WEBVTT - LS Episode 482: Maneuvering Holiday's (Feat. Devyn Simone) 0:00:02.240 --> 0:00:05.080 What's dev' slip service. I'm answer like, yee, I'm JJ Maguire, 0:00:05.200 --> 0:00:07.960 I'm Jordie Jor, I'm Jazz and Brand, and I'm Devin 0:00:08.000 --> 0:00:11.799 simooney Man. This is the perfect time of the year 0:00:11.840 --> 0:00:15.319 for this because Devin Simone who is a match maker, 0:00:15.360 --> 0:00:19.280 relationship expert, all of the things you know her from TV. Also, 0:00:19.720 --> 0:00:21.560 we're so honored to have you here because this is 0:00:21.600 --> 0:00:24.320 a stressful time for some people when it comes to 0:00:24.360 --> 0:00:27.640 relationships and dating. So for clarity, who hear a single 0:00:28.240 --> 0:00:29.120 okay two of. 0:00:29.080 --> 0:00:31.240 Us, Yeah, we need help. 0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:37.040 And Devin and we do want to say congratulations because 0:00:37.080 --> 0:00:38.880 I know you've been married for how long now. 0:00:38.800 --> 0:00:40.400 Like about a year and a half? 0:00:40.479 --> 0:00:44.760 Okay, thank you? 0:00:44.800 --> 0:00:45.879 Designed for myself. 0:00:46.600 --> 0:00:49.159 You know, sometimes people try to discredit, like if you're 0:00:49.200 --> 0:00:51.239 not married, they'd be like, oh, how are you offering? 0:00:51.560 --> 0:00:54.320 You know, how is that for you? Because people tend to. 0:00:54.400 --> 0:00:55.240 They do do that. 0:00:55.360 --> 0:00:59.080 And I say, you know, no one can help you 0:00:59.080 --> 0:01:00.640 get the ring better than I can, because I've got 0:01:00.680 --> 0:01:04.560 it multiple times your house. 0:01:06.800 --> 0:01:08.560 But I wanted it to be the right person. 0:01:08.680 --> 0:01:11.200 So I waited to actually get married and walk down 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:13.080 the aisle with the right person. And I waited for 0:01:13.560 --> 0:01:17.280 my perfect person. But I think you know they're they're 0:01:17.319 --> 0:01:21.000 good dating experts and relationship experts who were just knowledgeable 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:22.440 because we geek out on it. 0:01:22.480 --> 0:01:23.399 Like honestly, I. 0:01:23.520 --> 0:01:27.720 Love learning why we connect with certain people, how it 0:01:27.880 --> 0:01:31.000 changes every year. Like to me, that's just always been fascinating. 0:01:31.120 --> 0:01:34.640 So don't rule someone out just because they're single. But look, 0:01:34.640 --> 0:01:36.560 if they haven't been able to hold down a relationship 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:38.959 for like decades, I might side eye them and not 0:01:39.040 --> 0:01:39.720 take their advice. 0:01:40.080 --> 0:01:45.480 Okay, all right, well so Gigi you're single now, yes, still, 0:01:45.680 --> 0:01:48.240 Gigi's been through a lot too, she's gotten a well. 0:01:49.080 --> 0:01:52.080 Yeah, she was engaged. We were engaged. 0:01:52.440 --> 0:01:54.800 We did see the jeweler, but I never got the ring. 0:01:55.000 --> 0:01:56.880 It only lasted sixty five days. 0:01:57.080 --> 0:02:01.840 Okay, the relationship okay, so it was like fire, very 0:02:02.000 --> 0:02:03.680 like Verry fat can happen. 0:02:03.720 --> 0:02:04.720 It's just as fast as that ended. 0:02:04.880 --> 0:02:07.240 What do you what are your thoughts about that, Devin? 0:02:07.600 --> 0:02:10.720 If you think about somebody meeting someone, some people will 0:02:10.760 --> 0:02:14.160 believe in love at first sight. Right, And like Gigi 0:02:14.160 --> 0:02:17.560 got engaged very quickly, like three days she came like 0:02:17.600 --> 0:02:19.040 I saw her, and then the next time I saw her, 0:02:19.040 --> 0:02:22.919 she was engaged to somebody we'd never heard of. That 0:02:23.360 --> 0:02:25.600 it was wild, But what do you think about that, 0:02:25.639 --> 0:02:27.760 Like if someone comes to you like I met this person. 0:02:27.840 --> 0:02:29.600 Three days later they're like, we're getting married. 0:02:29.919 --> 0:02:31.920 I think it's it's totally fine to have all the 0:02:31.960 --> 0:02:35.440 feelings but still take your time to actually move forward, 0:02:35.520 --> 0:02:37.720 which obviously you did and you saw some things. 0:02:37.520 --> 0:02:41.639 That ultimately you were like, yeah, I. 0:02:41.639 --> 0:02:45.560 Say, of the sparks, because sparks can lead to fire damage, 0:02:45.600 --> 0:02:47.480 Like people are looking for that, like. 0:02:47.440 --> 0:02:48.680 Oh, we felt it right away. 0:02:48.840 --> 0:02:51.720 Yeah, but the slow burn is good too, Like that's 0:02:51.760 --> 0:02:55.120 something that has longevity, so slow don't rule that out. 0:02:55.440 --> 0:02:57.200 Yeah, I think that's the lesson that I did learn. 0:02:57.280 --> 0:02:59.280 It's like, okay, girl, that was cute and all, but 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:03.240 take your time because it wasn't clearly wasn't right. 0:03:03.240 --> 0:03:04.080 This is a year ago. 0:03:04.520 --> 0:03:07.400 And sometimes it's fun too, Like feeling like you just 0:03:07.440 --> 0:03:11.240 got head over heels into something. Maybe you're also getting 0:03:11.280 --> 0:03:13.600 over something else, and that can also get us to 0:03:13.680 --> 0:03:17.520 feel like this is you know, it's like a replacement situation. 0:03:18.360 --> 0:03:21.640 I'm enjoying being single for the most part, but I 0:03:21.680 --> 0:03:22.280 am start. 0:03:22.080 --> 0:03:23.160 Getting a little like bored. 0:03:23.560 --> 0:03:25.520 Okay, I don't want to use the word lonely because 0:03:26.000 --> 0:03:27.320 you know, ain't nobody going to me? 0:03:27.520 --> 0:03:28.160 You can call someone. 0:03:28.760 --> 0:03:33.200 Yeah, but I'm bored, like I want you know, I 0:03:33.280 --> 0:03:35.120 want like the field. 0:03:35.280 --> 0:03:36.440 But do you are you bored? 0:03:36.520 --> 0:03:39.240 Like you want to winter cuddle buddy, you know someone 0:03:39.280 --> 0:03:43.000 that's just kind of like fun and that you to 0:03:43.120 --> 0:03:46.040 keep you occupied now or you like, I'm open because 0:03:46.040 --> 0:03:46.880 I want something. 0:03:47.120 --> 0:03:49.080 I want to I want to date with the purpose. 0:03:49.560 --> 0:03:52.080 Okay, yeah, okay, yeah, I want to date with like 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:55.560 this is really going to probably end up in marriage. Okay, 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.040 So then say that, don't stand bored because even putting 0:03:58.040 --> 0:04:01.000 that energy out there, it's like people who are going 0:04:01.040 --> 0:04:03.040 to come and just occupy your time and not add 0:04:03.080 --> 0:04:03.960 value to your time. 0:04:04.400 --> 0:04:10.280 Okay, already an I want three boyfriends a roster. I 0:04:10.280 --> 0:04:13.120 want a roster. Three is good. 0:04:13.040 --> 0:04:15.760 Numbers, like, just to balance me out a little bit. 0:04:16.560 --> 0:04:19.839 Because I was celibate for two years, so I wasn't dating. 0:04:19.880 --> 0:04:25.000 I wasn't really doing anything for a while two years basically, And. 0:04:24.960 --> 0:04:27.360 What led to that chort or like I was in. 0:04:27.320 --> 0:04:32.440 A situationship and I felt like I kept finding myself 0:04:32.839 --> 0:04:35.800 in situations where I was using my body in a 0:04:35.800 --> 0:04:38.000 way that didn't feel good to me, and so I 0:04:38.040 --> 0:04:39.160 was like, you know what, let me just cut the 0:04:39.160 --> 0:04:41.400 shit out and take a little breather and see what. 0:04:41.480 --> 0:04:42.919 I've never really been that. 0:04:44.240 --> 0:04:48.840 Thoughty, I like that word. 0:04:48.920 --> 0:04:50.200 It has never really been my thing. 0:04:50.240 --> 0:04:52.400 And so that's what I realized about myself, is that 0:04:52.480 --> 0:04:53.760 I get emotionally attached. 0:04:55.279 --> 0:04:57.120 Sometimes I could be a savage, but that's kind of 0:04:57.160 --> 0:04:57.840 where I'm at now. 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:02.039 I want diverse, but with the same people. 0:05:02.080 --> 0:05:05.080 I don't want to be out here Thoughty. 0:05:05.240 --> 0:05:05.520 Yeah. 0:05:05.800 --> 0:05:08.800 Yeah, but you know, a little rotation. Yeah, And that's 0:05:08.839 --> 0:05:09.800 totally valid too. 0:05:09.839 --> 0:05:12.280 And I think the best step is, like for anyone, 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:15.039 recognizing where you are and what you're looking for and 0:05:15.080 --> 0:05:18.080 being clear about that. Something that so Tinder just did 0:05:18.080 --> 0:05:20.000 their year in swipe right and one of the things 0:05:20.040 --> 0:05:24.400 that they saw even in like dating bios we're calling 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:26.960 it loud looking but sort of looking for was the 0:05:27.040 --> 0:05:30.279 top ranked thing that was mentioned in profiles this year 0:05:30.360 --> 0:05:33.080 versus say last year, where people are being clear about 0:05:33.120 --> 0:05:35.279 what this is what I'm looking for, whether it's you know, 0:05:35.320 --> 0:05:37.039 I kind of want a roster, I'm looking for something 0:05:37.040 --> 0:05:39.080 long term, even if it's like I'm in a place 0:05:39.080 --> 0:05:41.840 that I'm not quite sure. They're just being communicative about 0:05:41.880 --> 0:05:45.720 that versus a year ago where situationships and ambiguity and 0:05:45.760 --> 0:05:47.440 being like I don't really know what I want was 0:05:47.480 --> 0:05:47.720 the thing. 0:05:48.279 --> 0:05:50.760 Being clear? Yeah, it's like the first step. 0:05:50.960 --> 0:05:54.760 Yeah, because sometimes people used to always say things like, oh, well, 0:05:54.880 --> 0:05:57.880 you know, it'll just find you, or if you're looking 0:05:57.880 --> 0:06:00.080 for it, it won't happen. People used to say, I 0:06:00.080 --> 0:06:03.280 feel like that's an old school type of thing, because 0:06:03.320 --> 0:06:06.680 now I always felt like dating, if you really know 0:06:06.760 --> 0:06:08.560 what you want and your intentional it is like looking 0:06:08.560 --> 0:06:08.840 for a. 0:06:08.839 --> 0:06:09.440 Job, that's what. 0:06:10.160 --> 0:06:12.239 Yeah, I tell you that. Yeah, it's like I gotta 0:06:12.360 --> 0:06:15.960 like really be clear these You gotta leave the house 0:06:16.080 --> 0:06:18.560 and look online. Dating is the same thing as like 0:06:18.600 --> 0:06:22.640 applying for jobs, and you might get some rejections. You 0:06:22.720 --> 0:06:24.920 might find some jobs, go on these interviews it doesn't 0:06:24.920 --> 0:06:27.280 work out, or you might go and get hired. 0:06:27.160 --> 0:06:31.040 Yeah literally, or you might do hi, you might hire somebody. 0:06:31.200 --> 0:06:32.200 Never been on a dating. 0:06:32.000 --> 0:06:34.240 It, really I think you should try. I think you 0:06:34.240 --> 0:06:34.880 would love it. 0:06:35.200 --> 0:06:38.960 I mean seeking arrangements, but they don't really count. That's 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:43.320 a dating app. It can be I don't find anybody 0:06:45.120 --> 0:06:45.640 at the time. 0:06:46.320 --> 0:06:48.760 What about being intentional about that like, I just want 0:06:48.800 --> 0:06:50.560 somebody with a lot of money to take care of me. 0:06:51.000 --> 0:06:54.880 I mean again, be intentional, know yourself, know thyself, be true, 0:06:54.960 --> 0:06:56.440 and be honest about it. 0:06:56.480 --> 0:06:58.400 And I think that's totally valid and fine. 0:06:58.760 --> 0:07:01.480 And then you can move to move in a direction 0:07:01.520 --> 0:07:05.159 because you looking for intinctionality right now, since that's different 0:07:05.240 --> 0:07:07.840 than Jeordie wanting a roster, you're gonna move a little 0:07:07.880 --> 0:07:11.640 bit differently and how you're evaluating people and dating people. 0:07:12.040 --> 0:07:14.840 So it's also why it's important to kind of like 0:07:14.920 --> 0:07:17.000 speak it out loud and really know, like, all right, 0:07:17.080 --> 0:07:18.920 this is where we are, and if it changes in 0:07:19.000 --> 0:07:21.880 terms of what you want, that's totally okay too. But 0:07:22.200 --> 0:07:25.760 fifty percent of new relationships they just we actually I 0:07:25.800 --> 0:07:29.440 was just speaking with a clinical researcher, clinical psychologist, and 0:07:29.760 --> 0:07:32.520 they found that fifty percent of relationships now begin online. 0:07:32.760 --> 0:07:36.120 Like that it is, and people who are really imbursed 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:39.400 out using online Like no one's still using a rotary phone, 0:07:39.400 --> 0:07:42.720 being like ah man, those cell phones, that technology, you'd 0:07:42.760 --> 0:07:46.120 look at them like what like where you what? Ha? 0:07:47.200 --> 0:07:49.560 So online dating is the same thing. 0:07:49.560 --> 0:07:51.560 Doesn't mean it has to only be that people are 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:55.520 still meeting in person, but opening yourself up to that 0:07:55.720 --> 0:07:58.720 also opens up a whole new world of possibilities. 0:07:58.760 --> 0:08:01.080 Right to meet your husband online. 0:08:01.400 --> 0:08:02.360 Very gay period. 0:08:02.640 --> 0:08:05.360 All the engagements came from online, So I'm just saying, well, 0:08:05.360 --> 0:08:08.800 there's three So what made you feel like? 0:08:08.920 --> 0:08:12.160 Okay? Like even in his profile, what made you say 0:08:12.200 --> 0:08:13.040 I'll go out with him? 0:08:13.240 --> 0:08:13.400 Ha? 0:08:13.920 --> 0:08:14.280 Okay? 0:08:14.920 --> 0:08:20.320 So so he and I met online, probably like in 0:08:20.320 --> 0:08:22.560 twenty seventeen, So I don't know what was the math 0:08:22.640 --> 0:08:27.720 like seven years ago, and I think it was what 0:08:27.800 --> 0:08:30.520 he wrote was kind of witty, like funny. He was 0:08:30.560 --> 0:08:32.880 cute in his photos, but guys also take weird photos 0:08:32.880 --> 0:08:36.440 online too, and he's a creative advertising so even now, 0:08:36.480 --> 0:08:39.360 so like once we reconnected an explant second, I like 0:08:39.440 --> 0:08:41.800 went through his profile just for fun and I was like, ew, 0:08:41.880 --> 0:08:43.760 I never would have swiped on this now, like your 0:08:43.800 --> 0:08:47.240 photos are awful. So but he had at least like 0:08:47.320 --> 0:08:49.520 two presentable ones that I was a good photo just 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:52.040 for people. Listen to your face a guy, especially for 0:08:52.240 --> 0:08:55.320 men or women out at a social function is good. 0:08:55.679 --> 0:08:56.080 All of them. 0:08:56.120 --> 0:08:57.960 Can't be with your friends, but at least one maybe 0:08:58.000 --> 0:08:59.440 where you're dressed, you're at a wedding, you were at 0:08:59.440 --> 0:09:01.840 a friend's didn't birthday dinner or something like that with 0:09:01.920 --> 0:09:05.040 good lighting, that's a good one. A solo shot outdoors, 0:09:05.080 --> 0:09:07.680 just because outdoor lighting is the best natural lighting, and 0:09:07.679 --> 0:09:10.280 studies show that that tends to do really well, like 0:09:10.280 --> 0:09:13.080 with a lot of blue background. If you have pets, 0:09:13.200 --> 0:09:15.520 or like a particular hobby or activity, you like one 0:09:15.520 --> 0:09:17.719 photo that shows you doing that. You don't have to 0:09:17.800 --> 0:09:20.040 be dulled up in it, but it just shows because 0:09:20.040 --> 0:09:21.880 what you're doing is you're filling in the blanks with 0:09:21.920 --> 0:09:24.240 your photos, right, Like, there's only so much you can 0:09:24.280 --> 0:09:27.040 write on your profile. So instead of being like I 0:09:27.160 --> 0:09:29.480 like to try things and I like animals, show a 0:09:29.480 --> 0:09:32.719 picture of you with animals, or show a picture of you, 0:09:32.720 --> 0:09:35.640 you know, doing painting or hiking or doing whatever the 0:09:35.679 --> 0:09:38.600 thing is, and make sure you're like at least laughing 0:09:38.600 --> 0:09:40.960 in one or something like just that you don't take 0:09:40.960 --> 0:09:42.120 yourself so sick of me. 0:09:42.720 --> 0:09:44.400 I want you to do an audit of my I 0:09:44.400 --> 0:09:48.680 would eating okay, And you say it doesn't really say anything. 0:09:48.880 --> 0:09:50.360 I'm really bad at bio. 0:09:50.520 --> 0:09:52.559 Wait, it isn't anything at all. Hold on, let me 0:09:52.600 --> 0:09:54.959 see she pulls that up. Let me see what's going. 0:09:55.040 --> 0:09:57.480 Yeah, So whilst he's looking at that. What's some advice 0:09:57.480 --> 0:09:58.880 you would give for somebody's bio. 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:00.559 There's no ex uses. Now. 0:10:00.559 --> 0:10:03.440 First of all, there should be one chat GPT is 0:10:03.480 --> 0:10:07.000 free claude AI, which I prefer. It's more conversational. You 0:10:07.040 --> 0:10:09.040 can also use for free. You can put in some 0:10:09.080 --> 0:10:12.080 bullet points about yourself and say, I and my name 0:10:12.160 --> 0:10:15.000 is blah blah blah. I am thirty six, I live here, 0:10:15.120 --> 0:10:16.760 I am trying to track this, this and this. 0:10:17.160 --> 0:10:22.480 I like, uh, you know dogs, I work in radio. 0:10:22.960 --> 0:10:25.040 I da da da. My friends describe me of this. 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:30.600 Write me a compelling, short, witty bio, give me some options, 0:10:31.000 --> 0:10:32.760 and then it'll keep doing. You can even pull some 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:34.720 of your favorite lines from each of the options it 0:10:34.760 --> 0:10:36.400 gives you and create to customize. 0:10:36.480 --> 0:10:37.480 But you don't have to do any of. 0:10:37.480 --> 0:10:41.640 The thinking, Okay, you're doing it's really that. 0:10:42.679 --> 0:10:44.080 Don't worry. I'm seeing I'm seeing. 0:10:43.840 --> 0:10:47.079 It all by doing it. It's so cute and dope. 0:10:47.440 --> 0:10:50.480 I think any guy would be so excited to end 0:10:50.559 --> 0:10:52.240 up on a date with Jordan. 0:10:52.720 --> 0:10:55.480 You would think so. 0:10:55.480 --> 0:10:57.720 So it says my job obviously, because you have to 0:10:57.720 --> 0:10:59.840 put that in there, and then it just says about 0:10:59.840 --> 0:11:03.000 you for your job. It says DJ, nonprofit co founder, 0:11:04.920 --> 0:11:10.080 a music loving potato enthusiast, and then it says I'm 0:11:10.080 --> 0:11:13.280 a straight woman interested in women and men, though I'd love. 0:11:13.160 --> 0:11:16.880 To connect with anyone because it has both men and women. 0:11:18.640 --> 0:11:22.120 Did you guys feel confused by what she? I feel 0:11:22.160 --> 0:11:22.440 like it was. 0:11:22.600 --> 0:11:24.560 Yeah, I didn't know she wanted to date a potato. 0:11:26.920 --> 0:11:28.720 I mean that it was the love of my life. 0:11:28.840 --> 0:11:32.080 So I didn't based. I didn't. 0:11:32.080 --> 0:11:33.920 It didn't match to me what you what you like, 0:11:33.960 --> 0:11:35.480 who you are yea, who you are, and what you 0:11:35.480 --> 0:11:36.440 say and then what you're looking for? 0:11:36.600 --> 0:11:39.160 To me, it didn't okay, how how would I like? 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:41.720 What should I shift? I actually liked your first line 0:11:41.720 --> 0:11:42.000 a lot. 0:11:42.040 --> 0:11:43.560 I thought it was funny. And even if it does, 0:11:43.600 --> 0:11:47.000 that part doesn't make sense. It stops you in your potato. 0:11:49.880 --> 0:11:58.120 And those are all great first line, like for people 0:11:58.120 --> 0:11:59.240 thinking what would I say to that? 0:11:59.240 --> 0:12:00.640 That's those are all first lines. 0:12:00.920 --> 0:12:04.160 It was the rest that got confusing, of like, you 0:12:04.240 --> 0:12:07.120 literally contradict yourself because you go out a straight woman 0:12:08.160 --> 0:12:11.880 but looking to meet anyone and so and in what 0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:14.560 content and what capacity? Like, all of that starts to 0:12:14.559 --> 0:12:18.960 get confusing. So I focus on one other thing about 0:12:18.960 --> 0:12:21.760 you that is that really does show or reflect kind 0:12:21.760 --> 0:12:22.800 of you or your personality. 0:12:22.880 --> 0:12:24.600 So leave the potato line. I think it's funny. 0:12:24.800 --> 0:12:27.920 But then just something about like, you know, passionate Like 0:12:27.920 --> 0:12:30.880 you mentioned you have a nonprofit, so like passionate about 0:12:31.160 --> 0:12:35.480 you know, whatever the causes or enjoy doing X. And 0:12:35.559 --> 0:12:39.360 then write something that gets you excited in a potential 0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:42.719 like partner or rostermate. So be like bonus points if 0:12:42.760 --> 0:12:47.560 you know how to blank, or if you're good at this, or. 0:12:48.720 --> 0:12:50.920 You know, you might catch my eye if you do that. 0:12:51.000 --> 0:12:53.760 So you're kind of like teased dangling a little bit 0:12:54.120 --> 0:12:55.200 so that they can come for it. 0:12:55.240 --> 0:12:56.720 Okay, got it perfect? 0:12:56.800 --> 0:12:59.160 We like that not yeah, because and I think there's 0:12:59.160 --> 0:13:02.160 so many things that you know, you're very close to 0:13:02.200 --> 0:13:05.640 your father. I think that's you know, that's always a bonus. 0:13:05.679 --> 0:13:08.160 I think it matters a lot how people interact with 0:13:08.200 --> 0:13:11.320 like family and you know, so I always look at 0:13:11.320 --> 0:13:13.439 that as a plus if somebody I love when people 0:13:13.480 --> 0:13:16.440 have like great relationships with you know, I always think 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:17.760 it's a red flag if they don't. 0:13:18.480 --> 0:13:18.680 Right. 0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:21.040 We were talking about this today, which is funny on 0:13:21.040 --> 0:13:22.760 the Today Show about if that's a flag or not. 0:13:24.160 --> 0:13:26.480 I agree it's always better when they're close with their family. 0:13:26.520 --> 0:13:29.000 But I do think you have to make space for 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:31.520 the fact that not everyone grew up with a supporting, 0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:35.120 a supportive or loving you know, and so and as 0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:38.600 we move into a place of personal growth and we 0:13:38.640 --> 0:13:41.280 get older, and I feel like when we were younger 0:13:41.280 --> 0:13:43.920 in our parents' generations, there's a little bit of toxicity 0:13:43.920 --> 0:13:45.720 where it's like you stick beside. 0:13:45.400 --> 0:13:47.280 Them no matter what happened. 0:13:47.360 --> 0:13:49.520 And now we've come to a place that like, I 0:13:49.559 --> 0:13:51.240 can love you, but I may need to do so 0:13:51.360 --> 0:13:54.240 from a distance if you weren't healthy for me. So 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:59.240 be careful and using a broad brush to like for 0:13:59.320 --> 0:14:02.719 anyone like fine, doubt the why behind maybe why they 0:14:02.720 --> 0:14:07.240 have the dynamic with their family, because yeah, because my. 0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:10.000 Mom used to be like, the first time I heard 0:14:10.000 --> 0:14:11.760 your father yeo was the day we got married. And 0:14:11.800 --> 0:14:14.880 then she was like, we would the whole family when 0:14:14.920 --> 0:14:16.600 we would come there, they would all be like, oh, man, 0:14:16.640 --> 0:14:19.480 here he comes. So it always was kind of something 0:14:19.480 --> 0:14:22.560 that's stuck in my head, you know, when she did 0:14:22.600 --> 0:14:30.200 say that, sorry, Dad, I know he listens. Now I 0:14:30.240 --> 0:14:34.440 want to ask you some other questions. Okay, so how 0:14:34.480 --> 0:14:38.520 do you know when it's time to give someone a chance, 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:40.520 even though they may have had a rocky pass, Like 0:14:40.520 --> 0:14:43.360 we all know the person who Maybe people are like, oh, 0:14:43.400 --> 0:14:45.280 he was a cheater, He's always going to be a cheater. 0:14:45.600 --> 0:14:47.760 Maybe you start dating somebody and somebody sends you a 0:14:47.800 --> 0:14:49.640 message like, girl, he used to date my friend and 0:14:49.680 --> 0:14:52.840 he was, you know, awful. Right, So what do you 0:14:52.880 --> 0:14:54.960 do in that case, because you do want to make 0:14:55.000 --> 0:14:56.440 sure you have your guard up a little. But at 0:14:56.440 --> 0:15:00.320 the same time, you can't take somebody else's experience, you know, 0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:03.760 and run with that. But then maybe you're ignoring something 0:15:03.800 --> 0:15:06.080 that could really be like a we try to tell 0:15:06.120 --> 0:15:07.760 you because we see it happen all the time. 0:15:08.760 --> 0:15:09.600 That's a really good question. 0:15:10.880 --> 0:15:13.640 One thing I'd say is probably look at look at 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:16.080 the signs outside of you. Right, So if they're saying 0:15:16.080 --> 0:15:18.520 they're changed person, how are they moving through the world, 0:15:18.600 --> 0:15:21.320 just in how they treat women? For example, in general, 0:15:21.480 --> 0:15:24.920 do they seem like they're a respectful person consistently, not 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:27.320 only to the woman they're trying to woo in that moment, 0:15:27.480 --> 0:15:30.320 but like in general, that's a good sign. Ask him 0:15:30.320 --> 0:15:32.600 about ask him about his past relationships, be like, what 0:15:32.640 --> 0:15:35.840 did you learn from that relationship because that helps. You're 0:15:35.840 --> 0:15:37.960 now giving him all the tools to see where he 0:15:38.320 --> 0:15:41.280 paces places the blame what he says about it. You know, 0:15:41.280 --> 0:15:42.960 it's not like, well why didn't you work out with her? 0:15:43.000 --> 0:15:44.800 Why'd you cheat on her? It's just what did you learn? 0:15:45.120 --> 0:15:46.920 And if he's like, well, she did this, and she 0:15:47.040 --> 0:15:50.720 did that, and she did this, and there's nobility accountability, 0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:54.200 like but if he's like, you know what, back then, 0:15:54.280 --> 0:15:57.680 I wasn't really sure because for probably most of us here, 0:15:58.160 --> 0:16:02.400 there's someone in our past who be like, they're terrible, 0:16:02.440 --> 0:16:03.800 you know what I mean, like they broke my heart, 0:16:03.960 --> 0:16:06.200 they did this, or they whatever, And we had our 0:16:06.240 --> 0:16:10.320 reasons for doing what we did, so it doesn't necessarily 0:16:10.360 --> 0:16:11.280 make us bad. 0:16:11.320 --> 0:16:13.400 It doesn't necessarily make this other person bad. 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:17.040 But if they if they keep, if the way that 0:16:17.080 --> 0:16:19.920 they speak and the way that they move outside of 0:16:19.920 --> 0:16:22.440 how they are directly towards you is still consistent with 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:25.560 all the negativity you're hearing, then they probably haven't outgrown that, 0:16:25.640 --> 0:16:29.400 and you probably you know, should look but not touched now. 0:16:29.440 --> 0:16:32.120 This year is wipe list in particular. Jordan and I 0:16:32.160 --> 0:16:35.000 have a really big issue, yes with something on this list. 0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:38.680 All right, So the years wipe is basically tender talking 0:16:38.680 --> 0:16:41.840 about the dating transfer twenty twenty four, what's ahead for 0:16:41.880 --> 0:16:45.240 twenty twenty five? Now one part of this seed all 0:16:45.280 --> 0:16:48.280 over your face and said the most attractive users star 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:52.560 signs in twenty twenty four to men, and for some 0:16:52.640 --> 0:16:56.040 reason for men and women, Capricorn was last on the list. 0:16:56.080 --> 0:16:57.760 We were the bottom of every zodiocracy. 0:16:57.840 --> 0:16:59.600 Everything else was kind of on point. But then we 0:16:59.640 --> 0:17:01.400 saw that and it made us question. 0:17:01.240 --> 0:17:03.120 This wholes. 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:14.600 It was given before us. Know you were and enough 0:17:14.720 --> 0:17:20.440 gem and I was most attractive two men. We're crazy. 0:17:19.680 --> 0:17:26.640 I like that apparently, But how important is and we're 0:17:26.680 --> 0:17:29.760 not placing no importance on this particular list, but how 0:17:29.800 --> 0:17:34.080 important do you think astrology is? And have you been 0:17:34.240 --> 0:17:38.040 a person Devin who has been like, okay, well, oh no, 0:17:38.080 --> 0:17:39.080 I don't date that sign. 0:17:39.640 --> 0:17:42.240 I've never intentionally said I don't date a sign, but 0:17:42.440 --> 0:17:44.520 I will say in all my dating history, when I 0:17:44.560 --> 0:17:46.040 started to look at it, there were a lot of 0:17:46.440 --> 0:17:49.760 clusters of similar sign like a lot of people born 0:17:50.040 --> 0:17:52.399 within the same like two or three weeks here and 0:17:52.480 --> 0:17:56.920 the same, never intentionally, so there's got to be something 0:17:56.960 --> 0:17:59.960 around what you're like drawn to. Now you know those persons. 0:18:00.080 --> 0:18:02.080 People worked out and I ended up marrying a Gemini. 0:18:02.320 --> 0:18:05.159 And I had been warned about what a Gemini means. 0:18:05.960 --> 0:18:11.320 It's going on wars. And you know, while I think 0:18:11.400 --> 0:18:15.239 that he has, like there's multiple sides to him just 0:18:15.240 --> 0:18:18.679 in terms of like his interests, like he can you know, uh, 0:18:19.000 --> 0:18:20.239 there's a lot that he can do. You can kind 0:18:20.240 --> 0:18:22.399 of take him anywhere. He's an adaptable person. 0:18:22.920 --> 0:18:26.200 He's not he's you know, he's pretty straight. I'm totally 0:18:26.200 --> 0:18:30.400 crazier than he is. And that's how people. 0:18:31.880 --> 0:18:34.000 But I never dated a Gemini before him and that 0:18:34.200 --> 0:18:36.240 and he was like, he's my person through and through. 0:18:36.400 --> 0:18:39.240 That seems to be the cluster of what I've dated 0:18:39.840 --> 0:18:44.080 as a Gemini, like most of my significant relationships have been. 0:18:44.119 --> 0:18:46.800 So maybe move away from the like experiment with out 0:18:46.800 --> 0:18:47.359 of the cluster. 0:18:47.520 --> 0:18:50.920 Get yourself a Scorpio or something wild, maybe a virgo. 0:18:51.600 --> 0:18:55.000 I've had that I really liked. 0:18:56.440 --> 0:18:57.800