1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:02,800 Speaker 1: We got him into an inpatient facility. And keep in mind, 2 00:00:02,840 --> 00:00:06,040 Speaker 1: at this point of you was sixties six, sixties seven, 3 00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:11,399 Speaker 1: and we're not talking like weekend drinking. We're talking hard 4 00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:15,520 Speaker 1: drinking for forty years. We sent him to this place 5 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:19,639 Speaker 1: in States Poor Georgia. I was not optimistic they do 6 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 1: my camy therapy, so I'd slide out on the States 7 00:00:23,000 --> 00:00:26,000 Speaker 1: Poor Georgia one day after the show. And as soon 8 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:27,880 Speaker 1: as I saw him, as soon as we hugged, I 9 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:31,040 Speaker 1: knew that he was different. And he hadn't he hadn't 10 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:34,040 Speaker 1: had a drink sense. What a beautiful way to describe 11 00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:39,199 Speaker 1: a relationship with one's parent. Um, redemption, love, all the things. 12 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:43,240 Speaker 1: Craig Melvin, anchor of today's show, wrote this beautiful book, 13 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:45,400 Speaker 1: and I hope you guys enjoy it. Sit back, relaxed. 14 00:00:45,440 --> 00:01:01,400 Speaker 1: He is our guest on Naked this week. Every champion 15 00:01:01,480 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 1: and carry Champion is to be a champion of Champion 16 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:07,399 Speaker 1: and carry Champion and carry chapion the Champion and carry 17 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:11,120 Speaker 1: Champion and carry Champion RAI raiders and sports and entertaining connectd. 18 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:14,600 Speaker 1: We're gonna in the world with vulnerable considered. We come 19 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 1: and remove the vail from entertainment elite. It's the difference 20 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:19,959 Speaker 1: between with it's real and with the public seas. So 21 00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 1: here's your favorite celebrities behind the scenes. It's refreshing up 22 00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:26,480 Speaker 1: then the whole story specific life, all to rendevents to 23 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 1: shape the person that you here. We gotta champion. They 24 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 1: carry champion, They girl, you did it. It's the greatest 25 00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:34,640 Speaker 1: in sports and entertainment connected with every champion. They carry 26 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,840 Speaker 1: champions to be a champion, the champion, they carry Champion. 27 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:40,720 Speaker 1: They girl, Chitty yout the champion, they carry champion and 28 00:01:40,840 --> 00:01:44,360 Speaker 1: carry Champion. Raider Freider and sports and entertaining can Naked 29 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:47,840 Speaker 1: were here? Everybody, Welcome back to Naked. We're on a 30 00:01:48,120 --> 00:01:51,280 Speaker 1: roll with our guests. This week we have today's show 31 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: anchor Craig Melvin. I really enjoyed. I really enjoyed talking 32 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 1: to him. I get into this in the podcast, but 33 00:01:57,160 --> 00:01:59,160 Speaker 1: I met Craig when we were up and coming reporters 34 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,640 Speaker 1: at local news, and it's just wonderful to see where 35 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:04,680 Speaker 1: he is right now and how he has decided to 36 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 1: contentionally take a path that allows him to speak to 37 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,760 Speaker 1: the world every morning and to your great stories and 38 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:12,959 Speaker 1: be open about his life and his family and I 39 00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:15,720 Speaker 1: think it's a beautiful, beautiful thing. I asked him some 40 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,960 Speaker 1: tough questions about being a journalist, a black journalist, more 41 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:23,280 Speaker 1: specifically a black man in today's news world when everything 42 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,560 Speaker 1: seems so polarizing, when you get in these positions of 43 00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 1: power and they make you feel like you can't be 44 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:32,040 Speaker 1: yourself fully or you can't bring your full self to 45 00:02:32,080 --> 00:02:34,720 Speaker 1: work and talk about your experiences. And I do believe 46 00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:37,639 Speaker 1: George Floyd changed that for a lot of people such 47 00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:40,639 Speaker 1: as myself, who have these platforms where you're afraid to 48 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:43,320 Speaker 1: be very open and honest. For me, it kep me 49 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,760 Speaker 1: all the way into the direction of speaking truth to 50 00:02:45,880 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 1: power and for others. You use your big platform for 51 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 1: good so people can see you and understand how you 52 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:56,240 Speaker 1: move and who you are. So Craig Melvin again third 53 00:02:56,240 --> 00:02:58,079 Speaker 1: hour of the Today Show host but I see him 54 00:02:58,080 --> 00:03:01,000 Speaker 1: all the time without Broker. He's on everything journalists to 55 00:03:01,040 --> 00:03:03,959 Speaker 1: the core, A friend of a more importantly a husband 56 00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:07,920 Speaker 1: and a father. His book really gets into tough dynamics 57 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:11,680 Speaker 1: between parent child, father son, mother daughter, if you will 58 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:15,640 Speaker 1: insert whatever family dynamic you want. And it was special 59 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:19,200 Speaker 1: because he talked about an addicted father who didn't go 60 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:22,080 Speaker 1: to rehab until he was sixty seven years old, and 61 00:03:22,120 --> 00:03:24,120 Speaker 1: it's living his life the best life he can live 62 00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:27,160 Speaker 1: right now, and that's hope for all of us. Right, 63 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:30,960 Speaker 1: without further ado, let's welcome in Craig Melvin to Naked 64 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 1: Chepi and everybody listening to the podcast. Thank you so 65 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:39,880 Speaker 1: much for being faithful. I have to tell you a 66 00:03:39,920 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 1: story about Craig. Craig and I. This is bananas, but 67 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:48,560 Speaker 1: it's how the world works. I remember Craig and I 68 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:52,040 Speaker 1: went to something called the Pointer Institute together. I was 69 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:55,680 Speaker 1: a local news reporter in anchor in West Palm And 70 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:58,360 Speaker 1: I don't remember you might have. Were you in North Carolina? 71 00:03:58,400 --> 00:04:03,280 Speaker 1: Where were you South Carolina? You used the proper formal name. 72 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:07,440 Speaker 1: I just I called it anchor and reporter camp. Yeah, 73 00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:10,800 Speaker 1: it's essentially what it was, right people and back. And 74 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:12,680 Speaker 1: I don't even know if it's even regarded like it 75 00:04:12,760 --> 00:04:14,560 Speaker 1: used to be back, you know, since we're out of 76 00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:17,520 Speaker 1: local news. It probably is. But that we met there 77 00:04:17,520 --> 00:04:20,799 Speaker 1: in a class full of people, um and and and 78 00:04:21,400 --> 00:04:24,599 Speaker 1: what I remember thinking about Craig was goss. He's so professional. 79 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:28,560 Speaker 1: This is the perfect news man. That's what I remember thinking. 80 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:32,200 Speaker 1: I also remember thinking God, he is so arrogant, you know, 81 00:04:32,279 --> 00:04:44,400 Speaker 1: my nerves or everything. Uh, wow, this one was wrong. Uh, 82 00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:48,000 Speaker 1: the first was correct. Talk to me, Um about your 83 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:51,320 Speaker 1: local news journey. That's interesting though, and in terms of 84 00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:54,440 Speaker 1: how you've been able to move up the ladder, you know. 85 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 1: So I started in comedy South Carolina. And when we 86 00:04:57,160 --> 00:04:59,200 Speaker 1: met at Anchor Camp that's where I was working, and 87 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:04,280 Speaker 1: my news director at the time. Um, we're still friends 88 00:05:04,320 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 1: and and and she said to me, Now she admits 89 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:09,960 Speaker 1: that she thought I was decent, but that I could 90 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,119 Speaker 1: be much better. So she sent me off the camp 91 00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:16,040 Speaker 1: to to improve. UM and I. But I grew up. 92 00:05:16,040 --> 00:05:17,320 Speaker 1: And so I grew up in Columbia. I want to 93 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:21,400 Speaker 1: called the high school and M and I started working 94 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,640 Speaker 1: on this TV station, w y S TV when I 95 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,800 Speaker 1: was a junior in high school. And I would go 96 00:05:27,880 --> 00:05:31,080 Speaker 1: in and do these stories. I like, I worked where 97 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:33,480 Speaker 1: the producer and did stories and my teens and seatbelt 98 00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:36,640 Speaker 1: safety and teens and smoking and teens and sex and 99 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:39,840 Speaker 1: like stories that try to appeal with teenagers. And they 100 00:05:39,839 --> 00:05:43,279 Speaker 1: paid me twenty five dollars of stories. And I caught 101 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:45,520 Speaker 1: the bug. I just I caught the bug in high 102 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 1: school and went off to college in South Carolina and 103 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 1: steady government because I thought, for a hot minute, well 104 00:05:51,240 --> 00:05:53,479 Speaker 1: maybe I could be a lawyer, or maybe I could 105 00:05:54,040 --> 00:05:58,520 Speaker 1: do something in d C. And I tried to escape 106 00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:01,440 Speaker 1: my fate, oh, only to have it chased me down. 107 00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: Junior year college and I went back to the same 108 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 1: TV station in Columbia, South Carolina, w I S t 109 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:11,360 Speaker 1: V and U and I worked there that summer as 110 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:14,680 Speaker 1: a producer. And that was it. That that that that 111 00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:17,920 Speaker 1: started for me. That was two thousand. That was two 112 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:20,640 Speaker 1: thousand when I was Yeah, and that's when I started, 113 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,680 Speaker 1: and I've been doing it during it ever since. Carrige Champion, 114 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,039 Speaker 1: just like you, I haven't see when I when I 115 00:06:26,120 --> 00:06:29,120 Speaker 1: met you, you were at the station in West Paul, 116 00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 1: but you I think shortly thereafter you went to the 117 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:34,320 Speaker 1: Tennis channel. No, No, after I left West Palm, I 118 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:38,480 Speaker 1: went to Atlanta. I remember I got fired and rehired 119 00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:41,039 Speaker 1: for Sam Mother Suka on the air. You remember that 120 00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:43,560 Speaker 1: that fact when that was back when something like that 121 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:45,920 Speaker 1: would get you fired. Yeah, another year, could you imagine 122 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:48,440 Speaker 1: like I was? And I remember and then the internet. 123 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:51,080 Speaker 1: You know, it sounds like eighteen umteen years ago, but 124 00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 1: I remember they I'll never live this down. My life 125 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:55,839 Speaker 1: is over. And it was so funny, but no, you 126 00:06:56,120 --> 00:06:58,320 Speaker 1: it was. It was a great class full of people. 127 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:02,520 Speaker 1: I remember that I love local news much like you, 128 00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:04,320 Speaker 1: but I also thought I was gonna be an attorney. 129 00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,400 Speaker 1: But you can't escape it when it's in you, right, 130 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:08,960 Speaker 1: If it's in you, you just can't escape it. And 131 00:07:09,160 --> 00:07:12,640 Speaker 1: what a beautiful career you have had for those who 132 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,080 Speaker 1: don't know like local news is when you turn on 133 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:17,520 Speaker 1: your local news and you see your fake Mr John 134 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,720 Speaker 1: or whoever is your favorite person. And I remember my 135 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,480 Speaker 1: biggest dream was to be a local news reporter here 136 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:26,080 Speaker 1: in l A. But life had different, obviously circumstances for me. 137 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:30,360 Speaker 1: Did you realize that you would be? I mean, once 138 00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:32,720 Speaker 1: you have this bug, what was the gig, because there's 139 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:35,560 Speaker 1: always a gig, the gig to get I wanted to 140 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:38,120 Speaker 1: be Barbara Watsons, that was the gig, you know. I 141 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:41,200 Speaker 1: wanted to be Diane Sawyer. The gig? What was the 142 00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:43,560 Speaker 1: gig for you? As you're coming up through the ranks. 143 00:07:43,760 --> 00:07:49,040 Speaker 1: If we're if we're, if we're being honest and naked, Um, 144 00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:51,960 Speaker 1: it's it's this gig. This is uh, how I was 145 00:07:51,960 --> 00:07:55,200 Speaker 1: gonna say, I would say, you've got the gig. It's 146 00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:59,200 Speaker 1: what I think, you know, for me, I dreamed of 147 00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:03,680 Speaker 1: doing the And you know, you have dreams, and I 148 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 1: think from time to time you kind of you put 149 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:08,120 Speaker 1: them to the side. You're like, this isn't gonna happen. 150 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:11,800 Speaker 1: I can be happy doing this. I can be happy here. 151 00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:13,240 Speaker 1: I went to d C for a few years. I 152 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:16,280 Speaker 1: could be happy working in DC forever. And and so 153 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:19,520 Speaker 1: sometimes you sort of forget your dream. Um, but I 154 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 1: never forgot it. I it's this is I told people 155 00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:27,640 Speaker 1: along the time. You know, I am blessed beyond nature, 156 00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:31,120 Speaker 1: and it's not lost on me yet because I get 157 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:35,760 Speaker 1: to do what as a sixteen seventeen year old boy 158 00:08:36,160 --> 00:08:40,040 Speaker 1: watching the Today's Show in Columbia, South Carolina. I get 159 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:44,679 Speaker 1: to do what I dreamed of doing as a teenager. 160 00:08:44,720 --> 00:08:46,960 Speaker 1: And that, granted, you know, it took it took a 161 00:08:47,000 --> 00:08:49,880 Speaker 1: long time. It didn't, you know, I think, But I 162 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:51,920 Speaker 1: don't think it took that long. I know for you, 163 00:08:52,160 --> 00:08:54,120 Speaker 1: we're looking at it like it took a long time, 164 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:55,440 Speaker 1: and out of me to cut you off. But I 165 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:59,000 Speaker 1: also know for everybody who is listening, you could dream 166 00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:01,560 Speaker 1: that dream. You can even at the job, but very 167 00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:06,320 Speaker 1: few people are tailored to thrive in that environment. Meaning 168 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:09,040 Speaker 1: a morning show is a grind on your family and friends. 169 00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:12,320 Speaker 1: But it's also a grind because it's you know, very competitive. 170 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 1: You're competing with other morning shows. We won't mention any 171 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:16,480 Speaker 1: of those who were talking about it right now, but 172 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:19,960 Speaker 1: people have to be built to stay in the position 173 00:09:20,000 --> 00:09:23,160 Speaker 1: in which you are. Our worker is built a different way. 174 00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:27,160 Speaker 1: He's a he's a human, roker is and he is 175 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:30,120 Speaker 1: a robot. And at one point in time it was 176 00:09:30,200 --> 00:09:33,360 Speaker 1: Katie Kuric and then you know, you know those we 177 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:37,480 Speaker 1: shall not mention. There's always, um, someone who is built 178 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,040 Speaker 1: for it. You could have the dream, you could taste 179 00:09:40,040 --> 00:09:42,360 Speaker 1: the dream, but you're like living the dream because you're 180 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:44,920 Speaker 1: built for it. Don't you think, Well, I think you're 181 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:48,040 Speaker 1: very kind, you're very kind, you know, I don't. I 182 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 1: don't think I'm I don't think. Maybe I am now 183 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:53,080 Speaker 1: to a certain extent, but I wasn't when I started. 184 00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:56,000 Speaker 1: First of all, I'm glad you puted this out. The 185 00:09:56,160 --> 00:10:00,400 Speaker 1: grind on your family after you smoke kids. Um, the 186 00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:04,400 Speaker 1: crime is it's hard. It's also one of those jobs. 187 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:07,400 Speaker 1: There's not a lot of people who do it or 188 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,480 Speaker 1: who have done it, So there's not like there's not 189 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:12,800 Speaker 1: a manual, and there's not a lot of people that 190 00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:15,480 Speaker 1: you can really ask like what it's like, because then 191 00:10:15,480 --> 00:10:17,920 Speaker 1: they think you're coming for their job. So you kind 192 00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:20,920 Speaker 1: of you learn as you go. And there's so much 193 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 1: about the job that I didn't know that I've had 194 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:27,760 Speaker 1: to learn. But the shift is it's absolutely brutal. And 195 00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:32,160 Speaker 1: I don't think a lot of folks understand, like it's 196 00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:33,760 Speaker 1: you know, they see, oh, you know, you know on 197 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 1: TV three hours in the morning, it looks like you're 198 00:10:36,360 --> 00:10:39,040 Speaker 1: having fun, you're smiling, you're eating, you're interviewing with celebrities 199 00:10:39,160 --> 00:10:44,679 Speaker 1: or politicians whoever. And that's that's that's not the job. 200 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:47,080 Speaker 1: I mean, that's that's the easiest part of the job. 201 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:49,640 Speaker 1: You know. The hard part of the job is doing 202 00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:53,000 Speaker 1: the show and then hopping out a plane and then 203 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,360 Speaker 1: you know, flying to l a or flying to tomorrow's 204 00:10:56,360 --> 00:10:59,640 Speaker 1: buffalo and you come back after being on the ground 205 00:10:59,679 --> 00:11:02,480 Speaker 1: for a few hours and you get back up and 206 00:11:02,520 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: you do the show again. Because part of the and 207 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:08,360 Speaker 1: they told they told me this early on of doing 208 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,079 Speaker 1: the show is being there, like you you have to 209 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,720 Speaker 1: be on the show so if you're not on the show, 210 00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:17,520 Speaker 1: then you're either on vacation or something huge has happened. 211 00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:21,600 Speaker 1: So there shooting the stories between the show. It's a grime. 212 00:11:21,840 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 1: And I missed and I missed a lot, you know, 213 00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:26,680 Speaker 1: I miss you know, I missed sporting events that my 214 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:29,760 Speaker 1: kids have, or I missed the ballet recitals or and 215 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:33,160 Speaker 1: that that really used to bother me a lot. In 216 00:11:33,240 --> 00:11:35,680 Speaker 1: carson Dale and I had this conversation several years ago, 217 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:41,040 Speaker 1: and he he actually changed my perspective on it. He said, credible. Um, 218 00:11:41,080 --> 00:11:43,760 Speaker 1: if you really think about it, everyone as a parent, 219 00:11:43,840 --> 00:11:50,040 Speaker 1: everyone is sacrificing something. Most are sacrificing money. Um. Some 220 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: sacrifice time, and some sacrifice other things. But everyone's making 221 00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:57,120 Speaker 1: a sacrifice. You have to make peace with your sacrifice. 222 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:00,240 Speaker 1: And so I've made peace for the fact that you know, 223 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,959 Speaker 1: I'm not going to be at every event of my 224 00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:07,880 Speaker 1: children have because I can't. Um. But we take fantastic 225 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:12,839 Speaker 1: vacations and when I am with them, I'm present. I 226 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:17,080 Speaker 1: try to keep this terrible thing out of sight, my 227 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:20,679 Speaker 1: my my smartphone. Um So, but I've made peace with 228 00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:26,000 Speaker 1: the sacrifice. That makes sense. Well, everyone who has some 229 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:30,880 Speaker 1: sort of passion or some sort of um love. Uh, 230 00:12:30,920 --> 00:12:33,120 Speaker 1: they know that they're sacrifice that comes with that, and 231 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 1: so relationships with workships, everything like it makes perfect sense. 232 00:12:37,400 --> 00:12:40,160 Speaker 1: And since you led me there, um, and you're talking 233 00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:44,600 Speaker 1: about being a dad, you have this book out that 234 00:12:44,880 --> 00:12:48,040 Speaker 1: is about your father and becoming a father and learning 235 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,800 Speaker 1: to be a father as you are, Pops. Let's talk 236 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:55,080 Speaker 1: about it for a second, because although it's father and son, 237 00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:58,920 Speaker 1: I think it could be father and daughter absolutely, you know, 238 00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:04,400 Speaker 1: because I felt a kindred spirit in a connection with 239 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,840 Speaker 1: you and your father's story. I'm not unfamiliar to my 240 00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 1: father's story. So tell everyone what the book is about. 241 00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,640 Speaker 1: So the book is about it's about it's about several 242 00:13:15,640 --> 00:13:20,360 Speaker 1: different things. It's about, um, the complicated relationship that most 243 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:23,920 Speaker 1: sons have with their fathers. It's about growing up in 244 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:28,280 Speaker 1: South Carolina. It's about addiction, it's about battling your demons. 245 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:34,040 Speaker 1: But it's also ultimately about resilience and love. And uh, 246 00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:36,120 Speaker 1: you know, my dad was And it's funny because I 247 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:39,560 Speaker 1: just saw him two days ago. He was up here 248 00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:44,360 Speaker 1: for this cherry golf tournament we did. And and even 249 00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:47,120 Speaker 1: now my dad's you know, north to seven years old, 250 00:13:47,520 --> 00:13:49,600 Speaker 1: he tells me. Now, all the time, every time we talk. 251 00:13:49,640 --> 00:13:51,079 Speaker 1: I love you, I love you, I'm proud of you. 252 00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:53,080 Speaker 1: I love you, I'm proud of you. But for the 253 00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:57,200 Speaker 1: first you know, twenty one twenty two years of my life, 254 00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,280 Speaker 1: those those were not um words that are heard a 255 00:14:00,280 --> 00:14:03,120 Speaker 1: lot from my dad. And so as I got older, 256 00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:10,480 Speaker 1: it started to develop this resentment towards my dad. Um. 257 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:17,040 Speaker 1: He was a recreational, casual drinker who over time became 258 00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:21,040 Speaker 1: more than that. He drank a lot, you know, every 259 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:24,520 Speaker 1: day blackout, you know. And and so as I get 260 00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 1: older and I started to achieve, you know, some reasonable 261 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:33,760 Speaker 1: modicum of professional success, I started to resent I started 262 00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:37,760 Speaker 1: it resented him. But I think more than just the 263 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:43,000 Speaker 1: resentment of my dad, it was this resentment towards his 264 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:46,800 Speaker 1: his inability to get this monkey office back. I did 265 00:14:46,800 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: not have an enlightened view of addiction. I just saw 266 00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:54,040 Speaker 1: it as as most people didn't probably still do to 267 00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:56,680 Speaker 1: a certain extent. It was a weakness, was a weaknessaid 268 00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:59,920 Speaker 1: he couldn't control. And so this went on for ye 269 00:15:00,080 --> 00:15:03,840 Speaker 1: years and we were essentially estranged for a number of years. 270 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 1: Um Then he got into a fender bender. But we 271 00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:11,200 Speaker 1: got into Carson about five years ago. He's driving dropped. UM. 272 00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:13,800 Speaker 1: He had retired from the post office after about forty years. 273 00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:16,960 Speaker 1: He had no hobbies or interests, very few friends, in 274 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 1: part because he also worked the third shift, not just 275 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:23,400 Speaker 1: the drinking. And he got into this fender bender. And 276 00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:25,520 Speaker 1: I was I was working at the Today Show at 277 00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:28,680 Speaker 1: the time, and and I had come I had started 278 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,840 Speaker 1: to do a number of I had done some stories 279 00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:35,320 Speaker 1: on addiction, and the way that I viewed addiction it 280 00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:39,960 Speaker 1: had changed. I knew what it was and and you know, 281 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,760 Speaker 1: as Oprah used to say, when we know better, we 282 00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:46,280 Speaker 1: do better. And so I saw it as an opportunity 283 00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:49,200 Speaker 1: and and we we rallied the family. We staged a 284 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:53,560 Speaker 1: professional intervention, and we got him into an impatient facility. 285 00:15:53,640 --> 00:15:55,480 Speaker 1: And keep in mind, at this point, my dad is 286 00:15:56,800 --> 00:16:00,920 Speaker 1: at that point, he was sixties six, sixties seven, and 287 00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:05,400 Speaker 1: and we're not talking like weekend drinking. We're talking hard 288 00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:11,040 Speaker 1: drinking for forty years. And we sent him to this 289 00:16:11,080 --> 00:16:15,080 Speaker 1: place in States Porer, Georgia. I was not optimistic that 290 00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:16,960 Speaker 1: it was going to work. And then I go down 291 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:20,320 Speaker 1: there at part of the program is UM you have 292 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:24,440 Speaker 1: to visit with with with your your your your children, 293 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,520 Speaker 1: and your spouse, while you're in the program, they come 294 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 1: and see you in this new environment and you talk 295 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:32,440 Speaker 1: and you air grievances that you've been holding on too 296 00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:37,040 Speaker 1: for like years. They do like cany therapy. So I 297 00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:39,400 Speaker 1: slid out on the states Porer, Georgia one day after 298 00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:42,000 Speaker 1: the show. And as soon as I saw him, as 299 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,160 Speaker 1: soon as we hugged, I knew, um, I knew that 300 00:16:45,200 --> 00:16:48,160 Speaker 1: he was different. And he hadn't he hadn't had a 301 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,960 Speaker 1: drink since. And not only not only has he not 302 00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:56,000 Speaker 1: had a drink, Carrie, he gave up cigarettes during COVID. 303 00:16:56,040 --> 00:16:58,800 Speaker 1: The doctor told him that if he had another cigarette 304 00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:02,200 Speaker 1: he might die. So the quit cigarettes, cold turkey, that'll 305 00:17:02,240 --> 00:17:04,840 Speaker 1: do it for you. Well yeah, and not he but 306 00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:08,720 Speaker 1: he has he has relationships now with his children and 307 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:13,320 Speaker 1: his grandchildren that he was totally incapable of having just 308 00:17:13,440 --> 00:17:16,160 Speaker 1: five years ago. And so the book is about that. 309 00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:19,399 Speaker 1: The book is about redemption. It's it's just but but 310 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:22,680 Speaker 1: I also, for me, it was cathartic. You know. I 311 00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 1: got to interview my dad for hours and asked him 312 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:30,600 Speaker 1: all the questions that I wanted to and we you know, 313 00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:33,679 Speaker 1: we have these recordings and and it was just the 314 00:17:33,680 --> 00:17:37,080 Speaker 1: first line in the book is and my father was 315 00:17:37,119 --> 00:17:39,920 Speaker 1: born in a prison in West Virginia and we never 316 00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:42,800 Speaker 1: talked about it until I sat down to write this book. 317 00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:46,560 Speaker 1: And that's true, Like we never I sent first line. 318 00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:48,760 Speaker 1: I was like, whoa, and if we've never talked about 319 00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:51,920 Speaker 1: it in prison? What was going on? That was? That 320 00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:55,240 Speaker 1: was very very naked of you. What I'm also hearing, though, 321 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,960 Speaker 1: Craig is, as you wrote this book, it helps you 322 00:17:58,040 --> 00:18:03,919 Speaker 1: heal and forgive and lies that the compassion is is 323 00:18:03,960 --> 00:18:08,719 Speaker 1: important and empathy is important because when you resent your parents, 324 00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:12,600 Speaker 1: it's hard to let that go because there are things 325 00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:14,960 Speaker 1: we think they owe us that they didn't give us 326 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:17,080 Speaker 1: that we are trying to figure out as adults because 327 00:18:17,080 --> 00:18:20,000 Speaker 1: we didn't get it when we were children. Um, I 328 00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,760 Speaker 1: had the same resentment for my family and my parents, 329 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:26,080 Speaker 1: both my parents actually, But once I started to forgive them, 330 00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:29,960 Speaker 1: you start to understand more, you know. And I want 331 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:33,399 Speaker 1: to know now that you have this different perspective and 332 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,760 Speaker 1: you are now, Um, you have a better relationship clearly 333 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:42,080 Speaker 1: with your father. How do you see his good traits 334 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 1: and his bad traits displayed in you as a dad? Oh? Oh, 335 00:18:46,080 --> 00:18:48,879 Speaker 1: you're good at this scarage Champion I've done an interview 336 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:55,760 Speaker 1: one time just before this. Let's start with the bad, 337 00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:58,760 Speaker 1: then we'll go to the good. Okay, baby, you think 338 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: bad treats, you know you and you allude to this earlier. 339 00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:05,399 Speaker 1: My dad were third shift. He or a third shift 340 00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:09,720 Speaker 1: for all, but I think three years of his career 341 00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:11,440 Speaker 1: as a mail clerk at the post office, and that's 342 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:14,200 Speaker 1: thirty six years and and that that's a brutal shift. 343 00:19:14,680 --> 00:19:16,960 Speaker 1: I didn't find out until I sat down to write 344 00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:20,160 Speaker 1: this book. He worked the third shift because you made 345 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:23,359 Speaker 1: a few extra books. And so he he didn't go 346 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:25,240 Speaker 1: to college. He was the youngest in the family that 347 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:27,119 Speaker 1: wentn't any money left for him to go to college, 348 00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:30,199 Speaker 1: went to the military, and took this job at the 349 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:32,760 Speaker 1: post office as a mail clerk. And I'm not telling 350 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:34,360 Speaker 1: you anything. He wouldn't tell you if you were talking 351 00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:36,400 Speaker 1: to him. It was a miserable it's a miserable job. 352 00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:39,800 Speaker 1: He didn't enjoy it. Um he liked the people. But 353 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:44,240 Speaker 1: it was important to him even as a as a 354 00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:47,199 Speaker 1: as a self described drum it was important for his 355 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 1: kids to go to college and for his kids to 356 00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:53,040 Speaker 1: be successful. It didn't happen for him in the way 357 00:19:53,080 --> 00:19:55,960 Speaker 1: that he wanted, so he worked that third shift to 358 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:58,280 Speaker 1: make some extra money to give us since to college 359 00:19:58,800 --> 00:20:02,120 Speaker 1: holidays week, and he picked up all the extra shifts 360 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:05,439 Speaker 1: for money. And I remember when I started my career 361 00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:09,520 Speaker 1: early on in Columbia, South Carolina, I worked twelve hours, 362 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:13,439 Speaker 1: fourteen hours, sixteen hours. I did not say no. I 363 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:17,840 Speaker 1: worked up six days a week for for a long time. 364 00:20:18,280 --> 00:20:22,639 Speaker 1: And I did it at the expense of relationships. I 365 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,320 Speaker 1: did it at the expense of at first my physical 366 00:20:25,359 --> 00:20:27,600 Speaker 1: health and then to to a lesser extent, I think 367 00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:30,240 Speaker 1: probably my mental health. Although we didn't talk about that 368 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:33,840 Speaker 1: back then. Um and I remember, and I remember I 369 00:20:33,840 --> 00:20:36,000 Speaker 1: would I would say that some of my close close 370 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:38,880 Speaker 1: friends at the time, maybe you went to a better college, 371 00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:41,919 Speaker 1: maybe you came from a better family, and maybe you 372 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:44,960 Speaker 1: were smarter, better looking, you weren't going to outwork me, 373 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:49,159 Speaker 1: that you wouldn't out worked me. And and I lived it, 374 00:20:49,800 --> 00:20:51,679 Speaker 1: and I picked that up for my dad, and I 375 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,840 Speaker 1: used to wear that as a badge of honor. And 376 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:58,119 Speaker 1: as I get older, I realized that that probably that 377 00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:01,080 Speaker 1: probably wasn't the best approach. The probably should have been 378 00:21:01,119 --> 00:21:03,960 Speaker 1: a happy medium or happy your medium. That was a 379 00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,960 Speaker 1: bad treat me, and I'll tell you something else I 380 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:09,040 Speaker 1: And I've talked to my therapist about this as well. 381 00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:11,199 Speaker 1: You know, I went through a phase in in my 382 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:13,320 Speaker 1: twenties where I was out in Vegas, like every few 383 00:21:13,320 --> 00:21:16,639 Speaker 1: months at a blackjack table or I had a bookie. 384 00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:20,440 Speaker 1: I would bet on games, and um, I know, for 385 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:22,520 Speaker 1: a while, I was drinking more than I wanted to. 386 00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:26,720 Speaker 1: And then I realized, Um, I haven't addictive personality. That 387 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:30,479 Speaker 1: that's and that's genetic um and and so that was 388 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:32,919 Speaker 1: something else that I had to wrestle with. That was 389 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:38,000 Speaker 1: something that I inherited, uh from my father. Those are 390 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:42,480 Speaker 1: the bad traits, those are the the good traits my 391 00:21:42,640 --> 00:21:46,720 Speaker 1: dad and it's it's and people who don't know you 392 00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:48,960 Speaker 1: just met him for the first time, it takes it 393 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:54,080 Speaker 1: takes a few minutes to adjust to him. He has 394 00:21:53,800 --> 00:22:00,000 Speaker 1: a sense of humor that is dark and twisted. Um, 395 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:03,040 Speaker 1: but he's he's one of the funniest people that you'll 396 00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 1: ever meet. I'm not that funny, but I'd like to 397 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:10,000 Speaker 1: think that I have the ability to find humor in 398 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:12,880 Speaker 1: awkward situations. And I picked it up for my dad. 399 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:15,640 Speaker 1: I picked it up for my dad. And another trait 400 00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:21,080 Speaker 1: that I've I've always enjoyed and granted. When I was younger, 401 00:22:21,640 --> 00:22:24,120 Speaker 1: I probably didn't appreciate as much as I do now. 402 00:22:25,359 --> 00:22:29,240 Speaker 1: My dad is is one of these people in the family, 403 00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:34,399 Speaker 1: maybe the only person. Sometimes he doesn't get involved in 404 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:38,840 Speaker 1: a lot of drama. He's not He's aware of things 405 00:22:38,840 --> 00:22:42,159 Speaker 1: that are happening. He doesn't get bogged down in a 406 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:46,159 Speaker 1: lot of the drama that consumes families. And for a 407 00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:49,600 Speaker 1: long time I thought it was because he was indifferent, apathetic. 408 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:54,120 Speaker 1: Maybe no, he just realized that is he is. He 409 00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:56,639 Speaker 1: says to me sometimes, like, you know, most people are 410 00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,159 Speaker 1: are crazy, like you just got you gotta find the 411 00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:02,960 Speaker 1: crazy you can deal with. Uh? And man, is that crazy? 412 00:23:03,359 --> 00:23:07,240 Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know what those wise words? No 413 00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:12,680 Speaker 1: wiser words, wise words, and he's And it's funny because 414 00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:17,120 Speaker 1: when we would talk after rehab again, you know, he's 415 00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:23,040 Speaker 1: in rehab for for weeks months, and I talked to him. Um, 416 00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:24,840 Speaker 1: I think it was when I went down from my 417 00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:27,000 Speaker 1: visit and said, Pops, how's it going. He said, Man, 418 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:32,160 Speaker 1: let me tell you I'm a drunk and I hadn't 419 00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,040 Speaker 1: done right by a lot of my family. I tell you, 420 00:23:35,080 --> 00:23:39,240 Speaker 1: sit in this place long enough you realize so bad. 421 00:23:39,960 --> 00:23:47,520 Speaker 1: He proceeds because no one sounds crazy. Such is this 422 00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:50,640 Speaker 1: you know that old saying. Um, you know you put 423 00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:52,960 Speaker 1: all your problems on the table. Everyone puts their problems 424 00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:54,159 Speaker 1: on the table. You're like, let me just take my 425 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,119 Speaker 1: little problems back because I don't know what it's true. 426 00:23:56,280 --> 00:23:59,320 Speaker 1: I want your problems, but it's the longer you live. 427 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,919 Speaker 1: And so you know this. But my father's told me this. 428 00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:05,840 Speaker 1: We're all broken. Everyone's broken. Some people are better at 429 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:09,359 Speaker 1: pretending that they're not. We're hiding them. But we're all broken. 430 00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:12,159 Speaker 1: Everyone's broken. On the other side of the break, Craig 431 00:24:12,760 --> 00:24:14,960 Speaker 1: dives a little deeper into things I think we all 432 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:17,320 Speaker 1: want to know. Do not miss it. You can fast 433 00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:20,639 Speaker 1: forward through the commercial hit that thirty second fifteen second clip. 434 00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,480 Speaker 1: Craig Melvin on the other side of the break, Every 435 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:26,200 Speaker 1: champion and carry champion is to be a champion, a 436 00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:29,560 Speaker 1: champion and carry Chappion and carry Chappion, A champion and 437 00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:33,240 Speaker 1: carry Chappion and carry Chappion sports and then the taming 438 00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:42,440 Speaker 1: can make you work. Every Chappion and carry champion is 439 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,119 Speaker 1: to be a champion, a champion. They carry Chappi and 440 00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:49,919 Speaker 1: they champion they carry champion, they carry chappion spots, and 441 00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:53,240 Speaker 1: then the taming can make Hey, everybody, thank you for 442 00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:58,000 Speaker 1: being patient. Here's more with Craig Melvin. I love this. 443 00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:01,600 Speaker 1: I think this is, like you said, a story about 444 00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:03,720 Speaker 1: many things, but above all, I think it's also just 445 00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:06,760 Speaker 1: truly a love story. So I definitely encourage people to 446 00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:08,680 Speaker 1: read it, because at the end of the day, as 447 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,120 Speaker 1: corny as it may sound, if we employed that and 448 00:25:11,119 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 1: and we give that unconditionally, it changes all relationships and falling. 449 00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:21,399 Speaker 1: Oh yes, we're good. Let me tell you I had 450 00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:23,720 Speaker 1: to forgive him. I told him one time, like I 451 00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:27,719 Speaker 1: told you, Craig was gonna interview me, y'all. Um. We 452 00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 1: had this one conversation over a birthday dinner and by 453 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:34,560 Speaker 1: this time probably um he and I. He came back 454 00:25:34,560 --> 00:25:36,439 Speaker 1: into my life pretty happy. When I was eighteen and 455 00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,680 Speaker 1: nineteen kind of went away, came back, um and then 456 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:43,959 Speaker 1: so like in my thirties late twenties, he was always around. 457 00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,280 Speaker 1: But when I moved back to l A in twenty sixteen, 458 00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:48,639 Speaker 1: we would just you know, have dinner and lunches in 459 00:25:48,680 --> 00:25:52,280 Speaker 1: the whole nine and one day he was talking to 460 00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,240 Speaker 1: me and I remember it like it was yesterday and 461 00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:59,280 Speaker 1: he was explaining why he couldn't be around like you know, um, 462 00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:01,800 Speaker 1: you know, and she sometimes int like me, but you're 463 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:03,720 Speaker 1: And I said, hold on. What we're not going to 464 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:07,399 Speaker 1: do is ever talk bad about the woman who raised 465 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:09,680 Speaker 1: me when you were not a round. And I said 466 00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,679 Speaker 1: to him, so, let's just have this conversation. You chose 467 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:15,359 Speaker 1: the fast life. If you really wanted to see me 468 00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:17,760 Speaker 1: or your other children, you could have went to court. 469 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:21,280 Speaker 1: You could have petitioned, you could have hired an attorney. 470 00:26:21,640 --> 00:26:23,639 Speaker 1: You had enough money to do so. You know, you 471 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:25,159 Speaker 1: were a hustler. You could have figured. You could have 472 00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:27,720 Speaker 1: figured it out if it was burning and important to you, 473 00:26:27,760 --> 00:26:29,639 Speaker 1: because grown folks do we grown folks when I do. 474 00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:32,720 Speaker 1: And I was like, and he said, you're right. I 475 00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:34,720 Speaker 1: couldn't even finish. She was like, no, you're right, I 476 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:38,119 Speaker 1: am wrong. He was like, I chose my life. I was. 477 00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:41,960 Speaker 1: He just went into this wonderful, beautiful speech and it 478 00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:44,639 Speaker 1: was heartfelt, and then at the end he told me, 479 00:26:44,720 --> 00:26:48,439 Speaker 1: I'm so glad you told me the truth, like he respected. 480 00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:50,560 Speaker 1: It was hard for him to hear because no, one, no, 481 00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:52,639 Speaker 1: you have children, you you don't want to have that 482 00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:54,840 Speaker 1: conversation with your son or your daughter that you let 483 00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,640 Speaker 1: them down in their big age, you know what I mean, 484 00:26:57,640 --> 00:27:00,760 Speaker 1: and you chose something else beside to them. That's a 485 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:04,240 Speaker 1: hard thing to hear um and he helped and he 486 00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:07,639 Speaker 1: took it like a chap all pun intended. So that 487 00:27:08,040 --> 00:27:10,080 Speaker 1: is why I say, at the end of the day, 488 00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:14,040 Speaker 1: your book is about love, because we have to be 489 00:27:14,119 --> 00:27:17,400 Speaker 1: unconditional with it. Right, we give out expectation, We give 490 00:27:17,400 --> 00:27:20,040 Speaker 1: it without anybody thinking anything else but knowing at the 491 00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:21,679 Speaker 1: end of the day it's going to give us peace. 492 00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:26,560 Speaker 1: It's just beautiful and so many different stories. Craig, I 493 00:27:27,280 --> 00:27:28,960 Speaker 1: think this and I hate to even make this hard 494 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:32,919 Speaker 1: term because I have to. When I was having dinner 495 00:27:32,920 --> 00:27:37,200 Speaker 1: with Chanel when she was in l a random She's 496 00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:41,560 Speaker 1: so amazing. Let's just say that, Hey, I just pleasant 497 00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:46,040 Speaker 1: and fun. And we we've gotten to this conversation about 498 00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:49,080 Speaker 1: you know, black journalists and the roles that we play, 499 00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:52,720 Speaker 1: especially after George Floyd, and how how we were able 500 00:27:52,760 --> 00:27:55,840 Speaker 1: to speak from our own experiences as you write this 501 00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:57,919 Speaker 1: book about your father who was a black man who 502 00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:02,000 Speaker 1: grew up impoverished and worked this late shift. Life wasn't 503 00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:05,080 Speaker 1: easy for him outside of just his own demons, how 504 00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:07,480 Speaker 1: he lived in this out. I mean, I'm sure his 505 00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:11,479 Speaker 1: stories are legendary of racism and how he had to maneuver. 506 00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:16,119 Speaker 1: So here we are in this world and you have 507 00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:20,680 Speaker 1: this big, beautiful job, and you find yourself being asked 508 00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:24,480 Speaker 1: to talk about very personal things. Is there or was 509 00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:29,240 Speaker 1: there any hesitation in your spirit about speaking your truth? Um, 510 00:28:29,240 --> 00:28:34,359 Speaker 1: perhaps derailing where you are professional, taking away from your career, 511 00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:36,720 Speaker 1: taking away from your status, or your viewers. Are the 512 00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:42,400 Speaker 1: people who love you? There used to be no question, um, 513 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:46,880 Speaker 1: I would say, you know, I'm forty three. I don't 514 00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:51,320 Speaker 1: think I was probably comfortable in my own skin until 515 00:28:51,560 --> 00:28:57,000 Speaker 1: I was early mid thirties. Yeah, that's probably early mid thirties. 516 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,360 Speaker 1: And I think some of that was just immaturity. Some 517 00:28:59,480 --> 00:29:02,920 Speaker 1: of it was the result of life experiences. And for me, 518 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,240 Speaker 1: a lot of my worldview, if you will, has been 519 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,720 Speaker 1: shaped and molded by a lot of the stories that 520 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: I've covered, a lot of the people that I've had 521 00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:12,719 Speaker 1: the opportunity to talk to an interview and spent time with. 522 00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:17,400 Speaker 1: But no, I you know, now it sometimes to to 523 00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:20,680 Speaker 1: a to not not I won't take my detriment, But 524 00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:22,240 Speaker 1: every now and then I do have to. I have 525 00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:25,720 Speaker 1: to catch myself and remind myself that, you know, wait, 526 00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:29,880 Speaker 1: we'll wait a minute. Now. I need this job, and 527 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:33,719 Speaker 1: I need to be careful about what I say. Fortunately, 528 00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:36,600 Speaker 1: I work in a place and I'm not you know, 529 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:39,480 Speaker 1: I'm not not just I'm not just saying this because 530 00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:43,720 Speaker 1: you know, I'm I'm a happy employee. I remember, several 531 00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:46,880 Speaker 1: years ago, this is before George Floyd, I was encouraged 532 00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:52,280 Speaker 1: to be honest about how I felt about you know, 533 00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:54,720 Speaker 1: we were talking about diversity in the workplace, or the 534 00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:57,800 Speaker 1: lack thereof, and and the person I was having a 535 00:29:57,840 --> 00:30:01,000 Speaker 1: conversation with, I think could sense that I was walking 536 00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,400 Speaker 1: on eggshells, and they said, you know, we wait a minute, 537 00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,040 Speaker 1: I'll just be clear. I want you to and and 538 00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:10,120 Speaker 1: it ended up being a very refreshing conversation about at 539 00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:15,560 Speaker 1: the time a tremendous lack of diversity and not just 540 00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:19,840 Speaker 1: you know, and and our work in our little playground 541 00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:22,600 Speaker 1: that is the Today's Show, but at the company in general. Um, 542 00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:25,280 Speaker 1: and you know, since then, we've made some great strides. 543 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:28,160 Speaker 1: But I think a lot of people carry struggle with 544 00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:34,120 Speaker 1: with how honest can I be? Should I be? Yeah? 545 00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:36,800 Speaker 1: And it's you know, it's It's one of those things 546 00:30:36,840 --> 00:30:41,320 Speaker 1: where how Rooke and I have had this conversation numerous 547 00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 1: times because one of the things I've always admired about 548 00:30:44,240 --> 00:30:46,760 Speaker 1: him is his courage. And a lot of folks and 549 00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:50,320 Speaker 1: you can people can google this. But years ago, you 550 00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:54,200 Speaker 1: may recall there was a radio host who also had 551 00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:57,600 Speaker 1: a TV show who referred to some women college basketball 552 00:30:57,640 --> 00:31:01,480 Speaker 1: players who passed away up as not be headed hose. 553 00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:05,800 Speaker 1: And what a lot of folks don't know is one 554 00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:09,280 Speaker 1: of the people inside our company who led the charge 555 00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:14,440 Speaker 1: to make that right was our who who wrote letters, 556 00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:18,240 Speaker 1: who rallied other colleagues, who got on the phone, and 557 00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:21,320 Speaker 1: and wanted to make sure that people understood inside the 558 00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:24,960 Speaker 1: company and outside the company that that that was unacceptable. 559 00:31:25,120 --> 00:31:28,000 Speaker 1: And and so I have gotten to a point now 560 00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:32,840 Speaker 1: where I I see it as an obligation and so 561 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:34,960 Speaker 1: a lot of the stories that I do and a 562 00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:38,520 Speaker 1: lot of the stories that I don't do, um are 563 00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:44,720 Speaker 1: it comes from that place that makes sense, yeah, in 564 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:48,360 Speaker 1: my language. So, but but you don't realize, and you 565 00:31:48,440 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 1: probably didn't happen within trobally didn happen until few years ago. 566 00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:55,440 Speaker 1: You realize, Okay, I've got a little power. How how 567 00:31:55,440 --> 00:31:57,360 Speaker 1: am I going to use that power? Am I going 568 00:31:57,440 --> 00:32:01,320 Speaker 1: to use that power to negotiate, you know, the biggest 569 00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:05,840 Speaker 1: contract I can get for myself? Or am I going 570 00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:11,120 Speaker 1: to use that power two amplify certain voices and maybe 571 00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:16,480 Speaker 1: even diminish others and promote causes that advanced the cause? 572 00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,600 Speaker 1: And so but you mentioned George Floyd, I gotta be 573 00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:21,960 Speaker 1: host me. That for me was sort of the turning 574 00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:26,560 Speaker 1: points as a journalist. If if you this is my point, 575 00:32:26,920 --> 00:32:29,640 Speaker 1: this is a conversation, and it's okay to say this 576 00:32:29,680 --> 00:32:32,880 Speaker 1: for every black journalist or black and brown journalists more 577 00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:36,600 Speaker 1: specifically even a black male as a journal that is 578 00:32:37,000 --> 00:32:39,240 Speaker 1: it was life changing. And I'm just wanting to that 579 00:32:39,760 --> 00:32:43,080 Speaker 1: specifically for a culture and a collective that has had 580 00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:44,840 Speaker 1: to deal with that, and it had been very familiar 581 00:32:44,880 --> 00:32:46,600 Speaker 1: with that, and that wasn't a foreign story. But it's 582 00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:49,600 Speaker 1: just being televised so the world can see. And we're 583 00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:51,080 Speaker 1: at a point where the world could see because no 584 00:32:51,080 --> 00:32:54,000 Speaker 1: one out moves at home and see it changed you 585 00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:58,080 Speaker 1: in what way? It changed me? I didn't fully appreciate 586 00:32:58,120 --> 00:33:01,560 Speaker 1: the obligation that I had and and I and yeah, 587 00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:04,040 Speaker 1: I say, up until that point, I was taking that 588 00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:09,000 Speaker 1: obligation for granted, um, I was, you know, I would 589 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:11,680 Speaker 1: you know, I was doing hard news stories and I 590 00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:14,240 Speaker 1: would you know, I do features in sports. But I didn't. 591 00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:18,480 Speaker 1: I didn't necessarily always see the value and making sure 592 00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:24,240 Speaker 1: that people that look like us, we're being portrayed in 593 00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:29,000 Speaker 1: a way that made them human, you know, like it 594 00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:32,640 Speaker 1: was and so and over the over the course of 595 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:34,800 Speaker 1: those weeks and months, and you know, I was in 596 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:38,320 Speaker 1: in in Minneapolis and in Houston that the funerals and 597 00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:40,880 Speaker 1: the protests, and I covered all this stuff and it's 598 00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:43,200 Speaker 1: set with me. It's it's it's set with me in 599 00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:45,600 Speaker 1: a way that you know, I got on the phone 600 00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:49,480 Speaker 1: and I was talking to bosses and trying to figure 601 00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:53,680 Speaker 1: out how we could go about doing our jobs better 602 00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:58,880 Speaker 1: and and and accurately reflecting not just the black experience 603 00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:03,800 Speaker 1: in a more authentic way, but other experiences as well. 604 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:07,040 Speaker 1: And so but it but it was it was an awakening. 605 00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:10,000 Speaker 1: It was an awakening as as not just a journalist, 606 00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:14,160 Speaker 1: as a father, as a black man, and so anyway, 607 00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:17,240 Speaker 1: it helped me tremendously and in some of the stories 608 00:34:17,280 --> 00:34:19,560 Speaker 1: that we do now and I see it all the time, 609 00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:22,040 Speaker 1: you know, she now I have this conversation because sometimes 610 00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:24,879 Speaker 1: I'm not sure and I'm like this story that we're 611 00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:27,040 Speaker 1: doing right now, this isn't on TV five years ago. 612 00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:31,160 Speaker 1: This is no t V four years ago. Correct. The 613 00:34:31,200 --> 00:34:33,279 Speaker 1: games that we're playing with my sports that we're in 614 00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:37,319 Speaker 1: U c l A is satinga Alabama State first HBCU game. 615 00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:42,240 Speaker 1: There it We're seeing it across every platform because there's 616 00:34:42,239 --> 00:34:45,600 Speaker 1: a let me pay attention. Yes, ESPN is like, okay, 617 00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:50,480 Speaker 1: I'll cover some HBCU games. I remember doing a story 618 00:34:50,760 --> 00:34:53,600 Speaker 1: in twenty nine and someone said what is an HBCU 619 00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:57,359 Speaker 1: to me at work when I was there, And now 620 00:34:57,360 --> 00:35:00,680 Speaker 1: we're covering it. Now they're covering it another like crazy, right, 621 00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:04,839 Speaker 1: we're watching it happen in real time. It's you know what? 622 00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:08,320 Speaker 1: You know what I was gonna say to you? Oh, 623 00:35:08,480 --> 00:35:11,160 Speaker 1: I don't want to be mean, but what maybe I do. 624 00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:14,479 Speaker 1: I'm not for sure i'm gonna say to you because 625 00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:20,080 Speaker 1: you get the face. But I'm looking worried. Yeah, No, 626 00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:21,920 Speaker 1: I don't have anything about to say you at all, 627 00:35:22,080 --> 00:35:24,200 Speaker 1: never would I, but I like how you you you 628 00:35:24,280 --> 00:35:27,080 Speaker 1: listen with your face? Have you noticed everybody on TV 629 00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:29,920 Speaker 1: since with their face? Like? What are you saying to 630 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:33,400 Speaker 1: me one fun little note that I didn't know about you. 631 00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:35,480 Speaker 1: This is that, this is what I was gonna ask you. 632 00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:40,280 Speaker 1: When do you pledge because you I'm That was shocking 633 00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:44,520 Speaker 1: to me for some reason, that I pledged Kappa Sigmas, 634 00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:48,759 Speaker 1: the fraternity. I pledged nineties seven. So I went to 635 00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:52,680 Speaker 1: a college, Watford College, to small liberal Arts college and 636 00:35:52,760 --> 00:35:56,680 Speaker 1: upstate South Carolina, and I had noted to that point 637 00:35:56,719 --> 00:36:01,320 Speaker 1: in my life. My high school was probably seventy black, 638 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:06,760 Speaker 1: and that could be a conservative estimate. The white experience 639 00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:10,680 Speaker 1: was new to me, and I hate to generalize the stereotype, 640 00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,160 Speaker 1: but I think most people are saying what I'm talking 641 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:15,719 Speaker 1: about from in terms of college fraternities and sororities. But 642 00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:20,840 Speaker 1: I also grew up my mother like she put stalin 643 00:36:20,920 --> 00:36:23,680 Speaker 1: the shame, like she I there was there was no 644 00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:29,200 Speaker 1: freedom in my house. There was no people are like, oh, 645 00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:30,759 Speaker 1: like when you were in high school and you went 646 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:32,880 Speaker 1: to high school football games on Friday nights. I was like, 647 00:36:32,880 --> 00:36:34,839 Speaker 1: I didn't go to high school football games on Friday nights. 648 00:36:35,080 --> 00:36:38,600 Speaker 1: We were allowed to like go out. There was no 649 00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:43,240 Speaker 1: like when when I people think I'm exaggerating, And sometimes 650 00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:45,640 Speaker 1: when my mom's around. I have to tell I have 651 00:36:45,719 --> 00:36:49,080 Speaker 1: to mom, is moms this true? Yeah? You all my 652 00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:53,200 Speaker 1: friends to all their parents. And she overcompensated because my 653 00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:56,960 Speaker 1: dad was was was was physically present, but absently so. Anyway, 654 00:36:57,160 --> 00:37:00,120 Speaker 1: So I go off to college and in my in 655 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:07,640 Speaker 1: my freshman class, there were six black guys, six who 656 00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:13,120 Speaker 1: who did not play a sport. Um that makes sense, yes, 657 00:37:13,239 --> 00:37:16,040 Speaker 1: absolutely so most of the good except for the other six. 658 00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:23,279 Speaker 1: And so I wanted to have a social life. And 659 00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:25,839 Speaker 1: I got to college and I realized pretty quickly that 660 00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:27,920 Speaker 1: the folks who are having the most fun on campus 661 00:37:28,239 --> 00:37:31,840 Speaker 1: were in fraternities and sororities. And what I what I 662 00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:37,080 Speaker 1: did not realize until a few weeks into the pledging process. 663 00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:40,919 Speaker 1: In this particularly fraternity went for college, there had never 664 00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:45,360 Speaker 1: been a black number. Yeah, And there was me and 665 00:37:45,360 --> 00:37:47,839 Speaker 1: this other guy, Corey Porter, and the two of us 666 00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:50,799 Speaker 1: we were pledged at the same time. And at one 667 00:37:50,800 --> 00:37:53,239 Speaker 1: point we had a conversation. We're like, well, you know, 668 00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:54,719 Speaker 1: is this the best thing? And keep in mind I 669 00:37:54,800 --> 00:38:00,160 Speaker 1: came from a long lot of campus um uncle like 670 00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:05,080 Speaker 1: grand Paul Margain, I mean just and so it led 671 00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:08,960 Speaker 1: this like some awkwardness for a couple of months h 672 00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:12,040 Speaker 1: and finally I was just like, you know what, I'm 673 00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:14,800 Speaker 1: gonna be here for four years. And that was it. 674 00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:16,719 Speaker 1: And and some of the some of the guys and 675 00:38:17,080 --> 00:38:19,040 Speaker 1: some of my fraternity brothers from college, some of my 676 00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:22,959 Speaker 1: best friends now hands down, hands down. By the way, though, 677 00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:26,000 Speaker 1: one why said, I'm surprised you don't seem like you too, like, oh, 678 00:38:26,040 --> 00:38:27,400 Speaker 1: I want to pledge. You seem like you'd be your 679 00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,520 Speaker 1: own person, You'll follow me, do what I want to do. Right, 680 00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,080 Speaker 1: That's how I feel like you would have been number 681 00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:33,000 Speaker 1: but number two. You're absolutely right because at the end 682 00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:35,359 Speaker 1: of the day, it is about the friendships you make, 683 00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:37,440 Speaker 1: so if they are lifelong friends. And it was a 684 00:38:37,440 --> 00:38:39,560 Speaker 1: great experience for you, I love you like it, I 685 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:43,680 Speaker 1: love it, I received it. It's it's funny because I 686 00:38:43,960 --> 00:38:47,680 Speaker 1: you know, sometimes you're you're in the moment. At that point, 687 00:38:47,719 --> 00:38:52,359 Speaker 1: I was eighteen and I didn't realize um like it was. 688 00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:56,200 Speaker 1: It was a bigger deal for other people then it 689 00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:58,280 Speaker 1: was for me. I was just looking to meet girls 690 00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:03,839 Speaker 1: on the weekends and drink, you know, and I just 691 00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:08,279 Speaker 1: that was that was experience, Yes, And I wanted to 692 00:39:08,320 --> 00:39:10,279 Speaker 1: go with the place that was going to give me 693 00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:15,160 Speaker 1: the greatest opportunity to do that. Yeah. Then all of 694 00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,320 Speaker 1: a sudden it's like, oh, you made some history of 695 00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,000 Speaker 1: the college. It's like, no, I didn't not to make 696 00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:23,000 Speaker 1: any history. I just with the numbers said the greatest 697 00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:28,480 Speaker 1: opportunity to do so. I mean, did your pledge No, 698 00:39:28,920 --> 00:39:30,759 Speaker 1: I would. I thought about it, but I was like, 699 00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,640 Speaker 1: I don't need nobody, but now that you, I will 700 00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:35,560 Speaker 1: tell you my regrets and I not that there are. 701 00:39:35,680 --> 00:39:39,319 Speaker 1: But it is an incredible sorority slash fraternity of people. 702 00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:41,879 Speaker 1: It's a great networking system. People want to do things 703 00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:43,279 Speaker 1: for you. I see it all the time with my 704 00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:46,000 Speaker 1: girlfriends who are who are now some pledging as adults. 705 00:39:46,000 --> 00:39:48,680 Speaker 1: It's that because that's become more popular too, where I 706 00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:51,360 Speaker 1: don't know what the term is. Are they honorary or 707 00:39:51,360 --> 00:39:53,960 Speaker 1: they make them when they are a full grown adults. 708 00:39:53,960 --> 00:39:56,359 Speaker 1: Had a friend who was it's something and she said, 709 00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:57,960 Speaker 1: A k A, Now I don't I'm missing that. I 710 00:39:58,000 --> 00:39:59,719 Speaker 1: can see you as you would be an a kid. 711 00:40:00,239 --> 00:40:02,160 Speaker 1: You think so oh am I giving you jack and 712 00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:08,600 Speaker 1: jeel energy. I didn't. I felt like, of course she is, 713 00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:14,520 Speaker 1: but I I feel like I'm right. The compliment, that's 714 00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:19,120 Speaker 1: a compliment. It is, but I feel away. I feel like, no, 715 00:40:19,440 --> 00:40:22,799 Speaker 1: I'm from the hood, not really, but yeah, no, I 716 00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:32,439 Speaker 1: mean you you're not fully anyone, Carrie. It's not um No, 717 00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:34,640 Speaker 1: but I didn't. I've been thinking about it though, and 718 00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:36,960 Speaker 1: I have no no shade to aks a doubt. There's 719 00:40:36,960 --> 00:40:39,759 Speaker 1: no shade to Jack and jail again. I just came 720 00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:43,160 Speaker 1: from Martha's vineyard. I was very familiar and indoctrinated into 721 00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,799 Speaker 1: the Jack, Jack and Joel lifestyle there. It's funny you 722 00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:48,440 Speaker 1: mention Martha's bringing. My mother was today today is we're 723 00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:50,520 Speaker 1: doing this one? My mother is going in two days? 724 00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:53,879 Speaker 1: Are you going? No? I just saw mom. I can't 725 00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:56,560 Speaker 1: vacation with mom for days. I just saw. I was 726 00:40:56,600 --> 00:40:59,359 Speaker 1: with mom for a week in South Carolina two weeks ago, 727 00:41:00,000 --> 00:41:01,920 Speaker 1: and she was up here for a long weekend. My 728 00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:04,480 Speaker 1: MoMA not just taking a little break. Yeah, okay, I'll 729 00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:07,239 Speaker 1: see you again. Yeah, she's going with the girls. But 730 00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:11,600 Speaker 1: you know, it's like it's the Black Mecca. It was 731 00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,760 Speaker 1: my first time. It was unbelievab. It was your first time. 732 00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:17,800 Speaker 1: That's stunning, which is why I keep telling you I 733 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:20,400 Speaker 1: knew nothing about this Jack in this jail. It was 734 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:26,160 Speaker 1: my going, all right, Greg, I see much of your time. 735 00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:27,960 Speaker 1: I know you have to go again. You have been 736 00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:32,280 Speaker 1: a pleasure. I'm just very happy that I'm being allowed 737 00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:34,960 Speaker 1: to see another side of you. Uh, the humanity part 738 00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:38,200 Speaker 1: is important, So it's great. Well, you're very good at this. 739 00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:41,719 Speaker 1: You should charge people to come on, because I feel 740 00:41:41,719 --> 00:41:43,800 Speaker 1: like this is therapy. For the last forty five minutes, 741 00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:46,480 Speaker 1: it was therapy for me. See me a bill, I 742 00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:49,080 Speaker 1: write your check. You don't play with me. I know 743 00:41:49,080 --> 00:41:50,600 Speaker 1: you've got that big Today Show money. I've got the 744 00:41:51,080 --> 00:41:56,080 Speaker 1: right now. I know actually he's documented. He's gonna give 745 00:41:56,120 --> 00:42:05,160 Speaker 1: me a million dollars. Guys. Thanks, Um. That was beautiful. 746 00:42:05,840 --> 00:42:09,440 Speaker 1: And to be honest, I overrelate in every way with 747 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:11,919 Speaker 1: my father, with my mother. Addiction is a real thing. 748 00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:15,239 Speaker 1: It's a disease, and if you don't understand that it's 749 00:42:15,239 --> 00:42:18,239 Speaker 1: a disease, you don't have compassion. And that's what I 750 00:42:18,239 --> 00:42:19,880 Speaker 1: love about this book, and what I love about what 751 00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:23,560 Speaker 1: Craig talked about is that when he understood addiction and 752 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:25,600 Speaker 1: what it meant, he was able to see his father 753 00:42:25,719 --> 00:42:28,600 Speaker 1: and other people in a different way. It also spoke 754 00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:31,920 Speaker 1: to who he was what he needed to improve on. 755 00:42:32,719 --> 00:42:34,879 Speaker 1: I'm telling you hold a mirror up to someone else. 756 00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:37,040 Speaker 1: Really is a reflection of who you are. When you 757 00:42:37,120 --> 00:42:40,239 Speaker 1: do certain things to people, there's a reason why. When 758 00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:43,399 Speaker 1: you behave a certain way towards people, there's a reason why. 759 00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:46,239 Speaker 1: And I'm all about the empathy and compassion. I never 760 00:42:46,239 --> 00:42:49,200 Speaker 1: get it right, but I'm all about it. So please 761 00:42:49,239 --> 00:42:52,359 Speaker 1: check out this book. Uh, salute to correct support him 762 00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:56,720 Speaker 1: on the Today Show. And I say this in closing. 763 00:42:57,080 --> 00:42:58,920 Speaker 1: I always like to do news and notes in the beginning, 764 00:42:58,920 --> 00:43:01,279 Speaker 1: and I didn't really have much because I didn't really 765 00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:04,040 Speaker 1: do much. Uh. The summer is coming to an end, 766 00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:06,719 Speaker 1: and we are all trying to figure out how we 767 00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:08,959 Speaker 1: get back to this work mode because we are still 768 00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:11,319 Speaker 1: definitely in summer mode. I know I'm having a hard time, 769 00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:17,480 Speaker 1: So do me a favor and definitely relax and enjoy yourself. 770 00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:21,520 Speaker 1: You deserve it no matter what. Okay, enjoy the last 771 00:43:21,560 --> 00:43:25,080 Speaker 1: few weeks of summer, keep supporting your girl and naked, 772 00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:26,560 Speaker 1: and I'll talk to you all next week.