00:00:08 Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear. 00:00:17 Speaker 2: But you're a guess to my home. 00:00:21 Speaker 1: You gotta come to be empty, And I said, no guests, your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how did you dare to surbey me? 00:00:48 Speaker 2: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Joe Rogan. I hope you're doing all right. I hope you're having a nice day, you know. I hope that if you go out today, if you've recently moved to a new neighborhood and you feel like going out for a coffee, then it feels like it's going to be a five minute thing. Go do it. But if you do that, when you get there, do not update your phone, because there's a strong chance that suddenly you're going to be driving up and down a mountain. You're not going to know how to get back home. You're going to circle back to the coffee place. It's going to end up being a thirty five to forty minute trip. So that's just my piece of advice for you. And other than that, I just want to welcome our guest. 00:01:37 Speaker 3: Uh. 00:01:38 Speaker 2: He's just absolutely wonderful and I'm thrilled that he's here. Gabe Leadman, welcome. 00:01:43 Speaker 4: Thank you, I said, no gifts, the absolute designer of OS fourteen. 00:01:52 Speaker 2: In every way. Well, thank you for this update. You know it's. 00:01:57 Speaker 4: Oh, is it that it's always bad at first rate? 00:02:02 Speaker 2: Well, I never update at first, but you know, I saw like it was trending on the internet, and if something's trending on the internet, I've got to give it a shot. Absolutely got to have it. I thought it would be a quick like thing, but literally, like I think, it took twenty minutes. And then I think it requires some level of service, and I had gotten into an area without service, so there was a I got halfway through the update and then I set it so and this is me literally driving up at knowing I needed to be back for this podcast, and driving up and down this mountain that's in between my neighborhood and the neighborhood where the coffee was. And it was a real panic. And now, god damn, I don't notice any different differences. Why didn't I just wait till I went to bed. I don't know. Well, that's a great question, because it'll just do it for you if you're in bed, right, I don't wake company it's just like that's how your life has always been. 00:02:56 Speaker 4: Yeah, how long do you usually wait to update? Well, I wait several days. I have not updated it yet. 00:03:03 Speaker 2: It came out yesterday, right yesterday or today? 00:03:06 Speaker 4: You know, Yeah, no, I'll wait a couple of days because there's bugs. 00:03:11 Speaker 2: Right, usually people you let everybody else suffer through it. Yes, exactly. Yeah, I'm in no rush. 00:03:18 Speaker 4: I think I'm I think the OS is fine as is right now for me. So if there was a huge problem, maybe i'd get into it quicker. 00:03:27 Speaker 2: Have you ever had like a big problem with the OS? Says I Ever been an update where you're like, oh, I wish I hadn't done it this time. 00:03:34 Speaker 4: Not that I recall, No, I guess I'm slow enough that I'm getting into it. Will always be points something by the time I'm jumping on right right. 00:03:45 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I feel like with any update to any you know, there'll be like a website update or whatever, and people will just be screaming about it, and I'll think, oh, this is a little bit different, but who cares. Oh, when they redesigned Twitter, that was huge for people. It's always huge if a button on the website gets moved a quarter of an inch. People have yeah, always the full meltdown. We have to go yeah, and then everyone gets used to it, and then they're ready to complain about the next update. Yes, exactly. It's I don't know, know, I have not. 00:04:15 Speaker 4: None of the OS's have stood out to me as particularly problematic. They all work better than if I were to sort of, you know, make my own phone and try and navigate. 00:04:28 Speaker 2: What would your phone look like. I'd love to see you give that a shot. I think I would start with a circle. I go round. 00:04:34 Speaker 4: It would look like a little with it would look like the little thing that birth control comes in. 00:04:40 Speaker 2: Oh. That feels like a real natural starting place for a device. Yeah, it's just sort of a clamshellun Oh, Gabe, how are you. It's so nice to see you. I'm good. I'm you know. I love the state of the world, of course, no complaints. So I love it. 00:05:01 Speaker 4: I love the environment, I love politics, I love public health. I love all this stuff that we're doing. I think we've I think we're nailing it. 00:05:11 Speaker 2: It's good complaints year. It's the ring complaint year that see, sort of we're gliding friction free. It feels good speaking of all that. I feel like the last time I saw you was at the gym we would go to, which is do people know that we went to the gym together? Well? 00:05:36 Speaker 4: They do? 00:05:36 Speaker 2: Now, yeah, it doesn't come up on other episodes. You should do like a ten minute thing usually halfway through, where I'll just say I'll bring up to the guests you know that Gabling and I go to the same gym, and then it leads to a lot of conversation. 00:05:51 Speaker 4: So all the hottest bodies in comedy Meathan Fielder, Jake Weissman, all the hits. 00:06:01 Speaker 2: It truly is so many comedy people for whatever reason. You need to find patient zero of the comedy community who started at this gym. Well, I'll tell you who it is. 00:06:11 Speaker 4: You know I do so, well, okay, then that the super spreader of the popularity of this one gym is Max Olvestry, who he is actually redded and but so he he's who I who got me into it? 00:06:31 Speaker 2: But who got him into it? Who was also shredded is Darcy Karnan. Oh interesting, So you think that she's kind of there. I think she's patient zero. Darcy is definitely would be patient zero. 00:06:43 Speaker 4: She I don't think she I think she goes through a harder gym now, oh, I think she graduated. 00:06:49 Speaker 2: Yes, what is the next level beyond this? Because you know it's hard. I leave dry heaping every single time. Yeah, it's hard. Wait, I mean they've been closed this whole time, right, or are you still working out? I'm not. I'm not fully well. I'm holding parties at the gym at this point. No, I haven't. You know, I can remember my last scheduled appointment. There was March thirtieth, and they I think they, you know, around March twelfth or whatever, this all started happening, and I thought, oh, we've got two weeks and we'll probably be fine. I'll be able to go back to the gym. Yes, And of course that never came true. I think they did briefly reopen for a period and they were taking some level of precautions. But I didn't feel that I could go. 00:07:38 Speaker 4: I got them to email me workouts for home, right, and then I didn't do many of them, but I said that I didn't. I paid for them, like working out, Yeah, you pay you're basically working out. 00:07:55 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, that's truly one of the special things about going to that gym. 00:07:59 Speaker 4: Was. 00:08:00 Speaker 2: I felt like, if I'm going to pay money, I do have to commit to this on some level. Like every time I'm going they took cash only, so it felt like a real transaction. It was like, I'm losing money if I'm not putting some level of effort exactly exactly. You were going multiple times a week. I was going multiple times a week. 00:08:19 Speaker 4: You would never guess I look exactly the same today as I did. 00:08:22 Speaker 2: Then when I was going all the time, it's crazy we're doing I mean we would only run into each other occasionally, but I felt like you were doing intense workouts. It was wild. I was trying. I was trying. Yeah, where does the strength come from? I could do it once a week and then I need to recovery. It was so hard. I mean, well, here's the thing. 00:08:39 Speaker 4: One of the best things about that workout and what kept me coming back is that you could cheat. 00:08:43 Speaker 2: Wait, how would you cheat? 00:08:44 Speaker 4: Because they would do like four clients at the same time, so it was a real honorous system. So it was like, you know, they would say, like, do this fifteen times and maybe you know sometimes I wouldn't do all fifteen and I'm sure I'm only hurting myself there, but I liked that it was a little bit hands off. 00:09:03 Speaker 2: Yeah, it was just it was like a twenty five percent eyes off, yes, yeah, which felt good to me. That was the level of training I was ready for. See, but I would bring this particular neurosis of just being absolutely at all times worried about money and like, yeah, so I felt like if I'm going to spend this, I'm going to do every moment of this and then I can take the week off. And so it was horrible. It felt it took so much more sense that you're that's more correct than what I did. 00:09:32 Speaker 4: I paid them to just sort of let me cheat their in their crush, just stayed fad, didn't look any different start to finish, but you know, showed up for something. 00:09:43 Speaker 2: It was hard. What I was doing was still hard. It was hard. It was a good workout. I miss it. I missed them. To the trainers themselves. They're a funny, great couple. Loved them. Yeah, hopefully at some point, well I'll be able to return. Who knows you're you're built like you're wire three and built. I'm you know, I know that I have an incredible body. You know, I had not started. That was literally the first time in my life I had like worked out in earnest outside of like seventh grade gym or whatever where you run around the gym or what have you. So you're a naturally thin person, yeah, I guess you know. I exercise and try to eat health health healthily. Is that a word? 00:10:34 Speaker 3: Yeah? 00:10:34 Speaker 2: It does not feel like a natural that comes out of your mouth. Too many h's and l's. But no, I don't know. I don't know. It's all the whole thing. But do you do you feel like you as far as we've now established that you are willing to lie and be dishonest at the gym, are there any other situations that you like cheat cheat out of? I need not so much. 00:11:00 Speaker 4: I I mean, I keep I keep feelings to myself. Sure, I'm one of those people I say things are okay when they're not. These are just ways I cheat myself. 00:11:12 Speaker 2: I guess. Is that, like, I imagine that's a difficult thing within a relationship. Yeah, totally. Things can build up. Things can build up, for sure. And are there any attempts to share your feelings or is it always? Yeah? 00:11:29 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean either, like it'll become so obvious that something's wrong because I am not amazing at hiding. 00:11:38 Speaker 2: It or or I will I will. 00:11:41 Speaker 4: Summon the strength to have a conversation. Sure, but I'll eat a lot of shit. First, is in particular you like to eat in these situations? Oh no, I mean each ship like I have a bad time, but I eat shit. I mean I'm just literally eat shit. 00:11:59 Speaker 2: I thought were like talking about comforting your feelings, because that feels like something I would do with food. 00:12:04 Speaker 4: Like, yeah, yeah, comfort eating. I'm a salty, crunchy. I'm a snack person like that. Oh you know what I got really into this year was sugary soda sugar? 00:12:15 Speaker 2: Really, yes, this is like a return to like you hadn't for a while and now your back. Yeah, what are you drinking? I love mountain dew? Oh fantastic, it's a duissance. Is do you just like a plain mountain dew? Or you're doing like a you know, a gamer fuel. 00:12:34 Speaker 4: I can get into code red, I can get into code red. I would all go for the neon green first, right, right, But a Code red really tastes like Shirley Temples, which is a real Oh that's childhood, that's the flavor. Right, So it's pretty good, just like a black burning cherry flavor. Yes, exactly, you know, that's that's a real that's a real treat for me. I like a soda. 00:12:57 Speaker 2: How often are you drinking a soda? 00:12:59 Speaker 3: You know? 00:13:00 Speaker 4: There have been times where it was like once a day. I haven't had a soda in weeks or if not months now. But it was one of the first quarantine buys. It was like, you know, like two twelve packs. We had a cherry coke and a Mountain deal and I would open one a day. I don't know if I always got through it, but it was it's a good afternoon pick me up right right. 00:13:25 Speaker 2: Yeah, I haven't had like a sugar soda in I can't. I couldn't tell you how long, you know, Like I worked at a cafe bakery for a period in my like a drink college, and would drink so much soda enormousness because you're given free soda. And yeah, I got sick. I got the flu, and then for somewhat reason, the idea of sugar soda just didn't sound right to me anymore. And that's when I got on the diet train. Oh you do diet soda? Do do zeros coke z. I'll do a coke. I'm really not. I mean, diet pepsi is maybe the worst liquid in the world. Yeah, it's pretty bad, but I'll do a diet mountain dew. I love that. There was a particularly low point. I think it was probably twenty thirteen. I was still deeply in the closet. I was living in Los Angeles, and for whatever reason, I went to I walked to Ralph's in mid city Los Angeles at about eleven PM to buy a diet mountain dew. Oh that's late. Oh yeah, I don't understand what the planet was eleven PM. I got it, and I was drinking on the way back, and I walked past the l Ray Theater and there was a like a group of very good looking men, well extremely well dressed that I made my way through while drinking my diet mountain dew. And as I was doing it, I turned to the left and right inches from my face was Morrissey. Oh my god. And so it felt like a real just strange. Ah yeah, And I felt maybe as bad as a human possibly I felt like absolute trash. 00:15:07 Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, that You're like, this is clear sign I should be indoors right now. 00:15:15 Speaker 2: Yeah, no one should be walking down the street drinking a Mountain two. But does hero heroin hours? It truly is heroin a diet mountain do? Yes? What else have been you've been doing with your time? Well? I have been very lucky. I've been working right during this whole time. I'm wanna it's pure luck, pure luck. 00:15:39 Speaker 4: That I had a job that did not lay me off or stop during this. 00:15:46 Speaker 2: So that has been the greatest blessing. I just pure luck. Something to occupy your time, something to occupy my time. It occupies my brain. 00:15:57 Speaker 4: So yeah, I've been working on a TV show that I created, and we were like a little less than halfway done writing when we went into lockdown and finished. 00:16:10 Speaker 2: The writing all over zoom. 00:16:12 Speaker 4: And it's an animated show, so it's something that every department, everyone who works on the show can do from home, right woful ends. And it was just just a fluke. It's crazy. It's not anything we could have planned for, and it was. It's such a blessing crazy. 00:16:29 Speaker 2: And the show is next year. Yeah, it comes out June twenty one. Okay, well yeah, just we'll save this episode till mid May. Yeah, do you. 00:16:40 Speaker 4: I want to say late, No, do you put it out a Memorial Day like our Blockbuster episode? 00:16:46 Speaker 2: Yeah? Perfect, This is going to be broadcast. This will be the first thing playing in theaters post pandemic. Well that's that's exciting. I mean, so it's been good. Yeah, I mean you can. The show is called Q Force, And the show is called Q Force. It's an animated comedy action show. 00:17:10 Speaker 4: And uh, it's about LGBTQ superspies. It's kind of like Wonderful James Bond, but a whole little team of them. Who could ask for Yeah, it's a cool genre. I love action stuff, so it's been fun to write that in. Our cast is amazing. It's Sean Hayes and Wanda Sykes and Laurie Metcalf and Matt Rogers and Patty Harrison. 00:17:38 Speaker 2: Oh that is beautiful. That's crazy, truly. Yeah, to ask for more, Glori Metcalf. That's why Ri Metcalf. Yeah, I mean, God bless everybody else there. But I think we can all say. 00:17:48 Speaker 4: I mean, we can all agree that she's the one for sure make her president. 00:17:54 Speaker 2: She's as nice as you would hope. 00:17:56 Speaker 4: Really, I love to tell people that, like because She's someone that I've everyone like identifies as like could be a friend of theirs or someone they would love to have lunch with. 00:18:06 Speaker 2: She literally is so nice and so fucking relief. Of course she has she has reached a level where she I mean, people who have done much less have become much worse people. So she could be absolutely terrible and people would be like, well, she's a laur Metcalf. 00:18:24 Speaker 4: Yes, absolutely, she could have been an absolute monster exactly. She's the type of person where you're like, well, I'll just eat I'll just eat this and we'll get through it. But yeah, I know, she was so nice and like I wade all the scripts before we started recording, and. 00:18:43 Speaker 2: Just a professional pro, a pro. Oh, it's so nice to deal with a professional who continues to be a professional throughout their career. Exactly exactly, Gabe. I you know, I could talk about Lori Metcalf all day, but I feel like there's something I need to talk to you about. And yesterday I was speeding through your neighborhood and I uh decided to slow down and say hi. You know, we hadn't seen each other since the gym. I just thought I would check in and I came to your door and you were holding a little yellow gift bag, but you were also holding something we should talk about before we get into this. A little ziploc bag with a blueberry muffin in it, Yes, which I obviously took home an. 00:19:38 Speaker 4: Ate which was just my husband made that, So I thought I should keep it separate to give him full credit on that one. 00:19:46 Speaker 2: Right, full credit. And it was an Did he make those from scratch? Was it a yes? No? Not an mix? It was a blueberry ricotta. Oh, it was beautiful. Did you make muffins often? Not as often as he should, But he's a baker, he's good at baking. Oh, okay, yeah, talk. I liked to make cookie, but I've never I bought a muffin tin, but made cupcakes once and then gave up. So, but I need a blueberry muffin. Who can have been more than a blueberry of delicious? Well, I thought I should keep that separate, right, And I think that these are two very different worlds. You know, the muffin was welcomed. I enjoyed it. 00:20:30 Speaker 4: Yes. 00:20:31 Speaker 2: On the other hand, you know we've been in touch about this podcast. I said, no gifts title is right there, for everybody to understand. It's just you don't. You don't get a podcast with the direction and the title that often. That's true. I was a little alarmed when you handed me this gift bag, and I just I knew I shouldn't have, but I had to. I'll give you a gift. I had to. You just could not resist. 00:20:59 Speaker 4: It was I'm an anarchist at heart in every way, So yeah, I took it as a direct challenge and I gave you a gift. 00:21:14 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, should I open it here on the podcast? I would love that. I mean I'll say I wish you hadn't. I will say that, but I understand. Yeah, I'm going to open this card first. Okay, is it something I should read on the podcast? Yeah? I think so. Oh it's a I mean it is a what appears to be a Christmas card. Yeah, it's three shiny Christmas trees. That's beautiful, and it says, oh Bridger, I know you said no gifts, but I but like I had to, so love gablm. Okay, well, I mean that's a pretty clear explanation. Yeah, Like the logic is there. I mean I had to you. Yeah, I mean, there was just no other choice. Yeah, there was a gun to your head and you had to. This is a lovely yellow little piece of sunshine, this gift wrapping, and I'm going to open it. Here. Let's see what's happening in here. Oh, let's say it's small. Now, this could be a tomato. This could be a toe mattillo, This could be a pepper. What is this? That is? What will be a tomato? What will be a tomato? Yeah, it's so like. 00:22:24 Speaker 4: A it's an unripe. It's not right yet, it wasn't he didn't. 00:22:30 Speaker 2: Know the schedule. Well, so I don't. I don't understand vegetables. If I were to allow this to just sit in my fridge or on the counter, will it ripen? That's the hope. Okay, I yeah, I guess bananas do that. They go, yeah, too ripe, And then I assume a tomato would do the same thing. 00:22:50 Speaker 3: That's my thought now that one might take a bit. Yeah, this is a pretty hard it's it's got a nice firm feel. It's definitely totally green at this point to the point that I thought maybe tomatillo, which I mean to be honest, I don't know that I've ever seen a tomtio, So maybe that's looks completely different. 00:23:12 Speaker 2: Uh what sort of tomato is this? 00:23:15 Speaker 4: That will be a roma rum tomato tomato? 00:23:24 Speaker 2: So that you're on a wrack to me? Is this from your garden? That is from my garden? Yes? Are you I'm trying? Yes, I like the garden, but I'm not amazing at right? That makes sense? So is have you been a lifelong gardener or is this something like since moving into a house. 00:23:49 Speaker 4: It is, I would say I'm in year five or six. It was like the first apartment I had that had a backyard, right, that's when I got into it, and which was not where I live now but the place I lived before and now I still have a yard, but I got into it there. 00:24:08 Speaker 2: And also yeah, it's like I think an la thing for me, right right, Yeah, I don't know that this is this feels like the easiest place to be a gardenner. Well except the lack of total absolute lack of rain. 00:24:23 Speaker 4: Lack of rain is harge, it's limiting. Heat waves are hard. Right, So what was the initial gardening experience for you? Did you plant just one thing and it died or did you just over you do? There was like a very oddly shaped, kind of trying almost the shape of Nevada. I would say, patch in a backyard. The not my current place, but the place before this had a little patch in the backyard, right, And I planted a lot of things in their flowers, plants. Some things lived, a lot of things died, but slow things came together. Sure, I had one little strawberry plant in there, and I would get like three strawberries a year. It was my big harvesting. Always really left. They were great. 00:25:12 Speaker 2: They were absolutely great. 00:25:13 Speaker 4: Yeah. 00:25:14 Speaker 2: Did the strawberry plant become like a regular sized plant that was only producing three strawberries? Or was it just like this is as big as I am, I can only do three. I think I really jammed it in there, didn't give it. What I have learned is that you're not supposed to plant things so close together. 00:25:29 Speaker 4: They need to grow and spread out. But I was, like I said, it was this oddly shaped little thing. I just I crammed a whole a whole nursery in there and let them just sort of thin for themselves. 00:25:42 Speaker 2: Sure, and have you found any plant easier to maintain than others? 00:25:47 Speaker 4: Well, certainly out here the succulents are the easiest. They need the leaves. The tomatoes are really easy if you don't have shade. 00:25:55 Speaker 2: But that's the big challenge in my backyard right now. There's no shade to me, are great? Oh so tomatoes do not want shade. 00:26:03 Speaker 4: They don't want shade. They want someone to be blasted. Yeah, absolutely blasted. And some herbs like that and other ones don't. All right, what else is growing in your garden currently? What like as far as vegetables, herbs, fruits, that's what I mean. We have three tomatoes. Okay, We've got a bunch of a lot of mint, more mint than you could ever do anything with a little bit of basil that's just hanging on. We have a holapo plant that made two pepper. That was what I was hoping was going to be your gifts, because they're actually very funny shades. They're not they don't look like what do they look like? They're kind of a round, oh weird, like they look almost like little egg plants, but they're green and spicy. 00:26:54 Speaker 2: Oh wow. 00:26:54 Speaker 4: I thought this will be really funny if this comes through in time, but there's none available for you right now. 00:27:01 Speaker 2: I hate to hear that type. 00:27:02 Speaker 4: Yeah to hear that, and then everything else is just absolutely burst into flames. Cilantro, dead, dill, dead, time dead. We had lettuce but it got absolutely fried. And also we have a lot of fucking like vermin back there, just like yeah, if you're just squirrels, rats, skunks, everything, everything is coming through at night. So that's another reason, another reason I grabbed that tomato before it was right, because the rats will get it. Of the hundred tomatoes we've grown this pandemic, I would say, we've gotten to eat like five. 00:27:40 Speaker 2: Oh you've got to kid, Now, what are you doing with tomatoes? Just eating them? Throwing them in salads, making throw. 00:27:48 Speaker 4: Them in a salad, throw them in a pasta, Like I said, we've only had a handful. So those are the two things we did, a salad and a pasta. 00:27:57 Speaker 2: No, I want to go. I want to return to mint because I think that mint as an herb is deeply underappreciated. Yes, it felt like it was great a moment. I felt like people were putting it in foods and it was so wonderful to have mint, and now it's vanished to get. 00:28:12 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think I'm guilty of this. I grow so much of it I you so little, right, and everyone's while I'm like, should I just like make a big iced tea or some shit, like just use it all at once. I'm sure a pesto would be great, but yeah, it's like all you want is just a couple of leads. Everyone's small, but we have like three pods of it. It just doesn't stop right. 00:28:35 Speaker 2: It seems very easy to grow. And yeah, I hate to hear that your cilantro has died, because I just as yesterday was thinking I should buy some cilantro to try growing. But oh, I wish. Is it fickle? I have? 00:28:47 Speaker 4: I mean mine was well, tried it twice. It's thickle. It's absolutely thickle. It's one of the ones I tried it from seeds, okay, and it's like it comes on really strong and it looks like the babiest version of it looks like cilantro, and you're like, oh man, I'm killing it right now. This is just about to explode into a bushel of cilantro. And then the next day it was just like brown and gone head. I don't know what happened. 00:29:16 Speaker 2: I don't trust growing anything from a seed. I don't know that I've ever grown put a seed in the ground and then watch it become a plant. I just feel like it gets lost in the dirt and vanishes. Yeah, I just need to mit. I need a plant to start. I need a head start on these things, right. 00:29:31 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I mean it just seemed like the ideal quarantine activity, right, right, even though I thought this would last like a month, honestly, but I was like, Okay, here we go, we're being crafty. 00:29:44 Speaker 2: And then yeah, I tried it twice died both times. 00:29:47 Speaker 4: Bad. 00:29:48 Speaker 2: Do you cook much? Yeah? I like to cook a lot, Okay, but you don't like to bake, like you two split the dude. Yeah, and well he's a good cook too. I mean, at this point six months in, we both do both. Okay, sure, but it used to be more binary. 00:30:06 Speaker 4: I would say he baked and I cooked, But now we both have to do both because we're shut it. 00:30:13 Speaker 2: Right. You have you been pretty closed off from the world. Yeah, I have. 00:30:18 Speaker 4: Like I haven't done an outdoor restaurant or anything like that. I have been doing like social distance outdoor hangs with friends. 00:30:26 Speaker 2: Sure. Yeah, that's about as far as I've gotten. Yeah, you'll drive past these, especially these like sidewalk restaurants and more busy areas where people are literally just like back to back and I don't know, it's crazy. Yeah, And it's usually at a restaurant where I'm like, I wouldn't have eaten their pre pandemic exactly. What does actually you're going to die for? Inane? It does not make a lot of sense to me. 00:30:50 Speaker 4: Yeah, we're both talking about Cafe Figure out of course next to the bookstore. 00:30:56 Speaker 2: It's packed. It's always, it's crazy crazy. I'm so glad that we were thinking of the same thing that really seems to attract a really bad clientele just awfle people. Yeah, and what I don't understand what's happening there? What's drawing them in? Uh? Yeah, I don't know what the appeal is there. I guess it's just they're doing something right, part of some sort of jerk or something. 00:31:25 Speaker 4: It is absolutely back to back to back people all days. 00:31:29 Speaker 2: So strange. 00:31:31 Speaker 4: I'm like scared to like nail something in a mailbox right across the street. 00:31:36 Speaker 2: But no, these people are just out there having bad French food or yeah, Figure is serving. Yeah, do you is there any particular, like particular type of food you like to cook? I run the gamut. 00:31:47 Speaker 4: I guess I circle around Italian Okay, sure, yeah, that's as a genre. 00:31:53 Speaker 2: Just various pastas, this. 00:31:55 Speaker 4: Kind of pastas fresh stuff. 00:31:58 Speaker 2: Yeah, are you kidding? I mean, are you getting fancy or is it fairly simple? I'm getting fancier? Really, what are you doing now? 00:32:05 Speaker 4: I read recipes like as if I'm reading a book, but I'm like, oh, maybe this for the future, and I keep it in mind and we get the groceries and. 00:32:14 Speaker 2: Yeah, have you had any disasters cooking lately or is it? Do you feel like you've got a hold of it. 00:32:21 Speaker 4: It's been pretty smooth. I made a pretty bad steak way overcooked? 00:32:29 Speaker 2: Way, way what happened? I mean, do you like a steak on a more well done anyway? Or I mean I would go medium medium ware. 00:32:38 Speaker 4: There was something I was like, it just just got to wait for me. 00:32:43 Speaker 2: I just kept on. 00:32:44 Speaker 4: It's something that should have cooked for like maybe five minutes, just got a good twenty It just had the last This was on the grill. 00:32:52 Speaker 2: Okay, oh geez. Yeah, and overcooked steak I think is maybe the most miserable thing to eat. 00:32:57 Speaker 4: Because yeah, you're like, shit, yeah, it's supposed to be way through it and I can't. 00:33:04 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's truly said. I just I don't know. I don't know what happened there. What a shame. Yeah, that was that. I don't know that I have the skill to even try a steak. I mean, I'm just learning to, like bake a chicken breast. So bake a chicken breast, you can do that. No, I'm truly, like, in the last month, learned to do that. Okay, guys, So have you been doing mostly takeout? Well, I mean until the pandemic. I mean I had truly never cooked, and now, like I'll do takeout once or twice a week and then cook the rest of the time. Okay. So but like with poultry, I've always just had this fear, you know, because you do have to cook it correctly. Yes, yes, yes, but then you learn, oh I mean, if you have a meat thermometer, yeah, you just do it and maybe if you want to do it a little too much, sure, just make sure it's over one hundred and seventy five degrees. Then you don't have to worry about salmonila absolutely. But yeah, I mean I'm very much a beginner with cooking. I've been baking for years, but cooking has been a whole new world for me. You should just do you just make yourself a cake every day? I make cookies every single day. You do, yes, what kind of cookies? Almost? I mean, I need to break out of it because I've been in a real pattern over the last probably six weeks of chocolate chip cookies. Well they're the best one, I mean, they are the best. But it occurred to me last night. I'm like, I don't even know that my brain is sensing like this sensation anymore because it's so familiar. I need to break that pattern, and so when I return to them, they'll feel new and exciting again, right right, right right. I mean, I'll switch it up, I'll switch up ingredients and this sort of thing. But you know, a little variety wouldn't kill me. 00:34:45 Speaker 4: Are you one of the one of the brown the butter people for your chocolate chip cookies? 00:34:51 Speaker 2: I will occasionally brown the butter, but it is a deeply stressful thing to do, I agree, And every tutorial is like, this is easy, this is but every time I put the butter in the thing, I'm following the directions and I am just sweating those minutes or whatever I'm like, I'm going to burn this and that I'm going to have to start over. I'll be in a bad mood. Yeah, yep, And I it does make a nice little difference. But yeah, I mean is the investment worth that difference? I can't say for sure. I can't tell if it's worth it either. Right, if it weren't so deeply stressful for me, I would probably do it every time. But baking is very relaxing. And this is absolute opposite, like having to babysit. This this melting thing that within a second could be ruined. Right, it feels so mistakes to me. 00:35:42 Speaker 4: I completely agree, and I would not see that the payoff is there. 00:35:46 Speaker 2: No, even bad bad cookies are good right, right, totally. I will enjoy eating. So yeah, like to get an extra like two percent on the flavor scale, it's just not I'm not doing it, agreed. And I also think that you could lie to me and say I brown the butter in those cookies, and I would say, oh, I can definitely tell, and he's doing a ton of work and you don't need to brown it. I mean, if a butter is in the cookie, I'm happy, that's all. Yeah, that's all you need. I feel like you do this every day. I'm doing well. So what I'll do is I'll make the dough and refrigerate it, so I will have dough for three to four days and then start over and got there's always a like a tupperware bowl of cookie dough in my fridge just ready to go. 00:36:38 Speaker 4: Your house just smells am easy because there's cookies flash every day. 00:36:42 Speaker 2: But again we go back to this is just my reality at this point, mirs and know the difference. So I mean this mighty. It may smell like Santa's workshop in here, but I have no idea. But you need to break out occasionally. Like I said, I tried baking cupcakes, but I'm honestly I'm not crazy about a cupcake anyway, So that wasn't a big deal. Yeah, I agree. I don't know. Do you do you have any baking favorites? Eat? 00:37:09 Speaker 4: I love a brownie, and I love a blondie. 00:37:13 Speaker 2: Oh I love a blondie with a chocolate chip. Oh I love that of course. I mean it's essentially a chocolate chip cookie brownie. Yeah, it's the best. 00:37:22 Speaker 4: Yeah. 00:37:22 Speaker 2: I haven't made those. I mean, actually i've never made those. My Mom would make those when we were kids, but I haven't. I recently made brownies for the first time. Phen I mean, of course, like I'm revealing something, but no, I like, I didn't use a mix. I did the whole thing. I bought a good quality chocolate for them. They, I mean, what a treat. That's fine. And the thing my next experiment isn't going to try rye flower. I've the for brownies or brownies. Well, I hate to tell everybody, but rye flower seems to be the new thing on the menu for cook for baked goods. Well, I love to hear it because I loved right me too. It adds an I think it'll have highest depth of flavor. This is the sort of thing I'm looking for. And I feel like I'm now at a point in my baking that I can start experimenting. And I'm thrilled for you. We'll try brownies brownies. I mean. The nice thing about a cookie is it's it requires almost nothing of the baker. You know, you're throwing a bunch of things into a pot and stirring it around, and once you've got that down, that's all you. But browniees you're probably going to be melting something, and so I add one step to things that I'm freaking out. It's brownies are an event for me, and a cake is something that I don't know that I have the emotional wherewithal to even. 00:38:45 Speaker 4: No, I don't think I could get into a cake. I don't think I would get into a cake. 00:38:49 Speaker 2: Yeah, and again, a cake is one of those things where unless it's phenomenal, I'm not. I'm like, oh, this is fine. You're the opposite of a cookie, right, You're not excited to eat it? Right? An average cake is not worth eating, but an average cookie I will eat all. Of course, the best cake of all is a cookie cake. Oh, Gabe, I might hang up on you. What are we talking about? Cookie cakes are the worst to desert? I love them. They are horrible. What are you talking about the Missus Field's cookie cake? Oh? I would I would love one right now, Gabe. It is such an absolute travesty that I'm learning this information. This is truly. I mean, if I had a political platform, this is something. It's nothing. It's the slime. It's a big cookie. Unfortunately, that is deeply untrue. Really is it? It's like a cookie paste? What we're dealing with is a cookie paste put in a and then they're dumping frosting all over it. This is something that I think is I've lost a deep amount of respect for you. R wow wow. But I'd love to hear I mean, any defense that you can come to. I'm I'm happy to sit here and listen, but I'm not going to agree. I think you've only had bad ones. But I mean, isn't there only one? Doesn't only missus Fields make them? Well, I don't know that I've ever had in missus Fields. Oh interesting, the only Yeah, I know that makes it apful. Yeah. 00:40:30 Speaker 4: To me, they're just like a big, huge cookie that you have. They need like a pizza. Where are you get in those place? 00:40:36 Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't even know when the last time I had one is? Oh so this is now the picture is becoming more clear because yeah, the last time you had one, you're probably eleven. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah probably. I'm absolutely with you in theory. I think that the cookie cake is I mean a giant cookie. Who I mean, of course, yeah, I want it a giant cookie. Yeah, I'd love to eat cookie in the ship. Well, you shouldn't make a good one, But I don't know that it's I mean, I don't think that physics, just on a physical level, I don't know that it's possible. It's not going to cook right, it's not going to cook right. I mean it's going to be slime. 00:41:12 Speaker 4: Oh my god, I can't wait for the next time I'm on this show. It's gonna be my gift. 00:41:18 Speaker 2: I mean, I would love you know. I mean, of course, again, I've only ever had them from Missus Fields, and this is a this is essentially a mall nightmare. And even their regular cookies at this point are not that great. You know, Missus Fields. I think in the early nineties, before she lost her way, she was making a good cookie and then she sold out. She sold out, of course, Debbie, Debbie Fields. She's a I got way too much about. But I do think that there the general quality of their cookies is garbage. So then when you uh bring in the fact that they're trying to make it a cake and then they put frosting all over it, that's also another See no, no, I'm not is it fully frosted. No, it's like a sure the wrong thing. Yeah, okay, see that sounds good to me, like the frosting sounds good to you. It's just a little minner frosting. 00:42:07 Speaker 4: It's mostly like a slice of pizza that's made of chocolate chip cookie. That sounds that sounds like the perfect I mean that sounds perfect to me. 00:42:16 Speaker 2: It sounds perfect to me too, But unfortunately I just don't know that. I feel like we're talking about something that could only exist in myth Oh my god, it's my it's my new mission. Yeah, I'm going to find it. Yeah, if you find it, I would love to know, because of course I'm willing to try again as long as it doesn't come from the Fields Corporation. Sure, but oh wow, this is such an interesting revelation. The fact that somebody else might even make a cookie cake is really making my head spin here, and it's rotly convinced. I've had a good one I have. I have such a sense memory of it interesting. I'm going to find it. Yeah, I'm going to find it. It's my new life's mission. I feel like the ones I've had. It's always like at the office and somebody was just given the vague mission of like it's this person's birthday, go get them something that sounds good. That sounds half effort. They go to the mall and buy this thing that's been sitting on under fluorescent lights, like in a like mildly refrigerated container for who knows how long. I mean. They take this really greeny, really greeny icing that's like red. Yes, why would be red? The base of that frost? Yeah, the red is like truly like paint red. It's not oh they put some food coloring in. It's like, oh no, they dumped a gallon of paint into some shortening and then corn syrup. 00:43:42 Speaker 4: I suppose this sounds good. This sounds good. Still, I'm back on board. I'm going to send you one. I'm gonna But then again, I get into the moral territory of like do I want to give the Fields Corporation any money? 00:43:56 Speaker 2: And I don't. I want to just shut them down. I would love for there to be a good cookie retail that I could count on, but I don't know that that exists. 00:44:02 Speaker 4: I would love for you to write a biopic of Debel. 00:44:06 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I would love that. That's a feeling. You could handle it. Oh, what is her life? 00:44:12 Speaker 4: You have? 00:44:13 Speaker 2: What is her life outside of selling her soul? 00:44:16 Speaker 4: You know? 00:44:16 Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean she was a simple baker, and then, uh, you know, I think the temptation is always there. I mean a recent worry I've had. Have you ever been to Lavene Bakery. No. Lavne Bakery in New York makes just maybe the best chocolate chip cookies in the world. But they're expanding. I've noticed that they've they had like two locations in New York and now you know, we're opening in Washington, d C. And then the next step is we're offering frozen cookie dough, and you know, I start to worry. I just, uh, Lavene Bakery, if you're out there, I love what you've done with your baked products, but I feel like you're getting onto a Field style path and we're one step away from making a cookie cake. 00:45:00 Speaker 4: Okay, here's a hopeful version of this story for you that might save save your worries. So I in my neighborhood that I grew up in Philadelphia, there was the best cookies I've ever had were from this Jewish deli that was called Famous Fourth Street Deli. That was the name of the place, very smart branding. I grew up thinking it actually was a famous place. Of course, it was called Famous Famous Deli, of course, the world famous deli. And they had giant chocolate chip cookies, not giant wide but thick right and dns really good. And then now they have an online business where you can buy Famous Fourth Street Deli cookies to ship them anywhere. You can buy them by the dozen. But it's they're clearly not still being made in the deli. They outsourced that. I got them and there's still good. 00:45:53 Speaker 2: You're kidding, Famous Fourth Street Deli. Yeah, in Philadelphia, I mean it. So that's where we get into confusing. The deli still exists. 00:46:02 Speaker 4: The deli still exists, but the cookies were so popular that they I think has spun off a second business. I say, I think, I know, And yeah, and it's it's you. You can still get the cookies at the deli when you go, but also if you don't live in Philadelphia or can't travel there right right because of a global pandemic, you can order the cookies online and they're they're so good. 00:46:29 Speaker 2: And did they only have one variety of cookies or is there no? They have a lot of writing Okay, is there one in particular I should order, just like the chocolate chick. Okay, but they have start. 00:46:39 Speaker 4: They've got peanut butter chip, they've got it with nuts, without nuts, got all sorts of cookies. 00:46:44 Speaker 2: I think they make a snickerdoodle at this point. I love a good snickerdoodle. That, yeah, is one cookie where if it's not great, it's probably not worth eating. But when it's good, Yeah, yeah, snickerdoodle. And I mean, what an insane name. Who was behind that creation? Interesting, whimsical somebody and probably in picturing literally Tigger from We need to pick, It's gonna give me the only him with a. 00:47:11 Speaker 4: Little notepad is what I'm picturing for the invention of the I bet I'm right you probably. 00:47:17 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't know that there's any other logical explanation to someone. Yeah, the name snickerdoodle. Well, you know, every podcast, I'm really trying to resist the temptation to just turn it into speaking about cookies. But you know, the bait was here, and I just went for it, and so that's all. You know, I'm fine that we had this conversation, but I've got to rein it back in because I want to play a game. Okay, do you want to play a game called Gift or a curse or a game called Gift Master. Let's do gift or a curse. Okay, Gabe, I need a number between one and ten from you. Let's eat Okay, for the next minute or so, I have to do some calculating. I have to have a list of things that I randomly calculate from in order to play the game. So you have the microphone. You can recommend something, you can promote something, you can you know, you can do whatever you truly want. I'll be right back. 00:48:10 Speaker 4: Okay, Well, let's see. Since this is a podcast and listeners obviously enjoy podcasts, I'm going to club a podcast that I produced that my husband created and hosted called I'm Afraid That, and he interviews people about interesting fears that they have and then he talks to experts on that fear to give some cultural background. And it's really fun. There's two seasons that are out already. There have been amazing guests. I'm talking Jordan Keel, I'm talking Jenny Slate, Jenni Sa Bravo, our Lady Jay, fascinating people with really crazy fears. Megan Amram, you got to listen. 00:49:09 Speaker 2: It's crazy, Gabe, what a beautiful I mean you were just right there. That felt like we recorded the promo for that podcast. Some people really dropped the ball sometimes, you know, really, Oh no, I'll plug, I'll plug. Look, if you're going to do a podcast, you should plug something, plug something in your life. That so I'm saying, and that's the world we're living in. So well, I've calculated these things that we're gonna be talking about here. Basically, what is going to happen is I'm going to give you an item a subject. You're gonna tell me if it's a gift or a curse? 00:49:47 Speaker 4: And why? 00:49:48 Speaker 2: Very easy, very first up, This is actually a listener suggestion. This is magnifying mirrors, Megan. A listener named Meg and has suggested magnifying mirrors gift or a curse? And I assume doesn't magnifying mirror hotel room. Oh absolutely, a guest. Why a new perspective, greater detail. You got to see the way you've never seen before. Gay, I think it's I think it's great, Gab. You've I forgot to mention the beginning of this that there are absolutely objectively correct answers, and you've you're wrong, You're wrong. I don't know if you're gonna love what you see. I mean, I think this one is very obvious. I mean, in an instant, your self esteem will be destroyed every time with a magnifying mirror. It's a horrifying look at your face. But what a gift humility can be yourself out of this. That's a curse. It's an absolute curse a magnifying mirror. I understand the novelty of looking especially you know, you're looking at your pores this sort of thing, but it's also a horrifying look at the human face. 00:51:11 Speaker 4: I mean, you'll never be the same. You absolutely will think you're better for it. But you know, agree, it's a cookie all over again. 00:51:20 Speaker 2: Oh jeez. I thought we would be on good terms at the end of this podcast, but it's just looking like this is going to be a rough go zero out of zero for one? 00:51:32 Speaker 4: Is that? 00:51:32 Speaker 2: I don't anytime I try to say that, I think, is that how people say it? Uh? You're zero for one? Is that? I think? 00:51:41 Speaker 4: So it feels right to me? Okay, yeah, I would put the winds first. Okay, oh, okay, whatever over one. Yeah, that's that feels right for one. Okay, moving on the second one, gift or a curse having visitors from out of town. Oh wow, of course, why well, okay, look I love the people, right, but the experience of it is hard. 00:52:12 Speaker 2: You become a tour guide. You don't really get to exhale. 00:52:16 Speaker 4: I would say, I feel like, for me when I have visitors from out of town, as much as I love those people, and I do love those people, it's like a hosting thing. It's stressful and uh, you know, it's just sort of it's not as pleasant as real life when you're by yourself, right. 00:52:36 Speaker 2: I mean, in the interest of just disagreeing with you, I was thinking, maybe I say that it's a gift, but it's impossible for me to say that. You know, I think you're absolutely right here. Of course we love to have We love our friends and family coming from out of town. We all do. But the moment, yeah, yeah, yeah, you are no longer allowed to spend one second of your day not thinking about those visitors. Even when you're alone at your home, you're still thinking what are they doing? What are they doing? 00:53:08 Speaker 4: And I and the people who are like, oh, you don't have to entertain me, I'll take care of myself. 00:53:13 Speaker 2: It's not true. That to me is actually that makes the situation way more difficult. I want my visitors to say, this is what I'd like to do here, These are the things that I would like to do. This is I'm the one traveling, and this is what I want to do. Because if they don't I live here, you know, you live in your city and you don't none of us does anything at all, and we don't know what to do, we don't know how to entertain correct, so you become a deeply dis unqualified tour guide. Yeah. I mean there are those elements where it's like you're forced to go see your city and enjoy things you probably wouldn't have previously. But for the most part, it's just such a stressful, stressful. Yeah, it's not as pleasant as just in and out. I just killed a tune out and yeah, I guess right now none of us really has to worry about a visitor from another city. 00:54:10 Speaker 4: So yeah, sadly this is a grass s greener type thing where it's like this is actually also bad. 00:54:16 Speaker 2: Yeah, so I don't know that. I think what I ultimately have to just understand is that I'm not happy with anything and will never be satisfied yep. Okay, so you're one for two. I feel like I said it correctly. There we have one more here. And this is actually another listener suggestion. This is from someone named Susie and she has suggested gift her a curse the W B Frog aka Michigan J. Frog. Are you familiar with Michigan J of course I am. Top hats kind of dancing. He dances, you try. 00:54:52 Speaker 4: Okay, Well, this is a really interesting one because he's had two careers. What career, Well, he was a star, he was okay, well, of course he was an actor performers of a short film where he was a very annoying character. 00:55:13 Speaker 2: That was the joke of it. 00:55:14 Speaker 4: Oh right, And so there's that version of him, and then there's the spokesperson version of him. 00:55:22 Speaker 2: I would say that he's a curse as a star and a gift as a spokesperson. You have to pick one. I'm not taking one or the other. Oh my god. 00:55:33 Speaker 4: Well, then I guess he's a gift because he's got longevity, he's got range, he's multifaceted, he's annoying. 00:55:44 Speaker 2: I absolutely agree. I'm giving just the name Michigan J. Frog. We're right, We're off to the races with that name. We're better for it. What does the J stand for? You know, he's he is annoying. He's like transformed back into a regular frog, I believe from times exactly. That's the thing. Then he's got a cane, I mean what. 00:56:04 Speaker 4: He's singing and singing and singing, annoying this person in his life. And then when the person's like, look I have a singing frog, he just becomes a normal frog and he makes the person look crazy. 00:56:15 Speaker 2: Oh that's funny but also annoying. I love Michigan ja frog. I mean, God, bless this Susie for sending in. I mean that really is I mean, we all are better off because of Michigan J Frog. I agree. So wait, what were you calculating? I have just a huge list of things, and I take the number. I go one, two, three, four, five, and you know when we land on eight, that's your that's I love that. Well, you have to add the element. We've got a level the playing field here. I can't just be picking and choosing. Oh, this is numerology. You've got a yeah, yes, I'm a well I'm a numerologist. I'm slowly losing my mind. And every number means something to me. So I love that. And so here we are, and you've gotten You got two out of three, which is not bad, you know, Okay, I'll take it. I mean, you didn't fail. So yeah, what more can we say about that? We've got to answer a couple of listener questions this book. One of the podcasts is called I Said No Questions. Oh, I should probably just remind everyone that I'm not Joe Rogan. Just realized that I said that at the beginning of the podcast. My name is Bridger Wineger. So welcome to I said no gifts. So here we are, and we're at the final segment of the podcast I said no questions. People are writing into I Said No Gifts at gmail dot com. They need answers, Gabe, let me read the first one. It says, Hey, Bridger, my sister is currently pregnant with the first grandchild in the family, and her mother in law has basically taken control of the entire situation. She's buying furniture, she's buying baby toys, she's buying maternity clothes, she's buying baby clothes, she's buying diapers. She needs to calm down. I need to find the perfect gift that will put this crazy lady in her place. Thought Josh, so this person is uh, you know, competing with a mother in law to become It sounds like person is gay as well, certainly, which I love. Uh, trying to outdo a mother in law with a gift. Oh, the competition is heating up, and it sounds like she has essentially bought everything. 00:58:24 Speaker 4: So she's yeah, she's it's got to be like a onesie that said, like says something that really puts mother in law. 00:58:34 Speaker 2: I you know, I hate grandma but love my uncle. Type of thing. I wish I wasn't. I didn't have to spend time with grandma. Yeah, my grandma, Grandma, My grandma's too much with like an eye roll emoji could be funny, but you have to grand she might this baby might have up to two or more grandmothers, So that's specific enough. If her name is Janet, it would be like Janet's too much or Janet. If you're reading this, I want to go somewhere else or I yeah, Josh, yeah, I think that you do need to be you know, if there's a rivalry here. Being vague about it is not going to do anybody any favors, because sounds like the mother in law is, you know, elbowing her way through the world, and it sounds like this, if you want to establish some level of dominance in this baby's life, you've got to be loud, You've got to be cruel, you know. So I think something along those lines. And I also, I mean, while we're on you know, we were just talking about Michigan j frog. I feel like there's probably a toy there as well. A baby loves a frog toy. I feel like, so frog toy. And then you're like it's kind of an US thing, like you wouldn't get it. 00:59:47 Speaker 4: When Janet's like, I don't when did he get into When did the baby begin into frogs? You can just be like, oh, well, you weren't there, but it was a really special memory for us. 00:59:57 Speaker 2: It's all about I think the driving, the way, just arriving away. 01:00:01 Speaker 4: Yeah. 01:00:02 Speaker 2: I think you just got to make it specific. 01:00:04 Speaker 4: And harsh and uh, don't you know it doesn't have to be. I mean, she's already getting furniture, so you're not going to outspend her, right, I'm smart, out smart, and really just drop the hammer. 01:00:20 Speaker 2: Beautiful Okay, next question, Highbridger and guests. So this person's including you, This strawlish person kind of left you out of the equation, which was unfailed. Hybridge are and guest. For my birthday, both my husband and we've got another mother in law, both my brother. Both my husband and my mother in law unknowingly bought me the same gift, a sewing machine. The sewing machines are different brands but essentially the same, and I have no need for two. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. And they're both waiting to see whose gift I end up returning. What should I do? What's with all these then? Thanks? A not a full name, they're just an A. I feel like a Martinez from NBR. It could be probably is I know she's inn Wow, we've got a lot of competition in these families and the mother in law are stirring the pot and now we've got dueling sewing machines. So it almost to me the wording of this email is, uh, what is she saying? They're both waiting to see whose gift I am. That shot out to me as well, so I feel it seems like something that's maybe more of a problem for a than the people in her life or in their life. 01:01:32 Speaker 1: Uh. 01:01:33 Speaker 2: Yeah, let's see, this is a tough one, right, I think you just got to return and both start over and get yourself a sewing machine. Right, You've got to buy the one that you actually want. Yeah, I'm an independent person. Yeah, you can't pick sides here, because either way there's gonna be uh, there's gonna be a problem. Someone's feelings are going to be hurt. But if you return both, suddenly you've cleared the deck. Now you're clear to purchase a sewing machine of your own. You just have to buy one that's not one of those two. But it seems like right, you know, it sounds like sewing machines a lot of them are the same, so there must be a third option. 01:02:09 Speaker 4: Yeah, I think that's the safest that And then you sew a big trash can and you throw the other ones in there. 01:02:18 Speaker 2: Well, you know, you return both of these, and by a sewing machine, you have now have doubled the amount of money that a sewing machine costs. You buy the most expensive sewing machine, maybe on the planet, sartifactory or something, and then no one's feelings are hurt. This kind of puzzle that your husband and mother in law have set up has been evaded entirely, and the. 01:02:43 Speaker 4: People in your life can get a good night's sleep after all this worry. 01:02:46 Speaker 2: Right, I think maybe so some sort of thing that will bring your husband and mother in law back together, because it seems like there's a fissure there. It seems like there's some something is happening between these two. They don't puck each other, They disrespect and are trying to I mean, I don't even want to get into this, but the mother in law seems like she's gunning for a Is she trying to push her husband out of the picture. I don't know. There's I mean, I love that psychosexual territory and I don't I don't even want to open that door with a sewing machine. So A yeah, return them by yourself, turn them both, get one of your own, and just say, look, we're done. This marriage is over. I'm leaving with my we are done. I'm sewing myself a car and driving the sunset. Well. Congratulations, A congratulations, Josh, You've both been given perfect advice. Okay, but this is the end of the podcast. You know, we've fought, we've come back together, we've fought again, and I feel like ultimately Michigan Jay Frogg saved the day. And I've now had this tomato, which it's more of an experiment for me than anything. I'm going to see what I can wait to see what you do with it. Yeah, I mean, this could be this could become anything. At this point. The world is full of possibilities, and you never know what you're gonna do with a tomato. Maybe it has a worm in it and it takes over my home. I don't Oh my god, that would be amazing. You never know. But for the listeners, for the listeners especially, this is a gift to all of us. So thank you so much for being here. You've just been an absolute delight. And I'm sorry that we can't, you know, see each other in person, or you know, see each other at the low of working out. But maybe someday in the future that one day, I'm sure, Yeah, you know, we're all just going to have to keep doing our thing and listener out there, go enjoy your day or try to do something safe, keep a mask on, you know. Actually, by the time this is released, let's definitely make sure we're registered to vote and make good choices, and I'll see you what or you'll hear my voice And at another point this is the end of the podcast, Goodbye. I said No Gifts isn't exactly right production. It's engineered by Earth Angel Stephen Ray Morris. The theme song is by Miracle Worker Amy Mann. You can follow the show on Instagram and Twitter. At I said no Gifts, And if you have a question or need help getting a gift for someone in your life, email me at I said no Gifts at gmail dot com. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher or wherever you found me. And why not leave a review while you're at it? 01:05:41 Speaker 1: Hell? And why did you hear Funa man myself perfectly clear? But you're I guess you gotta come to me empty And I said no guests are own presences persons. Enough I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me?