Speaker 1: Misspelling with Tori Spelling and iHeartRadio Podcast. Okay, so my
Speaker 1: friend and OMG co star Amy Sugarman is coming on
Speaker 1: today to Misspelling. Super excited to talk to you about life,
Speaker 1: give you an update.
Speaker 2: How are you? How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm I'm good.
Speaker 2: No, yeah, okay, before we talk about you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry to Can we acknowledge that you're wearing pink
Speaker 1: and I'm wearing green. We're ready for plan this and
Speaker 1: we do a rewatch of nine two.
Speaker 2: Can we also all goes in the shower three minutes ago? Okay,
Speaker 2: before we talk about what everything we were going to
Speaker 2: talk about today, can I ask you about all these
Speaker 2: articles from last week about Kathleen Robertson. I mean, there
Speaker 2: was a lot of lost, sick up as they say
Speaker 2: about this incident or incidents. I don't know if it
Speaker 2: was one time or multiple times on the set of
Speaker 2: nine O two one.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, So, oh my gosh. So I saw it too,
Speaker 1: just like everyone else, and I was like, oh MG,
Speaker 1: like this is wild.
Speaker 2: I didn't dig deep into all the articles, but I
Speaker 2: did see the headlines talking about what happened during her
Speaker 2: time on nine O two one oh, and I just
Speaker 2: wondered if you've talked to her, do you know any like?
Speaker 2: What was all that?
Speaker 1: Right? So she did our friend Pete who does the
Speaker 1: other nine O two one, Oh, okay, Yeah, I was wondering.
Speaker 2: I got it.
Speaker 1: He does another podcast called the Slice of Life, and
Speaker 1: he interviewed her. So I saw all the press, Like
Speaker 1: the press was blowing up right talking about.
Speaker 2: What were the main headlines, cut.
Speaker 1: Photos, polaroids from wardrobe that she found in the makeup trailer. Yeah,
Speaker 1: during her time there, bullying that was so harsh that
Speaker 1: she left. That's why she finally left in season seven.
Speaker 3: WHOA.
Speaker 2: I sort of assumed it was in the beginning. This
Speaker 2: is one of the reasons she left the show.
Speaker 1: Correct, That's what the article is saying. WHOA And I, honestly.
Speaker 2: I thought it was not to be funny, but I
Speaker 2: thought it was a bad story, not to.
Speaker 1: Be fun to no. And I remember when you, me
Speaker 1: and Jen were talking about it, saying, I said, you know,
Speaker 1: she left on her own. She wanted to go out
Speaker 1: and do other things. I didn't remember it being because
Speaker 1: of bullying, but I know that it was intense what
Speaker 1: she came into. What you know, any female came into
Speaker 1: on that set. But the cut of Polaroids. I do know.
Speaker 2: About whoa I do so.
Speaker 1: She So she.
Speaker 2: Just found them obviously hurt her feelings and probably was scary.
Speaker 1: As you can imagine.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it would be. It seems like a horror movie.
Speaker 3: It does.
Speaker 1: And I think she handled it really well. And she says,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm tough. I can get through it. But
Speaker 1: it was a lot. It was the biggest show in
Speaker 1: the world, and I was so excited to be a
Speaker 1: part of it. She's a Canadian actress. She had come,
Speaker 1: you know, come to the US.
Speaker 2: It was her first role for years at this point.
Speaker 1: When the Polaroids were cut up.
Speaker 2: No, when she left, you would think that she would
Speaker 2: really had, you know, become a part of the group
Speaker 2: that it was, wouldn't still be going on the bullying? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 2: She even says that in the interview.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Wait, go back to this.
Speaker 3: Photo the Polaroids. So I actually texted.
Speaker 1: Her on a couple of nights ago and I said,
Speaker 1: you told the Polaroids story. She's like, I still have
Speaker 1: so much anxiety.
Speaker 2: Around thirty thirty years later, she'd.
Speaker 1: Be atsd from it. She said, you know, I've never
Speaker 1: said it. I don't I don't want that out there, Yeah,
Speaker 1: for for that person, and I get that me too.
Speaker 2: Of course, of course, how does she know who did it?
Speaker 2: Did the person admit it or she just thinks she knows?
Speaker 1: Ah, there were the people in makeup, in hair, and
Speaker 1: in wardrobe all kind of vouch for who.
Speaker 3: I guess they thought did it?
Speaker 2: Okay, got it? And this was when she joined the cast.
Speaker 2: I mean, it's interesting timing because there was another story
Speaker 2: that got a lot of traction last week about another
Speaker 2: sort not exactly that, but on a different show.
Speaker 3: Way, tell me about that because you mentioned that in
Speaker 3: our text.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't have any inform other than Kaylee
Speaker 2: Quoco said it in an interview, so I feel comfortable
Speaker 2: saying that she talked about it too. But I guess
Speaker 2: my question is why is it like that? Are people
Speaker 2: worried when someone new comes in? Because knowing work, right,
Speaker 2: I would think it would be fun when someone new
Speaker 2: comes in, because you're like, I have to be with
Speaker 2: these people all the time, so it would be, in
Speaker 2: my thought fun when as someone new comes. What is
Speaker 2: the motivation for people being cold or mean or on
Speaker 2: a set? Because you hear about it so much. Here's
Speaker 2: what I.
Speaker 1: Think, only because I've been through it. It was really
Speaker 1: hard for me coming on to stay by the bell, yeah,
Speaker 1: because you know, I was the new girl. It was
Speaker 1: we were all on our teens and it was tricky,
Speaker 1: and I remember, definitely till this day. I remember who
Speaker 1: was nice to me and who wasn't as nice. They
Speaker 1: were all nice, but certain feelings. And because of that
Speaker 1: experience I was once I was on nine o two
Speaker 1: and oho, I was like any guest star that comes
Speaker 1: on your male or female, I'm gonna just like run
Speaker 1: and embrace them with open arms and be like, oh
Speaker 1: you know. So I kept that in my mind because
Speaker 1: you have experience, because they're all there to do.
Speaker 2: So sorry to laugh at that, but you played the
Speaker 2: you play the biggest nerd on the safe with the
Speaker 2: bell that like, why would any girl be like you
Speaker 2: know what? I feel nervous about that girl.
Speaker 1: So here's the thing, is that what it comes from,
Speaker 1: I don't believe it's that. I don't know because I've
Speaker 1: never been that girl. I've never been a bully. Like
Speaker 1: even in real high school, I was the girl that
Speaker 1: either are different groups. I could float to any group
Speaker 1: and I just got along with people but I don't know.
Speaker 3: If it's I don't know if you feel threatened, or it's.
Speaker 2: Just is it like, who is this person coming to
Speaker 2: our cool character? Or like maybe really kind of odd?
Speaker 1: I don't I just know that I never wanted to
Speaker 1: be that person. So of course when Kathleen came, I
Speaker 1: was like a but then we ended up going beyond
Speaker 1: them being best friends.
Speaker 2: Was the part that I find so interesting is that
Speaker 2: this impacted what her decision to leave. Did she never
Speaker 2: feel like she was truly a part of the group
Speaker 2: or did she really leave because she wanted to go
Speaker 2: do other things? And look, you know, the character had
Speaker 2: kind of gone to where it was going to go.
Speaker 1: But I mean, I don't know how what did she say.
Speaker 2: When you when you don't have to reveal the text,
Speaker 2: But like, I wonder what made her just decide like
Speaker 2: I'm just going to sell this, sell what tell this?
Speaker 1: She's oh my god, look in my brain. I think
Speaker 1: it's something that's always bothered her. And she's a mom now,
Speaker 1: I mean, raising two strong men, but still she wants
Speaker 1: to set an example and be like it's not okay.
Speaker 1: She is a director now, you know, writer, director, producer
Speaker 1: and working with a lot of young females and she
Speaker 1: wants to be a real powerful figure and advocate for them.
Speaker 1: And I think she's just like I held this in
Speaker 1: all these years, like and was like, that's what you
Speaker 1: were supposed to do in this business. But now everyone
Speaker 1: is kind of coming clean and talking about mental health
Speaker 1: and how it is affected personally and professionally, and so
Speaker 1: I just feel like she thought it was the right time,
Speaker 1: but it is. It's interesting to me that she's always
Speaker 1: been so scarred by it and then oh, I would be.
Speaker 2: I mean, I think you think about things. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: can't remember something that happened in seventh grade that I'm
Speaker 2: still like.
Speaker 1: Oh, well, for sure, and then she had to repress
Speaker 1: it all those years, and then I still think about
Speaker 1: of course, And it probably felt very freeing for her
Speaker 1: to be like this happened. It wasn't just all amazing
Speaker 1: things on that show, yeah, because everyone's like, oh my god.
Speaker 1: And also probably when she was younger, it probably felt
Speaker 1: like people should were like, you know, you should be
Speaker 1: so grateful, and she was grateful, right, But so if
Speaker 1: I'm so grateful, why am I seeming like I'm complaining
Speaker 1: about bullying on the set? But yeah, but yeah. I
Speaker 1: text her and I was like, wow, I was like,
Speaker 1: you revealed the story.
Speaker 3: I was like, you.
Speaker 1: Didn't reveal who it was. We know who it was.
Speaker 1: And she goes, no, I know, I know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, she does talk about your friendship in that
Speaker 2: same interview. I do want to acknowledge that, like she
Speaker 2: talks about.
Speaker 3: That, you have to believe.
Speaker 1: I guess at some point that people that mistreat people
Speaker 1: that their time comes that eventually someone will speak out
Speaker 1: and say because she wasn't the only one, so.
Speaker 2: And y'all were young. I mean, I know that's not
Speaker 2: an excuse, but it's like, maybe, of course, yes, yes, yeah,
Speaker 2: just behave in when you're age and all the things
Speaker 2: are happening. Yeah, of course, do things that you wouldn't
Speaker 2: do ten years later, twenty years later, obviously, thirty years later.
Speaker 3: I agree with that.
Speaker 1: I mean, that wasn't my experience, but yes, I agree
Speaker 1: with that. When people are young, they do things that
Speaker 1: are foolish and come in other people's expenses, and then yeah,
Speaker 1: years later they're like, oh, why do you.
Speaker 2: Have a regret from that time? Something that you wish
Speaker 2: you could change. Interesting.
Speaker 3: I wish I had stood up for myself.
Speaker 2: More, or what about others and my other cousiners because
Speaker 2: you're always the friend, but maybe you should have I
Speaker 2: don't know. I'm not speaking for you. I'm just asking
Speaker 2: if you have anything.
Speaker 1: I was so like, I was so Donna, like the
Speaker 1: middleman with everybody, friends with everybody, and then you know,
Speaker 1: but I it would have. I don't feel like I
Speaker 1: was prepared enough as a human to be able to
Speaker 1: go to people and say, hey, this person's scared of you,
Speaker 1: and this person like maybe it would help if you
Speaker 1: just talk to them more.
Speaker 2: Did they keep that kind of stuff from your dad
Speaker 2: or would people tell him what was going on or
Speaker 2: did they try to like don't let Aaron know.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure about that. I was because my dad
Speaker 1: didn't ever with me want to get involved right with
Speaker 1: other castmates and taught it and I never would tell
Speaker 1: him anything. So now I don't think so, but I
Speaker 1: don't know. Or maybe there were conversations and they were
Speaker 1: like just handle it, you know, right, like handle it
Speaker 1: on sex. We had producers on set at all times. Yeah,
Speaker 1: the polaroid thing was such a big thing. I have
Speaker 1: to imagine that it him so everything they.
Speaker 2: Knew about it. Yeah, whoa yeah, it's kind of it
Speaker 2: seems like for some reason, I keep thinking that is
Speaker 2: this scream? Do you know what I mean? Like it
Speaker 2: seems kind of like a horror movie a little bit like.
Speaker 1: Oh, I mean it's you know, my brain goes there,
Speaker 1: so I'm like, oh, this would make it good?
Speaker 2: Do you hate that things like that come out now
Speaker 2: that sort of tarnish the good parts of nine o
Speaker 2: two one zero? Like how big it? You know? Like
Speaker 2: I think about just still now people know all of you, right,
Speaker 2: do you does it make you sad a little bit?
Speaker 2: Or or are you like it wasn't just fantasyland.
Speaker 1: I think with life in general, we tend to, once
Speaker 1: out of it, hold on to the good parts. I mean,
Speaker 1: they say it's why we keep having children, Like if
Speaker 1: we remember the horrid part of childbirth, we wouldn't do it.
Speaker 1: So you remember the good not the bad, or you know,
Speaker 1: our bodies just repress it. But yeah, the good for me,
Speaker 1: the good outweigh the bad. And I think for everyone,
Speaker 1: including Kathleen, she had some amazing moments there. I mean,
Speaker 1: it was our formative years. We had great times. But
Speaker 1: I think it is important at some point to acknowledge
Speaker 1: when things happen and are not good. I haven't gotten
Speaker 1: there yet, but you know, so when you.
Speaker 2: See something like those articles, yeah, I know we kind
Speaker 2: of talked about this earlier, but what do you what
Speaker 2: does it make you feel?
Speaker 1: I mean, I gotta be honest. I was like, good
Speaker 1: for her, I because I know it was a big
Speaker 1: looing thing in her life and for decades, and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh, I'm glad she's talking about it. I
Speaker 1: was nervous at first because I was like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: she get a name, like what's going to happen? And
Speaker 1: then she didn't, So I was proud of that.
Speaker 2: I kind of agree with her on that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, me too, me too, me too, I mean yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I'd be scared to name my bully.
Speaker 2: Because also naming it, I don't know. My reaction is
Speaker 2: like then it becomes something different than what I think
Speaker 2: she was trying to do with it.
Speaker 1: Yes, no, I agree, I agree. And you know, it's
Speaker 1: just like Jessica Alba, who when I would say her experience, does.
Speaker 2: That make you think there was some truth to what
Speaker 2: Jessica Alba said? Yeah, yeah, but.
Speaker 1: Yes, but she wouldn't name who it was.
Speaker 2: No, right, But I feel like.
Speaker 1: So it put us all in a like a thing
Speaker 1: because it's like, oh my gosh, wait, Like I like.
Speaker 2: I would want to what's me. It wasn't me, It wasn't.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I was like, she knows it's not me,
Speaker 1: Like it's I, yeah, not our story to tell, but
Speaker 1: it definitely wasn't us. So it's interesting because it's like, well,
Speaker 1: it's always consistently I mean related to the same person.
Speaker 1: So I wonder at some point is someone going to
Speaker 1: be you know, like with the Me Too movement, going
Speaker 1: to be call out bullies you know from their shows
Speaker 1: or movies, and then people are going to come out
Speaker 1: of the woodwork and be like, yes, that happened with me.
Speaker 2: What if the person and I have no idea who
Speaker 2: the person is, I just want to say that I
Speaker 2: don't know. Yeah, what if the person said sorry, like
Speaker 2: I was young, I was dumb. Would that.
Speaker 3: What you just said that?
Speaker 1: And my whole body felt good inside because it was
Speaker 1: probably thinking about people's lines yeah, like they said, oh
Speaker 1: my god, I don't even and maybe they don't even
Speaker 1: recall doing it correctly correct and it's just yeah, and
Speaker 1: this goes for it anything anything.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you should say sorry for things you
Speaker 2: messed up and thank you for things when which I
Speaker 2: really liked about Kathleen, she clearly said Tory was it wasn't.
Speaker 2: Tory was the opposite. And so you want to also
Speaker 2: acknowledge people that treat people well. You don't want to
Speaker 2: just be the one that's like, all this person's mean,
Speaker 2: and I'm like that. I think people have their reasons, right.
Speaker 2: It doesn't forgive it, but you don't know what they
Speaker 2: were experiencing or there's always a couple sides to every story.
Speaker 2: And I'm not saying that's the case here, but there's
Speaker 2: always of course, oh yeah, of course, gosh that would
Speaker 2: be Does it make you didn't make you feel terrible again,
Speaker 2: it sort of made me feel like, oh man, thirty
Speaker 2: years later.
Speaker 1: No, because Kathleen and I are still friends, so we
Speaker 1: kind of talk about it all the time, like over
Speaker 1: the years. And yeah, again, it's going to happen in
Speaker 1: any place, any workplace. Not everyone's going to be friends.
Speaker 1: But you all are professional and you do your job
Speaker 1: and you get through it, and we all have to,
Speaker 1: you know, acknowledge that. And I think when we're young,
Speaker 1: we don't know, so we walk into a place and
Speaker 1: we're like, oh my god, we're all going to be friends,
Speaker 1: and it just sadly isn't the case. And as adults now,
Speaker 1: I think it prepares us. It's like how high school
Speaker 1: prepares us for the workforce. It prepares us to go
Speaker 1: out and be like, okay, because you know, in high school,
Speaker 1: you get bullied, you're not friends with everyone. It just
Speaker 1: the way it works. And then we're like, okay, when
Speaker 1: we're out in the workforce, we're being paid. We show
Speaker 1: up every day, we do our job, and there's going
Speaker 1: to be people that are super nice and friendly, and
Speaker 1: we're going to make friends out of work, and there's
Speaker 1: going to be people that we just don't get along with,
Speaker 1: but we suck it up and work with them.
Speaker 2: I just have a weird question. Is it a Hollywood
Speaker 2: thing because or an on set thing or an actor thing?
Speaker 2: Because I don't I've worked at the same I heart
Speaker 2: for thirty years and I do not have one example
Speaker 2: of anybody who has ever bullied I don't have. I
Speaker 2: don't have one. So it's like, is more of an
Speaker 2: actor thing?
Speaker 1: I don't know?
Speaker 3: Any different?
Speaker 1: The one job I've ever had is being an actor.
Speaker 1: Do you know what I mean, or being you know,
Speaker 1: a producer, like doing that entertainment. Maybe it is.
Speaker 2: Other than Saved by the Bell. Had you ever experienced
Speaker 2: it on any other set? I have really Yeah, maybe actor.
Speaker 1: It might be. And I've never thought of it that
Speaker 1: way because I don't have any.
Speaker 2: Saying it, but I've never had I mean, and I
Speaker 2: were like.
Speaker 1: Troue Beverly Hills.
Speaker 2: I had it.
Speaker 1: I was fourteen.
Speaker 2: Were they mean to you? I thought you were the
Speaker 2: cool kid on that movie. Uh uh, oh you're the nerd.
Speaker 1: Because I was in you know, there's the Beverly Hills Troop.
Speaker 1: I was Culver City.
Speaker 2: Oh was that your dad's movie? Or no?
Speaker 1: It was not.
Speaker 2: You just got the part.
Speaker 1: I imagine that. You guys. I can act and I
Speaker 1: auditioned for something and I get apart.
Speaker 2: Right, So people were mean, do you think there was
Speaker 2: part of me?
Speaker 1: I'm not kidding. There's still trolls that I'll be like
Speaker 1: last year when I was like, oh, this TV movie
Speaker 1: and they're like someone's like, well, I'm sure her dad
Speaker 1: made it. I'm like, really, rest in peace, Dad, But
Speaker 1: you know he passed away nineteen years ago, you know
Speaker 1: what I mean, Like pretty sure he didn't produce it.
Speaker 2: I did not mean that. When I asked, I was curious, well,
Speaker 2: do you think, because in some ways that feels method,
Speaker 2: Like where the troop Beverly Hills was mean to the
Speaker 2: were you in the better troop? The troop that was like, yeah,
Speaker 2: all the badges, yes, yeah, okay, God, maybe that was.
Speaker 1: Method method they all hung out. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: It's happening.
Speaker 1: It's happened in some form on every set I've worked
Speaker 1: on until I became the ringleader? Is that right?
Speaker 2: Does the lead sort of the lead determine how the
Speaker 2: set is?
Speaker 1: Bingo? Yeah, we're coming to a conclusion here.
Speaker 2: Okay, Yes, God, I heard Jennifer Garner telling the most
Speaker 2: lovely story about Matthew McConaughey. Did you see that?
Speaker 1: No? I didn't, But she's great.
Speaker 2: She couldn't the nicest person ever. Yes, And she tells
Speaker 2: this story. Everybody can look it up because it's not
Speaker 2: my story to tell about how amazing Matthew McConaughey was.
Speaker 2: And I almost cried. I was just like, whoa, you
Speaker 2: really get how one person can determine how it goes?
Speaker 2: And I get that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and you try your best It's interesting because Kathleen
Speaker 1: and I nine O two and zero and we definitely,
Speaker 1: you know, kind of I took her in under my wing,
Speaker 1: and there were others that didn't, and they kind of
Speaker 1: did their things together in different group being because it
Speaker 1: was a little cliquy me. I'm friends with everybody, of course.
Speaker 1: And then we worked together again in Scary Movie Too.
Speaker 2: Oh she was in that too.
Speaker 1: She was And we had lost touch for years just
Speaker 1: because we weren't working together anyway. We were reunited and
Speaker 1: we're like, oh my god, why did we lose our friendship?
Speaker 1: Like just yeah, not working together and the same thing. Right,
Speaker 1: reunited and it was like we had never left each other.
Speaker 1: And then we semi started to have the same experience,
Speaker 1: not to the degree on nine ers on that movie,
Speaker 1: on that movie where it was just like certain people
Speaker 1: had lunch together and certain like and it was me
Speaker 1: so me, Kathleen and Tim Curry.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: It became the best season.
Speaker 2: Maybe people thought, oh, they're too cool, I can't have
Speaker 2: lunch with them.
Speaker 1: I don't know, No, it wasn't our set, because keep
Speaker 1: in mind, the same people from Scary Movie one were
Speaker 1: two I.
Speaker 2: Still the lunch thing is like I can give a
Speaker 2: little people are gonna eat lunch. It's true, right, It's
Speaker 2: like to me, that's different than like finding photos cut up.
Speaker 1: Oh listen, and every single person she found from the
Speaker 1: cast of Scary Movie two was amazing.
Speaker 3: Right, they were great.
Speaker 2: Like I'm just saying, you don't know if people are
Speaker 2: like they're rewriting scripts at lunch, who knows. Like the
Speaker 2: lunch thing, I'm like.
Speaker 1: Female driven I'm talking about. I think this is a
Speaker 1: female driven sadly, wow, think I feel like that sucks.
Speaker 2: We need to change that.
Speaker 1: We do because all we talk about, especially nowadays, is
Speaker 1: sisterhood and female bonding. And women don't tear women down,
Speaker 1: but women tear women down the most, is what I
Speaker 1: found in my experience in life. I want that to
Speaker 1: change because I don't want that for us. We're the
Speaker 1: smarter ones.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, when.
Speaker 1: It's all said and done, we're the ones that are
Speaker 1: going to still be standing. So we all got to
Speaker 1: get along.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well I didn't get to what we were going
Speaker 2: to get to today, but we'll get to that.
Speaker 1: It made me feel bad, sad the entertainment that's how
Speaker 1: it rolls.
Speaker 2: No, just the all those articles I mean, all those
Speaker 2: articles made me feel real sad like and kind of like.
Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, I'm curious because you're a super fan. We
Speaker 1: know this of nine two, and I think I just.
Speaker 2: Did not in my mind, I'm like no, everyone, like
Speaker 2: I think my thing was like that can't be. That
Speaker 2: was my react. No, not that I don't believe her.
Speaker 2: I do, but it's like, no, what.
Speaker 1: You know. So it's interesting because you know, fans of
Speaker 1: the show that you know have for years been so
Speaker 1: like you know, like Darren Martin is a super fan,
Speaker 1: and you know there's so many others and they all
Speaker 1: kind of know the jam too. Oh really because they
Speaker 1: followed the show since way back through you know, they've
Speaker 1: been to conventions with us, They've been you know, they
Speaker 1: all for so many years. They've gotten to know all
Speaker 1: of the cast that they know. And like, I would
Speaker 1: never tell a fan and be like no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: like I want their dream to be alive, to be
Speaker 1: like everyone was perfect and we were all best friends
Speaker 1: and dah da dah, which from my perspective is true.
Speaker 2: But I know also everybody, I think about you and
Speaker 2: Brian and Ian and Jenny and Gabrielle and Jason. Yeah,
Speaker 2: all do feel like you all get along with each other.
Speaker 1: We do really well.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, so it's for me. I'm like, that
Speaker 2: can't be real.
Speaker 1: I know.
Speaker 2: Well, I guess some people when all the you always
Speaker 2: hear actors we're all best friends.
Speaker 1: But no, you're not. Here's the thing in this industry,
Speaker 1: I think we're scared to say who's not kind because
Speaker 1: we're like, oh god, well, what if that affects if
Speaker 1: my future? Like working?
Speaker 3: Sure, you don't want to be the right way, like
Speaker 3: everyone loves that person.
Speaker 1: I call bullshit. They weren't nice, Like you don't want
Speaker 1: to be that person because I don't want, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't want to not work. Someone asked me about
Speaker 1: an actor that's really big recently, and I kind of
Speaker 1: got in the bandwagon and being like, well yeah, we
Speaker 1: were like talking back and forth, Oh yeah, we know
Speaker 1: that he's not nice in it. And then I got
Speaker 1: super nervous. I was like, whoa wait, like no one
Speaker 1: else heard that, Like I don't want that to go anywhere,
Speaker 1: Like I want to work.
Speaker 2: For that guy.
Speaker 3: Right, it's like eight year Yeah, it's the old.
Speaker 2: If you don't have something nice to say, I don't
Speaker 2: say anything.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Oh boy ikes, Well, I know how to end this.
Speaker 1: I know, I really do like the thought of people
Speaker 1: saying this is this is the human that made me
Speaker 1: feel bad for one reason or another, and that person
Speaker 1: going back and saying I'm sorry, but let me from
Speaker 1: my perspective explain my life at the time, and then
Speaker 1: them walking away being like it's done. That's a cool notion.
Speaker 1: You should make another podcast with that.
Speaker 2: Well, I appreciate you telling everyone this, you know, just
Speaker 2: your thoughts. It's interesting to hear and definitely makes me, like,
Speaker 2: I don't know, it makes me want to be nice.
Speaker 2: I mean not everyone. I'm not nobody can be nice
Speaker 2: all the time, especially in business. Sometimes you have to
Speaker 2: be tough, but like it generally makes you want to
Speaker 2: be nice.
Speaker 1: Wait this about me, But do you think all of
Speaker 1: that and me being like I'm the nice one that
Speaker 1: Dada has carried through so much in my life that
Speaker 1: you know, I'm a people pleaser. We're trying to work
Speaker 1: on this and like stand up for myself and take ownership.
Speaker 1: Do you think I went overboard being nice because of that? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Of course. And I think it's tough because in business
Speaker 2: it's there's a fine line between being tough and being mean,
Speaker 2: and people can perceive toughness or accountability or you know,
Speaker 2: expecting a lot from people as mean. Correct, So it's
Speaker 2: really tough.
Speaker 1: That's right, actually when you're young.
Speaker 2: Because like I had something this morning where I had
Speaker 2: to write sort of a stern email and they'll think
Speaker 2: I'm mean, but really I was like.
Speaker 1: Hey, listen to me.
Speaker 2: No, it was just like, hey, you know, like if
Speaker 2: you're going to do that, that's okay, but you should
Speaker 2: call me and explain why. And it was like, let's
Speaker 2: I would do the same for you. So they're gonna
Speaker 2: think I mean, But really it was like, hey, I'm
Speaker 2: just being you know, accountable for how I would be
Speaker 2: and how you need to be. So I don't know,
Speaker 2: I think that's that's a whole conversation.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a difference between you and others that I
Speaker 1: have experienced things with that Hey, if you're just showing
Speaker 1: up being accountable, I would rather them be perceived as
Speaker 1: tough than mean, totally. Yeah, but they're not willing to
Speaker 1: take accountability for that behavior as like oh I did
Speaker 1: say it that way or I did experience this because
Speaker 1: of this, Like with you, you're completely honest about everything.
Speaker 1: So even when like tough love with me, I know
Speaker 1: that it's because we're friends.
Speaker 3: So to say it like you feel it.
Speaker 2: Which I do my best. I mean I have to
Speaker 2: because when you're like running a thing, you have to
Speaker 2: still have accountability and toughness and standards and expect a
Speaker 2: lot of people. But then you have to give that
Speaker 2: in return. And so I think, I think there's always
Speaker 2: a way to do it. There's a way to do
Speaker 2: there's got to be a way to do both. You
Speaker 2: do do it well.
Speaker 1: Because you're innately warm and you're likable.
Speaker 2: I try. I think I would just say, like say,
Speaker 2: say I was on the set, yeah, okay, yeah, it'd
Speaker 2: be interesting to me if somebody just said, hey, it's
Speaker 2: hard for me with new people. I'm glad you're here,
Speaker 2: you know, give me some time to get to know you. Like,
Speaker 2: sometimes it's better to just say that, because some people
Speaker 2: are not just going to be like extroverted and hugging
Speaker 2: the new person, right. They might be like, I want
Speaker 2: to get to know this person. But sometimes it's better
Speaker 2: to just be like, tell who you are in the truth,
Speaker 2: because some people might be shy, so they might just
Speaker 2: not be friends with the newcomer right away. Sure, sometimes
Speaker 2: they might just say, hey, I like to read in
Speaker 2: my trailer, don't. I don't want you to take that personally.
Speaker 2: I don't. I'm making it up. I don't know what.
Speaker 2: I don't know how to like. It's all kind of sucks.
Speaker 2: There's no way to like tie this up with a bow.
Speaker 2: So it's like, I guess thanks for telling us.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I'm gonna work on not people pleasing and
Speaker 1: being so I'm nice to the core, but I want
Speaker 1: to develop that side of running my business and being
Speaker 1: tough and being just there are another.
Speaker 3: Word for tough. Tough gets a bad rap.
Speaker 1: Let's redefine that word you said, accountable, which I like,
Speaker 1: but it's different, not just accountable.
Speaker 2: I don't know, this is a whole I know. I
Speaker 2: think we should continue the conversation because it's like, especially
Speaker 2: for women, it's like, yes, people just be like she's
Speaker 2: a mean beiald.
Speaker 1: Well, really it does go back to that that men.
Speaker 1: You know, men can be tough and they're like leaders.
Speaker 1: Women are tough and and they're bitches and there's that
Speaker 1: old school thing. But I feel like true, we are
Speaker 1: starting to change.
Speaker 2: But I mean, I think about it, every day. How
Speaker 2: do I convey this without being mean?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 2: Sometimes I just go I'm not trying to be mean.
Speaker 2: I don't know. Anyway, we'll talk more. We'll talk more
Speaker 2: in the next episode. I like it.
Speaker 1: No, I like this too.
Speaker 2: There's definitely experts on this topic. Yes, yeah, we'll get
Speaker 2: someone better than.
Speaker 1: You or me for sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, we'll talk to you later. You're the best,
Speaker 2: so