1 00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:06,000 Speaker 1: This is the most dramatic podcast ever and iHeartRadio podcast. 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:09,920 Speaker 1: Chris Harrison and Lauren Zema coming to you from the 3 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:13,520 Speaker 1: home office in Austin, Texas. LZ, how you doing. 4 00:00:13,840 --> 00:00:17,279 Speaker 2: I'm so good. My voice is back. I'm probably going 5 00:00:17,320 --> 00:00:19,560 Speaker 2: to lose it again as of tomorrow because I'm leaving 6 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:22,480 Speaker 2: again for a week. But I'm enjoying this moment. Sees 7 00:00:22,920 --> 00:00:24,480 Speaker 2: the moment of success. 8 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:26,079 Speaker 1: A good season, as you like to say, We're in 9 00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:29,160 Speaker 1: a good season. You have this amazing trip coming up. 10 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,160 Speaker 1: We're not going to dive into what and why you're 11 00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:35,159 Speaker 1: going away for a week from me, but I do 12 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:37,199 Speaker 1: want to talk about it because it's really special and 13 00:00:37,240 --> 00:00:40,159 Speaker 1: it's beautiful, and we'll dive into it like maybe a 14 00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:40,840 Speaker 1: week from now. 15 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:43,040 Speaker 2: And let's say the word week one more time. I 16 00:00:43,040 --> 00:00:44,280 Speaker 2: think we've had a really good week. 17 00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:45,160 Speaker 1: We've had a great week. 18 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:46,280 Speaker 2: We've gotten a lot done. 19 00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:49,080 Speaker 1: Very wedding week. Is that a thing? We've had a 20 00:00:49,080 --> 00:00:51,080 Speaker 1: wedding lee week, you know. 21 00:00:51,560 --> 00:00:54,200 Speaker 2: And I will say this being the second time I've 22 00:00:54,560 --> 00:00:58,160 Speaker 2: done this wedding thing. Speaking from experience, I think wedding 23 00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:01,360 Speaker 2: planning is a roller coaster. I mean a emotionally for 24 00:01:01,400 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 2: a lot of people, but be literally, don't you feel 25 00:01:04,560 --> 00:01:06,360 Speaker 2: we sort of get a lot done and then we 26 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:08,000 Speaker 2: kind of step away from it for a while, and 27 00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,399 Speaker 2: then you sort of knock out a bunch in a 28 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:12,320 Speaker 2: week and then you come back. And I think that's 29 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:14,840 Speaker 2: better because then you're not thinking about it all the time. 30 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 2: But it makes sense because there's some things you have 31 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,080 Speaker 2: to get done really far out, like book your venue, 32 00:01:20,360 --> 00:01:23,760 Speaker 2: book your music, and then closer on, you know some 33 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:25,959 Speaker 2: things you can't do so far out, so closer on, 34 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:28,560 Speaker 2: we're starting to get a few things done. Do you 35 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,479 Speaker 2: think we delayed on anything. I'm getting nervous because when 36 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,679 Speaker 2: I speak to some people, they sort of seem alarmed at. 37 00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:37,559 Speaker 1: Our lack of I know, I think I was cutting 38 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:42,560 Speaker 1: it close. I just went up to Dallas and had 39 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,920 Speaker 1: suits made for it was big this week for me 40 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:49,200 Speaker 1: and the groomsmen, the people that'll be a part of 41 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:53,880 Speaker 1: our wedding. And I didn't realize, you know, we're cutting 42 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:56,320 Speaker 1: it close. And so I went to an amazing. 43 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 2: And they tell you that you were. 44 00:01:57,160 --> 00:02:00,000 Speaker 1: Yeah. So I went to Kin's man Shop in Dallas, Texas. 45 00:02:00,080 --> 00:02:03,120 Speaker 1: This amazing habitashery, which is a word we don't use 46 00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:06,720 Speaker 1: enough anymore. Like old school Habitashery. You probably had a 47 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:08,919 Speaker 1: lot of them in Chicago, because I think Chicago and 48 00:02:08,960 --> 00:02:12,480 Speaker 1: I think suits and fedoras and those kind of the old, 49 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:14,240 Speaker 1: great looking men's. 50 00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:16,600 Speaker 2: So it's a men's shop. Does Habitdashery mean you get 51 00:02:16,600 --> 00:02:17,960 Speaker 2: it tailored, you get it especially made. 52 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, like they make your suits and it's you know, 53 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 1: it's old school. And the way they treat you whiskey. Yeah. 54 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:25,440 Speaker 1: You spend the day and they'll you know, or your 55 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:28,280 Speaker 1: old steak sandwich or whatever, and you you really they 56 00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:30,680 Speaker 1: know you your family. And so I went to this 57 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:34,120 Speaker 1: amazing it is phenomenal men's shop in Dallas, Texas called 58 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:37,799 Speaker 1: Kinsman Shop that I go to frequently, and they are 59 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:41,720 Speaker 1: making my wedding suits. And so went with my brother 60 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:47,320 Speaker 1: your brother, yes, my son, and we you know, we're 61 00:02:47,320 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 1: getting suits put together and it was really fun. It 62 00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:52,720 Speaker 1: was great. But we're cutting it close. We're cutting it close, 63 00:02:52,760 --> 00:02:54,720 Speaker 1: they said, because they they're like, we got to build 64 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:57,880 Speaker 1: these from scratch, buddy. So there are some things we're 65 00:02:57,919 --> 00:03:01,160 Speaker 1: taken care of, and it's it's it's approaching quickly, but 66 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:06,080 Speaker 1: I'm I'm it's building an excitement. I am really unbelievably excited. 67 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:09,120 Speaker 2: I don't know why. Four to six weeks is like 68 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:12,359 Speaker 2: the cooking equivalent of three hundred and fifty degrees. Everything's 69 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,520 Speaker 2: at that. If you put pretty much anything in your 70 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,000 Speaker 2: oven at three fifty, count on four to six weeks 71 00:03:17,000 --> 00:03:19,440 Speaker 2: for just anything to be made. And so I do 72 00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:22,639 Speaker 2: think we're we're cutting it close, but we're not down 73 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:25,400 Speaker 2: to the wire yet. And I have to say, I 74 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:28,360 Speaker 2: mean I cried twice this week with all this wedding 75 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:31,320 Speaker 2: stuff we were getting done, both for good reason. First, 76 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:34,400 Speaker 2: you just mentioned bringing my brother with you. I have 77 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 2: to applaud you because I was away on my girl's trip. 78 00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:42,440 Speaker 2: You were planning this thing this day to take the 79 00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,720 Speaker 2: guy's shopping for suits, and I didn't even know you'd 80 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 2: plan this with my brother, And you had his flight 81 00:03:48,360 --> 00:03:51,120 Speaker 2: handled and had him fly in, and it just meant 82 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 2: the world to me that you included him without even 83 00:03:54,280 --> 00:03:58,400 Speaker 2: a question and he had an amazing time. It is 84 00:03:58,440 --> 00:04:00,440 Speaker 2: such a good reminder well in that me me cry. 85 00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:04,279 Speaker 2: And it's such a good reminder too to have the experience. 86 00:04:04,480 --> 00:04:06,960 Speaker 2: I think sometimes when you're planning something like a wedding, 87 00:04:07,000 --> 00:04:08,800 Speaker 2: it's get it done. What's on the to do list? 88 00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:10,840 Speaker 2: What do we have to do. But it looked like 89 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:13,880 Speaker 2: you all had a really beautiful day just enjoying trying 90 00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,280 Speaker 2: the suits on and picking it out. 91 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:18,480 Speaker 1: It was awesome. And that's that's why I would recommend 92 00:04:18,839 --> 00:04:22,360 Speaker 1: going to a habitasary because just like saying I do 93 00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:24,920 Speaker 1: like saying it. It's very high, right, I feel like 94 00:04:24,920 --> 00:04:27,160 Speaker 1: I should have a whiskey in my hand. But spending 95 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,360 Speaker 1: the day going through all the kind of the swatches 96 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:32,240 Speaker 1: and picking it up, it was just a thing that 97 00:04:32,279 --> 00:04:34,720 Speaker 1: brought us all together and everybody was collaborating of what 98 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,640 Speaker 1: we thought would look great and what we were doing. 99 00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:39,960 Speaker 1: And I kind of turned it into I didn't want 100 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:41,960 Speaker 1: to have a bachelor party, but that's what I kind 101 00:04:41,960 --> 00:04:44,320 Speaker 1: of turned into. My bachelor party was the night before 102 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:48,920 Speaker 1: your brother, my brother, his son, my godson, and mine, 103 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,440 Speaker 1: we all went to the Texas Ranger game. My brother 104 00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,680 Speaker 1: and I grew up going to the Ranger games with 105 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:55,480 Speaker 1: my dad and it means a lot to us. We 106 00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 1: love baseball and we've always loved the Texas Rangers. So 107 00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:01,760 Speaker 1: we were in town, went to a Ranger game and 108 00:05:01,839 --> 00:05:03,479 Speaker 1: we were just hanging out, watched the ball game, and 109 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,240 Speaker 1: then we got out the next day, had suits made. 110 00:05:05,279 --> 00:05:07,080 Speaker 1: It was cool. It was my kind of bachelor party. 111 00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:11,400 Speaker 2: I mean, maybe this sweetest and most productive bachelor party ever. 112 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:13,920 Speaker 2: I have to give you a tip of the hat. 113 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:16,680 Speaker 2: Not only did you have a tame, chill bachelor party, 114 00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:17,760 Speaker 2: but you got things done. 115 00:05:17,839 --> 00:05:20,279 Speaker 1: You were getting tasks a coo and I mean, if 116 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,520 Speaker 1: truth be told, moved Joshua back into TCU, so had 117 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: to move him into college in Fort Worth. Then we 118 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:27,960 Speaker 1: went to the game then, so we really got a 119 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:28,680 Speaker 1: lot done. 120 00:05:28,960 --> 00:05:33,719 Speaker 2: So we also got done. Picking out our wedding bands, 121 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:37,960 Speaker 2: our wedding ring. Do you say wedding ring or wedding band? 122 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,839 Speaker 1: I wear wedding ring, I would think, Unless I'm completely wrong, No, I. 123 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:43,320 Speaker 2: Don't know why I say wedding band. And then I 124 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:45,599 Speaker 2: keep saying and I think people think I'm talking different 125 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 2: the music. 126 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,279 Speaker 1: I think yours would be different because you have a 127 00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:51,920 Speaker 1: wedding ring on, right or is that just our engagement right? 128 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:53,480 Speaker 2: I think that's the engager ring. I think I'm weird. 129 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,239 Speaker 2: I have to stop saying wedding band. It's confusing. 130 00:05:55,240 --> 00:05:55,680 Speaker 1: Maybe. 131 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 2: So we picked out our wedding ring, yes, and I 132 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:01,320 Speaker 2: cried there too. I didn't think I was gonna cry, 133 00:06:01,720 --> 00:06:04,599 Speaker 2: but we sort of found one for me kind of 134 00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:08,560 Speaker 2: right away, and you ended up with one that you 135 00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:09,839 Speaker 2: did not think you were going. 136 00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 1: To know, I did not think so. First of all, 137 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: we went to this great local spot, m Robinson. 138 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:19,960 Speaker 2: M Robinson Fine Jewelers. The most magical experience because the 139 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,440 Speaker 2: store itself is so beautiful. They have a full bar 140 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,280 Speaker 2: and in this jeweler, Yeah, that's really cool. 141 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:27,760 Speaker 1: We walk into a great bar. 142 00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:30,200 Speaker 2: I mean whatever I get. It's sort of the equivalent 143 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,799 Speaker 2: of a habitashery in the best way. It's very special 144 00:06:32,839 --> 00:06:35,280 Speaker 2: and curated. They have a full bar, they give you 145 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:39,680 Speaker 2: a glass of champagne, and again, they make shopping an experience. 146 00:06:39,760 --> 00:06:43,000 Speaker 2: I always feel like I'm having, in the best way, 147 00:06:43,040 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 2: this pretty woman moment or a movie moment. It's a 148 00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:50,159 Speaker 2: gorgeous store. They've actually won design awards for the layout 149 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:52,400 Speaker 2: and look of the store, and they have so much 150 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:53,000 Speaker 2: great selection. 151 00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:56,360 Speaker 1: We just love the fact that we're shopping local. Yah, 152 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:59,479 Speaker 1: supporting the folks here in Austin. And I had this 153 00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:04,000 Speaker 1: idea my head of wearing a ring. Again. Obviously, I've 154 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:07,480 Speaker 1: been married before, as has LZ, and so my last 155 00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:09,320 Speaker 1: ring was very specific because I had something to do 156 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,880 Speaker 1: with my grandfather, but it was gold, and I just thought, 157 00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:13,720 Speaker 1: you know, I'm probably not gonna wear gold. And I 158 00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 1: even told Elz the night before as she asked me, 159 00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:17,720 Speaker 1: what do you think? And I said, you know, I 160 00:07:17,720 --> 00:07:21,320 Speaker 1: don't think I'm gonna wear gold. I so, but what. 161 00:07:21,120 --> 00:07:24,440 Speaker 2: Was funny is in my head and I really wanted 162 00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:26,560 Speaker 2: this to be your decision, but he's saying, I don't 163 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,080 Speaker 2: think I'm gonna weear gold. I'm gonna get like white 164 00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:32,239 Speaker 2: gold or silver titanium. And in my head, I was thinking, 165 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:35,000 Speaker 2: I'm picturing him in a gold wedding band. But I 166 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,440 Speaker 2: didn't want to project my image on to you. This 167 00:07:37,520 --> 00:07:39,080 Speaker 2: is something you wear every day, and I wanted to 168 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:39,680 Speaker 2: be what you like. 169 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:41,920 Speaker 1: And you let you let me come to the conclusion 170 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:43,239 Speaker 1: that was yours from the first. 171 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:45,640 Speaker 2: Maybe that's a mental tactic I took from you. 172 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,720 Speaker 1: I'm then used on you, and I'm a big believer 173 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:50,720 Speaker 1: you're kind of like this too. You will, you'll take 174 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 1: more time afterwards, but you definitely come to conclusions quickly 175 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:57,000 Speaker 1: like I do. I am heartfelt. I if I have 176 00:07:57,120 --> 00:08:00,680 Speaker 1: that emotion with something, a house, a car, in this case, 177 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:04,040 Speaker 1: my wedding ring, if I feel it, that's it. I'm done, 178 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:07,200 Speaker 1: I am smitten, I've fallen in love. You are the one. 179 00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:10,120 Speaker 1: And that's how I felt about this ring that we 180 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:13,240 Speaker 1: found and in Yes, you were right, it's gold. And 181 00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:15,280 Speaker 1: as soon as I saw it, and I was even 182 00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:17,760 Speaker 1: reluctant to try it on, I probably wouldn't have even 183 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:19,920 Speaker 1: tried it on if you hadn't said hey, just take 184 00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:21,920 Speaker 1: a look. And as soon as I did, it was over. 185 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 1: It was done. 186 00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:26,920 Speaker 2: It's interesting, I think, particularly with wedding stuff, people picture 187 00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:29,040 Speaker 2: it in their heads, you know. And I learned wedding 188 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:32,640 Speaker 2: dress shopping actually because a good salesperson will say, hey, 189 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:35,320 Speaker 2: why don't we just try something on that's totally different 190 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:37,360 Speaker 2: from what you were thinking, just to see how it feels, 191 00:08:37,760 --> 00:08:40,199 Speaker 2: and you put that dress on, and then I actually 192 00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:44,199 Speaker 2: think oftentimes it's wait, this is the dress because it's funny. 193 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:46,160 Speaker 2: I don't know why we have this image. But then 194 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,480 Speaker 2: if someone just suggests something else and gets us outside 195 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,600 Speaker 2: of our comfort zone a little bit, you know, it's 196 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 2: such an I think you it's such an important day 197 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:54,680 Speaker 2: that you can get a little set in your ways, 198 00:08:54,679 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 2: in your mind. 199 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:58,520 Speaker 1: And do you think that oftentimes? In life? Sometimes dating, 200 00:08:58,600 --> 00:09:01,880 Speaker 1: sometimes whatever it is, if you like something that you 201 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,559 Speaker 1: were pretty dead set on not liking. That says a 202 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:08,320 Speaker 1: lot like I was going into it not thinking I 203 00:09:08,360 --> 00:09:10,280 Speaker 1: was going to like that, and then when you do, 204 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:12,160 Speaker 1: it's even a bigger emotion. 205 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:14,840 Speaker 2: It's a reminder to stay open. Right. It's like what 206 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:17,199 Speaker 2: I tell my friend my single friends with dating, they 207 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:20,319 Speaker 2: have this check mark licks list, and you know, I 208 00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:22,800 Speaker 2: got to check all these boxes of things, and it's hey, 209 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:25,320 Speaker 2: stay open because the guy who doesn't fit any of 210 00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:30,240 Speaker 2: those might be the perfect eye for you. And well 211 00:09:30,240 --> 00:09:32,360 Speaker 2: you just mentioned I think it was also a lesson 212 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:36,040 Speaker 2: and yeah, just know thyself and how we react to things. 213 00:09:36,080 --> 00:09:38,840 Speaker 2: But I found my ring. I think it was the 214 00:09:38,840 --> 00:09:41,320 Speaker 2: first one I tried on. It was I saw it, 215 00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:44,600 Speaker 2: I did. I did feel like, okay, that looks like me, 216 00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:47,240 Speaker 2: but I had no idea what I wanted going in. 217 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,360 Speaker 2: It was the first one I tried on. I kind 218 00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:53,720 Speaker 2: of started crying. But then the way I operate, you're 219 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:56,880 Speaker 2: very confident, you think I picked this, this is it. 220 00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,200 Speaker 2: I love it. I had to go then try on 221 00:09:59,480 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 2: maybe email thing twenty more rings so that I knew 222 00:10:03,559 --> 00:10:05,000 Speaker 2: that in my head, I was comparing it to that 223 00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 2: first ring, and I knew that ring was the ring 224 00:10:06,640 --> 00:10:10,160 Speaker 2: for me. So it's a process. Yeah, It's just like 225 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,200 Speaker 2: how when we started dating, I had to go date 226 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:13,960 Speaker 2: twenty more kidding funny. 227 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:17,080 Speaker 1: I was about to ask, is that what happened? And 228 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:21,480 Speaker 1: I immediately saw that ring on your finger and I 229 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:24,040 Speaker 1: knew that was the one. It was. There's just something 230 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:27,640 Speaker 1: about it. It's weird when they just things like that fit. 231 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:30,760 Speaker 1: It just looked right, it was beautiful. It was just 232 00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,480 Speaker 1: I fell in love with it and I can't wait 233 00:10:33,520 --> 00:10:34,400 Speaker 1: to put it on your finger. 234 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,880 Speaker 2: It was a beautiful day. It was so much fun, 235 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:40,199 Speaker 2: and I am I continue to kind of be pleasantly 236 00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:43,599 Speaker 2: surprised by like everything feels easy. I don't want to 237 00:10:43,679 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 2: jinx it. And then, you know, I don't know when 238 00:10:46,640 --> 00:10:48,640 Speaker 2: you will. Maybe when you allow yourself to not push 239 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:50,720 Speaker 2: so much pressure on it, then it allows just the 240 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:51,920 Speaker 2: happiness to come in. Well. 241 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:54,760 Speaker 1: And I know there are hurdles ahead. I know we 242 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,959 Speaker 1: will trip and stumble. I know something's going to hit us. 243 00:10:57,280 --> 00:10:59,880 Speaker 1: That'll be you know, whatever, there will be a little something. 244 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:04,520 Speaker 1: I feel like, knock on wood, that you and I 245 00:11:04,559 --> 00:11:06,720 Speaker 1: will handle it well. I feel like you and I 246 00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:09,480 Speaker 1: know the end goal, the endgame is that we have 247 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,760 Speaker 1: this amazing wedding and we're just together and we say 248 00:11:11,760 --> 00:11:14,200 Speaker 1: I do and that that's the most important thing. So 249 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,600 Speaker 1: I think when that does come, I think you will. 250 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:18,959 Speaker 1: We will be good at picking each other up, dust 251 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:21,960 Speaker 1: each other off, and we're heading to the big picture. 252 00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 2: You gotta pivot, You got to move forward. Yeah, the 253 00:11:24,559 --> 00:11:27,560 Speaker 2: most important quality in life adapting with change. I say 254 00:11:27,559 --> 00:11:29,200 Speaker 2: this now, who knows how I feel if something goes 255 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:32,400 Speaker 2: really wrong. But the problem is if slash. When something 256 00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:34,679 Speaker 2: goes wrong on your wedding day, and it's probably guaranteed 257 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:37,560 Speaker 2: to if you don't respond, well, then you've ruined the 258 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,800 Speaker 2: rest of your own wedding day and the only person 259 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:40,760 Speaker 2: you're hurting is yourself. 260 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:55,160 Speaker 1: I said something interesting to your brother. We were talking 261 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,600 Speaker 1: about the wedding, and he goes, I love this. I'm 262 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:00,280 Speaker 1: going to take that and steal it because you're brothers 263 00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:02,760 Speaker 1: not married yet, and it's something you say a lot, 264 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,760 Speaker 1: and I repeat it. We were talking about who's going 265 00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,520 Speaker 1: to be at the wedding. He was asking about, you know, 266 00:12:07,559 --> 00:12:10,319 Speaker 1: who else is going to be there. It's very very small, intimate, 267 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:14,400 Speaker 1: and I said, I don't want to meet anybody on 268 00:12:14,440 --> 00:12:17,520 Speaker 1: our wedding day, and he stopped me. He's like, what 269 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:19,760 Speaker 1: I said, I don't you know, Lauren, and I believe 270 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:21,840 Speaker 1: we don't want to be introduced to anybody on our 271 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:25,760 Speaker 1: wedding day, meaning we don't want strangers there. And he said, 272 00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,520 Speaker 1: he you know, John, your brother was like, that is 273 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:32,000 Speaker 1: the most amazing quote. I'm taking that and I'm taking 274 00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:34,839 Speaker 1: that to my own wedding someday. And I don't know 275 00:12:34,880 --> 00:12:36,760 Speaker 1: if that's a novel thing, but I you know. 276 00:12:36,760 --> 00:12:43,600 Speaker 2: Where I got that far from Wells's Wells Adams's brother's wife. Okay, 277 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:46,160 Speaker 2: Wells's sister in law. We were hanging out a golf thing. 278 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:48,680 Speaker 2: Wells's brother was caddying for him, and we were talking 279 00:12:48,679 --> 00:12:51,520 Speaker 2: about weddings and Brett's wife said that they had the 280 00:12:51,559 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 2: agreement they didn't want to meet anybody at their wedding, 281 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,160 Speaker 2: meaning Okay, yes, this person might be your childhood friend, 282 00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:59,320 Speaker 2: but if I haven't met him five years into the 283 00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:01,199 Speaker 2: relationship at this point, I mean. 284 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:01,920 Speaker 1: How good of a friend. 285 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:04,640 Speaker 2: Yes, so it is a good marker and I credit 286 00:13:04,679 --> 00:13:05,280 Speaker 2: them for that. 287 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:07,160 Speaker 1: And we well, then that's who we've stolen it from. 288 00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:08,800 Speaker 1: Now your brother's stealing it from us, and I think 289 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:12,000 Speaker 1: it is a great rule of thumb to take into 290 00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:14,559 Speaker 1: your wedding. Of Hey, between the two of us, let's 291 00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:17,800 Speaker 1: not meet somebody for the first time after we've just 292 00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:20,600 Speaker 1: said I do at the most intimate moment of our lives. 293 00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:23,600 Speaker 1: And so that was an interesting conversation with your brother 294 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:24,000 Speaker 1: as well. 295 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:26,720 Speaker 2: Let's talk about another interesting conversation you had with him. 296 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:31,199 Speaker 2: This is so funny, what a what family members will 297 00:13:31,240 --> 00:13:34,280 Speaker 2: reveal when given the opportunity to be alone with your partner. 298 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:37,240 Speaker 2: Chris and my brother have never spent like, have never 299 00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:41,160 Speaker 2: done a trip away together. And also a lesson in 300 00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:44,960 Speaker 2: the trauma we inflict on our siblings. You told me 301 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:47,400 Speaker 2: this story that he told you, and I have zero 302 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:49,080 Speaker 2: recollection of this and it's so weird. 303 00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:53,720 Speaker 1: So the Ziema family, there's two older sisters. There is Lauren, 304 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:58,040 Speaker 1: her sister Christina. Then there's the younger brother John. So 305 00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:01,040 Speaker 1: he's the youngest of three two older sisters. That's a 306 00:14:01,040 --> 00:14:04,280 Speaker 1: lot right there, I'm sure. Then he says, oh, yeah, 307 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:08,720 Speaker 1: Christina and Lauren made me the weirdest food and they 308 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:11,240 Speaker 1: would make me eat it because we were having we 309 00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:13,199 Speaker 1: were having lunch yesterday and I ordered a tuna fish 310 00:14:13,280 --> 00:14:15,160 Speaker 1: sandwich and he goes, Oh, my god, I can't eat 311 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:18,080 Speaker 1: tuna fish. I said, why man, and he goes, because 312 00:14:18,160 --> 00:14:21,440 Speaker 1: my sisters made me. You know, fruit roll ups, right, 313 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:25,000 Speaker 1: they said they put tuna fish in a fruit roll up, 314 00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:27,840 Speaker 1: rolled it up. And then you said they put my 315 00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 1: mom's red sauce on it. I was like, what's that? 316 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,800 Speaker 1: He said, it was with spaghetti sauce, like spaghetti sauce. 317 00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:36,080 Speaker 1: So you put tuna in a fruit roll up, put 318 00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,520 Speaker 1: spaghetti sauce on it, made your brother eat it, and 319 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:42,200 Speaker 1: it made him sick. No shocker there. To this day, 320 00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:44,400 Speaker 1: your brother cannot eat tuna fish because of what you 321 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:44,920 Speaker 1: did to him. 322 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:48,040 Speaker 2: I have never heard this from him. Let me take 323 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:51,720 Speaker 2: this moment to publicly apologize to him for the trauma. 324 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:55,200 Speaker 2: It is wild what we remember from our childhoods and 325 00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:57,720 Speaker 2: other people don't. Of course, I look back on being 326 00:14:57,720 --> 00:15:01,720 Speaker 2: his older sister, and I think all I did was protect. 327 00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:02,400 Speaker 1: Him, imparted wisdom. 328 00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:05,360 Speaker 2: I cooked for him, but never tuna in a fruit 329 00:15:05,440 --> 00:15:07,960 Speaker 2: roll up. I babysat him. Wow. 330 00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:11,400 Speaker 1: Wait wait, I want to stop you. You cooked for him, Well, 331 00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 1: maybe that was a step too far. 332 00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:16,760 Speaker 2: I did. I mean, I mean mac and cheese. I 333 00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:18,720 Speaker 2: remember I would make frozen chicken tenders, but you just 334 00:15:18,720 --> 00:15:20,560 Speaker 2: put those in the oven at three point fifty. 335 00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,000 Speaker 1: So we had a great week and it's it was 336 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 1: a good step. And I think now we're going to 337 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:26,880 Speaker 1: hit the pause button again for a moment because we 338 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,240 Speaker 1: got stuff in your traveling, and then we'll get back 339 00:15:29,280 --> 00:15:29,720 Speaker 1: into it. 340 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:32,640 Speaker 2: This roller coaster keeps on rolling up and down. 341 00:15:33,560 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 1: But something I really wanted to talk about this week 342 00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:40,200 Speaker 1: because we're kind of going through it somewhat. But it's 343 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:44,320 Speaker 1: something that everybody's going back to school and a lot 344 00:15:44,400 --> 00:15:47,000 Speaker 1: of parents friends of ours have their kids going to college. 345 00:15:47,120 --> 00:15:48,760 Speaker 1: We went through this last year. You've gone through this 346 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:54,560 Speaker 1: as a student sorority rush. Sorority recruitment is going on 347 00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:56,760 Speaker 1: right now at a lot of schools, not all schools. 348 00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:59,440 Speaker 1: Some do second semester, some do whatever, but the majority 349 00:15:59,480 --> 00:16:02,520 Speaker 1: of schools going through rush right now. Our daughter Taylor 350 00:16:02,600 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 1: is at TCU. She's now a sophomore. She's a theta, 351 00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:08,000 Speaker 1: so she's on the other side of it. But we 352 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:11,520 Speaker 1: went through it last year. This is something that Lauren 353 00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:15,440 Speaker 1: tried to prepare me for. I was not emotionally prepared. 354 00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 1: I had a son who went through a fraternity rush, 355 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:22,160 Speaker 1: not the same at all. It is the difference between 356 00:16:23,120 --> 00:16:27,400 Speaker 1: I don't know, there's no difference, there's no comparison. So 357 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:30,000 Speaker 1: going through sorty rush and so we're living this now 358 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,440 Speaker 1: with a lot of parents, and it's really taken to 359 00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 1: the internet now because of TikTok. There's the girl from 360 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,680 Speaker 1: Alabama that's tiktoking, that's you know, kind. 361 00:16:38,520 --> 00:16:41,320 Speaker 2: Of last year and then but that one woman's young 362 00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:43,400 Speaker 2: woman started it last year. I don't know if now 363 00:16:43,400 --> 00:16:44,160 Speaker 2: it's still going on here. 364 00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:46,920 Speaker 1: There's a girl on TikTok. I read an article today 365 00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: about a girl that's going through it. She's like, I 366 00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 1: am miserable. It is so blessedly hot, I am exhausted. 367 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:56,400 Speaker 1: I haven't slept rush talk. Yeah, it's a lot. And 368 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:58,160 Speaker 1: so we are going through that with some of our 369 00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:01,800 Speaker 1: friends that are now freshmen, and I just I feel 370 00:17:01,840 --> 00:17:03,320 Speaker 1: for all of you parents out there. 371 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,119 Speaker 2: I think the hardest part about it. Tell me if 372 00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:09,720 Speaker 2: I'm wrong, is that it's one of those situations where 373 00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:13,520 Speaker 2: as a parent there's nothing you can do. You want 374 00:17:13,560 --> 00:17:17,479 Speaker 2: your child to be accepted, to find friends, but you 375 00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:20,879 Speaker 2: have no control in this situation, and your child is 376 00:17:20,920 --> 00:17:25,040 Speaker 2: feeling rejected and feeling hurt and you can't, you can't 377 00:17:25,080 --> 00:17:25,719 Speaker 2: really do anything. 378 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:28,119 Speaker 1: That's a good point because it's kind of the first time. 379 00:17:28,280 --> 00:17:29,879 Speaker 1: You know, first of all, we're letting go for the 380 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:32,040 Speaker 1: first time from high school to college. So you're letting 381 00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:34,200 Speaker 1: go as it is, and you're right into one of 382 00:17:34,240 --> 00:17:37,240 Speaker 1: the worst positions a parent and kid. 383 00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:39,800 Speaker 2: Right off the bat, Yeah, before the school's even started. 384 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,120 Speaker 2: And I've also because we have a few friends who 385 00:17:43,359 --> 00:17:45,240 Speaker 2: their kids are going through this year, and so I'm 386 00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:48,560 Speaker 2: just talking to the moms and counseling them and checking 387 00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:52,280 Speaker 2: in on them, because again, you want this to be 388 00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:55,360 Speaker 2: and I do believe. I mean my sorority sisters, who 389 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:57,280 Speaker 2: are the women I just went on my girls trip with. 390 00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:00,760 Speaker 2: They are my dearest friends in the world eighteen years 391 00:18:00,840 --> 00:18:03,960 Speaker 2: after I went through this recruitment thing myself, and so 392 00:18:04,080 --> 00:18:07,400 Speaker 2: I believe in the process you are going to find friends. 393 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:08,880 Speaker 2: And it's such a great way to make a big 394 00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:11,560 Speaker 2: school feel small and a great way for your daughter 395 00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:14,879 Speaker 2: son to have activities and things going on and stay 396 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:18,400 Speaker 2: busy in a new environment. But no matter what, when 397 00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:22,000 Speaker 2: you're going through recruitment and a house says they don't 398 00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:25,960 Speaker 2: want you, it feels like rejection. And what I try 399 00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:30,560 Speaker 2: to tell our friends about their daughters. Is it's like dating. Actually, 400 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:32,840 Speaker 2: it is like a relationship. It's like figuring it out. 401 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:36,720 Speaker 2: It's a mutual selection process. These girls who are in 402 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:40,400 Speaker 2: the house right now, they are trying to find other 403 00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:43,080 Speaker 2: women who they know will vibe with them, are of 404 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:46,119 Speaker 2: that vibe. And so when they quote unquote you know, 405 00:18:46,280 --> 00:18:50,120 Speaker 2: cut you reject you, it's really just them saying, hey, 406 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:52,560 Speaker 2: you're actually going to be a better fit in another house. 407 00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:55,280 Speaker 2: All the best to you, but we're not the right match. 408 00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:59,600 Speaker 2: And that's why it's a mutual selection process. But probably, 409 00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:02,480 Speaker 2: just like dating, even if you know someone's not for you, 410 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,640 Speaker 2: if they dump you, it still doesn't feel good. 411 00:19:04,960 --> 00:19:08,160 Speaker 1: One thing, I was not knowledgeable about it at all. 412 00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:12,199 Speaker 1: You may know about this. Parents are spending thousands of 413 00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:14,160 Speaker 1: dollars on recruitment coaches. 414 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:19,480 Speaker 2: I've heard about this. I've never seen it. I've never I've. 415 00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:20,920 Speaker 1: Read about this Alabama situation. 416 00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,200 Speaker 2: So I think it happens at more at the southern 417 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,720 Speaker 2: schools because I went to Missoo, which is more like 418 00:19:25,720 --> 00:19:26,560 Speaker 2: a Midwest school. 419 00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:29,080 Speaker 1: So we're talking old miss at Alabama. 420 00:19:29,119 --> 00:19:31,919 Speaker 2: And I wouldn't call TCU, I wouldn't put tc in 421 00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:34,040 Speaker 2: that category. I've never heard of it happening there, but 422 00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:34,520 Speaker 2: maybe it is. 423 00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:38,199 Speaker 1: But people, so what this is parents will pay or 424 00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:41,119 Speaker 1: you know, kids or whatever. Somebody's paying hundreds, if not 425 00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:45,400 Speaker 1: thousands of dollars to kind of put your resume together, 426 00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:49,199 Speaker 1: be saying the right things there were there. They're coaching 427 00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,600 Speaker 1: you up on when you get to campus, what to 428 00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:53,560 Speaker 1: say in recruitment, how to. 429 00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:54,639 Speaker 2: How do you feel about that? 430 00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:58,440 Speaker 1: I think it's I think it's I think it's a 431 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:01,359 Speaker 1: bridge too far. I know parents want to get involved. 432 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:02,919 Speaker 1: I know they want their kids to be happy, But 433 00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,040 Speaker 1: I am a big believer in what you just said. 434 00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:10,560 Speaker 1: Put yourself out there, be who you are. You will 435 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,120 Speaker 1: find your tribe, and I know we are tribal people. 436 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,400 Speaker 1: And you're wanting to belong and you don't know. You're 437 00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:20,520 Speaker 1: seventeen eighteen maybe and you think you want to be 438 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,719 Speaker 1: a tried Delt or a Gamma PI or whatever. That 439 00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:25,320 Speaker 1: may not be the right place for you. And you 440 00:20:25,359 --> 00:20:26,840 Speaker 1: don't know you've only been there a week. 441 00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,960 Speaker 2: Yes, and I've told again many other women this with 442 00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:34,280 Speaker 2: their girls going through the opinion will change throughout the week. 443 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:37,080 Speaker 2: I remember when I went through day I mean I 444 00:20:37,240 --> 00:20:39,159 Speaker 2: was the first person in my family to go to 445 00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:43,439 Speaker 2: a four year university, obviously the first person to go Greek. 446 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:45,760 Speaker 2: So I had no idea what I was in for. 447 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,720 Speaker 2: And then day to day my opinions on the house 448 00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,000 Speaker 2: is totally changed. You know, you feel differently in the 449 00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:52,680 Speaker 2: middle of the week than he did at the beginning. 450 00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:55,840 Speaker 2: By the end of the week, I actually the second 451 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:58,800 Speaker 2: to last day had been cut I think by everywhere 452 00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:05,200 Speaker 2: accept data, and at that time I just felt so rejected. 453 00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,640 Speaker 2: But I thought, well, I did like Theta. I hope 454 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:10,720 Speaker 2: it's right for me. And then I look back and think, well, 455 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,680 Speaker 2: all those other houses cut me because they thought this 456 00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,879 Speaker 2: nerd by the Theta at my school was top and grades, 457 00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:20,760 Speaker 2: this theater girl with her GPA is a Theta. Just 458 00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,480 Speaker 2: go make her a Theta. That's what she needs to 459 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:24,239 Speaker 2: be all the best. So that's what it was. 460 00:21:24,359 --> 00:21:25,639 Speaker 1: They can see that you don't. 461 00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:28,760 Speaker 2: But I went through with I didn't have wreck letters, 462 00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:32,480 Speaker 2: I didn't have anything, and I'm so glad because it 463 00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:36,760 Speaker 2: was my way of just going in raw and finding 464 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:40,159 Speaker 2: my people. And I think when I hear that recruitment 465 00:21:40,200 --> 00:21:43,720 Speaker 2: counselor thing, I think two things. One, I think, well, 466 00:21:43,800 --> 00:21:45,600 Speaker 2: I'm going to judge parents for a second, but by 467 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:48,080 Speaker 2: this point, I feel like your kid, since they're going 468 00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:49,920 Speaker 2: out into the world on their own, you should have 469 00:21:50,080 --> 00:21:52,840 Speaker 2: kind of shown them how to speak to new people. 470 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:55,560 Speaker 2: They should be I'm not saying I was great at 471 00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,080 Speaker 2: it at eighteen, but they should be able to carry 472 00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,920 Speaker 2: on a conversation with a new person. And two, you 473 00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:03,720 Speaker 2: might be setting them up for a situation that isn't 474 00:22:03,760 --> 00:22:06,080 Speaker 2: right for them because of your own pride, because of 475 00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:09,159 Speaker 2: your own fears. It reminds me kind of like the 476 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:12,040 Speaker 2: Varsity Blues thing. 477 00:22:12,520 --> 00:22:13,000 Speaker 1: Handle. 478 00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:16,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, you're you're they're faking their kids tests. Okay, well 479 00:22:16,359 --> 00:22:18,119 Speaker 2: you just got your kid into a school. They're not 480 00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:19,000 Speaker 2: going to be able to handle. 481 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:22,399 Speaker 1: Not everybody needs to go to Harvard, and Harvard's not 482 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,199 Speaker 1: for everybody. You're not going to feel comfortable there, usc 483 00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:28,080 Speaker 1: you name it. I agree, and stories are the same way. 484 00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:30,760 Speaker 1: And we went through this with with our daughter Taylor. 485 00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:34,239 Speaker 1: She got cut by somebody she thought she loved and 486 00:22:34,320 --> 00:22:38,080 Speaker 1: she was pretty devastated. She was a thet girl like same. 487 00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:39,239 Speaker 2: Kind of sty At the end of the week, she 488 00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:43,040 Speaker 2: was totally happy and everybody It's another roller coaster for 489 00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:45,920 Speaker 2: any parents with their kids. Going through recruitment. It is 490 00:22:46,520 --> 00:22:48,600 Speaker 2: that is a roller coaster. You have all my love. 491 00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:51,360 Speaker 2: I wish I could send you a shot of tequila. 492 00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:54,879 Speaker 1: Babe. What I wasn't prepared for? And Lauren tried to 493 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,560 Speaker 1: prepare me for this. I was not prepared. I had 494 00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:00,280 Speaker 1: gone through this with my son. You know, if you 495 00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:02,320 Speaker 1: have a frat boy, you don't you know what it is. 496 00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:04,639 Speaker 2: Maybe it's the difference of and dare I use a 497 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:05,520 Speaker 2: sports analogy? 498 00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:06,560 Speaker 1: Oh, this is good. 499 00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:09,520 Speaker 2: It's the difference of like a pickup game of backyard 500 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:12,280 Speaker 2: football versus you're trying to go and train and get 501 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:12,840 Speaker 2: in the NFL. 502 00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:16,200 Speaker 1: Babe. You just crushed that on every level. Yeah, you're right, 503 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:18,960 Speaker 1: a pickup game, who cares? It's all good. You're playing. 504 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:24,119 Speaker 1: That's playing with your buddies. Hey, Lauren, you want to play? Sure? Cool? 505 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:29,840 Speaker 1: And you know then you flip to dedicating your whole life. 506 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,159 Speaker 1: There is a script, there's a plan, there's rules you 507 00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:36,880 Speaker 1: cannot break. You're right. That is a wow. Can somebody 508 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:40,520 Speaker 1: mark this down in the in the history books. 509 00:23:40,800 --> 00:23:42,600 Speaker 2: I think we will get married. I think we can. 510 00:23:42,800 --> 00:23:45,160 Speaker 1: Yeah. I just fell in love all over again. 511 00:23:45,359 --> 00:23:47,679 Speaker 2: I and another milestone. I was just sitting here soaking, 512 00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:49,560 Speaker 2: and I might play back and listen to you saying 513 00:23:49,600 --> 00:23:51,359 Speaker 2: that I was right and you were wrong. This is 514 00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:51,960 Speaker 2: a great moment. 515 00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:53,879 Speaker 1: They should have listened to me. Dare I say that 516 00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,400 Speaker 1: was a home run of a sports analogy? 517 00:23:56,560 --> 00:23:57,280 Speaker 2: Eh, you lost me. 518 00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:13,000 Speaker 1: Fraternity recruitment is nothing. It is a point one on 519 00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:15,880 Speaker 1: the Richter scale compared to what I was going through 520 00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:18,600 Speaker 1: with my daughter, which I was not emotionally prepared for. 521 00:24:18,680 --> 00:24:21,080 Speaker 1: I'm like, she's fine, she's going to go through it, 522 00:24:21,119 --> 00:24:26,040 Speaker 1: She'll find her people. Oh my god. I had anxiety. 523 00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:29,960 Speaker 1: I wasn't sleeping. I was like leaning on Lauren, tell 524 00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:32,640 Speaker 1: me it's going to be okay. How come nobody prepared 525 00:24:32,640 --> 00:24:35,439 Speaker 1: me for this? What the hell? And I know a 526 00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:37,520 Speaker 1: lot of parents are going through that, especially if it's 527 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:41,840 Speaker 1: your first kid going to school, because if you didn't 528 00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,479 Speaker 1: have that experience and it's your first kid, you have 529 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:46,960 Speaker 1: no idea. So you haven't prepared your kid for this 530 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:50,080 Speaker 1: because they don't know. You don't know. It is like 531 00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:51,879 Speaker 1: being shot out of a cannon. And we have some 532 00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:54,880 Speaker 1: friends who are going through that, and you are amazing. 533 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:57,560 Speaker 1: I want to toot your horn because Lauren every day 534 00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:00,920 Speaker 1: gets up. I see the group tech messages go out 535 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:04,080 Speaker 1: checking on their daughters. How are you guys doing? How 536 00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:06,640 Speaker 1: can I help you? What can I explain to you? 537 00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:10,800 Speaker 1: Because these parents, I know, it's their hair is on fire. 538 00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:12,639 Speaker 1: They have no idea what's going on, and they just 539 00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:14,280 Speaker 1: are gut wrenched. 540 00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:18,679 Speaker 2: Well, it's hard. Again, what is the strongest thing in 541 00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:21,200 Speaker 2: the world of parents love for their child? So if 542 00:25:21,240 --> 00:25:23,399 Speaker 2: you're unfamiliar, like we have one friend who she was 543 00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:25,919 Speaker 2: in a sorority herself, she had an older daughter go 544 00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:27,960 Speaker 2: through so she's a bit more familiar. Then we have 545 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,080 Speaker 2: another friend who is not in a sorority, and this 546 00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:32,480 Speaker 2: is her first child going to college. And I can 547 00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:37,560 Speaker 2: tell she's rightfully, you know, getting maybe a little defensive, 548 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,960 Speaker 2: like no, how could this is like like you almost 549 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,399 Speaker 2: get a little mad at the process. And I try 550 00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,360 Speaker 2: to encourage people again, try to see it differently. It's 551 00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:49,760 Speaker 2: a mutual selection thing. It's like speed dating, you know, 552 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:52,480 Speaker 2: and you can't get upset just because someone might not 553 00:25:52,600 --> 00:25:55,560 Speaker 2: be into you. The next person's coming right down the pipeline. 554 00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:58,679 Speaker 2: But in this case, these are sorority houses. And I 555 00:25:58,800 --> 00:26:02,000 Speaker 2: just believe in it's so much because that's such a 556 00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:04,280 Speaker 2: major part of what people can get out of college. 557 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,760 Speaker 2: You know, I remember reading not long ago that, especially 558 00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:10,240 Speaker 2: with just how much information is out there now and 559 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:13,040 Speaker 2: how much college costs. Of course people are questioning is 560 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:14,960 Speaker 2: college really worth it? And it might not be worth 561 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:19,080 Speaker 2: the value for everybody, but there is I think a 562 00:26:19,080 --> 00:26:21,360 Speaker 2: lot of people send their kids to college for the experience. 563 00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:22,680 Speaker 2: Now it's a growth moment. 564 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:25,560 Speaker 1: It is a growth moment, and I think expanding on 565 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:29,720 Speaker 1: something you were saying, because your mom was a tried 566 00:26:29,760 --> 00:26:32,240 Speaker 1: out at Old miss does not mean you should be 567 00:26:32,240 --> 00:26:35,119 Speaker 1: a tried out at TCU. You know, even at the 568 00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:40,000 Speaker 1: same school. From year to year, these chapters change so much, 569 00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:43,760 Speaker 1: the personality changes. So I think letting go of some 570 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,440 Speaker 1: of that because oh my mom was this, I need 571 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:49,760 Speaker 1: to really love this, that's not necessarily the case. Find 572 00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:52,360 Speaker 1: your people, and that's what you should want for all 573 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:55,160 Speaker 1: of your kids, is go let them find their people 574 00:26:55,200 --> 00:26:57,680 Speaker 1: they feel comfortable with that will love them and they'll 575 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,080 Speaker 1: feel part of that community. It's huge. Obviously. Something else 576 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:06,240 Speaker 1: on social media, the dances have re emerged, the sorority 577 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 1: dances on TikTok and Instagram. 578 00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:09,360 Speaker 2: Of the chanting. 579 00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,840 Speaker 1: The chanting yes, oh yeah, but now it's the dancing right, 580 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:13,359 Speaker 1: you have the four or five girls upfront that do 581 00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,000 Speaker 1: the dance and everyone in the back. It's really funny. 582 00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:18,879 Speaker 2: It blows my mind when I think about all that 583 00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:21,160 Speaker 2: these kids deal with with social media being a part 584 00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:26,159 Speaker 2: of it, because now they sort of present their sorority 585 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,960 Speaker 2: for a full week on social media before the new 586 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:33,360 Speaker 2: potential members even get there, and they have themes and dances, 587 00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:37,720 Speaker 2: and I mean it is the effort is immense. 588 00:27:38,160 --> 00:27:40,760 Speaker 1: When I went to I took Joshua back to TCU. 589 00:27:40,840 --> 00:27:42,800 Speaker 1: He's a senior, so he's not really involved in rush 590 00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,360 Speaker 1: and all that, and so our daughter is and she's 591 00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:46,880 Speaker 1: in the middle of it, and so I was able 592 00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:50,720 Speaker 1: to see her for lunch. She was, you know, sick already, 593 00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:53,600 Speaker 1: you know, kind of had a cold. She hasn't slept, 594 00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:55,520 Speaker 1: She's going through work week trying to do all this 595 00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:58,080 Speaker 1: sorority stuff. And I'm like, man, she because even on 596 00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:00,560 Speaker 1: the other side of it's a lot. 597 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:03,200 Speaker 2: But as you know, maybe they don't know it now, 598 00:28:03,280 --> 00:28:05,919 Speaker 2: but I look back at those moments. The best moments 599 00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:10,359 Speaker 2: with my friends were the overtired, slap happy, We're exhausted, 600 00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:14,880 Speaker 2: but we're in this together, and those moments make friendships. 601 00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:16,920 Speaker 1: What's funny and again you don't know what you don't know? 602 00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:18,480 Speaker 1: And I told her, I said, this is you know, 603 00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:20,560 Speaker 1: this is good for you. It's good to see, like 604 00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:23,639 Speaker 1: what it's like to work NonStop. And it was really 605 00:28:23,640 --> 00:28:25,960 Speaker 1: funny that she's like, you know, good training for what. 606 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,560 Speaker 1: I said, Well, what you're going through. Now, I know 607 00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:31,320 Speaker 1: you think this is working hard. It's not. This is 608 00:28:31,400 --> 00:28:33,400 Speaker 1: not this is not grinding it out. 609 00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:36,680 Speaker 2: And you know, grinding it out is when you're working. 610 00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:40,120 Speaker 2: You know, your first job and you can never leave 611 00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:44,000 Speaker 2: the office, and then you have your first kid, and yeah. 612 00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:45,240 Speaker 1: Do you remember any of your chants or any of 613 00:28:45,320 --> 00:28:48,680 Speaker 1: your things? Of course, can you give us one? No, 614 00:28:50,400 --> 00:28:51,360 Speaker 1: this is no. 615 00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:51,840 Speaker 2: I'm not. 616 00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:58,320 Speaker 1: Our producer. Kendall put me up to that. We tried, Kendall, 617 00:28:58,480 --> 00:28:59,080 Speaker 1: we tried. 618 00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:01,800 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't think anybody wants to hear it. 619 00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,960 Speaker 2: But more so, it's okay. 620 00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:06,480 Speaker 1: That's okay, we'll pass. 621 00:29:06,680 --> 00:29:08,280 Speaker 2: Now, I'll do it. I'll do it. Let's set it out. 622 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:11,960 Speaker 2: The mistake I'm gonna say, I cannot give you these 623 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,720 Speaker 2: secret ones. Okay, oh yes, but I will give you. 624 00:29:15,000 --> 00:29:21,240 Speaker 2: Let's see how much I remember of this. She's got 625 00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:23,719 Speaker 2: one star, two stars, two twin stars. She's a Theta 626 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,520 Speaker 2: to the bone. When you see that girl walking down 627 00:29:26,560 --> 00:29:29,320 Speaker 2: the streets, you better leave that gall alone. She's got 628 00:29:29,360 --> 00:29:32,440 Speaker 2: eyes like sapphire's, teeth like pearls. Gosh o gee. She's 629 00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:34,840 Speaker 2: a Theta girl. She's got one star, two star, two 630 00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:37,080 Speaker 2: twin stars. She's a Theta to the bone. 631 00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:38,320 Speaker 1: Amazing. 632 00:29:38,400 --> 00:29:41,120 Speaker 2: I could keep going, and so remember all of it. 633 00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:46,800 Speaker 1: Kendall just typed yes, exclamation point, excavation point. Well done, Kendall. 634 00:29:47,960 --> 00:29:49,959 Speaker 1: I mean you have a great voice, by the way, 635 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:51,520 Speaker 1: and I've heard you sing before. You have a great 636 00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:52,080 Speaker 1: singing voice. 637 00:29:52,120 --> 00:29:53,960 Speaker 2: I mean, no, thank you for saying that, but you 638 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:57,880 Speaker 2: don't really think it. You're just being nice. Yeah, it's 639 00:29:57,880 --> 00:30:00,479 Speaker 2: actually scary. How much of that I remember? You know? 640 00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:03,560 Speaker 1: I remember there's things all of them, Like I can 641 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:07,600 Speaker 1: recite the Greek alphabet unbelievably fast. They do that alphabet, 642 00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:10,680 Speaker 1: get alphabeta, gambadel to eppslon ata a to a to iota, caapalama, 643 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,360 Speaker 1: moon news iomacron, piratement, tell hoops on like I say, omega, sir, 644 00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:16,360 Speaker 1: I notice the cert at the end, to see it 645 00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:18,480 Speaker 1: three times before the match, burn their fingers or you 646 00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:21,200 Speaker 1: got in trouble the things that come back to us. 647 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:24,720 Speaker 1: But anyway, Uh, the point being for all of this, 648 00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:27,880 Speaker 1: for all the parents whose kids are you know, especially 649 00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:31,520 Speaker 1: your daughters going through sorority rush. Right now, you're not sleeping, 650 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:35,400 Speaker 1: your daughter might be crying. You're talking them off a ledge. Lauren, 651 00:30:35,440 --> 00:30:37,560 Speaker 1: and I feel for you, especially Lauren feels for you. 652 00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:40,040 Speaker 1: She has been there, she knows it. We send you 653 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:44,320 Speaker 1: our love, have grace, have compassion, and just know, at 654 00:30:44,320 --> 00:30:47,640 Speaker 1: the end of the day, they're in college, they're winning, 655 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:50,360 Speaker 1: They're going to be great. They're no matter what they're 656 00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:52,400 Speaker 1: going to do, just fine. They're going to have an 657 00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:56,440 Speaker 1: amazing life, they're getting a higher education. It's all good. 658 00:30:56,640 --> 00:30:58,800 Speaker 2: Well, you got them there, right. My mom would say 659 00:30:58,880 --> 00:31:01,200 Speaker 2: when I remember when my dropped us off at college, 660 00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:03,360 Speaker 2: She's like, Okay, I did my job. I got you 661 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:05,680 Speaker 2: to college. Of course, then I think she realized later 662 00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:08,760 Speaker 2: a parent's job is never over. But I do. I 663 00:31:08,800 --> 00:31:12,240 Speaker 2: think it's such a fun, exciting time for them. And 664 00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 2: I don't know if you have any big advice overall, 665 00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:17,520 Speaker 2: but I just always try to encourage. I tried to 666 00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:19,400 Speaker 2: with my siblings and now I do with your kids, 667 00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:23,400 Speaker 2: to say yes to things. You know, go out, don't 668 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,360 Speaker 2: sit on your couch in your dorm room. Nothing's going 669 00:31:25,440 --> 00:31:27,800 Speaker 2: to happen there. Say hi to people you don't know, 670 00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:30,480 Speaker 2: join in on things because this is a time to 671 00:31:30,640 --> 00:31:33,760 Speaker 2: experience so much that it helps you find out who 672 00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:34,040 Speaker 2: you are. 673 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:39,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, I completely agree, and just drink it all in. 674 00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:41,920 Speaker 1: This is the best time and mean like alcohol. I know, 675 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:44,160 Speaker 1: I don't mean it. I was a figure of speech, 676 00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:48,160 Speaker 1: but yeah, just really enjoy every ounce of it. It 677 00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:52,120 Speaker 1: is such a phenomenal time. Safe travels to you this week. 678 00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:53,880 Speaker 1: I don't know what's going to happen. We're going to 679 00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:57,080 Speaker 1: be a part for a week, but have an amazing 680 00:31:57,120 --> 00:31:58,960 Speaker 1: week and I can't wait to let everybody in on 681 00:31:59,400 --> 00:32:01,040 Speaker 1: what that's going to be like. And thank you all 682 00:32:01,080 --> 00:32:04,320 Speaker 1: for joining us, Thank you for diving in, and again 683 00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:06,520 Speaker 1: for all your kids off to school, all the kids 684 00:32:06,560 --> 00:32:08,760 Speaker 1: there at Sorority Rush. We wish you all the very best, 685 00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:10,880 Speaker 1: and we will talk to you next time because we 686 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:13,720 Speaker 1: got a lot more to talk about. Thanks for listening. 687 00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:16,520 Speaker 1: Follow us on Instagram at the most dramatic pod ever 688 00:32:16,920 --> 00:32:18,720 Speaker 1: and make sure to write us a review and leave 689 00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:21,160 Speaker 1: us five stars. I'll talk to you next time.