WEBVTT - Ask Us Anything

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<v Speaker 1>regret this. Happy Vibrations, Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Erica and I'm Mela. Happy Wednesday, Happy Wednesday.

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<v Speaker 3>Be it's really Wednesday.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh today is really Wednesday. It is It's someday. How

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<v Speaker 2>are you feeling?

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<v Speaker 3>I feel good? I'm smoking.

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<v Speaker 4>You know.

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<v Speaker 1>We had a little last minute guest cancelation. So in

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<v Speaker 1>good Mom's style and mela Erica style, we scrappy as fuck.

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<v Speaker 1>We just figured some shit out and actually, I think

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<v Speaker 1>this is going to be really cool. I think this

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<v Speaker 1>episode is going to be actually interesting. We've never done

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<v Speaker 1>anything like this before.

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<v Speaker 5>I know.

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<v Speaker 2>Shout out to whoever gave us a suggestion, who was it?

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<v Speaker 2>Because this is this is a good idea.

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<v Speaker 1>So right now we're on live and people are going

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<v Speaker 1>to join the live or type in advice questions so we.

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<v Speaker 2>Can answer them and then you could be a guest

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<v Speaker 2>on the show. Hey, but first Tarot time time, Like

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<v Speaker 2>I'm playing like magic game.

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<v Speaker 3>We pulled this yesterday we did the lovers. Wow, isn't

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<v Speaker 3>that crazy?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it is crazy.

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<v Speaker 3>I've pulled this so many times in the last week.

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<v Speaker 2>You told me that. And also, I uh the deck

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<v Speaker 2>which is the ace cups. Shout out to Mahogany Tarot deck.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the original tarot deck, traditional style, but all the

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<v Speaker 2>images of black people. So yeah, the lovers, what do they?

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<v Speaker 2>What does this mean?

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<v Speaker 1>It's usually about success, It's about I think it's partnership,

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<v Speaker 1>partnership success. I even think it's travel.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, travel and travel and before that Ace of Cups

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<v Speaker 2>fell out. And usually I don't really know a lot

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<v Speaker 2>about the other like I know more about like I

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<v Speaker 2>don't know. I think the a ace is usually the beginning.

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<v Speaker 2>How about this and cups? Oh, your phone is working

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<v Speaker 2>and cups are for emotions. So it's the beginning of

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<v Speaker 2>something new and bountiful, abundant. There's travel, and there's love.

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<v Speaker 2>There's partnership, strength and partnership.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, love, new relationships, compassion, creativity. So with the Ace

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<v Speaker 1>of Cups, divine love and compassion are pouring through you.

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<v Speaker 1>You are a vessel for deep spiritual love from the universe,

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<v Speaker 1>and you can't help but let the love flow through

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<v Speaker 1>you and into the world. You receive love, you give love,

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<v Speaker 1>You are love. Your heart overflows. Now is the perfect

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<v Speaker 1>time for you to open your heart and experience the

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<v Speaker 1>rich flow of emotion available to you. Right now, you

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<v Speaker 1>are more receptive to creative opportunities, loving connections, and deep

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<v Speaker 1>compassion for other living beings. As with all aces and tarots,

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<v Speaker 1>this card comes as an invitation.

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<v Speaker 2>Will you take it?

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<v Speaker 3>Will you say yes yes to divine love and compassion?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes? I will?

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<v Speaker 3>And will you run with it?

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<v Speaker 2>I will? I'm running fast.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Well, because the ace of cups carries the potential

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<v Speaker 1>for spiritual and emotional fulfillment, but only if you embrace

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<v Speaker 1>it with an open heart.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm opening my heart.

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<v Speaker 3>Hmm.

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<v Speaker 2>That was beautiful. Wow, look at that. Look at God?

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<v Speaker 2>So oh. Also, we have an affirmation? Right?

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<v Speaker 3>What is affirmation?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not I'm just saying it's aff like job, I

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<v Speaker 2>can think of one. Does anyone else have affirmation? Hmm? Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>the affirmation is going? Is I have it? Okay?

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<v Speaker 1>I am open to divine love in whatever shape or

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<v Speaker 1>form it takes.

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<v Speaker 2>I am open to divine love in whatever shape or

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<v Speaker 2>form it takes. Because I was like, I am healthy,

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<v Speaker 2>I am wealthy, I.

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<v Speaker 1>Am rich, I am abbit and and I'm not gonna

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<v Speaker 1>take ya shit. I mean, I was listening to that

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<v Speaker 1>in the other car the other day with Iri in

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<v Speaker 1>the car and she's like, Mommy, who is this? And

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<v Speaker 1>I said, baby Tait.

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<v Speaker 2>Not so serious, baby Tait.

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<v Speaker 3>And she was like, who was like baby Tait? She's

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<v Speaker 3>like baby fake.

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, no, Tate, and.

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<v Speaker 3>She's like, I like this song. I was like, I know,

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<v Speaker 3>I know, I wouldn't even be mad if you said

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<v Speaker 3>bitch in this song.

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<v Speaker 2>I really, I really, if they cursed doing good songs,

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<v Speaker 2>I could turn.

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<v Speaker 1>My daughter is so good. She literally knows you're every word.

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<v Speaker 1>Like no, she was cursing.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, I reason one. I'd be like, first of all,

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<v Speaker 2>she knows all the lyrics. She don't even know all

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<v Speaker 2>the lyrics. I don't know how she even knows these words.

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<v Speaker 2>Second ball, she'd be saying the words I've been listening

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<v Speaker 2>and they don't think, they don't think I'm paying attention.

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<v Speaker 1>She even taught Luna that in the Savage song, the

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<v Speaker 1>Savage remix song, instead of saying like bitch.

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<v Speaker 3>You say chick. Oh no, the doja cat? Uh, what's

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<v Speaker 3>the ship? The sweety best friend, she had.

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<v Speaker 2>A real bad chick. She did because Lunash she was

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<v Speaker 2>saying ratchet and all the other ones. Oh my goodness,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm like, wow, are we doing? Am I my god?

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<v Speaker 2>Nursed those all the Hucci songs. Shit, yeah, I'm a savage,

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<v Speaker 2>classy bougie ratchet Like wow, I'm really I hope she's

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<v Speaker 2>singing this at her very white school.

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<v Speaker 6>She is.

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<v Speaker 2>Those kids are singing it too, for sure. Oh my god.

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<v Speaker 2>Speaking of that, there's did I tell you this? There's

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<v Speaker 2>always Like, So Luna goes to the elementary school that

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<v Speaker 2>I went to, and it's in a predominantly like white area,

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<v Speaker 2>and it's always been white, even when I was in

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<v Speaker 2>fucking kindergarten. So there is this dad who's always he's

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<v Speaker 2>always in a tesla and he's always jamming his rap

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<v Speaker 2>music specifically, it's like, yeah, I think it's like I'm

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<v Speaker 2>a Savage or like a very like female rap ratchet song.

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<v Speaker 2>It's always the same song.

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<v Speaker 3>He's always the same song.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he's always jamming to it in the line for

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<v Speaker 2>school on Ventura. I've seen him also on Ventura. So

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<v Speaker 2>you know a couple of times I'll stop as I'm

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<v Speaker 2>walking up the hill and like, oh, yeah, we see you,

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<v Speaker 2>you know type of thing. And so the other day

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<v Speaker 2>he was doing it again, as he daily does. He's

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<v Speaker 2>in a good mood and you should see his son's face.

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<v Speaker 2>The sun is pissed. So me and Luna are walking

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<v Speaker 2>down and I see I hear overhear some other parents like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh my gosh, like he's fifteen. He does this every

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<v Speaker 2>like I know, every time, like he's fifteen. And I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, these stuffy ass, fuck ass bored ass parents

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<v Speaker 2>hating on my nag came in the car car having

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<v Speaker 2>fun every day. So again, after I heard them talking

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<v Speaker 2>shit halfway pointing through, I looked over and I, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>just broke it down a little bit in the street

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<v Speaker 2>to shout him out and kept it moving. I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>what I have told Lynna was like what I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>those parents are fucking haters.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, hey, do I sound with some haters? I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>but low key, Irin. She makes me turn on my

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<v Speaker 1>music when I pull into her school. I'm pretty sure

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<v Speaker 1>her dad does this abrasively when he pulls in, like

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<v Speaker 1>is blasting his music when he's pulling into the school.

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<v Speaker 1>So when we pull in, she's like, Mommy, can you can.

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<v Speaker 3>You lower the fuck? Can you lower it?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, we're listening to Run the World. What the

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<v Speaker 1>fuck it's Beyonce. We were just like going crazy and

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<v Speaker 1>she's like, can you please lower it?

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<v Speaker 3>So I do because I don't want to be that.

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<v Speaker 1>I also noticed how she kisses me before we get

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<v Speaker 1>to the mitigation. She looked around the other day. Wow, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>she looked a fucking around and was like, the disrespect.

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<v Speaker 3>What the fuck?

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<v Speaker 2>The disrespect? Damn, Like, you bring people into the world.

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<v Speaker 2>You feed them every day, you close them, you put

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<v Speaker 2>a roof over their head, and they're just like, fuck,

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<v Speaker 2>you don't kiss me in front of people. Came out

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<v Speaker 2>of your vagina. Don't need to do much more and relax.

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<v Speaker 3>We love our kids.

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<v Speaker 2>I too. I just want her to love me.

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<v Speaker 6>Pa.

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<v Speaker 1>I know today I gave me a foot massage in

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<v Speaker 1>the morning. She woke up before me. I was like, what, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>it was like actually, she Oh my god, she like

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<v Speaker 1>really took care of me today. She woke up before me,

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<v Speaker 1>which was crazy. She woke up at six fifteen. I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, she was like, Mom from the other room.

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<v Speaker 3>That's all I hear. Mom.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, irie, she comes in and then she cuddles me,

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<v Speaker 1>and then she.

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<v Speaker 3>Massaged my toes. Oh so nice. I'm gonna cracked each

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<v Speaker 3>and every one of them.

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<v Speaker 2>That's so kind. I'm not going to teach you know

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<v Speaker 2>how to do that. Wake up early, set it along,

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<v Speaker 2>wake mama up. Oh my goodness.

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<v Speaker 3>So we have some questions here.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, are we gonna let people dial in or are

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<v Speaker 2>we gonna answer I don't know.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean we can we can start with the dial in.

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<v Speaker 1>Someone asked, like, what's the best way to break up

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<v Speaker 1>with someone text And I'm just.

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<v Speaker 2>Kidding, joking, ghost, don't say shit, break up with them

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<v Speaker 2>in your head.

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<v Speaker 3>They'll get it. They'll get it eventually.

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<v Speaker 2>That's a total joke. I would just say, yeah, to

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<v Speaker 2>do it, that's into it. But to do it, you

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<v Speaker 2>know it will help. Longer you wait, the harder it's

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<v Speaker 2>gonna be. Just be honest. I know that's the worst advice.

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<v Speaker 2>I hate that advice, but just be honest. I'm bored.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I mean, I broke up with someone.

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<v Speaker 1>I guess, like it's been almost a year and a

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<v Speaker 1>half now, and it was like, we went for a walk.

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<v Speaker 3>I went to his house. I said we should go

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<v Speaker 3>for a walk. He walked down the stairs. He was

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<v Speaker 3>like trying his best. I knew it was coming.

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<v Speaker 2>He was trying his best.

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<v Speaker 3>One my favorite opening.

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<v Speaker 1>Every door, maslaging my neck and ship, yeah, your favorite,

0:10:30.679 --> 0:10:35.040
<v Speaker 1>your fellow cancer. Yeah, and yeah, we just you know,

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<v Speaker 1>we talked about everything that had been going on in

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<v Speaker 1>the relationship, which was a lot of bullshit, a lot,

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<v Speaker 1>and I was just like, you know, I just yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>just with all that said, it's not gonna work. It's

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<v Speaker 1>not it's not working. That's all you can say it's

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<v Speaker 1>not working, this isn't serving me anymore. That's literally what

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<v Speaker 1>I said. I was like, this doesn't serve me anymore.

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<v Speaker 1>It doesn't feel good to me anymore when I you know,

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<v Speaker 1>when we talk, it doesn't feel like we're hearing one another.

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<v Speaker 1>We've tried everything. I feel like we've really given it

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<v Speaker 1>a chance. We went to therapy, my nigga, no therapy America.

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<v Speaker 2>Had a six month relationship.

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<v Speaker 6>And.

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<v Speaker 3>Three months into the six month relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>Bitch, bless your heart, I bless your heart, my love,

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<v Speaker 2>I love you.

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<v Speaker 3>Look, can't nobody tell me? I didn't try.

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<v Speaker 2>I imagine being her friend, like uh huh, super normal.

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<v Speaker 3>Even my therapist was like, you know, this isn't normal.

0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:37.880
<v Speaker 1>I was like, if the therapist is telling you, why

0:11:37.920 --> 0:11:41.240
<v Speaker 1>the fuck are you here, bitch? Like if your therapist

0:11:41.280 --> 0:11:44.719
<v Speaker 1>is passing you post it notes, run.

0:11:44.559 --> 0:11:47.160
<v Speaker 2>Bless our therapist. Oh my god.

0:11:47.640 --> 0:11:48.040
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:11:48.080 --> 0:11:51.240
<v Speaker 1>So but yeah that was my breakup, and yeah, I

0:11:51.360 --> 0:11:53.000
<v Speaker 1>was just like, this isn't serving me and you anymore.

0:11:53.040 --> 0:11:53.760
<v Speaker 3>Doesn't feel good.

0:11:53.800 --> 0:11:56.320
<v Speaker 1>And of course niggas will try to push back, but

0:11:56.360 --> 0:11:58.920
<v Speaker 1>you just have to really have the boundaries and leave immediately,

0:11:59.360 --> 0:12:01.160
<v Speaker 1>don't around and try to be.

0:12:01.120 --> 0:12:02.720
<v Speaker 3>Like, well, now that we're broken up, we can just

0:12:02.760 --> 0:12:03.760
<v Speaker 3>like be friends.

0:12:03.520 --> 0:12:07.240
<v Speaker 1>Right, No, go flee and don't talk for at least

0:12:07.360 --> 0:12:08.280
<v Speaker 1>forty five days.

0:12:09.800 --> 0:12:10.480
<v Speaker 3>That's my advice.

0:12:11.640 --> 0:12:12.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's great advice.

0:12:13.760 --> 0:12:16.520
<v Speaker 1>Also, block each other on Instagram so you don't go

0:12:16.600 --> 0:12:19.679
<v Speaker 1>stock each other's shit. Still gonna happen now you have to,

0:12:19.720 --> 0:12:21.200
<v Speaker 1>can't You can't do it if you really want to

0:12:21.240 --> 0:12:21.840
<v Speaker 1>be broken up.

0:12:22.120 --> 0:12:25.959
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, is that what.

0:12:25.920 --> 0:12:30.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm doing wrong? I okay, maybe I stock a little bit,

0:12:30.240 --> 0:12:31.560
<v Speaker 2>not that I care. I just want to see this.

0:12:31.679 --> 0:12:34.240
<v Speaker 2>I don't care. I'm just looking. I'm just looking. La

0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:36.560
<v Speaker 2>la la la la la la.

0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:39.960
<v Speaker 3>Don't care at all.

0:12:43.280 --> 0:12:46.760
<v Speaker 2>Oh mg, oh my god. The last time I called

0:12:46.760 --> 0:12:48.480
<v Speaker 2>myself stalking someone. First of all, I know I'm a

0:12:48.480 --> 0:12:52.200
<v Speaker 2>stalker because the page is generally always private, but sometimes

0:12:52.240 --> 0:12:54.520
<v Speaker 2>I'll just check to see maybe I forgot public. And

0:12:55.200 --> 0:12:58.480
<v Speaker 2>this was obviously super intentional for me. And I looked

0:12:58.520 --> 0:12:59.880
<v Speaker 2>over there, and I looked at the stories because I

0:12:59.880 --> 0:13:01.560
<v Speaker 2>mean crazier and I don't I didn't even do it

0:13:01.559 --> 0:13:04.640
<v Speaker 2>from a private like a secret page. It was my page,

0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:08.080
<v Speaker 2>and he was like posting another girl. And it was

0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:12.320
<v Speaker 2>really soon after we had well, I would even break up.

0:13:12.360 --> 0:13:18.040
<v Speaker 2>He just left and never came back. That sounds so sad, baby,

0:13:18.200 --> 0:13:20.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, I'm said it was really sad. I

0:13:20.640 --> 0:13:23.600
<v Speaker 2>just said, get the fuck out, but and he did

0:13:23.640 --> 0:13:29.040
<v Speaker 2>and then he never called me again. Wow, it was sad.

0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:31.080
<v Speaker 2>I'm kind of sad about it. Anyway. I went to

0:13:31.080 --> 0:13:33.840
<v Speaker 2>go stock over there and he's posting another bitch and

0:13:33.880 --> 0:13:36.200
<v Speaker 2>I was like, yeah, this is what my bitch ass gets.

0:13:39.600 --> 0:13:41.400
<v Speaker 3>Not well, my bitch askets.

0:13:41.800 --> 0:13:45.040
<v Speaker 2>That's how I felt, like, Wow, like it was so intentional.

0:13:45.240 --> 0:13:46.840
<v Speaker 3>Well yeah, I mean it was.

0:13:46.760 --> 0:13:51.280
<v Speaker 2>Like, I'm so happy with you. You make me breathe. Oh,

0:13:51.280 --> 0:13:54.320
<v Speaker 2>like how we were just together two weeks ago, That's

0:13:54.320 --> 0:13:57.920
<v Speaker 2>what it said. It was like you, It's like, I'm

0:13:57.920 --> 0:14:00.360
<v Speaker 2>the happiest you. I'm at my happiest when i'm with you.

0:14:00.480 --> 0:14:02.800
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, but you're just with me for a year.

0:14:03.000 --> 0:14:04.840
<v Speaker 3>Poor girl, she's just a pawn.

0:14:05.080 --> 0:14:06.760
<v Speaker 2>I think it was like even an old video. I

0:14:06.760 --> 0:14:08.040
<v Speaker 2>don't even think it was a recent.

0:14:09.440 --> 0:14:12.640
<v Speaker 1>Videos to bring out of the like when they need

0:14:12.679 --> 0:14:14.760
<v Speaker 1>to like pull some shit out to make someone jealous

0:14:14.800 --> 0:14:16.880
<v Speaker 1>or believe they didn't get beat up, they do that.

0:14:17.240 --> 0:14:18.760
<v Speaker 3>It's crazy for sure.

0:14:20.800 --> 0:14:22.840
<v Speaker 2>So those are two different ways to break up, but

0:14:22.920 --> 0:14:26.080
<v Speaker 2>I hope you can use one of them, probably ericas

0:14:28.080 --> 0:14:31.760
<v Speaker 2>that was a good one. Any other questions you might.

0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:33.840
<v Speaker 3>Have some questions? Oh, we do we have questions in there.

0:14:34.040 --> 0:14:36.960
<v Speaker 3>Oh oh, and we have a request someone wants to

0:14:36.960 --> 0:14:37.280
<v Speaker 3>come in.

0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:38.000
<v Speaker 2>Hi.

0:14:38.680 --> 0:14:42.520
<v Speaker 1>Hi, You guys have a beautiful ah way, thank you?

0:14:42.920 --> 0:14:43.520
<v Speaker 2>So are you?

0:14:44.680 --> 0:14:45.880
<v Speaker 4>Thank you?

0:14:45.920 --> 0:14:48.280
<v Speaker 2>What's your advice question? What's your name?

0:14:49.120 --> 0:14:49.240
<v Speaker 6>Oh?

0:14:49.360 --> 0:14:51.400
<v Speaker 2>Janay right, what's your advice question? Jennay?

0:14:52.480 --> 0:14:56.840
<v Speaker 7>So I am really like going through it as far

0:14:56.880 --> 0:14:58.320
<v Speaker 7>as making a huge life.

0:14:58.200 --> 0:14:59.920
<v Speaker 4>Decision, and I need your.

0:15:02.320 --> 0:15:05.880
<v Speaker 7>So my background has always been in like the business

0:15:05.920 --> 0:15:09.360
<v Speaker 7>side of health care, but I've also done like production stuff,

0:15:09.560 --> 0:15:12.120
<v Speaker 7>like production assistant camera.

0:15:11.800 --> 0:15:12.760
<v Speaker 4>Work, stuff like that.

0:15:13.760 --> 0:15:18.560
<v Speaker 7>And so even though our mayor sucks, they launched this

0:15:19.400 --> 0:15:22.760
<v Speaker 7>like film workshop.

0:15:22.880 --> 0:15:24.160
<v Speaker 4>And they didn't pick me.

0:15:24.360 --> 0:15:26.120
<v Speaker 7>I wanted to be in the camera department and they

0:15:26.160 --> 0:15:30.480
<v Speaker 7>didn't pick me, and I was devastated about it because

0:15:30.480 --> 0:15:35.640
<v Speaker 7>it's something I really wanted to I don't do monotony.

0:15:35.320 --> 0:15:36.800
<v Speaker 4>Very well as far as schedule.

0:15:38.200 --> 0:15:41.160
<v Speaker 7>So I'm kind of at a cross because we're still

0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:45.040
<v Speaker 7>in this pandemic bullshit, and I'm just like trying to

0:15:45.040 --> 0:15:49.960
<v Speaker 7>figure out, Okay, should I go back to old faithful

0:15:50.160 --> 0:15:54.600
<v Speaker 7>and work at health care job and you know, see

0:15:54.680 --> 0:15:58.160
<v Speaker 7>if what the hell happens in five years with the world,

0:15:58.520 --> 0:16:02.240
<v Speaker 7>or should I just try to be creative and figure

0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:04.200
<v Speaker 7>shit out on the creative side on my own.

0:16:04.960 --> 0:16:07.000
<v Speaker 3>Well you know what we're gonna tell you. Girl, that's

0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:08.320
<v Speaker 3>like a girl.

0:16:09.480 --> 0:16:12.360
<v Speaker 1>Well, I mean, okay, do you feel like you're in

0:16:12.360 --> 0:16:16.080
<v Speaker 1>a position financially that you can you'll have like that

0:16:16.200 --> 0:16:18.200
<v Speaker 1>you could be okay for a second so that you

0:16:18.200 --> 0:16:21.320
<v Speaker 1>could do that, or is this are you risking it all?

0:16:22.000 --> 0:16:23.840
<v Speaker 3>Is this a risk? It risk at all? Decision?

0:16:24.080 --> 0:16:25.800
<v Speaker 4>It is a risk all. I guess that's the part

0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:26.600
<v Speaker 4>I should have mentioned.

0:16:26.640 --> 0:16:32.080
<v Speaker 7>Like when I left my job in August, I was

0:16:32.120 --> 0:16:34.720
<v Speaker 7>like the standard six seven months out as far as

0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:35.680
<v Speaker 7>savings or whatever.

0:16:36.600 --> 0:16:37.600
<v Speaker 4>But now it's.

0:16:37.440 --> 0:16:41.640
<v Speaker 7>Getting tight, so like I'll be good this month, but

0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:43.720
<v Speaker 7>next month, I'm like trying to figure out where my

0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:46.040
<v Speaker 7>money is gonna come from. And I'm actually fighting with

0:16:46.080 --> 0:16:49.800
<v Speaker 7>a client right now about my check. It's been a

0:16:49.840 --> 0:16:54.040
<v Speaker 7>month since I work for them, and so I'm just like,

0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:59.040
<v Speaker 7>do I want to kind of mess with my finances

0:16:59.120 --> 0:17:01.840
<v Speaker 7>right now or do I just want to make sure

0:17:01.840 --> 0:17:04.119
<v Speaker 7>that I have money for my bills next month? And

0:17:04.280 --> 0:17:08.800
<v Speaker 7>moving forward into the season for production stuff picks up.

0:17:09.720 --> 0:17:15.199
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I think you may want to take maybe a

0:17:15.240 --> 0:17:19.000
<v Speaker 2>part time job on some old faithful This is what

0:17:19.119 --> 0:17:21.520
<v Speaker 2>I know, this is my trade. This is definitely gonna

0:17:21.520 --> 0:17:23.919
<v Speaker 2>have a check type shit. And in the meantime you

0:17:23.960 --> 0:17:26.640
<v Speaker 2>need to actively be I mean, like, are your mom

0:17:26.840 --> 0:17:32.239
<v Speaker 2>your mom? Oh well, I'm real, I'll do it. Just

0:17:32.240 --> 0:17:34.080
<v Speaker 2>do whatever you want, yeah, live your life, live on

0:17:34.119 --> 0:17:36.480
<v Speaker 2>a couple of couches, a couple of noodles.

0:17:36.960 --> 0:17:37.240
<v Speaker 3>Shit.

0:17:37.680 --> 0:17:39.800
<v Speaker 2>I mean I feel like when you have to like

0:17:39.920 --> 0:17:42.480
<v Speaker 2>do what you love, be happy. You know, your happiness

0:17:42.520 --> 0:17:44.920
<v Speaker 2>is important, and I think when you lead with that,

0:17:45.040 --> 0:17:47.840
<v Speaker 2>everything else kind of gets taken care of at some point.

0:17:47.840 --> 0:17:49.439
<v Speaker 2>I mean, obviously you know what you have to do,

0:17:49.520 --> 0:17:51.679
<v Speaker 2>but like I think, just tell a job. If you

0:17:51.680 --> 0:17:53.560
<v Speaker 2>needed a waitress for a cup for a part time

0:17:53.560 --> 0:17:55.840
<v Speaker 2>at night, that shit is always available. I did it

0:17:55.880 --> 0:17:58.760
<v Speaker 2>for many years and made much money and I met

0:17:58.800 --> 0:17:59.399
<v Speaker 2>a lot of people.

0:17:59.480 --> 0:18:02.399
<v Speaker 1>So like, I think you just have to also just

0:18:02.440 --> 0:18:05.000
<v Speaker 1>like ask yourself a few questions. Am I really ready

0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:08.320
<v Speaker 1>to like embark on this? Am I am I willing

0:18:08.440 --> 0:18:10.000
<v Speaker 1>to sacrifice?

0:18:10.240 --> 0:18:11.359
<v Speaker 3>Am I?

0:18:11.400 --> 0:18:11.480
<v Speaker 2>Like?

0:18:12.640 --> 0:18:16.280
<v Speaker 1>You know, like because obviously even choosing the creative journey

0:18:16.280 --> 0:18:20.400
<v Speaker 1>it's it's it's not for the faint of heart.

0:18:21.720 --> 0:18:24.399
<v Speaker 3>It's you know, but when you are living.

0:18:24.160 --> 0:18:25.960
<v Speaker 1>In your purpose and doing what you have to do,

0:18:26.040 --> 0:18:28.880
<v Speaker 1>it doesn't matter because every time you show up for work,

0:18:28.920 --> 0:18:31.200
<v Speaker 1>you're gonna feel at you're gonna feel activated, you're gonna

0:18:31.240 --> 0:18:34.280
<v Speaker 1>feel ready to do it. And so I mean I'm

0:18:34.320 --> 0:18:36.840
<v Speaker 1>a more like I believe that you should follow your dreams,

0:18:36.840 --> 0:18:38.760
<v Speaker 1>but I also for me, like I need a little

0:18:38.800 --> 0:18:40.879
<v Speaker 1>bit of like like the part time jobs that you

0:18:41.040 --> 0:18:43.080
<v Speaker 1>think was is crucial. Like I feel like you needs

0:18:43.080 --> 0:18:45.119
<v Speaker 1>to build like some stability so that you have the

0:18:45.160 --> 0:18:46.320
<v Speaker 1>space to be creative.

0:18:46.440 --> 0:18:49.320
<v Speaker 2>You have space, yah, because if you're stressed in any

0:18:49.400 --> 0:18:51.800
<v Speaker 2>in any job, there's if you make a lot of

0:18:51.800 --> 0:18:53.840
<v Speaker 2>money or not. If you're stressed in any capacity, then

0:18:54.000 --> 0:18:55.680
<v Speaker 2>it's not you're not going you're gonna have.

0:18:55.600 --> 0:18:57.960
<v Speaker 3>Stress, But it depends what kind of stress you're trying

0:18:57.960 --> 0:18:58.200
<v Speaker 3>to have.

0:18:58.480 --> 0:19:01.439
<v Speaker 2>Like, yeah, survival stress, so I have somewhere to go tomorrow. Stress,

0:19:01.480 --> 0:19:04.119
<v Speaker 2>that's just a dire stress that's on the high stress

0:19:04.160 --> 0:19:07.880
<v Speaker 2>alert system. But I think it will come to you

0:19:08.160 --> 0:19:11.480
<v Speaker 2>and you you know, and and all the moves will

0:19:11.480 --> 0:19:13.160
<v Speaker 2>make sense in due time.

0:19:13.560 --> 0:19:15.880
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, can you like take a healthcare job that gives

0:19:15.920 --> 0:19:18.280
<v Speaker 1>you a lot more flexibility, you know what I mean,

0:19:18.359 --> 0:19:20.480
<v Speaker 1>like only work part time and then the other part

0:19:20.480 --> 0:19:22.920
<v Speaker 1>of the time you're dedicated to your art and that's

0:19:22.920 --> 0:19:25.320
<v Speaker 1>your job, and.

0:19:25.200 --> 0:19:27.320
<v Speaker 4>That's the thing I've like explored that.

0:19:27.359 --> 0:19:29.800
<v Speaker 7>There's been a few nights where it's like I can't sleep,

0:19:29.880 --> 0:19:31.840
<v Speaker 7>so I'm like, let me see.

0:19:32.000 --> 0:19:33.600
<v Speaker 4>And I'm sorry about the keys because I know you.

0:19:33.640 --> 0:19:38.240
<v Speaker 7>All are recording, but most of the things that offered

0:19:38.240 --> 0:19:42.359
<v Speaker 7>that flexibility that I'm yearning for require some type of

0:19:42.400 --> 0:19:49.639
<v Speaker 7>clinician aspect and I was doing like consulting work and

0:19:50.000 --> 0:19:52.400
<v Speaker 7>you know, stuff like that. So nothing as far as

0:19:52.440 --> 0:19:57.000
<v Speaker 7>like cardiac tech or anything like that, so it kind

0:19:57.000 --> 0:19:58.960
<v Speaker 7>of sucks in that regard.

0:20:00.200 --> 0:20:03.480
<v Speaker 3>Well, I think it will work out.

0:20:04.520 --> 0:20:07.000
<v Speaker 2>Bye, good luck, and thank you for joining our show

0:20:07.040 --> 0:20:12.240
<v Speaker 2>today and we're sending you all the good energy for

0:20:12.320 --> 0:20:13.480
<v Speaker 2>all of the things that you want.

0:20:14.400 --> 0:20:16.639
<v Speaker 3>Make a list, write it, write it, write it down,

0:20:17.640 --> 0:20:18.480
<v Speaker 3>write it down.

0:20:19.840 --> 0:20:21.720
<v Speaker 4>I will thank you, Thank you.

0:20:22.560 --> 0:20:25.320
<v Speaker 2>Bye bye. You have to hang out because we don't

0:20:25.320 --> 0:20:31.040
<v Speaker 2>know how that was fun. Okay, let's see if there's

0:20:31.040 --> 0:20:34.159
<v Speaker 2>any other Do you stay married because it's comfortable, or

0:20:34.200 --> 0:20:37.760
<v Speaker 2>divorce and find someone to connect with? Girl don't do

0:20:37.800 --> 0:20:40.200
<v Speaker 2>anything because it's comfortable. If you're not happy, it's time

0:20:40.200 --> 0:20:43.720
<v Speaker 2>to get the fuck on. We haven't. Oh, Willie Jones,

0:20:44.280 --> 0:20:45.000
<v Speaker 2>he's so cute.

0:20:45.960 --> 0:20:46.400
<v Speaker 1>Hi.

0:20:48.119 --> 0:20:54.560
<v Speaker 2>You so fine, fine, fine looking, all cute. You're orange beanie.

0:20:54.600 --> 0:20:55.240
<v Speaker 2>Good morning?

0:20:55.320 --> 0:20:55.919
<v Speaker 3>Where are you?

0:20:56.440 --> 0:21:01.000
<v Speaker 1>Are you back in Nashville yesterday?

0:21:01.240 --> 0:21:01.680
<v Speaker 2>Oh shit?

0:21:01.760 --> 0:21:03.520
<v Speaker 3>Come on, what are you doing tonight?

0:21:03.720 --> 0:21:07.280
<v Speaker 2>Meet us in Hollywood. We're gonna dmu our locations.

0:21:07.760 --> 0:21:10.520
<v Speaker 4>Okay, no more cool.

0:21:10.400 --> 0:21:13.159
<v Speaker 1>So you guys. I met Willie one night, like a

0:21:13.200 --> 0:21:16.240
<v Speaker 1>month ago. I went to, Uh, what's the spot?

0:21:16.240 --> 0:21:17.320
<v Speaker 3>The sofa tel? They have the.

0:21:18.800 --> 0:21:18.879
<v Speaker 6>No?

0:21:19.280 --> 0:21:23.200
<v Speaker 2>Actually, WILLI? I met Willy the night before. I met

0:21:23.200 --> 0:21:26.000
<v Speaker 2>Willy the night before, and I was wearing a jacket.

0:21:26.119 --> 0:21:28.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh at Delilah. I was wearing a jacket with fringes

0:21:28.680 --> 0:21:31.000
<v Speaker 2>on it. And I think he was wearing a jacket

0:21:31.000 --> 0:21:32.720
<v Speaker 2>with fringe on it. And I was like, I like

0:21:32.760 --> 0:21:34.399
<v Speaker 2>a jacket or something, and we had.

0:21:34.240 --> 0:21:38.360
<v Speaker 3>A Oh my god, I was drunk. Bro, I don't

0:21:38.440 --> 0:21:39.600
<v Speaker 3>remember that you weren't with me?

0:21:39.840 --> 0:21:40.040
<v Speaker 2>Oh?

0:21:40.160 --> 0:21:41.760
<v Speaker 3>I was like, what, you weren't with me?

0:21:41.800 --> 0:21:43.800
<v Speaker 2>I met him separately the night before, and I just

0:21:43.840 --> 0:21:45.840
<v Speaker 2>came up to him and went like this, I guess

0:21:45.880 --> 0:21:47.960
<v Speaker 2>that was the That was the symbol of we are

0:21:48.000 --> 0:21:51.200
<v Speaker 2>from the same tribe. And then we ran into him

0:21:51.359 --> 0:21:54.480
<v Speaker 2>the night after a soft and said and he said

0:21:54.480 --> 0:21:59.480
<v Speaker 2>merchant one with the jacket and I said yeah.

0:21:58.320 --> 0:22:02.200
<v Speaker 6>And then yeah, we had a deep cup. We did

0:22:03.000 --> 0:22:05.720
<v Speaker 6>we did, which I'm still on the case. One of

0:22:05.760 --> 0:22:08.000
<v Speaker 6>the reasons I am out here, but we can talk

0:22:08.040 --> 0:22:08.359
<v Speaker 6>about that.

0:22:08.680 --> 0:22:11.320
<v Speaker 3>I'm glad. I'm glad to hear that, Willie. I'm really

0:22:11.320 --> 0:22:13.080
<v Speaker 3>am How do you break up with someone?

0:22:13.119 --> 0:22:15.040
<v Speaker 1>I want to ask a man, how do how How

0:22:15.080 --> 0:22:16.760
<v Speaker 1>have you broken up with women in the past?

0:22:16.880 --> 0:22:20.639
<v Speaker 6>Is it like, well, my first breakup was like it

0:22:20.680 --> 0:22:22.840
<v Speaker 6>was high school. She was like my high school sweetheart

0:22:22.960 --> 0:22:26.840
<v Speaker 6>and she moved away, and it was just it was

0:22:26.880 --> 0:22:29.280
<v Speaker 6>in high school and yeah, and I just caught her

0:22:29.320 --> 0:22:32.280
<v Speaker 6>on the phone and I was like, you know, I

0:22:32.359 --> 0:22:35.119
<v Speaker 6>love you and we've been together for these years and

0:22:35.560 --> 0:22:38.800
<v Speaker 6>I'll always be here for you, but this ain't working out.

0:22:39.600 --> 0:22:42.240
<v Speaker 6>And then she was like but she she was real

0:22:42.320 --> 0:22:44.760
<v Speaker 6>quiet at the time. She had just moved and she

0:22:44.880 --> 0:22:46.879
<v Speaker 6>was like, well, who's gonna be my friend? And I

0:22:47.000 --> 0:22:51.960
<v Speaker 6>was like, I'll still be your friend. And then another

0:22:52.280 --> 0:22:56.280
<v Speaker 6>another time it was bad. I just I just got

0:22:56.359 --> 0:22:58.560
<v Speaker 6>really I was just in my head like towards the

0:22:58.600 --> 0:23:02.639
<v Speaker 6>end of the relationship, and I just started to shrink

0:23:02.720 --> 0:23:06.000
<v Speaker 6>myself man, and like for like an hour. And she

0:23:06.200 --> 0:23:07.760
<v Speaker 6>was like, you want to break over me?

0:23:07.840 --> 0:23:11.960
<v Speaker 1>And I was like, yeah, not just do you want

0:23:12.000 --> 0:23:12.680
<v Speaker 1>to break over here?

0:23:12.720 --> 0:23:14.600
<v Speaker 3>I was like, yeah, yeah I did.

0:23:14.840 --> 0:23:15.600
<v Speaker 2>Actually I do.

0:23:17.119 --> 0:23:17.800
<v Speaker 7>Never again.

0:23:17.920 --> 0:23:20.080
<v Speaker 6>Now. I like to communicate and talk, and I don't

0:23:20.119 --> 0:23:24.480
<v Speaker 6>like to leave fuckers with like questions, especially when it's

0:23:24.520 --> 0:23:27.399
<v Speaker 6>like disturbing the peace, and I'm like, I can offer

0:23:27.480 --> 0:23:30.640
<v Speaker 6>you some kind of piece. I like to communicate now

0:23:30.640 --> 0:23:33.840
<v Speaker 6>because that's just the easiest thing for me because if

0:23:33.840 --> 0:23:37.040
<v Speaker 6>my whole stuff here, I start to forget how to dress,

0:23:37.280 --> 0:23:38.120
<v Speaker 6>I forget.

0:23:38.000 --> 0:23:38.639
<v Speaker 3>How to dress.

0:23:38.720 --> 0:23:40.919
<v Speaker 2>It's true, fuck up your whole swag and fox all

0:23:40.920 --> 0:23:41.479
<v Speaker 2>your shit up.

0:23:42.240 --> 0:23:43.520
<v Speaker 3>All right, Well, we'll see you tonight.

0:23:43.560 --> 0:23:47.840
<v Speaker 1>We're gonna hit you up tonight, okay, bibo.

0:23:49.520 --> 0:23:52.400
<v Speaker 2>Well I love what a nice guy.

0:23:52.880 --> 0:23:55.080
<v Speaker 1>When I met him, I just was like immediately like

0:23:55.200 --> 0:23:57.679
<v Speaker 1>drawn to him. Yeah, you just started talking like straight up,

0:23:57.760 --> 0:24:01.520
<v Speaker 1>had the deepest conversation, like right. I remember I was

0:24:01.560 --> 0:24:03.240
<v Speaker 1>in the corner and y'all were over there, and I

0:24:03.280 --> 0:24:04.560
<v Speaker 1>was like me and him were like yeah, I know.

0:24:04.680 --> 0:24:07.520
<v Speaker 2>I was like, are you sharing? I know? You're like,

0:24:07.520 --> 0:24:14.480
<v Speaker 2>come here, come here, look at this picture. Oh my god.

0:24:14.560 --> 0:24:16.960
<v Speaker 2>I've been trying to keep it sexy, and literally, Like

0:24:17.080 --> 0:24:20.959
<v Speaker 2>a Kitten gets it poppin'. Every month, they sent a

0:24:21.280 --> 0:24:24.520
<v Speaker 2>very special subscription box to your house. You don't have

0:24:24.560 --> 0:24:25.920
<v Speaker 2>to leave the house, you don't have to park, you

0:24:25.920 --> 0:24:28.000
<v Speaker 2>don't have to pick the shit out. It's perfect. They

0:24:28.000 --> 0:24:32.640
<v Speaker 2>have lingerie little toys. Last week I got some nipple tassels,

0:24:32.760 --> 0:24:35.479
<v Speaker 2>and that keeps the shit sexy as fuck. I know.

0:24:35.600 --> 0:24:38.640
<v Speaker 1>They even have a byob box aka build your own

0:24:38.680 --> 0:24:42.240
<v Speaker 1>box girl. Last time, I got handcuffs, robes, massage, oils.

0:24:42.680 --> 0:24:45.159
<v Speaker 1>Every category you can think of they have. Everything is

0:24:45.200 --> 0:24:49.080
<v Speaker 1>within reach. And what's amazing is the box only costs

0:24:49.080 --> 0:24:51.679
<v Speaker 1>seventy nine dollars and some of the vibrators are lone

0:24:51.840 --> 0:24:55.159
<v Speaker 1>retail for seventy nine dollars, So the entire box of

0:24:55.240 --> 0:24:57.800
<v Speaker 1>six gifts is a steal. And right now, Like a

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0:25:17.920 --> 0:25:20.080
<v Speaker 3>Emails, laundry, groceries.

0:25:20.200 --> 0:25:23.080
<v Speaker 1>The list goes on. There's a lot that's on your

0:25:23.119 --> 0:25:25.080
<v Speaker 1>to do list, but what should be at the top.

0:25:25.240 --> 0:25:26.560
<v Speaker 3>The answer is you, girl.

0:25:26.840 --> 0:25:27.840
<v Speaker 2>This year, put.

0:25:27.720 --> 0:25:31.240
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0:26:01.119 --> 0:26:04.600
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0:26:06.200 --> 0:26:08.960
<v Speaker 2>I've noticed my morning routine can really make or break

0:26:09.000 --> 0:26:11.440
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0:26:11.640 --> 0:26:14.439
<v Speaker 2>I'm hitting the gym or hitting the snooze button. I

0:26:14.480 --> 0:26:17.000
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0:26:17.080 --> 0:26:18.920
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0:26:19.000 --> 0:26:22.080
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0:26:22.160 --> 0:26:24.840
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0:26:30.560 --> 0:26:34.480
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0:26:36.880 --> 0:26:40.639
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0:26:48.160 --> 0:26:51.120
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0:26:51.160 --> 0:26:54.320
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0:26:54.359 --> 0:26:58.560
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0:26:58.600 --> 0:27:02.240
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0:27:06.119 --> 0:27:09.720
<v Speaker 2>I think we have some more advice questions. Let's see.

0:27:09.800 --> 0:27:12.560
<v Speaker 2>Let's see, how do you keep it together if you're

0:27:12.600 --> 0:27:16.600
<v Speaker 2>constantly ridiculed for something you didn't choose but just happens,

0:27:16.960 --> 0:27:18.960
<v Speaker 2>like a pregnancy in a DNA test?

0:27:19.520 --> 0:27:20.240
<v Speaker 3>Wait?

0:27:20.359 --> 0:27:20.399
<v Speaker 6>What?

0:27:21.600 --> 0:27:22.920
<v Speaker 3>Wait? Does that's what it says?

0:27:23.000 --> 0:27:23.199
<v Speaker 5>The end?

0:27:23.359 --> 0:27:23.560
<v Speaker 6>Yeah?

0:27:23.560 --> 0:27:24.960
<v Speaker 3>Wait, okay, you say it again.

0:27:25.280 --> 0:27:28.400
<v Speaker 2>How do you keep it together when you're constantly ridiculed

0:27:28.680 --> 0:27:30.840
<v Speaker 2>for something you didn't choose but just happens like a

0:27:30.880 --> 0:27:34.800
<v Speaker 2>pregnancy in a DNA test. Oh, like someone's constantly ridiculing

0:27:34.840 --> 0:27:37.800
<v Speaker 2>you by having about having to about getting pregnant and

0:27:37.840 --> 0:27:40.879
<v Speaker 2>having to get a DNA test. I mean, shit happens. Boom,

0:27:41.160 --> 0:27:45.840
<v Speaker 2>that's fuck them. I mean literally, Lesha got the DNA test.

0:27:45.960 --> 0:27:49.800
<v Speaker 2>Some pitches just be like, is you well? You know,

0:27:50.000 --> 0:27:52.239
<v Speaker 2>like you're welcome. I was. I kept it real, and

0:27:52.359 --> 0:27:54.680
<v Speaker 2>now you should shut the fuck up about the being ridiculed.

0:27:54.840 --> 0:27:55.960
<v Speaker 3>Science said it was you boot.

0:27:56.080 --> 0:27:57.479
<v Speaker 2>I mean, what do you want for me? It's just

0:27:57.520 --> 0:27:59.600
<v Speaker 2>this is what happened, and this is the result of

0:27:59.640 --> 0:28:02.080
<v Speaker 2>what happened, and beat it. If you can't get with

0:28:02.119 --> 0:28:05.480
<v Speaker 2>it because it's already happened, right, how can I build

0:28:05.560 --> 0:28:07.800
<v Speaker 2>my confidence? I think I'm doing it right, then I

0:28:07.800 --> 0:28:08.439
<v Speaker 2>feel like I'm not.

0:28:09.080 --> 0:28:13.160
<v Speaker 1>Well, That's that's the confidence journey. That's the confidence journey.

0:28:13.160 --> 0:28:16.040
<v Speaker 1>It's you feel like you're getting ahead, and then you

0:28:16.080 --> 0:28:17.960
<v Speaker 1>take a few steps back, and then you have to

0:28:17.960 --> 0:28:19.679
<v Speaker 1>get there because you still haven't healed from there. And

0:28:19.680 --> 0:28:21.359
<v Speaker 1>then you heal that part and then you move forward

0:28:21.400 --> 0:28:24.719
<v Speaker 1>and go back and it's just like until one day

0:28:24.760 --> 0:28:26.960
<v Speaker 1>you wake up and finally that part is healed.

0:28:27.119 --> 0:28:29.399
<v Speaker 2>Okay, so there's how to help my child to the

0:28:29.480 --> 0:28:32.520
<v Speaker 2>soura sorrow of her forming of her father, forming a

0:28:32.560 --> 0:28:36.560
<v Speaker 2>new family with a wife and a kid. She is devastated. Hmm.

0:28:36.920 --> 0:28:38.280
<v Speaker 1>I wonder how old she is. She might be a

0:28:38.320 --> 0:28:42.280
<v Speaker 1>little bit older or who knows. But that's a really

0:28:42.320 --> 0:28:47.320
<v Speaker 1>tough one, especially if you are also going through it too.

0:28:47.480 --> 0:28:49.280
<v Speaker 1>Could you imagine like trying to.

0:28:49.120 --> 0:28:52.320
<v Speaker 2>Be there for your kid. And also, I mean you haven't,

0:28:52.360 --> 0:28:55.400
<v Speaker 2>you haven't really experienced the whole thing, but like I

0:28:55.480 --> 0:28:56.680
<v Speaker 2>mean a sibling.

0:28:56.560 --> 0:29:00.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean I've definitely I've in my situation, my

0:29:00.640 --> 0:29:04.440
<v Speaker 1>ex now has two kids with two different women, which

0:29:04.520 --> 0:29:06.840
<v Speaker 1>was the first one was a complete shock and the

0:29:06.880 --> 0:29:09.120
<v Speaker 1>second one was pretty much a shock as well.

0:29:09.800 --> 0:29:13.320
<v Speaker 3>We weren't together anymore. But it doesn't.

0:29:14.440 --> 0:29:16.360
<v Speaker 1>I would it'd be a lie, I said, It didn't

0:29:16.480 --> 0:29:19.560
<v Speaker 1>terribly affect me, you know, and devastate me in a way,

0:29:20.000 --> 0:29:23.720
<v Speaker 1>especially when you are like the first baby mama and

0:29:24.280 --> 0:29:27.960
<v Speaker 1>you kind of I don't know, there's like this hierarchy,

0:29:28.040 --> 0:29:31.280
<v Speaker 1>there's this like I'm the first. We've shared this thing together,

0:29:31.840 --> 0:29:35.680
<v Speaker 1>this first together, we shared like we intentionally made this

0:29:35.800 --> 0:29:40.240
<v Speaker 1>child together. Like that when it's when you're no longer

0:29:40.280 --> 0:29:45.760
<v Speaker 1>alone on that island. It feels triggering, It feels egotistical.

0:29:45.960 --> 0:29:49.120
<v Speaker 1>It feels like someone has stabbed you in the fucking

0:29:49.160 --> 0:29:51.920
<v Speaker 1>heart and ripped it out pretty.

0:29:51.640 --> 0:29:54.280
<v Speaker 2>Much, natch your crown.

0:29:54.480 --> 0:30:02.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm totally fine, guys, No, I know, I am, but

0:30:02.600 --> 0:30:04.960
<v Speaker 1>it took me a long time to say that and

0:30:05.000 --> 0:30:08.120
<v Speaker 1>be and say I am. You know, But for my daughter,

0:30:08.240 --> 0:30:10.719
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I didn't really experience that. She was actually

0:30:10.720 --> 0:30:13.440
<v Speaker 1>excited about it. She didn't really have a concept of

0:30:13.440 --> 0:30:16.280
<v Speaker 1>what it meant because honestly, she doesn't remember us together,

0:30:16.840 --> 0:30:18.760
<v Speaker 1>so it was just like daddy was having, you know,

0:30:18.920 --> 0:30:21.760
<v Speaker 1>another baby. I think she always wants us, wanted, like

0:30:21.840 --> 0:30:25.080
<v Speaker 1>she feels the love that we've shared, because I think

0:30:25.120 --> 0:30:29.880
<v Speaker 1>it's just anate lee part of her. But she was excited,

0:30:30.000 --> 0:30:34.520
<v Speaker 1>so I don't I think, like I think the way

0:30:34.680 --> 0:30:37.160
<v Speaker 1>if it wasn't that way, it would have to really

0:30:37.160 --> 0:30:41.040
<v Speaker 1>be a lot of reassuring of like that we're still

0:30:41.080 --> 0:30:42.560
<v Speaker 1>a family. It would have to be a lot of

0:30:42.600 --> 0:30:46.440
<v Speaker 1>conversations with him about like making her feel supported. It

0:30:46.440 --> 0:30:48.480
<v Speaker 1>would really I don't know, like I would take it

0:30:48.520 --> 0:30:53.080
<v Speaker 1>as an opportunity to talk to him and his new woman.

0:30:53.240 --> 0:30:56.440
<v Speaker 2>Or even if I mean even therapists, Like therapists offer

0:30:56.680 --> 0:30:59.720
<v Speaker 2>a support for family therapy in ways that are not

0:30:59.880 --> 0:31:02.520
<v Speaker 2>just like we're a happy family, but there are ways

0:31:02.560 --> 0:31:04.440
<v Speaker 2>to like you know, include you know, for.

0:31:04.520 --> 0:31:07.920
<v Speaker 1>Sure therapy is crucial, but I think also like the

0:31:08.000 --> 0:31:12.080
<v Speaker 1>family has to be kind to support her, Yeah, support her.

0:31:11.920 --> 0:31:15.360
<v Speaker 2>And if they don't, I mean I would say, don't

0:31:15.400 --> 0:31:18.760
<v Speaker 2>try and overly overly compensate with like material things. I

0:31:18.800 --> 0:31:21.880
<v Speaker 2>think sometimes parents do that if like one parent is

0:31:21.920 --> 0:31:25.120
<v Speaker 2>missing or something is they're in order to fill that void,

0:31:25.160 --> 0:31:27.440
<v Speaker 2>they like give a lot of shit. And I think

0:31:27.480 --> 0:31:31.080
<v Speaker 2>sometimes it's just like offering the conversation, how are you feeling,

0:31:31.160 --> 0:31:33.400
<v Speaker 2>checking in with them, giving them the opportunity to talk

0:31:33.400 --> 0:31:35.120
<v Speaker 2>about it and let them know that their feelings are

0:31:35.240 --> 0:31:36.680
<v Speaker 2>justified and.

0:31:36.680 --> 0:31:38.200
<v Speaker 3>Okay, and also.

0:31:39.400 --> 0:31:41.800
<v Speaker 1>Honestly, like I know, we want to protect our kids

0:31:42.000 --> 0:31:46.000
<v Speaker 1>from everything, but this is real life shit, and she's

0:31:46.040 --> 0:31:48.720
<v Speaker 1>going to have to like sometimes real life shit hits early.

0:31:48.880 --> 0:31:52.080
<v Speaker 1>Sometimes it happens sooner than we want. That's life, you know,

0:31:52.360 --> 0:31:57.800
<v Speaker 1>And I mean obviously support her and do all those things,

0:31:57.840 --> 0:32:00.560
<v Speaker 1>but also she has to understand too, like this is

0:32:00.640 --> 0:32:04.080
<v Speaker 1>life and things will, things change, and maybe there's beauty

0:32:04.080 --> 0:32:06.480
<v Speaker 1>in it too, like I don't know. I don't know

0:32:06.520 --> 0:32:09.800
<v Speaker 1>what the situation is on the other side, but I

0:32:09.800 --> 0:32:10.400
<v Speaker 1>think it's.

0:32:10.280 --> 0:32:12.800
<v Speaker 3>Just it's life essentially.

0:32:13.960 --> 0:32:19.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that reminds that there's another question about someone. How

0:32:19.400 --> 0:32:21.880
<v Speaker 2>how long should you wait to introduce your kid to

0:32:21.920 --> 0:32:25.160
<v Speaker 2>someone you're dating. She said she her daughter loves her

0:32:25.200 --> 0:32:28.320
<v Speaker 2>dad so much and she thinks she'll be shady, And

0:32:28.360 --> 0:32:30.520
<v Speaker 2>I mean, like that's another thing, Like, it's life. It's

0:32:30.600 --> 0:32:34.480
<v Speaker 2>not super calculated. Unfortunately, there's no like universal age that

0:32:34.560 --> 0:32:37.960
<v Speaker 2>makes it like or time. Six weeks, six months, you know,

0:32:38.040 --> 0:32:40.160
<v Speaker 2>that is a perfect time to introduce someone. I think.

0:32:40.360 --> 0:32:42.640
<v Speaker 2>I think sometimes people wait too long and then you

0:32:42.680 --> 0:32:44.280
<v Speaker 2>fuck around they don't like each other at all, and

0:32:44.280 --> 0:32:45.560
<v Speaker 2>you're like, damn, it's not gonna work.

0:32:46.240 --> 0:32:50.320
<v Speaker 1>I mean, do you have male friends, because essentially that's

0:32:50.360 --> 0:32:53.240
<v Speaker 1>what this person is. It's coming around to you know,

0:32:53.360 --> 0:32:55.680
<v Speaker 1>and not immediately just hey, this is mommy's boyfriend all

0:32:55.880 --> 0:32:58.360
<v Speaker 1>of a sudden, like you ease into that, you build

0:32:58.360 --> 0:33:00.640
<v Speaker 1>the trust that she needs to know. Oh, this is

0:33:00.640 --> 0:33:02.520
<v Speaker 1>someone that my mom can rely on. Oh this is

0:33:02.600 --> 0:33:06.280
<v Speaker 1>my mom's friend. Okay, cool, and hopefully that you know,

0:33:06.800 --> 0:33:10.120
<v Speaker 1>you get to that point. So I think that's another thing,

0:33:10.240 --> 0:33:11.760
<v Speaker 1>is like not, And I mean me and me and

0:33:11.840 --> 0:33:13.720
<v Speaker 1>Mila have talked about this a lot, like not having

0:33:13.760 --> 0:33:15.920
<v Speaker 1>like this Prince Charming come in out of no fucking

0:33:15.960 --> 0:33:18.640
<v Speaker 1>weear and it being like a Disney movie like this

0:33:18.720 --> 0:33:21.760
<v Speaker 1>is my mommy's man now, and like yeah, like mommy's

0:33:21.800 --> 0:33:23.959
<v Speaker 1>allowed to have male friends. Mommy is allowed to have

0:33:24.040 --> 0:33:26.640
<v Speaker 1>male friends around my daughter, you know what I mean,

0:33:26.680 --> 0:33:29.920
<v Speaker 1>Like we often separate and villainize men as like these

0:33:29.960 --> 0:33:30.960
<v Speaker 1>things predators.

0:33:31.080 --> 0:33:32.240
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and it's like.

0:33:32.200 --> 0:33:33.360
<v Speaker 2>Automatically every man.

0:33:33.480 --> 0:33:35.760
<v Speaker 3>And that is not to say that we never have

0:33:35.800 --> 0:33:36.840
<v Speaker 3>some That's not to say.

0:33:36.720 --> 0:33:39.800
<v Speaker 1>That everyone needs to meet my child. Okay, no, it's

0:33:39.840 --> 0:33:42.000
<v Speaker 1>not to say that. But I think that we need

0:33:42.040 --> 0:33:47.520
<v Speaker 1>to normalize our kids and our kids seeing us a

0:33:47.680 --> 0:33:51.240
<v Speaker 1>just in different spaces with different people, and sometimes that

0:33:51.280 --> 0:33:54.120
<v Speaker 1>includes to like male friends. And I'm sure that you

0:33:54.120 --> 0:33:56.200
<v Speaker 1>have your kid around male friends, but you just don't

0:33:56.360 --> 0:33:58.320
<v Speaker 1>associate it that way because you're not fucking them.

0:33:59.400 --> 0:34:02.000
<v Speaker 2>And like I introduced my kid to like two guys

0:34:02.000 --> 0:34:06.080
<v Speaker 2>I dated in the last two years, and she liked

0:34:06.080 --> 0:34:08.799
<v Speaker 2>them both a lot. And you know I hadn't. I

0:34:08.840 --> 0:34:11.680
<v Speaker 2>had a weird like epiphany the other day when I

0:34:11.719 --> 0:34:14.919
<v Speaker 2>was like in the car and I was like, I'm

0:34:14.920 --> 0:34:18.239
<v Speaker 2>really grateful. I'm really grateful for those two guys, for

0:34:18.520 --> 0:34:20.200
<v Speaker 2>like the role they played in her life. And like

0:34:20.239 --> 0:34:23.040
<v Speaker 2>even though it didn't work out on both like occasions

0:34:23.040 --> 0:34:26.120
<v Speaker 2>and we don't talk and whatever, but like they were

0:34:26.120 --> 0:34:28.240
<v Speaker 2>really kind to her. They each taught her different things,

0:34:28.280 --> 0:34:31.120
<v Speaker 2>you know, like one was like like very interactive and

0:34:31.239 --> 0:34:33.759
<v Speaker 2>took us like camping and shit, and like that was

0:34:33.840 --> 0:34:36.400
<v Speaker 2>really a good like experience for her. That's where I

0:34:36.520 --> 0:34:38.320
<v Speaker 2>like spoiled her a lot, and like I think she

0:34:38.400 --> 0:34:40.959
<v Speaker 2>understood like how it felt to be spoiled by a man,

0:34:41.480 --> 0:34:45.000
<v Speaker 2>and I appreciate that, like I thought I was at

0:34:45.040 --> 0:34:47.279
<v Speaker 2>the end of the day, despite like how those things ended,

0:34:47.280 --> 0:34:49.360
<v Speaker 2>which I wish, I wish, I don't wish that we

0:34:49.400 --> 0:34:52.040
<v Speaker 2>could still be friends so that they could maintain really

0:34:52.160 --> 0:34:54.319
<v Speaker 2>a friendship. That's the only thing. It's like I've also

0:34:54.360 --> 0:34:56.560
<v Speaker 2>had to teach her. I love them and they were cool,

0:34:56.640 --> 0:34:59.839
<v Speaker 2>but sometimes friendships end and it's okay, and I still

0:35:00.040 --> 0:35:02.640
<v Speaker 2>of them. We just don't talk because like that is

0:35:02.800 --> 0:35:04.840
<v Speaker 2>it just doesn't work out that way, you know, sometimes

0:35:04.880 --> 0:35:06.919
<v Speaker 2>you grow out of friendships. And that's been a cool,

0:35:07.000 --> 0:35:09.439
<v Speaker 2>like not a cool lesson to teach, but it's also

0:35:09.640 --> 0:35:12.640
<v Speaker 2>a necessary one, and had someone maybe taken more time

0:35:12.680 --> 0:35:15.320
<v Speaker 2>to teach me that, I would probably have less psycho

0:35:15.480 --> 0:35:18.560
<v Speaker 2>attachment issues and want to keep people forever and have

0:35:18.640 --> 0:35:21.759
<v Speaker 2>a like please stay, don't you love me? So I

0:35:21.800 --> 0:35:24.200
<v Speaker 2>think it could be an opportunity and it's you're the mom,

0:35:24.239 --> 0:35:25.760
<v Speaker 2>and you know how close you are with that person

0:35:25.800 --> 0:35:27.319
<v Speaker 2>and you know when it's time and you need to

0:35:27.320 --> 0:35:34.040
<v Speaker 2>trust that. Amen o, Kai, anyone want a video request?

0:35:34.400 --> 0:35:37.440
<v Speaker 2>I don't see any more video requests. There's some more

0:35:37.440 --> 0:35:45.160
<v Speaker 2>advice questions though, Girl, how do you sort your mind

0:35:45.320 --> 0:35:47.839
<v Speaker 2>and not get overwhelmed when you have a lot you

0:35:47.920 --> 0:35:51.320
<v Speaker 2>need to do? Torri? How do you what sort your mind?

0:35:51.840 --> 0:35:53.799
<v Speaker 3>You're overwhelmed to have a lot you got to do

0:35:54.160 --> 0:35:54.440
<v Speaker 3>and you.

0:35:54.360 --> 0:35:55.680
<v Speaker 2>Have and you have. When you have a lot you

0:35:55.719 --> 0:35:57.239
<v Speaker 2>need to do, go for.

0:35:57.200 --> 0:36:01.719
<v Speaker 1>A walk, post it, post its and then like what

0:36:01.840 --> 0:36:03.920
<v Speaker 1>is priority? Go for a walk, put your feet in

0:36:03.920 --> 0:36:12.040
<v Speaker 1>the grass immediately and yeah ground also sometimes just call

0:36:12.120 --> 0:36:14.399
<v Speaker 1>it call it a on the fucking day.

0:36:14.440 --> 0:36:15.520
<v Speaker 3>You can't win them all.

0:36:15.960 --> 0:36:19.439
<v Speaker 2>Okay, pur ly, b I'll give you a moment. Let's

0:36:19.480 --> 0:36:20.400
<v Speaker 2>read another one.

0:36:27.480 --> 0:36:29.319
<v Speaker 1>And I got peep someone seid a planner. I've never

0:36:29.360 --> 0:36:30.920
<v Speaker 1>been able to use a plan, I lose them. I

0:36:30.960 --> 0:36:32.080
<v Speaker 1>have like twelve I can't.

0:36:32.480 --> 0:36:34.760
<v Speaker 2>I have twelve notebooks and twelve planners, all with separate

0:36:34.800 --> 0:36:38.840
<v Speaker 2>notes that make no sense. I'm in therapy, but my

0:36:38.920 --> 0:36:41.120
<v Speaker 2>parents also need it. How do I encourage them to

0:36:41.160 --> 0:36:47.840
<v Speaker 2>get help and tell them in therapy without offending them?

0:36:45.960 --> 0:36:48.520
<v Speaker 2>M oh girl?

0:36:48.600 --> 0:36:51.279
<v Speaker 1>And not everybody's gonna go on the therapy journey with you, Boom,

0:36:51.920 --> 0:36:55.040
<v Speaker 1>Like you can, like, obviously you can. What you could

0:36:55.080 --> 0:36:56.960
<v Speaker 1>do is if you can try invite them to your

0:36:57.000 --> 0:37:01.040
<v Speaker 1>therapy session first, maybe say like make them feel like

0:37:01.040 --> 0:37:03.640
<v Speaker 1>you're bringing them in to like, you know, talk to

0:37:03.719 --> 0:37:06.399
<v Speaker 1>them about something, and then you know, take it from there.

0:37:06.920 --> 0:37:11.200
<v Speaker 1>But honestly, like, not everyone's gonna be on with therapy,

0:37:11.560 --> 0:37:15.880
<v Speaker 1>especially I feel like honest unfortunately, like the older, older

0:37:15.880 --> 0:37:18.800
<v Speaker 1>people don't want to talk about their business.

0:37:19.160 --> 0:37:22.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Sonny also asked that kind of goes with this question,

0:37:22.200 --> 0:37:25.759
<v Speaker 2>is Hi, Sonny, how to start repairing a relationship with

0:37:25.800 --> 0:37:28.600
<v Speaker 2>your mother who plays the victim all the time. My

0:37:28.680 --> 0:37:31.960
<v Speaker 2>mom plays a lot of victims. But you know, it's

0:37:32.000 --> 0:37:36.440
<v Speaker 2>really about being patient, being patient and like dabbing in

0:37:36.560 --> 0:37:39.200
<v Speaker 2>seeing if she how righty she is? If you ain't,

0:37:39.239 --> 0:37:42.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm I'm kind of ducking out. You just kind of

0:37:42.280 --> 0:37:44.600
<v Speaker 2>like where are you right now? And you know, me

0:37:44.600 --> 0:37:46.400
<v Speaker 2>and my mom are in a good place and I'm happy,

0:37:46.440 --> 0:37:51.680
<v Speaker 2>but like I understand the irritation with that. In fact,

0:37:51.760 --> 0:37:54.160
<v Speaker 2>something so crazy. She does play the victim all the time,

0:37:54.200 --> 0:37:56.000
<v Speaker 2>and she did something a couple of weeks ago that

0:37:56.160 --> 0:38:00.160
<v Speaker 2>was like some shit, and she was like defensive and

0:38:00.239 --> 0:38:01.759
<v Speaker 2>she was like, you don't need to yell at me.

0:38:01.800 --> 0:38:07.000
<v Speaker 2>And I had this epic opportunity to shift the like

0:38:07.200 --> 0:38:10.000
<v Speaker 2>generally how she like the thing, And I was like,

0:38:10.080 --> 0:38:13.560
<v Speaker 2>it's okay. I was like, it's okay, we all fuck up.

0:38:14.080 --> 0:38:15.960
<v Speaker 2>I fuck up. This was an epic fuck up. So

0:38:16.000 --> 0:38:18.439
<v Speaker 2>she couldn't not not be responsible. Was like the only

0:38:18.560 --> 0:38:21.399
<v Speaker 2>she was the only person responsible. There's no one else

0:38:21.400 --> 0:38:24.520
<v Speaker 2>to deflect on but her. So she was like she

0:38:24.600 --> 0:38:26.200
<v Speaker 2>got quiet, and I was like, it's okay, we all

0:38:26.239 --> 0:38:28.200
<v Speaker 2>fuck up. I'm like, I fuck up. It's all good.

0:38:28.239 --> 0:38:30.800
<v Speaker 2>I'm not getting on you. I'm like, but it happened,

0:38:30.800 --> 0:38:32.920
<v Speaker 2>Like let's figure it out. What do you think is next?

0:38:33.480 --> 0:38:34.960
<v Speaker 2>You know, like what do you think? Like I don't know,

0:38:35.040 --> 0:38:37.080
<v Speaker 2>this is this is what could possibly happen, you know,

0:38:37.160 --> 0:38:39.040
<v Speaker 2>like weigh out the options, but like I was making

0:38:39.080 --> 0:38:41.880
<v Speaker 2>sure for her to know, like it's okay because I

0:38:41.880 --> 0:38:44.320
<v Speaker 2>don't feel like I've gotten that grace from her a lot.

0:38:44.440 --> 0:38:45.759
<v Speaker 2>And I felt like it was like.

0:38:45.760 --> 0:38:49.520
<v Speaker 1>An opportunity to lead by example almost and an interesting

0:38:49.600 --> 0:38:52.240
<v Speaker 1>show her like this is how I want to be treated. Yeah,

0:38:52.800 --> 0:38:54.719
<v Speaker 1>And remember that time I did that? Mom, Why can

0:38:54.840 --> 0:38:55.160
<v Speaker 1>like do.

0:38:55.160 --> 0:38:55.560
<v Speaker 3>That for me?

0:38:55.640 --> 0:38:57.920
<v Speaker 2>Can you show? Yeah? So I was just like calm

0:38:58.320 --> 0:39:02.200
<v Speaker 2>and it is difficult, like just the patience is a constant,

0:39:02.360 --> 0:39:07.200
<v Speaker 2>like exercise at exercising how much you can grow your patients.

0:39:07.760 --> 0:39:08.440
<v Speaker 2>That was big of you.

0:39:08.560 --> 0:39:10.040
<v Speaker 3>Wow, I don't know. I don't know if I had

0:39:10.040 --> 0:39:14.600
<v Speaker 3>that in me, any of it to get that, I

0:39:14.719 --> 0:39:15.279
<v Speaker 3>need to get that.

0:39:16.600 --> 0:39:19.239
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean, I think a part of being like

0:39:19.520 --> 0:39:22.560
<v Speaker 2>a child as an adult is that you begin to,

0:39:22.680 --> 0:39:26.040
<v Speaker 2>especially in this generation, you begin to parent your parents

0:39:26.440 --> 0:39:28.560
<v Speaker 2>and you kind of realize that they're unhealed and that

0:39:28.640 --> 0:39:30.880
<v Speaker 2>they've made mistakes because they don't know shit really, you know,

0:39:31.000 --> 0:39:33.520
<v Speaker 2>just like we don't know shit, like there there are

0:39:33.520 --> 0:39:37.840
<v Speaker 2>our vessels are aging, but like sometimes your mind doesn't

0:39:37.880 --> 0:39:40.440
<v Speaker 2>necessarily evolve, and like a lot of times, you know,

0:39:40.520 --> 0:39:43.719
<v Speaker 2>if you're not pushing for that and that and you

0:39:43.800 --> 0:39:46.560
<v Speaker 2>become kind of the parent and they're the child, and

0:39:46.600 --> 0:39:50.120
<v Speaker 2>it's kind of like understanding, like taking away that super

0:39:50.120 --> 0:39:53.759
<v Speaker 2>mom super dad perspective, and that you can be more

0:39:53.800 --> 0:39:55.800
<v Speaker 2>forgiving and have more patience for them like you would

0:39:55.800 --> 0:39:58.560
<v Speaker 2>for your kid because you realize they're just in those bodies.

0:39:58.600 --> 0:39:59.960
<v Speaker 3>It's true. Wow, that was really deep.

0:40:00.080 --> 0:40:02.239
<v Speaker 1>But also what's stuck with me when you said that

0:40:02.360 --> 0:40:05.399
<v Speaker 1>was the pushing for it, because I feel like even

0:40:05.400 --> 0:40:08.880
<v Speaker 1>the most evolved people have to continue like pushing to

0:40:09.520 --> 0:40:12.080
<v Speaker 1>grasp more, to understand more, you know what I mean.

0:40:12.160 --> 0:40:15.399
<v Speaker 1>So many people just stop or they don't even they're

0:40:15.400 --> 0:40:18.160
<v Speaker 1>like this is good enough, Like there's a lot going on.

0:40:18.160 --> 0:40:19.799
<v Speaker 1>I'd rather not let's just like stay here.

0:40:19.920 --> 0:40:23.759
<v Speaker 2>It's uncomfortable, like it's I don't want to be different growth.

0:40:23.800 --> 0:40:27.360
<v Speaker 3>It's so uncomfortable. It's so annoying.

0:40:27.239 --> 0:40:29.799
<v Speaker 2>Because you get you get comfortable and being angry, you

0:40:29.840 --> 0:40:32.719
<v Speaker 2>get comfortable and being mad, you get comfortable and being

0:40:32.760 --> 0:40:35.960
<v Speaker 2>at being defensive, you get comfortable taking things personally, just

0:40:35.960 --> 0:40:38.360
<v Speaker 2>like you get comfortable and being in a miserable marriage

0:40:38.360 --> 0:40:40.919
<v Speaker 2>and not and blaming the other person instead of taking

0:40:40.960 --> 0:40:43.640
<v Speaker 2>responsibility for your life and for your shit and from

0:40:43.680 --> 0:40:46.719
<v Speaker 2>saying like I'm cool, like you get comfortable and all

0:40:46.760 --> 0:40:50.239
<v Speaker 2>of that sadness and the not evolving, and it's like

0:40:50.320 --> 0:40:51.480
<v Speaker 2>both are hard though.

0:40:51.520 --> 0:40:53.680
<v Speaker 1>Mm hm, but once you but I mean, it's so

0:40:53.800 --> 0:40:56.360
<v Speaker 1>worth it. But it's just it's not easy. It's not

0:40:56.440 --> 0:40:57.359
<v Speaker 1>easy to get over there.

0:40:57.640 --> 0:41:06.239
<v Speaker 2>No, it's not. Oh someone said they love what these queens.

0:41:06.800 --> 0:41:08.640
<v Speaker 2>I love what y'all queens do? I think we need

0:41:08.680 --> 0:41:11.800
<v Speaker 2>more of it? Keep on going? Thank you were going,

0:41:11.880 --> 0:41:17.279
<v Speaker 2>baby going? Should I tell my friend how to tell?

0:41:17.360 --> 0:41:19.279
<v Speaker 2>Should I tell my friend how to tell her? I've

0:41:19.320 --> 0:41:22.640
<v Speaker 2>just been ignoring it, but he keeps progressing. They just

0:41:22.719 --> 0:41:27.000
<v Speaker 2>got married last year after bringing together eleven years. Wait,

0:41:27.040 --> 0:41:29.000
<v Speaker 2>I think I saw some of this story. This is

0:41:29.040 --> 0:41:32.719
<v Speaker 2>not a full question. Oh wait here it is. But

0:41:32.880 --> 0:41:35.640
<v Speaker 2>this last year he started sending dick pics videos of

0:41:35.680 --> 0:41:38.399
<v Speaker 2>him jerking off on Snapchat. I tell my husband every time,

0:41:38.400 --> 0:41:40.520
<v Speaker 2>but he acts dumb as if he doesn't know what

0:41:40.600 --> 0:41:43.640
<v Speaker 2>he did. Wait, wait, wait, what your friend's husband is

0:41:43.680 --> 0:41:45.080
<v Speaker 2>sending you jerk off pictures?

0:41:46.120 --> 0:41:50.200
<v Speaker 3>Your friend's husband and you're and you're you're married, she's married.

0:41:50.320 --> 0:41:53.200
<v Speaker 2>She's married, and she tells her husband what I think

0:41:53.239 --> 0:41:56.520
<v Speaker 2>you need to join? I can't I can't decode this, Frederick,

0:41:56.800 --> 0:41:57.799
<v Speaker 2>but I do need to know.

0:41:58.120 --> 0:42:00.640
<v Speaker 1>How do you deal with anxiety without putting the energy

0:42:00.680 --> 0:42:01.920
<v Speaker 1>off on your kid?

0:42:02.800 --> 0:42:05.920
<v Speaker 2>Who girl, take away And.

0:42:07.200 --> 0:42:09.359
<v Speaker 1>You're not gonna win the mall. You're not gonna win

0:42:09.400 --> 0:42:12.560
<v Speaker 1>it all every time. You're gonna fail. But the fact

0:42:12.600 --> 0:42:15.520
<v Speaker 1>that you're even aware of it is step one. Because

0:42:15.600 --> 0:42:19.799
<v Speaker 1>some people just have no self awareness and are just

0:42:20.120 --> 0:42:21.640
<v Speaker 1>constantly just being.

0:42:21.400 --> 0:42:23.560
<v Speaker 3>Mean to their kids because they have anxiety and are

0:42:23.600 --> 0:42:24.160
<v Speaker 3>stressed out.

0:42:24.800 --> 0:42:28.360
<v Speaker 2>I mean to be honest, like kids are super loud

0:42:28.400 --> 0:42:31.319
<v Speaker 2>and annoying, and so the noise level doesn't really help

0:42:31.360 --> 0:42:34.319
<v Speaker 2>with the anxiety. But this is very healthy that you

0:42:34.400 --> 0:42:36.720
<v Speaker 2>notice like this is my this is a personal problem,

0:42:36.800 --> 0:42:38.680
<v Speaker 2>and actually all this shit really doesn't need to get

0:42:38.719 --> 0:42:40.680
<v Speaker 2>done right now, and actually I need to just tend

0:42:40.680 --> 0:42:44.080
<v Speaker 2>to my child and be kind and patient and sit

0:42:44.320 --> 0:42:47.000
<v Speaker 2>like put my phone away and you know, at least

0:42:47.000 --> 0:42:49.560
<v Speaker 2>you's realizing that you're doing it, and apologize.

0:42:49.880 --> 0:42:52.200
<v Speaker 1>I think also what helps me in those moments is

0:42:52.280 --> 0:42:55.040
<v Speaker 1>really just being present and knowing that this moment, that

0:42:55.200 --> 0:42:57.200
<v Speaker 1>where we are right now, this age that she's in,

0:42:57.239 --> 0:43:00.640
<v Speaker 1>this this innocence that she possesses. I'm not, but one

0:43:00.719 --> 0:43:02.680
<v Speaker 1>day I'm gonna wish I could be back here in

0:43:02.719 --> 0:43:05.560
<v Speaker 1>this moment and wish I could have like done it

0:43:05.600 --> 0:43:06.680
<v Speaker 1>better for her, I know.

0:43:07.120 --> 0:43:07.879
<v Speaker 2>And then that gives me.

0:43:08.160 --> 0:43:10.600
<v Speaker 1>Because now she's off in the world, not giving a fuck,

0:43:10.680 --> 0:43:12.360
<v Speaker 1>doing whatever the fuck she wants, not calling me, and

0:43:12.360 --> 0:43:15.359
<v Speaker 1>she's in Europe, fucking abroad in college and I don't

0:43:15.360 --> 0:43:17.719
<v Speaker 1>know where she's at, And all I could wish was

0:43:17.719 --> 0:43:19.640
<v Speaker 1>that I just would have paid attention to her when

0:43:19.680 --> 0:43:22.439
<v Speaker 1>she was eight and wanted to fucking you know, build

0:43:22.440 --> 0:43:23.360
<v Speaker 1>a ginger breadhouse.

0:43:23.840 --> 0:43:24.040
<v Speaker 6>I know.

0:43:24.080 --> 0:43:25.359
<v Speaker 2>I think about that all the time. I'm like, one

0:43:25.400 --> 0:43:27.279
<v Speaker 2>day she's gonna be like a teenager and I'm gonna

0:43:27.280 --> 0:43:29.000
<v Speaker 2>look up and I'm gonna be like, oh my god,

0:43:29.160 --> 0:43:33.120
<v Speaker 2>whatever I was working on Instagram was not important, and

0:43:33.160 --> 0:43:36.720
<v Speaker 2>it's not. And it's just like, yeah, that shit haunts

0:43:36.719 --> 0:43:38.439
<v Speaker 2>me and that she's never gonna be And even looking

0:43:38.440 --> 0:43:40.799
<v Speaker 2>at her now, I'm like, you're so tall, you're gonna

0:43:40.800 --> 0:43:42.719
<v Speaker 2>be bigger than me. You're so beautiful, like who and

0:43:42.840 --> 0:43:47.120
<v Speaker 2>how she talks, and I'm like so that I always

0:43:47.200 --> 0:43:48.960
<v Speaker 2>I always think of this is the last time she's

0:43:48.960 --> 0:43:50.840
<v Speaker 2>gonna be this age, at this time, at this moment,

0:43:50.920 --> 0:43:54.359
<v Speaker 2>and like take every second of it. I never try

0:43:54.400 --> 0:43:55.520
<v Speaker 2>and take any of it for granted.

0:43:55.680 --> 0:44:00.840
<v Speaker 1>Also weed we also weed, weed is kind of crucial

0:44:00.880 --> 0:44:01.920
<v Speaker 1>if you don't smoke.

0:44:01.640 --> 0:44:02.640
<v Speaker 3>It, consider it.

0:44:04.200 --> 0:44:06.719
<v Speaker 1>Or maybe eat it, eat it, smoke it, rub it on.

0:44:06.840 --> 0:44:09.319
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, do do something supplements?

0:44:09.360 --> 0:44:12.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, we finally got a video request not

0:44:12.120 --> 0:44:13.840
<v Speaker 2>thank you, Eric. I don't want to repeat the cycle

0:44:13.840 --> 0:44:16.640
<v Speaker 2>of me and my mom's rinaldo. Who's Ronaldo.

0:44:17.920 --> 0:44:18.120
<v Speaker 6>Hip?

0:44:19.239 --> 0:44:22.920
<v Speaker 5>Okay, so I'm obviously like naturally co signing everything you

0:44:23.040 --> 0:44:26.600
<v Speaker 5>girls are staying. But like I really want to talk about,

0:44:27.680 --> 0:44:31.120
<v Speaker 5>even like with self awareness and just like awareness of

0:44:31.160 --> 0:44:34.760
<v Speaker 5>like human beings and yourself and life, why do friendship

0:44:34.800 --> 0:44:37.440
<v Speaker 5>breakups still fucking hit even.

0:44:37.280 --> 0:44:38.160
<v Speaker 4>As you get older.

0:44:38.239 --> 0:44:41.880
<v Speaker 5>I'm like in my thirties, and anytime it happens, even

0:44:41.960 --> 0:44:44.080
<v Speaker 5>though deep down I'm like I knew it about this bitch,

0:44:44.120 --> 0:44:48.239
<v Speaker 5>I just know it, it's still like I don't know,

0:44:48.360 --> 0:44:50.719
<v Speaker 5>it hurts. That shit hurts harder than like, you know,

0:44:51.239 --> 0:44:53.719
<v Speaker 5>intimate breakups with like people you're romantic with.

0:44:54.920 --> 0:44:57.160
<v Speaker 2>I think, because first of all, it doesn't matter how

0:44:57.239 --> 0:45:00.200
<v Speaker 2>fucking self aware evolved any of that shit. Like you

0:45:00.239 --> 0:45:02.960
<v Speaker 2>still have feelings. You know, everybody has feelings, and you

0:45:03.000 --> 0:45:05.680
<v Speaker 2>have to feel them. That's why they're called feelings. There's

0:45:05.760 --> 0:45:08.000
<v Speaker 2>nothing like that means you someone told me like that

0:45:08.040 --> 0:45:10.399
<v Speaker 2>means you're human. You know, if you stop feeling shit,

0:45:10.840 --> 0:45:13.400
<v Speaker 2>then what the fuck like, then you're some fucking sociopath.

0:45:13.560 --> 0:45:15.640
<v Speaker 2>So I just I think you put especially when you're

0:45:15.640 --> 0:45:18.120
<v Speaker 2>a loyal ass friend like these two water bitches sitting

0:45:18.200 --> 0:45:21.080
<v Speaker 2>up here, Like when you really love people, I think

0:45:21.200 --> 0:45:23.279
<v Speaker 2>it does sting. You're like, damn, I really fucked with

0:45:23.280 --> 0:45:25.520
<v Speaker 2>that person. I really gave them my loyalty. I really

0:45:25.600 --> 0:45:29.000
<v Speaker 2>did these things. And so it's like the fucking audacity. Eric.

0:45:29.040 --> 0:45:31.000
<v Speaker 2>I just had a falling out with a friend recently,

0:45:31.040 --> 0:45:35.040
<v Speaker 2>as in the thirty something year all had to okay, yeah, when.

0:45:36.560 --> 0:45:41.640
<v Speaker 1>Recently, like oh, I'm like wait, hold on, you know

0:45:41.680 --> 0:45:44.000
<v Speaker 1>what that shit did really hurt and pissed me off.

0:45:44.160 --> 0:45:45.759
<v Speaker 3>You know why I think it is It was.

0:45:45.719 --> 0:45:47.480
<v Speaker 1>Just as you're asking this question, I was like, oh

0:45:47.480 --> 0:45:49.600
<v Speaker 1>my god, this is is only okay.

0:45:49.719 --> 0:45:51.000
<v Speaker 3>I don't want to say this is true for me,

0:45:51.080 --> 0:45:52.080
<v Speaker 3>but it is a little bit true.

0:45:52.160 --> 0:45:55.040
<v Speaker 1>Is it because we expect men to leave, whereas like

0:45:55.040 --> 0:45:58.160
<v Speaker 1>like romantic partners will expect to expire, but friendships we

0:45:58.239 --> 0:46:01.439
<v Speaker 1>like hold in this other regard where like when it does,

0:46:01.480 --> 0:46:04.160
<v Speaker 1>we're like, what the fuck, Like you're you're not supposed

0:46:04.160 --> 0:46:07.040
<v Speaker 1>to leave, Like I'm not even fucking me.

0:46:08.480 --> 0:46:08.880
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:46:09.239 --> 0:46:11.600
<v Speaker 4>I feel it's weird too. I feel it's weird too,

0:46:11.640 --> 0:46:12.960
<v Speaker 4>depending on the friendship, right.

0:46:12.840 --> 0:46:16.560
<v Speaker 5>Not weird, but like in my my friendships, I like

0:46:16.680 --> 0:46:19.160
<v Speaker 5>to like pursue it and treat it the same way

0:46:19.160 --> 0:46:21.799
<v Speaker 5>I would like an intimate relationship, you know what I mean,

0:46:21.920 --> 0:46:25.480
<v Speaker 5>Like the same importance, the same love on different levels obviously,

0:46:25.560 --> 0:46:27.640
<v Speaker 5>so it just like hurts extra.

0:46:27.920 --> 0:46:28.840
<v Speaker 4>It just hurts extra.

0:46:28.920 --> 0:46:32.719
<v Speaker 5>And I find too, when you're older, people can be shistier.

0:46:32.840 --> 0:46:34.400
<v Speaker 4>So like you would think it's.

0:46:34.280 --> 0:46:37.440
<v Speaker 5>Like a breakup and it's done whatever, but then like

0:46:37.480 --> 0:46:38.960
<v Speaker 5>you know, they're going out of their way to be

0:46:39.040 --> 0:46:41.680
<v Speaker 5>friends with your friends now, and like they're.

0:46:41.480 --> 0:46:44.040
<v Speaker 4>Popping up where you popping up, and it's like I've been.

0:46:43.880 --> 0:46:46.200
<v Speaker 5>Crying over you for days, girl, like and you're just

0:46:46.239 --> 0:46:48.800
<v Speaker 5>trying so hard to like be close to the people

0:46:48.800 --> 0:46:49.680
<v Speaker 5>that I'm close with, so.

0:46:49.719 --> 0:46:51.640
<v Speaker 4>Like you know what I mean.

0:46:52.120 --> 0:46:55.520
<v Speaker 5>So anyways, that's like my thing lately is like my

0:46:55.520 --> 0:46:58.200
<v Speaker 5>my younger cousin was telling me about this like bad

0:46:58.320 --> 0:47:00.480
<v Speaker 5>friendship breakup. She had and I was like, girl, I

0:47:00.520 --> 0:47:02.480
<v Speaker 5>wish I could tell you it gets better, but it actually.

0:47:02.239 --> 0:47:04.880
<v Speaker 1>Gets Wait, I didn't realize this is a real Is

0:47:04.920 --> 0:47:08.239
<v Speaker 1>this like an epidemic that's happening, Like, I don't know.

0:47:08.320 --> 0:47:09.279
<v Speaker 3>I think, I don't know.

0:47:09.320 --> 0:47:12.200
<v Speaker 1>I haven't had that many friendship breakups. I think, like,

0:47:12.520 --> 0:47:15.520
<v Speaker 1>I don't, really, I don't. Maybe you are more of

0:47:15.560 --> 0:47:17.759
<v Speaker 1>a friendly bitch than I am. And I have lots

0:47:17.800 --> 0:47:21.320
<v Speaker 1>of friends, but I don't I generally have like my

0:47:21.320 --> 0:47:24.000
<v Speaker 1>my friends. Of course, I've made friends throughout even throughout

0:47:24.040 --> 0:47:27.279
<v Speaker 1>this our journey and podcasting, but I don't know.

0:47:27.360 --> 0:47:29.200
<v Speaker 3>I haven't had that many friendship breakups.

0:47:29.239 --> 0:47:31.520
<v Speaker 1>I had one recently, which was but I kind of

0:47:31.600 --> 0:47:33.480
<v Speaker 1>knew that was coming. And I know the type of

0:47:33.480 --> 0:47:36.279
<v Speaker 1>bit she was, you know you ah, yeah, I know

0:47:36.280 --> 0:47:37.920
<v Speaker 1>the type of bit she was. It didn't make me.

0:47:38.120 --> 0:47:40.759
<v Speaker 2>I was pissed, but usually, you know what usually the

0:47:40.840 --> 0:47:43.360
<v Speaker 2>thing is being self aware and being older, is that

0:47:43.880 --> 0:47:47.440
<v Speaker 2>when it happens, you're just like, yeah, that bit, like

0:47:47.520 --> 0:47:50.560
<v Speaker 2>you do know. Like like prior to the beginning of

0:47:50.600 --> 0:47:53.359
<v Speaker 2>me and Erica starting this podcast, I had a pretty

0:47:53.360 --> 0:47:56.680
<v Speaker 2>close friend who we had a broke. I had two

0:47:56.760 --> 0:47:59.200
<v Speaker 2>close friends that I broke up with that, I broke

0:47:59.280 --> 0:48:03.000
<v Speaker 2>up with our podcast period, and with both of them,

0:48:03.040 --> 0:48:05.239
<v Speaker 2>I knew they're both kind of fucking crazy, So it's

0:48:05.280 --> 0:48:07.919
<v Speaker 2>like I think about them, I'm like, ah, like those

0:48:07.920 --> 0:48:10.960
<v Speaker 2>pitches are crazy like that, it wasn't I knew that

0:48:11.040 --> 0:48:14.600
<v Speaker 2>it probably didn't have longevity because I was As you

0:48:14.760 --> 0:48:18.320
<v Speaker 2>progress in a friendship, you inevitably see people more clearly.

0:48:18.600 --> 0:48:20.560
<v Speaker 2>They start to show their true colors, you know, and

0:48:20.600 --> 0:48:23.920
<v Speaker 2>as a grown woman, you're like, that is not a

0:48:23.960 --> 0:48:26.520
<v Speaker 2>grow how a grown woman should act, and so you

0:48:26.600 --> 0:48:29.839
<v Speaker 2>kind of know who's not gonna last. And like even

0:48:29.880 --> 0:48:32.120
<v Speaker 2>the ones that you didn't see it coming, it's like

0:48:32.239 --> 0:48:34.239
<v Speaker 2>when they do show their ass. I think, if you're

0:48:34.239 --> 0:48:35.960
<v Speaker 2>a woman and you decide to cut off a friend,

0:48:36.000 --> 0:48:39.279
<v Speaker 2>it's generally for a very good reason, and you got

0:48:39.280 --> 0:48:41.480
<v Speaker 2>to honor yourself and be like, all right, bitch a

0:48:41.480 --> 0:48:44.560
<v Speaker 2>little tier tier, but keep it pushing because I have

0:48:44.640 --> 0:48:46.880
<v Speaker 2>real friends. I actually have friends that I fuck with

0:48:46.920 --> 0:48:48.360
<v Speaker 2>that I've kept for a long time, So I know

0:48:48.440 --> 0:48:51.279
<v Speaker 2>it's not like it's just not it's not for me.

0:48:52.239 --> 0:48:54.000
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, I don't want it to be a problem

0:48:54.000 --> 0:48:54.200
<v Speaker 4>for me.

0:48:54.280 --> 0:48:56.040
<v Speaker 5>I feel that it's just like something that came up

0:48:56.040 --> 0:48:58.000
<v Speaker 5>for me recently, and I'm like, seriously, like I don't

0:48:58.040 --> 0:48:59.600
<v Speaker 5>even have time to grieve with this right now. I'm

0:48:59.640 --> 0:49:02.560
<v Speaker 5>just so busy, like I'm a mom, like what And

0:49:02.600 --> 0:49:04.480
<v Speaker 5>then it's worse when your friends are kids too.

0:49:04.520 --> 0:49:05.359
<v Speaker 4>It's just a whole thing.

0:49:05.440 --> 0:49:08.319
<v Speaker 5>And I'm like really like but like you said, like

0:49:08.680 --> 0:49:13.160
<v Speaker 5>people show their ass, see the signs.

0:49:13.239 --> 0:49:14.680
<v Speaker 2>And I used to be like that too, Like I

0:49:14.719 --> 0:49:16.839
<v Speaker 2>had the one of the friends. It was a little bitch.

0:49:17.160 --> 0:49:19.880
<v Speaker 2>Our kids were friends and like all these fun things together.

0:49:20.320 --> 0:49:23.040
<v Speaker 2>But thankfully my baby daddy maintained that friendship and I

0:49:23.080 --> 0:49:25.000
<v Speaker 2>don't have to, but like I had, I just had

0:49:25.000 --> 0:49:27.279
<v Speaker 2>to release that too, like I'm sorry, I can't. I

0:49:27.320 --> 0:49:29.880
<v Speaker 2>can't fucking help your friendship because we're not friends anymore.

0:49:30.000 --> 0:49:33.120
<v Speaker 2>My bad Like can't do it. Sorry, my piece is

0:49:33.160 --> 0:49:35.040
<v Speaker 2>more important than yours. I make the rules. You don't

0:49:35.040 --> 0:49:35.279
<v Speaker 2>have a.

0:49:35.239 --> 0:49:39.520
<v Speaker 5>Car, yeah, yeah, true, true, No. I appreciate you all feedback,

0:49:39.600 --> 0:49:42.120
<v Speaker 5>like obviously, like I'm good and stuff, but it's always

0:49:42.160 --> 0:49:43.840
<v Speaker 5>just some shit that is at the back of my

0:49:43.920 --> 0:49:45.759
<v Speaker 5>mind and like this person pops up and it's just

0:49:45.800 --> 0:49:48.719
<v Speaker 5>like why are friendship break up the fucking worst.

0:49:49.480 --> 0:49:51.880
<v Speaker 2>Because they heart just like regular breakups. It's just loving

0:49:51.920 --> 0:49:56.160
<v Speaker 2>people and then uncoupling from them. Is is hard because

0:49:56.200 --> 0:49:58.560
<v Speaker 2>you're in routine and you're used to calling them every

0:49:58.640 --> 0:50:00.480
<v Speaker 2>day or every other day, texting them. There's things you

0:50:01.080 --> 0:50:04.400
<v Speaker 2>start to do together. It's more about breaking the routine, honestly,

0:50:05.000 --> 0:50:08.120
<v Speaker 2>because the time away eventually the time separates you any

0:50:08.120 --> 0:50:08.640
<v Speaker 2>fucking way.

0:50:09.480 --> 0:50:11.120
<v Speaker 4>This is also like advice.

0:50:12.200 --> 0:50:14.960
<v Speaker 5>Like I would take for a relationship even though I'm married,

0:50:15.200 --> 0:50:17.800
<v Speaker 5>you know, like just apply that same ship to everybody,

0:50:17.840 --> 0:50:19.279
<v Speaker 5>just the same way. I love my friends the same

0:50:19.320 --> 0:50:22.880
<v Speaker 5>way with like a romantic partner, you know, like you

0:50:22.920 --> 0:50:24.680
<v Speaker 5>show up for your friends like that, just it happens.

0:50:24.719 --> 0:50:26.879
<v Speaker 5>You cook for them, you clean for them, you wipe

0:50:26.880 --> 0:50:28.440
<v Speaker 5>their ass if they get a BBO, Like.

0:50:33.320 --> 0:50:35.400
<v Speaker 3>You're a good friend, are you?

0:50:35.719 --> 0:50:38.160
<v Speaker 1>If I ever get that, I'm calling you, Okabbage, I

0:50:38.239 --> 0:50:39.200
<v Speaker 1>mean I'm gonna.

0:50:38.960 --> 0:50:39.720
<v Speaker 2>Heal an Autowa.

0:50:39.840 --> 0:50:41.719
<v Speaker 3>I'm coming to Ottawa to get my BBL.

0:50:42.920 --> 0:50:44.959
<v Speaker 2>I found a great BBL doctor.

0:50:45.520 --> 0:50:46.920
<v Speaker 5>You know what, I might as well just do the

0:50:46.960 --> 0:50:48.040
<v Speaker 5>BBL myself too.

0:50:48.080 --> 0:50:53.080
<v Speaker 2>I'll give you guys, oh a surgeon.

0:50:54.200 --> 0:50:58.640
<v Speaker 1>No no, no, She's like literally, I have a whole

0:50:58.640 --> 0:51:01.880
<v Speaker 1>group chat happening today about like happening in my phone

0:51:02.120 --> 0:51:04.200
<v Speaker 1>currently real time while.

0:51:03.960 --> 0:51:07.200
<v Speaker 2>We've been on here dollar it's only ten thousand.

0:51:07.440 --> 0:51:09.000
<v Speaker 3>My friend is like, this is the ass I want?

0:51:09.080 --> 0:51:12.880
<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm already researching Texas in Houston and Mexico.

0:51:13.080 --> 0:51:15.160
<v Speaker 2>No wait, first it first it started out as a

0:51:15.200 --> 0:51:18.359
<v Speaker 2>workout like motivation, like I want this ass. Yeah, let's

0:51:18.400 --> 0:51:20.440
<v Speaker 2>go to the stairs. And then I don't wear the doctors.

0:51:20.480 --> 0:51:22.200
<v Speaker 1>It went from like meet me on this hike to

0:51:22.320 --> 0:51:23.480
<v Speaker 1>let's just get asses.

0:51:23.680 --> 0:51:24.840
<v Speaker 3>Let's just buy asses.

0:51:25.880 --> 0:51:27.560
<v Speaker 4>It's so funny, you know what.

0:51:27.640 --> 0:51:31.080
<v Speaker 5>It was an intense incline from working out to BBL,

0:51:31.120 --> 0:51:34.279
<v Speaker 5>but you're scared to get that for the most part.

0:51:34.320 --> 0:51:36.600
<v Speaker 4>So they do like the cupping, you know, like the section.

0:51:37.040 --> 0:51:39.239
<v Speaker 3>How long does that last? That's only last like a

0:51:39.680 --> 0:51:40.160
<v Speaker 3>one hour.

0:51:41.080 --> 0:51:42.480
<v Speaker 4>I don't know, but I've seen.

0:51:42.280 --> 0:51:44.200
<v Speaker 5>Like the results right after, and it takes a few

0:51:44.239 --> 0:51:46.000
<v Speaker 5>weeks to heal, and honestly, it looks terrible.

0:51:47.600 --> 0:51:50.000
<v Speaker 2>I feel like it's not good for your blood vessels.

0:51:50.440 --> 0:51:52.160
<v Speaker 2>That can't be healthy. That can't be I mean, I

0:51:52.200 --> 0:51:53.240
<v Speaker 2>don't think either are.

0:51:53.520 --> 0:51:54.160
<v Speaker 3>Neither are great.

0:51:54.960 --> 0:51:57.520
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, we need to be proud of our little butts,

0:51:57.520 --> 0:52:00.680
<v Speaker 5>medium butts, like all the booties just get a little

0:52:00.719 --> 0:52:02.560
<v Speaker 5>jiggle in it if you can, even if it's flat

0:52:02.640 --> 0:52:03.920
<v Speaker 5>and like call it a day.

0:52:03.920 --> 0:52:05.680
<v Speaker 3>Shake some do some squats whatever.

0:52:06.640 --> 0:52:09.680
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I agree. I mean, this is the body you got,

0:52:09.760 --> 0:52:13.720
<v Speaker 2>you know, take care of it, love it, you know. Yeah,

0:52:13.760 --> 0:52:16.640
<v Speaker 2>I agree. I think I across all like spectrums, I

0:52:16.680 --> 0:52:19.160
<v Speaker 2>think that's generally what it should be. If this is

0:52:19.200 --> 0:52:23.360
<v Speaker 2>how you got here, should probably keep it exactly.

0:52:23.440 --> 0:52:23.880
<v Speaker 3>I agree.

0:52:23.920 --> 0:52:26.160
<v Speaker 1>But also I have fake boobs, so I was like,

0:52:26.160 --> 0:52:29.239
<v Speaker 1>I agree, but also, my tits are fake boobs.

0:52:29.400 --> 0:52:31.640
<v Speaker 2>Everything he has you should keep, unless.

0:52:31.320 --> 0:52:33.360
<v Speaker 1>It's just boobs, because my tits are not real, but

0:52:33.440 --> 0:52:36.839
<v Speaker 1>everyone else be natural.

0:52:36.920 --> 0:52:41.319
<v Speaker 4>They look so real. I'm like talking like I know

0:52:41.360 --> 0:52:42.200
<v Speaker 4>you in person.

0:52:43.280 --> 0:52:44.839
<v Speaker 3>No, but I I think do it. I think.

0:52:45.120 --> 0:52:48.120
<v Speaker 1>I agree that we need to normalize just being comfortable

0:52:48.160 --> 0:52:49.000
<v Speaker 1>with who the fuck we are.

0:52:49.640 --> 0:52:52.279
<v Speaker 3>But I also agree with do whatever the fuck you want.

0:52:52.520 --> 0:52:55.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but also don't be mad when I make fun

0:52:55.080 --> 0:52:57.800
<v Speaker 1>of you because you look fucking ridiculous.

0:52:57.960 --> 0:52:58.240
<v Speaker 2>Damn.

0:52:58.440 --> 0:53:00.839
<v Speaker 3>Just you know, go with your your own risk. That's

0:53:00.840 --> 0:53:01.600
<v Speaker 3>all I'm gonna say.

0:53:02.000 --> 0:53:05.240
<v Speaker 2>All in always, I don't agree with those little ass

0:53:05.280 --> 0:53:08.160
<v Speaker 2>thighs and those big dumb diaper booties. We at least

0:53:08.320 --> 0:53:11.240
<v Speaker 2>proportion them, bitches. Come on, tell the doctor to proportion

0:53:11.360 --> 0:53:14.200
<v Speaker 2>the hips to the ass or else you're gonna look dumb.

0:53:14.200 --> 0:53:16.920
<v Speaker 2>It's you look like a Christmas turkey.

0:53:17.000 --> 0:53:17.920
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, that's like.

0:53:18.000 --> 0:53:20.520
<v Speaker 5>And also I see a lot of like younger girls get.

0:53:20.400 --> 0:53:21.919
<v Speaker 4>It, which is fine, Like you know, do you?

0:53:22.000 --> 0:53:24.960
<v Speaker 5>But you don't realize how much your hormones change as

0:53:25.000 --> 0:53:27.760
<v Speaker 5>you like leave your twenties and get into your thirties,

0:53:27.800 --> 0:53:28.480
<v Speaker 5>and like I swear to.

0:53:28.520 --> 0:53:31.160
<v Speaker 4>God, like your hips get bigger, your your teaeties get bigger,

0:53:31.160 --> 0:53:32.320
<v Speaker 4>like sometimes it happens.

0:53:32.320 --> 0:53:34.080
<v Speaker 3>So just wait, just wait a second.

0:53:34.520 --> 0:53:37.000
<v Speaker 5>But I'll let somebody else join. I love this so much,

0:53:37.040 --> 0:53:39.280
<v Speaker 5>Thank you, ladies, and I'll keep.

0:53:39.200 --> 0:53:42.120
<v Speaker 1>Listening in I have a fourteen year old boy who

0:53:42.160 --> 0:53:44.320
<v Speaker 1>is growing through this pandemic.

0:53:44.400 --> 0:53:46.399
<v Speaker 3>It's so different to try to relate to him.

0:53:46.520 --> 0:53:49.600
<v Speaker 1>Ideas, God, I don't even know how I'm supposed to

0:53:49.600 --> 0:53:51.760
<v Speaker 1>relate to a boy, a fourteen year old boy.

0:53:51.680 --> 0:53:55.560
<v Speaker 2>In a pandemic. That's tough. I think for sure, get

0:53:55.600 --> 0:53:59.080
<v Speaker 2>him into like other like social activities together, like maybe

0:53:59.080 --> 0:54:00.960
<v Speaker 2>try something new to get for the first.

0:54:00.719 --> 0:54:03.800
<v Speaker 3>Time, something that he wants to do that he's into.

0:54:03.840 --> 0:54:05.600
<v Speaker 2>Like fencing. I don't know why I thought of that.

0:54:05.640 --> 0:54:09.239
<v Speaker 1>Ben is that the most delicate masculine sport you could

0:54:09.239 --> 0:54:11.400
<v Speaker 1>take up, like fencing.

0:54:11.680 --> 0:54:16.800
<v Speaker 3>It's violence, but it's classy. Yeah, cla classy violence.

0:54:17.280 --> 0:54:20.400
<v Speaker 2>You know we both can get.

0:54:21.480 --> 0:54:22.439
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that would be fun.

0:54:22.480 --> 0:54:24.320
<v Speaker 2>I mean what boy wouldn't do that? Okay, well maybe

0:54:24.320 --> 0:54:28.480
<v Speaker 2>like the break room breakroom, like breaking ship. There's those

0:54:28.520 --> 0:54:30.520
<v Speaker 2>rooms where you can break shit all over. I think

0:54:30.560 --> 0:54:31.480
<v Speaker 2>boys would like that.

0:54:32.280 --> 0:54:35.240
<v Speaker 3>Race car driving, risk your life, basically risk your life.

0:54:36.040 --> 0:54:40.520
<v Speaker 2>Oh, I know, skydiving. I mean, like what boy would

0:54:40.560 --> 0:54:42.920
<v Speaker 2>be like? Yeah, I want skydiving with my mom. Get

0:54:42.920 --> 0:54:45.640
<v Speaker 2>a tat too, Oh yeah, I get hit that too.

0:54:46.239 --> 0:54:50.440
<v Speaker 2>These are terrible. Why would you ask for a parenting

0:54:50.480 --> 0:54:53.040
<v Speaker 2>get but you know we're not there, We're not four two.

0:54:53.040 --> 0:54:53.520
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:54:54.000 --> 0:54:55.399
<v Speaker 3>We'll check back in seven years.

0:54:55.480 --> 0:54:57.480
<v Speaker 2>I thought those were good ideas. Maybe we were rafting.

0:54:57.920 --> 0:54:58.880
<v Speaker 2>Maybe just go on a trip.

0:54:58.960 --> 0:55:00.480
<v Speaker 3>We were raffed, okay, I think.

0:55:02.040 --> 0:55:03.319
<v Speaker 2>We don't know what kind of mommy you are? You

0:55:03.400 --> 0:55:05.000
<v Speaker 2>are your adventure enough for that.

0:55:05.280 --> 0:55:06.759
<v Speaker 1>Maybe teach him how to drive? Go take him and

0:55:06.760 --> 0:55:08.719
<v Speaker 1>take him, teach him how to drive. Go like that

0:55:08.840 --> 0:55:09.359
<v Speaker 1>be your thing.

0:55:09.480 --> 0:55:10.200
<v Speaker 2>Like a road trip.

0:55:10.239 --> 0:55:12.840
<v Speaker 1>Once a week, you guys go and like drive in

0:55:12.880 --> 0:55:15.480
<v Speaker 1>the parking lot somewhere where he can feel like you're

0:55:15.520 --> 0:55:17.839
<v Speaker 1>giving your trust, You're you're giving him his trust, you're

0:55:17.880 --> 0:55:19.800
<v Speaker 1>spending time, he's feeling in control.

0:55:21.280 --> 0:55:23.520
<v Speaker 3>I don't know. I think I don't know. I think

0:55:23.560 --> 0:55:24.279
<v Speaker 3>that would be a good one.

0:55:24.360 --> 0:55:26.360
<v Speaker 2>I was gonna say something because I remember, you know

0:55:26.360 --> 0:55:26.680
<v Speaker 2>what it is.

0:55:26.719 --> 0:55:28.200
<v Speaker 3>I was thinking, Okay, I don't know what you're gonna say.

0:55:28.239 --> 0:55:29.480
<v Speaker 2>I shouldn't say. Okay.

0:55:29.600 --> 0:55:31.480
<v Speaker 1>Well, I was thinking about like my dad, like me

0:55:31.520 --> 0:55:33.759
<v Speaker 1>and my dad, like how we One of the ways

0:55:33.760 --> 0:55:35.880
<v Speaker 1>that we bonded was that like he would let me.

0:55:36.120 --> 0:55:37.680
<v Speaker 1>He would go to Texas and he would let me

0:55:37.719 --> 0:55:40.719
<v Speaker 1>go out into the field like back country and shit.

0:55:40.760 --> 0:55:41.800
<v Speaker 3>And drive his truck.

0:55:41.840 --> 0:55:44.840
<v Speaker 1>And I was probably like eight seven or eight maybe,

0:55:45.239 --> 0:55:46.880
<v Speaker 1>but like it was fun for me.

0:55:47.480 --> 0:55:50.800
<v Speaker 3>I felt like I was bonding. I felt like he trusted.

0:55:50.360 --> 0:55:52.360
<v Speaker 1>Me and I trusted him, and we were in this

0:55:52.480 --> 0:55:55.400
<v Speaker 1>together and it was like obviously I was younger, but

0:55:55.440 --> 0:55:57.839
<v Speaker 1>I still think even a fourteen year old, like they're

0:55:58.000 --> 0:56:00.880
<v Speaker 1>starting to feel like not starting the probably been feeling

0:56:00.880 --> 0:56:02.600
<v Speaker 1>like they want to be independent. They want to feel

0:56:02.600 --> 0:56:06.960
<v Speaker 1>like they are in control of their life in a way,

0:56:07.360 --> 0:56:08.399
<v Speaker 1>And I think that could be cool.

0:56:08.440 --> 0:56:12.280
<v Speaker 2>That's true. You feel like there's some independence in that. Yeah, Hi, ladies,

0:56:12.320 --> 0:56:15.680
<v Speaker 2>what are your thoughts on single motherhood by choice? This

0:56:15.760 --> 0:56:20.120
<v Speaker 2>is miss Missy Kamala. I'm thirty four, financially stable, good

0:56:20.120 --> 0:56:23.560
<v Speaker 2>support system from my family, but trash dating life. I

0:56:23.600 --> 0:56:27.680
<v Speaker 2>have success, I have access to IVF, and I'm debating

0:56:27.680 --> 0:56:32.440
<v Speaker 2>whether or not to go ahead with it. I think

0:56:32.520 --> 0:56:37.080
<v Speaker 2>it's hard right, Like to me, thirty four is not

0:56:37.440 --> 0:56:41.920
<v Speaker 2>like you're not at the You're not at the last

0:56:42.640 --> 0:56:46.680
<v Speaker 2>point of conception, you know. I know everybody's bodies work different,

0:56:46.800 --> 0:56:50.279
<v Speaker 2>and like some people get pregnant at forty three, some

0:56:50.360 --> 0:56:53.719
<v Speaker 2>people stop getting like have trouble at thirty five. I

0:56:53.760 --> 0:56:56.400
<v Speaker 2>think if you if everything's like working well and you

0:56:56.440 --> 0:56:58.160
<v Speaker 2>don't have any reason, like you've gone to the doctor,

0:56:58.160 --> 0:57:00.359
<v Speaker 2>you have every reason to like worry, if you want

0:57:00.400 --> 0:57:03.160
<v Speaker 2>a relationship with someone and for to have like a

0:57:03.239 --> 0:57:07.319
<v Speaker 2>family together. At some point I think that I think

0:57:07.360 --> 0:57:10.480
<v Speaker 2>you have some time to, like, you know, hope that

0:57:10.560 --> 0:57:14.440
<v Speaker 2>this trash dating life gets less trash. This is just

0:57:14.520 --> 0:57:16.600
<v Speaker 2>my advice because it's the advice I give my friends

0:57:16.640 --> 0:57:19.600
<v Speaker 2>that are thirty four, the ones who are fucking freaking

0:57:19.600 --> 0:57:23.600
<v Speaker 2>out that don't have any kids. But everybody knows their

0:57:23.680 --> 0:57:25.640
<v Speaker 2>themselves and where they're at and what they want for

0:57:25.680 --> 0:57:30.320
<v Speaker 2>their life. So I only I always ask is like, Okay,

0:57:30.400 --> 0:57:33.720
<v Speaker 2>so say you have a baby and the baby's for

0:57:34.080 --> 0:57:36.880
<v Speaker 2>and then you meet a guy that you like, really

0:57:37.000 --> 0:57:39.000
<v Speaker 2>like and love, Like, I don't know, I guess he'll

0:57:39.040 --> 0:57:41.680
<v Speaker 2>just come come in and take you know, take you both,

0:57:41.840 --> 0:57:44.080
<v Speaker 2>just like with how it works with me. But like

0:57:44.160 --> 0:57:48.280
<v Speaker 2>maybe he'll be like, why didn't you wait? Why didn't

0:57:48.280 --> 0:57:49.800
<v Speaker 2>you wait so I could be here from the beginning.

0:57:49.920 --> 0:57:52.160
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I don't thinking about the other person. Yeah,

0:57:52.200 --> 0:57:52.520
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

0:57:52.600 --> 0:57:53.640
<v Speaker 3>I would like him.

0:57:54.040 --> 0:57:55.760
<v Speaker 1>Do what you want to do for yourself. I mean,

0:57:55.800 --> 0:57:57.440
<v Speaker 1>if that's what you if you feel like you're ready

0:57:57.520 --> 0:58:00.600
<v Speaker 1>right now, And I don't know, I feel like that's

0:58:00.600 --> 0:58:02.920
<v Speaker 1>a really personal choice that only you can really answer.

0:58:04.040 --> 0:58:07.280
<v Speaker 1>I think that me, I agree with Mila that like

0:58:07.320 --> 0:58:10.000
<v Speaker 1>you're I mean, obviously, go to the doctor, do the

0:58:10.000 --> 0:58:12.400
<v Speaker 1>things you need to do. But I think if love

0:58:12.480 --> 0:58:14.920
<v Speaker 1>is what you would prefer, and that's kind of what

0:58:14.960 --> 0:58:19.320
<v Speaker 1>you're hoping hoping for, like, then go freeze your eggs

0:58:19.400 --> 0:58:20.720
<v Speaker 1>and keep dating.

0:58:24.680 --> 0:58:25.040
<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

0:58:25.080 --> 0:58:28.880
<v Speaker 1>I just I feel like, God, there's so much pressure

0:58:28.880 --> 0:58:31.680
<v Speaker 1>on women to like feel like they need to be

0:58:31.760 --> 0:58:35.280
<v Speaker 1>parents too. I mean, not specifically this person who wrote

0:58:35.320 --> 0:58:37.600
<v Speaker 1>in because I'm you know, I'm sure that you truly do.

0:58:37.680 --> 0:58:43.080
<v Speaker 1>But I think often like it feels like you haven't.

0:58:43.160 --> 0:58:45.000
<v Speaker 1>I feel like society makes you feel like you haven't

0:58:45.000 --> 0:58:48.440
<v Speaker 1>completed your mission on Earth unless you's like been a

0:58:48.480 --> 0:58:50.080
<v Speaker 1>mother of some sort.

0:58:50.800 --> 0:58:53.560
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's very true. I think a lot of women's,

0:58:56.080 --> 0:58:59.720
<v Speaker 2>a lot of women's expectation of themselves to have families

0:58:59.720 --> 0:59:03.720
<v Speaker 2>and children may have come from society and we don't

0:59:03.720 --> 0:59:06.640
<v Speaker 2>even realize it because like that's the only way, like

0:59:06.800 --> 0:59:09.840
<v Speaker 2>most of the way we see women in any media format,

0:59:10.240 --> 0:59:13.800
<v Speaker 2>like grown Women minus like Sex in the City and

0:59:13.880 --> 0:59:16.000
<v Speaker 2>the whole show was about Carrie finding a fucking man

0:59:16.520 --> 0:59:19.280
<v Speaker 2>is about like, you know, like either you have a husband,

0:59:19.360 --> 0:59:21.280
<v Speaker 2>you have a boyfriend, and you're gonna have kids. Like

0:59:21.280 --> 0:59:24.640
<v Speaker 2>at a certain age, there's always this understanding that you're

0:59:24.680 --> 0:59:26.440
<v Speaker 2>gonna get knocked up and have a family and lived

0:59:26.440 --> 0:59:29.040
<v Speaker 2>happily ever after. So I think there takes a lot

0:59:29.040 --> 0:59:32.560
<v Speaker 2>of like exploring if like do you need it, do

0:59:32.560 --> 0:59:33.320
<v Speaker 2>you need that.

0:59:35.880 --> 0:59:36.320
<v Speaker 3>Adoption?

0:59:37.400 --> 0:59:42.560
<v Speaker 1>Auntie traveling without traveling at the drop of a dime,

0:59:42.640 --> 0:59:44.480
<v Speaker 1>without ever having to check in with anyone, doing whatever

0:59:44.480 --> 0:59:46.120
<v Speaker 1>the fuck you want every single moment of the day,

0:59:46.280 --> 0:59:48.400
<v Speaker 1>not paying for two people eating all your food, it

0:59:48.520 --> 0:59:50.040
<v Speaker 1>being only your food and no one else can eat

0:59:50.040 --> 0:59:51.760
<v Speaker 1>your food because it's your fucking food and no one des.

0:59:51.680 --> 0:59:52.640
<v Speaker 3>There to take it.

0:59:53.160 --> 0:59:56.040
<v Speaker 1>No no loud noises to make I mean not to say,

0:59:56.200 --> 0:59:57.040
<v Speaker 1>if you're sick.

0:59:56.920 --> 0:59:58.640
<v Speaker 2>And like not feeling well, you have a headache, and

0:59:58.720 --> 1:00:00.560
<v Speaker 2>someone's like, you said you're an make me tea. You

1:00:00.560 --> 1:00:01.960
<v Speaker 2>said you're gonna make me tee, said you're gonna make

1:00:02.000 --> 1:00:03.720
<v Speaker 2>me tea. I'm hungry, I'm hungry. I need a snack.

1:00:04.200 --> 1:00:06.520
<v Speaker 1>I mean, just really, you think about it, think real

1:00:06.600 --> 1:00:09.600
<v Speaker 1>long and hard about it. It sounds cute until it's here.

1:00:10.000 --> 1:00:11.920
<v Speaker 1>And don't get me wrong, my daughter is like the

1:00:12.360 --> 1:00:15.760
<v Speaker 1>sole purpose of everything. It's She's really the inspiration behind

1:00:15.880 --> 1:00:17.720
<v Speaker 1>even just sitting here right now.

1:00:17.760 --> 1:00:26.919
<v Speaker 2>But shit, just make sure you are ready because yeah,

1:00:27.120 --> 1:00:32.080
<v Speaker 2>especially alone, that is, there's no one else there. I mean,

1:00:32.080 --> 1:00:34.280
<v Speaker 2>hopefully someone else gets there. But you know what I'm saying,

1:00:40.160 --> 1:00:44.520
<v Speaker 2>what is the mom and son sexual connection real? I

1:00:44.560 --> 1:00:47.760
<v Speaker 2>know there is an unbeakable bond, but it is. But

1:00:47.960 --> 1:00:51.360
<v Speaker 2>is it rooted in sexual connection? It's been studied. Is

1:00:51.800 --> 1:00:53.919
<v Speaker 2>I'm just wondering your thoughts. Okay, the study that you're

1:00:53.920 --> 1:00:58.480
<v Speaker 2>referring to it is I don't think it's a study

1:00:58.520 --> 1:01:03.200
<v Speaker 2>of the the son and the mother having a sexual connection,

1:01:03.480 --> 1:01:05.640
<v Speaker 2>because they also compare it the other way, the daughter

1:01:05.960 --> 1:01:08.080
<v Speaker 2>and the father. And it's a theory and it says

1:01:08.120 --> 1:01:14.080
<v Speaker 2>that at a certain age, the child, the female child

1:01:14.320 --> 1:01:18.880
<v Speaker 2>at like four, wants to kill the mother and marry

1:01:18.880 --> 1:01:21.720
<v Speaker 2>the dad. It's like, so there's there is a cond

1:01:21.800 --> 1:01:24.600
<v Speaker 2>like this study, like an older study in psychology, like.

1:01:24.480 --> 1:01:27.160
<v Speaker 3>That most girls feel this way.

1:01:27.960 --> 1:01:31.240
<v Speaker 2>It's just I feel like it's a like a a

1:01:31.320 --> 1:01:35.880
<v Speaker 2>standard that they put to exemplify the intimacy and like

1:01:36.000 --> 1:01:39.600
<v Speaker 2>in how we develop as children into adults, just like

1:01:39.640 --> 1:01:41.600
<v Speaker 2>you know, you say you may date someone that's similar

1:01:41.600 --> 1:01:46.040
<v Speaker 2>to your father. It's just the psychology around the first

1:01:46.080 --> 1:01:49.920
<v Speaker 2>female relationship as a boy is generally the mother. The

1:01:49.960 --> 1:01:53.880
<v Speaker 2>first real intimate male relationship for a female child and

1:01:53.960 --> 1:01:57.640
<v Speaker 2>vice versa is the father, and so these you know,

1:01:57.720 --> 1:02:01.080
<v Speaker 2>as a child, there's no there's really we don't understand

1:02:01.080 --> 1:02:03.919
<v Speaker 2>fully the concept of like a romantic love, a sexual love,

1:02:04.000 --> 1:02:06.200
<v Speaker 2>or a platonic love. It's just love. So there's like

1:02:06.240 --> 1:02:09.280
<v Speaker 2>an intimacy there. So I think that the Obviously the

1:02:09.280 --> 1:02:13.520
<v Speaker 2>psychology behind it has truth. I think it's like sigment Freud.

1:02:14.200 --> 1:02:16.480
<v Speaker 2>I forgot whose study it is, but it's a pretty like.

1:02:17.680 --> 1:02:21.200
<v Speaker 2>It's a pretty like referred often referred to psychology study,

1:02:21.400 --> 1:02:22.680
<v Speaker 2>and obviously there's truth there.

1:02:23.400 --> 1:02:25.560
<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to google it, and all coming up is

1:02:25.600 --> 1:02:27.000
<v Speaker 1>why kids kill parents?

1:02:28.480 --> 1:02:31.680
<v Speaker 2>Like, oh shit, I'm trying to sound smart, but I

1:02:31.680 --> 1:02:36.160
<v Speaker 2>can't remember the fucking the fucking man who made this theory.

1:02:36.200 --> 1:02:41.480
<v Speaker 2>But no, there's definitely intimacy, Like there's a form of intimacy,

1:02:41.560 --> 1:02:44.120
<v Speaker 2>but it's obviously not I don't think it's sexual and

1:02:44.160 --> 1:02:46.840
<v Speaker 2>I think as a child you don't understand the difference,

1:02:46.920 --> 1:02:49.320
<v Speaker 2>so the lines are blurred. But there is no really

1:02:49.400 --> 1:02:50.760
<v Speaker 2>sexuality because you're just a kid.

1:02:51.360 --> 1:02:52.920
<v Speaker 3>I want when I was like your kid.

1:02:52.880 --> 1:02:56.240
<v Speaker 1>Like wanting to like like touch your tits all the time.

1:02:56.320 --> 1:02:58.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I mean, it's just like a form of intimacy

1:02:58.240 --> 1:03:01.680
<v Speaker 2>and sensuality. When I was five, I thought I should

1:03:01.760 --> 1:03:04.360
<v Speaker 2>kiss my dad with tongue because I saw my mom

1:03:04.400 --> 1:03:05.920
<v Speaker 2>do it.

1:03:06.000 --> 1:03:07.840
<v Speaker 3>Okay I did.

1:03:07.880 --> 1:03:10.320
<v Speaker 2>I didn't warn him. I was just like in my mind, Okay,

1:03:10.320 --> 1:03:11.840
<v Speaker 2>so this is the only thing I could think of,

1:03:11.880 --> 1:03:13.760
<v Speaker 2>because this is the true thoughts of my five year

1:03:13.800 --> 1:03:16.440
<v Speaker 2>old self, and it was like, huh, maybe I should

1:03:16.440 --> 1:03:17.840
<v Speaker 2>try that. I didn't say let me should talk to

1:03:17.880 --> 1:03:19.160
<v Speaker 2>him about it first. I was like, let me just

1:03:19.200 --> 1:03:21.640
<v Speaker 2>try it and see is that was that what's supposed

1:03:21.680 --> 1:03:23.320
<v Speaker 2>to happen? Because I saw it happen. It was just

1:03:23.360 --> 1:03:27.440
<v Speaker 2>like trial and error. So I just was like and

1:03:27.440 --> 1:03:33.440
<v Speaker 2>he was like, what are you doing? No, no, all right,

1:03:33.880 --> 1:03:36.200
<v Speaker 2>So that's what I learned. It's also like I was

1:03:36.240 --> 1:03:37.919
<v Speaker 2>five and I was like, huh, I wonder if hell

1:03:38.040 --> 1:03:40.520
<v Speaker 2>is a bad word, and I wasn't sure, and instead

1:03:40.520 --> 1:03:42.160
<v Speaker 2>of asking, I just said what the hell are you doing?

1:03:42.720 --> 1:03:44.480
<v Speaker 2>And they were like, what the fuck are you talking about?

1:03:45.680 --> 1:03:48.280
<v Speaker 2>And then I learned. You know, it's just like the

1:03:48.520 --> 1:03:52.880
<v Speaker 2>theory of like learning and understanding. Well, yeah, intimacy as

1:03:53.400 --> 1:03:55.760
<v Speaker 2>a form of a new human You know, you're in

1:03:55.760 --> 1:03:58.560
<v Speaker 2>this world and like there's these social constructs and these

1:03:58.560 --> 1:04:02.040
<v Speaker 2>things of love and romance for obvious reasons, and you know,

1:04:02.120 --> 1:04:04.680
<v Speaker 2>you just don't really fully understand that concept as a child,

1:04:04.760 --> 1:04:08.080
<v Speaker 2>and so you're just exploring love and intimacy in a

1:04:09.000 --> 1:04:14.040
<v Speaker 2>rather innocent way. Not that I ever tried to kiss

1:04:14.080 --> 1:04:16.480
<v Speaker 2>my dad like that ever. Again, I'm just I was

1:04:16.640 --> 1:04:17.920
<v Speaker 2>just point of reference.

1:04:19.360 --> 1:04:22.080
<v Speaker 3>Thanks for thanks for sharing that, babe. I really appreciate that.

1:04:22.120 --> 1:04:23.640
<v Speaker 3>I'm so glad that you got that up.

1:04:23.920 --> 1:04:26.800
<v Speaker 2>I'll never forget it. I just was like, oh no, okay.

1:04:28.080 --> 1:04:29.520
<v Speaker 2>I don't think he yelled at me. He was just like,

1:04:29.520 --> 1:04:30.560
<v Speaker 2>what are you doing? Oh my god?

1:04:30.600 --> 1:04:33.120
<v Speaker 3>This must have been a fucking hilarious moment as a parent.

1:04:33.880 --> 1:04:34.680
<v Speaker 3>Can you imagine?

1:04:35.000 --> 1:04:36.680
<v Speaker 2>I wonder if he remembers. I wonder if I should

1:04:36.680 --> 1:04:37.880
<v Speaker 2>ask him. Maybe.

1:04:38.040 --> 1:04:41.760
<v Speaker 1>Some one said, can you speak about rebuilding relationships after

1:04:42.560 --> 1:04:43.560
<v Speaker 1>narcissist abuse?

1:04:43.800 --> 1:04:43.920
<v Speaker 7>Oh?

1:04:43.920 --> 1:04:46.919
<v Speaker 2>Wait, hold on. It's based on let's ask toy because

1:04:46.920 --> 1:04:51.080
<v Speaker 2>she's young and smart. It's based on Odipus Rex, who

1:04:51.160 --> 1:04:53.800
<v Speaker 2>was orphaned then fell in love with his mom, who

1:04:53.840 --> 1:04:56.800
<v Speaker 2>didn't know who he didn't know was his mom. It's

1:04:56.840 --> 1:04:59.320
<v Speaker 2>a Greek story. Okay, so I think there's also a

1:04:59.480 --> 1:05:02.560
<v Speaker 2>study to Okay, now, what are you saying? Sorry, I

1:05:02.560 --> 1:05:02.840
<v Speaker 2>don't know.

1:05:03.040 --> 1:05:05.120
<v Speaker 1>Someone would just said, how do you build relationships after,

1:05:05.360 --> 1:05:08.360
<v Speaker 1>you know, being in a narcissistic abusive relationship?

1:05:09.680 --> 1:05:13.160
<v Speaker 2>I think it takes a lot of self work, loan work.

1:05:13.280 --> 1:05:16.240
<v Speaker 2>It takes a lot of a loan work, A lot

1:05:16.440 --> 1:05:20.280
<v Speaker 2>of a loan work. I mentioned last. I don't know

1:05:20.320 --> 1:05:22.440
<v Speaker 2>in one of these episodes. Oh, I think today's episode.

1:05:22.520 --> 1:05:24.680
<v Speaker 2>I mentioned on today's episode if you haven't listened, and

1:05:24.760 --> 1:05:29.360
<v Speaker 2>now's the time that I was hanging out with an

1:05:29.360 --> 1:05:32.080
<v Speaker 2>old relationship and I was like, what the fuck was

1:05:32.120 --> 1:05:35.000
<v Speaker 2>I thinking? This is crazy? This is abuse? Why was

1:05:35.040 --> 1:05:37.640
<v Speaker 2>I taking this? And it was just like an epiphany.

1:05:38.000 --> 1:05:40.720
<v Speaker 2>But I've done so much self work and come so

1:05:40.880 --> 1:05:44.360
<v Speaker 2>far from that because I was so broken, and you know,

1:05:44.440 --> 1:05:46.440
<v Speaker 2>it just takes like and I still got in a

1:05:46.480 --> 1:05:50.160
<v Speaker 2>relationship with the narcissist. So it's just constant, constant work

1:05:50.200 --> 1:05:52.440
<v Speaker 2>of recognizing it and recognizing it when you're not valuing

1:05:52.440 --> 1:05:55.360
<v Speaker 2>yourself and putting yourself first, and then removing yourself and

1:05:55.360 --> 1:05:58.000
<v Speaker 2>being okay, removing yourself faster and faster every time you

1:05:58.040 --> 1:06:00.520
<v Speaker 2>recognize the red flags. Amen.

1:06:02.480 --> 1:06:05.920
<v Speaker 1>Also check out our episode with Megan Doherty. She's a

1:06:06.000 --> 1:06:12.080
<v Speaker 1>narcissist expert, loved bomb m D. He leaves her Instagram.

1:06:12.480 --> 1:06:13.480
<v Speaker 1>Is there a foot person in here?

1:06:13.560 --> 1:06:13.680
<v Speaker 4>Uh?

1:06:13.720 --> 1:06:13.959
<v Speaker 2>Huh?

1:06:14.000 --> 1:06:14.640
<v Speaker 3>Oh?

1:06:14.800 --> 1:06:18.880
<v Speaker 2>Should we Erica got my feet famous? Because Eric's feet

1:06:18.920 --> 1:06:21.080
<v Speaker 2>or famous? This is not a good Check out my

1:06:21.120 --> 1:06:30.200
<v Speaker 2>wiki page. If you're on Patreon, you will see see

1:06:30.560 --> 1:06:34.160
<v Speaker 2>am my feet clean on the bottom. Oh oh mine, Okay,

1:06:34.640 --> 1:06:38.960
<v Speaker 2>that was for you too, man or woman. I don't know, Okay,

1:06:39.000 --> 1:06:42.960
<v Speaker 2>I think that's enough. Oh yeah, okay. Toy is so smart. Okay,

1:06:43.000 --> 1:06:45.800
<v Speaker 2>shout out to Tory because she's my favorite, one of

1:06:46.080 --> 1:06:49.880
<v Speaker 2>our favorite listeners for our og listeners. She said, the

1:06:49.920 --> 1:06:52.840
<v Speaker 2>study is Freud. I knew it. But he's a weirdo. Okay,

1:06:53.000 --> 1:06:55.400
<v Speaker 2>I didn't know that and had a bunch of outlandish

1:06:55.480 --> 1:06:59.000
<v Speaker 2>claims about pedophilia. H okay, well, maybe we'll scratch that.

1:06:59.200 --> 1:07:02.200
<v Speaker 2>He wasn't smart her mind. Tory said, he's not the one.

1:07:02.200 --> 1:07:04.200
<v Speaker 2>He's not it. Okay, Well, you're right, Tory, fuck him.

1:07:04.200 --> 1:07:10.640
<v Speaker 2>Fund that guy for one, do more research. I figured

1:07:10.680 --> 1:07:13.840
<v Speaker 2>out why menche. It's scientifically believable. Me too. They're not

1:07:14.120 --> 1:07:22.640
<v Speaker 2>as evolved, okay, but they're genetically the dish genetically disposition

1:07:22.760 --> 1:07:26.320
<v Speaker 2>disposition to lie, that's why they cheat. Okay.

1:07:26.400 --> 1:07:26.600
<v Speaker 6>Well,