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Speaker 1: Beautiful, beautiful, beautily.

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Speaker 2: I fear little efficient, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautifully efficient work.

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Speaker 3: Scotty, are you ready to start?

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Speaker 4: I am in the best mood today, and I don't

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Speaker 4: know why I'm so ready for this episode.

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Speaker 3: Oh okay, I'm in a.

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Speaker 1: Pretty pretty damn good food.

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Speaker 2: Myself, especially because of this headline. Thousands in China are

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Speaker 2: using a special remote to repel quote dancing grannies.

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Speaker 4: Okay, all right, you know that's the cool thing about China.

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Speaker 4: I have no idea what's going on there at any

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Speaker 4: moment at all, So let's get into it.

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Speaker 3: Bananas.

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Speaker 5: Still, world understand my tzillion pieces?

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Speaker 3: Would you?

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Speaker 1: Guys, gals and non binary pals. Welcome to Bananas.

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Speaker 4: I'm Kurp Browniler, I'm banana boy number two Scott Alandis.

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Speaker 4: Thank you for listening to the silliest little podcast there

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Speaker 4: ever was.

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Speaker 3: I think I'm in a great.

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Speaker 4: Mood because it rained briefly in Los Angeles. I woke

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Speaker 4: up to the rain rain in LA. People hate when

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Speaker 4: you tweet about rain in LA. But you, guys, you

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Speaker 4: gotta understand. It's a desert here. It never rains, and

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Speaker 4: it's like facing your slow death all the time. Rain

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Speaker 4: in la is like going to a party and you

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Speaker 4: walk in in the cutest person there looks at you

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Speaker 4: and you're like, oh, this is gonna be something. And

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Speaker 4: then they walk out with someone more attractive than you

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Speaker 4: and you never see him again. You were like, this

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Speaker 4: was almost a great thing, and ten minutes later it's over.

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Speaker 2: I went I was so excited that it was like

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Speaker 2: a little cloudy this morning. Yeah, and so I I

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Speaker 2: dropped the kids off. I am solo dadding for two

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Speaker 2: straight weeks because Laura. This guy is in uh In

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Speaker 2: Hawaii shooting ncis Hawaii.

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Speaker 1: She's got a recurring role on it.

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Speaker 3: She's awesome.

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Speaker 4: My parents told me, they're like, she's quirky and funny

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Speaker 4: and great, and she's like.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, she is.

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Speaker 2: She really is. She's quirky and funny and great and

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Speaker 2: sexy too.

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Speaker 1: It's weird.

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Speaker 2: She's like she's found a way to be like quirky

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Speaker 2: and sexy and it's very exciting. She's like she's like

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Speaker 2: a swat She's like a Swat team detective or something. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and she's the love interest of like the nerd computer

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Speaker 2: guy and Chris Chris also Texapy. It's like he's like

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Speaker 2: Lauren was great. It's almost like she's really used to

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Speaker 2: being in love with a fucking weirdo.

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Speaker 4: Well yes, but that's huge for her. If you've if

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Speaker 4: you don't know Lauren Cook, go back and listen to her.

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Speaker 4: We have a Bananas after Dark with her. It's arguably

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Speaker 4: our best episode.

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Speaker 3: Time.

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Speaker 2: We got to do that again. So I was excited.

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Speaker 2: I really hard weekend. Gus was like sick and it

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Speaker 2: was just like non stop marathon with just two kids

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Speaker 2: and just working it. So then I dropped them off

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Speaker 2: and I had my I got my my gear with me,

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Speaker 2: my backpack, hiking boots, and I drove into the Angelus

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Speaker 2: National Forest and it was like I was like up

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Speaker 2: in the clouds and I went started for this big

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Speaker 2: hike I planned on doing like a two hour long

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Speaker 2: hike and get up to like the top of the

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Speaker 2: first peak, and then it just starts pouring, not just

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Speaker 2: like it had been, just like a little light missed,

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Speaker 2: which is like the best hiking weather ever.

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Speaker 4: It's a wonderful feel a light missed.

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Speaker 2: And then it was just a like a day luge.

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Speaker 2: And I did not bring like cause you know, I

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Speaker 2: could have put a waterproof something in my bag and

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Speaker 2: I did it sure, and so I was just immediately

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Speaker 2: soaked to the bone and then had like a half

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Speaker 2: hour walk down the mountain.

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Speaker 1: But guess what, loved every second of it.

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Speaker 3: We're in great moods today. We're in great moods. We're

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Speaker 3: glad you here, guys.

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Speaker 4: Well, will you have a show Dynasty Typewriter in Los

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Speaker 4: Angeles on the yeah, Thursday, so two days from when

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Speaker 4: this is coming out. You can watch the live stream

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Speaker 4: even if you live in like Walla Walla, Washington or

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Speaker 4: Kenny Bunkport, Maine. You can watch us laugh and laugh

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Speaker 4: and laugh do bananas live. We're going to record the podcast.

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Speaker 4: We have a secret guest.

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Speaker 2: Secret guest for the live show in Los Angeles that

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Speaker 2: you should be streaming.

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Speaker 1: You should streaming.

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Speaker 2: We had our fantastic I'm assuming it all it works out.

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Speaker 2: We had our fantastic guest in Connecticut just last Saturday,

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Speaker 2: which is the future for us, but the past for

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Speaker 2: us when you're listening, that's fairly confusing.

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Speaker 3: M hmm.

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Speaker 2: Daniel Henderson from I saw what you did, and she

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Speaker 2: was fantastic. I'm guessing she was fantastic.

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Speaker 3: She crushed it.

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Speaker 4: She's funnier than us. We love her down and uh

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Speaker 4: that's October twenty eighth, Dynasty Typewriter in La. Come on

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Speaker 4: out live stream and for anybody that's coming to these

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Speaker 4: shows on our little mini tour, we're going to have

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Speaker 4: a Banana's Confession box at the front of the stage

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Speaker 4: before the show. We're gonna have pieces of paper and

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Speaker 4: pens for you to write on. But if you want

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Speaker 4: to preload a confession, don't send it to the Instagram.

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Speaker 4: We will reject it if you send it early. This

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Speaker 4: is We're going to pull your real confessions out of

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Speaker 4: the box, read them on stage.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna go over. We're not going to make them anonymous.

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Speaker 4: We don't because if they're not anonymous, you won't go

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Speaker 4: Bananas enough. So Banana's Confessions at our live show and

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Speaker 4: thanks everybody for coming out and we'll see y'all soon.

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Speaker 3: Any farts, any farts.

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Speaker 1: You want to hear about this special remote.

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Speaker 4: More than anything in my life this I didn't understand

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Speaker 4: it when you said it, so I love reading more

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Speaker 4: about it.

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Speaker 2: Agreed, Agreed, I will read it again. Here is the title.

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Speaker 2: Thousands in China are you thousands?

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Speaker 3: First off?

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Speaker 2: Thousands in China are using a special remote to repel

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Speaker 2: quote dancing grannies. All right, okay, this was sent in

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Speaker 2: by Sarah Gossit. This is onvice written by Viola Jou.

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Speaker 2: This is there's a there's an image. There's a picture

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Speaker 2: of the remote and a picture of the dancing grannies.

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Speaker 3: Holy smoke, here he goes.

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Speaker 2: Residents who are fed up with the noise from China's

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Speaker 2: ubiquitous dancing grannies are resorting to a special device that

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Speaker 2: could mess with the speakers that blast out loud music.

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Speaker 2: They use an infrared remote control dubbed anti square Dancing

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Speaker 2: magical device.

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Speaker 3: All right, I love the name right off.

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Speaker 2: To silence the noisy dancing troops that have taken over

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Speaker 2: public squares, parks, and housing estates across China. So called

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Speaker 2: square dancing has in the past decades become a huge

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Speaker 2: in the past decades become a hugely popular pastime for

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Speaker 2: China's growing senior population, giving the retirees, mostly women, a

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Speaker 2: chance to exercise and make friends at the same time.

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Speaker 2: Sounds incredibly pleasant, yes, But with scarce public spaces in

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Speaker 2: urban China, the loud music has become a major nuisance

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Speaker 2: for other residents and led to intense disputes. In twenty thirteen,

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Speaker 2: someone in the central city of Wuhan dumped feces on

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Speaker 2: a group of dancing women.

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Speaker 4: Come on, that's met. No, there were grannies. We're against it.

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Speaker 2: We're four a lot of things here, but we're definitely

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Speaker 2: against dumping feces on No grandmothers or anyone.

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Speaker 4: Nobody dumped feces on anyone unless it's your kink and

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Speaker 4: you're probably German than go for it, ha.

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Speaker 3: Frankfurt.

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Speaker 4: You can do it, not in China, and not to

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Speaker 4: the grannies, not today anyone.

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Speaker 2: And in twenty sixteen, a man in the southern city

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Speaker 2: of Gula, angered by the noise, shot at a dancing

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Speaker 2: group's loudspeaker with an airgun. It with an air gun

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Speaker 2: and accidentally hit a woman on her Still, merchants of

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Speaker 2: the New Square Dancing Repeller are advertising an easier way

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Speaker 2: to stop the noise. The device, priced at fifteen dollars

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Speaker 2: to forty dollars each on shopping site. Towbow resembles a

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Speaker 2: universal remote control and is able to shut down most

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Speaker 2: speakers by you have read signals. According to the vendors,

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Speaker 2: to stop the music, users are instructed to stand close

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Speaker 2: to the loudspeaker they want to target, point the device

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Speaker 2: up towards its control panel, and hold on onto a

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Speaker 2: button for about fifteen seconds. Han Lee, a nineteen year

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Speaker 2: old businessman in the central province of Henan, told Vice

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Speaker 2: World News he had successfully repelled most dancing troops in

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Speaker 2: his neighborhood with the device. Hans said he was long

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Speaker 2: bothered by the music broadcast by square dancing groups on

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Speaker 2: the early morning and at night, but reports to local

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Speaker 2: police did not help. In March, he purchased the device

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Speaker 2: and started going around shutting off loudspeakers after nine pm.

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Speaker 1: That's reasonable, That sounds reasonable.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's okay.

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Speaker 2: You gotta if someone set up a loud speaker in

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Speaker 2: front of my house and blasted it until nine pm,

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Speaker 2: I have children that go to bed at seven, so

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Speaker 2: I would lose my.

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Speaker 3: Mind, all right, yep.

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Speaker 2: On one night, Han recalled, he stopped thirty six. This

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Speaker 2: is crazy. On one night, Han recalled, he stopped thirty

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Speaker 2: six square dancing troops.

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Speaker 1: They're really everywhere, okay, okay.

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Speaker 2: In videos provided by him, square dancers looked confused as

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Speaker 2: their music abruptly stopped and went to check on the speakers.

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Speaker 2: Hans said, no one realized he was the mastermind behind

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Speaker 2: the breakdowns.

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Speaker 3: He says, I was upholding justice.

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Speaker 4: Well, come on, Han, yeah, relax, relax hand you just

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Speaker 4: hate dancer.

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Speaker 2: Exactly, you don't really Grandma is to have fun. This

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Speaker 2: is not holding justice, all right, You're not that right.

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Speaker 2: And then this is basically so then he start he

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Speaker 2: made he handmade it. I won't read the rest of it.

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Speaker 2: He handmade it. And now he sells it. Now he

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Speaker 2: is a businessman and he's nineteen. He's nineteen.

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Speaker 3: You gonna do well, He's gonna make a lot of money.

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Speaker 1: Is I So?

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Speaker 2: First off, what an amazing what an amazing trend that

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Speaker 2: we have no awareness of, no idea. I remember my

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Speaker 2: brother got me a very similar device for turning off televisions.

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Speaker 3: Incredible.

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Speaker 1: He bought it.

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Speaker 2: For me and give it to me. And because I

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Speaker 2: hate this is when I was like twenty three, and you.

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Speaker 3: Had a lot of attitude. Back then, I was stronger takes.

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Speaker 1: Back then, I had very strong takes.

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Speaker 2: I was a bit of a brat and one thing

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Speaker 2: that I hated was TV's on at bars.

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Speaker 3: Yes, you did.

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Speaker 4: When I first met you, when you were my improv teacher,

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Speaker 4: you were like, let's not go to that bar. They

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Speaker 4: have TVs. You would like it furious. This is a

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Speaker 4: true Kurt moment. Furious.

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Speaker 2: And I'm not talking about if there's like a big

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Speaker 2: game on and everybody's there. I mean, now now, back then,

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Speaker 2: probably I still just like it even if there's a

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Speaker 2: big game on.

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Speaker 3: But I'm not.

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Speaker 2: Talking about when there's a big game everyone's gathered communally

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Speaker 2: to watch it. I'm just talking about there's just eight

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Speaker 2: TVs and they're just on. I agree with you, they're

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Speaker 2: just on. No one's watching them. They're muted and on

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Speaker 2: and like playing just some.

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Speaker 4: Bullshit because your eyes can't stop going to it. We

225
00:11:23,600 --> 00:11:26,760
Speaker 4: are our monkey brains go to I'm looking at the

226
00:11:26,800 --> 00:11:29,080
Speaker 4: glowing box no matter what. So you're looking over each

227
00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:31,000
Speaker 4: other's shoulders annoyingly the entire time, the.

228
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Speaker 3: Whole time, and its just like, yeah, I'm with you.

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Speaker 2: It interrupts, like, you know, a communal bonding experience, which

230
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:39,640
Speaker 2: is what the tevern.

231
00:11:39,320 --> 00:11:40,520
Speaker 1: Is supposed to be.

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00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:45,720
Speaker 2: I would go into these fucking bars and then just

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Speaker 2: sit there with my little remote. It was like the

234
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,240
Speaker 2: size of it, it was a key chain, and just sit

235
00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:52,439
Speaker 2: there and then I just hit a button, and basically

236
00:11:52,440 --> 00:11:54,920
Speaker 2: what it did was it went through all of the channels,

237
00:11:55,280 --> 00:11:58,280
Speaker 2: the radio channels that they could possibly be and send

238
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Speaker 2: the off signal. So about you know, fifteen seconds for

239
00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,320
Speaker 2: it to like shuffle through whatever the million channels there are,

240
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:07,880
Speaker 2: and we'll go and you could just watch them go.

241
00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:11,160
Speaker 1: Bank bank bank bank, bank, bank, bink and they would

242
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,720
Speaker 1: all shut off. And then of course it's just like

243
00:12:13,960 --> 00:12:16,640
Speaker 1: a fucking bartender who's you know, fucking has to do

244
00:12:16,679 --> 00:12:18,920
Speaker 1: more work exactly, he just has to do more work,

245
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:19,120
Speaker 1: you know.

246
00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:20,560
Speaker 3: But at the time, I thought.

247
00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:25,400
Speaker 1: It was so cool as a piece of I think

248
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:25,840
Speaker 1: it's cool.

249
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,080
Speaker 4: I mean, there were always kids in the in the

250
00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,959
Speaker 4: eighties and nineties that had those Casio watches that could

251
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:33,000
Speaker 4: control the TV. So when the teacher would push in

252
00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,240
Speaker 4: the TV with the VHS, they could like fast forward

253
00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:37,160
Speaker 4: and pause it. That was like a oh yeah, there

254
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:39,880
Speaker 4: was a watch maybe by Cassio that had a remote

255
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,959
Speaker 4: control built in. And it was always like the kid

256
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,240
Speaker 4: that was good at math and bad at everything else,

257
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:48,240
Speaker 4: and he they could or here she it's usually a

258
00:12:48,280 --> 00:12:52,280
Speaker 4: nerdy dude would like turn the TV on and off

259
00:12:52,320 --> 00:12:57,120
Speaker 4: pause it dress drive those those overpaid substitute teachers make

260
00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:57,760
Speaker 4: their lives.

261
00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:00,880
Speaker 2: Hell, oh my god, I had no idea that that is,

262
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,199
Speaker 2: like I can get them I still for sale.

263
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:06,600
Speaker 4: Really, Yeah, what do you think in fifty years, yeah,

264
00:13:06,679 --> 00:13:08,640
Speaker 4: will be the thing that we look at right now

265
00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:11,920
Speaker 4: that seems absolutely insane that it exists right now.

266
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Speaker 3: Hmmm. Oh, that's a good question.

267
00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:21,400
Speaker 4: There's a lot of things because I mean, honestly, it's

268
00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:24,280
Speaker 4: most the way things are speeding up. Fifty years from now,

269
00:13:24,480 --> 00:13:27,120
Speaker 4: almost everything we're doing now is going to seem insane.

270
00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:29,240
Speaker 3: Yeah.

271
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Speaker 2: I feel like the idea of like, uh that your phone,

272
00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:36,640
Speaker 2: like that not everything is smart, that you literally just

273
00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:38,440
Speaker 2: have one thing and then you just keep going and

274
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:42,440
Speaker 2: plugging it into other things, plugging like you take your

275
00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:44,360
Speaker 2: phone and you plug it into your car so that

276
00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:47,160
Speaker 2: your car has the things that your phone had. Then

277
00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,440
Speaker 2: you bring your phone home and you plug it in

278
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:52,040
Speaker 2: so that you can play music or you you know,

279
00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,480
Speaker 2: it's like this constant like plugging in stuff. I think

280
00:13:54,480 --> 00:13:56,839
Speaker 2: it's going to kind of probably seem crazy that or

281
00:13:57,040 --> 00:13:59,760
Speaker 2: we're gonna find out that microwaves are can cause all

282
00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:03,520
Speaker 2: the answer and we're probably like you had a cancer.

283
00:14:03,200 --> 00:14:06,959
Speaker 3: Box in your every place at a cancer box. Yeah,

284
00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:09,000
Speaker 3: I made popcorn with it all the time.

285
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:12,040
Speaker 2: I would stare it's at head level, and I would

286
00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:14,760
Speaker 2: stare and watch it as it cooks.

287
00:14:15,040 --> 00:14:17,559
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't like my spaghetti all the way warm.

288
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:19,080
Speaker 4: I like it a little cold in the middle. And

289
00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:20,920
Speaker 4: then I stand and eat it and burn my mouth

290
00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:22,720
Speaker 4: and look like a sad man. I like it, but

291
00:14:22,880 --> 00:14:27,800
Speaker 4: one part is a molten scol hop and the other

292
00:14:27,840 --> 00:14:29,760
Speaker 4: part is actually still frozen.

293
00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:31,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's what I like.

294
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:33,160
Speaker 4: And then I would stare at it and eat right

295
00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:35,440
Speaker 4: in front of the open door, using the light from

296
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:38,320
Speaker 4: the box to illuminate my binge eating.

297
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:41,560
Speaker 3: What do you think it is, Jiffy Loube?

298
00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:45,600
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I think oil changes are going in fifty years.

299
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:47,840
Speaker 4: Because you have an electric car, it doesn't get an

300
00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:48,840
Speaker 4: oil change right now.

301
00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:49,800
Speaker 3: The only thing you have.

302
00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:52,520
Speaker 4: To do is change the cabin filter. That's the only

303
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:55,800
Speaker 4: thing exactly. So in fifty years they're gonna be like, so,

304
00:14:56,040 --> 00:14:58,880
Speaker 4: wait a second. There was a place and you had

305
00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:02,720
Speaker 4: to lube your called Jiffy loub and they're like, and

306
00:15:02,760 --> 00:15:05,000
Speaker 4: you drove in and then they unscrewed a thing and

307
00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:07,720
Speaker 4: just liquid poured out, and you poured more liquid in.

308
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:09,400
Speaker 3: Oh what was that liquid?

309
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:12,760
Speaker 4: Made out of dead dinosaurs from millions of years ago.

310
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,560
Speaker 4: It's going just every time I passed the Jiffy loube now.

311
00:15:16,680 --> 00:15:18,760
Speaker 4: And because all the car companies are like, we're going electric,

312
00:15:18,760 --> 00:15:21,400
Speaker 4: We're going electric, like even four f one fifties are

313
00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:24,040
Speaker 4: going electric, and it's like we're going to look back

314
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:29,000
Speaker 4: at this time and be like, you greasy, what were

315
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:29,600
Speaker 4: you doing?

316
00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:33,560
Speaker 2: And also Jiffy loub is such a like just right

317
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:38,080
Speaker 2: on the borderline of being like a pornographic word. I

318
00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:42,000
Speaker 2: absolutely I remember I when I was I'm thinking I

319
00:15:42,040 --> 00:15:45,160
Speaker 2: was five, Oh, I was define five, okay, And I

320
00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:49,320
Speaker 2: had a babysitter that I love because she was like

321
00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:53,240
Speaker 2: she I mean, I can't imagine she was more than twelve,

322
00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:57,040
Speaker 2: but she would like let me stay up late, she

323
00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,280
Speaker 2: would let me eat whatever I wanted, like and then

324
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:02,840
Speaker 2: also I would just ask her to tell me, like

325
00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:05,360
Speaker 2: all the bad words that she knew, and then she

326
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:09,040
Speaker 2: would just list them for me like it was amazing,

327
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:13,240
Speaker 2: Like she just didn't give a ship and uh and so.

328
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:14,920
Speaker 2: And I remember just being like, tell me all the

329
00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:18,320
Speaker 2: bad words, and she would be like lube job loub.

330
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:22,320
Speaker 3: All of her bad words.

331
00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:25,080
Speaker 2: And that's why I'm assuming she was twelve, because I remember, like,

332
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,440
Speaker 2: I think it's kind of angus, that's what it was,

333
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:38,480
Speaker 2: lube job, submarining, which I still don't know what that was,

334
00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:44,280
Speaker 2: and then like the classics of the classics, like shit

335
00:16:44,360 --> 00:16:47,680
Speaker 2: cock butt ass, But I just always remember like lube

336
00:16:47,760 --> 00:16:51,880
Speaker 2: job and submarining. But I got her to write me

337
00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,280
Speaker 2: a love note. Have I ever told told the story

338
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:55,080
Speaker 2: on bananas?

339
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:56,240
Speaker 4: No?

340
00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:57,600
Speaker 3: Nothingindergarten?

341
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:00,560
Speaker 1: If it's a repeat, what am I gonna do?

342
00:17:00,640 --> 00:17:01,200
Speaker 3: Deal with it?

343
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:04,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, So she asked me, she was like, do you

344
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,840
Speaker 2: have any Again, she was just like a probably a

345
00:17:06,880 --> 00:17:10,840
Speaker 2: twelve year old pubescent or pre pubescent girl who just

346
00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:13,359
Speaker 2: was probably thinking about this stuff herself. So she asked me, like,

347
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,960
Speaker 2: do you have any crushes on anybody in school?

348
00:17:16,520 --> 00:17:18,200
Speaker 1: And I was like, yes, I have a crush. I

349
00:17:18,200 --> 00:17:21,320
Speaker 1: have crushes on three girls, I said, And for a

350
00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:24,280
Speaker 1: five year old, that's a lot a little perv and uh.

351
00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:26,360
Speaker 1: And she's like, well, you should write them a love note.

352
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,280
Speaker 1: And I was like that's a great idea. And I

353
00:17:28,320 --> 00:17:29,960
Speaker 1: was like, but I don't know how to write yet.

354
00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:35,880
Speaker 3: Great idea. The typewriter you dictate.

355
00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:38,840
Speaker 1: And she's like, well, I can help you.

356
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,000
Speaker 2: And I was like, all right again, this is like

357
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:43,359
Speaker 2: the weirdest agreement on tweet.

358
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:44,080
Speaker 3: This is sweet.

359
00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:45,800
Speaker 4: I was like, this doesn't sound that weird. I had

360
00:17:45,800 --> 00:17:47,840
Speaker 4: an older sister. This all checks out for me.

361
00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:49,720
Speaker 1: All right, well check it out. Check out what happens?

362
00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:51,120
Speaker 3: Uh.

363
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,600
Speaker 2: So we sit down and she's like, uh, you know,

364
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:54,879
Speaker 2: what do you want the love note to sound. I

365
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:56,840
Speaker 2: was like, I don't know. I like you, I've never

366
00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:58,640
Speaker 2: written a love note. This is my first love note,

367
00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:02,600
Speaker 2: you know, so, he writes. She writes a full page,

368
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:06,560
Speaker 2: a full page of stuff, but I don't I'm at five.

369
00:18:07,280 --> 00:18:09,720
Speaker 2: I can't imagine. Maybe I couldn't read it five. Maybe

370
00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:11,760
Speaker 2: I was learning to read it five. I mean, Olive's

371
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:15,159
Speaker 2: been reading way before that, but I could read. I

372
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:17,879
Speaker 2: can't remember. Oh yeah, but she writes all this stuff

373
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:20,880
Speaker 2: and I'm unaware of what it says. She writes three

374
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,240
Speaker 2: of them, full page of just a bunch.

375
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:24,440
Speaker 3: Of stuff you had the time.

376
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:27,439
Speaker 2: She folds it all up like in this very specific way,

377
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:30,160
Speaker 2: the way only like a twelve year old girl can yep,

378
00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:33,080
Speaker 2: and gives me the notes, labels them, gives them the notes,

379
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:35,159
Speaker 2: and then I go to school and at the end

380
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:37,919
Speaker 2: of school I find the three girls that I have

381
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:41,280
Speaker 2: a crush on again other five year old girls and

382
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,640
Speaker 2: give them each a love note.

383
00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:47,919
Speaker 1: At two of them could read and read it.

384
00:18:48,359 --> 00:18:51,200
Speaker 2: The third sounds good to me, could not read yet,

385
00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:53,720
Speaker 2: so brought it home and gave it to her mom

386
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,640
Speaker 2: to read because she's five.

387
00:18:55,680 --> 00:18:56,600
Speaker 1: Of course he's gonna do.

388
00:18:56,800 --> 00:18:57,200
Speaker 3: Yeah.

389
00:18:58,040 --> 00:19:03,840
Speaker 2: In the note, this lunatic had written stuff like I

390
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:07,679
Speaker 2: want to take you to bed and again written in

391
00:19:07,720 --> 00:19:10,240
Speaker 2: a way that like, oh boy, where like they don't

392
00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:14,000
Speaker 2: necessarily understand what it means, but they've maybe seen other

393
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:17,600
Speaker 2: things that reference, you know, sex or something like that.

394
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:21,680
Speaker 2: So it was a pretty risque love note saying that

395
00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:23,520
Speaker 2: I wanted to take these five year old girls to

396
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:27,239
Speaker 2: bed as a five year old guys. And so then

397
00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:29,720
Speaker 2: the next day I am brought in like this is

398
00:19:29,720 --> 00:19:32,040
Speaker 2: the only like I just brought into the principal's office.

399
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,879
Speaker 2: Of course I called in or like who wrote these notes?

400
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,919
Speaker 2: And my mom was like, oh my god, yeah, I

401
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,600
Speaker 2: threw that babysitter under the bus real hard, real fast,

402
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,040
Speaker 2: right there you did, and that I was very upset.

403
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:46,719
Speaker 1: Obviously we're all in trouble.

404
00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:47,960
Speaker 3: Uh.

405
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:50,120
Speaker 1: And then I got a lollipop. I remember at the end.

406
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,959
Speaker 2: Because I was five. I remember getting the lollipop. I

407
00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:57,960
Speaker 2: was a child, But just what a weird what a

408
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,359
Speaker 2: weird what a weird time?

409
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,440
Speaker 3: I'm stressed weird time. That is the strangest and weirdest time.

410
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,000
Speaker 3: But you were a good kid. I love that stuff.

411
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:08,800
Speaker 4: Also, back then, before word processes, before computers, before texting,

412
00:20:09,320 --> 00:20:13,080
Speaker 4: it was like you wrote notes, you pass notes. I like,

413
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:15,440
Speaker 4: somebody asked me, once, you have any of the notes

414
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:16,879
Speaker 4: you passed in high school? And I was like, I

415
00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:19,080
Speaker 4: do not. And then I went back to my parents'

416
00:20:19,119 --> 00:20:21,639
Speaker 4: house and they had like a like an old trunk

417
00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:23,440
Speaker 4: that I used to have, and I like went through

418
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:25,439
Speaker 4: it and there was like a box of high school

419
00:20:25,440 --> 00:20:29,000
Speaker 4: notes passed from girlfriends and friends. And the funniest was

420
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,160
Speaker 4: like all I didn't really clock it at the time

421
00:20:31,160 --> 00:20:34,240
Speaker 4: because it was normal. But like all the you know,

422
00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:37,960
Speaker 4: girls I dated in high school would like draw little

423
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,840
Speaker 4: palm trees on the notes all the time.

424
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:42,200
Speaker 3: They were very good at drawing little.

425
00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:45,480
Speaker 4: Palm trees, or a single eye, a very detailed eye

426
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:48,760
Speaker 4: with eyelashes. Just it was all the little doodles that

427
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 4: I was like probably too revved up to really pay

428
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:54,840
Speaker 4: attention to. But I hope They're all still out there

429
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:59,080
Speaker 4: drawing palm trees and single eyes. Nothing creepy about one

430
00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:01,880
Speaker 4: eye looking at you and algebra one.

431
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 2: It's so much fun to find that box. My box

432
00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:07,040
Speaker 2: is right here. This is this uh, this toolbox is

433
00:21:07,119 --> 00:21:09,080
Speaker 2: just filled with notes from high school.

434
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:10,560
Speaker 3: That's funny, but.

435
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,720
Speaker 2: It's still also because I was a strange child, obviously,

436
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:17,560
Speaker 2: I like smoked a pipe for a little while, and so.

437
00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:22,520
Speaker 4: It also come on, sure also sure it also smells

438
00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,159
Speaker 4: like pipe tobacco because I would hide my notes and

439
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:26,800
Speaker 4: my pipe tobacco in that box.

440
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,359
Speaker 3: Oh, best smell in the world.

441
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:31,840
Speaker 2: I love smell like if you get a dark cherry

442
00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:32,720
Speaker 2: pipe tobacco.

443
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,680
Speaker 3: Oh god, it smells good.

444
00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:38,639
Speaker 4: Does all right, I'll tease this into a little break

445
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:41,640
Speaker 4: how about that? Right, We're just one story and we're

446
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:44,240
Speaker 4: at a break time. Now, that's a good episode because

447
00:21:44,280 --> 00:21:49,280
Speaker 4: we're having fun. Melinda Walker, great name for anybody, Melinda Walker.

448
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:59,919
Speaker 4: Melinda Walker fights off intruders with guitar hero controller. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

449
00:22:00,160 --> 00:22:05,680
Speaker 2: That's some like naked kill stuff. M All right, let's look,

450
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,200
Speaker 2: I'm excited to get into that. Right after we come

451
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:53,160
Speaker 2: back on this episode of.

452
00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:43,200
Speaker 4: Welcome Back to bananas. We're back on bananas. Do you

453
00:22:43,240 --> 00:22:45,679
Speaker 4: have any banana mail this week? Anything come in? I

454
00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:46,560
Speaker 4: didn't see a ton.

455
00:22:47,359 --> 00:22:52,400
Speaker 2: One thing that's funny that I'll mention is uh. On Saturday,

456
00:22:52,560 --> 00:22:58,960
Speaker 2: took the kids to a pumpkin patch slash spreading zoo

457
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:02,280
Speaker 2: slash in latable playground, which I was like, Oh, this

458
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,040
Speaker 2: is gonna be great, this will kill some time, but

459
00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:09,200
Speaker 2: instead was just one meltdown after another. And then after

460
00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:11,040
Speaker 2: they melted down because they had to leave, we went

461
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 2: to this place called the Oykster on an.

462
00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,679
Speaker 1: Eagle oster so good and pull in.

463
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:19,080
Speaker 2: They're gonna get a treat. They're gonna get French fries

464
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:22,280
Speaker 2: and stuff. Still everyone's having a meltdown, read a table.

465
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:26,920
Speaker 2: Everyone's screaming. I look like the absolute worst parent in

466
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:30,880
Speaker 2: the world. And then someone's like, are you Kurt, And

467
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:37,399
Speaker 2: she's like, I'm a Bananamal Roy from Utah, Okay, from Utah.

468
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:39,960
Speaker 2: So I want to a shout out to Amberley who

469
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,560
Speaker 2: saw me just yell just streaming at my children love

470
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:45,480
Speaker 2: it outside.

471
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:45,680
Speaker 1: At the Oinkster.

472
00:23:45,720 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 2: It just happened to be in town with her partner

473
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:52,920
Speaker 2: from from Utah and just happened to hear me yell,

474
00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:56,080
Speaker 2: I'll have recognize my voice.

475
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:59,640
Speaker 1: Yes, so I thought was nice.

476
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:03,920
Speaker 4: Anyway, love bananimals in the wild, we love them. Yeah,

477
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:06,439
Speaker 4: I really only have two. One is we have a

478
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:10,440
Speaker 4: bananimal named Chris Tiger. Seems like real name Chris is

479
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,760
Speaker 4: having some serious back issues these days. I send him

480
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:15,800
Speaker 4: a postcard on our behalf. But we're gonna send him

481
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 4: a little gift box and stuff. Chris feel better, buddy.

482
00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:22,400
Speaker 4: I hope you heal quick. I know what you're going through. Hell, everybody,

483
00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:26,960
Speaker 4: every adult knows that backstuff, teeth stuff, and feet stuff

484
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 4: if you have those three things going on in your

485
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:32,560
Speaker 4: life as a living house. So we're sending you truly

486
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 4: all the best wishes. And if your name really is

487
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:38,000
Speaker 4: Chris Tiger, you have one of the coolest names ever,

488
00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:41,200
Speaker 4: hands down. And then just gotta say thanks to my

489
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:44,800
Speaker 4: my buddy boy Blake Anderson. He gave me a Savannah

490
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 4: Bananas jersey. A lot of you dm us and send

491
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:51,720
Speaker 4: us Savannah Bananas stuff. Yeah, and we love the Savannah

492
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:56,320
Speaker 4: Bana's baseball team in Savannah, Georgia. Beer once and we're

493
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:58,760
Speaker 4: gonna go to the only sports team. Kurt and I

494
00:24:58,840 --> 00:25:02,000
Speaker 4: definitely love I love what you're doing so, thank you

495
00:25:02,040 --> 00:25:03,000
Speaker 4: Blake for the jersey.

496
00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:06,159
Speaker 3: I'll probably wear it one of the tour dates.

497
00:25:07,320 --> 00:25:11,920
Speaker 4: And that is it for Banana mao for me, right

498
00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:12,840
Speaker 4: and I.

499
00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 1: Speaking of what we're wearing at the live shows, I

500
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,760
Speaker 1: got my yellow suit in the mail and it is

501
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:19,480
Speaker 1: made of plastic, so.

502
00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:25,160
Speaker 4: You're gonna be Cook's gonna look weird and crinkly. Hey

503
00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 4: it's there, so give me the story. Okay. Melinda Walker

504
00:25:28,800 --> 00:25:32,320
Speaker 4: fights off intruders with guitar hero controller. This was sent

505
00:25:32,359 --> 00:25:36,240
Speaker 4: in by Crutch Wheels. This was on HuffPo, but no writers,

506
00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:39,800
Speaker 4: so we'll just say Huffington Post. Okay, media missed in

507
00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:43,199
Speaker 4: the biz. Now that's a guitar hero. Melinda Walker of

508
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:46,480
Speaker 4: Fort Wayne, Indiana. Fort Wayne, Indiana. We're going there on

509
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:49,840
Speaker 4: our tour there. Actually, let's get Melinda Walker out there.

510
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 4: Was home with her five year old grandson Sunday when

511
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:56,679
Speaker 4: three men barged in and demanded she give them cash,

512
00:25:56,840 --> 00:25:58,320
Speaker 4: and the TV W.

513
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:01,840
Speaker 3: A n E reported that is terrifying. We are not

514
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:04,960
Speaker 3: for it. We're not for it. Don't dump feces on people,

515
00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:06,240
Speaker 3: don't scare grannies.

516
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 2: Mm mmm this again, we're pro granny across the board. Okay,

517
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:16,480
Speaker 2: absolutely no home invasions, no, no dumping feces on them though, no.

518
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:21,080
Speaker 4: Thank you less you're in Frankfurt, sorry Germany. The intruders

519
00:26:21,080 --> 00:26:23,080
Speaker 4: told her they had a gun, but Walker says she

520
00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:26,240
Speaker 4: couldn't see you one. I like where this is going already.

521
00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:29,959
Speaker 4: A guitar Hero video game controller was lying on the floor,

522
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,800
Speaker 4: and I just reached down and picked it up and

523
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:33,520
Speaker 4: told him to get the hell out of my house.

524
00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:35,320
Speaker 4: Get the hell out of my house, Get out of

525
00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:37,880
Speaker 4: my house. I just kept smacking one of them. I mean,

526
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:39,320
Speaker 4: this is amazing.

527
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,960
Speaker 3: We are not for assault, but we were for defending

528
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:43,240
Speaker 3: your house with a guitar.

529
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 4: Walk plastic guitar that's like the size of your like forearm.

530
00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,600
Speaker 4: I bet you could get some serious velocity on that day.

531
00:26:52,359 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 4: Walker then said she pushed the one that wouldn't shut

532
00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 4: up down the stairs.

533
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 3: We love Melinda Walker so much. Oh my god.

534
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:04,520
Speaker 4: Eventually, the trio, she estimates for between fifteen and twenty

535
00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:08,080
Speaker 4: one teenagers of the worst fled without taking anything. The

536
00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:10,800
Speaker 4: woman says that one time in the past, robbers had

537
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:12,879
Speaker 4: made off with her flat screen TV, but she was

538
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:15,840
Speaker 4: just not gonna let it happen again. Quote I might

539
00:27:15,880 --> 00:27:17,840
Speaker 4: not be a strong woman, I might not be a

540
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,639
Speaker 4: well woman, but you're not gonna get my stuff. And quote, wow,

541
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:25,160
Speaker 4: Walker isn't the only brave lady to thought would be robbers. Recently,

542
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:29,040
Speaker 4: on Monday, ninety six year old grocery store worker Margarita

543
00:27:29,119 --> 00:27:31,720
Speaker 4: Wolf another great name.

544
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:36,639
Speaker 2: Ah, that's an amazing name, Margaretta Wolf. I mean I

545
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,800
Speaker 2: want just a plaza to be named after her.

546
00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:40,720
Speaker 3: No joke.

547
00:27:40,760 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 4: Well they should do it, because she came face to

548
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 4: face with a knife wielding man who demanded cash, and

549
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:48,840
Speaker 4: she said no, I said, you're not opening that register.

550
00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:49,439
Speaker 3: And that's it.

551
00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 4: I'm not opening it either. I said, you can have

552
00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:53,920
Speaker 4: all the TUTSI rolls you want, but I'm not opening

553
00:27:53,920 --> 00:27:58,360
Speaker 4: that cash register. The would be robber left. So shout

554
00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:02,199
Speaker 4: out to Margarita Wolfe. Shout out to Melinda Walker for

555
00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 4: standing up and defending yourself.

556
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 3: So it's amazing. Oh man, it made me so happy,

557
00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:10,679
Speaker 3: Marguerita Wolf. Oh my god.

558
00:28:11,200 --> 00:28:14,680
Speaker 2: At the same time, I would immediately let them take

559
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 2: the register.

560
00:28:16,000 --> 00:28:17,960
Speaker 3: Yes, we're cowards. They're a lot tougher them.

561
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,159
Speaker 2: I would be like, uh, oh the stores register, not

562
00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:23,040
Speaker 2: my Yeah, go ahead, please please.

563
00:28:23,600 --> 00:28:26,240
Speaker 4: I also love the line you can have all the

564
00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,200
Speaker 4: toutsy rolls you want. That is a great line for

565
00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 4: almost anything, like yes, like hey you want to step outside,

566
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 4: you go no, but you can have all the toutsy

567
00:28:35,400 --> 00:28:37,879
Speaker 4: rolls you want and then just walk away.

568
00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:40,760
Speaker 3: They will think about it for years and years to come.

569
00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:46,680
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I have I have, Thank God? Oh

570
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:47,800
Speaker 1: you know what I have been.

571
00:28:47,880 --> 00:28:50,040
Speaker 2: I'm just I was gonna say, I've I've never had

572
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:53,960
Speaker 2: to defend myself in a in a mugging or something,

573
00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:56,960
Speaker 2: but I have. I have because I've lived in Baltimore.

574
00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:00,320
Speaker 2: You never Yeah, I think I've told. I've told the story.

575
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 3: I think you did. But you you fought a DJ,

576
00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:04,080
Speaker 3: didn't you? Or something?

577
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:09,680
Speaker 2: Wasn't that something that was ridiculous? That was I don't

578
00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 2: even understand how that happened. Yay, there was a it

579
00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,120
Speaker 2: was a late at night. I have a whole I

580
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:17,480
Speaker 2: won't like go into the whole thing because it's online

581
00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 2: if you want to go see it. I think it's

582
00:29:19,360 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 2: called Kurt Fight's a DJ. But yeah, it's my only

583
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:25,960
Speaker 2: bar fight ever was with a with a DJ after

584
00:29:26,320 --> 00:29:28,760
Speaker 2: a show. And I don't even know how the fight

585
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:32,040
Speaker 2: started or why it happened. Of course, not I'm unaware,

586
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:34,680
Speaker 2: but well outside on the side of it's not your fault.

587
00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:37,080
Speaker 4: I've been around you a lot of times in all

588
00:29:37,400 --> 00:29:40,240
Speaker 4: versions of kurred, and I've never seen you aggressively go

589
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 4: after anybody. We we mind our own bit, we create

590
00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 4: our own dumb fun. We don't go looking for bad fun.

591
00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:52,600
Speaker 4: So yes, oh boy, I've had this one in my

592
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 4: little mint Mobile notebook that they gave a stay one.

593
00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 3: I'm excited. I'm excited.

594
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:02,200
Speaker 4: So in like two thousand, in let's say eight, I

595
00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 4: had lived in Pensacola two thousand.

596
00:30:05,440 --> 00:30:06,560
Speaker 3: I've mentioned that before.

597
00:30:06,600 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 4: In two thousand and one, so I hadn't been back

598
00:30:08,960 --> 00:30:11,960
Speaker 4: in like six or seven years. I reached out to

599
00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,000
Speaker 4: some friends and I went down for one of those

600
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 4: visits that when you kind of go back to a

601
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:18,040
Speaker 4: place you used to live, you reach out to the

602
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 4: four or five people that were your closest friends.

603
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:21,160
Speaker 3: You know.

604
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 4: Maybe I was gonna buy some bushwhackers and kind of

605
00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 4: one on one was just going to check in on

606
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:29,520
Speaker 4: everybody and be like, how you doing, how's the family, whatever,

607
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:32,000
Speaker 4: Like did you switch jobs or you still This is

608
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,840
Speaker 4: seven years after you, seven years after i'd seen any

609
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:37,760
Speaker 4: of these people, and you know, a little bit before

610
00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 4: social media and smartphones too, like we all kind of

611
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,480
Speaker 4: had that stuff, but it just we were reconnecting.

612
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:43,600
Speaker 3: I was really looking forward to it.

613
00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:47,240
Speaker 4: So the last person who was the most enthusiastic, person

614
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:51,400
Speaker 4: who wanted to hang out with me the most, was like, dude,

615
00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:54,640
Speaker 4: I live here now in this apartment complex. I would

616
00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:58,320
Speaker 4: love to see you come over. I think it was

617
00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:02,960
Speaker 4: I think it was Friday night. And I'm gonna call

618
00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:03,960
Speaker 4: this dude.

619
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:05,720
Speaker 3: Stan.

620
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:08,840
Speaker 4: Okay, we're gonna call him Stan, not real name. He

621
00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:11,840
Speaker 4: was a Stan of hanging out and he was Stan.

622
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 3: And we're calling him Stan. Uh.

623
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,640
Speaker 4: And so he's the last night. I'm gonna fly out

624
00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:19,360
Speaker 4: the next day. But he is like pumped. He's like

625
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:22,600
Speaker 4: this is incredible. He's like, I'm so happy to see you, dude.

626
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:24,840
Speaker 4: I talk about you all the time. I'm having a

627
00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:27,840
Speaker 4: couple of friends over every Friday night. We do this,

628
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:31,800
Speaker 4: so like we we have a hang. We're all divorced dudes,

629
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 4: and so all these guys are twenty six, twenty seven

630
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 4: divorce dudes.

631
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:39,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh my god. Okay, wow, get married. There happens earlier.

632
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 4: Okay, Yeah, all from the Deep South, all live in

633
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 4: Pensacola Beach.

634
00:31:43,760 --> 00:31:43,920
Speaker 3: Now.

635
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:47,400
Speaker 4: So I show up, you know, at like six, and

636
00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:50,680
Speaker 4: when Stan opens the door, he is just sweaty as

637
00:31:50,800 --> 00:31:54,320
Speaker 4: sweaty can be. And I look behind him and they

638
00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:58,240
Speaker 4: are playing that game rock band. Remember that game where

639
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 4: it was like a guitar, a drum and then a mic.

640
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,400
Speaker 4: And he's like, come on in. He's like, we do this.

641
00:32:05,000 --> 00:32:08,160
Speaker 4: We're like a band. He's like, we're a band. And

642
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:12,280
Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, of tapping, of tapping, Yeah, we're really

643
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,160
Speaker 4: good at tapping and drumming. And I meet the other

644
00:32:14,160 --> 00:32:17,440
Speaker 4: two guys, one named Frank. One's nickname was Hasselhoff. Those

645
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:21,040
Speaker 4: are real. If none of these three people listen to

646
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 4: the podcast, I've since lost touch with all of these people.

647
00:32:24,000 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 4: So so, but he was like, Bud, it's so good

648
00:32:27,440 --> 00:32:30,160
Speaker 4: to see you, huge sweaty. Oh he's shirtless too. He's

649
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:32,360
Speaker 4: shirtless and sweating and he gives me this big hug,

650
00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:34,320
Speaker 4: like picks me up. He's like, it's so good to

651
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:38,600
Speaker 4: see you. So I'm wet now, and so we're we

652
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,239
Speaker 4: go in Friday night. This is what they do. They

653
00:32:40,240 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 4: play rock band for hours and hours they've been practicing.

654
00:32:42,880 --> 00:32:45,480
Speaker 4: This is like week six. They want to show off.

655
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,040
Speaker 4: One of them sings kind of bad, but he is

656
00:32:47,120 --> 00:32:50,720
Speaker 4: hitting these weird notes. So they're like, do you want

657
00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 4: to sing, dude? And for anybody who knows me, is

658
00:32:53,120 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 4: I can. I can talk sing in a real deep voice,

659
00:32:55,960 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 4: like but not well in any other voice. So I

660
00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 4: was like, dude, I'll just watch butt. He's like, here,

661
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:04,280
Speaker 4: grab a beer. So I'm watching three grown men and

662
00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:07,520
Speaker 4: having conversations in between songs, and they're getting pumped and

663
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:10,280
Speaker 4: they're singing like Leonard Skinner or something. And he stopped

664
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:14,160
Speaker 4: and just casually stand and Hasselhoff walk over to the

665
00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:18,680
Speaker 4: corner of the living room and and uh almostly his

666
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:21,959
Speaker 4: real name Stan, pulls down his pants, does a headstand,

667
00:33:22,440 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 4: and Hasselhoff pours h Jaegermeister into a small funnel up

668
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,120
Speaker 4: his butt or down his butt, I guess because he

669
00:33:29,200 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 4: was doing a headstand.

670
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:35,400
Speaker 3: What then they crack up laughing. Uh.

671
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:39,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, he walks over to the corner, he pulls, Yeah,

672
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:39,800
Speaker 4: he pulls.

673
00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,360
Speaker 2: His pants down face. He always face in the corner,

674
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:46,360
Speaker 2: so his butt is exposed. Yes, then and then a

675
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:50,000
Speaker 2: headstand does a headstand, which is not also incredible.

676
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: It's not easy to do a headstand either handstand.

677
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:57,000
Speaker 4: And then Hasselhoff not his real name, just this nickname.

678
00:33:57,040 --> 00:33:59,360
Speaker 4: I don't have to funnel up his asshole. Well, yeah,

679
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 4: we're down, depending on the gravity, and then pours a

680
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:06,720
Speaker 4: pretty solid amount of Jaegermeister in there, like I would say, Wow,

681
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:12,000
Speaker 4: probably a rocks glass size of yaeger uh all the

682
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:16,080
Speaker 4: way down They're a cold frosty bottle. Then they he

683
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 4: comes back down, he kind of pulls his pants up,

684
00:34:18,760 --> 00:34:20,560
Speaker 4: and then they continue playing rock band.

685
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 3: Nobody says anything, nobody.

686
00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:26,080
Speaker 4: I'm talking to Frank just like and he's like, oh, yeah, dude,

687
00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:28,359
Speaker 4: So how's Brooklyn. Oh that's cool. It's all you were

688
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:30,400
Speaker 4: doing blah blah blah. And like I'm like yeah, He's like, oh,

689
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:31,880
Speaker 4: I've never been up there, what's it like?

690
00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 3: You know whatever. So then they keep going.

691
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:38,960
Speaker 4: They alternate taking playing songs and then doing headstands and

692
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:40,839
Speaker 4: pouring Yeger in each other's butts.

693
00:34:40,520 --> 00:34:41,960
Speaker 3: For about four hours.

694
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:45,719
Speaker 4: Now, there are people that listen to this podcasts that

695
00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:50,440
Speaker 4: I'm sure have done this butt chugged. It is the

696
00:34:50,560 --> 00:34:53,520
Speaker 4: drunkest I've ever seen any four people. And so the

697
00:34:53,640 --> 00:34:57,560
Speaker 4: quality of the rock band performances is going down so

698
00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 4: severely stand. So I'm like, hey, I'm gonna go. He's like,

699
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 4: do You're not going? He's like you were not going?

700
00:35:04,600 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 4: Like he's so drunk. He's like, we don't even get

701
00:35:06,680 --> 00:35:09,880
Speaker 4: to talk. I'm like, dude, they're knocking over their own equipment.

702
00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:15,840
Speaker 4: Stan eventually trips over his open washing dishwasher and breaks

703
00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:18,480
Speaker 4: the glass in his hand and then he's bleeding and

704
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:21,600
Speaker 4: I'm like, hey, dude. And so now they're out of Yeager.

705
00:35:21,680 --> 00:35:25,680
Speaker 4: It's all up their butts there. It was almost like

706
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:29,000
Speaker 4: watching robots running out of batteries but then just stumbling

707
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,840
Speaker 4: around and I wanted to go now for two hours. Yeah,

708
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:35,880
Speaker 4: And so they are like, dude, you gotta sing, you

709
00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:37,480
Speaker 4: gotta be in and I'm like, I'm not, guys, i

710
00:35:37,480 --> 00:35:37,960
Speaker 4: gotta go.

711
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:38,840
Speaker 3: And then I come on.

712
00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:41,160
Speaker 4: I'm like, I haven't even seen you guys like nail

713
00:35:41,200 --> 00:35:42,960
Speaker 4: one of these yet, like I like messed with their

714
00:35:43,000 --> 00:35:46,680
Speaker 4: egos enough. And they're like what And so they put

715
00:35:46,719 --> 00:35:49,640
Speaker 4: on This is the last time I've seen Stan, by

716
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:51,640
Speaker 4: the way, this was my last memory of this man.

717
00:35:52,280 --> 00:35:55,680
Speaker 4: They go play that one, they do the go Gos.

718
00:35:56,000 --> 00:35:59,839
Speaker 4: We got the beat so drunkenly that I snuck out

719
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:03,480
Speaker 4: while they were playing, ran to my rental car and

720
00:36:03,560 --> 00:36:06,959
Speaker 4: drove away like I like, closed door slowly and they're

721
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:12,799
Speaker 4: just going they're singing in Unison. It was one of

722
00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:16,279
Speaker 4: the strangers. God, he's never reached out. He like, I

723
00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 4: used to have Facebook and stuff. He never said hey.

724
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:20,759
Speaker 4: And then one time he called me once He's like,

725
00:36:20,760 --> 00:36:23,600
Speaker 4: I'm driving across Texas, I'm thinking about you, dude. But

726
00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:26,799
Speaker 4: it was I've never felt. It must be what Jane

727
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 4: Goodall felt the first time she went out in the

728
00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:33,080
Speaker 4: jungle with the gorillas and to them. This was Friday

729
00:36:33,160 --> 00:36:37,400
Speaker 4: Night in Pensacola, which I should title a movie Friday

730
00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 4: Night in Pensacola.

731
00:36:38,600 --> 00:36:40,320
Speaker 3: Oh but yeah, God, See.

732
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 4: Any time I've ever seen it, I've heard other people

733
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 4: say they've done it. I've seen people leave the room

734
00:36:44,040 --> 00:36:48,080
Speaker 4: and say they've done it. But to watch time a friend.

735
00:36:48,440 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 2: You've seen people leave a room and then come back

736
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:54,160
Speaker 2: and been like I just butt chugged Jaegermeister.

737
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:56,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, they're saying like we're shoving stuff up our butts,

738
00:36:56,680 --> 00:36:57,919
Speaker 4: and we're like pouring stuff up our butts.

739
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:00,560
Speaker 3: The Red House in New Orleans. You and I went

740
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:01,760
Speaker 3: to the Treehouse of Death.

741
00:37:02,120 --> 00:37:05,040
Speaker 4: Somebody went to the bathroom and then came out and

742
00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:07,000
Speaker 4: was like, just let me know of my butts leaking.

743
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,560
Speaker 4: And I was like, oh, I thought they had sex

744
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:11,239
Speaker 4: or something. I was like, oh, what's going on? And

745
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:13,880
Speaker 4: then they were like, yeah, we just poured airplane bottles

746
00:37:14,200 --> 00:37:14,840
Speaker 4: up our butts.

747
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:17,600
Speaker 3: And I'm like, ah right, I mean like that's.

748
00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:23,320
Speaker 1: I'm so I guess it does it get you more drunk?

749
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:23,720
Speaker 3: Also?

750
00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 1: What why?

751
00:37:25,719 --> 00:37:26,759
Speaker 3: Apparently it does?

752
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:31,040
Speaker 1: But I mean okay, I.

753
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:33,320
Speaker 3: Mean so they were the they were.

754
00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:37,040
Speaker 4: The Motley Crew of two thousand and eight Pensacola Beach

755
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:40,399
Speaker 4: off Spanish Trail Road or wherever we were. But it

756
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,480
Speaker 4: was it was so jarring, like I froze and then

757
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:45,160
Speaker 4: I had to act like I was cool with it.

758
00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:48,080
Speaker 3: And then I'm thinking, like, so, no, whatever, you didn't.

759
00:37:48,160 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 1: You didn't bring it up.

760
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:51,439
Speaker 2: You weren't just like, oh, hey are you guys poor?

761
00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:54,359
Speaker 2: I noticed you seemed to be pouring Jaegermeister up your pie?

762
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:56,959
Speaker 2: Did say to that you just like yeah, of course?

763
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:59,560
Speaker 4: Because I also I had to see all their balls

764
00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:02,040
Speaker 4: and wing and stuff, and I'm like not into that.

765
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:04,239
Speaker 3: And so I was like, I was like, so is

766
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:05,480
Speaker 3: this just your guys thing?

767
00:38:05,520 --> 00:38:07,640
Speaker 4: You just do this and they were like, it's crazy,

768
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:09,680
Speaker 4: it gets you so messed up. And then they played

769
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:13,080
Speaker 4: like them bones by alsin chains and keep going. I

770
00:38:13,239 --> 00:38:15,520
Speaker 4: really felt like they got to a level of drunk

771
00:38:15,600 --> 00:38:18,400
Speaker 4: where not only were they blackout, but they really believed

772
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,000
Speaker 4: they were in a band. And I think that was

773
00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 4: the appeal of the whole thing, right right, right, right right, Yeah,

774
00:38:22,960 --> 00:38:24,279
Speaker 4: and that's why he never reached out.

775
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:25,960
Speaker 1: He was just like Scotty and I had a great

776
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:28,799
Speaker 1: night last night, yeah, and like it, there's no At

777
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:33,120
Speaker 1: some point he browned out moments after you arrived and

778
00:38:33,160 --> 00:38:35,880
Speaker 1: then was completely gone by the time you left.

779
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:38,319
Speaker 4: Yeah, And I didn't do it. They didn't, and they

780
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,279
Speaker 4: didn't ask me if I wanted to try it. And

781
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,080
Speaker 4: also they didn't ask me if I wanted to shot

782
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:44,360
Speaker 4: a Yeggermeister, which is also funny because they could have

783
00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:45,480
Speaker 4: been like, you want a shot, and I would be

784
00:38:45,520 --> 00:38:51,080
Speaker 4: like no, no, but literally falling over playing rock band

785
00:38:51,160 --> 00:38:53,839
Speaker 4: and then scream singing we got the beat. I mean,

786
00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:58,000
Speaker 4: the neighbors must have lost their minds. But I knew

787
00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,719
Speaker 4: it was time to go when he fell over his

788
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:01,920
Speaker 4: own an open dishwasher and broke his hand on a

789
00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 4: pine class At that point, You're just like, this is

790
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:06,800
Speaker 4: gonna end with all of us dying.

791
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:09,440
Speaker 3: We're all gonna die. What a way to go.

792
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:16,320
Speaker 2: Wow, it does feel like you entered a layover stop,

793
00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:20,760
Speaker 2: you know, in like the in the underworld, like a version,

794
00:39:20,920 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 2: like you know, like you got off the boat that

795
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:30,319
Speaker 2: Karen drives Labyrinth. Oh, you went off kind of an

796
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:34,160
Speaker 2: early room before Hell. It's not her, it's not Purgatory

797
00:39:34,200 --> 00:39:36,080
Speaker 2: and it's not Hell. It's just this other roum where

798
00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:38,719
Speaker 2: those guys do that in for infinity.

799
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you know, find what you love and let

800
00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:41,960
Speaker 3: it kill you.

801
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:42,200
Speaker 4: Right.

802
00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:46,439
Speaker 3: It was. It was beautiful. It was the symphony of life.

803
00:39:46,520 --> 00:39:49,600
Speaker 2: Kurt, Yeah, beautiful, beautiful you guys, are you ready for

804
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:50,040
Speaker 2: another one?

805
00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 3: God? Switch it up, change lanes for us.

806
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:57,440
Speaker 2: Ontario woman wakes to meteorite landing on her pillow.

807
00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:01,080
Speaker 4: Yes, I also was going to do this one. Incredible

808
00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:03,240
Speaker 4: story sent in by so many great animals.

809
00:40:03,239 --> 00:40:09,280
Speaker 1: Here, you got so many. I have Deanna Bigstone sending

810
00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:10,400
Speaker 1: it in to me.

811
00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:13,200
Speaker 3: First. Who do you have, Scottie? I got it. I

812
00:40:13,239 --> 00:40:15,920
Speaker 3: gotta scroll because I had a bunch, But.

813
00:40:18,120 --> 00:40:21,040
Speaker 2: You go, this is this was published in you p

814
00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:24,840
Speaker 2: I I'm actually enjoying I searched this is This was

815
00:40:25,440 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 2: reported by many many news outlets. U p I tends

816
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:33,439
Speaker 2: to have the best headlines. It's UPI or Daily Mail.

817
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:38,160
Speaker 2: Daily Mail has great headlines, but physically operating on the

818
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:43,839
Speaker 2: Daily Mail's website it is so difficult. There's every there's

819
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:47,400
Speaker 2: like eight hundred boxes that continually pop up in while

820
00:40:47,440 --> 00:40:50,680
Speaker 2: you scroll. It's as if they don't reading news in

821
00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:54,520
Speaker 2: any way. Shape don't they actively prevent you from reading.

822
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,040
Speaker 2: This was in the u p I written by Ben Hooper.

823
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:02,439
Speaker 2: Here it is A British Columbia woman received an unusual

824
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:07,359
Speaker 2: rude awakening when a meteorite crashed through her roof and

825
00:41:07,520 --> 00:41:10,800
Speaker 2: landed on her pillow. Ruth Hamilton said she was asleep

826
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 2: at her golden home Golden it must be a town.

827
00:41:14,640 --> 00:41:16,840
Speaker 2: I don't think he's just describing her home as golden.

828
00:41:17,120 --> 00:41:19,840
Speaker 2: When she became vaguely aware of her dog barking in

829
00:41:19,880 --> 00:41:22,799
Speaker 2: the house. The next thing was just a huge explosion

830
00:41:22,920 --> 00:41:26,280
Speaker 2: and debris all over my face, Hamilton told CBC News.

831
00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:28,680
Speaker 2: Hamilton said she got out of bed and turned on

832
00:41:28,680 --> 00:41:31,240
Speaker 2: the lights, revealing something had punched a hole in her ceiling.

833
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:33,120
Speaker 2: I didn't know what else to do, so I called

834
00:41:33,200 --> 00:41:35,720
Speaker 2: nine one one. Talking to the operator. She was asking

835
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:37,480
Speaker 2: me all kinds of questions, and at that point I

836
00:41:37,560 --> 00:41:40,600
Speaker 2: rolled back one of the two pillows I'd been sleeping,

837
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:46,000
Speaker 2: and in between them was the meteorite. Insane, it's so crazy,

838
00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:49,399
Speaker 2: Hamilton said, the melon sized space rock.

839
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:52,960
Speaker 3: This is it was big mediorite. This is a melon.

840
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:56,520
Speaker 2: It's like a cantalop sized space rock. I just landed

841
00:41:56,800 --> 00:42:00,719
Speaker 2: just inches from her head. I mean, when you're not

842
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:04,319
Speaker 2: like sometimes deaths are so absurd, you're like that that

843
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:06,839
Speaker 2: was the way the person was supposed to go, absolutely,

844
00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:09,399
Speaker 2: and but when something like this happens, it's like you

845
00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:13,239
Speaker 2: have something to do. The universe has spared you for

846
00:42:13,320 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 2: a reason.

847
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 3: That's right, you're right.

848
00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:20,000
Speaker 1: For traveling millions of miles. Happened to land an inch

849
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:21,400
Speaker 1: from your head. That's amazing.

850
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:21,799
Speaker 3: Yeah.

851
00:42:21,840 --> 00:42:23,799
Speaker 4: I wonder if she had like a recent breakup too,

852
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:26,200
Speaker 4: Like I wonder if the day before, like her partner

853
00:42:26,320 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 4: was laying there and he's like, you know what, this

854
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:31,200
Speaker 4: just isn't right. I don't feel anymore. And she's sleeping alone,

855
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:33,400
Speaker 4: she has her hand on the cold side of the bed,

856
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:36,280
Speaker 4: and then that happens, and you're like the right choice

857
00:42:36,320 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 4: was made.

858
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:37,600
Speaker 3: Uh huh.

859
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:40,600
Speaker 2: A police officer came to Hamilton's home and they initially

860
00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 2: suspected the rock may have been the result of construction,

861
00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:46,359
Speaker 2: not the nearboy kicking nearby Kicking Horse Canyon. But they

862
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 2: called there and there was no uh at least if

863
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:52,200
Speaker 2: they were doing any blasting, and they weren't. But they

864
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:54,319
Speaker 2: did say they had seen a bright light in the

865
00:42:54,360 --> 00:42:58,719
Speaker 2: sky that that had exploded and caused some booms.

866
00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:01,759
Speaker 3: Oh they did see that. Yeah, news just swept that

867
00:43:01,920 --> 00:43:03,320
Speaker 3: under the rug. Yeah.

868
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:07,600
Speaker 1: Experts at Western University in London, Ontario, confirmed the rock

869
00:43:08,000 --> 00:43:12,040
Speaker 1: that landed in Hamilton Hamilton's bed was indeed a meteorite.

870
00:43:12,080 --> 00:43:15,240
Speaker 2: It certainly is a meteorite, said Peter Brown. Bob coveted

871
00:43:15,360 --> 00:43:20,800
Speaker 2: our got them a professor with the university's Physics and

872
00:43:20,840 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 2: Astronomy department. Everything about the story was consistent with a

873
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:26,719
Speaker 2: meteorite fall, meaning it came from this guy. And the

874
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:29,239
Speaker 2: fact that this bright fireball had occurred basically right at

875
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:34,080
Speaker 2: the same time. So cool, this amazing, It's amazing.

876
00:43:34,640 --> 00:43:37,239
Speaker 3: Hamilton said the experience has given her a new perspective

877
00:43:37,280 --> 00:43:37,959
Speaker 3: on life. Quote.

878
00:43:38,000 --> 00:43:39,600
Speaker 2: The only thing I can think of saying is life

879
00:43:39,640 --> 00:43:41,800
Speaker 2: is precious and it could be gone at any moment,

880
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:43,880
Speaker 2: even when you think you are safe and secure in

881
00:43:43,880 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 2: your bed. She said, I hope I never take it

882
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:49,800
Speaker 2: for granted. Again, Hamilton coming away with the right lesson

883
00:43:50,280 --> 00:43:52,840
Speaker 2: h from a media rite and she gets to keep it.

884
00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:55,120
Speaker 3: She gets to keep that. It's the main question.

885
00:43:55,360 --> 00:43:58,480
Speaker 4: All the ban animals are screaming at their stereos and

886
00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:01,359
Speaker 4: awesome you get to keep but meteorite that is.

887
00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:02,680
Speaker 3: Almost killed you.

888
00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:06,919
Speaker 2: Yes, I would make I would redesign my house, yes,

889
00:44:07,000 --> 00:44:09,960
Speaker 2: to have the meteorite be the focus of the house.

890
00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 4: Absolutely. I would name it Chunky. I would introduce people.

891
00:44:13,560 --> 00:44:16,120
Speaker 4: They could take pictures with it for two dollars, so like,

892
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:18,840
Speaker 4: come on in, sit with Chunky, ask it a question.

893
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:22,839
Speaker 3: It knows things. I love her.

894
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:25,480
Speaker 2: I used to have a joke early on which was

895
00:44:26,880 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 2: different facts about dolphins, and it was uh well, Oh.

896
00:44:32,880 --> 00:44:35,880
Speaker 2: The American sent the first dolphin to space in nineteen

897
00:44:35,960 --> 00:44:40,040
Speaker 2: sixty seven. His name was Spacey and died instantly. The

898
00:44:40,120 --> 00:44:44,279
Speaker 2: Russians sent of dolphin to space in nineteen seventy one.

899
00:44:44,400 --> 00:44:50,760
Speaker 2: His name was space Chick. He also died instantly. Yeah, dolphin,

900
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 2: spacey and Chunky space and Chunky mm mmmmmmmmm.

901
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:58,040
Speaker 4: That's a yeah, that is a weird one. But man,

902
00:44:58,160 --> 00:44:59,959
Speaker 4: you're right. She should have been on the first play

903
00:45:00,600 --> 00:45:03,840
Speaker 4: first plane to Biloxi, Mississippi, into the Bow of Oz.

904
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:06,400
Speaker 4: She should have put it all on her lucky number

905
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:10,240
Speaker 4: on the Rulett wheel. That is the true lottery of life.

906
00:45:10,239 --> 00:45:12,600
Speaker 4: That's a lottery of the universe. Really it is.

907
00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's beautiful.

908
00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 2: I mean, it just reminds you that the universe is

909
00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:20,960
Speaker 2: a strange and wonderful place. When a rock from the

910
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:24,560
Speaker 2: asteroid belt, so it happens to get a little loose,

911
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:27,520
Speaker 2: oh yeah, and because it wants to snuggle.

912
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:30,319
Speaker 3: With you. Yeah.

913
00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:33,359
Speaker 4: I dated a sleep talker, you know, like there are

914
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:36,400
Speaker 4: a lot of people talking, but I dated one for

915
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:40,200
Speaker 4: woman for a couple of years who talked pretty regularly

916
00:45:40,239 --> 00:45:42,399
Speaker 4: in her sleep enough where you could interact with her too.

917
00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:44,600
Speaker 4: Or she would be like for real, yeah, it would

918
00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:46,719
Speaker 4: be like you're not going behind that building, And then

919
00:45:46,719 --> 00:45:48,759
Speaker 4: I would be like, well what if I do? And

920
00:45:48,800 --> 00:45:50,920
Speaker 4: then she'd be like, oh, come on and go to

921
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,279
Speaker 4: sleep again. And it was always stuff like it would

922
00:45:53,280 --> 00:45:55,040
Speaker 4: be like it would be like, hey, I think the

923
00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:57,000
Speaker 4: boat left, and you're like, did the boat leave where

924
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:58,759
Speaker 4: we supposed to be on it, and then it would

925
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,239
Speaker 4: be like a total pivot and would be like some

926
00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:03,840
Speaker 4: days you just gotta get up and you're like what,

927
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:05,759
Speaker 4: I'm like, are you awake right now?

928
00:46:05,800 --> 00:46:06,920
Speaker 3: And then just asleep.

929
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:10,319
Speaker 4: But one night, and I don't think I talked about

930
00:46:10,360 --> 00:46:14,080
Speaker 4: this one on the podcast, she I wake up and

931
00:46:14,120 --> 00:46:17,080
Speaker 4: I feel like her hand on my stomach, which is

932
00:46:17,120 --> 00:46:18,960
Speaker 4: not you know, wasn't weird for us, so for her

933
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,200
Speaker 4: any couple, really, that's a very natural way to be.

934
00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:23,799
Speaker 4: But then I felt her like fingers turn into like

935
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:27,280
Speaker 4: a little fist, and then I felt the fist rise

936
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:30,680
Speaker 4: up my belly and up my chest and up my

937
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:34,040
Speaker 4: chin and then just push my chin up like the

938
00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:37,920
Speaker 4: world's most subtle punch, not a real punch, just like

939
00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:41,160
Speaker 4: dragging it up, tilting my head up. And I'm like, honey,

940
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 4: and she's like, I'm like, are you punching me in

941
00:46:44,719 --> 00:46:48,120
Speaker 4: the face? And she doesn't say anything. And then like

942
00:46:48,160 --> 00:46:51,040
Speaker 4: about an hour later, she starts talking and she's really talking,

943
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:55,160
Speaker 4: and I'm responding to her, and she's I can't remember

944
00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:57,239
Speaker 4: something about a rope, but I can't remember what it was.

945
00:46:57,760 --> 00:47:00,799
Speaker 4: And then finally I go, well, okay, we can deal

946
00:47:00,800 --> 00:47:03,319
Speaker 4: with that tomorrow. And she sits straight up in bed

947
00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 4: and she goes, stop trying.

948
00:47:05,880 --> 00:47:10,800
Speaker 3: To make my friends relevant and then lays back down.

949
00:47:11,600 --> 00:47:14,440
Speaker 3: What so she sat up that up.

950
00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:18,880
Speaker 4: Like paranormal activity scared Jesus out of me. And I'm like, whoa,

951
00:47:19,160 --> 00:47:22,200
Speaker 4: stop trying to make my friends relevant. But screamed it

952
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:25,320
Speaker 4: slowly and like whatever that's called staccato or whatever.

953
00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:29,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I just go okay. She just goes back

954
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:29,560
Speaker 3: to sleep.

955
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:32,440
Speaker 4: So the board, I go like, so you slow punched

956
00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 4: me in your sleep and then you yelled stop trying

957
00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:37,719
Speaker 4: to make your friends relevant, and she goes, really, she goes,

958
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:39,680
Speaker 4: I was dreaming about my friends. I was like, were

959
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:41,560
Speaker 4: we fighting in your dream? She goes, I don't think so.

960
00:47:42,400 --> 00:47:44,560
Speaker 4: To this day, it's the weirdest thing that's ever happened

961
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 4: to me in bed. And that's saying something, but yeah,

962
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,360
Speaker 4: it always cracks me up. I haven't seen her in

963
00:47:50,400 --> 00:47:52,359
Speaker 4: ten years either, but I one time I did text

964
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:54,600
Speaker 4: her that. She's like, that's so funny. I still have

965
00:47:54,680 --> 00:47:56,000
Speaker 4: no idea what I was dreaming.

966
00:47:56,480 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's so funny. And I can't wait

967
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 2: after this is over to find out which.

968
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:05,279
Speaker 4: One it what Oh yeah, oh yeah, I got one

969
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:06,160
Speaker 4: for you.

970
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:08,719
Speaker 3: Give it to me. We're ready to wrap it up

971
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:10,360
Speaker 3: to you. This is a good one to go out on.

972
00:48:10,560 --> 00:48:11,160
Speaker 3: This is fun.

973
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:13,080
Speaker 4: I think I found this one and this is an

974
00:48:13,080 --> 00:48:15,200
Speaker 4: oldie but a goodie, and I think we should we

975
00:48:15,239 --> 00:48:18,600
Speaker 4: should burn it. This is from ab Oh no, I'm sorry,

976
00:48:18,760 --> 00:48:21,719
Speaker 4: I take that back. It's from Kitchen Lady Christa. I

977
00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:24,720
Speaker 4: had it saved somewhere else. Thank you, Kitchie, Lady Christa.

978
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:28,360
Speaker 4: I hope you still listen to the podcast. It's been months.

979
00:48:29,640 --> 00:48:33,239
Speaker 4: Cats have been put out by their owners being home

980
00:48:33,320 --> 00:48:35,960
Speaker 4: more during lockdown. Recent study fines.

981
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:38,680
Speaker 1: So this was give me, give it to give it

982
00:48:38,719 --> 00:48:39,160
Speaker 1: to me again.

983
00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 4: Cats have been quote put out by their owners being

984
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:45,840
Speaker 4: home more during lockdown.

985
00:48:46,560 --> 00:48:47,160
Speaker 3: Cats out.

986
00:48:49,080 --> 00:48:53,239
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, So ABC Far North, which is a thing

987
00:48:54,239 --> 00:48:57,759
Speaker 4: ABC Far North called ABC Far North. Is it from Alaska?

988
00:48:57,960 --> 00:49:01,839
Speaker 3: I think it's from England podcast in Australia.

989
00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 1: It must be the UK because using put out that way,

990
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,200
Speaker 1: especially when you're referring to a cat who could be

991
00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:09,320
Speaker 1: put out of the house.

992
00:49:09,600 --> 00:49:14,880
Speaker 4: Yes, very common, very common. Here a trope of animated

993
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:17,040
Speaker 4: TV series put the cat outside.

994
00:49:17,080 --> 00:49:18,919
Speaker 3: He makes a face. We all laugh.

995
00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:23,279
Speaker 4: Written by Jemima Burt and Adam Steven the best of

996
00:49:23,360 --> 00:49:24,880
Speaker 4: the freaking business.

997
00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:26,440
Speaker 1: God damn, those are good names.

998
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:31,279
Speaker 4: Jim Jemima Burt Adam Steven for ABC Far North that

999
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:34,880
Speaker 4: that duo, that team simply the best in the bisks.

1000
00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:36,879
Speaker 2: I think while we read this, we're gonna find out

1001
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:39,000
Speaker 2: why there couldn't have just been one author.

1002
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:42,720
Speaker 3: We're gonna hear why this was a tag team effort.

1003
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:48,200
Speaker 4: Okay, about one respondents who owned dogs reported their pets

1004
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:51,359
Speaker 4: were extremely happy to see them every day, but only

1005
00:49:51,400 --> 00:49:54,240
Speaker 4: about half of cat owners felt that was the case.

1006
00:49:55,560 --> 00:49:58,200
Speaker 4: If you suspected your feline friend was giving you the

1007
00:49:58,239 --> 00:50:01,120
Speaker 4: cold shoulder during I'm gonna call the Great car they

1008
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:03,800
Speaker 4: had the pandemic, you are not alone. A new study

1009
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:07,160
Speaker 4: by James Cook University has found that half of cat

1010
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:11,279
Speaker 4: owners reported feeling their cats were quote put out end

1011
00:50:11,360 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 4: quote by their increased presence during the Great char The

1012
00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:19,239
Speaker 4: study surveyed four hundred people living alone during lockdown and

1013
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:24,440
Speaker 4: looked into their pet ownership interactions with reports of levels

1014
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:29,000
Speaker 4: of mindfulness, depression, and anxiety. It found simply having a

1015
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:32,160
Speaker 4: dog was enough to improve owner's moods, but cats did

1016
00:50:32,200 --> 00:50:36,240
Speaker 4: not necessarily mirror their owner's affections.

1017
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:38,800
Speaker 3: So so wait did it?

1018
00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:38,960
Speaker 4: Wait?

1019
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:39,120
Speaker 3: Wait?

1020
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,400
Speaker 1: Wait so wait? Having a dog was enough to improve

1021
00:50:41,440 --> 00:50:41,839
Speaker 1: your mood?

1022
00:50:41,920 --> 00:50:44,520
Speaker 3: Yes, that did make you happy. Was having a cat

1023
00:50:44,640 --> 00:50:46,279
Speaker 3: enough to improve your No, they do not.

1024
00:50:46,400 --> 00:50:50,720
Speaker 4: Mirror your affections enough to improve your happiness. The study

1025
00:50:50,800 --> 00:50:54,400
Speaker 4: was led by lecturer doctor Jessca Olive, who said Lockdown

1026
00:50:54,520 --> 00:50:56,600
Speaker 4: was one of the first times pet owners had the

1027
00:50:56,719 --> 00:50:59,359
Speaker 4: chance to fully experience what a day in the life

1028
00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:03,040
Speaker 4: of their pet was. Like, that's interesting. I mean, Zelda

1029
00:51:03,120 --> 00:51:06,120
Speaker 4: must have had some some weird vibes having the whole

1030
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:07,160
Speaker 4: fame around.

1031
00:51:07,480 --> 00:51:08,480
Speaker 3: Now she was.

1032
00:51:08,560 --> 00:51:10,320
Speaker 1: I mean, like, because you know we're all we're artists.

1033
00:51:10,480 --> 00:51:12,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, we work at home, sow, you're artists.

1034
00:51:12,640 --> 00:51:15,200
Speaker 2: That she's just like the most spoiled dog in the

1035
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:17,319
Speaker 2: world because she just we're always here with her.

1036
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:20,480
Speaker 4: According to doctor Oliver, quote, our pets usually live in

1037
00:51:20,560 --> 00:51:24,160
Speaker 4: luxurious conditions. They have warm beds, they have toys for entertainment, jackets,

1038
00:51:24,320 --> 00:51:27,480
Speaker 4: some have jackets for winter. But they do lack certain

1039
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:30,120
Speaker 4: freedoms that we lost during lockdown. Freedom to come and

1040
00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:33,360
Speaker 4: go as they please, freedom to socialize, freedom to exercise

1041
00:51:33,920 --> 00:51:36,440
Speaker 4: is restricted now to about an hour a day.

1042
00:51:36,520 --> 00:51:36,839
Speaker 3: She said.

1043
00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 4: Dog owners surveyed reported feeling reduced levels of loneliness. Quote

1044
00:51:42,080 --> 00:51:44,440
Speaker 4: a dog was an excuse for people to go outside

1045
00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:48,200
Speaker 4: and exercise and provided that and provided a routine, and

1046
00:51:48,400 --> 00:51:52,040
Speaker 4: was also affording them opportunities to socialize with other dog

1047
00:51:52,080 --> 00:51:53,080
Speaker 4: owners doing the same thing.

1048
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:55,720
Speaker 3: Quote. We do not see this in cats.

1049
00:51:57,560 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 4: Doctor oli Us said that almost all we got responses

1050
00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:03,080
Speaker 4: that cats were put out by their owners being home

1051
00:52:03,120 --> 00:52:05,560
Speaker 4: all day and invading their space. About fifty percent of

1052
00:52:05,560 --> 00:52:07,719
Speaker 4: cat owners reported their cats were behaving in ways that

1053
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:11,560
Speaker 4: were interpreted as being offended by their owners all the time.

1054
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:14,280
Speaker 3: I mean, that is so funny.

1055
00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:16,360
Speaker 1: This really does sound like a joke article.

1056
00:52:16,560 --> 00:52:19,440
Speaker 4: Whereas I know there's two people that had to report this.

1057
00:52:19,480 --> 00:52:21,399
Speaker 4: Where is almost one hundred percent of dog owners Bob

1058
00:52:21,440 --> 00:52:23,399
Speaker 4: Well already said it. So yes, fifty percent of cats

1059
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:27,160
Speaker 4: hated your guts, but that kind of makes sense. One

1060
00:52:27,200 --> 00:52:30,560
Speaker 4: hundred percent of dog owners were happier. So on this podcast,

1061
00:52:30,840 --> 00:52:34,560
Speaker 4: we're animal people. We like we like have one of each,

1062
00:52:34,680 --> 00:52:36,960
Speaker 4: have five of each, just feed them and love them

1063
00:52:36,960 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 4: and take care of them. The reason I wanted to

1064
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,200
Speaker 4: go back and do this is because I think when

1065
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:44,439
Speaker 4: you and I were together recently hanging it was either

1066
00:52:44,480 --> 00:52:46,400
Speaker 4: you or me or somebody else, but anybody. We were

1067
00:52:46,440 --> 00:52:50,600
Speaker 4: talking about pitching TV shows for those who've never done this,

1068
00:52:50,719 --> 00:52:53,280
Speaker 4: which I would guess as most of our audience pitching TVs.

1069
00:52:53,280 --> 00:52:55,680
Speaker 3: So it's a sales pitch. You go into a room.

1070
00:52:55,760 --> 00:52:59,360
Speaker 4: Sometimes you're a conference table across from television network executives.

1071
00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:01,880
Speaker 4: Sometimes you're in the office of the main executive, sitting

1072
00:53:01,920 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 4: on a sofa or a love seat.

1073
00:53:03,880 --> 00:53:04,800
Speaker 3: Or a couple of chairs.

1074
00:53:05,160 --> 00:53:08,920
Speaker 4: But basically you have about ten to fifteen minutes to

1075
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:11,799
Speaker 4: tell them who you are, why you came up with

1076
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:13,640
Speaker 4: this idea, and why you know what it is, and

1077
00:53:13,680 --> 00:53:16,720
Speaker 4: then you tell them the show title, what it's about,

1078
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:19,000
Speaker 4: what's going to happen weekend in week out, I mean,

1079
00:53:19,120 --> 00:53:21,240
Speaker 4: character is a story, or if it's a reality show,

1080
00:53:21,600 --> 00:53:25,120
Speaker 4: you go, hey, it's called how Old am I? And

1081
00:53:25,280 --> 00:53:27,160
Speaker 4: you go we march out old people and you try

1082
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:28,600
Speaker 4: to guess how old they are, you know, like you

1083
00:53:28,760 --> 00:53:31,800
Speaker 4: just kind of walk them through the process. So at

1084
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:34,719
Speaker 4: my first pitch meeting ever was with Comedy Central, and

1085
00:53:34,800 --> 00:53:37,280
Speaker 4: I remember vividly because it was the day that bubble

1086
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:40,400
Speaker 4: Boy happened. Our balloon boy, the guy that said his

1087
00:53:40,480 --> 00:53:42,840
Speaker 4: son was in the hot air balloon that flew away

1088
00:53:42,920 --> 00:53:45,279
Speaker 4: or the weather balloon. So that so the pitch went

1089
00:53:45,719 --> 00:53:48,360
Speaker 4: really well because we just laughed about it being fake

1090
00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:51,720
Speaker 4: and the person did not buy it. At Comedy Central.

1091
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:58,160
Speaker 4: My second pitch was with MTV, and I had only

1092
00:53:58,200 --> 00:54:01,120
Speaker 4: worked for MTV. I had one TV it, so I

1093
00:54:01,200 --> 00:54:03,600
Speaker 4: was nervous. I was very well prepared. I go to

1094
00:54:03,640 --> 00:54:07,120
Speaker 4: Times Square. You remember that building, mm hmm, and seen

1095
00:54:07,239 --> 00:54:11,600
Speaker 4: fifteen Broadway, fifteen fifteen Broadway and many many times working

1096
00:54:11,640 --> 00:54:14,280
Speaker 4: out of there. And so I go up to about

1097
00:54:14,280 --> 00:54:17,800
Speaker 4: the fortieth floor wherever it is, and I'm waiting, and

1098
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:19,680
Speaker 4: I'm waiting, and I get to go in and pitch

1099
00:54:19,719 --> 00:54:22,520
Speaker 4: to somebody pretty high up, way higher than I should

1100
00:54:22,560 --> 00:54:24,399
Speaker 4: have been able to get in. And I walk in

1101
00:54:24,640 --> 00:54:26,880
Speaker 4: and he totally throws me his curveball and he says,

1102
00:54:27,520 --> 00:54:32,360
Speaker 4: do not pitch me celebrity pets, and do not pitch

1103
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:33,920
Speaker 4: me comedians cooking food.

1104
00:54:36,600 --> 00:54:40,279
Speaker 3: I was pitching neither, which is good. I was, Oh,

1105
00:54:40,280 --> 00:54:43,120
Speaker 3: my god, imagine if you were pitching those things. Yes, exactly.

1106
00:54:43,160 --> 00:54:45,359
Speaker 4: And I think it's because every comedian that we knew

1107
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:47,560
Speaker 4: in New York was going in and being like, it's me,

1108
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:49,920
Speaker 4: it's a cook it's an Emerald, but it's two comedians

1109
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:52,000
Speaker 4: and we're not good at it, which has been pitched

1110
00:54:52,120 --> 00:54:56,120
Speaker 4: ten thousand times and I think only nailed it is

1111
00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:59,719
Speaker 4: the only thing that's ever gone even remotely well. H

1112
00:55:00,280 --> 00:55:03,399
Speaker 4: So I'm trying to be cool casual, and I go,

1113
00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:06,840
Speaker 4: why not celebrity pets? And he goes, I'll tell you

1114
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:10,319
Speaker 4: why not fucking celebrity pets? Also the guy wearing the

1115
00:55:10,360 --> 00:55:13,200
Speaker 4: guy I was pitching too, you've used to know him.

1116
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:15,080
Speaker 4: I won't mention his name is no longer there anymore,

1117
00:55:15,080 --> 00:55:20,320
Speaker 4: but he was a very dapper dresser. He dressed extremely well,

1118
00:55:20,360 --> 00:55:22,279
Speaker 4: like just high end. I think he was in like

1119
00:55:22,360 --> 00:55:24,880
Speaker 4: seersucker pants and his like seersucker suit. But he was

1120
00:55:24,920 --> 00:55:26,200
Speaker 4: like all Brooks brothers had to time.

1121
00:55:26,239 --> 00:55:28,000
Speaker 3: I think I know who we're talking about. Why not

1122
00:55:28,719 --> 00:55:30,240
Speaker 3: celebrity pets? Just curious?

1123
00:55:30,280 --> 00:55:33,680
Speaker 4: He goes, oh, I'll tell you why because two hours

1124
00:55:33,719 --> 00:55:36,360
Speaker 4: ago I just had to buy a pitch from Mariah

1125
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:39,680
Speaker 4: Carey and I go, really, She goes, yeah, Mariah Carey,

1126
00:55:39,719 --> 00:55:41,840
Speaker 4: it's like the least funny person you'll ever meet in

1127
00:55:41,920 --> 00:55:43,839
Speaker 4: your life. I go, well, would you have to buy?

1128
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:47,440
Speaker 4: He goes, well, we just bought a one million dollar pilot.

1129
00:55:47,680 --> 00:55:50,239
Speaker 4: That was Mariah Carey said, I want to do a

1130
00:55:50,320 --> 00:55:52,920
Speaker 4: show from the point of view of my dogs. I

1131
00:55:52,960 --> 00:55:55,640
Speaker 4: want them to wear little cameras around their collars and

1132
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:58,400
Speaker 4: then we voice over them walking around my you know,

1133
00:55:58,520 --> 00:56:01,600
Speaker 4: four story pen house, famous MTV cribs where she gets

1134
00:56:01,600 --> 00:56:03,840
Speaker 4: in the tub wearing only like a little came or whatever.

1135
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:06,799
Speaker 4: And he goes, and because it's Mariah fucking carry, I

1136
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:09,800
Speaker 4: had to buy a show about cameras on her dogs

1137
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:14,759
Speaker 4: from the dog's perspective, which is amazing, and so I

1138
00:56:14,760 --> 00:56:16,520
Speaker 4: don't know, we ended up selling a show and then

1139
00:56:16,560 --> 00:56:18,839
Speaker 4: we ended up working on money from strangers, and so

1140
00:56:18,920 --> 00:56:22,120
Speaker 4: I ran into that SVP again, that senior vice president again,

1141
00:56:22,320 --> 00:56:24,360
Speaker 4: and I go, whatever happened? He goes, Oh, we shot

1142
00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:27,320
Speaker 4: it and it's mostly the bottom of the dog's mouths

1143
00:56:27,320 --> 00:56:30,960
Speaker 4: and head and then just cameras jostling around like it's

1144
00:56:31,000 --> 00:56:34,000
Speaker 4: on a roller coaster. It's the least usable, and then

1145
00:56:34,120 --> 00:56:36,799
Speaker 4: just celebrity feet. It's like, I mean, I guess if

1146
00:56:36,800 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 4: there's a foot fetish, a channel would be great, but

1147
00:56:39,640 --> 00:56:41,920
Speaker 4: it was like it was literally nothing, and we paid

1148
00:56:42,200 --> 00:56:44,680
Speaker 4: one million dollars for it.

1149
00:56:45,120 --> 00:56:47,320
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's amazing.

1150
00:56:47,640 --> 00:56:51,560
Speaker 4: So if you're an aspiring TV writer, producer, director, actor

1151
00:56:51,560 --> 00:56:54,120
Speaker 4: and you get a chance to pitch, just whatever you do,

1152
00:56:54,120 --> 00:56:59,279
Speaker 4: don't follow in Mariah Carey's footsteps. Don't put cameras on

1153
00:56:59,360 --> 00:57:01,560
Speaker 4: dog collar it when you're uber rich and you think

1154
00:57:01,600 --> 00:57:04,160
Speaker 4: that's somehow interesting. And for those of you out there

1155
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:07,319
Speaker 4: that think I would watch that show, you wouldn't if

1156
00:57:07,320 --> 00:57:10,560
Speaker 4: you probably saw the camera footage, which is just got awful.

1157
00:57:12,640 --> 00:57:15,440
Speaker 1: Oh man, I've never heard that story before. That was wonderful.

1158
00:57:15,480 --> 00:57:19,240
Speaker 4: Well we did it, Scottie, we did it another bananas.

1159
00:57:19,880 --> 00:57:23,320
Speaker 4: Hang it from hang it from the rafters. Oh yeah,

1160
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:23,960
Speaker 4: I agree.

1161
00:57:24,160 --> 00:57:25,120
Speaker 1: That means it was good.

1162
00:57:25,480 --> 00:57:28,479
Speaker 4: Yeah, And thank you Katie Levine. Thank you in turn,

1163
00:57:28,720 --> 00:57:31,160
Speaker 4: Lisa Maggott, and thank you to exactly right and our

1164
00:57:31,280 --> 00:57:35,200
Speaker 4: very benevolent overlord's Karen kil Garef and Georgia hart Stark

1165
00:57:35,240 --> 00:57:37,480
Speaker 4: whuld We we just love them so much.

1166
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:39,919
Speaker 1: Thank you guys, and thank you to everyone out there.

1167
00:57:40,040 --> 00:57:43,840
Speaker 2: Go to the Bananas Podcast on Instagram and send us

1168
00:57:43,840 --> 00:57:46,680
Speaker 2: some strange news, Send us a strange news, send us

1169
00:57:46,680 --> 00:57:47,919
Speaker 2: a strange story from your life.

1170
00:57:47,920 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 1: We'll do it on a minisod. You got that right,

1171
00:57:50,440 --> 00:57:53,600
Speaker 1: and you know rate and review why not it matters.

1172
00:57:53,640 --> 00:57:57,440
Speaker 2: Go to rate bananas dot com, r a te bananas

1173
00:57:57,480 --> 00:57:59,400
Speaker 2: dot com and it'll take you right there.

1174
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:07,320
Speaker 3: That's beautiful, bank Bink bananas.

1175
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:08,040
Speaker 1: Me.

1176
00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:19,640
Speaker 3: This has been an exactly right production.

1177
00:58:19,400 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 1: Produced and engineered by Katie Levine.

1178
00:58:21,560 --> 00:58:24,280
Speaker 3: The music by Kahan, and all of our artwork is

1179
00:58:24,320 --> 00:58:25,480
Speaker 3: done by Travis Millard.

1180
00:58:25,680 --> 00:58:28,400
Speaker 4: You can follow us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast,

1181
00:58:28,400 --> 00:58:30,600
Speaker 4: where we post stories every day and things that we

1182
00:58:30,640 --> 00:58:32,080
Speaker 4: don't cover on the podcast.

1183
00:58:32,480 --> 00:58:35,720
Speaker 2: Listen, subscribe, and please leave us a review on Apple podcast,

1184
00:58:35,760 --> 00:58:37,680
Speaker 2: Stitcher or wherever you get your podcast.

1185
00:58:38,000 --> 00:58:41,080
Speaker 4: And if you're interested in advertising on bananas, please email

1186
00:58:41,160 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 4: us at the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. That's

1187
00:58:44,200 --> 00:58:55,480
Speaker 4: the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com.

1188
00:58:55,520 --> 00:58:57,960
Speaker 2: By