Speaker 1: Forever.
Speaker 2: Hello, Oh my god, honnun, we're doing some hime, Marie.
Speaker 2: I love you in the summertime because you're just so free,
Speaker 2: which that's so rude to say, considering we're we've been free.
Speaker 1: But I'm just saying, are we really free?
Speaker 3: Cis I still got these chains on that imagine we
Speaker 3: just like we took a hard left shackles.
Speaker 1: Shackles on my feet.
Speaker 2: No, I'm just saying, you're like so bouncy and happy
Speaker 2: and no makeup.
Speaker 1: And makeup at the time. Yeah, but you're just I
Speaker 1: don't know, it's something else.
Speaker 3: And you can't bounce in a snow boots this, you
Speaker 3: can't bounce in a heavy ass Doc Martin.
Speaker 1: So yeah, well you look light.
Speaker 3: You look light, and you'll look tell me that I
Speaker 3: look blessed, like I'm losing weight.
Speaker 1: I didn't say you're.
Speaker 2: No, your muscles are popping out. Did you look aggressive?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: Thank you?
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 3: I look like myself. Yeah, you look like it. We
Speaker 3: dated you would low ki hit me. It's fine, it's fine,
Speaker 3: you're good.
Speaker 1: Like maybe I choke you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh yeah, not like that room though outside and
Speaker 3: like a like a taco bell wore.
Speaker 1: And they're like that's just what we do at Taco Bell.
Speaker 1: They're like, what kind of sauce do y'all want with this?
Speaker 1: Just mild? Yeah, So well, thank you for that compliment.
Speaker 1: That was nice. I'm trying. Did you give me a
Speaker 1: compliment because I said that you were mean?
Speaker 4: You did?
Speaker 1: You did? Is that why you gave me a complment?
Speaker 2: I see what you posted on the instagram for the
Speaker 2: Unofficial Expert and was.
Speaker 1: Like, who is saying something mean in this picture? Everybody
Speaker 1: said Marie, but they one person. But they love mean.
Speaker 1: They love when Marie is mean. They love it.
Speaker 3: I'm just like, well, what am I? But Sydney, you're
Speaker 3: also mean. I feel like you trying to act like
Speaker 3: you're this, like I'm an angel that you guys love
Speaker 3: to hate. And it's like, no, s you mean too.
Speaker 3: This we bonded over meanness. This is mean, pretty girl
Speaker 3: bs that this podcast. That's the foundation of our friendship
Speaker 3: is the meanness.
Speaker 1: We bonded because you were pretty. And I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: she looked mean, And I was like, I'm gonna talk
Speaker 1: to Regina. George. He's like, that's so nice, that's fine,
Speaker 1: quiet shade.
Speaker 3: Okay, So last episode I felt like I was saying
Speaker 3: too much, and so I want to work on just
Speaker 3: being more selective with my words and information. Then the
Speaker 3: nerve you have, the nerve, the audacity selective. Since I
Speaker 3: did a whole episode I made fun of a dude
Speaker 3: in a wheelchair, I talked about squirting, what was I
Speaker 3: wasn't selective on that episode. I need you to be
Speaker 3: as candid and as messy as you used to be.
Speaker 4: Sis.
Speaker 1: I just don't want to get from episode one want
Speaker 1: to get in trouble. I don't want to get in trouble.
Speaker 5: I was a comment on yesterday's post that they knew
Speaker 5: who you were talking.
Speaker 2: I know, and then I talked to them in the
Speaker 2: DMS and I was like, if you fucking say anything,
Speaker 2: I will come and find you in LA and cut
Speaker 2: you up.
Speaker 1: I didn't say that, but there's that sweet as there's
Speaker 1: that Christian day.
Speaker 2: I will butterfly filay you if you say anything. And
Speaker 2: He's like, you were being I mean, you're saying everything
Speaker 2: you said her social on the podcast.
Speaker 3: I did not you said her social, You said her
Speaker 3: mother's maiden name, everything, all the information that we needed,
Speaker 3: first pet's name, the street that she grew up on.
Speaker 1: You gave us a lot of information.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm gonna stop any hu Marie, what you're an
Speaker 2: expert in this.
Speaker 3: Week because I'm not prepared to go first this so
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go ahead and deflect to you.
Speaker 1: Is that though, is the word deflect?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Sure, so sure? What were you an expert in for?
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 2: I was on the apps this week? Yes, And this
Speaker 2: is strange. This is really I shouldn't be on the
Speaker 2: apps because one, I'm gorgeous and I.
Speaker 3: Mean, sweety sweety honey baby, none of us should be
Speaker 3: should be on the apps, but we are.
Speaker 2: I'm fine as fuck, and it's just it's weird. And
Speaker 2: now I'm seeing why people are not.
Speaker 1: Talking to you.
Speaker 2: Now they're not going to me though. Yo, I'm getting
Speaker 2: curved left and right. I'm just not saying the right thing. Well, Sidney,
Speaker 2: I've seen some of the conversations and it's like, girl, girl,
Speaker 2: I'll be a little more flirty, I'd be a little
Speaker 2: more nasty.
Speaker 1: I'd be a little dirtier, you know what i mean.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, so where do you work?
Speaker 4: Now?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 3: The question you should be asking is how long can
Speaker 3: you hold your breath? Because I'm gonna sit on your
Speaker 3: face these things. And whenever Sidney's greenshot something and sends
Speaker 3: it to me, I'm like, that's what you should how
Speaker 3: you should respond, And it's always something trash.
Speaker 1: But I don't think you're listening to me.
Speaker 2: So what do you like? The comments like, so, what
Speaker 2: are you here for? And I was like, for mutual physicality?
Speaker 2: And and Devin Walker was like.
Speaker 1: Are you an attorney?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: Who the fuck talks like that? Mutual mutual physicality is
Speaker 1: a thing. I don't even know what the hell physicality means.
Speaker 1: It's like us getting active, we're sex.
Speaker 3: Okay, ask me that question, and then I'm gonna answer
Speaker 3: it the way that I've been answering that question.
Speaker 1: Hey, so what are you here for?
Speaker 3: Multiple orgasms? That's how I've been answering that question. Multiple
Speaker 3: or yes physicalitymutual physicality, multiple orgasms, it's synonymous.
Speaker 2: Yea, well, that's why you're living your life and you're
Speaker 2: popping that thing, popping that thigh, popping that.
Speaker 1: Thing like it's your profession.
Speaker 3: Now, I mean says you know, I'm unemployed, so yeah,
Speaker 3: you know, this is what happens when shows get canceled.
Speaker 1: People morph into horse.
Speaker 3: Oh my God, I imagine it, just remembering like Para Rangers,
Speaker 3: they'd like morph into like into.
Speaker 1: Their swords or whatever. I remember sorts anyway. Whatever.
Speaker 3: Imagine if we see you underneath the bridge, just a second,
Speaker 3: indict like it's because of Usler.
Speaker 1: I would never I don't even know where.
Speaker 3: If you don't even know how you get under a
Speaker 3: bridge in New York, it would be like Central Park,
Speaker 3: like a londou like rape bridge.
Speaker 1: Anyway, shut up, Sydney.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know, I'm on here and I'm trying,
Speaker 2: And a lot of people sent me references like other
Speaker 2: apps to go on.
Speaker 1: One of them is called called Gush. One is called no.
Speaker 1: I think that's a party that might be a party
Speaker 1: ooh so lesbian party called Gush.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're gonna go. We're gonna go to that. And
Speaker 2: then I'm on another app called her.
Speaker 3: And it's weird because all these apps just want you
Speaker 3: to pay more money to unlock this other level.
Speaker 2: I'm not paying for someone to talk to me. Are
Speaker 2: you fucking serious? What do I look like a rich dude?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: Absolutely not. I am not that I am.
Speaker 2: Either you're gonna talk to me or I'm not gonna
Speaker 2: find everybody sliding my dms. I feel like the people
Speaker 2: are not sliding my DEMI. Here's here's what we're gonna do, upsetting.
Speaker 3: We're gonna how much is the thing We're gonna We're
Speaker 3: gonna slide some of the Patreon money to you so
Speaker 3: you can get your stella got her groove back on
Speaker 3: for the summer. I'm your WHOOPI Goldberg says, you are
Speaker 3: my Angela Bassett.
Speaker 1: So you're dying of cancer.
Speaker 3: Probably I am shaving my head, shaving my head so
Speaker 3: I will look like I'm done of cancer in a
Speaker 3: couple of weeks.
Speaker 1: Anyway, Marie, Uh, what were you an expert in? Ya?
Speaker 1: What was I an expert in this week? I don't know.
Speaker 3: I really I don't even know how to to that question.
Speaker 3: I don't even know what I did this week. So
Speaker 3: she's unprepared.
Speaker 2: You didn't hook up with anybody, not this week? I
Speaker 2: did not, So you're closing the gap? You know, mind
Speaker 2: the gaps? Is I stankally are the closing doors? I no,
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: I'm I was supposed to see one of the dudes
Speaker 3: and he was like, oh, I'm going to Williamsburg to
Speaker 3: pick something up. He just kept saying pick something up,
Speaker 3: and I was like, what is he picking up?
Speaker 1: Is he a drug child? Drugs? Like a suitcase full
Speaker 1: of money? What are you picking up? And he wouldn't
Speaker 1: tell me, And.
Speaker 2: You should have wrote the problem with this, you not
Speaker 2: picking me up? So okay because she was at home.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I also didn't want I didn't want to
Speaker 3: host that night, like I had just done laundry. I
Speaker 3: hate changing my sheet after I just changed my sheet,
Speaker 3: so like I can't.
Speaker 1: Is there a way to have somebody come to your
Speaker 1: house to hook up? And you'd be like, can we
Speaker 1: just do it on the rug? Like is that a
Speaker 1: thing that people.
Speaker 2: Are Well somebody who hasn't been on the pod yet,
Speaker 2: Cola Scola was telling me about us sex blanket where
Speaker 2: you just throw.
Speaker 1: He did say your sex tarps. Yeah, like you throw
Speaker 1: it down and then you're like you do whatever, you
Speaker 1: throw it down, and then you throw it down, Yeah,
Speaker 1: got it, and then you just fold it up and
Speaker 1: then yeah, oh no, it's like reversible. No, you're an idiot.
Speaker 3: But also I just I feel like you gotta clean.
Speaker 3: I'm still doing laundry. You must have maybe two sex blankets.
Speaker 2: Well, you can get multiple sex blank your sex blankets.
Speaker 2: But I just feel like Marie, we were going so
Speaker 2: high because.
Speaker 3: We can still we got time. Since it's only been
Speaker 3: only a week. It's passed of me not getting my eat,
Speaker 3: prey ho on.
Speaker 1: But you know, I'm still out here. What does it
Speaker 1: feel like? Is it closing up? What is yours? Closed up? Sis?
Speaker 1: It is? It's been a moment for you. It is
Speaker 1: closed up? Okay, send the troops.
Speaker 4: How many troops you need?
Speaker 1: How many people are you looking for? I need a
Speaker 1: whole football team? Wow?
Speaker 3: Speaking of football team, Yeah, our guess today could have
Speaker 3: been a football player.
Speaker 4: Maybe absolutely.
Speaker 2: Honestly, like we are fans, we're friends, friends and fans
Speaker 2: of this next guest, I mean literally doing everything and
Speaker 2: anything that's like next Netflix, Comedy Central affiliated. Right now,
Speaker 2: you're overseeing Jacqueline Novak's one woman show, Get on your knees.
Speaker 1: Get on your knees for that mutual physicality.
Speaker 2: Yes, and I watched it and I was like, Wow,
Speaker 2: I'm inspired to low key give head right now.
Speaker 3: Wait what, No, We'll get into this. Yes, it's so good,
Speaker 3: so yeah.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, but we're not going to talk about all
Speaker 2: of that right now. We're going to talk about therapy
Speaker 2: because he's our therapy expert.
Speaker 1: Yes, give it up.
Speaker 4: Hey for genrely, Hi guys, it always takes me a
Speaker 4: little bit to get comfortable with just the drink and
Speaker 4: the dwink. You know what I mean, the head of
Speaker 4: my own.
Speaker 3: You can sit back in the chair. You see, we're
Speaker 3: talking about, Uh, what the hell? We've talked about football
Speaker 3: team football.
Speaker 1: Team six getting rammed by twelve people. Rammed, you said, rammed, Wow, sitting.
Speaker 4: Oh, the sex blanket is huge. I can I can
Speaker 4: attest you haven't have one? Oh, I have one. It's amazing,
Speaker 4: it really is. I never like whenever I when my
Speaker 4: boyfriend have sex. Yeah we're not and we're not married.
Speaker 4: Whenever whenever live.
Speaker 1: Wow, what kind of Christian day are you?
Speaker 4: I always my instinct right is to I wonder if
Speaker 4: you really pull off the douvet and do it on
Speaker 4: top of the sheets, you know what I mean, like
Speaker 4: like you're in bed. But then but then I know
Speaker 4: when and when we you know, when we got together,
Speaker 4: like he he would always like.
Speaker 1: What he wanted to do it.
Speaker 4: He's protect like to him, it's so common sense, like
Speaker 4: protect the sheets, like because those of the sheets are
Speaker 4: going to be sleeping in Like you don't want to
Speaker 4: have to clean them constantly, you might as well do it.
Speaker 4: To me, It's like the douvet is the thing you
Speaker 4: don't want. You want to watch the douvet once a year.
Speaker 3: Max, Yeah, well I'll watch. I put a dove cover on,
Speaker 3: so I wash my do covers. I mean, because you
Speaker 3: gotta put it on. You got to figure out how
Speaker 3: it's all.
Speaker 2: But in the summertime, I don't even have any of that.
Speaker 2: I don't have that comforter. We just have one sheet
Speaker 2: we have.
Speaker 4: It's hard.
Speaker 1: We don't have an I don't have an a C either.
Speaker 3: I have a fan and I I'll be tucked into
Speaker 3: the douvet.
Speaker 1: No, you must be rolled in it. You must be
Speaker 1: drink that's I'm just dropping pounds sweat. No, I'm not.
Speaker 3: You're sleeping in a puddle when I sleep with the
Speaker 3: fan on medium.
Speaker 1: I don't have a sweaty body. You know it's good.
Speaker 1: Are you sweaty? You're sweaty.
Speaker 4: You're sweaty as hell. And I've always been sweaty.
Speaker 1: When you sleep though, you're just like, yeah, Sydney, you too,
Speaker 1: I'm a sweater.
Speaker 2: I stink too, Like all the toxins, everything that's getting
Speaker 2: else she's Oh, it's like, am I going?
Speaker 1: Am I going through a detox?
Speaker 4: I got to balance that beauty.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, she's pretty, but she smells smell, And I
Speaker 2: didn't realize that until I started.
Speaker 1: I can't even say it. I can't even say it.
Speaker 3: But I smell now, No, I can't contractually cannot say it.
Speaker 3: I got physicality, I cannot, but I smell and it's
Speaker 3: it's fine, I'm gorgeous.
Speaker 1: But anyway, jump something ready to body. Yeah, there we go.
Speaker 2: We got it, John, I just want to can I
Speaker 2: just swoon just for a little bit, like I'll take it,
Speaker 2: like everything about you, Like I remember when I met
Speaker 2: you and you had that turtleneck on.
Speaker 1: It was like love at first turtleneck.
Speaker 4: We really we have a turtle net connection.
Speaker 3: We do crazy y'all just said, you're sweaty and you
Speaker 3: smell and you are like sausaging your bodies into some turtlenecks.
Speaker 4: It's I love the look. I really do.
Speaker 1: It's so weird to see you without one.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I know. And as I was, as I
Speaker 4: was saying off mic, it's I'm trying to stop desexually myself,
Speaker 4: desexualizing myself at every turn. I have hangover brain right now,
Speaker 4: so I'm literally the words are not the brain Jacque whine.
Speaker 4: I got so drunk after the show.
Speaker 1: What do you drink?
Speaker 4: We drink this fucking cocktail that Scott sound like poisons.
Speaker 4: It was like tequila. It's very like it feels so light,
Speaker 4: it goes down so easy with like five of them.
Speaker 4: That's how they and I don't remember paying.
Speaker 1: You don't remember drinking dish.
Speaker 3: You're one of those here's the life of the party
Speaker 3: and you're like, oh, I don't know.
Speaker 1: It's like uber here later.
Speaker 3: Got a dash okay, Sharon it so you right bye,
Speaker 3: like I'll get the next wrap.
Speaker 4: Every time I confirmed via Texas Morning that I did pay, okay,
Speaker 4: but I don't remember paying or getting home.
Speaker 1: That's a good night or a bad night, but that's
Speaker 1: a good knight.
Speaker 4: It was fun.
Speaker 3: When you wear a turtle neck do you wear the
Speaker 3: necklace outside or do you wear it in?
Speaker 1: And had it like leak over.
Speaker 4: The well, I would say like wearing a necklace at
Speaker 4: all is a step closer to not desexualizing myself. So
Speaker 4: I haven't been wearing a necklace over the turtle neck.
Speaker 4: But I'm going when I do turtlenecks, I'm going to
Speaker 4: add a necklace because that's hot to me.
Speaker 2: Okay, wait, but there's a thing that's saying like turtlenecks
Speaker 2: are not sexy.
Speaker 4: But no, I think turtlenecks are sexy. But I think
Speaker 4: there is there's an irony in it when I wear them,
Speaker 4: not when you wear them. You, I've never I never
Speaker 4: got caught a whiff of irony in your.
Speaker 1: Turtle because because there's different types of turtlenecks.
Speaker 3: Right, Sydney's wearing a fitted like a sheer Yes moment
Speaker 3: Plush City is gonna it's basically a bodysuit.
Speaker 1: Yeah right, it's nasty. She's not putting on got sick.
Speaker 4: Exactly.
Speaker 1: Cash Okay, he's rich. Okay, but Unicolor has cashmere turtlenecks. No,
Speaker 1: is that branded? Are they sponsoring? You?
Speaker 3: To his website, John Early slash experts, I.
Speaker 4: Do love unic cloth, though I am wearing uniclose shorts.
Speaker 1: Okay, let's.
Speaker 4: Have the shirt that I got in high school and
Speaker 4: I literally just foun out today has a toothpaste from
Speaker 4: the Drunk Goodness Toothpaste stand, which is impossible to get out.
Speaker 3: When you came in, I thought that was Prince. But
Speaker 3: that's why it's.
Speaker 4: Aggressive. Look what he's doing.
Speaker 1: And then guests magic with the statue of Liberty. He's
Speaker 1: making it disappear. So it's like Freddie.
Speaker 4: Mercury, David Copperfield.
Speaker 2: I was going to say, I was going to say
Speaker 2: David Blaine's father.
Speaker 4: But well, essentially, I mean, yeah, this is a shirt
Speaker 4: I got, you know, in one of those little bins,
Speaker 4: like five dollars bins and Adventuance during high school.
Speaker 1: And then I was like, oh, you were doing vintage
Speaker 1: in high school.
Speaker 4: So aggressively, like so performatively, like oh it's vintage.
Speaker 2: That's how you knew he was going to be a star.
Speaker 2: You know, just like when you're a kid and you're.
Speaker 1: Like, oh no, no, no, I don't do labels. It's like
Speaker 1: what gross?
Speaker 3: I didn't do labels as a kid, But that's because
Speaker 3: my parents were poor, Like Marie, what's that? And it
Speaker 3: was like, well, the only designer stuff I had was
Speaker 3: from Marshalls and it was like, you know, too big
Speaker 3: for me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I couldn't have labels.
Speaker 2: I wanted a pair of Nikes so bad, and my
Speaker 2: auntie and uncle took me to j C. Pennies and
Speaker 2: got me a pair of bikeys. It said bikey's, not nikes,
Speaker 2: And I wore them to school the next day. And
Speaker 2: when I tell you, I cried.
Speaker 1: From start to finish. Was like, is that a big
Speaker 1: I'm saying? Was it a sloper?
Speaker 4: Was anttle curl? Oh?
Speaker 1: No, No, it was just a hard It was a sharp chick.
Speaker 2: It was just a line. It was a line. There
Speaker 2: was no check, there was just the line. And there
Speaker 2: is that a bet?
Speaker 1: Is that a beat? Bikeys? Like they're screaming and lipped.
Speaker 3: I mean, knowing what we know now, you should have
Speaker 3: been You should have been able to flip it, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean, Like it's actually pronounced bike and
Speaker 3: these are from a Korean brand that olah blah blah
Speaker 3: blah blah blah started, you know what I mean. Like now,
Speaker 3: as an adult, you'd be like, no, they're not called bikes.
Speaker 1: They're bikes. Yeah, you don't know bikes.
Speaker 3: But I wish I was that witty when I was
Speaker 3: a kid. None of us, none of us were, except
Speaker 3: for maybe John.
Speaker 4: I wasn't. I was silly, but I was not witty.
Speaker 1: Were you like a class clown?
Speaker 4: I was actually pretty like shy, you know, until it
Speaker 4: was on stage, when it was like ice crossed like
Speaker 4: you know.
Speaker 1: And when did you get on stage?
Speaker 4: Just like literally trying like literally after school, like doing
Speaker 4: sketches like that kind of stuff, and then like and
Speaker 4: then started, you know, in the theater like musicals and
Speaker 4: stuff theater.
Speaker 2: And wait were you in high school and you started
Speaker 2: theater middle school? Middle school?
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 3: You started to his eyes so hard ear least the
Speaker 3: child's even fairly cocaine.
Speaker 4: No, wait, you know what I mean school plays though,
Speaker 4: not so what professional theater.
Speaker 1: No, but it starts there, right, I mean literally it's a.
Speaker 3: Stepping stools, so seriously, yeah, tell well your bang is
Speaker 3: right now that you took it serious of course, like
Speaker 3: he was up there like I have to go over
Speaker 3: my size.
Speaker 1: I don't have time for this science project, miss Cunningham. Right,
Speaker 1: you had f's on everything except theater.
Speaker 4: I remember, well, oh absolutely well I didn't have f's,
Speaker 4: but I remember well geometry, I had a forty A
Speaker 4: forty forty the crucible.
Speaker 1: First of all, it's like it's hard, is it passing sixty?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Oh yeah, I was like fully and I had
Speaker 4: to quit the Crucible. That's sorry, that's what the story iseometry.
Speaker 1: Okay, what is the Crucible about?
Speaker 4: It sounds like it's like Salem Witch Trials.
Speaker 1: You did a play literally in middle school.
Speaker 4: Well that was high school, but it's still that's such
Speaker 4: a like complicated thing that's not fun. High schoolers should
Speaker 4: not be doing that play. It is I mean, our
Speaker 4: poor parents sitting through that chat. But I've always thought that,
Speaker 4: Like that to me is like I don't think I'm
Speaker 4: gonna have kids, but like if I don't have kids,
Speaker 4: like that is the one thing I will really mourn
Speaker 4: is like not seeing my child in place, because can
Speaker 4: you imagine the intimacy with your partner of like watching
Speaker 4: it like like dying laughing.
Speaker 3: Just like getting stone, getting yes, getting high kids. See,
Speaker 3: I don't think that I want to have children either,
Speaker 3: but you saying that makes.
Speaker 4: Me wants even really about the kid. It's really it's
Speaker 4: more about the experience with the partner.
Speaker 3: Just like holding in a laugh, like look, how terrible
Speaker 3: these other kids are compared to our our Angelina.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's.
Speaker 2: What you hope, you hope and pray that you have
Speaker 2: a kid that's super talented. I mean imagine being that
Speaker 2: parent that it's like, oh man, troubled.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but this But in.
Speaker 3: The same way that I ask, do parents know when
Speaker 3: their children are ugly? Do parents know when their kids
Speaker 3: are bad at acting or bad at the thing that
Speaker 3: they because? Or are they in denial? Like whoa, look
Speaker 3: how good she is at her dance recital and she's
Speaker 3: the worst one up there.
Speaker 4: It's probably case by case, but either way, it's sensitive.
Speaker 2: It is sensitive, but it's it's just also that you
Speaker 2: don't want to be honest with the fact because they're
Speaker 2: just like they're kids.
Speaker 1: They're going to grow into something else. This is not
Speaker 1: the end.
Speaker 3: My mother told me when I was trashing my clarinet recital.
Speaker 3: She was like, I don't make me. No, I didn't
Speaker 3: even really play, just like you would like finger it,
Speaker 3: finger it and then just like never blow.
Speaker 1: Which is kind of my brand. You didn't even know.
Speaker 1: I was like, you didn't even try marine. No, I didn't.
Speaker 3: And but you know I had the little case I
Speaker 3: would like wet the red, moisten, the reed. You're all
Speaker 3: about the prep, you're all about the builds up. I
Speaker 3: was like I was like third chair, third like last
Speaker 3: like back back, back row.
Speaker 1: It was bad.
Speaker 4: My mother was like, why did I she told you?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, she was like mm hmm, that's what you've
Speaker 3: been doing with that clarinet that we paid for.
Speaker 4: That Those are expensive. It was percussion in band, So
Speaker 4: you for drunk.
Speaker 1: What did you not do? John? Where did you go
Speaker 1: to school?
Speaker 4: Felt and now music? Yeah? Well no, but this is
Speaker 4: more just like you were required to do some sort
Speaker 4: of performing art like band class, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: Or choir or something, or orchestra orchestra.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, when you guys are not in LA or New York,
Speaker 1: you have to get a skill.
Speaker 3: You know, you have to in New York. I had
Speaker 3: to do that in New York. You didn't have to
Speaker 3: play an instrument in school.
Speaker 4: Wait where did you grow up?
Speaker 1: Okay, you know I'm split.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I was in Oakland, California, and then I was in
Speaker 2: New York and they.
Speaker 1: Don't have band teachers. I had.
Speaker 2: I had a viola when I was I did. I
Speaker 2: did that in elementary school.
Speaker 3: But then when I came to New York, it was
Speaker 3: about like, yes, very was.
Speaker 4: That you being like I'm different the obvious girls put
Speaker 4: the violin. I'm the.
Speaker 2: I was late to picking up and they only had
Speaker 2: a viola left, and they were like, well that's.
Speaker 3: A chat like he's a coat hanger and tiny guitar,
Speaker 3: and I wait, I kept calling it a violin and
Speaker 3: someone was like, no, no, no, well what's the difference.
Speaker 4: It's it's smaller, isn't it like deeper? Yeah, a sexier.
Speaker 4: It's definitely sexier.
Speaker 3: It's not a cellos. It could have been worse. You
Speaker 3: could have got there late and had to play that
Speaker 3: gas cello.
Speaker 1: I would have.
Speaker 2: Actually, I would be better at the stuff that I
Speaker 2: need to do with women if I had a.
Speaker 3: Cello, because yeah, yeah, hey dudes, if you'all fucking failing
Speaker 3: at you know, sex, get you a cello.
Speaker 1: It's good.
Speaker 3: Write up the book, Google how to make her come.
Speaker 3: I feel like that's the thing. Go to a go
Speaker 3: to a man magazine and read that article. Oh they
Speaker 3: don't do that, seventy nine ways to make hard gush.
Speaker 3: They would never.
Speaker 4: Isn't that funny? It's kind of Jacqueline Show, Like it's
Speaker 4: like girls are always like from like age five, are
Speaker 4: getting like how to please your man? But is it?
Speaker 4: There's nothing the other.
Speaker 1: Word literally nothing.
Speaker 4: It's like it's like gay. It's like, want to please
Speaker 4: you a woman? You know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Well, I think you trying to please you, trying to
Speaker 1: make your girl happy.
Speaker 4: That's scared. Say no, it's.
Speaker 1: Gay, dude.
Speaker 3: It's gay to talk about like sex, the communication before sex.
Speaker 1: That's gay.
Speaker 3: But that's why when I find a man that's good
Speaker 3: at sex, I'm like, oh, he read something, he made
Speaker 3: a search.
Speaker 4: You actually feel it's not just some like intuitive thing.
Speaker 4: It's actually like he's doing He's like.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like can you do that? That made you wet? Sitney,
Speaker 1: he's twisting.
Speaker 4: He's sorry that it was great.
Speaker 1: Teach me. I want to learn. She'd be like, get
Speaker 1: off of me, get like like playing a boppit.
Speaker 3: Remember those things it was like boppit, flick it, knock it,
Speaker 3: suck it like that. They should make those for boys
Speaker 3: to learn how to police women.
Speaker 1: That's what a bop it should be.
Speaker 3: It should be stroke it, ask it how it's doing,
Speaker 3: flip it, get her a sandwich, flick it, be rich
Speaker 3: Like that's yeah, don't be poor.
Speaker 4: What do How do you feel like? I'm not shaming
Speaker 4: the people who clearly like learn something or mimicking something
Speaker 4: important because we've all been there. Okay, but there is
Speaker 4: a difference between like the sex that's like where you
Speaker 4: feel where it's just like you feel connected, and then
Speaker 4: the sex where like you feel like they have tricks.
Speaker 4: And I'm not saying one is better, but it is.
Speaker 4: There is something always to me in my head when
Speaker 4: I feel.
Speaker 1: One is usually better though.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, But if.
Speaker 3: You have a connection with somebody, it's less about what
Speaker 3: they know and it's more about y'all together totally you mesh.
Speaker 3: It just works like great, I said, I have to
Speaker 3: have a connection with somebody, open up, your heart is closed.
Speaker 1: You have a fucking i U D in your feelings.
Speaker 1: That's what it is. Yes, you do.
Speaker 4: That's major. Did that just fly out? Yeah?
Speaker 1: It flew out.
Speaker 4: Okay, mark this part in the recording. We have a major,
Speaker 4: major iconic moment right here.
Speaker 1: I U D on your feelings.
Speaker 3: We're gonna make some i u ds and write hashtag
Speaker 3: on official expert on them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, go ahead, guys, it's merched. That's what it is
Speaker 1: on the website.
Speaker 2: Now, she doesn't want to get pregnant with emotions. It's
Speaker 2: fucking I don't want to get pregnant periods yes, I'm not.
Speaker 3: I want to that child's recital and I'm not paying
Speaker 3: for no clarinet.
Speaker 1: John.
Speaker 3: I feel like you're very open, like you're you're definitely
Speaker 3: vocal about how you feel and what you want and
Speaker 3: you and your partner.
Speaker 1: I feel like you would be great in a relationship ship.
Speaker 4: You're gonna make me cry?
Speaker 1: Is it true?
Speaker 4: Well, you know what it is. I do desire intimacy,
Speaker 4: like sometimes to the point of suffocation. Though that's that's
Speaker 4: also part of the problem. It's not like you know,
Speaker 4: it's it's a two way street, like it's it's I
Speaker 4: think it's important to like want intimacy, you know, to
Speaker 4: then get it. But then also if you if, if
Speaker 4: you're if I'm constantly stated like hello, like it's not
Speaker 4: like sometimes to let intimacy happen, you have to like
Speaker 4: kind of back off the.
Speaker 3: Gas like me and oh, I'm just be pressed.
Speaker 1: I'm so pressed. I'm like annoying with it.
Speaker 3: Me too, me too, I'm like intimacy, intimacy into macy.
Speaker 1: John, did you learn that in therapy?
Speaker 4: Wow?
Speaker 1: I know some team here something like it is my
Speaker 1: dad here.
Speaker 3: Okay, wait wait wait before you even answer that, And
Speaker 3: I want to finish giving everybody the visual which David
Speaker 3: Copperfield vintage chee redbear.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 1: But I love a T shirt that is like that,
Speaker 1: like that summer.
Speaker 3: Yes, he's wearing a white okay, not a cream, not
Speaker 3: an eggshell, a white short.
Speaker 1: It's very summer home.
Speaker 2: It's like either I have a summer home or I'm
Speaker 2: on my way to my friends Nancy Myers.
Speaker 4: Yes, it's not kind of white. But it's this the
Speaker 4: I have to tell you my boyfriend he oh wait, no,
Speaker 4: he didn't ship. I was gonna say he tailored through shorts.
Speaker 4: He tailored a lot of my clothes recently. He can sew. Bitch,
Speaker 4: what are some things I need to be work?
Speaker 1: Does he work with or not?
Speaker 4: He saw you at the fund raiser that we did
Speaker 4: a million years ago, and he was in love with you.
Speaker 1: Yes, wait, is that what we got these tattoos?
Speaker 4: No, No, isn't.
Speaker 3: And I hosted a fundraiser for some mothers against.
Speaker 1: Yeah, generally wasn't.
Speaker 3: They were doing tattoos in the back and they were
Speaker 3: charity men, Sydney mestoos. That's forty dollars in the back
Speaker 3: of a tattoos for charity.
Speaker 4: There's a lot of pressures for tops, like it's for charity,
Speaker 4: that's scario.
Speaker 1: They actually were not that nice, but it's fine. I
Speaker 1: was like, it's it's crooked, it's it's a crown.
Speaker 3: I feel like mine is in most of my posts,
Speaker 3: but I hardly ever see Boop Sydney's.
Speaker 1: So we know.
Speaker 3: So we know your boyfriend and he is great at
Speaker 3: tailoring things.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, but what what else were you going to say?
Speaker 4: Oh? I was gonna I thought I I was going
Speaker 4: to say that he too the shorts. He didn't. I
Speaker 4: sent the bell House show. I was like, I want
Speaker 4: them shorter, you know. I was like, I was like,
Speaker 4: I need like performing in like short shorts because it
Speaker 4: feels like there's something kind of like prancy about it,
Speaker 4: you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and people will be like, oh, you're not supposed
Speaker 3: to perform comedy in shorts.
Speaker 1: I love being a stage shorts and or a dress
Speaker 1: and you can really well you are you move, you
Speaker 1: move on stage, you use the hole. He does choreo, choreo. Yes,
Speaker 1: I was gonna say choreography.
Speaker 4: And ride pants and it's like and I have literally
Speaker 4: split pants from like the movement. Wow, So I had
Speaker 4: to I need shorts. I can hike up and so
Speaker 4: I can really.
Speaker 1: Need to see John right now.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna get that. I'm gonna catch a video of you,
Speaker 3: like so the people can see.
Speaker 4: Yes, and then and I'm wearing rubber burk and stocks,
Speaker 4: rubber berks.
Speaker 3: Rubber these are these are not rubber berks. I'm wearing
Speaker 3: the art teacher lesbian classic burk.
Speaker 1: But is she a gay?
Speaker 3: I got these at Buffalo Exchange for thirty dollars. Okay,
Speaker 3: so my birks are thrifted.
Speaker 2: My eyes are burning watching both of your feet being
Speaker 2: the bottle.
Speaker 1: I have Converse and they are white.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you just got the no, honey, I've had them
Speaker 2: for weeks on weeks.
Speaker 1: Yes, but you don't really wear sneakers. It's basically Brandon News.
Speaker 4: I don't.
Speaker 2: It's just weird to see you guys in those because
Speaker 2: it's just like, is that really your brand?
Speaker 1: This is my brand. My brand is comfort. It is
Speaker 1: sweety comfort.
Speaker 4: Sweetie has become more and more of my brand.
Speaker 2: I feel like I could see you like in like
Speaker 2: a sandal that's like couture, like.
Speaker 1: A Jesus John Galliano.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've never done like first. I rarely do sandals
Speaker 4: and when I do like, I'm scared of kind of
Speaker 4: a statement sandal, but I need to move past that.
Speaker 3: You're scared of a statement sandal, make a statement with
Speaker 3: just sandals.
Speaker 1: John. For you, it's like a water park shoot and
Speaker 1: John has Q feet.
Speaker 4: Just to give you the.
Speaker 1: Nail beds very very classy.
Speaker 2: You come from a two parent home, you do classic
Speaker 2: nail yes.
Speaker 4: But I'll tell you what. I didn't learn how to
Speaker 4: clip my nails until all this relationship shut you away.
Speaker 3: You know what, you were just scratching people in the bed,
Speaker 3: which when you were spooning.
Speaker 4: And now I do it truly just to avoid that moment.
Speaker 1: That is, the nails were just like hanging off the shoe.
Speaker 4: They weren't. I wasn't like Curl.
Speaker 1: I was like, are you getting book?
Speaker 4: Curl?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I remember that. I was like, John, that's not That's.
Speaker 4: Not what it is. The thing is this is gross.
Speaker 4: But I don't care. The way that I keep my
Speaker 4: toenail's fingernails down, it's literally just nervously picking them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, me too. I thought you want to say, you
Speaker 1: bite them. I was gonna say, but.
Speaker 4: There is something just like gross up shredding them, but
Speaker 4: especially tonails like absent, Like.
Speaker 1: I saw a dude.
Speaker 3: I saw a dude in public picking at his toes
Speaker 3: two days ago.
Speaker 4: I would never get it was like, shoot, I'm.
Speaker 1: Not better than that up at his I was like sick.
Speaker 4: In New y.
Speaker 3: Yeah, anyway, tost tikto Okay, we do want to talk
Speaker 3: about therapy because that's the name of this episode, so
Speaker 3: we touch on it a little bit and then we
Speaker 3: can go back to not talking about therapy. Yeah, so
Speaker 3: I have never been to therapy, but you guys have
Speaker 3: both been to therapy.
Speaker 1: When did you start going.
Speaker 4: I started going when I was like literally like twenty four,
Speaker 4: so that was two years ago, fifty two, so I'm
Speaker 4: thirty one.
Speaker 1: Were wow, so brave.
Speaker 4: I mean, there's been plenty of time off, but that
Speaker 4: was the first time I went when I because I
Speaker 4: was like, I I just I had always, of course,
Speaker 4: like been interested in the idea, but it seemed kind
Speaker 4: of it's just like it's hard to start anything, you know,
Speaker 4: It's hard to do something for the first time period,
Speaker 4: so like I don't know, I just didn't do it.
Speaker 4: And then and then I literally got to a point
Speaker 4: where I was just like I can't keep it up.
Speaker 4: I cannot keep up, like what's going but this is
Speaker 4: going on, I can't do it, Like I literally.
Speaker 1: Why don't we go to therapy? You said that?
Speaker 4: And I got like a yeah no. I literally just
Speaker 4: was like I'm exhausting myself. I can't do it anymore,
Speaker 4: like whatever I'm you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, So you decided because it was like.
Speaker 4: Some southern shit. It was like some southern like kind
Speaker 4: of people pleasing shit that I you know, you know,
Speaker 4: learned as a kid, and like it just it's like
Speaker 4: every friendship, every relationship, everything was just like a kind
Speaker 4: of repetition of that and like where none of my
Speaker 4: own like feelings were involved. And I was like and
Speaker 4: so and it can really get you into some fucking
Speaker 4: toxic relationships. Yeah, I died relationships, yep.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: And so I was just like I felt like I
Speaker 4: was like kind of walking around balancing these like eight
Speaker 4: toxic relationships.
Speaker 1: At all times, and at twenty four.
Speaker 4: At twenty four, just like all my friendships, like deeply on.
Speaker 1: Twenty four, isn't everything a little bit toxic?
Speaker 4: Totally?
Speaker 1: We eat bad, we drink bad, like everything's true.
Speaker 4: And you're like you're like, yeah, that's true.
Speaker 3: You're like, I'm fine, I'm fine, But you're twenty four.
Speaker 3: You're supposed to be living your life.
Speaker 2: You're not supposed to be having the weight of like
Speaker 2: everything on your shoulders.
Speaker 1: No, I wasn't saying that. I'm saying at twenty four,
Speaker 1: you don't.
Speaker 3: We don't really know anything at twenty four, you're still
Speaker 3: pretty stupid. Yeah you know, yeah, but it sounds like
Speaker 3: you were pretty smart.
Speaker 4: Well who knows, but I mean, I I was just like,
Speaker 4: I really just felt like I was kind of freaking out.
Speaker 3: But then how do you find a therapist? Like is
Speaker 3: there an ask jeeves or something.
Speaker 4: Like where do you use the best thing to do?
Speaker 2: He's twenty four though, when you were still in my parents. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so that was different.
Speaker 4: For like for two years. So that was fucking incredible.
Speaker 2: All of our young folks that are listening to the podcast,
Speaker 2: use your parents and surance.
Speaker 1: Shout out to Star She twenty four. Yeah, get that
Speaker 1: blue Cross blue shield, bitch, what's wrong with you?
Speaker 4: Do?
Speaker 1: Who listen to the podcastn't hold bad?
Speaker 4: I love you. Star She's twenty four.
Speaker 1: Yeah, use that blue cross blue shield. I'm miss it.
Speaker 4: So Maud, I have blue Cross blue shield right now. No,
Speaker 4: I had it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they have the best of the best. Yeah.
Speaker 4: So yeah, so I oh so this is the best
Speaker 4: thing that I feel like you can do is it's
Speaker 4: like who is your smartest, most like insightful friend, Like
Speaker 4: who is the friend that you go to for like
Speaker 4: the long fucking dinners, like the late night like talks,
Speaker 4: talks talks. They have a therapist, sky Yeah, if they
Speaker 4: have a therapist, like you couldn't and they like their therapists,
Speaker 4: you can probably trust their therapists, you know. And I went,
Speaker 4: I like had this teacher that was like that became
Speaker 4: a good friend of mine from college and like she
Speaker 4: was like the smartest woman I knew. And I was
Speaker 4: just like, do you ever go therapy? And she was
Speaker 4: like yes. She was like I like woke up one
Speaker 4: day it was just like debilitating fears, like of death
Speaker 4: just suddenly in her thirties, was like I'm gonna die.
Speaker 4: We're all you know, we're all gonna die, like and
Speaker 4: then like couldn't get out of bed, you know. And
Speaker 4: she was like and this a therapist like so genius
Speaker 4: like helped me through it and like got me out
Speaker 4: of that ship and like and so then I fucking
Speaker 4: went to see her. She just gave your number and
Speaker 4: I went to see her. And then she was my
Speaker 4: therapist for like six years in New York.
Speaker 2: Six years, six years relationship, you crazy beach?
Speaker 1: Did you send her cards on the holidays? Like, did
Speaker 1: y'all go out and get snack?
Speaker 4: I tell you what it is. It does kind of
Speaker 4: get weird because you do you do feel very close
Speaker 4: to the Minnesota point.
Speaker 3: But they know everything about you, but you don't really
Speaker 3: know anything about it.
Speaker 4: And I have gotten little snippets, yeah, like every I'm like,
Speaker 4: it took me a while to she was lesbian because
Speaker 4: she like slipped she said something about like she's like, yeah,
Speaker 4: there is kind of a there's a type of woman
Speaker 4: who like like you know, you'll date them, you know,
Speaker 4: and then and then like I mean it wasn't even
Speaker 4: that explicit, but she's like a type of woman who
Speaker 4: you date like that like is experimenting with homosexuality, but
Speaker 4: they're not really homosexuals.
Speaker 1: Talk about herself truth and you were like I'm gay.
Speaker 1: She was like mm hmm, I meant a man.
Speaker 4: There's a type of man.
Speaker 1: Yes, man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But I think that is truly a perfect relationship
Speaker 2: in terms of when you need to get something you
Speaker 2: don't know that much about them.
Speaker 4: When the boundaries are so clear.
Speaker 2: Yes, And I think that's how I feel when it
Speaker 2: comes to like crushes too. It's like, soon as I
Speaker 2: know too much about you, I don't fucking like you anymore.
Speaker 2: I love the moment, Yeah, I love when it's mysterious.
Speaker 2: So that's the great thing about therapist. You know you
Speaker 2: don't know anything about that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But if I'm gonna be telling somebody all of
Speaker 3: my business, I need to know your business too.
Speaker 4: Well. Sometimes I do want to know something like because
Speaker 4: because it's also like it is my preferred conversational style,
Speaker 4: Like if I'm like talking about something I'm struggling with
Speaker 4: in my life, I like when someone uses their own life, like,
Speaker 4: you know, as an example. You know. And so at
Speaker 4: a certain point, I was like, can you disclose anything
Speaker 4: like at all?
Speaker 1: You asked her that.
Speaker 4: Well, no, because something it's something good, but it's at all.
Speaker 2: It taints things when they say, well, from my personal experience,
Speaker 2: because they're supposed to be impartial.
Speaker 1: Yes, they're supposed to tank it for you, but it
Speaker 1: sounds like it doesn't.
Speaker 4: I kind of wanted it, But I think that just because.
Speaker 1: You want it. It's as a therapist, it's like you
Speaker 1: have to have those boundaries, yes.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and those boundaries are really important and I haven't
Speaker 4: and so so this therapist, God, she fucking helped me
Speaker 4: through that moment, Like I she has. She changed my life,
Speaker 4: She really really did. She changed my life for six years.
Speaker 1: How much of this therapist calls?
Speaker 4: Because I need to know, like, well nothing. At first
Speaker 4: it was like literally fully covered by.
Speaker 2: My parents, right, and I want to kiss your parents
Speaker 2: on the mouth.
Speaker 4: It was funny, God damn. And then it was like
Speaker 4: it was like I would I would go for a
Speaker 4: bunch like like like burn money and then like do
Speaker 4: a little super bill, send it to the insurance. And
Speaker 4: then it was like literally like at a certain like
Speaker 4: twenty five dollars after my SAG insurance.
Speaker 3: We're somebody's sad. Some of us are SAG eligible. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm SAG eligible as well.
Speaker 1: I just don't want to join because I don't want
Speaker 1: to pay them. I don't want to play those baby,
Speaker 1: it's not time. Three thousands. How much does it cost?
Speaker 4: In my mind, it's like nine thousand start SAG. It's
Speaker 4: literally like three thousands, yes, maybe more.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we have the Patreon money when we have three
Speaker 3: do we have six thousand dollars for SAG.
Speaker 5: I thought we were spending on Sydney's.
Speaker 1: We're spending it on Sydney's dating app exactly.
Speaker 4: I went on SAG yesterday yesterday.
Speaker 2: Well, the benefits are whatevs. But the health insurance is
Speaker 2: the health insurance for therapy.
Speaker 3: So I gotta pay three thousand dollars for insurance, is
Speaker 3: what you're telling me. I'd rather just keep living my
Speaker 3: life just hoping I don't get hit by a bike.
Speaker 1: Like That's how I've been living.
Speaker 4: For the less. Well, there's of course, great sliding scale
Speaker 4: some of the like I've I have dear friends who've
Speaker 4: seen like fucking sliding scale therapists for like twenty bucks.
Speaker 2: Ah, sometimes they're not good because listen, I went to
Speaker 2: a slightest scale therapist. Bitch had Tom's on, didn't even
Speaker 2: have her whole foot in the shoe, and.
Speaker 1: It's just like she was walking on the back. It's like,
Speaker 1: boo boo.
Speaker 3: This you're you're wearing slippers pretty much, that's rude.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm telling you, what's bothering me?
Speaker 3: And I can't stop looking at the heel of your foot,
Speaker 3: was it dry?
Speaker 1: Was a dry hill? It just felt like, you're not
Speaker 1: taking this seriously. She had what Tom's is.
Speaker 4: But sometimes those students are taking it more seriously than
Speaker 4: a professional therapist, you know, because they're like they're actually
Speaker 4: like they're invested in a different way. Like sometimes it's
Speaker 4: really good.
Speaker 2: Okay, but people who walk on the back of their shoe,
Speaker 2: it says something about you.
Speaker 3: It's a it's a sense of laziness, okay, but also.
Speaker 2: It's like, oh, you had a long day, but your
Speaker 2: whole day was sitting.
Speaker 1: So it's like, what what are we working with?
Speaker 4: This is a sooth dude. Here's the revolutionary thing about
Speaker 4: therapy for me. Okay, I never knew. I never knew this,
Speaker 4: Like because so this first therapist I had, Susan, who.
Speaker 1: Love Susan is a good therapist?
Speaker 3: Name my therapist Susan, Susan Cheryl something like that, Like
Speaker 3: someone is.
Speaker 1: This my therapist, Susan Miller who also does astrology?
Speaker 4: You know? But yeah, but she, like we immediately developed
Speaker 4: this thing that I just assumed was the therapeutic relationship,
Speaker 4: which was more just kind of me reporting and her listening.
Speaker 4: And so after a while, it kind of became a
Speaker 4: little like mom, are you proud.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, like, because you want to
Speaker 1: get a reaction out.
Speaker 4: Yes, I'm like coming in and be like this is
Speaker 4: going great, and this is going great, and well he
Speaker 4: said he loves me too, you know, and like and
Speaker 4: she was like, you know, like and so and then
Speaker 4: and then I started seeing this new therapist like literally
Speaker 4: she will literally never hear this, like she doesn't even
Speaker 4: know what a podcast is. But I'm like terrified changed
Speaker 4: my life. You changed my life, Susan.
Speaker 1: Sorry Susan.
Speaker 4: But but then this new therapist I saw, he's more
Speaker 4: in this thing. And this is why even if she
Speaker 4: if you do have therapists with heels out of the shoes,
Speaker 4: He's kind of taught me this thing that it's like,
Speaker 4: it's not He's like, it's more about like using the
Speaker 4: relationship with the therapist as like a kind of model
Speaker 4: for like the problems in your real life. So it's
Speaker 4: like my fear of you know, my fear of like
Speaker 4: confrontation or whatever. It's like he's like, you can this
Speaker 4: is the safest possible place for you. He's like, if
Speaker 4: you have if you have a problem with something, and
Speaker 4: I say, he's like, you should tell me, like, what's
Speaker 4: the worst that's gonna happen, Like I'm not because of
Speaker 4: the unbiased Yeah, it's like it's really like it's really
Speaker 4: interesting where he's always like, use this, this can be
Speaker 4: a place to like test shit out.
Speaker 1: You know, just called her on them heels to open mic.
Speaker 2: Huh yeah, we just open mic, in with my fucking
Speaker 2: emotions and.
Speaker 3: Lying my money, okay, Karen, Yeah, cool sounds fun.
Speaker 4: But that's why I'm like if they're bad, like if
Speaker 4: you if you can only afford sliding scale and you
Speaker 4: happen to like land on a bad one, like sometimes
Speaker 4: like it is still useful even if you like I
Speaker 4: don't go them just to be like, well, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: like say what I feel. I'm gonna tell them and
Speaker 4: maybe they'll have something. Maybe something really constructive can come
Speaker 4: out of it.
Speaker 1: And that's my time and that time back to the room.
Speaker 1: That's perfect. I believe in that. That's great.
Speaker 2: But I'm also like, they say that therapists are supposed
Speaker 2: to be unbiased and they're not supposed to be judgmental.
Speaker 1: I don't fucking believe that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're telling people my business when they I haven't
Speaker 3: met a therapist yet, like a therapist that was my friend.
Speaker 2: So I have nothing should go off of. But I
Speaker 2: just don't believe as a human being, I don't care.
Speaker 2: If it is your job to be unbiased, you are
Speaker 2: gonna judge a little bit.
Speaker 4: Well, that's another brilliant thing that this guy said. He
Speaker 4: was like, this, it's an it's an ideal. He was like,
Speaker 4: the kind of like totally unbiased therapist. He's like, it's
Speaker 4: an ideal, Like it is imperfect. He's like, I'm a
Speaker 4: human being. He was like, so I will fuck up.
Speaker 4: And he was like, and we can acknowledge it, you know,
Speaker 4: which I was like shaking. I was like, what do
Speaker 4: you mean? You know? But like it scared me so much.
Speaker 3: How do you go from one person for six years? Yeah, Susan, glorious, Susan.
Speaker 3: I'm assuming his name is something like Kyle.
Speaker 1: Or Bob or something, Robert Jason.
Speaker 4: It's more than you expect.
Speaker 1: It's his name, Davante.
Speaker 4: His name is.
Speaker 1: Davante.
Speaker 4: It's Ray.
Speaker 1: Ray.
Speaker 3: No, that a hang, that's a that's a pal.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's what Ray sounds like. Ray's like, if
Speaker 1: you want to do something to get off you just
Speaker 1: say it to me, baby, I'm here for It's imperfect.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: He's like smoking a cigarette. It's imperfect.
Speaker 4: You know it's not gonna be.
Speaker 1: You know race. He's playing cards on the side. He's like,
Speaker 1: what are you want?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Jack, you want me to do you in? He's
Speaker 3: playing online poker while you're talking to him. He's like, hey,
Speaker 3: dover Nick Nick. He like, just know that it's imperfect.
Speaker 3: Ah damn, I thought I one, like that's Ray. I
Speaker 3: feel like I've never met a man named Ray in
Speaker 3: real life.
Speaker 4: It's it's Ray.
Speaker 1: You're rare, rare, rare.
Speaker 4: You can cut that.
Speaker 1: We keep everything in maybe no and it's no take back,
Speaker 1: no Ray. Okay.
Speaker 3: So the goal is to meet a man named because
Speaker 3: in my mind, rais or sexy or is he Saddy
Speaker 3: the dad from Sister Sister, right?
Speaker 1: I know he's he's kind of hot, yeah, Ray.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But I think there's this thing about therapists that's, even
Speaker 2: if they're not that hot, there's something about them that
Speaker 2: you're like, oh, I'm spending this hour with you. You
Speaker 2: start looking at ship that you weren't looking at before,
Speaker 2: and you're like, well, the hairline is inteme.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, like, wow, look at the ear loves
Speaker 3: is they look soft? Yeah, And it's like, oh he's
Speaker 3: forty five.
Speaker 4: Yeah, what else the good ad? Well, you know, well
Speaker 4: there's a moment too. Also, it's like where you google them?
Speaker 1: Oh never, I've never you googled. Yeah, you gotta google
Speaker 1: read the reviews.
Speaker 4: Noe, well that too, but you can find shit.
Speaker 1: I think that is where you're breaking.
Speaker 4: No, it's fucking bridge. You're not supposed to do. Now.
Speaker 4: I feel like I have I have now the secret
Speaker 4: in the room that I actually like need to acknowledge,
Speaker 4: like a recording to.
Speaker 3: You gotta you have to bring something up that you
Speaker 3: found in his LinkedIn at the next time, like next
Speaker 3: time you're there, you know, oh you know, I know
Speaker 3: you know it because you went to brown but so
Speaker 3: and he's like what.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I'm so scared I'm gonna slip up and
Speaker 4: say like a detail of his life, like how did
Speaker 4: you know that?
Speaker 1: It's like you found his Facebook or so he found
Speaker 1: his Instagram.
Speaker 3: You're like, Ray, that caption is very problematic, but it's fine.
Speaker 3: I guess it was funny. You're like, how was your
Speaker 3: weekend in the Catskills with the dog and stuff like
Speaker 3: I say, I say, bring all that to Ray.
Speaker 4: Ray sounds like he's gonna be cool open Exactly.
Speaker 1: It's twenty nineteen.
Speaker 3: Everyone's googling, Hey, Ray CBA is just like not the
Speaker 3: filter for you, just saying, you know, I would go
Speaker 3: with a lark.
Speaker 1: Lark yes, or in the stories a rio Dejanira.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I didn't know you could filter story.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Really, I'm so behind on stories. You've noticed, I'm sure.
Speaker 3: But stories are I think what saved Instagram.
Speaker 4: Oh exactly, I love stories, but I'm not like I
Speaker 4: still do the fucking like the mark of texts, Like
Speaker 4: how do people do like where it pops up in
Speaker 4: the middle you want to?
Speaker 3: I feel like that's because it's a different like a
Speaker 3: different dad.
Speaker 4: Well, then what about the thing where it moves with.
Speaker 1: Are you fifty five somebody? You don't say that.
Speaker 4: I have such I'm so bad with my story.
Speaker 1: You do it from the computer.
Speaker 2: But but John, we have to be honest with the
Speaker 2: listeners that you are pretty famous, Like you're.
Speaker 3: You're out here, You're a pretty big deal. You're a
Speaker 3: big deal, and you're like modest about it.
Speaker 2: But that's why you're not on Instagram as much because
Speaker 2: you're like busy, you.
Speaker 4: Know, well, you know it's the numbers. Here's what I'll say,
Speaker 4: the number. The reason why my Instagram numbers are high
Speaker 4: is because I think.
Speaker 1: You bought them.
Speaker 3: I knew it, you bought them.
Speaker 1: Heelena Gomez.
Speaker 4: Selena Gomez, I think has some sort of gay like
Speaker 4: publicist because one day I obviously do not know her.
Speaker 4: There's no way she knows me. One day after like
Speaker 4: an ars nova show, she followed me my friend who
Speaker 4: was on the show and ars Nova in the same
Speaker 4: like minute, Selena Selena Gomez. I was like, did not
Speaker 4: just genuinely follow ars Nova?
Speaker 3: Maybe she was at the show, dude, she might have
Speaker 3: been there since you know, she got that little round babyface,
Speaker 3: so and she's very like forgettable looking in real life.
Speaker 1: I'm sure, well she don't have the last.
Speaker 4: Such a good point, Okay, so normal.
Speaker 1: But maybe her assistant went live at the show.
Speaker 3: Yeah maybe and was like you're you got and she
Speaker 3: was just home laughing and following what was that?
Speaker 4: John Guy Joan followed the numbers shocked.
Speaker 5: She was the most followed account for the longest time
Speaker 5: until Kylie, like a few.
Speaker 1: Months ago, until Kylie bought her shut up.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Selena Gum was the most followed account.
Speaker 4: Wow, I didn't know that. Well there you go.
Speaker 1: And how many followers did you get from that?
Speaker 4: Like literally from that, like seventy thousand, like shut the
Speaker 4: fuck up, like just every day. Well that's true when
Speaker 4: when someone.
Speaker 3: Someone with a with a big following follows you, you'll
Speaker 3: get a little bump yeah and follows. But she had
Speaker 3: she was the most followed on Instagram.
Speaker 4: So yeah, seventy I get dms all the time from
Speaker 4: like twelve year olds or like, please show her this
Speaker 4: sign I made thinking that I'm friends with her because
Speaker 4: show So wait.
Speaker 2: How does someone realize that somebody famous is following you?
Speaker 3: Like because they get notificed. They get notification, right, because
Speaker 3: it'll be like so and so like this image like
Speaker 3: that image, and I guess it says who you follow
Speaker 3: when you follow someone new.
Speaker 2: That's dumb, okay, but I'm glad. I'm glad for your
Speaker 2: new I'm just saying follow.
Speaker 5: Yeah, she's only following sixty one accounts she's on.
Speaker 3: I want to count well, Andrew, Andrew, please please confirm
Speaker 3: that John.
Speaker 1: Is one of the sixteen. Not Johnny's stressed out, He's.
Speaker 3: Let's see well what he says, no user, Oh my god.
Speaker 4: Devastated, devastated.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna slide in Selena Gomez DMS and be like, hey,
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is John. Do you need a moment?
Speaker 1: Selena Gomez is the devil.
Speaker 4: It was honestly plateau.
Speaker 3: The follow Okay, this is what John's face. John's face
Speaker 3: after realizing it is so flush.
Speaker 4: I know, I am blushing. I like, I'm gonna be.
Speaker 1: Like, Selena Gomez, why you're not following my friend? No more?
Speaker 1: You're not following my friend no more?
Speaker 3: What? What was the What did did you post something
Speaker 3: that she was like, oh, this doesn't have the.
Speaker 1: Right fil on it.
Speaker 5: She was like to stories, Yeah, she.
Speaker 1: Saw you walking. You posted a story leaving Rays and
Speaker 1: she's like, is he had Ray? And she was like,
Speaker 1: oh no, oh my god, wow wow wow wow wow
Speaker 1: wow wow.
Speaker 3: Well okay, wait, followers come in gust you and with
Speaker 3: therapy you who needs when you have ray?
Speaker 1: Selena? When you have read?
Speaker 4: Wait?
Speaker 1: So how did you find ray in l A?
Speaker 4: Same thing where I moved to l A And I
Speaker 4: was like, who is my And I have this one
Speaker 4: friend who just like literally her advice that makes me
Speaker 4: cry like I love her, like.
Speaker 1: He's emotional friends. Yeah, I'm talking to you, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm having a grade. Yeah, you look great
Speaker 1: on those shorts.
Speaker 3: And you're like sobbing at Trader Joe's and it's just like,
Speaker 3: come on, we can't do this body of I'm gonna
Speaker 3: get some croissants. I'm gonnaive you a minute to get
Speaker 3: yourself together.
Speaker 4: You're coming to the store with you, Marie. That's fully me.
Speaker 4: I go deep in in proper settings. But I asked her.
Speaker 4: I just asked her, and she was like, I saw
Speaker 4: this fucking amazing therapist. He's the best, and she was
Speaker 4: just telling me about him and he sounded great.
Speaker 3: Okay, so what Okay, so attract your Both of your
Speaker 3: therapists have been attractive.
Speaker 4: Okay, Well, Susan, I'm gonna kill myself Like Susan wasn't.
Speaker 4: She wasn't a baddie, but you know, I wasn't like
Speaker 4: you weren't like voiced, Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 1: Wait how old is Susan Susan.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Susan's probably in her like late sixties. Wow.
Speaker 3: Okay, well, Susan, I feel like that's that's what I
Speaker 3: want in a therapist though with somebody with like Asian
Speaker 3: still experience, and I want them to not be too sexy,
Speaker 3: but I don't want them to be ugly. And I
Speaker 3: need them to have good teeth because I can't take
Speaker 3: no advice from somebody who has bad teeth.
Speaker 1: So that's what I'm looking for.
Speaker 2: If I no, let me tell you the people with
Speaker 2: the with the worst like teeth in weird hands they live.
Speaker 1: What's a weird hand?
Speaker 3: They fucking know people would I don't trust people with
Speaker 3: nice hands?
Speaker 1: What's the weird? Like soft?
Speaker 3: Like let me feel your hands. I know you've been
Speaker 3: through some work. His hands are soft though in a while. Also,
Speaker 3: your lifeline is very short, you're going to.
Speaker 4: I have no idea.
Speaker 1: I'm just okay.
Speaker 4: You know what.
Speaker 2: John has soft reasonable, nice hands for New Yorker, but
Speaker 2: he's like living in New York. The fact that I
Speaker 2: could touch the palm and it's like not rough, but it's.
Speaker 1: Something about him like it's been She's like I could
Speaker 1: call me now, but three payments.
Speaker 4: Have what happened? Cleo?
Speaker 3: She died? She died and confirmed and or deny and
Speaker 3: like didn't she die like disgraced?
Speaker 4: Yeah, like didn't she get in trouble.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean she wasn't a real thing. I mean, well,
Speaker 3: but like so she wasn't even a real Jamaica. It
Speaker 3: wasn't even really Jamaica is what it is.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, let's talk about that, John. I feel like
Speaker 2: there's like people who are fraudulent. But what about like
Speaker 2: impostor what is it called syndrome?
Speaker 1: Yeah? What about that? What you mean what does that mean?
Speaker 4: I feel like it's an imposter syndrome, like you're feeling
Speaker 4: about yourself.
Speaker 2: Yes, when you feel like you're a fraud, like you
Speaker 2: don't you don't deserve the things that you're getting.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's like, well, I mean this is
Speaker 4: very related to therapy. Yes, I think it's impossible. Like
Speaker 4: the why being a person is so hard is because
Speaker 4: you can't see yourself, like you cannot you don't know.
Speaker 4: As much as you try to control it, you know,
Speaker 4: as much as you try to like understand what you
Speaker 4: you know, you can't. You You are not privy to
Speaker 4: the conversations that your friends are having about you behind
Speaker 4: your back.
Speaker 1: This is true. I've had moments recently where I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: they're definitely talking about me. Oh, like they definitely.
Speaker 3: Something at me, like because I just I feel like
Speaker 3: I agree with you're saying.
Speaker 1: We don't see how people see us.
Speaker 3: Have you ever seen a picture of yourself and then
Speaker 3: flipped it, like flipped it so you can see what you.
Speaker 1: Actually look like? You know what? Mushrooms?
Speaker 3: Now we're not talking about there's a picture of yourself,
Speaker 3: but you flip because we've only ever seen mirror reflections
Speaker 3: of ourselves or ourselves and photographs.
Speaker 1: But like when you flip your face, it's like this,
Speaker 1: how do you do that? It's weird. I don't know,
Speaker 1: it's weird. How do you do that? You don't like
Speaker 1: you don't look like yourself? Is what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: I'm like, this is what I look like. It's like
Speaker 3: this eye is my good? Like, it's it's weird.
Speaker 1: I need to see this. Where is is this an app?
Speaker 5: I feel like it's something doing picture? Just flip the picture?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 4: The anger?
Speaker 3: Okay, thank you, angry gay sexy tall producer.
Speaker 4: I mean I think that's where I feel like imposter
Speaker 4: syndrome like comes from. Is like you literally like, I mean,
Speaker 4: it's been really interesting. I've been working with Jack on
Speaker 4: the show. I'm not trying to plug. But it's like
Speaker 4: Jacqueline's like she's getting up there every single fucking night
Speaker 4: doing it's an hour and a half.
Speaker 1: Show, Like hour and a half, she's doing it.
Speaker 4: Show.
Speaker 2: It's it's phenomenal because not only is she actually doing
Speaker 2: but all of the words, it's so much.
Speaker 1: Where was the show? How long does it run?
Speaker 4: Till August eighteenth? And there's a room on the streets
Speaker 4: that it's going to be a transferring to a different.
Speaker 3: Theater ours Nova'lena Gomez, But no, but she's been doing
Speaker 3: it every night and like this is the imposter cy
Speaker 3: inter thing.
Speaker 4: It's like it's like she literally it's like she's I know,
Speaker 4: she feels a love from the audience, you know, like
Speaker 4: on some level, but she's still it's like she's inside
Speaker 4: her own body, like she can't see just the obvious
Speaker 4: greatness that like we're all seeing, right, the objective just greatness.
Speaker 3: But that's part of being a performer, right, Like, especially
Speaker 3: if you're doing a show regularly, Yeah, you know what
Speaker 3: it feels like to absolutely kill it, crush it, standing ovation.
Speaker 3: If you get that once, the next time you don't
Speaker 3: get that, you're like, oh, the show was sad time
Speaker 3: right to that to that's the time that you felt
Speaker 3: like you truly killed it. But as a comedian, like
Speaker 3: that's that's what my whole week was was oh wow,
Speaker 3: I need to quit everything I needed.
Speaker 2: But we realized that audiences are so fickle and like
Speaker 2: they're walking in and you don't know what their day was,
Speaker 2: and so you don't know all these people like I
Speaker 2: went on the opening night, and those are people who
Speaker 2: genuinely love everything about there was Sometimes she was saying
Speaker 2: something and she couldn't even finish because they were already
Speaker 2: about to laugh because they're that intuitive to like comedy.
Speaker 2: So you know when you have fans and then you
Speaker 2: know when you have randoms totally and I feel like
Speaker 2: the randoms whatevers, like I'm not here to win you over.
Speaker 1: This is my show.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I do believe in like like I am not
Speaker 4: into this idea like you should be able to perform
Speaker 4: anywhere like do the heart and so and mic it's like, no, no,
Speaker 4: curate your audiences, Like yeah, I've always felt like I
Speaker 4: feel like the open mic thing is so like male,
Speaker 4: it's so like you gotta.
Speaker 3: Fucking suffer man, and the people who are suffering, the
Speaker 3: people who are suffering.
Speaker 1: Most of them are.
Speaker 4: Trash exactly.
Speaker 1: With people and be successful exactly.
Speaker 4: That's a skill. It's not cheap. It's not like like
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 1: It's called self care, okay, And I think.
Speaker 2: More performers need to go to therapy for that because
Speaker 2: I think that's what drives us crazy just every day
Speaker 2: thinking like okay, am I good enough?
Speaker 1: Like what is this?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: How great is that?
Speaker 4: Like?
Speaker 1: Am I as amazing as they're saying?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 1: Are people liars?
Speaker 3: I've seen people say something is good and then tell
Speaker 3: me that it's bad.
Speaker 1: It's like I can't.
Speaker 4: Trust it right. Well, that's and that's what I think.
Speaker 4: That's what therapy provides. It. It provides this like place to
Speaker 4: like actually start to and it takes a while, but
Speaker 4: you kind of start to see yourself more clearly. You
Speaker 4: like come in with the same kind of bullshit every
Speaker 4: week and it's just like it's the same thing that
Speaker 4: kind of like it is like like gnawing at you.
Speaker 4: And then like over time, you keep coming back, you
Speaker 4: keep coming back, and then like you see, you start
Speaker 4: to see the pattern and then you like start to
Speaker 4: make sense of yourself a little more. And then once
Speaker 4: you see the pattern, then you can like dismantle it.
Speaker 4: You know, wow, wow.
Speaker 3: John, you are an advocate for therapy because everything you
Speaker 3: say and I'm like, WHOA, give me Susan's number before
Speaker 3: you get out of here, honestly if you can, because
Speaker 3: because I'm not somebody who's ever been like like therapy, Like, yeah,
Speaker 3: it's normal because it's normal now, but it's not normal
Speaker 3: in my culture, is not normal in my family.
Speaker 1: If I told my mother I was seing a therapy
Speaker 1: she'd be like, why for what?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very it's very trendy now and it's I
Speaker 2: almost am like not saying that we should not be
Speaker 2: pushing therapy, but there's a lot of people who make
Speaker 2: it so that it's like is this like a child latte?
Speaker 6: Now?
Speaker 1: Like why are you unicorn FRAPs?
Speaker 2: Like why are you turning it into like ug boots?
Speaker 2: Like this is not this is something serious. This is
Speaker 2: like people's livelihood. We need it, Like don't tell me
Speaker 2: what's going on in your therapy session and make it
Speaker 2: like a thing.
Speaker 1: It should be separate.
Speaker 4: I think, yeah, well them like the weird like marketing
Speaker 4: around therapy. Yeah, so like sinister Marund just like the
Speaker 4: unicorn it's like it's like it's like it's.
Speaker 1: Like, hey, therapy, everyone should go, but maybe everybody should go.
Speaker 4: But everyone should and it does especially like their needs,
Speaker 4: like with men, like there men need to go to.
Speaker 1: Men need therapy.
Speaker 3: Get Black men also need to go to therapy, and
Speaker 3: they're the ones that are least likely to go.
Speaker 4: I feel like, well, there needs to be models for it.
Speaker 4: Like I feel like, well that was I mean remember
Speaker 4: those like Michael Phelps ads that were going around there
Speaker 4: was like for headspace on posters being like therapy helped
Speaker 4: me a lot for headspace.
Speaker 1: Is that the app?
Speaker 3: I think it's for headspace? He was doing ads for him.
Speaker 3: That's a therapy app.
Speaker 2: That's like meditation and uh therapy, right, I'm not for sure.
Speaker 3: Somebody somebody said an app that you gotta pay for,
Speaker 3: so I don't know, you had to buy it, and
Speaker 3: then you had to buy things in the app, like
Speaker 3: you want to hear what your therapist has to say
Speaker 3: seven dollars.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you're.
Speaker 2: Saying that we have to market it better. So you're
Speaker 2: saying somebody like Beyonce and I go, I go to.
Speaker 3: Susan everybore you kind of like, I love this sh symbol.
Speaker 1: I love I love jay Z, I love Susan, I
Speaker 1: love my cuts, I love you.
Speaker 2: Imagine if Halo was really just about therapy, well.
Speaker 3: She does say, remember those walls I built, baby, they're
Speaker 3: tumbling down.
Speaker 4: That's therapy, exactly exactly. I hope to god she had
Speaker 4: a therapist.
Speaker 1: She wouldn't say anything. I feel like she's one of
Speaker 1: these people that everything is so you know what I mean.
Speaker 4: The idea of like rawness, of like vulnerability is so funny.
Speaker 3: It's funny, like anytime she does a documentary and it's
Speaker 3: like her in front of her mac Book pro camera
Speaker 3: and she's wearing like light makeup and she's like, you know,
Speaker 3: so it's hall you know, to be Beyonce it and
Speaker 3: it's like, yes, it's you know, you're surrounded by people
Speaker 3: who say yes.
Speaker 1: I wonder if she says dumb stuff just so people
Speaker 1: can agree with her. That would be Terris, that would
Speaker 1: be amazing.
Speaker 4: Catch exactly there where she's like in a group of
Speaker 4: her like her like team yes, and.
Speaker 1: She's like, she said, the sky looks green today, and
Speaker 1: everyone's like, yes, it does, Beyonce, and she's like, and
Speaker 1: then can you guys give me a cheeseburger with whooped
Speaker 1: cream on.
Speaker 3: It, and they're like, we already have six of them, right,
Speaker 3: what kind of cream you want to hand hand with?
Speaker 1: Whip? Like like cool cool whip. I think Blue Aby,
Speaker 1: we don't need her anymore.
Speaker 3: And they're like absolutely, just start kicking her ivy in
Speaker 3: the ass. They just like get out of here, SCRAMed,
Speaker 3: and Beyonce is like, look at these idiots.
Speaker 4: Like start incorporating their children their videos.
Speaker 3: I don't know how I feel about that was in
Speaker 3: all the videos now, but we haven't seen the twins
Speaker 3: in any videos yet because there's still babies. Yeah, she
Speaker 3: doesn't want to be that person. She wanted to be
Speaker 3: that person. She is that person because Blue is all
Speaker 3: up and through the video that sidebar, she stole all
Speaker 3: the visual visual so Lunge from so Lunch, from this
Speaker 3: like South African duo.
Speaker 2: It was like the thing the new Yeah, it's like
Speaker 2: there we go that tea Marie piping hot baby.
Speaker 1: It was like trending.
Speaker 3: I mean it wasn't really trending because people were like,
Speaker 3: Beyonce has been giving us these exact visuals, but it's
Speaker 3: side for side, the colors, the outfits, the formations like
Speaker 3: completely copied from this other video, like same exact People
Speaker 3: are like Beyonce inspired them, so technically she did this herself.
Speaker 1: And it's like, wow, so Beyonce is your god. Okay,
Speaker 1: got it? She is to her fans, I got it.
Speaker 4: Kind of a solonge vibe visually from from that news maybe.
Speaker 1: So long and then was like, SI, let me direct
Speaker 1: your videos.
Speaker 2: Maybe someone pulled up, but somebody in the elevator was like,
Speaker 2: give me the visual beat.
Speaker 1: Somebody's ass.
Speaker 3: I mean, but I think that a lot of a
Speaker 3: lot of like bigger name artists will do that. They'll
Speaker 3: steal from people who are who are not as famous.
Speaker 3: It's okay, but they're more avative. That pushes me to
Speaker 3: be more famous.
Speaker 4: There.
Speaker 2: I have to work towards it, Like eventually somebody is
Speaker 2: going to steal from you. It's gonna steal for me,
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna steal from someone else and it's fine.
Speaker 1: It's a circle of life. John, You literally pushed Marie.
Speaker 2: Into therapy and this is what growth around. This is
Speaker 2: a breakthrough, This is this is the this episode of
Speaker 2: the year. Wait, but how much Susan costs? Because we
Speaker 2: need to talk about because.
Speaker 4: I honestly, like she was discounting me by the end there,
Speaker 4: I would be scared to know what.
Speaker 3: John give us our promo code come on Now promo cards,
Speaker 3: early bird promo code John Burley slash early Bird.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you're not going to say she costs three
Speaker 1: hundred dollars.
Speaker 4: No, no, no, she by the end off insurance pre SAG,
Speaker 4: I was paying one hundred dollars per session, which is brutal.
Speaker 1: That's too that's too much.
Speaker 4: Just get early side that was discounted that. But then
Speaker 4: I submitted, you know, retroactively submitted to insurance, and like
Speaker 4: I got like seventy five percent.
Speaker 1: Off twenty five Okay, Marie, work on that.
Speaker 4: You know there are ways, There really are ways around it, Okay.
Speaker 4: But and also I feel like that there is something
Speaker 4: Am I going to therapy at this age? I don't
Speaker 4: want to assume we're the same age.
Speaker 1: I mean, you said thirty one, that's not what Ilse said. Okay,
Speaker 1: Marie's ageless.
Speaker 4: But you're a grown woman, and I feel like you
Speaker 4: can make therapy what you want it to be. Like
Speaker 4: I went like kind of like unformed clay, you know,
Speaker 4: just but I feel like if I went now like
Speaker 4: I'm doing with Ray, I feel like I'm so much
Speaker 4: more like I'm getting what I need out of it.
Speaker 4: I feel like you can do that.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 3: Now with therapy, do I you have to go the
Speaker 3: same day at the same time every time.
Speaker 4: I cannot talk? Is the hangover rains? He knows that
Speaker 4: my schedule is really inconsistent and crazy because you're busy, busy,
Speaker 4: and so I do change the time literally every week.
Speaker 4: And it's fine.
Speaker 1: You're like, hey, can I come now?
Speaker 3: I'm outside on downstairs and Ray's like, what, how did
Speaker 3: you get to my house?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm here and raise already.
Speaker 3: Guy.
Speaker 2: He's got a notebook with a whole bunch of notes
Speaker 2: and it's like, wait, we didn't even.
Speaker 1: Meet up yet. He's like, yeah, I've been. I've been
Speaker 1: doing extra credit for you. Yea extra work. We gotta talk.
Speaker 1: What if you go to therapy and the therapist has like
Speaker 1: a Lisa Frank binder.
Speaker 4: Then you you you pull a rain and you bring.
Speaker 1: It up and you leave because I think it's rude.
Speaker 2: Are you're supposed to be Everything is supposed to be plain, Like,
Speaker 2: you're not supposed to have loud colors on, Like I
Speaker 2: want the room to be you know, neutral.
Speaker 1: I don't need to know their style.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, no, I wanted to be calming and something
Speaker 3: that I'm like, I feel safe in here. But it's like, oh,
Speaker 3: you come in with a lecture, green shoe today.
Speaker 1: Susan, dude, you feel like expressed myself?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Oh bit you you shop it fashion nova now? Oh
Speaker 1: I can't.
Speaker 3: Can my therapist have lashes on or no? She can't
Speaker 3: have no falset, no eyelin or no nothing.
Speaker 1: No eyeline there. Some people need it because then their
Speaker 1: eyes be real. Sunky, shut up. I need a blake,
Speaker 1: a blank slate. That's what I need you to look
Speaker 1: cute and clean.
Speaker 2: John, this has been fantastic. I've learned so much.
Speaker 4: I have both your numbers. Text my ass if you
Speaker 4: want to talk more about therapy.
Speaker 1: Oh, that's why you have my phone number. Can you
Speaker 1: give Selena Gomez.
Speaker 3: More?
Speaker 1: I can't believe County County.
Speaker 3: I can't believe that happened. And you couldn't wait to
Speaker 3: tell you that she didn't follow you no more?
Speaker 4: He was like, actually in their place.
Speaker 1: John, are you gonna texted him like, can you take
Speaker 1: that out? Can you take that out? I just it's
Speaker 1: not my brand.
Speaker 4: The only thing I might ask you to take out
Speaker 4: is me encouraging you to join SAGH.
Speaker 3: Is there anything you want to leave the listeners on
Speaker 3: before we go about anything that we talked about or
Speaker 3: anything that.
Speaker 4: You feel like, Okay, well, I will say that this
Speaker 4: I have a really good metaphor that I didn't make up.
Speaker 4: That is, we can explain the thing I was talking
Speaker 4: about more clearly this okay, So I'm obsessed with this metaphor.
Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm bad with metaphor, And like, if.
Speaker 3: You say there could be one hundred people in the
Speaker 3: room and all of them like you if one if
Speaker 3: you say, I don't know what that is, it's Gaga
Speaker 3: on the.
Speaker 1: Tour for a Star.
Speaker 3: Every single interview, everything she did, she would they were like,
Speaker 3: John Early, I'm disappointed. What do you notice There could
Speaker 3: be a hundred people in a room and.
Speaker 5: If people don't believe in you and only one dozen for.
Speaker 3: Me that there's like there's a video on YouTube of
Speaker 3: somebody that put like a compilation of all that together.
Speaker 1: Bradley.
Speaker 3: Every time she says that, Bradley Cooper acts like he's
Speaker 3: hearing it for the first time.
Speaker 1: And Bradley sucks a mean clit. You know what I
Speaker 1: mean for me to repeat that mean clean clip.
Speaker 3: Put that in your hinge, Bradley sucks a mean clip. No,
Speaker 3: we're putting that on a clutch. It's gonna be a
Speaker 3: tiny clutch with a lot of words on it.
Speaker 1: John, give me that matter.
Speaker 4: My version of that is okay. So imagine a bird
Speaker 4: circling a tree. So like they're like at the bottom
Speaker 4: of the tree and they're circling the edge of the tree,
Speaker 4: and they don't they don't know, like all they're seeing
Speaker 4: is like just this, like these like fucking branches and
Speaker 4: what they're seeing. They're at bottom of the tree, at
Speaker 4: the bottom tree. But they keep circling up the tree,
Speaker 4: and so they keep seeing the branches in the in
Speaker 4: the in the leaves up close, you know, and they
Speaker 4: keep circling, keep circling, circle, keeps me And then by
Speaker 4: the time they get to the top of the tree,
Speaker 4: they've because you know, their birds are so small, sore
Speaker 4: right up against it, they can't see it. But by
Speaker 4: the time they get to top the tree and they've
Speaker 4: circled it so many times, they start to understand the
Speaker 4: pattern of the tree and the shape of the tree.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean. So, and that's when they
Speaker 4: like kind of absorb the knowledge of the trees, circling
Speaker 4: around it over and over and over again. And therapy
Speaker 4: is so good in this way.
Speaker 1: You're where the bird.
Speaker 4: We're the bird the tree.
Speaker 1: No, our problems is the tree worries.
Speaker 4: They're actually both the tree and the bird. Actually, I
Speaker 4: feel like because you're circling yourself through therapy.
Speaker 3: Okay, I think the tree is your issues, right, because
Speaker 3: you're going through your issues. You're like I don't know
Speaker 3: how I get through.
Speaker 4: This or I don't even really know what they are. Yeah.
Speaker 4: But and then but that I feel like is such
Speaker 4: a like healthy way to go through life with all problems,
Speaker 4: and especially with therapy. It's like instead of this kind
Speaker 4: of need for direct understanding immediate like linear.
Speaker 3: Likeeah, because I'm like, if that was a bird that
Speaker 3: was smart, I would just flash straight way right, we're spiraling.
Speaker 4: But yeah, and it's I feel like it's actually kind
Speaker 4: of like really beautiful to be like that's how we
Speaker 4: that's actually how we kind of work as people. We
Speaker 4: don't like immediately understand ourselves. We can't like you actually
Speaker 4: have to kind of like keep looking at yourself from
Speaker 4: different angles.
Speaker 1: Wow, and therapy never.
Speaker 2: A therapist will never give you the answer and you
Speaker 2: have to figure it out on your own.
Speaker 3: They never tell you what to do. They give you
Speaker 3: little pebbles to figure it out.
Speaker 1: I'm paying you one hundred dollars an hour for some pebbles.
Speaker 3: If I'm coming in, I'm like, cis, Yeah, I don't
Speaker 3: know if I like comedy no more.
Speaker 1: I'm going need for you to be like, but you're funny, Marie.
Speaker 1: You should do it until you die.
Speaker 4: Well, they both my therapists have been like pretty damn
Speaker 4: encouraging when they can tell that I need it.
Speaker 2: You know, they can give you encouragement, but they're not
Speaker 2: gonna be like, so this is what's going on with
Speaker 2: me and my boyfriend.
Speaker 1: What do you think.
Speaker 2: They're like, I think we should say that again out
Speaker 2: loud and then break it down. Yeah, and then I'm
Speaker 2: gonna tell you a few things where you're like, oh
Speaker 2: but this, I'm gonna point out a.
Speaker 1: Few things and then you have to figure it on
Speaker 1: your Yeah. So it's basically your scale.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're paying for a friend to not give you
Speaker 2: all of the advice.
Speaker 1: They give you partial advice. I sting like that.
Speaker 3: I could just say the friends that I have now,
Speaker 3: then that's what they give me, partial advice.
Speaker 1: They helped me through things.
Speaker 4: And I don't have to pay that. Yeah, well that's
Speaker 4: I mean, that's what friends.
Speaker 1: A mad time.
Speaker 3: Tell people where they can find you, they'll follow you,
Speaker 3: and they give us your instagrams.
Speaker 1: Tell people listening.
Speaker 4: B E j O H N C E but John
Speaker 4: say the Instagram and Twitter generally dot tumblr dot com.
Speaker 4: And also come see Jacko Novak's Get on Your Knees.
Speaker 3: It's a masterpiece at the Cherry I directed chan char
Speaker 3: Lane Theater until August.
Speaker 4: Eighteenth, eighteen.
Speaker 1: And where what you have coming up in La?
Speaker 3: What shows on television are coming out that people should
Speaker 3: be on a look?
Speaker 4: Have a monthly show that Sydney did so fine?
Speaker 3: Fun talk to Ray, Hey, Ray Ray, come to your shows?
Speaker 1: Imagine he cannot.
Speaker 4: Jacqueline saw her therapist in the audience, her old therapist
Speaker 4: from her twenties, who literally fell asleep during her session.
Speaker 1: That's so rude but also hilarious. Was just sleeping during
Speaker 1: her show?
Speaker 2: A wait, and I'm gonna need the listeners to do
Speaker 2: us a favor. I saw, did y'all do that for
Speaker 2: Jack Jack Knight, I need you all to go to
Speaker 2: Selena Gomez page and put palm trees underneath one of
Speaker 2: her photos for the shadiness.
Speaker 1: The most recent one that she posted.
Speaker 3: When you hear this episode, go to Selena Gomez this
Speaker 3: page the most recent photo she posted, drown it with
Speaker 3: the palm trees shady and then hashtag anofficial expert because
Speaker 3: we need.
Speaker 1: We NEEDHAG Official expert and then just trees B John C.
Speaker 3: John We stand with Bejon, Yeah, we stand with I'm
Speaker 3: with her, I'm with.
Speaker 1: Her, I'm with Ray. Thanks guy, Ray.
Speaker 3: I'm a subscribe and high at us on the patreoon
Speaker 3: and see us every Sunday at the Nitty Factory.
Speaker 4: Yes, plea.
Speaker 1: Bye. Forever.
Speaker 6: This has been a Forever Dog production executive produced by
Speaker 6: Brett Baham, Joe ccilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts,
Speaker 6: please visit Foreverdog Podcasts dot com and subscribe to our
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Speaker 4: Or wherever you get your podcasts.
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