1
00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,000
Speaker 1: It sounds so hard to because you seem you seem

2
00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:04,680
Speaker 1: like you're just right in the middle of the fire.

3
00:00:04,720 --> 00:00:06,800
Speaker 1: How am I ever gonna get out of this? How

4
00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:08,799
Speaker 1: am I gonna look back and go? I was refined

5
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:26,680
Speaker 1: by this this pain. But you will you will. Hey, everybody,

6
00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:29,680
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Granger Smith Podcast. This is episode one

7
00:00:29,760 --> 00:00:33,000
Speaker 1: hundred and sixteen. Thank you for listening, Thanks for watching.

8
00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:36,320
Speaker 1: Wherever you are. You know, Spotify now has video. You

9
00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:38,560
Speaker 1: can go and listen to the podcast and actually see

10
00:00:38,600 --> 00:00:41,559
Speaker 1: the video right there on your Spotify app, which is awesome.

11
00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,720
Speaker 1: You could watch me on YouTube, Apple podcast app, and

12
00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:48,560
Speaker 1: anywhere else that you can listen to podcasts. That's where

13
00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:50,720
Speaker 1: you're gonna find this one. Thank you to the longtime

14
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:53,680
Speaker 1: listeners and what's up to the brand new listeners. Maybe

15
00:00:53,680 --> 00:00:56,520
Speaker 1: you came from TikTok. I've been putting up a lot

16
00:00:56,520 --> 00:00:59,560
Speaker 1: of these little clips from these videos. Ian, the guy

17
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,120
Speaker 1: that edis this what shout out to Ian? He's crushing it.

18
00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:04,959
Speaker 1: And Ian will make these clips and then I'll put

19
00:01:04,959 --> 00:01:07,520
Speaker 1: it to music and put it on TikTok or Instagram reels.

20
00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:10,720
Speaker 1: So some people come from that. Some people come from

21
00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:13,480
Speaker 1: that TikTok that I put on Twitter. So however you

22
00:01:13,600 --> 00:01:17,600
Speaker 1: got here, however you found out about this podcast, I'm

23
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:21,080
Speaker 1: just grateful. I love this platform, I love the long

24
00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:23,440
Speaker 1: term form of it. And what we do here on

25
00:01:23,480 --> 00:01:28,480
Speaker 1: this podcast is I answer your questions. You email Granger

26
00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:33,240
Speaker 1: Smith Podcast at gmail dot com. It could be anything

27
00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:36,800
Speaker 1: about any subject. It could be about music, it could

28
00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,800
Speaker 1: be about career, it could be about relationships. It could

29
00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:44,600
Speaker 1: be about grief and loss or or finances, really anything,

30
00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:47,640
Speaker 1: and I've seen anything and everything. Email me. Put a

31
00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:50,680
Speaker 1: good subject line, make it readable, you know, like, don't

32
00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:53,320
Speaker 1: make it ten pages long. And tell me your name

33
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:55,720
Speaker 1: unless you want to be anonymous, and tell me where

34
00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:57,120
Speaker 1: you're from so I can get it kind of an

35
00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:02,080
Speaker 1: idea of who I'm talking to. And I love I

36
00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:04,720
Speaker 1: love digging into these I have so much going on

37
00:02:04,760 --> 00:02:08,280
Speaker 1: in my life and brand new radio show starting January. First,

38
00:02:08,280 --> 00:02:11,000
Speaker 1: you're gonna hear me on a show called After Midnight,

39
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:14,640
Speaker 1: nationally syndicated show, and so you're gonna hear me from

40
00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:18,440
Speaker 1: midnight to six am probably in most places in the country.

41
00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:21,120
Speaker 1: You'll be able to find this on FM radio. And

42
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,680
Speaker 1: then I have the smiths Our YouTube channel, our family vlog.

43
00:02:25,040 --> 00:02:29,400
Speaker 1: And then of course, I have music, touring, songwriting, recording,

44
00:02:30,120 --> 00:02:32,720
Speaker 1: and I'm working on a couple other things that are

45
00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:34,320
Speaker 1: kind of a secret that I can't say yet, but

46
00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:36,920
Speaker 1: they're really big, and one of them, one of those

47
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:40,919
Speaker 1: reasons is why I look like I've forgotten my razor

48
00:02:40,960 --> 00:02:42,840
Speaker 1: and I'm just completely free out to shave in a

49
00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:46,000
Speaker 1: long time. That is all coming soon. I'm gonna I'm

50
00:02:46,000 --> 00:02:49,320
Speaker 1: gonna explain all this soon. I'm by myself, no guest today.

51
00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:53,800
Speaker 1: During the holiday season. It's just more difficult to coordinate

52
00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:56,760
Speaker 1: on my end having someone come and picking a time,

53
00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:59,720
Speaker 1: because it really ends up this podcast ends up being

54
00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,560
Speaker 1: something where it's like, you know what I got some time,

55
00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:05,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna run up to my studio and record a podcast,

56
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:08,160
Speaker 1: and I literally pull up these emails that you guys sent,

57
00:03:08,560 --> 00:03:12,480
Speaker 1: and I just start going through without really referencing, without studying.

58
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:14,680
Speaker 1: I don't have notes in front of me. I don't

59
00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:17,200
Speaker 1: have like a list of really cool quotes. I kind

60
00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:19,040
Speaker 1: of wish I did. Sometimes I wish I could be

61
00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:22,400
Speaker 1: like Boom just to hashtag some just crazy quote that

62
00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:25,320
Speaker 1: you know, rocks the world. I don't have that, so

63
00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:27,560
Speaker 1: it's just it's all off the top. Of my head,

64
00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:29,920
Speaker 1: and it's it's in a form that I like to

65
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,800
Speaker 1: think of in terms of We're sitting around a campfire

66
00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:35,360
Speaker 1: and you know, it's getting late and the fire is

67
00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:38,480
Speaker 1: burning down, and I'm sitting in an adirondyke chair and

68
00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:42,480
Speaker 1: someone walks up and goes, hey, man, while we're sitting here,

69
00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:45,360
Speaker 1: could I run something by you? And we just talked

70
00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:48,120
Speaker 1: through it, you know, as if I'm just we're just

71
00:03:48,200 --> 00:03:52,320
Speaker 1: old friends talking about something in their life. That's what

72
00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:56,640
Speaker 1: this is. Because of that, I'm not going to be

73
00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:58,839
Speaker 1: right all of the time. You're gonna have to take

74
00:03:58,920 --> 00:04:01,640
Speaker 1: all of these answers with a grain of salt as

75
00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:03,880
Speaker 1: if we're just friends. Sometimes, for instance, I'll see on

76
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,839
Speaker 1: TikTok one of these things go up, and I'll see

77
00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:09,200
Speaker 1: some people that really like it, well a clip from

78
00:04:09,240 --> 00:04:13,080
Speaker 1: the podcast, and then there's always people that go disagree,

79
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:16,760
Speaker 1: this is totally wrong. Hey, great, that's your opinion if

80
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:20,480
Speaker 1: you had a podcast, and you would probably answer it

81
00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,040
Speaker 1: a different way. And I'm totally cool with that. That's

82
00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,680
Speaker 1: just what we do around here, and thank you guys

83
00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:28,360
Speaker 1: for listening. I want to dive in the only one

84
00:04:28,400 --> 00:04:30,680
Speaker 1: that I've seen that I'm going to read today is

85
00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:34,600
Speaker 1: the first one because I like to start with something

86
00:04:34,640 --> 00:04:37,920
Speaker 1: a little bit lighter, so I don't just dive in

87
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:40,599
Speaker 1: and accidentally jump into an email that's super heavy. And

88
00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:44,279
Speaker 1: that's how we start. So this first one, the subject

89
00:04:44,279 --> 00:04:50,039
Speaker 1: line is message on YouTube Really you question Mark says, Hey, Granger,

90
00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:52,360
Speaker 1: I got a notification from a comment I made on

91
00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:55,800
Speaker 1: YouTube of one of your YouTube videos. It appears to

92
00:04:55,839 --> 00:04:58,880
Speaker 1: be from you, but it seems unrealistic. Just checking to

93
00:04:58,880 --> 00:05:02,120
Speaker 1: see if it's spam or not. If it is, I

94
00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:04,960
Speaker 1: love the Smiths, your concert in Maine, and your podcast

95
00:05:05,080 --> 00:05:10,000
Speaker 1: so inspirational. This comes from Sherry and Wales' Maine. Sherry, great,

96
00:05:10,120 --> 00:05:13,080
Speaker 1: great question, and I love I love that you asked

97
00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:16,839
Speaker 1: this because it's very important. In fact, many many many

98
00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:21,320
Speaker 1: episodes ago, I did an entire podcast on this subject

99
00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:24,240
Speaker 1: with a lot of research that I put in. There

100
00:05:24,279 --> 00:05:27,599
Speaker 1: is so much spam. The short answer to you, Sherry,

101
00:05:27,680 --> 00:05:30,520
Speaker 1: is no, it was not me. If it was me,

102
00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:35,000
Speaker 1: there would be a blue check next to my name. Right,

103
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:37,359
Speaker 1: So it's going to say everything I'm on in social media,

104
00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:42,719
Speaker 1: everything that says Granger Smith that's me has a blue check.

105
00:05:43,120 --> 00:05:45,280
Speaker 1: You have to look. And this is the same with

106
00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:51,080
Speaker 1: any any influencer or celebrity, anyone with a lot of

107
00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:56,240
Speaker 1: followers that has some kind of platform, almost all of

108
00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:59,120
Speaker 1: them are verified and that's the blue check. So you

109
00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:00,880
Speaker 1: need to look for the blue check because there's so

110
00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:05,840
Speaker 1: much spam and it usually comes from Nigeria and they

111
00:06:05,880 --> 00:06:10,000
Speaker 1: are getting more and more creative and it's it's crazy.

112
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,080
Speaker 1: As I did the research for the for the podcast

113
00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:15,160
Speaker 1: that I talked about all this, there is there are

114
00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:20,160
Speaker 1: literally factories in Nigeria where people come into work just

115
00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:22,640
Speaker 1: like anyone else works, and they walk in and they

116
00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:24,839
Speaker 1: sit in front of a computer that's provided for them

117
00:06:24,880 --> 00:06:29,320
Speaker 1: in the factory and their job literally is to create

118
00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:35,920
Speaker 1: accounts based on American influencers and try to comment or

119
00:06:36,000 --> 00:06:41,600
Speaker 1: direct message people. And what they're doing, they're always after something.

120
00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,400
Speaker 1: So they might start it as thank you for being

121
00:06:45,480 --> 00:06:47,840
Speaker 1: a big fan, I love you so much. They're trying

122
00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:49,840
Speaker 1: to open the conversation, but it's always going to end

123
00:06:49,920 --> 00:06:54,040
Speaker 1: up being something like I created this account because my man.

124
00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,120
Speaker 1: I didn't want my manager to know about it, or

125
00:06:56,279 --> 00:06:58,520
Speaker 1: my record label or my wife to know about it.

126
00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:01,360
Speaker 1: So I created this person account so that I can

127
00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:04,960
Speaker 1: interact with my fans personally, it's all a lie. And

128
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,400
Speaker 1: then they're going to get you to eventually get off

129
00:07:07,440 --> 00:07:10,000
Speaker 1: of that social media account and go to an email

130
00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:13,680
Speaker 1: or go to a direct message, where then they're going

131
00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:17,600
Speaker 1: to talk about financial problems that they're having and can

132
00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:21,600
Speaker 1: you send them a iTunes gift card or an Amazon

133
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:25,520
Speaker 1: gift card or some kind of digital gift card. It's

134
00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:29,760
Speaker 1: always that. The worst part is that a lot of

135
00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:33,320
Speaker 1: times they're targeting charities and so they they'll act like

136
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:37,080
Speaker 1: they're a charity and that they're looking around the holiday

137
00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:39,640
Speaker 1: season to build up so that they can give to

138
00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:42,280
Speaker 1: the homeless or some you know, some kind of great cause,

139
00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:45,640
Speaker 1: and it's like all I need is twenty five dollars

140
00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:47,440
Speaker 1: gift card and we're going to give it to this

141
00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:52,720
Speaker 1: great cause. It's it's all a lie. And unfortunately, the

142
00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:56,520
Speaker 1: reason that there's factories in Nigeria is because so many

143
00:07:56,600 --> 00:08:00,560
Speaker 1: people fall for it and so many people fall victim

144
00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:05,840
Speaker 1: to it. And it's a tough situation because the kids

145
00:08:05,880 --> 00:08:08,280
Speaker 1: that are doing this in Nigeria and they're all like

146
00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:13,360
Speaker 1: twenty twenty one years old, they're not inherently more flawed

147
00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:16,840
Speaker 1: than you or I. They are doing all they know

148
00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:19,760
Speaker 1: how to do. They're getting there's not much. There's not

149
00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:22,720
Speaker 1: very many jobs, and so they get recruited on the

150
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:26,240
Speaker 1: street and they come and they get an hourly wage.

151
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:30,280
Speaker 1: And it's not like it's one person just spamming the world.

152
00:08:30,480 --> 00:08:32,280
Speaker 1: They work for a boss who has a boss who

153
00:08:32,280 --> 00:08:35,120
Speaker 1: has a boss, and so they're coming into work and

154
00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:37,880
Speaker 1: they don't really see the problem in it because they're

155
00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:40,400
Speaker 1: so disconnected from it. They just do what they're told

156
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:43,800
Speaker 1: to do. So I can't really blame them as much

157
00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:47,480
Speaker 1: as we blame the system. But that being said, what

158
00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:50,439
Speaker 1: we need to learn as listeners and as social media

159
00:08:50,520 --> 00:08:55,320
Speaker 1: followers is how to navigate the dark alleys of social media.

160
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:59,000
Speaker 1: And what I mean by that is when we know

161
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:04,679
Speaker 1: as humans, because of so many years of walking walking

162
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:09,040
Speaker 1: down streets and dark alleys, we know where not to go.

163
00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:12,839
Speaker 1: Like we know that if you're in New York City

164
00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:16,360
Speaker 1: in the hood at night, you're not just gonna walk

165
00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:19,320
Speaker 1: by yourself and go through some buildings where the dumpsters

166
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,120
Speaker 1: are and go down the dark alleys at three o'clock

167
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:24,520
Speaker 1: in the morning. You wouldn't do that because you don't

168
00:09:24,520 --> 00:09:28,120
Speaker 1: know what you're gonna find there. But we haven't quite

169
00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:31,280
Speaker 1: learned that on social media. I believe that we will.

170
00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:33,360
Speaker 1: I believe we're going to get better and better and

171
00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:36,000
Speaker 1: our kids are going to be way better than our adults.

172
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:39,400
Speaker 1: And our grandmothers are in deep trouble when it comes

173
00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:41,160
Speaker 1: to this because they have no idea. So we need

174
00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:44,719
Speaker 1: to protect our aunts and uncles and parents and grandparents

175
00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:48,080
Speaker 1: as they're on Facebook and they're seeing these because they're

176
00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:51,160
Speaker 1: not as trained like some of the younger people are

177
00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:54,720
Speaker 1: to go, that's fake. I know that that's a parody account.

178
00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:59,320
Speaker 1: That's false. So we need to inform everyone around us, like, hey,

179
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,840
Speaker 1: remember to look for the blue check mark. That's like

180
00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,000
Speaker 1: walking down a dark alley. If that doesn't have a

181
00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:07,560
Speaker 1: blue check and they're messaging you and it's Luke Bryan,

182
00:10:08,760 --> 00:10:11,840
Speaker 1: then it's a fake and it's a dark alley that

183
00:10:11,880 --> 00:10:15,880
Speaker 1: you shouldn't be walking down. So don't engage. Okay, Sherry,

184
00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:18,360
Speaker 1: that was not me great question and I'm glad we

185
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:25,400
Speaker 1: brought it up. Next question, subjectline says question for the podcast.

186
00:10:25,400 --> 00:10:27,800
Speaker 1: Hello Granger. I'm a huge fan of everything you do.

187
00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:31,360
Speaker 1: I'm Matthew. I'm twenty one years old and the girl

188
00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:34,920
Speaker 1: there's a girl that I really like, but she recently

189
00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:38,440
Speaker 1: went through my cell phone while I was sleeping, and

190
00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:42,160
Speaker 1: I feel like trust has been violated, and I'm lost

191
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:45,079
Speaker 1: on what I did, what I should do. Should I

192
00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:54,559
Speaker 1: stay with her? Just break it well? Twenty one? The

193
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,880
Speaker 1: first question, the first thing I would say to you, Matthew,

194
00:10:57,960 --> 00:11:02,880
Speaker 1: is that have the girl at your place while you're sleeping,

195
00:11:03,440 --> 00:11:06,439
Speaker 1: and you're twenty one years old, and you're not that

196
00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:10,280
Speaker 1: serious about her anyway, it's not going to lead to

197
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:15,120
Speaker 1: anything good. So that's a problem to begin with. You're

198
00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:18,400
Speaker 1: spending too much time with her overnight. It's too much time.

199
00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:24,480
Speaker 1: But yes, there is a problem here. You recognize this, Matthew,

200
00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:29,400
Speaker 1: that there's an underlying problem with her going through your phone.

201
00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:34,080
Speaker 1: Sometimes I could say this, if we're sitting around a campfire,

202
00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:38,240
Speaker 1: I'd say she might be cheating on you, because sometimes

203
00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:41,840
Speaker 1: people that have this huge fear of their partner cheating

204
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:45,920
Speaker 1: on them, they're going through the same thing themselves, or

205
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:49,800
Speaker 1: they're struggling with the same thing. Maybe she's talking to somebody,

206
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,559
Speaker 1: maybe not, but it's there's a chance there's a better

207
00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:55,480
Speaker 1: chance that if she's so worried about you and what's

208
00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,440
Speaker 1: in your phone, that she might be doing the same thing,

209
00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:01,880
Speaker 1: so there's a red flag. Second thing I would say

210
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:05,320
Speaker 1: is are you giving her reasons to not trust you?

211
00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:10,400
Speaker 1: And maybe you're thinking no, But from the outside looking in,

212
00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:15,080
Speaker 1: are you very flirtatious with other girls? Do you have

213
00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:17,240
Speaker 1: a wondering eye? Like does she catch you walking down

214
00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:19,600
Speaker 1: the street and you're kind of your eyes are following

215
00:12:19,760 --> 00:12:22,000
Speaker 1: a girl that's walking by? Are you that kind of person?

216
00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:25,880
Speaker 1: Has this happened before? Has she caught you in something

217
00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:29,400
Speaker 1: before that you shouldn't have been doing. All these things

218
00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:34,600
Speaker 1: lead to to this distrust that she has. My old

219
00:12:34,679 --> 00:12:40,439
Speaker 1: drummer Michael would say, she needs more hobbies, she needs

220
00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:44,959
Speaker 1: more things to do if she has enough free time

221
00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:48,680
Speaker 1: other than sleeping in the middle of the night to

222
00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:53,440
Speaker 1: pull out your phone and start going through it. Some

223
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:57,240
Speaker 1: people are probably listening thinking to themselves, Hey, me and

224
00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,520
Speaker 1: my girl, we have a great relationship and we give

225
00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:03,319
Speaker 1: each other passwords to everything, Like my girl has passwords

226
00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:06,079
Speaker 1: to my Facebook and I have passwords to hers, and

227
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:09,079
Speaker 1: we're free to go through it at any at any time.

228
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,680
Speaker 1: There's something unhealthy about that too, Like you do you

229
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:17,200
Speaker 1: give your passwords to to your girlfriend because of a

230
00:13:17,200 --> 00:13:19,680
Speaker 1: trust thing? Like you think that that's gonna build trust.

231
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:24,160
Speaker 1: There's kind of there's a problem with that, right like

232
00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:27,640
Speaker 1: that that like trust should come before giving passwords. You

233
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:31,080
Speaker 1: should just trust someone because you have no reason to

234
00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:34,520
Speaker 1: not trust them. You've never given them a reason, and

235
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:37,720
Speaker 1: the girl has never given you a reason. And to

236
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:41,079
Speaker 1: think about giving them your password is like ridiculous at

237
00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:43,520
Speaker 1: that point, It's like, that's a waste of time. You

238
00:13:43,679 --> 00:13:46,240
Speaker 1: know what you're gonna find. You're gonna find nothing. So

239
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,920
Speaker 1: all that said, Matthew, if you're thinking about should I

240
00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,959
Speaker 1: stay with her or just break it off, that's your

241
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,640
Speaker 1: that's your last question. I wou'd say break it off

242
00:13:57,160 --> 00:14:01,319
Speaker 1: because of it, regardless of of what's going on. If

243
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:06,160
Speaker 1: something so petty, it's this coming between you guys, is

244
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:09,520
Speaker 1: something that you're willing to entertain the thought of breaking

245
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:13,079
Speaker 1: up with her? Hey, man, it's not strong. There's not

246
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:17,439
Speaker 1: a strong enough bond there, Like the pieces are too separated.

247
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:20,080
Speaker 1: They're a little bit too broken for this to matter,

248
00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,600
Speaker 1: for this to last longer than her going through your phone.

249
00:14:23,960 --> 00:14:27,080
Speaker 1: So if you're thinking about it because of that, that's

250
00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:31,200
Speaker 1: a yeah, yeah, break it off. And and hey, I've

251
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:33,880
Speaker 1: been in relationships like this. Amber has two In fact,

252
00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:37,320
Speaker 1: She told me today that you know, there's been times

253
00:14:37,360 --> 00:14:40,760
Speaker 1: when when she's been in relationships just like this one,

254
00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:45,160
Speaker 1: and so sometimes it's the combination of the two people

255
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:49,000
Speaker 1: getting together and they just don't trust each other. And

256
00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:51,880
Speaker 1: the thing is, you can get in another relationship after

257
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:56,040
Speaker 1: this and there's total trust, like there's nobody going through

258
00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:59,800
Speaker 1: anybody's phone, and so it's not really the person, it's

259
00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:02,560
Speaker 1: the the combination of the two people that makes us

260
00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:11,120
Speaker 1: a bad situation. I break up with her. Next question

261
00:15:11,280 --> 00:15:17,520
Speaker 1: says subject line, how to deal with grief. Dear Granger,

262
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,960
Speaker 1: This is with a very heavy heart that I'm asking

263
00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:23,720
Speaker 1: you this question. I received the call early Sunday morning,

264
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:29,160
Speaker 1: December nineteenth, twenty twenty one from my mother that my nephew, Sean,

265
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:33,840
Speaker 1: a member of the Navy second Enlistment, had committed suicide

266
00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:37,840
Speaker 1: by gunshot wound to the head. My family is so

267
00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:41,680
Speaker 1: broken on this Christmas and I'm coming to you deeply

268
00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:44,640
Speaker 1: saddened and wondering how do you cope with this grief

269
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:48,040
Speaker 1: so I could be strong for my two children, his cousins,

270
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:53,680
Speaker 1: for my family. I'm truly lost right now. Thank you.

271
00:15:53,720 --> 00:16:01,480
Speaker 1: This is Erica from Jackson, Michigan. Erica also says she's

272
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:05,720
Speaker 1: a member of you nation. Erica, I'm so sorry that

273
00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:08,800
Speaker 1: you're going through this. Of the holiday season is a

274
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:13,400
Speaker 1: tough time for grief. It's it's the hardest time, really,

275
00:16:13,480 --> 00:16:17,200
Speaker 1: because you have birthdays of the person you lost, and

276
00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:20,360
Speaker 1: you have the holidays. These are times when you're typically

277
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:23,080
Speaker 1: with them or talking to them, and so when they're

278
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,800
Speaker 1: not there, there's a table I mean, excuse me that

279
00:16:25,960 --> 00:16:27,880
Speaker 1: when you're when you're not with them, there's a chair

280
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:32,040
Speaker 1: missing at the table of the dinner of the holiday,

281
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:35,480
Speaker 1: and and that just makes it for a tough Thanksgiving

282
00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:40,000
Speaker 1: or Christmas or ringing in the new year, are celebrating

283
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:44,680
Speaker 1: a birthday, it makes it really tough. The anniversary of

284
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:48,480
Speaker 1: the death is tough too. So these are like speed

285
00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:55,040
Speaker 1: bumps on the road to recovery of grief. The first

286
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,880
Speaker 1: one is always the hardest, The first one, the first

287
00:16:57,880 --> 00:16:59,800
Speaker 1: one of any of these, the first birthday, the first

288
00:16:59,840 --> 00:17:04,280
Speaker 1: day aniversary of the death, the first Thanksgiving, the first Christmas.

289
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:09,960
Speaker 1: It's tough. So the first step in all this, Erica,

290
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:13,720
Speaker 1: is that just recognizing that you're feeling grief and that

291
00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:19,120
Speaker 1: that sounds silly, but recognizing it and realizing that you're

292
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:23,639
Speaker 1: broken and that that someone is missing is a good, healthy,

293
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:28,439
Speaker 1: first step, as opposed to denying it or avoiding it,

294
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:33,760
Speaker 1: sweeping it under the rug. The second thing I would say, Erica,

295
00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:40,480
Speaker 1: is that whatever emotion you're feeling, whether that's that's sadness

296
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:47,439
Speaker 1: or joy or happiness or contentment, are are weeping grief,

297
00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:52,760
Speaker 1: Whatever you're feeling at the at the moment is valid

298
00:17:52,800 --> 00:17:56,199
Speaker 1: and it is right. The reason I say it that

299
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 1: way is because you might be thinking, of course I

300
00:17:58,040 --> 00:18:04,680
Speaker 1: feel sad, but five hours from now, someone could say

301
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:08,920
Speaker 1: something funny and you'll you'll instinctively laugh because it's funny.

302
00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:12,680
Speaker 1: And then right when you laugh, there's this thought that

303
00:18:12,680 --> 00:18:15,040
Speaker 1: that just comes in like a thief into your mind,

304
00:18:15,880 --> 00:18:20,480
Speaker 1: and it says your brain says you fool. How could

305
00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:23,440
Speaker 1: you laugh at a time like this. You're grieving. You're

306
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:27,200
Speaker 1: not supposed to smile, You're not supposed to to enjoy

307
00:18:27,359 --> 00:18:32,919
Speaker 1: any moment, and that's false. Whatever you're feeling in grief

308
00:18:33,000 --> 00:18:37,240
Speaker 1: is valid at the time. So don't let that grief

309
00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:41,119
Speaker 1: it's a thief, and don't let it steal the joy

310
00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:44,800
Speaker 1: that you still have, because joy cannot be erased. Happiness

311
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:47,920
Speaker 1: comes and goes it's fleeting. You know. Happiness is when

312
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,160
Speaker 1: you walk outside and the sun hits you, just perfectly

313
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,679
Speaker 1: comes out of the clouds and it just hits you

314
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:56,840
Speaker 1: and you're it's seventy degrees and it's perfect and you go,

315
00:18:57,040 --> 00:19:03,200
Speaker 1: huh happy, I'm happy. But but joy, it's not fleeting. Joy.

316
00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:06,520
Speaker 1: Joy comes from God and it's it's inherently in us,

317
00:19:06,680 --> 00:19:10,760
Speaker 1: and it's it boils out of us at any time.

318
00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:14,719
Speaker 1: Grief and joy can coexist. So I want to I

319
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:17,560
Speaker 1: want to warn you of the thief that grief is

320
00:19:17,760 --> 00:19:21,119
Speaker 1: when it wants to come in and steal that that

321
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:24,600
Speaker 1: joy or that happiness or that contentment, whatever emotion it is,

322
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:28,560
Speaker 1: it wants to steal it away from you. So so

323
00:19:28,560 --> 00:19:34,080
Speaker 1: so sit content knowing that whatever happens, whatever moment, whatever

324
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:43,280
Speaker 1: you're feeling, is right and it is okay. After that,

325
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:46,800
Speaker 1: Eric I would tell you that this is a step

326
00:19:46,840 --> 00:19:50,840
Speaker 1: by step process. There is no you know, you you'll

327
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:55,320
Speaker 1: read these these books about the different stages of grief

328
00:19:56,320 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 1: and it's technically right, but it's never in. They ordered

329
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:04,280
Speaker 1: that the book says that it's in. You could be

330
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:13,119
Speaker 1: angry followed by guilty, followed by remorseful, followed by numb.

331
00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:15,640
Speaker 1: You're right, right, you could you go through all these emotions,

332
00:20:15,640 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 1: but they change orders, and then you could be angry again.

333
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:23,040
Speaker 1: You could feel guilt, Erica, and the fact that I

334
00:20:23,040 --> 00:20:25,320
Speaker 1: should have done this with Sean. I should have said this,

335
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:27,359
Speaker 1: I should have reached out to him, and if I

336
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,159
Speaker 1: would if I only would have done this, if I

337
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:32,680
Speaker 1: would have called him or texted that I was thinking

338
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:34,560
Speaker 1: about this text and I was going to text him,

339
00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:37,199
Speaker 1: and I didn't send it, and because I didn't, he

340
00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:41,040
Speaker 1: killed himself. You're gonna you're gonna have those thoughts of guilt.

341
00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,840
Speaker 1: It's going to overcome you. Don't let it. Don't let

342
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:49,440
Speaker 1: that guilt sneak in. It's a thief. Also, you asked

343
00:20:49,440 --> 00:20:54,760
Speaker 1: about your two children, his cousins. This is this is

344
00:20:55,760 --> 00:21:01,040
Speaker 1: it's life. You don't ever want kids to go through

345
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:05,080
Speaker 1: this kind of experience, but yours are might have been

346
00:21:05,119 --> 00:21:10,120
Speaker 1: through it. And because they are going through it, you're

347
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:12,320
Speaker 1: gonna have to use this as as a teaching moment

348
00:21:13,119 --> 00:21:17,760
Speaker 1: for life that this this is terrible, and that that

349
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:21,879
Speaker 1: you're your cousin Sean. You're gonna have to explain the

350
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:25,280
Speaker 1: best depending on their age. Their age matters in this conversation.

351
00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 1: But you're gonna have to walk through this with them

352
00:21:28,680 --> 00:21:34,919
Speaker 1: and tell them truthfully and show them Erica that that

353
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:39,040
Speaker 1: it's okay to cry. And they might they might reach

354
00:21:39,080 --> 00:21:42,040
Speaker 1: moments where they're they're giggling and laughing and playing and

355
00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:47,879
Speaker 1: you're sad, and then before you know it, you're smiling

356
00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:51,040
Speaker 1: and cooking spaghetti. And then one of them gets starts

357
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 1: to get sad about Sean, and you have to immediately

358
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:57,720
Speaker 1: pivot to them and say, are you sad about your cousin?

359
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:00,000
Speaker 1: And then you hold them and you say it's okay,

360
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:04,159
Speaker 1: okay to be sad, And so you're never Families are

361
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 1: rarely on the same grief level at the same time,

362
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:10,160
Speaker 1: like we flip flop and so, and that's a good

363
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:12,480
Speaker 1: thing because if you're all sad at the same time

364
00:22:12,840 --> 00:22:17,000
Speaker 1: every day the same time, it makes it difficult. And

365
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:23,000
Speaker 1: so sympathy comes when you have someone that's down and

366
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:25,560
Speaker 1: and and they're in grief, and the grief is like

367
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:29,760
Speaker 1: a quicksand, and so this is what sympathy is. Sympathy

368
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:33,840
Speaker 1: is when someone's in quicksand and you step in the

369
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,000
Speaker 1: quicksand with them and you grab them, you grab their

370
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:39,560
Speaker 1: hand and you hold them, and you say I feel

371
00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:44,080
Speaker 1: your pain, I feel this with you. But you still

372
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:48,400
Speaker 1: have a foot, your other foot on dry land. So

373
00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:51,040
Speaker 1: you grab them, you put one foot in the quicksand

374
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,359
Speaker 1: and you take their hand and you go, I'm gonna

375
00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:56,080
Speaker 1: help you get out of this moment, out of this quicksand,

376
00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:59,199
Speaker 1: because I got a foot on dry land. And the

377
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:03,439
Speaker 1: difference between that and empathy, it's empathy is when you

378
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:06,919
Speaker 1: dive in with them, into the quicksand with them. And

379
00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:09,600
Speaker 1: so many people are so quick to be full of

380
00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:13,640
Speaker 1: empathy and say I empathize with you, And in my opinion, guys,

381
00:23:13,680 --> 00:23:17,399
Speaker 1: it's the wrong move, especially in grief, because empathy is

382
00:23:17,400 --> 00:23:20,159
Speaker 1: when you jump in the quicksand with them and you

383
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:21,840
Speaker 1: hold them and you say I feel this with you,

384
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 1: same as sympathy, but you don't have a foot on

385
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:28,000
Speaker 1: dry land. And so what happens You both sink in

386
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:33,480
Speaker 1: the quicksand and there's no way out. There's no way out.

387
00:23:34,720 --> 00:23:38,840
Speaker 1: Make sure you always have a foot on that dry land.

388
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:43,359
Speaker 1: Avoid the guilt like a plague. Get rid of that guilt.

389
00:23:44,760 --> 00:23:47,880
Speaker 1: Use it. Call it out for what it is. It's

390
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:50,159
Speaker 1: a thief and it's a liar. Say I will not

391
00:23:51,160 --> 00:23:53,280
Speaker 1: fall for this guilt. I will not fall for that

392
00:23:53,400 --> 00:23:56,720
Speaker 1: thought of that last text, that last call, what I

393
00:23:56,760 --> 00:24:01,240
Speaker 1: should have done? And lastly, once and once you've navigated this,

394
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:05,320
Speaker 1: because this step by step process, you have to take

395
00:24:05,359 --> 00:24:09,040
Speaker 1: it day by day, and then the day turns into weeks,

396
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,680
Speaker 1: and the weeks turn into months, and the months turn

397
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:14,920
Speaker 1: into years, and the years, when you add them up,

398
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:21,240
Speaker 1: will eventually you'll feel relief from that immediate grief. Right,

399
00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:25,600
Speaker 1: So ten years go by and you will not be

400
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:30,680
Speaker 1: feeling the same biting pain that you felt on ground

401
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:34,000
Speaker 1: zero day one. We could all agree to that, no

402
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 1: matter where you are, no matter what grief it is,

403
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:41,080
Speaker 1: on year ten, it's still going to hurt, but it's

404
00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:44,639
Speaker 1: not going to feel like day one. So if you're thinking,

405
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 1: and there's people listening that they're going through grief right now.

406
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 1: So I'm speaking to everyone, not just you, Erica. But

407
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,480
Speaker 1: if you're thinking, I can't. I try to go day

408
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:58,240
Speaker 1: by day, but I can't. It's too hard. So then

409
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:02,120
Speaker 1: you go hour by hour, and if hour by hour

410
00:25:02,280 --> 00:25:05,000
Speaker 1: is still too tough, then you go minute by minute.

411
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,080
Speaker 1: If minute by minutes too tough, you go second by second.

412
00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:11,480
Speaker 1: If second by second is too tough. You go heartbeat

413
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:18,440
Speaker 1: by heartbeat, breath by breath in hell exhale in hell exhale,

414
00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:22,879
Speaker 1: And the same theory with days going by the breath,

415
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:25,280
Speaker 1: the heart beats will go by and turn into seconds

416
00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:27,240
Speaker 1: and turn into minutes, and turn into hours and turn

417
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:32,639
Speaker 1: into days and weeks and months and then years. The

418
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:34,639
Speaker 1: last thing I'll say about this is that once you

419
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:39,400
Speaker 1: kind of pass, you get out of the quicksand where

420
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:44,040
Speaker 1: it still hurts because you never you never move on, okay,

421
00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:49,720
Speaker 1: you just move forward. You keep moving forward. So you

422
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,199
Speaker 1: could you could realize that that although I can't I

423
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,280
Speaker 1: will never move on from the hurt of losing Sean,

424
00:25:57,119 --> 00:26:00,480
Speaker 1: I can move forward. I can move forward. We all can.

425
00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 1: We're capable of Humans are incredible at overcoming. Look at history.

426
00:26:06,080 --> 00:26:10,960
Speaker 1: People have been through horrific things and they have the

427
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:15,640
Speaker 1: capability of moving forward. We are we are amazing creatures

428
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 1: that God made for that purpose to keep moving forward.

429
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:22,000
Speaker 1: And what I would do when you do find that

430
00:26:22,119 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 1: place is I would I would put energy into suicide relief,

431
00:26:28,359 --> 00:26:34,840
Speaker 1: suicide prevention, specifically with with military men and women. We

432
00:26:34,920 --> 00:26:38,439
Speaker 1: see this so often with military men and women. And

433
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:41,119
Speaker 1: so when you're when you're dealing with this kind of

434
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:45,280
Speaker 1: suicide with from PTSD, you could you could help with

435
00:26:45,320 --> 00:26:50,400
Speaker 1: that spreading awareness, help help financially, or you could help

436
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:54,440
Speaker 1: in counseling places or hospitals or or or some kind

437
00:26:54,440 --> 00:27:00,919
Speaker 1: of any kind of relief organization for suicide prevention. You

438
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:02,840
Speaker 1: could help, and you could put effort into that, and

439
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:07,840
Speaker 1: through that effort, through that help, you will find joy

440
00:27:07,960 --> 00:27:12,280
Speaker 1: in that. You will find a healing that's unlike any other.

441
00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:16,879
Speaker 1: Through pouring out in that way, the level of grief

442
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:20,080
Speaker 1: you have equals the love that you had. So the

443
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:22,320
Speaker 1: more you love, the more you will grieve when you

444
00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:26,520
Speaker 1: lose them. And that says something because if you didn't

445
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:28,560
Speaker 1: have them at all, you wouldn't have the grief, but

446
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:35,000
Speaker 1: you wouldn't have them, and that always having them for

447
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:38,240
Speaker 1: a short time is always better than never having them

448
00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:46,400
Speaker 1: at all. I'm gonna take a break beer right back, guys.

449
00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 1: Today's podcast is brought to you by Athletic Greens AG one,

450
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,440
Speaker 1: one of my favorite companies to read for one of

451
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,159
Speaker 1: the things that I do every single day and my

452
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 1: own personal routine is I take three scoops of AG.

453
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,200
Speaker 1: One actually used to be one scoop I moved it

454
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:05,359
Speaker 1: up to two. Now I'm putting three scoops of this

455
00:28:05,400 --> 00:28:09,000
Speaker 1: stuff in my protein shakes every single morning, seven days

456
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:14,600
Speaker 1: a week. I started eating this Athletic Greens supplement when

457
00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:16,760
Speaker 1: I first started reading for it on this podcast, and

458
00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,760
Speaker 1: I loved it so much, and I felt so good

459
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:20,920
Speaker 1: when I started taking it that I went and signed

460
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 1: up for myself and got my own subscription, and now

461
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:26,399
Speaker 1: I'm on a monthly plan with them. I pay full price,

462
00:28:26,560 --> 00:28:28,920
Speaker 1: just so you know, no discounts here. And I say

463
00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:31,720
Speaker 1: that so that you could you could know how much

464
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:35,040
Speaker 1: I really do enjoy AG one. It comes in the mail,

465
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:38,360
Speaker 1: super easy subscription. You could cancel it anytime. It just

466
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,120
Speaker 1: shows up right when I need it, right when I

467
00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:43,240
Speaker 1: need a refill. And it's a green powder superfood. You

468
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:45,800
Speaker 1: could put a scoop of it in a cup of

469
00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:48,360
Speaker 1: water and drink it that way, mix it up a

470
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:51,640
Speaker 1: little bit. It's very fine, so it's not grainy at all,

471
00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:54,200
Speaker 1: so it mixes really well. In fact, it's so fine

472
00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:57,880
Speaker 1: that when I put it in my shake, it when

473
00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:02,600
Speaker 1: it falls in, there's like this green smoke because it's

474
00:29:02,640 --> 00:29:05,680
Speaker 1: so fine that kind of puffs up. And I say

475
00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:10,120
Speaker 1: that because it mixes really well. It just completely immerses

476
00:29:10,160 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 1: in the water and becomes water. I put it in

477
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 1: a protein shake because I love what it does and

478
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,760
Speaker 1: the love the way it makes me feel. And it's

479
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 1: supplying me with the greens I need for the day

480
00:29:20,800 --> 00:29:24,800
Speaker 1: without eating a ton of salad or vegetables, so I

481
00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:28,000
Speaker 1: could accomplish what I need with my greens in one

482
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:32,240
Speaker 1: protein shake. And I absolutely love that. So AG one.

483
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:38,760
Speaker 1: It's a company that has dedicated their entire being and

484
00:29:38,880 --> 00:29:44,200
Speaker 1: to making a lifestyle friendly, whether that's keto, paleo, vegan,

485
00:29:44,280 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 1: dairy free, gluten free, it's all that containing one gram

486
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:51,640
Speaker 1: less than one gram of sugar, no artificial GMOs, no

487
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 1: nasty chemicals or artificial anything, and it still tastes good.

488
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:58,400
Speaker 1: It supports a better sleep quality and recovery. It supports

489
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:01,520
Speaker 1: mental clarity and alert it's one of the best things

490
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:05,120
Speaker 1: that you could do really in your daily lifestyle. Tons

491
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:08,360
Speaker 1: of people take it for some you know, tons of

492
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 1: people take some sort of multivitamin, and it's important to

493
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:14,360
Speaker 1: choose one with high quality ingredients so that your body

494
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,880
Speaker 1: can actually absorb it. And it's not some like massive

495
00:30:17,920 --> 00:30:20,959
Speaker 1: horse pill that your body can't really absorb, but AAG

496
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 1: one is a small micro habit with big benefits. It's

497
00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:27,440
Speaker 1: one thing you could do every single day to take

498
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: great care of yourself. Your subscription will come with one

499
00:30:30,560 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 1: year's supply of vitamin D that's so important to add

500
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:36,800
Speaker 1: during these winter months when we don't get as much sunlight.

501
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 1: It was created with the founder who experienced a ton

502
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:43,640
Speaker 1: of gut health issues and ended up on a complicated

503
00:30:43,640 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 1: supplement routine to recover. It cost him like one hundred

504
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 1: bucks a day. He then created Athletic Greens after experiencing

505
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:53,800
Speaker 1: how difficult it was to create an optimal nutrition routine

506
00:30:54,360 --> 00:30:57,840
Speaker 1: of his own. So this is a legit company has

507
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:01,400
Speaker 1: over seven thousand and five star reviews record by professional athletes,

508
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:04,840
Speaker 1: trusted by leading health experts such as Tim Ferris and

509
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:08,480
Speaker 1: all kinds of people. Me I'm one of them. I

510
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:11,000
Speaker 1: could raise my hand to that. Right now. It is

511
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:14,480
Speaker 1: time to reclaim your health and arm your immune system

512
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:17,720
Speaker 1: with convenient daily nutrition, especially heading into the flu and

513
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:21,080
Speaker 1: cold season. And just one scoop and a cup of

514
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 1: water every day. That's all you need. That's it. No

515
00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:26,800
Speaker 1: need for a million different pills and supplements to look

516
00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 1: out for your health. To make it easy Athletic Greens

517
00:31:30,240 --> 00:31:32,040
Speaker 1: is going to give you a free once one year

518
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:35,920
Speaker 1: supply of immune supporting Vitamin D and five free travel

519
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:38,000
Speaker 1: packs with your first purchase. All you have to do

520
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 1: is visit Athleticgreens dot com slash granger. Again, that's Athleticgreens

521
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: dot com slash granger to take ownership of your health

522
00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:55,920
Speaker 1: and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance. All right,

523
00:31:55,920 --> 00:31:59,400
Speaker 1: digging back into these questions, the next one subject line

524
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 1: says high school question is Hey Grangeer, I'm a huge fan.

525
00:32:03,120 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 1: My name is Liam. I'm fourteen years old. This is

526
00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:08,280
Speaker 1: my first year in high school and I'm having a

527
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 1: really hard time keeping up my grades this year. This

528
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:14,640
Speaker 1: is mostly because I can't motivate myself to do my work.

529
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 1: I've tried to get help, but no one seems to

530
00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:19,920
Speaker 1: understand what I'm having a hard time with. High school

531
00:32:20,000 --> 00:32:22,400
Speaker 1: is so much harder than I expected it to be.

532
00:32:22,800 --> 00:32:29,760
Speaker 1: Any advice this comes from Liam, and Liam good news

533
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:33,040
Speaker 1: is for you. I have once been a fourteen year

534
00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:35,400
Speaker 1: old boy, and I once was a first year in

535
00:32:35,480 --> 00:32:39,680
Speaker 1: high school, so I can definitely relate man, and I

536
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:42,080
Speaker 1: could relate to that first year, and I could tell

537
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:45,360
Speaker 1: you whatever you think about me, whatever you think about

538
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:49,200
Speaker 1: this podcast or who I am, just remember this. At

539
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,760
Speaker 1: one time when I was fourteen, I felt the same

540
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:58,440
Speaker 1: thing as you. I felt out of place. I felt small,

541
00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:02,000
Speaker 1: I felt like I didn't know. I felt very vulnerable.

542
00:33:02,040 --> 00:33:04,840
Speaker 1: I felt I felt like everyone was looking at me

543
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 1: like I was this this just small, immature, stupid kid.

544
00:33:12,440 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 1: I felt out of place. That's I think you would

545
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:18,320
Speaker 1: feel out of place being fourteen years old in anything

546
00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:20,560
Speaker 1: you did in life, not just your first year of

547
00:33:20,640 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 1: high school. It's tough, and so I want to I

548
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:27,320
Speaker 1: want to acknowledge that that you're not alone. And I

549
00:33:27,440 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 1: bet you there's there's hardly anybody that would listen to

550
00:33:30,760 --> 00:33:35,040
Speaker 1: this podcast and think back to that and think, huh,

551
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:37,479
Speaker 1: that's weird. I didn't. I was great when I was fourteen.

552
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 1: First year in high school. I just crushed it. No,

553
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:45,479
Speaker 1: not many people would think that. So your everything you're

554
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:50,600
Speaker 1: feeling is totally natural. You say this is mostly because

555
00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: I can't motivate myself to do my work. I've tried

556
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 1: getting help, but no one seems to understand when I'm

557
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,640
Speaker 1: having a hard time with Well, I understand, and I

558
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:05,600
Speaker 1: think I would wonder if you're asking the wrong people.

559
00:34:06,920 --> 00:34:10,799
Speaker 1: If you went up to one of your teachers and

560
00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:14,600
Speaker 1: you were totally honest with them and you said, hey, teacher,

561
00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:19,640
Speaker 1: and you just read this email, you said, I'm having

562
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:23,600
Speaker 1: a hard time motivating myself to do the work. I

563
00:34:23,680 --> 00:34:27,239
Speaker 1: really want to, but this is much harder than I

564
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 1: expected the teacher's job. And I guarantee you somebody at

565
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:36,239
Speaker 1: this school is a really, really really good teacher that's

566
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:39,959
Speaker 1: going to say, let's help. How could we let's work

567
00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 1: on this. You know, let's meet at four o'clock today

568
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,399
Speaker 1: in my office and let's walk through this. Let's see

569
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:47,960
Speaker 1: what you're having trouble with, what you're you know, where

570
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:50,879
Speaker 1: are you stumbling? What subjects are you good at? What

571
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:54,279
Speaker 1: subjects are you not good at? I would then I

572
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:59,080
Speaker 1: would lead you, also, liam to some kind of extracurricular

573
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:03,479
Speaker 1: or activity, like I mean, will go down a list.

574
00:35:03,480 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 1: I mean it could for me, it was football. I

575
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:10,960
Speaker 1: just dove into football. It could be track, could be basketball,

576
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:17,200
Speaker 1: could be choir, could be banned, could be chest, club,

577
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:21,239
Speaker 1: could be acting, you can join the theater. There's a

578
00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:24,200
Speaker 1: lot of options at your school. I know there are.

579
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: There's there's options at every school. So I would encourage

580
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:30,000
Speaker 1: you to get involved with this. And when you do that, say,

581
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:33,440
Speaker 1: you go into theater and I didn't do that, but

582
00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,600
Speaker 1: but I knew a lot of people that did. And

583
00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:39,640
Speaker 1: when you get involved with theater, immediately immerse yourself with

584
00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:45,680
Speaker 1: people around you that are like minded, meaning they they

585
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:49,520
Speaker 1: liked theater enough to join, just like you. And so

586
00:35:49,680 --> 00:35:52,319
Speaker 1: when you're in theater and then you start talking about

587
00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:55,520
Speaker 1: this stuff to these other peers that are like minded

588
00:35:55,560 --> 00:35:58,759
Speaker 1: with you, And so you go anybody else having a

589
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:02,840
Speaker 1: hard time with this high school thing like me? And

590
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:06,520
Speaker 1: somebody's going to go, yeah, I didn't really want to

591
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:09,360
Speaker 1: admit it, but I feel like no one understands, and

592
00:36:09,400 --> 00:36:11,239
Speaker 1: you go, me too. That's how I feel. I feel

593
00:36:11,239 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 1: like no one else understands, and they go, yeah, me too.

594
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 1: I just and you go, what are you struggling with?

595
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:20,680
Speaker 1: I'm struggling with Missus Simpson's English class, me too, that

596
00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 1: book we're reading it just makes no sense and they

597
00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:27,239
Speaker 1: go yeah. And So through that, through that communication and

598
00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:30,040
Speaker 1: that community that you get out of like minded people,

599
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,520
Speaker 1: you start finding solutions together in a group. As humans,

600
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:38,560
Speaker 1: we are meant to be put in groups and think

601
00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:41,919
Speaker 1: in groups and socialize in groups. That's just what we do.

602
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:46,000
Speaker 1: It's very difficult for a human to isolate themselves, and

603
00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:49,680
Speaker 1: if they do, it's very rare that you hear of

604
00:36:49,800 --> 00:36:52,840
Speaker 1: some guy that moved to Alaska by himself. It sounds awesome,

605
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:55,880
Speaker 1: sounds romantic. Moved to Alaska by yourself, live in the woods,

606
00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:58,920
Speaker 1: build a cabinet with your bare hands, just you and

607
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:03,319
Speaker 1: a fishing pole like that sounds amazing. But as soon

608
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:05,320
Speaker 1: as a couple of weeks go by, you realize quickly

609
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 1: humans need community, right, so join the community. Don't just

610
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:14,799
Speaker 1: walk the halls and go into different classrooms and sit

611
00:37:14,840 --> 00:37:18,120
Speaker 1: at different desks and think like that you're all alone

612
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:21,279
Speaker 1: and no one understands you. So immediately get involved. This

613
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 1: is a really big deal. It could be literally could

614
00:37:24,040 --> 00:37:28,040
Speaker 1: be anything. Could be the photography club, could be student council,

615
00:37:28,719 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 1: could be the the the I don't know shop, could

616
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:39,200
Speaker 1: be auto mechanics class. There's, like I said, there's there's

617
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:45,920
Speaker 1: a million options. Do that. Find that community and communicate

618
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:49,799
Speaker 1: with your teacher. And then the last thing is just

619
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:55,600
Speaker 1: keep showing up, keep showing up every day, because something's

620
00:37:55,640 --> 00:37:58,319
Speaker 1: gonna happen if you keep showing up and you keep

621
00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 1: showing that commitment to it, then something will change in

622
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:05,839
Speaker 1: terms of you're gonna meet somebody, or something's gonna fall

623
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:08,879
Speaker 1: in your life. You're gonna realize, Man, I love I love,

624
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:11,800
Speaker 1: actually love this history class because I love talking about

625
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:14,399
Speaker 1: World War Two. That's me. I love World War two.

626
00:38:14,520 --> 00:38:17,480
Speaker 1: So man, we've been studying World War two. I actually

627
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 1: love it. I don't like calculus class, but I love history.

628
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:23,759
Speaker 1: And so that's a step up, Like that's a you

629
00:38:23,840 --> 00:38:28,560
Speaker 1: got a foothold now to keep, to keep this ball rolling,

630
00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 1: to keep this high school thing going. And then by

631
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,480
Speaker 1: the time you hit the end of the semester, you've

632
00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:38,880
Speaker 1: got something to stand on your history class. So communicate, fine, community,

633
00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:49,120
Speaker 1: and just show up. Keep showing up, all right, subdecline,

634
00:38:49,120 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 1: this is interesting, Subdecline says. On this next one, my

635
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:55,360
Speaker 1: husband says he's done. Let's see what this says, Granger.

636
00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:57,240
Speaker 1: I've followed you and your wife for quite some time.

637
00:38:58,000 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 1: I've been inspired by both you and her many times.

638
00:39:01,760 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 1: Amber strength has been so inspiring to me. Right now,

639
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 1: I'm just having a hard time staying strong. My husband

640
00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:10,799
Speaker 1: told me two weeks before our third son was to

641
00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:14,719
Speaker 1: be born that he has done. He says, he's unhappy,

642
00:39:15,440 --> 00:39:18,319
Speaker 1: and he has been for some time, and he's just

643
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:21,880
Speaker 1: never brought it up. I take my vows very seriously,

644
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 1: and even though he has cheated on me, I'm still

645
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:28,160
Speaker 1: committed to our marriage. How do I keep my faith

646
00:39:28,239 --> 00:39:32,680
Speaker 1: and strength with everything going on? Thank you, Tabitha, Tabitha,

647
00:39:33,360 --> 00:39:38,799
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I cannot imagine what

648
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 1: you're going through and the strength that it took you

649
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:45,719
Speaker 1: to even write this email and for me to say

650
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:49,759
Speaker 1: it out loud like this on a podcast. I want

651
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:54,360
Speaker 1: to thank you for your vulnerability and your willingness to

652
00:39:54,719 --> 00:39:57,600
Speaker 1: not hide in a closet and disappear. Some people get

653
00:39:57,640 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 1: news like this and they just they they think that

654
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,520
Speaker 1: they're the flawed one and they're the ones that have

655
00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:06,240
Speaker 1: the problems, and their husband was probably right to cheat

656
00:40:06,239 --> 00:40:08,160
Speaker 1: on him, and he's probably right to fall out of

657
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:11,839
Speaker 1: love with them because there's something wrong with them. And

658
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 1: that's the wrong way to go. That's that's the wrong

659
00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:20,520
Speaker 1: way to go. You're your husband is dealing with some

660
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:24,919
Speaker 1: major demons. And I was going to ask you before

661
00:40:24,960 --> 00:40:27,920
Speaker 1: I hit this sentence that says he has cheated on me.

662
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:29,840
Speaker 1: I was going to ask you that sounds like that

663
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:34,360
Speaker 1: might be going on when he says he's unhappy and

664
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:39,320
Speaker 1: he has been for quite some time. That usually doesn't

665
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:43,879
Speaker 1: happen in that way unless he's also seeing somebody else

666
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:46,720
Speaker 1: that makes that's making up for something that he feels

667
00:40:46,800 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 1: lacking in his life. And there's some somebody new is

668
00:40:49,480 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 1: filling some void in him because he's he's not whole

669
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:58,799
Speaker 1: in himself, regardless of you, and so he's seeking it

670
00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:01,480
Speaker 1: from other places. So that means it has nothing to

671
00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:06,319
Speaker 1: do with you. He's he has problems with his confidence

672
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:09,000
Speaker 1: or who he is, or maybe he's getting a little

673
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:11,000
Speaker 1: bit older and he's looking in the mirror and going, man,

674
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 1: I just I think I've missed my prime. I'm out

675
00:41:13,719 --> 00:41:16,000
Speaker 1: of my prime now. I peaked and when I was

676
00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:20,160
Speaker 1: twenty one, and now I need something to help lift

677
00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:22,839
Speaker 1: me up. And my wife is you know, we have

678
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:25,000
Speaker 1: three kids together, and it's kind of old news now

679
00:41:25,040 --> 00:41:28,279
Speaker 1: and I need something new and fresh to replenish me.

680
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:31,480
Speaker 1: So it's not about the new girl being better than you.

681
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:36,600
Speaker 1: It's something missing in him now. I would say on

682
00:41:36,640 --> 00:41:40,800
Speaker 1: this podcast it's God missing out of his life because

683
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,120
Speaker 1: if he had if he was filled with the Holy

684
00:41:43,160 --> 00:41:46,839
Speaker 1: Spirit and he loved Jesus and he was pursuing him passionately.

685
00:41:47,320 --> 00:41:50,160
Speaker 1: This wouldn't this wouldn't happen. It just doesn't. It doesn't

686
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:55,360
Speaker 1: happen that way. But that's not your question. Your question

687
00:41:55,520 --> 00:41:59,440
Speaker 1: is how do I keep my faith and strength with

688
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:03,359
Speaker 1: everything going on? Well, I think immediately, because you brought

689
00:42:03,400 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 1: up faith, immediately you seek the church and seek you

690
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:09,520
Speaker 1: seek wise counsel in the church. And so there's three

691
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 1: steps for you, and it's probably in this order. One pray.

692
00:42:14,680 --> 00:42:17,919
Speaker 1: You take it all to God. You bring everything to him,

693
00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,399
Speaker 1: you lay it at his feet, and you tell him

694
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:24,560
Speaker 1: something like this, God, I can't this this what's going

695
00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 1: on with me right now. It's terrifying, it's humiliating, and

696
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:34,279
Speaker 1: I feel so lost and so vulnerable. I can't do

697
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:39,440
Speaker 1: it at all, can't accomplish happiness on my own. I

698
00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:42,040
Speaker 1: need you, God, and need you. Fill me with your spirit,

699
00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:45,960
Speaker 1: fill me with your strength, increase my faith, show me

700
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:48,080
Speaker 1: that you're a sovereign God, that you're in control, that

701
00:42:48,200 --> 00:42:50,400
Speaker 1: you have a plan for me in my life and

702
00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:53,200
Speaker 1: my kids. Because it feels like the walls are falling

703
00:42:53,360 --> 00:42:57,120
Speaker 1: down right now, Give that to him, Give that to God.

704
00:42:57,200 --> 00:43:00,359
Speaker 1: It's like It's like when I see my son and

705
00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:03,640
Speaker 1: he's he's doing a chore that I've given him right,

706
00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:06,160
Speaker 1: and I'm watching him from the window and I see

707
00:43:06,239 --> 00:43:09,919
Speaker 1: him struggling with the chore, and I know that he's

708
00:43:10,120 --> 00:43:12,399
Speaker 1: he can't do it on his own, but he's going

709
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:14,120
Speaker 1: to try as hard as he can. And I see

710
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:17,160
Speaker 1: it that he's failing over and over and over. I

711
00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:20,120
Speaker 1: know what's going on. I know how it could, how

712
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:23,120
Speaker 1: the problem can be solved, how he can get through this,

713
00:43:24,280 --> 00:43:27,240
Speaker 1: But I'm not going to help him until he finally

714
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:30,439
Speaker 1: comes over to me and he goes, Daddy, I can't

715
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:33,479
Speaker 1: do this. Can you help me? And then I go, yes,

716
00:43:34,239 --> 00:43:37,399
Speaker 1: let me help you. You're ready, you're ready. Now you've

717
00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:40,480
Speaker 1: given it back to me. You've shown me that you're

718
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:42,319
Speaker 1: that you're dedicated to this and you can't do it,

719
00:43:42,360 --> 00:43:45,279
Speaker 1: and you bring it back to me and I go, yeah, buddy,

720
00:43:45,360 --> 00:43:47,319
Speaker 1: let me help you. Let me show you how to

721
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:49,239
Speaker 1: get through this. So that that's what God is doing

722
00:43:49,280 --> 00:43:52,800
Speaker 1: to you. He's watching you and he's seeing the pain,

723
00:43:53,960 --> 00:43:57,880
Speaker 1: and he's he sympathizes with that pain. Our God sympathizes

724
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:01,200
Speaker 1: with every level of suffering that we have. We have

725
00:44:01,239 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 1: a God. We have a God that died on the

726
00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:07,240
Speaker 1: cross as a man, one hundred percent man, one hundred

727
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:11,920
Speaker 1: percent God. He died feeling every bit of emotional and

728
00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:15,879
Speaker 1: physical and spiritual pain that a human could feel. So

729
00:44:15,920 --> 00:44:19,720
Speaker 1: he sees you and he acknowledges that, and he waits

730
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:21,480
Speaker 1: for you to turn to him and go, it's you,

731
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:25,360
Speaker 1: it's yours. That's step one. Step two. You read your Bible.

732
00:44:25,440 --> 00:44:27,399
Speaker 1: You get up every day and you go, God, I'm

733
00:44:27,440 --> 00:44:31,600
Speaker 1: giving it to you. That's that's our communication. Prayer is

734
00:44:31,760 --> 00:44:35,000
Speaker 1: me talking to you. But your Bible, your word, is

735
00:44:35,040 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 1: you talking to me. So I'm gonna soak in this word.

736
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:40,279
Speaker 1: I'm gonna read it every morning. His mercies are new

737
00:44:40,360 --> 00:44:42,640
Speaker 1: every morning. So I'm gonna get up when when the

738
00:44:42,719 --> 00:44:45,720
Speaker 1: mercies are new and fresh, and I'm gonna I'm gonna

739
00:44:45,760 --> 00:44:49,160
Speaker 1: recharge myself. I'm gonna get into your word and i'm

740
00:44:49,160 --> 00:44:50,719
Speaker 1: gonna see what you have to say to me. And

741
00:44:50,719 --> 00:44:52,960
Speaker 1: you're gonna find out that that book is different than

742
00:44:52,960 --> 00:44:56,120
Speaker 1: any other book. Any other book. You read it and

743
00:44:56,160 --> 00:45:00,600
Speaker 1: you start to get to know the book as you

744
00:45:00,680 --> 00:45:02,800
Speaker 1: read it, that's any other book, but the Bible's different.

745
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:04,720
Speaker 1: The Bible. You start to read it and you realize

746
00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:08,000
Speaker 1: at some point the book is getting to know me.

747
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:12,879
Speaker 1: This book knows me before I know it. Your third

748
00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:16,680
Speaker 1: step is seek wise counsel, and I believe you could

749
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,799
Speaker 1: find that at your church, a good church, a good

750
00:45:18,840 --> 00:45:21,319
Speaker 1: solid church. If you don't have a good church in

751
00:45:21,360 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 1: your town, email Take and Read podcast at gmail dot com.

752
00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,799
Speaker 1: That's my buddy, my close friend, pastor Chad, who's on

753
00:45:29,840 --> 00:45:32,600
Speaker 1: this podcast a lot. He helps people find churches. So

754
00:45:32,640 --> 00:45:34,800
Speaker 1: if anyone's listening and they're like, I'm in a town

755
00:45:35,040 --> 00:45:37,719
Speaker 1: and I don't know there's too many options or there's

756
00:45:37,760 --> 00:45:39,879
Speaker 1: not enough options, and I don't know where to go

757
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:43,800
Speaker 1: on Sundays, I don't know what church to join, email

758
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:47,160
Speaker 1: that email Chad Take and Read podcast at gmail dot

759
00:45:47,200 --> 00:45:50,239
Speaker 1: com and ask him. But go find a church in

760
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:53,200
Speaker 1: your town and bring it to bring it to the elders.

761
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:56,640
Speaker 1: Join a small group. You're gonna find other women that

762
00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: have been through the same thing, other men that have

763
00:45:58,640 --> 00:46:00,719
Speaker 1: gone through the same thing from the other side, the

764
00:46:00,760 --> 00:46:03,799
Speaker 1: other perspective, and you're gonna seek wise counsel and you go,

765
00:46:03,840 --> 00:46:05,359
Speaker 1: what do I do? And they're gonna go, we're gonna

766
00:46:05,400 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 1: walk through this with you. So you take it to

767
00:46:09,120 --> 00:46:11,959
Speaker 1: God in prayer, you read your Bible, and you seek

768
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:16,520
Speaker 1: wise counsel, and you will make it through this Tabitha.

769
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:19,160
Speaker 1: It's not gonna go away. It's not gonna get erased

770
00:46:19,239 --> 00:46:22,560
Speaker 1: or disappeared. There's no power of God to just zap

771
00:46:22,600 --> 00:46:25,239
Speaker 1: you like a genie and go, I'm gonna erase this

772
00:46:25,320 --> 00:46:28,799
Speaker 1: problem boom. There's no power in that. The power is

773
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:33,040
Speaker 1: when God goes, I'm gonna get you through this fire together,

774
00:46:33,760 --> 00:46:36,120
Speaker 1: and I'll bring you out the other side, holding your hand,

775
00:46:36,400 --> 00:46:39,719
Speaker 1: carrying you through it. There's a power in that. And

776
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:43,359
Speaker 1: then one day, might be five years, might be ten,

777
00:46:43,440 --> 00:46:46,239
Speaker 1: might be fifteen years. Down the road, you're gonna look

778
00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:48,319
Speaker 1: back and you go there was a turning point in

779
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:53,759
Speaker 1: my life and everything changed for the better. And I'm

780
00:46:53,840 --> 00:46:57,040
Speaker 1: so glad of I'm so glad from my story and

781
00:46:57,080 --> 00:47:00,000
Speaker 1: who I am in the history and this the chief

782
00:47:00,000 --> 00:47:02,600
Speaker 1: eating husband I had, and what I learned from that.

783
00:47:02,680 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 1: I'm so glad I went through it because now I'm stronger,

784
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:09,600
Speaker 1: I'm more refined by fire. It took fire to refine

785
00:47:09,640 --> 00:47:13,600
Speaker 1: the gold, but it made me so much better through

786
00:47:13,640 --> 00:47:18,640
Speaker 1: the fire, through the heat, the compression of this suffering

787
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:22,160
Speaker 1: that you're going through will make you better. And it

788
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:26,279
Speaker 1: sounds so hard to hear that from your perspective. It

789
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:29,000
Speaker 1: sounds so hard to because you seem you seem like

790
00:47:29,040 --> 00:47:30,680
Speaker 1: you're just right in the middle of the fire. How

791
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 1: am I ever going to get out of this? How

792
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:34,120
Speaker 1: am I going to look back and go? I was

793
00:47:34,200 --> 00:47:40,839
Speaker 1: refined by this, this pain. But you will, you will.

794
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 1: And nothing that I've said so far, nothing so far,

795
00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:49,880
Speaker 1: means from what I've heard from you, that you're going

796
00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 1: to absolutely give up on this marriage. I'm not saying

797
00:47:52,480 --> 00:47:56,600
Speaker 1: that because because God can heal him too. He can

798
00:47:56,640 --> 00:47:59,480
Speaker 1: heal him. He could turn this around, He could bring

799
00:47:59,520 --> 00:48:02,040
Speaker 1: him back to you, He could heal this marriage. He can,

800
00:48:03,560 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 1: So I'm not I'm not discounting that that could happen.

801
00:48:06,920 --> 00:48:09,919
Speaker 1: But I'm telling you your task right now for you

802
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:19,120
Speaker 1: and these three kids, And I'm so sorry, Tabitha. Where

803
00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:23,960
Speaker 1: do we go next? Right here? Here's a lighter hearted one,

804
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:28,000
Speaker 1: So this podcast question. Hello Granger, my name is Brendan.

805
00:48:28,040 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 1: I'm from Indiana. I came to your recent concert in Valparaiso, Indiana.

806
00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:35,560
Speaker 1: Amazing show, and I was wondering if Earl Dibblis Junior

807
00:48:35,600 --> 00:48:37,759
Speaker 1: ever dropped the guitar when it was thrown to him

808
00:48:37,760 --> 00:48:39,239
Speaker 1: from the side of the stage. I've been wondering this

809
00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:41,880
Speaker 1: for a long time. Thanks for the amazing music. It

810
00:48:41,920 --> 00:48:44,480
Speaker 1: has brought me through so many hard times. Thanks for responding.

811
00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:49,640
Speaker 1: Yee yep, what's up, Brendan. Shout out to Indiana Earl.

812
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:52,080
Speaker 1: There's a moment at the end of our show when Chris,

813
00:48:52,080 --> 00:48:56,640
Speaker 1: my tour manager, throws Earl's guitar to him. And depending

814
00:48:56,680 --> 00:48:58,680
Speaker 1: on the show, it could be a far throw, it

815
00:48:58,680 --> 00:49:01,640
Speaker 1: could be a short throw. But we've done it for

816
00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:05,440
Speaker 1: eleven years now. We've done this, this antic as we

817
00:49:05,520 --> 00:49:09,840
Speaker 1: call it. And I can remember two times when the

818
00:49:09,880 --> 00:49:12,439
Speaker 1: guitar was dropped. And the rule is, if the guitar

819
00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:14,440
Speaker 1: has ever dropped, I have to smash it on the stage,

820
00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:16,759
Speaker 1: like that's the rule. I have to destroy it right

821
00:49:16,760 --> 00:49:21,160
Speaker 1: then and there. And so probably not many of you

822
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:24,000
Speaker 1: listening have seen this happen, but one time was in

823
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:29,799
Speaker 1: Corpus Christi, Texas at Concrete Amphitheater Concrete Street. I Uh,

824
00:49:30,120 --> 00:49:33,880
Speaker 1: there was a big wind and Blake threw it. Is

825
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:36,040
Speaker 1: when Blake was throwing the guitar, he threw it and

826
00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:39,320
Speaker 1: the wind caught it and just sailed into Randy Rogers

827
00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:42,200
Speaker 1: drum set. So that was bad. That was a bad day.

828
00:49:43,400 --> 00:49:45,480
Speaker 1: And I destroyed it. I just took it and took

829
00:49:45,560 --> 00:49:48,480
Speaker 1: the guitar and destroyed it. These are replicas, by the way,

830
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,480
Speaker 1: there's not there's not. I don't use the original. The

831
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:53,440
Speaker 1: original is in this podcast room with me. The second

832
00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:55,480
Speaker 1: time it happened, we were on Florida Georgia line tour

833
00:49:55,520 --> 00:49:59,040
Speaker 1: and we were in Canada in an arena and Frank Maglin,

834
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:04,000
Speaker 1: another guy was throwing it and and he missed it

835
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 1: as it was going back to him. So I caught it,

836
00:50:06,360 --> 00:50:08,240
Speaker 1: played it, threw it back to him, and he dropped

837
00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:10,520
Speaker 1: it as it was going back to him. And so

838
00:50:11,600 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 1: although it wasn't it wasn't that big a deal to

839
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:16,360
Speaker 1: the crowd. All the other bands that were there that

840
00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 1: night just gave his grief for years. They still do.

841
00:50:20,880 --> 00:50:24,640
Speaker 1: They called called him Frank but butter Hands Frank Butterhands.

842
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:29,600
Speaker 1: But Chris Lee, my tour manager, took overthrowing. We have

843
00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,399
Speaker 1: not missed one since. So good question, and we'll see

844
00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:40,880
Speaker 1: we'll see what happens next question. The subject line interesting

845
00:50:40,920 --> 00:50:44,640
Speaker 1: again says I wasn't religious enough. Hey, Granger, my name's Kyle.

846
00:50:45,080 --> 00:50:47,920
Speaker 1: I'm from Sarasota Springs, New York. I'm a sophomore in

847
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:51,200
Speaker 1: college and the year started out great. I met literally

848
00:50:51,239 --> 00:50:53,920
Speaker 1: the perfect person from me. It was such an amazing

849
00:50:54,000 --> 00:50:56,640
Speaker 1: change from the past relationship I was in. But after

850
00:50:56,680 --> 00:50:59,799
Speaker 1: a couple months, he acted so weird and we went

851
00:50:59,840 --> 00:51:03,280
Speaker 1: on a and she ended our relationship because I wasn't

852
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:08,759
Speaker 1: religious enough for her. I told her that I want

853
00:51:08,760 --> 00:51:10,719
Speaker 1: her to be happy and if that means us breaking up,

854
00:51:10,960 --> 00:51:14,080
Speaker 1: then I'm okay with that, even though I wasn't because

855
00:51:14,120 --> 00:51:17,319
Speaker 1: I miss talking to her. I'm somewhat religious, but not

856
00:51:17,480 --> 00:51:20,600
Speaker 1: crazy about it. But I never thought about that relationship

857
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:24,040
Speaker 1: that our relationship would end over it, and it hurts

858
00:51:24,320 --> 00:51:26,520
Speaker 1: because I know it's my fault. I've tried talking to

859
00:51:26,560 --> 00:51:29,399
Speaker 1: some new girls, but it just seems like everyone only

860
00:51:29,400 --> 00:51:31,279
Speaker 1: wants to hook up and I've never been into that.

861
00:51:31,840 --> 00:51:33,560
Speaker 1: My question is what should I do. I know God

862
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:36,640
Speaker 1: has a plan set for everyone and everyone will work

863
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:40,560
Speaker 1: it out in the end, but I've lost some motivation

864
00:51:40,719 --> 00:51:44,719
Speaker 1: because after my relationship ended, it seems that everything just

865
00:51:44,760 --> 00:51:47,440
Speaker 1: got worse. If you have any advice, please let me know.

866
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:53,120
Speaker 1: It comes from Kyle in New York. What's up, Kyle,

867
00:51:53,160 --> 00:51:59,840
Speaker 1: shout out to New York. Tough situation you're in, but common.

868
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:05,120
Speaker 1: I would tell you a couple of things. If a

869
00:52:05,120 --> 00:52:09,799
Speaker 1: girl tells you she wants to break up because you're

870
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:13,360
Speaker 1: not religious enough, I think that sounds like an excuse.

871
00:52:14,120 --> 00:52:17,160
Speaker 1: It sounds like it's not me, it's you, you know,

872
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:19,560
Speaker 1: or it's not you, it's me. However you want to

873
00:52:19,560 --> 00:52:23,439
Speaker 1: look at it, it sounds like you're a common breakup line,

874
00:52:23,600 --> 00:52:27,080
Speaker 1: and that's that is a common one, like sorry, this

875
00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:29,720
Speaker 1: is a God thing, Like God, God has a different

876
00:52:29,719 --> 00:52:32,920
Speaker 1: plan for me. And there's truth to that. And I'm

877
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:35,800
Speaker 1: sure there's truth to what she's saying. But the fact

878
00:52:35,920 --> 00:52:38,759
Speaker 1: is it just wouldn't have gone down that way. If

879
00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:44,080
Speaker 1: she truly loved you in a in a life partner

880
00:52:44,160 --> 00:52:46,960
Speaker 1: type way, then it just wouldn't have gone down like that.

881
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:50,000
Speaker 1: She would have said, hey, Kyle, we need to talk,

882
00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:52,880
Speaker 1: and she sits you down and she just goes, I

883
00:52:52,920 --> 00:52:56,840
Speaker 1: love you. I can see myself spending the rest of

884
00:52:56,840 --> 00:53:01,000
Speaker 1: my life with you. But there's something that's been bothering

885
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:03,279
Speaker 1: me that I want to I want to walk through

886
00:53:03,320 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 1: with you. I'm I'm becoming closer to God. And I

887
00:53:08,040 --> 00:53:10,319
Speaker 1: feel like you're not and I want to start taking

888
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:12,920
Speaker 1: you to church with me, right Like, that's that's just

889
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:16,120
Speaker 1: the way it would go down if she truly loved you.

890
00:53:16,160 --> 00:53:20,799
Speaker 1: But she doesn't. I know, I know that's tough, but

891
00:53:21,360 --> 00:53:23,640
Speaker 1: that's that's the campfire talk we're having. You know, this

892
00:53:23,680 --> 00:53:25,760
Speaker 1: is a safe spot around the campfire. And I'm looking

893
00:53:25,760 --> 00:53:27,440
Speaker 1: at it from the outside looking in, and I'm just

894
00:53:27,520 --> 00:53:30,520
Speaker 1: telling you, she would have tried harder to make it work.

895
00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:32,440
Speaker 1: She would have this would have drug out for a

896
00:53:32,600 --> 00:53:36,440
Speaker 1: year of her taking you to church and working and praying.

897
00:53:36,520 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 1: Can we pray together, Kyle? You know, like can we pray?

898
00:53:38,800 --> 00:53:42,680
Speaker 1: Because But it's just not that. It's not that she's

899
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 1: using that as an excuse. Maybe she likes another guy.

900
00:53:47,480 --> 00:53:51,120
Speaker 1: Maybe she has her eyes on somebody else already. That's

901
00:53:51,400 --> 00:53:55,040
Speaker 1: that could be. Maybe she just doesn't love you anymore,

902
00:53:55,640 --> 00:53:58,040
Speaker 1: or never really did. I know these are hard words

903
00:53:58,120 --> 00:54:01,520
Speaker 1: to hear, but I'm trying trying to be honest. Would

904
00:54:01,680 --> 00:54:06,120
Speaker 1: this podcast would suck if I just sugarcoated everything and said, no, man,

905
00:54:06,160 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 1: she probably loves you. I don't think she does, Kyle,

906
00:54:10,640 --> 00:54:12,440
Speaker 1: And so I would I would let her go. I

907
00:54:12,440 --> 00:54:15,680
Speaker 1: would let her go, but I would I personally me,

908
00:54:15,880 --> 00:54:17,920
Speaker 1: I would want to dig in with you around this

909
00:54:18,000 --> 00:54:24,120
Speaker 1: campfire and talk about this religious thing. Right. It's important

910
00:54:24,280 --> 00:54:28,839
Speaker 1: to know that you're who you're listening to. I am

911
00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:33,520
Speaker 1: a Christian follower of Christ, and I don't believe in

912
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:41,000
Speaker 1: orthodox religion. I don't believe in structured legalist religion at all.

913
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:45,319
Speaker 1: I don't believe in you gotta you gotta pray three

914
00:54:45,320 --> 00:54:46,960
Speaker 1: times a day, and you gotta face west, and you

915
00:54:46,960 --> 00:54:49,080
Speaker 1: gotta put your mat down, and you gotta you have

916
00:54:49,160 --> 00:54:50,920
Speaker 1: to go to church, and you have to get baptized,

917
00:54:50,960 --> 00:54:53,080
Speaker 1: and you have to I don't believe in have to's.

918
00:54:53,680 --> 00:54:58,320
Speaker 1: I believe in a personal relationship with our savior, Jesus,

919
00:54:59,560 --> 00:55:03,960
Speaker 1: and that through the faith in that, through the trust,

920
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 1: the complete surrender to that, the fruits of it, the outcrop.

921
00:55:10,800 --> 00:55:15,160
Speaker 1: What happens after that is you want to be better.

922
00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:21,840
Speaker 1: You want to start aligning your life with Christ. You

923
00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:24,680
Speaker 1: want to start being more like He taught us to be.

924
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:30,319
Speaker 1: You want to not in a religious orderly perfect. I

925
00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:32,359
Speaker 1: got to be perfect to get to God. Way, That's

926
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:36,000
Speaker 1: not it. It never is. In fact, when Jesus was

927
00:55:36,040 --> 00:55:40,359
Speaker 1: on earth, he totally disrupted the Pharisees and anyone that

928
00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:43,120
Speaker 1: thought like that, anyone that thought you can get to

929
00:55:43,160 --> 00:55:45,719
Speaker 1: heaven by being perfect, and you have to do this

930
00:55:45,840 --> 00:55:47,360
Speaker 1: in this and line it all up, and if you

931
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:49,920
Speaker 1: do it enough, and then the gods like Santa Claus

932
00:55:50,239 --> 00:55:52,320
Speaker 1: and he has a naughty list and a good list,

933
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:54,600
Speaker 1: and the more checks you get on the good list,

934
00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:57,080
Speaker 1: the closer you're going to get to heaven. Jesus just

935
00:55:57,280 --> 00:56:01,040
Speaker 1: disrupted that mentality, and as humans, we constantly fall back

936
00:56:01,080 --> 00:56:04,239
Speaker 1: into thinking that that's what we need to do. This

937
00:56:04,320 --> 00:56:09,280
Speaker 1: is off topic, but it's relevant to the idea that

938
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 1: she says you're not religious, and you say your quote

939
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,239
Speaker 1: is I am somewhat religious, but not crazy about it.

940
00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:19,479
Speaker 1: But then two lines later you say, I know God

941
00:56:19,520 --> 00:56:23,279
Speaker 1: has a plan set for everyone. Those two things you

942
00:56:23,280 --> 00:56:26,160
Speaker 1: got to admit they don't really line up. Because although

943
00:56:26,640 --> 00:56:29,520
Speaker 1: I'm trying to be anti religion with you, trying to

944
00:56:29,560 --> 00:56:33,479
Speaker 1: sit with you and be anti religious at the same time,

945
00:56:33,520 --> 00:56:38,279
Speaker 1: if you truly trust that God has a plan and

946
00:56:38,320 --> 00:56:43,000
Speaker 1: then he's sovereign, meaning all knowing, all powerful, all creating,

947
00:56:43,880 --> 00:56:47,680
Speaker 1: if you truly believe that with faith, then I don't

948
00:56:47,680 --> 00:56:51,719
Speaker 1: think you would say I'm somewhat religious. So do you

949
00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:53,440
Speaker 1: see the difference in what I'm trying to say that

950
00:56:55,360 --> 00:56:59,920
Speaker 1: although Jesus came in as anti establishment, anti religious groups,

951
00:57:01,560 --> 00:57:03,960
Speaker 1: there is a there is still an outcropping a fruit

952
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:08,279
Speaker 1: of what you would see from you and your life.

953
00:57:08,320 --> 00:57:10,440
Speaker 1: And I think you would quickly say, I might not

954
00:57:10,440 --> 00:57:15,080
Speaker 1: be religious, but I love Jesus and I'm pursuing him passionately.

955
00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:19,120
Speaker 1: I'm seeking a personal relationship with him. I think I

956
00:57:19,160 --> 00:57:23,160
Speaker 1: think you would have included something like that if that's

957
00:57:23,160 --> 00:57:26,720
Speaker 1: what you truly felt, and so I would encourage I

958
00:57:26,760 --> 00:57:30,960
Speaker 1: would encourage you there that as you're as you're kind

959
00:57:30,960 --> 00:57:33,920
Speaker 1: of navigating the new chapter of your life without her,

960
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: and you're trying to figure out if you want to

961
00:57:36,640 --> 00:57:38,360
Speaker 1: fight for her and bring her back, or if you're

962
00:57:38,360 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 1: going to find somebody new, or if you're going to

963
00:57:40,360 --> 00:57:44,120
Speaker 1: go solo for a little bit. During that that all

964
00:57:44,160 --> 00:57:49,360
Speaker 1: these decisions you're just rolling around with, then you start

965
00:57:49,400 --> 00:57:52,400
Speaker 1: wrestling with this idea that maybe maybe I don't have

966
00:57:52,480 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 1: the relationship with God that I thought I had, and

967
00:57:55,160 --> 00:57:58,000
Speaker 1: maybe there's there's some kind of truth to what she

968
00:57:58,160 --> 00:58:00,960
Speaker 1: told me. I'm not going to take what she said

969
00:58:01,200 --> 00:58:07,720
Speaker 1: is is absolute mandates for me to start being more

970
00:58:07,800 --> 00:58:12,919
Speaker 1: structurally religious. But I'm going to wonder if maybe there's

971
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:17,200
Speaker 1: something in my life that it's not kind of not

972
00:58:17,280 --> 00:58:20,600
Speaker 1: lining up with what Jesus wants from me. And it

973
00:58:20,600 --> 00:58:24,120
Speaker 1: doesn't start from me doing those things. It's the opposite.

974
00:58:24,120 --> 00:58:27,720
Speaker 1: It starts from me pursuing Jesus. And like I said

975
00:58:27,720 --> 00:58:29,600
Speaker 1: earlier in this podcast, it starts with you, which just

976
00:58:29,600 --> 00:58:33,919
Speaker 1: going just just like just like the girl that lost

977
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:40,640
Speaker 1: her cousin, going to Jesus and going can't do this anymore.

978
00:58:40,880 --> 00:58:45,400
Speaker 1: I've tried. I've tried, and things keep falling apart around me,

979
00:58:45,560 --> 00:58:48,640
Speaker 1: and I feel depression, and I feel lost, and I

980
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:51,160
Speaker 1: feel broken, and I don't want to do it and

981
00:58:51,200 --> 00:58:52,880
Speaker 1: I can't do it. So God, I'm giving it back

982
00:58:52,880 --> 00:58:55,400
Speaker 1: to you, to you. Just take it from me. Take

983
00:58:55,440 --> 00:58:59,160
Speaker 1: it from me, let me pursue you, use me, use

984
00:58:59,200 --> 00:59:01,920
Speaker 1: me as a vessel, like just tear me apart and

985
00:59:02,000 --> 00:59:04,520
Speaker 1: use me for your purpose, not mine. I don't want

986
00:59:04,520 --> 00:59:07,640
Speaker 1: to do mine anymore. Keeps failing, it only ends up

987
00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:09,800
Speaker 1: in depression. I might have little victories here and there,

988
00:59:10,120 --> 00:59:14,680
Speaker 1: but it leaves me feeling empty in the end. That's

989
00:59:14,720 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 1: what I would have. That's the conversation I would have tonight, Kyle.

990
00:59:19,360 --> 00:59:21,320
Speaker 1: I appreciate you, buddy. I know I gave you way

991
00:59:21,360 --> 00:59:26,080
Speaker 1: more than what you're really asking, but that's my thoughts

992
00:59:26,720 --> 00:59:29,200
Speaker 1: and that's what you get from this podcast, my thoughts.

993
00:59:30,040 --> 00:59:33,280
Speaker 1: Thank y'all for listening. Thanks for joining me. We got

994
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:36,480
Speaker 1: a new year coming up and a whole new year

995
00:59:36,480 --> 00:59:39,520
Speaker 1: of podcast. Thanks for being with me every Monday morning.

996
00:59:40,080 --> 00:59:42,240
Speaker 1: I love you guys. We'll see you soon. Ye yeep.

997
00:59:42,520 --> 00:59:45,560
Speaker 1: Thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate

998
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:47,760
Speaker 1: all of you guys. You could help me out by

999
00:59:47,880 --> 00:59:51,680
Speaker 1: rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe

1000
00:59:51,720 --> 00:59:55,120
Speaker 1: to this channel, hit that little like button and notification

1001
00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:59,080
Speaker 1: spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video.

1002
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:00,800
Speaker 1: If you have a QUI question for me that you

1003
01:00:00,800 --> 01:00:05,240
Speaker 1: would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail

1004
01:00:05,600 --> 01:00:07,000
Speaker 1: dot com. Ye