitute host John Carl, who are 79 00:05:44,355 --> 00:05:48,595 Speaker 1: responsible for the same falsehood on that network. John Carl 80 00:05:48,675 --> 00:05:51,915 Speaker 1: stated on Sunday that the Special Council found that President 81 00:05:51,955 --> 00:05:56,955 Speaker 1: Biden will fully retain classified documents, but they declined to prosecute. 82 00:05:56,995 --> 00:06:00,915 Speaker 1: In fact, even the political operative mister her stated quite 83 00:06:01,035 --> 00:06:05,235 Speaker 1: clearly that while there was some evidence Biden retained documents, 84 00:06:05,555 --> 00:06:08,875 Speaker 1: the evidence they found was that he did not willfully 85 00:06:09,195 --> 00:06:15,315 Speaker 1: retain documents. Again, verdict not guilty, ABC and John Carl's 86 00:06:15,355 --> 00:06:22,955 Speaker 1: version of the verdict guilty. The Supreme Court and other 87 00:06:22,995 --> 00:06:25,995 Speaker 1: courts in this nation have collapsed under their own weight. 88 00:06:27,475 --> 00:06:31,755 Speaker 1: One political party is corrupt beyond redemption. The Justice Department 89 00:06:31,755 --> 00:06:34,355 Speaker 1: has withered with fear of doing what it is supposed 90 00:06:34,395 --> 00:06:38,715 Speaker 1: to do. Individual states might as well be sawed off 91 00:06:38,755 --> 00:06:42,635 Speaker 1: from the continent. The presidency has been permanently stained by 92 00:06:42,675 --> 00:06:46,515 Speaker 1: Trump and might not last the decade. There is not 93 00:06:46,715 --> 00:06:50,035 Speaker 1: much we civilians can do about any of that individually, 94 00:06:50,115 --> 00:06:56,435 Speaker 1: but refusing to consume programming by NBC until it fires Chairman, 95 00:06:56,555 --> 00:06:59,995 Speaker 1: Conde and Welker and the rest, and by ABC until 96 00:06:59,995 --> 00:07:02,675 Speaker 1: it fires President Godwin and Carl and the rest. That 97 00:07:02,795 --> 00:07:07,515 Speaker 1: is a simple matter of watching something else, more journalistic 98 00:07:08,075 --> 00:07:15,155 Speaker 1: and more honest, somewhere else on television, something like Bugs 99 00:07:15,195 --> 00:07:23,755 Speaker 1: Bunny cartoons, ABC News and NBC News. Misreporting the already 100 00:07:23,795 --> 00:07:26,795 Speaker 1: bastardized her report was part of the worst weekend for 101 00:07:26,835 --> 00:07:30,115 Speaker 1: the dying remnants of our scattershot news industry since Hillary 102 00:07:30,115 --> 00:07:34,955 Speaker 1: Clinton's emails. There's a lot of handwringing about newspapers laying 103 00:07:34,955 --> 00:07:38,315 Speaker 1: off reporters by the hundreds, and other news organizations going 104 00:07:38,355 --> 00:07:41,435 Speaker 1: out of business, and I am as far from unempathetic 105 00:07:41,475 --> 00:07:45,595 Speaker 1: about this as possible. United Press International went under, My 106 00:07:45,755 --> 00:07:51,275 Speaker 1: second employers went under. Current TV went under. One thing 107 00:07:51,355 --> 00:07:53,595 Speaker 1: left out of those nightmares is the part played by 108 00:07:53,595 --> 00:07:58,995 Speaker 1: the fact that often reporting, writing, editing, and especially editorial 109 00:07:59,075 --> 00:08:06,515 Speaker 1: decision making now sucks, as the way website popular information notes. 110 00:08:06,635 --> 00:08:09,555 Speaker 1: Between last Wednesday and last Saturday, just The New York 111 00:08:09,595 --> 00:08:16,075 Speaker 1: Times published thirty three to zero stories about the alleged 112 00:08:16,115 --> 00:08:19,275 Speaker 1: memory issues of President Biden, and not one of them 113 00:08:19,315 --> 00:08:22,235 Speaker 1: mentioned that the man who put them in that report 114 00:08:22,275 --> 00:08:26,235 Speaker 1: is barely a lawyer. Let alone a neurologist or a 115 00:08:26,435 --> 00:08:30,035 Speaker 1: memory loss scientist, or in any way, shape or form 116 00:08:30,115 --> 00:08:36,515 Speaker 1: qualified to formally assess anybody's memory, including his own. Thirty 117 00:08:36,955 --> 00:08:40,395 Speaker 1: stories about this, thirty three in the Washington Post in 118 00:08:40,435 --> 00:08:43,675 Speaker 1: the same span, eighteen more in the Wall Street Journal, 119 00:08:43,755 --> 00:08:50,555 Speaker 1: eighty one in four days, all told when Trump, in 120 00:08:50,595 --> 00:08:55,235 Speaker 1: real time called Nancy Pelosi Nicki Haley repeatedly and insisted 121 00:08:55,315 --> 00:08:58,155 Speaker 1: Nicki Haley was in charge of security at the Capitol. 122 00:08:58,155 --> 00:09:02,275 Speaker 1: On January sixth, the same three papers wrote fifteen stories. 123 00:09:04,875 --> 00:09:06,715 Speaker 1: Four were in The New York Times. Three of them 124 00:09:06,755 --> 00:09:10,075 Speaker 1: mentioned only that Haley was using what was in reality 125 00:09:10,155 --> 00:09:14,755 Speaker 1: Trump's live mental disaster as an attack line against him. 126 00:09:17,075 --> 00:09:23,515 Speaker 1: No evaluation of Trump, just horse race. Yesterday, while not 127 00:09:23,555 --> 00:09:26,235 Speaker 1: the first to do something like this, Politico posted a 128 00:09:26,315 --> 00:09:30,155 Speaker 1: fourteen hundred word article titled Democrats might need a Plan B. 129 00:09:30,355 --> 00:09:34,115 Speaker 1: Here's what it looks like In case you missed Politico's 130 00:09:34,155 --> 00:09:38,155 Speaker 1: attempt to launch a catchphrase, the article begins, so far, 131 00:09:38,315 --> 00:09:41,435 Speaker 1: Democrats have vigorously avoided any discussion of a Plan B 132 00:09:42,155 --> 00:09:45,635 Speaker 1: for their presidential nominee, but Special Counsel Robert Hurr's report 133 00:09:45,715 --> 00:09:49,915 Speaker 1: may have forced their hand. They used Plan B again 134 00:09:49,995 --> 00:09:53,755 Speaker 1: later in the text, and a four decade friend of 135 00:09:53,795 --> 00:09:57,435 Speaker 1: mine went on Slee's weasel Bill Maher's show Friday Night 136 00:09:57,995 --> 00:10:02,395 Speaker 1: and described the Biden issue as emperor's new clothes stuff. 137 00:10:03,435 --> 00:10:05,555 Speaker 1: And he said that if the president sident won't decline 138 00:10:05,595 --> 00:10:10,755 Speaker 1: renomination quote, he has to be shown the door. I'm 139 00:10:10,835 --> 00:10:12,635 Speaker 1: leaving his name out of this because I still have 140 00:10:12,715 --> 00:10:15,755 Speaker 1: hope of saving him. And when I asked him to 141 00:10:15,835 --> 00:10:19,795 Speaker 1: name one actual thing or policy or issue that Joe 142 00:10:19,835 --> 00:10:24,155 Speaker 1: Biden had fumbled as president, he could not. Plus I 143 00:10:24,195 --> 00:10:26,195 Speaker 1: know from experience, if you sit too close to mar 144 00:10:26,955 --> 00:10:30,235 Speaker 1: it appears that the smug stupidity is highly contagious, and 145 00:10:30,275 --> 00:10:35,595 Speaker 1: hopefully the infection is temporary. So we go from hers 146 00:10:35,675 --> 00:10:40,195 Speaker 1: malfeasance to the lying at NBC and ABC to bending 147 00:10:40,235 --> 00:10:42,555 Speaker 1: over so far backwards you fall flat on your face 148 00:10:42,595 --> 00:10:44,875 Speaker 1: at the Times and the Post, and the refusal to 149 00:10:44,875 --> 00:10:47,915 Speaker 1: call Trump insane and hilarian, but the near joy at 150 00:10:47,915 --> 00:10:50,075 Speaker 1: being able to quote somebody else saying Biden has a 151 00:10:50,075 --> 00:10:53,515 Speaker 1: bad memory. We didn't say that, that guy over there did. 152 00:10:53,555 --> 00:10:56,915 Speaker 1: We're just quoting him. We're the news. And we go 153 00:10:57,715 --> 00:11:03,155 Speaker 1: from these ten thousand thumbs on the scale of political 154 00:11:03,235 --> 00:11:09,035 Speaker 1: outcomes to this is Emperor's new clothes stuff, and Democrats 155 00:11:09,115 --> 00:11:13,475 Speaker 1: might need a plan B. Well, yeah, I guess just 156 00:11:13,955 --> 00:11:17,995 Speaker 1: bring out that perfect candidate you've been hiding off stage 157 00:11:18,075 --> 00:11:21,435 Speaker 1: to replace Biden. And since that perfect candidate would be 158 00:11:21,555 --> 00:11:24,795 Speaker 1: running in a vacuum, and we could, you know, transfer 159 00:11:24,835 --> 00:11:27,555 Speaker 1: it from Joe to mister perfect over here. We get 160 00:11:27,555 --> 00:11:30,475 Speaker 1: it done in forty five minutes and our tops. This 161 00:11:30,515 --> 00:11:36,915 Speaker 1: will be settled by nightfall. Plan B Emperor's new clothes. 162 00:11:38,875 --> 00:11:43,515 Speaker 1: Has anybody war gained this because this would not happen 163 00:11:43,955 --> 00:11:47,515 Speaker 1: in a vacuum. I mean, forget for one moment the 164 00:11:47,995 --> 00:11:53,915 Speaker 1: alternative candidates. And by the way, name one. Forget the realities. 165 00:11:55,395 --> 00:11:57,875 Speaker 1: Name me as my friend could not one presidential policy, 166 00:11:57,915 --> 00:12:00,915 Speaker 1: one presidential duty, one presidential decision that has been affected 167 00:12:00,915 --> 00:12:04,635 Speaker 1: by whatever you perceive or whatever you think others press 168 00:12:05,155 --> 00:12:08,755 Speaker 1: about the president's acuity. Forget for now what motives the 169 00:12:08,795 --> 00:12:13,515 Speaker 1: Republicans might have for constantly suggesting the Democrats might have 170 00:12:13,635 --> 00:12:16,595 Speaker 1: to change candidates might be about to change candidates might 171 00:12:16,635 --> 00:12:20,355 Speaker 1: have a plan B. Forget that, forget the impossible bloodiness 172 00:12:20,395 --> 00:12:22,755 Speaker 1: of the process, and forget the fact that in the 173 00:12:22,755 --> 00:12:26,315 Speaker 1: next two weeks the filing deadlines for all the Democratic 174 00:12:26,435 --> 00:12:31,355 Speaker 1: primaries close in all but six states. Let's forget all 175 00:12:31,395 --> 00:12:33,515 Speaker 1: that for the moment and cut to the chase. It 176 00:12:33,675 --> 00:12:39,715 Speaker 1: somehow has happened. Biden is off the ballot. What happens next? 177 00:12:42,395 --> 00:12:45,555 Speaker 1: What happens next is first, Trump spends the rest of 178 00:12:45,555 --> 00:12:51,515 Speaker 1: the campaign claiming he has already won. He forced Biden out, 179 00:12:52,115 --> 00:12:55,755 Speaker 1: he already beat Biden. Biden is the president, and obviously 180 00:12:55,795 --> 00:12:58,595 Speaker 1: Biden dropped out because he's afraid of Trump. Trump beat 181 00:12:58,635 --> 00:13:01,995 Speaker 1: the president, so maybe Biden should resign now. And Trump 182 00:13:02,115 --> 00:13:03,875 Speaker 1: might be nuts enough to claim that he should take 183 00:13:03,915 --> 00:13:06,395 Speaker 1: over immediately, even though there's no legal way to do that, 184 00:13:07,795 --> 00:13:11,515 Speaker 1: and even if he isn't that nuts. Trump immediately declares 185 00:13:11,515 --> 00:13:13,595 Speaker 1: that the Democrats in the Deep State are so afraid 186 00:13:13,595 --> 00:13:17,395 Speaker 1: of him that they have conceded and replaced the sitting president, 187 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:21,075 Speaker 1: that they're too afraid to have their sitting president run 188 00:13:21,115 --> 00:13:23,475 Speaker 1: against him. They're afraid of him. They should be afraid 189 00:13:23,475 --> 00:13:26,035 Speaker 1: of him. He will say he is always right. He 190 00:13:26,115 --> 00:13:28,835 Speaker 1: was right about Biden, wasn't he He was right about 191 00:13:28,835 --> 00:13:31,195 Speaker 1: the country. The country is him, He is the country. 192 00:13:31,755 --> 00:13:34,475 Speaker 1: He is grateful that you have chosen him. And now 193 00:13:34,715 --> 00:13:38,035 Speaker 1: he will not deport two million Hispanics, He'll deport twenty 194 00:13:38,075 --> 00:13:43,595 Speaker 1: million Hispanics. Because he is always right. See, he was 195 00:13:43,715 --> 00:13:48,035 Speaker 1: right about Biden. And now he'll also tell you that 196 00:13:48,115 --> 00:13:52,195 Speaker 1: he is right about whoever replaced Biden. And he will 197 00:13:52,195 --> 00:13:58,195 Speaker 1: insist that whoever replaces Biden is worse than Biden. And 198 00:13:58,315 --> 00:14:01,075 Speaker 1: he will insist this is still just another Democrat Party 199 00:14:01,155 --> 00:14:04,635 Speaker 1: dirty trick, a switch or roule. They had this planned. 200 00:14:04,755 --> 00:14:07,035 Speaker 1: Of course I knew it was going to happen. They 201 00:14:07,115 --> 00:14:10,995 Speaker 1: had Plan B. I read it in the papers months ago. 202 00:14:11,435 --> 00:14:14,395 Speaker 1: They make a Plan B. Well, I'm going to Plan B. 203 00:14:14,595 --> 00:14:18,275 Speaker 1: Trump will say, there's no reason for me to debate 204 00:14:18,675 --> 00:14:26,995 Speaker 1: their Plan B. Guy. And of course it's even more 205 00:14:27,075 --> 00:14:30,515 Speaker 1: clear than ever. Trump will say that you know who 206 00:14:30,595 --> 00:14:34,755 Speaker 1: made all of this happen? Who made Biden chop out? 207 00:14:34,795 --> 00:14:37,475 Speaker 1: I mean besides him, you know who made this happen. 208 00:14:38,755 --> 00:14:43,715 Speaker 1: God made it happen, because Trump has been chosen by God. 209 00:14:45,955 --> 00:14:48,635 Speaker 1: He'll now play that creepy QAnon music at the start 210 00:14:48,675 --> 00:14:50,635 Speaker 1: of every one of his hitler rallies, not just at 211 00:14:50,675 --> 00:14:55,635 Speaker 1: the end. He'll say it, at some point, we shouldn't 212 00:14:55,635 --> 00:15:00,155 Speaker 1: even bother to have an election, and even in our 213 00:15:00,235 --> 00:15:03,395 Speaker 1: war game, if somehow Trump does not go that nuts. 214 00:15:04,035 --> 00:15:08,515 Speaker 1: He would be able to say real things, real things 215 00:15:08,595 --> 00:15:15,275 Speaker 1: that would actually be real and are startling enough. Who 216 00:15:15,355 --> 00:15:18,315 Speaker 1: is now the only candidate running for president with experience? 217 00:15:18,355 --> 00:15:21,155 Speaker 1: He can say, who is the only candidate who's ever 218 00:15:21,195 --> 00:15:26,915 Speaker 1: been president? How can you trust somebody without experience? Also, 219 00:15:27,035 --> 00:15:31,955 Speaker 1: Biden is a lame duck. His policies must be ignored, stopped, frozen. 220 00:15:32,675 --> 00:15:35,235 Speaker 1: Of course, we were right to destroy the border deal. 221 00:15:35,435 --> 00:15:39,515 Speaker 1: I told you so. Now we have to destroy anything 222 00:15:39,555 --> 00:15:44,035 Speaker 1: else Biden tries to do to sabotage me before I 223 00:15:44,195 --> 00:15:48,595 Speaker 1: regain power. Oh, by the way, obviously the Department of 224 00:15:48,715 --> 00:15:51,035 Speaker 1: Justice now has to drop all those charges against me 225 00:15:51,315 --> 00:15:55,275 Speaker 1: because they were just Biden campaigned dirty tricks. Why didn't 226 00:15:55,315 --> 00:15:59,235 Speaker 1: one of their own special prosecutors say he was crazy? 227 00:16:00,315 --> 00:16:03,115 Speaker 1: In fact, Go ahead, conduct the trials. I don't care. 228 00:16:03,275 --> 00:16:05,635 Speaker 1: I won't show up, I won't be my lawyers won't 229 00:16:05,675 --> 00:16:09,635 Speaker 1: be there. Go ahead, try to make me Joe Biden 230 00:16:09,755 --> 00:16:13,035 Speaker 1: just dropped out. We don't have a president. Try to 231 00:16:13,195 --> 00:16:16,395 Speaker 1: make me go to court, try to testify against me. 232 00:16:16,755 --> 00:16:22,835 Speaker 1: January twentieth is coming, come to think of it. He 233 00:16:22,875 --> 00:16:25,555 Speaker 1: will then say, why would we let an untried rookie 234 00:16:25,635 --> 00:16:29,795 Speaker 1: president with no experience control the House or the Senate. 235 00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:33,715 Speaker 1: Why would we deny me the right to control the 236 00:16:33,715 --> 00:16:36,395 Speaker 1: House of the Senate. You now have to vote the 237 00:16:36,435 --> 00:16:39,155 Speaker 1: Democrats out of control of the Senate, Trump would say, 238 00:16:39,835 --> 00:16:42,355 Speaker 1: and keep them from regaining the House. And depending on 239 00:16:42,435 --> 00:16:46,075 Speaker 1: how badly the new Democrat would pull against him, Trump 240 00:16:46,195 --> 00:16:51,715 Speaker 1: might even do something generous about the House and the 241 00:16:51,755 --> 00:16:56,155 Speaker 1: Senate and direct late funding spreeze on behalf of Republican 242 00:16:56,195 --> 00:17:00,835 Speaker 1: candidates other than himself, the ones running in those races, 243 00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:05,315 Speaker 1: because the polls and the swing state poll are all 244 00:17:05,395 --> 00:17:07,915 Speaker 1: over the place, and there has not been reliable polling 245 00:17:07,915 --> 00:17:12,115 Speaker 1: on all those better candidates hiding off stage, all those 246 00:17:12,155 --> 00:17:14,475 Speaker 1: planned B and C and D and F and Q 247 00:17:14,675 --> 00:17:17,595 Speaker 1: and Z that some liberals think the Democrats have in 248 00:17:17,635 --> 00:17:19,995 Speaker 1: one of those containers marked in the event of emergency 249 00:17:20,035 --> 00:17:26,715 Speaker 1: break glass. In November, Fox polled this and their polling 250 00:17:26,795 --> 00:17:30,035 Speaker 1: is no better or worse than anybody else's. And in 251 00:17:30,075 --> 00:17:32,755 Speaker 1: November it was Trump fifty to forty five over Vice 252 00:17:32,795 --> 00:17:38,115 Speaker 1: President Harris Trump forty nine forty five over Governor Newsom, 253 00:17:38,635 --> 00:17:41,995 Speaker 1: Trump forty eight forty six over Governor Whitmer. No polling 254 00:17:42,035 --> 00:17:45,515 Speaker 1: about JB. Pritzker or Josh Shapiro or Roy Cooper or 255 00:17:45,515 --> 00:17:48,915 Speaker 1: any non politicians. And I swear to god I had 256 00:17:48,955 --> 00:17:53,915 Speaker 1: to double check who Roy Cooper was the best number, 257 00:17:55,235 --> 00:18:04,475 Speaker 1: Trump by just forty seven, forty six over mansion. Now, seriously, 258 00:18:04,995 --> 00:18:09,635 Speaker 1: Joe Manchin, and if you want a real plot twist 259 00:18:09,675 --> 00:18:13,595 Speaker 1: in our computer game for your post Biden wargames, consider 260 00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:16,235 Speaker 1: the possibility that the candidate the Democrats turned to is 261 00:18:16,275 --> 00:18:20,795 Speaker 1: not a Democrat at all. He's Joe Manson. Because it's 262 00:18:20,875 --> 00:18:23,035 Speaker 1: very nice to assume that the only problem here is 263 00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:25,795 Speaker 1: how the media has portrayed President Biden. And he's done 264 00:18:25,795 --> 00:18:27,635 Speaker 1: a great job, but he's got to get out of 265 00:18:27,675 --> 00:18:29,995 Speaker 1: the way. Well, we pull the rabbit out of the hat, 266 00:18:30,555 --> 00:18:36,955 Speaker 1: and it's Michelle Obama. First of all, she's not going 267 00:18:37,035 --> 00:18:43,955 Speaker 1: to do it. And if Q your magical thinking that changes, well, 268 00:18:44,035 --> 00:18:46,795 Speaker 1: let's go back to our wargame computer and Trump's response 269 00:18:46,835 --> 00:18:51,075 Speaker 1: to that is told you Biden was being run by 270 00:18:51,075 --> 00:18:54,635 Speaker 1: the Obamas. I didn't make any gaffs when I called 271 00:18:54,675 --> 00:19:00,715 Speaker 1: Biden Obama, because I meant Michelle Obama, deep state, deep 272 00:19:00,715 --> 00:19:03,835 Speaker 1: state rigged fix which hunt hoax, and this will really 273 00:19:03,835 --> 00:19:07,075 Speaker 1: be Barack Obama's third term and that's unconstitutional, but it 274 00:19:07,115 --> 00:19:10,635 Speaker 1: isn't unconstitutional for her and him. It shouldn't be unconstitutional 275 00:19:10,675 --> 00:19:13,115 Speaker 1: for me. So wave the twenty fifth Amendment. I'll serve 276 00:19:13,395 --> 00:19:17,355 Speaker 1: three terms until I'm eighty six. Eighty six is not 277 00:19:17,435 --> 00:19:21,475 Speaker 1: too old. You can tell I'm not feeble, I'm loud. 278 00:19:23,915 --> 00:19:30,115 Speaker 1: And this is my wife, Nancy Pelosi. By the way, 279 00:19:30,155 --> 00:19:35,595 Speaker 1: I haven't seen any actual polling on Michelle Obama's presidential campaign, 280 00:19:35,795 --> 00:19:38,435 Speaker 1: which she has sworn she would never do in a 281 00:19:38,555 --> 00:19:41,235 Speaker 1: million years. I haven't seen any polling on that since 282 00:19:41,275 --> 00:19:45,515 Speaker 1: twenty twenty, when forty percent of independence and seventy eight 283 00:19:45,515 --> 00:19:52,515 Speaker 1: percent of Republicans viewed her negatively. So now another spin 284 00:19:52,635 --> 00:19:55,435 Speaker 1: of the wheel of our war game. Our war game 285 00:19:55,475 --> 00:19:57,955 Speaker 1: which still has not addressed the impact on the campaign 286 00:19:58,075 --> 00:20:03,355 Speaker 1: of the Democrats forcing a sitting president off the ticket 287 00:20:03,795 --> 00:20:09,995 Speaker 1: by more magical thinking. To make it worthwhile, we have 288 00:20:10,115 --> 00:20:12,955 Speaker 1: to either convince Michelle Obama to run, and we still 289 00:20:12,995 --> 00:20:15,955 Speaker 1: haven't seen enough pulling to make sure that's worth the bloodbath. 290 00:20:16,075 --> 00:20:19,075 Speaker 1: Unless you have Taylor Swift's phone number and she's tired 291 00:20:19,075 --> 00:20:26,675 Speaker 1: of having fun and wants to be president. Congratulations, you 292 00:20:26,755 --> 00:20:29,995 Speaker 1: have now removed the incumbent president of the United States 293 00:20:30,035 --> 00:20:33,755 Speaker 1: and every drop of his name recognition and everybody who 294 00:20:33,795 --> 00:20:38,155 Speaker 1: actually thinks he's done a good job, and his improving 295 00:20:38,235 --> 00:20:42,955 Speaker 1: economy and his status as the only candidate to defeat Trump, 296 00:20:43,675 --> 00:20:48,235 Speaker 1: and in his place, your wargame has given you your 297 00:20:48,355 --> 00:20:52,915 Speaker 1: new nominee, Michelle Obama, who you can't convince to run. 298 00:20:53,155 --> 00:20:55,715 Speaker 1: And when you can't convince her to run, you have 299 00:20:56,475 --> 00:21:00,795 Speaker 1: Taylor Swift, who won't run, and who the fascists have 300 00:21:00,835 --> 00:21:06,435 Speaker 1: been dirtying up for the last three months. Just in case. Now, 301 00:21:07,715 --> 00:21:10,995 Speaker 1: let's not cut to the chase and wargame this back 302 00:21:10,995 --> 00:21:13,715 Speaker 1: from the beginning, from right now. It would be one 303 00:21:13,875 --> 00:21:19,315 Speaker 1: thing if President Biden were to say, like today, I've 304 00:21:19,315 --> 00:21:22,115 Speaker 1: done the math and i had a long talk with 305 00:21:22,155 --> 00:21:24,595 Speaker 1: my wife and my family, and i think I'm not 306 00:21:24,715 --> 00:21:27,355 Speaker 1: up for this, and I'm not sure i can beat him, 307 00:21:27,435 --> 00:21:30,875 Speaker 1: and I'm withdrawing, and I have my new friend over here, 308 00:21:30,915 --> 00:21:39,195 Speaker 1: Stanley plan b That is still a mess. If deep 309 00:21:39,235 --> 00:21:43,275 Speaker 1: sixing his drawbacks actually does increase the democratic likelihood of 310 00:21:43,355 --> 00:21:46,195 Speaker 1: retaining the White House, how much are they offset by 311 00:21:46,195 --> 00:21:49,835 Speaker 1: the Trump gloating response mentioned earlier and the lame duck 312 00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:52,835 Speaker 1: presidency that would follow, and then the oldest, most cynical 313 00:21:52,875 --> 00:21:57,275 Speaker 1: cliche about the party actually becoming justifiable in the pages 314 00:21:57,355 --> 00:22:05,635 Speaker 1: of the New York Times, Democrats in disarray? What the 315 00:22:05,675 --> 00:22:09,715 Speaker 1: hell kind of instant presidential primary do you expect will 316 00:22:09,795 --> 00:22:15,115 Speaker 1: follow that? Oh, we must defeat Trump, we must be 317 00:22:15,275 --> 00:22:23,635 Speaker 1: unified to save the democracy and kumbaya And do you 318 00:22:23,675 --> 00:22:28,995 Speaker 1: remember Richard Oheeda? Does the name Seth Moulton mean anything 319 00:22:29,035 --> 00:22:39,035 Speaker 1: to you? Steve Bullock, John Delaney, Wayne Messim In twenty seventeen, 320 00:22:39,235 --> 00:22:42,995 Speaker 1: twenty eighteen, and twenty nineteen, the number of Democrats who 321 00:22:43,035 --> 00:22:46,355 Speaker 1: said we must defeat Trump. And when I say we, 322 00:22:46,675 --> 00:22:49,995 Speaker 1: I mean me, I'm the person to do it. The 323 00:22:50,075 --> 00:22:56,355 Speaker 1: number of Democrats who began presidential campaigns totaled twenty eight, 324 00:22:57,595 --> 00:23:04,635 Speaker 1: including Richard Oheeda, Seth Moulten, Steve Bullock, John Delaney, Wayne 325 00:23:05,035 --> 00:23:10,155 Speaker 1: mess Him and Haulsey Gabbard and Bill Effing de Blasio. 326 00:23:12,835 --> 00:23:17,435 Speaker 1: Because if Joe Biden withdrew tomorrow or resigned the presidency 327 00:23:17,475 --> 00:23:22,195 Speaker 1: tomorrow or was forced out somehow tomorrow and he said 328 00:23:22,795 --> 00:23:28,035 Speaker 1: I designate X as my successor, do you assume there 329 00:23:28,115 --> 00:23:32,315 Speaker 1: still wouldn't be a dozen Bill Deblasios thinking my time 330 00:23:32,395 --> 00:23:37,995 Speaker 1: has come, even a Biden endorsed successor. Even Vice President 331 00:23:38,035 --> 00:23:43,195 Speaker 1: Harris would still face a primary. Joe Biden getting out 332 00:23:43,235 --> 00:23:46,555 Speaker 1: of the way for that miracle natural perfect candidate would 333 00:23:46,595 --> 00:23:51,115 Speaker 1: go just as smooth as silk, no conflict, no disarray. 334 00:23:51,715 --> 00:23:58,435 Speaker 1: Still have the primaries filing with signature closes March first 335 00:23:58,475 --> 00:24:00,915 Speaker 1: in all but six states, Well, that would go well. 336 00:24:01,475 --> 00:24:06,675 Speaker 1: Twelve Bill de Blasios and Dean Phillips swarming the nation, 337 00:24:07,315 --> 00:24:14,195 Speaker 1: assaulting passers by with petition clipboards, And that, as it 338 00:24:14,235 --> 00:24:17,155 Speaker 1: will quickly dawn on you, is the best case scenario 339 00:24:18,115 --> 00:24:21,595 Speaker 1: in our wargame for a different candidate, because in all 340 00:24:21,715 --> 00:24:26,475 Speaker 1: the other versions of this wargame, the president is already 341 00:24:27,355 --> 00:24:34,715 Speaker 1: or will inevitably become the official nominee. Those primaries do 342 00:24:35,035 --> 00:24:40,355 Speaker 1: close to new entrants in sixteen days, and the convention 343 00:24:40,435 --> 00:24:42,875 Speaker 1: starts in one hundred and eighty nine days, and some 344 00:24:42,955 --> 00:24:46,915 Speaker 1: of the military ballots go out right after the convention ends. 345 00:24:46,995 --> 00:24:50,315 Speaker 1: And oh, by the way, on September twentieth, early voting 346 00:24:50,395 --> 00:24:53,275 Speaker 1: starts in two states, And there are no mechanisms in 347 00:24:53,355 --> 00:24:57,275 Speaker 1: place in this country for replacing a nominee or a 348 00:24:57,315 --> 00:25:01,995 Speaker 1: presumptive nominee. And it is so shattering and labyrinthine a 349 00:25:02,195 --> 00:25:06,395 Speaker 1: prospect that no party has even seen seriously whispered about 350 00:25:06,435 --> 00:25:11,955 Speaker 1: doing it since the year eighteen sixty four. So this 351 00:25:13,155 --> 00:25:16,395 Speaker 1: spin of the war game ends with a contested series 352 00:25:16,435 --> 00:25:22,235 Speaker 1: of primaries and a possibly violent Democratic convention and maybe litigation. 353 00:25:22,435 --> 00:25:25,555 Speaker 1: And maybe you started this thinking your plan B would 354 00:25:25,595 --> 00:25:30,075 Speaker 1: be Michelle Obama. Sorry, who would have ever thought the 355 00:25:30,155 --> 00:25:33,315 Speaker 1: computer would deduce this, that it would end this way? 356 00:25:33,475 --> 00:25:39,915 Speaker 1: Your twenty twenty four Democratic presidential nominee, Bill de Blasio, 357 00:25:43,995 --> 00:25:47,955 Speaker 1: pressing start on the wargame computer one more time, we 358 00:25:48,075 --> 00:25:52,795 Speaker 1: get the nightmare of all nightmares. There is a conclave 359 00:25:53,475 --> 00:25:56,995 Speaker 1: in which all the leading Democratic powers in the Senate, 360 00:25:57,595 --> 00:26:03,635 Speaker 1: in the House, plus Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Nancy Pelosi, 361 00:26:03,835 --> 00:26:09,275 Speaker 1: Bernie Sanders, Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, d Wit Clinton, Gavin Newsom, 362 00:26:10,035 --> 00:26:13,995 Speaker 1: Taylor Swift, they all agree and they all go into 363 00:26:14,035 --> 00:26:16,755 Speaker 1: the Oval Office and they say, mister President, it is 364 00:26:16,835 --> 00:26:22,715 Speaker 1: now unavoidable. You have to relinquish the nomination. She says 365 00:26:22,795 --> 00:26:28,995 Speaker 1: she will do it, and Taylor blushes sweetly and says 366 00:26:29,475 --> 00:26:33,675 Speaker 1: the tortured President's to her, and Joe Biden laughs that 367 00:26:33,755 --> 00:26:39,315 Speaker 1: marvelous laugh of his and says, no, get out, And 368 00:26:39,355 --> 00:26:44,075 Speaker 1: what do you do? Then, because then the mere fact 369 00:26:44,155 --> 00:26:46,995 Speaker 1: that you went in and asked him to relinquish the nomination, 370 00:26:47,995 --> 00:26:51,555 Speaker 1: that fact really isn't likely to remain a secret for 371 00:26:51,675 --> 00:26:57,035 Speaker 1: more than four or five seconds. And when it stops 372 00:26:57,115 --> 00:27:00,755 Speaker 1: being the secret, it then splits the Democratic Party in two. 373 00:27:01,475 --> 00:27:04,075 Speaker 1: And let's check back on the other side of this 374 00:27:04,115 --> 00:27:06,995 Speaker 1: war game, and Trump does what Then, Trump now says, 375 00:27:07,835 --> 00:27:10,035 Speaker 1: in the first thing he's ever said in his life 376 00:27:10,115 --> 00:27:13,075 Speaker 1: that is not in whole or in part a lie. 377 00:27:13,275 --> 00:27:18,755 Speaker 1: Trump then says, the Democratic Party is running an insurrection 378 00:27:19,035 --> 00:27:26,755 Speaker 1: against the sitting president of the United States. So at 379 00:27:26,755 --> 00:27:29,955 Speaker 1: that point you are left with the following an incumbent 380 00:27:29,995 --> 00:27:34,555 Speaker 1: president who you yourself have just mortally wounded, who is 381 00:27:34,595 --> 00:27:38,235 Speaker 1: going to be on the ballot anyway, And you have 382 00:27:38,315 --> 00:27:42,555 Speaker 1: thereby handed the dictatorship of the United States to Trump 383 00:27:42,635 --> 00:27:48,435 Speaker 1: by fifty five to forty five, sixty to forty or 384 00:27:48,515 --> 00:27:52,515 Speaker 1: maybe you've sent half the Democratic voters to third party candidates, 385 00:27:52,555 --> 00:27:56,795 Speaker 1: and whoo, there's a chance. RFK Junior finishes second, and 386 00:27:56,875 --> 00:27:59,915 Speaker 1: for the first time since nineteen twelve, the incumbent president 387 00:27:59,955 --> 00:28:02,995 Speaker 1: of the United States finishes third in a two man race. 388 00:28:04,835 --> 00:28:09,555 Speaker 1: This is where our wargame ends. Congratulations, my friend, you 389 00:28:09,635 --> 00:28:19,795 Speaker 1: have nuked the United States of America as a free country. 390 00:28:20,595 --> 00:28:23,875 Speaker 1: But the audience at the Bill Mahershaw applauded, in woohooed. 391 00:28:26,795 --> 00:28:28,675 Speaker 1: And on the other hand, you are now in possession 392 00:28:28,675 --> 00:28:31,755 Speaker 1: of the answer to the only hypothetical I have posited 393 00:28:31,835 --> 00:28:35,835 Speaker 1: here without circling back to it, the only question that 394 00:28:35,915 --> 00:28:38,755 Speaker 1: I raised but had not offered an answer to, And 395 00:28:38,795 --> 00:28:43,595 Speaker 1: that question was, and you now know why they have 396 00:28:43,795 --> 00:28:49,635 Speaker 1: done this. That question was what motives might the Republicans 397 00:28:49,675 --> 00:28:54,795 Speaker 1: and Trump have had for constantly suggesting that the Democrats 398 00:28:55,755 --> 00:29:08,035 Speaker 1: would change candidates interest a lot of headlines. Trump goes 399 00:29:08,075 --> 00:29:11,115 Speaker 1: to the Supreme Court, still insisting on presidential immunity, arguing 400 00:29:11,155 --> 00:29:13,115 Speaker 1: in two hundred and thirty four years of American history, 401 00:29:13,115 --> 00:29:17,235 Speaker 1: no president was ever prosecuted for his official acts. Well, 402 00:29:17,715 --> 00:29:20,715 Speaker 1: maybe that's because none of the others were traitorous rapists. 403 00:29:22,315 --> 00:29:28,315 Speaker 1: That's next. This is countdown. This is countdown with Keith Olberman. 404 00:29:49,955 --> 00:29:55,155 Speaker 1: Trump legal postcripts to the news. Some headlines, some updates, 405 00:29:55,195 --> 00:30:03,875 Speaker 1: some snark, some predictions, dateline, Trump Land. Trump's lawyers beat 406 00:30:03,915 --> 00:30:06,715 Speaker 1: the deadline. Not only did they file to the Supreme 407 00:30:06,755 --> 00:30:10,035 Speaker 1: Court asking it to overturn the three Judge Appeals Panel 408 00:30:10,075 --> 00:30:12,995 Speaker 1: after it took the presidential immunity filing paperwork and lit 409 00:30:12,995 --> 00:30:15,475 Speaker 1: it on fire and said, oh, you want another opinion, 410 00:30:15,675 --> 00:30:19,515 Speaker 1: you're also ugly. It also asked Scotus to have the 411 00:30:19,675 --> 00:30:23,195 Speaker 1: entire district court review the case again, which the entire 412 00:30:23,235 --> 00:30:26,875 Speaker 1: district Court is unlikely to do because you know the 413 00:30:26,995 --> 00:30:30,555 Speaker 1: risk of burning its fingers. If you wonder sometimes if 414 00:30:30,595 --> 00:30:33,035 Speaker 1: Trump is just making up the story of having grown 415 00:30:33,115 --> 00:30:37,115 Speaker 1: up in Queens and he's actually from Easter Island or 416 00:30:37,315 --> 00:30:42,315 Speaker 1: Mars or somewhere. The filing includes a statement of well 417 00:30:42,515 --> 00:30:47,155 Speaker 1: faked pain that nobody has agreed with the history of 418 00:30:47,355 --> 00:30:51,955 Speaker 1: presidential immunity thing that Trump and his lawyers made up 419 00:30:52,075 --> 00:30:55,515 Speaker 1: out of thin air. It is in the filing a 420 00:30:55,595 --> 00:31:01,115 Speaker 1: quote stunning breach of precedent and historical norms. I was 421 00:31:01,155 --> 00:31:04,555 Speaker 1: looking for the footnote that read not in this country. 422 00:31:04,715 --> 00:31:06,915 Speaker 1: In two hundred and thirty four years of American history, 423 00:31:06,955 --> 00:31:10,035 Speaker 1: no president was ever prosecuted for his official acts, nor 424 00:31:10,075 --> 00:31:13,875 Speaker 1: should they be. Unquote no comment from the ghost of 425 00:31:13,955 --> 00:31:18,395 Speaker 1: Gerald Ford, wondering what in the almighty f he bothered 426 00:31:18,435 --> 00:31:26,355 Speaker 1: to pardon Richard Nixon four dateline Fort Pierce, Florida, Trump 427 00:31:26,355 --> 00:31:29,835 Speaker 1: got to say, howdy, who is concierge Judge Eileen Cannon, 428 00:31:30,075 --> 00:31:33,755 Speaker 1: the former Flamenco dancing and yoga correspondent of the Miami 429 00:31:33,875 --> 00:31:37,555 Speaker 1: El Nuevo Herald newspaper, And I wish I were making 430 00:31:37,555 --> 00:31:41,035 Speaker 1: that up. Two closed door meetings yesterday with the defense 431 00:31:41,035 --> 00:31:44,995 Speaker 1: in the classified documents case. Wonder what Kristin Welker will 432 00:31:44,995 --> 00:31:48,635 Speaker 1: do with that story next week? Trump had documents stolen 433 00:31:48,675 --> 00:31:53,115 Speaker 1: from him in a secured document's facility. The defense offered 434 00:31:53,155 --> 00:31:56,075 Speaker 1: its theories that it may use a trial and why 435 00:31:56,115 --> 00:31:58,955 Speaker 1: it should get to see all the documents, the kinds 436 00:31:59,035 --> 00:32:02,355 Speaker 1: of which Trump stole last time. Many lies were told, 437 00:32:02,395 --> 00:32:04,835 Speaker 1: and we were hoping somebody kept their eye out for 438 00:32:04,875 --> 00:32:09,995 Speaker 1: Trump lifting more documents and hiding them under his extra chins. 439 00:32:10,595 --> 00:32:12,955 Speaker 1: It's probably time for the Department of Justice to make 440 00:32:12,995 --> 00:32:16,475 Speaker 1: the motions to remove Judge Cannon. Judge Cannon recently let 441 00:32:16,515 --> 00:32:20,235 Speaker 1: Trump's lawyers see evidence about threats to potential witnesses against him. 442 00:32:20,595 --> 00:32:22,915 Speaker 1: In other words, she made it easier for him to 443 00:32:23,035 --> 00:32:27,155 Speaker 1: arrange more threats against witnesses against him. They should remove 444 00:32:27,195 --> 00:32:30,195 Speaker 1: her for not even making it look like she's not 445 00:32:30,275 --> 00:32:33,235 Speaker 1: paying Trump back for having given her a job where 446 00:32:33,235 --> 00:32:36,395 Speaker 1: she does not have to write stories about flamenco and 447 00:32:36,715 --> 00:32:43,955 Speaker 1: yoga and dateline JD. Vance's Eyeliner Cabinet. It started early 448 00:32:43,995 --> 00:32:45,715 Speaker 1: in the day when Vance said that the bill to 449 00:32:45,755 --> 00:32:49,395 Speaker 1: resume aid to Ukraine through September twenty twenty five was 450 00:32:49,475 --> 00:32:52,395 Speaker 1: in fact a long term plot to impeach Trump in 451 00:32:52,515 --> 00:32:57,555 Speaker 1: twenty twenty five because he intends to stop sending Ukraine money. Then, 452 00:32:57,635 --> 00:33:00,675 Speaker 1: on his show The Trump Junior Hour brought to You 453 00:33:00,715 --> 00:33:05,075 Speaker 1: by Snow, the Quicker Picker, Upper Dondee explained that is 454 00:33:05,115 --> 00:33:08,995 Speaker 1: intending to cut off the aid to Ukraine on January twentieth. 455 00:33:09,675 --> 00:33:14,155 Speaker 1: Between that and Trump Senior encouraging Russia to attack American 456 00:33:14,235 --> 00:33:17,515 Speaker 1: allies we are bound by treaty to protect. This is 457 00:33:17,555 --> 00:33:20,635 Speaker 1: a little reminder that returning Trump to power is like 458 00:33:20,835 --> 00:33:27,755 Speaker 1: inviting Putin to invade us again. Okay, I brought up 459 00:33:27,795 --> 00:33:30,355 Speaker 1: the sleeves weasel before. Permit me to tell you again 460 00:33:30,435 --> 00:33:33,515 Speaker 1: the day in college I nearly punched Bill Maher out, 461 00:33:34,635 --> 00:33:37,275 Speaker 1: and then again thirty years later I nearly punched Bill 462 00:33:37,395 --> 00:33:41,555 Speaker 1: Ayer out. The older I get, the more I regret 463 00:33:42,235 --> 00:33:54,275 Speaker 1: missing such God sent opportunities. That's next this countdown Sometime 464 00:33:54,315 --> 00:33:58,035 Speaker 1: in nineteen eighty five or nineteen eighty six, I saw 465 00:33:58,075 --> 00:34:01,555 Speaker 1: a movie on cable called DC Cab. There was a character, 466 00:34:01,635 --> 00:34:04,435 Speaker 1: and it clearly the actor portraying him was talented and funny. 467 00:34:04,755 --> 00:34:06,755 Speaker 1: But for some reason I felt like I knew him 468 00:34:06,755 --> 00:34:10,635 Speaker 1: from somewhere, and I really didn't like him. I remember 469 00:34:10,675 --> 00:34:13,435 Speaker 1: the feeling was so strong that I stuck around to 470 00:34:13,475 --> 00:34:15,875 Speaker 1: watch the credits to find out who he was. His 471 00:34:15,995 --> 00:34:21,915 Speaker 1: name was Bill Mayher mh er Well. I had a 472 00:34:21,915 --> 00:34:24,675 Speaker 1: teacher named Bill Mayer, but his name had a y 473 00:34:24,795 --> 00:34:26,755 Speaker 1: in it. He was my advisor in high school. Now 474 00:34:26,755 --> 00:34:29,915 Speaker 1: it wasn't him, but I knew three things. He was talented, 475 00:34:30,155 --> 00:34:33,115 Speaker 1: I didn't like him, and I knew him from somewhere. 476 00:34:34,115 --> 00:34:36,435 Speaker 1: This is pre Internet, of course, so no way to 477 00:34:36,435 --> 00:34:40,315 Speaker 1: find out where I knew him from. Hallowell's annual film 478 00:34:40,355 --> 00:34:42,315 Speaker 1: Guide would be my best bet. Maybe he'd be in 479 00:34:42,355 --> 00:34:46,355 Speaker 1: the new one coming out. Checked calendar just eight or 480 00:34:46,475 --> 00:34:50,315 Speaker 1: nine months from now. Eventually I found out Bill Maher 481 00:34:50,355 --> 00:34:52,915 Speaker 1: was in the year ahead of mine at Cornell University. 482 00:34:52,955 --> 00:34:55,075 Speaker 1: He was not at my radio station. He was not 483 00:34:55,235 --> 00:34:58,395 Speaker 1: in my college. Maybe I knew him from a class somewhere. 484 00:34:58,835 --> 00:35:01,675 Speaker 1: I could never nail it. Down. I like to say 485 00:35:01,675 --> 00:35:05,115 Speaker 1: I have a photographic memory, but it's all polaroids, and 486 00:35:05,155 --> 00:35:08,715 Speaker 1: I haven't always bothered to label them. Almost everything that 487 00:35:08,755 --> 00:35:11,755 Speaker 1: ever happened is stuck inside this big empty head of mine. 488 00:35:12,075 --> 00:35:15,715 Speaker 1: But often key details like who, what, when and where 489 00:35:16,075 --> 00:35:21,355 Speaker 1: are just missing. Never wrote him down, and honestly, in 490 00:35:21,395 --> 00:35:23,755 Speaker 1: this case, it was not worth the effort. I knew 491 00:35:23,835 --> 00:35:27,395 Speaker 1: I was was the right word. The word was aware 492 00:35:27,595 --> 00:35:30,715 Speaker 1: of him when we were both in college. Occasionally, especially 493 00:35:30,755 --> 00:35:33,795 Speaker 1: after I went from ESPN to MSNBC in nineteen ninety seven, 494 00:35:34,275 --> 00:35:37,795 Speaker 1: a writer would note the coincidence of university and years 495 00:35:37,835 --> 00:35:39,955 Speaker 1: and ask me about it, and I would say just 496 00:35:39,995 --> 00:35:41,875 Speaker 1: that I don't remember if he was in a class 497 00:35:41,915 --> 00:35:44,755 Speaker 1: with me or I knew him somehow, But I was 498 00:35:44,835 --> 00:35:49,475 Speaker 1: aware of Bill Maher. And then twenty two years ago 499 00:35:49,515 --> 00:35:52,515 Speaker 1: this month, no remember. Twenty third, two thousand, I went 500 00:35:52,555 --> 00:35:55,275 Speaker 1: on his old show, Politically Incorrect, used to be the 501 00:35:55,355 --> 00:35:58,555 Speaker 1: late night show on ABC. This was when I was 502 00:35:58,555 --> 00:36:00,595 Speaker 1: doing sports for Fox in LA and it was an 503 00:36:00,635 --> 00:36:04,795 Speaker 1: all sports episode. Lennox Lewis, the boxer, Mark Cuban, the 504 00:36:04,795 --> 00:36:07,795 Speaker 1: owner of the Dallas Mavericks. Todd Zeal the first basement 505 00:36:07,835 --> 00:36:10,875 Speaker 1: of the new York Mets and me from Fox Sports. 506 00:36:11,035 --> 00:36:13,275 Speaker 1: When I met Bill Maher before the show, I asked 507 00:36:13,315 --> 00:36:15,315 Speaker 1: him about Cornell and whether or not we ran into 508 00:36:15,355 --> 00:36:17,675 Speaker 1: each other. I didn't know anybody there. I didn't see anybody. 509 00:36:17,675 --> 00:36:20,115 Speaker 1: I didn't go comedy anywhere. I didn't talk to anybody. 510 00:36:20,115 --> 00:36:24,475 Speaker 1: I didn't meet you. Okay, excuse me. That settles it. 511 00:36:25,035 --> 00:36:28,115 Speaker 1: Except during the recording of the show, when Mark contradicted 512 00:36:28,155 --> 00:36:31,875 Speaker 1: me on some point, I got angry at him, and 513 00:36:31,915 --> 00:36:34,755 Speaker 1: there was no reason to get angry at him, so 514 00:36:34,835 --> 00:36:37,315 Speaker 1: I dismissed the anger, and I dismissed the moment. Except 515 00:36:37,355 --> 00:36:40,355 Speaker 1: on the way home, I kept thinking, I know him 516 00:36:40,355 --> 00:36:45,195 Speaker 1: from school somehow, no matter what he says, and I 517 00:36:45,315 --> 00:36:51,995 Speaker 1: know I didn't like him in school. In the next decade, 518 00:36:52,035 --> 00:36:54,755 Speaker 1: Bill switched to his weekly HBO political show, and I 519 00:36:54,795 --> 00:36:57,715 Speaker 1: went back and turned MSNBC into a political network. And 520 00:36:57,755 --> 00:37:01,075 Speaker 1: the Internet happened so that Cornell juxtaposition became easier for 521 00:37:01,235 --> 00:37:04,835 Speaker 1: reporters to stumble over, so I would tell them the 522 00:37:04,875 --> 00:37:07,835 Speaker 1: same thing. I can't remember the details, but for twenty 523 00:37:07,915 --> 00:37:10,475 Speaker 1: nine years now I have been convinced I was aware 524 00:37:10,635 --> 00:37:15,915 Speaker 1: of Bill Maher at Cornell. Finally came the day March twentieth, 525 00:37:15,915 --> 00:37:18,715 Speaker 1: two thousand and nine, when they asked me to go 526 00:37:18,835 --> 00:37:22,835 Speaker 1: on Real Time and Bill Maher Cornell University seventy eight 527 00:37:23,315 --> 00:37:27,515 Speaker 1: asked me Cornell University seventy nine, something about colleges, and 528 00:37:27,555 --> 00:37:29,515 Speaker 1: I said, well, as you know, we overlapped at Cornell, 529 00:37:29,555 --> 00:37:30,715 Speaker 1: and I don't know if we met, but I was 530 00:37:30,755 --> 00:37:34,155 Speaker 1: aware of you there, and he intermerupted and said, no, 531 00:37:34,235 --> 00:37:38,755 Speaker 1: you weren't, and I just went back and answered his question. Now, 532 00:37:38,795 --> 00:37:41,995 Speaker 1: after every episode of his program, Mar has or at 533 00:37:42,075 --> 00:37:45,675 Speaker 1: least had a little party backstage, I mean catered with 534 00:37:45,795 --> 00:37:48,755 Speaker 1: booze and with more guests than there are people in 535 00:37:48,795 --> 00:37:52,595 Speaker 1: the studio audience, and usually a bunch of models. Having 536 00:37:52,635 --> 00:37:55,355 Speaker 1: done that show four times, where they will fly you 537 00:37:55,435 --> 00:37:57,235 Speaker 1: in first class and put you up for the weekend 538 00:37:57,275 --> 00:38:00,755 Speaker 1: in LA just to do their show, and there's a party. 539 00:38:01,755 --> 00:38:04,555 Speaker 1: I began to suspect that, like many of the guests, 540 00:38:04,715 --> 00:38:07,675 Speaker 1: Bill Maher does the show just so he can have 541 00:38:07,795 --> 00:38:12,875 Speaker 1: the party. Anyway. Not long after it started, it overcomes 542 00:38:12,915 --> 00:38:16,075 Speaker 1: Mar and he's mad at me. And mind you, even 543 00:38:16,115 --> 00:38:19,195 Speaker 1: if his allegation that he is five feet eight is correct, 544 00:38:19,435 --> 00:38:21,595 Speaker 1: I'm just under six ' four. So he's giving up 545 00:38:21,595 --> 00:38:24,115 Speaker 1: a lot of height during an argument, and he starts 546 00:38:24,195 --> 00:38:26,035 Speaker 1: yapping about how I should stop saying I was a 547 00:38:26,035 --> 00:38:28,115 Speaker 1: way here of him at Cornell, and I'm just trying 548 00:38:28,115 --> 00:38:30,235 Speaker 1: to get publicity off something that never happened. And who 549 00:38:30,275 --> 00:38:33,675 Speaker 1: could remember that kind of crap anyway? And he never 550 00:38:33,715 --> 00:38:36,155 Speaker 1: talked to anybody in four years in college because quote 551 00:38:36,195 --> 00:38:38,555 Speaker 1: except for the Ethica High school students I sold drugs 552 00:38:38,595 --> 00:38:44,275 Speaker 1: to unquote. And I notice he's getting heated, and this 553 00:38:44,355 --> 00:38:48,395 Speaker 1: is just triggering that core belief of mine that I 554 00:38:48,555 --> 00:38:52,755 Speaker 1: was aware of him in college and I didn't like him, 555 00:38:52,915 --> 00:38:56,155 Speaker 1: and now it becomes clear to me he didn't like 556 00:38:56,275 --> 00:39:00,795 Speaker 1: me either. He's getting loud enough and he's swinging his 557 00:39:00,915 --> 00:39:03,595 Speaker 1: arms around now and it looks kind of funny, but 558 00:39:03,635 --> 00:39:06,555 Speaker 1: apparently it happens in the office sometimes. And this is 559 00:39:06,555 --> 00:39:09,915 Speaker 1: when Scott Carter, who was the executive producer whom I 560 00:39:09,955 --> 00:39:12,835 Speaker 1: definitely did know since like nineteen ninety two when he 561 00:39:12,875 --> 00:39:15,955 Speaker 1: worked at Comedy Central with my friend Alan Havy, Scott 562 00:39:15,995 --> 00:39:20,435 Speaker 1: Carter comes over to defuse the situation. Scott was a 563 00:39:20,435 --> 00:39:22,955 Speaker 1: three piece suit kind of guy with a thumbs tucking 564 00:39:23,115 --> 00:39:26,115 Speaker 1: the vest, who would call a group of men fellows 565 00:39:26,555 --> 00:39:30,675 Speaker 1: as in, say fellows. So Scott comes over and says, 566 00:39:31,035 --> 00:39:35,435 Speaker 1: say fellows with your Cornell alumni reunion here, And of 567 00:39:35,515 --> 00:39:38,395 Speaker 1: course this makes Bill Maher even angrier. Let me ask 568 00:39:38,435 --> 00:39:41,195 Speaker 1: you something. I used to drive down from Hobart to 569 00:39:41,275 --> 00:39:44,155 Speaker 1: see concerts at Cornell to say, I think Cornell was 570 00:39:44,195 --> 00:39:47,515 Speaker 1: the leading concert school in the nation back in our day. 571 00:39:48,635 --> 00:39:50,875 Speaker 1: And now Scott starts to list who he saw in 572 00:39:50,955 --> 00:39:54,475 Speaker 1: concert at Cornell. Robert Palmer and the famous Grateful Dead 573 00:39:54,595 --> 00:39:58,035 Speaker 1: concert at Cornell at Barton Hall. He was there, and 574 00:39:58,075 --> 00:40:00,715 Speaker 1: I say, I went to Springsteen, and mar mumbles something 575 00:40:00,755 --> 00:40:03,875 Speaker 1: about Loggins and Messina, and I know what Carter's doing here, 576 00:40:03,915 --> 00:40:06,715 Speaker 1: He's diffusing, And we do a couple of rounds of 577 00:40:06,955 --> 00:40:09,835 Speaker 1: who saw which Cornell concert? And finally I say, I 578 00:40:09,875 --> 00:40:14,115 Speaker 1: can top both of you comic geniuses. I saw Robert 579 00:40:14,235 --> 00:40:19,795 Speaker 1: Kleine in concert at Cornell. Now it is criminal, but 580 00:40:19,875 --> 00:40:22,835 Speaker 1: there's an excellent chance you may not know who Robert 581 00:40:22,875 --> 00:40:27,835 Speaker 1: Kline is, suffice to say as prominent a comedian in 582 00:40:27,875 --> 00:40:31,275 Speaker 1: the sixties, seventies eighties as George Carlin or Richard pryor. 583 00:40:31,755 --> 00:40:36,235 Speaker 1: HBO itself was built on annual George Carlin concerts and 584 00:40:36,395 --> 00:40:41,115 Speaker 1: annual Robert Klin concerts and everybody else. And Robert Kline 585 00:40:41,195 --> 00:40:44,155 Speaker 1: wasn't quite as deep or eternal as George Carlin, but 586 00:40:44,195 --> 00:40:47,915 Speaker 1: he was really on the money during Watergate and during Reagan. 587 00:40:48,035 --> 00:40:51,515 Speaker 1: So I say, I saw Robert Klein in concert at Cornell, 588 00:40:51,955 --> 00:40:55,515 Speaker 1: and Mar looks at me funny and not angrily, and 589 00:40:55,555 --> 00:41:00,715 Speaker 1: says quietly, I was at that too. I saw Robert 590 00:41:00,755 --> 00:41:04,315 Speaker 1: Klein too, And I don't really register that Mar's mood 591 00:41:04,315 --> 00:41:09,115 Speaker 1: has now utterly changed. He's not angry, he's confused. Well, 592 00:41:09,155 --> 00:41:11,315 Speaker 1: I say, I can still top you, because after that 593 00:41:11,435 --> 00:41:17,075 Speaker 1: concert I interviewed Robert Klein. Now Bill Maher starts to squint, 594 00:41:17,235 --> 00:41:19,715 Speaker 1: and he looks at me, and he looks at Scott Carter, 595 00:41:20,035 --> 00:41:22,635 Speaker 1: and he looks back at me, and he says, wait, 596 00:41:24,355 --> 00:41:30,155 Speaker 1: I interviewed Kleine after that concert, too. And I'm smiling 597 00:41:30,195 --> 00:41:32,395 Speaker 1: through all this and smiling and smiling and smiling, And 598 00:41:32,435 --> 00:41:36,115 Speaker 1: then suddenly, simultaneously it hits Bill Maher and me at 599 00:41:36,115 --> 00:41:38,395 Speaker 1: the same moment, in the same fullness of detail, and 600 00:41:38,435 --> 00:41:41,635 Speaker 1: I stop smiling, and I shout at Bill Maher, you 601 00:41:42,915 --> 00:41:45,515 Speaker 1: and he pulls his arms in towards his stomach and 602 00:41:45,635 --> 00:41:48,075 Speaker 1: kind of bends forward at the waist and covers his 603 00:41:48,155 --> 00:41:50,315 Speaker 1: face with his hands, and he says, oh God, I'm 604 00:41:50,355 --> 00:41:52,995 Speaker 1: so sorry, Jesus, it can't be. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, 605 00:41:54,275 --> 00:41:57,795 Speaker 1: And while the anger wells up inside me so powerfully, 606 00:41:57,835 --> 00:42:01,195 Speaker 1: I can almost see it in my own eyeballs. Bill 607 00:42:01,275 --> 00:42:06,355 Speaker 1: Maher's concert going producer Scott Carter is really confused. Used say, Fellows, 608 00:42:06,755 --> 00:42:09,195 Speaker 1: did I miss something or did I have a brief 609 00:42:09,355 --> 00:42:14,275 Speaker 1: stroke or episode? And I say, Bill, and I just 610 00:42:14,395 --> 00:42:17,915 Speaker 1: remember it how I happened to be aware of him 611 00:42:18,115 --> 00:42:22,035 Speaker 1: in school. And Mar still has got his hands over 612 00:42:22,075 --> 00:42:25,075 Speaker 1: his face, and people are looking at us, and Bill 613 00:42:25,155 --> 00:42:28,475 Speaker 1: is shouting apologies, and I say you want to tell him? 614 00:42:28,755 --> 00:42:31,995 Speaker 1: Or should I? And Mar just shakes his body no 615 00:42:32,155 --> 00:42:34,835 Speaker 1: and mumbles, oh God, you do it. I can't, I can't, 616 00:42:34,875 --> 00:42:38,115 Speaker 1: I can't. And it all came back to me. For 617 00:42:38,355 --> 00:42:42,035 Speaker 1: years I would tell people the story of the Robert 618 00:42:42,115 --> 00:42:46,635 Speaker 1: Klein concert at Cornell University in nineteen seventy eight. Our 619 00:42:46,755 --> 00:42:49,715 Speaker 1: radio station co sponsored his appearance along with the Cornell 620 00:42:49,835 --> 00:42:54,075 Speaker 1: Concert Commission, and in the contract we specified that a 621 00:42:54,115 --> 00:42:56,595 Speaker 1: couple of us real comedy nerds at the radio station 622 00:42:56,635 --> 00:42:59,555 Speaker 1: would get to go backstage afterwards and tape a brief 623 00:42:59,795 --> 00:43:03,355 Speaker 1: ten or fifteen minute interview with Robert Klein. Basically, we 624 00:43:03,435 --> 00:43:07,035 Speaker 1: paid him not but we paid him to do an interview. 625 00:43:08,035 --> 00:43:10,995 Speaker 1: And when my pal Andy Grossman and I get backstage 626 00:43:11,235 --> 00:43:13,035 Speaker 1: to talk to Robert Klein, and we have our two 627 00:43:13,075 --> 00:43:15,955 Speaker 1: microphones and two mike stands and three tape recorders, there 628 00:43:16,035 --> 00:43:20,915 Speaker 1: is this guy, this short guy, and he's yelling at 629 00:43:20,955 --> 00:43:23,795 Speaker 1: the chief of the Corneill Concert Commission, and he's yelling 630 00:43:23,875 --> 00:43:26,435 Speaker 1: at Robert Clein's manager, and he's demanding that he should 631 00:43:26,435 --> 00:43:28,875 Speaker 1: get to interview Robert Clin because, like Klein, this kid 632 00:43:28,915 --> 00:43:31,435 Speaker 1: says he is a stand up comedian and he publishes 633 00:43:31,475 --> 00:43:33,675 Speaker 1: the Corneill Humor Magazine. And he points at me and 634 00:43:33,715 --> 00:43:37,435 Speaker 1: he says he should get priority over these quote corporate 635 00:43:37,635 --> 00:43:44,755 Speaker 1: sellouts from the Cornell Radio station. I hated him on site. 636 00:43:47,195 --> 00:43:50,075 Speaker 1: Oh wait, I say to him in nineteen seventy eight. 637 00:43:50,115 --> 00:43:52,475 Speaker 1: And he's small and he's got dirty, stringy hair, and 638 00:43:52,515 --> 00:43:55,915 Speaker 1: he's loud, and I say, you are the publisher of 639 00:43:55,955 --> 00:43:59,835 Speaker 1: the Cornell Humor magazine, the Cornell Widow And he snorts 640 00:43:59,875 --> 00:44:03,075 Speaker 1: and says, I would get caught dead publishing that corporate sellout. 641 00:44:03,115 --> 00:44:06,995 Speaker 1: Cornell widow, and so I say, oh, so, then that 642 00:44:07,115 --> 00:44:10,155 Speaker 1: means you're the publisher of the Cornell alternative humor magazine, 643 00:44:10,195 --> 00:44:13,435 Speaker 1: the Not So Big Red or whatever it is they 644 00:44:13,435 --> 00:44:16,275 Speaker 1: call it. He says, no way, they are corporate sellouts. 645 00:44:16,315 --> 00:44:19,555 Speaker 1: I publish this, and he pulls out a stack of 646 00:44:19,635 --> 00:44:23,835 Speaker 1: mimeographed pages stapled together and there's like a drawing on 647 00:44:23,915 --> 00:44:27,635 Speaker 1: the front of a naked girl and handwritten it says 648 00:44:27,755 --> 00:44:32,555 Speaker 1: it's his comedy magazine. And I look at Robert Klein's 649 00:44:32,555 --> 00:44:36,595 Speaker 1: manager and I say, so, it's ten o'clock and if 650 00:44:36,635 --> 00:44:39,315 Speaker 1: you leave now while this idiot is screwing this up, 651 00:44:39,355 --> 00:44:42,635 Speaker 1: the limo can still get mister Klein to Elaine's in 652 00:44:42,715 --> 00:44:45,555 Speaker 1: the city before it closes, right, And the manager is 653 00:44:45,635 --> 00:44:49,635 Speaker 1: wildly impressed, you know of Elaine's. And I said yes, 654 00:44:50,475 --> 00:44:53,115 Speaker 1: and I felt like an adult. And I also said, 655 00:44:53,355 --> 00:44:55,475 Speaker 1: if we give this guy five minutes of our time 656 00:44:55,555 --> 00:44:57,555 Speaker 1: right now while we're setting up our tape recorders, can 657 00:44:57,595 --> 00:44:59,875 Speaker 1: we still have ten minutes with mister Klein? And the 658 00:44:59,915 --> 00:45:02,435 Speaker 1: manager says, good plan. I like the way you think, 659 00:45:02,715 --> 00:45:04,475 Speaker 1: and he points to the kid and gestures for him 660 00:45:04,515 --> 00:45:07,475 Speaker 1: to co I'm along now. The kid shouts, I want 661 00:45:07,515 --> 00:45:12,195 Speaker 1: half an hour. These corporate sellouts deserve nothing. And now 662 00:45:12,235 --> 00:45:16,835 Speaker 1: I'm getting angry. I say, buddy, so far all the 663 00:45:16,835 --> 00:45:21,395 Speaker 1: corporations in the world have paid me about one hundred bucks. 664 00:45:22,115 --> 00:45:24,715 Speaker 1: So I threaten him. Now, mind you, I believe this 665 00:45:24,755 --> 00:45:27,075 Speaker 1: is literally true. Since nineteen sixty seven, when I was 666 00:45:27,075 --> 00:45:31,115 Speaker 1: eight years old, I have started two fistfights, two in 667 00:45:31,195 --> 00:45:34,595 Speaker 1: fifty five years. I am a man of peace. I 668 00:45:34,675 --> 00:45:39,195 Speaker 1: am loud, but I am a man of peace. But 669 00:45:39,315 --> 00:45:44,515 Speaker 1: I say to this guy, you now have two choices. Kid, 670 00:45:45,035 --> 00:45:47,955 Speaker 1: five minutes with Robert Klein or I hit you in 671 00:45:48,035 --> 00:45:52,035 Speaker 1: the face. And he runs to where client's manager is 672 00:45:52,075 --> 00:45:55,995 Speaker 1: still gesturing towards him, and he screams corporate sellout, and 673 00:45:56,075 --> 00:45:58,675 Speaker 1: he disappears to do his interview, and behind him he 674 00:45:58,795 --> 00:46:03,795 Speaker 1: leaves his little homemade mimeograph ten or twelve page humor publication. 675 00:46:04,155 --> 00:46:06,795 Speaker 1: And I picked it up, and I read it and 676 00:46:07,355 --> 00:46:10,435 Speaker 1: register it and dismiss it before I leave the building. 677 00:46:11,275 --> 00:46:13,355 Speaker 1: And if I had only remembered what it said on 678 00:46:13,395 --> 00:46:15,915 Speaker 1: the cover, all the years of mystery and I was 679 00:46:15,955 --> 00:46:18,035 Speaker 1: aware of him, and all that would never have happened. 680 00:46:18,035 --> 00:46:22,835 Speaker 1: Because the cover of the magazine read Bill Mahr's comedy 681 00:46:22,955 --> 00:46:30,595 Speaker 1: Magazine by Bill Maher and now back in well technically 682 00:46:30,635 --> 00:46:33,355 Speaker 1: this is correct, back in real time at the party 683 00:46:33,395 --> 00:46:35,315 Speaker 1: in the Hollywood studio in two thousand and nine, the 684 00:46:35,355 --> 00:46:38,475 Speaker 1: producer Scott Carter says nothing, and Bill Maher is still 685 00:46:38,515 --> 00:46:43,075 Speaker 1: doubled over in shame, and I say, are you satisfied 686 00:46:43,395 --> 00:46:46,035 Speaker 1: that I was aware of you? And he mumbles yes. 687 00:46:46,955 --> 00:46:50,715 Speaker 1: And I say, will you ever question my memory again? 688 00:46:51,515 --> 00:46:54,995 Speaker 1: And he mumbles no. And he says if I need 689 00:46:55,035 --> 00:46:58,075 Speaker 1: him to do my show or a charity benefit or something, 690 00:46:58,155 --> 00:47:01,155 Speaker 1: just call. And he says he's ashamed, and he offers 691 00:47:01,195 --> 00:47:03,115 Speaker 1: me his hand to shake, and we shake, and finally 692 00:47:03,155 --> 00:47:05,595 Speaker 1: I say, and by the way, Bill Maher, I Bill 693 00:47:05,635 --> 00:47:10,075 Speaker 1: Maher's Comedy Magazine by Bill Maher? Are you a corporate sellout? 694 00:47:10,235 --> 00:47:15,835 Speaker 1: And he says kind, And that's how I was aware 695 00:47:15,995 --> 00:47:32,515 Speaker 1: of Bill Maher in college. I've done all the damage 696 00:47:32,555 --> 00:47:34,515 Speaker 1: I can do here. Thank you for listening. I mentioned 697 00:47:34,515 --> 00:47:37,755 Speaker 1: we've been nominated for Best Political Podcast and the iHeart 698 00:47:37,795 --> 00:47:41,315 Speaker 1: Podcast Awards. It'll be given out next month. I'm not 699 00:47:41,355 --> 00:47:44,075 Speaker 1: gonna win or anything, but you can vote. Just google 700 00:47:44,115 --> 00:47:46,035 Speaker 1: how to do it. I can't provide you a little link. 701 00:47:46,395 --> 00:47:50,195 Speaker 1: This is audio countdown. Musical directors Brian Ray and John 702 00:47:50,195 --> 00:47:53,195 Speaker 1: Phillip Shanelle arranged, produced, and performed most of our music. 703 00:47:53,515 --> 00:47:56,235 Speaker 1: Mister Ray was on guitarist, bass, and drums. Mister Shanelle 704 00:47:56,275 --> 00:48:00,555 Speaker 1: handled orchestration in keyboards. Ole mess was produced by Tko Brothers. 705 00:48:00,835 --> 00:48:03,755 Speaker 1: Other music, including some of the Beethoven compositions, arranged and 706 00:48:03,795 --> 00:48:07,155 Speaker 1: performed by no Hoarn's Allowed sports music is the Olberman 707 00:48:07,195 --> 00:48:10,635 Speaker 1: theme from ESPN two, written by Mitch Warren Davis courtesy 708 00:48:10,715 --> 00:48:14,355 Speaker 1: of ESPN Inc. Our satirical and pithy musical comments are 709 00:48:14,395 --> 00:48:17,675 Speaker 1: by Nancy Fauss. The best baseball stadium organist ever. Our 710 00:48:17,715 --> 00:48:20,715 Speaker 1: announcer today is my friend Kenny Mayne. Everything else was 711 00:48:20,755 --> 00:48:22,995 Speaker 1: pretty much my fault. That's countdown for this the two 712 00:48:23,035 --> 00:48:26,355 Speaker 1: hundred and sixty seventh day until the twenty twenty four 713 00:48:26,475 --> 00:48:31,835 Speaker 1: US presidential election. Thirty second day since dementia J. Trump's 714 00:48:31,915 --> 00:48:34,555 Speaker 1: first attempted coup against the democratically elected government of the 715 00:48:34,635 --> 00:48:38,195 Speaker 1: United States. Use the Fourteenth Amendment, the Insurrection Act, the 716 00:48:38,355 --> 00:48:42,355 Speaker 1: justice system, the mental health system, and your nearest neighborhood 717 00:48:42,355 --> 00:48:45,595 Speaker 1: war games to stop him from doing it again while 718 00:48:45,635 --> 00:48:50,995 Speaker 1: we still can. The next scheduled Countdown is tomorrow, although 719 00:48:50,995 --> 00:48:54,115 Speaker 1: I wouldn't bet on it. I'm sick as anything hoping 720 00:48:54,155 --> 00:48:56,635 Speaker 1: you did not hear that till now, because, as I 721 00:48:56,675 --> 00:49:00,115 Speaker 1: once heard the great Geddy Lee say, I'm a professionally 722 00:49:01,355 --> 00:49:04,395 Speaker 1: boltons as the news warrants, or whenever my voice comes 723 00:49:04,435 --> 00:49:07,275 Speaker 1: back till then, I'm Keith Oldremman. Good morning, good afternoon, goodnight, 724 00:49:08,155 --> 00:49:25,915 Speaker 1: and good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production 725 00:49:26,115 --> 00:49:31,435 Speaker 1: of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, 726 00:49:31,515 --> 00:49:35,115 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.